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The Truth About Commitment When You’re Building Your Dream Life (The Missing Piece To Your Next Level Without Force & Burnout)
16 Plays1 month ago
Whether you've had a hard time sticking with commitments you make OR you've found yourself feeling burnt out from your commitments, and you crave MORE balance and flow, while still getting sh*t done, this episodes for you.
You'll walk away with:
- new mindset shifts + perspectives to go about your goals
- my own stories that you can use for deeper understandings
- difference between emotion vs intuition
- aligned commitment vs forced
- a practical body testing tool to help you trust yourself more
Enjoyed this episode? Give it 5 stars and share with a friend. Send me a screenshot of your review on IG @darshvibess (screenshot before you submit the review), and I'll send you a free gift ;) ORRRR just leave me a review anyway haha ilyyyyy
Let's connect ;)
Youtube: @itsdarshna
Follow + connect with me on Instagram: @darshvibess
Tiktok: @itsdarshna
Have feedback + topic requests? Email me: nextleveldarsh@gmail.com.
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Transcript
Darsh's Return and Managing Overwhelm
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello everybody and welcome back to the She's Next Level podcast. It's your girl Darsh and I'm so excited to be back here with you guys from my break that I took last week. If you're not following me on Instagram, I announced last week that I was going to take a break from podcasting and just releasing an episode after being consistently showing up for like the past month of the release of my podcast.
00:00:26
Speaker
And mainly because I am obviously building another business at the same time. So this is like my sole purpose career and business. And then I'm also building a PDF automation business as well.
00:00:40
Speaker
And so it was a little bit overwhelming just building two things at the same time. I mean, not that I cannot do it because I obviously feel like I can do whatever I set my mind to, but it was just a little bit overwhelming for me. And I noticed as well that I was also like feeling a little bit of resistance while
Pressure and Podcast Frequency Advice
00:01:01
Speaker
that was happening. And so I knew that I had to just lean back.
00:01:05
Speaker
And I also knew that with this new commitment, which is this podcast that I'm creating, I was also putting pressure on myself. um And it was really because i was just ultra committed and I am.
00:01:18
Speaker
There's also something about being ultra committed to anything because obviously then you can put pressure on yourself and you can just, and we're going to get into that a little bit in the episode today. but um also like I had a intuitive read that past week, I believe it was the week before that I had that read.
00:01:38
Speaker
I remember ah remember the person I was getting a read from that I was practicing with, she had told me that, you know, if I release two episodes a week, then I'll be able to condense the timeline and accelerate my success.
00:01:51
Speaker
And that overwhelmed me a little bit more because I was like, okay, well, I'm already like just trying to do this like video podcast once a week. And that was like,
00:02:03
Speaker
a little overwhelming for me because you know when you're doing a video you are like obviously making sure everything is set and you're like making sure everything is perfect and obviously we are like moving away from perfectionism but there is a certain standard that I have for myself that I enjoy of like looking at least somewhat put together and also mentally being ready to like record ah podcast episode on video because let me tell you it is so different recording on audio versus video.
Choosing Podcast Formats and Self-Commitment
00:02:34
Speaker
Today I'm actually recording audio obviously you can tell and i just want to mention that i am giving myself permission to do things differently and this is part of the inspiration of this podcast episode when it comes to your commitments um but I want to give myself permission to obviously you know create my podcast and my brand in the way that i want to and doing it my way and i think i was what was happening for me was i was like thinking about like you know most podcasts that do really well that are successful are video but then i also didn't realize that no that that's not the only case like there are audio podcasts out there that are also successful and that i can do it whatever way that i want to
00:03:24
Speaker
So, moving forward, I don't know if I'm going to be doing two episodes a week. I am going to at least stick with once a week because I've also learned that I'd rather enjoy the process than try to rush myself in the process and that's like a whole other manifestation episode that I can dive into another day.
00:03:42
Speaker
But... um I am definitely going to play around with like audio and video and see which way that feels best for me. Obviously, I like to like challenge myself. So of course, I'm going to still do the video, but it's going to be based on like how I feel.
