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Three Reasons Why You Are Sabotaging Your Progress image

Three Reasons Why You Are Sabotaging Your Progress

E5 · Fit Femme Project Alignment Podcast
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66 Plays1 year ago

This weeks episode Coach Nicole tells us three reasons why we may be sabotaging our progress toward our health and fitness goals. 

Instagram: @thefitfemmeproject

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/fitfemmeprojectfitnesscoaching/

Website: www.fitfemmeproject.com

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Transcript

Masterclass Announcement

00:00:09
Speaker
Hey FFP fam, before we begin this week's episode, I have some FFP news to share with you. This Thursday inside of our private Facebook group, we are hosting a free masterclass with our beautiful coaches. Our topic is rewiring the brain and aligning the central nervous system, going to be super cool. And we will be speaking to some current clients of the FitVem project to hear their personal stories as well. Again, it's gonna be super cool and informative. So I encourage you to click the link in the show notes to join our Facebook group. See you there.

Podcast Introduction

00:00:42
Speaker
Welcome to the FitFem project alignment podcast. It is here that we cultivate and gather all who have been through it in fitness, relationships, careers, lifestyle changes, and unforgettable crucial life pivots trying to achieve their most sovereign selves.
00:00:59
Speaker
We're here to provide you with thought-provoking detailed stories and information from truly fascinating men and women from all walks of life, professions, generations, and modern day sagas who speak to the rawest, darkest moments that made them the strong, decisive, humble, helpful, healing people that they are today. We ask them to hold nothing back because life is a multidimensional pursuit to be stronger, healthier, and more aligned mentally, emotionally, and physically. Let's go.

Self-Sabotaging Health Goals

00:01:32
Speaker
Welcome back to the pod today. Nicole and I are telling you three reasons why you are sabotaging your health and fitness goals and what you can do to help move yourself through these three obstacles. Super fun topic today. How are you doing, girl? Good. So I sound like a little drainy because I just might something's up with my sinuses. So
00:01:55
Speaker
Excuse that. Oh, you sound fine. You look great. Oh, thank you. Yeah, so what do you have for us today?
00:02:04
Speaker
So we were talking about self-sabotage and we had mentioned how that's such an important topic and we could probably talk about that for several episodes, but it's, it's such a big, I think it's one of the biggest reasons why a lot of women will come to the FitFem project, but also it's one of the biggest reasons they want to figure out on how to like reach their fitness goals and, but keep the results. Yeah. Right. They, they,
00:02:31
Speaker
Everyone a lot of times knows how to lose weight. The majority of people, not everyone wants to lose weight, but keeping it off. Having a successful diet where you don't have to lose the weight again. That piece hasn't been quite figured out.
00:02:51
Speaker
That was a reason like that's what we see almost with nearly everyone. So talking about that today is definitely like I'm glad we're talking about it today. Yeah, like you said, there's probably 80 things, 80 topics within this topic that we could go on. So we decided to like kind of pick a couple with what we have. Have you experienced any of these like
00:03:13
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. So I was looking at like kind of the list we have about what we're going to talk about today. And I was like, you know, there are different stages in my own health and fitness where I was going through them at a different time. So like, okay, for instance, when I first started kind of getting serious about losing weight when I was in the Navy,
00:03:32
Speaker
Um, I didn't know a lot. So I would, I think I had, I think at first I would follow diets and magazines and eventually I hired a coach, but even when I had hired my first. Sorry. Yeah. It's like women's health. Yeah. But, um,
00:03:48
Speaker
I would follow what was, you know, the protocol that was stated either with the coach I was with or, you know, if it was a magazine Monday through Friday. Yeah. And then it's like I would just forget. I was like, oh, I can eat a little bit more. I can drink a little bit more. And I was in the Navy. So on the sailor, you drink like one, didn't you?
00:04:10
Speaker
But, um, you know, and that's, you know, but then of course the next week, you're not losing weight or you check in with your coach and like, Oh, I didn't lose weight. Cause I didn't track anything over the weekend and oh, alcohol, you have to track that too. And no, I didn't drink enough water. Yeah. I didn't, I didn't get enough sleep over the weekend. Oh, all this is important. And so that's one of the things that, um, is something to take a look at. If you feel like you are.
00:04:37
Speaker
not getting the results you want on a consistent weekly basis, I would say take a look at, you know, kind of the basics, knowledge base. Yeah. Like, are you are you tracking everything? Do you have an awareness of, you know, how much food or drinks or liquids you're drinking?

Tracking for Goal Alignment

00:04:54
Speaker
How's your sleep? Where's your water? The more you learn that the more you'll be able to fit how all see how all that will fit into your life.
00:05:02
Speaker
Right. So just the education part of it. Like that, I think that is the majority of people because yeah, we'll follow the magazine diets or I'll even see stuff on like Instagram that are like that belongs in a magazine. Like these three easy exercises to get you in shape. Like, no.
00:05:21
Speaker
So that was definitely my experience for sure was the lack of education. And then also too, we often know what to do. You know what I mean? Like we know what's good for us, but then putting that puzzle together is where that people often lack. Like where does the water fit in? Where does the sleep fit in? What kind of workouts are good for me? So that's what gets overwhelming to people. And I think that too, because of that overwhelm,
00:05:50
Speaker
people are just like, forget it. Yep. Yeah. Um, I was just thinking too, when I was back, when I was first starting, I would just
00:06:01
Speaker
carry a gallon of water with me because someone said I should. Did you drink from it? Yeah, I would. Just carry the gallon around. I'm cool. I was like, I'm serious about my fitness. But I started to resent it down the road because I didn't fully understand why
00:06:24
Speaker
I need to be drinking as much water as I was drinking. And so education, that piece is really important to understand why you are ensuring you get enough sleep, why you're ensuring you're eating well enough, why you need to ensure that you're moving your body in a way that's going to support the you know, support the goals you've got, why exercise in general is good. But yeah, the education piece, the, you know,
00:06:49
Speaker
you don't necessarily need to go become get you know, get a master's degree in exercise nutrition, but you do need to be informed of your own body and what it's capable of and what it needs, even above what you want, in order to be able to make headway. So are you saying like, aside from education of like, how good water is for you, how much you should drink, like, aside from that, like,
00:07:16
Speaker
teaching yourself about yourself so right like okay how much water like taking a step aside from you and removing judgment of course and saying like how much water am i really drinking and then you start kind of tracking it being like oh i thought i actually drank a lot but it looks like i'm not yeah
00:07:36
Speaker
So I think that is another element of the education process of like, because when I first started working with Zoe with the fitment project, she would have me start track and I kind of loosely tracked before that but it was one overwhelming and also you don't want to like
00:07:54
Speaker
face that reality sometimes, oftentimes, right?

