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EPISODE 3--Don't Put Them Babies Out
26 Plays1 year ago
In this powerful episode of From StartUp to TakeOver, we explore what it truly means to protect, nurture, and uplift children in the Black community to lead them towards entrepreneurship. Don’t Put Them Babies Out isn’t just a saying—it’s a mindset. We break down how families can create safe emotional spaces where kids feel loved, supported, and free to grow without the weight of adult burdens too soon on their path to becoming entrepreneurs. As two cousins committed to connection and confidence, we share real stories, lived experience, and practical tips to empower parents and guardians to stay present and intentional. It’s time we stop rushing our children to move out of the home just to get a job. Don’t Put Them Babies Out—let’s hold space for their healing, their joy, and their journey. 💬 Tune in, share your thoughts in the comments, and join the movement to protect our future—because Don’t Put Them Babies Out is how we break generational cycles.
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Transcript
Family Business vs Entrepreneurship
00:00:00
Tanya Ruttley
one and working for someone, right? you can You can work for your family business if the family has already started one. But let's just say like right now where we are today, the majority don't have that in play, right?
00:00:14
Kim Fletcher
What do
00:00:14
Tanya Ruttley
So how do we start? So would that just be introducing it, making sure you're putting it out there, even though our family, let's say someone's family who does not have a business that their children can go work for,
00:00:19
Kim Fletcher
what did you mean?
00:00:29
Tanya Ruttley
work for to at least still start the entrepreneurship conversation, right?
00:00:34
Kim Fletcher
Right. But have your if you if you're guiding them to that, be we we don't think that way because we didn't ever have it.
00:00:36
Tanya Ruttley
Go ahead.
00:00:43
Kim Fletcher
So we're not going to think that way to guide them into being entrepreneurs. if ah if you it Whatever you're instilling the child at home as they grow, it's like a sponge. They're going to absorb it.
00:00:57
Kim Fletcher
And they're either going to keep it or let it dry. And if you keep watering, they will grow and maybe want to stay at home because now, oh, we you know we're putting into them and they feel like we are there for them instead of wanting them to leave.
00:01:03
Tanya Ruttley
Mm-hmm.
00:01:21
Kim Fletcher
Because i sometimes I believe the kids are ready to go because we make them feel like we have to leave instead of making them feel like, no, you can stay here because I'm putting into you.
Influence of Family on Career Choices
00:01:33
Kim Fletcher
you know i'm i'm i'm i'm putting time in with you i'm helping you you don't have to go versus you graduate you getting out of here you're going to school you're going to get a job you remember i was saying that last time but you was like ah
00:01:33
Tanya Ruttley
Uh-huh.
00:01:49
Kim Fletcher
you know what's your opinion
00:01:52
Tanya Ruttley
I'm pretty much the same because and the reason why I I say i agree that let me say this first. I do agree that it should be introduced.
00:02:03
Tanya Ruttley
The only thing for me is I don't think that it's an automatic that they're going to want to do it right. Only because that was my personal experience, my children's experience.
00:02:14
Tanya Ruttley
So you do have those dynamics where you're talking about it, you're showing them, right? But it's not what they want at that time.
00:02:21
Kim Fletcher
At what age?
00:02:23
Tanya Ruttley
What
00:02:23
Kim Fletcher
At what age?
00:02:28
Tanya Ruttley
what do you mean at what age? For me, um i was in elementary my parents.
00:02:30
Kim Fletcher
What age do you start? What age do you start?
00:02:33
Tanya Ruttley
You start, I think like my, so I have a six-year-old. He see everything that I do, right?
00:02:37
Kim Fletcher
You're right.
00:02:40
Tanya Ruttley
He knows that his parents have their own business, but at this point he still, he's six, right?
00:02:40
Kim Fletcher
Yeah.
00:02:46
Tanya Ruttley
He wants to join the military.
00:02:47
Kim Fletcher
You're right.
00:02:49
Tanya Ruttley
So, well, let me say, let me, let me, let me take this back.
00:02:49
Kim Fletcher
Why? Because...
00:02:53
Tanya Ruttley
That's one of the things he wants to do. He also wanted to be a governor, right?
00:02:55
Kim Fletcher
Why?
00:02:58
Tanya Ruttley
Right.
00:02:58
Kim Fletcher
Okay, okay.
00:02:59
Tanya Ruttley
yeah He said he wanted to be a governor. He wants to be a police. So he he looks at different things and whatever kind of draws you know in his attention is what he'll say at the moment that he wants to do.
00:03:13
Kim Fletcher
Where is he getting most of his guidance from to want to do those things?
00:03:13
Tanya Ruttley
So
00:03:17
Kim Fletcher
Where where is he getting that from?
00:03:19
Tanya Ruttley
his home.
00:03:21
Kim Fletcher
From you, the dad, the brothers, the sisters?
00:03:22
Tanya Ruttley
but
00:03:24
Kim Fletcher
Okay.
