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NTK314 - 30,000 Feet of Annoyance
60 Plays2 years ago
TK tells Noodle all about his issues in a desolate town and flights across the world.
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Transcript
Podcast Intro and New Outro
00:00:02
Speaker
You're listening to the CheapShots Podcast Network.
00:00:37
Speaker
Taco Bell. Taco Bell. I wonder how many people skip that intro. They're just like, nope. It's the best part of our podcast. That's what they listen to and then they turn it off. It still counts as a listen.
00:00:55
Speaker
That's that's our only legitimacy is that intro And our new outro that we're gonna yeah showcase excited for that.
MGK's Album Win Controversy
00:01:07
Speaker
Yeah I was gonna play some like some like Aloha music or something when I got in here, but I that would have been you would been I
00:01:22
Speaker
pissed and it would have been a horrible podcast. So how's Hawaii? Good idea. And you can't help yourself. It's all right. It's warm. I can't. Uh, it's warm. Congratulations in order, by the way. And, and us and a sadness. Kind of like the chief scam you just watched. Yeah. I knew it was going to happen. What's the congratulations?
00:01:48
Speaker
Well, it's kind of a congratulations. It was it surprised me, but it won't surprise you because. You are who you are, but MGK just beat out another band for Album of the Year. Uh. First of all, MGK got Album of the Year. Yep. MGK got Album of the Year for what? For whatever his fucking gay ass album is.
00:02:18
Speaker
I'm going to, I mean, I'm going to guess he probably beat out Taylor Swift. Ghost. Oh, really? Ghost was, uh, they were in the finals. You got super gay with your voice. That's awesome. That makes me sad. That just shows it was the most homosexual album of the year is what they were going for. And MGK is the winner of that? Yep. Barely. When did this happen?
00:02:46
Speaker
I don't know, I just got told, I have no idea. Who told you? The other weirdos in my life. Right, because were they shocked that Ghost was in the running? Yeah, I got WTF and large letters and exclamation points. And then I said, are you sure it wasn't for Gayas album of the year? And they told me to shut up.
00:03:14
Speaker
I cannot believe MGK got album of like, what? But you can, but you can believe Ghost was up there for the running. Of course. They're a legitimate band. They're both terrible. Ghost is legitimately good. First of all, if you like Blink-182, which you do and your wife does, you like MGK. It's exactly that. I don't know. I don't, I mean, I think it's a little different. It's Blink-182 with MGK. I don't think that's what it is. You haven't listened to anything.
00:03:43
Speaker
I don't, I don't, I will listen to it and then tell me that I'm wrong. But what, okay. This is going against like Taylor Swift and. Taylor Swift's album wasn't out yet for the year for it to be, she'll probably win next year. Um, holy shit, bro. Wow. My mind too. I'm sure it's Facebook news. It might not be true. Oh, it's probably some like.
00:04:12
Speaker
Ghost probably wrote it. Yeah, yeah. Ghost website that no one even has heard of. Yeah, Ghost probably wrote that themselves. No, they would have won. No, they wrote it themselves because people wouldn't believe it and they're like, what's put it out there? And people search MGK and they'll find us and like, well, it's trending through all these Facebook posts. Boom. Everybody knows Ghost now. If they did that, it's genius.
The Band Ghost and Their Fanbase
00:04:35
Speaker
First of all, a lot of people know who Ghost is. You're one of the few who had never heard of him. I had heard of them.
00:04:41
Speaker
Just didn't know they suck so bad. I listened to a podcast today. They were critiquing the band Ghost and all their albums. Jesus Christ, man, you're just looking up Ghost podcasts. Well, no, they do tons of bands, but they just happened to do Ghost on one episode.
00:05:09
Speaker
It was good. I bet it was awesome. One of the podcasters is like, this is my, uh,
00:05:21
Speaker
He's like, this album's my favorite album. It's what got me to get my ghost tattoo. And the other guy's like, you got a ghost tattoo? I didn't know that. How cool are those guys? Do you feel like they're pretty cool guys? I mean, they could be. I have no idea. Do they feel like cool guys when you listen to them? One of them was cool. Was it the guy that liked ghosts? The guy who didn't have the ghost tattoo. Exactly.
00:05:49
Speaker
You know what I look at? People that like ghosts are simps. That's what I think. I mean, you can have your opinion. It's allowed. It's allowed so far. Okay. Until, until it's not. Simps. And then you will be, you will be destroyed. Simps that want to feel edgy. Is that what it is? Kind of. I'm not saying you are. You're a little outside of that, but for the most part, yes. They're like, this is what girls like.
00:06:17
Speaker
Oh, it's weird that girls would like ghost. It's because they want to be edgy. Like, uh, like emo chicks. They make Satanism accessible for everyone. Yes. Cause it's pop music.
00:06:39
Speaker
It is. It is pop music. I will agree. Well, it's not pop in the fact. I mean, it's not popular, but it's it's it's pop music. That's what it is. It is popular. You can't be pop music and be hard heavy metal. They're not heavy metal. You told me they were. I don't want to make this another ghost podcast. I'm sorry. I brought it up. OK. All I'm saying, all I'm saying is they've won metal awards.
00:07:05
Speaker
Who cares? Metal Album of the Year. I'm not saying
MGK's Movie 'Good Morning' and Persona Critique
00:07:08
Speaker
they're heavy metal. That's just what they were, what award they won. I'd like to see, I'm going to try to look up some of those videos of people reacting to them to listen to metal. But you know, you're, you're ghost people on the same line as MGK. Well, that's great. MGK is the number one guy in the world. You love MGK. You think his music is good.
00:07:34
Speaker
I don't have anything. You are the one who has a hatred for MGK, like a bitter hatred. Yeah. I tried to watch his movie, The Good Morning, and it's just for girls who want to fuck MGK. I didn't know he had a movie called The Good Morning. It's some comedy and immediately it shows him basically naked and it shows his ass and then it shows him look at his own dick talking about shrinkage. I'm like, I got to turn this off. I've never even heard of this movie. I don't know. It was on the plane. Oh, wow.
00:08:04
Speaker
I watched literally less than 10 minutes and I saw him naked. Have the roommates seen that movie yet? They're gonna. I'm going to go home and it's just going to be like a fucking Starburst commercial with liquid juices in the house. First of all, they have an unhealthy love for MGK for some reason. They want to fuck, dude. It's not that he's good. They like how he looks.
