Transcript
Chef Mike: Boom. We're recording. We're live. Boom. We're live.
dedhamfag: We are... on. It's on. It's on.
Chef Mike: It's on.
Chef Mike: Significantly better than anything that ever has Iresa in it. Honestly.
dedhamfag: That's our boy Darius My Autism Star Darius King King of Stimming 1 million followers Holy shit
Chef Mike: King Darius.
dedhamfag: darius king of stimmy one million followers holy shit
Chef Mike: That's out of control.
dedhamfag: He's staring. And this is him going live on Instagram for the first time by himself, basically, from the beginning. It's like at about, i don't know what mark this is. Let's see.
dedhamfag: Like 35 seconds, he just does a shark stare into the 24 seconds. Stares into the camera. Yeah. These sharks.
dedhamfag: It looks like a shark looking into the camera. Dude, it's terrifying.
dedhamfag: Dude, how about that? That screenshot that I sent you of that?
Chef Mike: Oh yeah.
dedhamfag: Did you get scared of it?
Chef Mike: And then, and then the Powerpuff Girls t-shirt.
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: She's got the best t-shirts always.
dedhamfag: Did you get scared of of that?
Chef Mike: I was worried because I hadn't, I hadn't seen the video when you sent it.
dedhamfag: Staring down the barrel.
Chef Mike: So I was like, something's going on.
dedhamfag: Oh, my boy was fucking concerned.
dedhamfag: Oh, man. What else is, uh, what's going on?
Chef Mike: You got, you got a hold of the phone.
dedhamfag: yeah ordered a bunch of, uh, a bunch of Cheez-Its on the phone.
Chef Mike: I did.
dedhamfag: No, he did.
Chef Mike: oh hell yeah. Can you imagine if you ah remember? Probably don't even do it anymore. ah At some point in Amazon's history of existing. ah They made these buttons.
dedhamfag: Oh, yeah.
Chef Mike: You could push to just automatically order something. So I got Doritos button and you push the button and it would automatically order you. Cool Ranch Doritos.
dedhamfag: Was it for everything or what? I thought and maybe they did make it for everything. and You just programmed it.
Chef Mike: Yeah, you could make ones you could program and then obviously like then brands.
dedhamfag: Here's like about bounty paper towel.
Chef Mike: Brands came out with them. Yeah, exactly.
dedhamfag: Yeah.
Chef Mike: Exactly. Then it was like, oh yeah, like Tide will give you this button and then when you push it, it orders Tide. ah There's no way they still make those because it feels like there was a lot of problems with that. But anyway, imagine Darius with those buttons.
dedhamfag: Oh my God.
Chef Mike: Darius with the Cheez-Its button.
dedhamfag: Egg button.
Chef Mike: Egg button. Absolutely true.
dedhamfag: I'll miss button. and
Chef Mike: Eggs and hummus, just pallets of eggs and hummus showing up at the house.
dedhamfag: Just pounds, pounds and pounds of it showing up over and over again. Yeah.
Chef Mike: Darius, did you order 16,000 Sabra hummuses?
Chef Mike: Darius, this is, you can't eat all this, Darius. It's going to go bad.
dedhamfag: I would love so I would love let me get, let me get a so a Delta eight button, right?
Chef Mike: Fuck yeah.
dedhamfag: Yeah. Yeah.
Chef Mike: It's just, that's called taking an Uber to the gas station.
dedhamfag: yeah Let me get, and me get a button that's just weed every time. I'm saying.
Chef Mike: Bro, you are still on Delta eight. Have you haven't even heard of Delta seven?
dedhamfag: Let me get button for gauges for my ears. And I just keep tapping the button and more of them show up.
Chef Mike: There we go.
dedhamfag: Then every day, new gauges.
Chef Mike: Yes. Yes.
dedhamfag: Yes, double zero gauges. It's funny. I was at the Market Basket I used to live near. 2018, I used to live near it.
dedhamfag: I went there the other day on lunch break. and the same Obviously, it's Market Basket everybody works at. Market Basket is a local grocery store to New England area.
dedhamfag: i think it's in New Hampshire, Massachusetts.
Chef Mike: yes yes
dedhamfag: One's in Rhode Island and maybe one in like, I think that might be it. And people worked there forever because they actually, from the stories I heard, there's like, yeah, yeah you worked there for 20 years and randomly they're like, here's a $80,000 bonus for you.
dedhamfag: They treat their employees well. It's like a cult.
Chef Mike: Yeah, they're a good company. I local family. Yeah. People like them.
dedhamfag: Yeah, but I was walking through and the same manager was walking around and he had those like, I have a job now and I had to take my gauges out years.
Chef Mike: Yeah.
Chef Mike: cat buttholes.
dedhamfag: That's how I recognized it.
Chef Mike: That's fucking awesome.
dedhamfag: Yeah, total so total punk dude.
Chef Mike: It's got gross fucking earlobes.
dedhamfag: Yeah, yeah, exactly. Like, dude, Jesus Christ.
Chef Mike: That's what I don't tell you. Do something.
dedhamfag: Get them repaired. Cut them off. Cut them off, man.
Chef Mike: That is what, like, you know, people ah would always be like, oh, but what about when you, are you going to like that tattoo when you're older? And, like, I feel like the answer to that is pretty much always like, yeah.
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: But ah ear gauges, very different story.
dedhamfag: Yeah, exactly. Very different.
Chef Mike: you not You're not going to be...
dedhamfag: Very bad.
Chef Mike: You're not going to be ah grandfather with double zero gauges.
dedhamfag: God, Jesus Christ.
Chef Mike: It's not a thing. It's not a thing. It's not a thing.
dedhamfag: No. God bless that guy working at Market Basket.
Chef Mike: He's probably, he's got a pension.
dedhamfag: yeah Yeah, he's doing very well.
Chef Mike: Doing better than I am.
dedhamfag: Yeah, he's doing very well for himself.
dedhamfag: God bless him, but at least at least we don't have those stupid fucking ears.
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: Hey guys, we're on all all streaming platforms here.
dedhamfag: um Yep. welcome Welcome in welcomecom on all the new listeners.
Chef Mike: Every single
Chef Mike: Or not on YouTube.
dedhamfag: No.
Chef Mike: I can't figure that one out.
dedhamfag: i did
Chef Mike: Everything else, though.
dedhamfag: I did upload audio of like two episodes ago to YouTube, but I never did anything on.
Chef Mike: Oh, really?
dedhamfag: Clearly, I just did it in a spur moment thing and then just never did anything.
Chef Mike: Well, that's kind of how the best ideas go.
dedhamfag: Never.
dedhamfag: ah um was We're on YouTube somewhere. If you just look us up, you know, look it up.
Chef Mike: Yeah, that's not that's not how our people are finding us.
dedhamfag: Now, however, however, you're finding us, send it into the Reddit or the discord and let us know. very cool to you some people ah found us just through recommendations on spotify and if you uh if a friend ever told you to don't listen to us please let us know that too because that's huge yeah
Chef Mike: That's pretty dope. If you are, ah so now that I have the accountant, I can look at the statistics. It's interesting. Um, if you are one of the 64 downloads we've had in the last month in suburban Washington, DC, what's the deal? Are you a spy?
