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00:00:01
Savage City - Sick, Sick Dogs
17 Plays1 day ago
There's a lot of murder and a lot of intrigue going on in Savage City and our heroes are on the case! That is of course once they stop fighting and going in the wrong direction!
Transcript
00:00:00
Speaker
and Hello, good evening, good afternoon, good effort. Good effort. Good effort, yes. Good effort on clicking on this. and We appreciate it. Hello there, welcome to the show today. There's Cass, Adrian, and Adam. We're all here to play Savage City for you and do some silly business and some other things too. There's Snoop, not Snoop.
00:00:26
Speaker
We're gonna start snooping today. What are you doing here? Hey everybody, how's it going? one Yo, what's up honkies? so Any who stoop is played by Adam there. Snow Spear, the kitty cat lady is played by Cass and Adrian plays a character named Evan and they are all jumping out of a window at the end of the last episode. um What happened last? oh fuck I forgot we did that at the end. Yeah, it's a crazy thing. So last time I think I think me and snow did. I don't know if if ever everybody did. Everybody did. Even boss Williams was there.
00:00:58
Speaker
Oh, did Adrian's character jump out, too? I couldn't remember if he was staying home or not. He followed her for his keys. He's mad. Oh, right. She took his keys and jumped out the window. So that's crazy what happened there. Right before i that, I ate the goldfish.
00:01:12
Speaker
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. See a little Evan came back from the dead with little to no repercussions um He owes this make those are people a favor out in the desert, but that's gonna come sometime later if we remember it and Stoop was there and snow messed up Evan's apartment and he was mad and he she had potential sexual relations with boss Williams all over a place if you put a blue light black light black light black light and all over Evan's apartment. It'd be like, it'd be like somebody spilled a bunch of glowing milk all over the place. And then they all jumped up. banana milk from his banana, boss's banana. New from boss baby, boss banana. anyho um So then boss Williams was pantsless and Evan threw his pants out the window or somebody did and they wouldn't let him get them. So he ran through and jumped out the window to get his pants. And then Stoop jumped out the window to get his pants because somebody, oh shit, Ollie called him and said, hey man, somebody is killing people and dissolving their skin off their heads. So their skulls are there. And then they say on the somewhere written beside them is says,
00:02:19
Speaker
Their skulls aren't silver. So someone is doing ah a Batman versus the Joker with this with the stoops, vigilante persona. Oh, that could be anybody with a silver skull. They might not be talking about me. There's a million guys out there. um And then everybody jumped out the window after one another. It went boss, stoop, snow, or maybe snow, then stoop. I can't remember. Then lastly, Evan, because he's like, oh, gosh, darn it, you crazy kids. I was shot through the chest earlier this week. um And I know he's back. And he needs his keys back. He lost his keys in the desert. So that's where we left off. um How do you guys feel about that?
00:02:59
Speaker
ah Annoyed.
00:03:27
Speaker
full sprint down to Rigby Street and Ragby Street. Whatever you said it was. It was Rifter and Rafter because I'm bad at making up names on the spot. I didn't think of any beforehand. um And actually, ah first of all, you jump out of there and you do you run down the ah ah fire escapes? No, I jumped out the window.
00:03:47
Speaker
Jump down and like glided down the fire escape as a cat glided down like a cat she's a cat Well um stoop if you're jumping straight over to all ledge then make a athletics for me brother to see how well you land Well, I mean, a fucking athletic you broke because I'm going to ask like the shit out of this. You're going to. break You're going to feel really foolish for asking me to do such a thing, little bitch. And boss Williams did one to you see boss Williams down there with his neck snapped in half. ah no he he wrote told you it a lab bo williams is actually in a dumpster pretty pretty he's like pretty banged up but he's like Oh,
00:04:25
Speaker
sweet brother I mean, yes, you jump out. um You got a two. ah So you kind of baff it to there. You bang yourself around there. You're clang on the ground. And roll. Roll. Roll 2D of sixes for me. Oh, God. So you need to jump out the fucking window and his like foot catches on like the balcony. And all you hear is don't don't.
00:04:50
Speaker
don And you take it. Keeps hitting each one. It's eight so eights of damage and that's why it doesn't do shit to you. Somebody moved the car. I usually land on somebody my good so somebody squeezed all of my innards to the outside.
00:05:10
Speaker
And, uh, so snow, I'll let you go. You just, you just moved down the fire escapes gracefully and, uh, Evan, almighty. What do you do? Okay. He just runs down like a normal person as well. Perfection. So you guys are all down on the ground, um, in the alleyway behind Evan and snows bungalow pad and the apartment building complex.
00:05:32
Speaker
Uh, what are you going to do with your lives now? It's no, you're on the ground laying. And that's, you see, like his, you see, like his shoulder just pops back into place. Like, Oh, Oh, fuck. That's good stuff. Uh, Hercole nomic bone repress repositioning done in a flash. Yeah.
00:05:51
Speaker
as your search doctor yeah think but Yeah, there's like, there's like hands inside of my suit to just grab my arms and bones and muscles. No, no. to For me. There's a lot going on inside of this thing. I spent a lot of money on it. That's a freaky suit. It's a fucking freaky suit. I don't recommend putting it on because I can't take it off ever.
00:06:16
Speaker
I didn't say I didn't read the reviews before I ordered it. Did you read the manual? No, I'm still learning how to use it. like It's like when you buy something you like you but like online and you really want to wear it and it's like just a tat you go to try it on, it's a tad too small, but you like force just force it on you and then you're like, crap, this is too small. But you don't want to like cut it off, so you're just like, I guess this is part of me now.
00:06:48
Speaker
It's literally part of me. I can't take it off. It's inserted things inside of me in certain directions. I do not want to talk about it anyway. yeah You ever see that movie Saw? Cause there's Saw 3, I think. Cause there's like a thing in my ribs that I ah can't take it off. yeah It's literally a part of my rib cage.
00:07:08
Speaker
It's kind of like killer kill. Anyway, full sprint down to Rigby Street. What was it again? Rizzler Street? Yeah, whatever, man. Rizzler Street. like Why don't you roll intelligence for a smart to see if you can frickin' remember what he he told you. Have a smart roll. Everybody has to have a smart roll. What's it called? Smarts. Common knowledge. No, not common knowledge because it's you're not common knowledge and you're trying to remember what he just told you. Smarts. Oh, sorry.