00:08:33
Speaker
He narrates in this movie too, so it's horrible, dude. It doesn't sound good. He was good in the dirt. I will give him that. You can tell that he's trying to blow himself in the movie. It's insane. And it could be my hatred. It fueled your hatred? It could be my hatred that made it seem like it's super terrible, but it's pretty terrible. Hold on, I got to adjust my air conditioning. It's fucking warm.
00:08:57
Speaker
You could talk about ghosts or whatever you want to do. His dick, or his back, or his abs, or his asshole. You know a lot more about MGK. You're watching his movies. I've only seen the dirt, and that's not an MGK movie. It's funny. I know. The trailer seemed like it was kind of funny. So I was like, let me just try it. Maybe I can get past it. And it made it worse. Hold on.
00:09:21
Speaker
Who's, who else is in it? Like any, who's the female character, I guess, who's the, would be the star. I'm guessing. Sorry. Yeah, you're good. Take my clothes off. Yeah. Who's the female? Who's the female protagonist? Oh, I have no Megan Fox is in it. It showed her name. Oh God. Really? Yeah. Oh, why would, why is that so obvious? You said it was a comedy.
00:09:51
Speaker
Just because like, I'm sure they're like, MGK, you want to be part of this? Like, yeah, I need my baby girl in this. She's a really great actress. I don't know. Have you ever seen Transformers? Yeah. And it said, good morning. This is how, this is how he knows his fans are retarded. Retards. Retards. Tardos. Tardos. Tardos Maximus. Agreed.
00:10:18
Speaker
In the beginning, he gets a text says, good morning, blah, blah, blah. And it's spelled M O U R N I N G. Like morning, like I'm sad. Yeah. Like basically saying, like, I think he was getting dumped. I didn't get very far into the movie to find out, but basically it said that.
Taylor Swift and Kanye West
00:10:37
Speaker
And he's like, I wonder why she spelled it like that. And then he looked up what morning meant. And then he was like, uh,
00:10:46
Speaker
Oh, even then he was like, I don't, why would you, what does this mean? So I'm saying his fans are so dumb. They had to look it up on purpose so they could explain why, what morning meant. Oh yeah. Well, that's not just, that's probably every, uh, someone under 20. Okay.
00:11:05
Speaker
So that irritated me. I wanted it. I tried to get through it. I was like, all right, maybe I'm being unfair. He didn't really try. Well, if you're not a fan and you think that people like him just because they want to fuck and really don't give a fuck about his music, separate his pandering towards chicks. And he was playing his music in the intro and he said something about being sad. I'm like, you're not fucking sad, dude. You have millions and millions of dollars. Everybody wants to smash you. I've never seen you not smile.
00:11:32
Speaker
Did you say there was a documentary about how sad he was? That's what I was told. Yes. He was going to kill himself. He had a shotgun in his mouth. And we stopped him. Somebody wrote this storyline for him. Like, this is what you need to do. But it was playing his music and he was like, oh, sad, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, all right, you got past the music. You're OK. This is going to be the unsufferable, but you can handle it. And when he's naked before the movie even begins, I'm like, I'm done. Oh, that's when you were done. So you didn't get through 10 minutes. Like, they put him in the shower.
00:12:03
Speaker
First of all, he gets up just in boxers, scratches his nuts, walks off to the shower, shows him buck-ass naked from the back, and then it pans up the front of his body, and he's got a washcloth over his dick, and he's naked completely. What's the purpose of the washcloth? To cover his dick. From the camera that's not there, because he doesn't know it's being filmed. I don't get it. It's not a documentary, it's just a...
00:12:33
Speaker
Right. But like, what's the perfect, like, why would he have a, was he washing his dick? No, he's just holding it over it just so they could show the girls what's up. Now I will say he had a cool invention. Basically like he hit a button and like basically it filled up his shower with weed while he was showering in it. That was pretty dope. What do you mean it filled the shower with weed? Like smoke. Oh, that'd be pretty cool. I mean, then your whole body smells like weed though.
00:13:03
Speaker
I've lived that way for years. I had to get through that because it was bothering me. We're welcome on Ghost being way up higher than they should. Right. That shocked you more than anything. It shocked you more than MGK. Yeah, I assume he's supposed to win, just like Taylor Swift is supposed to win. Do you love Taylor Swift music? I hate Taylor Swift. She has a couple of good songs, I will admit, but I don't like her. Surprised you don't like it.
00:13:32
Speaker
I don't like all of her music. She also likes to seem sad. Yeah. Well, she talks about how like all her ex-boyfriend, she has a lot of ex-boyfriends, which means she's probably a fucking psycho. Yeah. Well, that and they're in a different kind of world. And insufferable. She's very insufferable. Those people are probably banging everybody though. I guess. It wouldn't be terrible.
00:13:59
Speaker
So, yeah, let's talk about. Oh, the dummies wanted to get Taylor Swift concert tickets, too, and they couldn't. How come? Because they're immediately sold out. Oh, yeah, I saw something about that on the news. They were like thousands to get a ticket now, which is who's going to pay that? Some dummy will. It's all about it's so expensive and it's sold out so well because all these moms want to get shit for their daughters. They can't be the ones like.
00:14:27
Speaker
Uh, they're how everybody keeps up with everybody. Like I've taken my daughter to the Taylor Swift counselor. Uh, so they want to keep up. So they have to get these tickets. Right. So they were sold out immediately. Hmm. Okay. So in that theory, I mean, Taylor sort of smash ghosts. Oh yeah. That's why I said like, how, why did Taylor Swift not win? Because she has like everyone said just the greatest album of all time that she just came out with.
00:14:57
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know. How long do you think it's going to be before Kanye gets murdered? Oh, he's not going to get murdered. He's going to come out. He's going to come out with another fucking huge album. Oh, for sure. But he's going to get, well, not even known of them. Put it out. I'm just saying he does something crazy every time right before he makes like before he puts on an album. It's a good idea.
00:15:23
Speaker
Like always, every single time. I like that he said he's going death, Khan. I like Kanye.
Travel Tales from Hawaii to Alaska
00:15:35
Speaker
Because he's a fucking psycho. Well, you like him. You didn't like him before you wore a MAGA hat, probably. Yeah, I did. Sure. Like when he went up to the stage and like ripped the award out of fucking Taylor Swift. He didn't like it at the time. You probably like, fuck that guy. That was awesome. Come on.
00:15:52
Speaker
Okay. I don't trust your, I don't feel you're being honest. Oh, did you always hate him? No, I don't hate him now. Oh, okay. But I do think he'll be murdered. I don't think so. The Jews don't murder people. All right, man. The Jews are the ones that get murdered. Are you a denier? No, they probably got murdered. The Holocaust denier.