Emotional Eating & Coping Mechanisms

00:07:58
Speaker
So she would just be like, you know, there's no judgment. Like, let's just see, like, what your habits are, where your fats are, where your protein is at, just the everyday things that you're eating, like, oh, okay, that's easy enough. It turns out, I was like, wow, I could easily eat 100 grams of that a day. So I think that's a difficult part for people to face is
00:08:19
Speaker
being real with where their habits are. Removing the judgment is really good. That's an important part because that's why I avoided it. That's why I avoid looking at my bank account because I don't want to see how much I'm spending. It's the same thing. Yeah, it is. Yeah, and that's, you know, having someone with you who
00:08:38
Speaker
shows you what non-judgment looks and feels like, I think is huge. I think that was one reason why I love coaching so much is because you're with someone, or in that community at least, you're there with others who know what you're going through, what you may have to face, what you have to feel. Whenever you're making any change, whether it's a community of people in the fitness world, if you're trying to be more fit or if you're trying to save money, you know, or budget or something like that.
00:09:06
Speaker
Yeah, that's true. Trying to look at what you're doing without judgment is, that can't be understated. Yeah. And the education part just in general, it can be overwhelming. So we've talked, we'll talk about this, we talked about it before, we'll talk about it again. The basics.
00:09:22
Speaker
And that's where it's at. I've told this story before where I just started drinking water and all of a sudden I was seeing results and it just kind of snowballed into healthier habits without even feeling like I wasn't pressuring myself into these other healthier habits because I felt better. I was like, well, let's go to that workout class. Why not?
00:09:42
Speaker
So I think, again, the basics and the basics will get you pretty far. Yeah, I was just thinking I had a I was working. What I like to do with some of the women I work with is, you know, I'll lay out the basics like, listen, we got to get some water in, we got to get some good sleep in. We'll just see where you're at. You know, maybe because a lot of times they're getting plenty of sleep.
00:10:02
Speaker
They like drinking water. They love moving their body. But it's the stress management or the eating well enough or even eating enough that is kind of like that's where they're they're struggling. So but pointing out to them, hey, but you're you know, you're able to you were able to make these decisions over the weekend because you got so much sleep over the week, you know, because you increased your water a little bit like that's fantastic. And so when they can see a pattern like that in themselves and how easy it was for them, it encourages them to
00:10:31
Speaker
want to look at where it's a struggle for them like the nutrition and That's a really good flow forward for them So I heard where I was going with that Yeah, educating yourself well not edgy just educating yourself means like I would say oh
00:10:53
Speaker
you know, books, find people who know what they're doing. So I have that reminds me of something that I just experienced last night. So this is like perfect for what we're talking about. So Mark's family is in town and his brother's girlfriend
00:11:08
Speaker
and I were and she she's CrossFit like five times a week, Zumba three times a week. Like, I'm like, you're doing way too much. And I'm like, what are your calories? She's like 1800. Like, all right, like, I'm not an expert. But anyway, so she was telling me that this coach, I don't think she's paying them. It's just like somebody at her gym or something.
00:11:32
Speaker
Her coach was like, you need to eat more protein, like more of the protein, like good style, like he's telling her good advice, like more protein. So she started eating more peanut butter.
00:11:41
Speaker
I died live. It was so funny because she would get the Costco sized peanut butter. And she's like, yeah, I would. That's what I would have in the morning with my banana. I'm like, okay, you know, it's not that bad. Like it was high and fat, but it's what you want. And then I'd go home, put my smoothie and all this stuff. And she's like, I would go through a tub of that Costco sized peanut butter in one week.
00:12:05
Speaker
Yeah, that's it. So I was like, I will say that I was like, girl, you like it. So I was telling her and luckily I had just I had gone to Whole Foods and went straight to his apartment where they were at. So I had a little bag of food with me. And I needed to buy some of the PB fit. Okay.
00:12:22
Speaker
the powdered peanut butter. And I was like, Oh, so I ran to my bed. I was like, Look, have you ever heard of this stuff? She goes, No, I'm like, this is only 70 calories, two tablespoons of regular peanut butter is like 190, 200 calories. And so I showed her the difference. I'm like, that's what because she started gaining weight. And she's been busting her ass. And I'm like, this
00:12:44
Speaker
Like that was just like opened up for her. It was so funny. So I was like, let me mix this up for you with some water. Like Mark is like super skeptical of it. Like mixing something with water sounds, but I'm like, it is literally the same thing. Let me show you. So I mixed up for her and I had her taste. She's like, what? Like, yeah, you can get Costco size of this, you know? Like, like your world has now changed because like we were just in a regular conversation. I was like, girl, no, stop with the peanut butter.
00:13:13
Speaker
Yeah, that's, that's perfect example. Like you, she, well, I mean, you reached out to her, thankfully, but like, she had someone in her life that was able to just, you know, show her like, Hey, there's, there's, you know, maybe