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: What are you doing? That one piqued my interest. Why are you listening? Uh, also,
Chef Mike: a lot of people from Texas a lot of people from Texas um like 16 of the however many downloads from the last episode were were like three towns yeah outside of Houston
dedhamfag: How many? A lot of...
dedhamfag: Okay. Basically the comedy mothership, guys.
Chef Mike: and probably there yeah they're probably taking notes yeah not quite Austin i Austin would have made more sense to me um
dedhamfag: close Close enough.
dedhamfag: Yeah. it's just what the It's just them pinging over to Houston, but realistically they probably have us up on the the big screen.
Chef Mike: Yeah. And then, like I said, a lot, probably our most downloaded area is, is still LA, which is just lemon party listening to us over and over.
dedhamfag: Yes!
dedhamfag: Yes! Yeah.
Chef Mike: That's just, that's just that.
dedhamfag: but
dedhamfag: It's just Ben at his house having a manic manic episode listening to us.
Chef Mike: Yes. Yes.
Chef Mike: yes
dedhamfag: So, yeah. that's a and Let us know. we had big big... Surprisingly, like that that one of where it's Elon is in the title, we had a big outpour from. So...
dedhamfag: Whatever. We're getting our numbers back up. We're getting our listeners back up slowly, but surely.
Chef Mike: yeah we're Yeah, we're more than... We've like mostly recovered from our hiatus. Which is great.
dedhamfag: Yes. ah Yeah. I don't believe in the Iran bombings. was So don't know if we're going to, we're going to spend any much time on that.
Chef Mike: Yeah, we don't know it we don't have to talk about that.
dedhamfag: Cause everybody. know Yeah.
Chef Mike: My only thought...
dedhamfag: per Prayers. Thoughts and prayers.
Chef Mike: Thoughts and prayers. um Yeah, we don't have to talk about that. Went on for like a... Everything moves so fast now. Weekly podcast. You can't even... In between the time we last recorded, a war started and then ended.
dedhamfag: Yeah, thoughts and prayers. we don't We don't like to get in. We don't want to say the wrong thing on this podcast, first and foremost, you know. We don't want to offend any anybody.
Chef Mike: Yeah. God forbid any
Chef Mike: anyone god forbid anyone jewish with sponsorship money misconstrued
dedhamfag: is a clean This is a clean podcast here.
dedhamfag: God, shit, fuck.
Chef Mike: anything we said because that's not what that's not who we are
dedhamfag: Oh, shit.
dedhamfag: that's that's whose' yeah That's why we haven't gotten one sponsorship yet.
Chef Mike: conversely god forbid anyone iranian with sponsorship money because we'll also take that
dedhamfag: Yeah, we'll fucking gladly take that. Yeah, exactly.
Chef Mike: You want...
dedhamfag: We'll bomb you with good ad reads.
Chef Mike: you
Chef Mike: Al Shabab aluminum tubes and and uranium centrifuges, if you need a sponsor, we will do it.
dedhamfag: I ran. I know you're depleted on it. So if you give us any, maybe some blue apron ads, we could maybe point you in a direction of some extra uranium floating around out there.
Chef Mike: a
Chef Mike: They definitely. I know we said we're not going to talk about it and we're not going to talk about it. ah Here's the thing. this has been This has been going on for like 20 years.
Chef Mike: I remember Iran shit and obviously longer, but I remember Iran shit in the 90s. I remember Iran shit in like 1992.
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: Maybe not. i was I was like four then, but I remember it in the 90s. And we've been talking about them having nukes for since then or like trying to make nukes. ah They either already have and they're just like buried in a mountain or they know they could get bombed at any time and they figured out a way to like make sure the important stuff doesn't get damaged.
Chef Mike: Like we drop bombs on them, but they knew they were coming and they hit a button and like the fucking core of the shit like falls into a chamber and is protected.
dedhamfag: yep
Chef Mike: That's what I think. I, I, I, we obviously I'm sure have good intelligence and bomb the right sites and everything. I just have to imagine they know ah all the specs of a bunker buster and like know how to make sure that the important stuff isn't actually destroyed.
Chef Mike: So take that how you will.
dedhamfag: Maybe maybe i ran put in all but hit all of their their bombs and stuff. into They put them over the border into Iran.
dedhamfag: Oh! I love Israel.
Chef Mike: the
dedhamfag: i love Israel so much.
Chef Mike: they just put a big burka over them Benjamin Netanyahu please come on the podcast
dedhamfag: I love Israel. Sponsor us, please.
dedhamfag: Venmo, send us a Venmo on our page. Yes. Yeah. Modest Yahoo, please come on the podcast, please.
Chef Mike: we uh unlike New York that will said they, that guy said he'd arrest you. If you came to New York, we won't.
dedhamfag: Who said that? A guy said, I'll rest ah Benjamin, whatever, e if he comes there.
Chef Mike: Yeah. The guy who won the mayor primary, what's his name?
dedhamfag: No way.
Chef Mike: Uh, yeah. The middle Eastern guy who won like yesterday. I'm going get his name wrong. So I can't say it. Mongey aunt. Nope. it Mangiani? No, that doesn't sound.
Chef Mike: Oh, that's the that's the that's the guy that shot.
dedhamfag: Mangione. Yeah. yeah
Chef Mike: I'm not that
dedhamfag: If Louie Mangione comes here, I'm going to fucking arrest him.
Chef Mike: guy. Hold on. zo Oh, Zoran Mamdani.
dedhamfag: Yeah. Heard good things.
Chef Mike: We're not going to talk about but goingnna talk about that, but you can look up the... None of us live in New York. You can look up the New York mayoral race if you want, but that guy won. Or that guy at least beat Cuomo in the primary, which is a great sign at the very least.
dedhamfag: Dude, that guy, that's the president of Israel?
Chef Mike: That's him.
Chef Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
dedhamfag: That guy fucking rocks.
Chef Mike: He's pretty chill.
dedhamfag: This guy get fucking rapped.
Chef Mike: um All right. One last thought, and then we can move on about this Iran thing, is that ah a thing that we'll do, America specifically, we'll do when any this, and it's not even Iran specific, because we do it when when we like bomb Syria and everything.
Chef Mike: The news gets like super fucking hard whenever we like drop a bomb somewhere like you'll you'll have even like on msnbc they'll be like our beautiful b2 bombers left missouri and and they have like graphics showing like a map of the united states and like the b2 bomber like with the path they took and you're like i get it i get they flew in a line from missouri to iran you don't need to show me a graphic like they've look at these
dedhamfag: Oh, yeah, I know. Yeah.
Chef Mike: red triangles going over the Atlantic ocean. You're like, I figured that that's what planes do, but I guess, but there, and, and, and we are, you know, until, you know, like that three days later, there'll be like, Oh, actually Trump's a retard and they didn't actually blow up anything.
dedhamfag: Yep. Yes.
