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Doing Blow at Applebees
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Transcript
Global Conflicts and Leadership
00:00:22
Speaker
I didn't have it. This would have never happened with me. You know what wouldn't have happened? Ukraine wouldn't have happened. Taiwan and all this tough talk with Taiwan wouldn't have happened.
00:00:25
Speaker
Happy national prayer day. Stay prayed up. God bless.
Surprising Events in Israel?
00:00:31
Speaker
And what's going on with Israel right now? People were shocked. I wasn't shocked.
Law Enforcement Humor
00:00:43
Speaker
No trial, no nothing. Journalists, we have a special jail for journalists. You're stealing, right to jail. You're playing music too loud, right to jail, right away. You're driving too fast, jail. Slow, jail. You're charging too high prices for sweaters, glasses. You're right to jail. You undercook fish, believe it or not, jail. You overcook chicken, also jail. Undercook, overcook. You make an appointment with the dentist and you don't show up, believe it or not, jail, right away. We have the best patients in the world.
00:01:13
Speaker
Because of the jail.
Destined for Greatness: A Fishy Tale
00:01:22
Speaker
When I was a kid, I fell into a river and a fish bumped me out of the water. I was supposed to die.
00:01:39
Speaker
But a fish bumped me out with its nose. That was the earth telling me I'm supposed to do something great. And I know that's the driving cruder. It has to be. You know what I mean, James?
Welcome to 'Dudes R Us'
00:02:02
Speaker
Welcome to your favorite podcast ever made, Dudes R Us. Thank you for subscribing and downloading it means a lot. We hope this helps if you have a shitty job or a shitty day. You are a part of the team and we got your back. No one can stop us. Which made it even worse.
00:02:19
Speaker
It's like I'm not just fat woman. Yeah, just drunk. Yeah, you can you can miss me with them. Yeah, she like asked me where I was from and then she was like, oh, was asking like, well,
00:02:39
Speaker
Paul's wife's friends about like her job and they... Jesus Christ. We're fucking here to bowl with like our friends. What year was your crew of? We had six people, seven people. Zayn, Shannon, Sal, and Shahanah. Six people.
00:03:00
Speaker
Well, the craziest thing too is like Kings isn't, it's not like you're going to like a nice bowling alley. It's not like you're going to like real, it's not a real bowling alley and it's not like a nice bar. Yeah. It's kind of like a, it's like a Dave and Busters, but it has a bowling alley in it. That's awesome.
00:03:19
Speaker
And these people waited like seven hours or something crazy. There's not that many lanes, right? There must be like four lanes then, right? No, they got a lot. Well,
Bowling Night Chaos
00:03:30
Speaker
so the thing that we don't realize is there's 10 on that side. There's a whole other side of that building that is also a row of lanes. So there was just hot lanes all night. Yeah. These people didn't know the lanes were hot. They were looking for a reservation.
00:03:50
Speaker
But I also think they probably could have been accommodated and the people just managing the booking were super insomitable. What day was it? Saturday? Yeah, Saturday. Nice.
Yard House Experiences
00:04:05
Speaker
It was fun. Then we went over to this other, we went to the yard house, which is like a chain. Had some dinner there and these two women in this booth behind us started making out. Oh, yeah. I respect that. I'm all equality however you want to go about it. The two boyfriends looked psyched. They had two boyfriends there? They showed up two couples and then the girl started- What the fuck?
00:04:31
Speaker
What the fuck were the boyfriends doing? Just high five him. No way. I think he's hard to listen to. Yeah. Just started looking at their phones. That's fucking weird. That's like at a chain restaurant too. Yeah. Yeah. I'd say the yard house is like an elevated Applebee's update.
00:04:57
Speaker
uh yeah that's probably i mean they would they would hate that descriptor but that's pretty true the feel that we like like the food is much better the food's actually pretty good yeah the food's pretty good see i think it's just everything i think everything's fucked there's just not enough people or or
00:05:18
Speaker
The business has spent the last 20 years expanding and just building too much shit. And now there's just too much stuff.
Business Overexpansion Woes
00:05:29
Speaker
I live within five miles of me, there's seven grocery stores. There just doesn't need to be that many.
00:05:35
Speaker
everything's understaffed because like that yardhouse was also mega under like they just hadn't cleaned the floors all day nope i know there's the entire like every surface of that of the that restaurant was like coated in like a tiny slick of oil because it just like
00:05:50
Speaker
You know, like the smoke or the like steam and smoke from like cooking just fills the air and that oil settles everywhere. And they just hadn't like mopped probably in a few days. And you're just like, what the fuck guys? Like I'm eating here. Yeah, there's a few things that were alarming there. That bathroom was completely fucked. Just like a very dirty bath. I mean, I get it was like late in the day, but again, like,
00:06:19
Speaker
You schedule a few different moments of cleaning the bathroom throughout the day. It's not just like morning side work. It's like, no, it's 10 p.m. now. You probably probably needed to be cleaned, you know, midday at some point.
00:06:33
Speaker
Or only like, um, I guess the reason I'd say it's like elevated apple bees is because they have those like, uh, things at the end of the table where you can order your own food. Like you don't have the waiter. Yeah, dude. But the waiter never like, our waiter was pretty attentive. I'll give him that. He was pretty good. He like made sure we had drinks and everything. What was his name? Uh, I think he was like Pepe. Yeah.
00:06:58
Speaker
but another was like, you can just use this thing, which is fine because I'm sure he wanted a tip. Yeah, two waiters that were against using something that's logical.
00:07:10
Speaker
Yeah. Well, so the funny, the best part about it was that, uh, so it's a little table computer where you could, you could fully do everything. You could order apps, order drinks, uh, split the check, call, call a server over, like anything you need to do.
00:07:32
Speaker
But yeah, we'd have a waiter, he's serving us, he's taking our orders. But then he takes our orders, writes it down on a little, you know, the little notepad they write shit down on, and then stands there and inputs the order into the little computer at the table. No way. He's not even like going away. No way. That dude rules. It's not like he was down to the table and doing it.
00:07:56
Speaker
Yeah. So you're like, all right, you're just going to hang out here for like another five minutes. Like, what is your, like, what are, what are you here for? Actually, what are you here for? That's so funny. Yeah, it was great. Just bad, bad.
00:08:23
Speaker
He had the fifths. That's good. That's good. You guys had a bunch of plastic mugs in front of you. I feel like the part that kind of fucked me up too is it was like, he, like I said, he was attentive and he was a good server, but like,
00:08:54
Speaker
just to Jared's point there was just literally no point just that dude that dude could have just been like hey I'm just gonna bring your drinks over and your food and if you guys could just give me a tip I know he would have got the same amount of a tip probably oh yeah cuz like who's not gonna tip 20% at this point yeah you did something I'm not like I'm not judging I mean I guess I am to some level but I'm not like
00:09:16
Speaker
Oh, you didn't do enough work to deserve, like you didn't carry enough plates to us to deserve a 20% tip. Like you're getting like at least 20% if you did something. Yeah, 100%. It's still fucking funny.
00:09:33
Speaker
There's just a lot of weird shit going on. There's a group behind us that was like a whole, they looked like they could have been like college frat boys, but I'm going to guess they were probably high school seniors because they were there with their family. Like the, yeah, all the parents were sitting at a different table. What the fuck? But they all had the same, maybe it makes sense now that I think about it, if they were like high school seniors, they all had the same outfit on.
