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Huffing Ali Baba Ether
93 Plays6 months ago
We now import an export legal ether on amazon and walmart . cam
it does not smell or anything
Go to reddit an join Dudes r us before we leave this earth
Bye
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Transcript
Welcome and 50th episode milestone
00:00:02
Speaker
Welcome to Dudes R Us.
00:00:39
Speaker
Now let's start the show. I'm not looking at, uh, like where are you? Where we're on. Podcast starts now. 50 50th episode, 50 weeks. Is it really? Yep. 50 50th episode. We got stood up by Panda. You son of a bitch. Number 50. What's his address?
00:01:09
Speaker
You want to say it live? Yeah, he stood as he stood as up, dude. I mean, I didn't really ask if he would come back for 15. If I'm being honest, I forgot. All right, back to the Alibaba ether. What else could we could you did you look at Amazon to order it yet? All I saw in there was like break cleaning fluid.
00:01:32
Speaker
hmm dot three you definitely get like alpha a czar had diethyl ether but i think you let's see used to make my own permanent ink for a graffiti and dot three break fluid was the key to making it permanent no idea why
Diethyl ether and Carhartt clothing humor
00:02:03
Speaker
Uh, 300 grams is only $696. I'm out. How much do you break that out to?
00:02:27
Speaker
Uh, I don't know. I don't know what a dose of ether is. I have a feeling it's like chloroform where you just need to basically snort some of it. Yeah. For some reason you would serve it in like, like a nitrile glove, like the pinky of it, twist it up, soak something in it. Then you have like a glove full and you just keep huffing the glove. Yeah. You put the glove, like, uh, stretch the glove from like your chin to like the bridge of your nose.
00:02:56
Speaker
Yeah. You just kind of got like a feed bag of ether. Well, yeah, that's actually now I'm doing the motion of it. It would be like a perfect nitrile glove would be perfect to just keep sticking your nose into and have like a clear. Yeah. Well, I think it probably would volatize very fast because it's a highly flammable liquid. So you probably, if you poured it into the glove, it would probably dry out really fast.
00:03:27
Speaker
versus if you poured it on a rag, you might get a little more. What about a piece of cotton? I think that's how they used to do it. They'd put it in. They'd soak like a big old cotton ball. Yeah, because that shit's fucking absorbent, right? You know, it'd be the worst to put it on is like a fucking. Carhartt shirt would just bounce off.
00:03:55
Speaker
Be eyes right off. Ever accidentally fall asleep in your Carhartt shirts? This is like a fucking falling asleep with a fucking jacket on backwards. Shit's stiff as hell. You're like, fuck, did I fall asleep at the dentist? Fall asleep in a fucking shirt of Velcro, basically. Yeah, I always go softer shirt change out before.
00:04:26
Speaker
Oh yeah. I mean, you gots to try not to sleep in a shirt, but it does happen every now and then, you know? Yeah. I mean, kind of, I don't really know, but no shirt for me, just always get fucking,
00:04:54
Speaker
I don't know. I always fucking sleep weird without that. Oh, dude, I'm, uh, I'm like a boxers only sleeper, generally speaking.
Hotel experiences and air travel woes
00:05:05
Speaker
Dude, that fucking hotel I was in last, last week was nice, dude. And I missed, did I say they had an espresso machine in it? I don't remember if you did, but that's dope. How dope is that? A coffee machine in the room you actually use? Yeah. That's like shit. That's,
00:05:23
Speaker
No random Indian dude opened up your door in the middle. Yeah, I was all I was all respect. It was like When Hilton or Marriott it's like their special collection when they just buy the nicest oldest hotel in them wherever it is and then they just yeah logo on it Yeah, I think
00:05:44
Speaker
You think that dude thinks about that moment where he just walked in on the underwear crushing chocolate? What's up, boss man? Hey, boss man. This is my room. You're in my room. This is my... Hey, boss man, get up. Probably. Every time he goes to a hotel now, probably fucked him up. It's like there might be a fat white dude eating chocolate behind this door.
00:06:13
Speaker
Hey boss, man. Just colonizing his hotel room. Yeah, dude. I mean, he's an Indian guy. So he just plows right through it. If it was one of us, obviously would still like you do, but count it. You know what I mean? Yeah. Indian guys. Just another day. That dude came from his house where there was like 18 people sharing his bedroom. Yeah. He was like, Oh, only one person in here. That's not bad. Oh yeah. This, this is a nice place. There's only one,
00:06:43
Speaker
Random person I share a bit with. I do. Every now and then on like Instagram, I'll get one of those videos where it's like a person showing their routine before they go to bed in a hotel and they go off the logs. Yeah, it's insanity. And all I was thinking to myself was like, damn, if I had just done that,
00:07:12
Speaker
I could have just been, I could have ate my chocolate in peace. I mean, I always flip the fucking square lock and do the other one. I'd never add locks to it though. Yeah. I mean, that's an, I'm not, that's never stay in hotels. Yeah. I'm assuming the KGB isn't trying to kill me. And if they are like putting a tiny round bandaid over the peephole, not stopping them.
00:07:42
Speaker
Like they put like eight different, eight different locking mechanisms and like little trip alarms and stuff around their door. And I'm like, they really wanted to get to you. They would just cut the door frame out. That's fair. That's crazy that people do that. That's fucking nuts. Yeah. Those ones are, those ones are like, I don't even know. I don't know if they're rage bait or if I bet there are like a couple of genuinely that paranoid people, but you're like, don't travel.
