Transcript
Speaker: Welcome to Dudes R Us.
Speaker: now let's start the show what up
Speaker: yes we're here it's going down what's up primals what's up primals
Speaker: Who says that? You got to, Liver King. Oh, dude. You got to use the, uh, that, that other, uh, Grantifato intro now from now on.
Speaker: Yeah, I think I or did YouTube page. I got, I'm getting, uh, all of our shit. I'm like re-uploading one right now. Oh, did you fix? Cause I can, uh,
Speaker: I can change the intro pretty easily. No, it's all good. It just like automatically erases it. So if anybody listening goes on YouTube and it's a weird empty spaces in the podcast, it's YouTube erasing it.
Speaker: Removes the copyrighted parts, but keeps the rest of the, Oh, that's very weird. Yeah. youtube be Like can like the keeps just like the, or removes just the music. Even like ah when I played like Modest Yahoo off my phone, it like picked that up and copyrighted it.
Speaker: Bro.
Speaker: That's too much. How is that? Let us live. I want to fucking copy. Let's just put Theo Vaughn.
Speaker: Let's just play our phones of Theo Vaughn for an hour and fucking upload it. Yeah, that's crazy, dude. Also, that feels, I guess people like, I don't fucking know.
Speaker: I guess other, you know, like people who have deals with YouTube, they maybe they get special treatment. um like, I definitely watch streamers who put copyrighted material up for at least some amount of time.
Speaker: try to keep Trying to keep the the little the little man down. Yeah, seriously. It's a fucking... It's like everything else. The system's stacked against you.
Speaker: All you want to do is... Fucking live. I mean, there's no... You put clips over all the fucking music we use. There's no... Like, that's fair use. That's fair use. You're not playing a song, three-minute-long song, except for when all of our episodes ended with the Venga Boys. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker: But the intros always had other shit on top of them. That's fair use use. That's a derivative work. I'll stand by that. I'm fucking remixing it. Remix.
Speaker: Legitimately remixing it. Legitimately. ah You know, fuck that. Fuck you guys. What happened with the Liver King? He tried to kill Joe Rogan or something?
Speaker: Yeah. I was going to say that. I've been... gonna see that yeah it's i've been
Speaker: Unfortunately, I've been getting onto to his page. I don't want to. It makes me angry, but he's like full. Definitely.
Speaker: You know, I don't know if it's acting or what, but he's in a full manic state. Yes. Last week he flew to Austin. Yeah.
Speaker: and was in like a four seasons with like his entire family and two Dobermans. That's terrible. He has kids. Yeah. He has liver boys, two liver boys.
Speaker: Oh God. They have those weird, uh,
Speaker: That stupid haircut where it's like braided into like a man bun with the undercut shave. Yeah, I know exactly who you're talking about. You can only get that if you're like Puerto Rican.
Speaker: Total faggots or lesbian. True. to to Two Puerto Rican lesbians is like the only way that flies.
Speaker: But yeah, he went to Austin and he's like held up in like ah four season suite with his family and he's like calling in random like workers into the from the four seasons to like come in his room and the whole time he's like I'm gonna fight you Joe Rogan this one's this is for you Joe Rogan where are you I'll find a video it's pretty uh pretty terrifying just not ah him being terrifying but just seeing someone completely lose their fucking mind
Speaker: Yeah, I definitely think there's an element with like everyone who becomes internet famous where they were a person and then they started and then their audience made them become a person who's kind of acting.
Speaker: so Yes. Comment on what you were saying before. But I think based on what little I saw of this but did catch some of it, ah this seems like he's genuinely fucking lost his mind.
Speaker: And... hard to not relate that to like being a dude who made himself famous by like eating raw liver and shit. This guy sucks Always. they like Maybe there's fucking something wrong with your brain now.
Speaker: and did all of it. You could hate me. Say these things, but you're not allowed to do that further than me. And when you do, and touches my family.
Speaker: Look at me, I didn't. Me leveraged. Trying to find... Oh, did Joe Rogan talk about him on his podcast? No, no, no. Oh, that'd be great. Imagine... Period.
Speaker: C-O-M.
Speaker: He... I don't think he would ever... Ever... I don't think Joe Rogan would ever talk about... Just pulling up. Just pulling up to... I was just thinking how funny that would be if...
Speaker: like jayshock9 heard our podcast and then tried to kill us want introduce you to jim rogan
Speaker: i want to introduce you to jim rogan jim rogan jim rogan jim rogan gave this to me he gave this to me bottom my feet He has like a Joe Rogan, like a JRE merch he's carrying.
Speaker: this is
Speaker: kind i can so of the coffee both ways really cut session should have amazing coffee last thing giving up was dying over exaggerating but a ct scan had something that was dire stras then greenfield helped me He gave me this recipe, kind of changed my life. Thank you Ben Greenfield.
Speaker: That's what I'm doing right now. select the fourth one that I'm doing and that's how I'm doing it. And I can share everything because I'm actually free actually free i'm proud and oh that's a good feeling not embarrassed that i do copy it time hurry there goes scoon And as I keep doing it, oh, the police are coming, or something's happening, somebody's overreacting.
Speaker: In this video, he's in the shower doing a coffee enema. That... Oh, God. And he's drinking out of it at the same time. No, he's not.