00:09:57
Speaker
I think in retrospect, they all went to like, they were probably all like Catholic school kids or something who just took their ties. Like they were all in navy blue, like chinos in a light blue button up. It was all weird just coming from Zavarian or something. Yeah. Fucking Zavarian. Late night mass. Saturday mass. Saturday mass. It's a thing. Maybe they all came out once.
00:10:26
Speaker
Like, this is how I fucked up this place. I went to the bathroom, and Jared said it was gross in there, and there was just somebody blowing line, blowing line to boil it. I swear to God, I walk in, and you can just hear this person snorting in the bathroom, and then he's just laughing.
00:10:41
Speaker
At the yard house. Not like at a club or anything. We're at a fucking yard house and those guys doing coke in the bathroom. You're like, all right. You're going to go back to your seat and have mac and cheese squared. Crazy.
00:10:56
Speaker
Someone else came in, all this ruffle fries. That dude rules. I'm sitting there taking a piss. He's doing coke in the back room, like in the toilet with the door shut. This other dude comes in, tries to open the stall to go in with him, sees me, goes, oh shit, and turns around and walks out of the bathroom.
00:11:14
Speaker
Yeah, you know how pops kind of just looks like a cop. Oh, no, how are these things? For Maine he's he's getting busted Fuck the students wearing a flannel on a Boston New Hampshire undercover come up
00:11:38
Speaker
I just kind of believe that dude comes in and like tries to walk into the toilet. He's like, oh, fuck. Shit. Oh, no. That's so fucking awesome, dude. That dude just yacked up at that place. A yard house.
00:11:56
Speaker
like them. I mean, that in that comparison is literally as absurd to be doing coke in the bathroom with an Applebee's. I don't know. I mean, you're nuts. It just makes no sense. I couldn't imagine what the fuck that type of night would even be.
00:12:12
Speaker
It'd be terrible to probably go back and sit at your table and you're all jacked up. Oh, yeah, you get to sit at the table. That's a little tab in your fingers sweating. I'm like, maybe you're at the yard house, uh, like downtown by Fenway and you're like going to go to a bar after. And so you're like, I mean, not that you, I mean, pre-gaming quote, like kinda, but no, you're at the yard house in Dedham, Massachusetts.
00:12:38
Speaker
Yeah, dang it. When you leave, you have no other option but to drive home. Like, there is nothing fun to do to get into. Go to LL Bean's. Yeah, go to the LL Bean's store, hit up the Whole Foods that's open till midnight, gets them like... That's awesome. Weird tofu... Thai tofu.
00:13:07
Speaker
Rice. Yeah. Oh, man. There's a lot of shit going on that night.
00:13:20
Speaker
I mean, personally, I just wanted to go to the Mexican restaurant, but got to do what the crowd wants to do. I didn't know I wanted to go to them. I wanted to go to them. I mean, I wasn't even hungry, but I was like, I'll go to that fucking Mexican restaurant. And then somehow the plans changed into going to Yard House, and I was like... Should've went to Texas Road House instead. Can't go to Texas Road House actively trying to kill Paul's wife. Why? Do you feel allergic to peanuts? Oh, my bad. I didn't know that. Sorry for that.
00:13:48
Speaker
All right. Yeah, you're real jerk dude. She's a listener too. She's gonna hear this My bad, but five guys out of the question then. Yeah, there is a no. Yeah gonna what the five guys
00:14:03
Speaker
There's a Shake Shack there, though. I've never been to one of those. The Shake Shack's pretty dope. It's a little bit overrated these days. Why is everybody like, is it just burgers? It's like mashed burgers, they got glizzy, they got, and they've got these like really, like they've got these really fucked up shakes that are so good, but you're like, this is also 1200 calories in one drink, but they're really good. I think Shake Shack is okay.
00:14:33
Speaker
But what was that spot right next to Fenway? Tasty. Tasty's real good. Yeah, I feel like that place was actually really good. And then Shake Shack is like the McDonald's version of that place. Yeah, Tasty Burger is like, I mean, Tasty Burger is not a national chain or anything as far as I know. I don't know how many there are. There's not many though. But yeah, Tasty Burger was a fucking real good burger. Um,
00:14:57
Speaker
I have mad respect for that restaurant group. They do Austin only. There's one in Cambridge. There's one in Central Square, Harvard Square, Back Bay, and Funway. Yeah. Shouts out Tasty. Shouts out our fathers. That place is fucking good, dude. See, if you're going to do Coke in a bathroom, Tasty would be a good place to go do Coke in a bathroom. Oh, yeah. That'd be a great place to do it. I'm in. Never mind. What?
00:15:28
Speaker
Nothing. I was just, it's hard to remember, you know, when he was 18. What about a fat burger? We got one of those down here somewhere. Uh, I don't know that I know that one. I don't think that exists up here. When you first said it, I, I got confused for heart attack burger in Vegas, which I also, you're also in Vegas.
00:15:57
Speaker
It's, uh, ice cubes placing you to rap about. Oh, okay. I've seen this before. We don't have them up here.
00:16:05
Speaker
Art Attack Burger in Vegas, they make you wear a hospital down. That sucks. You go in. It's like a 30 minute lunch party to wear in a hospital. Yeah. And you were up here. They probably have them in every big city, but there was a place up here called Dick's Last Resort. Did you ever hear about it? I've heard about those, but I've never participated in that stuff. Yeah, fuck no. It's definitely more like a
00:16:36
Speaker
What the fuck are they called? Bachelorette party kind of thing. But yeah, like those restaurants, they, so that restaurant, Dick's Last Resort, they would make everyone, if you went there, they'd make a paper hat for everyone and they'd write some insult on it. Like they'd, you know, write fatty on a paper hat. And then the weight stat was kind of rude to you. Like their shtick is that they're like. What if you're rude to them, but you'd give it back to them?
00:17:05
Speaker
Uh, you can give it back. There's like, so if you, you could, you could search it on YouTube of like Dick Flaffler, like there's people who try to, you try to throw it back at them, but uh, you know, they're professionals. I'd give it back to them, just get really fucked up. They're pretty good at like flipping your, you know, flipping your attempt at talking back into just a devastating burn. What if you just degrade them on working at a fucking restaurant?
00:17:34
Speaker
I mean, that might work, and I bet also at some point they're just like, all right, man, this is a- If you say they're license plate back to him.
00:17:43
Speaker
Yeah, that would be pretty good. I think at some point they're probably like, all right, guys, this isn't real. Like, you chose to come here for laying the sheet, for, like, the shtick. Don't take it too seriously. But anyway, so they'll just be assholes to you. Like, you'll make, well, like, if you order, or at least my understanding of it, again, I haven't been, is, like, you order, they'll make funny, like, the food you order, and they'll just, like, insult everyone. You talking about what you haven't done before?
00:18:11
Speaker
Well, it was like a popular thing when I was in college. So like a lot of people went, I feel like I got the experience through people telling me what it was like. But I also could be just flat out making some shit up. But yeah, so Heart Attack Burger in Vegas was, I think, the Vegas version of that, where it was like a shitty burger place like Boston Burger Company. They made you wear hospital gowns and they were just really irreverent about the fact that you're like,
00:18:41
Speaker
Hey, fatty, you're gonna eat this big burger fatty and die, you know? So I assume it's like anywhere. They have a big scale outside the restaurant that you can just like a human size scale you can stand on.