00:03:59
Speaker
And today I feel like recording in my PJs today and recording this podcast episode for you guys. And that's going to be audio for me. I don't feel like being on camera. So we're still going to get the message across. The message is always a lot more important than the way that it's delivered. And so that's also something that leads me to this conversation, this topic of conversation.
00:04:20
Speaker
commitment which i had an intuitive pull this morning to talk to you guys about this and so that's what we're gonna do so if you've been follow me since herbalife days then you guys know i am one committed as okay especially having an aries moon i can literally go zero to 100 real quick And I've always had this level of thinking, like, if I'm going to do anything, i am going all in.
00:04:48
Speaker
There is no half-assing in my vocabulary. And while that is a great thing, and it's obviously evoked great qualities within me in getting shit done, it's also has its own nuances.
00:05:00
Speaker
And that those are some of the things that I'm going to be breaking down in this podcast episode. And also stay tuned until the very end because I will be sharing a practical tool with you guys that you guys can use with your body, which is fun.
00:05:15
Speaker
I love doing things with my body. I love moving my body. I love everything to do with the body. But I'm going to be sharing with you guys a tool that is proven that you guys can start using to trust yourself more.
00:05:29
Speaker
and also, really quickly, be sure to subscribe to this podcast if you haven't already so that you guys don't miss out when I drop a new episode, which is ideally for now every week.
00:05:41
Speaker
Okay, so before I get into the logistics of this episode and everything to do with commitment, at least in my opinion, how I feel about it, having experience with it and being able to obviously commit and like create the things that I have and how I'm moving about it now. I will say that the key foundation that you got to have to really be, you know, successful when it comes to like being committed to your things that you want to create for yourself is that you got to commit to yourself before you commit to anything.
00:06:13
Speaker
And what this means is that you got to put yourself first in all of the ways. And that's basically you committing to yourself, because when you do that, other people will commit to you. Other situations, other things will commit to you. It is the universal law.
00:06:29
Speaker
And this is basically in a nutshell what self love is. Now, if you guys do want me to do an episode separately on self-love, I can dive deeper into that because this has been one of the things that I have been working on for a very, very, very long time now.
00:06:46
Speaker
And I'm working on mastering because it is literally the key to everything that you want. But I'm not going to get into it in this episode because this episode is about commitments and it's going to be a little bit different than that.
00:06:59
Speaker
But I can totally do that. Just let me know on my Instagram, which if you're not following me on Instagram, you guys can check out the information in the description and follow me, girl. I would love to connect with you.
00:07:11
Speaker
okay but to keep things simple and efficient and to help you understand this concept on a deeper
Focusing on Feelings over Outcomes
00:07:18
Speaker
level. I am going to share like one of the two core reasons why people have a hard time committing to their goals. and when I say this, I mean like if you are someone that, you know, maybe has made a new year's resolution, um a lot of people do obviously with like their fitness goals or like maybe you you've been wanting to start your business and you've been wanting to like be consistent with like maybe posting on Instagram or like be consistent with maybe even starting a podcast like I have and you just haven't found the motivation or you haven't found um
00:07:57
Speaker
the time or whatever it is, whatever. And I'm going to say this, it's going to be excuses because they are. And I'm going to get into like why with everything. But if you just haven't found the way for you to consistently show up for yourself, show up for the things that you say that you want to create, then These are the reasons why. okay the first one is that you are focused on the outcome versus the feelings that those things that you want brings you.
00:08:26
Speaker
And I know that this is like if you're in a manifestation world, like people talk about this often of like, you know, the identity, like the law of assumption, like becoming the thing that you want to become to attract it.
00:08:38
Speaker
But I want to kind of go into this a little bit deeper because ah I want to explain it in a way that actually like fucking clicks for you. And I really hope it does, because I know it does for me when I realize this. um And I've had my own realizations about this in my own journey about like the feelings versus the outcome and how we can go about that.
