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EP145 - A Good Man Is A Dangerous Man
162 Plays4 months ago
Do you believe that confrontation between men is a necessary part of life? Ever wondered why it's often criticized in today's society? If you’ve faced situations where confrontation felt unavoidable, whether it was a heated argument or even a physical altercation, you know these moments can define us as men.
Let’s dive into why confrontation isn't inherently bad, why it's sometimes necessary, and how it fits into our roles as protectors. This is a topic I feel strongly about and will revisit in future episodes because it’s crucial for our understanding of manhood. Society often focuses on the act of yelling itself, labeling it as inherently negative without understanding the context. The negative reaction to yelling overlooks the reasons behind it, such as setting boundaries or addressing disrespect. There are situations where verbal or physical confrontation is essential for asserting boundaries and protecting oneself or loved ones. Avoiding all forms of confrontation can lead to unresolved issues and a lack of respect from others.
As protectors, men must be prepared to confront threats to their family and friends. This readiness includes not just physical capability but also the mental preparedness to handle aggressive situations effectively. Remember, being a good man means being a dangerous man who has it under voluntary control. Confrontation is part of our duty to protect and preside, so let’s embrace it responsibly. Stay strong and be ready to stand your ground.
You’re invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you’re there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.
Transcript
The Role of Men as Protectors: A Cultural Shift
00:00:00
Speaker
Men are afraid of being men. Men are afraid of standing up and being protector. Confrontation is part of being protector. And in this day and age, oh my God, the world is over if two men throw hands. Walk away if you can. It's better, it's smarter. But what if you can't? Sometimes you're going to confront other men. And what's wrong with a man who is being a jerk, having another man call him out?
00:00:26
Speaker
A good man is someone who's going to protect his family because he's a dangerous man. Confrontation is part of being protect-tour.
00:00:34
Speaker
You're a man living in the modern world in a time when men and manhood are not what they once were. You live life on your own terms.
Introducing the Sovereign Man Podcast
00:00:45
Speaker
You're self-sufficient. You think for yourself and you march to the beat of your own drum. When life knocks you down, you get back up. Because in your gut, you know that's what men do. You're a badass and a warrior. And on the days when you forget, we are here to remind you who you really are.
The Necessity of Confrontation Among Men
00:01:05
Speaker
Welcome to Sovereign Man podcast, where we aim to make men masculine. Again, I'm your man, Nicky Baloo. And this is a solo episode. And today's topic is an important one, one that I'll come back to even in future episodes. Why? Because today's topic is about the subject of confrontation between men. I was talking to a man today that I love and respect dearly. And I was telling him about a situation I'm dealing with. And he said, well, the real issue is you yell at people.
00:01:35
Speaker
I'm like, huh? No, I don't think that's a real issue. He says, well, people don't like being yelled at. I don't give a fuck if a man doesn't like being yelled at. If I'm having a confrontation with him, I might yell at him. I'm not going to say that might be the thing I'm going to lead with. But if he can't handle that, that's on him. Now he said, well, that's going to cost you issues and you're going to lose your business. People aren't going to remember that. They just remember that you yelled at them. I don't give a shit that I yelled at them.
Historical and Personal Perspectives on Physical Confrontation
00:02:00
Speaker
Confrontation between men happens.
00:02:03
Speaker
Men are gonna fight. They're even gonna get into fisticuffs. And in this day and age, oh my god, the world is over if two men throw hands. Why? Why? If a man pisses you off, he maybe should get punched in the face. Like the great Mike Tyson said, everybody's got a plan until they get punched in the face.
00:02:23
Speaker
Sometimes you need to confront a man. Sometimes you need to yell at a man. And sometimes, yes, you're going to need to lay hands on a man and hit him. And he might need to do the same with you. So what? Men have been doing this for centuries. Schoolboys have been fighting and yelling at each other in school grounds. And they're trying to make boys be like little girls and not yell at each other. No.
00:02:46
Speaker
It's okay to fight. It's okay to yell. It's okay to throw hands. Nothing wrong with it. It's not just for fucking boxing rings and MMA octagons. It's for real life.
00:02:59
Speaker
It's for real life. You're not going to have every situation turn into a peaceable one. It's not how we're wired as men. It's just not. And what's wrong with that? What is wrong with a man getting into a confrontation with another man? I'm not saying you should go look for it. I'm not saying you should deliberately start it.
00:03:17
Speaker
And I'm saying you should do everything you can and your power to avoid it. But at the end of the day, sometimes you're going to confront other men. Sometimes you're going to need to get into a confrontation. You're going to need to strongly disagree. You're going to need to get in their face. Sometimes you might need to push them. You might need to wrestle them. Sometimes you may need to throw a punch at them. And hey, you might have a punch thrown at you. You might need to be pushed yourself. You might need to have someone wrestle with you. Maybe you're the dick.
00:03:45
Speaker
because God knows I'm the dick sometimes. And not the cool dick like Tricky Dick,
When is Confrontation Justified?
00:03:50
Speaker
Dick Nixon. No, not that, but just a plain old dick, a jerk. And what's wrong with a man who is being a jerk, having another man call him out, get in his face, yell at him, scream at him, throw hands at him even. What's wrong with that? Why is that all of a sudden awful and evil? It's not. Men have been doing this for centuries. Yes, we want to avoid it as much as possible.
00:04:14
Speaker
but that sometimes it's unavoidable. Sometimes it just is. I don't go looking for fights. In fact, I do everything in my power not to get into fights over stupid shit. But let's just say somebody was attacking someone I loved. I'm gonna fight. Let's chase somebody through a swing at me. I might give him the first one for free and try to make him back away, but if he still keeps coming, then I'm gonna fight. I'm gonna take that man's ass down. What's wrong with that?