00:16:21
Speaker
I've never heard anybody say they got murdered by the Nazis before. You've never heard that? No, you ever heard anybody say, Hey, I was murdered by the Nazis? Never. No, you said you've never heard anyone say the Jews have been murdered by the Nazis. No, I said, I've never heard anybody that says I've been murdered by Nazis before. So, I mean, it's all third-hand accounts, second-hand accounts. So you are a denier? No, not at all. Let's talk about that. I believe it. Well, it's okay to be, I mean, if that's what you really believe.
00:16:51
Speaker
Oh, if I did, I would tell you, dude, I don't hold anything back on here. I know. I'm just saying, do you think, uh, it's the real number is 7 million. You think it's a little less than that? Maybe. Well, it's probably legit because they can't like, they kept track so well. They're fucking barcode and these dudes. Yeah. I mean, even if it's such good records that it probably is seven, whatever they looked up, like, Oh, that has a lot of them.
00:17:15
Speaker
Well, like, even if it's not who gives a fuck, like 7 million, 4 million, 3 million, it's still millions. Anything over a few hundred, pretty rough. Yeah. A few hundred thousand. A few hundred in general. No, I mean, the Clintons have killed a few hundred. True. And they're doing just fine. Hell yeah.
00:17:38
Speaker
I want to talk about where you're at right now because I tried to get around it. I almost did it. I almost did it because this kind of leads into stuff that you do want to talk about. It doesn't really matter where I am. Sure. It kind of does. He's like a name dropper guy. He's in the land of chickens. The land of chickens. Yeah. Did you see any chickens? Not yet. It was dark last night.
00:18:06
Speaker
And you did, you kind of stay, you've been holed up the whole time. Yeah, I didn't go out today. I kind of just relaxed. It was kind of nice. I sound a little, a little porch or patio. TK's in a, in a tropical area. That's all I'm going to say. No, feel free. Name tropical. A tropical paradise. A paradise. Doesn't seem like a paradise. It's pretty nice weather. Yeah, it is a paradise. That's what people, that's why people go there.
00:18:37
Speaker
Mm. That's good. All right. So before this, though, you were in Alaska and Jesus Christ, man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So it's like teeth from you. Holy shit. I don't really like to. Like, it seems like we're trying to brag. Or at least you are. I'm I just try to talk about what's going on. I really don't need to tell you where I am.
00:18:58
Speaker
Okay. Oh, I didn't tell you where I didn't say where you were. I just said before the next episode, we're like, GK just got back from this place from a paradise, a tropical paradise. Um, the chickens look it up. What I'm trying to say is you have a story about, uh, when you were in Alaska.
00:19:21
Speaker
I don't remember which ones I wanted to tell. Oh, yeah, it was your rental car, your hotel, pretty much those two things for sure. I know you fell down when I was talking to you on the phone. That was I have like a I don't know, like a hard bruise on my left arm. I can't believe you're not bruised all the way up and down. So TK was he was on the phone. He was getting into his car.
00:19:49
Speaker
Which was? At the hotel. No name drop this car. A Toyota Yaris. Fucking Dofash ride. With? Two donuts on the front. Two donuts in the front? It was a shit car. I can't believe they could even rent it. Look at you never being cleaned. Alaska, get your shit together. Oh, fuck, it's so funny. They don't even give you a car with tires. They're like, here's some donuts.
00:20:17
Speaker
When you told me that I couldn't help but laugh, it's just so fucking hilarious. It's like I felt like I was in like, you ever see like, um, like shots of Africa where they have like half a car that they're using. They're pulling that half of a car with a goat. Yeah. I mean, yeah, that's like in India and shit.
00:20:40
Speaker
Yeah, that, but I'm saying like, oh, we're like, their huts are made of partially of tires and just whatever they could find. Yes. That's what it felt like. It felt like you were, you were in Mad Max beyond Thunderdome. It was insane. I mean, they gave me a Yaris. I met a crazy lady. The crazy lady gave you the Yaris. She did. She had a mustache. By the way, when I took the car back to give, to get a ride back to the airport, because that's how it works. You got to like get in and she drives you back.
00:21:10
Speaker
Right. Or you'd take the car to her and she drives you to the airport. She was in the same clothes. What were the clothes? Were they memorable? Yeah, one was a gray sweatshirt. No, kind of, but no. One was like a gray sweatshirt. A larger lady, huge titties that kind of touched her belt. Right, big flappies. You could tell she had no brawn. What's that? Big flappies.
00:21:36
Speaker
Yeah. Like she could throw them over her shoulders and hang them there. Um, she, it was a gray sweatshirt that had like a fish on it. And there's some days of whatever they have there.
00:21:51
Speaker
Oh, like a, like a fishing days. I imagine. Yeah. Some festival. And then she had like those, imagine people at Walmart, like purple pajama pants, tight little legs. She had little stick legs for being like, she was only fat. It looked like a tube of toothpaste. Oh, she was squeezed real hard. Yeah. She was squeezed at the bottom and all the goo is on top. Get a mustache. Did she have gray hair? No.
00:22:20
Speaker
Okay. When you say she has a mustache, like was it very pronounced? Very. Where I was like, that's what I was looking at. Right. Like I was trying to look in her, in her eyes and I kept looking at her mustache and I was like, I wonder if she knows.
Eccentric Encounters in Alaska
00:22:36
Speaker
Um, I have the guy who's, uh, I'm working for, um, he's very hard to talk to because he's cross eyed. That's the worst. Oh my God. So I just look at his good eye.
00:22:49
Speaker
How do you know which one it is? It's the one that's looking at me. You should cross your eyes towards him and see what he does. Cause only one eye is crossed. The other one's normal. Right. You should try to go get like a, uh, what the fuck is a contact that has like a wonky eye and just look at him and be like, he'd be like, what's up with your eye? Like, Oh, you can't ask people. People ask you that dude. Like that's rude, dude. Yeah. And just change it each day. Put it in the other eye tomorrow.
00:23:19
Speaker
Oh God. Like a, like a, like a wobbly eye. I wonder if you can get contacts like that, that you could see through easily that gives you wonky eyes just so you can experience it. You shake your head. Cookie monster eyes. Okay. That's what this lady looked like. Cookie monster. Did she have like a, I imagine she had like a fro kind of.
00:23:43
Speaker
Kind of, it was just unkempt hair. Yeah. But not long. Not super long. Kind of like weird Alfred. Kind of. Good call, dude. And um... You can see her in your mind. I transferred the vision. It was so traumatic to me, I pushed it onto you. Did she have a nice soothing voice? She was nice. She just said crazy shit, dude. Like what was some of the shit she would tell you? So, she has a problem with Russians, for one. So she's not Russian?
