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Yea so were the new cum town (funny guys)
56 Plays10 days ago
35 and after minute mark might be our best parts ever. Jareds roomate alpha modes him on mic
https://discord.gg/QjhB7M46jx https://www.reddit.com/r/dudesrus/
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Transcript
Johnny Cash Tribute
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello, I'm Johnny Cash. It's dudes or us. Let that choppa sing for our big soldier Luigi. The glove does not fit, you cannot convict, let's go.
Morality of Celebrating a Murderer
00:00:50
Speaker
was the best guy around What about the people he murdered? Was murdered!
UK Windstorm Warning
00:01:01
Speaker
There's a tense powerful windstorm headed towards the United Kingdom, of Wales, England, Scotland, Ireland for Saturday, December 7th and Sunday, de December 8th, 2024. Who is this guy? He's got like every meme ever produced on the internet. He can knock us out with his memes. And I do, I have tons of memes. I'll just keep memeing them to death until they just surrender.
00:01:27
Speaker
Right now.
00:01:42
Speaker
Hey, Beverset, check out what I'm having for dinner. A lopper. Mmm, get me some Burger King, baby! Do not be a pervert near me. It's really bad. Do not do that, guys.
00:02:01
Speaker
I'm here in the freezing cold getting free chicken sandwiches. I mean, there's no, there's no I mean, it's chicken. Do not worry about this week.
Midweek Encouragement
00:02:15
Speaker
You're gonna make it through it, and I'm here if you need me. Good night, my nigga.
00:02:22
Speaker
When you come in on Monday and you're not feeling real well, does anyone ever say to you, sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays?
00:02:30
Speaker
No. No, man. Shit, no, man. I believe you get your ass kicked saying something like that, man.
Going Live: Surprise Realization
00:02:44
Speaker
we're We're live on the podcast. Oh shit, we're live? The three of us and, um, we have our fourth mic. Jared's roommate is on. I'm letting them, I'm gonna let them into the, the recording right now. I can't even imagine anything worse. That actually should be awesome. Here he is.
Meet Jared's Roommate & Magic Cards
00:03:05
Speaker
I got some good questions for him. Hey, I'm Jared's roommate. What's up guys. I want to know where I should sell my magic cards.
00:03:17
Speaker
Oh, he can buy them from you. He deals and has the cards, but I don't want to sell. I want to get
Tangerine Blood Orange Spin Drifts
00:03:24
Speaker
top dollar for him. I'm not selling them to him for nothing. Yeah. Hey, everybody. It's Brendan. Brendan March of it's and I'm Jared's roommate. I drink grapefruit spin drifts. Actually, what we're on a tangerine blood orange kick right now.
00:03:44
Speaker
Dude, if you guys can ever find the Fiji Apple ones, those ones are elite. Could not find it. So the only way I could get the Apple one was when I looked was by going to the target in Quincy, which that's like, that's never going to happen. Probably a good target. Dude, those things were elite. But yeah, I haven't now. They must be um seasonal, too, because.
00:04:10
Speaker
Definitely seasonal, but definitely the best spin drift I've ever had.
Microwaving Plastic Debate
00:04:17
Speaker
Yo, this is Brendan Mantrovitz. I'm Jared's roommate. Yeah, Jared always be warming up plastic and shit in the microwave. But I tell him, don't be warming that plastic up. Jared, I need rebuttal on that. Bro, we've already talked about this. He eats the like focus meals. It's just like I'm an adult.
00:04:42
Speaker
No, I don't be. You got shit, bro. I don't be. Jeremy, Jeremy walk around the house in a beanie and shit. Jared, do you walk around your house in a beanie. Yeah. They like a temple. Is that his name? Yeah, temple. Do I have hair? Walk around in in Mosh clothes with Mosh and in the living room and shit. He'd be playing Mosh hero on the PSP.
00:05:13
Speaker
Jared, you're but you playing mosh hero on the PSP. Clean up your fucking clock. That clock's been there for two and a half years.
00:05:23
Speaker
How about that?
Clock Nostalgia and Humor
00:05:27
Speaker
What's up with the clock? Is it just disassembled on your it's coffee table? Well, I put it under the coffee table, but it's still there.
00:05:36
Speaker
Mm hmm. Why is it? Why is there a clock? That's like a throwback to like episode three, dude, and that clock is still there.
00:05:48
Speaker
I mean, I don't remember that at all. He did say you'd be wearing a beanie like microwave and plastic and shit. I want to wear a beanie. I just walked walking around in the house, beanie on only just to be a move. When the fuck did we talk about a clock?
00:06:07
Speaker
I feel like there used to be a segment where I just talked about shit my roommate did, like tinkering with the dryer and breaking it. He found a clock in the trash and was trying to rebuild it and then gave up. Then he just left it on your table. There's still a disassembled, partially reassembled clock. Factor meals, more like, more like non-factor, more like sodium meals. Could have gone a different way with that.
00:06:37
Speaker
Fact more like factor meals there we go We're back.
Podcast Mishaps & Jokes
00:06:44
Speaker
We're back. It's another episode on a weekly podcast. Oh, we've been recording this whole time yeah you're not say nwwardd did i Your roommate just left Good he didn't get you dude. Hopefully I'll leave that part in that's that's fine. We didn't it's fine. I Yeah, exactly. Well, another another week of nothing going on in America, am I right, guys? Yeah. Nothing at all to talk about. It's pretty weird. I can't really think of anything. Yeah, healthcare ah industry is pretty safe nowadays, am I right?
00:07:27
Speaker
Uh, I mean, I'm thrilled with my insurance. You know what they should, you know, ah you know, who the next CEO should be is the Frito-Lays CEO. Who is that? Uh, that's a good question.
Frito-Lay CEO Speculation
00:07:43
Speaker
John probably you liked John, Jonathan Frederick, but I bet his name is. Oh, you couldn't be more wrong. What is it? Is it like I be your running running kids or something?
