Transcript
Tanya Ruttley: Absolutely.
Kim Fletcher: right
Tanya Ruttley: All righty. So we're ready to get started, you guys.
Kim Fletcher: 30
Tanya Ruttley: Sorry about that. We had technical difficulties. you Y'all remember, we are new.
Kim Fletcher: day challenge. yeah
Tanya Ruttley: We are getting started. So definitely bear with us.
Kim Fletcher: Yes. 30 day challenge. You're going to have challenges within those 30 days. Keep going.
Tanya Ruttley: And we are going to keep going. Absolutely.
Kim Fletcher: Dedication.
Tanya Ruttley: Yep.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: Dedication. Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: So Kim, you see today what I popped up there for us. How do you like that title for us to discuss?
Kim Fletcher: I say, God said no primeral sex, but why though?
Kim Fletcher: And what made you ask that? Why though?
Tanya Ruttley: Because I wanted us to tap into, you know, everything is about changing our bloodline, our children, our grandchildren, children. And so I wanted to tap into that because that is one of the things I think that's important in regards to living that kingdom life.
Tanya Ruttley: Right. Um, so I wanted to discuss why do we think God said what he said about the no premarital sex? Um, cause you know, some people feel that it's okay, um, to have that.
Kim Fletcher: But I'm not sure.
Tanya Ruttley: Go ahead.
Kim Fletcher: I'm not sure because you know what? He said that everybody's not you know made to be married. Everyone won't be married. So those that are single, will they not ever have Hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: Pretty much is what he was saying. Because, listen, so if he was saying about fornication because...
Kim Fletcher: come
Tanya Ruttley: but Well, here's here's one of the reasons why I think it's important about this fornication and not having these multiple partners and only your spouse. Because... People go out here, right?
Tanya Ruttley: And remember when I was talking about the men and their issues when they were taught to be loose, then they go and get married and trying to figure out how to turn it off.
Tanya Ruttley: I think that's part of what God had in play. He understood what happens with sex. So to live his way and not cause the challenge that comes with already having these partners, um I think the life could be easier, right?
Tanya Ruttley: Not perfect, but easier.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: Because when a man or a woman, let's take a man.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: He's out here and he he's loose, right?
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: As the young men were taught to be. He meets a freak. But then eventually he meets the woman that has all the qualities of kingdom living.
Tanya Ruttley: But because of his previous experiences and that touching into their fornication, that now becomes an issue in his marriage. He's used to all the things because he's had a partner that's not his wife.
Tanya Ruttley: He now has his wife.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: That becomes an issue in their marriage because he's already had, let's say, a big booty. And he had a he now has a wife with a little booty, right? Or he's had a person with fornication that, I mean, while he was fornicating, that's
Kim Fletcher: right
Tanya Ruttley: into the, um, sexual acts that his wife, um, may not, well, will not have experience with.
Tanya Ruttley: So what I think comes with that is you're bringing outside stuff into your marriage that can now cause a hindrance. So I think there was more to him, God saying about the fornication, because there there is a lot to come with it.
Kim Fletcher: a
Tanya Ruttley: Um,
Tanya Ruttley: having sex with someone that is not your spouse. So I just wanted to tap on that because I think it is for protection um of his kingdom. But something that you said was, because I know, let me not say I know it,
Kim Fletcher: Well, he the scripture does say, you know, if you can't contain yourself, can't control their sexual desires, you know, to be married encourage individuals to marry if they cannot control their sexual desires
Tanya Ruttley: Right. That's what he's saying. So if you need to have sex, he wants you to get married. I mean, don't do it outside of marriage. Right.
Kim Fletcher: mm-hmm
Tanya Ruttley: So, and I think, cause I had got to what my dad, I was having the conversation like, man. So, cause he, it is addressed about those who, you know, some people are born where they can't have, it's a term that's in the Bible. ah It's not coming to me right now, but those who cannot have sex, right.
Tanya Ruttley: Right.
Kim Fletcher: Uh-huh.
Tanya Ruttley: based on their body, then there are those who chose for God not to have sex.