00:18:59
Speaker
Yeah. I'm not aware of the big human side of the island. Every public has a scale when you walk out. It's like in the middle before you walk out of the double-sided doors. It's hilarious. Interesting. I don't know why. Everybody always goes on it too. Just to like see how much they weigh. Whoa. Whoa. Damn. You guys want to know about the rules of competitive cattle pulling?
Deerfield Fair Adventures
00:19:26
Speaker
Maybe.
00:19:28
Speaker
I went to the fair on Sunday, the Deerfield Fair. I believe it was there 164th give or take. Fair year. I was watching an ox pull. That's fucked up. They've been going. They've been, they've had that fair since there was some dark times.
00:19:51
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Yeah. The, the first of that fair was definitely in, I mean, yeah. There's some other fowlons at that fair. Yeah. There was definitely some, uh, some restrictions that have been lifted. Although you're also talking about central New Hampshire. So that's like,
00:20:15
Speaker
You know, you don't have to worry too much about who's up. It's pretty surprising if you see them anyway. Yeah. Do you know that there's a fat burger in the Congo? That fat burger was probably there before this fucking Deerfield Fair got enumerated. Wait, what? In like,
00:20:39
Speaker
In Shasa? In Africa. Woah. Guess that makes sense. I thought I took a sip of my Coke while it was in my spin drift. Imagine that. Ooh. You're wild. My whole face is numb. There's nothing wrong with it, but you weren't ex- you weren't- that's not what you were expecting, and so, yeah. Oh, real weird. Gah. Gah-lee. Ideal smeejo. Gah. God damn it. Jared, we can go back to your fairy story here.
00:21:09
Speaker
No, I just want to tell I just I see I don't I couldn't I can't figure out if this because there's no central record keeping for For
00:21:21
Speaker
horse pulling and ox pulling. I looked, I couldn't find it. And it seemed like the only, I don't know if this was Google filtering my results by location just because it does shit like that that you don't want it to do. Or if it seemed like mostly it was fairs in the Northeast that do it and maybe it's like not a thing.
00:21:42
Speaker
outside of the Northeast. So, I don't know, Ukrainian listener, you can let us know if the fairs in Ukraine also do this sport. Definitely.
00:21:57
Speaker
Yeah. Ox pulling. There was like 10 teams, uh, different farmers from around like New Hampshire, probably like maybe other States, but definitely New Hampshire. Cause that's where it was. And they have a team of ox, which is like two ox that are yoked together. Uh, with like that wood thing that I think is also called a yoke and they, uh,
00:22:21
Speaker
They hook them up to, and they're all harnessed up and shit, and they hook them up to a little sled, a little skid that they have weights loaded on, and they have these big...
00:22:37
Speaker
cement blocks and each block weighs 500 pounds and they go and then they just, so they put the weight on it. They hook the team of ox to it. And then the, and then the, you know, leader of the farm teamster, I guess, like basically like whips them with a little, with a little whip, go, and they have to pull the sled six feet.
00:23:02
Speaker
to like qualify, to like pass the round. And then they just keep adding 500 pounds every time, you know, until everyone's eliminated. And so I watched, I didn't watch from that. I didn't get there at the beginning. It was long, but I watched long enough to see the end where the winning team hold, whoa, fuck me. I can't remember, 8,500 pounds.
00:23:34
Speaker
You told me 5,500. No, it wasn't 55, it was definitely 85. So that shit was crazy. Okay. That is, I think the rules as I gathered them for competitive catapulting. But then I was like, so 85 seemed crazy to me, I guess, because like it was Oxway, what, like 3,000 pounds?
00:24:04
Speaker
I can't pull like three times my body weight probably if I tried No, I definitely can't can I pull 600 pounds sled probably not yeah, you could probably if you get some like motion going Once you once you get it going you're good
00:24:22
Speaker
Yeah, once you get some inertia or some momentum, what I meant to say. Yeah, so that was, yeah, that was cool. Shout out to whatever those words were. Shout out Pando. Shout out Pando. You probably, yeah. So that was pretty cool.
00:24:46
Speaker
I would like to know if anyone out there knows if there's a central record keeping authority for ox for oxen horse pulling I I There's very inconclusive
00:25:02
Speaker
Data online about what the world record is for the most weight pulled. Yeah, let's go like Romanian ox. That's where they do it. Yeah there's just every every fair has their own record and So I was going through a whole bunch of different fairs and not all of the fairs published their records I was going through a bunch where I was like our record is like eleven thousand, you know, two hundred pounds our record is eighteen thousand and
00:25:29
Speaker
But then there was like other websites that said like the world record is 5,800. And then you're like, well, no, I just saw like better than that. So that's clearly false. Do you Reddit it yet? No, I haven't put it on Reddit yet. That's actually not a bad idea. That's where you find the plug. That's true. It's actually kind of funny how like.
00:25:53
Speaker
Because Google's so shitty now, you can't actually, Google's so fucked up with AI-optimized web pages and everyone just is gaming the algorithm that the only useful thing you can do on Google is just search for a Reddit thread. Yeah, I know.
00:26:13
Speaker
You know, I wanna know like, oh, how do I like, I don't know, change the headlights on like a 2020 Jeep Liberty? I would just look for this fucking, I read a thread about it.
00:26:29
Speaker
How to make those pork chops so good. Oh, fuck yeah, right. I saw the secret, not the secret. I didn't, I still don't understand it, but I did it and it worked is take the pork chops and you soak them in milk for an hour.
00:26:45
Speaker
Oh yeah. Oh yeah. The fuck is that? I don't know what the milk does, but you could even do that. You could even do that like overnight. Like I would, I've, I mean, I usually don't plan far enough ahead to do this, but like you like brine, like me, like chicken or, or, or something like that. And you can put it in like buttermilk or milk and like some seasonings and spices in that milk, like over fucking night. And it's so good.
00:27:15
Speaker
Yeah, I didn't even get it.
00:27:17
Speaker
It has to be like maybe the calcium breaks something down or something. I don't know. They sound like proteins. Does it? It has to. Or else why would it thunderize it? It just does some shit. Indian people have been doing that. Like the chicken that they used to make like tikka masala and stuff always gets like marinated in yogurt. Something to dairy. Something to dairy does to chicken and pork and stuff when you
00:27:48
Speaker
So yeah, that's a good, that's a good hack or I don't even know if it's a hack. It's just a fucking technique. It's a good technique for good cooking. I got a question. How is Russia the biggest landmass on earth? That's looks like it's inhabited and it is also just like one of the shittiest places on earth. Like why didn't look where they are world.
00:28:14
Speaker
Pretty shitty place to live over there, right? Yeah, you're like basically like partially in the Arctic Circle. That's a colon in part of it. So I think we talked about this already, but like without colon and grad or whatever, that like little like exclave of Russia that's like in like Poland or whatever, before they had that and now they have Crimea too, before they had Crimean, I think the colon and grad, they didn't have
00:28:45
Speaker
uh, ocean access in the winter. They had no, uh, old water ports that didn't freeze over in the entire country and a country that big. So like, I dunno, it was like kind of a shitty country. Whoa. Yeah, but it looks like you could just launch down next to Japan.
00:29:10
Speaker
Sure. Russia wraps all the way around and almost touches North Korea. It does touch North Korea actually. It does. Yeah. There's weird North Korean like prison camps in Russia.