00:07:59
Speaker
I think it's our old HR guy. no no wait dude
00:08:10
Speaker
That HR guy. Yeah. The one that allegedly received the one that allegedly received a green pepper and ranch pizza.
00:08:26
Speaker
it's the it's black Jenkins yes look click the link how come like at some point of these like black guys careers when they're black enough and successful they get a lazy eye like what's going on with that I think it's definitely oh my god That's not him, dude. It looks just like him. It looks just like him, but it's fine. His name's really similar, too. That's what I'm saying. He's one into hiding it. He just cut the S off the end of his name. That's the equivalent saying of going to Altoona from New York City.
00:09:06
Speaker
Yeah, but the senior vice president, they do have a Shimam Vakat in Parth Rival. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, they. oh Holy shit. Lazy eye and the the the gap between the front teeth. Holy insane gap teeth. How many markets he could probably fit a single of the the barbecue twisted ah Frito in there. Yes, he absolutely could. Yeah.
00:09:41
Speaker
Oh man, they probably have the best snacks though. Damn dude, my guy is fucking on top of it.
00:09:53
Speaker
That's so funny. What did you guys, what did you guys allegedly send the old CEO? Um, Frito pizza. Is that what you said? No, no, it was green pepper pizza. Oh, we said, we said that we did eat them too.
00:10:11
Speaker
Uh, he's the one who actually paid for it. He paid for it and took it. The other, the other guy sent him away. This, he at least paid for it. Uh, double lava cakes. I think it's
Domino's Prank Story
00:10:30
Speaker
the tracker.
00:10:32
Speaker
Yeah. So, uh, so we talked about this before. I don't know if it still applies, but at least a ah year or two ago, two years ago, You could, um, any, any online order on dominos dot.com under $50, you could, you could select to pay cash upon arrival. If it was over 50, they wouldn't let you do it. But as long as you, so we were kind of min maxing, what is the largest and most ridiculous order you can get for under $50. And yeah, it was like a, that pizza, I want to say double lava cakes, but maybe we only fit one.
00:11:09
Speaker
an order of uh wings no seasoning nothing bear yeah bear wings and then um they got a bunch of two liters yeah i think we did a fruit punch too i was trying to think about two liter you could get fruit punch of course we did that's probably what they saw and they were like yep we're paying for this he good for him The Domino's driver, they're like, we didn't order this. Domino's driver's like, okay. Yeah. Yeah. Clearly. Yeah. Right.
00:11:44
Speaker
You know what you do. You get the Sprite in the fruit punch and you mix them together. Just pay for it, please. That's pretty awesome that he just paid for it. I wonder if he was just like, I'm not dealing with this fucking shit. I'm just going to pay for this. So, yeah, that thought went through my mind. And then the other thought that went through my mind is he's got like kids. So you could picture him just being like one of these fuckers ordered take out.
00:12:10
Speaker
Which motherfucker ordered wings with no season?
00:12:17
Speaker
I've been working probably for Frito-Lay all damn day. You know, that probably caused such an issue in us apples. Which one of you fucking assholes ordered the dominoes? I swear to god, dad, none of us did it. ah One of you did it. Because there's a bunch of dominoes that you're sure of. A bunch of goddamn dominoes down here you better better own up to this shit.
00:12:40
Speaker
Uh, that's awesome. I wish I could remember the name I put on the order or as the, uh, email address, but Jarvis green house, obviously knew his name. So when the delivery driver was like, Oh, it's for this person, but God damn, that is my name.
00:13:01
Speaker
motherfu
00:13:06
Speaker
That's the best part. Cause you're like, who's the order for? No, you're at the wrong house. Who's the order for? Well, then they say the name. You're like, God damn it. That's my name. Well, that's me. Fuck.
00:13:21
Speaker
god damn what what is what it what do you even got there and they go through it's like i a ranch green pepper pizza hell no then they like get to the wings their eyebrows go up a little bit then they see the fruit punch in the back they're like all right how much is it
00:13:48
Speaker
Oh shit, that's I
CEO's Reaction to Pizza Prank
00:13:50
Speaker
forgot we did it to him too. hi This is a high level CEO ranking type of fellow guys. This guy still in the game, still touching elbows with ah some people that that suck the souls out of babies and inject themselves with crazy stuff. Big time. Yeah, they're on like the trading app that you can follow. or It's like famous people and politicians trading You can follow and do what they do. This guy's that type of guy and he got Domino'd right in his fucking head one day. Domino's right in your fucking head bro, you better pay for it.
00:14:24
Speaker
Then our other old boss that we did it to, that was a total dickhead, sent it back. Definitely argued with the Domino's driver. No, for sure. Video taped him and put him on next door. Because you can follow it on the app and he, the driver got there. was there met Yeah. It was there for like legitimately 15 minutes and 15 minutes at one house for a delivery driver is insane.
00:14:50
Speaker
And then the status changed to like, yeah but We've encountered a problem with your order. yeah A major problem. yeah That's mad funny. I'm not fucking, I didn't order this. It is in Arizona, so it's definitely some like Cholo kid where he's like, bro, you fucking ordered this. What do you mean?
00:15:15
Speaker
How's your name on it? You speaking all gay shit to me, bro? Your name's right there. Would you say your name was? Yeah, that's the name on the receipt. Look at the receipt, man. That's her name. Let me up there, bro. He has him like behind the gate into his front yard. No, don't come up here. No. This is private property. You're on my ring doorbell app. You're going to get put on next door. Get out of here. I don't eat that crap.
00:15:49
Speaker
what is it uh we have we've six lava come on excuse me i've been taking i've been taking fucking meetings from the jungle gym all day sir i've been taking busy teams meetings in in the middle of the fucking mall all day exhausted yeah
00:16:19
Speaker
I know this isn't my order because I'm doing Keto right now and I would never have ordered this. Excuse me. I was at the jump gym today with my children.