00:24:13
Speaker
No, they come down and fish, and I guess they're in a cult. It sounded like Russian Amish, but they're not actually from Russia. That's what I kept picturing. Like, how did they get here? She said on a boat. Like, oh shit, they just fucking float across and just cross international waters. There's a river where the place you were at is on a river. Yeah, I know, but there's a bay. You come from the ocean to get there.
00:24:38
Speaker
So, um, she was, she was comparing them to dandelions. She's like, if I see a number from a shout out to Homer, Nebraska, and all your Russians are not Homer, Nebraska, Homer, Alaska, and all your Russians. Is there a Homer, Nebraska?
00:24:56
Speaker
So she said they come from Homer, Alaska. The guys come down, they don't shave their beards. Um, they come down on a boat and the women fly in and they only wear, they don't, and the girls have to cover their hair and they wear prom dresses, which I imagine just dresses. And this lady's like, they're going to a fucking prom. Look at these beautiful dresses. Yeah, I don't know. I didn't ask. I was trying to get the fuck out of there. This is all while I'm trying to fill out my paperwork. She's telling me all of this. First of all, why did she bring up Russians? Well, how did that even get started?
00:25:24
Speaker
I don't even know, dude. I was just like, what's going on? You guys fish a lot around here. I was just trying to like fill out the paperwork bitch so I can leave. So she was like, you know, so I don't even answer calls from Homer anymore. I'm like, I will not rent my car. So then they get drunk. They put as many people as they can in the car. They're rude. And I'm like, well, if you give them a Yaris, they have no choice, like two people and it's full.
00:25:48
Speaker
He gave me yards with flat tires. Yeah. It had a maintenance light and a tire light. I got it. I brought it back to him. Like these lights have been on since I had them. She's like, yeah, it's like a Christmas tree. I'm like, OK. Yeah. I would have been like, you might want to put some real tires on here sometime. Yeah. She's like, no, the Russians keep stealing them. So.
00:26:12
Speaker
She said that they're like, she's like, you know, it's like a dandelion and a dandelion comes up in a field and it looks around and it's like, it's real pretty here. And then it thinks, hmm. And all of a sudden next year when it grows back with more dandelions, like, all right, dude, like that sounds like, that's what it probably sounded like when people talked about blacks back in the day.
00:26:36
Speaker
A lot of dandelions in his neighborhood. So she told me that, um, she told me there's a free store downtown, which I think she was trying to get me to get arrested. You think so? She had the hots for you. She wanted you to stay. Maybe. So she's like, there's a store downtown called the free store. You just go down there and if you see something you like, you just take it. I'm like, I'm not sure how that's true, man. How would you pay your lease or your electricity or anything?
00:27:05
Speaker
Maybe it's run by the city. Maybe. She's like, I get stuff down there all the time. Like, oh, OK. Yeah. I did not go to the free store. I should have. I didn't even know they had a free. So I drove around that town and I was just like looking for food. And I'm like, I guess they don't have food here. They definitely don't. It was I got one gallon of water. I want to get a six pack of soda or Coke.
00:27:31
Speaker
They didn't have that, so I got like an eight pack of those little tiny, they're not 20 ounce bottles, they're like 12 ounce bottles. An eight pack of those. A bag of Doritos, $33. Yeah. I spent like $150 there for like probably $50 worth of food. Yeah, it's insane. And I looked up pizza. There's a place that had pizza, but it was $45 for like a large
00:28:06
Speaker
So that's a little outrageous. The one that you said, I mean, if it's great pizza, pizza can be kind of expensive if you go to like a really nice pizza place. Yeah. And then the burgers in the hotel were literally, if you want burgers or fries and a drink, it was $33. Now that's crazy. Yeah. Burger's pretty good.
00:28:29
Speaker
Yeah. Was it like a, like a cafeteria burger? No, it was a pretty healthy burger. It was all right. Yeah. I mean, kind of, but it was like a restaurant style burger. So this lady, so she did that to him about the Russians and how she doesn't, she told me about her sister. She was going to send her canned moose as a present and told her that sounded gross. And then she was probably shocked when he said that. She was kind of offended. She goes, it's not gross. Like she said it like it's not gross.
00:28:57
Speaker
It sounds gross, because all I'm thinking is canned from Campbell's, just here's a can of moose. Like I said in the previous podcast, the TikTok where the guy pours out a can of chicken and it's just a whole chicken falls out of a can and it's fucking soupy and just fucking disgusting. He took a bite of it and threw up.
00:29:20
Speaker
That's like canned moose. That's what I thought too. She said she jars it herself or whatever. I'm like, Oh, it sounds worse. And then she's like, I can, I said, man, I heard it's super expensive here. Cause I told her about you. And she said, I have a bottle of water if you want it. And I'm like, Oh yeah. And she handed it to me and she goes, yeah, I found that in the car and it got turned in. I'm like, motherfucker. I don't want that. I'm sure it was fine. It wasn't opened, right?
00:29:48
Speaker
I don't think so. I didn't open
Alaskan Travel Challenges
00:29:50
Speaker
it. I just chucked it. And then she asked me if I want, if I liked pepperoni sticks or pepperonis. And I'm like, this bitch is going to show me her titties. Uh, so she's like, do you like pepperoni sticks? And like, uh, after getting that water, I'm like, Oh no, I'm good.
00:30:11
Speaker
Um, otherwise a normal person asked me that. I'm like, sure. So she tried to hand them to me. Yeah. And I'm like, I looked at them and they were open. There was two missing. Right. The rest of them are still there. I know dude. I'm like, I don't want ones. You've been fingering with your mustache fingers. You've been dealing yourself.
00:30:34
Speaker
You got to understand that when you live in a place like that, you don't waste food. She would have gave them to me how to waste them. Yeah, I would have too. I would have went out towards like when I was walking to the car and just threw them across the street. I looked her in the eyes and threw them. Did you eat any food at the facility? Look her in the mustache. Yeah, I had a cheeseburger there. Oh, okay. That wasn't $30. No, that was only like,
00:31:03
Speaker
10, 12 bucks. So that's really the place to eat. I can imagine if I live there, that would be like, you want to go out to dinner, babe? And I would take her to the hospital, like dress up. We're going out to something nice. Not the hospital. Yeah. Yeah. Taking the hospital, put on your fucking scrubs. We're going to go eat. Put on your onesie. Yep. So that was very interesting to me. Yeah. That place is, um,
00:31:28
Speaker
You can't, there's no roads into that place. You can only fly or boat in, ship in. But I don't think there's many ships coming in this time of year. Yeah, I don't know. They get a lot of tourism and fishing. They do, and Russians, apparently. Lots of Russians. A lot of dandelions coming to town.