00:29:23
Speaker
Yeah, that makes sense now. I always wondered why that was out there. But like, sure, it's a country that big, but like, if you're, if you're in like Moscow, or if you need to get shit from Moscow, it's like, you're like, oh, why don't you just make a city, you know, near Japan? Like, I don't know. That's not how shit works.
00:29:51
Speaker
Um, or I guess me, I mean, that actually might be true. I might be making shit up. Maybe there, there's a port in the sea of Japan that is, what do you call it? That doesn't freeze over in the winter. But I guess I meant like access to the Atlantic ocean. Like they had all their fleet, you know, and you need you to get to like the East coast of America. Like there's, that's not an option, right? Hmm.
00:30:16
Speaker
But uh Yeah, dude, I wish trains didn't take so long or I'll be taking trains all over the place Oh, dude, well trains don't take long as long in other countries, but we just have like a really shitty No, I don't just if I can just stop mad I'm still because they put the freight train to have to go first
00:30:49
Speaker
Yeah they do
00:30:54
Speaker
and then dedicated track for, uh, Braid. America's like, we're not fucking touching that railroad anymore. Nah, well, we just, everyone got cars. I mean, I think it's like a victim of being like, I don't know.
00:31:09
Speaker
I was like, they overrated the planes. I was kind of trolling a Reddit thread over the weekend that was like, somebody was like, hey, what is your, or hey, people, non-Americans of Reddit, what do you imagine every American has in their home?
00:31:27
Speaker
And I was expecting as an obviously as an American reading that to kind of get like being like roasted on some stuff that I'm like Oh, yeah, like they'd be like like a bunch of peanut butter in the in the pantry and I'd be like, yeah, I have that But it was like it was like you all have like garbage disposals in your sink or like you all have air conditioning
00:31:49
Speaker
And I was like, what the fuck is going on? I'm not getting roasted. Everyone's own goaling themselves, being like, yeah, you fucking Americans all have dryers for your laundry. We just put them out on the clothesline. What's wrong with a clothesline? And I'm like, yeah, I value my fucking time. Yeah, go get some fucking money, you poor fuck.
00:32:12
Speaker
Like you Americans have butter that you buy at your grocery store. You can't, you should just churn butter to make your butter. But that was hilarious. And then I think, so that was really funny because I was like, oh, but then I think I realized like, you know, Reddit can be, I mean, the internet's way more accessible than I'm fucking, I get, or access to the internet's probably more affordable to a lot of people than like,
Car Culture vs. Train Usage
00:32:37
Speaker
you know, a dishwasher. So then I was like, oh, just like all the four people out there probably are like poor countries. And then they're just like, they don't realize it.
00:32:47
Speaker
But anyway, that is my long-winded way of getting to because of America's wealth and the fact that everyone can afford a car, or not everyone, you know what I mean. It's reasonable for a family to have one or two cars. The necessity of passenger trains is a lot less here. We're in some countries where people think that a dishwasher is a luxury item.
00:33:12
Speaker
the train or bus or good public infrastructure is seen as more of a public necessity.
00:33:22
Speaker
Yeah, you didn't think we had like deep socioeconomic discourse on this podcast, but we do. Yeah, that are you. Are you ice cubes either? Yeah, you got to buy ice in a bag at the store. It's pretty crazy. Yeah, you got to buy milk bags. Oh, I want to use ice cubes. It's too poor for that. I think they, no, I like to have ice trays.
00:33:43
Speaker
Like in Italy, they don't like water that's cold and stuff. They don't like Shit, that's cold. I don't know why I'm convinced us just because I don't they like culturally don't have access to ice Yeah, I don't know they're different. It doesn't make any sense people get used to like over there to the haters in Italy. They don't even drink Coffee after like dark and it's like bro Stop being a pussy, but they'll have an affogato
00:34:11
Speaker
Yeah, I ever looked at the Maldives on a map. It's just like a bunch of sandbars that have fucking buildings on them. Not crazy. Tiny bench islands. Imagine that, you're just like, yeah, we somehow landed here. All people left Africa and we made it into the ocean on at least the sandbar. It's like people living in Guam. Oh yeah, I mean, like, those countries that are out in like the Pacific Ocean, like,
00:34:41
Speaker
And like Vanuatu, whose elevation above sea level is like one foot, maximum elevation in Vanuatu is like three feet above sea level. And you're like, they're probably pretty pissed about global warming.
00:34:58
Speaker
They're not really causing any of it, and it's like, literally, if the sea rises one foot, our island nation is gone. They should just grow up. Yeah. Put some landfill under it like a good American. Yeah, put that green carpet over the landfill, you'll find. That is true. It's not even there. They're gonna end up like New York City sinking.
00:35:25
Speaker
Oh, dude, we didn't even talk about that. We could talk about that, that New York City was destroyed over the weekend. Yep, it's because it's sinking. The rain washed all of New York into Long Island Sound. Rest in peace, our brothers and sisters from New York City. Oh, I gotta talk. I gotta go over that, actually. I didn't know that. I told you my Long Island game last week. What was that? I said how big Long Island was.
00:35:55
Speaker
Yeah, well Long Island's fine, but New York City's as I understand Just just like a swept over wasteland like you can see like the trees and like, you know like little
00:36:12
Speaker
steel beams sticking up from the mud but but all signs of life and civilization have been erased weird they're not talking about that more i think the fucking crazy part about all this is that there's people there's a video from the subway and i think think like you're in a you're in a city and it's flooding and there's like enough water up on the street level that you can
00:36:39
Speaker
like, you know, up in above your ankles, not above your ankles, you're like at your waist, right? Yeah. There's people down in the subway, which is also rapidly flooding. This person posted a video where it's coming in through the wall. So it all makes a 90. It's just spraying in through the wall. And the person is, they must have zero self preservation because they're just standing there videoing it.
00:37:00
Speaker
That's what I mean. Like, what a... The same kind of dude who gets fired from what you're calling, like, the easiest job. And you're like, how do you fuck this one up? Yeah. It is, like, the same kind of people who are, like, Tik-Toking, an actively flooding subway station, or, like, trying to get on this, like, thinking, like, I'm gonna get on this subway right now to get away from this flooding. Like, you're going underground.
00:37:29
Speaker
The New York subway system is constantly pumping water out because it already like when it's not raining It fills with water feel like a foster was flooding and you're like, you know, or I'm gonna go into the big dig Yeah Yeah, I'm just gonna drive into the tunnels that are underground underwater. It's like the safest place what water famously doesn't go down
00:37:55
Speaker
Actually, that should even happen because I think what's that the third time in the last three years that the whole city is flooded basically Yeah, I actually don't know how much of it really flooded obviously like enough of it Yeah, especially because you want you want to show, you know, like oh there was a hurricane in California like all these East are all these postals postal liberal cities just Getting destroyed by nature
00:38:27
Speaker
Let's see. Look into it. He was a Dietz Pobs. How much of New York was destroyed? There's no quick looking. In any event, probably none.
00:38:52
Speaker
Probably fake news, probably AI generated. Dude, here's the thing, actually. I just said that as a one-off and it immediately sparked a thought in my mind. Like, if you're not at a place, like, I'm like, I'm not in New York. And like, yes, I could drive or like take a bus to New York right now, but I'm not going to.