Kim Fletcher: Uh-huh.
Tanya Ruttley: Those other ones, he said, you better get married.
Kim Fletcher: Uh-huh.
Tanya Ruttley: Right. So, but for the other ones that are in between, and these are the people that we're talking about, if they're trying to be kingdom like living, right. It's like, you need to make a choice. Are you going to live for God are you going to live for your earthly needs, which would be the fornication if you don't want to get married, right?
Kim Fletcher: mm-hmm no
Tanya Ruttley: So we understand that God does forgive us, but because he forgives us, though that does that give us a pass to knowingly and purposely, continually walk in wrongdoing?
Kim Fletcher: yeah
Kim Fletcher: no
Tanya Ruttley: That was my torn of the fornication, the premarital sex part. And I wanted us just to discuss that tonight.
Kim Fletcher: yeah I mean, I don't know what else to say bu you besides what we just said, because there's nothing else to say. But you're going to fornicate.
Tanya Ruttley: Right.
Kim Fletcher: You're going against the will of God. You're going against the kingdom.
Tanya Ruttley: Right. Right. And I think that we should, um, have let people know that study God's word and what his expectation is so that you can make a choice, right?
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: That, okay,
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: If I've never done it before, let me truly understand what God's requirements are. If I want to take this path that he's given me free will to choose.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: God ain't telling you, you have to. God is saying you have a choice, but study my word. Get my word in you so that you can understand and make a choice.
Tanya Ruttley: But when you make a choice and you say you want to go that route, he's asking you to make the choice and get married, which is his institution. And that's what I think we also have to understand.
Tanya Ruttley: This ain't man's institution. This ain't the United States of whatever country you live in institution.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: This is God's institution. And he tells us the way to do it. So if we choose to do it,
Kim Fletcher: and
Tanya Ruttley: which I'm learning now,
Tanya Ruttley: get that word in you, know what it represents and then take a choice in that. No one is saying that you're going to be perfect, but understand before you choose to do it and go out here and have premarital sex.
Tanya Ruttley: um And no one is saying that you can't eventually get on the right track. But what Kim and I want, us to do now is to learn what that is supposed to look like so that you go ahead.
Kim Fletcher: so you so that you can represent god and God in a way that he wants you to represent him just like a job if you you're representing a job you have on their uniform or whatever in the military you have to represent the military you have to do as they say you have to read read their books their guidelines and do what they say if you read
Tanya Ruttley: Yes.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: the book, the the Bible and God guideline, then you can represent him in the way where he would like you to represent him.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. Absolutely. Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: And in that way you wouldn't fornicate or you wouldn't go out and do those things. If you had that word in you and you could represent Jesus in the right way.
Tanya Ruttley: In the right way. And you know what? I think a lot of times we always think about, oh, when we leave here, you know, I want to do right because when I leave here, right? But the truth is God telling you to ask for what's in heaven to be done here on earth.
Tanya Ruttley: He wants us to live that life while we are here.
Kim Fletcher: That's the word.
Tanya Ruttley: And I think back in the day, it was always taught, oh, when we leave here, I want to go to, you know, heaven and I want to get to where of God.
Kim Fletcher: Right.
Tanya Ruttley: bring But we think about when eighth when God talked about how to pray, when Jesus talked about how to pray, it said, As it is in heaven.
Kim Fletcher: and
Tanya Ruttley: So it's like.
Kim Fletcher: He said, my will oh my will will be done as it is in heaven.
Tanya Ruttley: As it is in heaven, we want it here on earth. And I think in order to truly get that, we got to start walking the way that Jesus, God <unk> said to walk.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: yes His people.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: His people.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: His people know his.
Tanya Ruttley: And i we got to teach that to our children. We got to get them to understand. It sounds good when when people are out here talking about, well, don't even know if it sounded good. No more, girl, the way they popping up all these numbers and talking crazy about HIV back on the rise because people going to these different places, stateside, overseas.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: have trying to have what they call it fun, but there's risks and complications from that.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: Not even just we're talking about, okay, you got to account for that with God, but we're talking about just right here while you're on earth.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: Why y'all are you saying?
