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Minisode - Letting Go
39 Plays1 year ago
In this very first minisode KateLynn sits us down to talk about letting go of the things that don't deserve our time and energy.
Instagram: @thefitfemmeproject
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/fitfemmeprojectfitnesscoaching/
Website: www.fitfemmeproject.com
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Transcript
Introduction to FitFem Project
00:00:02
Speaker
Welcome to the FitFem project alignment podcast. It is here that we cultivate and gather all who have been through it in fitness, relationships, careers, lifestyle changes, and unforgettable crucial life pivots trying to achieve their most sovereign selves.
Stories of Resilience and Growth
00:00:19
Speaker
We're here to provide you with thought-provoking detailed stories and information from truly fascinating men and women from all walks of life, professions, generations, and modern day sagas who speak to the rawest, darkest moments that made them the strong, decisive, humble, helpful, healing people that they are today. We ask them to hold nothing back because life is a multidimensional pursuit to be stronger, healthier, and more aligned mentally, emotionally, and physically. Let's go!
Introducing Minisodes
00:00:57
Speaker
Hey FFP Ladies, so it's ya girl Caitlin. You may have noticed that this is not our regularly scheduled programming. That's because this is the start of our minisodes. They will come out each week in the middle of the week, and these are smaller style episodes that are just meant to give you a boost of encouragement, love, motivation, and
00:01:19
Speaker
Hopefully more laughs, right? We need all of them more in our lives, right? I've been wanting to do this for a while because I know with the podcasts that I listen to and are very loyal to, I wish they had a podcast episode to listen to every single day. So I want to be able to offer you guys the same thing, well, not every day.
Letting Go of Control
00:01:43
Speaker
But just something more to listen to while you're on that treadmill or cleaning something or driving who knows But that is what I want to offer you guys and today I was feeling kind of inspired Well, you know what first of all, this is really weird talking to myself
00:02:03
Speaker
But I was feeling like really inspired today to kind of talk about letting go. It sounds super cliche, but it was a frustrating, I'm recording on Monday and you know, today was definitely like a Monday, if you kind of understand what I mean by that. Just some frustrating things with my nine to five job that I have and
00:02:31
Speaker
Just things just not going my way and no one likes that, right? But I'm sitting at the gym just being frustrated and just wanting to, I'll be honest, punch something. But I didn't, trust me. I only daydream about punching things and I never actually do it. I did, I used to do boxer size, if you would call it that. What was it?
00:03:01
Speaker
Title, no, title boxing, that's what it was a while ago. And that was pretty fun. But anyway, I was thinking about all of the things that have not gone perfectly today and how I can solve my problems, how I can get this to work out and this to stop happening, you know, things like that.
00:03:24
Speaker
Really a lot of it is pretty much out of my control. I'm just doing the best that I can, you know, do the best work that I can do and just kind of take it at that and have pride in the work that I do and knowing that I did or do everything that I can to have success. And my boyfriend says all the time,
00:03:46
Speaker
You know control what you can control and I hate it when he says that because it's again cliche But the fucker is right, you know, it's so true Control what you can control and you know that that mindset just can give you a lot of peace although that's not something I would literally tell myself like word for word and
00:04:08
Speaker
in the past, but letting go is something just a lesson I'm continuously learning throughout my life because my initial reaction to things is to be on the defense, right?
Overcoming Fear of the Unknown
00:04:23
Speaker
I think a lot of people are like that, so if I'm in an argument or something happens that I don't like, I'm immediately defensive rather than just taking a step back, thinking about it, thinking about
00:04:36
Speaker
you know the other side the other opinions you know things like that and it's taken a lot a lot of practice to be able to do that more naturally and easily um but i'm in this process of continuously having to let go and i just was at the gym like i said thinking about all this
00:04:59
Speaker
things that I don't like right now and having that conversation with myself again for who knows how many times so far this year um but it just takes off this pressure right this this need to have everything go my way that the need to have control of over absolutely everything
00:05:22
Speaker
and stressing over things that I just can't control. It's just the way that life is and telling myself, let it go. Let it go, bro, because it's gonna work out. It always works out. It may not work out the exact way that you would plan it or want it, but it always works out. And I remember,
00:05:48
Speaker
long long time ago many moons ago when i was about to go through a divorce and this is the first time i really clung on to this concept this i guess life lesson at least for me anyway that i was going to i was about to go through my divorce and i was with a friend who um she wasn't in a great marriage either and she was kind of on her way out so we kind of banded together as like a little support
00:06:12
Speaker
And I was—I can't remember the conversation exactly or exactly what I had said, but I always remember her response. And what we were talking about was just my fear of, you know, obviously the unknown. I was still a child. I was 23 at the time.
00:06:33
Speaker
And I had never lived outside of my parents' house. I got married and moved out of my parents' house, like that was. I had never lived on my own. I've never truly supported myself on my own. I obviously have worked, but it is scary having to be out in that big world and support yourself not knowing what's gonna happen and the big unknown, but oh, hold on. Okay, sorry, where was I? The old ball and chain had to call me right now.
