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Savage Worlds - The Phony Express 2.9: Rynnie Does A Bad Bad Thing image

Savage Worlds - The Phony Express 2.9: Rynnie Does A Bad Bad Thing

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In the aftermath of their battle with Sloth, The Phony Express discover a strange ripple effect throughout Doodad. Also, they still need to do that job with Nitroglycerin...
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Transcript

Humorous Banter and Introductions

00:00:24
Speaker
Here comes the flow! I'm feeling so flown. How you like me meow? What the fuck was that? I almost said g'day. I was watching this supposed to head to Crocodile. Crocodile Dundee showed up on a list I was watching on YouTube and my brain was singing g'day. That's a nod. Crocodile did these on the list now. He's on the list. It just scared me. I thought I was like, oh shit, did I just accidentally open up my YouTube? Because I was watching a million fucking cop videos the other day.
00:00:54
Speaker
Good day, everybody. If you want to say if you want to speak good Australian, just say the word good and then say the word I. And that means a good day. Good eye. Good eye. Now you know how to be Australian. Anyway, good morning, good afternoon and good eye, ladies and gentlemen, not binary folks of the universe. No, no, no, this is rollers. Welcome back to the Phony Express. That was a happy accident, guys. Anyway, we are back in doodad. We are here with
00:01:23
Speaker
Uh, Ren and Cutter and Maverick, um, played by three human beings named Cass, Justin, and Adrian.

Recap of Last Adventure

00:01:30
Speaker
And, uh, last time, Justin, what happened in Doodad? Bad things. We killed a demon. With a giant T. Allegedly. And Maverick squirted on him. Allegedly. Maverick pulled out his big old fat super soaker and squirted him right in his hole.
00:01:52
Speaker
I believe and we jammed our wood in there and he died. As long as the train crashed and then everybody came back to life and everybody was all happy. Friends saved the day.
00:02:10
Speaker
Rin, save the day, sorry, Rin, only Rin, save the day. They would have not gotten back had she not played that Golden Fiddle, so you know, just saying, she got that train back. We could argue that Sheffi saved the day then because Sheffi gave you the fiddle. She didn't give her any instructions, Rin figured that shit out.
00:02:34
Speaker
It was a team effort, guys. It was a team effort. I know I'm fucking with you. It was a team effort. I'm fucking with you. So, yeah. And so, Ishii is a Zapdos now, according to Adrian. So she's got like little metal pieces on her and she's got like kind of like a thunder thing, which I don't really have any stats for yet. So don't ask me. I'm just going to figure it out as we go.

A Day in Doodad

00:03:02
Speaker
Anyway, we're back in do dad. Uh, hang on. Uh, wait, where is it? The sun is shining on a beautiful day and do dad. You always had a wonderful night's sleep. Um, uh, I don't know where you all spent your evenings. I assume at your respective rooms in the brothel, but the sun is shining. The birds are chirping. The peckers are peckering. Um, tell us about, uh, your morning, uh, cutter.
00:03:33
Speaker
If Bathy's room is a-rockin', don't come a-knockin'. Okay. Was it rocking? I wake up, and Cutter's walkin' bow-legged, but not from ridin' horse. Tryin' to bow-legged. He goes down to the old... It's almost like no crazy shit has happened, just the same old goes down to the bar at all. Sits at this bar, waits for his morning breakfast goulash to come out.
00:04:03
Speaker
the breakfast goulash oh hello kado the usual goulash and i'll be all right there thank you very much there you are friend
00:04:18
Speaker
Just kidding I was pretending see I just got numb numb nobody eats that way cut it Yeah, follow you on your on your lap, but you'd have to wash off your pentaloons Yes, how did you sleep? Oh, you know pretty good like a little baby would do who a baby? Yeah Like all swaddled in a banky
00:04:46
Speaker
Uh, well, yeah, I was, I was bound. I was up there in the covers. Yeah. Did you share the night with a certain someone? Oh, you know, Jim, I don't like that. Oh, I can tell a talk and do and tell, you know, do things and talk about them. I don't like to do things and talk about it.
00:05:06
Speaker
That's so funny to me, you know me I don't like to do things to talk about it God I'm ready for my breakfast goulash. What kind would you like hot spicy or hot and spicy? I would like hot and spicy. Oh good choice. That's all I have. I'm glad you said that
00:05:34
Speaker
There you go. Thanks. No, no, no, no, no. Wait, remember, you can do that. You can eat that way. I always eat like that. Oh, man. Chef, I mean, you're just having a discussion. People can't do that. I love I was like, I always eat like that. You never notice. I eat like that all the time. I'm numb numb. Oh, so never kind of just sleep, my guy. Oh, you know, like like a baby was like really like swaddled in a bank.
00:06:03
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, I was like, oh, that's cute, waking up, crying for my mommy and daddy and then went back to sleep. Oh, we've all been there, brother. We've all been there. What is Renipu up to?
00:06:17
Speaker
Renee poo is probably out playing with the dogs in the yard with her new puppy because she got that new she got that new puppy new baby little chefy or chefy jr. Yeah chefy jr. Yeah and probably just you know throwing the ball for him and stuff and playing and
00:06:39
Speaker
Oh, okay. Throwing, uh, do an athletics roll for ball throwing. Yeah. Throwing. That's throwing and rolling at the same time. You figure it out. It's like, it's like skipping a rock on the ground. Two athletics. Rolling. No, just one. Uh, you know, just kind of for the both of you. Wow. Five. You, you, you throw so hard. Uh, but that little puppers, like he is undeterred and chefy junior goes running. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. And he picks up that ball and brings it back to you.
00:07:07
Speaker
Uh, and he's going to do a little spins and he gets distracted by his tail and starts chasing it. Sounds about right. Um, well, she's just gonna, um, did I just lose anything? Nope. We're right here. We're here for you. Sorry.
00:07:27
Speaker
Uh, it got really quiet for a second and I thought I lost connection. Um, the, she's gonna go back inside and connect with the boys. Uh, you go in there and the boys are sitting, having goulash and you hear, let me try, let me try. It's just spilling out of my mouth. I don't know how you do it. You just take like both your fork and your spoon.
00:07:53
Speaker
And you just use both your hands to like really shove it in there. Like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Man, after bad, they teach me words and numbers and such. I'm going to have to have you teach you how to eat properly. It's on your pants again. Oh dear. That's all right. That's like where pants for is to catch all the drippings. What are you guys doing? We're eating breakfast. Yeah. Oh, you're having goulash for breakfast. That sounds about right. Yeah.
00:08:24
Speaker
Morning, chefy. Good morning, Ren. How would you, would you like some goulash? Uh, no, I would just like my normal plain toast and coffee, please. All right. Everybody eat the goulash. The rest of the day. Come on, we got to celebrate, Ren. Get the spiciest one. You can't start the day off right. We, we've been through it.
00:08:54
Speaker
Fine. I guess, Chefie, give me a bowl of goulash. The whole, the whole brothel erupts in celebration. So, uh, run the goulash for everyone. And then everybody comes and gets a big to the goulash buffet. Oh, you know, I like it hot and spicy.
00:09:24
Speaker
Oh, dear. Good. That's all that I've made. Here you are. I'm dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb now. Oh, you put extra mushrooms in us this time because you know, I like it with extra mushrooms. Oh, you know, a little extra mushrooms, a little extra other things that were imported from Canada and other places.
00:09:46
Speaker
Ooh, that sounds delicious. Thanks, Chefie. I thought I tasted goose in this. Yeah, Canada goose is... Yeah, so you guys have your goulash. Is there anybody that you want to talk to in the brothel or out in town? Like, you know, you have a fresh start to your day. What do you guys want to do? I want to wash my bird. You want to go wash your bird? It's been a long time.
00:10:14
Speaker
It's been a long time. Bird still works. You gotta be careful. You know, that bird's got electrical exposed electrical parts on there. You gotta be real careful not to get her all wet. It's a good point. Then probably not a bath, but more like a careful scrubbing. Like a careful scrubbing. Okay. So you take her over to the bath house.
00:10:36
Speaker
The bathroom. I don't know if we if we. Bath time. Yeah. Did we say at the back? If when Bathy does her job, is it outside or is it like a room in the brothel? No, it's like on the outside. Just it's like the the scene in Shanghai noon where there's like the the outside bathtubs. But I think they have like an actual room. But I when we described it, it was outside the brothel just outside.
00:11:07
Speaker
door of the kitchen okay then let's do it there let's do it there so you do that you you're out there bathing your bird would you please roll um let's call it an agility roll to see yeah to see if you can keep your bearings and do it right well that's an eight yeah you don't you don't get any water you're very you're so careful
00:11:37
Speaker
As like, you know, she kind of lands on the edge of the tub. Um, and definitely looks like a bit tentative to even touch the water, but you know, she trusts you. So you get a little scrubby scrub in there. Uh, some bonding time.
00:11:52
Speaker
You know and she still looks a bit Still looks a bit worn out. You know she's still got some you know You know some dirt you're scrubbing off her from when she got whacked into the woods And she you know buckshot like resin all over her body She looks pretty tuckered out though even though you guys slept all night She looks like she still had a you know she's been she's been through the wringer. Yeah, maybe let's say at home today Hecker Yes home because you don't look very
00:12:21
Speaker
right, right before adventure just now. Uh, you hear a little, uh, I knock on the, um, on the door before it opens and comes outside, um, into the little area where the barrels are and bath. He comes out and she's like, Oh, Hey Maverick. Oh, Hey Ishi. How's, um, how's it going? Are you guys okay? I'm here doing totally fine. And I like give her a big thumbs up. Oh, wow. That's the biggest thumbs up I've ever seen. Yeah. That's how well I'm handling the situation.
00:12:50
Speaker
Oh, what? Oh, because of the bandits that attacked last night. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, because of the