Tanya Ruttley: That's the wrong way.
Kim Fletcher: I try to say if you read them, if we read more, we perish for the lack of knowledge.
Tanya Ruttley: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: Mm-hmm. Right.
Kim Fletcher: So if we read more in in the Bible and see what he say as, you know, nowhere in the Bible, he says, I come that you may have a bad life everywhere in the Bible.
Tanya Ruttley: Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: It says he wants you to have a good life. good life he come to have a good life a good life a good life so that means on this earth he wants us to have a good life he came that we may have a good life he jesus came so we could get what god planned for us in the beginning the beginning was everything
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: Yes, ma'am.
Tanya Ruttley: Yep.
Tanya Ruttley: Yep. From the beginning. And so it's like, Let's practice what we're preaching. Let's talk to these young adults, middle-aged adults, older adults. Let's just stay on repeat about if you, if what we've been doing, which is the world away ain't working.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-mm. Right. Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: What we just gave God's way a try? Just, just start to turn the tables a little bit. Start looking at the men in a different light and understand them start looking at themselves in a different light.
Kim Fletcher: no that that's why i said um last night or night before last should we step up in a different way you know so should we step up meaning should we let our light shine like lord said let our light shine we don't have to tell anyone just let it shine and they'll see him through us with our light shining and so should we be stepping up in a different way in our relationship with our men letting our light shine so that they want
Tanya Ruttley: Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: to seek, they want their light to shine as well as ours. The same way we sh we're shining, they would want to shine.
Tanya Ruttley: Right. I think that communicating it is good because sometimes some people don't want to ask questions. Right. Everybody's not comfortable ask a question. So like in my household.
Tanya Ruttley: Right. So i'll so i'll I'll say mine and speak personally. I talk about it. um So let me let me say this. I, what you call it? Um, I play the Bible gateway that plays on my phone.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: So people hear it. It's on my TV, YouTube. I listen to, um, different videos, right? Where people are talking about, God's way of living with a marriage as an individual.
Tanya Ruttley: Right. um And then I also have books.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: So for me, I think it's both. They need to see you walking in that.
Kim Fletcher: Right.
Tanya Ruttley: They need to hear it. They need to see consistency.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: Oh, I'll tell you something is it kind of got me a little bit. My husband today, we was. doing something with a business girl. And he was in the car and he was just like, I'm start listening him. who talking about, Dr. Miles Monroe.
Tanya Ruttley: And he was like, I'm gonna start listening him in the morning.
Kim Fletcher: Okay.
Tanya Ruttley: Girl, I was a little shook. I was like, oh, okay.
Kim Fletcher: And because he, he got.
Tanya Ruttley: Okay. You know, ain't say much, you know. Now my husband and already believed in God. So that's that's that's not an issue, but it's now the practicing saying, well, I'm gonna add this into my daily, right?
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: um And that's why I think
Kim Fletcher: and because he he got
Tanya Ruttley: We communicate it, but you don't push it. I've never been a pusher. I know people who push.
Kim Fletcher: yeah
Tanya Ruttley: But Dr. Miles Monroe, it's funny how he say, oh, they're so loud.
Kim Fletcher: but God said that. You don't be a hypocrite.
Tanya Ruttley: They're so loud. Oh, you better live through them.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: They're not hearing you. you know And it's like, you know just talk, walk, speak it, and let them see that you're being confused with it.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: God said, don't be a hypocrite. Don't be a hypocrite.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. Absolutely.
Kim Fletcher: You don't make anyone believe in me because they will. He didn't ask you that.
Tanya Ruttley: Absolutely.
Kim Fletcher: He just asked you to spread the good news of the gospel.
Tanya Ruttley: Just spread it. Yeah. You don't got to put them apart.
Kim Fletcher: Just spread good news.
Tanya Ruttley: That's it.
Kim Fletcher: Just the good news.
Tanya Ruttley: That's it.
Kim Fletcher: And and you you are spreading it because
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: the the minister that you're listening to, he's talking good news. Like he's not bashing.