00:07:02
Speaker
but um oh yeah what was i saying okay yeah so i was in this conversation with my friend you know talking about how i was fearing the unknown all that jazz and she just turns to me and we're like shopping i think we really get clairs or books a million it's super random and she turns to me and goes you know
00:07:22
Speaker
regardless of how scary it is, you know, things just always work out. It will always work out. Being on your own is scary, but it'll work out. And does that advice and that reassurance
00:07:38
Speaker
It was so simple and it stuck with me obviously since then and because it's so true, right? It will always work
Continuous Journey of Letting Go
00:07:46
Speaker
out. And since that moment, I've been in worse times than my divorce. I've been in financial binds where I didn't know where I was gonna sleep or you got to scrape together some money for Chipotle or some groceries, things like that.
00:08:05
Speaker
And that was the advice that would always kind of carry me through is that it will always work out. You know, think about that for yourself. And if you're in a moment or a situation where you don't know what will happen and you want to, you know, grip it, grip the situation as tightly as possible to feel, you know, have that sense of control.
00:08:31
Speaker
But in reality, you really don't. It's like easier said than done, right? But think about that for yourself and how you can just reassure yourself with the fact that, you know what, it honestly, it will work out. You know, literally, what's what is the worst that can happen?
00:08:52
Speaker
The bad things can happen, unfortunate things can happen, but you are strong enough to get through it. You are wise enough and you are graceful enough to get through anything that you might be facing. And this just goes back to my original point of just kind of letting go because
00:09:11
Speaker
with that lesson that I learned so long ago and still have to remember to, you know, have, it requires that letting go.
Enneagram and Stress Reduction
00:09:23
Speaker
The Enneagram talks about this, especially for type eight, but I believe everybody really experiences this where you are holding something, you know, metaphorically, obviously.
00:09:34
Speaker
holding something just too tightly where it ends up working out for the worse because of that. Obviously it's situational. For the type 8 usually one of the advice that they give you in the book like it's written down on paper where they say just notice how tightly you grip your pen or the broom with or with whatever you're doing and relax.
00:10:04
Speaker
like literally relax and but it was so true when I read that I was like oh my god I really am just so unnecessary and this obviously applied to just emotional or mental things where I was just gripping things just too tightly and it was not serving me all it was giving me was anxiety and stress
00:10:25
Speaker
nobody wants that in their life right so over the years i've definitely have honed in that skill of letting go and i am a very i love who i am today because i'm a very easy going person
00:10:40
Speaker
I can stress out about something but then so quickly let it go.
Life Choices and Prioritization
00:10:46
Speaker
Sometimes other things last longer than others but you know it was just like today was the example I started with was the whole morning I was just so frustrated and by the time I got to the gym that was just really when I had that like come to Jesus moment with myself of like hey
00:11:04
Speaker
it's you've had worse work situations happen before it'll work out look at these other positive things that are happening that can support you and your mission for work and all that stuff um so that's just like my
00:11:20
Speaker
Encouragement for you guys today is just look at some things in your life that you might be holding on to a little too tightly unnecessarily and Is that something you can kind of loosen your grip on a little bit? Like what is it worth to you in? Five hours. What is it worth to you in five years? You know you hear that advice a lot like is this gonna matter at the end of your life and I've said that
00:11:48
Speaker
to my past um boyfriends before like there was guys who i don't know why i've dated people who just are weirdo clean freaks like weird like bro like it's gonna get clean like just lay off
00:12:04
Speaker
But I always use the dishwasher as an example. Like the dishes are gonna get clean, man. What does it matter? Like, okay, don't put this here because the dishwasher is gonna melt this plastic. All right, cool. I'll put it somewhere else. Like give me a legitimate reason other than that you're just a control freak. So it's like, if I could just beat into people's brains of like, it doesn't matter for the majority of things that happen in our life,
00:12:33
Speaker
then the world would be such better place. At least that's just my opinion. But that is just kind of the lens in which I am viewing my life and the way I go about my life and seeing what circumstances warrant a response. Man, that's not really a great way to put it. Which circumstances really deserve that kind of energy? That's a better way to put it.
00:13:04
Speaker
Does it really matter how the dishwasher's loaded? I'm sorry for those of you, I don't feel attacked. It's just an example. But does it really matter? The dishes are gonna get clean. And if you're gonna stress over the dishes getting organized in a certain way, dude, you gotta let it go.
00:13:29
Speaker
I can't believe I'm talking about this. But it's just an overall example of how we can start to train our minds and our hearts to let go a little bit more and be able to have that stress free. And in having that conversation with ourself, really, it's literally what it is. It's just this conversation with yourself of like, why does this matter to me to this degree?
00:13:55
Speaker
and then kind of deducing and peeling back those layers of oh it might be because of this let's give a cliche example why not of this childhood trauma of um not doing something perfectly now i gotta have everything perfectly because i was you know my mom beat me or something um and that's just one reason why you might be the way that you are but it's just a matter like overall
00:14:26
Speaker
I'm probably giving the worst examples, so I'm sorry. It's weird talking to myself. I do it in the shower plenty. Like, why is it different with me recording myself? Anyway, overall, it's about self-reflection, self-awareness, why we do what we do. That's why I love the Enneagram because it really helps me put things into perspective. Why did I react that way?