00:08:58
Speaker
And then also the other reason is that you are a little bit too extreme like me, and like how I was in my case, which can lead to exhaustion and also like disconnect you from your feminine creative energy and that is like probably why you're not like flexible enough to try different ways to go about your goals okay and i say this and i say this with the ultimate love tough love with the ultimate love you cannot commit to your goals of having your dream life
00:09:30
Speaker
the dream body, the success, the money, the husband, the quality friends, if you don't know why you are committing in the first place. Okay, a lot of people don't even know why they want what they want, because they are so focused on having the things, because maybe it means something about them.
00:09:48
Speaker
For the most part, it really does. But that's never ever the case. What we want is the feelings that they bring you. okay this is what we want because we're all energetic beings whether you're aware of it or not if you're listening to this podcast then i'm sure you have some level of knowledge with manifestation and you're spiritual to some extent and so we are spiritual being beings and we manifest through feelings like we feel that's what we have emotions for and so this is why when people manifest their goals they usually manifest from a place of lack because they haven't cultivated
00:10:24
Speaker
the feelings of what they want to feel, which is behind the why of like why they wanted the thing in the first place, then that is why they feel this void. And I have been there, you guys, okay?
00:10:36
Speaker
I have been there with money. i have been there with my fitness goals even. And this is what had led me to, you know, starting my self-image and my self-love and like my intuition journey and like really rediscovering myself and getting to know myself on a deeper level.
00:10:52
Speaker
because I was so focused on the outcome versus like cultivating the becoming like the process of becoming and the feelings and like I was just so focused on you know making the six figures and having a fit body that like when I had those things it did not feel like it was enough okay even though had those things and I thought that that's what I wanted and I was just so focused on those outcomes this feeling of enoughness will truly fuck you if you are not clear on like your why and if you're just focused on the outcome of the things and like focus on having all of these things it will fuck you if you are not clear on your why and if you're also not focused on like the becoming the process the journey really cultivating those feelings now versus like when it all arrives so it's really important to get get clear on if okay if the commitments are
00:11:48
Speaker
are the things that you actually want and if they are in alignment for you.
Values, Flexibility, and True Motivations
00:11:53
Speaker
Okay. Because a lot of the things that we want, sometimes it's just our human wanting it because it feels like it's going to feel this way or that way when it has those things. But like some people don't value the same things in the way that others do. And so you got to know what your values are.
00:12:11
Speaker
And if you hear that, I don't know if you hear the train in the background, but I live by like a railroad track station. So if you guys hear that, excuse the noise. But anyways, you guys got to get clear on what it is that you value and why do you value it? And if that's an alignment for you, because you won't be committed long-term otherwise, okay? If you are doing things for the outcome, for the shortcut, for the short short-term instant gratification whatever it is, like that's not gonna work.
00:12:44
Speaker
You gotta be committed long-term and you gotta see the vision of that and you gotta know that it will be worth it for the long term if you follow through. And if you do want to do this thing, like this is going to be worth it long term.
00:12:57
Speaker
And that is the only way you'll know is if you're clear on your why. Like nowadays, i don't do anything unless I see the long-term vision and i see that it'll be worth it for me because it's an alignment for me it's in alignment with my values and so that's what helps me get committed in the first place that's what makes me decide and it's always a decision everything is a decision everything is a choice that we make that helps me decide like okay This is actually in alignment with my values and my goals, like even this podcast, you know, I've always like for the past.
00:13:31
Speaker
I love talking, OK, but I never really realized that podcasting was going to be like a thing for me. But once I realized, like, you know, podcasts were coming out a few years ago and I started seeing that I was like, I could totally see myself doing that.
00:13:45
Speaker
but I never had the commitment, like the the reason to start it because I've had my own like limitations and my limiting beliefs, of course, but I always knew that this is something that I could see myself doing long-term. So I am committed to it somehow. Energetically I was, but physically I didn't do anything to start it.