Tanya Ruttley: Absolutely.
Kim Fletcher: He's not saying this against, he's not being biased.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: He's saying it like it is.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: and it's ah And it's hitting your spouse as while you're listening to it. So it's like you are stepping up, you are stepping up with material that he wants to hear.
Tanya Ruttley: Right. Yeah, absolutely.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: And I, and I think that, um, one of the things that I think, you know, I try to ensure I'm not doing is pushing.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: I was just walking in my walk, working on me. Right. Um, I've always had, I think a pretty good, decent heart. Right. But, you know, make mistakes here and there. um but I've always had good intentions or even when, you know, honestly, even when I've done wrong,
Tanya Ruttley: I was always convicted in it. i I don't recall doing wrong and ever feeling like, whoo-hoo, yep. Uh-uh. Uh-uh. When I've done wrong, man, mean, sitting in it bad. And so it's like...
Tanya Ruttley: So how do I deepen my relationship with god to help push me in the right direction so that through my wrongdoing, my bloodline does not create the same wrongdoing. Not that they're going to be perfect, but that my bloodline, those who I know continue to evolve, right?
Tanya Ruttley: The world gets better. we start to slowly change how those see marriage because God's way and how he see marriage is totally different from what the world sees.
Tanya Ruttley: And so I just want us to get away from the worldly way of this and follow God's way and just see what happens. And I want to start with my own inside my own home and see what that is going to look like.
Tanya Ruttley: You know what i mean? Exactly.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah, you you have to let the Holy Spirit, because that's why Jesus needed the Holy Spirit. He knew we needed Holy Spirit, so he left the Holy Spirit for us to lead and guide to teach us all things.
Tanya Ruttley: Absolutely. Yep. ah here
Kim Fletcher: So he we have to let the Holy Spirit teach us the things that we need to know to help our spouse or whoever.
Tanya Ruttley: Yep.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah, absolutely.
Kim Fletcher: Okay.
Tanya Ruttley: And you get that, guys, for those of you wondering, the Holy Spirit, what is she talking about? That's you learning the word of God. And when you learn that, when you, the Holy Spirit will come to you, he will convict you.
Kim Fletcher: Are
Tanya Ruttley: The Holy Spirit will convict you based on, you know, you're doing some stuff you ain't supposed to be doing. um
Kim Fletcher: you teaching?
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah, teaching you.
Kim Fletcher: let you know.
Tanya Ruttley: So you got to read that word. And that's why God tells us to do that. And I'm just so glad that I am so still here. And I have an opportunity to practice what I preach to actually get in here and study, listen to it, feed my spirit, feed my soul, what I'm so supposed to take in.
Kim Fletcher: Okay. and
Tanya Ruttley: Because, you know, what we take in is going to come out. you You better believe it. So if you're out here listening to stuff about shooting somebody, being loose, because you're a woman now, you think you get to go out here and just sleep around. It's your body.
Tanya Ruttley: You can be sexually provocative because you want to.
Tanya Ruttley: Be careful what you're taking in.
Kim Fletcher: Not if you're in a kingdom.
Tanya Ruttley: It's going to have you out here living the wrong way.
Kim Fletcher: Not if you are in the kingdom, if you're following God.
Tanya Ruttley: That's right. yeah And if you want to start following God, you've got to change that.
Kim Fletcher: Those things.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: You've got to turn that around.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm. Do you have the change of thinking?
Tanya Ruttley: Because, yeah. And so that's also what you have coming in. That's your friends. That's your choices of how they live their life.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: Because what's coming into you is going to come out of you in some form or fashion.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: And so we've got to correct that by studying. oh And if you guys want to reach out to Kim and I on the side and be like, yeah. Hey, how do I get started? You know, do you know how I can start reading or where to begin?
Tanya Ruttley: You can always hit us up privately, you know, in our in our messages on either channel that we have. um And we have no problem, you know, talking to you telling you how to get started, how to change this thing around.
Tanya Ruttley: And ahead.