00:03:24
Tanya Ruttley
hu But so did my daughter. So did my sons and Even with my daughter.
00:03:29
Kim Fletcher
At younger age.
00:03:30
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah, she started, I would say, probably around eight or nine.
00:03:31
Kim Fletcher
Right.
00:03:33
Tanya Ruttley
She knew about the entrepreneurship. um And she first said she wanted to own her own bakery. And then that has changed, right? Again, ah told you the route that she wants to take.
00:03:41
Kim Fletcher
but
00:03:43
Tanya Ruttley
So, and that's why I feel it should be introduced to let them know that they don't have to go out and work for someone all their years, right?
00:03:50
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
00:03:54
Tanya Ruttley
that they can take another route and even through the entrepreneurship thing. um So for me, I feel it's something that should be introduced but not mandated because it is proven ah you can go out and gri build these great corporations and leave it to your children. They'll sell it.
00:04:13
Tanya Ruttley
So I think people have to make sure that it's something their children want And they're not saying it just to get it. It just think about, um want to, let me finish my thought to just get it.
00:04:26
Tanya Ruttley
And then when you pass on, they sell your corporation that you've worked years for, because this also happens with real estate.
00:04:29
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
00:04:35
Tanya Ruttley
These, these ah parents have these homes. They're outright, the family, the parents pass and those kids sell that house for a dollar instead of keeping it in the family. Right.
00:04:48
Tanya Ruttley
And.
The Freedom to Explore Career Paths
00:04:49
Tanya Ruttley
splitting the profits from it and growing from there and adding more rental profit is proven over and over again. Everybody don't want the same thing.
00:04:58
Tanya Ruttley
Give it to those who want the same thing, which is why it's great to introduce it. And if they want it, it's there. Hey, if they come back around later and want it, the opportunity is there.
00:05:10
Tanya Ruttley
That's what I like.
00:05:12
Kim Fletcher
and and and and that And that's good.
00:05:12
Tanya Ruttley
Um,
00:05:14
Kim Fletcher
And the thing about it is that they know that mom or dad is not rushing them out home and they may want to stay because of that.
00:05:23
Tanya Ruttley
Yep. Yep. Mm-hmm.
00:05:26
Kim Fletcher
They may want to stay home and like be entrepreneurs or help me or whatever, whatever.
00:05:26
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah.
00:05:32
Kim Fletcher
They may want to stay home and do that because now you are still like your baby. He wants to go off and be a governor, but he's six years old and he
00:05:40
Tanya Ruttley
He's sick.
00:05:41
Kim Fletcher
He, he, maybe he will keep that mentality that he wants to be a governor, but maybe not, but because he, you've introduced him to so on many avenues of life in modern well, military, not, um, entrepreneur, but the other things that you have introduced them to them, it's kind of like, and governor is entrepreneur to me.
00:05:44
Tanya Ruttley
Right.
00:05:48
Tanya Ruttley
Yep. Mm-hmm.
00:05:56
Tanya Ruttley
ah
00:06:06
Kim Fletcher
You gotta to be a governor to go be a governor.
00:06:11
Kim Fletcher
I think so. You you have to.
00:06:13
Tanya Ruttley
You're taken care of. You wouldn't have to be an entrepreneur to go be a governor, though. But, you know.
00:06:18
Kim Fletcher
Well, not in the sense of anything.
00:06:19
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah. But just what I what I like is and what um I'm actually practicing. And I think families are doing this now. And that's another thing.
00:06:31
Tanya Ruttley
I noticed that you do be saying, you do be saying, girl, if the Georgia ain't came out of me just
00:06:38
Tanya Ruttley
then.
00:06:40
Kim Fletcher
Okay. Yeah. Well, was it
00:06:42
Tanya Ruttley
But people are introducing these things. um
00:06:49
Tanya Ruttley
Right. And I think it's because the exposure is out here now. Because when you say kids, you know, they're ready to leave home, if I can know cousins, they weren't ready to leave home and they didn't leave home and they had nothing to do with entrepreneurship.
00:07:04
Tanya Ruttley
They were not ready to leave home and they didn't leave home for a while, you know?
00:07:08
Kim Fletcher
yeah well what it How was the temperature in the home with them not leaving home for while?
00:07:14
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah. So that's, that's, that's another thing. Um, I think that, that plays a part.
00:07:17
Kim Fletcher
Yeah. Yeah.
00:07:20
Tanya Ruttley
I think we was
Balancing Values and Aspirations
00:07:21
Tanya Ruttley
kind of, about to get into that on Tuesday when you were like, are we running these babies off? I think to a certain degree. Yes.
00:07:29
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm. Yes.
00:07:29
Tanya Ruttley
Um, let's start getting the itch, you know, probably when they're what, 15, 16, they're smelling themselves as we like to say as parents.
00:07:32
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:07:35
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:07:38
Tanya Ruttley
I was ready to um escape, as I call it, not understanding completely, but I was ready to start my own family.