Mission Planning: Transporting Nitroglycerin

00:12:56
Speaker
yeah, it was Yeah, I can't believe we almost got our town taken over by bandits. If not for you guys from the Phoney Express, I don't know what we would have done. You know, there's something not quite going like feeling right. You talk about bandits, but yeah, let's say it was bandits. I
00:13:16
Speaker
You know what? I know that you guys just got up. You're still getting your day started. So, you know, maybe, you know what? I'll go see if I can get the gals to get you a cup of coffee or something. Okay. For when you're done. That's a great idea. Thanks. Yeah. I know. Um, I know Sheriff Jeff stop by earlier to get his usual pot. So there should be some already boiling somewhere for you. That's great. Thanks. Okay. Well enjoy, enjoy your bath. And she comes over and gives just a little pat, a little pat on her head and walks away, uh, back into the room and close the door behind her. She leaves a towel for you guys to dry off with.
00:13:47
Speaker
Yeah, that is a professional. She's a pro. You know what? She gets up early. She rises with the sun. It's a job done. You know, that's. Yeah, that's her. That's her. That's her bread and butter. Rin, what do you do after you guys eat your morning breakfast? She is going to look at Qatar and see if he would like to go see if there are
00:14:15
Speaker
any jobs available in town for him. I can't pull it off. Why are you looking at me like you're thinking about you want to ask me something? What are you looking at me for? Oh, sorry. I was wondering maybe if you'd want to go see if we got any jobs in town or something.
00:14:36
Speaker
Oh, I mean, I guess. I don't, did we just get one before all this craziness happened? Mutton Tops gave us a normal old, regular old job, getting some high explosive materials. Oh, did he? Don't we? Yeah. I forget from where. I think we're just going to go to Jensen's once we got it. Yeah. Oh, that's right. In Winchesterville, wouldn't it? I don't know. Beats the shit out of me, Ren. Oh, sorry for my file alignment. I'm still a little.
00:15:05
Speaker
Huh. Well, I guess we should go see.
00:15:09
Speaker
Winchesterville was where Mavericks kid is from. Oh, that's right. That's right. Yeah You have to go pick up I mean you would probably remember since like you guys like, you know, maybe you wouldn't but like the idea was that you need to go to Grand Lake and pick up some Nitro and then deliver to a guy in Jensen. I was gonna say it's Grand Junction, right? That's where we're going. That's what I remember I Want to check back with him. He didn't give us a note did he?
00:15:37
Speaker
Uh, I don't see one. I, with all the craziness with like the train and everything, like we might just have to go back and see him and just get a refresher and I need to check on bitey. And I mean, I've got all those horses now that like I saved. So like I have some to like, at least take just in case. So, um, yeah, I guess we could go talk to men shops and see, or get just a refresher on the job.
00:16:06
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, I walk over with you bust out. I'll go over to stable and check out. I ain't seen butter that much since I was jumped off her. So, uh, yeah. Yeah. She's, she's, she's a good pony. I, she took really good care of me. So then I took good care of her. So yeah, that's right. Yeah. I gotta go pay my, give her a good scritchen and all that. So yeah, I'll do that. Get her behind the ears.
00:16:32
Speaker
Cool. All right. Well, um, I guess we'll go down in and see mutton chops. Uh, okay. So you guys go down to the phony express. Um, and, uh, mutton chop Joe's sitting where he's always sitting. Uh, and you see that Evans kind of running around and he's trying to put up a new banner. Um,
00:16:55
Speaker
He's like, how about here, boss? Was over here fine? Which one? Which one? Which one, boss? And Mutt and Chop show is kind of unresponsive, just staring daggers through him as he watches him trying to hang a new banner up on the wall as you guys walk in. What do you do? I imagine when Michael Scott had to do therapy with Toby, he just stared at him with his mouth all dragged on him.
00:17:24
Speaker
I was raised by wolves. And by the way, I walk with Rin there, but then I, then I make a turn to the stables next door and I go to the horse or something to see butternut and such. Okay. Cool, cool, cool. So Rin, you walk into the Phony Express and you see what I said that you see.
00:17:41
Speaker
Perfect. So she's going to walk in and she's going to take the chair that's right next to Mutton Chop and just kind of like spin it around where she like straddles the chair. Like, what's up, Joe? Hey, what's up? How's your morning? It's okay, you know.
00:18:07
Speaker
We got fed some goulash this morning, which is not my normal breakfast, but hey, you know, I feel like I feel good. I feel good. I feel good. So now I'm ready. I'm ready to work. Um, and the only thing is, is like that with all of the craziness and everything, like we kind of forgot our job that we're supposed to do. So, um, I was just coming in to like, get like a refresher so that like we could go get that done. Oh, uh, yeah.
00:18:36
Speaker
So yeah, about that. You got to go pick up some nitroglycerin from Grand Lake and deliver it to a guy named Todd in Jensen. Todd. All right. Yeah. Interesting guy named Todd over there. Jensen needs this.
00:19:02
Speaker
Did they end up rebuilding Jensen then? Because last I knew, we burnt that place to the ground. Oh, yeah. You may have forgotten, but the reason he wants to Nitro is to blow up the rest of Jensen and pretty much rebuild on it. Oh, yeah, I guess that makes sense. Okay. I'm going to demolish the whole town.
00:19:29
Speaker
Well, to be fair, that place was a farce of the country. So, um, all right, cool. Well, um, I'm going to take Carter with me and, uh, I think I'm going to check on Maverick, see if he wants to go with, I'm not sure if he's going to end up going, but I know for sure. Cutter is going to go. Um, and then, uh, we'll see you later. Okey dokey. She takes her robot hand and tickles him underneath the chin.
00:20:00
Speaker
Uh, and then like, when you're done, like Evan jumps off of his little step ladder and then like, starts wiping off his chin. I got a boss. I got it. You're fine. No worries. I'll give you a beautiful shave here in a second. Not the button chops though. Right. Right. Am I going to get paid soon? Um, as he continues to buff a mutton chop space as you walk out the door, uh, cutter, you're in the horse stables, right?
00:20:27
Speaker
a a a a a a a a a a a a a
00:20:56
Speaker
You see a couple just having a morning stroll. I don't know if you'd recognize them or not. You can tell me, but you see just maybe like a late 20-something couple walking together hand-in-hand. They see you by the stable and the guy goes, is that Cutter O'Toole over there? Yep, that's him, the one feller. Yep, that's me.
00:21:20
Speaker
We just we just want to thank y'all again for for the service you did and taking out them bandits yesterday You know and we were just thinking you know like if you ever need anything from us like cup of sugar Cup of coffee. I mean really anything that's got cups cuz that's kind of mostly what we got You know if you ever need anything you just come by swing by the house the homestead well we got you know We'll take care of you. I really appreciate you sending them bandits away L.A. Yeah, you know I mean A's everything's we're all in this together, right, you know Yeah, and the lady turns and she goes
00:21:50
Speaker
Just, oh, yeah, absolutely. And just so you know, also, you know, I am working on opening up my own massage practice. So if you ever need to get like a little rub down, you just go, you know, anything that you and the Phony Express need, you guys come by, by our homestead. Okay. Oh, yeah. All right. That's, that sounds pretty nice. Thank you, folks. Let's, let's use folks' names again. I'm sorry. Oh my God. Rub, rub, cup, cup, dabu.
00:22:15
Speaker
I'm sorry. What did you just have a stroke? I was just thinking of like their name for their business and I got that What? I Don't know There's this old video from World of Warcraft where the peons were like work work zugs like Dabi oh I see
00:22:42
Speaker
Yeah, come on down the rub rub cup cup the rubbing cup What was that cutter just glad everybody's safe, that's you know, that's that's main thing. Oh, yeah
00:23:03
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you so much. Uh, you know, and, um, anyway, just, uh, we weren't sure if we were going to see this morning, you know, what we think of you rested at all, but, uh, you know, really, we're really appreciative, right, baby? And he's like, yeah, really, really appreciative of what, of what you did for us. Well, you don't, don't even, uh, I don't even mention it. It's not, uh, you know, happy to do it. Happy to, you know, make sure everybody's okay. Yeah. And, uh, oh, by the way, uh, you asked, you asked our name.
00:23:33
Speaker
I'm Jim Jones. This is Mrs. Jones. Uh, and would be happy to make your acquaintance again. Right. Yeah. I'm sorry if I don't, if I don't remember, you know, we're always doing all sorts of things running around all these places. I mean, all sorts of crazy people with my mind goes crazy. But thanks you, Mr. and Mrs. Jones. That's really nice seeing folks there. Yeah. Yeah. No, you know, probably, you know what? Me and, uh, me and Mrs. Jones, we're going to head on out now, but, uh, again, swing by anytime if you want to rubber a cup.
00:24:03
Speaker
All right. Bye, Jim. Misses. Uh, well, that's happening. Maverick, you finished your bath with Ishii back in the, um, back in the brothel, uh, and everything. Uh, what do you do once you wrap up and, uh, get dried off and get Ishii all clean? I try and like tuck Ishii back into like my bed and then leave. You know, it's like Ishii into your bed.
00:24:33
Speaker
Yes. Oh, that's nice. You let her sleep in your bed. She like nuzzles again. She nuzzles against the pillow and kind of just like. You know, she she pretty much makes herself into like a little baby. Bjorn just rolls until like the blankets wrap around her. Oh, it's like follow me. Yes. So, yeah, she's she is pooped. She is totally fine with just staying in bed all day and having a lazy day in. And I'll.
00:25:02
Speaker
leave the brothel and try to see if I can find any traces of where my companions went. Uh, yeah, sure. Um, so you head back out again, the town, the street that you're on ain't that big. Like you can see down the way, like the phony express, you could probably see cutter like standing outside the stables,

