Transcript
whitekanyewest: Your loser-ass Jedi mind tricks just don't work on me, dude. already know. Wow.
Faggot Guy: Hey, we're here for episode 80.
whitekanyewest: That might be the best Mr. Nasty clip of all.
Faggot Guy: Mr. Nasty is the truth. He's speaking everything of what we think.
whitekanyewest: Mr.
Faggot Guy: but
whitekanyewest: Nasty's just out here throwing around fucking racial slurs.
Faggot Guy: He's not racist.
Chef Mike: Hard Ks.
Faggot Guy: He's not racist.
Chef Mike: you don't You don't hear a hard K that often.
whitekanyewest: Ugh.
Faggot Guy: he was say He was proving his point that he's not racist.
whitekanyewest: Yeah, by saying, by using all these racial slurs, he's proving that he's not racist.
Chef Mike: Yeah, i feel like, yeah. Yeah.
Chef Mike: yeah
Faggot Guy: dude he a racist guy doesn't say doesn't speak on that matter mr nasty's not racist dude you see what he had for today
Chef Mike: No. What do you have for what?
Faggot Guy: i gotta i gotta get this episode 80 uh dudes are us this is our new instagram pet mr nasty m-i-s-t-e-a-n-a-s-s-t-y
Chef Mike: Probably.
Faggot Guy: on instagram double s and he uh is a wild dude he uh
Chef Mike: Double S. Nass.
whitekanyewest: Nah, we don't have to whole thing. That's enough right there.
Chef Mike: Oh God.
whitekanyewest: like i said the word bag too
Chef Mike: I don't know.
Faggot Guy: yeah
whitekanyewest: no one said the guy
Faggot Guy: Keep it going.
whitekanyewest: now we don't have to run the whole thing that's that's not free
Chef Mike: Oh,
Faggot Guy: he he makes shrimp scampi and he is not racist. And...
Chef Mike: ah sure. I was going to, I was going to guess he had like a you know, like a mini tray of lasagna. Yeah.
Faggot Guy: Here's a picture. This is the post. It says, damn, it's a picture of definitely not what it what he's saying it is, but I don't know. Maybe it is. I don't know what the hell. It looks like a like a plastic brass knuckle and like ah just an O-ring of any sorts.
Chef Mike: ah
Faggot Guy: And he said, damn, I brought an egg to work and put it in some ramen noodles and it cracked inside my bag. Luckily, not all the way cracked open, but some egg got on my cock ring and stun gun.
Faggot Guy: Emoji, cherry emoji, eggplant emoji. Ring emoji, lightning emoji, squirt gun emoji. I'm pretty sure this is going to be the first time someone at work went to the sink to wash a cock ring and a stun gun. If someone's washed one of those, then I guarantee they've never washed this combo.
Faggot Guy: Let's go.
Chef Mike: Jesus Christ.
Faggot Guy: And it's just those two items on his desk in his cubicle.
Chef Mike: Oh, okay. Uh...
Faggot Guy: First comment. Can you explain what a cock ring does and what it's for?
Chef Mike: ah
Faggot Guy: when that happens.
Faggot Guy: But he keeps it real. He brought his favorite lunch. He should put a video of how to prepare it. It's cut open cucumbers with tuna, mayo, and sriracha inside of them with avocado, and he brings them to work.
Faggot Guy: Under that it says Boner Petit.
Chef Mike: Hell yeah.
Faggot Guy: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Chef Mike: Jesus Christ. All right. This guy is worth following.
Chef Mike: I'm just now seeing the fucking George Floyd.
Faggot Guy: Yeah. It's such a good post.
whitekanyewest: Oh, man. Mm-hmm.
Chef Mike: Yeah. fifth anniversary cake.
whitekanyewest: oh
Faggot Guy: It's an AI image of George Floyd holding a birthday cake with a five on it and says, this year makes five years of sobriety for George. Oh, my God. he I got to give it to him.
Faggot Guy: That's pretty funny.
Chef Mike: Oh, and then that's the one where somebody said, how long has it been since you've been able to see your kids for longer than a week?
Faggot Guy: God damn.
whitekanyewest: and hello
Faggot Guy: God damn.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, he's going to be on the podcast next week.
Chef Mike: You washed your cock ring in the work sink the other day. no one cares about your opinion on the judicial system, brother.
Faggot Guy: Yes.
Chef Mike: That was from ah somebody by the handle of toxic bitch Al.
whitekanyewest: Let's
whitekanyewest: do it rolls.
whitekanyewest: it's a huge s news story right
whitekanyewest: the student rolls
Faggot Guy: He definitely works at an MLM or something.
Chef Mike: not a Not afraid to just drop a strong Kike Hernandez on Instagram.
whitekanyewest: to turn
Faggot Guy: Yes.
Chef Mike: So good for him.
Faggot Guy: True.
Faggot Guy: He speaks his mind. He drives a Tesla. He has weights under his desk.
Chef Mike: Crazy outfits.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, he rocks the... He does the the double ah rock and roll thumb out sign all the time.
whitekanyewest: right away. I'm looking locked for reason.
Faggot Guy: What a psycho dude to be working with.
Chef Mike: All right.
whitekanyewest: i a
Faggot Guy: Yes!
Chef Mike: ah
Faggot Guy: Yes!
Chef Mike: Oh no. We're never getting monetized.
whitekanyewest: I was just about to say I were demonetized now.
Chef Mike: It's fine.
Faggot Guy: all sorts of fatal
Chef Mike: fine
Faggot Guy: motions to keep up with your ass i was like went to bed early, and I woke up early. Thinking about some weird shit, dude. Like people in my life, you know? Girls and stuff.
Faggot Guy: You ever been inside a woman just one time where she has a pretty face, she got big boobs, a wet pussy?
Chef Mike: Oh oh my God.
Faggot Guy: I didn't even know that's what that was going to be.
Faggot Guy: He's just off the radar. guys want to see a pussy Oh god.
Faggot Guy: This dude rules. Happy Monday motherfuckers. don't know what you think but this Knicks vs Celtics game is looking kinda juicy man. Everything else hit. All we need now is Jalen Brunson and Jason Tatum both get two assists each.
Faggot Guy: And someone's... Yeah, we're going to shoot him in his fucking head if he talks about the Celtics again. Everything else is cool.
Chef Mike: Oh my God.
whitekanyewest: laughter
Chef Mike: ah
Faggot Guy: Everything else is totally fine.
Faggot Guy: Oh, my fucking God. That son of a bitch.
Faggot Guy: God damn, that dude rocks.
Faggot Guy: Whew. Everyone got to go follow him. He's blown up in the past, like, fucking two months, obviously.
Chef Mike: I was going say 16 something K followers. It's a later discovery than we usually have.
whitekanyewest: Vandy. Oh, man. This dude cracked.
Faggot Guy: construction, man. Where is
whitekanyewest: race only
whitekanyewest: i said it before i love a racist joke man this du is correct
Faggot Guy: it?
Chef Mike: There's only one race for me, the human race.
Faggot Guy: I said a goddamn thing about you know who had a problem with it
Faggot Guy: the fag too. And one said a goddamn thing about it.
Chef Mike: I mean, we can agree sure that...
Faggot Guy: You know who had
Chef Mike: I think all races can agree white people are the worst.
Faggot Guy: a problem with Fucking white people. Jared.
whitekanyewest: No,
Faggot Guy: Oh Him work just saying fag. Fucking white people have a problem with this.
Chef Mike: Hmm.
Faggot Guy: What do you think he has?
Chef Mike: White people.
Faggot Guy: a definitely Definitely not his favorite month of the year right now, for sure.
whitekanyewest: definitely not.
Faggot Guy: damn.
Chef Mike: Oh, yeah. I saw... Oh, that was like a
Faggot Guy: god
Chef Mike: Fucking ah just what Twitter has become. Not that it was ever anything great to begin with, but anytime I like i log on for a second and there was one today that was just that was June is now officially veterans appreciation month.
whitekanyewest: Oh yeah, I saw that.