00:31:54
Speaker
You're going to miss that lady. She's burned in my mind. I'm going to remember her for a long time. You should have gave her your WhatsApp. She has my phone number. Oh, that's true. You wrote it down for her. Maybe I'll still get a whole picture or something. Look at her mouth, a little bit of hair on it. What would you say her age was? Hard to tell, man.
00:32:22
Speaker
I would have said like my age ish, but she said she had a kid my age. Oh, so she said, remember she said that his birthday was like on Halloween. So she was at least 55. At least. Cause that's probably about the earliest you could have had a kid. Yeah. So she said that and she's like, yeah, I had him at home. Like gross.
00:32:47
Speaker
I got a picture just walking around. Even the place that I rented my car at was just filthy and crazy. Was it at the airport? No. They had to come pick me up with a car, which I waited for an hour and a half for that to happen. I couldn't call anybody with my phone because there's no service on our cell phones. It's pretty pathetic. You had to have Eskimo Plus or whatever.
00:33:14
Speaker
It's weird. Yeah. Eagles have to bring you your cell phone service. Like all the, all the people that live there have perfect cell phone service. They have no issues. Some company came in and they're like, we will give you, we'll give you, uh, say it like a native, say it like a native American. We will give you great service. Your radio waves will go as the eagle flies.
00:33:40
Speaker
And then of course the mayor said, how many gigs do you need? Uh, so dude, yeah, it's crazy. You feel like it's, I, we didn't grow up with cell phones, right? You and I know it's weird. It's weird that we didn't, that it feels so disconnected now. Well, that's how addicted we are to our phones. It's not even, it's not even that we're addicted. Like it's.
00:34:11
Speaker
Oh, having not being able to watch videos and stuff. Um, like you panic for a second and you're like, man, fuck it. Who cares? Um, I, at least that's how I was, but not being able to call anyone if there's an emergency is pretty crazy. But that's how it was when we were growing up. You had to get to a cell, like knowing that everyone else could do it. Get a world, but you, you're the only one that can't. Well, it was probably some other people like me in a tribal situation.
00:34:37
Speaker
But in that city, you're like literally the only person that is fucked. Yeah. But when they leave that city, they can't use their phone. So it's fine. That's true. So that happened. And when I was driving, I actually drove out towards the mountains and I stayed on one road because I had no directions.
Hotel Room Spookiness
00:34:56
Speaker
Right. If you turned too many times, you're fucked. Yeah. And then I was thinking, and I don't think there really was any turns really. I mean, it was just, this is the road you have.
00:35:06
Speaker
There's driveways, lots of driveway, little offshoots, like dirt roads and stuff, but I'm not taking that yards on anything other than the concrete. And so like, I was like, if I get trapped out here, I can't call for help. I would have to ride some sort of animal back to safety.
00:35:24
Speaker
You would have found, they would have been like, okay, he didn't come back from that project. And then you'd have, in a couple of years you'd hear from me like, I made it back to civilization. I lived in the wilderness for a year and a half. Or they just find your body like frozen solid. After one day.
00:35:43
Speaker
Like after getting raped by a bear. Yeah. I slipped once and I couldn't get up. So that happened. I'm trying to think of what else with her so we can move forward. Um, I think that's really all with her. Yeah. You, you had to deal with her just twice, right? The second time you dealt with her, you didn't really tell me anything about that. She tried to talk a little bit and I was like, kept looking at my phone because I was like, time, time. Oh, you were in a hurry.
00:36:11
Speaker
I made it. I could, I mean, two hours early at that airport, dude, that airport is like a house. It's, it's right. And they do have TSA though. Yeah. Yeah. Anybody wants to get on the plane, get on the plane. I will tell you, I do like the walking up the little stairs instead of going into a gate that has like the jet way.
00:36:35
Speaker
Yeah. I do like the stairs up to the, to the airplane. It feels like you're rich or famous. Oh. I almost want to turn around a little bit. I'm like, eh, there you go. Like the presidential stairs from Air Force One.
00:36:53
Speaker
Bro, but the bad thing is like they're graded so you don't slip. But if you fall down those stairs, you are a pile of goo at the end because you're just shredded. It's like a cheese grater. Dude, if you fall down those stairs, your clothes would get shredded. You'd be naked at the bottom. Naked and bloody. You look like you had turned into a werewolf and back to a person. Why wouldn't they use those ramp things? What ramp things? Oh, you've had to go.
00:37:22
Speaker
outside the inner planes before, right? They usually have like a ramp that they push up to it and it, you know, and it does the stairs. No, it's a ramp. I've never had a ramp before. It's a ramp that goes up and then it makes a turn, a turn hardcore turn to the right up and then a left up. So you're, you're constantly doing a switchbacks.
00:37:45
Speaker
Yeah. But it's for people in wheelchairs. Yeah. They didn't have that. They're like, you don't belong here. If you're in a wheelchair, you cannot fly. If you're in a wheelchair and they, when you get off, they just launch you off the plane. Or they're just like, okay, we have a solution for you. Let everybody get off. And then they pull the chair, the stairs away. And then they just drop you onto people below that catch you in a fire blanket. That'd be awesome.
00:38:10
Speaker
Um, oh, uh, night number two, was it night two? Oh yeah. I woke up at like three AM, three, four AM. What woke you up? I don't know. Um, I don't know if it woke me up or if I just, it was doing that for a while and I'm laying.
00:38:31
Speaker
So my, if I'm laying on my back of my bed, my, my bathroom's to the right, to the left is the rest of the room, the bathroom and the entrance to the room is to the right. Okay. I'm laying there and I look and then my light's turning on and off in the bathroom. And the doors closed or open? What's that? The doors closed or open? Open. Um, when I went to bed and everything was off. All right. Pitch black. Pitch black nighttime, sleepy time.
00:39:01
Speaker
Window was open, which might not have been a good idea now that we're talking about it. Because it was warm in the room, I couldn't control the temperature. So it's flickering on and off, on and off, and then it stops. I'm like, what the fuck? Is it making a noise? No. And then it flicks on and off again. And my first thought is someone's in my room trying to get me to come to the bathroom to fuck me up.