Town's Gratitude and Fun Interactions

00:25:22
Speaker
chatting up Mr. and Mrs. Jones, um, down the street. You probably don't see ring just yet. So you probably still inside talking to much job Joe. Um, but I head into the direction of cutter.
00:25:32
Speaker
Oh, you head towards cutter and like, as you're, as you're walking, um, you bump into, oh, you don't really bump into him, but like you come across a couple of kids that are like playing dice in the street. They're rolling these little, little wood metal dice. Uh, you know, and they're going, yay. Uh, and the one little kid goes, Hey, Mr. Mr. Maverick, how you doing, sir? I'm doing pretty fine. How are you doing? I'm seeing you play a nice little game there.
00:26:01
Speaker
Oh yeah, we're playing dice roll. We just roll the dice and then you go, woo! There aren't any more rules to the internet. No, but we're working on one where maybe you can also pretend like you don't like what you rolled and then we go, oh, dang it. But then my momma sometimes will slap me if I say bad words like that. Yeah, don't say bad words. That's not good for your mouth. If you say too many bad words, your mouth will fall off.
00:26:25
Speaker
He like, like puts his hands over his mouth. He goes, don't say dang anymore. Oh shit. Oh, dang. I do. I do feel my mouth getting loose. Oh no. But I had an idea. Maybe if you like roll a really high number, then you can be like excited. And if you roll out really low, low number, then you like become like, Oh no.
00:26:54
Speaker
Oh well, what's a low number, what's a high number? Is it like, is the dice like with like six dots and like, what kind of dice? Yeah, the biggest dice we got is one, two, I think that's six, yeah, six, six on there. So yeah, if you have like, of the six dots on there, then you say like, yes. And if it's like one dot, then you say no. What about all the dots in between, Mr. Maverick? That's like up to your interpretation.
00:27:22
Speaker
Okay, guys, new rule. If it's six, we go. Yeah. And if it's a one, we go. Oh, no. And if it's everything in between, we'll just we'll make it up and they'll go. Oh, yeah. Oh, no. And they're there. They seem like they're into it. You've kind of helped them start to tailor their game a bit. Little entrepreneurs they might be. And if you want to make it really complicated, you can make it like that one person, like roll something higher than they earn a point.
00:27:52
Speaker
And like the point of the game is to like get as many points as possible. Oh, so now it's a competition, a competition. Yeah. Oh, dang. Well, hey, you know what? We, my mama told me that if I seen you around town when we was playing, uh, that I should just say thank you on behalf of my mama and my pa and me, uh, and my sissy, because, uh, what y'all done did getting rid of bandits last night. Oh yeah. That's bandits. Sure.
00:28:19
Speaker
You're welcome. Yeah. Yeah. We're just really grateful for y'all. And, um, I mean, for real, we, you know, none of us are really trained fighters. We typically live a pretty peaceful life here. Sheriff Jeff was, uh, you know, overwhelmed and just, you know, I don't, I don't know if he would have been able to take all them by himself. So if not for the experience, I don't know what we're doing here. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you again. Cause you know, like last night, these streets were filled with, with, with blood. Now, now we can roll dice in them. Yeah.
00:28:48
Speaker
You can paint your dyes red. I mean, yeah, I don't have any paints on account. It's expensive, but sure. Yeah, we could maybe do that someday. And there'll be special dyes that will account more points. Right. Well, you know what? My brain's too tiny to do too many rules. You'll get used to it. Yeah, I heard my mama said if I keep eating my broccoli and beans, that my brain will get bigger. Yeah. Also,
00:29:18
Speaker
Try and practice reading. It's always good for your brain. Yeah. Yeah. Um, uh, Ms. Bathe sometimes, you know, if we see her around, like she'll read us a little story. So, you know, I think maybe, maybe one day I might, I might learn to read stories too. You can also go to Kata like he has also done some great advances in reading. Oh, really? We never tried to read to us before. Yeah. We should, we should go talk to him. Probably. Yeah.
00:29:41
Speaker
Would I be nice? Well, maybe maybe I'll thank him too when we're done playing dice. But since we've seen you first, I just want to let you know, you know, we really appreciate y'all. Yeah, that's nice. You're our hero, Mr. Maverick for being an old guy. I mean, an older guy. I mean, you're just you're not young. You know what I mean? Our older our elder. You know, I might look old but inside I've become young again. Gross. Have a nice day.
00:30:07
Speaker
Bye. Um, so you go meet with, you walk down the street, making your way towards cutter, making your way downtown. Uh, as you see, uh, uh, Rin pops out the door of the phony express. Um, you guys are about to converge together. What do you do? Take it away. Gang. You free your knighted again. Hey Maverick, are you coming with us? Yes.
00:30:36
Speaker
Okay. I am ready to bring justice to this land. All right. Well, uh, I don't know about justice, but we have to go take this nitroglycerin from the lake to the guy in Jensen and that way they can blow the town up. So I guess that's, I guess that's justice if we really think about that. Cause, um, so yeah.
00:31:05
Speaker
you guys are down oh uh i should check on the wagon do we have an extra wagon what's that maverick as if you guys notice that people keep talking about bandits even though they run bandits they keep talking about bandits
00:31:28
Speaker
Yeah. Oh, hey guys. What'd you say about Bannus? I didn't know if he was actually right next to me or if he was coming over me. So I don't want to talk yet, but I'm going to say, you said, yeah, we're coming up to you. Yeah, we're all together. Yeah. Yeah. We're all together. Hey. Yeah. The Joneses came by and first of all, I was, if you guys, I was still clear at him. Mrs. Jones talking about giving massages to people. That's kind of strange to me. Why would you be touching other people's bodies when you don't even know that's crazy. I mean, the bats are one thing, but anyway, um,
00:31:58
Speaker
Hmm. She can have a job at the brothel. I don't see my entrepreneurials. They're going to make a, I heard them muttering something about cups of bucks and ducks and goopy goopy or something they were saying. That's why I'm talking away. But, uh, yeah, man, they said, they said, what? No, what? Huh? I said, that's interesting. No, what did they say now? They said, uh, we fought off bandits last night too. So maybe everybody thought it was bandits instead of, I look around and I'm like, demons.
00:32:29
Speaker
Maybe. I don't really know like what caused that, but maybe instead, maybe their memory is like, or like weird. Yeah, I don't know. I'll be careful with what we do and say, I suppose. But yeah, I guess we got to see how people do what they say.
00:32:49
Speaker
Yeah. Well, maybe it's just what they put in their memories to account for the ghost train or whatever, since they took all the adults and then they're all back. Maybe that could be it. I don't know. I see like, I'm not proud of those kids that Maverick was talking to, but I see like a couple of kids running down the street with like the little hoop sticks. I'm like, hey kids, hey, hey, hold on. Sort of hoof down real quick.
00:33:10
Speaker
Oh, hi, Mr. Cuddah. Hey, kids, what you kids remember about the crazy stuff that went on last night? That the Phoney Express saved the day. They cheer. Yeah, it was very nice of you, little villain. But you don't remember, like, you know, how do we save the day? Why, you drove the bandits out of Dudad. Oh, OK. You don't like maybe remember your parents going missing?
00:33:40
Speaker
I mean, some of the bandits tried to kidnap my mommy, but you didn't let them. Oh, okay. Okay. I look at, I look at, we're getting somewhere now. Okay. So, um, as far as you know, Young's feller there, uh, the bandits had just come and was about to take, they didn't get to take your parents. They was about to. And that's when we stopped them. Yeah. You drove them out of do dad. I mean, a couple of them, you had, you had to shoot, but, but you drove them away. They got scared of the phony express.
00:34:07
Speaker