Chef Mike: Like with some stupid, you know, AI fucking people saluting a flag or something. It was like goodbye pride. It's like one, it can be two things.
Chef Mike: If you want to make that a thing, you can do that. I think like September is like Latino heritage month and like I can.
whitekanyewest: Ass cancer.
Chef Mike: Yeah. Like rectal cancer awareness month. They all have multiple things. ah But yeah. Makes people really angry in a kind of a funny way.
Faggot Guy: God damn it, dude. Him just eating fucking crazy tuna, avocado, cucumber, and dropping fag, and...
Faggot Guy: And
Chef Mike: The thing about Israel and Palestine is these fucking
whitekanyewest: all
Faggot Guy: He's saying this while he's washing his cock ring in the sink to you.
Chef Mike: builders.
Chef Mike: Hold up. My shrimp scampi is ready in the microwave.
whitekanyewest: right as the only white person on this podcast group I'm offended that you guys would say white people are the worst um no dude that's my culture yeah
Faggot Guy: That's true.
Chef Mike: No, but you can agree.
Faggot Guy: Paul is the most powerful.
Chef Mike: Yeah, that's what you... That's like the exchange for having all the like political power and money and living in the best neighborhoods is like...
Faggot Guy: Yes.
Chef Mike: you is like White people can't be cool. You steal everything that makes you cool. You steal from black people.
whitekanyewest: Damn.
Chef Mike: Right? Am I wrong?
Faggot Guy: True, true.
Chef Mike: That's fine. like I think that's like... Dodd was divvying things up and... in, you know, when he was creating all the races and he was like, those ones will be smart.
whitekanyewest: to
Chef Mike: Those ones will be cool. i don't know what he did for Indians pass hard pass on that.
Faggot Guy: hey Yeah. Yeah.
whitekanyewest: Butter chicken.
Chef Mike: But white people who's like, he's like, Oh, they didn't get to be tall or smart. Or so I guess we got to give them like, you know,
whitekanyewest: Giant cocks? Nah, that's not true either.
Chef Mike: all the, all the power, all, you know, all the political and and social power.
whitekanyewest: okay
Chef Mike: And that's a, that seems fair.
Faggot Guy: Damn, God did Indians so dirty. Those ones will be really horny but creepy.
Faggot Guy: Smart but but still very creepy. Very ah autistic off the bat no matter what.
Chef Mike: I would believe if I were told that like, I don't know, Asians think white people smell bad and I just can't smell it. But ah yeah, gave them like the most lingering food.
Faggot Guy: True.
Chef Mike: Just the most. You know, when Indian food's been around kind of food.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, they just think in general.
Chef Mike: And then just, ah so I was dancing around it, but you got there. And then we're like, hey, let's cram like a billion and a half of them in a country that's smaller than the United States.
Faggot Guy: Yes.
Chef Mike: And don't give anyone shoes.
Faggot Guy: Yes. And they're all autistic no matter what. like They like started autism probably. Because they're either working like 200 hours a week or they're like the Indian guy that's like like he's like drooling and just staring into space.
Faggot Guy: There's no in-between.
Chef Mike: Alright, well this went a different direction than I was that i intended to when I was saying white people are terrible, but not a bad direction.
Faggot Guy: and then, yeah.
Faggot Guy: black people smell Black people smell like apple cinnamon Yankee candle. That's a fact. they have that They have that skill added to them.
Chef Mike: Yeah, that's a...
Faggot Guy: wait White people stink. Black people smell good. Chinese people just are neutral. Smell like ice, probably. That's really it.
Chef Mike: Yeah, they're fine. Sometimes like fish, but like...
Faggot Guy: Yeah. That's...
Chef Mike: often Often because they have like some weird sea creature with them.
Faggot Guy: Yeah. So, yeah, that's i guess whites are though the dominant.
Faggot Guy: I don't know we got here, but, yeah, this is is where we got to. Thanks a lot, Mr. Nasty.
Faggot Guy: So, yep, that's true.
Chef Mike: But yeah, I mean, the only race I care about is a human race.
Faggot Guy: There you go. George Floyd, five years sober. Congratulations. Ha, ha, ha.
whitekanyewest: one who just goes against everything you say.
Chef Mike: I'm proud of you.
whitekanyewest: Like, I
Faggot Guy: You did it. Yes! Oh, you can't stop going back to the well.
whitekanyewest: What up, Nasty Army? Man, I didn't really like the best today. Plus, I took a nap. Nasty Army. Hell yeah.
Faggot Guy: Hell yes.
whitekanyewest: Reporting for duty, sir. Nasty Army.
whitekanyewest: Damn, he has a bejeweled steering wheel too. That's crazy.
Faggot Guy: Yes, he does.
Chef Mike: That's insane.
whitekanyewest: That's fucking crazy.
Faggot Guy: yeah that's his Tesla bejeweled steering wheel. He has a weight on it.
whitekanyewest: Yeah, that's kind of crazy that he is posting a picture of a cock ring and saying he cleaned it in the bathroom at work and then the next post is like him running around with his little kids.
Faggot Guy: No, my God, I know, dude, he's he's fucking completely schizophrenic.
Chef Mike: Ha ha ha ha ha.
Faggot Guy: He's out of his fucking mind.
whitekanyewest: Yeah, this is my my my cock ring. have a really hard time maintaining a hard erection. so I put this rubber band around my fucking dick and balls to hold all the blood in there.
Faggot Guy: yeah He goes on in depth.
whitekanyewest: Next post. This is my kid. I love my kid.
Faggot Guy: and They mean the world to me. No one can get in between my kids.
whitekanyewest: one gets in between my cock ring and me, except for my kid.
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Chef Mike: Oh my God.
Faggot Guy: So what if I'm hard as a rock with my kids?
Chef Mike: Yeah. I was going to say, if you wear it to work, if you wear it to work, you're of the, you're a person who's of the mindset that like it could, it could happen at any moment. And I need to be ready. Like the girl, the the girl in the cubicle across who's, who hates my guts could give me a look and it's on.
Faggot Guy: Yes. Yes.
Chef Mike: So I need to be ready. That dude wears that everywhere.
Faggot Guy: ah Yeah, dude.
Chef Mike: That dude wears that to church.
Faggot Guy: there's There's no way that you ever, like, you someone definitely heard him be like, oh, no. And then they had no idea that's what he was referencing.
whitekanyewest: Oh man, I got egg on my cock ring again.
Faggot Guy: God damn it.
whitekanyewest: damn it.
Chef Mike: ah
whitekanyewest: My stun gun's all gummed up with cum.
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Faggot Guy: Dude, and then he's,
whitekanyewest: Like what a weird combo too, cock ring. You think he stuns himself in the balls?
Faggot Guy: Oh, yeah, dude. You see his room is like purple.
Faggot Guy: I don't know how I, my algorithm blessed me with him, but that was the first video I saw was him just like going ah getting out of work, going to the casino with like a water bottle full of vodka.
whitekanyewest: Yeah, i don't know. don't understand what's going on with that.
Chef Mike: Hell yeah.
Faggot Guy: And he's there every night.
Chef Mike: Mm-hmm.
Faggot Guy: He's at the casino every night. I'm like, dude, he looks exactly like the guys that go every single night. So it makes sense.
Chef Mike: hey
Faggot Guy: But I'm proud of him. He's doing what he loves.
Faggot Guy: There's nothing you can do about it.
whitekanyewest: Water modern bottle full of vodka is the oldest trick in the book, dude.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, I do this, you know, for me and my friends to meet up with. I'm like, no way, dude. No, you don't.
whitekanyewest: We all meet up in the bathroom and sanitize our cock rings with this bottle of vodka.
Faggot Guy: This is totally not for me. This is for me and all my... He's a Costco guy, too, so he gets the Kirkland vodka.
whitekanyewest: up with cousin Angelo?
Chef Mike: Is he alive still?
whitekanyewest: Hasn't said he'd kill himself yet.