00:07:36
Speaker
Three. It was very unsmart for you not to remember what smarts is. So yeah, you're pretty much what you're saying. You're like Rigby, ra Ragby, Resting. Full sprint towards the closest R-named street. That's two syllables. Okay. ah He's running off. but but but but boom His little heavy feet go away. You other two guys are in the alleyway. What's happening with you two jokesters? chuck I'm trying to forcefully take my keys.
00:08:03
Speaker
Okay. She is on all four legs, running to her car and getting in and speeding off. Please tell them the keys are in your mouth. Of like course they are. went away nice but would being love she was already or silly She is always ready. She is on that her six on the to all the time.
00:08:31
Speaker
are Adrian, Adrian, Adrian, haven't you ever run on all fours and had to put keys in your mouth? It's natural. I have run on all fours, but I've not put keys in my mouth. Or like anything that you want to carry in your mouth? Silly. just so I guess I did have, yeah.
00:08:45
Speaker
I was doing that earlier. I had like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, like a half one hanging out my mouth while I was peeing. And I was really worried that like it was so slowly degrading and I was going to drop my sandwich in the toilet. Guys, guys, where is this episode? OK, we get this back on track, please. Enough toilet sandwiches.
00:09:04
Speaker
Frickin Evan, do an athlete, athletics. Actually, both you guys do athletics to run into around.
00:09:14
Speaker
Snow's trying to get to her car. Yeah, she's got to do an athletics outrun. Do an athletics outrun. What's his physics? You got to say, what's your athletics, Snow? Do it. Do it. I was looking to see if I had, I have a, I have a free re-roll based on my ah class or my, what did I do this? What was this again? That sounds made up.
00:09:43
Speaker
Probably you're right, people still aren't classes. Acrobat. Right there. Acrobat. It's definitely, definitely made up, but it's made up by a savage world, so it's okay. So, um, okay, well, okay, uh, one for your role on athletics. Totals improve balance, tolling, uh, tolling. Totals in mine.
00:10:01
Speaker
ah He's still kind of catching now he's still catching up to you. um So you get to your car, there's snow, but he's right on hot on your heels. He's hot on your heels with his little running and he he can you're close enough to reach out at her as she opens her door. What do you do, Evan, with your ah hands or your body of sorts? I also get in her car.
00:10:20
Speaker
Okay, cool. You guys are both in the car now. Yeah, and I'm going to cause a car crash. Ha ha, survival. What are you wearing a survival for? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, snows spear who's your dm around here hey, hey, hey,
00:10:36
Speaker
i'm going to be pretty sure You know, I also have the free runner ability that I forgot I had. So I shouldn't have hurt myself earlier. Oh, yeah. I had it. if Well, he he forgot to use it. He forgot to use his running skills. He just jumped out and fell. so I was too stupid to remember that I was skilled. so like stupid yeah ah suppose I remember I'm good at parkour. What the hell?
00:11:02
Speaker
And then retroactively, I'll say, Snow, you were quick enough to... Well, no, you weren't quick enough. He was quicker than you. So you just try to lock the door, but he you lock it as he gets in the car with you. So you he didn't trap him outside. You trapped him inside the car with you.
00:11:15
Speaker
Now, you know how I thought it would be funny? Like Snow gets in, like, starts driving. It's like, oh, I made it. And then, like, after she's, like, drive for five minutes, I'm still here. Then she says, oh, I made it. And then Evan's also in the seat and he goes, yeah, good thing we lost him, huh? Yeah. Now give me his keys real quick. He goes like, he goes like full Bugs Bunny on that shit. window yeah willhel scream i see to keys on him but anyway ah Okay, what do you guys do in the car now that you're in the car with his zany situation happening they start making out probably Yeah he just want trying to he's out of a mouth i not i don't care for thriv like no oh That was cannon that's cannon she tossed your keys out the window I
00:12:07
Speaker
I'm doing athletics roll.
00:12:11
Speaker
I can run. Oh, this guy, you can't fucking keep him from getting those keys. and Anime character he style, he just flies out the window, does a cool roll, grabs the keys, mid roll, does a little cool landing with his with his. May I roll a thievery roll because I switched the keys?
00:12:33
Speaker
No, because this is silly and ass and then we're done with it. yeah And after I like, jump and roll onto like shoot that like a snow spears cast tires. You're shooting the car? Oh my lord.
00:12:50
Speaker
No, I give up because his rules always are like the highest freaking rules of the freaking game. Yes. You love it. I'm like really freaking low. No, I'm done. Fuck it. We can have the fucking car and the apartment and the keys. Fuck it.
00:13:05
Speaker
yeah let's ah where're which way ri Where are you driving, Snow? Are you going to go? Get your stupid car, your stupid keys. Are you going to wards where Snoop is running or are you just going somewhere random?
00:13:21
Speaker
ah She was going to go where Stoop was going. OK, do you do a smart scroll for your courtesy? If you remember what he said about what streets it's on. Sure, as evidence like whipping like water spells at the tires. Yes, we're just going to say four. Four. That's good enough. yeah You remember ah there was a rifter and a rafter street so you can punch one of those into your jeepers and um As you drive down the road following one, you get says turn the right or what we say. I don't know where your last voice was. We had on there. Turn right ahead. Whatever. Oh, it was a turkey meme in turn. Yes. As you turn right. you Yeah. You see stoop just running straight down the street still. Yeah. And like full like cartoonish like fucking run like some Ed Ednetti shit. He's like, yeah, what color is your armor suit on your skull? is
00:14:13
Speaker
So the skull is silver and blackish. The suit is like it's like silver with like ah orange um like.
00:14:24
Speaker
Like, you know, like the Green Ranger has like that gold, like V shoulder padding thing he wears. He has like a like an orange version of that. Like and's it's hard to tell if it's painted orange or if it's just tarnished, but that's what it looks like. And he has like a shitty little tattered cape hanging off it. OK, so you see an orange and silver streak going down the road in the wrong direction. And then you like I'm just like in my home and I go, all right, Rin, which way to Rizla Street?