00:07:44
Kim Fletcher
um
00:07:45
Tanya Ruttley
See, I never was the kind, which is why I pushed back with my my dad um early on. I wanted to get married. I wanted to have a family.
00:07:57
Tanya Ruttley
i wasn't trying to seek money. I had in my head to get married, have children and raise a family.
00:08:09
Tanya Ruttley
Life swung me in this direction where I am now. But this was never my ultimate thing. I don't think business-wise is the go-all for majority of us.
00:08:27
Tanya Ruttley
I think family unit, right?
00:08:27
Kim Fletcher
Yep. Mm-hmm.
00:08:30
Tanya Ruttley
I think with the family unit being pushed in another, I can't even say in another direction, not even being pushed, it seems, I don't know, but I kind of feel like too many people have been taught to go get the money.
00:08:48
Kim Fletcher
yeah
00:08:48
Tanya Ruttley
And it could, I could feel that way because it's what I see on social media. Cause if I go backwards, when I was younger, Well, no, yeah, because I was told, go to school, you know, start your own business.
00:09:01
Kim Fletcher
well
00:09:02
Tanya Ruttley
It was still me. And I just have a scene where I feel the family unit has been kind of pushed on the back burner.
00:09:15
Tanya Ruttley
And in doing so, um i also feel that's because a lot of us aren't spiritually guided properly.
00:09:23
Kim Fletcher
about to say it because we the world now or in past they're living on They're living opposite of what the word says.
00:09:36
Kim Fletcher
And the word says labor to rest. Instead of labor to rest, we labor to work. We labor to slave. In the words, they labor to rest in what he's done.
00:09:47
Kim Fletcher
So people are not laboring to rest in what Jesus has done. They're laboring to get rich.
00:09:54
Tanya Ruttley
absolutely
00:09:56
Kim Fletcher
No one's laboring to rest. That's what I'm saying. So I, me, even though I had that spiritual in my family, but I didn't know. So I wasn't taught to labor the rest, labor your, to go to work.
00:10:09
Kim Fletcher
So do you want your little shoes? You want to look like this? You want this or that? Look where you're living labor to go to work. I was never taught to labor the rest. That's why I say, you know, better, you do better.
00:10:19
Kim Fletcher
Now everyone's not going to do what I do because everyone's not on my level of where I am spiritually. And spiritually is for me now that I know better.
Purpose and Spiritual Guidance
00:10:31
Kim Fletcher
I will label to rest and meaning like I would tell him one time I told my son and then I was like, tell him he was going, you know, having a little problem with getting the job. Well, years and years and years ago.
00:10:45
Kim Fletcher
And I was like, okay, God don't need you to be panicking or nothing because of bringing anything, any kind of word is not going to help anything. It's not going to bring one thing to your life. you need he said he don't need anything for you but to believe and to rest and i said not to what people take as i said to believe and just rest don't do anything no if you you know you got to have a job you you know you want to work and you want to make money and you have to go get a job because you don't have any other source or any other thing going on you have to go put an application in you have to let the people know you want the job
00:11:23
Kim Fletcher
that's laboring to rest do your part and then rest and letting god know let him do the rest so that's what i'm saying to teach them the way they should go not to label to go out there and just work work work work work no no labor to rest and hear what god say and because he may give you that job that where you sweatless victory which we don't know because we just pushing them to work, work, work. And if we, if they don't work, work, work, we cussing them out. They're sorry. They're not doing this. They're doing that. So, oh, those babies gone.
00:11:55
Kim Fletcher
We put them out. Stop putting them babies out.
00:11:59
Tanya Ruttley
So I hear you.
00:11:59
Kim Fletcher
So.
00:12:02
Kim Fletcher
Yeah.
00:12:03
Tanya Ruttley
And I think that I'm losing my train of thought.
00:12:03
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:12:07
Kim Fletcher
Yeah. Cause I threw you off with saying what that word said. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
00:12:11
Tanya Ruttley
Oh, no, no, not about what, no, no, no, not about what the word says. um That's not throwing me off. What's throwing me off um was, oh, I had it right on the tip of my tongue.
00:12:23
Tanya Ruttley
Oh, it'll come back to me. But it has something to do with don't put them babies out before you came back around and said, don't put them babies out.
00:12:28
Kim Fletcher
yeah yeah we're putting them out
00:12:31
Tanya Ruttley
That's what it was tied to.
00:12:34
Tanya Ruttley
Oh, there I'm glad you just said that. So I haven't seen it, though. I hear you, but I don't see that, right?
00:12:43
Kim Fletcher
why don't you see it your your your dad and and your mom put you out because you they didn't put you out for say no no not wait wait i'm just
00:12:43
Tanya Ruttley
Because, so if I look at... Hold on. Hold on, baby. Hold on. My parents can help me out.
00:12:53
Tanya Ruttley
What mean? Help me out.