Yeah, that's right. Oh, thank you, Sonny. It's this is this is one of them weird adult things adults do to kids make you make sure you're remembering what you're remembering, right? So good job, feller. I know I wrote it in my diary. Well, that's good. I pull a nickel out of my pocket. I flick it to him. There you go. Oh, that's very well. It's rolling away. Hang on. He's gonna get tummy ache off all the candy he's gonna buy with that.
00:34:35
Speaker
You hear like the little girl that's with the guys. You're gonna get a tabernet without a candy you're gonna buy for debt. His sister is Elmo. Anyway, so yes, that's what they say. Now what? That's interesting, guys. I guess whatever, even the kids' memories were different from that happening too.
00:34:56
Speaker
Yeah. It's probably better that they know that story than the other story, because I'm pretty sure they would all be freaking out. So I guess that's cool. We'll play along with it. It's horrifically traumatizing. How are you guys feeling about the UNs? Kind of just kind of staring off on his face.
00:35:20
Speaker
Uh, yeah, I felt, I mean, whatever. It's just another one of them things, you know, I guess. Right. A thousand yards. I mean, if you're not feeling all right, Carter, you can talk to me. What? No, I see. You know, it was just awesome for anyone. I was saying, Matthew shot Sheriff Jeff. I was on, you know, it was a little hard to see. Also, he was kind of deserving of it too. He was being a, he was being a.
00:35:43
Speaker
I don't know if we were still in the confines of doodad on that train, but as you know dicks get shot around here So it's still around his arena. Yeah, that's fine. But anyway, you know, it was a whole lot of hoot nanny and we went on with but let's just go get some dynamite or explosives and okay, let's do that something something calm and normal for Sure Do they have a replacement wagon for them by chance or a
00:36:13
Speaker
Does she have to go find one? Are you asking me? Yes. There isn't much of a wagon. I mean, it's just the horses in the stable. So you might have to come up with something for that because, yeah, that was the only wagon y'all had that got fucked up. OK. Well, I guess we're going to have to go find us a new wagon because the other one's all fucked up.
00:36:41
Speaker
Um, do you guys know of any like, well, I don't know if we're going to be able to carry it though on the horses. So. You just take some wooden boards and like nail them together. But I don't think we really have the time for that right now, Maverick. So like, um, we might have to find like a wagon dealer or something. I'm just saying. How about this? You look for a wagon dealer and in the meantime, Kata and I.
00:37:10
Speaker
Stop building. Oh, and let's see who can get it faster. I don't remember. Maybe we just find a wagon out. I mean, there were a whole lot abandoned outside of town, but I don't know if they'd still be there. Well, hopefully, people came back for.
00:37:34
Speaker
Well, I don't know if they did because their horses are right here still. These are all the ones I saved. Wagons for sale, wagons! See? Look at me go. And he was excited about his competition, but I really want to get my hands dirty and calloused today. Rin's going to walk over to the gentleman calling for the wagons.
00:38:03
Speaker
Hello young lady, would you like to buy a wagon? Um, actually, yeah. Uh, I just need, I don't really need like a big one. Uh, it's just mostly for like, um, uh, transport of goods. So that's what the wagons are for. Yeah. Yeah. Not for like people or anything, but just for, just for goods. I sell you one for $95. Perfect. I'll take it.
00:38:31
Speaker
Okay. Have me $95 please. She gives him $95. And he gives you a fine handcrafted, uh, wagon, um, that he carved from, he whittled from wood. Um, it's about the size of your palm.
00:38:46
Speaker
And he says, now this is going to last you a long time. I worked very hard on it. And you're going to love it. No, no, that's not what I meant. She hands it back to him. Now give me back my money. That's not what I meant. No, the returns is no take backs. It's you.
00:39:03
Speaker
No, no, no, you knew what I meant, sir. That's not what I meant. You knew what I meant. Do you see any wagons around here except for what's on my table? I mean, like, what are you doing, crazy lady? Oh, fuck my life. You got you there, Ren. You didn't ask what you see. You're right about that, Katter. You're right about that.
00:39:29
Speaker
However, I did say what I needed it for, so... Well, I mean, like, wagons are for transport. Do you describe what wagons are for? I say, yes, that's what I have. You could put, like, some magic beans in there, or you could put maybe a small candle in there. You know, perhaps maybe some candy. She turns it at his face and walks the fuck away. Hey, hey, come on now. Come on, I'm a businessman.
00:39:57
Speaker
She's putting him off as she walks away. I go over and pick it up. I'm like, thank you, sir. Is that guy again? So now you have a tiny wagon. What do you do? Was that the bean guy? That was the bean guy. I don't recognize him. That's why she threw it at his face. So she's going to actually go look for some wagons for sale.
00:40:27
Speaker
I look at Wren, so who had a bad idea now? Shut up, Maverick. You wanted to build one. I don't think doodad would have like a wagon salesman. Like it's such a small town that you'd probably need to go out of town to go find a wagon. Um, because it's not a big place.
00:40:51
Speaker
Can I roll a notice roll to see if there is still an abandoned wagon outside of town where she found the horses and the puppy? I mean, you would have to go out of town to go, but sure. Yeah, you could do that. Yes. Go for it. Okay. So she's going to get on one of her horses that she saved and she's going to ride out of town in the direction that she found the abandoned horses.
00:41:16
Speaker
And wait, roll a notice roll. We'll say you roll like a quarter of a mile out to town. Ran, wait. Wow. Fuck. I got it too. I'm going to use a Benjamin. I never do this, guys. All right. Here we go. I got a four. You look around and you can see that
00:41:44
Speaker
There are like traces of wagon wheels and there are a couple and there's like a little tent next to one of them. Someone's camping out next to it because the horses were removed. Um, so that you could likely deduce rinse a smart last, uh, that that person probably couldn't move the wagon all the way back where it needs to go. Um, because the horse isn't there. Um, so yeah, you do see that.
00:42:14
Speaker
What do you do? She's gonna steal the wagon. You're gonna steal the wagon? Oh my, that's cool. Don't tell Maverick what you did. His whole thing is bounty hunting.
00:42:38
Speaker
It's really funny You're gonna hook hitch up whatever your horse's name is you're gonna hitch her up to the wagon mm-hmm Okay You do that and I'd say like guys you're getting on your horse and you're yeah, and you're getting away here and
00:43:01
Speaker
Oh, come on, not again. At least take me with you. That's the way I'm going. Uh, as you, as you flee with the wagon, um, and you see a man just like in his, in his givvies, just like standing out there in the hot, uh, the hot Montana sun, just like not sure what to do. Um, so yeah, so while Rin is concomitting grand wagon auto, uh, a great grand theft wagon, um, uh, we've got, uh, we've got cutter and Maverick.
00:43:31
Speaker
back in doodad what were you guys doing while you wait for her to do whatever she's doing is there something like a lumber mill or something in town where i can get some wood are you asking cutter or are you asking me i'm asking you as the like the god you're asking if there's a lumber mill in doodad
00:43:52
Speaker
or like something else where they were like store wood or something. I mean, like firewood and stuff. Yes, but not like to build. They probably export that or import that, I should say. So again, you're probably going to have to go elsewhere to get a wagon or to get lumber if you really want to build your own wagon. I honestly forgot about the wagon when you guys are going to get this question. It's kind of a funny side quest that you guys are doing because you don't have any choice.
00:44:23
Speaker
Well, dang, we don't got a wagon. Shit. I have another idea. How about we grab some axes and chop some crease? You want to just make your own lumber? Okay. Dude has pretty far away from the forest. I know that's the joke. I don't know. You've been saying some silly things. Uh, I don't know. I don't know.
00:44:53
Speaker
anymore. This day is sort of getting away from me here. And it just started. Yeah, and pulls up in a fucking with a wagon.