00:14:52
Speaker
Ding, ding, ding, ding. Hello? Is that the name of your... Yeah, Rin is to name my navigation system on my own. I'm like out of water right now. Ah, fuck, you drink water. This shit runs on water, man. Piss into the tube. I'm sweating a lot. Just absorb that and tell me where to go. Tell me, take me to Rigby Street. Rizzla. Give me a few minutes to absorb all that sweat. Fucking no good to me, Rin.
00:15:22
Speaker
I just keep sprinting down there. Look for the nearest person. OK, OK. There's a person. There's many people all over the street. You're way back. Many people. I want to spot the first person that gives me bad bad feelings. Gives you a stink eye. There's a there's a well to do elf in a nice silver suit. So a silver like shiny looking suit, not like man. Dropkick.
00:15:48
Speaker
Full-on like missile out. Both my feet leave the ground and they aim towards him. How long have been here? In like the first 20, not even 20 minutes in, I've already lost control of this episode. Okay, we're all fighting on this man. I never was in control. Six. Six, okay. So this man gives you a stink eye as you like sprint down the street screaming, I'm sweating in his suit, just drink this fight. And ah you drop kick him in the chest and he just goes,
00:16:14
Speaker
oh and I run up to him and I grab him. Where's Rigby Street? Where's the place where the people's ankles are being melted? I Oh fuck, I forgot elves need to do that. Hang on a second. Just breathe slowly, into the nose, out to the mouth. You've got this. No, into the nose, into the nose, out to the mouth. My lung. Oh fuck, sorry. I think I collapsed his lung. Is there a doctor?
00:16:41
Speaker
Anybody know where the guys that got the face melted off is? I think I got the app on my phone. He's he's like, pulling his he's like shaggly pulling his phone out of his or was like his little device out of his hand and it's in his pocket he's like, he's trying to click on it and ah but say it just like, like, like, like, like, like, like,
00:17:12
Speaker
they And they go, Bido, Bido, Bido. And they come with a little stretcher and they're like, Bido, Bido. And they throw it down um and they start trying to grab them to put them on the stretcher. I grabbed one of them. Where's the guy that you got? Where's the people you had to pick up that got their faces melted off? Bido, Bido, Bido.
00:17:31
Speaker
and you see that they're uh they're on Bido street you see they're the the the the Bido race of people who are very good with medicine but they have a very simple language where they say Bido Bido Ren Ren translate Bido oh my god he says what are you talking about man where's the guys that got to translate for me where's the guys that got their faces mounted Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido. Oh, God. I know that that's what they're saying. I need to know what that translates. I'm translating to him. Give me a second to tell him. I'm sorry. Oh, God. it he's Sorry. Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido. said, what about the guys with the skulls? What are you talking about? He said, where's this? There's a somebody melted. Aren't you guys paramedics? Somebody melted faces of people.
00:18:23
Speaker
and left them as skulls and they're looking for the silver skull, which I assume is me. She says B2B2 a bunch of times, and he says B2B2 a bunch of times. And she says, um, they're in the morgue, duh. You know, Justin, you're the one that's not putting this back on the rails. I'm trying to help you, buddy. I know. I'm trying to help you.
00:18:46
Speaker
All right, fine. I'll go to the morgue then. um And so which way is the morgue? Can I just get a ride, please? Bido, Bido, Bido. They said, hell no, let us say this. All this guy's dead. All right, I'm getting in the back.
00:19:03
Speaker
it um Then the Bido guy, you see, he pulls a little device out of his pocket and he clicks it and then you hear. And a couple of days about of a blue truck that comes down like, who the fuck's fucking with the paramedics? Get out here. What are you doing over here, man?
00:19:21
Speaker
These guys, these Bido guys killed that guy. And I was just trying to get him to the morgue where he's supposed to go. And and the guy turns this, ah he's like a human God mustache. He turns to, uh, one of the Bido guys. He's like, uh, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido, Bido. He says, uh, you were standing on this guy's chest when they got here. That doesn't sound like me. I save people. I don't kill them.
00:19:49
Speaker
Listen man, just go, just go about your business. Please get away from these guys. Let them take this dead body of the morgue. Hey, can you tell me where the morgue is is, please? I don't think I should do that. I need, I'm trying to help with your investigation of the gut people. You know, the people who got the faces melted off down to skulls. Um, thanks. i I don't think we need the help of whoever, whatever you are. ah god you Can you at least tell me what street they were picked up on? Um, I have family over there.
00:20:20
Speaker
Why don't you roll some sort of, some sort of role persuasion or something? I was a nine tree chip. He's like, uh, oh shit, man. Um, uh, whatever, uh, there's nothing, whatever. Uh, there was one on Rifter, one on Rafter and another one on, um, uh, Bill Nye street. Rifter after and Bill Nye street. Got it.
00:20:46
Speaker
Yeah. All right. This is Bill Bystreet. I wrote that down. All right, man. anyway All right. Anyway, hey. Keep it cool. Thanks. good You should really watch out for these guys for murdering this dude, by the way. We'll keep an eye on him. Thanks. Come on, let's go. Paul Snow. Let's go tongue punch some donuts, Rick. The guy says he raised his fist. I'm trying. Ryn. Ryn. Call Snow Spear. Very fixed. Hey.
00:21:16
Speaker
Calling snow spirit surveys. Um, so your phone rings or Evan or at which Evan, Oh my God, I'm calling. i Just call snowy. Just call snowy snow spear. Your phone rings. Oh my God. What? You know, snow, when I first met you, you talked in a much more low town and you were kind of chill all the time. Now you kind of, you sound like my, my robot that lives in my head.
00:21:45
Speaker
Well, you know, I just lost my apartment, so I'm a little angry at the moment, so what do you need, stoop? Hi, can y'all come pick me up? We have to go to Rifter, Rafter, and Bill Nye Street to go investigate. Apparently, they picked the skull people up already. Oh. Well, I was already headed that way, but I guess they can come back for you. Yeah, I just realized I've been running towards the wrong street this whole time. Apparently, it's not Rizzla Street.
