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evil eems
3.1k Plays1 month ago
s2 ep3: in this episode p actually answers emons very difficult would u rather (unheard of), krih talks about her 3way first kiss and the girls go over their toxic traits, times they’ve gotten lost in the bit, weird hyper fixations, making friends and more :)
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Transcript
Setting the Scene: Important Conversations
00:00:00
Speaker
Hey, Chris. Hi, Eames. What's up? I have to tell you something. Oh, my God. Okay. Should I three-way Peyton in? Yeah, call me. Okay. Hello. Hey, Eames needs to tell us something. I'm three-waying you in. Okay, immediately. Okay, so... Hi, babies. Hello, Kristen and not Peyton.
00:00:20
Speaker
Oh, yeah. So the beef of the day is that Im sent a pretty good would you rather to the group chat and you um Peyton, as usual, couldn't answer. So then Iman said, OK, cool. Well, I am going silent then. So all day ah she has been texting me on the side to coordinate, chit chat, um send her answers in.
00:00:47
Speaker
Uh, so we'll see how long this bit continues.
Humor in Relationships: 'Would You Rather' Challenge
00:00:51
Speaker
Okay. Can we talk about the would you rather? I want him on to say the, would you rather? I do too. I do too. It's a really good one because I couldn't even get through the first three words without refusing to read the rest. So say the rest on camera, please. Well, Kristen, can you say it? No, I want him on to say, I'll answer it if you say it.
00:01:13
Speaker
Okay. Well, okay. So the would you rather is that you either have, you have to say, I'm gonna start crying. So it grosses me out so much together. There's tears in my eyes.
00:01:39
Speaker
Can Kristin please say you have to say? Oh my god. I'm just not answering it. This is our own joke. Okay wait, okay hold on. You either have to say, Moyda my pussy please. Five times in a row the next time you have sex. Moyda meaning murder but spelled M-O-I-D-A. Pronounce mortar.
00:02:03
Speaker
mo yeah moa my pugue sir And like a Sherlock's home like detective kind of um Five times in a row back to back to back to back or you have to wrap the first verse of WAP unironically during penetration so You know a little bit you want to give a little yes re knew what That would would sound like So that would sound a little something like, extra large and extra hard. Put this pussy right in your face. Swipe your nose like a credit card. Hop on top. I want a ride. Do it while it's inside. Spit in my mouth. Look in my eyes. This pussy wet. Come take a dive. Tie me up like I'm surprised. Let's role play. I wear a disguise. I want you to park that big Mack truck right in the field garage.
00:02:49
Speaker
Why are you reading it like a Dr. Seuss book? Do you want me to read it? Like, I mean, yes, I have to read it that way. I want to know it, but okay. I obviously immediately chose that one because anytime I can rap while being penetrated, I'm going to choose. Anytime Kirsten can do the combo, she's going to choose the combo. I'm going to do that combo. That's probably my lore. Yes. Rap in the sex combo. So Peyton, what's your answer? At the same time.
00:03:18
Speaker
I would have to say... You promised! The second one. Yeah, girl. I knew it. Wait, am I the only one that would go the first one?
00:03:31
Speaker
The first one is just so scary that I, who and so also here's the thing, moita is like a joke in my relationship. Like whenever something's bad, I'll just go moita and joke. It's the funniest thing ever. So we couldn't like mix that into the bedroom because then it would never be funny again.
00:03:50
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Well, anyways, I just wanted to like have a fun, would you rather with my girls and like Peyton just always refuses. So I'm glad that we were able to hash this out a and move forward. Just a little bribery goes a long way. Worked it out on the remix, huh?
00:04:08
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
First Experiences: Alcohol and Kisses
00:04:10
Speaker
Okay, so um this little episode right here, you guys, we're going to answer some questions. um Some are some good ones from the audience. Some might be some that I've been collecting in a random shared note anytime I hear a good question because I take my podcasting job very seriously. Let me just tee this up really quick. I can. And we'll get right into it. Okay, following up ah from last episode,
00:04:38
Speaker
I'm just joking. I just wanted to use another term. Oh, right. Do you guys, do you guys get it or?
00:04:52
Speaker
ah okay good Here's some from the audience to start us off. First time high and drunk or high and high or drunk, high and drunk, whatever.
00:05:06
Speaker
Um, my first time drinking, I was out at my grandparents ranch and hell yeah, girl, me and my friend, cause you're out in the middle of nothing. I was with my grandma. My grandma's not, she was not aware at this time. Like what was going on with me and my best friend, Emily.
00:05:21
Speaker
We went into my grandpa's bar. He's got this like basement bar. That's like outfitted. It looks like a, like a dive bar kind of place. It's honestly so sick, but we found alcohol like in the bar. No, we have no idea how old this was. Like in hindsight, we probably should have like done some research. We took a shot of every single type of alcohol that he had. No, just back to back way, including like amaretto.
00:05:46
Speaker
Wait, that's actually so fun. and We just had access to a full bar, basically. A full bar. It was insane. it's like It looks like a full bar, too. We were just like belly up to the bar, taking shots of stuff. And I ended up like throwing up like black. like It was like bile. It was so disgusting. Because obviously, the mixture of everything, it was just like, oh, so nasty. like I still can like just like smell the smells. Just ruining every kind of alcohol for yourself at once.
00:06:16
Speaker
Well, mostly just like whiskey. Cause my grandpa's a big whiskey guy, but we realized some of it must've been like bad, but yeah, we were not okay. But we would do that all the time in high school. We'd go out to my grandparents' ranch and like just be out there. We'd invite like the guys from the neighboring town over and they would just like come to the bar and you can't, they couldn't hear it. Like my grandparents couldn't hear us. So we were just like going crazy. That's so sick. that is fine Crazy girls. Do you guys do seven minutes in heaven?