Logistics and Wagon Negotiations

00:45:05
Speaker
All right, guys, let's go. Don't worry about it.
00:45:17
Speaker
Did you say this is my worried face? I'm gonna take it back. Don't worry. I just borrowed it People is it own that thing? Yep I feel like we ought to get all these people there damn horses back. They're probably worried sick. I
00:45:39
Speaker
Yeah. I don't think it's fine. Don't worry about it. They're all in the stable to be found. Imagine they're like stranded in a desert. And they expect anybody to move fast. It'll be horrible. Well, the Funny Express saved the town. So I guess we've got something. So I guess, come on, let's go. It's a desk.
00:46:06
Speaker
We're owed one, now let's go. I cut a wagon. Cut her crosses as hard as like, I don't know, maybe this is the way you always been, but you feel like you're acting a little, I don't know, a little persnickety these days. I don't know, shut it up. You got pretty much sarsaparilla in your tank. I don't know, I feel like I'm feeling a little frisky. What a fun word.
00:46:37
Speaker
I don't know if, uh, when, when.
00:46:42
Speaker
fix me or whatever, if he messed with anything, but I feel great. I feel like I could take on the world and she's hopping around and punching at things and she's like, I could do things. Shadowboxing. Yeah, shadowboxing. How about we first go and look for those people that are stranded and then we go and get their dynamite or something?
00:47:08
Speaker
No, let's just get this done really fast and I'm going to take the man in the wagon back because I just borrowed it guys. So I told him I'd be right back and yeah, totally. That's what happened. And so yeah, we're just going to borrow it and then we're going to bring it back.
00:47:25
Speaker
Ryn, you gotta know you're playing with two lawful good characters here. I mean, you're right with a couple of lawful fellas here. That's what I mean. So I said I borrowed it, remember? She's fine. Ryn, this is making me feel uncomfortable. Well, that's why I gotta hurry because I gotta take it back to him because, you know, like... So I borrowed it. So we gotta go. I don't know.
00:47:55
Speaker
Listen, Jen's just going to be there waiting to get blown up. I feel like we got to coordinate with Sheriff Jeff on getting people to their belongings back and whatnot. This is a relief mission after a traumatic natural disaster. I mean, just bandits, but something crazy happened. Fine. I'll be by myself. She takes off. She takes off away from doing that? Yeah.
00:48:25
Speaker
Okay, she rides off away from you guys Just purchase it let's do like the good deeds together She has been a little sporadic she might blow us over that stuff, but well, I mean hey I mean We really do yeah
00:48:49
Speaker
All right. Well, let's, I don't know. Let's go find Jeff and I don't know how you coordinate getting people's horses back. I'll be like, Hey, is this your horse? Tell it. What's his name? Tell it to it. Yeah. See if he comes to you. Let's have, let's have him stand in the middle and then we'll call his name and whoever he walks to, that's who he goes to. Hairbud style. And I'm guessing from how you were saying Maverick seems like Ray went out and found the people whose horses she rounded up.
00:49:16
Speaker
And took his wife. So I got there. They must still be out there unless someone walked into town. We all figure out who, who came back and who stayed out. And you know, that's, yeah, that's probably a good idea. Like how that happened. That's why I never like gotten any sort of like leadership role. I said, Oh my goodness. Logistics. That's why let's go find Jeff. He's a sheriff. He'll figure his stuff out. Let's do that. You guys are heading to Sheriff Jeffrey's house or Sheriff Jeffrey's station. Yars.
00:49:44
Speaker
You see him in there and he's taking a nap at his desk. He's got his hat over his head. He's going, snore. Snore. I go there and I'm like, shh. I sneak over and I'm like, fire, fire. Oh, shit. He grabs his hat and he runs out the door and then comes back in and grabs his pot of coffee and then runs back out there. Guys, that's a fire station. Fire brigade, let's go. I'm just kidding you.
00:50:13
Speaker
Flyer yeah false alarm everybody. Nothing's on fire. Yeah set for my loins. Oh No, and I kind of spilled hot coffee on my picker just now. Oh, all right. Hey, hey Jeff Listen we was thinking We ought to get well last night when everybody was everybody got right. I guess people got round went up out in the out in the wilderness But I'm by them bandits they came through
00:50:43
Speaker
Oh yeah, fuck those guys. Hey, thanks y'all for the help, by the way. I don't know if I could've done it all my own. I know, that's a fun air gift. Uh, looks like, you know, since Ren was trying to help the animals be safe, uh, she has now perchained stranded some folks who maybe got dropped off by the bandits back where they found them. Oh, that's dang near, that's dang near lawless. Dang it, Ren. Is she here? Well, you know, she was trying to do right by the horse to buy the horses, you know. Okay.
00:51:12
Speaker
But anyway, do you have any info on like the people that are missing or like the horse that I'm missing? Frankly, I ain't got no goddamn idea what you're talking about. I didn't know there was people missing. That's what maybe I don't know. They might have came back, but walk back or the bayonet. Yeah, calm down there.
00:51:35
Speaker
Every time I just want to have a dog. It was a rough day yesterday. I just want to keep my feet up and drink my brew. That's what we feel too. We thought we was going to go do a nice, easy pick up some high explosives and take them to a place. You're doing what? He chokes on his coffee. You're going to get what now? Some bullshit job for mutton chops. Go. Right. Okay. Growing a city up.
00:52:01
Speaker
Oh yeah, as you do. Yeah, it does something that happens all the time. Sorry, destroyed. I mean, he just wants to tear all the stuff down in one sweep, I guess. I mean, I won't miss it, but that seems a bit of an extreme, even for me. I mean, it's already burnt down, so it's only like for cleaning purposes, really. Good thing, bowls, bowls, bowls came to do, dad. Yeah, way better here. We had nothing there.
00:52:27
Speaker
We need some help figuring out how to coordinate this whole thing here. All right, how about this? How about y'all grab your horses? I'll get mine. We'll just go maybe a mile or two outside of town, do a little circle around, see if we can find anybody and get their horse and then maybe we'll bring them back or something.
00:52:45
Speaker
That's not a good idea. Hey, that's good thinking. I slapped Maverick, so that's why we got to come to experts. Yeah, exactly. All right. Yeah. I got to get back in time to play dice with them kids. They seem like they got a good thing going and I want to get in on it. I'm going to win some money off those kids. I saw one of them had a nickel. All right. Let's go to get our horses. Let's do a touch of sleep.
00:53:11
Speaker
Justice League, what's a league? Like in the ocean? You know, like a group. Justice Group. Yeah, come on Justice Group, let's go! Justice Group. And I pull a fist in front of me, waiting for the others to put a fist there as well.
00:53:29
Speaker
Yeah, are you looking to fight right now? Bump. No. Oh, is that what I'm supposed to do? Oh, thank you. No. Oh, sorry. Got it. I'm catching up. I'm catching on. You guys are cool. Let's get our horses. So you guys get your horses and you get rid of the head out of doodad. Meanwhile, Rin is already out of doodad. You pass the guy in his underwear who is taking down his tent and putting on his clothes.
00:54:01
Speaker
Did you continue past him? Mm-hmm. I go to Grand Lake. You go westward to Grand Lake, you pass him up on the road. I would say the distance we can do that in Grand Lake is probably maybe like, I don't know, like maybe like a 45-minute ride if you don't stop. So we'll say that you're just continuing straight there. Mm-hmm.
00:54:29
Speaker
Okay, so for it is just she leaves that guy in the heat as she blasts past them and Yeah, I would say that You you do that you make it there We'll just do a quick time jump for your particular part of the story you make it a Grand Lake It is a Grand Lake. It's not the biggest lake of Montana, but it is quite a nice Grand Lake and
00:54:53
Speaker
And you see it's a lot of foliage kind of growing around the area. You see there are like a couple of small, small signs of point like east of Dudad north to Jensen. You know, and you see that there are like a couple of tents of like people who are kind of camping out by the lake. And you can see that there is in fact a large wagon.
00:55:16
Speaker
filled with crates, like almost to the brim, um, uh, next to one of the tents, uh, and a guy who's kind of like taking down his tent, putting it up. Uh, he's probably like bright blonde hair, maybe like average height, wearing like kind of brown leather pants. Uh, and he kind of looks over and he kind of does a little spittoon at the side of his mouth and he goes, ma'am. How's it going? Oh, uh, going. Uh, I mean,
00:55:44
Speaker
I'm going to take down my tent. Uh, but yeah, that's what's going with how I never heard that speak before. How, how is it going for with on you? You know, going good. Um, so I'm here to pick up those from you to take to Jensen.
00:56:08
Speaker
Oh, you want all this nitrous right here? Nitroglycerin? Yeah, yes. Oh, you guys ordered this? I mean, this is, uh, ma'am, this is, uh, I mean, this is highly volatile. Do you know how hard it was for me to get it here without blowing myself up?
00:56:22
Speaker
I'm sure um so like do you just want to like switch wagons and like you could just like drop this off at my buddy just outside of town for me you know and then that way you don't have to worry about that wagon and then you know we don't have to worry about unpacking it and see like I thought I needed one so like I borrowed it from my friend just outside town and then you know turns out I might not have to what do you think
00:56:51
Speaker
Ma'am, ma'am, are you getting red in the face or something? Cause like you were just talking so fast just a second ago. Um, are you all right? You, you got some heat stroke or something. Do you need to sit in a tent? Are you okay? I'm fine. I'm good. No, I'm fine. Yep. I'm good. What's, what's, what's going on with your, uh, what's that on your back there? And what's that sticking out of your sleeve there?
00:57:16
Speaker
Oh, I'm just like, you know, I've got like a water tank that keeps me alive and you know, I'm like part robot. It's fine. Don't worry about it. That I didn't understand most of that sentence. It's like y'all were speaking American or something. Um, so you know what? I mean, I suppose if you really need to.
00:57:39
Speaker
I mean, I really like this wagon. I've had it a long time. Well, I can bring it back to you if you want. Like we can meet back here and then, you know, you could do that favor for me and take that this wagon to my buddy outside town. And then that way, you know, I can return that without having to make too many trips. And then I can just meet you back here with this wagon once it's all unloaded. What do you think?
00:58:05
Speaker
I don't know miss that's uh, I mean that's that's a lot of extra work for me on account of my job is bring it here You unload it take it with you and then I go continue I got other stock in the back of this wagon ma'am. So it's not just It's not all not your glycerin. I got other stuff. I got to go deliver still and I've been waiting here I mean I was getting ready to pack up and leave and just call it. I've been here for what three days and
00:58:28
Speaker
Sure. Well, how about we just switch wagons? How's the sound? We switch wagons. You put the other delivery into this wagon and then we can meet and do dad and I'll bring you your wagon. Ma'am, why are you so obsessed with taking my wagon?
00:58:49
Speaker
I just, you know, I figure I don't want to have to spend the time to unload it and reload it and then unload it again. So like, you know, we could take your stuff out of this one, put it in that one. You can drop that stuff off and then I can meet you somewhere else with this one. Well, once I'm done unloading it.
00:59:13
Speaker
He kind of rubs his palms together a little bit. He says, how about this? How about you just pay me for the time that you're going to have my wagon on account? It's a far superior one than the one that you're driving. And then, uh, that way, if there are any damages along the way, you know, I still got some recompense for the fact that I ain't got the thing that makes me money. I mean, how much do you want for it? Well, how long do you think it's going to take for y'all to deliver this to, to wherever it is you're taking it and bring it back to me?
00:59:42
Speaker
Like an hour. You think it's only going to take you an hour? Yeah. All right. If you think you can get back here in an hour, I'm going to go double on that just in case you're running late. So how about 150 bucks for two hours? Okay. You got 150 bucks? Uh-huh. That's a lot of money there, miss. I know. I run a brothel in town. How much money does Ren actually have on her bag right now? $335.
01:00:12
Speaker
It's $335. Who gave you that? Was that from Lady Danes? I always forget how much money it was. I'm still riding on what Lady Danes gave me. Oh, I'm sorry. 355. She gave me like 100 at some point. Yeah. That's a lot of money. All right. Well, all right. Well, 150 ducks. That's right. That's what I call them. 150 ducks. And they're all the wagons yours for the next two hours, ma'am. Thank you.
01:00:38
Speaker
All right. Uh, so if you give him 150 bucks, he'll move his stuff into your wagon, um, on the, on the pretense that you will bring his wagon back so he can continue to keep using it. Cause he's losing money. Um, okay. So he, he does that. You, you, you have his wagon. Um, and, uh, so yeah, so you, um, you