Behavioral Patterns & Lifestyle Improvement

00:13:26
Speaker
another way. That's something else. Yeah, she was like, this has changed my life. I'm like,
00:13:31
Speaker
Anytime that I told her about the protein cereal, the magic spoon, I was like, you like cereal? Yeah. She's like, they're always begging me because she has a little girl and then two older kids. They're always begging me to get, especially the little girl, the fruity cereal. I was like, look it, they have this.
00:13:47
Speaker
This is not an ad, but it totally should be. The fruity cereal is gluten-free, grain-free, blah, blah, blah, all this stuff, and it's really good. She's like, what? I'm like, yeah, it's a little more expensive than a regular box of cereal, but it's what you...
00:14:03
Speaker
You feel better about feeding that to your kids because it's higher in protein, like no sugar, technically. Anyway, so yeah, I was like, text me in 10 if you have more ideas. That actually gives me an idea in case anyone doesn't know. If you like cereal but you don't know how to get your protein in, mix some vanilla protein powder with water and that becomes your milk for your bowl of cereal.
00:14:23
Speaker
So if you haven't tried that yet, it's brilliant. Give it a try. It's delicious, too. That's a good idea. Mm hmm. Anyway, this is not a movie and recipe podcast. Although we do have good ideas. All right. Anyway, so education. So what's that? What's another one we can.
00:14:45
Speaker
Number two. Okay, so for sabotage, this is probably the biggest one that I see is using food to cope with very strong emotions. So this is like when I was saying at the beginning, when I was thinking about my my own journey, when I first started with my own health and fitness, when I was a few years in,
00:15:12
Speaker
I realized that I was, you know, even though I was starting to learn more, I knew about nutrition. I was getting more familiar with it. I was working out. I was drinking water. Um, I was still, I think my binge eating was developing and I did not realize I needed education on that, on the mental, emotional tie-in behind our behavior. And so I didn't have that, but also when, if food
00:15:41
Speaker
is becoming or has become your only method of coping with overwhelming emotions, such as maybe guilt or shame or embarrassment or grief or sadness and loneliness. It could even be joy. Some people are very like their pride. For instance, they feel uncomfortable with feeling proud of themselves. If food is your only coping mechanism, then that's I would say like you need to look into that. Just get some more information on that because it doesn't have to be that way.
00:16:10
Speaker
right. So but that's one of the one of the biggest reasons. One of the biggest things I help a lot of women with sabotage is they're like, I just, I was, you know, bored one day, I don't know why I always go to food, they beat themselves up whenever they use food. And it's, it's just like you said, at the beginning, removing that self judgment as honestly, the
00:16:33
Speaker
Yeah, that's one of the biggest pieces once because if you think about it if you didn't judge yourself You would how much easier life would be? Yeah in general you'd be like in those moments when you feel an emotion be like, okay I can handle this and you'd go move on do something else but no that negative that self-judgment a very critical way is I think the thing that keeps people stuck a lot. Yeah, what's
00:16:57
Speaker
Did you ever had like experiences or clients that kind of were in denial that they would use food as a coping mechanism? Yeah, I was one of them. I just I yeah, I was one of them. I've had I've worked with some women who who kind of knew it.
00:17:14
Speaker
But when it came down to talk about it, they would deviate or want to talk about something else. And that lets me know, like, I'm not the person for them where they're not ready or they need to, you know, maybe go see, um, a mental health, uh, someone who's licensed with that if they want, but it's not all, it just, you got to work with someone and find out where they're like.
00:17:36
Speaker
you know, they have to trust you as well. They want to talk about uncomfortable stuff. That's why the emotions come up and they're using food rather than talking about it or even maybe stepping outside or calling someone. So do you have an example of like somebody that you were able to walk through that process with? Oh, yes, I do it all the time. So working through a tough emotion or do you mean someone who didn't like
00:18:02
Speaker
Um, I guess kind of both, like if you kind of saw the signs of that being a problem using the emotion or food to cover the emotions, things like that. And then you were there to kind of coach them through it, kind of see the light and then to kind of move past that. Yeah. How's that been? Yeah. So that, that I do all the time with my client, with the women I work with, like they, um, let's see. I'm trying to think of one of the latest ones. There was.
00:18:32
Speaker
Yeah. So one of the women I was working with, this happens a lot with, uh, they're tired during the week. So they skip a workout. So they feel really guilty and the guilt is enough to get them to maybe skip the workout the next day or later that day to start nibbling and start eating off plan. And they don't realize it's the guilt, but they'll come to me, say, I just ate off plan. I was nibbling on this. I don't know why. And I feel so guilty about that. And so.
00:19:00
Speaker
the way I coached them through it, it's a lot of backtracking and then figuring out like where the initiating kind of impulse was and looking at the facts. And then once there's enough clarity, they can see, oh, you know, I was feeling guilty about skipping a workout. Oh, it's because I was tired because I slept three hours the night before. And then that's where, you know, just talking it out with someone else helps them feel less guilty about maybe wanting to
00:19:28
Speaker
you know, just not work out. Maybe they needed a rest day and hearing from a coach or hearing from someone who's been there saying, Hey, you need a rest. It's fine. If you need to move your workouts another day, that's fine. Even if you don't need to, even if you don't work out, you complete that workout this week, it'll be fine. Um, because what they're going through, like they want to get to the point where they're not facing that obstacle where they're not having to decide
00:19:54
Speaker
with whether they're not feeling guilty for one about missing a workout at all, but they're not like they want to be able to get to the point where if they are tired, they can make the decision to go do something, but they feel so stuck with where they're at because if they skip a workout, they think the whole diet's gone like that they're that they're broke. Yeah. And so but they have to go through kind of a phase
00:20:20
Speaker
Um, where they have to give themselves grace and not beat themselves up and learn what that, what that kind of feels like and say, Hey, it's, you know, if I have weeks like this, it's okay. Um, so that's kind of how I work through it. It's like, we kind of find patterns and I'll work through