00:08:13
Speaker
Yeah, exactly, dude. Staying like a decent hotel. I mean, I was staying in a Hilton. Yeah, I mean, that's just a freak accident. That was a fucking Hilton Garden Inn, right? Hey, no, it wasn't, dude. It wasn't the Garden Inn. It was the one downtown.
00:08:40
Speaker
Uh, yeah, that one's anything can happen there. Had a whole fucking homeless encampment outside of it. The valet was like, just ignore them. Every hotel's just like a, has a shanty town outside now. I like the valet trying to tell me I should just ignore everybody who's just standing on the corner screaming at me. I was like, that's kind of hard. Kind of thought this was a nice hotel, not some fucking shit hole.
00:09:09
Speaker
Yeah, I pulled up to a few of those where I'm like, God damn it. This fucking hotel actually sucks. You think it's a valet, but it's just a homeless dude and takes off in your car? Surprisingly, it's only happened in Pittsburgh where I've gotten there. I'm like, God damn, this hotel sucks. Yeah, don't miss Pittsburgh. Everything else looked good about it. Nope. But no catfished.
00:09:37
Speaker
Hey boss, man. What's up, man? It's you at the classic Indian passive aggressiveness. There's a, um, hair's colored on like red or some shit, dyed red for no reason. Just as beard is dyed red. There's a line in the book fear and loathing in Las Vegas where he's
00:10:04
Speaker
in a bathroom at a bar and he accidentally spilled acid on the sleeve of his Pendleton shirt and this other dude's in there sucking the acid out of the sleeve of his shirt and then he saw some
00:10:17
Speaker
Some like square white guy comes in and sees them doing it. And then like the punchline to it is that that guy for the rest of his life is going to be afraid to go into bathrooms because he might see two speed freaks sucking each other's shirt. And now I just think that that's what that Indian guy assumes, except for white dude eating chocolate. Yeah, exactly. He's going to watch Big Daddy and be like, oh, this all makes so much sense.
00:10:45
Speaker
Oh man. That's nuts. I don't miss traveling at all. I was thinking about that the other day. Dude, when I was on a flight two weeks ago, there was a, I didn't say that about the two middle aged men fucking fighting. Oh yeah. Texted that to you guys. Yeah, dude. Putting his knees up, pushing back on the seat. I was like, dude, you gotta just take it. They fucking reclined for a reason.
00:11:14
Speaker
Yeah, anybody who gets upset about that, it was just ridiculous. Fucking chair has a recliner in it. Yeah, dude, then you fucking recline, then you'll be fine. Or just not, and you'll be still fine. You'll still be fine. Yeah, you just got to deal with it. That's just life, man. Pay for another seat. Yeah, exactly. Go on, bro. I mean, definitely just pay for the leg room.
00:11:35
Speaker
Uh, if it's going to be an issue for you, but yeah, just go fucking sitting in the whole fucking three hours with your knees against it. Like a bitch put in your mind. Vice be like, this
Spicy food challenges
00:11:48
Speaker
is not real. If it bothers you that much, that's a big problem. Yep.
00:12:01
Speaker
Just kicking the back of the seat. I was so triggered. I was like, guys, come on, grow up. Those are those people that guy he's like, he's like one fucking moment away from just going full like ragdoll dragged off the plane. Like, I am a sovereign citizen. Oh, yeah. Please don't do that to people, though. There is no environment that just turns normal sane people into absolute fucking psychopaths more than like
00:12:30
Speaker
people on a plane after like a three hour delay. Oh god. I don't know, dude. One time I watched an entire James Bond movie before we took off and that was pretty Yeah, I would have freaked the fuck out about that. It was pretty pretty loud out loud just in my head out of my god damn it. I like watched half the movie fell asleep for 20 minutes woke back up finished the movie and then I look out the window and I'm like
00:12:59
Speaker
Holy shit. Made it to the fucking D icing pad. What is going on right now? That's like mentally like the, uh, I don't know if you were like, I had to drive my brother's house once for something and he was to live two hours away. Um, and then I was like, you know, whatever hang out there, drive home. And I was an hour away from my house when I realized that I had like left something there that I needed.
00:13:25
Speaker
And you have to drive back an hour back to his house and then still have two hours of driving after that. That's that. That's those vibes where you're like, you like woke up and you're like, we haven't even left yet. Fuck. Yeah, I'm with you, dude. I'd kill someone. Yeah. If there was a choice, if like the stewardess came up to you and they were like, you can be home right now.
00:13:52
Speaker
but you have to kill someone on the plane with your hands or, or it's going to be another six hours, but you'll be home and everyone lives and be like, kill someone. I don't care. You want to pick for me or, or do I get to pick? Dude, I'm just always in the option of where I'll just take another flight. Big delay. I'm hopping on another flight to a nearby airport. True. Yeah.
00:14:24
Speaker
I mean, having that option. Yeah. Having like the life freedom to be like, you know what? I don't need to do this today. I'm just going to stay here another day and deal with this tomorrow. Oh, that sucks. Staying another day. That's the last option. Take another flight. Maybe it takes off an hour. But yeah, I guess I just mean like, yeah, I've kind of gotten over the like, Oh, I have to, uh, this like,
00:14:53
Speaker
The like plane law they like funnel you into where you're like, yeah, we're just going to be here for 11 straight hours. It's going to be fine. Like you can break out of that. I'm going to sleep in the airport. Yeah.
00:15:07
Speaker
You don't have to sleep in the airport, people. Attention, terminal, we are delayed four hours, but please don't go far because if we do fix the plane, we're going to leave with or without you. So don't leave to like eat food or, you know, explore the city you're in. You must stay within your shot. Deep plane.