Chef Mike: I'm sure he's overdosed on Fent.
Faggot Guy: You got to hear Cousin Angelo talk about you know his take on on racism.
whitekanyewest: Oh yeah.
Chef Mike: Oh, Mike. When he posted or came up just like came up for air and he had dyed his hair like the Italian flag, that's a cry for help.
Faggot Guy: No way. Oh, yeah, he's cooked.
whitekanyewest: Yep. so
Chef Mike: That was like maybe a month ago. hasn't... He hasn't... has't gotten better since that and ah the fucking Costco guys like recorded and another like a their summer version of the song that included but an additional additional cast member additional fake family like they had they had the Rizzlers dad do a verse and they had like I'm uncle Jamba Juice
Faggot Guy: Okay. No cousin Angelo.
Faggot Guy: Oh, no.
Chef Mike: Uh, but no, they did not bring back cousin Angelo for a verse. So.
Faggot Guy: Paul's sneaking chips over there on my... Everyone can't tell, but he's sneaking them.
whitekanyewest: Nah, it's mini Oreos.
Faggot Guy: Yes! Yes! Yes! yes
whitekanyewest: oh
Faggot Guy: yeah
Faggot Guy: yeah
Chef Mike: Are there many like the tiny Oreos or the, or like thin Oreos?
whitekanyewest: No, it's a snack sack Oreo mini.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, dude.
Chef Mike: um
Faggot Guy: Get him going. He's got to fuel up. Paul was sleeping before we woke him up to record this.
whitekanyewest: was definitely asleep.
Faggot Guy: I'm not asleep.
Faggot Guy: Oh, man.
Chef Mike: You're asleep.
Faggot Guy: You're fucking...
whitekanyewest: Oh, I was asleep.
Faggot Guy: Four in
whitekanyewest: I've been up since four.
Chef Mike: ah Tell us about ah what's going on on the um the what's going on in the um green this week.
Faggot Guy: Four in the morning?
whitekanyewest: ah fucking work, dude. I'm fucking union. Nothing.
Chef Mike: Turtles? You found a turtle?
whitekanyewest: Spray them. Oh, actually whole family of ducks. We had to rescue all the ducks today. They got up into the shop.
Chef Mike: they were Into the shop?
whitekanyewest: who And then like the, the young kids for whatever reason, chase the mom out. So then the babies were just running around.
Faggot Guy: What the fuck?
Chef Mike: Kids are assholes. Leave, leave ducks alone.
Faggot Guy: Leave him alone. Let him be.
whitekanyewest: There was like a mom and 10 babies in the bathroom. And then instead of just, like, leaving the doors open, they just tried to chase him out.
Chef Mike: There's a, uh, there's a, there's a goose family near my apartment. There's like a pond between where I live in Costco and there's a goose or a couple of geese and they had two babies, goslings.
Chef Mike: And see them walking around with their fucking two goslings.
whitekanyewest: Mm-hmm.
Faggot Guy: Thank you.
Chef Mike: See them in the parking lot and shit. And then randomly. Like literally one day I was like leaving my apartment and saw them walking around with their two babies. And then an hour later, two hours later, come back and they only have one.
Chef Mike: And since then, I've only seen them with one. It's been like two weeks. Like, what the fuck happened?
whitekanyewest: something ate it for sure.
Chef Mike: Who the fuck did? And it was broad daylight. It's not like some, like, fox snuck out. And they're, it's unfortunate because they, like, live in a Costco parking lot. So it's not the safest environment for, to raise chicks.
Faggot Guy: You
Chef Mike: But I think about, I'm like, what the fuck? If some asshole who was, like, driving, like, I don't know. yeah Anyway, don't have anything else to add to that other than don't fucking don't fuck with birds.
Faggot Guy: yes
whitekanyewest: Peep that picture of me holding the baby duck.
whitekanyewest: Back on my bullshit, picking up wild animals, you know, picking up birds.
Chef Mike: Hell yeah. Saw two snakes today.
whitekanyewest: Pick them up.
Chef Mike: No, they were like one of them was like in poison ivy. I feel like fucking with that.
whitekanyewest: Hmm.
Chef Mike: Oh, yeah.
Faggot Guy: Oh yeah, what's his name?
Chef Mike: I knew you were go there.
Faggot Guy: What's his name?
whitekanyewest: Hmm.
whitekanyewest: Hmm.
Faggot Guy: I found two snakes. I stroked two snakes today. What's his name?
whitekanyewest: I
Faggot Guy: I sucked two snakes today. i mean, I found two in the poison ivy.
Chef Mike: I mean, ah stroke to Cox snakes, snakes.
whitekanyewest: put the snake ring on him
Faggot Guy: Yeah. Put the zikering right on it.
Chef Mike: ah
Faggot Guy: That's awesome.
Faggot Guy: Oh, man. You never know. you You might need it to fuck a duck at work that comes into the bathroom. Yeah.
Faggot Guy: yeah you get the You got the ring on. The mama duck comes in the bathroom. rag What the hell? What you what are you doing? What the hell's going on here in here? Trying to try to come on to me?
Chef Mike: this isn't This isn't the right podcast for this, but but like if we're going to talk about ducks specifically, ah ah female ducks have decoy vaginas because male ducks are like prolifically...
Faggot Guy: Okay.
whitekanyewest: Do be raping.
Chef Mike: Yeah, they are like known to be the most prolific rapists in the animal kingdom. And they have like 18 inch corkscrew shaped dicks. And so if the female duck is like, i don't like this one, I don't want to have this one's babies.
Chef Mike: She can like move a trap door inside to like lead him into a decoy vagina.
Faggot Guy: Hey,
Chef Mike: Like I said, not the right, that's maybe for like a nature podcast, but, uh, I couldn't not when you could not spit some bird facts when you started talking about,
Chef Mike: Mr. Nasty fucking a duck in the bathroom.
Faggot Guy: and we all been there, brother.
Chef Mike: it They'd be used to it, honestly. Like.
Faggot Guy: Oh, yeah, they're good with that. That's what that's for.
Chef Mike: Well, ducks.
Faggot Guy: Guys with
Chef Mike: Like it's part of their, you know.
Faggot Guy: Guys with air gel and bedazzled Tesla wheels.
Chef Mike: Part of their culture.
Faggot Guy: That's exactly what what it's for.
Faggot Guy: oh man.
Faggot Guy: Can't get better than ah last episode of of making fun Indian people for 45 minutes.
Chef Mike: Could that be our entire shtick?
Faggot Guy: Definitely, 100%.
Chef Mike: Is that, is there, like, I know there's enough. I know there's an, like, we would, that would never get boring to us. Would, is that enough to, like, build a, ah an entire podcast?
Chef Mike: Like, you know.
Faggot Guy: The Empire?
Chef Mike: Yeah.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, absolutely.
whitekanyewest: They still do kind of know in Pakistan.
Chef Mike: Oh, I don't know. i didn't even, that,
Faggot Guy: and love how no one in the world is paying attention to that.
whitekanyewest: All right.
Chef Mike: That was, yeah, when that when that first happened, i was I was a little bit invested, like, the day it happened, because they are both nuclear states. Or at least allegedly they're nuclear states.
Chef Mike: So you're like, okay, this is, like, kind of the first time two nuclear states have have directly conflicted with each other since the Cold War, or since World War Yeah.
Chef Mike: And then, yeah, you're right. About 48 hours later, i was like, all right, whatever.
Faggot Guy: What happened in World War II?
Chef Mike: I think we nuked Japan.
Faggot Guy: I'm just kidding.
Chef Mike: Unclear.
Faggot Guy: We know what happened. all all of our All of our grandfathers got severe PTSD and passed it down generations after that.
whitekanyewest: fighting each other. I said, why don't you let them fight? Why don't we get in the middle of it? I said, let them fight.
Faggot Guy: That's what happened in World War two
Chef Mike: Oh, I made it halfway through All's Quiet on the Western Front last night, Pubs.
whitekanyewest: and began of fighting bolt up it
whitekanyewest: You watched it?
