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00:00:01
So Now What?
61 Plays5 months ago
major updates. GET EXCITED!
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Transcript
Personal Updates and Excitement for Pole Dancing
00:00:00
Speaker
Welcome or welcome back to Awaken big where we get high vibes and talk about the universe. I'm your host Danny. Okay, where have I been? What the fuck has been going on? Well, guys, a lot has been the fuck going on and I'm definitely gonna get into all of it. I want to start off kind of light. First off, a lot of great things have been going on.
00:00:20
Speaker
thing that I'm probably most excited about is it has nothing to do with y'all, but I am getting so good at pole dancing. If you want to see videos, go to our Instagram. If you want to see videos, go to my Instagram. I'm fucking slang and it's so much fun. I'm getting arm muscles for the first time in my goddamn life. I didn't know that was possible for me. I have been athletic and into some type of fitness training my entire life. Never had arm muscles.
00:00:44
Speaker
Not for lack of trying. Okay, sometimes for lack of trying, but not always for lack of trying. And it's just nice to have some upper body strength for once, okay? Also, the YouTube channel is going so well. I'm so grateful for grateful. Did I just say fart by mistake? Sometimes my mouth is a little bit slower than my brain. I bet you can relate.
00:01:03
Speaker
But thank you so much for everybody who has tuned in to the YouTube channel. I know a lot of you listening now have also been subscribing and commenting and showing love, and it means seriously so much to me. You have no idea. YouTube has become like, I mean, it's always been an obsession of mine. I'm such a YouTube kid. I grew up on it like and I'm talking OG YouTube. OK, y'all don't know you weren't there. Graveyard girl, bitch. Glozell, bitch.
00:01:26
Speaker
Do y'all remember JuicyStar07? I digress. Thank you so much for all of the love on YouTube. Please continue to show love. I'm having so much fun. Thank you for having fun with me. Also, thank fuck. My husband finished his insane work schedule. He was on these night shifts and they were 12-hour shifts. And I don't know what's wrong with me, but if he's on the night shift, apparently I'm on the goddamn night shift. So I just felt like my sleep schedule was absolutely insane.
00:01:51
Speaker
Um, last little update. I've been on a healthy hair journey and bitch, let me tell you, this world was not made to serve poor people. And let me explain.
00:02:02
Speaker
I am 26 years old and I caved, right? I'm just like, I have a lot of issues with my hair, not actual issues. I'm very picky. One of my OCD kind of things is I hyper focus on my hair. It's a thing and I'm working on it, okay? I have a therapist, leave me alone, mind you business. Regardless, I thought, okay, you know what? I'm gonna bite the bullet and on my next paycheck, I'm gonna get some nice expensive ass shampoo.
00:02:27
Speaker
Y'all, I spent $120 total on the shampoo and conditioner. I was like, that was disgusting. I can't believe this shit better fix my hair. I'm pissed. Why did that shit actually fix my hair? Hey, redkin, redkin all soft. I love you, bitch. If I had to choose between redkin or my vibrator, yay, yay, yay. I'm gonna be an unhappy camper, but I think I'm gonna choose redkin. I have a husband, so I guess, you know, I'll be fine. Okay, moving on.
00:02:55
Speaker
you know, duality exists.
Podcast Changes and Solo Hosting
00:02:57
Speaker
The last episode that was posted for Awakened Big was all about duality, right? So with that, some changes are happening with Awakened Big, some stuff going on behind the scenes and just in our personal lives. So it's been a lot. And this I truly believe is for the best moving forward. It is just going to be me on here on the podcast, unless of course I have guests. So
00:03:20
Speaker
I have lots of really exciting topics planned. I really look forward to sharing with y'all and smoking with y'all and getting high or just high vibes and talking about the universe. Obviously change is scary and it's stuff to adjust to, but something about me is I've always been very solution oriented and that's exactly what I'm doing right now. I'm getting excited. I almost didn't record tonight because I was just kind of like in a rut, I suppose is how to put that. And then I was like, you know what bitch, you know what you're gonna do? You're gonna take an everything shower.
00:03:47
Speaker
and then after your everything shower, you're gonna smack the fuck out of that gravity bong and then you're gonna go give the best where have I been update of your goddamn life. It's probably not the best, okay, you guys? But I'm trying. I love y'all. Thank you for listening and understanding. Anyway.
00:04:04
Speaker
I wanted to change our intro, right? Or I guess the intro for Awake and Bake. For a while it was an educational, high vibrational, mystical, spiritual show written by Kelsey. That's fantastic. And I really loved it and it served its purpose. I think Awake and Bake is evolving and I think that I am evolving and I don't want to be your teacher. I don't want to be your educator. And it's just honestly what this podcast is, it's literally getting high.
00:04:30
Speaker
or high vibes, whatever you prefer, and talking about the universe. I just think that fits it better. That is also the updated and kind of has been for a while now intro on YouTube. I changed it on YouTube a bit ago because I just you know, YouTube is essentially just a smoke with me channel where we just talk about whatever the fuck I feel like talking about. And it's all usually about the universe or somehow related to spirituality. And if not directly, it's like whatever we can we can just kind of exaggerate and say that it is okay. One thing about me, I love a good exaggeration.