00:04:42
Speaker
Why is this a problem? Why are people going, no, no, no, you yelled at this guy. You can't confront him. No, no, no, no. It's a good thing. You need to confront some men. All right, confront them. You need to yell at them. You need to scream at them. Don't do this with women. Don't do this with women, just men. It's not your job to back away every time. It's not.
00:05:05
Speaker
Now there's some situations where it makes sense for you to back away. There's some dudes who are just going to want to try to get your goat and get in a fight with you. Back out of those situations. If you don't need to fight, don't fight. But if you need to fight, if you need to stand up for yourself, if you need to stand your ground, if you need to defend a matter which puts people that you love at risk, then fight. If you're having an argument with somebody and it's over a matter of principle and they're coming at you, yell at them.
00:05:36
Speaker
I don't mean start that way, but sometimes you gotta yell at them. Sometimes you gotta let them know, this ain't cool. Don't do that shit, or there will be consequences. And what's wrong with that? What's wrong with that? Does that mean you look for a fight? No, it does not.
00:05:58
Speaker
Does that mean you go starting fights? No, it does not. Hear me clearly. Fighting is not the first option. Fighting is not what you should go look for.
Men as Protectors: Confronting Societal Expectations
00:06:07
Speaker
You shouldn't go look for ways to get into arguments and fist fights. In fact, do everything in your power to avoid them. And if someone's being a dick and trying to get your goat, walk away if you can. It's better, it's smarter. But what if you can't? What if you can't?
00:06:27
Speaker
What if somebody is insulting your woman? What if someone's making her feel uncomfortable and scared? You need to step in and you need to show him that ain't gonna fly. Hopefully without needing to throw hands, but if that dude is making it impossible for you, if he's making her feel uncomfortable, if he's trying to attack her, then you gotta do what you gotta do. You gotta do what you gotta do.
00:06:55
Speaker
What if your kids were being attacked by somebody? What if someone was trying to hurt your kids? You're going to sit there and wait for the cops? No, you got to learn how to fight. You got to learn how to throw hands. What if some son of a bitch is out there attacking you, insulting you and not backing out when you're trying to be cool? You're going to sit there and take it and tell him you better watch himself because there's consequences to that sort of behavior.
00:07:22
Speaker
We have turned our world into such a feminized, pansy-ass space that men are afraid of being men. Men are afraid of standing up and being protector. And confrontation is part of being protector. My buddy Ryan Mickler of Order of Man says, men gotta do the three P's. Preside, protect, and provide.
00:07:47
Speaker
The enemy out there wants us to be weak, wants men to be weak, wants men not to be able to throw hands, not to be able to fight. That's what they want. We as a society need to make it okay for men to be men again. I'm not saying condoning fighting all the time, condoning idiots losing their shit for no reason. I'm not saying that. I'm saying stop demonizing fighting. Two dudes getting into a fight should not end up
00:08:12
Speaker
You know, in both of them being thrown in jail for months and years. No, should not happen. Now a dude fucking badly disabling somebody and hurting him, that's a different story. But just getting into a fight, come on. Guy gets a black eye, big fucking deal. Don't try to kill the other fellow, but you know, maybe show him that certain behavior ain't cool. That's why if you're around Mike Tyson, don't say stupid shit to him. Because Mike,
00:08:42
Speaker
We'll show you the consequence of that. In your life, maybe you're not Mike Tyson, but maybe you need the Mike Tyson attitude that you're going to be a good man. You're going to be a nice man. You're going to speak properly to your fellow man and woman, but you're not going to be disrespected and you're not going to let the people that you love be threatened. This
00:09:06
Speaker
It's something powerful. It's something important. It's something that every man's gotta get. Confrontation is not inherently bad. Confrontation is sometimes necessary. Necessary. Man's gotta be ready to step up. Man's gotta be ready to confront his fellow man.
00:09:31
Speaker
And a man's gotta be okay with being the kind of man who's ready to confront, ready to fight if need be. There's evil out there in the world. And we men need to be the first line of defense, not the cops. The cops are there if we need them. But let me tell you something, if someone's coming at your family and you call the cops, they could be dead by the time they get there.
00:09:52
Speaker
You need to be ready to do what you gotta do to protect your family. Learn how to confront, learn how to get people who are being aggressive to show that, hey, there's a sheepdog over here and these wolves better back off. This episode may be a popular episode and it may be an unpopular episode. That's just the way it goes. I believe that a good man is a dangerous man who has it under voluntary control.
Defining a Good Man: Protection and Control
00:10:16
Speaker
That's a quote from the great Jordan Peterson.
00:10:19
Speaker
A good man is a dangerous man who has it under voluntary control. But that statement presupposes that there are times where that good man can let it slip. Protect. Provide. Preside. Don't skip over protect. Not now. Not ever. Your job is to protect.
00:10:44
Speaker
not back away from every confrontation, not get into fights and say, oh, no, no, you yelled at somebody. You shouldn't have done that. Yelling is bad. Yelling is not bad. Yelling is just yelling. There are times yelling is good. There are times it's unnecessary. That's it. I'm Nicky Birloom, the founder of the Sovereign Man Movement, the host and creator of the Sovereign Man podcast.
00:11:13
Speaker
And a man who feels strongly and deeply about the issues that affect men to help you be a man, a good man. Not a nice man, but a good man. Because a nice man is not a good man. Someone is going to get his family killed. A good man is someone who's going to protect his family. Because he's a dangerous man and he has it under voluntary control.
00:11:41
Speaker
Baloo, ouch.