Chef Mike: I watched half of it.
whitekanyewest: ah You gotta watch the whole thing. It's a one sitting kind of movie.
Chef Mike: I'm going to finish it. it was um ah It can't possibly be a one sitting kind of movie.
whitekanyewest: I watched it in one sitting. It's only like two hours and two and half hours.
Chef Mike: Two and a half hours.
whitekanyewest: Yeah.
Faggot Guy: That's only like eight bags of snack pack Oreos.
Chef Mike: i
whitekanyewest: Mm-hmm.
Chef Mike: ah I went into it expecting something different, which is
whitekanyewest: It's not nearly as depressing as I thought it was going to be.
Chef Mike: ah
Chef Mike: i don't and even know. i So i like I said, I watched 1917, which I wouldn't call like an action-packed movie. It definitely also was, you know, like so you see so definitely see some of the fucking shit of war, but then there's also some moments of like, of like I don't know.
Chef Mike: running through the French countryside, but this, uh, but I think that movie is 90 minutes long.
Faggot Guy: Okay.
Chef Mike: So like a very concise film, uh, all squad on the Western front.
Faggot Guy: Okay.
Chef Mike: I I've made it through, I think an hour and some change of it. Uh, it's a slow burn, not, not, not enjoying it, but it was like 1 AM m and I was like, do I really want to be up for another hour? i told myself no.
Faggot Guy: I've done that with movies plenty of times.
Chef Mike: it
whitekanyewest: think you've seen most of like the big kill scenes.
Chef Mike: Yeah. Well, okay. Other parts that I made a mistake doing. I started it in German with subtitles because it's originally German.
Faggot Guy: Yeah,
Chef Mike: And then I...
whitekanyewest: Oh yeah. You gotta watch the English dub.
Chef Mike: So then I got to the point where I was like, I can't keep reading. ah like i hate I actually hate subtitles. like I know some people watch Netflix with subtitles all the time. Respectfully, you're insane.
whitekanyewest: Yeah. i hate to hate them.
Faggot Guy: yeah that's gay.
Chef Mike: Uh, but I, but I tend to like original dubs because like the voice acting a little bit better. Like I, but anyway, it doesn't matter. Switch to English.
Faggot Guy: There you go.
Chef Mike: Uh, and that was better. And, but yeah, I think that switch over I got because the voices didn't match. i I was like, is that the same guys? And then there's a time. There's like an 18 month time jump.
Chef Mike: that the same guy from then? And I got confused. I probably need to start from the beginning. But anyway, it's good. It's just, it's a slow burn.
whitekanyewest: Hmm.
Faggot Guy: You know what else is a slow burn?
Chef Mike: I guess it was artsier than I expected.
whitekanyewest: Best...
Faggot Guy: This is a slow
whitekanyewest: You want me tell you the best scene in the movie?
Chef Mike: um might have seen it already.
whitekanyewest: Hmm...
Chef Mike: guess it's at the end. Well, don't tell me if it's good because I'm going watch it.
whitekanyewest: I don't know if you've seen it yet.
whitekanyewest: It's just one of the good kill scenes in it.
Chef Mike: Yeah, probably. i
Faggot Guy: When are you going to finish it?
Chef Mike: I think I got up. I think I'm sure I'm a little bit further, but the last thing I distinctly remember, spoiler alert, if you're listening and don't want it spoiled for you, fast forward 15 seconds or whatever.
Chef Mike: It's where the kids are they are like investigating the missing regimen, and they find that they all like accidentally got gassed in a house somewhere or whatever.
whitekanyewest: Yep, they all took their and gas masks off too soon.
Chef Mike: I think I kept watching another like 10 minutes after that, but that's the last thing I can be like, oh yeah, I remember that.
whitekanyewest: then you haven't seen it yet. I won't ruin it for you, yeah but it is a good scene.
Chef Mike: Anyway.
whitekanyewest: i want i want to ruin it for you, but I won't.
Chef Mike: ah
Faggot Guy: Do it. Do it. Hell yeah.
whitekanyewest: Hmm.
Faggot Guy: When are you going to finish it?
Chef Mike: Probably not tonight, maybe tomorrow night.
Faggot Guy: Nice.
whitekanyewest: All right, I'll ruin it for you. the The main character, Paul, and his homie, Kat, they fuck each other.
Chef Mike: Hell yeah. They...
whitekanyewest: they put They put their egg-covered
Faggot Guy: Yes.
Faggot Guy: Hell yes. They stun each other and knock one of them out first.
whitekanyewest: Yep. like hell is Their war is hell and really gay.
Faggot Guy: That's so funny. I got my
Chef Mike: Er Paul, ein Schweinstocker.
whitekanyewest: if
Faggot Guy: cock ring and my stun stun gun because, you know, got knock a bitch out sometimes. that's mr That's exactly what Mr. Nasty is going to do.
whitekanyewest: ah
Faggot Guy: He's so crazy. He's, you know, his Tesla taped a weight onto the steering wheel because, he's like, you know, you got to touch it sometimes when you're in full self-driving mode. But fuck that.
Faggot Guy: I got that weight on there, so don't have to. Yeah. So him him doing the rates racist, racist, him not being racist, doing a racist video makes total sense.
whitekanyewest: I'm not racist. I just voted for Trump six times.
whitekanyewest: I'm not racist.
Faggot Guy: I watched watch Point Break for the first time two nights ago. Very worth it.
whitekanyewest: That's a good movie.
Faggot Guy: Classic. Classic movie.
Faggot Guy: Jared, have you ever seen Point Break?
Chef Mike: I don't think I've ever watched that one.
Faggot Guy: Oh, dude, you would love Point Break.
whitekanyewest: Yeah, that's a good one.
Faggot Guy: bunch a bunch of guys with their shirts off you would love it dude
Chef Mike: Oh, hell yeah.
whitekanyewest: yeah
Chef Mike: what I was hoping for.
Faggot Guy: what do we got next any any other got the snack pack Ritz peanut butter crackers too
whitekanyewest: No, just the Oreos. My parents brought them.
Faggot Guy: Hell yeah. yeah
whitekanyewest: ah really They're really, they're probably intended for my daughter, but
Faggot Guy: Nah, those are going down.
whitekanyewest: It looks pretty good.
Faggot Guy: Those got it. Those got bitten. No.
whitekanyewest: guys ever seen that TV show Dark Winds? That one's good. It's about Navajos.
Faggot Guy: no
Chef Mike: Nope.
Faggot Guy: I think I might just start exploring the dark web. See what's going on.
Chef Mike: Oh, dude, there's a guy. ah i'm not going to be able to find it right now, but he's a I think he's a WWE w e wrestler.
Faggot Guy: Yeah. Shiloh, WWE, is a wannabe w WWE guy. Yeah.
Chef Mike: Yes, and he just posts a bunch of dark web shit that
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Faggot Guy: yeah
Chef Mike: It's very intriguing. I don't know how much of it is real.
Faggot Guy: e It seems like most of it's real. He just needs to get to the point. He needs to post more.
Chef Mike: He definitely does the thing that a lot of, like, I guess I can't knock the hustle because it's working, but like a lot of content creators do where it's like, yeah, it's like they give you, like you said, like 10% of the story and then they're like, come back tomorrow.
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Chef Mike: Follow for more.
Faggot Guy: Fuck no. Just put out the heaters and then have everybody just waiting for another heater.
Chef Mike: So, yeah, ah you said his name. I guess if two two interesting things I've seen from him, he's got like a. A robot called the beast or like an A.I.
Chef Mike: that he downloaded from the dark web called the beast that he like. Put in a weird baby doll body. And it says shit. And ah I assume it's legit. Because ah even if it's fake. It would take some effort. But it like says some.
Chef Mike: Fucking weird ass shit. And it's like an AI that wants to take over the world. So that's kind of funny.
Faggot Guy: What does it say?