Rescuing Stranded Townsfolk

01:01:00
Speaker
do that. And so while we're doing that cutter and Maverick, you guys are back in do dad, uh, well getting ready to leave, do dad.
01:01:07
Speaker
So you go and chirp, chirp. My brain don't do words today. Go and check. You're going to church. You're going to church. You're going to church first. And then, then you go to Sinners Canyon, not Sinners Canyon. I'm looking at the wrong part of the map again. Fuck, where are you guys going? You're going outside to do that. Jesus Christ, my brain. To look like for any people that are like without the horses and stuff.
01:01:32
Speaker
Yeah, y'all y'all man, my brain just feels like it is made of pudding. Let's read it. You're going outside of you dad to look for people. There we go. Yeah So do that cutter. What are you? What do you what do you do, sir? My ride the trails and go hey anybody lost out here my stuck without a horse. Yeah Well that yeah, yeah over here. Oh, hey. Oh, I'm coming over
01:01:55
Speaker
going. What was what was what's going on? See him. You see him. You see a man. You see a man who's got like a shirt half buttoned up, his pants are up. He's only got one on one shoe and it's like a half of a tent, like taking apart.
01:02:10
Speaker
He's like, somebody just come and took my, took my, took my wagon. And before that, someone had stolen my horse and I'm feeling I'm going to die a heat stroke out here. Come on, fella, they take your shoes too. No, I just can't find my other shoe. Oh, hell man. Well, hey, listen, uh, as far as your horse goes last night, um, when everybody got, you know, those bandits rolled through and picked you up off the road, I guess. Um, and then put you right back where they found you. Um,
01:02:35
Speaker
Uh, when you were gone, my friends, uh, saw your horse out here and was all known as horse by itself. Brought it back, which I mean, to be fair, I guess horse can just eat the grass and be fine. But she was trying to do right by the horses. So she brought them back to town and we try to fan out where everybody's at. Uh, since this whole crazy thing happened last night with them bandits. Um, so yeah, I guess I can only take one bag at a time to hop on the back of your feller and I'll get you into town there. What about all my belongings and stuff? I will have to come back for those feller. Um,
01:03:05
Speaker
Sorry about your wagon. I think that might be, I'm going to be straight with you, Phil. That might be my friend too. She might be a little misguided. She's trying to get something done. And she's just a little, I don't know. Well, she done, she done just rode it past me a second time away from Dudad. She rode it past me and I think she flipped me off on the way past. Yeah, she's a little, I don't know what you want to call it, but yeah, that's why I didn't want to
01:03:32
Speaker
Part of her part of reason why I don't want to partake in using the wagon with her cuz I figured I don't know Which way she went stole it from you or borrowed it. Sorry, but I don't want to drive past should be very awkward But also I didn't feel right doing it. But anyway, hop on up on here and Get me up I mean, okay, I suppose just so I can get some more water in my canteen Yeah, she's she'd run a road past towards Grand Lake
01:04:00
Speaker
Oh yeah, that's where we got some work we trying to do out that way and she's just you know Apparently once she tells somebody she'll do something. She's gonna have to I gotta do it no matter what the cost is But uh, yeah here have some wild water fella reach your town. Help me find your horses at least I'm nom nom nom nom nom nom. Oh, thank you so much. I really needed that. I know When we go, let's get your back feller You turn around you take them back to
01:04:29
Speaker
You take him back to to do dad. OK, Maverick. Well, that's he's doing that. You circle around as well, trying to find any missing people. Yeah. Anybody lost around here? Yeah. Who's that? The guy taking a whiz in the woods. He goes over here, failure. Oh, hi. You lost. I mean, lost is a weird word, more so like. I don't know where I am.
01:04:59
Speaker
Yes, that's pretty lost. Oh, is that what loss means? Oh, I thought it was just like, no, I guess that's the same thing in it. Yeah. Do you want to go to do that or where's your destination? Uh, you know, I just go to whatever town will take me to be honest with you. I just been kind of Roman, uh, you know, on account of my horse got taken. So, um, we got some like courts that like, uh, I also kind of threatened to do that. Like last night, maybe like USSR among them.
01:05:30
Speaker
Why would my horse be all the way up in Dudan? Is that where I am? What was that? Is that where I am? Am I near Dudan? You're near Dudan, yes. Oh, dang. I was on my way to Ghost Alley. What am I doing in Dudan? I don't know, but... Boy, the sun's hot. That's like a near sunflower, and your horse might be there. Well, Filler, I don't have any reason to deny your help right now, and it's hot.
01:05:56
Speaker
And my pee is very yellow on a kind of dehydration. I can take you back if you want. I suppose, you know, but just don't get any funny ideas when I hop on the back of your horse now. That's fine. I'm going to trust with your person. Trust when you need to tell people.
01:06:18
Speaker
Okay, I mean I can see from your bounty badge there that, you know, you're probably one of the more trustworthy folks to come out here and approach a stranger. But don't just trust anyone, but I'm a good person.
01:06:29
Speaker
Got conflicting words there partner, but I mean you got the badge. I'm just gonna go ahead Don't worry, I'm not a serial killer guy trust anyone but trust me I'm not one of those guy. Yeah As he as you ride with him back to do dad he kind of whispers he goes Mr. I just want you to know I know you're a bounty hunter and I don't know if anybody's gonna squeal on me or not one time I
01:06:59
Speaker
You know, I don't took a I don't took a piss on somebody else's property and I don't know if there's a fine for that or anything But I just want to come clean now that way if somebody doesn't tells on me, I don't want you come and find me later I mean that doesn't really concern me But if you really want to you can go to church and like tell a priest about it. Oh Just do dad have a church. I thought that thing was is not the place it got turned into a whore house. Oh
01:07:22
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. So you just go to the brothel and tell the lady that it cooks what like your sins are. Oh, hell, if I get to go to a whorehouse and get food, take me to church, my friend.
01:07:41
Speaker
So yeah, you pick up this fella you take him back to do dad Sheriff Jeff Finds himself a lady out in the wilderness and brings her back
01:07:55
Speaker
It's exactly like that anything he picks her up off the horse and carries her into the sheriff's office He shuts the door with his foot we help true love heaven, I guess we'll go keep helping folks You folks just had it goes there's like lipstick marks all like over his face and he goes I mean, I'm sure there's no more than three out there guys. You're probably fine Probably. Yeah, how many people could that be? It's where counties or well
01:08:26
Speaker
Yes, folks had wagons, man. More than one horse. Anyway, come on there, fellow, with one shoe. Let's get your horse. Oh, yeah. There's my horse, Salacious D. Where you been? Oh, my God. I missed you so much. I'm like, oh, look, it worked, too. He said name and it came to him. It's working. Yeah, Salacious D comes out. Salacious D comes out and nuzzles their nose against.
01:08:52
Speaker
against the guy and he hops up and goes, let's go get my stuff and go find that, that, that B word that stole my wagon. Hold on there, AFL. We'll try and sort that out for you. Yeah. Better not approach her alone. Yeah. Is she armed and dangerous? She can be. Yeah. Okay. Well, you know what? You talked me out of it.
01:09:18
Speaker
Sell full steam these days. I don't know but maybe just stay in duty for a while and then we'll get it all sorted out Go ahead. Yeah, go over there at the brothel. Tell them tell them cutter Maverick and Rin sent you and You just need a place to lay up for a couple day. He was in trouble out in the wilderness Okay, hey y'all got any money. You're like a fiver I can borrow
01:09:40
Speaker
Well, yeah, sure fellow. I mean, I'll probably forget to ask Jeffy there for some goulash. And so we sent you, I mean, you're just in need. There you go. Have a five or five for me. Have a tenor even. Oh, I, I sincerely for, oh my God, damn. How you got so many? Wow. That's a lot of dough. How are you just carrying this around with you? Yeah, actually I got to get some of this stuff off of me. We did a job before a bunch of crazy stuff happened to us with, with the bandits and whatnot that, you know, about that. Um, and, uh, yeah. Bandits? Hardworking. What? Yeah.
01:10:11
Speaker
What are y'all talking about? I didn't see no bandits. Except for the one that done stole my wagon just now. Well, what happened to you last night, Dan Feller? Oh, well, I mean, I got, I'm not gonna lie. I finished the rest of my whiskey at camp. You know, and then I took the wagon out. I was trying to bring it back here to do, Dad, so I can get a hotel. But then y'all got really sleepy, and so I just built my tent on the side of the road to take a quick little nap.
01:10:39
Speaker
And then when I woke, the horse was gone, which was quite funny. And then I saw a little red man and he was telling me that I should just go back to sleep. And so I did. And then I woke up and then I saw a lady take my wagon. And I was like, well, that fucking sucks. That's the best morning. Um, yep. Uh, yeah. Well, there was a lot of misunderstandings that went on last night, but, um, that's a weird dreamy hat feller. Anyway, see a little red man too, mister?
01:11:09
Speaker
Uh, no, uh, unless you talk about a native American, which I don't think they like to be called that. So be careful with that. Um, no, this was like a little red. It looked like a little baby, but he was standing up all on his own and his neck wasn't all floppy, like a newborn's ears. And then he was like, go to sleep, mister. And I said, okay. And then I went to sleep. Wow. Yeah. That's a stress of strange. Uh, that's one of those dreams where you'll think you wake up, but you really don't. That's one of that's weird ones, feller.
01:11:37
Speaker
Yeah, that's why you don't drink. You had a dream, you died? Yes. You're telling me you had too much whiskey too, Maverick. I'm like looking at the guy like, wear it like a shitty play. I'm like, yeah, right.
01:11:59
Speaker
Too much to drink that night as well when you had that funny dream that you had right? Oh, yeah Yeah, but but that's what it was too much cooler. Yes, too much Yeah, you know that could have been it too you know I was trying out some different different routes out here to survive and I also had a Had a some warm whiskey which you know to me sometimes affects the brain a little differently than cold whiskey, right? You know, sometimes I like to cool mine off you guys like to cool off your whiskey. Is that weird? No
01:12:28
Speaker
A lot of things hit the whistle better when they're cool. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's one delicious little ice cube just floating in there. Just like sometimes I like to play a little game where I like to use my tongue to push the ice cube to different sides of the cup until it melts. All right, well, go on over there. Get yourself some rest, feller. All right. The sign says, it says,
01:12:57
Speaker
I wonder whether, I guess a T would have been at the matching part. I don't know. Yeah, it says matching carpets, more or less. Yeah, matching carpets. Machine carpets. Yeah. I wonder where we're at. I guess there's a T still not up there. I mean, it's probably somewhere discarded, but I don't know if you guys put it back up or not. We have a finite Jesus team, Eric. We never like. Yeah. I mean, who is that got the T back?
01:13:28
Speaker
Anywho, be safe there, feller, buy yourself a pair of shoes, or a new one shoe.