00:16:33
Speaker
I'll never forget though first time ah you guys met him before i and I was like how to go here like yeah, he like he mixes his ketchup and mustard together and I Was like he was saw his fingers yeah
00:16:54
Speaker
I was so pissed at our other boss. I was like, dude, you're fucking leaving and I have to deal with the guy who mixes a sauce together and sucks his fingers in public. Fuck, dude. What did he order to mix the sauce? Was it just a cheeseburger or something? Just like a cheeseburger and french fries. That's insane. to but who Who just don't do it in front of people. they already mean but tell youll Do it at home. Do whatever you want to do at home. Do it on a solo order, like just when you get comfortable with people.
00:17:24
Speaker
Did he would you put both of them on this plate plate and then mix to whip them together? Yep, whipping them like pancakes like it's totally normal There's more so the fact that he was just like sucking the sauce off his fingers dude um um um nu um i already get the sauce on no i I just remember I looked at old boss And I wanted to be like, is this fucking serious? Is this not the person you picked? it's what Would have been a crazier move if he just was the the strategy where people put the ketchup directly on the fries. Yeah, would have been better, honestly. That's true. Sometimes that's the move. Maybe he would have just could have just used like a fork and knife to eat it. Oh, man.
00:18:19
Speaker
Can I get a, can I get a cheeseburger without the burger on it, please? Thank you. Just bring the ketchup and and mustard. I'm going to mix them together. Maybe it was a test to everybody around him. I was so pissed about it and I brought it up to, I brought it up to other boss and he was like, I don't even even notice. Oh man. And then I got mad at him. Then he told me I was peculiar and I was like, you fucking know that you traveled with me for like a year.
00:18:49
Speaker
You can't mix those two together, dude. If you mix those two together, you you better chime in on the discord and defend yourself. Speaking of that, who is who we got here? We got Patrick C. And we got Hank Chill, James Bantam, and the newest member,
00:19:12
Speaker
were Zeppo4915. Shout out, Zeppo. that's a prove yourself that you're not a bot the hello I've been grinding just kind of keep got to keep grinding sick kind of was I was like is this guy a bot but I believe he's a real person ah yeah definitely wow he's on discord since 2016 holy shit that's one of the OGs that's the OG move I've also been on discord for a long time. Holy shit. That's impressive. Shout out to all the big dogs out there. Thank you for listening to us in the holy grail of members and staying on the discord. Yep. Join the discord so that we can docs you live on our podcast. No,
00:20:03
Speaker
no I, uh, I'm not going to dox it unless you, unless you challenge me, I won't dox you because unless you say you can't dox me. Think again, pal. I doxed the guy that did not have wifi at his house. And made fun of him so much he left. Then we haven't confirmed that's why he left.
00:20:25
Speaker
ah he He asked for it. If you ask for it, you're going to get it. That's obviously why I left. You guys made fun of him for like an hour straight on via text. It was for multiple days.
00:20:39
Speaker
He started. He didn't start it. That's very calls faggot and stuff. He'd get drunk and call the Edward on there. So you get what you get. Yeah, he was going to get banned anyways. If we ever were going to blow up, would a he's going to fucking Luigi Mangione me outside of my house one day.
Luigi's Innocence Debate
00:21:02
Speaker
That's right. He's going to find your house.
00:21:07
Speaker
He just beat his ass.
00:21:11
Speaker
He was really fat and unathletic. I don't think you have much to worry about. He probably still listens. Yeah, I like this. Why doesn't he listen to this?
00:21:28
Speaker
What some timing, some timing, guys. Yeah. So Luigi did not do it. Obviously, a guy's way too smart. I think he already did. Very specific schizophrenic, huh? What do you think he did? He confessed. Oh, he did. Doesn't mean he's not a patsy dude. That's true.
00:21:54
Speaker
That is true. I watched the video. You guys see the video of him ah out of the getting out of the van and just screaming at the. Yes, it was awesome. I was like, I think I might have been corrected. My assumption said he is the some schizophrenia bug in him from family genes. I'm going to have to watch that. I haven't seen it. It's pretty good. I mean, you can. He's just yelling and and stuff, but you can tell you are intelligent as Americans. Yeah, he I mean, he's basically he's not. so He's like a ah RFK junior type guy. Kinda. He follows him on Twitter.
00:22:34
Speaker
I got a quick side note around RFK. They're doing the thing on Twitter where they're putting out like Don't, how dare you say this about RFK and just from his camp. It's just like showing all the articles where it's like, this guy's kind of a lunatic. And it's like, you got to trust Bobby. And it goes back to what I said, mad episodes ago. No one calls you Bobby. Stop it. Stop it. out when you really You only pull it out when you need it, bro. I call him Bobby. Everybody calls you RFK junior.
00:23:06
Speaker
No one calls you Bobby Junior, dude. you got can't you can't get You can't pull that Trump card whenever you need it. You can't call yourself JFK when you need it. Back to the back to the our God of Luigi. Well, he starts calling himself JFK. We know that there's an issue. ah my father My father was actually JFK. He wasn't my uncle. That's why I'm so angry all the time.
00:23:37
Speaker
So our guy went to went only 230 miles, 37 miles away in L286. Listen, I'm going to stick to what I said. If I went, if I was running away and I made it to Altuna, I would turn myself into. That's what I said. That's one of the shittiest places I've ever had the unfortunate experience of going to.
00:24:01
Speaker
Yeah. If you're a listener and you ah live in Altoona, fuck you. Yeah. Fuck you, dude. Stop listening. Turn off close Spotify or Apple podcasts right now. It sucks. Um, why didn't he go to fucking like anywhere in Texas that he would have blended in a little bit more because he also needed the big 286 miles.