00:22:16
Speaker
so I could see that I could see how you got confused. All right. Just, uh, I guess send me your coordinates and I'll be right there. Uh, yeah. Just look for the, um, look for the ambulances and the cop cars. I'm over there. You'll hear them. They'll sound like this. Be do, be do, be do. That sounds super specific. Uh, yeah. it is
00:22:43
Speaker
So. Yep. Yep. Don't get me in here. Rin, send my coordinates to snow. Okay. Um, and then, uh, Evan, as you're standing or walking down the street, um, you probably see all the cop cars and shit going down there to the, where Stoop was. Um, he also sees snows car come back down the street and turn down towards all that shit too. Hi. Do you know how you like getting to cause the saints, how they just some like jump through the, like the window.
00:23:11
Speaker
Yeah. Like I'll do that. Um, okay. Roll another athletics roll for me. She swerves out of the way. but You don't need to, you're on the road three. Um, do you want an early pointless Benjamin? Sure. Let's do that.
00:23:32
Speaker
ah Five. Five. Um, okay. You jump into the car again and snow that he's now in your car. Hello there.
00:23:42
Speaker
ah but i got rid you ah
00:23:48
Speaker
Now you have no snows, no snows, no keys to throw away. You have no snows to key. Wait. Wait, how did he get it? How did he jump in my car? Feet first, Bo Dukin. Yes. Bo Dukin. I don't have a moonroof in my car. He came into where in the side window. Have you not played Saints Row 3 or 4? Yes. You got out of hell? How about the shooting remake?
00:24:17
Speaker
Okay. Oh, right. Good for that one. but Good call. Good call. Anyway, he jumps, he jumps through the windows super hero style. yeah rema was speak um And, um, but the same way, same way he got out in the first place and you're driving down towards stupid. He's probably down there walking away from the cops in a sweat drop. They have these miles. What? And stupid. See your friends and they're happy as ever to be together and and seeing you. I see. yeah I'm sorry to see you.
00:24:47
Speaker
So I was your name again. My name's Edgar. Edgar, like Edgar Gar. Exactly. and Edward Edwin Gar. Edward. Edward Gar. Yes. Right. Wait, can you guys give me a ride to River Street? Wait, what is it? Rafta Street. but But you'll have to pay us. That's what I came to come get you for.
00:25:15
Speaker
I have to pay you? This is my car. She's a driver and I just take the money. Can she kick him out of her car?
00:25:28
Speaker
You can try. Just reach over and just whop with her cat back haunches. Just kick him straight out of the car. I'm just go to i'm just trying to like try to push i'm just goingnna try to pick the car up like, yeah, this car's coming with me. Come on. Can you guys just be normal?
00:25:49
Speaker
and I've been trying to get to the scene as a crime for like 25 minutes. I know, but you got to give me credit. as a functional crew Anywho, no stoop says that to them as he's trying to lift the car. I've been trying to get you to see the crime for 20 minutes. I got to get a motorcycle or a bike or something. Me too. Guys, do you want to get into the car so stoop? Yes. Well, they're bickering like I'm going to sit on Evans lap. ah You're very, you're very heavy.
00:26:19
Speaker
I know I'm very, very happy. I tried to go too late. Too late. As I start to buckle the seatbelt on top of both of us, like great suck it in Evan. There we go. I got to get the seatbelt around you. Oh, and right. and Now you're all three in the car. at Snow, which street are you driving to first? Rifter, rafter or Bill Nye? Bill Nye. Bill fucking I.
00:26:43
Speaker
Go by. Turn left, turn right, turn right, turn left. um Sit at stop sign for five minutes. Go to the next one. And you're there. It's Bill Nye Street. And you see the old um police. No, I'm going to say they're just a little fancy. They use like probably like old lady. They probably use like i'm like ah holographic little lines that go across things and they probably took those away. So there's nothing there. Now there's an old street alleyway. Fucking fancy. There's an old street and alleyway. Ouch.
00:27:08
Speaker
I can't bit me. Sorry. Um, my wires. I want to tell it to stop and it bit me instead. Um, what Snowspear does. Who would have guessed it anyway? Um, so you guys see an old alleyway where there is like, um, signs of previous police investing limitations. There's an old chalk outline up somewhere in a little alleyway as about all of this left there at the current moment. Uh, all right. Um, so why are we here again?
00:27:38
Speaker
Well, Evan, if you must know, um, apparently Ollie calls me and says that there's people with their faces melted off down to the skull, the bone of the head, by the way. And there's notes left around saying that their skulls aren't silver. So either I have a really big fan or somebody who's trying to threaten me. I just want to look into it to make sure I ain't got like a supervillain on my hands.
00:28:08
Speaker
A super villain. Yeah. You know, like a villain that's super. Yeah. Hmm. Have you dealt with like super, super villains before? Not super, super villains, but super, super civilians. Yeah. Super, super petty criminals. Yeah. People who are like, they think about stealing and I take them down. Pretty cold. Like fault crime. Yeah, I get it.
00:28:40
Speaker
of the dirty alleyway. No, not really made twigs, not not supernatural in the city box you live in. I know twig is the name of like a vaping company. And I stepped on like ah somebody dropped their vape, like running from the cops. So I stepped on it. I lost my twins. But you get over there toward the outline of it.
00:29:10
Speaker
The dead body is they used to be there. And now there's just an outline of a chalk drawing. And they still don't even clean it when they're done. And along the wall that says in like some in some silver spray paint, ah his skull wasn't silver. It's kind of faded from some days past. But yeah.
00:29:33
Speaker
OK. OK. All right, Evan. Evan, run an analysis. Use your computer brain. How would I use an analysis? I don't I can maybe do some hacking, but there's like nothing here to like interact with. right um All right. So is there I mean, what's left? So there's writing on the wall, some spray paint. There's still some chalk outlines.
00:30:01
Speaker
um ah Not that Stupa is the smartest guy in the world, but he is a little little bit noticey because he's Not exactly an investigator, but he can spot crime when he sees one. So what is there anything I can look for around the area? Or anything that's like ah any sort of smells that might not smell like the rest of this weird rancid area? I mean, you're going to go by smell, huh?
00:30:32
Speaker
Yeah, and I'm asking specifically because I know a certain cat that might have a better sense of smell than me. Whoa. Oh, well, do you want to roll a nose? Do you want to ask us? But what are you doing? you I'm going to ask her to sniff around while I look around. I was going to say, Snow, are you coming up there? Mm hmm. Yep. Now we. I'm going to use my eyes to spell. OK, you said s Snowy. Yes, I said Snowy.