Speaker: I mean, I guess it's not. It hasn't gone in his ass yet. Jesus Christ. ah not that not that that dude wouldn't if with the littlest amount of like scientific convincing if you were like oh the way to stay young forever and like fix all your problems is is you have to drink the coffee after the enema oh yeah that is that's where the actual health benefits come from like
Speaker: Level one, coffee enema. Level two, drinking the after enema coffee. it be It fixes your iron. ah all Before that, you have bad iron. After that, you have good iron. You'd be like, oh, fuck.
Speaker: i I need good iron. ah Yeah, I think it's fucking crazy to to fly with that, too, on you. You got to pack that.
Speaker: Um, yeah, everybody, uh, or not everybody, there's been some crazy comments and all those one that made the most sense that I saw that was like a low key comment was like, yeah, I think like a month ago or so he started, like, he figured out like, uh, mushrooms and did a bunch of mushrooms. And now he's like in this manic episode. and i was like, okay, yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker: So, that dude definitely as some people do with a psychedelic experience, uh, triggered something in his brain.
Speaker: And now he is totally off the deep end. um Which I've seen it happen to many, many friends, and he's definitely in that zone.
Speaker: I mean, that same thing happened to Joe Rogan, frankly. Yeah, that's pretty... on Now, I guess it's crazy to say and Joe Rogan's like way, way below him.
Speaker: He started... Joe Rogan started out as like I don't know, fairly normal dude, and he hosted a show where you eat bugs for money. Yes. And then he did DMT and got it tattooed on him, and then he's... Now he's...
Speaker: fucking crazy. um So, Liver King and Liver Queen, um they seem pretty held captive, but he got a restraining order and got arrested at the Four Seasons in Austin from Joe Rogan, or Joe Rogan's team, probably.
Speaker: saw these old throws, and I just of, you know, kind of a little bit embarrassed. Picking the fight with, y'all know his name is?
Speaker: It's the big bully. Yeah, the big bully. And you know why? it's just not right. Good and true is right. It all stems, too, from that guy.
Speaker: What's his name on YouTube? ah some jim some Some weightlifting guy that exposed Liver King last year of taking gear. And then Joe Rogan. Oh, I think I knew that. Yeah, Joe Rogan.
Speaker: What's it? More plates, less dates, or plates and dates. so I don't know. Bro, that's kind of the other thing. Because that he's not the only one that that's happened to where it's like, oh, these people who are like, all you have to do is eat like fucking blue algae spirulina powder and you'll get fit.
Speaker: You just eat that all the time. And you find out they're just fucking taking steroids and shit. oh yeah Just to advertise the steroids. say you take some gear, you know, nothing wrong with that. be like, oh, you want to get jacked like this?
Speaker: You have to inject yourself with testosterone. I am on TRT.
Speaker: Let's see what this is. Let's see. Let's be honest about it. You think we get a good accent out of this clip? It's a random clip on my For You page. Hold on. 2.2 or something miles per hour.
Speaker: he tried to dress identically to John, but didn't anything else mimic what the Commonwealth is accusing me of. So did you go in reverse 24 miles an hour, 53 feet? The data is what the data is, and it's going to come out cleanly, more cleanly and in our case in chief.
Speaker: I think it's important to demonstrate what is the Commonwealth accusing me of? The speed, the positioning. Recreate that for us. Back back up into the crash test dummy at 20%.
Speaker: Alright. Decent accent on that. But yeah, then Joe Rogan talked about more plates. Let fucking get his fucking real fucking name on here ah
Speaker: here.
Speaker: More plates.
Speaker: More dates. Is that it? more Maybe I had it right the first time. That sounds like it could be real. Yeah, maybe. More plates, more dates. Yes, that's that's the guy. um He exposed him. Joe Rogan went on and ah he was on Joe Rogan and you know their friends or whatever and they exposed him and now seems like he had a manic episode from all probably all the gear he's taking mixed with psychedelics and then now he's here.
Speaker: Yeah, that's an insane combo. And talking that Joe Rogan's a big bully, which is hilarious. ah So, yeah, definitely ruined his life, probably crashed his...
Speaker: His ah little pyramid scheme that Liver King had for a while. And obviously, no he's getting all these likes and stuff on these videos now because he's losing his mind. But yeah, that's really it so far.
Speaker: And that's a, that's a, I think he got like his eye like poked out or something last year. So he has two different eyes too in his head. Like he has a glass eye or they gave someone else's eye.
Speaker: It looks like and ah maybe a glass eye, but yeah, it looks like, it looks like when a dog has a new eye, you know what I mean? Yeah.
Speaker: Clearly, like, it's like... Weird eye. Definitely looks glass. Fucked up eye. Yeah, so all of it just is pretty pretty sketchy. Yeah, that's a wild combo to just be rolling with, like...
Speaker: Bunch of fucking hallucinogens. Bunch of fucking steroids. Yeah, he takes something called a Blue Venom in one of his videos. It's like a dropper. Yeah, whatever.
Speaker: shit Shit like that it's like that's like, you know, you get from like Alibaba and like it's not meant not meant for human consumption.
Speaker: Blue scorpion venom, pain and inflammation relief. Oh, good. Like, yeah, this blocks the protein in your body that inhibits muscle growth.
Speaker: Just take it every day and then you just get jacked. And then just mix all that up with with like coffee enemas and raw liver and weird shit like that.
Speaker: Do you think it's actually scorpion venom that kind of snow you just see Who knows? The thing with that stuff is like... Well, not even with that stuff.
