Transcript
Speaker: Welcome to Dudes R Us.
Speaker: Now let's start the show. All right, it's recording.
Speaker: Hell yeah. Full squad. Episode 89, probably. Something like that. Fuck yeah. Fuck yeah. 89 episodes since they took our our Prince Greg Floyd away from us.
Speaker: God, has it really been 89? as it has We won't stop podcasting until justice is served. Until um
Speaker: that cop. There you go. Until he's, a
Speaker: you know. There we go. Pretty sure he's in jail. Yeah, but is that really justice? Let's be real here. Maybe that dude who just walked into that building and started shooting people was looking for him.
Speaker: Every minute that he's breathing air is a minute that joy floor George Floyd didn't get to breathe air. So think about that. You fucking.
Speaker: Paul, I think your levels are down. Think about that. Maybe I'm just sitting too far away. Yeah, he's seven. You do see your wave your waveform does look mad small.
Speaker: Paul's at his neighbor's house for podcasting. He's got a can and string situation going on. He's in the upstairs living room just with a talking into a can.
Speaker: which Which way do you turn the game to get more games? Oh, fuck yes. Hell yeah. This is the best kind of intro. I love that we all do this intro every two episodes. Is that worse? That seems worse.
Speaker: um It doesn't seem. Yeah, it does seem a little bit worse. Okay, now it's right in the middle of the top. Does that seem better? no I can fix. I'll just. that's i so I just can't hear. I just need to hear him in my headphones.
Speaker: Oh, you can't hear him. All right, my bad. Oh, no, I just got to turn my volume up. Here we go. Can you hear me now if I get that close? That still sounds like Paul's in East Africa.
Speaker: That's fucking weird because I haven't touched this microphone at all since the last week. Usually if I hear you, it's fine. I'll fix the levels when I do the ah post-production.
Speaker: I mean, the gain is up. I can hear i can hear you clicking. There we go. get get gave get um um I wonder if it's coming through my oh yeah webcam and not my microphone. Click into it.
Speaker: How do I click into it?
Speaker: Go to call settings. I'm clicking on that shit. I won't do nothing. Oh, man. think we got to restart. We are fucked. Yeah, think we got to restart. We're not restarting.
Speaker: can't have my microphone through my fucking webcam. It's going to sound terrible. All right, Paul, what about this? You click left. There's a microphone on the left side where the browser is. Yeah, do you have that?
Speaker: Hit the Darius Stibbing bud. get, get, gay gay get, get. We're on fucking fire. Oh my God. Our fucking retention rate is going be so good this month. We're on rice tomorrow.
Speaker: Does she talk about rice a lot? He loves rice. He wants rice tomorrow. Rice tomorrow, right? Do you want rice tomorrow? Yes, he loves rice. That's his favorite food.
Speaker: Now we're back. fucking Fucking webcams. Too much gain. Yeah, your game is actually kind of high. All right, I'll turn that down a little bit. go Just a smidgerine. Maybe that was too much.
Speaker: um smidgey back up there we go well what may or may not be obvious to the listeners is is the the feed just cut out after Paul unplugged his webcam oh we're recording?
Speaker: yeah we're recording i I'm going to unplug my um
Speaker: um what i'm what I'm curious about now is why was your webcam the more recently used device on your computer? I had to do a ah telemedicine thing with Dana Farber to find out if I have turbo cancer. Yeah, fine. Jesus Christ. I was trying to be light and figured you and Colt were fucking showing your dick to clear people's word. Good job, Jared.
Speaker: Good job, dude. No, I was just chatting with the woman at Dana Farber, genetic counselor. Jesus Christ. You fucking asshole.
Speaker: It's cool. I just have to get a blood test.
Speaker: Hell yeah, bro. Not a crip test. Am I right, guys? Hit the button. Yeah. Hit the fucking button. I don't have that one anymore.
Speaker: Free Derek Chauvin.
Speaker: right, let's kick it off. Here we go.
Speaker: Nothing. What? What am I trying to do? What?
Speaker: I don't know what's happening. ah what's What's been going on in the town? There we go. There's the one we were looking for.
Speaker: yeah that's what I need. i Hit the button, baby. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker: oh yeah he yeah
Speaker: Fuck yeah. Everyone hear this? Everyone say, does sound good? Everyone think it sounds okay?
Speaker: Man, that that noise is so annoying. It makes me want to grab a gun and go shoot up a building. Speaking of that... I'm only vaguely aware of what happened today. So I need somebody to give me yesterday.
Speaker: all that was yesterday. See, I need somebody to give me the light. ah yeah, it was yesterday. ah bridged version. know. Some dude walked into the building with a gun and started shooting people.
Speaker: He went to the 33rd floor. Apparently he said he had a beef with the NFL. Went to the wrong floor. but He could be on his podcast. He'd fit right in. Wait, this was about the NFL?
Speaker: Something that I read. don't know. I've been just reading all the conspiracy things. is that His suicide note said that he had an issue with the NFL ah because of...
Speaker: CTE they share a building with this, these people. Interesting. and he went to the wrong floor and ended up at Blackstone, which is apparently it's like a subsidiary of Black Rock.
Speaker: Yeah. Subsidiary area of Black Hawk. And it's not, uh, it's not the guys who make the grill unbeknownst to me. Holy sir shit. That's hilarious.