00:24:25
Speaker
I don't know why but it's real. I saw the article it said it said a different number than what you originally said Jared's getting fake fake news 276 miles
00:24:52
Speaker
Yes. So, uh, and I saw on the McDonald's that he wore is the same exact mask in there too. Like an idiot. Cause that's what I mean. That's what I mean. It seems just seems like you want he won. He looked like a man who hadn't slept in two days. Any eyebrows. I mean, yeah, that's the thing is like you could have gone. I mean, it would have been better to go North than West.
00:25:22
Speaker
Uh, and if you're trying to like not get caught, you know, I get that he probably doesn't have anywhere to go, but like, don't be sitting in that public of a place, like just hanging out at a McDonald's on your laptop. Like, come on, man. I didn't realize there was so many people in Altoona, but.
00:25:44
Speaker
I still think that there's probably like 15 to 20 people that go to the McDonald's every day and he wasn't one of them. So the person was like, I was that fucking guy. He's wearing the same exact mask and the same e exact view of what everybody saw him with. What's what is crazy is if I, I mean, I can't imagine myself ever, ever being that person. Like if I during The days after the marathon bombing, was that like Starbucks and some guy walked in that looked like Jokar Zarnayev. I would in my head be like, man, that guy looks like Jokar Zarnayev. That sucks. Zero percent chance I'd ever call the cops. No desire to be that person. So I can't really figure out. I can't put myself in the head of the person who was like, whoa, that guy really looks like that guy from the news. I better call the police.
00:26:39
Speaker
Probably is somebody from Altoona. We've already established the people from Altoona, are like fucking retarded. Literally all fucking so retarded.
00:26:50
Speaker
ah So retarded. Like that was, that was eye opening to me of how shitty Pennsylvania is. That part of Pennsylvania? Yeah. I mean, like Pittsburgh was cool. Pittsburgh was all right. But then when we started driving towards Altoona, I was like, this is unbelievable.
00:27:09
Speaker
Yeah, it's pretty bad. Ah man, this guy blew it going in there with this mask. I'm looking at the image and it's just retarded.
00:27:20
Speaker
every boxing he's like hey i'm the guy who killed that guy he walks in carrying like the the uh divider in the taxi cab around him walking in the order of my coffee walks in with the gun out yeah with this the gun i did it with
00:27:41
Speaker
Ride some rides through the drive-thru on a e-bike and a gun in his hand It's like hey, give me get a black coffee and and a hash brown God damn it. It's crazy that this guy is like yeah, I need I need something to eat Could have picked anywhere. He's probably kicking himself that he didn't go to like a Dunkin or something around the corner
00:28:03
Speaker
If you had just gone to Pittsburgh, you would have just blended in, dude. Oh, I know. Why didn't go but go to a bigger city, bro? Shave your head. Fucking eyebrows. That's all they have to identify you on.
00:28:17
Speaker
shave the eyebrows. A million things he could have done. He could have just stayed in New York City and they probably wouldn't have caught him. That's true. No one would have snitched on him. Definitely not. Just the fact that he would have been in a, in a town with like, well, how many people live in New York City? Fucking a million people, boy more than that multiple McDonald's and Altoona. Which one was it?
00:28:44
Speaker
I don't know. I hate Altoona though.
00:28:48
Speaker
I think I found it on East Plank Road, is that the one? I'm looking it up on street maps. The address is on the receipt I sent you. is it that It looks like it from the street that it's the East Plank Road one, no? ah It is the...
00:29:09
Speaker
Yeah, 407 East Plank Road. There's a Sheets right across the street. You could have went to. There's a one. Sheets would have been way better because, or is that Wawa? No, Sheets is the one where you can just order a sandwich from a thing. You're never going to have to interact with a person. um McDonald's you can't do technically, but they probably saw them walk in with the weird mask.
00:29:31
Speaker
Yeah. And, uh, Wendy's has way better breakfast. Nah, actually, nevermind. I had to take that back, but we could've had a decent breakfast there. Why we're... Don't... God damn it, dude. that You're going too hard disguising yourself. No one wears a mask. You're going to bring attention to yourself.
00:29:50
Speaker
He's like, Oh, I still believe in COVID and he's in Pennsylvania. And they're like, the fuck? Yeah, exactly.
00:29:59
Speaker
That was a personal COVID mask on in here in fucking 15 years. Did he say anything where he was like staying that night before that or anything? Or was he just walking around? That's what I mean. The picture of him sitting inside the McDonald's, he doesn't look.
00:30:15
Speaker
He does not look like he slept. Maybe he slept on the bus to Altuna. He had such a good plan. Besides, this is where he drops the ball. You know what I mean? Yeah, it's ridiculous. You saw that everybody online loved him on some notoriety. i mean should it Well, whatever.
00:30:43
Speaker
I do think it's kind of like maybe funny is not the right word, but. like I'm sure that the and you know United Health Care CEO is a shithead, but he just gets killed in broad daylight and everybody just makes fun of him for a fucking week. Oh, yeah I mean. Yeah, it's pretty funny and like. That's all that like it's the Internet that's never going to go away. No, like even the Wikipedia article for him is going to have like a section of it that's like murder and
Jury Bias and CEO Murder
00:31:19
Speaker
aftermath. And it's going to be about how like after he was murdered, like Twitter and Reddit celebrated it. And like, who knows what'll happen with this case? Like there's a world you could imagine a jury. You like, how are you going to find 12 jurors willing to convict? Because you could, because like, if I'm on that jury,
00:31:42
Speaker
He's not guilty.
00:31:46
Speaker
You only need one person like that. And and they can keep they can try it again, but you you know what I mean? Like there's a chance he can't be found guilty. You just have, I mean, just based on the response, there's enough people who would be like, you know what?
00:32:04
Speaker
This was this was a net good for society. And like, yeah, his kids are going to grow up and like Google him and just see that everyone thought it was funny that he's dead.