00:39:14
Speaker
Dude, AI-generated news could just convince you way, you could be like, oh yeah, the entire war between Ukraine and Russia could be AI-generated news, and how would I know the difference? Because I'm not going over there to check.
00:39:36
Speaker
It could all be like during the pandemic when the COVID deniers were posting pictures of like empty hospitals and being like, where's your pandemic now? Where's your pandemic now, bitch? Those are the same people who thought when that emergency broadcast system thing went out yesterday that the
00:40:02
Speaker
It was going to activate something from the COVID vaccine. It was going to activate the COVID vaccine, but it wasn't just going to be that you had like a microchip in you. It was going to be that you had latent Marburg virus, which is a very deadly respiratory virus, I believe. It's like super rare. It only happens really in like equatorial area, like Africa, very rare virus.
00:40:29
Speaker
And they were like, yeah, so everybody who had the shot as soon as they like, you should turn your phone off for two 30 so that you don't get killed by the tone that's going to come out. Oh, my God. I do. It was just I didn't know everybody got that. Oh, dude, it was so it was it was like the first ever test of
00:40:50
Speaker
like the emergency broadcast like what three years well like obviously like the emergency broadcast system like we all remember from like tv when you were in like the radio where it's like this is a test but then obviously it's like people don't listen to radio anymore watch you know actual tv it's like how does that how does this work anymore so i had to figure out a way to be like
00:41:10
Speaker
Alright, if you're watching Netflix, how do we get that message to you? You're using a cell phone, you have a TV like that's just streaming something. And like, so that was a test of it. And it was weird. It was crazy. Like we had, we have TVs in the store that I work at out of that just show like,
00:41:30
Speaker
Um, you know, like marketing shit and there, but their internet connected obviously. And even on those TVs, like the warning came up and I was like, holy shit. You shouldn't actually have, you shouldn't have the ability to do that. I thought I just got it on my phone. It was everything, they tested everything. They would have went over all sources that they can do it through. What's up this side?
00:42:00
Speaker
So marburg virus is a rare but severe hemorrhagic fever. Oh, hemorrhagic. So it's like Ebola. That's a good one to use for it because then you it like if you were to Google pictures of marburg virus, they're probably pretty horrific.
00:42:20
Speaker
I'm pretty sure it's one of those things where, like, if you get it, you just die. Like, I don't think that there's much of a surviving. I do always appreciate with all this, like, you know, like crazy Q shit and I call that. They're good at, like, giving you, like, enough weird specificity.
00:42:40
Speaker
that it makes, I think that that's what gets a lot of people to believe it is like, they're not just like, oh yeah, there's like a, the COVID vaccine contained a latent virus. And there's a tone that the, you know, thing is going to emit. They're like, no, like that would be, you know, that might've been enough. But then when you get to the point, like, no, it's Marburg virus. And, you know, like, then you're like, oh, okay. Like, how do you all know all this?
00:43:15
Speaker
I mean I think that's I mean it's funny too because like
00:43:23
Speaker
What's the end game there? They were like, yeah, let's do this thing where everyone... You know what would be great for the US economy right now? If 60% of people suddenly died, that would be great. It's gonna be higher than 60%, especially if it's just people who got the first shot. That's gotta be close to 90. Yeah, that would solve everything.
00:43:52
Speaker
Oh, it's just so that the chosen ones can live and then there'd be a new world order. Yeah.
00:44:01
Speaker
So the chosen ones, their whole shtick, their whole thing. Yeah, I know. No, no, no, no, no. The real chosen ones. Their whole thing is they don't work. They rely on us to work for them to make money. So why would they want to kill all of the people who do the work? Steve Jobs Inc. are not us Steve Jobs. He's extremely dead.
00:44:26
Speaker
So Nate's thinking of fried burgers. The tone. The tone actually brought Steve Jobs back to life as well. That would be a nightmare. His latent Marburg virus brought him back to life. Oh dude, the Marburg virus combined with his cancer and created like a zombie. Zombie Steve Jobs.
00:44:50
Speaker
who would just hate Apple now. You would be like, what the, what did you do to my boy? Didn't take enough acid. Right. I mean, I'm just surprised that there's a pop like, even if the people who really thought that that was gonna give everybody Marburg virus, even if that's like 0.05% of the population, that's still too many people.
The Allure of Conspiracy Theories
00:45:18
Speaker
I mean, so, so then that's, yeah, that's the thing is like, okay. So I, so I appreciate that these conspiracies often get like hyper specific in a way that you're like, Ooh, cause that, cause that's kind of what I like to do when I tell lies is like you put, you sprinkle in some details that like.
00:45:35
Speaker
You're like, oh, well, well, if it weren't true, you wouldn't be that specific. Um, but then you have to, but, but then because you've been specific, you get people to gloss over the like, let's think about this critically. Is there a sound that can activate a virus? Like think, let's think about this. A noise that makes of a latent virus suddenly like
00:46:06
Speaker
Obviously no. There's a sound that can make you shit your pants. Why can't there be a sound then? Didn't Myth Busters keep on that? Everybody's seen that episode of South Park. Yeah, the brown note. I love Myth Busters. Yeah, Myth Busters was dope.
00:46:27
Speaker
That dude Adam Savage has his own, um, YouTube channel where he's still bust myths. He really does it. When he like build stuff, people are like, can you build a thing? And he's like, I can try. And then he does it. That guy's got it figured out. He's just doing it for the love of the game now. It's like, RIP Grant Amahara. Yeah. Yeah. RIP. He's done.
00:46:58
Speaker
What's the Red Hat girl doing? She was in some commercial with the other dude. Recently. I think it was like a Tide commercial. Carrie Byron. What is she up to? Just making myth to bust? I don't know. Just creating your own problems to solve now. Wait, who?
00:47:26
Speaker
The Redhead woman who was in Myth Busters? Oh, yeah. This is pretty bad that none of us remember her name. That's Carrie Byron. Oh, okay. You just said that, didn't you? Yeah. What about, uh, what do you stop thinking about Congress? Forry, the other guy? Forry guy who kind of looked like he could be like a lead singer, a Nickelback, or a Creed. Yes, he was in a commercial with her recently. Hmm.
00:48:00
Speaker
You had about the dude who looks like a walrus. Is he still alive? Yeah. Jamie Hynum. Jamie. There you go. He's still alive. He's gotta be. He's got a beret on somewhere. Oh. I'm sure there are no pictures of him not wearing a beret. Hmm. Adam, this is peculiar. Shut up, Jamie. Jamie.
00:48:31
Speaker
I watched a thing where he said that the, um, Holocaust didn't happen. I saw that too. And if I haven't just said that the hardest thing that they wanted to do is throw a grenade and they were never actually able to do it. So instead of buying like a frag grenade and throwing it, they built a grenade out of C4.
00:48:53
Speaker
Oh my God. Oh, like they weren't, like they were never allowed to acquire a grenade. Correct. But they were always able to use C4 because the bomb squads wanted to do it for like practice. Yeah. They wanted to be able to play with it, but they were not allowed to have a grenade. So they just made one. They just anarchist cookbook their own grenade. Hell. I mean, they just shoved a bunch of C4 into a piece of metal. Yeah. I mean, that's, I do.
00:49:24
Speaker
Allegedly, of course, we don't know how to do that. Yeah, we don't know that you pour gasoline on styrofoam. Yeah, we have no idea how to do that.