Speaker: Different company. I guess like gas up there. I was like, damn, this dude went on a shooting spree because he's his grill fucking got rusty. ah like I can't fucking deal with it anymore. There's a lot of cover up there. They could just duck behind a bunch of Blackstones, you know? That's right.
Speaker: But yeah, I'm going to fact check that really quick about the NFL. I did hear the NFL was involved. I just didn't really pay a ton of attention to the to that.
Speaker: Yep, there we go Headline from ESPN. New York City shooter targeted NFL headquarters claimed to have CTE. Damn. Damn, and he couldn't even do it right. He took took the elevator the wrong floor.
Speaker: damn i mean, it's crazy that he killed... that he just accidentally killed an executive at BlackRock. That's why the conspiracy forums are going crazy.
Speaker: They love it. As well, they should. Oh, yeah. They love it right now. If there's anything to be like, I don't know. This seems kind of... It's definitely that.
Speaker: That's the bullets bouncing off all the Blackstone grills up there. oh That's actually funny as fuck. You're like, holy shit, they shot the CEO of the Flat Top Grill Company?
Speaker: That's right. i was like, damn. No wonder they've been on sale lately. Not the one who's fucking crying, bawling his Fucking Adam, 4th of July party. Fucking open it up. It's rusted.
Speaker: You look like a fool out there. I'm so fucking mad. I'm to take this gun and walk through New York City with it. going to buy a sanding stone from Home Depot and get oil and fucking redo it.
Speaker: I mean, if if anything... I think the crazier shit about this is that it shows that people in New York City just don't give a fuck. And you can walk down the middle of the road.
Speaker: I got to imagine this is in you know Times Square or somewhere, a financial district. yeah You can walk down the sidewalk with a fucking AR-15 with a can on it, openly, with gloves on.
Speaker: And no one stops or says anything or is like, holy shit. I'm going to grab one of like the 75 cops that are just standing around doing nothing. May I ask what race the shooter was?
Speaker: He was a light-skinned guy. He looked like an anime black guy. Kind of looked like Lionel Richie a little bit. Yes, exactly like rhino Lionel Richie.
Speaker: Oh, my God. Okay. That's surprising, actually, that he just... the he could have just walked down Fifth Avenue with... Holy shit. I thought Guy Ritchie and Lionel Richie were the same guy until right now. I just Googled it.
Speaker: No, Guy Ritchie is a gay white man. Wow, that makes so much more sense. Lionel Richie is a light-skinned black gentleman. Wow. I remember... Jared, i was talking to you about Snatch i was saying i can't believe that guy made me. I thought he only made music.
Speaker: Yeah. Then you were pretty confused. Holy shit. Holy shit. That makes so much sense now. Oh my God. I was like, I thought he had a music video with David Bowie, like dancing all weird and shit out there. You know what I mean?
Speaker: Or maybe I'm just thinking of crossing over him and Prince now. What is... Oh, my God. Sorry. Go on. Yeah, he did look exactly like like... Oh, my God. This is crazy right now.
Speaker: My brain's all fucked up.
Speaker: Wow. Okay. And...
Speaker: God damn. I think that's pretty crazy. He also was from Las Vegas or something. Yeah, I saw a football interview of him, actually. Well...
Speaker: I mean, Las Vegas is cool.
Speaker: Yeah, i saw a football interview with him and he was actually like, I think he just played high school football too.
Speaker: um He definitely wanted to get caught by walking down the middle of the fucking road with AR-15 and then when he got up there he panicked and went to the wrong floor yep he didn't do any due diligence dude like he didn't do any of the Luigi Mangione due diligence no he doesn't he's wearing a pair of sunglasses he's just like him he's actually he's got a pretty cool fit on dude he's got like a members only jacket with some sunglasses and like ah it looks like some pair of Vans it's looking pretty cool I love Lionel Richie he fucking rocks dude
Speaker: Lionel Richie's so freaking cool, man.
Speaker: looks like he's ready to sing a song.
Speaker: You think he said something cool when he went into the blaze? Like, you sold me a bad grill.
Speaker: He's probably just like ah doing the schizophrenic rent where he's like, fuck you know what I mean? Oil, heat, high heat, oil. I don't know the rotation.
Speaker: So much rust all over it. Read them and weep, boys. you so When I'm done with you, they're going to have to scrape you off the black stone.
Speaker: There you go. There you It's a fucking fucking Guy Ritchie and Lionel Ritchie, two different people, broke his brain, shot up the fucking place.
Speaker: Jesus Christ. Yeah. I need to get more info on this guy. And what's the, Paul, what's the connection of it being on the 33rd floor? What is that? Oh, yeah. People thought that was some crazy shit.
Speaker: What does that mean? I don't know. That's too deep for me. 33. Most
Speaker: most of the conspiracy theories that I know about are fun. Imagine just working on a normal floor that has nothing. you know This guy just comes up there. you're like, what the fuck?
Speaker: Fuck. But he did get somebody that worked for the NFL, though, but I don't know where he came into him. They guy they had some crazy-ass pictures of people.
Speaker: it doesn't say where they were in the building, but they've piled like all the furniture from their office in front of the door. I saw that. Shout out to those people. Hell yeah. yeah that dude They had like 9 million couches up there somehow because the picture literally like 100,000 couches on top of each other.