00:15:35
Speaker
That's I I don't ever wish anything on it if you have to stay in the plane that's absolutely horrific Yeah, Elon fix that fix planes Elon yeah, please do something give us Starlink for planes Please I saw a
00:16:03
Speaker
I went to, uh, Costco today and there is a Tesla dealership down near there. Yep. And I saw a. Cybertruck person like pulled up next to it. And, uh, you know, I wouldn't want to drive one myself, but I think that's like kind of a cool idea. Guy's making some fucking crazy looking thing. I was driving behind that one for like two hours.
00:16:34
Speaker
No, you guys all hate on him, but it's the dumbest I hate on him because it looks fucking retarded. Yeah, but still, at least he's making something different. Every other truck looks exactly the same. The only truck that kind of looked different was the Tundra because it was all like bubbly and shit. And now they redesigned it and it's just square like everything else.
00:16:57
Speaker
And they're not even really square anymore. Cyber truck is like a real square truck, but cyber truck looks fucking crazy. I mean, I would I would sooner say like I there's elements of that that I agree with you, but then I would be like, go back to like, you know, like a mid 90s.
00:17:15
Speaker
design like the old square bodies. Yeah, they're nice. But that is like a fucking floating battleship is what I thought when I saw that. Yeah. Fucking amount of turner in the back of it and you'd be like, you're in Halo. There's that. Yeah, it's like an action driving by the bull horns and the fucking bull holes on it. I guarantee. I mean, there's probably a video that, you know, on his YouTube that explains where those bullet holes came from. They're probably just doing some dumb fucking rich kid shit.
00:17:44
Speaker
Yeah, he like lives in the middle of nowhere in Florida, which didn't make sense, I guess. At least where the Cybertruck was. Didn't make any sense. Well, if I had $100,000, I'd buy one. You wouldn't rather have, would you rather have like a fucking... That would be your first buy of cars?
00:18:14
Speaker
Or would there be something else? I mean, I probably want like an old maybe like an old Land Cruiser. Yeah, exactly. Correct answer. That's exactly the right answer. Not a fucking Cybertruck. Yeah, but I mean, that's like poor people logic. If I had enough money that I could buy an old school Land Cruiser, I would also buy the Cybertruck.
00:18:43
Speaker
That wouldn't be number two either, though. If you had enough money where you could buy as many cars as you want. Why not? Yeah, I mean, you're not like you're not like five Ferraris rich, but you're a guy who could have like, you know, your car that you like to drive and then something stupid. Bro, think of how much cottage cheese you could get before you got that cyber truck. That's true. You could have a whole fridge full of cottage cheese anytime you want. You could have you could pay somebody to come and refill it.
00:19:15
Speaker
Check expiration dates and stuff instead of that Cybertruck. It's true. Way better. Make a point. Way better. Make a good point. You could probably get, I don't know that anyone does this, but you could probably get somebody to do it. Get somebody to load a keg, charge a keg with cottage cheese. Fresh tapped cottage. Shoot that out of Cybertruck.
00:19:46
Speaker
Yeah. Just saying there's better things to waste your. Fuck you money on. Now we're talking. I'm also. Yeah, I think that's probably what I get. You could you could get a Boeing whistleblower murdered. That's true. Fifteen hundred bucks.
00:20:14
Speaker
Not even that expensive apparently cause they did it again. I know they just keep hopping dudes. And they, and like got more creative. Gave him like, gave him like MRSA. That's a good one. Is that something with your blood or something? It's like, uh, uh, it's like basically like the flesh eating virus. Gave him like flesh eating virus in his lungs. Oh God.
Karen Reed trial and conspiracy theories
00:20:41
Speaker
You know that somebody just like sneaked in his room while he was sleeping and like, you know, like sprayed something in his nose while he was well, when he breathed in. And it was just like, all right, 10 days, you're going to wait to go out. The lungs are just going to turn to mush. Got him. Oh, these fucking often a mashed potatoes. Seeing the Karen Reed trial videos is kind of funny because it's I feel like it's got
00:21:12
Speaker
I don't know if it's national news, but around. I think it's gotten like there's like podcasters and like not, you know, podcasters who are talking about it. It's gotten weirdly outside of our little part of part of the state. But then when you see it like they're in can district court and it's just like this is a little tiny fucking shitty court. No, dude, they're they're a denim. They're the denim court. Still small disrespect, dude.
00:21:41
Speaker
Do not disrespect. Yeah. Come on, dude. That's like the first courthouse built in America. No, that's probably why it looks so shitty. It's got like a, it's got like a gold dome. It's a good one. Who is that lady?
00:22:00
Speaker
That's where Socko and Vanzetti were tried in the twenties. Karen Reed, she got drunk and killed somebody and now she's trying to say the police did it or the reverse would be that the police knew she was drunk and took advantage of it. Who was she before? Just some fucking random woman. Okay. The story is that she was like dropping a friend or her boyfriend.
00:22:26
Speaker
Husband may be off at this other person's house. They were all cops. The story that she killed him is that there's a big dent in the back of her car. She was drunk, dropped him off, drove away, came back, dent in the back of her car, said, oh my God, I killed him. And then the other side of the story is that he was a cop and the other cops also hated him. So they killed him and framed her.
00:22:56
Speaker
Okay, I'd be pretty genius. But I mean, it doesn't seem that hard to believe that a drunk person would crash into somebody that they just dropped off. Yeah, reverse. Yeah, I mean, well, I've so I've twice in my life not drunk. Uh,
00:23:19
Speaker
Got been like really excited to have arrived somewhere and accidentally just got out of the car while the keys were still in and while I was in drive. And almost ran yourself over. Not myself, but I did like the one of the times. Not so much than anyone noticed, but like. Would have run over like four people.