Chef Mike: But when it's happening, they're like, They're all super fucking hard about it. they're like They love it.
dedhamfag: yeah
Chef Mike: ah Nothing gets them off more than talking about war.
dedhamfag: yes
Chef Mike: and i just want to It's not like we bombed China. like ah no one There's no question in anyone's mind that if America wanted to wipe Iran off the face of the earth, they could, or we could.
Chef Mike: ah It just feels... I don't know.
dedhamfag: Yep.
Chef Mike: Being that excited, being that self-congratulatory when you're like, I don't know, like the Pacers beating High Point. Like, I don't know. It just feels... What are we bragging about? Of course, of course we can do that.
dedhamfag: they pull up the ah like um like ah like They pull up the same thing of when it's Christmas time and the Santa tracker comes on the screen.
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: They're like, Santa, it's over Cleveland right now. Check it out. he's got
dedhamfag: He's coming through. The B-52 bombers are coming over your house. Heads up. Heads up.
Chef Mike: Yep.
dedhamfag: If you go outside right now, you might be able to see them.
Chef Mike: Oh, the other insane thing that ah they said after the fact it's like is like, you know, you're like, oh, we didn't in my head. I'm like, you just yeah, we had like a few planes go out and they drop some bombs and like we've got good bombs. You don't need to drop a lot of them. And was done. It was like like, no, there was like three nuclear submarines, like 108 different aircraft, like a whole bunch of shit.
Chef Mike: They did like a bunch of shit. um so that's cool we can't have like
dedhamfag: Why? That is confusing. Why did they send them from Missouri and not, they don't have any in the, I don't know where the fuck, where they don't have anywhere closer.
Chef Mike: yeah that i i think i imagine you couldn't do it from like it would definitely make more sense to use like our air force base in fucking turkey or something but i think if you'd
dedhamfag: Is Missouri to Iran that far?
Chef Mike: Yeah, it's like 7,000 miles.
dedhamfag: Is it longer of a plane ride to than Hawaii?
Chef Mike: don't know.
dedhamfag: Longer than a plane ride to like Tokyo or something?
Chef Mike: probably Probably the same. To go to Iran?
dedhamfag: Yeah.
Chef Mike: No, it's closer than Iran, but it's still far. It's like all the way across the Atlantic, and then you go like well inland of fucking Europe, Africa.
dedhamfag: That's crazy. In the same plane ride they like are getting out of America, passing by Burger Kings and stuff, and then they get to Iran or or they're passing to other crazy places to get to Iran.
Chef Mike: Yeah, I think those I think those planes go like supersonic fast. So they also it it takes like 19 minutes.
dedhamfag: Yeah. They said 36 hours in the plane, though.
Chef Mike: No, that can't be right.
dedhamfag: Yeah.
Chef Mike: 36 hours.
dedhamfag: Yes, dude.
dedhamfag: That's what I said. That's crazy, bro.
Chef Mike: There's no way.
dedhamfag: Oh, my God.
Chef Mike: Did they circle around a bunch?
dedhamfag: Right? That's what I thought. i was like, well, I guess maybe bombing takes them a while.
Chef Mike: You'd think that'd be done pretty quick.
dedhamfag: That's a good point.
Chef Mike: You kind of can't chill very long. and I know that they're not like they got to have surface to air missiles. i At least I figure they can do that much.
dedhamfag: Yeah. True.
Chef Mike: But I don't know. I mean, congratulations, though.
dedhamfag: Why Oh, man. I just saw this. I had to get this point because I keep thinking. I keep thinking that Karen Reed's lawyer, Alan Jackson, I keep seeing him come up on my Instagram algorithm, and I keep thinking it's it's Tim Heidecker doing, like, one of his bits and dressing like him, which is fucking hilarious, dude.
Chef Mike: and
dedhamfag: I keep thinking that it is.
dedhamfag: That dude looks fucking nuts.
Chef Mike: Oh my God.
Chef Mike: Yeah. He's got a crazy ah head shape.
dedhamfag: There's no way. That guy is terrifying looking.
Chef Mike: Alan Jackson.
dedhamfag: Yes, Tim Heidecker in a suit. in
dedhamfag: Yeah, I mean, it's basically the same person.
dedhamfag: Oh my god, I gotta send... This is it. This is a good picture of him.
Chef Mike: a
Chef Mike: Oh yeah, dude, this one with these, with his goatee.
Chef Mike: That's very, that's very Alan Jackson.
dedhamfag: Let's see if like I can send this.
dedhamfag: Fuck, how fuck do I send stuff?
dedhamfag: I have to email it to you or I could text it to you. That's probably easier.
Chef Mike: Yeah. What? Can't put images in the chat?
dedhamfag: Yeah, I don't know. Why can't I put images in this fucking stupid thing?
Chef Mike: That's crazy.
dedhamfag: yeah We got to show the people this.
Chef Mike: Yeah, come on, man. Come on, Zencaster. I pay a monthly fucking rate and you can't even give me image chat.
dedhamfag: Come on, on Israel. Sponsor us.
dedhamfag: Would you sign yourself over to the, to Israel for like the podcast, like our rights over as a podcast to, if they, if they like gave us enough money every month to do the podcast and just live off of that?
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: no Yeah. no
Chef Mike: and Without a second thought.
dedhamfag: No doubt about it. Yeah, exactly.
Chef Mike: How do you honestly, how do you think um that they that is their strategy?
dedhamfag: Yeah, I'll be I'll fucking be the biggest supporter. I'll wear a fucking kippah to work.
Chef Mike: That's how they get like 100, like no matter what. they get They have like at least 108 votes in Congress on both sides of the aisle. like Organically, they have those on lock. And then you know they're going to get other ones just through you know random chants.
Chef Mike: But it's absolutely that. It's that strategy of like, oh, if we just pay you enough that no one else... you're not making enough money doing anything else to, uh, support your now lifestyle.
Chef Mike: Yeah. You're going to do whatever. i
dedhamfag: Come here. Come on. Help us out.
Chef Mike: yeah. Help us out.
dedhamfag: Let's go. well so We'll do ads for Israel. every fucking We'll do four ads per podcast. Israel, Brooklyn, whatever else stuff they want.
Chef Mike: Oh yeah.
dedhamfag: Anti-NYC mayor. We'll do that.
Chef Mike: Yeah, Zoran Mondani fucking how quickly we forgot 9-11, huh?
dedhamfag: You know, yeah. Zoramavdani more like Zoram...
Chef Mike: Who did 9-11? One of them, right?
dedhamfag: Moron Zomdani.
Chef Mike: There we go.
dedhamfag: Yeah, we're fucking back.
Chef Mike: Got him. Got him.
dedhamfag: We're here. We're fucking here.
Chef Mike: Got him.
dedhamfag: I was thinking, ah you know how everybody on Instagram reels now and TikTok is like, here's me working my job. And they're wearing those meta glasses so you can see like every fucking step of the day.
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: It's like an Amazon guy that does it.