00:32:17
Speaker
It's real. They probably won't end up as villains of some kind.
00:32:29
Speaker
What about this picture of him that he, uh, he pissed his pants and they took a picture of him. I know. Isn't that ridiculous? um He pissed his pants and they took a picture of him. Who pissed his pants?
00:32:48
Speaker
ah He must have been in the squad car from Madeline. Oh, the killer pissed his pants. I thought you meant that the guy who got killed pissed his pants like he died and he just pissed his pants and they're making fun of him for that. so definitely i that yeah it Whatever his name was, Brian Thompson or whatever definitely shit himself after getting shot. Yeah, of course Well, yeah, that's what happens Like I still need to know how he stalked that guy out to know when exactly he was gonna be coming outside and stuff He said in the manifesto ah It was simple social engineering so I'm assuming he just said like asked literally just like Was like oh I'm
00:33:35
Speaker
Mr. Thompson's secretary, I just, you know, like just did some fucking, you know what I mean? I'm going to tell you what happened.
Luigi's CIA Conspiracy
00:33:44
Speaker
The CIA was like, we don't need this fucking guy around here screwing up a good thing.
00:33:50
Speaker
And then they had Luigi go in and shoot him. Actually they had some CIA operative shoot him and then they had ah Luigi take the fall. e They found a schizophrenic kid and they were like, Hey, perfect. If you, if you tell everybody that you killed this guy, I will get you out of jail in like 10 years and then you can just do whatever knowing that they would never get him out of jail.
00:34:14
Speaker
Yeah, I don't think you have to make a deal with this because if you find a schizophrenic guy, you just let you let him take the fall. It's easier that way. They're like, hey, man. You should buy these drugs. And then they're like, actually, now that you've bought the drugs, you're going to go to jail forever if you don't take the fall for killing this guy. Yeah. So I get you. And we're going to your family is going to go to jail forever, too.
00:34:42
Speaker
A frame you from. Yeah. i't
00:34:49
Speaker
Basically, C.A.D., what is that? Social engineering, basic C.A.D., a lot of pads, computer data design, I think he I think he made the silencer, but I don't know if that's true.
00:35:11
Speaker
I wasn't working with anybody, definitely working with somebody, definitely working for one of the guys that was in the investigation of Brian Thompson dumping off all that stock. Yeah, that's the thing is like if you like he clearly wrote that after the fact, it's not like he wrote that beforehand. So he like wrote that on the bus to Altoona.
00:35:35
Speaker
And if you're even vaguely aware of what's happening on the media, no one thought this had. This was anything but a lone gunman, so the fact that he was like no one else was involved here is like basically saying. I did not act alone. That's like a thing that they're like when you confess, you have to you have to say this specific thing that you acted alone.
00:36:01
Speaker
I don't understand the significance of having a backpack full of Monopoly money. Everybody keeps talking about but like it was something cool. but as athletes I mean, it's got to just be some like riddler bullshit, right? He's just doing it's like a troll fucking. Like if you like he dumped the backpack, which I also don't get that because he had a backpack with him. In.
00:36:25
Speaker
He had two backpacks. Yeah. He had a backpack with him in Pennsylvania. So he like had a backpack in the backpack, like, and he had multiple coats. I don't know. that that That level of it is weird where you're like, he had multiple coats and multiple backpacks. Um, but clearly he knew he dumped it in, in central park, knowing they would find it. He had a perfect escape route. Yeah.
00:36:54
Speaker
Probably could have could have just fucking taken a car, got all the way up to the Canadian border and just walked over. and don't You wouldn't even have to go that far. Like you get to Like, yes, but I also think dark towns are too small and stick out like a sore thumb. ah But it's not. I mean, it's Canada. It's not like he wouldn't be also be spotted there and extradited. Mm hmm. But I still think you could like, yes. You should have went to Alaska and got on the land bridge and walked to Russia. Cross the mausoleum to. Yeah.
00:37:37
Speaker
um What?
00:37:43
Speaker
Yep.
00:37:46
Speaker
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. I hate this. Why did you get so angry, dude? All you did is say your name. Yes, dude. Goddamn it. It's a spidey single. It's spidey to fuck. He's the alpha of that house, dude. No way. Jared! Jared!
00:38:09
Speaker
It's a book. What are we talking about? Dude, you drank all the tangerine spin drinks.
00:38:22
Speaker
You know, six of those are mine, dude. would you cut that shit out after 8 p.m. can't be smelling that stuff when I'm sleeping can't smell that when I have my sleep goggles on damn that was a crazy interaction to hear I hate that I hate it
00:38:53
Speaker
Did he yell that from across the house? ah Yeah, I think so. That's awesome. You're burning incense, too. i will It doesn't matter. That's so gay. There's like a piece of wood on my desk that I was setting on fire, but it's fine. Yeah, right.
00:39:15
Speaker
How was that? Why are you always yelling at you because you're burning incense? Yeah, that's interesting.
00:39:23
Speaker
Are you burning one of the pink incense sticks digging in stone? Yeah, I just gotta get in the zone. That's so funny, dude. Is it Nogchompa? No, it literally is a piece of wood.
00:39:39
Speaker
Oh man, dude. He could've embarrassed you so bad, dude. That's so funny.
00:39:49
Speaker
Dude, get your fleshlight out of the dishwasher, bro. Come on, dude. Come on, dude. Put it in the fridge after and fucking cool it down and then you fucking bring it in here and forget it, dude. Come on.
00:40:07
Speaker
You can't be smelling that shit, dude. Come on. on
00:40:19
Speaker
I'm sorry Jared. That's fine.
00:40:25
Speaker
is ruined a great a great segment that we're fucking focused on for once but so like doing the bit earlier and everything holy shit bitches bitches came to life yeah yeah booking this had Fucking dominoes banging down the door out here, dude. What the hell?