Chef Mike: It'll just be like. It'll be like.
whitekanyewest: I think that we can make 10,000 butter chicken.
Chef Mike: Destruction.
Faggot Guy: Kai. yeah
Chef Mike: Yes. Butter chickens are coming my child. Nah just says like. It just. I don't know.
Faggot Guy: Kai.
Chef Mike: He just talks to it and it's like 5,000 butter chickens.
Faggot Guy: Kai.
Chef Mike: What did you say his name was?
Faggot Guy: Yeah, I got and this beast baby.
Chef Mike: Oh, Charlotte.
Faggot Guy: just keeps saying racist, all the racist names for every culture. Yeah, Shiloh WWE. Something like that.
Chef Mike: Okay.
whitekanyewest: It's like, it like ah can't be racist, dude. It's fucking AI.
Faggot Guy: Yeah. What do you want me to do?
Chef Mike: don't
whitekanyewest: He's like, the only only people I care are the white AIs, is dude.
Faggot Guy: It's AI. It's a beast. Yeah, exactly, dude.
Chef Mike: might have missed up this is way creepier than before he so as you guys know. i've been building
Chef Mike: to be put in this body at the same time so now it's controlling both bodies
Chef Mike: hum
Chef Mike: ah I would suggest just go watch it. It's a weird... The AI wanted to be put in my like a weird fucking... it looks like one of the Jabbawockeez, but then it also its it also put itself in like a tiny baby doll, and then in that video, the...
Faggot Guy: Yes.
Chef Mike: the The Jabberwocky's like adult sized body wants to hold its own self as a baby.
Faggot Guy: What the fuck?
Chef Mike: So that, so that's like a, there's stuff there to figure out.
Faggot Guy: no
Chef Mike: Um, but then most recently he's been, he found a web allegedly found a website on the dark web that just sells shoes. But the shoes, they're clearly worn, used shoes, potentially have like blood on them.
Chef Mike: and they And the way that they're listed on the website is like names. So it's like Dylan. It's like a pair like ah Converse, like Chuck Taylor's. It says like Dylan, age 27, $350. And there's just like hundreds of pairs of shoes listed like that. So he bought a pair ah that you had to pay in crypto.
Chef Mike: And it recently arrived and he's going to like test it for blood and stuff. Cause obviously everyone's like, these are the presumption is these are like murder victims shoes or some, like there's some serial killer selling shoes.
Chef Mike: Oh, and then he did a teaser. Like you said, where he unboxed these like cowboy boots he bought. And there was a VHS tape inside the boots. So he has not yet revealed what's on the VHS tape, which clearly is a, is a like,
Chef Mike: I don't know what you'd call that, like a hook.
Faggot Guy: i hope I saw that too. I hope that the VHS tape is just someone getting murdered and just destroys this guy's life.
Chef Mike: I mean, that's definitely the presumption.
Faggot Guy: Oh my god.
whitekanyewest: That's just Mr. Nasty cleaning his cock ring.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, exactly.
whitekanyewest: Ha ha ha ha
Chef Mike: uh... ah
Faggot Guy: Fuck. Yeah, I saw him.
Chef Mike: like so ah
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Chef Mike: so So I finally found ah ah a pawn shop that had a VHS player, and ah I don't know what to tell you guys. It's just a it's a guy named Mr.
whitekanyewest: a
Chef Mike: Nasty with two S's, and he's ah he's hand-washing his cock ring in the sink.
Faggot Guy: i
Chef Mike: ah I don't know. I'm as confused as you are.
Faggot Guy: yeah it's mr nasty he's uh yeah he's he's that fuck he's stroking his shit at a rouse
Chef Mike: Bye.
whitekanyewest: All I can think about is being at our old, like I've never really worked an office job other than our old job. i can just think about walking in. It's just somebody fucking with
Faggot Guy: with a stun gun and a cock ring
whitekanyewest: like, Whoa, Steve, what are you doing?
Faggot Guy: gotta imagine this guy is so emotionally like unstable he's a sociopath so he has no feelings he's just pissed he's like oh no no you know
whitekanyewest: I got fucking... Bro, you don't understand. I got raw egg on this shit.
Faggot Guy: ah Yeah.
whitekanyewest: I got to clean it off.
Faggot Guy: Like, yo, what the fuck? Put that away. He's like, dude, I got raw egg on it. What the what do you want me to do? It's fucked. My whole day's fucked up.
Faggot Guy: i can't I can't dial 200 calls before lunch with no cock ring on.
Chef Mike: You want to wanted to smell like wet dog? You know what raw egg does.
whitekanyewest: holy shit dude.
Faggot Guy: I can't make my 600 dials today if I don't fucking have it. If I'm not juiced up and vibrating. Come on.
Faggot Guy: Jesus Christ, dude. That's our guy, dude. Yeah, I saw the ah that boot video and then recently, i would like an hour ago, I saw him putting... He's like, I got a black light.
Faggot Guy: He's like, I think this is... I love how he's like, I think this is how the black light works. He's like, dude, you just shine it like any light on stuff. What are you talking about?
Chef Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Faggot Guy: and And then he did the he got hydrogen peroxide started putting it on it and started foaming. It's like, okay. It could be blood. Or it could be a genius dark website that someone just has blood spraying on shoes.
Faggot Guy: But it does look legit. Some of the shoes are pretty fucked up.
Chef Mike: Yes.
Faggot Guy: Is it illegal? Is he posting something illegal of buying fucked up shit?
Chef Mike: I mean, good. I don't know. Like he didn't, it's not like by murder victims, shoes.com.
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Chef Mike: Oh, it's, I think if, I think if he found, if he genuinely was sent a VHS tape and that VHS tape, plausibly showed somebody getting murdered or tortured or otherwise, or even just footage of a person who could be a missing person, then like, yeah, I think you probably have a duty to hand that over to the police and like, let them deal with it. But I don't think in and of itself, buying them is a crime. And actually like people say half, like half the interactions you have on the dark web are with feds anyway.
Chef Mike: Like, like no one, no one's there, but them.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, okay. yeah
Chef Mike: So it's like, that could That could also be a trap, you know, like a lot of the allegedly, ah don't spend any time on the dark web, but allegedly like those, you know, like if you found like a invitation to like a live snuff film kind of thing, basically, that those are always like just entrapment.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, he'll definitely watch it if someone's getting killed. He's still posting. He's like, wait till you see video. Wait till you come back and see video number two. This person gets fucking killed.
whitekanyewest: just going to end up being child porn or something.
Faggot Guy: Oh, my God.
Chef Mike: no
Faggot Guy: He destroys his life.
whitekanyewest: but And he's just going to be in possession of it.
Faggot Guy: her
whitekanyewest: It's just going to be ah an elaborate setup.
Chef Mike: I actually kind of fair.
Faggot Guy: It's like you didn't know that cowboy boots was the code word for CP on the tarot.
whitekanyewest: Yeah, exactly.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, i either way, it's a pretty fucking weird website to come across. I heard of, ah I was reading on Reddit about the dark web stuff, like, after I saw that guy's videos, and I guess there's, like, some really fucked up video that just gives you, like, coordinates, and I guess a lot of people have been, I don't know, they do the coordinates and something really fucked up happens to them. I have no idea.
Chef Mike: Yeah, there's definitely ah some genuinely weird shit. There's also just stuff people, you know, it's got like a reputation.
Chef Mike: Like there's like creepypastas about like, I don't ever go on the dark web. I went on the dark web and as soon as I did this thing, there was a knock at my door and you're like, okay, people just have like
whitekanyewest: I
Faggot Guy: Yes.
Chef Mike: you know people just have like a fear of something they don't understand. But also I do think there's genuinely some interesting messed up stuff.
Faggot Guy: Yes. What do you think? What do you think the messed up stuff is?
whitekanyewest: mean, always thought the only use for the dark web was to buy drugs.
Chef Mike: Uh,
Chef Mike: yeah. I mean, I think there's,
Faggot Guy: right Drug CP.