Chef Mike: I hate it, but yes.
dedhamfag: I like the food truck guy that that I do do it. But I just thought, it was what if I just do that and I just rob banks and I just put it on Instagram?
Chef Mike: Surprise no one has. mean, I guess you, it's really easy to get caught doing that now.
dedhamfag: Yeah, I'd have to figure out some way to do That's just me fucking terrifying.
Chef Mike: Or,
dedhamfag: ter ah just like And you go to the channel, it's like like two scrolls down of content i already. ah God damn.
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: yeah
Chef Mike: Early days of the internet, you could absolutely see somebody like commit a crime. There'd be videos where some guy would like shoot his girlfriend. and You'd be like, is this real?
dedhamfag: yeah
Chef Mike: But everyone got autistic and figured out how to like, Be like, oh, well, the sun is at 26 degrees south by southeast. And the gables on that house are an architectural style indicative of the American southwest.
Chef Mike: So ah this occurred this occurred in in Tucson, Arizona.
dedhamfag: I think everybody would support me, though. be i get I bet you every all the trolls would be on my side, but this guy fucking rocks. This guy's robbing banks all day.
Chef Mike: Yeah, that's true.
dedhamfag: Best content. ah Probably the best content ever. Just like me. just like and you know Obviously, it's just you see like my hands and whatever down from it because I have the meta glasses on.
dedhamfag: That's just like, whats what's this guy doing?
Chef Mike: mm-hmm
dedhamfag: He's getting out of a car. Oh, shit. This guy's just me fucking putting someone's life in danger every day. Yeah.
Chef Mike: that'd be that yeah it'd be like those videos on planes everyone be like it's a guys it's a fake bank he it's a it's a set guys look you can clearly see led lights in the back that's a fake bank
dedhamfag: yeah
dedhamfag: Just slowly getting out of the car, slowly unwrapping a piece of paper from my pocket, sliding it on a desk, and then you realize, oh, shit, this guy's robbing a fucking bank right now on ah the Meta Glasses.
Chef Mike: Yeah.
dedhamfag: Like, subscribe, share, share to everybody.
dedhamfag: oh man.
Chef Mike: yeah So this is a day 14 of robbing a bank every day until, until I don't have to work anymore.
dedhamfag: yeah
dedhamfag: it's this is stupid fucking hack thing of instagrammers where they have to give everything rate uh wills fargo on 85th and north 7.8 everybody's got you know kind of crying and you know i got really got it into it ah you know took the real point break of and got a little bit handsy got my you know my hand around her neck and
Chef Mike: All right, let's go.
Chef Mike: Yeah.
dedhamfag: I got out of there, got in and you know, $23,000, no die packs, no tracers, pretty good. so point 7.8. Location wasn't the best.
dedhamfag: ah Like, subscribe, follow.
Chef Mike: you never you never want to uh you never want to see a dude cry that one was tough for me uh man crying it just just shouldn't happen and the security guard he he kept he should be there to protect people but he kept he cried he was on his knees he said i have a son i have a son don't kill me i have a son it was it was frankly pretty gay and he should be ashamed of himself so that one's uh 6.6
dedhamfag: yeah
dedhamfag: ah Yeah, so if you guys want more tips, just comment course in the comments underneath and I'll shoot you a DM. It's just all the responses of me in the DMs. Just like, check your DM! Exclamation point.
Chef Mike: Mm-hmm.
dedhamfag: Sunglasses guy emoji. Course, course, course, course, course. course course Then there's obviously going to be some of the nice tried-diddy comments in there.
Chef Mike: hey
dedhamfag: I'll rebuttal at those. make Stop doing this. This serious channel. Stop commenting. This won't be. I'm going to turn comments off.
dedhamfag: You got to admit this. the Tim Heidecker picture looks dead on like that guy. Right?
Chef Mike: Dude, it's crazy. Just the hair's a little bit too light, but otherwise, fucking spot on.
dedhamfag: yeah
Chef Mike: That would be, I'm like, what is what is there to do a comedy sketch on about that? Oh, that'd be good.
dedhamfag: Do you think i would I would get murdered if I put that in like the free Karen Reed Reddit?
Chef Mike: No, not anymore. I mean, the actual, oh, the free Karen Reed Reddit? Yeah, you'd be fine. There's a Karen Reed trial Reddit that's like more, they try to be more like, objective and they are fucking Nazis about posting and anything funny anything that's like a meme they just delete it right away gotten like six warnings from that subreddit for just being for like making a joke
dedhamfag: Oh, God.
dedhamfag: no
dedhamfag: Stop making jokes in here. Stop putting advertisements for Israel on this Reddit. We're talking about Karen Reed.
Chef Mike: I'm
Chef Mike: um
dedhamfag: Israel.
Chef Mike: ah one No one bombed Iran before John O'Keefe died. Kind of makes you think.
Chef Mike: Kind of makes you think.
dedhamfag: Instead of B-52, Bobby, she just center sent her over there with a toya Toyota Highlander.
Chef Mike: Yeah, there we go.
dedhamfag: or Alexis, ah Alexis for four 30 and just back in night everybody.
Chef Mike: Yeah. Backing into the ah Ayatollah.
dedhamfag: Oh my God.
Chef Mike: He'd never see it coming.
dedhamfag: Oh my God. It's a woman. Oh no.
dedhamfag: ah Oh, my God. That's so Not guilty on our counts.
dedhamfag: She was a little drunk before she came over to Iran, but six months probation.
dedhamfag: Oh, man. Let's get Karen Reid on the podcast.
Chef Mike: he Come on.
dedhamfag: Karen, we know you're getting probably like like eight figures to be on podcast offers. We have nothing to offer you. you know, maybe you'll make some, you know, could you make some jokes about Israel or some Jews and say they're like stinky or something?
dedhamfag: Come on. Big supporters. I'm
Chef Mike: she's from Canton. She's 100% down.
Chef Mike: You know that her, like the lawyers did a good job excluding, you know, like in discovery, you have to turn over everything.
dedhamfag: from
Chef Mike: And then, and then each side goes through all the evidence and you get to like, uh, be like, this isn't relevant. So we don't, you don't get to talk about this because it's irrelevant. Um, I'm sure they, they went through all her stuff, you know, and the I'm sure there was so many,
dedhamfag: She can't talk about beer from can.
Chef Mike: hard Rs that, that the defense team got excluded from, you know, for relevant, for being irrelevant.
dedhamfag: Oh, yeah.
dedhamfag: Oh, my God. You listen to dudes are us. What the hell? What the hell, Karen?
dedhamfag: We got to wipe this off the face of the earth.
dedhamfag: Let's get Alan Jackson's meta glasses from the trial footage.
Chef Mike: There we go.
Chef Mike: um oh i finally watched the ocean gate documentary
dedhamfag: Oh, how much of a fucking prick was that guy, right?
Chef Mike: dude he sucked um but i feel like that documentary i might of like don't want to say i changed up on him a little bit because he's obviously an asshole and i still think he's an asshole but and none of that surprised me you're like yeah of course he's a billionaire who like wanted to
dedhamfag: Oh, yeah.