00:12:55
Kim Fletcher
not for say save it not they get out latrice i'm saying by your growing up and seeing things you are ready to go it's like they put you out yeah that's what i'm saying
00:13:06
Tanya Ruttley
Oh, well, I was ready to get married. No, no. Okay. So what I, okay, let's go back to what I was saying as far as me.
00:13:13
Kim Fletcher
go back from the mic
00:13:14
Tanya Ruttley
um I was ready as a young child, a teenager, right? So I fell in love in high school. I was ready to get married and have my own children because not from looking at it like, oh, my parents, like I got to hurry up get up out of here or my life is just so miserable. and No, I was ready because I thought as even as a child, I've been praying to God in the morning and in in the evening since I was seven years old.
00:13:41
Tanya Ruttley
I thought and I still feel my thing is family unit.
00:13:47
Tanya Ruttley
So I was ready to start my life.
00:13:47
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:13:48
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:13:51
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:13:52
Tanya Ruttley
And I didn't want it to be through college. I didn't want to go to college. I didn't want to go start my own business. I wanted to get married, start on that family unit. And I had this whole idea and my marriage was horrible.
00:14:07
Tanya Ruttley
ah So from there, I decided to get a job because I wasn't working when I was married, but I decided to get a job so I can take care of at the time my one child, um which is when I joined the military while I was separated from my my ex-husband.
00:14:24
Tanya Ruttley
So for me, it was because I thought what we're supposed to do as women, get yourself a husband, raise your children, take care of your family.
00:14:35
Tanya Ruttley
That's why I was ready to go.
00:14:37
Kim Fletcher
Well, I didn't think that, like...
00:14:39
Tanya Ruttley
Not right. No, I got you. I hear you. And so even when, if I look at my siblings, um, with, with my sister that lived in the house, we were thinking, get married and let's, you know, do this and relationships go bad and people turn based off of a relationship going bad.
00:14:42
Kim Fletcher
No.
00:15:00
Tanya Ruttley
At least what I've seen for women, right?
00:15:04
Tanya Ruttley
The process. Go ahead.
00:15:04
Kim Fletcher
And and that's why it that's why it's level to these things because like to you you, you were ready to go for the reason of you just want to go be married and whatever, whatever.
00:15:09
Tanya Ruttley
It is. It is.
00:15:18
Kim Fletcher
I didn't because my brain was still a child brain and it wasn't functioning like that. And it wasn't thinking about you getting married because you want to get married and be a wife. no
00:15:29
Tanya Ruttley
So you didn't think that at a yeah at a young age?
00:15:29
Kim Fletcher
I still had a, like I did not, I did not think that at a young age.
00:15:31
Tanya Ruttley
Mm-hmm.
00:15:33
Kim Fletcher
I did not because i that's not, it was no thinking like that. It was just thinking you're in love. I didn't really understand what marriage you It wouldn't work. I was just in love and I was in love with my husband, just in love, just in love and didn't know anything.
00:15:50
Kim Fletcher
i didn't know nothing about that. It's a lot of things going on. My brain was still a child brain. That's why I said, if we got them only the way they should go, some maybe they won't. And and maybe it's good to be married at an early age or out the house or going to school at an early age for some people, but some people stop may need extra maturity.
00:16:06
Tanya Ruttley
For some. Yep. Yeah.
00:16:12
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah. Yeah.
00:16:13
Kim Fletcher
And we put them out in
00:16:14
Tanya Ruttley
And that's why I was saying, remember,
Independence and Family Dynamics
00:16:15
Kim Fletcher
there.
00:16:15
Tanya Ruttley
remember I was saying on Tuesday, I just think the family dynamic would determine that stuff is, is, I don't believe it's in, let's just send everybody this route. I think it all depends on the family dynamics.
00:16:29
Tanya Ruttley
Um, and these little people have voices, especially when we're talking about 17, 18, right?
00:16:30
Kim Fletcher
It does.
00:16:33
Tanya Ruttley
Because we all develop differently.
00:16:34
Kim Fletcher
Right?
00:16:36
Kim Fletcher
Yeah.
00:16:36
Tanya Ruttley
So that's why for me, I kept saying, it just really depends. I couldn't give an absolute Yes, now the introduction, absolutely. But I also think if your child is an artist, because you should tap into that. I think it's whatever area their little brain is sending them in, we should go, you know what?
00:17:01
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah, because remember what the six-year-old told you? he I remember he was like three and a half, honey. He was talking about he wanted to direct a movie. You see what I'm saying? So we went through that.
00:17:09
Kim Fletcher
yeah it
00:17:11
Tanya Ruttley
went through those discussions and start practicing. that That's what I'm saying. Wherever their mind goes, you talk and lead them and guide them, but still let them do.
00:17:20
Kim Fletcher
And pour into pour into them, let them grow.
00:17:22
Tanya Ruttley
Huh? Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah.
00:17:27
Kim Fletcher
and then and
00:17:27
Tanya Ruttley
But the household...