00:49:38
Speaker
My buddy tried to fly home from Atlanta with, so he works for a company that makes signs. But he goes to all those trade shows where you're just like, oh, there's just somebody who sells homemade nut butter next to somebody who sells those covers that go on your gutters that keep the leaves from coming in. Just those weird ass trade shows. He goes to those.
00:50:05
Speaker
And he got all this free fertilizer from like a home grow company. Oh, they had a clever name and I can't remember it now. Shit, give me one sec. But anyway, he got all that free fertilizer and tried to bring it home. And apparently,
00:50:31
Speaker
Oh my god. He was like, so he sent me to take off his heels. He was like, look what I got. Oh, it's called re, re, re fertilizer. Get it?
00:50:50
Speaker
Anyway, uh, so he got a bunch of samples of that and tried to bring him home and he said, or he was like, yeah, these, this is sick. Cause he's like starting to try out homegrown. And then, uh, and then he texted me like that, like a half hour later and was like, well, the TSA took it. And I was like, and then I was like, dude, I didn't know you were flying home with that. Uh, you def like, you definitely can't pick fertilizer or plain cause the exact, because the ammonium nitrate and he was like, yeah.
00:51:17
Speaker
The TSA guy told me it was like the first thing ever to be banned from planes. Oh God. He hasn't been able to bring that on planes for like 100 years. I was like, Sir, why does your bag have a bomb in it? Yeah, what is going on here? Jesus Christ.
00:51:43
Speaker
That's fucked up though, because your friend probably didn't really get his balls busted for that that bad. But if you try to go through with a fucking open water bottle, they pulled her gun on you. Oh, yeah. That's for sure, dude. They're like, you dummy, you can't bring a main component for a fertilizer bomb on this airplane.
00:52:04
Speaker
And walks through with a water bottle and they're like, you know, the fucking logic. I met him. He's the homie that went to the Celtics game with us. Oh, I forget what that I forget what that guy even looks like. I remember. He looks like a unibomber. Yeah, he's got like unibomber, like the child of the unibomber. And they kind of look like the guy from the like the actor that plays McLovin. But like nowadays,
00:52:35
Speaker
Uh, I don't know. What did that guy look like now? Uh, man, your friend can't ever listen to this. Jeff, we thought you were cool, dude. Oh, jeez, Jeff. He does listen. My name's Jeff. Uh, I don't know the other guy, dude.
00:52:56
Speaker
They never talked about the other friend. The other Jeff that was already there. It's all about Greg Mills. It's all good. We love you, Jeff. It's all good, bro. What about Alex Jones, bro? Make him listen. I've told them all. No.
00:53:20
Speaker
Yeah. He's got a kid and you work. Look at me and Paul, we're fucking doing it right now. He's not making excuses, Jared.
00:53:33
Speaker
He's just, it's hard for him to squeeze between work and his kid. It's hard for him to find. And, and, and listening to Alex Jones's podcast. Being Alex Jones. On time. Being Alex Jones's body double when Alex Jones appears in public. Yeah, that's pretty tough. It's a full-time job. Being hardcore Alex Jones.
00:54:00
Speaker
I mean, but that's not really an excuse to aid in a night. We both have a job and kids. Yeah. That fucking bullshit. That dude probably rides in his car for 40 minutes a day. Bang out a whole episode. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. I want to hear this. I want to hear any excuses. All right. Well, which of your friends listen? I don't fucking know. Probably none of them.
00:54:26
Speaker
You guys, I thought that was true. I do listen every week. You guys, I haven't listened to the past few episodes. You've been busy having a kid going to work.
00:54:47
Speaker
Now I'm doing the poll and I just post some ghosts. There you go. Well, at least one of us is still committed to this. No, dude, we just know it's good. We go, Hey, that's fire right there. Don't even need the list.
00:55:05
Speaker
Uh, it's a lot of what he's saying. There's a lot of that. Oh, I remember. Fuck shit. If I have to text you to take it down and edit something out. Now we don't do any editing for everybody. Listen, there's zero editing. We've never, we've never. Well, audio quality tech goes into it. Yeah. Um,
00:55:38
Speaker
No, I just, I don't know. I'm driving a lot. Driving a lot these days. Podcasts, nice. You know what? I've been through the airports, guys, this time. Nothing was weird. How weird is that? Like every, like, it was just the smoothest airport, huh? People were just normal. I hope that's true next week. You also flew on a, you flew on a Monday, or at least in on a Monday, which is like the best day to fly.
Smooth Sailing at the Airport
00:56:06
Speaker
Yeah, and then out late Tuesday night.
00:56:09
Speaker
Yeah, make my sense. Flying on like midweek out of Pittsburgh was probably the worst. What are you flying to Paul? Uh, Florida. Nice. Oh, fuck. When am I watching those chicken? Best country in America. The 13th, uh, the 14th to the 16th. There's only two of them now, right? Yeah. Let's go. All right. That's fine.
00:56:41
Speaker
They got exponentially easier to take care of. They just take care of themselves now. Taking care of is going down to visit my brother. Nice dude. You gotta bring the baby on the plane. It ain't bad. Hope for the most yet surprisingly smooth.
00:57:06
Speaker
We got some like headphones. Maybe she'll watch some TV. Nice. Yeah, hell yeah, brother. That's awesome. Just gotta put cocoa melon on. Fuck cocoa melon. We're a Bluey family. Bluey. Bluey's good. That is good. I watched that last year at some point. I was like, this is a good show.
00:57:31
Speaker
Gotta put Ms. Rachel on. Ms. Rachel. She's cool. All that little kid stuff is pretty cool, actually, when you look into it, you're like, oh, this takes my mind off of things. Yeah, that's definitely something. I'm a little parent would say, uh, my one plan is fucking raw and like crazy now. You only have one left.
00:57:56
Speaker
No, I have three. Oh, I have one little tiny one that I never uppotted because it got chewed down to just like a bass stun by the rabbits. And that one bounced back and I grew like two tops. It's probably got like a fucking
00:58:14
Speaker
gram and a half on it, maybe an eighth. Then I've got one big plant that's maybe a two ounce plant. That one is in good shape, looks good, smells good. Everything about it is good. It's only got one little tiny spot of rot that I was going to cut off. It's down on like a lower that just had a leaf that got folded onto the bud.
00:58:36
Speaker
And then the other one, bro, the whole top is just fucking turning mushy gray. Oh, Jesus Christ. They got Botrytis out the ass, dude. Yeah, it's been so wet for the last fucking month, basically. Pause.
00:58:52
Speaker
Yeah, that was nice when I was up there. Actually, I was like, damn, it's not even cold out here. No, you missed it. It was like the week before it was cold and wet. And we didn't have the sun for a week. Oh, Jesus. And it rained or was like wicked foggy every day. So the plant just started rotting and just got worse and worse. I'm gonna let it grow out and see if I can just trim all that shit off of it and get maybe like quarter ounce or something. But
00:59:22
Speaker
Whatever. Make some butter out of it. If I can give it away to somebody with the caveat, then it's probably got mold in it. Yeah. Just give it to your neighbor. Here you go, dude. This definitely didn't have moldy butt in it. It'll be okay. Dude, you're good. Fine. Yeah, nothing to worry about.
00:59:45
Speaker
I think before I go to dry it, I'll probably cut the fucking real shitty spots off of it before I hang it. Probably should probably do it now, but enough. What are you gonna do?