00:14:03
Speaker
And so when I did start this podcast a month ago, I told myself, I decided like, this is it. I'm going all in no matter what. You got to have that No matter what attitude.
00:14:15
Speaker
And why I got to that no matter what attitude was because it's in alignment with my values with something that I actually enjoy and I love and it's in alignment for me truly on a human and on the soul level.
00:14:28
Speaker
And so you got to get clear on your why and that is what's going to help you. and, on you know, getting committed to your goals and your desires and whatever it is, like at least get you started on that path.
00:14:41
Speaker
And also like don't do things because other people are doing it. Focus on the becoming, don't focus on the outcome because ultimately, You are going to get that. Okay. It's there for you. It's available for you, but you got to be committed before you can access that.
00:14:56
Speaker
And let's be real. Like you would rather want the thing anyways, when you're feeling good and you already feel like you have what the, what you want, like you already have that within you that you would be okay without having it.
00:15:09
Speaker
That's how committed you want to feel with the thing that you have, because then you're not going to put this unnecessary pressure on yourself. You won't be doing things that you don't enjoy. And it'll just be well received versus receiving it from a place of lack and receiving it from a place of like not feeling enough.
00:15:28
Speaker
And it's because you were so attached the outcome. You're going to feel so empty if you do it from like just an outcome mentality. And I've been there. So trust me on this. And maybe you've been there too. And that's why you're listening to this because you're just like, why can I not commit to anything? And it's just because you are not focused on why. And you are also not focused on the feelings that you actually want versus the thing, like the thing that's actually going to raise your vibration and create that and so much more that's actually attainable long term because feelings you can always cultivate and keep with you and hold with you.
00:16:05
Speaker
But things change, okay, things and outcomes change all the time. And so really honing in on that. I mean, this also helped me not rush myself either. I was doing a lot of that, i'm not going to lie, especially previously and even most recently, you know, as I've been really shifting through my own commitments and what it is that I want to do and the way that I want to do it.
00:16:28
Speaker
I was just having this like rushy energy and I was like, why am I rushing for? Oh, I'm rushing because I want the outcome a lot faster. Well, why do I want the outcome a lot faster? Because if I already felt like I had it, if i already cultivated the feelings within myself, and I really focused on the process, the journey and the becoming, then I wouldn't really want to rush anything because I enjoy it so freaking much right now. Like I am living, truly living, guys, truly living. And that's when you keep showing up because you just enjoy it, which leads me to the next thing. And that is what I mentioned a little bit earlier about being too extreme about your commitments.
00:17:09
Speaker
That is also another way that you can fuck yourself up with your commitments because you're not allowing yourself to breathe and be flexible enough to actually enjoy the process.
00:17:21
Speaker
And I know that this was a big one for me um because I was just like all in mentality and like zero to 100, like real quick. And I was just like, how you do one thing is how you do everything. And yes, there is some truth to that.
00:17:36
Speaker
But without honoring yourself and your energy and flex having some flexibility in the way that you get to go about the things that you want, like that can really that's where the nuance comes in. like That can really fuck you. So this is also why I feel like a lot of people give up too easily. They give up too soon.
00:17:56
Speaker
It's because of this extreme mentality when it comes to your commitments. Because a lot of people forget, and I did for a bit too, that there are a thousand ways to reach a goal.
00:18:07
Speaker
OK, there's a thousand paths to the main goal. plan you got to follow what works for you versus what works for everybody else. Because a lot of people just blindly look at the results from somebody like a success from somebody that works for them. And then they're like, let me try that too, because it worked for them without ever checking in with themselves.
00:18:29
Speaker
And like, we're all different. Okay, we're all special, unique and different in our own ways. And one thing for somebody does not going to mean it's going to work for somebody else. It may have worked for a few people, but doesn't mean it's going to work with you.
00:18:42
Speaker
And so again, there's nothing wrong with trying things out. Like I have definitely like I'm a huge experimenter here. and This is how I come up with things and see what works and see what doesn't and all of that. It's really fun trying things out, but also like pay attention to how you feel. And this was something that I was not doing. I was just having this like this whole saying of like discipline.