00:14:51
Speaker
why did I do that? And if I don't know why, was it proper? Was it required?
Encouragement for Self-awareness
00:15:00
Speaker
Or, you know, like, just asking yourself questions. There's this book that I read a while ago called Change Your Questions, Change Your Life.
00:15:10
Speaker
And it's so true. The book is exactly how it sounds. And so it just taught me to kind of change the perspective of rather than being on the defense, why don't I just like ask myself like, why this is important? Why am I reacting this way? Do I need to react this way?
00:15:30
Speaker
Do I want to care about this so much or am I just being defensive just because that is my natural reaction? And that's something to think about for yourself is that what is my natural reaction and is that appropriate for every circumstance that we encounter? Probably not, to be honest.
00:15:49
Speaker
But I get this asked a lot, you know, people asking me, why do I do this? Why am I like this? What do I do for this? And it's just like, I don't have the answers you do, which is great. But it's just a matter of where you're at in your self-awareness, personal growth journey. And it just is so
00:16:15
Speaker
Like 2023, right? It is just such a modern-day thing yourself help journey like I roll right but I'm now like on the on the other side of all that. Well, I'm not perfect We're always growing and learning and evolving but I went through a very long period of my life where because it's obviously
00:16:41
Speaker
You know, it's just like fitness is a good example. The time from before you started your fitness journey versus now, like it's just so different, right? Your goals are different now than they were then. Like then it may have been just to have a six pack or some people are, I just want to walk up the stairs without huffing, puffing. Well, we all do that still. Don't, don't ever have that as a goal. Um,
00:17:10
Speaker
But seeing myself now versus when I first began this journey of reading every book I could get my hands on, thinking about it, trying to implement it, and just really overall just trying to be a better person. Walter?
00:17:27
Speaker
Thank you, boy. He's being really loud. Yeah, just trying to be like a better person. So that's just what I really want to encourage you guys to do. And that's why podcasting, this is one reason why podcasting is my dream, to give my advice to the world.
00:17:45
Speaker
This sounds so bad, but it's just like I want to be able to tell people, ew, Walter. Okay. I crushed the poor little man's dreams and took his toy away. I'll give it back as soon as I'm done.
00:18:02
Speaker
But anyway, that is just really what I want to leave behind in this world is just try to make or not make. I mean, if I could force everyone to be a better person, I would trust me. But that is just the mark I want to leave on this world is to hopefully inspire just one person, five people to wake up more than once a week and think,
00:18:32
Speaker
how could I make today
Dream of Inspiring Growth
00:18:34
Speaker
better? How could I be a better spouse today? How can I be a better friend or daughter or whatever it is? Even if it's just like one small thing, can I pick up a book that I've been meaning to read that I feel would be really helpful for my life? Or even if it's just an audio book or going to therapy or just getting a life coach, anything.
00:18:54
Speaker
Anything in that pursuit of growth is what obviously what the fit femme project is about overall um But that's just what I want to be able to do for everyone listening and I feel like i've just been on my little soapbox and I don't
00:19:15
Speaker
which is great because I've never really talked this much without getting interrupted. So I think this is great for me. I really like this for me. So anyway, but that is probably where I will leave you guys off today until next week.
Listener Appreciation
00:19:34
Speaker
Besides all that, I just want to say thank you to all of you who do listen every week, our OG listeners, our FitFam project ladies. Thank you so, so much. Your support means everything to us and we can't keep doing this without y'all and especially if you recommend or review the podcast and that just means everything to us because that is the best way to grow and to gain
00:20:01
Speaker
a larger following and to spread our message to the rest of the world. If you're anybody who I've ever been around and I've looked at you and your face and said, are you listening? Are you following? Have you subscribed? I just did that with a friend in town. She's not on social media, so I told her about the podcast before it launched. She's like, yeah, let me know and I'll start listening to it because she loves podcasts. I'm like, perfect.
00:20:30
Speaker
One more listener. But she was in town just this past weekend, and I was like, oh, have you listened? Because I texted her. I asked her if she had started listening. She goes, no, I totally forgot. I was like, give me your phone.
00:20:45
Speaker
so i grabbed it from her and clicked the little follow button and all that so for you og listeners and i can name some of you right now um next time you're at your little um church group or your little workout class grab your friend's phones and just click that little button just
00:21:04
Speaker
Be a cool be cool. All right Anyway until next time you guys have a great rest of the week. We love you and talk to you later
00:21:19
Speaker
Thanks for listening to the FFP Alignment Podcast.
Podcast Sign-off
00:21:22
Speaker
Please support us by downloading, rating, and recommending us to your friends and family. Be sure to check us out on Instagram at TheFitFemProject. That's F-I-T-F-E-M-M-E Project. And for those of you looking to find their central balance of lifestyle and fitness, book a free consult by going to TheFitFemProject.com.
00:21:41
Speaker
That's F-I-T-F-E-M-M-E, project.com and click apply now. Until next time, this is the Fitment Project alignment podcast.