Support Systems in Fitness

00:20:36
Speaker
it with them. They're going to be on the call with me and I ask them questions. Cause then once they see me do it, then they can do it on their own. Um, and then.
00:20:45
Speaker
you know, I'll ask them, okay, well, you know, if you're thinking this way, in this particular moment, how does that make you feel? Oh, it makes you feel guilty. And what do you notice you do when you feel guilty? They'll say, Oh, I just shut down, I'll go inward, I will, you know, I'll go seek food. And I'll just calmly ask them, okay, well, what does that create for you? What's the outcome of that? And then they'll see, Oh, the outcome is, you know, I didn't make progress. And it's all not, it's all like,
00:21:12
Speaker
zero judgment at all. And once they see it laid out, like, kind of factually, like, this is normal, like, yeah, look at the facts here, it really is. And then then I'll ask, all right, well, you know, we look at the facts, and then they'll be like, Oh, I didn't have to think about it this way. And I'm like, you're absolutely right. How could you think about it in a way that helps you or serves you? And then they're like, well,
00:21:30
Speaker
Or I'll ask them like, what would it look like if this was easy? And then they'll instantly they come up with the answers themselves. And then you can see good question. It is. And they, um, but you know, you can see their body posture change, like their eyes light up, their shoulders go back, like they feel confidence come in. They're like, Oh, I can't do it. And then it literally flows from there. And that, but then that new, like thought needs to be repeated. And that's where we come up with little ways. Like we work together to like, say, Hey, remember, you know, every Thursday you tend to feel this way.
00:22:00
Speaker
but we're prepared for it this time so let's start incorporating other ways to help you move through these moments. I think this is where people can give themselves grace is that when you're breaking that
00:22:16
Speaker
that brain connection the synapse connection in your brain like you're literally changing your brain chemistry when you're trying to get rid of like habits that you've used for who knows how long yeah and that is difficult and it's okay it's not gonna be easy the first time you're learning a new skill really just like with learning to
00:22:35
Speaker
Skate, you know Yeah, so that actually reminds me of a little a moment that I never forgot about For a really long time and it relates to what we're talking about when I was in elementary school There was this assistant teacher elementary school like this was so long. Yeah, I don't know why I remember this moment But our assistant teacher, Mrs. Hanson, I loved her We were at the pumpkin patch we always went every every fall is a great pumpkin patch in Nebraska and
00:23:05
Speaker
And I was sitting across from her looking at her, she was eating just a little snack bag of chips. She's talking about she was on a diet. And she's just like, she's like, I gotta stop now. But she just kept eating these chips. It wasn't like a huge bag. But she's like, she took a bite of a chip and she goes, oh, there goes my diet. It's over. And I kind of remember, I remember what I was thinking in that moment. Like, because I knew nothing about dieting. I don't know what that was. And I'm like, what?
00:23:33
Speaker
Really? One, one chip? How does that work? Like, whoa. Like, that must be serious. You know what I mean? Like, I just imprinted on my brain for some reason that, like, wow, it's that easy to ruin your diet.
00:23:48
Speaker
I can, I'm putting myself there. I can feel it the way you're describing it. Yeah. Cool. Isn't that odd? Like, like what you were saying a little earlier with people like, Oh, you did this one thing and then it's all over. Like it's this dramatic thing, which doesn't really have to be like it's an obstacle. It's a little thing that you have to step over. You don't have to climb over it, you know? But you can feel that way though. Cause that's like, yeah, that's true.
00:24:13
Speaker
I think a lot, some of women, you know, and this has happened with me when you've dieted for a long time or you have experience with like extreme diets and dealing with lots of hunger and over-training, like your nervous system is so like pushed to its limit repeatedly that it becomes chronic. It's in like a chronic state of stress. Some people can go through trauma. And so it's not just unlearning a lot of what you've learned before. It's literally
00:24:43
Speaker
training your nervous system to feel safe in a situation in which it used to not feel safe, which was a diet and you're trying to diet again. It can be scary and terrifying, especially when there's like hunger and cravings involved. But that's like when you have someone there that's not going to judge you through it at all. And you means you can learn to feel safe with someone else. You can learn to feel safe with yourself.
00:25:11
Speaker
Um, it's a whole process. Um, something we take very seriously, but yeah. So what's, um, for somebody who's listening that doesn't have a coach, what are like some questions you ask your clients to work them through a situation? Like what are things that somebody listening can ask themselves if they have the ability to kind of step back from judgment and look at a situation and ask themselves questions as to why this
00:25:41
Speaker
Sabotage situation keeps happening and what what would you say that they could like? How can they help themselves basically? So I actually have conversations like these all the time with people who I don't work with like oh, yeah like yeah, we had family visiting this week and then I just like anytime someone that I meet or even a stranger wants to talk about nutrition I could go off I've missed exits talking about I
00:26:06
Speaker
this stuff but um perfect example like uh last conversation i had with someone was they're like i just i you know i don't understand why i'm not losing weight you know i eat this and this and i eat this at breakfast i eat this at lunch and they'll give me even like the measurements and how much it was and i'll say okay and i'll kind of calculate in my head like so it's like
00:26:27
Speaker
1500 calories like that's not bad you eat that something like that nearly every day and I'm like they say yes I'm like okay then I'll tell them well if you're not losing weight and you know I can just tell by looking at their like height and weight and you know just kind of guesstimating them like if you are not losing weight or if you're gaining weight at least that but you're eating maybe I'd say a range around 1500 calories a day of course I'm like then what I've seen is usually there are some days in your week where
00:26:57
Speaker
you eat a lot. And that's usually where their eyes will open. They'll look at me and be like, yep, yep. I'm like, how did you know? And one Saturday night where you went hard. And so and then that's where we start looking at patterns. I'll say, okay, well, what days do you notice that is and they'll say, Oh, well, definitely a weekend day, but it kind of starts Thursdays. I'm like, okay, so make sense. There's the end of the week, you're feeling tired fatigue from the week, like you're
00:27:21
Speaker
probably hungry. You just want to let loose. Yeah. Yeah. And like, so if you notice that pattern towards the end of the week, starting between Thursday and Sunday, there are two days in there that are hard for you. That's what you work with. The other days, like, um, sounds like you're eating enough. Make sure you're sleeping and drinking enough water. But if there are two days that are kind of struck their struggle for you right now, then you ask yourself,
00:27:45
Speaker