00:06:43
Speaker
o No, I didn't kiss a boy till I was 18. I was too scared. oh I could throw up bile basically, but kissing a boy, that was crossing the line. Oh, let's tell our first kiss stories after this. That'll be one of the Kristin Ritchie specials that I throw in. okay um
High School Labels and Social Perceptions
00:07:01
Speaker
I hated that. ah
00:07:05
Speaker
Anyways. Anyways, the first time I drank drank or the first time I got drunk was after homecoming and I was newly friends with Jessica Lee Lewis and all the older girls. I had grown up with some, but um you know, I was cool. They wanted to hang out with me. So like I got to go to an after party and I literally probably had like one and a half mixed drinks, maybe not even. And I was shit face and Spent the night. It was like a whole like typical college party Someone's parents were out of town. Everyone spent the night. It was so fun. But yeah Eames Wow. Yeah crazy Let me think. So my, um, one of my best childhood friends, Samantha, her older sister was like, I think three, two grades older than me. And so I was a freshman and no, i I don't know. I was either in the eighth grade or a freshman in high school and her older sister had a party and I had two Smirnoff ice and I was blacked out so much so that I was in her grandma's arms.
00:08:14
Speaker
saw being saying, please don't call my mom, please don't call my mom. And her grandma's just like rocking me to sleep. And her grandma still till this day, like does not let me forget it. um But yeah, I cried like a little baby all night. Quite like a little baby. Two Smirnoff ices is fucking crazy. Two Smirnoff ice and I was gone. Yeah. I mean, let's be honest, I probably had like a shot total in my like one and a half drinks and was like,
00:08:45
Speaker
off this lizard. Well, before I went to high school, my best friend Samantha was like, okay, I was a grade older than her. So she was like, okay, we like can't be lame at parties. So we out went out to her trampoline and she was like, we have to see how many beers gets you drunk, how many shots gets you drunk. So we would like conduct studies on her trampoline and she would like we would go out there with a case of beer that we'd get like from her parents bars and go to your grandparents, Peyton.
00:09:10
Speaker
and so i would like have like three beers but okay i think i'm drunk but then she couldn't drink because she had to monitor to see if i was drunk so it was like very like scientific it wasn't fun we weren't like it was like she was sober i was like drink with me she's like no we like have to get this down to a science mind you she's a lawyer now so like that makes she's like really upon her shit It's also like does kind of seem like a very human thing as well. It's such a human thing. You did not want me to be embarrassed. She was like really thinking about because like obviously as a younger person, you're like, Oh my God, what high school gonna be like? And I was going so props to her because that took me like a full decade of drinking. And then I finally was like, Oh, I can't take shots because I, I'm a tiny little girl. I don't weigh as much and I am five foot two and I'm trying to keep up with like the boys.
00:09:55
Speaker
I still don't know. I think we talked about that before. Yeah. Teeny tiny, a little speck. Okay, so for my first kiss, you guys, I probably wasn't like my first first kiss. Like I definitely had like other little ones, but like my first makeouts, I was kind of like late to the game as well, Peyton, but I was still in high school. I think I was like 15.
00:10:20
Speaker
And I went to a third eye blind concert at this stadium and I made out with three guys that night. You went hard. but You were like, I'm going to have my first kiss, my second kiss, my third kiss. I went hard. like Literally the third kiss, I think, I was sitting on the first guy's lap making out with the third guy. I think I just decided. No. That is the most Kristin. Is it not? like Just full swing. I was like, oh, I'm a whore now.
00:10:57
Speaker
I've never been kissed to like full orgy, full make out orgy. Yeah, exactly. Like literally making out with someone while, yeah, I just, I can't, while we're at like a fucking baseball stadium and a third eye blind is playing in the back, like talk about goals. Did you have a bandana headband on?
00:11:16
Speaker
I probably i had my Jeffrey Campbell lead us on. Thanks for asking.
00:11:22
Speaker
And I was probably stumbling and shouldn't have been wearing six inch heels, but I did it for I did it for the fucking plot. I actually had that thought today. I haven't seen a good coming of age movie and from our like adolescence that properly shows
Gender Stereotypes: What's 'Just for Girls'?
00:11:40
Speaker
the the fashion.
00:11:42
Speaker
You should write it. I need, no, I need to style a coming of age film. I still, I have hoarded clothing. I have it all. Whatever. Anyways, your first kiss girls.
00:11:55
Speaker
Um, so I was, I was almost 18. I wasn't 18. I was like right before I turned 18. It was, I think like another homecoming situation. And we were all at my friend's house. Like it was like the party house and like people would sleep there and all of that stuff. It was like really close to my house. So like in my neighborhood.
00:12:15
Speaker
So I hadn't kissed anyone. Everyone knew that about me and I was just like drunk. And one of my guy friends was like, let's go over here and like pulled me by like a door, like the back into this hallway. And then he kissed me for the first time and it was so not good, but I obviously didn't know that. And then the next day,
00:12:37
Speaker
Actually, the next like Monday going into school, I was like a small private school. So like everyone knew each other, everyone knew each other's business. And like he walks into the school allegedly like beaming and people like teachers are talking about it all day. Like I'm sitting in class and teachers are bringing it up being like. Weird. Well, we all heard Peyton had a good weekend this weekend. Ooh. Yeah. It was like actually a little bit traumatizing, because people talked about that a lot. And like of course, the second I kissed someone, I enjoyed like the idea of like sexuality. So a few months later, I like actively lost my virginity. like I was seeking that out. Yeah. like So kind of how Eman was like doing her her drinking, I was like, for science, I need to get this done.
00:13:23
Speaker
So I did that and it's so crazy how you could be like such a prude. It's like the Madonna horror complex. You could be such a prude. And then the second you go that route, you're like a whore. You know what I mean?
00:13:34
Speaker
So anyways, that's my story. You
Self-Reflection: Toxic Traits and Personal Growth
00:13:36
Speaker
like overcorrect. Well, to other people is what I'm saying. Not like actually, like I was kind of doing what everyone else was doing, but then everyone's like, Oh, we always knew she was a whore. I'm like, what are you having sex too? It was so insane. We talked about this because she was like hot. So everyone just like thought she was a whore.