Chef Mike: Who wanted to make like. so A submarine business. Like make. Be like the Elon Musk of the ocean.
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: Like that dude's. Definitely douche. ah
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: But. What I took away from that. but Documentary is like. is like Whatever is. you know Advice to our listeners. Whatever you can possibly do. To avoid dying.
Chef Mike: ah Don't die. Because if you die, apparently, all your friends and co-workers and family will, like, come out of the woodwork to talk shit about you.
dedhamfag: Oh, yeah.
dedhamfag: He's the worst guy of all time.
Chef Mike: Like, definitely bad, but all these people who were like, yeah, I, like, took the job, and he was like, I believed he was, like, brilliant and all this, but then, like,
Chef Mike: I don't know. He's like a bad person and he sucks. and And it's definitely his fault that those people are dead and not mine.
dedhamfag: Oh, my God.
Chef Mike: And there was like eight different people they interviewed like that that were like, yeah, I just like, I helped him build the submarine and I, and I found all the billionaires to put in the submarine and I screwed the billionaires into the submarine. But then like, then he was like, I'm going to drive the submarine. And I was like, nah, you can't do that. All right. I quit.
Chef Mike: Cause I'd morally, I couldn't work there anymore after I had already built the submarine and put the billionaires in the submarine and everyone was about to die. Then I quit. I'm like, How are you getting away with this?
Chef Mike: Because you quit. You quit like two days before they died. So prove that proves that it you weren't a part of this.
dedhamfag: Yeah, I
Chef Mike: Kind messed up.
dedhamfag: put my two-week notice in.
Chef Mike: yeah we Yeah, we were listening on the microphone and I heard a loud ah we heardd a lab pop.
dedhamfag: Oh, my God.
Chef Mike: and And that's when I knew that like I just couldn't be a part of Ocean Gate anymore. had ah So i I handed in my resignation to the board and I quit. And yeah, what happened after that, that' you know that's that's between sand that's between Stockton and God. I don't know.
dedhamfag: Yeah, I don't know. Stockton and JC, I don't know. It's the same.
Chef Mike: that's That's crazy. Life's crazy, man.
dedhamfag: Yeah, but yeah, no, yeah.
Chef Mike: you ah Is this your signature on the on the safety inspection manifest? ah before Well, I signed it, but really like everyone knew that Stockton was an asshole, and if I didn't sign it, he would have just forged my signature. So there wasn't any point in not signing it because he's just a bad guy, and he wouldn't he would we you would have done it anyway. So you can't really make it my fault because it's not.
dedhamfag: Yeah, this is a that's my signature about, like, you know, I don't know. It's just, like, I sent it. Like, here's my Gmail. I sent them in a sassy way the night before.
Chef Mike: yeah
dedhamfag: like, FYI, team. Like, I'm not sure if we should really do this. Yeah, that's my whole defense. I put my two weeks in shortly after that. There are some ah brutal clips, though, of Stockton Rush being... It's like his audio, too. It's not even just emails.
dedhamfag: you know It's like, ah Stockton Rush in 2020 while they're building. He's like, yeah, you know no one's going to die. This thing's not going to implode on us and kill everybody.
Chef Mike: Yes. Oh my God.
dedhamfag: Yeah.
Chef Mike: They had so, I mean, obviously they just had a lot of footage. I didn't realize like how much, how far back this like business venture went.
Chef Mike: And like, there was a lot of, you know, like media coverage and stuff prior to it that nobody cared about until after he died.
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: But yes, they definitely like found some choice clips.
dedhamfag: Oh my God. Such some brutal damning clips.
Chef Mike: Literally where he's like, I'll put my life on it. I'll put this is this. Come We're going to go. We're going go 5,000 feet down and we're going fine. Then we're going go 5,001 and it's going to implode like get real.
Chef Mike: We're not going to get it. We're going to get it graded because we don't need to.
Chef Mike: You're like, dude.
dedhamfag: Oh my god. yeah What do you think? We're going to go down. ah you know we're goingnna We're going to go. We're going to go down 4,000 meters. And then we're going to come up.
Chef Mike: Bro.
dedhamfag: And then we're going to do about three and a half times. And then you know what do you think? We're on the last one. We're going to only go down 1,000 meters and implode.
dedhamfag: I'll bet my life against that. I'll bet your life too against that.
Chef Mike: Oh, gosh.
dedhamfag: Come on.
Chef Mike: Actually, two takeaways. First takeaway, don't die. um Because apparently...
dedhamfag: Yes, number one.
Chef Mike: Apparently if you die, all your friends are just going to be like, like oh yeah, he was a fag. I hated him actually.
dedhamfag: yeah Yeah, you went to Princeton.
Chef Mike: ah
dedhamfag: Total fag.
Chef Mike: Yeah, I know there's earlier recordings of me saying that I thought he's a genius and I would go, I would walk to the ends of the earth for him and that ah he's a modern day Einstein, but actually like he sucked.
Chef Mike: And um here's an email where he said something pretty fucked up about ruining people's lives.
dedhamfag: Yeah, he's a bitch.
Chef Mike: So yeah, ah but definitely don't die because that's what's going to happen.
dedhamfag: yeah
Chef Mike: If you've ever wondered what happens after I die, your friends and family talk shit about you.
dedhamfag: They hate that everyone
Chef Mike: Uh, yeah, that's, that's my takeaway.
dedhamfag: Everyone comes out and says they fucking hate you and you're a bitch.
Chef Mike: Second, second, and the second, uh, lesson I learned. Don't ever go into anything that you have to be screwed into. Yeah.
dedhamfag: yeah Yeah, especially in the ocean.
Chef Mike: If it doesn't have a door, like the the the shitty all-female space thing that Amazon did where they went into space, as bad as that was, as cringe as that was, they had a door.
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: At least they had a door to get in and out of the spaceship. i ah What's his face? Bezos knew better than to screw people in.
dedhamfag: Yes. Yeah.
Chef Mike: that was I have to imagine that was an option. And it's probably cheaper than building a door. But he was like, you know what? If we're going to do this thing, we're going to make these people pay a billion dollars to go to space.
Chef Mike: they gotta we're gonna We'll give them a door.
dedhamfag: I'll put a fucking door in there.
Chef Mike: um and if the guy So that should just be a red flag. like There was it was a lot of red flags, clearly, that some people overlooked who got in that submarine. But your last red flag should have been like...
Chef Mike: wait, we're being screwed in like, Oh yeah.
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: It's like, it's fine. It's, this is like, it's like an, you know, uh, those Easter eggs, those plastic Easter eggs that you put candy in and hide. It's like that. It, it's like two halves and then we just screw them together and then it, and then it's good.
Chef Mike: You're like, Oh, okay.
dedhamfag: Oh, my God.
Chef Mike: Oh, I'm getting into a big old plastic Easter egg. Nice.
dedhamfag: Don't screw... Yeah, and that's... You're just depending on... There's, like, the guys on the floating thing that's screwing you and ah with, like, the Ryobi fucking...
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: the drill.