00:19:05
Speaker
i was just disciplined versus being devoted. And there's two different things. There are two different things when it comes to having a commitment to your commitments.
00:19:17
Speaker
Discipline to me just feels like I'm doing something because I know that that's something I'm meant to do, but I don't really feel lit up about it or I'm just doing it because I know that's what I'm supposed to be doing and I'm just doing it to get it done, like checking off a box from my list versus devotion feels like me doing something because I'm just devoted. Like I love it. I enjoy it. And it's just something that,
00:19:44
Speaker
I enjoy like it's not something that I'm making myself do is something that I'm choosing. It's that choosing energy. And so just like sit with yourself and ask yourself, because these are the things that i ask myself, too. And I usually like ask myself, is this something that I can see myself doing long term?
00:20:02
Speaker
Is it something that I enjoy and can I enjoy this way of doing things? Like, can I enjoy another way of doing this if I don't enjoy it this way and being more flexible and open with that? Like, what other ways can I go about this um you know that will help me stay consistent?
00:20:20
Speaker
That is a big one because there's, again, a thousand ways to do something. So, for example, let's just say you want to lose weight and you've been on a weight loss journey. For a while. And most people, okay, when especially when it comes to New Year's, everyone fucking does this and it's just so funny to see it on repeat.
00:20:39
Speaker
Because i don't know if people ever realize like, they do it and then they don't like stick with it and then they just do it again. It's like... What are you doing? But most people will go extreme, like right away.
00:20:52
Speaker
Okay. And they will sign up for the gym, they'll start restricting their calories instantly. And without like doing all this without ever asking, why do they want to do it in the first place?
00:21:04
Speaker
Okay, why do you want to lose the weight in the first place? It's not because you want that physical body and that's all that you want. Truly on a soul level, to keep it real with you guys, when I really sat with this, and I realized this on a deeper level, you actually want to feel vitality.
00:21:23
Speaker
You want to feel energized, you want to feel youthful, you want to feel strong, you want to feel healthy, like, That is the reason why you probably work out. Now, don't get me wrong. We do want to look good. Okay, we do want to have a nice, like, fit, you know, sexy body, of course.
00:21:41
Speaker
But that is not the ultimate motivation. That's not the reason why, which, again, you can have both things. There's nothing wrong with that. but that's not the real reason why.
00:21:52
Speaker
Like having that body is going to bring you those feelings. So how can you bring those feelings to yourself without attaching to that outcome? So make it work for you. How many times, you know, am I able to work out this week that feel good to me versus obligation like discipline energy?
00:22:10
Speaker
Not how many times I think I should work out, but how many times a week am I okay with working out that feels good to me that I'm able to show up for? Like really sit down and check in with your higher self and be honest with yourself to see what fits.
00:22:27
Speaker
And you don't have to go hard right away. Like, You can take tiny steps towards showing up for yourself and just keep going at it until you know, okay, let's add in a little bit more. Let's do this a little bit more.
00:22:38
Speaker
Even allowing room for flexibility to change things that you may thought that you have enjoyed but you don't actually enjoy in the process. And then switch it up. Like, give yourself permission to switch things up in the way that you're going about your goals because, again, like,
00:22:55
Speaker
There are so many people doing things in so many different ways, which goes to show that it's OK for that to be the case for you, too. Like you get to make it fun. And that's the point, right?
00:23:05
Speaker
Like the journey is meant to be fun. And where do we just suck the fun out of our commitments that we make? Like literally. Where where do we do that because of what society is doing or is there a better way? Is there another way? And there always is.
Enjoying the Journey and Recognizing Progress
00:23:22
Speaker
OK, so here's where we're going to get a little nuance. So let's say that you're doing all of these things, OK, and you are still wondering why you're not seeing any results. Girl, I get you because I have been there even this past week. OK, even literally the other day yesterday, I was at the gym.