00:13:54
Speaker
Well, it was like you're obsessed with people you're being a prude or you're obsessed with the person being a whore. Yeah, there was nothing in between. And no one ah like not a lot of other people got that title, I guess, where I was from. But like it was people were just like weirdly attuned to that. So I just like acted like it. I'm so jealous of the people that never like thought of any of that is shameful like i i'm jealous of the people that got to do that without being labeled anything like you just got to be possible though like that's the private that's the kids that like are homeschooled
00:14:30
Speaker
and No, at my school, there was like so many people doing everything or worse what I was doing, like worse, quote unquote. And I felt like I got it harder than everyone else. And I was not even bad. Because some girls just looked the part. So people assumed like I had a girl like that at my school. Unfortunately, we all called her Lydia Chlamydia. And that's all about that.
00:14:53
Speaker
and Well it's like what we were saying I think season one episode one or two about like Anne Hathaway how she doesn't look like a slut so if we found out she was just like fucking we'd be really talking about how Anne Hathaway fucks because she just looks so like clean cut which like isn't fair obviously to everyone else but if we heard like I don't know Megan Fox yeah if we heard Megan Fox is fucking it's like okay well duh but if you hear Anne Hathaway is fucking it's like we're gonna talk about it I know. And that's on reading a book by its cover. Right. Am I right? You're so right. I think we can all take something from this. Yeah. I hope you girls are taking notes while you're listening. Yeah. And I hope you girls share that. Yeah. It's really important. Um, okay. So here's the thing. Everyone's going to roll their eyes. The reason why I can't talk about my first kiss is because moving on. And moving on and that's that.
00:15:47
Speaker
Um, let's name off some things that are just for girls. Just for girls. I'm gonna say something really controversial. I don't know if I'll have to cut it out. No,
00:16:00
Speaker
no we are not fucking cutting that. I don't know if we could say that. It's going to be like 10 years from now and it's going to be this specific moment. What else? There are so many things. Sandals. Sandals. I do really think like social media is for the girls. I think yeah obviously thirst traps are for the girls, selfies are for the girls. Chasers. If we're taking a straw and I don't need a chaser and you're like, oh, I can't take this unless I need Sprite. Oh my. Right? Or no? Yeah. No, you're right.
00:16:32
Speaker
Yeah, yeah i'm like a man of it it's like, okay, let's just not even take this any like, let's just actually have to go home. It does ever happen. Yes. I think weapons are for the girls because I think men should have to just like defend themselves with their bare hands. Yeah.
00:16:51
Speaker
even Yeah, I think like if you're fist fighting someone and then you pull out a gun and you shoot them, that's the earliest thing you can ever do. Because it's like, oh, he's like gonna win the fights where you have to shoot them. Yeah, and that's weird. You have to use a fucking gun. Yeah. ah Yeah, that's fucking the loser shit.
00:17:16
Speaker
This is like really like I'm really coming out of the bat right now This one doesn't really make sense But I feel like it's relevant in my life right now is like I have a bug bite right now That's like kind of itchy and it's really annoying, but I just feel like guys shouldn't like have bug bites.
00:17:35
Speaker
Yeah, they should have bug bites. It like doesn't sound right. Like, oh, I have this bug bite and it's really itchy. I don't know. It just doesn't really sit right with me. No, I think water bottles yeah are for the girls.
00:17:46
Speaker
Like, you can't have celiac if you're avoiding it. Yeah, tummy aches are, no. No. I think I've offended every community so far. We're going to move on. Free stuff for the girls only. Gifting. Men have to pay for everything. Gifting. Gifting's only for the girls. Not liking a photo of themselves.
00:18:12
Speaker
is for the girls. I should have to tell you that you look really bad. Yeah. Being insecure. No, I think I can be insecure about like another guy, like something that like threatens their manhood, but like it being like, Oh, I like disgusting in this photo. It's like, how do you, like, why do you, yeah why are you thinking about that? Yeah. Okay.
00:18:36
Speaker
um okay What's your guys's most toxic trait? My anxiety probably because it makes me like get anxious. Yeah. Cause it makes me get anxious about things that aren't going to happen. And then I act like they're going to happen even though they're not happening. Do you know what I'm saying? Oh, I see. Can you give us a real life example? Like if Joe does something that like stresses me out and in the long run, like let's say he's doing something now that I'm fast forwarding 30 years from now. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, this means he's going to cheat on me with the 25 year old. And then we're going to have to get divorced. And what's the point of even being
Relationship Dynamics: Fast Moves and Breakups
00:19:06
Speaker
in a relationship then?
00:19:07
Speaker
Right. That's what I do. Yeah. No, same. No, actually, same. But you're expecting your fears out there. you know like You're doing it. I really am. I was talking to someone yesterday about how I like never really pictured myself getting married. I've always wanted to have kids, but I never pictured myself getting married, because she was asking me all about like engagement and all this stuff. And I went into her my engagement, and she was like, so you're not really romantic, are you? I was like, no. I just want to get this.
00:19:35
Speaker
No, thank you for asking. I was just another check on the list, baby. You can text me if you want to text me to marry you. You don't need to do anything too queasy. Just call me. You can text me. Not text. Yeah, do not text me. Because I'm not going to react like a normal person. And I'm overwhelmed already even thinking about it. So I just, in the moment, it's going to be hard.
00:20:03
Speaker
Toxic trait. I think I move really really fast in relationships, which like I don't know if that's toxic or not You kind of just like have to be on my wavelength Or I'm gonna really weird you out but I think I don't know how to like date in a way that normal people date I feel like I go first date And if that goes well, we're we literally together. We're just like together until further notice. Um, but I don't know if that's toxic because if someone just like matches my freak then. Yeah, I don't know. if that's I think mine is, um, that I automatically hate most men.
00:20:50
Speaker
So if they say something, like if my first impression is off, I'm i'm like, Oh, fuck him. Like that literally happened in Canada. Like Your default is that you hate men. So it's like anything against them is like already in the negatives. Right. So in Canada, ah one of the dudes that I actually had met, I forgot I had, but he like said something. He was like, you guys aren't going to go wake surfing. It's easy or something. And I was like, oh, well, now he's my mortal enemy and I fucking hate him. And then I really honestly ended up liking him and, um,
00:21:26
Speaker
Wait, did you have a fling at the lake? No, no, no. He's married. Oh. I just like, he's like really nice and a good guy and like cool. And I was like, got it. You like immediately hated him. Cause he said one thing you didn't like. Yeah, exactly. And my friend was like, Oh my God. I was like judging everything he was doing. Cause you told me that like you hated him. And so then I started looking at him differently. I was like, I have to stop doing this. Um, so yeah, that would be my toxic trait. What about you girls? Were you doing round two?