Wagon Pursuit and Explosive Transport

01:13:33
Speaker
All right, and if you catch the lady that got my wagon, my money's in there. My guns are in there, my livelihood's in there. Oh, damn. Well, yeah, we're trying to sort it all out. I'm like rubbing my forehead.
01:13:52
Speaker
Rins getting off on being a troll all of a sudden. Are there any more horses left after we get those people, their horses back? You know what, aside from the one of the lady that went into the share station with Sheriff Jeff, no, there was just three extra horses in the stables. Convenient. All right.
01:14:14
Speaker
I guess we ought to mount up and ride over to that lake and see what she's doing in that feller's wagon. Geez Louise. Shouldn't we head to Jensen's and see if she's on her way there? I mean, well, from what I'm recollecting, Jensen's pretty much north of that place. Well, we ought to ride over there and see if she's still there. I don't know how much of that stuff they're loading might take them a while. That's also true. Got to move that feller's stuff all around in the wagon too. It's going to take them time.
01:14:46
Speaker
Um, yeah, let's ride in the direction of the lake and maybe we'll like see her across the way. Yeah. Let's do that. You guys ride towards Grand Lake. Yeah. Meanwhile, uh, Ren has dropped 150 smack rooms to, uh, to this fella to take his cart and for him to put his stuff on the one that she stole. Um, which is going to get this guy in trouble if he ends up getting caught by the law. Cause he's got someone else's wagon.
01:15:16
Speaker
Um, but, uh, and so Ren, you have, uh, we didn't plan that at all. No, hey, listen, Adam knew what you were doing. I was like, man, she's really persistent. She's trying to frame this dude for stealing a wagon.
01:15:37
Speaker
She's like, yeah, so just give me the wagon and I'll go. Just give me your wagon. Just give me your wagon, guy. So she got this wagon. It's got probably about 16 crates of nitrous bottles in it that are all just kind of separated by wooden slats inside the boxes.
01:15:58
Speaker
And, uh, you can make your way towards Jensen. So I'm going to have you do a couple of rolls because you have a lot of high explosives in that. And back in the day, that shit, I don't know about now, but I know back then it didn't take a whole lot to cause some shit for that. So, um, for that to potentially go off if it gets ignited. So let's have, let's have Ren do a couple of rolls, uh, to see how well she does. Okay. Let's see an explosion and then we'll never find Ren again.
01:16:28
Speaker
Yeah. So, uh, let's try right. Riding roles or horse riding roles. Okay. Uh, so let's have one role. That's a four. Um, uh, so you, uh, you go slowly enough that just, uh, the, your horse, um, I'm guessing you hit your own horse to his wagon and vice versa. Uh-huh.
01:16:57
Speaker
And, uh, yeah, you hear the bottle slowly, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting in the back. As you, uh, slowly make your way towards, uh, Jensen, um, you start to hit a few bumps. Um, so you know what, let's, let's have you roll a D six. And if you roll above a D six, uh, above a three, a three or four or five, six, then you'll still find some smooth terrain. If it's below that a three to one, then you're going to hit some bumpy terrain. It's going to be harder to continue your journey.
01:17:26
Speaker
You rolled a two. You're gonna hit some bumps. We're gonna have you roll another riding roll.
01:17:37
Speaker
But it's going to be at a minus one as you are hitting some bumps, some steep hills on the way up. Oh, no. That's a two. You do have another Benjamin left if you want to use it. I do. I'm going to use it. Okay. Well, technically, that's a one because it's at a minus one. There you go. You got a 15 minus one. That's a 14.
01:18:02
Speaker
You start the falter for a second. The wagon looks like it's going to get stuck. I like to play Benny's as if like you're you correct the mistake before it happens. So like you like just as like you can see like, oh, shit, this wagon is going to start to tilt. You use your good, your metal arm and pull, pull the reins a bit to the right and then you avoid catastrophe. Roll one more D6 followed by one more riding roll. And if you pass those and you make it to Jensen to make the delivery.
01:18:29
Speaker
And you've done it. That's a one. That's another bumpy drain. Wow. Good job. Well done. So you make it. I was going to say, I really don't want this to be how Rin goes out. It would be funny. I stole your wagon.
01:18:59
Speaker
Let me just plant the metal arm and hope it grows a written tree. So yeah, once again, you hit some bumpy terrain, but you managed to, you know, at this point, you and your horse are like on the same wavelength, and you guys guide the wagon safely to what remains of Jensen.
01:19:19
Speaker
You don't see anybody outside right away. You see like, again, there's like in the aftermath of what you all left behind in the wake of your riot that you pretty much incited. There are a lot of buildings that look like they are dilapidated or a lot of glass that is broken. A lot of scorched buildings everywhere you can see. A lot of looting happened here. And it's pretty much a ghost town. Like no one, no one's here that you can see.
01:19:48
Speaker
Is there a tea left on the church?
01:19:52
Speaker
Is, is there a T left on the church? Um, sure. It's just, I mean, why would there be, oh, you mean like an actual cross? No, yeah, I meant like a cross, but I'm being, I'm being hilarious about it. Do I know how to spell church? C-I-C-H-I-R-C-H-T, right? It's almost like birch, right?
01:20:26
Speaker
Yes, there's a T on the church. There's like a little yellow one that's on the church. I'll just keep that in the back of my mind for later. Okay, and as you're riding through, you see a feller kind of step outside of
01:20:43
Speaker
Um, what's left of the saloon. Uh, you see that there's a, there is a, there is a, uh, a wagon and a horse tied to a hitch there, uh, at the saloon as you ride through town. Um, let me see a guy kind of come stumbling out a little bit and he goes, Hey, Hey, Hey, I know the smell of nitrous anywhere. Not just glycerin nitrous. Hey, Hey, is that for me? I've been waiting here for days. I bought, I bought cleaned out this place and I'll go lie. Are you Todd?
01:21:12
Speaker
Spiny Todd, that's what they call me. Oh, well, yep, this is for you then. Oh, shit. Well, it's about damn time. Yeah, I'm sorry. We had some shit happen in town at doodad and we had to take care of some bandits that came in trying to kidnap adults and shit. And so, you know, we had to take care of it. But don't worry. I'm here now. Yeah.
01:21:37
Speaker
Hey, whatever you say, darling, uh, I could not give two shits except for the ones that I have been leaving all over this town. So, um, rightfully so. This place is a shithole. Oh yeah, it sure is. I got, uh, I got big plans. Oh, it's going to be great. Yeah. Anyways. Um, uh, all right. Well, your company's been paid already. So, uh, I guess I'll just, you know, give you a bid you a due, I suppose.
01:22:08
Speaker
Do you, well, I guess here, I'll just unhook this wagon here for you. And do you have another wagon? No, I'm just going to put it in my wagon. What kind of business is this? Just help me unload it and put it in my wagon. What's wrong with y'all? Fucking weird ass business ethics at the phone express. Jesus Christ, put it in the back of the wagon and let me go.
01:22:37
Speaker
Are you Are you the guy that has wagons? God just like handed to me for fuck's sake. It'll take us like five minutes
01:22:55
Speaker
Oh my god here Jesus Christ Shit if I didn't already take a shit in that church, I would go pray for you right now, please don't though. Oh My god and like five minutes lay down and then oh look look at that now We're all loaded up in my wagon now. You gotta take my way again you fucking fruit You fruit basket
01:23:22
Speaker
Nothing. I figured it would be easier. Fine. God, such a buzzkill. You think it's easier? It takes me longer to unhitch my horse and re-hitch him, get him in the right place and hitch into another wagon. It takes way fucking longer. Buzzkill. Fine. Bye. She rides away. And as she rides out of Jensen, she grabs the cross from the church. You should grab the tea. Yeah, take out the tea.
01:23:52
Speaker
It singes just a little bit because you're being a piece of shit. Yes, you hold it. So so you do that. And you ride back towards do that, I presume. Or no, or towards Grand Lake. Do you do you plan to give the guy his wagon back? I thought I was meeting him back in do that. No, he wants you to bring it back to where he was.
01:24:23
Speaker
God, he'd be pissed if you go to do that. He's like, that chick ain't coming back. She's going to go back to Grand Lake and give him his wagon back, but she's going to switch the T over to her other way. OK, so we'll just say that you do that. We don't have to act that part out. We'll just say that you got that all done. Maverick and Cutter, you guys are making your way towards Grand Lake, right?
01:24:47
Speaker
Yeah, I'll say that since she fucked around with the with Spiny Todd and then made their way towards then she made her way back towards Grand Lake to meet up with the feller that she picked up the stuff from.
01:25:04
Speaker
I'd say that you guys probably see her bringing a wagon back towards Grand Lake and she's kind of still talking to the feller about, you know, changing wagons yet again. So now they have to hitch their horses back to the wagon that they had originally. So they're in the middle of doing that when you guys show up. Yep. I have caught you right handed. Oh, Renwell, which one of these damn wagons is the one you stole from that damn man without no shoe? I don't know what you're talking about. He has that wagon.
01:25:35
Speaker
Ren, enough of this malarkey. Sir, what the hell? Whose wagon is what, where, and when, and why? Are you all with the Phony Express that were supposed to come pick up the explosives? Hi. We all are late, but I already talked to your lady here. I don't know why, but she was very insistent on taking my wagon, but I made a cool 150 bucks off it, or 150 ducks as I like to say.
01:26:04
Speaker
She took my wagon and I hitched my, you know, I didn't even hitched my horse to this wagon because like, I'm not going to take it anywhere. And then she went and delivered the goods with my wagon instead of hers for some goddamn reason. And then now I'm hitching my horse back up to my wagon and she can hit your horse back up to her wagon that she brought here and then traded with me. And does that all make sense? It was very weird. She was very insistent on taking my wagon. Why didn't you waste all of her money?
01:26:30
Speaker
Uh, cause I needed the wagon and I didn't want to have to like, unload the wagon and then reload the wagon and then unload the wagon again. It was just easier. And so, yeah, but he's got his wagon back. Oh my God, freaking out. So I guess, yeah, I gotta go get this other wagon back to my friend that I borrowed it from.
01:26:57
Speaker
You know, yeah, that's we do gonna get he's back in town We like I'm rubbing my hands my temples That's cool. I mean at least he got back to town at some point. I'll just drop this Where's he staying I was real for you. I suppose he got back to town Yeah, he said he said he managed to find himself to do magic carpets to get some food. I
01:27:25
Speaker
Cool. Well, that means that I can pay him back for letting me borrow his wagon. Sweet. You also got to repair the tee in matching carpets. I got that on top of that, guys, because I stole the one from Jensen's shirt. She points to the back of the wagon. That's actually a pretty idea to put that cross stand set of a tee.
01:27:55
Speaker
Well, I mean, it was going to get blown up anyways, and I figured might as well replace the tea that got taken away or broken, you know, when we were fighting that one guy. So I figured, you know, get two birds stoned at once. Mm hmm. Yeah. Yep. All right. Well, hop on the boxer and drive that thing back to do that with us. Come on. Roger Dodger.
01:28:24
Speaker
She gets back on police So you guys are heading back towards Towards do dad then do dad. Yeah, we're doing that All right, you guys reunite at Grand Lake you turn around the guy goes. Thanks for the thanks for the hundred and fifty ducks, ma'am Business doing pleasure with you Yeah, yeah, yeah
01:28:51
Speaker
Um, and, uh, he hops up upon his horse and then, um, rides off. Yeah. He despawns. Yeah. He, uh, yeah, he D renders. He does. He's not needed on the scene anymore. Um, and then, uh, yeah, he's gone. Um, he's, he's tucked into the, uh, the dev rooms for future use. Um,
01:29:14
Speaker
So, uh, you guys make your way back towards do dad and I'd say that you all have been riding for, you know, you know, a good 30, 40 ish