00:39:31
Speaker
Right. Why would they just fuck me up while I was sleeping? I know. I know. But maybe it's more
Plane Travel Frustrations
00:39:35
Speaker
fun. I don't know what sadistic people think. Right. So I had like a little kitchen area. They had like a stove, a sink, a couple, a pan, a couple of pans. I went to see if there was a knife. Like I slowly walked over and tried to be quiet. No knives. No knives because they were preparing the room to fucking murder you. And you have nothing. No back. You have nothing in your backpack.
00:40:01
Speaker
I didn't have any, all my tools were not with me. So I basically took my pants off. So I was like, they're going to be surprised to see me naked. The good idea. Right. Just a shock of dick out. Right. Oh, you took everything off. Yeah. I was like, it's time to see it's go time. I'm going to battle you. My dick and balls are going to come across your face when we're fighting. Um, I didn't take my goggles off.
00:40:26
Speaker
Just grab your dick just real hard just pull on it or they have a knife. They just cut my dick off the fights over so So I slowly walk around the corner and I'm like, there's no one in the bathroom The light is on at this point is the best small smaller bathroom just enough for a toilet and
00:40:45
Speaker
Is there a shower with like a shower curtain? So they could have been in the shower curtain was back pulled back, but I was like, they're behind this fucking door probably. So I was trying to look through the crack of the door where the hinges are like, okay, nobody. And then I was like, what the fuck is going on? So the light was on the light was on. And, and so did you flip the light switch off? No, I couldn't. It was already off.
00:41:13
Speaker
The light was off but the light was on yes That's was confusing Short what's up the ghost just froze there. He's like shit
00:41:26
Speaker
I shouldn't say to stay with my pants off, but like it goes like, holy shit. Nice. Nice. So I didn't know if it was what was going on because I didn't know if lights could do that if they didn't have any power with the light on. Right. If the light would have been on and it was doing that like the switch was on, I would have been more, you know, like, OK, it was probably a short of some sort, but office confusing.
00:41:52
Speaker
and then the lock is there's two locks on it a deadbolt and like an actual like the cylinder and an actual key to open the door the bathroom no to the my room oh yeah yeah so I mean you have the key though I did have the key yeah I'm sure someone else does too
00:42:13
Speaker
Right. You think the owner probably has this extra set. I'm getting just a randomly rape sexy men like me or kill you. Yeah. Eat you. Yeah. Vampires and shit. Maybe that's it. Maybe they were hungry because there's no food there. It's so expensive. Try to eat a person. There is a lot of vampires in, in Alaska. That's true. So I would, I wouldn't put that. I'm hoping you would eat the vampire. So then I, the next night I slid the door, the chair in front of my door to get into the room, like under the doorknob.
00:42:44
Speaker
just against it so you'd hear something bouncing off it or they would give you a moment to know someone's trying to get in. Could you, is there any way you could have wedged it? No, it wasn't tall enough. No, it sucks. So I really wanted someone, I wanted to hear it happen. So I could be like, ah, you motherfuckers. But I didn't hear anything. I slept through the whole night. So I don't know if the light happened again. I don't know if somebody tried to get in. The door didn't, the chair didn't seem to have moved. Did it take you a little while to fall asleep?
00:43:11
Speaker
No, I passed out man. My body is so fucked on time right now. So it's been an interesting trip. How about the flight from Alaska to the paradise that you're in? Long, very long, six hours or so.
00:43:35
Speaker
Yeah. You wanted to talk about a few things that happened. I know that sucks. Cause like I hate when you talk about what we do in our travel and stuff and it's been this whole hour. Yeah. What I hate. This is interesting things. Uh, you, all right. So first of all, I kind of agree with you on this. Um, wouldn't they now it didn't used to be this way. If you wanted like water, you could be like, you know, they start pouring your water and you're like, can I have the whole bottle? And they're like, yeah, here, sure.
00:44:04
Speaker
There's a whole bottle of water. They don't have bottles of water anymore. Boxes of water. Boxes of water. Which tastes gross. I don't know if it's because I seen it come out of the bottle or the box or because it's out of the box. I've been I've been in first class where they have boxes of water for you. Yeah. And I've drank it and it's horrible.
00:44:25
Speaker
Yeah, do you tell them no thank you? Like, fuck this water. It's not even cold. It's already sitting there when I sit down. No, it's because it's Alaska Airlines. They do box water. Other places do too. That's the only place I've ever seen it. I think I've seen it in other places. I bet it's Alaska that you're getting blurred together with all the travel you do. But it is better for the environment.
00:44:48
Speaker
I guess. I mean, we'll put plastic in. I wouldn't make a difference then, I guess, but it's bad. It's bad. It doesn't taste good. That's not even really wanting to talk about just the fact that box water shouldn't exist. Right. Liquid inside of cardboard is not usually a good thing, right? Milk. Milk comes in a carton and it's the same thing. Paper. Yeah. Milk was so strong tasting that you can get over it.
00:45:18
Speaker
No, it's because they line, in the stores, they line all their boxed whatever drinks with, same with a soda can. They line it with a plastic film. They probably do that with the box water. Not the, no, it doesn't taste like- They probably go through otherwise. How does a box hold water? I mean, if you- Just blew your fucking mind. Beat that Bill Nye the Science guy.
00:45:48
Speaker
fold that box good enough, it'll hold. Sure. The one thing that pissed me off on the plane, well, two things. Well, three, if you count the box water. One is they're making new planes, right? And the old planes, their ventilation system, that shit blows and you could feel it. Yes. Like those little vents are awesome.
00:46:12
Speaker
The little, the little round cones, cone vents. Yeah. That's what I call them. Yeah. The new ones suck. I opened it all the way. I kept adjusting it because I'm like, maybe I don't have it angled, right? It just doesn't make it to you. And then when you turn it to open it, it just keeps turning like it's all turned. It's open, but it just keeps turning to the left. No matter what, like you're just like, this is it. Yeah, I know. And they're little flat discs.
00:46:40
Speaker
You know, I kept adjusting it thinking I'm like, okay, I need a new angle, new angle, new angle. And I could never feel it, but I put my hand up and this feels good. I could tell it was there. But this doesn't blow as hard. So people were like, no, not even close. Some of those vents, you have to turn them like, you have to shut them down a little bit. They're getting crazy. Your hair's getting blown back. Like you're in that commercial for this cassette tapes.
00:47:07
Speaker
So that pissed me off. I kept adjusting. I probably look crazy to people around me. Was it hot as fuck? I was sweating, man. The people, one dude next to me, a darker gentleman. He had a long sleeve shirt on. Was he a native? Had a coat on. Took a little. Native Alaskan? No. Darker than that. And let me tell you, his tennis shoes were red.