00:22:02
Speaker
No, but do you want to think of another one, Eames? I don't know if that was toxic. And Peyton is claiming that you're a toxic person. So I want to hear. I feel like you're toxic after you're in a relationship. We talked about this. Yeah, I'm not really toxic in a relationship. But how are you toxic after? Explain that. Oh, someone's my ex.
00:22:24
Speaker
So I'm very intentional with every step of dating. and Like when I'm in a relationship, I like try to communicate as well as I can. I try to like do everything that's conducive to a healthy relationship. And the second, once we break up, it's like, I don't have these same like healthy things in my brain. It's just like, I need to win. I need to come out on top.
00:22:45
Speaker
We need, you need to think about me for the rest of your life. You need everyone to like never compare to me. And like, it's, I just become this very toxic, like.
00:22:58
Speaker
I don't know. i like I'll go on a date and then text them like, I'm on a date, but I'll leave right now if you call me an Uber. like I'll do stuff like that after a breakup. So I would say like once you wake up, a it's just a different version of me. She's an animal. she So one one year for Valentine's Day, this guy planned this really, really sweet day for us.
00:23:21
Speaker
And he knows I love hot dogs. So like he planned like a pregame at my favorite bar and then like a hot dog like tasting at this other restaurant. And then we were supposed to go to this other place and he had this whole entire plan for us. He was on his way to pick me up. My ex calls me and is like, Hey, what are you doing tonight? And I was like, um, this guy is on his way to pick me up for Valentine's day.
00:23:44
Speaker
But if you tell me to cancel it right now, I will. Mind you, I had broken up with him. So he was like not trying to be vulnerable. And he wasn't really giving me enough like emotion recently. And I was craving it. And I knew he wanted to hang out with me. So I was like, tell me to cancel it. And he was like, well.
00:24:00
Speaker
yeah And I was like, all right, well, he'll probably be here soon, so I have to go. Calls me back. All right. I mean, i should I, and I was like, you have to tell me to cancel it. I don't know. He's literally on the way. And this sounds insane, but, and it was, it was very, very insane. and He ends up making a reservation for us and I text the guy, I say, Hey, feeling sick, like can't make it. I'm expecting for him to be like, what the fuck? He was the nicest guy. He was like, I've totally been sick before in a time where it was like super inconvenient. I don't want to make you feel bad about this. I think I told him I was hungover and he was like, I've been hungover before. I know exactly what that feels like when like you don't want to cancel and blah, blah, blah. Like don't worry. I've changed all of our reservations to be for tomorrow now. So I'm hoping that you feel better by tomorrow. Fisher's a hangover. He's like,
00:24:47
Speaker
Oh my God. He moved our entire date to the next day. So I spend the whole night with my ex. We obviously, I sleep over at his house. I go to work. My, my old Valentine's day picks date tech picks me up the next day and we do like a full night of Valentine's day stuff. And I just wasn't into it. I think I might've ended things like very shortly after that. Cause I was like, you're like, oop.
00:25:15
Speaker
He has to stand for something or he'll fall for everything. I should have never gotten away with that. And another thing, if you let me get away with something that I don't think I should have, I have no respect for you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's so that's what I mean by Iman post relationship toxicity. Like you just get excited for these like yeah one off things. You can get away with being toxic because you. Yes. Evil Eames. Seriously. So serious. Yeah. You should try doing it like beforehand. It's fun.
00:25:43
Speaker
No, I can't. Because I don't want to be crazy and then like ruin my trajectory. Even to me dating someone right now, I really tried to do everything so healthily and I won't. Sometimes I have to resist the urge. I do. I can't lie. But Evil Eams is for post-breakup. And it's fun. Evil Eams. I tell you a lot of Evil Eams stories, but maybe that could be an episode in itself.
00:26:12
Speaker
Yeah, I would love that. I would love to hear. Can you guys think of any times you've gotten lost in the bit? um Me. No. Unfortunately, I do know what real life is. I can think of one time I called out of work saying I had COVID, and I had to like on a meeting pretend so much that I was sick that afterwards I forgot I actually wasn't. So I laid in bed all day, and I was like, ugh, I have to order food. like Mind you, I felt like I needed a break from work, so I was just like, I'm going to say I have COVID. I'm going to lay down for a couple days. I spent my whole day laying in bed, and then at 3 PM,
00:26:51
Speaker
I was like, there's no way. I'm actually not sick. So I stood up and I was like, I just got lost in the bit so hard that I fully was like, oh, I just wish I wasn't sick. Like it's such a nice day outside. And I couldn't believe how far I was in this bit for donning. I was sick that I literally believed it. I didn't leave my bed. It was the dumbest thing I've ever done. um It's like not bad, but one of the dumbest things.
00:27:18
Speaker
Yeah, how about you girls? I would say my 69 bit I got lost in. I got lost in the bit hard just after tour in general because we were just being crazy people to entertain each other, and I just like then went home for Christmas, and I was saying things that my family was like, Jesus Christ. Keep in mind, like they I am pulling myself in front of my family. like They know everything, but even they were like, okay, that is crass. Can you stop? Crass, they use that word? Like what? No, but I just like that word. What were you saying? I said crass.
00:28:01
Speaker
No, what were you saying that was so crass? um What was it? I mean, I can't remember. That was years ago. That was months ago. It was like last year. It was like last year. Last week. Yes, true. I just I think I was just being a lot more inappropriate. Like I was probably making a little too many sex jokes or something. Which my parents do because they think they're hilarious. But I normally don't.
00:28:30
Speaker
And then I forgot my audience on some instances. I totally get it. You got lost in the bed at the double date, because you ended up looking at the guy that you hated, but you were on a double date with him. Well, ah ultimately, I just got horny and said, you know what? You can come in.
00:28:47
Speaker
Yeah, once you like get enough drinks in you, it's kind of like I get it. Yeah. like Sometimes you just need to get laid, and if I put in the work, why not? Why not? we Put him in the work. Yeah. Yeah. What else do you want? So yeah, those are just a couple times I can think of off the top of my head in the last few months.