00:23:46
Speaker
I mean, slow run over, but I think running over at any speed is pretty bad. Cheesecake factory, just fucking out drive jumping out. So so imagine yourself, you know, you were at you were at Napper Tandy's fucking doing picklebacks all night and you and now you're doing the same situation. Absolutely. I would run over that cop. I admit to it. Cinco de Mayo. Did I do it? No, I don't drink and drive. Shut up.
00:24:15
Speaker
No, just getting out while it's still in drive because you're so excited. Oh, one time was at a. One time was at a Patriots game, so I was I parked like parked at Gillette and we were going to tailgate and I just got really excited to like tailgate and just. Got out of the car and it started rolling into the parking space in front of me and what it just like run over run over some people tailgating. Well, I'm going to say.
00:24:44
Speaker
Is that if it does come out that she was framed by the police, then I'll take it back. But as of right now, I think it's pretty, pretty cut and dry that the drunk person driving around. Yeah. Big ass dent on the back of her car in a broken tail light. Yeah. And not the cops wouldn't know admitted to killing the person. Not that the cops wouldn't know how to stage something like that. But sure. But what did they do? Go out into the parking lot and smash a car up. And then she was just so drunk that she didn't notice it.
00:25:15
Speaker
Yeah, basically. Yeah, it's weird that they've even allowed it to go this off the rails when she's like, No, I did it. That's I think that's the part that to me is the craziest is that she came back to the scene and said, Oh, my God, I kill them. So she like probably felt like she hit something when she was backing up to leave.
00:25:41
Speaker
Yeah, everyone wants to believe in conspiracies right now. I think she's innocent. I ain't gonna be fucking great when the jury and the judge are just like, yeah, you were drunk, and you hit your boyfriend or husband or whatever he was to you. And unfortunately, that's, you know, shit happens, but... Oh man, but everyone wants like a...
00:26:08
Speaker
Everyone wants a, um, I don't know that fucking famous lawyer's name anymore. That TV show. Everyone wants that moment where not Matlock, uh, it's like where the trope of like, you know, the lawyer doing cross and then like, and then like the guilty person is like, hi,
00:26:31
Speaker
I did it cause I loved her. And then it's like, Ooh, like the show that invented that. Uh, but I can't remember what it's called. It doesn't matter. No, it'll be great as if they do find out that it's the cops. They'll just be like an insane. What do you do at that point? You just go in and fire everybody in that. That's what I'm saying. That's why I think it's fun to believe in a conspiracy theory because
00:27:00
Speaker
Oh, Perry Mason have a Perry Mason moment. Everyone wants a Perry Mason moment where the cop is like, the cop is like, he was a fucking rat. And then you're like, and then you're like, holy shit, it's real. But yeah, I mean, if it's real, you definitely have to fire the entire police force like that, which isn't what would happen because like shit like that's happened before. And they're like, it was it was too bad apples.
00:27:29
Speaker
Hey, I wasn't kneeling on his neck. I don't know. Definitely wasn't me. I just stood by and watched him die. Yeah. Um, works anymore, dude. I'll tell you what it's real annoying because, um, they do block the entire street or actually like three blocks on either side of the courthouse in Dedham and they are outside, not outside my apartment, but on the street.
00:27:59
Speaker
Um that overlooks the highway near my apartment every fucking day now Yeah every day just hanging out Free karen reasons just so I i'm not i'm not against obviously not against protesting or anything like
00:28:16
Speaker
protest is good and get a fucking life you losers. So that's, that's where I'm like, tell them Paul that that's where I'm like, okay. But like protesting a person who was drunk driving and killed their boyfriend. Yeah. Well, let's, I mean, even let's say it was like something that was less ridiculous than that. Let's say it was like, but even then you're like, what, how are you just, how are you just not have anything to do? You're here every day. Like what are you,
00:28:46
Speaker
like you aren't, uh, like stay at home, you know, like homemaker or whatever, cause you'd have to be watching kids and you clearly don't have a job. Like what is the deal here? Explain it to me. That's what I, that's what I don't get. Yeah. Somebody with too much time. It's a, it's like a, it's like a grip of them. There's like five groupies that,
00:29:14
Speaker
Every day. Same groupies. It's the dude from the young jerks and... Oh, bro. That dude. He has a fucking live stream every day. That dude used to try to catfish me for information about our job. You guys seen, I finished it last night. I finished Oppenheimer.
00:29:42
Speaker
No, I still gotta watch it. Yeah, I'll watch it. That shit was fire. My, it's the eternal, uh, you know, autism struggle of watching something new or watching the same thing, something I've seen 100 times already. Yeah. So now I'm just wearing a weird leather hat and smoking a pipe and talking to people.
Books, media, and cultural reflections
00:30:08
Speaker
Just citing the bahaga about Gita. Yeah, exactly. I'm going to I think I'm going to try to get into watch that. What is it? I never even knew it. I don't know. I just saw a commercial that Shogun series or something. Yeah. Shogun is really good. I haven't seen the new series, but I saw it's like a remake of like they did in the 70s or whatever. And that one was really good. So I have no reason to believe this one's not even better. But let me know how that is. If you watch it soon.