00:31:01
Speaker
I didn't hear him, sorry. What? If you're going to give me this attitude the whole time, I'm going to put you back in the car. Fine, I'd rather sit in the car right now. What's your fucking deal, man? She points to her over her shoulder with her thumb part of her claws. She just points over to Evan. Evan, what'd you do?
00:31:30
Speaker
Look, you're gone for like a week and then you come back and you're kind of a prick. What happened to you? Did you lose the cool part of your brain?
00:31:40
Speaker
What do you mean? I mean, you pissed off Snowy. Her whole voice in into me is different now. What'd you do? I mean, she tried to steal my apartment and and I took it back. It's rightfully mine. not yeah' mad about that that I do anything about that. You were dead.
00:32:00
Speaker
I was dead, but miraculously I came back from the dead. You should make a religion about me, but I'm five don't so be glad about that. I'm fine praying to my cat goddess, but thank you for the offer. What would you like?
00:32:22
Speaker
What I would like for you to do is just, you know, get a good, get a, you know, you got that little kitty cat nose of yours. It's probably much more sensitive than my kitty cat nose. Um, so if you wouldn't mind, I'm trying to figure out who's trying to kill me and threaten me. or So.
00:32:41
Speaker
Cause you take a little snifferoonie around the area, dictate what smells like it's from here and what smells like it isn't. Cause I need to kind of get a clue. And meanwhile, I'm going to rip out Evan's eyes and use those to look around. Okay. What, what would you like me to smell for?
00:32:59
Speaker
Honestly, I'm not really sure. I was hoping maybe you could just determine, you know, what this alley already smells like. And if there's anything that seems a bit out of place, you know, like, you know, like when you go into like a pawn shop and you see like a brand new gold watch in there and you're like, Oh, somebody definitely stole that. You know, like, but you, yeah but smells, there's like a smell that doesn't belong here. You know, I find it hard to believe that whoever got melted here is from here. Okay. We'll check it out. Evan, give me your eyes.
00:33:29
Speaker
Those are my property alone and I don't like to show a property. So, no thank god you. don't like fuck You don't like to fucking do anything. Fine. But use your eyes yourself. Look around. Use your little robot eye. Use your special eyes. I don't use my special eyes.
00:33:45
Speaker
You just specialize. You got a four on her notice of sniffing the area. Evan, are you going to do a notice roll as well? Yes. so a Four as well. You guys are mediocre. Four is a success. That's not mediocre at all. I know freaking time.
00:34:04
Speaker
it like You base successes on this game as if you get a raise or not. you i mean Yeah, I mean you're just doing average average normal work at a four. That's the base success. That's that's you know the better minimum you can do, whereas ah anything really amazing is really amazing. um Yes, no, you smell... ah I mean, am I wrong? Am I wrong? It's the base minimum that's average.
00:34:23
Speaker
and hey didn good get i don can come at me and i know my wife my judgment my way i speak about it i we yeah okay you anyho you know yeah you're sniffing around you're down on all fours i imagine smell in the the um the right where the crotch of the Chalk outline is the faint residual smell of poop and pee. That's kind of that's kind of everywhere. That's kind of everywhere also. So that's not really anything unusual. um <unk> like the cats do i should have donet eat the Like that cat that like sniffed it, whatever the fuck that was, a that that cat video, what? but The tongue came out.
00:35:05
Speaker
when Yeah. OK. So you so thanks ai overy for telling me immediately how to dissolve skin to the bone or skin and bone. um Wow. That's the end bone. I need to know what it can dissolve skin to the FBI. Do not come after us. Breathing white. Probably some kind of skeleton behind. OK. You smell some ammonia around the head region of the paint of the ah chalk outline.
00:35:32
Speaker
um But that really doesn't give you much it other than to know and maybe that's how this I don't know if you if your character knows much about um Sciences and whatnot and if they have a Google they can use real quick. That's where this head was dissolved um and you also smell a little bit of a smell of ah Sort of let's say you so you smell dog food But there's no dog food places around here and you don't see any dog bowls you smell me smell a faint smell of dog food and And, um, as you're sniffing and finding these things out, uh, what cat pee smells like. Oh, no, it's what you're, you're, you're, you're pretty mad. Do you think another cat's been pissing around here taking your territory? That's all. This is your hallway. Now, all of a sudden you see your tail just puff out. Wasn't the, um, the, uh, warehouse that we, uh, fought the one place. Wasn't that the dog food factory? No.
00:36:28
Speaker
OK, it's just a container warehouse does with random bullshit. OK, I think it was called the chum fuckery or something. I forget what you guys said. I called it. Evan, you hear it with your but with your for your specialized see stuff, too. I see stuff. Let's say um you see there's a lot of like for evidence of foot traffic because there's a bunch of police that came through here, but you also see Oh, what exactly would be a good thing to send you in a certain direction? You see some huge graffiti on the wall with the address of the guy. Not quite. Yeah. He's like, oh, you weren't supposed to spray paint our address underneath the message. You eat it. You see um some other footprints, heavy looking footprints into the dirty, dirty ah
00:37:22
Speaker
alleyway floor that um lead a way like they're coming from further down the alley, not from the street. And they're like walking down towards where the body was some heavier footprints. Perhaps they were carrying something like a body.
00:37:41
Speaker
I think they were carrying a board and you were walking that way into the alley. Are we in like a strip of houses or anything?
00:38:15
Speaker
Is there a ah ah building that overlooks that place? Like any cameras? all yeah as' There's probably cameras. Yeah, there's probably a couple of cameras. And there's yeah yeah, there's definitely buildings overlooking you. You're in an alleyway, so there's alleys are made of buildings. So yeah. look up I look up at the camera and I look at Evan. I'm like, you thinking what I'm thinking? I'm thinking you should look at those cameras.
00:38:40
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Well, that too, I was thinking let's just like steal them because they look like they're nice cameras. mean't Yeah, we should think you can just, you can just interface them right there. I guess you can interface. I was going to go kick down the security door and go ask questions, but yeah, that works too. Okay, let's split up.