Building Community: Women Supporting Women
00:29:10
Speaker
If you could make one one life decision for every girl in their 20s, what would it be?
00:29:16
Speaker
Make sure you build a like put effort and like prioritize building a community of women around you. preach. So like, even if you have like a boyfriend or something, do you do have to prioritize? Like you don't want that to be your only priority. I feel like because in your twenties, you like need that massive, I think you need a community always, but I think like the foundation of those communities a lot of times happens in your twenties. And those are friends you can take through your whole life with you, even after like you do things like I did and like freaking move in with my boyfriend.
00:29:46
Speaker
And those are the most important because like I love my friends that have known me through all my phases and stuck with it. It's just like stuck with it. It's just nice to have some consistency throughout.
00:30:00
Speaker
well honestly i just feel like no one should be your everything like i don't want to be joe's everything like if i was everything to him like i would feel so much pressure and if he was everything to me then he would feel so much pressure like you're not supposed to fulfill everyone's needs and wants and desires like you you can find friendships that do that family relationships that do that. So I feel like it's important to, that's why I use the word community because you can rely on different people for different things. I think it's really unhealthy to assume like your significant other is going to be everything for you. yeah It's just a lot. It's a lot of responsibility for one person. Yeah, I would encourage people to.
00:30:41
Speaker
stay single to be honest.
00:30:46
Speaker
I would say I don't even want to make this like a broad statement like everyone should but I'll say for me personally I feel like for a lot of my 20s I felt like I wanted to be the cool girl in every area of my life like in my friendships and my work life and my relationships what I mean by the cool girl is like yeah I don't care or like Yeah, I don't wanna bring this up to him, because like i want I want him to think like I'm not jealous or at work being like, yeah, I don't like need to talk about like this money thing that's really important to me. I think the cool girl got me absolutely nowhere, and I was so stagnant in so many areas of my life, in my 20s for years at a time, because I was just like not wanting to ruffle feathers. And I can honestly say that got me absolutely nowhere, and I feel like right now in my life,
00:31:38
Speaker
I have such great boundaries around not having to put myself in a position to be there. So like in, you know, dating, it's like bringing stuff up right away. um Does it matter how early I am or not like, oh, hey, I didn't like that. Or, hey, could you do this instead? Or like at work, advocating for myself and my friendships. If that means taking space from a friendship that I feel like just isn't really there for me right now. I don't need to like be friends with everyone. I don't need everyone to like me. I don't need for, you know, in my, cause they had just end up really for in my experience. I just feel like I haven't been respected in a way that I should. And I feel like that really held me back as like thinking that I had to be cool and chill about things. And I just feel like that really got me.
00:32:25
Speaker
But also, I feel like it does a disservice to people who want to get to know you. Exactly. Because they're not getting to know you. They're getting to know like what you think other people want, which is just not you. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. And then you just like get the short end of the stick. like I've had friends who like have other friends with great boundaries. And they'd be like, oh, hey, sorry. I accidentally double booked myself. But I know my other friend is actually going to be really mad if I cancel on her. So do you mind if I just like I can't hang out tonight and it's like, oh, she respects the other person and like knows she'll be, you know what I mean? It's just like situations where they're not like, oh yeah, you want to be cool about this. But it's like, I actually won't anymore. But that's also like been a huge shock to a lot of my friendships. Yeah. So making the adjustment is tough. But if you just are already like that, it's just like better. I feel like I just yeah rambled. but
00:33:18
Speaker
I think that's a really good one.
Making Friends in NYC: Tips and Strategies
00:33:20
Speaker
This lovely lady says she's lonely and NYC help. I try so hard to get myself out there, but it's so disappointing. I feel like New York is one of those places where there's so many like random events going on from like brands and influencers and stuff like that. Like there's always like a podcast live show going on or like, um, I see like there's this one girl I follow, Margo Lee. This is like such a random example, but it's just like an example.
00:33:46
Speaker
she does like She has this journal called No Particular Order and she does like journaling like seminars and it seems like you could just sign up to go to one and like you just sit and talk with like-minded people. So I feel like there's a lot of events like that based on if you're following people in the New York area. Yeah, I don't know like where I heard this or if this is actually a thing, but I've heard about just like Creativity can bring people together and I feel like that is so true in the way that I met people in l LA like because of blogging I have a ton of friends if not like I've met people through them or whatever like we just had so many opportunities to go to events and all of that so honestly I would encourage like if you're not if you're not
00:34:33
Speaker
into the blogging thing or going to events or anything like that take like acting classes or like stand up or like something that you guys are you know kind of brings people like a random group together and you can meet random friends and it's not like you going up to them cold. You know what I mean? I was trying to look up this thing. I think it was called like 11 11. Um, but there's like these like dinner parties that are like pop up dinner parties. I know they have them in LA. I think there's some in New York, but let's see. I've only done one.
00:35:11
Speaker
event for note to self that's like was like a cocktail hour but the girls in Chicago that went like really liked it and I think they like stayed in touch and it was like a good way to meet like-minded people. Also complementing people I feel like that's the easiest intro into a conversation if I like something even remotely even if I'm not obsessed with it but there's like someone I want to talk to or like whatever I'll be like oh I like your shoes or something like that I feel like That's the best way to approach someone if you do want to like approach them a little more coldly. um Yeah.
00:35:47
Speaker
I also think utilizing like friends of friends. So I've been in l LA a lot where like I had a friend who introduced me to someone that they know in l LA and like she didn't have a ton of friends there yet either. So we met and we like ended up hanging out for like a couple of years on it until she moved. So like, I think stuff like that's also, it can, I can feel weird, but like just not going, like if any of your friends know anyone in New York or if their friends know anyone in New York, just like making friends that way.
00:36:13
Speaker
i have a friend that just moved to new york and doesn't have any friends and so um she put on her close friends like hey like honestly you know a little embarrassing um looking for friends in new york if you know anyone whatever So I ended up setting up my two friends who just moved to New York on a friendship date for once. So like using your close friends and maybe like strategically adding people who you know might know people in New York. And then also like hanging out at like bars and stuff. Go grab a drink one night, walk there, like romanticize your life as we always say.