01:00:04
Speaker
I'm just assuming that, like, almost that whole plant's gonna be useless, so I'm more and more focused on the other one, which I have actually done nothing to either. Kinda stripped it a little bit the other day. Not even stripped it, I just took off the dead leaves. Oh, damn. The bears are winning. Heh. Yeah, by a lot. It's like 21 to 11 or something, right? 27-14. That's a great update right there, Jared.
01:00:29
Speaker
give us a score what is the score 21 14 27 14 all right 18 seconds left in the third what'd you do hop on twitch you saw god damn dude I can't fuck I'm gonna Amazon Prime now I'm fucking now I'm just thinking about fucking
01:00:52
Speaker
Getting some chicken wings tomorrow at some point. Chicken wings? What, this chicken wing spot? Addictivity. Public chicken wings? Wings. No, dude. Wingstop. Public chicken wings aren't bad. Wingstop's way better, though. Yeah, wingstop. Rules. You get bone-in or boneless? I get bone-in, of course. Question. Come on, dude.
01:01:16
Speaker
I mean a bone-in wing obviously, but I'm not saying I'm gonna send a boneless wing home. No. You gotta go bone in. I agree. I agree with you. Just saying. It was just a question. Didn't mean nothing by it.
01:01:38
Speaker
Just regular buffalo. So good. Buffalo, like a buffalo, like a weird barbecue. We just had wings the other day actually last week. What'd you think? They were fucking fantastic. We get wings from this place called the Eaglebrook Saloon. Okay. You can get them extra crispy. So they take them out and they saw something, they throw them back in. Fucking mad good.
01:02:07
Speaker
super crispy and crispy they're not they're like the ones from um that titty place we used to go to that's not really a titty play hat tricks the clothes titty place implied tits mm-hmm that's so funny like there's definitely tits under that hoodie
01:02:34
Speaker
Yeah, that wasn't elevated hooters. That's so funny. It's definitely boobed somewhere under there. So I'll have the French dip. Oh man, that's so fucking funny. Did I miss that place? The food was actually relatively good. Right? It was actually good food. Going to have like 50 chicken wings.
01:03:03
Speaker
Yeah, and everybody would feel terrible the next morning. Goddamn good. So fucking good. Shout out to the Wendy's bathroom. Oh, God. Was that Wendy's or was that Denny's? It was in between both. It was a Wendy's and a Denny's. That was a Denny's, I think. I think it was a Denny's they went into. Yeah. Oh, my God. Imagine having to shit so bad you can't even make it the last minute and a half.
01:03:34
Speaker
Yeah. That also means it's not like you're, it's not like you're making into the, into the stall and you're like, all right, you're making the stall and it's one of those like, just act as those out into the restroom. It's just, it's shards of glass and asphalt. There's a snowing out. Jesus Christ.
01:03:57
Speaker
Oh man. That was too funny. That is so fucking funny. Dude was gone like 45 days now and then just busted her right into the parking lot almost flipped the SUV. Oh my god. That is so fucked. I uh wings will do that to you no matter what. I'll tell you that man.
01:04:21
Speaker
Yeah, right now and then, those wings look extra. Especially the night before you split 50 wings between three people and have a fucking foil pitcher as a beer. Yeah, I think it's almost more related to that much Bud Light, or whatever it was. Bud White and Johnny Walker? Oh yeah, I forgot he crushes those fucking scratches. Yeah, you found out about rocks. A cesspool after that.
01:04:50
Speaker
Nothing good is coming out of it.
01:04:56
Speaker
I, yeah, I think I'm just going to get wings and just keep eating them. Anybody else, that's like, dude, I would get wings once in a week and I'm like, man, I can't wait till I can do this again next week. Oh yeah. Dude, wings are, it's actually insane how good wings are and how often I wish I could eat them. Yeah, honestly. I like every time, like when can I eat these again? So good.
01:05:24
Speaker
Paul, what do you think? I love wings. Big wing guy. Big wing guy. So good. Ah, nice crispy, nice crispy skin on a wing.
01:05:41
Speaker
If I do get boneless wings, I don't want the little shitty chicken nugget ones. I just want somebody to give me like a full chicken tundra like a tender. Yeah, that's tough. Soaked in sauce. Um, I mean, yeah, like I'm, you know, I used to, I used to fuck with like a wings over. Wings over order wings over Springfield was tight.
01:06:03
Speaker
Yeah, right? Like, you know, you get that like West Texas Mesquite, maybe like a golden barbecue. Damn. Now, you're looking that was suspect about wings over as you'd get hairy wings. Oh, fuck that. It was like they got like the cheapest chicken wing possible. So it had been, I mean, it was wings over. It was de-feathered, but not that well. That would fuck me up.
01:06:31
Speaker
Get it every now and then. They're fried, come on. Now's a wing place in fucking Springfield.
01:06:40
Speaker
Uh, well, there's a bunch of them, wings over Springfield, wings over Worcester, wings over Brookline, Brookline. I don't think that was still the story of the street from wings. Oh, Brookline. Weaver Brookline was just a fucking. Amazing. Yeah. I looked up that BU campus again the other day. I'm like, man, there's no team besides the soccer team they had. Still vote, still vote that I would love to go there.
01:07:07
Speaker
You see that they're finally putting something into the Great Scott. And it's a, it's a Taco Bell Cantina. Nice. That's the phrase that rules. They figured out the only thing I can't be that mad about. Oh yeah. Now you can go and get a margarita made out of Bob last. I mean, I want that.
01:07:33
Speaker
Not happy, but I'm not mad either. Not like Taco Bell closed Great Scott down. Great Scott closed. Yeah, Taco Bell is kind of a piece of shit. Great Scott. Taco Bell took advantage of an opportunity to provide us with frozen Baja Blast margaritas. So that's all it is? It's a bar.
01:07:59
Speaker
Oh, it's like a Taco Bell that has a liquor. Yeah. If the Taco Bell, you can order normal stuff on the menu, but then they do have some like cocktail, if you could call it that, alcoholic beverages. There's one in Vegas where I used to live. I don't know if I mentioned that.
01:08:21
Speaker
that you lived in Vegas? Yeah. You ever stay at the Mandalay Bay? We're not going to talk about that night. He was an arms dealer for the Saudis.
01:08:37
Speaker
Look into that, Paul. They never explained where all those guns came. Look, he had them displayed around like he was an arms dealer. There was no, um... Did you see the photo of him fucking laying there? Yeah. Pretty fucking sick. Who? What are you talking about? Vegas Strong. Out of the gun, the shooter? Allegedly. If it was even him. Bus back.
01:09:07
Speaker
And yeah, let's go back. What the hell? All the name right now. The FBI like seized his apartment or whatever. And then like randomly. They're just like, yeah, we didn't find anything. Yeah. They were like, no, there was something in there. And then it like all burned down. No way. All the evidence.
01:09:29
Speaker
No way. Yeah, there was some sketchiness. I don't remember if it was burned down. It was like, oh, oh, we had all this evidence we took from this apartment. It was on a truck and the truck like fell into a river. There wasn't that
Vanishing Evidence Mystery
01:09:40
Speaker
either. It was like some extremely sketchy FBI shit. Hmm.