00:40:59
Speaker
I gotta mute my mic. Oh, my God. Oh, fuck. Oh, man. Oh, man. Are you still burning the wood? No. I should burn it even more now. Let's burn it harder. Talk to me. This is fucking up my podcast. Yeah, we were in a good segment. What about the fucking clock, bro? Probably heard us talking about that. You're in trouble, dude.
00:41:38
Speaker
oh My god to the feds I'll keep this short because I do respect what you do for our country My roommate burning a piece of wood on his desk over and over and speaking to me on his podcast is fairly trivial For this reason Brian Thompson had to go um don't get to talk About this last week's I fell asleep but
00:42:07
Speaker
How fucking stupid were people to think that aliens were going to come down? Because some guy who who modeled something with AI in 2004, which doesn't even really make sense. I don't think the AI technology, the same. yeah Yeah, sure, dude, that's just like some fucking ridiculous copy pasta shit that somebody made up. Yeah, I know. So yeah, he used the AI in 2004 to say the tsunami was coming. No one believed him.
00:42:38
Speaker
He just, he just happened to be the guy who figured out AI. Yeah. He's Asian. Was AI even a thing in 2004? Do you remember smarter child?
00:42:50
Speaker
Yeah, hell yeah, dude. I talk to smart child all the time. That was an AI though, dude. Smart child, that was basically AI. No. That was just a chatbot. How is that any different from what we have now? We also we don't have AI now either. We just have a better chatbot. Because they have predictive modeling now. Smart child. Smart child could predict.
00:43:10
Speaker
now its on old
00:43:13
Speaker
It was a she,
AI and Smart Child Program Nostalgia
00:43:14
Speaker
dude. She was always hot. She was always getting super hot and horny every time I talked to her. This little kid on my computer being like, whoa, what the hell, smart child? Smarter child didn't know about this tsunami.
00:43:30
Speaker
Whoa, smart child, dude. Check my way message. Stop. Plus, like, people were were all freaked out about it. But like, if it was supposed to happen on whatever, let's say it was the seventh or whatever day it was supposed to be,
00:43:44
Speaker
And he woke up in America. It's already the next day in Australia, right? It's already tomorrow. They already know what's coming. So they should already know. Well, it has to happen at a specific time, dude. Has to happen in America. Yeah. Yeah, that's what I thought. Fucking racist. I mean, it's the only important place in the world.
00:44:11
Speaker
What, the aliens are going to invade Azerbaijan? Maybe. No, they're definitely not going to New Zealand. oil If they were scoping out the world, you've got to figure they scouted the they scouted Earth before they invaded. Yeah, they're goingnna you don't think they'd take the place that has all the oil? They don't know. They don't know. They've probably to them oil to the yet of them oils like piss. They don't care.
00:44:37
Speaker
They're going to look at like who's got like the dopest stuff. They're going to go that area there. That one's legit. America has a dopest stuff, not those crazy Middle Eastern countries. They have fucking people who have like tigers and shit living in their house. I don't I mean in the in the alien scouting earth from above what they are going to see from above. Yeah, it's like. They're going to fly above and they're going to see a bunch of pyramids in the desert and they're going to be like, that's dank. That's where we're going. They're definitely not going to look at America and be like, oh, yeah, it's like, no, you're going to be like, that place is tight. That place looks cool. They're going to look in New York City and they they actually predicted that this dude was going to kill
00:45:22
Speaker
uh, whatever his name was and that it was going to dominate the news. So they've moved it. It's next week. Oh, they think the aliens decided not to land because the CEOs. Oh, yeah. I mean, that kind of thing's going to happen every few weeks or whatever. Or and every like couple of years, they're going to be like, now it was actually the prophecy said it was now, actually. Yeah. We looked at the mine calendar again and the mine calendar actually says end of days is is is 2032. Oh, we didn't carry the 10. Oh, fuck.
00:46:02
Speaker
So make sure you buy colloidal silver before then.
00:46:13
Speaker
Fuck off. me
00:46:18
Speaker
yeah attitude's all changing out dude come on don't get it don't start giving us attitude i
00:46:31
Speaker
fuck because that's man can start tiny fires on his desk in his own house oh my god it's crazy you can smell it from that far away god forbid god forbid a man lights a little bit of fires on his desk what do we talk about stop knock you off
00:47:02
Speaker
Oh man. Man, man. You pissed him off, dude. He was on the pod earlier and everything. He genuinely smelled it and was afraid the apartment was on fire. I guarantee you that. He put his sleep helmet back on after that and went back to sleep.
00:47:22
Speaker
My god You think is a picture is a room being like? What's the guy's name with the the the lead nerd and grandma's boy? I Was gonna save like Nick Swartz and a grandma's boy where he's got the fucking car bed George roommate has that contraption with all screens around him and stuff you want an understanding so you don't have robot ears um He has like a pretty normal dude room. i I don't know how I'm not like a PC gamer So I don't know how common this is. I guess pops you can let me know he does have foot pedals
00:48:02
Speaker
Oh, what the hell racing games or something? I don't know. The fuck seems insane to me. Whatever. If I ever got into a game that I needed to have foot pedals as like and as like ah buttons to use, I think that's taking a hobby too far. Maybe plays mech warrior. No, he only plays. No, that's not true. He plays some other stuff.
00:48:30
Speaker
Played like ghost of Tsushima, I guess. You got to get on his ass tomorrow about something. I got to get him back for that. Yeah, I'm going to.
00:48:44
Speaker
Oh, man. Guys. You should just light a fire now just on fucking. did Just out of principle. Just out of principle, exactly. Now you have to light a fire in the house.
00:48:59
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, don't worry about it. It's just my insun stick and that actually catches on fire. That would be funny. Oh man, dude, that is so good. It was so through such off topic right there. That's so funny.
00:49:17
Speaker
Jared, do you have any any other good tidbits on Luigi? man Is it Mangione? Is it Mangione? Yeah, Mangione. i No. No, man.