Speaker: With fucking everything is like... Maybe there's a, maybe there's a factory somewhere where they're like, there's like workers harvesting venom from scorpions.
Speaker: Maybe that seems crazy. It seems like a crazy job to have where you're like, yeah, i just grabbed a scorpion by his tail. And then I like poke its tail into like a cup until I have enough venom to fill this jar.
Speaker: Uh, maybe that's a thing. Or maybe they just make some fucked up, I have to look up, because now I feel like this could Non-habit-forming homeopathic drug designed to safely and effectively treat information. Oh, it's homeopathy.
Speaker: Oh, yeah what is What the fuck is that? Dude, homeopathy is genuinely retarded.
Speaker: Homeopathy, among the things that are like alternative medicine, like you can have... i I don't actually care what your opinions are. what any like if you want to get acupuncture, get acupuncture.
Speaker: um don't know if it does anything, but if being in a room with music playing and ah an Asian dude sticks needles in you makes you feel relaxed, probably money well spent. Homeopathy is retarded.
Speaker: So how it works. Brendan Schaub even fucking said it was stupid. So go on. Yeah, he knows.
Speaker: uh how it works for those of you who don't know is ah you take something so the principle of homeopathy is like cures like so if you want to cure ah like if you're crying for some reason the cure for that would be onion because onion makes you cry but the way but obviously if you put fucking onion juice in your eye you're just gonna cry it's not gonna cure anything So the way that you do it in homeopathy is you dilute it.
Speaker: And the more diluted it is, the stronger it is. So they will take like one drop. So suppose you were making a homeopathic cure for crying. You get your onion juice.
Speaker: You put one drop of onion juice in like a swimming pools worth of water
Speaker: and then you And then you take a little vial out of that pool. So so like statistically, there is not even a single molecule of onion in that bottle of water. Okay.
Speaker: There is none. ah But they believe that the onion gave like a energy imprint to the water that makes it medicinal. God.
Speaker: And people pay. Crazy. hundreds, thousands of dollars for this stuff. And it's, and then, so obviously the onion example is just, is a fake example. They use things like, okay, you want to cure it. Well, like ah being bitten by a snake causes, right? You swell, you get inflamed, you, all these bad stuff happens, snake bites, spider bites, all that. So if you want to cure inflammation, you give spider venom or whatever, tarantula venom, but you dilute that a million times, a billion times more than that, actually.
Speaker: then you, you know, then it cures that. It's the most, it's the stupidest fucking thing that is, it's crazy that it's legal because it's so obviously a ripoff. Yes.
Speaker: Well, it's none of it. It's all, it's all those things where it's like, uh, it doesn't say FDA registered. it says like made in the FDA registered facility. Yes.
Speaker: Yes. Yes. So it's like, yo if you, ah but so I get, it's like, if it's basically like, if you have a bee sting, that causes inflammation.
Speaker: So take the bee, take whatever that is every day. Literally. Yes. That's crazy. That sounds like hell. But, but diluted so much that there's no actual bee venom left in the samples. So it's just water.
Speaker: it's water that like one at one point yeah shared space with bee venom, but no longer has any. So there's nothing in, there's nothing in the water that does anything. It's just water.
Speaker: And they sell it to people for hundreds of dollars, sometimes thousands of dollars. If you were like, oh this is rare. This some fucking rare ass bee.
Speaker: uh so this has got to be a thousand dollars a vial and people pay that because they believe it'll make them better it is the height of fucking dumb shit how uh how long do you think it would take as uh how long do you think our if we we were on joe rogan how long do you think that would be of an episode with him Like 22 minutes.
Speaker: so i don't eat I don't know if it would make it on air.
Speaker: A 14-minute episode? Yes. Probably a minute 10 would be... be
Speaker: I would actually love to talk to him because is... he's he is most of the time, very convincible in a fun way where, like, he will just kind of agree with whatever his most recent... His opinion is kind of whatever his most recent guest... Yes....talked to him about.
Speaker: ah So I think it would be really fun to talk to him and just kind of infect him with bad ideas. Mm-hmm. Because he doesn't really... I don't think he really digs into things on his own.
Speaker: Like you can see it happen where it's like, if you do watch ah his show all the time where like, he'll have somebody on and they'll say something and he'll be like, and he hasn't heard of this before. And i'll be like, Oh, okay. Whoa. Yeah. didn't, I never knew that.
Speaker: And then a month later, two months later, he'll be talking to somebody else and he'll repeat that. Whatever that person told him. course. Yeah. Yeah. I think that would, I think that would be awesome. I would love to do that and just see what I could get him to repeat down the road without having critically thought about it at at all.
Speaker: I think me minute 12 would be like showing him from across the table, like all three of us on the other side of me. like shit Even though he could pull it up, it's like me showing the the phone of a a stupid Instagram reel and be like, check that out.
Speaker: And then trying to riff and it would just go nowhere. You see that? No, it's... dids no he's No, he's like 19 and he's in school still.
Speaker: the Guys, guys, guys, I mentioned this earlier. This doesn't really work. This doesn't really work for the show. Just showing your phone to me. like The viewers got to kind of know what's going on. We have better tech than you guys don't have to play the video into the microphone off your phone.
Speaker: No, he's... it's No, yeah. No, Darius is... He's 19, but... Oh, you haven't heard of him? Yeah, dude. He's still... He's in the 15th grade. he's in summer so He's in summer school, 15th grade. Yeah.