Speaker: Where all you really need, where you see those things, it's like to jam a door. It's like you just got to put like a pencil in it at just a right angle and no one could ever open it.
Speaker: Or you can do the things where... i'm sorry
Speaker: Where'd he shoot himself? In the heart? I'm pretty sure shot himself in the head. oh my god. That's actually hilarious if he did. He's so stupid. He missed the floor.
Speaker: He's like, please examine my brain. just They're just like, well, you ruined that. This guy fucked up in every single way possible. actually i have no idea where he shot himself. That was just a but just a guess. Yeah.
Speaker: Then he randomly got some guy just by accident in an NFL, maybe like in the elevator or something.
Speaker: Damn, can you imagine that? That's like just shit luck. Oh, yeah. Especially that guy taking you off guard where you're like in the black Blackstone office and you're like, what is that? That guy look looks like Lionel Richie. Oh, my God. He has a fucking AR-15. Oh, my fucking God.
Speaker: Oh, damn. Easy E's coming up here. It looks pretty fucking cool. Oh, my God. He's got a fucking gun. He's got an assault rifle on us.
Speaker: Oh my gosh. Or he could have been super polite where he's like, is this the NFL office? And they're like, no, it's 34. And he goes, okay, have a great day. And he just walks back. Yeah. It's like,
Speaker: Bro, he never even played for the NFL? No, I think he just played in high school.
Speaker: This is all insane.
Speaker: Blackstone shooter. Now this is going to be on my fucking computer forever.
Speaker: Yeah, pretty crazy. Jesus Christ. Who else fucking died? NYPD officer? Where the fuck did that guy come from? That's why Dave Portnoy is selling a back to blue t-shirt.
Speaker: Yeah. Oh, my God.
Speaker: What a fucking loser.
Speaker: Yeah, I mean, nobody deserves to just get killed while they're at work. but All right. I know the cop died. It's kind of fucking sad. It's obviously very sad. He had a family, but I mean, he was providing security at the building.
Speaker: i says Yeah, I mean, obviously fucked up. That's his job. He was doing his job. You signed up for this guy. I don't think he was doing his job too well. I mean, also facts.
Speaker: You know, i you got to be on alert, dude. That's your only job, unfortunately. I know I saw. And again, the security picture of the guy, Tamora. Weird name.
Speaker: ah He's just walking. Just walking with a gun.
Speaker: Jesus Christ. He's literally walking right in. This is an insane picture. so i'm saying. He's just walking down the middle of the street with a fucking AR-15 with a suppressor on it.
Speaker: It's like the one of the biggest guns you can walk around with. what if like the i I'm looking at the picture of all the couches piled up. What if he just like they did all this and then it's just like a pull door instead of a push?
Speaker: They just open it up. Holy shit. All the furniture falls out. Yeah, exactly. What's up with all this? I'm fucking pissed off even more now.
Speaker: Like AR-15 is not like a huge weapon if you really think about it. But for like an everyday person to see, it's it's a pretty big gun. Oh my God. There's like two guys walking, two business bros walking behind him as like he's entering the building.
Speaker: Just ignoring what's going on. right People just mind their own business, dude. They're dude, you got two Zins? Ha ha ha. Dude, I heard these weren't even addictive or anything on the podcast I listened to.
Speaker: These guys are saying it's not even addictive, dude. I heard these things are good for you. Good for your brain. They stave off Alzheimer's. Oh, my God. This is true. well I heard that,
Speaker: So what did he go in? Blast the cop? The cop fucking didn't draw quick enough. Jesus Christ. I'm sure you can find video of it. Which again is like...
Speaker: which again is like I don't know. Your job was to stop things like this from happening. He made it to the 33rd floor. 33rd. That's a lot of fucking floors, dude.
Speaker: It means do you go elevator all the way up there?
Speaker: When tomorrow entered three 45 Park Avenue, police say he immediately opened fire on NYPD officer, then shot a woman who took cover. He then sprayed the lobby with gunfire.
Speaker: And shot a security guard at the elevator bank. Oh, that's even terrifying. Gunman left bullet holes in a large NFL crest on the wall by one of the elevator banks.
Speaker: So this was all... That was on the first floor.
Speaker: He immediately opened fire when he entered. i mean, that just fucking sucks. That's just shit luck, dude. and
Speaker: Damn, dude. So he they knew he was coming up there. Yes. so yeah So he opened fire in the lobby when he walked in, killed the cop, and shot the security guard. Shot on an elevator. mean, I guess there's not that much time. You can't really hear those shots, probably.
Speaker: Yeah, probably wouldn't have heard it that far up. But then gets on an elevator, chooses the wrong floor. Yeah, he didn't do his due diligence. Literally, you didn't even case it for at all.
Speaker: Picks the wrong floor, goes to the Blackrock floor, then just shoots... Blackstone, Jared. Blackstone. Sorry. Goes to the Blackstone floor, and then just shoots the first first person he sees.
Speaker: Like, are you Roger Goodell? i Get on the floor, Roger! home Keep my fucking brain intact.