00:49:33
Speaker
he's a hard boy on what No, I'm fine. I just don't have any other. ah I think we covered everything is fucking.
00:49:48
Speaker
Piss picture, manifesto. He's trying to not get extradited to New York City, even though I mean, i i I guess if I were him, I'd be I would be afraid that I would get killed on the way. ah You're going to go to Rikers Island, though. It sucks, dude. True. That's the hellhole. He's going to commit suicide by shooting himself in the head twice.
00:50:12
Speaker
Correct. do we Do we think that he's going to fucking ah he's definitely going to commit suicide. Well, that's like what I said earlier is like if you are if you are the you know, if you're the police state slash, you know, rich people.
00:50:34
Speaker
you know that there's a good chance he doesn't get found guilty because the i odds of finding 12 jurors who would convict is pretty slim, I think, especially in New York city. So the only way to, from their perspective to ensure quote unquote justice would be that yeah, he you think yourself and i'm guilty because what they, I mean, they have the gun and everything, right?
00:50:58
Speaker
Well, it would be like basically jury, not well not jury nullification because you'd need a unanimous verdict. But you would you would only need one person on that jury to be like, yeah, like to in their mind be like, yeah, this guy is definitely guilty, but I'm not going to convict or I'm not going to vote to convict because I think he did something good.
Juror Beliefs and Verdicts
00:51:16
Speaker
Right. Like you as a juror can vote however you want. That's true. Get in trouble. So it's like if you if you're just a person who's like I think it was a good thing that he killed that CEO. Just vote not guilty. What can they do?
00:51:37
Speaker
That's true. It's crazy. You can just print a gun like that. I didn't even, I mean, I knew a ghost gun was, but it's crazy that you just print a gun nowadays. hey Why don't we all just print guns and hang out with them? Uh, we would need a 3d printer. Wave them all around.
00:51:58
Speaker
You have a 3D printer in your house somewhere, dude. You guys should look hard enough for it. It's around there, probably. Actually, you wouldn't even have to print it. You could just buy all the components to a gun and build it. That's true. Because nothing is considered a firearm until you actually like put it together. so Is that why it jammed on him? because he put the Or is it because he put the silencer on it? I think it's probably because it was made of.
00:52:26
Speaker
plastic. It was a plastic three d printed gun. No, I didn't realize it jammed on him, but he did try to kill the guy in Walmart or where the fuck he was. No. So if you watch that, there's a video of it. ah So if you watch the video, he gets one shot off. um All I need is one hits the guy in the back.
00:52:49
Speaker
And then you can see the gun jam and he spends probably like a second or two clearing the the jammed bullet. And then he gets another shot in the guy's leg and then he runs off. So he. I think he got. Spent two and and then one got discharge or not, you know, one got jammed and just like like there was three bullets and he wrote things on him and two. ah I think he had intended to shoot the guy with all three bullets because he wrote words on him.
00:53:19
Speaker
But one of them didn't actually fire. That's again, he fucking wrote words on the society monopoly money. Such a silly guy like fucking shot the guy in the head. I didn't realize that the guy died from getting shot in the leg. What a fucking pussy died from the shot in the back. Yeah, he got shot in the back, stumbles against a wall and then is like sliding down the wall when ah when suspect shoots him again. And I think he was aiming higher, but as he was falling, he had his leg or something. Did he fucking get them through the back into like the lung or the heart or something? You just die from a 22 round hitting you in the leg. Maybe he was in on it. Maybe he's not really dead. Yeah, he's got all this healthcare care claims in right now.
00:54:18
Speaker
But that bullet just said like, you're a fag on it. You get all three out de for it to make sense. um Oh, that's my new conspiracy is this guy's not even done. He asked the guy to do this.
00:54:36
Speaker
so that he couldn't charge for all his insider trading. I totally acted alone. That's crazy. All these fucking stories, whether it's like mafia hit men or are people regular shooting where the gun jams and they fucking have to bail on the hit. This kid first time committing a crime and he can clear the chamber in like point five seconds or whatever every time between shots while under a stream, extreme adrenaline. That's nuts.
00:55:06
Speaker
Hmm. That's what I'm saying. These guys are shooting guns and fucking committing crimes all the time. The gun jams and they can't unjam it in time. and This guy fucking just cool with a witness that's like three feet away from him, staring at him and he fucking just still, boom, clears the jam immediately. He starts firing again. That's nuts.
00:55:27
Speaker
Yeah, well, ah before they had caught him, the like detective in charge of the case in New York was talking about him like he was a fucking zodiac killer. He was like, this is clearly a criminal who knows what he's doing. He's toying with us. He wants to show us that he's in charge.
00:55:44
Speaker
like this he like he He's proficient with a weapon. He's been dropping clues. He wants to bring them the the public into his crime to show to show us that he's in charge or he's in charge, not us. like you're And then you find out it's this guy who's just kind of like a schizophrenic dude super who really likes Ted Kaczynski.
00:56:11
Speaker
I got another conspiracy that I just cooked up. The mayor of ah New York City is under investigation, right? For taking money from Turkish people. That's right, right? Yeah. So he certainly needed to get the heat off of it. So he paid, he and this other, whatever the United healthcare care guy is, they paid Luigi to allegedly shoot the guy. That's why he only shot him in the leg. The one and i shot him in the back. on end that one never won and
00:56:43
Speaker
okay well you could have been wearing a bulletproof vest. Yeah, exactly. And now this this guy's dead. Right. Oh, have you seen the body? Do you ever? I don't know. I told you Osama bin Laden was dead and they showed you some fake picture of it. ah No, I get that. But in any like murder, they don't they're not like here's his fucking dead naked body in a morgue just to confirm for you that he's actually dead.
00:57:15
Speaker
I don't know, dude. I haven't seen anybody.