Chef Mike: probably less people just doing silly shit than you, than you would be led to believe. But yeah, I mean, I think it's probably people sell drugs, probably facilitate some human trafficking.
Faggot Guy: True, true.
Chef Mike: Uh, yeah, I'm assuming that's where most of the CP is, uh, uh, that kind of shit.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, I could imagine.
Faggot Guy: I think he got gnomed one time. Like you do a service and you get gnomed. You just have no matter where you are.
Chef Mike: Yes.
Faggot Guy: How does that work?
Chef Mike: Um... I don't... I mean, I think that's what I mean. There is some... Not silly shit, because it's... Who knows? Maybe they're getting something out of it. But you're like, yeah.
Chef Mike: Uh... Yeah.
Faggot Guy: Still pretty creepy, though, if you just saw some character on your ring doorbell putting out the gnomes on your lawn.
Chef Mike: Somebody... Somebody...
Chef Mike: Right. And there's enough of... There's enough of a network of people who participate, like people who are participants of, I guess, like gnoming and also, but also are like keeping it secret that you can reliably, you can reliably get gnomed within like a reasonable amount of time.
Faggot Guy: Yeah. It's a syndicate.
Chef Mike: And then also, so it's like if somebody's doing, it's not some, it's not one guy who's like flying to LA and then like flying to London and then flying to Boston. Right. It's like, there's a network of gnome people.
Faggot Guy: They spread out within like 100 miles of where the pinpoint is.
Chef Mike: Which would also in a way, like we, like we complain about,
Faggot Guy: Where their location is.
Chef Mike: you know, our old job and boss, you know, boss being like, Hey, I need you in Tampa and in on Thursday. And you'd be like, fuck this.
Faggot Guy: Yes.
Chef Mike: Like that's these people like the, there can't be, there's also not that many.
Faggot Guy: okay
Chef Mike: Cause like that many people can't keep a secret. So say there's like no more than 100. And that's probably generous gnome people around the world.
Faggot Guy: That's lot.
Chef Mike: Yeah. Yeah.
Chef Mike: You, you are like just chilling and you get like a message and it's like, Hey, Hey man, you're the closest known person to this new address that these new GPS coordinates that we hacked.
Chef Mike: You gotta, you gotta drive four hours to Dubuque and gnome someone's ring camera. And you're like, fuck, that's what I, that's what I agreed to when I took the oath of the gnome people.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, but they're pumped up to it. They love that shit.
Faggot Guy: You think, why can't it just be on the regular web, though?
Chef Mike: um
Faggot Guy: could gnome somebody. How much is it?
Chef Mike: Get gnomed.
Faggot Guy: We got to gnome somebody.
Chef Mike: I guess because it's meant to be... it's Most people aren't using it to... to do it for themselves.
Chef Mike: Like most people aren't like, I'm just going to out of curiosity, pay for these gnomes and do a mess with my own self.
Chef Mike: It's like, I think probably ah people do that to harass other people. So it's probably on the dark web because can't, you can't actually have like a business that is
Faggot Guy: Fuck yeah.
Chef Mike: stalking and harassing people legally. I imagine.
Faggot Guy: Alright, we're gonna and yeah we're going to have to send it.
Chef Mike: Go daddy's not going to host that.
Faggot Guy: We're gonna have to send the gnomes out. I'll split the cost with you.
Chef Mike: I'm with it.
Faggot Guy: That's a harmless prank.
Chef Mike: Yeah. When you know what it is.
Faggot Guy: But I guess if you don't, it's pretty fucking great.
Chef Mike: Yeah.
Faggot Guy: You're like, what the fuck?
Chef Mike: Yeah, somebody who doesn't know and they just wake up. I mean, depending on what you paid for, like wake up with like 500 gnomes in their yard or wake up to like ring camera footage of a gnome in there looking, you know, at their house and like, you know.
Faggot Guy: Oh, yeah, that's pretty fucked.
Chef Mike: But once you know, I mean, I assume you just Google and you're like, has anyone ever heard of this? And it's like, yeah, somebody somebody's paying to fuck with you. Somebody you angered somebody enough in your life.
Faggot Guy: Yes.
Chef Mike: That they're paying non-trivial money in crypto also. Like, it's not that hard to like... But like, I wouldn't immediately know how to get like dark web crypto ready.
Faggot Guy: Just send it to the wallet. You just send it from one wallet to the other one.
Chef Mike: Yeah, I wouldn't immediately know how to do that is what I'm saying.
Faggot Guy: Just...
Chef Mike: i'm I'm positive I could figure it out, but...
Faggot Guy: You know, use PGP for the addresses and you're good to go.
Chef Mike: Yeah. all right, dude. I'll talk down to me.
Faggot Guy: So can you do.
whitekanyewest: Maybe we can get sponsored by a cock ring brand.
Faggot Guy: Oh, the dark, the dark web cock rings.
Chef Mike: That's how you, yeah, that's probably what the good ones are.
Faggot Guy: It's like a one with blood on it, probably.
Chef Mike: Oh my gosh.
Faggot Guy: Eighteen hundred dollars.
whitekanyewest: Comes pre-egged.
Faggot Guy: Jesse, 29, Zin.
whitekanyewest: Hmm.
Faggot Guy: Can you do like a gnome, one of the gnomes? Can you like have it where one just keeps popping up like, you know, every other day or something?
Chef Mike: Yeah, I think I have not deep dove into like what exactly it is, but I know that it's like a there's there's levels of service you can pay for because I know people have gotten like I woke up and there was
Faggot Guy: got
Chef Mike: you know, 200 gnomes on my front lawn. What the fuck is this? And like, or so, yeah, I think you could probably, if you pay them, you know what they're asking or you can ah ask, there's a levels of service.
Faggot Guy: you got know
Chef Mike: So I imagine you could just be like, yeah, want one gnome on this person's lawn. Who knows? Maybe they wouldn't. Cause like at some point, Maybe not the third night, but like they're going to set up alternate cameras or have the police stake the house out or something.
Chef Mike: But.
Faggot Guy: Do they disable the cameras?
Chef Mike: Hmm.
Faggot Guy: That's so creepy. I just think of seeing a gnome pop up on your ring camera. like, what the fuck?
Chef Mike: Yeah, no bueno.
Faggot Guy: Maybe you should just
Chef Mike: Probably. It's probably a risk that we're even talking about this right now.
Faggot Guy: should just do a service where it's like somebody just, you're like, you ah you want weird shit to pop up on someone's ring camera. And then you just like walk like walk in front of it with like a weird mask or something.
Faggot Guy: That's not a bad service.
Chef Mike: We should just do a dark web service where Anthony Jr. just harasses your harasses your wife and sends everyone you know pictures of his dick.
Faggot Guy: Oh my, get a hold of your information.
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, I'm looking for a job. heard you have a job here. not getting on the call unless you Venmo me $100. exactly. He's probably
Chef Mike: it's Honestly, Anthony Jr.'s regular day-to-day behavior is not that far off from like a dark web harassment service.
Faggot Guy: no oh exactly he's probably professional. I think if you unknowingly hired him, whoever on the dark web, a seasoned dark web would be like, this guy is a fucking veteran.
Faggot Guy: Wherever you got this guy from, he's ah he's the, what is it, Mr.
whitekanyewest: really
Faggot Guy: Wolf in Pulp Fiction or whatever? What is that? No, Reservoir Dogs? That's who he is Anthony Jr.'s above everybody in the dark web game of harassment.
Faggot Guy: comes to my work. He comes to my house. He sends me dick pictures block him. He sends me on email.
Chef Mike: Yes.
Faggot Guy: He calls the Massapequa PD on me and says that they're harassing his wife.
Faggot Guy: That was Anthony Jr. Post. What was it? What was he like? Yeah, I'm going to have to stalk some Massapequa PD's wives.
Chef Mike: yes
Faggot Guy: going to have to stalking their wives.
whitekanyewest: Guys just lit, lit all the time.