Speaker: but be I mean, it's all, you know, all parody, but it would be funny if he walked in there AR and he had like a full pads and helmet on. Fuck this shit. Oh, dress the part. Dressed as a fuck. Yeah. Yeah. That would be amazing. Just as a cornerback in the NFL.
Speaker: Just goes in and fucking Will Smith's him. Keep my name, keep my wife's name out your fucking mouth. It's a crazy fucking, a crazy fucking way to just watch. It's like, I mean, he definitely watched a bunch of movies, so he just walked in and just started fucking firing shots off.
Speaker: God damn. Pop, pop, pop, pop. Shot the fucking crest of the NFL. That's a crazy thing to be angry at.
Speaker: This is poetic. It's like, dude, relax. Everybody wants football to come back this season.
Speaker: He does look like a super. His most recent picture is so black guy anime. It hurts. He has the craziest. He has zero lineup at all.
Speaker: And it looks like he cuts like the side of his hair at a different length. And like he cuts his side of his hair like a four. And then he gets to the top of his head and cuts it out like a two for some reason.
Speaker: Yeah, he's got definitely the barber situation.
Speaker: would be way smarter if he just like played off the Blackstone thing. Like, I meant to fucking do this. These CEOs, these financial CEOs are ruining the country.
Speaker: Oh, it's way better. they just everyone would Dude, it would have been Luigi Mangione Part 2 if you were like, yeah, I'm pissed that Blackstone is buying up all the residential housing and oh yeah and making it unaffordable for... He's 27, making it unaffordable for Gen Z to buy a house.
Speaker: he'd actually yeah He'd be a hero. and said he's like that They're like, ya it was ah it see yeah, he had a CTE from high school football. Loser.
Speaker: He didn't even make it to the NFL to get What a fucking loser. What a fucking loser. and then whatever And then whatever it was was so bad that you couldn't even get the right floor.
Speaker: White CEO killers do a better job. There you go, Jerry.
Speaker: You're Mexican, though, so that's not a hate crime. You can say that. good That's true. As far as I know, least in recent history, we'll leave like... You're gonna pass. We'll leave Che Guevara out of it, not that he was Mexican.
Speaker: We'll leave Cesar Chavez out of it. But, uh... You know. Get his ass. Not shooting any CEOs as far as I know. He kind of looks like a... yeah
Speaker: Like an Asian black guy. Yeah, he's got a he's got that eye situation. Yeah, he's a very tired eye looking.
Speaker: Kind of, I mean, that's crazy, dude. He does, I mean, and NFL. Fuck the shield. All right, relax, dude. Yeah, dude. That's very like, um I don't know, like so symbolic action in your mass shooting. It's kind of funny.
Speaker: You think, like, the story is pretty ridiculous. So do you think that, you know, Trump was just so pissed about South Park saying he had a small dick that he hired this guy to go shoot up Blackstone? That's my new conspiracy theory. You heard it here first, folks.
Speaker: Within the realm of possibility, dude. Trump was upset that South Park talked about the size of his dick. He's going to sue them. And instead of suing them, he hired a whatever this guy's name is to kill the NFL.
Speaker: Cause that's something that everybody loves. He wanted to take that away from you. Yeah. Just have to, you know, make everyone not pay attention to fucking Trump on the, in the Epstein files, anything for that. honestly I would feel like he's most worried about that.
Speaker: mean, that South Park episode was hilarious. I didn't actually watch it, but I heard it was like genuine, like Old South Park level good. It was very funny.
Speaker: And it's funny, and it's funnier in the context of like, you know, the shit that happened with ah like the Paramount deal and... Colbert.
Speaker: Yeah, Colbert getting cancelled and, you know, and then... like a week after that, they, the FCC approves the, the merger of Paramount Skydance. And then this happens with, with South Park. So it's like, i mean, all the respect to, uh, Matt Stone and Trey Parker for just like,
Speaker: Basically, like, daring him. Daring them to be like, yeah, fucking cancel us. Do it. why why did We want you to do it. Why did he get cancelled? I mean, conspiracy theory less so than, like, what's going on with the shooter, but, um... Ugh.
Speaker: ah So... Yeah. So... So, Paramount... yeah so the so paramount which is the movie studio and like Paramount plus and they own comedy central and fucking ABC or CBS. I mean, and, uh, and then a bunch of other shit, Nickelodeon yeah on MTV too.
Speaker: They probably own them. Yeah. It's Viacom. So anything that was Viacom back in the day, uh, they want to merge with a movie studio called skydance. That that's the movie studio that put out like top gun and mission impossible, like that kind of shit.
Speaker: Um, and that's been held up by the FCC because Trump sued 60 minutes for editing that Kamala Harris interview during the election.
Speaker: And then he won, and then he won the election. So he can be like, Hey, I don't have to, if you guys are, you know, aren't going to play ball with me. I don't have to approve this merger basically.
Speaker: So, ah so probably like a month ago, Paramount settled with Trump over the 60 minutes thing and agreed to give him $16 million. dollars And then, and then agreed to give him $20 million dollars of free advertising on like Paramount networks.
Speaker: Oh my, uh, CBS and and other like channels state run commercials. Literally. Yes. Literally. Yes. It's insane. Then like a week later, ah the late show announces it's being canceled and not like Stephen Colbert's off the air, but like, well, yes, Stephen Colbert's off the air, but like the late show is just not a thing anymore.