Chef Mike: And then there's like Oh man, i don't even. And then there's like the clip of stock and like, yeah, the key is you gotta, you gotta screw them in. You gotta screw in real tight, but, but not too tight.
Chef Mike: And you're like, what the fuck does that mean?
dedhamfag: but yeah
Chef Mike: There's a, there's a, there's a point at which you're too, it's too secure. And that's also dangerous.
dedhamfag: nothing I mean, come on, come on. Nothing's going to happen to us We're perfectly screwed in here. I love on the first one where that the the whistleblower guy is like ah the Irish guy or whatever he is calling.
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: He's like, and he's all pissed. He's like, I, you know, I didn't get to go down. He told me I'm not going to be able to pilot the first one. And then we go down there. I finally am i able to. And then he's stuck.
dedhamfag: He sticks us right into the ah bow.
Chef Mike: Yeah.
dedhamfag: Like, oh, my God. tell him, Stockton, give me give me the PS2 controller. I got to get us out.
dedhamfag: What an idiot. And you're with people too. He's with like the, the guy that like runs the Atlantic or whatever the fuck it is.
Chef Mike: Oh my God.
Chef Mike: Yes. They're like people, like people who paid to be there. And he's like, he's we're going to die.
dedhamfag: Yeah. We're going to fucking die. There's no way of like everybody at thinks oh there's no there's not like a crane that could just pick you up out of the fucking thing. You just have to keep like like when you're flipped on your side and grant the father, you're going to keep like rocking the joystick back and forth to hopefully get you out of that spot.
dedhamfag: It's impossible. Fucking idiots, dude. I love ah on the like ah employee tree, too, throughout the documentary.
dedhamfag: It obviously starts with like you know Stockton. There's like the director of engineering, ah the director of like ah accounting or whatever, and another director.
dedhamfag: And the whole time throughout the documentaries, people are quitting and putting in their weeks and they're disappearing off the employee tree and it shows it.
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: And the whole time there's one guy that's stuck there the whole time.
Chef Mike: yes
dedhamfag: david grier David Griffin or David Griffith or something. Who's like the director of operations. And he just stayed put in his position the entire time.
dedhamfag: And I don't think he ever talked or interviewed or anything. It was crazy.
dedhamfag: Like, yeah, david David's ah currently still with Ocean Gate. He's got a good pension going. and I know he blew six people up, but he's still with the team to this day.
Chef Mike: Yeah.
dedhamfag: He's still director of Opping.
Chef Mike: The board yeah boards actually made him the COO.
dedhamfag: Yeah.
dedhamfag: That's on his LinkedIn. It's like, David was now promoted to COO of Ocean Gate.
Chef Mike: I was thinking about that. Uh, with regard with the, with the girl who like got hired like out of college or like during college as like an intern.
dedhamfag: Oh, God, yeah.
Chef Mike: And then eventually like, and they are like following her story. and then eventually they're like, yeah. So after that guy quit, they wanted to make me the ah president of operations and ah into a submarine pilot.
dedhamfag: Yeah.
Chef Mike: So, you know, they told me they weren't going to pay me anymore for it, but like, you know, it was during COVID. So like, I, what am I going to do?
dedhamfag: Oh, my God, yeah.
Chef Mike: Like not have a job. And I was like, ah like her, her story, because she, I don't know how long it went on, but like she, her, all of her experience after college for several years is ocean gate.
Chef Mike: And you have to be like, yeah, so yeah, my, you know, you it was weird.
dedhamfag: Oh, God. Yeah.
dedhamfag: yeah You think she writes it off like every like younger person was, you know, it was COVID. It's crazy.
Chef Mike: Yeah, it's not like, like I've got enough, you know, we've both got enough like work experience and like age where you could bury some shit. Or if I like didn't want to talk about how I was like worked in retail or whatever, I could be like, oh yeah, i did some other stuff.
Chef Mike: You got like one thing you you'd be like, what, what have you doing for the last six years since you graduated? Oh yeah. um You know, just this and that.
Chef Mike: A little bit of this. little bit I spent some time in Aruba. That was cool. oh what were you doing in Aruba? It doesn't matter.
dedhamfag: yeah Yeah, nothing.
Chef Mike: doesn' it doesn't matter.
dedhamfag: it just They're like, oh, you work for, you know, Ocean Gay, right?
Chef Mike: Oh, It's confusing. doesn't matter
dedhamfag: Well, i you know, it was yeah it was COVID time. So she talks about it like everybody in COVID where it's like, you know, I was i drank you know i drank like every other night.
Chef Mike: oh yeah and ski
dedhamfag: I drank like six beers every other night, but it was COVID. It was fun.
Chef Mike: It's COVID. So, yeah, i realize our oh you i see I realize this happens all the time, actually, and I and i realize why you're confused. um'm I didn't work for Ocean Gate, the ah submarine company. i actually worked for a different Ocean Gate that um we build ah fences underwater to keep whales ah and dolphins in place. So, yeah, I can see why you're confused. But, yeah, not that Ocean Gate.
dedhamfag: I can see where those two overlap. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. But it was COVID.
Chef Mike: ah it's
dedhamfag: It was crazy.
Chef Mike: But it says you were a submarine pilot. ah yeah Oh, that must that must be a typo.
dedhamfag: She's talking about like, oh, yeah, it was so, a you know, toxic workplace and whatever else. and But it was COVID. I had to get a job. I'm like, you're like just out college and they're giving money away if you don't work in COVID.
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: You did not need to do this. you just You want the Netflix hype right now.
Chef Mike: Yes. And it's like, and it's not like, uh, you know, like, Oh, I had to keep the, you know, it's my, this was my dad's restaurant and his dad's restaurant before him.
dedhamfag: ah Yeah, exactly.
Chef Mike: And like, we were struggling, but like, I wanted to keep the family business alive and like people were depending on me. So I had to keep working. It's not that it's like, well, if I quit, who's gonna, who's going to implode the billionaires.
dedhamfag: Who's going to implode the the two billionaires in Indian Sun? Who is going to implode them? It's like, no one is asking for this. You guys have to like convince people to do it.
dedhamfag: Who's going to go down and see the fucking oldest boat in the bottom of the sea for like through through like a 14 inch porthole too?
Chef Mike: Oh God.
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: What's the difference of you going down there and you like watching a camera go all the way down there and that's it? What's the difference of that?
Chef Mike: Rich people nonsense.
dedhamfag: oh, I want to experience it in a fucking... And, like, the whole documentary, I'm, like, seeing the Ocean Gate, the whatever, the Titan, and even the yeah first one, whatever the fuck, of the... I don't know, whatever, the Octopus, whatever or whatever the fuck it's called.
dedhamfag: Both of them from the outside look pretty shitty. Like you see wires and stuff. And I know it's probably maybe.
Chef Mike: Yeah.
dedhamfag: But like I'm like the other ones, the other submersibles look a lot better than these. You see like wires on the outside and stuff. And like you said, you have to like get drilled into it. Doesn't make any sense.
dedhamfag: It's like this doesn't look too good. I don't think I'm going to do this. Needed to look a lot cleaner.
dedhamfag: And what was the whole reason they were like, we're going to use carbon fiber instead of titanium or steel. Was that just cost?