00:17:29
Kim Fletcher
If you're pouring into them and letting them grow and it's not the stigma of the world.
00:17:36
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah.
00:17:37
Kim Fletcher
It's get a job, go finish school, go to college, get a job, get a family.
00:17:41
Tanya Ruttley
yeah ah
00:17:42
Kim Fletcher
That is not life. like you don't have That is not life. like If you know better, you'll do better. like We know better. Let's train the kids of the way they go. Pour into them. Maybe we didn't get poured into. like We can now.
00:17:57
Kim Fletcher
Like you say, you have time. So you have time to pour into your six-year-old. Take that time and pour into him, pour into him. Then maybe when he turn of age, 18, mom, I'm not ready to go.
00:18:11
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah, I mean, it's not just my six-year-old, if I keep saying. It's my other ones, too.
00:18:15
Kim Fletcher
Oh, ah yeah, you know, I'm just using that baby because, yeah.
00:18:16
Tanya Ruttley
My kids just chose not to do it. um
00:18:19
Kim Fletcher
Yeah, yeah, hear you.
00:18:20
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah, I think...
00:18:21
Kim Fletcher
I was just using, I hear you on that.
00:18:21
Tanya Ruttley
And I think it's a lot... But you know what? This is why i'm saying I don't really know because...
00:18:30
Kim Fletcher
every like Every story is different.
00:18:32
Tanya Ruttley
No, I want me to talk about, I'm not even talking about just myself at this point. I'm go i'm thinking of even friends um and their children, young adults stay with them while they're figuring it out. I don't, that's what I'm saying. I don't know if it's really, you can't, cause I actually, my personal opinion, what I've seen a lot of is they, say yeah they got their nipple and but got the kid's mouth on their nipple too long.
00:19:00
Tanya Ruttley
That's my personal opinion. That's why I feel,
00:19:02
Kim Fletcher
Why you say that?
00:19:02
Tanya Ruttley
lot of Because a lot them'm stay at at home because they sitting at home.
00:19:04
Kim Fletcher
Why you say that?
00:19:06
Tanya Ruttley
ah A lot of them nothing.
00:19:07
Kim Fletcher
And doing nothing? Okay, that's the difference.
00:19:11
Tanya Ruttley
um Exactly.
00:19:11
Kim Fletcher
I
00:19:11
Tanya Ruttley
That's why I said it it's just it's where do we start now? That's why I think it's about now. Like, are you talking to your friends with these type conversations? um
00:19:21
Kim Fletcher
ah what i don't, not of adults, because they have grown babies
00:19:21
Tanya Ruttley
Have you started having it yet?
00:19:30
Kim Fletcher
yeah It's time to start with babies because adults are grown now.
00:19:32
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah, but they got grandkids, right?
00:19:35
Kim Fletcher
Who?
00:19:35
Tanya Ruttley
do you Do your friends have grandkids yet? Or they like me?
00:19:37
Kim Fletcher
Yeah. So, yeah. So I do. We do talk about pouring into the kids now. Well, the ones who have time and the ones who don't have time, they pouring into the kids in a way where they're showing them love and I'm here, I'm here, but they're still like,
00:19:50
Tanya Ruttley
Yep.
00:19:55
Tanya Ruttley
Mm-hmm.
00:19:59
Kim Fletcher
they still have to work. And so the kids still see them work really hard and long to get what they need, get the necessities to have a roof over their head, car to drive, food in mouth.
00:20:07
Tanya Ruttley
Ah.
00:20:13
Tanya Ruttley
Yep.
00:20:14
Kim Fletcher
They still see that.
00:20:16
Tanya Ruttley
Mm-hmm.
00:20:16
Kim Fletcher
So there's no one that's resting to show the kids like you can still rest and
00:20:20
Tanya Ruttley
Mm-hmm.
00:20:24
Kim Fletcher
and be successful everyone's still slaving you can still be on a job and resting but you you probably have to figure out yeah that's why right
00:20:34
Tanya Ruttley
So one of the things that I think that tie into that is a lot of us don't know our purpose for being here. And here's the thing.
00:20:39
Kim Fletcher
right
00:20:40
Tanya Ruttley
We all have a purpose. That's why we're here. The thing is a lot of people or a lot of us don't know that. Right?
00:20:50
Kim Fletcher
right
00:20:51
Tanya Ruttley
So without even knowing that, how are they supposed to move forward? Which is why I was saying, well, have you started the conversation? Right?
00:20:59
Kim Fletcher
because of people Because we lack the knowledge.
00:20:59
Tanya Ruttley
That's a conversation piece.
00:21:02
Kim Fletcher
we na
00:21:02
Tanya Ruttley
Right.
00:21:03
Kim Fletcher
We lack knowledge. And that's why we perish.
00:21:05
Tanya Ruttley
Right.
00:21:06
Kim Fletcher
Because we lack knowledge.
00:21:08
Tanya Ruttley
I got that part.