What are you eating? Are you eating enough? Is your diet changing so much that it messes with your head? So for instance, if you're eating four or five meals a day regularly, and then one day you go down to eating two meals, that can change your digestion enough, maybe blow you. And it's not bad, but what that does is if you gain weight the next day, even if you're within your calories and you gain some weight on the weight scale, doesn't mean it's fat.
00:28:10
Speaker
usually, especially women, have a bad tendency of looking at that, making that mean something negative and about themselves, and then that'll throw them over the edge. Even though it's just bloat because your digestion is trying to adjust to eating two meals instead of four or five. Give yourself a little grace. Yeah. So that's what I would say. Start looking at the patterns. If there's two days, start working with those two days. Notice if you're
00:28:38
Speaker
where your food is at, if you're not drinking enough water, if you're going down on sleep, or if it's maybe on the emotional side, do you notice yourself thinking about someone who passed away who you really miss and you tend to go for foods to help yourself feel better? It could be maybe an emotional thing. If it's both, then you have that data, right? You have that information you can work with.
00:29:03
Speaker
Yeah. So that's what I would say. And then of course, speak with someone, you know, just either start getting information on how to work through if it's a little deeper, like maybe an eating disorder or not. But if it's a little deeper than just the one day where I eff up. Yeah. Yeah. That reminds me, somebody gets stories today. When I was doing massage for so long, there were a couple of clients that I would help find patterns like that, but not in like
00:29:33
Speaker
food or, you know, health or fitness, but they would come in and be like, Oh, this, this kink in my neck. That's one lady I remember specifically. She's like, Oh, this came in my neck. Like, I just can't get it happens like one time a year, but I just got to get worked out. I'm like, Oh, so what did it happen this time last year too? She goes, Yeah, I'm like, same year before that. She goes, Yeah. I'm like, so what happened in September? However, many years ago, she goes, Oh, my husband died.
00:30:00
Speaker
And she's like, I never put that together. Like every September, I think it was September. It wasn't her husband, but something majorly tragic like that had happened. And she's like, I can't believe I didn't put that together. Every year at this month, her body would just be like, from the trauma.
00:30:20
Speaker
patterns are a real thing y'all the relief she must have felt when you like and when she placed it together thanks to your questions. Yeah, those are funny to me. It was just like so simple. I'm like, well, there's the clear answer. But it was just so funny that any of we bought had those moments where I can't play we didn't think about or put the little pieces together. Oh, I've worked with
00:30:40
Speaker
Yeah, I love patterns, I swear. Because people are really good with data. Once they can see what's in front of them, they're compelled enough to figure out a new course of action. But it's putting that data out there in front of them in a non-pathologizing, non-judgmental way that they feel like they're like, okay, I can do something with this. I had one woman I was working with, she actually was still working together.
00:31:10
Speaker
Um, she had already been to therapy. She was really good at using the tools that she'd learned through her therapist. And she just wanted to be more active and more fit, lose some body fat. She didn't have any eating disorder background or anything, or an even disordered eating. Like she just didn't know. She's like, I just need more information. So I know what to do. And so
00:31:34
Speaker
That's exactly what we did. She started dropping some weight, but then she started kind of maintaining her weight for a couple of weeks. And it wasn't even around her period, which that was a pattern we picked up on that when she's on her, once the time of the month for her, she will feel emotionally low. So it's not that she would go for food to feel better. She would just not do anything. So she wouldn't work out, but she was able to work through that. And so she told me about one check and she's like, so I'm not on my period. My energy is great, but I'm still feeling so
00:32:04
Speaker
low and I don't understand and um and so it was kind of like so she wouldn't necessarily go for protein like she would like she would just you know she'd stay with her in her calories but she'd just munch on something that you know she originally wanted to eat what she planned but she just was feeling so low that she wouldn't right and so I asked her I was like you know
00:32:27
Speaker
let's look at the data, right? You've got everything covered, you're doing everything, but you're still feeling that way. It could be that it's more on the emotional side, like maybe you're feeling low, like maybe, because then I would ask her questions. She told me, okay, well, my mother-in-law is sick, my husband's gotten sick, my daughters are getting sick, or my daughter's struggling with anxiety. And I told her, it sounds like
00:32:50
Speaker
Those like whenever we have big stresses in our life and family and health is a big one. And maybe you feel like you can't help them the way you would like. Maybe you're putting a lot on your shoulders in terms of what you feel like you want to do and can do. And when I told her that and pointed her out, pointed out to her, that was like, it's not just like,
00:33:14
Speaker
there's other things in your life that are impacting your health and fitness that are worth taking a look at. And she didn't think to put too into like to look at other areas of her life. And so once she did, she's like, that is exactly why I'm feeling that way. Like, you know, she said, my mother in law, my husband, my daughter,
00:33:31
Speaker
You know, they're just, you know, she wanted to take their, she wanted them to be healthy and felt bad that she couldn't help them feel better. But once she realized that that's what it was, she's like, okay, I just need to not put that on my shoulders. I feel so much lighter now because I understand. But you know, it's, it's, it's making, it's taking a look at the external forces. Yeah. And like seeing how, you know, sometimes you try to control things that we really can't. Yeah.
00:33:59
Speaker
Um, so that puts like a burden on our shoulders and you can kind of feel it and it'll show in one way or another in your results if you're getting them or not. Absolutely. It took me a long time, uh, when I was the such therapist to really admit that stress can affect us physically. Uh, and I just kind of came to that realization and I could just, I got to the point where I could, if I'm working on somebody,
00:34:25
Speaker
I could kind of tell if they were a control freak or not. Yeah. Because they just wouldn't let go. Like they just couldn't like they would physically be tense in a massage. I'm like, I'm about to suck shit out of you. Stop it. But it was it was really weird. I could just kind of tell a kind of person they were just based on
00:34:46
Speaker
how they accepted my work. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. That's kind of what I miss about that, but I'm not going to go back to that. My boyfriend though, one of his favorite sayings is control what you can control. I'm like, stop.
00:35:00
Speaker
I know, but it's true. Understand what you can control and what you can't. He's a very easy-going person because of that philosophy, but it's true. Yeah, and it's hard to understand that when you have an emotion that you're so tied to.