00:30:38
Speaker
I started reading the book that it's based on. And there's this really ridiculous scene in the beginning where the Dutch guy who shows up or English guy, right? They strip them down and
00:30:55
Speaker
they have a conversation about how he has a very large penis. Listen, which is so funny, because it just reminds me of an episode of South Park where they're like, Oh, American penis so big. That was like the whole gist. And it's a lot. It's a lot of pages. It's not like one reference. It's a lot of reference to it.
00:31:17
Speaker
over and over on chapters the guy who's like house that is uh hosting the pirates is like yes my mother would like to see your penis erect if you could like it's uh it's based on a true story i mean yeah okay what is it what is it about how to sell the
00:31:48
Speaker
I mean, if you were a Rasmus who like, um, I don't really know the premise of how he ends up in Japan, end up in Japan, and then everyone makes a story out of your life. You're going to be like, yeah, you know, the first thing that happened is like, there was like seven days where they just admired my penis. It was pretty weird, but they were like, wow, you have like the hugest penis we've ever seen. Like,
00:32:15
Speaker
And then they just brought me around to all the women in Japan and they had me show them their show me having show them their my penis. And that was just kind of like, and then like we did Japan stuff. Then we did like tea and like sushi and stuff. But like there was like, you, you, you know, you'd embellish the story a bit, right? My thing with Oppenheimer was like, how do people even go to Japan that are American without them being like, dude, get the fuck out of here.
00:32:44
Speaker
I think they're like psyched. Yeah. I think they got over it. Oh yeah. After that, I agree with you. I would never get over that. I think it's cause we kind of like just like you, we just like dunked on them that hard. Jesus. We were like, cause we, cause after that, like after they lost after that and then like the war was over, then we were like occupied Japan for, I don't know, like multiple years.
00:33:10
Speaker
And we rounded up every Japanese person in America and made them live in an internment. Yeah, dude. And even now it like we rode into there. We like changed their government so that they didn't. So the emperor or didn't have any authority anymore. And we made it so that their military can only act in self defense. Like we just like, we like kneecapped to the, that entire country.
00:33:35
Speaker
Like to this day, they've, they've been like kneecap by us. So like, they kind of have to thanks a lot, but also like, and we have rock and roll and they're like, this is a bad ass. Yeah. Yeah. But also like they invented all the things that, uh, you know, kind of ruined low key ruin my life. Computers, TVs, phones, anime, imitation crab stick.
00:34:04
Speaker
They kind of got us back in a way. If you think about that. Do you guys like that dude that just eats all those crazy ramen dishes in his truck? Uncomfortable. It made me uncomfortable. He just plays the bongos between that? Yeah. That one I found unsettling. I love that dude. He munches, dude. He food in that fucking cab.
00:34:32
Speaker
just kind of freaked me out. It's not that I don't respect the ramen game, but I, I don't know. It's a lot. Dude. Oh, they fucking eat so many green onion or scallions or whatever, dude. What the hell is going on with that? And just like the weirdest meat. What was that like?
00:34:50
Speaker
It was, it was shaped like a crab, but it wasn't a crab. No, I know. And a spam. Yeah. Yeah. Big old spam and then some weird like crab jello. Yeah. Think about the spam too. Is he not like cut it at all? He just ate it like a fucking ball. Steamed it like a hot dog and ate it. Yeah, dude. I'm always like, well, if this, the dishes he makes need to be like 10 out of 10 spicy or else they're going to taste like shit.
00:35:22
Speaker
And I don't get how he eats all that in general. How do they eat that much ramen with all that sodium without dying? Uh, that's a good question. I wonder if that's a thing or if they just like have a way around it. Yeah. My dude is cooking crazy meals in there, dude. Cause like, cause like, like Greek people just like chug olive oil, but they like, they're fine. Cause it's like something else about them that makes it okay.
00:35:51
Speaker
Let me look, I gotta, I gotta give the, uh, user handle out there for everybody listening to look it up on themselves to see who we're talking about. It's my dude right here. He crushes it in the fucking truck cab, dude. Yes. There's something about MOCO Zecora. M O K O Z A K U R A. Yeah. That fake crab one was crazy weird.
00:36:20
Speaker
This is pretty ignorant, but is there like something against blowing on your food in their culture? He blows on it. I checked. He blows on it. He just eats boiling kind of ramen noodles and then makes a face. He blows on it a few times. You know, if you watched Shogun, you would know the answer to that question. I had a look at what the fuck. That's his first comment. His diet is 80% sodium.
00:36:48
Speaker
what is that crab let's see imitation crab it's like a chicken nugget but with fish meat shaped like a crab okay dude this guy loves this shit and then he drinks a red bowl after
00:37:14
Speaker
There's a whole scene in Shogun where some Japanese babe teaches him about manners. And I think that blowing on food is one of the things. They're Asian cultures, they can do it. But in Muslim cultures, it's considered rude.
00:37:32
Speaker
In Muslim, Muslim cultures, everything's fucking weird. It's unhygienic. Person's breath carries slash contains germs, which may transfer to the food. Holy shit, they still believe in the vapors. Dude, they they wipe their fucking ass with their hands, though. Hey, that's that's racist. Don't say that. That's true. What do you mean?
00:37:55
Speaker
They're like, uh, you know, like Middle East bathrooms don't have toilet paper. You just like use your hand and then you wash your hand off. But like, you know, you just have poo hands all day. No, you don't look it up. That's not true, dude. They have toilet paper over there. Do my Muslims wipe their butt with their hand?