00:47:33
Speaker
You guess. You guess. I don't want to profile. You guess what he was. They were Air Jordans, of course. I couldn't tell. They were so red that I couldn't even tell. You couldn't see anything. Everything was red. So he had a coat and a long sleeve shirt. He had his coat over his legs while he was sleeping. Dude, if you're listening, you look gay. If you're a man and one, it's already warm.
00:48:02
Speaker
And you put a jacket over your legs. Well, he probably put it there because he didn't know where else to put it. Maybe. If that was me, I would have folded it and put it to my side or something, not putting it over my legs like an old lady in a shawl. You think he was cold? I don't know. He was, he was out, dude. He was taking pills. He took something as soon as we got on the plane, he was out. He woke up a little bit, took another pill of some sort and was out again.
00:48:27
Speaker
Now imagine, cause you were on the aisle seat. Imagine being in the window seat, hot as fuck. No, the air's not working. Six hour flight. I almost took my shirt off. I had a, I didn't have a t-shirt on. I had a long sleeve from Alaska. I was like, I need to take this off. Oh, you had a shirt under it. Yeah. Why didn't you do that? It's a pretty tight shirt. It looks like I'm being a psycho.
00:48:57
Speaker
I wouldn't give a fuck. I, I panic in those situations. I start to, uh, my anxiety starts to fucking go way up when the air doesn't work and it's a long flight. Oh, yeah. It's the worst. So that the air not working was a huge problem. Here's the other thing though. You were in the back of the plane. Yeah. Back of the plane is the worst place to be for, if you want air.
00:49:23
Speaker
There you go. Now when I walked to the front to get out, the first glass was perfect. It was like cold almost. Yes. So first glass is sucking up all our air. And I couldn't get first glass. They wouldn't even sell it to me.
00:49:38
Speaker
Yeah, you asked because there were some open seats. You're like, nah, I want to buy first class. They're like, nope, that's for upgrade. So, um, the last thing is when you go to another country or to something off the mainland, you have to fill out like a declaration form. Yes.
00:49:58
Speaker
So you have to say like, Hey, I'm not bringing an iguana with herpes or some fruit or some thing that doesn't belong on your land. You don't see iguanas with herpes though. Well, I mean, once you get there, there's no natural predators and all of a sudden it's thriving like chickens. That's probably what happened. Somebody probably brought a chicken over on a plane before they had to do all this. Now chickens run this Island. They do that. You don't see a lot of pigs. They eat those.
00:50:27
Speaker
Yeah, I don't even know where they get those. I think they import those. Um, so they want you to fill out this declaration form. They get on the loudspeaker, whatever the fuck the intercom, the sky waitress fucking moment to shine microphone. And it's usually like 15 minutes before you're going to land. Now they gave me a plenty of time on this one. This was probably like an hour.
00:50:55
Speaker
They're like six hours given time there with a lot of special people on this plane. They give you these papers and you had to fill them out. So you're filling it out. Oh, also, there's a shit ton of turbulence because you're going through a jet stream of some sort. I had about an hour of fucking. Turbulence.
00:51:17
Speaker
And so it looks like you're a three year old. So they tell us on the intercom like, yeah, we need you guys to fill these out. You can't get off the plane till we have them back. Blah, blah, blah. Also, they don't provide us pens. Like who in the fuck is bringing pens? You know what I mean? Who probably is just like, I need a pen at all times. And they shouldn't they have told you this before you boarded your flight? You should fill this out before you do get on the plane.
00:51:45
Speaker
Agreed. Why can't you do it before you get on the plane? Do you have to cross some international line before you can fucking do it? I don't know. So they give it to us. They're like, yeah, we, they don't care what you fill them out in. So they didn't give a fuck. Like they said they could, we could use crayons and ask the kiddos, blah, blah, blah. So I'm like, so you want me an adult man to be like, Hey kid, I'll suck your dick. You should ask the guy next to you. He would have given you a black crayon.
00:52:15
Speaker
He didn't have a ground. He was out, dude. At first, like when they came by, he was passed out. They're like, try to hand me some pretzels that took him and then like look to him and she like made a motion towards me. He didn't respond. She just chucked him at him.
00:52:28
Speaker
That's my favorite when they just throw peanuts and shit at people. Not peanuts, because they don't give you those anymore. Nope. No peanuts. Because people are weak. Uh, pretzels. I can't wait till there's a pretzel allergy. There will be. It's gluten. It's called gluten. So she chucked him at him. I'm like, okay. That was pretty funny. Um, and then when they went through the papers, she tried to hand, she was like handing me one and then she tried to hand it to him. He didn't move. And she's like, she slid it into where his, where you put the menus and stuff.
00:52:56
Speaker
Yeah. Oh, did he wake up at all? Towards the end, he started to wake up and I'm like, bro, you got to fill that out. Like it was already filled out. Everybody's turn their shit in. Luckily, I had like pens. You know, I carry pens because I'm ready for everything. Carry pens. I have an exacto knife. Like I'm ready to take the plane down.
00:53:19
Speaker
You have an exact, like you didn't have it in the hotel room when that goes. I'm not ready for ghosts, but planes. I'm ready for hijackers. Fucking make myself a pen gun. So he's sleeping. He wakes up and like, bro, and he looks at me, he's all fucked up. And I pointed that I'm like, you got to fill that out, dude. He's like, Oh, and then he reaches and he pulls out the menu.
Traveling with Pets and Declaration Form Woes
00:53:45
Speaker
It's like in the paper and pulled out the menu.
00:53:49
Speaker
I said, no, no, no, that paper, dude. I would have let him fill out the menu. He would have tried. So here's where it's going to sound a little racist on my part because of my initial thoughts. But I would have done this the way this guy was looking at this paper. First of all, he didn't turn the light on. Right. He has no idea what's going on. He's in a different world. He might be zoned out from whatever pills he was taking.
00:54:16
Speaker
But he's looking at this paper and he's like putting it close to his face. And I'm like, I keep, I looked at, Hey dude. And I pointed at the light and he just won't look at me now at this point. Right. He's like, fuck you dude. Yeah. Pointed at the light. I gave him a pen and I pointed at the light like three times. I was going to turn mine on and off to show him. I was like, that's probably rude. Cause that's kind of fucked up. Like here, you need a light idiot.
00:54:40
Speaker
At this point, he needs all the help he can get, it sounds like. Dude, so he's like putting me up close to his face. Some of the writing's like in a light pink, so you know you can't see that shit. So he's like looking at it and just staring at it. He's just looking at it and I'm like, oh no, he can't read. Imagine the panic that would wash over you if you had to do that and you couldn't read and they're like, you can't get off the plane until you figure this out and you don't want to admit you can't read.