Impact of Processed Foods

00:35:25
Speaker
For instance, for me, when I was been genieing, I was very tied to
00:35:30
Speaker
I think it was like embarrassment or like worthiness. I feel like I was letting others down, but it sounds so weird. I liked feeling that way because I'd felt it so often. I didn't know how to feel without it.
00:35:48
Speaker
Oh, you know what I mean? So it's like, I don't want to let go of something that felt so familiar because it felt unsafe. So I was like, well, if I let go of this, even though I know it's bad for me, because it takes me to food, I'm just going to disappear or something's going to, I mean, you know, I'm a type three. I disappeared. So the nothingness of it.
00:36:10
Speaker
But it really feels that way. So that's why I talk about like titration. It's, you know, you talk with someone you, you know, talk with, it's got to be someone you trust, but you open up, you
00:36:22
Speaker
Keep one foot in safety, one foot, I say risk, but it's one foot that extends past your comfort zone. But knowing that the other foot is safe, you can always come back and that you're not alone. And that's a phase that has to happen. People think that that phase is too slow. It's going to slow their progress. But I'm telling you, if that phase isn't done, you're not going to move forward.
00:36:46
Speaker
You're not going to be free the way you want to. I've kind of noticed that in myself right now, where I am keeping my foot in two different places. I don't know quite how to define it, but with my last check in with Lindsay, she's like, we've gotten to the point where I'm now in a comfort zone, which is great. I've made progress and then now it's a new comfort zone. And she's like, you know, we can
00:37:08
Speaker
you know stay here if you want or we could you know push ourselves you know based on your original goals i'm like yeah yeah yeah and i love challenging myself but there are certain areas you know and the weekends i do sabotage over the weekends because i'm super social so is mark um and then those are triggers to like drink a little more than i should or something like that
00:37:30
Speaker
So I totally get it where I'm just like one foot here. I just feel my other foot slowly inching past that door frame to the other side to get more results and things like that. Because there's times where I would stick to my guests where I really don't feel like drinking. So I'll just get like a club soda with a lime or something. And then when I stick to that all night long, I'm having a great time.
00:37:54
Speaker
And I'm like, Oh, it's just so powerless. Oh, why don't you do this? And then I'm really hard on myself. You know what I mean? Like, but it's like, no, it's okay. It's okay. It's okay. We're getting you see yourself kind of moving. Yeah.
00:38:09
Speaker
It'll get there. Just have fun. Okay. It will get there. And that's really smart to Lindsay to say, Hey, look at where you're at now. And like you recognize you like I'm in this new comfort zone. I'm a whole new person. Yeah, that's such an important recognition because you know, the process works, right? Yeah. So it makes you more willing to try something different or something new. Yeah. Doesn't matter the pace, but you're just willing. That's all you need that willingness. It's interesting, because she was probably a little off topic. But when I first started with Zoe,
00:38:38
Speaker
when we first really started to hone in on macros, we just started with protein, right? And then overall calories. Then we switched to let's, let's focus on protein, carbs and fat altogether. But so I did that up until this past week, where she's like, let's just focus on protein and overall calories. I was like, Oh, I think I'm going backwards.
00:38:57
Speaker
Huh, maybe she knows something I don't. But I like that, you know, because I honestly I would it would be rare when I would actually hit all three of them within a close like what three to five grams. Like there are days where like, oh, that was perfect. And then, you know, I'm not trying to get on stage, you know, so I think that's probably why like, let's just she lowered my calories just a little bit and up to my protein. It's like, okay, I can do that. That's easy.
00:39:25
Speaker
Yeah, anyway, this isn't or anyway. OK, so number three, what do we got? So this was one that I'm still getting more familiar with, but I'm fascinated by it is if you feel like you are like you're sabotaging, you know, sabotaging yourself in a way, then and it's not like because you it's not because you don't have the education or maybe there's an emotion. It could be because of what you're eating.
00:39:54
Speaker
And I had a hard time understanding this because I was so convinced years ago that it was your mindset and the emotional part. I'm like, no, you have to learn to control those. Food has no control over you at all. There's no way that... But it does. But it really does. Well, it's food and the processes in your digestive system. The biology part. Yeah, there is a biological
00:40:25
Speaker
physiological, there's just processes that happen regardless of how committed or how disciplined you are. If you aren't, and this is what I mean, if you are eating more, I'd say ultra processed foods than wholesome foods, you are getting in your own way because you are not allowing certain processes
00:40:51
Speaker
in your digestive system to happen. So here's an example. When we eat like some ultra processed foods, let's take Doritos, for example. Yeah, I was going to say, what's something that people wouldn't normally, I mean, people know chips are processed, but it's not some that it's not McDonald's, you know? Yeah, it's like ultra processed. It's like the difference between like ultra processed and like wholesome, for instance. And there's, you know, there's wholesome process, really processed and ultra processed. There's like a range. True.
00:41:20
Speaker
The difference is what creates an ultra-processed food, that equipment and those ingredients, you are not going to find in your kitchen. And I'm not going to find in mine. Like those emulsifiers or those ingredients that you can't even pronounce. Like you don't have a bottle of that in your kitchen. No. Because it's so true. You don't think about that. Yeah.
00:41:43
Speaker
The thing is some of the substances that go into ultra processed foods, let's take an emulsifier, for instance, like that provides shelf life and food. Oh, okay. So when that goes into your body, you are starting to digest that break it down. You'll say you're hungry. You stop being hungry when your stomach starts expanding.
00:42:06
Speaker
And when your stomach starts expanding, cause there's food and liquid coming in, there are signals that are coming, that are sent from the mucus, uh, inside the lining of your digestive system. Is that what they call it? Not grill. And I'm not even talking about that hormone yet. There are, there are like, I just wanted to sound smart. I'm sorry. You're kidding. You're like, you're, you're one step ahead. Okay. Um, and I'm not like, I'm not fully like, I haven't done all my research on this yet. So I will say that by, this is like the basics.
00:42:36
Speaker
Um, with these emulsifiers friends. Well, anyway, you're, you're, um, sorry. No, no, no. I mean, it's not like I want to explain this. Well, when that's when your stomach is expanding, there are signals that go from that mucus inside your lining of your, uh, digestive system to.
00:42:55
Speaker
molecules inside your gut that then send information up to your brain to say, Hey, we have food coming in. You can stop releasing ghrelin. Okay. She's not hungry anymore. We have food coming in. You don't need to go search for food anymore. Right. So then hunger should start coming down. But when emulsifiers, for instance, are in your body and you start digesting that they block that signal from the lining being, they block that signal from being sent. So you're eating, but you don't feel like you're getting full. Right.
00:43:24
Speaker
So the kinds of foods you eat really matter because if you eat more wholesome foods and you have like a healthy gut microbiome, the probiotics, all those little gut bugs, when you have enough of those and they enable processes like the one I just talked about, they enable processes like that to happen in your gut that then sends signals to your brain, you can actually
00:43:54
Speaker
it is possible to eat without a lot of hunger and you can even decrease your cravings.