Speaker: Not being replaced. Just like gone. And so everyone's like, well, that's obviously like a side deal that they worked out, right? Yes, of course. like, here's $16 million, you know, all of the things in the background. They're like, yeah, also like, we don't like Colbert saying bad shit about Trump.
Speaker: So like, get him off the air. And they're like, fine, whatever. Good God. um
Speaker: And then, and so that happens. The FCC approves the merger, which also like, aside, the shit that skydance and, and, and, you know, the new paramount executives are saying like what they're going to do is, is absolutely insane. Also they're like, we, we need a movie studio that, that is America first and, and creates movies that, that further American interests abroad. Like today's movie studios are too afraid of China. And like, we need movie studios about how Israel did the pager bombings and stuff like that.
Speaker: Wacky, wacky shit coming down the pike as an aside. um But anyway. Related, unrelated to all of this.
Speaker: ah
Speaker: South Park had been like negotiating their whole deal of like what network they would end up on and how much money they're making and how many episodes like all that stuff had been happening in the background.
Speaker: And Matt's owner Trey Parker had refused to release any episodes of the new season until a deal was reached. Literally, like, that deal gets reached.
Speaker: They drop this the next season 27 or whatever season it is, and it's an episode that's just, like,
Speaker: fully like excoriating Trump, right? Like they use his actual face. and not Like, you know, not a cartoon character, like his, his picture. don't know if you are a big South Park person, but they did. Do you remember when they did Saddam Hussein?
Speaker: I know that skit. I have no idea about South Park too much, but I do know that one. And he's dating the devil. They just did that same skit, same voice, same everything, but with Trump's face.
Speaker: Ah, okay. Okay.
Speaker: And they did some bit at the end. I didn't i didn't watch it, and so I guess spoilers, but I heard so much about it already. There there was like a bit at the end that was like, AI generated like live action, like Trump, like wandering through the desert and then he like collapses and you just see his like tiny dick.
Speaker: Gotcha. Okay. Just like really dead, like really fucking dared him to. Oh, and then I should also say they showed all the dicks. Yes. They, uh, even on comedy central, that's how I watched on regular TV. They showed the dick because they put two googly eyes on it.
Speaker: Yeah. And they called it a character. hell yeah. Yeah. And then the joke in the end is, you know those commercials for Jesus, the ones he believes in us?
Speaker: Yes. flashes one of those, but about Trump. That's pretty fucking awesome. That's why he was going through the desert. He's Jesus. That's fucking awesome. I should say for... For the Kamala Harris interview that Trump sued CBS or 60 Minutes for, the amount he sued them for was $20 billion. Yes.
Speaker: Just an insane number. Yes. And so if that's how he felt about feeling like ah CBS deceptively edited an interview for the election, he won anyway. Yeah.
Speaker: uh you know the feeling now is like how he can't really back out on or the approve approving the the merger like that was approved so like how is he going to react to this because like if 20 billion was his was his a number for that like what's he going to do here
Speaker: um So they're basically daring him to sue and and fuck over Paramount. Okay. So pretty interesting.
Speaker: Pretty interesting bit of whatever, whatever media culture shit.
Speaker: Yep. Hell yeah.
Speaker: They also did a pretty funny thing when they were planning
Speaker: they're
Speaker: like, negotiating. They made a teaser trailer for or for season 27, and then it was totally fake, and none of the shit that was in it had anything to do with any of the episodes that they were actually cooking up.
Speaker: Nice. Which is pretty funny. Okay. Okay. I like that. Oh, yeah. Like, no, I mean, I guess somebody had to know this was coming because, like, it goes on the air. But very much like, yeah, this was under wraps kind of thing, which is interesting. interesting
Speaker: Jesus Christ. Very interesting. So what now Paramount has to play, like, Like how it's like the Block Island Ferry commercials, but it's like trump like Trump Island commercials for Epstein Island, basically.
Speaker: Yeah, basically, yeah. Come to the island of all your wildest temptations.
Speaker: Colt Duffy, number one person going wasn't privileged to go to the island. That was crazy thing to say. How crazy is our voice? That's a crazy ass thing to say. I wanted to be. Jeffrey Epstein?
Speaker: and
Speaker: Yes, dude. That is so fucking funny. Why are we talking about this guy right now?
Speaker: God. So so the funniest thing that happened with the story, at least i mean, I was away. i was off grid for the weekend, so I don't know what else happened, but.
Speaker: what i What I do think or what I do know happened was so Trump was in Scotland or something or the UK doing fucking crazy, stupid Trump things in the UK. Fuck yeah.
Speaker: Making the prime minister Keir Starmer go to his golf course instead of meeting him at Buckingham Palace, which is actually a fucking hilarious power move.
Speaker: But... ah but themer But what I realized is the American press are fucking pussies. Yes. Because they'll be like press conferences here where like ah NBC or or whatever, they'll be like, um Mr. Trump, people are saying, not me, but like people are saying that like are wondering, like, why did you say that the Epstein files, ah that you were going to release them, you know, six months ago, if if now you're saying that they're a hoax? Like, I don't know why they're asking that question, but, like, I'm i'm just, like, telling you what they said.