Kim Fletcher: get take take a thought take a thought and just say google give me all the scriptures on what i need to do to get whatever and google will give you those scriptures you could just start from there you start from there like let the holy spirit lead you it's
Tanya Ruttley: But I think you also need a good teacher. yeah I think you we also, because I will say this, let me let me be vulnerable here again.
Kim Fletcher: yeah
Tanya Ruttley: and Because again, as you guys know, I always say, yeah, because just Googling it, unfortunately I feel, and that's why I just jumped in to say about the teacher thing.
Kim Fletcher: Go ahead. You have to have teachers. Yeah, you have to have teachers.
Tanya Ruttley: So you I've heard some of this stuff that I'm hearing now,
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: It's how it's taught, right?
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: um
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: And the reason why I was saying how I listen to, um you know, who I listen to.
Kim Fletcher: But you need to read for yourself, too.
Tanya Ruttley: yeah No, no, no. That's not what saying. Let finish. So I've always read the Bible.
Kim Fletcher: Uh-huh. Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: to read the whole Bible more than one time, right?
Kim Fletcher: What does that
Tanya Ruttley: I've even went and studied. There are just certain teachers, and I say this even with when you have a coach or you have a certain teacher in school. There are certain people that can just get through.
Kim Fletcher: mean? Cut it.
Tanya Ruttley: You can go in here and look up a scripture and you can start reading. Girl, I say reading.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: Y'all, excuse me. I'm from Georgia.
Kim Fletcher: what does that mean
Tanya Ruttley: stop You know, they try to talk about us. I'm being funny. One of my friends be like, you know, you graduated from boop, boop.
Kim Fletcher: yeah
Tanya Ruttley: I'm like, wait minute, girl. You graduated with me now. But hold on.
Kim Fletcher: Okay.
Tanya Ruttley: But, um you know, definitely. Yeah, you can start reading. But. Look for a teacher.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah, just a thought on your...
Tanya Ruttley: Look for someone who can teach it and break it down to where it makes sense.
Kim Fletcher: That's right.
Tanya Ruttley: Because I remember my dad started doing the Bible study in the home. And he was teaching. And I'm going to tell you, um was asking some deep questions. And we're older now.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: So but him and I talked about, he was like, you know, you asked me some stuff I had no answer to. You see what I'm saying? And so it, yeah and I think it just made him, ah he put doubt in me, right.
Kim Fletcher: man
Kim Fletcher: man
Tanya Ruttley: Because he didn't know how to answer. So I also think teaching is important, but who you're getting it from, who can actually break it down, um, for you to where
Kim Fletcher: and you don't want to go jump from you don't want to jump from this church to that church or this pastor to this pastor because you're gonna you're getting different things and get different teachings and Now you're confused. So you want to find you one that you know is going to, it's the kingdom living.
Tanya Ruttley: So I don't know about the not going from one to the next because you can go to one.
Kim Fletcher: have.
Tanya Ruttley: been to somebody church before, and let me tell you, I did.
Kim Fletcher: ah yeah you get it
Tanya Ruttley: walked in.
Kim Fletcher: ah have
Tanya Ruttley: They got to, look, I walked in, and I did exactly what God said. I left and I didn't return.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah, that's what I said. You can't go from church to church.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: You can't do all that because I used to do, well, I didn't used to do it, but I used to listen, listen.
Tanya Ruttley: But until you find the right one, you may end up at church to church.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah, you, you, yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: So that's what I'm saying. I don't know.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah, you got sign.
Tanya Ruttley: You got to find the right one. And I don't think you stay there because you just went, no.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah, you got a sign. yeah you
Tanya Ruttley: you put
Kim Fletcher: You got to find that you really, i have I have a minister that I've been with ever since my kids was little.
Tanya Ruttley: And then, yeah.
Kim Fletcher: I learned, I grew with him. I learned with him. He made mistakes. He came out and said he made mistakes, learned from the mistakes, taught us what we know. And I'm doing just fine.
Tanya Ruttley: Right.
Kim Fletcher: Living in kingdom because learned it.
Tanya Ruttley: Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: The word says you imitate your leader, your spiritual leader. And I imitate my spiritual leader and I'm doing just fine.