Chef Mike: Yeah, that...
dedhamfag: Or was he just trying to think he knew what knew what he was doing?
Chef Mike: yeah I think it was it was for sure cost. Because it's not like... It's not like it's an issue if a submarine is heavy.
dedhamfag: Yes. Seems like it would be good.
Chef Mike: I might even say...
dedhamfag: Yeah.
Chef Mike: ah yeah exactly. ah might even say helps.
dedhamfag: yeah
Chef Mike: um But I assume that engineering like precision engineering... also how I assume the preciion precision engineering like a submarine hull is probably... They made it sound really difficult.
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: But as I look at this thing... That is... i don't know. Vaguely mango shaped?
dedhamfag: yeah Yes. Yes.
Chef Mike: How could it be that hard? I think you could... Like send... Be like, hey, China, can you make a big old titanium cylinder? They'd be like, yeah.
Chef Mike: They'd be like, hi. Hi.
dedhamfag: right
Chef Mike: um
dedhamfag: hey
Chef Mike: But I digress. don't I don't look at that thing and see like, oh yeah, this is a $6 million dollar craft. It's like, ah it just has to sink.
dedhamfag: Yeah.
Chef Mike: This has to sink and not implode.
dedhamfag: So bad, dude. So bad. There you go. What's the crackling noise? It's just, you know, seasoning.
Chef Mike: Seasoning.
dedhamfag: Yeah, crazy.
Chef Mike: Good God.
dedhamfag: Crazy. Is that anywhere on anything carbon fiber that that's what that says? That's crazy work.
dedhamfag: It's crazy.
dedhamfag: What else? ah What else? ah oh I was going to say it's like the video of them. They're like in the early stages of building the Titan. It's like this is a big day. We're getting the whole whole up whatever put together.
dedhamfag: And any time it's like they're putting the top of the hole on or whatever the portal. I don't know. Whatever the sphere shape on the front of the Titan. And they're putting it all with like some bonding glue.
dedhamfag: Like anything that's like that, I was like, you know what? I'm out. If there's an O-ring or bonding glue. No, just why not just weld it into there? It doesn't make any sense. Anytime there's glue, what the fuck are we doing?
Chef Mike: Yeah, the yeah but
dedhamfag: We only have one shot because we have a ton of glue on it.
Chef Mike: the ways they were cutting corners or whatever or trying to be
dedhamfag: I think it's engineers being stupid. Engineers being like, well, you know, technically it'll work.
Chef Mike: Yeah, I guess what I'm like is like it didn't feel like any of it was super necessary.
dedhamfag: Okay.
Chef Mike: Like in the sense of his his idea was his his. I want to be a rich guy and like. You know, like a Elon Musk type of rich guy idea was like, oh, commercial commercialize ocean exploration.
dedhamfag: Well, he's not Dark Maga either.
Chef Mike: All right.
dedhamfag: Yep.
Chef Mike: Not Dark Maga, but I think that he thought that that was his ticket. If he could.
dedhamfag: yes
Chef Mike: could If he could be like, I'm not just some fucking weirdo. i actually like have ah submarine. I don't fucking know.
Chef Mike: He imagined he could have like a multi-billion dollar submarine business. But like, okay.
dedhamfag: yep
Chef Mike: i can I can get past that. I can at least get past that and be like, you know what? If you crack the code... Disney would buy some of your submarines or like an attraction and, and Saudi Arabia would for sure.
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: And like the UAE would like, there would be at least a is yes.
dedhamfag: Is Israel. israel
Chef Mike: can get past it. It's at least a million dollars. It's at least be a bit, a single B billion dollar business. Uh,
Chef Mike: ah So then all you just need is submarines that don't implode. And we already know how to make those. Like. If you can charge what did he charges a billionaire to be on there like.
dedhamfag: 100K a ticket.
Chef Mike: Hundred thousand dollars. So if you can run a submarine that doesn't implode. Fucking call it. What? Ten times a year and you can put.
Chef Mike: 3 billion, you can put 3 billionaires, you charge 100K, like, all right, you've paid for your submarine already in a year. And you built it the way that we already know how to build, like the way that James Cameron's submarine that went to the bottom of the Mariana's trench didn't implode.
Chef Mike: But he was like, nah, we gotta do it. and Carbon fiber and glue.
Chef Mike: Just doesn't seem necessary.
dedhamfag: Yep.
Chef Mike: Do that, Stockton.
dedhamfag: Yeah, you fucking dead bitch.
Chef Mike: Dead idiot bitch.
dedhamfag: Couldn't wear one kippah down there to fucking protect you.
Chef Mike: Honestly, it seems related.
dedhamfag: don't think Stockton, I don't think we're going to be able to make it down there. You're fucking fired.
Chef Mike: After that, everything changed.
dedhamfag: fucking Scottish bitch
Chef Mike: You know, he was that guy was hired exclusively because also he had like a dope accent.
dedhamfag: oh yeah exactly
Chef Mike: do like like if you're trying to get like ah like for the same reason that after that guy they were like they were picking women and they were like oh yeah you we want you to be like the young female pilot like that's gonna be the face of the company before they decided that they were like having this like gruff scottish dude seems very like adventuring that was their strategy
dedhamfag: I got to look this up. He's Colin. Who's the
dedhamfag: the. think there was a Scottish guy on whose line is it anyways. That guy reminded me of him. So whatever.
Chef Mike: Scottish. got to work on my Scottish accent.
dedhamfag: Comedian Scottish guy comedian. I'm looking up and getting deep right now into the research.
Chef Mike: Okay.
Chef Mike: Scottish.
dedhamfag: Scottish guy, comedian. oh Man, I'm off. Yes, here it is. craig Craig Ferguson.
Chef Mike: Oh, yeah. Craig Ferguson.
dedhamfag: yeah Craig Ferguson was a chief engineer of Ocean Gate.
Chef Mike: You had a late night show, didn't you? No, that was a different guy.
dedhamfag: Yeah, think so.
Chef Mike: No, it was him.
dedhamfag: Yeah, right?
Chef Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
dedhamfag: Yeah, he helped Stockton Rush blow those people up. Blame him.
Chef Mike: ah ah What happens to that guy's lawsuit now?
dedhamfag: Well, he just wasted a bunch of money fighting a dead guy, right?
Chef Mike: Yeah, what happens when you when that happens? Does is does a judge...
dedhamfag: What happens if someone files a lawsuit against you and you're just like, nah?
Chef Mike: Oh, then I think they just rule against you no matter what.
dedhamfag: No way. You have to fight it?
Chef Mike: Yes.
dedhamfag: No way.
Chef Mike: Yeah, if you get sued for something that's bullshit, but you don't show up, you just like don't show up to your hearing and you're just like, yeah, I don't. You wave all of your fucking shit and the judge can just be like, well, since your opponent, since the defendant isn't here, ah have no choice but to rule in favor of the plaintiff.
dedhamfag: Damn, should I just start suing every company in the United States until I win one?