Speaker: And then Trump gets to just give a whole speech about how, like, Obama's a criminal and this is a conspiracy and a hoax and, like, he just gets to go off on all that. Meanwhile, in fucking Scotland, Trump's on his golf course and he's just like riding his golf cart around and the and the press is like on the outskirts of the golf course just being like, yeah, bruv, is it true you're a pedophile? Just yelling across the golf course at him like, hey, what the fuck were you doing on that island, you pedophile?
Speaker: and And, oh my god, there's a scene where, or there's a not a scene, there's like a thing that actually happened where he's like in his convoy of little golf carts and the press is just yelling that that kind of question at him. Oh my god. And they play ah they play like the soundtrack to Cats.
Speaker: They just start playing music so loud that to like drown out the sound of people yelling. No way. Yes. no No reporters in America have the balls to just...
Speaker: go to go to Mar-a-Lago and start shouting Trump's asking Trump why he's a pedophile. I love it. It's just yelling back, just trying to get, he's like, I was not invited to the island. Thank you very much. I was not, I did not receive the privilege of an invite.
Speaker: Thank you. It's a sore subject. Thank you for bringing it up. I really actually wish I could have went there guys. Are you still talking about Jeffrey Epstein?
Speaker: He's like, man, Jeff, I wish you were here right now, man. You would get these guys. It's so insane. Jeff, you wouldn't you would... you These guys wouldn't even know what was coming if you were here. He's looking up at the sky. We'd fucking own the libs, dude. Yeah.
Speaker: Oh, Mike, that's like actually the other crazy thing. Because you know if... if If none of this had happened, like if the story hadn't broken and everything back in Trump's first term, Jeffrey Epstein would be like the Secretary of Commerce.
Speaker: Are you still talking about Jeffrey Epstein? That's so fucking funny, dude. Come on now.
Speaker: That's so good.
Speaker: You guys are sickos. Here's another great one. You ought to be speaking about Bill Clinton who went to the island 28 times. I never went to the island. Yes. Like, bro, you were on the plane.
Speaker: Plus, like, yeah, I mean, they should be talking about Bill Clinton. I mean, that's why they that's why people want them to release the files. Yeah. that the There's an insane notion, and it's not just with him. It's also like the super far-right people who are just absolutely brainwashed.
Speaker: Who are like, whoa, Clinton's on that too. And I'm like, good. good i am He should also get the electric chair. I'm absolutely fine with firing him out of a cannon into the sun.
Speaker: and and And literally anyone else on that list. There's no celebrity, no politician, head of state. You know what I mean? We went through this like two episodes ago. Yeah, dude.
Speaker: it's I wasn't there for it, but yeah. I think that they should just let them all i'll be killed. um Yeah, he like called out the former president of Harvard too. he's like He was like, was on the plane, not me. Oh my God.
Speaker: My lawyers were on the plane.
Speaker: all All my lawyers were on the plane.
Speaker: Jesus Christ. Are we still talking about Derek Chauvin? a Guy was a stand-up police officer.
Speaker: Well, sometimes he kneeled, I heard. would have kneeled all over that that CTE shooter.
Speaker: He would have taken him taking that CTE shooter to the ground and kneeled right on him.
Speaker: I mean, not wrong, man. If only there was a good guy with a gun there. True. It's because it's New York. We're all liberal. health case New York.
Speaker: Yeah. That guy walked in with AR-15. Even the and NYPD officer that was there was probably like, yo, what up? ah Just got shot right in the fucking head.
Speaker: Oh, shit! They all just thought he was doing Call of Duty cosplay. You know what's crazy? is like When the cops need to step up and fire, they never do. But when they don't, they fire.
Speaker: It is... ah Yeah. is that Am I wrong? I mean, Uvalde? Yes, exactly. Bring back any memories? Absolutely insane. and saying Just stop in the hallway and listen to kids die.
Speaker: He had earmuffs on from Big Daddy over his ears so he couldn't hear anything. Damn, that's fucking like, all these things are crazy. Or from old school, sorry.
Speaker: Man, if my kid got killed in that Uvaldi thing, i would literally go to kill all of those cops. I would have went to the 34th floor and fucking shot myself the world. Right, exactly. but I would have just showed up at the police station, tried to kill as many of them as I possibly could. oh yeah, dude. I'd be screaming crazy stuff.
Speaker: um I have CTE! I have CTE! Ah!
Speaker: and That's just stupid, stupid, stupid. Does that have a gun to my fucking head? Well, it's kind of crazy, too, because I feel like I remember the Invaldi thing. They were like, well, we don't it's not you know, we don't have to protect if it's going to put our life in danger. What the fuck is even the point?
Speaker: ah Sir, this is a Capital One cafe. Not the Uvalde Police Department? but Oh no, I went in the building next door. Yeah.
Speaker: Oh, sorry. Sorry, guys. Have a good day. CTE. What if he did, like I said, he went in there and like, oh, wrong floor. Do you know how to... Is the NFL two up?
Speaker: One, two down? Yeah, you're not going to be able to call security for a couple reasons. Just let me know what floor.
Speaker: What do you do in a situation, though? If there is a guy like that, he's like, you fucking tell me what floor they're on, or I'm going to fucking shoot you in the head. I would just tell him. Yeah. thirty mean yeah
Speaker: You're not giving any more information than it is available on a directory. i love... I fucking love Liverpool. I fucking stupid fucking football.