Tanya Ruttley: gotcha.
Kim Fletcher: that would The word says when you find a spiritual leader, you you imitate that spiritual leader because that spiritual leader is watching over your hip and you watch over your soul, helping you to go on through life.
Tanya Ruttley: i got
Kim Fletcher: you you You imitate that spiritual leader. If that spiritual leader is doing what the kingdom say do, you imitate.
Tanya Ruttley: Right. And teaching you so that you can pass that down too.
Kim Fletcher: Yes.
Tanya Ruttley: because you you know and And that was the thing with me.
Kim Fletcher: That's right.
Tanya Ruttley: i don't I don't want to get the information and keep it to myself, which is why Kim and I are on this podcast, right? um We want to spread this good Because if they can come in and convict us and help us get our life together, um we know it can happen for others and we can change this around for our community, you know.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: and
Tanya Ruttley: And that is the big thing that we always talk about because we're we're starting with our own family. It's going to look the way that God says it's supposed to look. We're not out here trying to um tell you guys one thing and we're living and doing a totally different thing. That's we we want to save y'all from that, you know?
Tanya Ruttley: So yeah, like she's saying, you know, she got the person that she follows. I have the the person, you know, that I'm listening to because I have listened to some pastors and they weren't teaching. They were preaching. They weren't teaching.
Kim Fletcher: Right. take
Tanya Ruttley: So it was regurgitate.
Kim Fletcher: And preach.
Tanya Ruttley: They were regurgitating information and the people in the congregation, it shows that Yeah, they go to church. Yeah, they listen. They go even go to do Bible study. But their life was not showing it.
Tanya Ruttley: And I know some of them, and it wasn't.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: and so And that should have been a sign, but because it was what I was used to, I just left it at that.
Kim Fletcher: know.
Tanya Ruttley: you know But that's that's a big sign. When they're up there, they're preaching. And some may even be doing some teaching.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: But the ones that's following them, where's their life at?
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: That's right.
Tanya Ruttley: Because it you got children, you got a spouse, it should start to reflect.
Kim Fletcher: always say...
Tanya Ruttley: And if it ain't reflecting, something's off.
Kim Fletcher: And...
Kim Fletcher: And I always say, if you go, if you're listening to a pastor just on Sundays, even if you're just listening on Sundays and you don't have anything to carry with you through the week, wrong pastor.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: You're listening to the wrong, but because whatever you're listening to and whatever you're reading, it should carry you over day by day.
Tanya Ruttley: Well, it should help you hopefully to get in there and study so that, yeah, you have something.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah, renewing other minds. You have to renew your mind each day.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: That's why I say day by day, because if you're renewing your mind, and it's not like people think you got to carry the Bible, you got to do this.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: No, you do not.
Tanya Ruttley: No.
Kim Fletcher: I feel like you if you are studying, you know, the Bible, it should be just like a computer.
Tanya Ruttley: Mm-mm.
Kim Fletcher: If I come to you and ask you something, you should be able to tell me it should just come out of you. come out of you because it's in you.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: It should just automatically come out of you because you've studied, you've cooked it, you've baked it, you know it works.
Tanya Ruttley: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: Yep.
Kim Fletcher: It should just come out. You researched, you whatever. Just like a computer. If I type in show me whatever, And it comes up. That's how I should, it should be with us.
Kim Fletcher: You should be able to say, Kim, what does God think about what ah fornication or whatever?
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: It should come up.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: What, what should I do? It should come up automatically because I've studied, I know.
Tanya Ruttley: Mm-hmm. Absolutely. Yep.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah. So if you practice those things, I think you'll start to see d things differently and you will change your mind. your mind Because the word will make you change your mind.
Tanya Ruttley: you
Kim Fletcher: Because the word...
Tanya Ruttley: it will convict you honey yes and the good thing is don't beat yourself up um in learning these things and understanding like oh well i've already been you know none of us are perfect but once you get that word in you you start making those changes you know and and it And it may be for at first a slow change because I even think when it comes to this changing of our family dynamics that we're talking about here, I think it's going to be a change.