Chef Mike: ah um You could try. ah don't think it's free.
dedhamfag: Just try to slide it under the radar?
Chef Mike: I think I don't think it's free to do.
dedhamfag: ah do you How do you catch EPT?
Chef Mike: No, but even like I think there's filing fees like just to just to file the lawsuit.
dedhamfag: Show up to court.
Chef Mike: They're like, yeah, just they do it to keep the riffraff out. They're like, yeah, it's ninety dollars to hand us this piece of paper.
dedhamfag: Well, I would have chat GPT. would say it's chat GPT to charge it to my AI bot.
Chef Mike: Yeah, that would work, I guess.
dedhamfag: Say, oh, that's not my fault. Charge it to AI bot.
Chef Mike: Oh, that's AI.
dedhamfag: Yeah, okay.
Chef Mike: Yeah, no, you...
dedhamfag: yeah i I got file. have four thousand eight hundred documents today to file though
dedhamfag: Just lawsuits on all of them just says like, cause I'm gay. All of them. Yeah. Yes. um yeah
Chef Mike: Honestly, like, some of them might settle if you weren't asking for that much.
dedhamfag: yeah
Chef Mike: because Because for exactly the reason that it does cost money, If you weren't asking for that much, if you were like, like, uh, I flew on a Boeing seven 57 and now I'm gay and you, so you sued Boeing and you were like, I don't, I just want $2,000.
dedhamfag: yes
dedhamfag: $16,000. Hey, could win that $16,000.
Chef Mike: They might. Yeah. 16 even they might just be like, you know what?
dedhamfag: Give
Chef Mike: We don't need, we don't need this heat. we want to settle this quietly. you get the money, you'd have to sign an NDA. None of the court transcripts are ever made public. instead ah and And instead of people getting some ideas that maybe Boeing, maybe flying on Boeing makes you gay.
dedhamfag: hey i could win that sixteen thousand dollars gi me it now.
Chef Mike: Yeah.
dedhamfag: After fees, probably $12,000. After I pay my my AI lawyer.
Chef Mike: yeah I think it would work. I think, I think if you cast a wide net and you didn't ask for too much, uh, you'd get some, you know, and you targeted just big corporations. You'd get some settles.
Chef Mike: At least you just get some people who are like, don't want to fucking deal with this guy. That
dedhamfag: Yeah. This guy's fucking gay and crazy.
Chef Mike: was fucking crazy.
dedhamfag: This guy's gay and crazy.
Chef Mike: was fucking gay and crazy.
dedhamfag: We got that one.
Chef Mike: And he figured out that our planes make you gay.
dedhamfag: Yeah. This guy cracked the fucking code, huh? How much does he want?
Chef Mike: Before there was...
dedhamfag: $4,000? True, true, true. I'm following
Chef Mike: I mean, just prior to there being airplanes, so like, I don't know when that was, 1950 or something, or 1850. You never hear about like trans people, right?
Chef Mike: There's no like... ah Like in Rome...
dedhamfag: you. following yeah
Chef Mike: They wrote about a bunch of books back then and there was never like, oh yeah, like this dude just wanted to be a lady. They don't, that wasn't a thing. And then ah somewhere around like 1850 or whenever they made planes and i don't know, things been getting a lot gayer ever since.
dedhamfag: True, true, true.
Chef Mike: So maybe the planes do make you gay.
dedhamfag: Great points.
dedhamfag: Okay. Hell yeah, that makes sense.
Chef Mike: that would be my That would be my opening argument, I think, in the in the trial.
dedhamfag: They have nothing else to say. Okay.
Chef Mike: How they going to prove that that's not true? You'd be like, listen, 200 years ago, there was like no trans people. I don't know, maybe some gay people, but they were pretty quiet about it.
dedhamfag: Exhibit A.
Chef Mike: Now?
dedhamfag: It's just bunch straight guys.
Chef Mike: Now there's like... Yeah, now now there's like 200 planes flying in the air every single day. And ah I had to update my iPhone just for a rainbow flag wallpaper.
Chef Mike: They won't stop telling me to do it.
dedhamfag: Yes.
Chef Mike: It's gotten dicey out there.
dedhamfag: Exhibit A, you just point to a helicopter, a bunch of straight guys in it. Sir, explain that.
dedhamfag: Helicopter versus planes, explain that, sir.
dedhamfag: a great point, though. That's why yeah the Jewish people that are really serious put bags over their heads on planes.
dedhamfag: You drop out.
Chef Mike: No, I'm still here.
dedhamfag: We're still going. ah
Chef Mike: Sorry. I was trying to remember the name of a sandwich place.
dedhamfag: yeah sir Subway. wait Subway.
Chef Mike: ah You ever been to an Earl of Sandwich?
dedhamfag: No. What the fuck?
Chef Mike: like i don't I don't even know if it's West Coast or if it's just in casinos.
dedhamfag: Probably. Probably.
Chef Mike: But my buddy's in Vegas right now, and he sent me his what he's eating, and he's eating a sub from Port of Subs. And I was like, and then I wanted to be like, what was Earl of Sandwich too busy? Basically just making fun of like, why are you eating casino food court food?
dedhamfag: nothing wrong with that, dude.
Chef Mike: ah But they don't have a...
dedhamfag: Nothing wrong with eating at the Lucky Penny in Palms.
Chef Mike: Oh, the Lucky Penny was a different.
dedhamfag: Whatever it is. ah that what it's called?
Chef Mike: um That was. Well, so they had an ace, which was the all you can eat buffet. But Lucky Penny was.
dedhamfag: No, no. Just like the cafe or whatever.
Chef Mike: What was Lucky Penny?
dedhamfag: I don't know.
Chef Mike: Yes, that's it.
dedhamfag: It was right when he walked in.
Chef Mike: I think it was called that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
dedhamfag: I think I ate every meal there.
Chef Mike: pretty good.
dedhamfag: and Well, that's a great podcast, guys. We're going to hop off while we're where we're however rolling out of here.
Chef Mike: We did it.
dedhamfag: Okay.
Chef Mike: Yep. i mean Yeah. Before Israel drops the bombs.
dedhamfag: Yes, everybody share your friends and family. Like, add reviews to the fucking podcast.
Chef Mike: Yeah. we're you could so ah You can.
dedhamfag: So easy to do.
Chef Mike: you can. Yeah. And if you've already rated or reviewed us, you now ah for Spotify listeners, you can add reviews and comments to every episode.
dedhamfag: Do that.
Chef Mike: Do that.
dedhamfag: Fucking do that.
Chef Mike: doesn't have to. I don't even think um't even think you have to say nice things.
dedhamfag: Come on.
Chef Mike: I think it's probably like engagement is engagement. So you can also tell us you hate us. You can absolutely stalk and rush us. 83.
dedhamfag: 80, 83 episodes.
Chef Mike: Peace out.
dedhamfag: All right. That's it. Goodbye. Goodbye.
Chef Mike: he so