00:23:41
Speaker
And I had these like creepy little thoughts come in and they were like, girl, like, look at you. Like, do you I don't really feel like I'm seeing any progress. And I had to catch myself real fucking quick.
00:23:54
Speaker
Thankfully, I'm very aware and awareness is so, so, so powerful. Like if you can do anything is just be aware, like focus on being aware So aware that you're aware that you're aware.
00:24:06
Speaker
Because the moment I catch those thoughts, I flipped it real quick, because I did not allow that train of thoughts to go, go deeper. um so I was just like, what do you mean? Like, you're showing up? How do you feel? i asked myself, i was like, how do you feel though? Like, how have you been feeling? Do you feel a lot better? Do you feel more strong?
00:24:26
Speaker
Have you been feeling a lot more aligned and energetic and like connected to your higher self and your intuition like I started asking myself those things and it's true because I have then I was not focused on the body anymore because what i actually want which we all do is those feelings and so that helped me but anyways So when you do this, though, okay, like what I did, and I was just like, where, why am I not seeing my results of like having an episode, that means that you're still focused on the outcome.
00:24:56
Speaker
Okay, because the person who cultivates these feelings every day, and allows herself to be flexible in her commitments as well, she doesn't need the outcome to feel good and be committed to her goals.
00:25:12
Speaker
I want to repeat that again, because if there's anything that i want you to take away, you can take away this fucking sentence right here is the person who cultivates these feelings of whatever it is that you want in your life and what you feel like it's going to give you when you have it.
00:25:28
Speaker
those feelings, the person who cultivates those feelings every day and allows herself to be flexible in her commitments, okay, flexibility, doesn't need the outcome to feel good,
00:25:41
Speaker
and being committed to her goals. She literally becomes the outcome. Okay, she becomes the outcome. And it's only a matter of time that her continuing to show up for herself, that she will manifest her goals.
00:25:57
Speaker
It's inevitable. Because you are literally an energetic match. Okay. And it usually happens in the most random ways that you'll never expect. I know that that has been the case with me with like my money goals, my fitness goals, where I didn't even realize, um,
00:26:14
Speaker
Funny story in my first weight loss journey when I was 15 and a half going on 16, I had lost 45 pounds in six months. It was very, very, very fast. And I had no idea what the hell I was doing.
00:26:27
Speaker
um i didn't even have like the money for hiring a personal trainer. So I was literally going to the gym, watching everybody and then just copying them and doing what they're doing.
00:26:38
Speaker
And I remember in the beginning, it was like very tough. You know, I was, you know, getting myself there some way, somehow, and doing what I had to do. But I remember my journey as I kept going, I kept showing up for myself and I started to feel like better every single day. I was like starting to notice the little shifts and in my energy and like how I felt.
00:27:01
Speaker
I remember when I fully had lost the weight, i didn't even realize I lost the weight until someone told me that you're going to have to shop at Baby cap baby Gap if you keep going.
00:27:13
Speaker
And I was like, What? What do you mean? And then I looked in the mirror, guys. Okay, I looked in the mirror and i was like, oh my God, I've lost so much weight. didn't even realize because I fell in love with the journey and the process. And I kid you not, I have never stopped working out since then.
00:27:30
Speaker
Never. Since I started, I have not stopped working out. And yes, I will say that since then, I've had two more weight loss journeys. um This is like my second one that I'm going on. I had another one previously.
00:27:44
Speaker
And the second one wasn't fully aligned. Honestly, if I look back at it now, I've done it, but it wasn't from an aligned place. And then obviously I have been on it for the past two years now and I'm fully like shifting a lot of the energetic root causes and doing it the healthier way, um which I'll share about like another day because I'm still on a journey with that, but I've definitely been noticing like the shifts.
00:28:11
Speaker
And so I kept going though, back then I kept going because I was in love with moving my body and how strong I felt. And that was the reason why I kept going and I kept showing up for myself and I manifested my ideal body weight without even realizing it.