Tanya Ruttley: I think it may even be a challenge to the change. And it'll be slow.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: But I don't care how slow it is as long as we start turning the wheel for our community.
Kim Fletcher: That's right.
Tanya Ruttley: It's okay to have this conversation with these young adults about the way God says we should live.
Kim Fletcher: hey
Tanya Ruttley: Some of them may act like they're not listening.
Kim Fletcher: That's right.
Tanya Ruttley: They may even seem offended. Talk with love. Don't beat them up. Let them get by themselves and think, you know, um,
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: And not see us as a hypocrite. If you are out there and you are already walking in God's word on the outside, when you're out with people, make sure you're doing it privately.
Tanya Ruttley: so that there's no hypocrisy in your life when you're speaking to these people and trying to help them because this is about our community.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Kim Fletcher: That's right.
Tanya Ruttley: This isn't just about Kim and Latrice. This is about all of us changing this stuff so that even when we're no longer here, all of our bloodlines will be a continuation from what we've started in the process of getting back to the way God said this is supposed to be.
Kim Fletcher: And know it's only one perfect.
Tanya Ruttley: That's it.
Kim Fletcher: You will never be perfect.
Tanya Ruttley: You will never be perfect.
Kim Fletcher: so So don't even try to be perfect.
Tanya Ruttley: Yep.
Kim Fletcher: If you make a mistake, you repent, change your mind. Repent means change your mind, change your way of thinking, change it, pick yourself up and go.
Tanya Ruttley: Right. Keep striving.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: Yes.
Tanya Ruttley: So, yeah, I wanted to talk on this one because i was like, ooh, because, you know, I talk to my sons. You know, I'm one of those mothers. I'm i'm not shy to talk about sex. I never was. um
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Tanya Ruttley: And so even when ah I do my daughter, too, sometimes I was like crack jokes about it. But, you know, I was always honest with them when we started having those conversations because I remember my first one, I started talking to him. And I was thinking, ooh, I might be talking to him too early, right?
Tanya Ruttley: Girl. He was like, oh, mama, I heard that before at school. I was like, wait minute, what? And I was talking to him like in fourth grade.
Kim Fletcher: Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: yeah
Tanya Ruttley: He had already had girls trying to kiss him like two years before.
Kim Fletcher: My son, my son, yes, in elementary, in very off the third, fourth grade, getting money for little girls and jewelry.
Tanya Ruttley: And I'm like, what?
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. yeah yeah Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: I'm taking it back up to the school because I'm like, where your mother?
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. Yeah.
Kim Fletcher: And why are you giving this little boy money?
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. And that's why saying it has to be in these homes. We, we as men and women have got to understand this is not just about us.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm. Okay.
Tanya Ruttley: This is not just about what you want at the moment. We have got to think about these little ones that we are bringing into this world. And in order to think about them, we have got to be right ourselves first.
Tanya Ruttley: And again, that's why we're saying we've got to get in here and start understanding, reading God's word to get that understanding, knowledge, and wisdom. We've got to.
Kim Fletcher: And we have to get it into them we have to get it into them now because like we just said, our kids in elementary thinking about sexual behaviors.
Tanya Ruttley: We've got to.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. Yeah. So either parents are absent in that home.
Kim Fletcher: So we...
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: Well, they there have to be some type of absence inside of the home or when they're going somewhere else, the adults that are in that home are absent.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: Someone is absent somewhere wear in order for that to happen.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: And it's not putting.
Kim Fletcher: Or... TV.
Tanya Ruttley: Go ahead.
Kim Fletcher: TV, too, as well.
Tanya Ruttley: That's why it would be absent, right?
Kim Fletcher: The TV.
Tanya Ruttley: Not paying attention to what they're watching, right?
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: um And that's what i'm saying is either in your home where someone is absent or it's in ah someone else's home where they go where someone is absent or at the school and they're just playing out on the playground.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: No one's, really you know, teachers, kids are out on the playground. So I get that part. um
Kim Fletcher: Right.