Current Obsessions: Food and TV Shows
00:36:48
Speaker
So this is not going to be like the LA uber black situation, but this is actually going to be a walking down the street smoking a cigarette. Even if you don't smoke cigarettes, light it and hold it in your hand. I couldn't like stress this more. You need to be every time in New York and I need to romanticize my life. I don't smoke cigarettes. I will actually hold it and walk down the street and like not even inhaling because I'll obviously cough my fucking lungs up.
00:37:12
Speaker
But go to a bar somewhere that's fun and just like order a drink and see what happens. That's also so. But be safe. Such good low key advice. I have met the greatest people in the smoking sections of bars and clubs. I'm sorry. But if you even if you don't smoke and you want to like low key key in the smoking lounge, if you're at some like bougie pool club, like I'm sorry, but that's the place to do it, baby.
00:37:42
Speaker
yeah Also, to follow up from what you were guys were saying about like leaning on friends and friends of friends, I swear that was like my favorite part of moving to l LA. I would just like reach out to people of friends and friends of friends of friends and be like, Okay. This is like a perfect excuse. I just moved here. This isn't weird. We can say it's also like so fun. It reminds me of when like I went to college and I would be like, it was like me and my, one of my best friends Laurel and.
00:38:14
Speaker
Laurel and I would go visit University of Texas. I went to Texas A&M. We'd go visit University of Texas. And like her best friend was friends with like one of my girlfriends from home or something. And Laurel's from Houston. So our little world got so small because we'd be like, oh, Kimberly's friends with my best friend. And it was just such a weird little world. So it's kind of fun when you can like meet like your friend's yeah sister's ah best friend or something because it's like a weird like kind of like It gives you more context. Yeah, it's actually really interesting. like That's kind of how I met my friend, Kimberly. And I met her through Laurel, and then now like I'll go to New York, and I see Kimberly probably more than Laurel like ever does. But it's because she's my New York like girl. New York friend, yeah. I feel like all my friends of friends just like bond over how like fucking like weird I am or something. like Every time I have like friends meet other friends,
00:39:11
Speaker
they just like shit on me. And I'm like, OK, if this is how you guys want to go about this, like I'm fine with it, as long as you're front. Wait, actually?
00:39:20
Speaker
Yeah, not shit on me fully, but just I think. She's like, we love Kristen. She's a fucking weirdo, huh? Isn't she like that? She's crazy. Yeah, just pointing out my quirks that they probably didn't.
00:39:36
Speaker
even realize other people noticed or something. Like, I feel like it's like... Not in like a mean way. It's like, look at her quirky. I mean, you know what I'm talking about because you've met Jesse, haven't you, P? Yes. Yeah. I don't know. I feel like that's just like how it is. Like, I feel like I'm just the... I don't know. Nevermind. Doesn't make sense.
00:39:59
Speaker
and I think it makes sense. It makes sense. You're a talking point to bring people closer together about your craziness sometimes. Yeah, I think it's just like a little easier to have something to talk about, to talk shit about. Just joking. What are your girl's current hyper-fixations?
00:40:22
Speaker
For right now, my current hyper-fixation is having a crush. um Still been strong. Best thing that's ever happened to me, makes the world a brighter place, all those things. um So sorry for everyone that doesn't have one.
00:40:38
Speaker
ah
00:40:41
Speaker
um Oh, I go through phases, um like month-long phases, where I need crab legs every second of every... I wake up thinking about crab legs.
00:40:52
Speaker
and go to sleep thinking about crab legs. I eat them for a breakfast, lunch, dinner, and I'm in a phase where I like need crab legs again. it it It goes back and forth between talk street tacos from like a taco truck and crab legs, and right now, obviously, one is way more expensive than the other, so it's like kind of annoying when I get in this hyper fixation, but you know girls gotta eat. so Yeah, girls gotta eat.
00:41:17
Speaker
I would say I'm hyper fixated on these cookies that got sent to me. It's this frozen cookie dough called a hot take dough. You tried them already? Yes. Oh, are they amazing? i just got I just got mine yesterday. So fucking good. You do nothing. you They're frozen. you I only made three, so I still have some left. But you just put the dough that's already portioned out onto the tray. You don't squish it. Don't touch it. No way. Bake it. It bakes into the most perfect cookie you've ever seen. And they're almost even better when they're like a day old.
00:41:49
Speaker
Really? Like they're unbelievable. They're so good. I'm going to obviously make those. these are Yeah, literally. Yeah, they home like they sent us these ah cookies. So shout out to Hot Take. Hot Take. Yeah, we love you girls. I want to be full stopped. They're so good. Food wise, is my hyper current hyper fixations are fried egg bagel sandwich with kettle jalapeno chips on it.
00:42:18
Speaker
Then Amacha, bacon, egg, and Gouda, always my sweet fin bowl, cigarettes, puffs, bars, joints.
00:42:33
Speaker
um I think that's about it. um What else is mine? Oh my god, wait, Kristen, we didn't talk about our hyper-fixation meal. We have one that we eat like every time we hang out. Oh, yeah, puppy tacos.
00:42:46
Speaker
No, this so and and the the one I make, I make this salmon and um either right rice quinoa or whatever I have in broccoli. And we just really fuck buck it up with all the sauces and shit. It's so good. Honestly, I might not have that for dinner. That's my one of my home homemade fixations. I also homemade my bagel sandwiches, not the bagels, obviously.
00:43:13
Speaker
All right. Well, okay. My last one I think is like, I've been rewatching all the sex in the city, but then I've been hate watching
TV Analysis: 'Sex and the City' and Beyond
00:43:20
Speaker
recently and just like that because I hate Miranda even more than I hate her insects in the city in and just like that. She, it's like, here's a thing. Her sex scenes I never liked. I never liked them. And then, and and just like that she's,
00:43:45
Speaker
I'm trying to decide how much I want to go in on her. She's even more insufferable. She's even more hideous outfits and then so mismatched with her partner.
00:43:59
Speaker
I know. It's such a mismatch. It just doesn't make sense. I don't know what Miranda is supposed to represent. Every character has something they represent. Is she supposed to be type A extremely career driven? Because the other girls are career driven. I feel like Charlotte's type A. So what is very rigid? Is she supposed to be the really rigid one? But then she cheats on Steve. What is she representing?