00:38:59
Speaker
Why would you do that if you can just interface with it? free I mean, you could like go and like go to the security office and I like the camera and then you're like, it's like, double as better than just one way to do things. I suppose. ah Snowy, what'd you find? She has her tail all puffed up and she's like trying not to retch. She does like that cat retch, like every single time she brings her nose to the ground and you just see her head just jerk back up. She's like, man, there's either a cat and a dog running around this place, like murdering people or we've got a sick, sick dog.
00:39:49
Speaker
so There's a six sick, sick dog. There's your title of your episode right there. Yep. There's ah says a sick, sick dog around here. We got to find him poochy poochy. Um, and I walked up to the, uh, people are their dog people haven't subscribed yet, um but, uh, maybe. All right.
00:40:12
Speaker
I'm going to walk over to the apartment building. It's overlooking this alleyway where the cameras are as Evan goes to interface. All right, snow. Good deal. Keep up the good work or, you know, go, maybe go blast some like heavy music in your car. Just to like, relax, you know, get all that anger out.
00:40:29
Speaker
Or you can come with me. That's fine too. Whatever you want to do. You did a good job. I mean, yeah. All right. Do you want to come with me? I mean, you can come with me. I'm just going to go kick indoors. oh to come of kick a door. You know how much I love kicking in doors. That's like what hold on. Hold on. She like pulls out her headphones out of her pockets and puts them in plays like heavy metal music. She's like, all right, I'm ready. Let's go. Uh, right. All right. Well, we're not going to kick in the first door, but we're going to find the security office inside of the apartment building and then we'll kick in that one.
00:41:08
Speaker
OK, she starts doing shadow boxing. She's listening to the metal music. Yeah, you're really kicking that guy's ass now. Good job. um this So there's like yeah there's like an little alleyway door and says ex on it like, you know. It says exit. We have to find the one that says enter on it. That's it. I mean, where does the word exit? Where's the main entrance that people go in and out of? so go are Probably and probably on a front street.
00:41:34
Speaker
All right, we're going to go on the front street. I'm going to go in there. OK, cool. You go in there and there's like a little shitty lobby with some little shitty chairs and just like a wall of like three elevators. And then there's like a little door that says stairwell. And there's like a little another door that says staff only. All right. So now kick that door in. Yeah. The staff door in.
00:41:58
Speaker
You can't just say, you can't just say, sorry, you got to actually I forgot I was running the show. I guess I just sort of just listen to you guys for a second there. I was doing an old Adrian back in the day. um Yeah. Roll a fighting on the door. Adrian, remember when you used to forget that you were in the show? That was my favorite. I love it. Holy shit. You kicked that thing right off its hinges. It flies inward.
00:42:20
Speaker
and it bashes all around and it knocks a little wheelie chair over that's in front of it that's on a desk with a big screen of some a couple monitors and like little computer and shit there and the chair goes you know flies over the other way and there's an old uh plastic house like plastic plant in there in the corner and there's no one there but there's the computer screens there are screens in the wall that have like four camera at angles of the street and shit and or some in interior things i guess they kind of probably switch in between interior cameras in the hallways and shit in the building. ah There's nobody in here. Fuck. Nope. All right. Almost like they don't give it too much of a shit about their security. Well, I was going to go rough somebody up. but You know, I guess you know how to work this shit. i There's no way I'm going to know how to my fucking stubby fingers in these gloves are not going to be to push any buttons.
00:43:14
Speaker
I mean, I can try. i I'm kind of more so like, I don't know, the driver, but like I i can try. A short try. Why are you doing life driving? the The whole like, dad with the ah forefinger just pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop,
00:43:44
Speaker
ah trying to either it is it is it on yeah you just pressed space and it turns on to the best top little screen is there a password no it just goes right to the desktop they don't care no okay well she like she'll like hit the spacebar and she'll just like see that it opens up and no password she looks at Evan and or not Evan stoop and shrugs there you go You had the perfect chance to say, I'm in, but you didn't do it. And you guys look up at the camera screen and you see Evan climbing up onto something to get to the camera outside. You Evan, do a hackyroll as you're plugging into that camera outside. And. It's a six. A six. Oh, yeah, brother, you're you're jacked in. You see like sticking in real good. Oh, yeah, brother.
00:44:41
Speaker
You probably see kind of a similar sort of interface that they do. Not really the same though, but you see like it says, um, you know, I guess it goes up when you're, how do you see, what do you see when you hack? Do you see shit like in your eyes and you're just like an inside your brain? hey i mean like or like check into the camera, it's kind of like you're wearing smart glasses, but without the glasses, such as see things in front of my eyes. whoa Smart glasses without the glasses. Smart eyes. I feel like I'd give me a headache. um Unless you got a smart brain. Smart eyes. um ah So ah you see like a little thing that says um camera one, two, three, four, ah back alley. It says on it and it says it has like a bunch of different dates and files and all kind of crazy things like that.
00:45:24
Speaker
And you can do something with them. Then I guess I'll look through like the videos from the camera where like the murder happened. OK. Stupid never got a date.
00:45:41
Speaker
huh I said, stoop never got a date for when it happened. Don't you talk about my love life. I get picked all the time. But but um I'm kind of on one right now. Why don't you roll another hacking for me?
00:45:56
Speaker
And if you do well enough, I will let you do it. Okay. So you're using your smart eyes and your smart brain to figure out our advice what we're most recently access to the files. And you find those for the date of yeah that makes sense yeah of two weeks ago, sometime you find that date and the days around it. And they, and you look at those footages inside of your, and in front of your eyes and do you just kind of fast forward until you see anything interesting happening?
00:46:25
Speaker
Um, I don't know, probably some more happening. Okay, so you're gonna look for the army. I'm using like just gonna, are you gonna watch it in slow time? Are you gonna fast forward and try and and like and like fast forward and like if I see like something interesting, I'll stop. Okay, okay. Roll a notice for me.
00:46:45
Speaker
Five. Five, okay. So you see you see passing before your eyes very quickly, all kinds of vivid ah back alley images. You see two bums fighting, two bums fisting each other.
00:47:01
Speaker
It's the same bums. It's a true love story for the agent. Enemies to love us. And then you see them sleeping and a dog comes by and humps both their heads. um And then you see some people walking down and back real fast. And then you see on a faithful night of
00:47:43
Speaker
And do you want to parse that or play it normal? Yeah, like man pause and I played a normal speed. All right, sweet. So you do that. And as you're playing and watching this grisly scene, no. And what's your face back in the place? What are you doing? You see like files and shit, like I said, kind of he does. You see a bunch of different like, you know, camera folders and all kind of shit like that. Camera folders?