Tanya Ruttley: So, and but those kids where your child don't know when they're learning it from school, that means it's coming from another kid that's learning it from their home or somebody else's home. You see what I'm saying? So that's why think
Kim Fletcher: yeah you know you can learn it you know you can learn it from home look at good times what uh the jada jackson was beating a little dog you rotten little kid because the mom was doing her like that so you know everything come from home yeah did you remember that part did you ever watch good times you remember when yeah the home yeah mm-hmm
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. Yeah. That's why said it's going to be in the home. It's going to be at somebody else's home or it's going that playground. But even if it's on the playground for your particular child, it was learned inside of someone else's home, which is still where a parent it is.
Kim Fletcher: That's right. It was learning at home.
Tanya Ruttley: It could be a grandparent. It could be a but somebody.
Kim Fletcher: Mm-hmm.
Tanya Ruttley: Right. And I just think we've got to think of God first.
Kim Fletcher: That's right.
Tanya Ruttley: What does he want? And if we go from there, it can start to get better. it can start to get better.
Kim Fletcher: That's right.
Tanya Ruttley: Because you men, I just pray that you guys can start to understand what you represent.
Kim Fletcher: And put...
Kim Fletcher: yeah
Tanya Ruttley: I really do. And I will stick by and my understanding and learning God created. we are but We are both man. we We are. We get that human. We're man. But male, female.
Tanya Ruttley: You were created first and there's a reason. I'm studying that. I'm trying to get into that. And i pray that this can turn around by you guys understanding who you are, what you represent and putting us as a community where we belong under God's kingdom.
Tanya Ruttley: Right here on earth. We don't gotta to wait till we leave here and get to heaven. As they say, you know, heaven, when I get to heaven, you know, let me stop.
Kim Fletcher: normal
Tanya Ruttley: But we want that.
Kim Fletcher: you ought to want to be in heaven on earth
Tanya Ruttley: I want that life here. Yeah. I want that life here.
Kim Fletcher: your yes heaven on earth I strive for it every day when I go to bed when I wake up and I be like thank you Lord had another day on your green earth thank you thank you okay so
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah. yeah Girl. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. All righty, you guys. Well, we have made our 30 minutes. Latrice was late today because of her computer being on mute.
Tanya Ruttley: But I definitely thank you guys for joining us.
Kim Fletcher: Okay.
Tanya Ruttley: There we go again, TikTok. But I thank you guys for joining us um on our day of our thirty day journey We will definitely see y'all.
Kim Fletcher: Yay.
Tanya Ruttley: We will see you guys again tomorrow at 8 p.m. on all the channels.
Kim Fletcher: Thank you. Thank you.
Tanya Ruttley: All the channels. And again, if you guys want to reach out to Kim and I, you can definitely always send us a message. We are here. um And you young ladies, please hear us out. We are not going to be bashing you. We just want to turn this thing around.
Tanya Ruttley: We want to turn it.
Kim Fletcher: And we just want to hear your feelings. let's let's talk it let's hear Let's talk to each other and hear each other and lift each other up. That's all we want to do.
Tanya Ruttley: Well, I don't want to just lift you, honey. I want you to get on God's side. Let me say that.
Kim Fletcher: Well, that's the same thing.
Tanya Ruttley: Look, you can be lifted in the world a worldly way.
Kim Fletcher: and if yeah
Tanya Ruttley: Let me.
Kim Fletcher: yeah no that we Well, we're not talking about it in a way
Tanya Ruttley: I don't want to just lift your spirit because somebody might be lifted by, you know, Jezebel's spirit. I don't want to do that. But yeah, so I know what you're saying, though.
Kim Fletcher: the way. Yeah, well, yeah, you you you get what I'm saying.
Tanya Ruttley: Yeah, I do. You know, got to throw in something make me laugh. All right, you guys. We love you guys. We will see you tomorrow at 8 p.m. Eastern Standard Time from Startup to Takeover.
Kim Fletcher: Watch us work.
Tanya Ruttley: Kimberly Latrice out. Good night.
Kim Fletcher: Good night.