00:44:30
Speaker
It's just not very obvious to me. I feel like that character wasn't developed enough, unless it's just going over my head. Or she's representing the lesbians, but I don't think she is. Or is she representing that people just hate women for no reason sometimes? yeah I have reasons for outfits. Just like that and just like that is such a hate watch. so I love it because I love the character so much that I'm grasping on for any content I can get from them.
00:45:01
Speaker
but You know what's weird about me? I was not a big Sex in the City girl. I haven't seen, like I would say, the majority of the episodes, and I've never seen it just like that. I think you really need to start rewatching Sex in the City. it is I relate to it more the older I get. So this would be a perfect age. Yeah. It's so therapeutic, and yeah it's literally therapy.
00:45:28
Speaker
I feel like I get the the storyline. like I understand the episodes I've seen. I do get that. But like the way that you're annoyed by Miranda, Miranda doesn't annoy me, but Carrie annoys the fuck out of me. It's really hard for me to watch her for- Totally. Yeah. It's also like a coming of age thing of like when you're younger, you're not annoyed by Carrie, and then you get older and you're like, there's just no way. But what I like about it is that I feel like up until that point their age group which they're like 34, 35, 36 in these episodes was always represented as married, life together, kids and this was like the first show ever where they're going out, they're having martinis, they're not actually really relating to the other women their age because they're like they're yeah and like they're just single and actually really happy about and like secure in being single at their age and like
00:46:17
Speaker
to give it to Miranda is successful, Samantha is successful. Everyone's just like fucking killing it and they're going to lunch in the middle of the day on a Tuesday. So it's just like romanticizing being in your mid thirties, being best friends with your best friends and not actually like yearning for a relationship. Yeah, I enjoy that about it. And I totally get that point. I just am annoyed. Like I don't want to watch something and be annoyed.
00:46:41
Speaker
Carrie's insufferable. Yes. Yes. Growing up is realizing Carrie's actually the the most insufferable one. She's so annoying to me. Her and Mr. Big are like, you guys need to get off the show. You know what I watched? I watched the wedding dress one when she like started like freaking out and like was like, get it off of me, like having like a panic attack. As a person who has panic attacks, I'm like, I should understand this. But I'm also just like, you're so annoying to me right now in this moment.
00:47:06
Speaker
I mean, I don't know if you know this, but like in the first movie or maybe the second big leaves her at the altar and she ends up understanding it like, yeah, you know, me and big were just like not really meant for marriage.
00:47:19
Speaker
And she forgives him and just stays with him because she's like, I shouldn't have pressured it. She's at the wedding in the dress. Yeah. All the major news covering this, all her family and friends. And then they somehow like forgive him. Her friends. Yeah. No, he sucks. Oh, I do know that Aiden was like the best one. Yeah. Aiden's the best. I'd fuck and he's hot. Yep. Yeah.
00:47:45
Speaker
Yeah.
Behind the Scenes: Podcasting Bloopers
00:47:46
Speaker
Kristen, I think we're going to have to crop your video, because I feel like I've just been able to see what could be your crotch the entire time. We'll see. Maybe I wanted that in. Maybe. Maybe I'm trying to get more views, and maybe I would do anything for it. Iman, we could talk about your sister ah shaming you in front of your mom for not being able to take dick.
00:48:13
Speaker
Okay. Well, do you want to talk about that? Well, yeah we were like at dinner with my mom, me and my sister, and she talks about like, Oh yeah, me and my friends recently were talking about like this topic from your podcast. And I was like, what was it? And also kind of giving her the look like fuck off. like And she was like, she was basically referencing the time that I said that having a big dick is overrated. And she said that out loud. And in my head, I'm like,
00:48:44
Speaker
Okay, well, don't make my mom think that like I can't. and It was just like fucked up. Like so embarrassing. It was so embarrassing. Like you're just, it, it was telling my mom, I like tiny little dude. Yeah. Like it was ill timed. My mom was staring at her phone, pretending like she actually couldn't hear what we were saying because she was so uncomfortable by the conversation. I was like, yeah, and then you said this. And my friend said this, and I was looking at her like,
00:49:10
Speaker
Shut your goddamn whore mouth now. I am crying. And then at the end, my mom was like, um, yeah, so, uh, okay. And my mom just pretend like she couldn't hear it, but it was just like really fucked up to bring up at the dinner dinner table. What do you girls think? I think that's absolutely inappropriate. So inappropriate. Never ever make my mom think I can't be a big fat dog, okay? Literally never fucking say that in front of my mom again.
00:49:39
Speaker
and but everything boundaries just that is one You're just embarrassed that your mom now thinks you can't handle it. That's what's embarrassing. Yes. It's like, Oh, so she heard that I think, and also I take it back because.
00:49:54
Speaker
She wants to say something. I take it back. Yeah. I think we can all, we all know. Okay. All I have to say is that I take that back and I didn't mean it. I was just.
00:50:09
Speaker
ah You were trying to be um nice to men. Yes, yes. Yeah. And we know you like to do that sometimes. And things are different now. OK. We were trying to up our male listenership. Yeah, didn't mean it. But we have a small dick go back to being embarrassed.
00:50:32
Speaker
Yeah. What she said. Go way back to being embarrassed. What she said. Um, okay. Last but not least,
00:50:43
Speaker
he I want to know what some random quirks are about you
Quirky Habits: Odd Personal Traits
00:50:49
Speaker
guys. And I'm going to tell you a few of mine. Number one, how I make ramen noodles. This is maybe one of the weirdest things. i know It's going to piss me off. It is.
00:51:02
Speaker
I like the square ramen, you know, not the one in the cup. Yeah, me too. Different flavor. but thought What what flavor do you like? chicken obviously. Me too. um So what I do is I boil the water. I do not break up the ramen noodles beforehand. I leave them in a square. I put the raw i put the boiling water over the um ramen just for a few seconds. I flip the side.
00:51:33
Speaker
i Let it sit for another few seconds I drain it so it's now a little bit cooked, but a little bit crunchy um I drained all the water so it's not soup.