Cravings & Nutritional Needs

00:43:58
Speaker
And there's so many more processes. I just talked about one, but it's so much easier to lose weight, maintain your weight, even gain weight without being distracted or struggling with hunger and cravings just by the food you eat. So that is a piece that a lot of people are missing. Like that's where like macro counting I think is,
00:44:20
Speaker
can be a little slippery where you try to fit in whatever foods you want, but if they're ultra processed, they're not gonna serve you the way that wholesome foods could. What's one example of a food that a quote unquote healthy person would have in their fridge or pantry that they would probably consider healthy, but it actually isn't. Oh. Probably like some sort of snack food.
00:44:49
Speaker
Yeah, definitely something that you know didn't come from the earth or had a mother I would say We're gonna get crucified for that I'm gonna I like eating meat but I didn't try to buy local and regenerative our group agriculture is what I focus on but
00:45:11
Speaker
Yeah, I would say anything snackable like you have to look at the ingredients to like chocolate's not bad. For instance, it's not ultra processed the way that you know, I would say Doritos are not anything against Doritos. But if you struggle with problems, right? If you're downing the whole bag.
00:45:29
Speaker
You're like, well, I'm still hungry. Then my time to reevaluate. Yeah. And so it doesn't mean you can't have Doritos. It just means you want to, you know, if you're struggling, you may want to cut back on them a little bit and, you know, change your diet in a way that supports a healthy gut microbiome and then go from there. But, um, yeah, in their fridge, I'm not, I'm not sure. Cause those aren't perishable. Like they're going to perish if they're out of the fridge, but I'd say pantry.
00:45:55
Speaker
Pantry anything goes yeah, I think that you would buy in the inner aisles mostly in a grocery store Yeah, I've noticed over the years that just how little I go into the middle aisles. Oh good Like it's always kind of especially when I did whole three the first time You and that's one of the tricks they tell you is to stick to the outskirts of the grocery store But I still go in there for like I'll get like the bread or my oatmeal or something like that But it's like rare
00:46:25
Speaker
not rare, but Mark, he'll go he'll go into every aisle. He has to do every aisle like this. Let's go. We don't need anything here. And then I'll be like, Oh, wait, I need that. I told you. Anyway, but yeah, so that's a good example of like how you might be sabotaging without even knowing it. Yeah. And it has to do with like,
00:46:47
Speaker
Dopamine and pain in your brain as well. I mean if you we could get into like, you know, how sciencey stuff well, I mean that but also You know the big that was it the ten big companies that own so much of the processed foods and other things in our lives like they they spent millions of dollars on
00:47:05
Speaker
with engineers and scientists to find the right ratio of salt and fat and sugar to make a product that will strike that dopamine and make you instantly feel like, you know, like not addicted or obsessed with it, but it's like, Oh, that is so good. I have to have more. And so, um,
00:47:23
Speaker
You just like when you start eating more wholesome foods, you will decrease your hunger and cravings because you're more full because you're eating more fiber. You're not eating as much sugar. So you're not getting those huge rises in dopamine. You're getting more just subtle hits of dopamine, which can still be pleasurable. So you start finding joy in the sweetness of an apple versus a donut, for instance, or so many donuts. Yeah. So that's how you can help yourself with just by changing what you eat.
00:47:52
Speaker
And I think water too. I noticed that when I first finally started drinking enough water, how little I was actually craving.
00:48:00
Speaker
Like I just, it just kind of happened. I didn't force myself to not eat something when I craved it. Just all of a sudden I, like, I think I've said this before. I, when I first was going through that process many years ago, I, I'd never given up cereal in my life. I love it. Like it was exactly what you're talking about. Like I loved it so much. It was tasty. I could have like
00:48:22
Speaker
two and a half bowls of cereal, big bowls. And when I finally started drinking enough water, I just realized how, when was the last time I had some cereal? Oh, that's interesting. Oh, like I started to like put the pieces together because water, that's, it's, this is something we could touch on too with understanding what your cravings actually mean, what you're, what you're lacking nutritionally, right?
00:48:49
Speaker
it could be yeah um maybe you're lacking um it could be maybe it could be thirsty yeah it could be if it's a craving that could be i don't know necessarily there's i'd say there's like hunger there's cravings there's appetite there's cravings are usually i would say are
00:49:08
Speaker
It's not hunger if you could eat a piece of broccoli and feel fine, but if, like raw broccoli, but if you don't want that raw broccoli, it's probably a craving. Like you're just bored or lonely or, you know, you're just not looking forward to something or you want to get through work with something by eating something, you know,

Diet Trends & Balanced Nutrition

00:49:25
Speaker
you're not hungry. That's going to be a craving. And there's nothing wrong with eating in response to a craving. It's just when it gets overboard or gets to the point that you beat yourself up about it, that you want to look into it.
00:49:37
Speaker
That's a good way to like kind of self evaluate on judgmentally and just being self aware. It's a long process. But as far as the self, not knowing yourself sabotaging with what you're eating, that can happen with certain like diet lifestyles, right? Oh, yeah. Like, we were just talking about if you're vegan, which
00:50:02
Speaker
we're not cropping on vegan. But understand that you are going to miss out what was it you're gonna miss out on some certain nutritional values that you can get from meat. So understand that. And then supplement it properly. Yeah, I think like with the anyone who's vegan, I think zinc, something that we can get through animal protein pretty easily is something you're gonna have to either
00:50:26
Speaker
you're going to have to get through other sources of food. And I think that's through, I'll have to double check, but it kind of, you have to make sure you get those nutrients in, in your diet, instead of, first and foremost, instead, I would say taking a pill or supplementing, but yeah, you want to
00:50:47
Speaker
fad diets are, you know, you just want to make sure you're getting all the nutrients in that it goes back to the education, like understand what you might be missing. So on the flip side, the new fad diet that's out the carnivore. Yeah, which sounds
00:51:02
Speaker
Have you done any research on that? I should have, I guess that would have been something to do before we started talking. Jeez, Caitlin. No, I like I didn't do I just from just because I know when you cut out one or two macronutrients and you're relying more on one. So in this case, mostly on protein and you're cutting back on carbohydrates and
00:51:29
Speaker
Fats, it's hard to cut back on that when you're eating a lot of red meat, but the kind of fat you're getting is a lot of saturated fat, which a lot of people will increase their LDL cholesterol, which is not good and not healthy when they're on the carnivore diet. So I just know that when you cut back on certain macronutrients, which are energy, you are also inevitably cutting back on some micronutrients that you can only get through those macros.
00:51:55
Speaker
So that's where the carnivore diets and any other diet like, you know, keto is another one. You have to be smart and, you know, make sure that you are getting those nutrients some way. Otherwise, you will be losing weight, but it'll be you will probably be malnourished.
00:52:14
Speaker
Yeah, I wanted to, I should have, what I was saying was with the carnivore diet, like why is it such a fad diet? Like what, somebody found some good result from it all of a sudden. And that's probably how it became popular. You know, like I lost a hundred pounds only eating meat. Like, okay, let's calm down. You know what I mean? I think it happened, that history has to be something like that is what I'm saying. Yeah, I don't, I should find the origin of- My brothers are trying to do that.
00:52:42
Speaker
I love them. My family's healthy. They really are, but they are a fad diet or something cool and new and modern diet. That's the thing. Specifically talking about my twin brother. There's a few others. My mom kind of will too. My older brother will, but my twin brother, he's the crossfitter.
00:53:08
Speaker
Paleo for a minute. I remember him trying to order at Gosh cheesecake back. He's talking to the waiter. He's a chewy this paleo Fuck that is Just eat before you get here we were celebrating anyway, so he was they made this chili, which is actually really good We came over to play games and it was just
00:53:36
Speaker
It was this bowl of meat, water, and you could just see the oils floating around. I don't even know if there were beans in there, but there was corn. It tasted really good. I'm like, there's 80 grams of protein right in front of me. And my sister-in-law was, my other sister-in-law, she was contemplating on doing it. And I'm just sitting there at this dinner. She's talking about it. I'm like, oh, I just don't want it.
00:54:03
Speaker
I don't know anything about I'll keep my if I don't have all the facts, I just keep my mouth shut, which is generally the majority of the time. But then later on, she was like, No, you know, I don't think I'm gonna do it just because it just doesn't seem like it's realistic for my life and sustaining it. I'm like, like the sense of relief like that. Thank you. Yeah, I think let's say carnivore that I should say I need to
00:54:27
Speaker
Like make sure with what I had said earlier about saturated fat and increased LDL cholesterol, like we do need saturated fat in our bodies, right? Say if you stick to close to 10% of your fat from saturated fat, you'll be fine because you do need some saturated fat. It's just that the carnivore diet I think provides so much.
00:54:46
Speaker
of it that it's like, it can be bad. But the carnivore that like you do lose weight really quickly on it because protein has such a high thermic effect compared to carbohydrates and fat. So for instance, I tell people like if you were to eat 100 calories of chicken, you're actually only going to absorb about 75 of those calories because 25% of it was just
00:55:09
Speaker
metabolize, like it took that much energy to digest the chicken. Same thing with fiber. Interesting. Let me think about that. Yeah. So carbohydrates, their thermic effect is say is between around maybe 90% 1992. So if you get 100 calories of carbohydrates, you'd absorb about 90 of those calories. And fat has the lowest thermic effect. If you get 100 calories of fat, you'll absorb about 99. So that's why low carb is super popular. Yeah.
00:55:37
Speaker
one reason. Yeah, but also you're removing a bunch of calories overall.