00:38:19
Speaker
I'm really not trying to, if this is, so somebody's got to help me. If this is racist, somebody's got to tell me. Yeah. We got to bring toilet paper over there and fucking blow the, blow the industry up. This is something somebody said to me in high school once it's stuck in my brain ever since. So somebody's got to tell me if I'm wrong. Guys, have you seen this? We'll export, we'll import it into fucking all of that, whatever. And you guys would love it.
00:38:49
Speaker
I feel like everywhere has just bidets. Oh, I forgot about it. They probably just use bidets. That makes way more sense. Sorry. Sorry. Entire country continent. Entire region. What the fuck, man? I don't know. Sounds believable. Well.
00:39:22
Speaker
This is straight from Wikipedia Islamic toilet etiquette after defecating the anus must be washed with water using the left hand Jesus if water is unavailable with an odd number of smooth stones or pebbles See that's the other thing dude, so the thing that the thing that Christianity got right is
00:39:49
Speaker
It was making religion not complicated. The fact that your religion is like you have to wipe your ass with an odd number of rocks or like Jewish people are like, you're not allowed to carry anything in your pocket on a Saturday. God hates it if you carry things in your pocket on Saturday. Can't push the elevator button or turn the elevator button.
00:40:12
Speaker
But like then Christianity came along and they were like, dude, just like, can you just chill for like one hour a week? Like come to our house for like one hour a week and like, we're going to make you like stand in the kneel and then stand in the kneel. But like, that's it. You just do one hour and then you can be whatever fucking maniac you want to be all week. That's where they got it right. All the other religions are like, they're just stupid. Actually in Christianity, you can do anything you want as long as you admit to it.
00:40:40
Speaker
Yeah. But then even, yeah, yes. Facts. But then also Christianity isn't like, Oh no, you're not allowed to drink water out of a glass. That's more than eight inches tall. God hates it when the water is more than eight inches off the ground. Like that would be a perfectly, if you learned that like acidic Jews believe that water that's more than eight inches off the ground is dirty, you'd be like, yeah, that sounds like something they do. Yeah.
00:41:07
Speaker
Can't believe you made that up about Middle Eastern people, dude. Dude, it's on. You made this fake Wikipedia really quick. That guy fucking walking into Paul's room with a handful of pebbles in the hotel. Oh, my God, dude. Oh, man.
00:41:34
Speaker
Did they do it when they come to America too? I don't know. That's fucking crazy. I've got a new favorite subreddit.
00:41:52
Speaker
to find the sniper and it's just pictures of random things and it'll be like find the like this is a picture of a bunch of rocks and then it just says find the white spider.
'Find the Sniper' subreddit mention
00:42:03
Speaker
Oh, I like that. Damn. Have you seen that one with snow leopard? Snow leopard one's great. That's it's that type of picture. Yeah. That'll be someone's like picture someone's house and like find the rattlesnake.
00:42:20
Speaker
And it's like damn near impossible to find. There is no rattlesnake. Dude, they could get you so good on that. Where's this fucking white spider? I'm going to find it. I'm going to find the spider. Do I have it? Where is it? Here, spider. Here, spider.
00:42:50
Speaker
Some of them are ridiculous. Like the spider one is ridiculous. You find it? I can't find it. Is that it? I can't tell. Smushed the spider. Oh, I found it. Oh, that's a good one. All right. Where is it? Uh. Let me see. Like halfway.
00:43:19
Speaker
There's like a white rock in the center, right? And then the rock immediately to the right of it that kind of has like an orange stripe down the middle. Zoom in like right above that orange stripe. Good eyes. That's what he's good at, dude. He's professional.
00:43:48
Speaker
That's his affliction. He's really good at finding things in pictures. Yes. Yep. I found spider. Big way as Waldo fan. Me and spider friends. Jared, are you going to do the, uh, Reaper challenge when I send you one? Yes, dude. I'll come there and do it. I'll say all you do off you to fresh off the plant. Oh God. I'm good on hot peppers ever since Jeff Coco pranked me with that one.
00:44:18
Speaker
Dude, I'm sending you a Reaper, dude. You got to do it. I'm going to do it. You got to be here for then. Yeah. I'll, uh, I'll see that. I'll be there for that. All right. Word. That's worth it. How hot is a Reaper pepper? Let's look that up. I think it's like a million Scoville or something Carolina Reaper, right? Yep.
00:44:45
Speaker
1.64 million Scoville units. I'm not worried about it. I told you I used to jalapenos 8,000. I've done well. That's a lie. That was weird. When I started working at the grocery store, they were like, you don't have to eat the habanero pepper.
00:45:14
Speaker
I like that. That's just hazing. Don't eat the habanero. I need a whole one, but I grew Trinidad Marongo scorpions one year and I did a little, I'll do a little bite ski. How was that? Trinidad Marongo scorpion, not for the faint of heart. Okay. I would say that was bad for about 45 minutes.
00:45:39
Speaker
Well, that's 200,000 less Scoville units than the Carolina Reaper. Yeah, but at that point, I feel like it's like you have, like, I know they can keep measuring it through Scovilles, but I feel like at some point you've just like, you've maxed your tongue's detection limit where it's just like, yeah, this is just fucking, I'm just fucked right now. It's good for you if you eat a hot pepper like once a week.
00:46:08
Speaker
I'm into it. My older brother who was really into exploring his states of consciousness loved hot things. Yep. And he had this liquid I think it might have just been like pure capsaic. I'm not exactly sure what it was. But you would take a toothpick and dip it into it and then dot the toothpick on your tongue and it would make your tongue swell up. Damn.