Speaker: No, we're not making fun of him. He's the man. He's the best. This is him at prom in a red Kangol hat. LAUGHTER This is him walking through a mall and someone that he he sees and he crushes them into a hug.
Speaker: Yes. He has a death grip on people that it's like is on his page where it's like, oh, Darius is has fans. It's literally him like death holding a poor little girl or something.
Speaker: ah There's a song. go Oh, you don't. i I see what why you didn't think that was funny, but wait, here hear this. There's this ongoing bit where ah the people at school where Darius is in the 15th grade give him empanadas to bring home. Darius loves empanadas.
Speaker: And they give him some empanadas to bring home so he can have them with his mom, Irisa, who sucks. We don't need to talk about her. And then it's like, dude, the empanadas make it home or Darius eat all the empanadas on the bus?
Speaker: Dude, it's fucking wild. Oh my god. Dude, everyone give it up for Darius' dad. My guy's just in in one of one ah one of every 100 videos on just just relatable guy. Just keeps two guitars next to his nightstand ah and his bed.
Speaker: Can totally relate to that.
Speaker: Give it up for his dad. Give it up. What's his dad's name? I have no idea. Probably like Baltimore or something. Yes.
Speaker: He looks like, yeah. That's definitely the vibe. Baltimore, Mr. Darius. mr Mr. Baltimore.
Speaker: Mr. Maryland. mr maryilyn
Speaker: ah We need to, let's bring back those names for people. We've gone way too, growing up there was always a bunch of continents, girls named continents, different continents in my grade.
Speaker: and everything's crazy now. black guys named michael we need to bring those back we're going we're going far we're separating you know yes come back to to everybody everybody being in the name family besides some poor girls that are named after different continents around the world and that's fine or just brooklyn lot of brooklyn we know that we know the continents at least and i'm not yeah but some of this some of this is getting out of hand
Speaker: Wow, man. So he's stimming. Is that it, man? That's so funny. It was later Joe Rogan stimming in front of his guests. Yes.
Speaker: Oh, man. It releases endorphins, man. makes me really... Meme, meme, meme, meme, meme.
Speaker: that's it Just opening his podcast with stim. Dude, honestly. Wow, Joe, that's very good. I'll have you on Kiltonian next week. That's incredible. I love this stimming stuff.
Speaker: has Yeah, it has all is all his people stimming. like ah Like a cult leader just convinces them all. It's like this is like it's a form of meditation.
Speaker: No, it's like alpha brain, man. Like you get alpha brain and then you start stimming. It's it's absolutely incredible. Takes you to the next level, man. You clear all the bullshit out of your brain. you're that you're After you stim, all the bullshit's gone out of your brain.
Speaker: You're ready to face the day.
Speaker: ah love ah love Pink Floyd and stimming. I love both of those together.
Speaker: Yeah, we're out of there by 16 minutes in. And he still would post he would post the episode, which would be so funny to set the record for shortest Joe Yes. Where can where can everybody find? Oh, we're on everything. We actually are very. All right, guys. Well, the podcast is due to us. ah Thank you for coming in.
Speaker: Oh, my God. yeah Yeah, we're on, every we're very, actually, we have like, ah we're on like fucking audible too somehow.
Speaker: We're just. We've, ah we, all of our, all of our episodes are archived by the library of Congress. Yeah. If you find yourself in Washington, D.C., you can download our our episodes at the library.
Speaker: we're extremely out We're extremely findable. so it's always the That's always the best thing of anybody asking. There you go Wow. You guys do a podcast? Are you guys like on YouTube? where Oh, no. We're like on everything. absolutely We're like on and stuff I've never even heard of. We just post on to it.
Speaker: You ever heard of Boink Dump? We're there. We're there. We're actually one of the higher rated shows on Boink Dump.
Speaker: Yeah, and we're on eBay.
Speaker: Transcripts, posts of the random yeah ah feedback from purchases.
Speaker: yeah Yeah, we're huge on eBay. we're huge on ebay yeah yeah
Speaker: were We're on eBay podcast. it's a Actually, some of our most ah ah some of some of our highest engagement comes from the comment sections of other people's YouTube videos.
Speaker: Oh, my God.
Speaker: We're on eBay podcast. It's and like Brian Callan. He has his podcast on there. yeah
Speaker: Oh, my God.
Speaker: Oh, shit. and we see We appreciate everybody giving a telling their parents to listen and whatever. We see the the the downloads going up, so thank you.
Speaker: yeah thanks it's Shout out to Doak1 and his parents, Patrick C. and posse of... of of drifters, I guess.
Speaker: And Fanny Dantam and his blue collar guys holding it down. What's the guy's ah random guy in the Discord that replies like once every nine months and he comes and he's like... said Oh, Zepo? Is that him? Yeah. He's like, fuck all of your guys.
Speaker: a I hope everybody dies in here. Oh, I love that guy. Check these two... Ecuadorian boxers that I found.
Speaker: Oh, man. Shout out. chat Shout out. Zippo shout him out. Shout out. Zippo. Shout out. Zippo. the we do this. We do this for you.
Speaker: The jet. We wouldn't. We would be lost without you.
Speaker: um I had a note to in here of a.