Speaker: ah It's two two floors up and the door code is 1111.
Speaker: I watched the guy on the cameras, alright? I'll tell you what the door code is. Holy shit.
Speaker: He just goes up there and hits him with like the ah Mrs. Doubtfire to get him to open the door. He's like, hello. They're like, what the fuck is that? Yeah.
Speaker: You can't be scared. It's an anime black guy out here. We're fine, guys. He must be working for IT or something. Yeah, dude. That guy's like god all right.
Speaker: I wonder how he missed the directory so badly. How do you fuck that part up?
Speaker: That's why all that I think it's a conspiracy, dude. True. I mean, it's just you you just... All you had to do was go there a day earlier.
Speaker: I mean, what kind of like you know what kind of killstreaks and wins did he get to get that skin on the AR-15, too? i Actually, yeah.
Speaker: He's got the tan digital skin on it. Yeah. Holy shit. Where the fuck do you get that? that the tan camo digi skin?
Speaker: You know why the 33 thing is so... It's because it has to do with Freemasonry. Jesus Christ. Yeah, I cant ah can't go deep into that one. There's too much, but... Those are just old guys that are just like trying to... It's just an Elks Lodge, basically, that people are blowing out of proportion.
Speaker: Yes. Relax, guys. They're all in there doing gay shit, too. You know that. Yeah, it's just all old guy shit. not even like gay shit, but like, they're like, Oh, so like You can know the secrets of Freemasonry. You have to like take a picture while I'm touching your butthole.
Speaker: Oh my god. Some fucking blackmail shit like that. i love that. It was like, yeah, they're probably doing gay shit. and they're like, we're doing bingo for Donna's cancer treatment tonight. We're going to try to raise $180 for cancer treatment to save her life.
Speaker: Yeah, literally. the one the one in my The Masonic Hall in my town just does blood drives. That's like all... they that seemingly all they do they're definitely doing that episode of south park where cartman puts his wiener in butter's mouth and then calls butter's gay
Speaker: oh my god now that we've taken this picture everyone will think you're gay
Speaker: You like it more than b
Speaker: me. Oh, You are now a Freemason.
Speaker: And the secret is there is no secret. love that they're like, this guy at CTE, he could surely figure out the crazy plot of all of the Blackstone acquiring realty and the masonary Freemason 33.
Speaker: Like, this guy was absolutely retarded.
Speaker: Yeah, dude. He couldn't even get at the right floor. Yeah, he couldn't even connect any dots. it is And it his manifesto was just like six words on a receipt. It's like, check my fucking head.
Speaker: like the cri like Like, study my brain. so He shot himself. Jesus Christ. like Like, the message study my brain as if Like we don't, like science doesn't understand what CTE is.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. like Like best case scenario they do in an autopsy and they're like, yep, he had CTE. That's a shame. Ever heard of Aaron Hernandez, buddy?
Speaker: Yeah. Fucking guy rock. Guy fucking ruled, dude. Fucking sick at playing football, dude. Yeah, that guy fucking was awesome, dude. Junior Seau, both of those guys killed killed themselves without, or Junior Seau like shot himself in the chest.
Speaker: And they both were like, yeah, they had the they had the brain of a nine-year-old goat. They're they're fine Aaron Hernandez, though, you know, he was on the 33rd floor, too, if you know what I mean.
Speaker: No, he was not. He was at the Masonic Hall, if you catch my drift. How dare you. Don't say that about Aaron Hernandez.
Speaker: His allegations were not true. I heard in jail, I heard they were they called him they called him straight Aaron, straight as an arrow. Oh, why are we still talking about Epstein?
Speaker: ha That's me right now. Why are we still talking about Aaron Hernandez? Who brought him up? What the heck are we even talking about? I didn't even have the privilege to go to his house one night.
Speaker: What are we fucking talking about? What the heck are we talking about? I didn't fucking run into him at a Providence nightclub. What are we fucking even talking about, guys?
Speaker: Oh, man. Aaron Hernandez's brother, though. Fun fact, he also tried to do us ah one of these shootings from TCT, but they like busted him the day before.
Speaker: Oh, that's awesome. Once again, they're like, this retard couldn't even fucking do it. This retard drew everything on his Facebook post. We knew it was coming.
Speaker: So, I mean, at the end of the day, what our conclusion is, no one could ever come close to Luigi Mangione's attack. That dude was fucking calculated. Yes. That guy fucking, he's a Tom Brady of that shit. He didn't hurt anybody.
Speaker: I mean, you know, nobody deserves to get shot in the back in front of your hotel at six in the morning. But he he had an objective and he completed the objective.
Speaker: True. Pretty flawlessly. Yes. To where everyone thought he was like a cartel hitman. Yeah, we won't know until the documentary comes out at some point why he just chose to hang out in Altoona waiting to be caught.
Speaker: But other than that, flawless plan. He's like, i I studied the town Altoona and, you know, I realized everybody from the state of Pennsylvania is fucking retarded. So I never thought they would be able to catch me.
Speaker: I thought I wouldn't even have to dye my hair. I would just be able to hang out there for the rest of my life.