01:09:52
Speaker
Well, sounds like Devan Pattig. Well, that's how they, Devan Pattig. His brother went to jail for child pornography. Well, they just sound like a bad family. What the fuck? I mean, we probably did it, but also I feel like that's the way that you like get people now. Like who didn't actually do anything. It's like the FBI just puts kiddie porn on your laptop and then like, well, there's kiddie porn there. You're going to jail.
01:10:19
Speaker
Yeah, he was an arms dealer for the Saudis ball. They framed him. Look into it. But also, you have that, that damn law on your stage tried to claim responsibility for the shooting. Claiming paddock was Abu Abdul Baral on Ricky. Wow. Stated that he had converted to Islam six months prior to the terrorist attack. Holy shit. They didn't say that. I didn't know that. It's new news.
01:10:50
Speaker
But then the United States law enforcement said there was no evidence of this. Yeah. They're trying for the evidence. Anywhere. That every, every, everything they turned, they're like, yeah, we didn't find anything. How crazy is that? Oh, Paul, you know, you got to look up, look up what he had for his last, uh, what he ordered on the room service meal. I'm interested to see what that was.
01:11:19
Speaker
If, if, imagine if they, you order boneless wings from room service right before you're about to fucking save yourself out and they come up and they're just shit little fucking small boneless wings. You're like, Oh my God. You know what makes me so mad. I'm going to shoot up a concert. You know what Kenny Chesney's coming out. This is over. It's fucking done.
01:11:52
Speaker
Jared, you gotta make a joke about it now. Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
01:12:20
Speaker
This guy just keeps bringing cockroaches. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck. Holy shit, dude. That's a lot of guns. That's a good amount of guns going in there. That's odd. These bags are all 400 pounds and really bulky. Fucking room service goes in there to like clean the room while he's not in there like, oh,
01:12:52
Speaker
We'll just move this gun over. There's just dust the guns off. Yeah, yeah. They do that thing like when you leave all your fucking toiletries on the counter just all crazy and they like, yeah, organize them nice for you. Oh my God.
01:13:15
Speaker
He just looked like a middle-aged guy with a lot of luggage going up to his room. That's what the deputy chief had to say about it. What about the fucking, um... What about his last room service meal? Don't say. That's bullshit. Part of the conspiracy. That's fucking horseshit, dude. They can't list that. That's illegal now.
01:13:46
Speaker
His wings. Well, I think his brother, his brother, Bruce Paddock, definitely had CP on his computer. What the hell? Look at this guy. Drop it in the chat. Try to find his last meal. Look at how crazy that guy looks.
01:14:11
Speaker
Wow. Yeah, of course. It looks like he's the pawn store guy on meth. Yeah. Wow. He really does. That's a great description. The even paddock man. This dude was loaded too. Didn't you have like millions of dollars? I guess that's what you do. And you just have all the money is when you're like, all right, time to
01:14:40
Speaker
Was up with these people right? He ordered a meal. See this is not too hard guys. This is easy Angus double burger with tool for overloan and on brioche Added caramelized onions to that burger You've seen the same receipt. I'm seen Burger a bagel potato soup bottle water two Pepsi's and pellegrino. Yeah
01:15:05
Speaker
You think it was the Pepsi that sent him over the edge, son? It's like how long does a walking coke fly? Actually, he's not okay. I think the point is, it's an order for two. He was there. Allegedly. What's that about? Makes you think, right? Look into it. It was Abu Abdu'l al-Baghdadi there with him.
01:15:32
Speaker
I do. Imagine coming up with that name. Oh, you didn't see Shane's new special yet, right? No, I did. One of the times we all watched it. Let me watch fucking for an hour or whatever. You got Netflix now though, right? Nope. Oh my God.
01:15:56
Speaker
that the joke he has about Navy Seals being pussies is hilarious. Yeah, that was really good. I liked the abdu-bug-dotty bit, too. That was even funnier. Cried like a dog. Yeah, that was really... I mean, that was like
01:16:20
Speaker
a good joke and also like a pretty faithful retelling of what that speech actually was. Yeah.
01:16:32
Speaker
Guys in nuts. Remember when Trump had, is that who I'm thinking of? Was that the terrorist person that he had killed? He wanted an Obama killing Bin Laden moment where he got to be like, like Obama, like big dick walked out into the Rose Garden and was like Osama Bin Laden's dead. He wanted a moment like that for his presidency and like found whoever that guy was, Baghdadi.
01:17:03
Speaker
But obviously then delivered that speech in the Trump, in the most Trump way possible, which was just like doing bitch comedy on the guy. Yeah. Crying.
01:17:19
Speaker
I just remember people being like super pissed about that. I'm like, I don't understand why. That we killed a well-known terrorist. Oh yeah. I don't know. I think I do remember that being controversial for some reason, but they're like, Oh no, we're going to get into another war. Well, like, yeah, like we went into like,
01:17:43
Speaker
Pakistan to get a, like we didn't tell the Pakistani government we were doing it or so you had to send to get bin Laden and everyone's like, well, that's forever. Fuck those. Yeah. No, I agree. But also like, you know, I'm not allowed to do that. So I would have done the same thing. Oh yeah. I'm not saying it was wrong. I'm just saying like,
01:18:07
Speaker
I gotta tell someone when you're going in their house. Not if they're gonna fucking warn the person.
01:18:14
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. He had a common. I guess the only point I'm making is no one complained then. Everyone was like, yeah, well, you gotta do it. Yeah, you gotta go to Pakistan without telling the Pakistan government, because they would have told them up in London, and I would have boiled it. And then whatever we did, I don't even remember how they got back, Daddy. But everyone was like, what if this isn't? And you're like, uh, kind of the same shit. She deserved it. They both did.
01:18:44
Speaker
Yeah. I do just remember a bunch of my friends were like, Oh, this is terrible that they did that. And I was like, what the fuck are you talking about? All right.
Bush's Famous Blunder
01:19:02
Speaker
Let's wrap it up guys. Give your shout outs. Oh shit. Bush. Oh yeah.
01:19:11
Speaker
Fool me once. Shame on you. Fool me twice. Won't get fooled again. Fool me twice. Can't get fooled again. That's a saying in Texas, just in case anybody was wondering. Yeah, a saying down in Texas. Fool me once. Shame on you. Shame on the shamer. Fool me twice.
01:19:39
Speaker
Can't get fooled again. Shout out to the 1993 episode of Dinosaurs where Robbie, the older brother dinosaur, takes steroids to try to get girls. And then the steroids make him violent and he gets this like hot girl, but then he like abuses her and she dumps him and he learns a lesson about why you shouldn't do steroids.
The Shoe Thrower's Legacy
01:20:06
Speaker
Okay. I like that.
01:20:09
Speaker
I got a second shout out. Shout out to the guy who threw the shoe at George Bush. Ooh, yeah. He's got like a statue in like Afghanistan or Iraq or whatever. No, he doesn't. Yeah, there was like a statue. You got like murdered for that dude. There was a statue of the shoe, I'm pretty sure. Shout out to... Shout out Pando's second cousin.
01:20:39
Speaker
Ooh. I think his second cousin, right? And shout out Kevin James. Hmm. All right, that's a pod boys. Take that. You take that.
01:20:59
Speaker
Alright. That is the end of the show. We will be here next week and always for you. Join the reddit. Subscribe.download. We love you, fuck working for the man and fuck day jobs, one day we will be free birds.
01:21:56
Speaker
We like, we like to want it