Speaker: crows that crows run the world people think jews run the world but i think crows were run the world for real you know mean crows are mad smart you ever watch like those videos of crows which means like what they're willing to show us is is only a percentage of what they could actually do you know never you know you never just show everything you can do right off the bat you know what you never see is a dead crow no i think they it's like ants they they try very hard to make sure that you don't they clean each other up because they don't want you to know yeah i've never seen one if anybody's ever seen one leave a comment on the youtube page for that matter to be clear have you ever fucking seen a baby crow
Speaker: no There's a word, the word crow's nest. Everyone understands as the part of a boat, like a yeah pirate boat where like the guy with the binocular or the, whatever they call it, telescope.
Speaker: don't know what it's called. You know what I mean? Yeah. yeah Yes. It's, it's gotta have a word, but I don't know what it is. Uh, stands and looks for land.
Speaker: Uh, presumably that refers to an actual nest that crows would live in. But have you ever fucking seen that? Let alone crow babies. No, they don't let you see that shit, dude.
Speaker: No, if if there even are any, they don't let you behind the scenes. What if big crow in the same way that the Vatican made up all of world history before the fifteen hundreds What if the crow, what if big crow invented this term crow's nest?
Speaker: And everyone was like, well, it must refer to a real thing because why would they call the ship ah part of crow's nest? If there were no crow's nest when really it's fucking crows aren't born and they don't die.
Speaker: There's always been a million crows and there always will be a million crows. What about that? They don't fucking die. You're right. It's a great point. They run the world. They make all the transactions.
Speaker: Everything in the world that goes around because of that. Crow money. Yeah. They're watching you twenty four seven but There's always a crow around. And they remember faces for years. There's like some British guy. That's awesome.
Speaker: I don't know what happened. you like... you like hit a crow or something and pissed off that crow, all that crow's friends. And they remembered him and they were like attacking him all the time when he was walking around outside and they'd follow him around and dive bomb him and try to peck at him.
Speaker: And he fucking moved because he couldn't get away from the crows. And then like,
Speaker: I don't know, 10 years later or some shit, he had to go back to that town because like his mom died. And the crows immediately attacked him again. it was like They were like, these aren't even the same crows. Crows don't live that long. like This is a new generation of crows that the old crows told... It's the same generation. remember Remember that fucking guy.
Speaker: We just said it. They don't die. That's true. It's the same same gang of crows. They don't forget. Crows don't forget. We fucking killed your mom, too, you fucking Yes.
Speaker: It was a plan to bring him back. They were like, that that guy thinks he got away. They they did the thing that guy did of of lighting the forest fire to snipe the firefighters that crows killed his mom. Oh, my God. Also fucking crazy. How do we not talk about that?
Speaker: I haven't even read anything about it. I just saw it. I saw it today. i was like, whoa, holy shit. I mean, it's like... It's fucked up to laugh about it. That was like but my little reaction where was like, whoa, what the fuck?
Speaker: ah Yeah, it's pretty like... ah un I don't know what the word is. like Not super insightful at this point to be like to be like, wow, things are like... The world is really fucked up and in particular the country we live in.
Speaker: Holy shit. bam but uh yeah that was about my reaction i was like every you know you think you think you're like maybe desensitized to things you're like oh yeah like we've we've had a guy who shot politicians before like that minnesota thing no yeah kind of scary but like we've had a guy who that uh that woman uh the astronaut's wife she got shot i think hey i'll tell you one thing a crow a crow could have looked out that ring doorbell and been like that guy's wearing a mask oh yeah they recognize faces you would have known i think there's a guy steve scalise or whatever he got shot at a baseball game it's happened before then you hear
Speaker: That a guy intentionally started a fire so he could kill the firefighters who show up. Jesus fucking Christ.
Speaker: And I'll tell you one thing, those firefighters, they make it known that they're coming. Bro, yeah, they're not trying to hide. And I think for all of our country's history, since probably since they invented firefighting, which was like, I think jeffer are ah Benjamin Franklin invented it. So it's been a long time.
Speaker: We've all kind of agreed that firefighters are like chill. They're off limits. yeah Not even off limits, just like no one ever had the idea. Like, you can hate... uh you can hate cops obviously you can hate politicians sometimes people get pissed at doctors because they like didn't save your wife or whatever firefighters i don't i've never heard an anti-firefighter take never now what in my life like yeah they uh choose to put out fires yeah they they there's like we s fly better one job better paying jobs
Speaker: that don't involve fire. They do this one anyway. even save people's lives while they're checking like carbon monoxide levels at your house.
Speaker: And they kind of have a monopoly on the like water to put fires out. like you could like Your hoes can't do it. They have a whole network around the country. We cared about it enough to give them that. To be like, all right, every...
Speaker: Every hundred feet on every street the entire country, there's going to be a place for firefighters to get water. Don't fucking park there. Don't park there.
Speaker: You can't park there. Maybe that's the one guy that had the beef with it. He got his car towed. Yeah, we got to look into that and figure out. He's I'm going fucking take some firefighters out. Where the beef came from. These motherfuckers are going to get
Speaker: yeah I read... ah why I guess I had that reaction. It was like... which is probably a lie i don't know you'll have to look it up but it was like guy that uh failed the fire exam because he was too short sniped snipes firefighters i was like holy shit which is also respectfully um taking it out on the wrong people yeah
Speaker: I mean, he lit that thing, and like I said, he heard them coming. He was like, it's game time.
Speaker: Yeah, that's one where, like, who do you... who you who Well, first of all, kind of proof that... I know that he probably... Like, they were probably trying to be nice.