00:48:06
Speaker
Yeah, like photos for different cameras for different like, you know, they have different like, like I said, one, two, three, four back alley is like six, seven, five, eight floor to. Where does the second which camera points that where the the crime scene was one, two, three, four back alley. One, two, three, four back alley. Yeah. Oh, so back alley is the one that we were at. Yeah.
00:48:31
Speaker
All right. And where does one start in comparison to back alley? Like if we switch between the two, where does somebody walked out of frame on back alley? When would they walk into frame of one, two, three or four?
00:48:44
Speaker
Um, and there's not one, two, three or four that the camera in the back alley is called one, two, three, four. It's like, that's just its name. but Oh, oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were saying the options were one, two, three, four. All right. No, just one camera number one, two, three, four. They only have one camera in the whole building and it's the back alley. No, I just said there's some in the apartments and then the hallways and things like that. But that's the, um are there any other ones outside?
00:49:09
Speaker
Yeah, there's seven five to front. All right. Well, the seven type five to front. Like, is there just one in the back and one on the front? um At least outside. Yes. OK, well, that doesn't help me. I want to go fucking knocking on doors and hey, s Snowy, could you do me? I don't know if that was my voice or not. Hey, Snowy, could you do me a favor? Any time. Could you do that thing where like you go on your You're at the internets and you ask questions. Oh, you mean Jujal? Yeah, Jujal. Yeah, that one. Ask Guk. I'll ask Guk. Maybe that sounds good. Yeah. Can you, can you go to TOQ and ask a question? Sure. Uh, can you ask, uh, just, just type in just typically like, where's the,
00:50:07
Speaker
Who melted the faces of the of the people this week? Something. Yeah, you'll figure it out. You know, you'll you'll you'll do that. You'll figure it out. I got to go. I'm going to go interrogate some people around here. How about I search of any other murders based with ah melted faces? Wow.
00:50:35
Speaker
I would have never thought about that. Yeah, that's good. Do that. Okay. Related. Dear Adam, do you have any other mystery murders with melted faces sent?
00:50:51
Speaker
And immediately you get a bunch of results and all kind of things. The top one says sponsored. Yeah, he says trying to dissolve flesh down to the bone. And then there's a picture. There's an animated picture of a spiky hair guy going, I knew it. I knew it. This is what you wanted, right?
00:51:15
Speaker
All right. So you're going to sift through some search, Google search, some of you where it has two key searches. And Steve, you're going to knock on some doors, which doors are you knocking on? I'm going to go up a couple of floors. OK. To the windows that overlook. ah That alley better. OK. Are there any are there any apartments on this side that have a window facing that alley? Oh, yeah, probably. Yeah.
00:51:40
Speaker
Oh, I'm just going to go to one of those so I can get a better look from there because someone heard something um on the ground floor. I mean, no no, not on the ground floor. Oh, well, that's what that was. My question. All right. I'm going to go. OK, there you go. um So you go up one and then picking the stairs. I don't trust elevators. Fair enough. There's probably like you know five doors on each side of the hall. All right. And do I i know what side?
00:52:05
Speaker
Whenever I need to go on the side. It's facing the alley. Yeah, you can be smart enough to do that and I'm not gonna make you roll for it. Yeah, I'm just gonna start Beating on the door the like the the one that's farthest down the hall closest to that alley OK, yeah, I can't imagine every single one of them have an alley facing window. They might do, I guess, you know, they're kind of on that wall on that side of the building. But anyway, yeah you knock on that door and ah it opens up and there is a ah what kind of what kind of person comes out of that room? A gnome. Hey, everybody, what are they for you? It's a gnomish lady. She's really hot.
00:52:44
Speaker
I'm just like like boobs the size of her head. She should not be stacked the way she is. Sorry, I just got out of the shower. I can see that. Could you please um tell me if you saw anything within the past couple of days or weeks? You know, the cops are outside the paramedics. It was, um you know, people's faces that look a lot like my helmet, but bony. You know what I'm talking about.
00:53:12
Speaker
Oh, yeah, I saw all that crazy stuff. That was terrifying. Well, could you fucking tell me what happened? um Yeah, the cops came and took the dead body away. Thank goodness. Could you stop touching my chest, ma'am?
00:53:26
Speaker
Sorry, it's just so shiny. Yes, I know, but you're kind of... yeah You're going to rust it with your wet fingers. Oh, sorry. She wipes it off on her voluptuous numish bosoms that are covered with a towel. You know, I know a kitty cat who might like you. Or at least the big beardy guy who's got an obsession with goldfish. Okay. Anyway, what happened? Tell me everything.
00:53:55
Speaker
Um, well, it's like I'm being really menacing about it. Oh my God. I'm just kind of tired. So I'm just phoning it in today. Okay. Truth be told, I jumped out a window and beefed it pretty hard. So I'm kind of still recovered from that. Can I be, can I be honest with you too? I kind of feel weird doing the sexually, sexy voice. So I'm going to stop. I didn't ask you to. I just said that you had big boobs. They didn't say that you said I was attractive. You can be attractive and stacked and not be, you know, horny.
00:54:30
Speaker
Well, I was being heard. I just had an attractive voice. You're the one that made her touch her chest. I just made her have a sexy voice. I didn't make her touch her chest. I said she was touching my chest. Yeah, I mean, you made her touch your chest. I just made her stand there sounding sexy. Pretty. That's only because you were talking to the sexy voice. Sorry, I turned you on.
00:54:49
Speaker
um um But she goes, Apology accepted, Justin. Yeah, they I woke up in the middle of the night and this how I talk now. I heard them clamoring around out there, the police man, and they was looking at the headless body with the skull sticking off of it. And it was very scary. And they didnt they sniffed all the around, asked me the questions, kind of like you're asking. I didn't see them. Nobody bring no body around there. I don't know how it got there. I guess that your voice is really.