00:05:02
Speaker
So yeah, I want to talk about change today, but I'm not talking about like, here's how you handle change. I want to know how do you guys handle change? Um, cause there's a lot of times where I think I know what I will do in a situation and then I'm in that situation and bitch, I'm like, well, I didn't account for this detail. So I'm not so sure.
00:05:21
Speaker
Hey chat, drop a comment below on how you handle change. Chat, okay chat? Personally, I am working on just flowing with it, flowing with the curtain. The curtain, the current, sorry. Look guys, if you just flow with the current, you'll just get to where you're going faster and you'll be less exhausted than if you just try to fight against it the whole time. It's gonna hurt more, you're gonna be worn out, just fucking go with it. It's inevitable and you don't wanna drown, so just flow.
Embracing Change and Journaling as Therapy
00:05:46
Speaker
I would love to come on here more and discuss cannabis education and things that are easy to understand. So, cannabis education has always been scary for me and I want to break that down more and that's something that I want to change as well within this channel as I want to talk way more about cannabis and make it like a
00:06:07
Speaker
make cannabis for dummies, right? We're going to turn out some educated stoners, but I'm going to make it so digestible because I am someone who needs stuff explained to me very simply. And when people are like, Oh, I'm a visual learner. I'm a this learner. I'm a simple learner, bitch. You need to break it down. Like I am five years old, but don't talk to me like I'm five years old because I'll peep that and I'll get a fucking attitude. I get it. I'm hard to please.
00:06:28
Speaker
So I am flowing with change. I am focusing on Awake and Bake. I am focusing on all of the wonderful aspects in my life that I have going for me and I'm watering those.
00:06:38
Speaker
Another thing with the topic of change is I would love to talk about how spirituality evolves and it has different phases for different phases of life. And let's get into that a little bit right now, actually. So I took a break from daily journaling for a long time. It served me so well, especially in the beginning of my spiritual journey. Growing up, I always wanted to have like a journal or a diary, but I did not know what the fuck to do and how to have it. And I would just put the most random shit grocery list one day.
00:07:04
Speaker
Oh, uh, this is a cute movie star one day and you know who the cute movie star was y'all I'm so embarrassed to say this george lopez. I was in love with george lopez But let's not talk about that. I just had to I I just can't have any secrets about myself. Sorry anyway, I took a break from the daily journaling that star I started doing that around like
00:07:23
Speaker
2019 and then by 2020 I mean I was like every single day don't miss start my day like that it is not only is it like ritualistic I was like on my military grind with it like I was not missing it had to be wake up this time sharp so that I have enough time to start my day get to work do my workout da da da da
00:07:42
Speaker
So for a while I stopped doing that and I wasn't journaling at all. And now I've been kind of using it as needed as a tool. Cause I find that when I just let myself like only use my journal when I feel called to, it's not for everybody. We're not all goddamn writers. And I think that's okay. We all can be, but like, if it's not bringing you pleasure, like don't fucking force yourself. So my therapist, the other day I was ranting and raving and I was hooting and hollering and all that good motherfucking shit bitch.
00:08:08
Speaker
And she was like, wow, like your feelings are so valid. I want you to know I'm validating them. But before we have this conversation with people, I think we should journal these feelings because we don't necessarily want to say everything to these people that we're talking about that you just said to me.
00:08:22
Speaker
And I was like, yeah, that's so real. Absolutely. Um, so I thank you for my therapist, by the way. Love you, Marissa. I don't think you're supposed to say you love your therapist. Uh, sorry, that's awkward. Marissa, hope you're not listening, but I love that bitch. She's cool. Anyway, speaking of therapy, utilizing talk therapy is a spiritual practice.
00:08:45
Speaker
I don't know how many times we talk about like feel your feelings emotions and feelings are meant to be felt. It's okay to express yourself. That's what this shit is. And I think alchemizing your energy. So for me personally, usually I bring one energy into the session and I kind of I usually just know what I want to talk about. I got a lot of shit that I could complain about and I got a lot of trauma. So I usually go into these sessions pretty already know what I'm going to say.
00:09:11
Speaker
and I have this certain energy. And what I love is that my therapist has helped me really work on alchemizing that energy and how can I take that energy and either utilize it for myself, figure out how to protect myself energetically with it, figure out how to flip it
00:09:26
Speaker
put that thing now flipping and reverse it and make it work in a way that's going to be productive for me. And I'm so grateful for that. I think also there's something to be said about like giving therapy time. So I've loved my therapist since we first started. Okay, not like I love you like what I just said before. I've just really enjoyed working with her. But wow, like after like a certain amount of months, you can really see like the growth in yourself and like the accountability and I'm just really grateful.
00:09:53
Speaker
And I did mention this earlier, but another type of therapy I've been utilizing is physical movement, which I've always done, but specifically pole dancing, or dance, body movement in general.