00:28:30
Speaker
And so that is what will happen to you when you just keep going and you keep showing up for yourself by cultivating those feelings. of having the thing that you already want, cultivating them first before it even arrives because you have become her.
00:28:44
Speaker
And that's why you keep showing up as her. So to help you stay committed, I want you guys to notice the progress that you're making every single day. Okay. And I want you guys to do this in tiny, tiny ways because usually when we're looking for evidence or when we're looking for like noticing things in our life, we're always going for the big things.
00:29:07
Speaker
But honestly, the way to success is in the small moments, okay? In the small things, in the things that you actually want, like those big goals that you have, they are accumulated through small moments and tiny things throughout the day, each day that add up to that.
00:29:24
Speaker
So notice like... Just you even showing up for the gym. Maybe you're somebody that has been talking about it and talking about it and haven't really been showing up. Just show up at the fucking gym, okay? And if you feel good and you show up at the gym, that's even like a double win.
00:29:37
Speaker
Maybe you take a day off from your work and you let yourself rest up because your body needs it because you need it. And that's like another way of allowing yourself to be the person that gives that to yourself and show up for your commitments even better because you're allowing yourself to get that rest that you need.
00:29:55
Speaker
um Maybe you notice the likes on the post that you posted on Instagram today. And again, the number doesn't matter. Don't get caught up in the number, but just notice like, wow, like if these people were in person, guys, that would be a lot of fucking people.
00:30:12
Speaker
Okay. However, even if it's three likes, it's still three people. it's still It's still three people that... Took the time to look at your content and like your photo. Just take the action of even liking the photo, okay?
00:30:26
Speaker
Find tiny ways in your day-to-day life of how you're getting closer to your goals each day as you continue to show up because this is going to motivate you to keep showing up. This is going to show you why the feelings that you're cultivating now is going to support you in your manifestation and be able to actually hold your commitment and see through it and manifest the things that you want.
00:30:53
Speaker
Just start noticing how every day you're showing up and how your commitments are showing up for you. I will admit guys that in my own journey,
00:31:04
Speaker
I have definitely over committed before and I did this a lot. And while I still showed up for my commitments and I still manifested the things that I wanted and I still made sure I got shit done, it was at the expense of myself.
00:31:18
Speaker
It was at the expense of putting myself last. And because I did that, like I had a lot of resentments and I had a lot of resentments towards myself.
00:31:30
Speaker
Obviously, I may have had resentments towards people because I overcommitted and that was not for them to blame, but for me, because I overcommitted. I put too much more on myself that I didn't need to. I complicated things more than I needed to.
00:31:44
Speaker
That was a big one. And honestly, Even when I was doing all of those things, what really kept me going, even within all of that, was my why.
00:31:55
Speaker
It was me knowing that it was worth it to me and why I wanted it in the first place. Even though it was a lot of outcome-based stuff, it was because my worth was attached to my accomplishments,
00:32:10
Speaker
And that was like a big part of my journey that I've had to, you know, learn from and really start to navigate and shift and heal from. and that made sense to why I was so committed. But I also want you to take inventory. I want you to also ask yourself, like, are a lot of these things that I want?
00:32:28
Speaker
Is it because, you know, my worth is even attached to a lot of these things? Because I'll be real, like a lot of people aren't talking about it, but a lot of people are, you know, it's just the way that America,
00:32:40
Speaker
I mean, if you're not living in America, then great. But a lot of it does happen in America in this capitalistic capital, say that word, capitalistic society, where, you know, we're just driven. And it's great in a way, it's given a sense of opportunity for people, it's given a sense of freedom where we can literally create anything we want for ourselves. But The other end of the stick is also not tying your worth to your ah accomplishments and being committed to your goals because of that.
00:33:13
Speaker
And so every part of my journey obviously is perfect because I wouldn't have had the pull to do things differently if I didn't know. But now, guys, now i focus on simplicity and efficiency like My favorite three love language words are easy, efficient and effortless.