00:21:09
Kim Fletcher
And I'm talking about God's knowledge.
00:21:10
Tanya Ruttley
Right. But what I'm,
00:21:12
Kim Fletcher
Go ahead.
00:21:13
Tanya Ruttley
Gotcha. But what I'm talking about is, so you got to start on your end, having those conversations with your friends. I've got to start on my end, having those conversations with my friends because we're doing it.
00:21:20
Kim Fletcher
Right.
00:21:24
Tanya Ruttley
Cause you told me already, you've started with your grandchildren. I've started with my children, my children, and can't wait to get the grandchildren.
00:21:27
Kim Fletcher
I do. do.
00:21:30
Tanya Ruttley
Oh, let me take that back.
00:21:30
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:21:31
Tanya Ruttley
I got a couple more years, a year and a half. Then I want to start getting the grandchildren, but um it's great to start having that dialogue with
Pursuing Passion Amidst Stability
00:21:39
Tanya Ruttley
our friends and family members, right?
00:21:39
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And I do, I still do.
00:21:42
Tanya Ruttley
Um, it's one of the things that I, I like to say is you can have a job, work on that passion in the middle of the night.
00:21:43
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:21:49
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:21:52
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:21:52
Tanya Ruttley
You know, I listened to someone called Dr. Miles Monroe and that's, that's one of the things that he says. And I agree, have your job because you you know, people have to eat and how people start family, you know, early.
00:22:03
Kim Fletcher
right
00:22:06
Tanya Ruttley
I did, you know, I got married at 19, had a baby at 20, but
00:22:10
Kim Fletcher
Right.
00:22:12
Tanya Ruttley
Talk to God to find out what your purpose is. And then in the middle of the night, or not necessarily middle of the night, but when you get home, you got got your um yeah you're got your day job taken care of, work on you.
00:22:28
Tanya Ruttley
Because work is you.
00:22:29
Kim Fletcher
Right.
00:22:30
Tanya Ruttley
It's you. That's what work is. It's you. So that's when you can feel.
00:22:32
Kim Fletcher
Right.
00:22:34
Tanya Ruttley
So I don't see nothing wrong with, you know, saying somebody work hard.
00:22:37
Kim Fletcher
Where is it?
00:22:39
Tanya Ruttley
It should be you working hard. on yourself.
00:22:43
Kim Fletcher
Right, but it's hard to try retrain the mind.
00:22:48
Tanya Ruttley
Eh, eh, minds got changed, so I don't know.
00:22:49
Kim Fletcher
Yeah.
00:22:51
Kim Fletcher
yeah youth Yeah, like, yeah, it's sometimes when you've been trained a certain way for years and years and years and years and years and that's all you know, it's hard to change to look at something else.
00:22:52
Tanya Ruttley
But hold on. So I will tell you, they told me this even when I was younger. I'm a very, I'm very optimistic. So.
00:23:07
Tanya Ruttley
Mm-hmm.
00:23:07
Kim Fletcher
That's where we perish. hairs from lack of knowledge because we don't know and people think you you want to hear what the world have to say no you need to hear what the bible has to say because if people listen and read it's the blueprint for your everyday life and then you won't you have time to pour into those babies you will have time to pour into that but i'm not talking you you're saying point to all of them like i said grown-ups it's hard retrain the mind or change their ways but a little kid you train them up the way you want them to go that little kid gonna either accept it or not but it's in them they're trained like a when my kids used to tell me i talked about god so much or they were in church or whatever they were trained as little kids as little kids and then after a teenage type thing a little bit and after that high school
00:23:46
Tanya Ruttley
Uh-huh.
00:24:03
Kim Fletcher
the God kind of went away. You get what saying? Not went away, but went away.
00:24:07
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah. yeah Yeah, I got your background. Uh-huh.
00:24:10
Kim Fletcher
So but because they were trained as a child, they always went back.
00:24:10
Tanya Ruttley
Put them on.
00:24:13
Tanya Ruttley
Uh-huh.
00:24:16
Tanya Ruttley
like Absolutely.
00:24:17
Kim Fletcher
They always went back.
00:24:18
Tanya Ruttley
ah hu
00:24:19
Kim Fletcher
And that's what I'm saying. if we train the children, and they can go back to what we train, the little kids to what we're training. They will never lose it. Even if they don't use it, they'll never lose it and maybe want to do it.
00:24:32
Tanya Ruttley
Right. and ah but But I also think we'll be able to still capture some
00:24:39
Kim Fletcher
Right.
00:24:39
Tanya Ruttley
Adults, right. I'm one of those.
00:24:40
Kim Fletcher
right
00:24:41
Tanya Ruttley
um I'm sorry. I just feel that there's always an opportunity for change as long as you're not six feet deep. That's just how I think. um So for me, and this is something I recall you tell my husband um when he was a I think I told you this before. I can't remember, honey, um when he was a teacher.