Pole Dancing and Self-Expression
00:10:03
Speaker
So
00:10:04
Speaker
I am really grateful that I'm at a place now where I don't feel like I need to be in the gym for aesthetic reasons. It's more just for like health reasons and strength. And I'm not gonna lie, maybe like once a week, a heavy leg day is great to maintain the peach, okay? Because what I'm finding is with pole dancing, I'm getting strong, I'm getting ripped, but bitch, I'm getting lean.
00:10:23
Speaker
And I'm a curvy girl, but like when you're all muscle, like, I don't know. I'm just like, come on now. I personally love a little curve. So I'm like, keep the shape, bitch. Anyway, I'm loving doing pull. I'm also just loving connecting with my divine feminine and my sacral chakra and like centering myself that way. I sometimes forget that bitch.
00:10:44
Speaker
I'm just like a slut. But like the slut with the heart of gold, the one that you love, right? Like I'm not doing anything wrong. I just like I'm a very sexual person. And to know me is to love me and to accept that. Or you absolutely fucking hate it. But then like, bitch, go away.
00:11:00
Speaker
So one way that I've been alchemizing my energy is through the pole, like a physical movement. I love like getting out my energy through physical movement and expressing myself through physical movement. And then with that, with, you know, the whole sacral chakra, divine feminine energy thing, honestly releasing it through, you know, we've talked about sex magic before. Go listen to our old episode with Kaylee Hyman, but releasing it through sex magic and turning it into something different and something productive and something that will serve me.
00:11:28
Speaker
Cause I know at the end of the day, all of this is for me, right? It's all like a learning lesson. It's all making me stronger. Sometimes damn just shit happens. And I'm just like, I was not prepared. And then lastly, okay, I have been doing this glamor magic routine, but it's not like the typical like hair and makeup.
00:11:43
Speaker
like i said before i was working more on hair health i'm working more on skin health i'm doing like a little bit of makeup because bitch i just realized if i add a little bit of mascara it just makes a world of difference i don't know why um but heavy on the health right but what i'm also doing is like clothes and jewelry that i feel good in regardless of how it like looks if it doesn't look like
00:12:05
Speaker
fancy enough for some people or it doesn't look fashionable enough for some people. I am so much more comfortable and productive and honestly intelligent, like I'm able to be my best self and like get shit done and feel empowered when I'm fucking comfortable and a bitch has sensory issues. Leave me the fuck alone. If I feel one more seam on my body, on my toes, from my socks, I can't deal with it, guys. I'm going to freak the fuck out.
00:12:30
Speaker
I have to wear jeans for work and I only wear baggy jeans because I'm not kidding. If the seam is not perfectly lined up to my ass crack or like from my ankle up to my like cooter, uh-uh. And the last spiritual practice that I have been utilizing probably the most during this time is intentional time
Grounding with Pets and Final Thoughts
00:12:49
Speaker
with my dogs. And you might be thinking that was literally such a bullshit tip or a bullshit whatever. No, no, no, seriously, let me explain. Obviously, I always hang out with my dogs. They live with me. I take care of them. I love them. I play with them. All that good shit.
00:12:59
Speaker
but hear me out y'all they will not be here forever and they center me so much and i love being with them and when you actually take the time it is better to do this high not better for them more fun for you but it's great no matter what okay but
00:13:15
Speaker
take the time when you're playing with them to like talk to them while you're playing with them and like really like look at them and like observe their little personalities and because they do have their own little personalities and they love you so much and they're just these sweet pure angels it's been so healing for me just being really intentional and spending intentional time with my animals
00:13:34
Speaker
I know for a lot of people, hikes really ground them and things like that really ground them. I love that stuff, but I did not really grow up on that. What I did grow up on is dogs and dogs center me and they make me feel like I'm one with nature and one with the world and all of the stuff that a hike does for all of you crazy bitches, okay?
00:13:54
Speaker
Anyway, there's lots of beautiful things to be grateful for. There's lots of beautiful things I can use to center myself. And also, I know that life is always changing. Like I literally know this and I talk about it all the time. It's just when it happens to me, sometimes I'm like, what the fuck, bitch? Why? So we must flow with it and I'm gonna flow with it and I shall. And so it is, bitch, okay?
00:14:16
Speaker
Thank you guys for listening. I know this is a pretty short episode, especially since what was it? One, two episodes ago, we made that whole announcement about we're going to be doing longer episodes and da da da da. Hey guys, life happens. It's okay. Shit happens. Thank you for being patient. Thank you for being here with us. Um, I know that Kelsey has had the most incredible time doing awake and bake and super grateful for all of you. And I'm really grateful for all of you who are going to stick around going forward. We're going to have, we're just going to keep leveling up. Let's just leave it at that.
00:14:45
Speaker
Have a great rest of your day, night, or whatever you got going on. Party, party, party. Let's all get schwaisted off the weed, please, off the weed. Anyway, stay high.