00:55:25
Speaker
I've got different tonalities to my voice, sir. It don't matter what it is to me. I think we're super down here, but not up here because I'm all idea. I need to go over there. Um, all right. Look, I know they asked you a lot of things. I'm going to need you to really think about it. Think back to any disturbances before the police came. Okay. You know, I don't know how long those things were there. I don't know how often you go outside or in the back alley, but really, really think about it. Okay. I think long and hard.
00:55:52
Speaker
And I'm going to do you something that's going to jog your memory, OK? Oh, what's that? um I'm just going to just like try to just scare her real quick just to see if like her fight or flight kicks in and she remembers something. OK. So like I'm just going to like ah step in and stomp my foot really loud. I'm like, fucking tell me who did this. OK, we're all in combination.
00:56:19
Speaker
I know you remember something. Tap real deep into there, otherwise I'm going to kick you in a fucking head and deflate your goddamn chest while I'm at it. Did you hear me say roll intimidation? Yes, I did. I was just in the middle of seeing something that was- Oh man, you're going on because you're filling the air because you didn't know anything. Nope, I rolled a seven.
00:56:36
Speaker
oh
00:56:39
Speaker
ah dead my god I did. I went out for a drink of water. I completely forgot. And I saw there was a some sort of person, I saw some movement down there that I said, I don't like people walking around outside any time of the day, really. And I looked out, what are you doing there? I said, and I looked out there. I didn't say it out loud. I ain't trying to get shot.
00:56:58
Speaker
I'm not trying to get a shot. I'm a woman. I'm a normal woman. I'm so tiny and frail. And I can barely hold my tits up. Anyway, she says. Oh my God. I literally just like with all the different voices, like I imagine like all of a sudden you hear a zip and a fucking the it's like an actual like Halloween costume and you see or yeah to like two gerbils standing on each other's shoulders or some shit.
00:57:27
Speaker
I tell you, we love going out for water. We hate when there's when there's people outside. I told you, Mary, this will never work. Anyway, yeah, there was someone carrying a big, heavy bag. And I said, what the hell are you doing? Of course, not out the window, because I don't want to get shot, as I said. um And they sat it down and started to unzip it. And that's why I dad i saw the skull. i think i I think I ran back to bed and went to sleep. I popped a couple of Ambien and went to sleep, I think.
00:57:55
Speaker
I don't know who Ambien is, but they probably deserve popping. Now listen, how big was the person carrying the the bodies around? Oh, bigger than me. the I assumed. Could you please be more? Are they bigger than me? They were about the size of you, I would say. A bit chalky. Fuck.
00:58:19
Speaker
All right, Ben. All right. Is there anybody else in this hallway I should be talking to? you Just just help me save some time here. um I don't I don't know. We all were kind of gossip and I don't know. But nobody else I talked to on this floor really knows much else that I said they saw. I don't think um even nosy nosy Ned down at room two. He was he said he saw the guy pull his thing out, too. But he didn't know much else. He saw him come down the alley and walk back the other way down the to far end again. I just that's all we saw. Anybody. So I think somebody dropped off the body with a skull all just shown off for everybody to see.
00:58:59
Speaker
He said they spent some time spray painting on the wall, but that was about it I was gonna say how do we not like we saw the spray? But there's only one person that we saw right or that they said they saw right? Yeah, and there's spray paint on the wall mm-hmm what I mean reasonably with us looking at it and these two being Standard height for like most creatures and I'm like a dwarven guy and Do I have reason to believe that it was somebody who was shorter and stockier than me or as me to spray paint something on the wall as opposed to being able to start it farther up because they're taller? Like as she says that, is that something that I could believe because I saw the writing on the wall? Yeah, it's it's a set of pretty. It was as you think about it, it was actually at your eye level. It was perfect. Right. Interesting.
00:59:49
Speaker
All right, boobs, you've been really helpful. Thank you for your time. How'd you know my name? You ever, ever written there on your boobs? Oh, this is my monogram towel. I forgot. She turns around and she on her ass says McGee.
01:00:03
Speaker
that why Bye, Mrs. McGee. Thanks. That's our closing the door. Right. um And outside, Evan, you're hacking in and you see the person gets down on the ground and dumps the bag out and unzips it. And they set up the little body with the skull and they spray paint. They've got a hood on, but you see out of it ah some some blondish hair sticks out. ah Maybe it's a little long. It seems you can't really tell, but there's a blondish hair sticks out of the hood.
01:00:37
Speaker
And it's about all you see in that, uh, what is, it's kind of a grainy, shooty thing, but I guess it's fancy. It's, it's future enough that they can probably have color in the, in the cameras. You see some, some vaguely blondish hair, uh, lighter and brighter in color, if at the very least. Um, and, uh, yeah, then he gets up and and walks away back down the alley once he came. Oh, what he kind of looks like. Yeah. Yeah.
01:01:03
Speaker
And are you goingnna be going to walk into the building after them? um If you like switch to the front camera, do I like see anything else interesting, like when he passes? um No, he doesn't go out the front, he goes down further into the alleyway. Oh, yeah, right. He's around the back way, he's in the world. And then I just plug out and I go to the other side.
01:01:26
Speaker
Okay, okay. i Snow, why don't you roll... Oh, you have a research skill. Why don't you roll a little research for me as you research on a computer. dead things alive. Um, so yeah, you find a bunch of different stuff. Uh, if we find the articles about these most recent bodies and maybe you probably get some little more information that will help you guys look into them later. But, um, uh, as far as like dates and times and things like that, when they were found and presumed dead and all that bull crap and malarkey.
01:01:56
Speaker
Um, and, uh, you also find some old articles from, from five years ago. You see, there was somebody once, um, there, there was some bodies found dissolved just bones. Oh no. And there was a killer that was discovered and,
01:02:21
Speaker
captured He was found beaten to a pulp um somewhere once, and they arrested him. And then, oh no, he broke out of prisons.
01:02:35
Speaker
Quite recently. Gasp. And Stu, you've talked to Booz McGee. Do you go back downstairs? I go back downstairs. Holy shit, you guys convene all at the same time with all your information. It's slightly the same, but somewhat partially different, too. Guys, I have the biggest piece of news. Booze takes a huge piece of news. Literally, i was I was going to say it was like, I have two really big pieces of news to tell you about. Booze fucking in McGee. One big piece
01:04:05
Speaker
but does it look good already and Chairman of your fu-