Speaker: Oh, man. I heard ah Jake Paul and is going to host a fight of Brian Koberger versus Luigi Mangione in the next ah two years on Netflix.
Speaker: and Brian Koberger staring at him while he's just fucking in the octagon versus him.
Speaker: I mean, I...
Speaker: You think he got to Altoona and he was like, man, if only I could work at this one grow here. hu he planned on blending in.
Speaker: He's like, i could I could fit right in here. I could be the the manager, cultivation manager. i could run this Sheetz gas station.
Speaker: i could I could run the Slurpee machine here. Like Pennsylvania sucked on the whole, but Altoona was like fucking insane. Yeah. Fucking the worst.
Speaker: I guarantee you they saw Luigi Mangione there and like they didn't even call the cops. That's why she didn't get the reward money. It's so it's so like white and retarded there. They're like, there's a black guy that came into McDonald's here.
Speaker: Because they've never seen actually seen a black guy. Somewhat ah somewhat olive skin. Yeah, I've never seen an Italian person. Yeah, exactly. There's a black guy that came into the McDonald's here. We need a backup here immediately.
Speaker: He ordered the hash brown and asked if there was any pork in it. there We got to come arrest him.
Speaker: Isn't that the man from the pictures?
Speaker: they that place Is this the Freemason Lodge 482? four eighty two I'm trying to see what's going down in here.
Speaker: I'm trying to get about $9,800 in this Freemason Lodge. Let's see what's going on in here, y'all. That's ah that's a urban influencer walking into a Freemason Lodge.
Speaker: What's up, fa We're here at the Masonic Lodge. I hear there's a lot of blood in here
Speaker: We're doing a fundraiser for $32 today at the Masonic Lodge.
Speaker: Let's get it cracking, y'all. What's up, y'all?
Speaker: What's up, y'all? I'm here on the 33rd floor. We're going to see what's going on today at Blackstone Grills. Oh, my God. um
Speaker: We're here at the Masonic Lodge.
Speaker: ah i I think we're going to sell 33 butter chicken at the Masonic Lodge on the 33rd floor. Oh, my God. It's that guy walking at the end of the YouTube video. It's them still doing the vlog, and they're doing exactly what we said, where it's like like when you're on the phone with somebody, and they're talking to somebody that's in front of them, and they're like, no, yeah.
Speaker: 36. No, 36. You're too, you're too, you're too down from it. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
Speaker: Hearing that on the, what was, what was that? oh that was just a guy with AR 15 with a digi camo.
Speaker: That was, that was Lionel Richie, AKA guy, Richie with an AR 15 with a digi camo.
Speaker: I mean, I'm just going back to the fact that he walked down the middle of the street with a gun. Yeah, exactly. I mean, that's fucking crazy. That's crazy that even in most one of the most populated places in the world, you can get killed at work because no one wanted to say anything about the guy who was walking down the street with a fucking gun.
Speaker: More like woke tribe. am I right? That's right. Whoa, is that guy have AR-15 walking down? Now, why would you just assume that guy has an AR-15? Any reason?
Speaker: That's racist. You're racist. and I'm not even going to look over there, even though I'm an armed police officer. I can't believe you would even say something like that.
Speaker: now Now, why would you ever say that that man has AR-15 and he's walking into the NFL? The NFL offices are there. There's nothing that could happen wrong.
Speaker: I mean, it just seems, you know. i mean, pretty dark, but there was definitely somebody on the other end of like a team's meeting that was like, where is Jennifer?
Speaker: She's late again. Jesus Christ. choice Yeah, most definitely. She's fucking always late. She's supposed to be presenting this deck and she's not even here today. What is wrong with her?
Speaker: so it' yeah
Speaker: oh my God.
Speaker: A different saga of that. Uh, is it?
Speaker: Has anyone ah heard from from Jennifer? We were supposed to have a two o'clock and and ah she just ghosted me. Like, I don't know. ah It's just a different... Yeah, she's dead.
Speaker: Yeah. Oh, my God. That's so funny.
Speaker: Where is Jamal's Charles? We were supposed to have a touch base at 3 And Jamal hasn't even showed up. I think he's a little late. Then there's a different guy in the teams. Now, why would you assume he's always late?
Speaker: Oh, man, guys, this is all parody. You know what I mean? It's just... We're just going through jokes. Just just jokes. Everyone feels terrible. you know and We're not picturing the dead person on the ground with the stupid team's incoming call um going off on their phone the whole time while they're dead and they're in their pool of blood.
Speaker: used to talk about Jeffrey Epstein. so um
Speaker: jeffreyp Jennifer, our touch base is on.
Speaker: yeah Now, this is one thing you're going to have to work on on our next. yeah You've just got the HR person taking notes.
Speaker: Oh, my God.
Speaker: I bet they wish they were the... the grill company because I bet those ah those flat tops work like you could that could be like a fucking bulletproof shield shield. Yeah, like a
Speaker: full chest shield.
Speaker: yeah
Speaker: Hello, it's Jared from the future. Zencastr went offline while we were recording and is still down 12 hours later. I know this is the man trying to keep us quiet.
Speaker: They want to stop us and to stop you from hearing us, but they will fail. We are unstoppable. We love you and if you were on the 33rd floor, we'd take a bullet for you. See you next week.
Speaker: Goodbye.