00:51:45
Speaker
It's just noodles. No, no. And I knew you were going to lose me. And then I sprinkle the salt on. So what I am now eating is a amazing, it's a amazing texture and flavor common. I couldn't be more obsessed. I can't keep them in the house or I'll just eat that for a meal and I'll forget to like eat nutritious value valuable foods and I love it. Also, one more quick one. I like to warm my chewy bars up. Like when I was little, I used to warm them up in the microwave and like eat them as the mush. So now I do that with my fiber one bars. So anyway, you girls, you got any quirks? It's perfectly painful just as I expected.
00:52:38
Speaker
Well, I have two that I think like are part of my nighttime routine that I feel like, cause all my quirks come out in like my routines, I think. yeah So one, this might be my new found possible diagnosis of OCD because trust me, I've got some people in my dams being like, Oh, I listened to the podcast and I'm an OCD psychiatrist.
00:52:59
Speaker
And I think there's a lot of diagnoses. Yeah. They're like, well, it could also be autism. It could be like ADHD. It could be, used I don't know. yeah Anyway, I have like a, I think for me, the reason sometimes I think about.
00:53:14
Speaker
The autistic side of things is because I have insane sensory processing problems. So like layered anything that makes me want to absolutely die, like a layered shirt over another shirt, like wearing an the idea of wearing like a sh like a tank top under a t-shirt or it's even a shirt underneath like a t-shirt under a sweatshirt like this. I physically can't even think about it or I'm going to throw up and have like a actual panic attack.
00:53:40
Speaker
i Got a line sheet because I think this and her fall. It's like gonna be popular to wear like layered tank tops. I Like couldn't even look at it. Like I was like this. I also have to put lotion on like multiple times a day So like if I take a shower, I have to put some kind of lotion or oil on immediately after That's like and I have to do it in the middle of the day too, but it's like it's good and because it's helpful for your skin, but it's bad when like, if you go without it, you're going to have a mental breakdown. Like you're going to pass away. I can't wash my hands either. Like on a plane, if I don't get on that plane with a lotion and a pen and paper, I like will have like a moment in the air where I'm like, I feel claustrophobic without those things.
00:54:27
Speaker
Yeah, those are your comfort items. I'm the same way. I can't wash my hands unless I have lotion. So like unfortunately, I'm admitting this publicly. If I'm like out somewhere and I don't have lotion, I physically can't wash my hands because if they're dry, I have to go home. Oh, yeah. I can't. Oh my god, no.
00:54:44
Speaker
But I've gone as far as like, I usually bring aqua for as my lip gloss so that if I don't have lotion, I'll just like use the aqua for. I've gone as far as putting lip gloss on my hands because I'm like, I cannot possibly go home right now. But if I keep focusing on this, I will have to go home. I also have this weird thing where if I'm at work and I notice that I have a split end.
00:55:04
Speaker
I'll pull on it, but if I notice I have multiple, I have to go home and cut my hair. I've had multiple times. This is my OCD. like I don't mean this as like, oh yeah, this is OCD, LOL. I mean, like I'm diagnosed with OCD. I have to go home during my lunch break and give myself like a haircut trim if I notice more than three split ends at work, so I have to wear my hair back every single day at work because if I leave it down,
00:55:26
Speaker
I'll mess with it, mess with it, see you split end, have to go home at lunch. and Not only do I have to go home, but like I have to go home right then, so I'll take it early. If I'm like playing with my hair, the second I take my clock clip out and start to like think I'm going to play with my hair, I've already lost the plot. I already have to go home.
00:55:42
Speaker
And like, I hate when I do that because it's so annoying that I have to do it, but there's nothing in me that can not do it. So yeah. Split on things bad. It's a compulsion and I have to do it like right when I think about it. Same with if I look at the mirror, I have a little bit of a unibrow and like I've been deciding that it's bothering me. Sometimes I like having a unibrow. I decide that it's bothering me. I have to go home. What else do I have that with? You just have to go home. All roads lead to home. Yeah. All roads lead to me have to going home.
00:56:12
Speaker
You should start carrying a purse. Oh, you know what? i can't work yeah That's a quirk. a quirk, but Iman does not carry a purse. Anything I can fit in my pockets. She just comes empty-handed.
00:56:30
Speaker
If I can't fit it in my pocket, then I don't need to bring it. It's the greatest thing I've ever seen. Because I lose everything. You could put all that stuff in it and you wouldn't have to go home. Have you ever seen me with a credit card one day of my life? You've never seen me put down my ... My debit card is at Frida's in Beverly Hills since last August.
00:56:52
Speaker
That's before that, before that. That was the day that I lost it the day before. So since August 18th, so exactly a year in like 10 day or I don't want to age. It's actually since before it was you we you lost that are left that at that Mexican restaurant, which is, by the way, really close to our house. Super easy place to just go by and grab it. Maybe 10, 12 minutes. You lost that before Joe and I ever even reconnected at all.
00:57:18
Speaker
Yeah, so over a year ago, I left my debit card at Frieda Beverly Hills and I have not gone back to get it. I have not gotten a new debit card. I use Apple Pay if I can't use Apple Pay. I'm shit out of luck. I often can't pay my parking meter because i if it doesn't take Apple Pay, I don't have any physical cards because I don't know where they are ever. so i risk it I risked it because my parking meter didn't take Apple Pay. crazy And that's why I can't carry a purse, because if I lose my purse, I lose everything at once. If I bring out like just my ID and whatever, I lose one thing, but I've lost a purse probably 10 times. Yeah, I mean, I've lost a purse.
00:57:59
Speaker
That is insane. I can't survive without a purse. I never lose my cards or anything like that. I just have my shit together. I have my head held on. And you've been to jail. And you've been to jail twice. Yeah, in my adolescence. Now, now look at me. Yeah, right. Look at you. Thriving. Thriving. Thriving. Now look at me. yeah Now look at you.
00:58:27
Speaker
and Okay, well, I think that wraps this one up, ah ladies. but We've got a special guest for the outro. This is Barbara Richie.
00:58:39
Speaker
give Wait, I have one really, really important thing I need to say. Oh, okay. Shoot. Okay. so