00:46:32
Speaker
Like it was so unbelievably hot that you would just, your nose would start running, your tongue would swell, and it was just a tip of a pin, dude. Yeah, dude. It gets into your body and then fucking fights off the bad shit because it's so fucked up. Keemana, he was like, you should try it. And I tried it one time and then I was like, I'm never doing that again, dude. Like, why the fuck did you make me do that?
00:47:01
Speaker
He didn't have a good answer for that, but I don't know. He also really liked ghost pepper. Oh, that's bigger now. We had, uh, this would have been like 2005, 2008, somewhere in there. One of our neighbors made us ground dried.
00:47:31
Speaker
ghost pepper and it was in just like this little tiny vial and then he just went through this weird phase where he only ate quinoa and just dump it all over the quinoa and then just smash it just a bowl of quinoa and fucking hot pepper oh god i mean he also used to eat those fish stover things so oh god jesus christ
00:48:03
Speaker
fish stoffers. Yeah. Loved them. Yeah, look that up. Microwave. Yeah, we talked about it last week. It's microwave fish and macaroni and cheese. Listen, dude, he was also his fucking diet for a long time was just quinoa with fucking
00:48:32
Speaker
butter and ghost pepper on it. Holy fuck. This fucking mac and cheese and fish filets. Dude. He was a stout individual, dude. This is like the height of, I don't even know, it's like mean. It's like mean that this exists. Disrespectful to food.
00:49:04
Speaker
I'll have a seance and ask him why he liked it. You know, it's tough. Some things just know what you're know what to expect. Dude was eating like he was in prison for some reason. Yeah, exactly. torturing himself. What the fuck, man? He liked them to probably would ask for it.
00:49:45
Speaker
Yeah, that's fucked up bro, I have people fucking doing that I mean just I know that it's not a you know, I know it's not a What you know, yeah
00:49:59
Speaker
It's right off the fish filet, but it's like how they get the how they get that brick of fish into the shape of the like the trapezoid shape of the of the container battered to. Yeah, we're just like, all right. This was this was just a this was just a fish slurry that got like reconstituted into a shape. I wonder if you can still buy them.
00:50:32
Speaker
Yeah, you can. Oh my God. Damn. We. Had to be tonight, but you know, when we started and. It was zero one panthers, I was like, all right, this this will just be a lame game one. Everyone's fucked them up for one.
00:50:54
Speaker
Yeah, fuck with a lot dude or one with five left in the period. Go Bruins. Go Bruins off to have the Panthers come back and score or be very typical of us, but I need to get a metal detector. Oh, you should get a metal detector, dude. We got like cannonballs on your property. The fuck am I going to do with all that metal? I don't know.
00:51:22
Speaker
You don't think it'd be just fun to have? I think I could just fucking throw it in a pile and scrap it or some shit. Yeah, you could smelt it. There's some good fucking metal I found just above the ground too. Yeah. This metal detector. I mean, dude, you're kind of, you're kind of in that space, living space now where you can just be like, Hey man, I got like, I don't know, like,
00:51:50
Speaker
10 or 15 pounds of metal of random ass metal. You want to trade that with some stakes, trade that for some stakes, trade that for a basket of corn. Yeah, dude. Get some stakes. That's good.
00:52:17
Speaker
Nothing wrong with some steaks. Save that scrap metal bro. That's, that scrap metal is basically steaks. Hmm. I have to fucking get this. The mechanic at work takes scrap metal every couple of weeks. He brings in his trailer, takes follow with him. Hmm. I have to check eBay.
00:52:47
Speaker
Maybe that's where the good metal detectors are. I'm still on Avid eBay or two. It's a good website. I'll tell you guys that. What kinds of stuff do you get off eBay? Just buy, swap stuff. You know what I mean? Yeah, a little bit of this, a little bit of that. Yeah. Sold some old golf clubs last week. That was good.
00:53:11
Speaker
Hmm. Now they got some special fucking detectors on here. I'll have to post a video of me using one of these. Like how far do you dig until you get, you know what I mean? It tells you it's got a screen and it'll tell you about the depth that it's detecting. It'll be like six inches or it'll be like a foot. No way. Get a good one. Yeah. If there's a whole screen, I'll give you a depth. Now we're talking.
00:53:43
Speaker
All right, I can get down with that. Paul, you got to do some metal detecting. That's right up your alley. Yeah, we were using one the other day at work and it sucked. Why? Trying to find an old head that's buried just like kept detecting everything.
00:54:08
Speaker
it would be like, you know, you put it on unrestricted sensor mode and it would just go off if it went over a rock. And then would you put it on? Excuse me, just regular sensor mode, it would go off when you went over a rock. So kind of was more of a rock detector is what you're saying. Yeah, yeah, dude. Apparently, there's a lot of very metallic rocks at the country club. Dude, why don't you fucking
00:54:38
Speaker
Get them out of there. Yeah. That's a good point. Smelting. You ever thought of getting into smelting? Add that into your morning, dude. Picking out rocks under the fucking soil, dude. Come on. That's dangerous. Someone could hit their club on one and break their wrist. You just go to your bonds tomorrow and be like, I would like to install a Bessemer steel furnace.
00:55:06
Speaker
for extracting iron from. Orange. Shaping runes. I didn't see Augusta have any rocks on their course. Mm. Yeah, they probably do. I mean, they they're. Below the glaciation line, so, you know, there you go.
00:55:35
Speaker
There you go. Now you're on to it. Why the fuck do I need a shovel with this? I have my own shovel. You mean like you don't want to include the shovel? Yeah, it's fucking I don't need a shovel. I don't think it tells me how deep this shit is. It gives you a depth to meant.