00:57:22
Speaker
I think that it was the mayor of New York City. He needed to get the heat off of them. What is this solve, though? He needed a big win. That doesn't fix any of the other shit. Yeah, well, nobody's going to care about him anymore.
00:57:43
Speaker
He's like Rudy Giuliani just cleaning up the streets. Stop and frisk is about to be a thing again in New York City. No stopping first program. Yeah, it's coming back just in case just in case there's a fake gun. A real fake gun, I guess, but it's only for white guys, though.
00:58:06
Speaker
They don't want anybody. They don't want anybody getting shot in the leg. You look like an upper class white guy. We're going to stop. Stop you and search your bag for a plastic gun.
00:58:22
Speaker
I think that's what happened. That's fucking crazy. You had the plastic gun. You could have burned it. Could have literally. Could have fucking melted it in half and thrown it down a cigarette.
00:58:34
Speaker
And Altoona too, you could have disposed of everything and they would have fucking... What an idiot, dude. What do you think you... If the if they called him in as a person of interest, immediately getting arrested, he's like, I did it. And I'm pissing my pants right now. Lots of chicks think I'm hot, I did it. Oh my God. Who looks cooler? This guy or our our boy, Jokar Shlyanov?
00:59:02
Speaker
We need to update the picture of, uh, of Zokar. Cause he looked way cooler than this guy. He had a polo hat on backwards. This guy had piss pants. Zokar fought it off in a, in a boat battle in Watertown. This guy car took like 40 bullets and lived. yeah to like his own brother i over dude And then he fucking sketched in his manifesto into a boat yeah he wrote it in his own blood yeah that guy ra Dude that guy's up that guy's battle fucking battled it out. there There's no Does he didn't piss his pants once? Didn't I mean as far as we know didn't piss his pants and they certainly would have let us know if he did We found him in the boat. He was
00:59:46
Speaker
His pants were full of his own shit. Can barely stand the smell. Especially Boston Cubs. Yes. That would be the one fucking loser. yeah He had smeared the shit on his own face. He was crying. He was crying. it The only part of his face we could see that wasn't covered in shit was from the tears washing the shit away. Because he cried like a little bitch. Yeah, he's crying. He died like a dog. He died like a dog. He was gay.
01:00:26
Speaker
Wait, what? Where's the up-to-date picture of this kid? Of Jokar.
01:00:39
Speaker
What the fuck is this? What are you seeing? I can't read it because it's, uh, yeah, I can't read it cause it's a Boston Herald article, but it's just a picture of Zocar next to Diddy.
01:00:55
Speaker
why It's a Howie car article. It says, so the title's just, nobody asked me, but Dot, dot, dot. And it's joker next to Diddy. And I can't read any of the text of it because I'd have to subscribe. So I'm assuming the tower is probably just like a hey, if you if you want to give Zarnai of the death penalty, you probably. We should give P Diddy the death penalty. I actually have no idea. That's crazy. I was hoping there was some connection.
01:01:31
Speaker
You see Jay Z got accused of raping a girl with P Diddy and then he was like, I'm actually going to sue you. He sued them? Yeah, that's crazy defense. He was like, I didn't do it. And that's defamation. So I'm going after you. Oh, shit. I mean, I guess that's what you have to do is clap back hard. It's like when someone calls you racist and like the only thing you can say is I'm not racist. And that just sounds so fucking like like there's no defense to that. Does your mom know you're racist?
01:02:06
Speaker
well fuck
01:02:18
Speaker
yeah into jail killed by the state ah executed him Uh, yes. Wasn't his last word something nuts? I don't know. I raped Diddy. Diddy fucked me at the OKC bombing. I raped the Raper. Timothy McVeigh's last words. Timothy McVeigh's final words were handwritten copy of William. Are you not burning into this?
01:02:52
Speaker
handwritten copy of William Ernst Henley's poem Invictus which he gave to the prison warden before his death the poem the title translates to unconquerable in latin some of the poem lines and i don't know it's just a fucking poem what were they actually you want to read the whole poem No, it's a poem. He didn't say anything. He wrote a poem. Oh, god damn it.
01:03:25
Speaker
ah just i
01:03:31
Speaker
This kid might get out in like 25 years. if he They'll probably get him. like he's not good I don't think he'll do life for this, honestly. I guess it's premeditated, so maybe he will. Yeah. But again, i'm I'm skeptical that you get a jury that... He could claim insanity.
01:03:49
Speaker
Yeah, I don't think that would work. He just seems to believably like. Well, lasted he's like vaguely Middle Eastern looking he could just claim racism. He's extremely Italian. I didn't do it. My name is the thing. That's the thing you find you. You find a jury in New York City that doesn't have one Italian on it. And if it does, he's not voting to convict.
01:04:16
Speaker
Mmm, they all they can't be on the jury. They're all felons. Am I right guys? the I Am the master of my fate I am the captain of my soul Timothy McVeigh Gay yeah it's pretty la I mean he wrote a poem he wrote a poem pretty gay All right, well we're at an hour this is great episode guys I
01:04:47
Speaker
Jared, any last words?
Closing Remarks
01:04:49
Speaker
Yeah, no, we're good.
01:04:52
Speaker
ah no fucking
01:04:57
Speaker
Fucking... Chop his fucking head off. Don't you ever fucking talk to me when I record anything. Oh, my God.
01:05:13
Speaker
He came at your neck, bro.
01:05:21
Speaker
The focus means it makes you fuckin' work a lot, dude. Good.
01:05:29
Speaker
All right. right. That's it. That's it from us. Shout out to Hank Chill. Shout out Patrick C. Shout out Fanny Dantum. Shout out to Zeppo. Shout out to Big Dog Zeppo. Thank you for locking in. Thank you for joining the Discord. Thank you for showing up on the Discord. Everybody join the Discord and talk to us every day, all day. We're here for you.