Speaker: People... people get it wrong when you're trying to be nice. Like if you, ah don't hire somebody and you don't want to tell them like, yeah, dude, it's because you gave us the fucking creeps in the interview. yeah You look like you're going to like sniff girls chairs after they get up. We can't hire you.
Speaker: Like you can't say that. So you're like, Oh yeah, man. It's just like, like we're like looking for someone with more experience, uh, in like, uh, you know, some of the things that you don't have a lot of experience in. Yeah. Um, things you definitely don't have experience. So yes, that's like mainly the problem. So probably he took the firefighter exam. They were like, this guy looks like somebody who would fucking shoot someone.
Speaker: We can't hire him as a firefighter. um and they don't want him coming back every year to take the exam because like, bro, so they were like trying to be nice about be like, Hey man, like it's not personal, but, uh, you know, just because, because we're a safety profession and, and, and, you know, you gotta have a certain physical requirement and, and, and we do, you know, we do require you to be over five, seven, to be a firefighter. That's just, that's not, you know, that's just for the safety of everyone that we help. So like,
Speaker: We really appreciate that you want to be a firefighter. I'm sorry this didn't work out. And they said that to him when really the answer was that you're a fucking creep. And he didn't he didn't even pick it up. So, also kind of proved prove their point. Why you should have been hired.
Speaker: lot of fireman's temperament, I would say. Sir, too small and... I don't believe you're going to run into a burning building to help someone if this is how you react by a little bit of rejection.
Speaker: Guys got a hell of a shot though, probably.
Speaker: probably what he was saying to himself. Hell of a shot. See what I could have done with a fucking... I'll show you. I could have done with a fucking... I'll show you. there
Speaker: Imagine if the they caught him off guard and they started stealth firefighting, walking up all the fire gear hundreds of miles into the forest. That's something you'd never expect.
Speaker: Sometimes with the cops you get ambushed, but you get ambushed by the fire department. You're like what the fuck?
Speaker: Now that's what they're going to have to do all over the place. You got ah a three level apartment building. you got a You don't know if the fire department is even there yet. No. You're like, oh shit, are they coming? I know that thing happened, so now they have to be stealthy about it.
Speaker: Yeah, no, you're gonna there's going to be like a like a TSA pre-check for fire departments. Yeah, it's like undercover firefighters coming onto the scene.
Speaker: Oh, it looks like you got pretty ripping fire, huh? Like, yeah, you a firefighter? Are you the fucking firefighter? are you fire department? Please.
Speaker: oh yeah, what would I do if I was the fire department?
Speaker: What would you want me to do if I was the fire department, huh?
Speaker: like all right all right All right, boys, this guy's good. This guy's good. We can...
Speaker: Prostitution sting but for firefighters going up to your place.
Speaker: If I was the fire department, what do you want? Like, full service? you want You want us to... Yes, please. i have my There's two families still in there. This place is burning down.
Speaker: What do you know about them? Yeah.
Speaker: All right, we're good. We're clear. We're clear. All good. Let's start putting this fire out.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah, ah white white Caucasian male, he's over six foot. We're clear. We're all good. All good to come in. This guy could easily been a firefighter. We're all clear. Let's attack. Let's bring up to bring up the engines.
Speaker: Or maybe they'll just start sacrificing EMTs because no one really, you know, EMTs, I guess, are kind of like, yeah you know, you know. Definitely like an under appreciated problem. Like, ah yeah I don't want to say underappreciated in a way that I'm, I'm saying like, we should be more appreciative of our paramedics and EMTs. I mean, like you definitely just don't even notice they're there ever.
Speaker: now People are like, we'd thank our first responders, the firefighters and the police. EMT should get it. Bro. What about those guys? Because they're shoving Narcan up fucking people's noses all the time.
Speaker: Yeah, dude. I bet being AT kind of sucks. Hey, wake up. Wake up, buddy. Hey, here you are. All right. Okay. That's got to be even more than like an yeah ER nurse. That's got to be like a wildly cynical profession.
Speaker: Then like most like every like two out of six people when you'd like save their life. Then they're always like, get me the fuck out of this ambulance. Get out. It's the fucking going to be $90,000. You're like, nope, we just saved your life. We have to bring you to the emergency room.
Speaker: Pull over. pull Pull the fuck over. I need to get out of this thing. i didn't I didn't authorize this. who Who said you could do this? ah goy Man, you were unconscious, face down, on a flight of stairs. Yeah.
Speaker: Come on, man. you were just you were You were fucking passed out in the Dunkin' Donuts again, dude. We had to save your life for the third time. You should let me die.
Speaker: Great. Now I'm basically dead in medical debt. Thanks a lot. This is fucking great.
Speaker: Yeah, they definitely ah looked past. There's never an EMT throwing out like the first pitch at a baseball game or something. And they all get paid like $28 an hour too.
Speaker: They all should be bumped up. Bump them up. give them a Give them great. They deserve more.
Speaker: Yeah, whatever. Yeah, they can have... That's an easy ambush target though too, unfortunately. Oh, EMTs? You just pull the Undertaker them, or are you just acting like you're dead, and you just fucking wake up stabbing right in the fucking head? Yes. Oh, absolutely. And dude, they'll just run in.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. You know what I mean? If EMTs get to your... If you call 911, and EMTs get there before cops, and it's not... Obviously, I guess 911 would probably be like, yeah, it was like a shooting.