Explosive Events and Aftermath

01:29:23
Speaker
minutes. You're almost to do dad. You, as you, as do dad crest over the horizon, you hear a loud massive explosion, like a ridiculous amount. And you can see off in the, um,
01:29:38
Speaker
Off over the horizon, far, far off, past the hills, you can see how the mountain range that runs from the west of Montana almost to the center of Montana. You can see that a large explosion happens over by the mountain range. And often, at distance, you can see some rock star tumble. And yeah, that's what you see. And here. Bye-bye, Jensen.
01:30:08
Speaker
It looks like it was up by the mountain range that it was blown up, which is farther north than Jensen. Yeah. You think we should look at that? I'm sure we'll have to, man.
01:30:31
Speaker
Sure, we'll have to. Yeah, so do you want to just you're already at doo, dad, you want to just go to doo, dad? I mean, what's the time? What time do you want it to be? Because if it's night, I will prefer to first rest and then go there. You know what? Roll a D6. If it's a four or higher, it's still daytime. It's a one to three. It's getting lower. Roll a D12 and it's actually a time of the clock.
01:30:59
Speaker
Oh, that's a good. Oh, that's a better idea. Do that instead. We somehow got to 1 a.m. It's going to be crazy. Roll a D 24 1 p.m. I guess. It's 7. It's 7 p.m. So the sun is going down. It's not quite totally nighttime yet, but it's getting there. You're going in now or like check it out tomorrow. Hey, I'm going back to bed. Never. We got out there. We nighttime by the time we get there. It's a whole damn thing.
01:31:29
Speaker
Okay, let's eat our dinner goulash and then hit the sack. Uh, so you guys go and have your dinner goulash. Lunch goulash, dinner goulash, snack goulash. Um, I say, and Ryan, why don't you go make, uh, make sure that feller gets his wagon. I'm going to go make sure butter nut and all the horses of ours is okay. And a stable over there. Um, meet you guys already on it.
01:31:58
Speaker
So so you go and take care of the horses. Ren, you go and you see the guy at the brothel. And you know what? He's three sheets to the wind at this point. He barely remembers you. So he's just like, well, man, I saw some some metal man take my horse and buggy. What is it today? Earlier in my life?
01:32:28
Speaker
So well, I think it's back now. I think I found it outside the brothel. There was just a random wagon just left outside the front here. So that might be yours. Well, we'll be by howdy. I hope my money and my guns and my livelihood still in there. Might be. Go check it out. You know what? When I am done with this cup.
01:32:55
Speaker
Uh, you know, cause I just put a fresh ice cube in here and I gotta like tickle it around the ice, the, the, the cup until it's until it melts. Sure. All right. Well, hey, thank you for letting me know, but I'm going to go back to licking the ice now.
01:33:17
Speaker
Oh, I will. Sucky, you got next. Oh, yes. I'm very excited to do some ice licking. Let's go to Maverick. Maverick, what are you doing? I want to go outside and see if there's still the kids like playing with their dice.
01:33:36
Speaker
Uh, yes, but now you see that they are all crap. There's, they have like a little round table out in the street, like, like over towards like one of the porches and they're all standing around it. And you see the one kid kind of has like a couple, like little thin wooden slats that kind of separates him from everybody else. And Sheriff Jeff is sitting on a rocking chair nearby and he goes, and the kid goes, the kid goes, all right, you guys walk into a cave and you hear the sound of heavy breathing, uh,
01:34:06
Speaker
Then Sheriff Jeff goes, I want to investigate. And then he goes, roll the roll the investigation check. And then he goes, All right, hang on. Come on, big money, big money. God damn it. I wrote a one. And that's what you play. What do you mean? Why are we playing? We're playing dice. The game you talk to kids out of play. I mean, that's quite what I told them. But that sounds interesting. How does the game go?
01:34:36
Speaker
Well, like they were like, I got it. So you said we should add rules and about points, but then we were competing and it started to feel really like we were going to get, not be friends. So I thought, well, why don't we do something that makes us a team? And then we thought of the phony express and how cool they were. And so we started making the dice, make us do cool stuff like you. And the one, the one girl goes, I'm kind of a tool.
01:35:02
Speaker
You see one you see one kids got like his arm like tucked up in his shirt and a stick sticking out of it goes I'm Rynn Accurate patration there. Yeah, I need water. Oh, I need more water. I am getting dry And then he sees Sheriff Jeff Sheriff Jeff pretends to pour like a cup on his back. There you go, ma'am Oh, thank you. Sheriff Jeff. I'm playing Sheriff Jeff. Oh
01:35:27
Speaker
I thought immediately I'm playing Maverick. Yeah. I wanted to be Maverick, but this kid I already called dibs. And they told me to play Ishi, but I ain't being no bird. I pointed at a child that's like playing me. I want you to give me the best Maverick impression you have. And he's like, he's one of the kind of an older kid. He looks like he's probably like 12 or 13 years old. And he goes, all right. I'm Maverick.
01:35:56
Speaker
That's perfect. You're hired. I knew it. And he says, he pulls out a guitar, and she can catch in the jail. And you can't copyright me, Spotify, because that's mine. So do you want to do you want to sit down and play with the kids? We have like one more spot for me to play as well.
01:36:23
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Come on. You can actually be Sheriff Jeff if you want. I got to go take a massive dookie. OK, that sounds good. Yeah. All right. I want to hear your best Sheriff Jeff impression. Go. I'm Sheriff Jeff and I drink coffee. Whoa, my God. It was like I was hearing my own voice from the telephone or something. Oh, my God. Right. God damn it. God. Yes. Can you say God damn it? Damn it. You got to have more gravel in your voice whenever. Come on.
01:36:50
Speaker
You know, I'm not really good at this whole voice thing. You know what? The kids were telling me that, like, it's not the voices, it's the character. Yeah, yeah. All right. Anyway, I got to go see how that lady's doing, too. I didn't catch her name. I think I think I fucked her into a coma. What? What? He runs off back to the sheriff's office. I like, look at the children. Should I be concerned?
01:37:18
Speaker
What? Did he did a naughty thing to a weighty? I think he did a naughty thing, yes. Yeah, but my mommy tells me that adults do that all the time. Yeah, but in life, too much of any good thing can be a bad thing. Yeah, I know. That's why you told me not to say damn or dang. Oh, no, my mouth is getting looser. Oh, no. You gotta find some glue to glue it on again. Oh, no. Glue, she can eat glue.
01:37:50
Speaker
Uh, so Maverick sits down and plays this game with the kids. Um, cutter, what are you doing? Um, I do give a little quick check on horses or put them away or whatever.

Confrontations and Trouble Brewing

01:38:01
Speaker
And then I go, um, up to, uh, Pony express and I knock on the door. Uh, what? Uh, I open the door and I close it behind me. Joe, who the hell are you making deals with here, feller? Uh, what are you talking about?
01:38:20
Speaker
This fella who said to you, he's going to blow up Jensen, rebuild it. I'm pretty sure he just blew a damn mountain up or something, something I seen over the hillside there. Oh, uh, I mean, I don't know. I just, I just take the deals, uh, to make us money. Whatever they want to do with it is, uh, their own business. Well, listen, I ain't doing nothing involves nothing like this. Never again. We can take a plate, some medicine to a place where people are going to try and eat us. It's fine. And whatever else we did before.
01:38:50
Speaker
Uh, this one pissed me off, Jerry Joe. I'm pretty sure there's something really bad that's happened over there. I don't know. Uh, yeah, you're probably right, but, uh, I just know that, uh, I'm looking out for you guys and, uh, who knows? Maybe this is what you need.
01:39:15
Speaker
Alright, I'll leave. Alright, you leave. I'd say, do you just go turn in for the night with Bathie? Yeah. Alright, you go tune in. She asks you if you want to continue working on reading and stuff like that before you guys go to bed. I'm sorry, I don't got the energy for it tonight. It's been a long few days here. Oh, it's okay. I'll just read you another story and then we'll go to sleep. Alright.
01:39:45
Speaker
Did you read one about that ugly duckling again? That one makes me feel good inside. Yeah, I was kind of sad at first, but then, but then, you know, he turns out to be, you know, accepted. That's nice, huh? Moral story is, yeah. I mean, once you, you gotta get pretty and everybody will like you. I like that sort of nice sentiment there. It's okay. I mean, you got, you got pretty when you came to do dad.
01:40:09
Speaker
Yeah, that's what happened to me. Everybody thought I was sort of, you know, a big old blockhead and I put this nice facial hair on everybody. Why'd I go all right? Give myself a couple. I also bet I gotta say, if it comes to you, I took a lot more baths when I started coming here for whatever reason. Well, you know, I take great pride in my work and, uh, you know, it, uh, it was always a pleasure to make sure that you were squeaky clean just so you could get dirty again. Yeah.
01:40:36
Speaker
Anyway, let's crack that old book open. Let's crack them pages open, you know what I'm saying?
01:40:48
Speaker
Um, and so the night passes you guys, um, you guys end up, uh, doing your thing, uh, at the bar with the kids, uh, with your significant other, you guys turn in for the night. And when you wake up the next morning, uh, you guys come down for your usual breakfast. Uh, and you hear a kid yelling outside.
01:41:09
Speaker
Uh, he's a, he's a little newsy boy. Apparently they had those. Um, and, uh, he runs in and he slaps a newspaper on the bar in front of sucky and chefy. And as you guys were sitting there at the bar, it reads, um, it reads headline news sinners. Canyon mine destroyed. Oh no, not tabby. Yeah.
01:41:34
Speaker
Um, yeah, so that's what we're in that episode for today. Thanks guys. Good job. Uh, thanks for the listeners for hanging out. I'm not going to go for our usual spiel because like, man, I'm tired. It's been a long day. I just want to have something you should know this shit by now.
01:41:54
Speaker
You should know there's shit, you know, if it's not worked out, you know, that's like it. If you take it, like, like if you hate it, write it, if you hate it, like it. If you, um, we got to come up with something better. If you make it. Well, yeah. Like it. If you like how we make it. Yeah. We'll come up with something. But yeah, you know, um, three besties and a guesty. Just go to the fun. It's ours is network.com guys. It's all on there. Just go there. Everything's there. It's just right there.
01:42:21
Speaker
Yeah. And so, um, just to keep it nice and simple, cause we ran a little late and my brain is cooked. I am just going to do what I've been doing at the end of that's our cue, which is I'm just going to read a quote that I think is neat, uh, to end the episode. Um, cause I think that that is cool. And this is one is from the late, great George Carlin. Uh, and he says the reason I talked to myself.
01:42:49
Speaker
You know what? I was in the middle of reading it, and then that guy with the glasses from the Today show popped up as an advertisement and blocked the whole thing. And I really, I really, I don't, I don't want to yell at him. They don't remember his name. What's that guy's name? Fuck. I don't remember. All right, let me try that again. The late, great George Carlos. The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
01:44:19
Speaker
He doesn't look good already.