00:55:59
Speaker
What does it use to, does it just like a magnet or some shit? It's got like a metal coil that like an electromagnet. And so when you've got, uh, electrons moving through a wire near another metal, it perturbs the electrons in that metal. And that's how it detects the fluctuations in the magnetic field between the two metals, the coil and the other bit of metal. And then that's how it.
00:56:28
Speaker
It detects the metal. Okay. It can estimate the depth because it's like, okay, the strength of that fluctuation of magnetic fields. It's like, okay, I started feeling that. At this point, it must be like eight inches down. Find a bunch of Indian spears. Yeah. Find some civil civil war musket balls.
00:56:57
Speaker
I mean, I'm in a previous native land, so probably some good shit over here. Don't tell anybody that you found it. Yeah, that's true. If you do find anything, don't tell anybody. Why not? I'll just fucking sell it on eBay, dude. Because you're not supposed to disturb archaeological finds. You're supposed to just call like the university and have them come. Then they get to fucking sell it.
00:57:28
Speaker
and they basically take over your property. Yeah, they're like, this is Appalachian Indian property now. Good day to you, sir. This is the Cleveland Indians property. We're playing nine innings out here. 365. Excuse me, dude, there's a guardians now. Is it really?
00:57:55
Speaker
Yeah, they stopped being the Indians like three, four years ago. Are you gonna what's your plan with your leases up? I don't know. I'm like looking at houses. Okay, look, looking at redfin for houses, some ranches. Really a house.
00:58:13
Speaker
It doesn't really have to be a ranch. I just, it's just impossible around here. I don't know how anyone does it. Who wants to pay like $800,000 fucking madness. You just gotta, gotta fucking pray and get your grind up every day. Just grind harder. You know, be a real estate agent. You sell yourself the house, you get commission. Yeah, that's right. Commission.
00:58:37
Speaker
That's right. Do you think Live Life Jam or whatever the fuck his name is would let that stop him? Yeah. You think Rob Dyrdek would let that stop him? Let like a fucking pothole stop him. Rob Dyrdek fucking does those fake podcast videos on his Instagram now. I hate it. She does what? Go to his Instagram. He acts like he's
00:59:05
Speaker
Like doing a podcast, but he's just making an Instagram video in a podcast studio to make it seem like that. No, I hate that. Yep. I can't wait for these pepper seeds come in, dude. How many, uh, how many like, uh, hectors of pepper are you planting? Hector's the fuck kind of word is that how, what, how much peppers are you planting? How many?
00:59:35
Speaker
Yeah. Um, I don't know, maybe like a hundred. All right. That is a good amount. Hector is a square, uh, sure. Hector is a hundred, 200 square meters, 10,000 square meters, a hundred errors. So I meant to say a hundred meters by a hundred meters. Probably meters, dude. Yeah. Right. Love meters.
01:00:04
Speaker
A hundred acres, a hundred acre woods. Yeah, dude. Jared's uncle. Yeah. Let's go back to that one. Jared's uncle. Got him. Fucking Mexican guy. Ooh, man. This is going to be good. Seven pot Fino bubble gum. Bubble gum Fino one. Love that.
01:00:34
Speaker
I got some mild ones, some goat peppers. You got, you can eat those Paul. No, that's what, that's what Jeff Koko told me. And then he gave me the yellow banana. It wasn't a banana pepper. It was like a yellow something pepper. And I just ate the whole thing. Cause I'm like, I don't know. I like hot stuff. I like him and the other kid's face. Just they stopped laughing. I was like, Oh no. I got some Burmese bird.
01:01:05
Speaker
Burmese bird. Carolina Reapers. Those are going to be crazy. You just know you made a mistake when people's faces, they stop laughing. I'm not even going to use these. Like I'm just going to give them to people. You're just going to drive around and find homeless people and be like, do the one chip challenge. Just vacuum seal, send them out. Did you just get a package of big? What the hell is this? You got to do it.
01:01:34
Speaker
What the hell? I'll just dry it and make it into dust. Yeah, that's what I was going to do too. Just make it into dust and then just, if people want a little bit of a spray, I'll fucking do that too. Could do like pocket sand, but it's pocket hot chili dust. Everybody fucks with it. You just throw a bunch of hot chili dust in their face.
01:02:02
Speaker
hot pepper jam. Ooh, that sounds good. I got sprayed with pepper spray on time. It's fucking terrible. Um, break into the library. Yeah. No, I mean, it's not even a cool story. Just we were young and this other kid that I had over at my house picked up the bottle of pepper spray and just shot me in the face with it. Oh, that's awesome. Or whatever, but
01:02:31
Speaker
yeah got me all over my mouth and like all over my nose he didn't hit me in the eyes but it just burned like hell dude it was terrible burn like heck dude come on now yeah that's true what would uh what would Mark Wahlberg say
01:03:00
Speaker
He'd say stay prayed up. Happy national prayer day. I don't think he's actually religious. You don't. Oh, I think all that shit's fake. I think any celebrity who really leans into the God stuff is just doing it. Cause he knows that those people are dumb and we'll buy what they're selling. I mean, it's not, not true, but can it be both?
01:03:30
Speaker
Nah, manipulative people aren't that, you know? Yeah. All right, Hector, let's wrap this bitch up. We've come to an end. So now it's time. Mm.
01:03:58
Speaker
Shout out to Jared's uncle Hector. Jared's uncle Jose. Oh man. Shout out to Jared's uncle Jose. Don't let him do a shout out. Shout out uncle Miguel.
01:04:30
Speaker
All right. Good night. Goodbye. Just God.