Speaker: So like maybe they're safe well maybe they're more... so careful then, but if it was just like, yeah, some guy, like, oh man, my dad passed out and I don't know. I think the EMTs just barge into your house.
Speaker: Yeah, of course. it's like ah It's exactly what you see on Grand Theft Auto with the EMTs. They just have no limits. They just barge into everywhere. Yeah.
Speaker: Do you think i I'm not... Don't get me wrong, guys. I'm not saying to ambush EMTs, like stab them in the head, you know, but... Well, if an EMT comes in your house, and you give them the the the yeah home alone treatment where you're like, oh, I'm in the kitchen. Then you just drop a paint bucket down.
Speaker: chi um hit him with a bucket that doesn't kill him. yeah You know, in the way that a fucking gallon paint bucket dropped from two stories down wouldn't kill you.
Speaker: ah Exactly. Oh, don't come get me. I'm in the bathroom.
Speaker: Sir, we were to understand you were having a cardiac episode. Uh-oh. um My arm feels tingly.
Speaker: It's two pissed off EMT people coming in now.
Speaker: I have a penicillin allergy. What are you going to do?
Speaker: um Then you have to call EMTs for those EMTs. That's just a circle of just... Yes. Doing like until you get to the end of Home Alone 2 of pranks on them.
Speaker: yeah You do like the nail and tar and feathers on them. Just bodies just piling up.
Speaker: Then I think eventually you call on you have to call in the National Guard or something. Yeah, I think that's exactly, it works. GTA got it right. Eventually, yeah just you get to five stars and the and the army comes.
Speaker: The Navy fucking comes and everybody, after you're like 14th EMT, that's what happens. If you're in LA, the army just comes.
Speaker: Or all the Marines, I guess. True. They're already there, so. you're all right If you're in LA, five stars already. yeah as soon as yeah you steal the tit You steal the tip bucket from Starbucks, instantly five star five stars. Boom, your fucking helicopter's right above your head inside of the Starbucks.
Speaker: You're fucking done.
Speaker: Shouldn't have elected a gay governor.
Speaker: Yeah. Thanks a lot. Thanks a lot, fucking bitch.
Speaker: Oh, so that's good. ah That's good. Let's see. ah
Speaker: I got to get a plug in of our our YouTube account. Okay. Pretty sure if you just look up like Dudes R Us podcast, but it's Drew Boys.
Speaker: D-R-U-B-O-Y-Z is the handle. D-R-U-B-O-Y-Z. Subscribe. Like all the videos.
Speaker: ah and Comment on them. submit Yeah, comment on them. Submit your votes into the poll that I posted last night. ah get Get your votes in there, guys. It's pretty important.
Speaker: We're finally on YouTube. That's what everyone's been saying. You just got to get on YouTube. So here we are. You just got to get on YouTube. You got to figure it out. You got to post a poll.
Speaker: Everything. We're on here.
Speaker: You know? The fuck was that? Oh, my mic's picking up people outside. Holy shit. ah What do you got? What do you got going on outside?
Speaker: I don't know. it's it's I was going to say earlier, if the audio and on this episode ends up being weird, it's because there's a fucking crazy lightning storm um going on outside.
Speaker: Crazy rain and shit. But some woman, some Indian woman just walked by. Well, I don't know she was Indian. I just assumed. I want her to be. yeah um You always do. But yeah.
Speaker: but yeah Weirdly through the window. Picked up really clearly on my mic. I do have a bit prepared. It's ah it's a lot. Okay.
Speaker: i It's July. We're recording this on July 1st. That's correct. It's the first day of ah National Bison Month.
Speaker: Okay. Oh, God. Bison. ah The American bison. Also known as... Also incorrectly known as as a buffalo. Buffalo!
Speaker: Yes!
Speaker: And I thought ah to celebrate, you know, bison's my probably my favorite animal. I like the way they look like big fucking angry cows. Okay. And so I thought we could celebrate ah Buffalo month.
Speaker: Yes. But I'm going to find. All right. Here's the game. i I spent like, I would have had more prepared for this episode. I went down a rabbit hole. I spent four hours today researching bison.
Speaker: Bison facts. Yes. I'm going to read
Speaker: five. Five of these bison facts. Okay. one of them ah have One of them I have hidden a fake fact. Not true. okay It would have been better if Paul was here because you would have had ah two chances between the twos of you.
Speaker: um and I'm going to read these facts and then you and then if you guess the correct, if you guess the fake fact, I will eat the Alfredo from Target.
Speaker: How does that sound? If I guess the fake one? You got to spot the fake. One in five chance. Okay. How's this sound? Yes. Deal. All right.
Speaker: and All right. Great. right. Bison facts. Here we go. ah Bison, also known as also incorrectly known as Buffalo.
Speaker: Yes. ah Can't walk backwards. Just like emus, just like kangaroos. It's not that they don't like to walk backwards.
Speaker: their legs just don't work that way. Got it. Fact number one.
Speaker: Fact number two. Have you ever noticed bison have a hump on their back? It doesn't store water like a camel. They're actually barely even related to camels.
Speaker: Okay. it's stored It stores an oily fat called Minerge. At one point when we were killing all the buffalo,
Speaker: I wasn't ready for that. Buffalo! There you go. At one point when we killing all the buffalo.