Faggot Guy: All right. On three. What time is everybody waking up tomorrow? ah Ready? One, two, three, four o'clock.
Chef Mike: Mine.
Faggot Guy: Or 4 p.m.
whitekanyewest: i go
Faggot Guy: Paul, what time?
whitekanyewest: I don't work tomorrow, so whenever the kids wake up, so I'm like six.
Faggot Guy: Nice.
Faggot Guy: 7 o'clock, 7.30 p.m. 1, 2, 3, 2, 2, 2, one two three two p two two two thirty p m
whitekanyewest: I wish, dude. haven't slept in it a long time.
Faggot Guy: probably probably six a m for me anybody's wondering
whitekanyewest: Dude, I burnt the fucking shit out of my fingers yesterday.
Chef Mike: One more.
whitekanyewest: i was we repairing a bridge and I like spun the head off of a screw. Wasn't thinking about it. Went to grab it to just pull it out and it was like flaming hot.
Chef Mike: Ooh.
Faggot Guy: the
Chef Mike: Yeah.
whitekanyewest: I've got a really good just giant white mark on my thumb and forefinger
Faggot Guy: burned the shit out of my thumb three days ago too. Had the cock ring in the sink and went off.
whitekanyewest: and
Chef Mike: Yeah.
Faggot Guy: Electrocuted my whole body.
Chef Mike: We occasionally play this game called Hot Rock. It's where you put a rock in the fire when you're having a bonfire. And then you fish it out and you just throw it around.
Chef Mike: And sometimes hot rock is too hot. And I burned the shit out of my ah ring finger and middle finger two weeks ago playing Hot Rock.
whitekanyewest: Hmm.
Faggot Guy: Now you're stronger than ever.
Chef Mike: Oh, yeah. Yeah. Every now and then you get burned playing hot rock. You knew what you were signing up for playing hot rock.
Faggot Guy: True, true, true.
Faggot Guy: yeah
Faggot Guy: What else is going on in the world right now?
Chef Mike: Oh, is anyone... I don't have a follow-up, so if you're like, no, then next topic. does anyone Is anyone following the Diddy trial at all?
Faggot Guy: No, no. I don't even think it's a real thing still.
Chef Mike: Yeah.
Faggot Guy: don't even know if it's really happening.
whitekanyewest: I mean, he's gay as fuck, right? Yeah.
Chef Mike: Oh, for sure.
Faggot Guy: It has to be, right?
Chef Mike: he's gay He's gay as fuck, and and by proxy, that means, like...
Chef Mike: I would say...
Faggot Guy: It's gay. Yeah.
Chef Mike: 80% of ah famous people are also gay.
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Chef Mike: Because they all they all went and went back.
Faggot Guy: What about the Karen Reed trial? She winning or losing?
Chef Mike: ah She is ah She's definitely, in my opinion, she's winning.
Faggot Guy: Okay. That's good to know.
Chef Mike: it In my opinion, the defense's case, both both sides have put on a better... Arguments this time this trial, but I think the defense has done a as has done a better, better job.
Faggot Guy: Okay.
Chef Mike: The prosecution rested their case. I think last week. The defense is probably halfway, maybe ah third of the way through their case. um I don't personally see how anyone could.
Chef Mike: i can see how people might be like. yeah, who knows? Like she was drunk. Who knows what happened kind of thing.
Faggot Guy: Hell yeah.
Chef Mike: But like, I don't think anyone could, who's watching this trial can be like the prosecution proved anything.
Faggot Guy: Got it.
Chef Mike: Like they don't even have a coherent theory of like, she hit him with her car and he died. And it's like, they don't even have that.
Faggot Guy: Okay.
Chef Mike: ah so I would argue, And allegedly the jury or not even allegedly there's people in the court. They just can't say who they are, but, uh, the jury's younger this time.
Chef Mike: Like it wasn't really, supposedly all in their thirties or seem to be all in their thirties.
Faggot Guy: Oh, shit.
Chef Mike: So I think I, um if you asked me last time, cause I've been in a jury and like, I've been in a jury and I've been the guy who wouldn't,
Chef Mike: budge on my opinion and made basically like made three other people change their vote because I was like, I don't want to go back to work. So if you want to be here for fucking six more days, having the same conversation, I'll have that conversation.
Chef Mike: Or you can say not guilty and then we can go home today more or less.
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Chef Mike: And like got three people to be like, fine, I don't care that much. I'll say not guilty.
Faggot Guy: okay
Chef Mike: Uh, the last trial there was the foreman was a old guy and a cop. And they were hung on the murder count. Uh, I think probably he was that guy for that jury where like, he probably, he probably like argued really well in a way that made a lot of the other jury, like not enough, obviously not the entire jury, but enough of them be like, yeah, okay.
Chef Mike: ah Yeah. I think this guy's right.
Chef Mike: uh, so i'm hoping, or it seems like maybe with a group of younger people that they wouldn't have that this time, they wouldn't have some like literal ex cop being like, yeah, she's definitely guilty.
Chef Mike: And like, you should vote guilty. Uh, so yeah, think she's going to get away with it, which is great.
Faggot Guy: So she's going to get off.
Chef Mike: Cause one less cop, you know,
Faggot Guy: I didn't know um how terrible of an accent that she has.
Chef Mike: Dude, they all do. She's got... Yeah. Especially for you who kind of grew up near Fall River. She's got a really...
Faggot Guy: Such a terrible accent.
Chef Mike: by the way, freak Aaron Reed, uh, she's got a really grading. Like if you watch those like HBO documentaries, hard to watch just cause of how much she talks and then, but this whole trial, like the, uh, the prosecutor, Hank Brennan, he's like, I don't know if he grew up here. He's definitely got like a, think he's got a Boston accent.
Chef Mike: Um,
Chef Mike: ah really hard to really hard to listen to. And then the judge, the judge ah Beverly Canoni, she's like got a South Shore accent. She'd be like, butre we're doing a half day today.
Chef Mike: You're like, we just...
Faggot Guy: What is that? What is that? That is not the accent.
Chef Mike: yeah I got it wrong. ah I need to practice that one. It's fine. um But, ah yeah.
whitekanyewest: Damn, do it again, I missed
Chef Mike: Knowing that this is like... There's just like a national...
Faggot Guy: Do it again.
Chef Mike: No, can't do it again.
Faggot Guy: Do it again.
whitekanyewest: Do it again, I missed it
Chef Mike: Half day. We're doing a half day today.
whitekanyewest: What is that? Is that a British accent? What we doing here?
Chef Mike: um Knowing that this is a nationally, if not worldwide, watched trial and everyone sounds like idiots.
whitekanyewest: oh wait a minute, what accent is that supposed to be?
Faggot Guy: What the fuck accent is that?
whitekanyewest: ah What accent is that?
Faggot Guy: Do it half day today, mate. South Shore, you know, all River and shit.
Chef Mike: Yeah. Yeah. yeah classic South Shore accent, guys. I don't know what your issue is here.
Faggot Guy: ah Right outside. was Basically, the sick cosign is what she sounds like.
Chef Mike: Yeah, she's... That's like that um that's like a Stoughton, Canton accent, guys.
Faggot Guy: Doing half day today, mate.
whitekanyewest: and youre you're doing like ah you're doing like a cockney English person accent.
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Faggot Guy: yeah Yeah.
Chef Mike: I didn't...
Faggot Guy: So, judges from fucking Roxbury and Norchester area, she's all like...
Chef Mike: It's not that kind of... It's not not it's not that accent, though.
whitekanyewest: G'day, mate.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, she's... We got a wrong jury here, mate. ah You know how they sound. They sound fucking crazy.
whitekanyewest: but
Faggot Guy: yeah the
Chef Mike: yes You guys need to listen.
Faggot Guy: We're going to Dunkin' Donuts.
whitekanyewest: Oh,
Faggot Guy: Dude, you got so bad.