Sustainability of Dietary Changes

00:55:41
Speaker
Yeah. But um, yeah, but if you're eating nothing but protein, you could eat 100. I don't know, 100. You're only absorbing 75% of what you're actually eating.
00:55:51
Speaker
I'm like processing that in my brain like I just I don't think I obviously did not know that. That's so cool. Yeah, so you do you do lose you know, and if you're, you know, working out likely you're, you know, building muscle and because you're eating a lot of protein. Oh, you said a curse word. Oh, man. I haven't done that yet. Sailor and me came out suddenly. Nicole is wide.
00:56:21
Speaker
But yeah, so you do lose weight pretty quickly, but it's not, I do not endorse it.
00:56:28
Speaker
Yeah. Cause anything fast, like it'll, you'll just find yourself back where you were probably because that's not sustainable. Like you want to eat that much meat. Like that just sounds exhausting for my body to do all that. It's just like constantly drinking. Like I feel sorry for my liver. I was just like constantly drinking. Same thing with that. So we're not endorsing any quick fixes ever. Um, yeah, that's it.
00:56:58
Speaker
Yeah. And that's that. So, but yeah, what you eat, like in a nutshell, it really matters. So I would say that's why we were big proponents of the 80-20 principle as well. Like make sure 80% of your foods or around 80% are at least, you know, wholesome foods. Um, you know, like I said before it came from the earth or had a mother not ultra processed the other 20% you'll be fine. Like eat, eat the donuts, eat the Doritos, Oreos, whatever you want, but make sure that the majority of your food is coming from, um,
00:57:28
Speaker
you know, wholesome sources. Yeah. And I think that's what, when I did Whole30, that really clicked it in for me because I just got used to that habit of eating more wholesome foods. Doing Whole30 forever is impossible. So that's what we're saying is like, make it you.
00:57:50
Speaker
And I think, I don't know why he talked about Whole30, but I think that is like a kind of a cool place for people to start to kind of get used to that and like educating themselves on what Whole Foods is and how to shop for that and the ingredients and how you feel when you start. That's why it's such a popular fad, you know, air quotes, fad diet, but it's not sustainable long term. Some people are doing it good for them, I think, but they're probably lying.
00:58:18
Speaker
I don't know. No, but I wonder I say I say that too. Actually, I'm like, makes you wonder. Yeah. But yeah, so that's why I loved it, because it really clicked in my brain. And now that's all I do. And that's all I eat. And I'll have I'll cook these incredible dinners. And they're so good. Yeah. And they're, I mean, I guess the most processed they would be like a pasta. But that's not like
00:58:42
Speaker
that process, does it? No, it's like, all right. No, no, no. And everyone like you need to be around Caitlin when she cooks and meals are insane. I haven't cooked for you. You have you made bruschetta once. When we were last here at the Nashville Fit Show afterwards, we were at Casey's house. Oh, yeah. Oh, that bruschetta was so good. Okay, I have. But one of my signature pieces.
00:59:08
Speaker
I'm not a chef. I just fell in love with it because of Whole30 because you had to cook. That was tough some nights because I just wanted to eat my frozen pizza.

Episode Conclusion

00:59:21
Speaker
No, that's good. Anything that can teach you to eat more wholesome foods, I think is a good thing to at least try. Well, I'll cook for you again sometime soon.
00:59:33
Speaker
Y'all heard that. Mark my words. I just lost the other night we made these beef enchiladas that were really good. Doesn't that sound great? Yeah. Anyway, all right. Well, I think that is what all we have for everybody today. So stay tuned for next week and our next awesome topic. Anyway, we'll have a good one and we will talk to you guys later. Bye.
01:00:05
Speaker
Thanks for listening to the FFP Alignment Podcast. Please support us by downloading, rating, and recommending us to your friends and family. Be sure to check us out on Instagram at TheFitFemProject. That's F-I-T-F-E-M-M-E Project. And for those of you looking to find their central balance of lifestyle and fitness, book a free consult by going to TheFitFemProject.com.
01:00:28
Speaker
That's F-I-T-F-E-M-M-E, project.com and click apply now. Until next time, this is the Fitment Project alignment podcast.