Speaker: It's going to take us home. ah When you're killing all the buffalo, ah people thought it could be used for lamps and stuff. But apparently it burns dirty and smells bad.
Speaker: Fact number two. Ew. Jesus Christ. Yeah. we I mean, that's remember why we whaled a bunch in the past? That was pretty much why we just wanted the whale oil for lamps. They thought they do with buffalo. Buffalo oil, bad.
Speaker: Fact number three. In the 18th century, French explorers rounded up a bunch of bison ah from the Louisiana French colony and brought them back to France to try to domesticate them.
Speaker: ah but they ended up killing people and so they shot them all. Okay. Jesus Christ. Fact number, that was fact number three. Fact number four, our 26th president, President Teddy Roosevelt, kept the pet bison at the White House named Roscoe.
Speaker: ah It was in the White House stables for seven months and then they decided to demolish the stables and build some shit. there And so they donated Roscoe to the Smithsonian Zoo where they probably just should have put him from the start or I guess maybe left him in the field.
Speaker: Okay. Fact number four. Fact number five. Bison can communicate infrasonically. They make low-pitched groans that resonate through their bones and into the ground.
Speaker: And then other bison can detect that over long distances. It's thought that this evolved so that the herd could communicate during blizzards and thunderstorms that are common in the Great Plains.
Speaker: Fact number five.
Speaker: One of those facts is fake. Okay. What was the second one with the hump again? What's stored in there?
Speaker: Shit. Ever notice bison have a hump on their back? It doesn't store water like a camel. They're barely related to camels. It stores an oily fat called Minerge.
Speaker: At one point when we were killing all the buffalo...
Speaker: ah people thought it could be used for lamps and stuff, but apparently it burns really dirty and smells like shit. That's a fake one. No. What gave it away? Is that true?
Speaker: Minerge. No, that's a fake one. That is the fake one? That's the fake one, which means I have to eat fucking what? Pasta?
Speaker: Pasta from the Target? Chicken Alfredo. Fuck, this is a nightmare. jerry four the If anybody has a Target, usually today ever inside of the Target, just like how there's a scabot. have one.
Speaker: And you go in there and they have, I looked at the menu. For some reason, they do have chicken Alfredo, which probably is just frozen. So it might not be that bad. I didn't believe it was real. or It has to prepare it.
Speaker: Yeah, I didn't believe it was real when you first mentioned it. And then for a long time, I thought i live in a classy town with a target that wouldn't have a pizza hut in it.
Speaker: That's a crazy, why would that be? And then I looked and it has one. And it's like, it's like there's, there's a Starbucks there too. Very prominent. yeah Right. When you walk in very nice, the target pizza hut is like behind the eyeglasses place yes on the way to the bathroom.
Speaker: Like you, like you will miss it. Yeah. But it's there. All right. Well, that sucked. i I regret doing this bit.
Speaker: ah But the other four facts are absolutely true. ah tell them to your kids. They're true facts. So keep going.
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. the The way the second one ended with where you said like lamps and stuff, that's gave it away. Minerge didn't give it away? yeah i mean... That could just be a mispronounced word.
Speaker: Minerge. And, uh, yeah, lamps and... You were basically like, had lamps and shit. I don't know. ah Well, i wrote these.
Speaker: All of them. Lamps and shit. And it smelled like shit. That's what it was. Lamps and it smelled like shit.
Speaker: Oh, man. Yeah, that was that was good. and all right. Well, happy. That was my tribute to Bison Month.
Speaker: do the buffalo Hit the buffalo again.
Speaker: Yes. The best sound ever. If anybody's wondering what that is, it's the Buffalo. No one's wondering. Buffalo's slot machine at your local casino.
Speaker: Yeah, everyone knows what that sound means. Like running buffaloes or running bison is one of the two. I don't know. Oh, as we established at the beginning of this bit. ah Buffalo technically is a misnomer.
Speaker: ah Buffalo is like an Asian. That's where you get mozzarella cheese from or whatever. Yeah. Okay. ah the The Great Plains cow fucking thing is a bison.
Speaker: But we also call them we also call em buffalo sometimes, like buffalo bill. That's referring to bison. but Got it. You know you know how science people are. They get real pissed when you call things the wrong thing.
Speaker: Correct. That's correct. Technically, they're bison, but they're also buffalo.
Speaker: Okay. Yeah.
Speaker: and And there's a lot of big Buffalo Bison slot machine guys on Instagram that people would have to follow. Look them up. They all love Buffalo.
Speaker: That was a, that's it. Speak of the devil. I think I had said that there, there's a fucking thunderstorm going on and I had a power spike and we lost connection.
Speaker: That's correct. You were just listening to aid and say, no and then, uh, and then it went and then you, and then you heard nothing.
Speaker: And now you're hearing us talk now very abruptly. that's fucking why yes correct um yeah so uh everyone go join like subscribe comment on all the youtube videos d-r-u-b-o-y-z drew boys on youtube um the episodes will be on there along with obviously like Apple, Spotify, Audible.
Speaker: Boink dump. Boink dump eBay podcasts. ah Facebook, whatever you want. Literally everyone. Casting wide Tell your friends and family we're about to blow up. This is about to be a rocket ship to the moon.
Speaker: We're growing and climbing every week with new downloads and new listeners. So let's keep it going. The ones that have been here since day one will never forget you. And you'll always be right there with us on the way up.
Speaker: So thank you, everybody. yeah And let's have a great night. Boom.