Faggot Guy: the You know, the fucking judge, she's from Dorchester. She's saying, you know, Tiny Dancer, Rocket Man, Benny and the Jet. You know all of it.
Faggot Guy: You know, she was ah she was a longtime judge on American Idol forever.
Chef Mike: Let me find it.
Faggot Guy: She was really mean. think it was Simon something. She's now she's from Dorchester.
Chef Mike: Yeah.
Faggot Guy: She's now the judge.
Chef Mike: Judge Beth, yeah. Let
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Chef Mike: me find this.
whitekanyewest: I'll do your red now do yours again.
Faggot Guy: Yeah, dude.
Chef Mike: Well, no.
Faggot Guy: Two years. yeah
Chef Mike: She does say Hoff. I don't know. i don't She says Hoff without an L in it.
Faggot Guy: We're about to have a hung jury here.
Chef Mike: Today was one. No. An issue has come to my attention that is going to make it necessary that I talk to each one of you annual individually over at Sidebar with counsel.
Faggot Guy: He's dead.
Chef Mike: Sidebar. It's like a hard Boston, like Sidebar.
Faggot Guy: isn't even stop She doesn't even sound like she has a Massachusetts accent.
Chef Mike: not She's not saying Sidebar, but Sidebar. It's like a not actually that far off from what I did, guys.
Faggot Guy: No way, dude.
Chef Mike: while so i'm going to ask. Don't speculate as to what going to talk to you about. Please, we can go back to the deliberation room, talk about anything but this case, and I'll see each of you individually.
Chef Mike: An issue is kind of defined.
Faggot Guy: Fucking Karen...
whitekanyewest: What's the issue? What snitch, dude.
Faggot Guy: Karen Reed is like...
Chef Mike: That was a few weeks ago. She basically just... ah We don't actually know because you don't ever hear what happened at Sidebar, but... um ah who everyone presumes that a one juror said another juror was talking about the case. Like they're not even supposed to talk to each other about the case, but like, how could you not?
whitekanyewest: what a snitch du
Chef Mike: So the assumption is ah juror overheard two jurors like talking about it and then reported it. And that was what that was about, but they didn't strike any jurors, which last trial by this point, I think they had already struck three.
Chef Mike: And we're more than halfway through the case and they haven't struck one or whatever they call them alternated. Like when they get rid of one mid trial. Um, so that's also kind of good.
Faggot Guy: she yeah She sounds she sounds like horrific compared to what she looks like in the interview thumbnail always. Like, oh, here's Karen Reed discussing her case.
Faggot Guy: She's like, I didn't fucking hit John, okay? Like, I didn't know what the fuck I got out of my car.
whitekanyewest: Excuse me, excuse me.
Chef Mike: is
Faggot Guy: I didn't fucking hit him, okay? He's like, John's a fucking idiot. Now he's fucking dead. So I didn't do it.
Chef Mike: Did we already talk about her text messages with the other cop? The one they think...
Faggot Guy: Yeah, I think so, right?
Chef Mike: He's like, you're hot.
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Chef Mike: No, you're hot.
Faggot Guy: Yeah. Yeah, exactly.
Chef Mike: Why do you like me? ah just I just think you think like me. We're from the same town.
Faggot Guy: We're from... Yeah. We're from fucking Tewksbury. Like, we fucking go crazy together.
Chef Mike: Yeah, I don't know if we talked about it on pod or not, but if you ah if you're interested in this at all, go back to the... I don't know what day it was. Probably somewhere around like day 14 or something.
Chef Mike: Go back into the trial where they read her text messages with ah whatever his name is, Brian Higgins, out loud. like They have them read out loud in court, and it's the most cringe adult flirting you'll ever fucking hear in your life.
Faggot Guy: Oh my god.
Faggot Guy: You're fucking hot.
Chef Mike: Yeah, it's literally.
Faggot Guy: Yeah.
Chef Mike: We're from the same town.
Faggot Guy: yeah
Chef Mike: yeah You think like me. You're fucking. I think you're hot.
Faggot Guy: We think alike. i The next, next, you're fucking wicked hot. and The next one's like, I saw you at fucking Duncan. You get French Rinello, you fag.
Chef Mike: Yes.
whitekanyewest: Ha ha ha ha
Faggot Guy: ah
Chef Mike: Yes. ah
Faggot Guy: Oh my God. That's so embarrassing.
Faggot Guy: Oh, fuck. That must be so cringe to just be and fucking fighting for your fighting for your life and having those read out loud in front of everybody.
Chef Mike: she She's there. The the person who... i think it was... They they had a ah different officer named Yuri Buchanik read them aloud. So this guy's like... ah You get to see you get to see how your friend flirts and he like when he doesn't think anyone else is...
Faggot Guy: God.
Chef Mike: That you know like it's like that must just have been like the funniest shit to to read. like Obviously, preferably not out loud and in court, but to get to see that is like...
Chef Mike: is fucking hilarious.
whitekanyewest: You could just like sleep on my couch.
Faggot Guy: yeah I just say that hey I live like right around the corner from your work and you know you sleep on the couch
Chef Mike: Yeah. a
whitekanyewest: like a place to crash. could just sleep on the couch.
Faggot Guy: yeah so you know you can crash on the couch and I'll wash my cock ring in the sink and you know no big deal
Chef Mike: ah Don't worry about, babe, what's in the sink? that's a That's like a... ah That keeps like my bags closed. I just use it to keep my... It's not a Cochrane.
Faggot Guy: Oh my god.
whitekanyewest: Hey, if you guys want to leave, you can leave.
Faggot Guy: but yeah think that's what the stun gun is for is when the woman asks about the cock ring.
Chef Mike: yeah
Faggot Guy: You stun it right in the neck.
whitekanyewest: Could be.
Faggot Guy: Shut the fuck up!
Faggot Guy: Oh my god.
Chef Mike: Wait, do you need this to stay hard?
whitekanyewest: this this thing
Chef Mike: Shut up, bitch.
Faggot Guy: Wow, you're fucking wicked hot. In your wicked hot.
Faggot Guy: I just wish John wasn't such a fucking fag. i ge
Chef Mike: ah
Faggot Guy: So the guy, real quick before we sign off, the guy she was flirting with, was he at the house that when that guy died?
Chef Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah
Faggot Guy: Jesus Christ.
whitekanyewest: Hmm.
Chef Mike: yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So there's videos of them at the bar before they go to the house. And they're like, call it what you want. Like either play fighting or or like either play fighting in a friendly way.
Chef Mike: Or they're getting each other's face and like kind of talking shit, but not going to be in a full blown fight in a bar.
Faggot Guy: Yep, because they're cops. They can't do that against the law.
Chef Mike: Cops. And like, you know, so so the defense would say he was in his face being like, you know. You know. Your girl likes me better than you kind of shit, like egging him on.
Chef Mike: And the prosecution would have you to believe they were just like playing grab ass, so to speak.
Chef Mike: That's for the jury to decide. but yeah, he was, they were at the bar together.
Faggot Guy: True.
Chef Mike: They were play fight. I mean, they, you know, you can't tell what it, they're clearly not like in an all out brawl. They're just like fake kind of like taking shots at each other in the bar.
Chef Mike: You can see on the video. And then, Yeah, they went back to the house. Karen Reed wasn't there. John O'Keefe dies in the yard. That guy's like, uh.
Chef Mike: And he hasn't been called to the stand. He hasn't been asked to testify yet. And he might not be. so
Faggot Guy: Thank God.
Chef Mike: Who even knows?
Faggot Guy: Well, that's an episode, guys. Free Karen Reed.
Faggot Guy: so Go follow Mr. Nasty. And then get back to us on what you think and join the Discord and chat with us there. Join the red Reddit and maybe we'll start a Patreon when we have some more time to record some more content for everybody.
Faggot Guy: So yeah, that's where we're at.
Chef Mike: All right.
Faggot Guy: Alright. You alright?
Chef Mike: Goodbye.
Faggot Guy: Goodbye everybody.
Chef Mike: Off.