00:25:00
Tanya Ruttley
you know, assistant or something like that, he had these two kids that were just, he just felt they weren't listening. I said, honey, you got to keep pouring into them. You have to keep telling them because everybody have alone moments.
00:25:15
Tanya Ruttley
And in those moments, you have no idea what's going to come back to them. So you got to put it in them first. They have to hear it first. And sometimes you have to hear it over and over and over again.
00:25:22
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:25:27
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:25:27
Tanya Ruttley
Before something can click. That happens.
00:25:30
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:25:31
Tanya Ruttley
That's real. So even the adults, don't count them out. They're still here. You do your part.
00:25:37
Kim Fletcher
move that
00:25:38
Tanya Ruttley
you you You walk in what God has for you to speak to them. And you have that conversation. Because all we have to do is tell them. What they do with it is on them. And we never know who's going to go, wait a minute.
00:25:52
Tanya Ruttley
Huh. Because see, you could have said something to them six months ago. all of a sudden they're on social media and they see something that they do regularly. Right.
00:26:02
Kim Fletcher
Right.
00:26:02
Tanya Ruttley
And then they're, they could be like, wait a minute. That's what I, I can get paid doing it. So that's what I'm saying. We need to just start having the conversations, even with our friends and then let God do his work.
00:26:14
Tanya Ruttley
It and now it's not for us to beat them up. It's just for us to put it out there and have faith that it may sometimes that work, you know, it takes a while.
00:26:16
Kim Fletcher
No, no. Mm-hmm.
00:26:25
Tanya Ruttley
But let God work on that part. You've done your part to introduce that because we never know where information is coming from. Well, that's why I was saying just even I know you're saying with the babies, with the babies. Absolutely.
00:26:38
Tanya Ruttley
But also with your adult friends, your adult family members, because people don't know. talk to family members. I just don't tell everybody the family members that I talk to. And I'm always telling them, yo it's not over yet.
00:26:53
Tanya Ruttley
We can always change it. Now, here's the same.
00:26:55
Kim Fletcher
to believe that.
00:26:56
Tanya Ruttley
Huh?
00:26:57
Kim Fletcher
People have to believe that, I think. like right now in the climate it's like people are not it's like a lazy syndrome
00:27:08
Tanya Ruttley
Hmm.
00:27:09
Kim Fletcher
it's not even really lazy syndrome it's like not lazy just take that back i take that back it's like you they don't want to work hard for it it's just give it to me let me get it right now don't i don't want to learn anything you give it to me right now so that's why i
00:27:22
Tanya Ruttley
That's what I think it is. Yeah. they it
00:27:26
Tanya Ruttley
It's my money and I want it now. Mm-hmm.
00:27:29
Kim Fletcher
Right. So that's why I say if you you train them smaller, then and they can be saying, I want it right now because they're learning it and learning it and learning it and learning.
00:27:39
Kim Fletcher
And once they get up age, then they can want it and maybe become entrepreneurs. That's what I'm saying. You know, I'm playing, ah you know,
00:27:50
Kim Fletcher
giving it the, I can't even say the word, but go ahead. I can't even say, I'm trying to say the word, what I'm trying to say.
00:27:59
Tanya Ruttley
I can't help you out, honey, because I'm trying what was she trying to say?
00:28:02
Kim Fletcher
Yeah, you were about trying to, I couldn't
00:28:03
Tanya Ruttley
But yeah. So I think that's something you and I can um probably tap into. I'll discuss that with you offline. Something you just said, um I think I want to do.
00:28:12
Kim Fletcher
do that.
00:28:14
Tanya Ruttley
But yeah, so I definitely, I'm umm with you about don't put the babies out.
00:28:14
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
00:28:20
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:28:20
Tanya Ruttley
um
00:28:21
Kim Fletcher
Yeah, we have to ease up on on them a little bit because we was used to be so hard.
00:28:25
Tanya Ruttley
We do.
00:28:27
Kim Fletcher
We have to ease up, just ease up a little bit. This generation, we need to ease up and just show a little bit more care, and maybe they will, you know, change their ways or thinking.
Connecting and Inspiring Listeners
00:28:40
Kim Fletcher
It's just like, maybe I feel like some of them don't feel love or nothing was poured into them and they're on the wrong path.
00:28:47
Tanya Ruttley
and
00:28:48
Kim Fletcher
So that's why I feel like if we pour into babies now, then maybe we won't have what we have now.
00:28:57
Tanya Ruttley
I got you. I got you.
00:29:00
Kim Fletcher
yeah
00:29:01
Tanya Ruttley
All right. So I think you guys, we are coming up on the end again.
00:29:06
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:29:06
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah.
00:29:07
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. and like
00:29:08
Tanya Ruttley
It's like, we're we're already here at the end of the third episode. um from startup to take over the watches work podcast.
00:29:22
Tanya Ruttley
So again, as you know, as we continue on our journey, we hope that you guys continue to feel something as we come out here and just have open discussions with you guys. We hope that you were able to feel seen, inspired, heard, and that you can be reminded that you're not alone out here. We're here.