00:55:06
Speaker
That'd be awesome. You're just like, um, can you feel this album? Yeah. So I'm thinking about this dude, like about this, I'm thinking of this about this guy. And I looked down on my paper and I fucked mine up where you put your last name. There's like little lines and boxes for your name. And I put my last name and I missed. I couldn't see very well either. I even had a light on, but I had like a shadow that my hand was casting when I was filling it out.
00:55:34
Speaker
So I put a space between the two letters of my last name, between two sides of my last name. So it's half a name, space, half a name. So it looks like I'm like foreign. So it was interesting, man. It was interesting. What? Oh, yeah. Got you. King? Yeah. Kind of. It was just like that. The first two and then space and the last two.
00:56:06
Speaker
And then on the back, it asked you like, where are you staying? How many days? I'm like, I had to pull that up. I mean, luckily I had wifi. Yes. Otherwise you would have been like, uh, just guessing. Like, I don't know. This sounds like a hotel. It sounds legit. Yeah. They ask like every, like, where are you going to be? How long are you going to be there? Like, uh, how many people are with you? Do you plan on raping anyone? Are you, uh, what are you doing while you're there? Right. So I don't know if that's just for their tourism board or what.
00:56:37
Speaker
It's kind of weird though. I felt the same way and I had to borrow someone's pen because I didn't have any pens and I was like, this is stupid. They didn't even, and when they gave us the papers, they didn't even say like, oh, we don't have pens. They're just like, here you go. I'm like, okay. You guys don't have pens? They're like, no. Like, okay. Yeah. You guys want us to do this. You give us nothing. Like we're not going to foot the cost of all these pens. We're not going to get these pens back.
00:57:04
Speaker
I was going to write it in blood, like just like punch myself in the face and then you can't masturbate on the plane. I'm trying to write my name. I have nothing. Yeah, that's fucked up. Uh, the guy next to me also picked up like this little toy. There was a kid in front of us that kept standing up on his little middle seat and looking at us, which is unsettling to me. Was he staring at the guy next to you?
00:57:32
Speaker
Well, both of us. I mean, he would take, he was messing with me for a while. That guy was out. So he didn't give a fuck about him. So he's like looking at me and he's like, man, their parents kept pulling him down and shit. Then he was like peeking between the seats and like, dude, you're going to get me to catch a case. I don't want to flirt with you.
00:57:50
Speaker
But the guy must've found some toy. He was holding it up on the seat and they were all busy trying to get shit ready to get off the plane. He's holding it, holding it, holding it. And I was like trying to get their attention too and they didn't pay attention. He just said, fuck it. And then he like slid it under their seat. What?
00:58:10
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know why he didn't just drop it over the top or tap them. It's like, I don't want to have any interactions. I'm going to slide this. He just chucked it under the seat. Wow. And I'm like, usually there's like a thing there to stop stuff. So that didn't make it. That kid lost that toy.
00:58:27
Speaker
Yeah, he'll be okay. He's going to get lots of cool tropical toys. Right. If you were bringing a chicken or an iguana with herpes or some vegetable that you weren't supposed to and your carry on, do you think you're going to tell them on the fucking paper? Are you just going to chuck it when you get somewhere? Like I probably, I guess I shouldn't have that.
00:58:48
Speaker
Well, first of all, how did, how did any of that shit get through TSA before you got on the plane? Fair enough. Like they don't know where you're going. So you can have an apple or something. I guess you can have an iguana with herpes. Probably. If you have the right bag, if it's a stress iguana. That's true.
00:59:07
Speaker
What, and then what do they do? What if you say, yeah, I have, I have, I have this rabid dog with me. Like, what are you going to do to it? We have to launch him into space. We're going to drown him in the ocean. That'd be awesome, dude. So, I mean, if you had something you shouldn't have and you don't want to deal with it, you're not even going to put that on the paper. You're like, fuck that dude. I'll just get rid of it.
00:59:31
Speaker
or keep it or just keep it. Yeah. Like how many people fill it out? Like it didn't even ask you stuff. Like, do you have illegal drugs? Do you have cash? Would you wouldn't say yes to either, but they're like, do you have oranges? Yes, I have oranges. Oh no, they caught me with oranges.
00:59:49
Speaker
I have. If you had oranges, dude, and you were there, you got off the plane, you wrote down, you had oranges, like come with us. Peace. These are our oranges. You had to be our oranges. You can not have the oranges.
Episode Wrap-up and Patreon Teaser
01:00:02
Speaker
So, uh, we also, I also had an incident on the way to Alaska with dog ladies. So.
01:00:09
Speaker
That's right. You had a dog. I thought it was a dog sitting in the seat next to you, but it wasn't quite like that. That would have kind of been cool. It's just a dog strapped in like, all right, bro, we're getting into some turbulence. Relax. It was a dog holding a dog. Kind of. There was two middle, like a couple of middle seats left, the aisle next to me, like the row next to me, and then our row both had middle seats open and this lady with a cane was coming through holding
01:00:34
Speaker
And behind her was whoever was carrying her shit. Right. And she's like, I'm right here, I guess. And the guy had to get up and the girl got her all set in and put her stuff up above and gave her a dog and blah, blah, blah. That guy, that poor guy has to deal with that old lady and the dog now. No doubt. And then that girl's like, I'm sitting right here. I'm like, fuck. And then she had a dog.
01:01:02
Speaker
If you have an anxiety dog, get rid of it. Cause it seems to cause more anxiety than not. You have to like reassure the dog. The dog's not there going, everything's going to be cool, man. Relax. I fly all the time. The dog's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh God. It'd be terrible. There were so many dogs on the plane. Alaska is a weird fucking place, man. Yeah. It's a, it's kind of the wild west. It's the last wild west. It is. I like it. I apologize for taking up that whole episode.
01:01:32
Speaker
That's good. Usually it's me doing that, so it was nice to have you do it this time. Yes. Do you want to regale them with what we have now? We don't say it anymore. We have a Patreon coming up. Patty, patty, patty, patty. I will tell you the topics there. I don't even know what we have. No, the topics is a secret. You have to- Secret topics. Pay for the topics. Come to our Patreon to hear it. It's a paywall.
01:02:03
Speaker
the free stuff. So good. You want more. And we have a special outro that we just had made our new outro. Give us your thoughts on this outro because we, um, are not sure. Yeah. Tell us if it's too much or if it's perfect. We won't do shit about it, but just tell us shout out to Hank. I love you, Hank.
01:02:42
Speaker
Grab the bull!