00:29:41
Tanya Ruttley
This space is about real connection. um And again, this is the beginning of our journey.
00:29:45
Kim Fletcher
Thank
00:29:46
Tanya Ruttley
If anything we said hit home, please go ahead and share this episode. Leave us a review and don't forget to um subscribe to us. We've got so much more coming. You can follow us on social media where we are on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and also on YouTube.
00:30:03
Tanya Ruttley
So please stay tapped in and most of all, keep showing up for yourself and we will see you next Tuesday. Oh, I'm sorry. I need to add we are now on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.
00:30:15
Tanya Ruttley
So, um and you will find us every Tuesday and every Thursday at 8 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. Thank you guys for showing up. Have a good evening.
00:30:25
Kim Fletcher
Watch this work.
00:30:57
Tanya Ruttley
Girl, I be so nervous when that thing, I'm like, is it, sit but I see that it do take us off. It take us off. Mm-hmm.
00:31:04
Kim Fletcher
You can get back on now.
00:31:05
Tanya Ruttley
So I was thinking, hmm?
00:31:07
Kim Fletcher
Get back on. Get on. We took us off.
00:31:10
Tanya Ruttley
on.
00:31:11
Kim Fletcher
I don't see you.
00:31:13
Tanya Ruttley
Oh, not the camera. um My L. As long you see the L, that I mean, I'm up on the stage. But I was thinking, maybe we could start something.
00:31:22
Kim Fletcher
How did you think this went? Go. Did you like it? Yeah. you did we have did you like it
00:31:27
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah.
00:31:28
Kim Fletcher
yeah
00:31:28
Tanya Ruttley
Girl, we just talking, so I think it's always good.
00:31:30
Kim Fletcher
Yeah, we just talked. was about to say that when we were getting out, but i forget lost my train and thought i about to say, remember, we're just talking.
00:31:37
Tanya Ruttley
Yep.
00:31:37
Kim Fletcher
But I just said, watch this work. hours was I'll say it the next time.
00:31:40
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah, was about to say, so even in in the beginning, this is how i want to do. So when I say, hey you know, welcome from startup to takeover, and I want you me to come in and do your whole ah watches.
00:31:51
Tanya Ruttley
But I like when you say it like that with the baby.
00:31:52
Kim Fletcher
That just work.
00:31:53
Tanya Ruttley
don't want to say it. I want you say it.
00:31:53
Kim Fletcher
We just talking. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:31:56
Tanya Ruttley
Mm-mm.
00:31:56
Kim Fletcher
Mm-hmm.
00:31:56
Tanya Ruttley
Not to just talk in the watchers work part.
00:31:59
Kim Fletcher
I know it. We just watch us work, baby.
00:31:59
Tanya Ruttley
Oh.
00:32:02
Kim Fletcher
Yeah.
00:32:02
Tanya Ruttley
Yeah.
00:32:02
Kim Fletcher
yeah plan But watch us work.
00:32:03
Tanya Ruttley
Mm-hmm. but
00:32:04
Kim Fletcher
Okay.
00:32:05
Tanya Ruttley
I was thinking that maybe, um wonder if how we get something started where we have, like, event where we just talking to young kids about entrepreneurship.
00:32:17
Kim Fletcher
Uh-huh.
00:32:19
Tanya Ruttley
Start there. um
00:32:20
Kim Fletcher
Uh-huh.
00:32:21
Tanya Ruttley
That kind of popped in my head when we was online. That's why, like, I'll have the discussion with you afterwards.
00:32:26
Kim Fletcher
We need a guest. We need a guest.
00:32:30
Tanya Ruttley
a guest?
00:32:33
Kim Fletcher
You said talk to a ah young adult, right?
00:32:35
Tanya Ruttley
No, us. We don't need no us.
00:32:37
Kim Fletcher
Oh, OK. Oh, I thought you said talk to a young adult.
00:32:41
Tanya Ruttley
and Us to talk to the young kids about entrepreneurship.
00:32:44
Kim Fletcher
Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:32:45
Tanya Ruttley
Hi.
00:32:46
Kim Fletcher
I'm saying how, how, what do you mean, talk to Keith?
00:32:50
Tanya Ruttley
Me and you set up in an event where
00:32:52
Kim Fletcher
Oh, OK. Yeah, yeah. Yes.
00:32:55
Tanya Ruttley
Well, we start introducing what we're talking about.
00:32:57
Kim Fletcher
yes
00:32:57
Tanya Ruttley
Hmm.
00:33:00
Tanya Ruttley
um About entrepreneurship. Yeah. I think, um...
00:33:02
Kim Fletcher
yeah and then and on the next one we could we could talk about i had wrote this uh book uh uh a digital download uh with just a little book i'm gonna send it to you and the name of the book is uh should we let should we let the children should we let our baby speak