Effortless Commitments and Social Media Approach
00:33:33
Speaker
And so if any of those things are not that, then I'm not fucking doing it, even in my commitments, even in the things that I'm showing up for. It has to be simple. It has to be easy, efficient, effortless, all of those things. And I've really simplified a lot.
00:33:49
Speaker
compared to like back then so i really asked myself those things i'm like how can i make this simple and efficient for me to do because i value my time and energy a lot more than getting that shit done because it's not even going to be well received anyways if i'm just doing things to get it done and then i also i'm working on like reprogramming the whole like doing enough aspect, like the not enough doing enough aspect of like my fate of my existence.
00:34:17
Speaker
And so this way works perfectly for that, because again, I'm like allowing things to be effortless, efficient, simple, easy for me.
00:34:28
Speaker
I also a big part of my work and like my lifestyle and the way i want to live is having fun. Like I really focus on having fun and how like I can infuse fun into everything I do, even if I'm doing things that like aren't quote unquote fun for me, at least is like, for example, doing like back end work for my business.
00:34:50
Speaker
on the computer, like that's not really fun for me, but I make it fun. i I play music in the background while I'm doing it. And I keep reminding myself that it'll be worth it in the long run, that I don't have to keep doing it for the long run either. Like, obviously, I'll outsource that as soon as I'm able to. But I'm making decisions from the end vision, the end goal in mind.
00:35:12
Speaker
And I'm allowing myself to enjoy the process of it and choose how I want to go about it in the process of it. I also allow myself to experiment and see what methods and ways work for me, for like how I run my business that feel good to me.
00:35:28
Speaker
and One of the things that I've been contemplating with social media lately is, um you know, this idea of like me showing up when I feel like it and when I desire to, because I don't want to do anything that I don't want to do, that I don't feel like I have the energy behind for anymore. Like,
00:35:47
Speaker
I was doing a lot of that before, but I don't feel like I want to do that anymore because it doesn't feel good. It doesn't hit the same. I want to feel good about everything that I create and I do. And so even with social media, like there's just this whole like thing about like, you know,
00:36:03
Speaker
in the beginning when you're building your own brand or you're building your own business or your podcast or whatever it is, you know, you got to show up consistently. you got to like, you know, show up and post every day or whatever, how many times you got to post to like be visible.
00:36:16
Speaker
And I'm playing with the idea now of like, I don't want to have to do that though. Like, I don't want to have to keep showing up Even when I don't feel like it and I don't feel like it every day, like every day how I feel changes. And so I want to be able to create my business and my platform and still be able to keep growing.
00:36:34
Speaker
You know, in a way where I get to regardless of whether I show up or not. So I've been like, that's a fun thing that I, you know, look forward to sharing with you guys later on because I'm playing with that idea and belief system myself to see how I can go about creating that.
00:36:52
Speaker
But I'm allowing myself to be flexible even with that idea. Because a lot of people are probably not going to give you that advice when it comes to building your business or your visibility online. They're going to be telling you the opposite. And if you allow yourself to listen to that, you got to ask yourself if that's even an alignment for you.
00:37:08
Speaker
Some people love it. Honestly, I personally don't because I want to have the freedom and flexibility in my life to build my business the way I want to, to show up in the way that I want to. And if I'm going to have a strict commitment like that, then it's going to, um,
00:37:24
Speaker
have a conflict with my values of what is actually like the most important for me. So that's an example i wanted to share. Even my inner work and how I go about it, like my subconscious reprogramming stuff, my inner work stuff that I do, like different tools that I use to go about that.
00:37:42
Speaker
i've been playing around with it more, exploring more passive ways to go about it because your girl just loves it the lazy way. you know, we've done enough here. That's literally been...
00:37:53
Speaker
The highlight of my life. um And the biggest help, honestly, for me has been accessing my intuition. You know, I have been learning emotional mastery and training my intuition skills this past year.
00:38:05
Speaker
And I have learned, okay, the big, big thing that a lot of people... have a hard time differentiating is their emotions and their intuition because they are not the same thing.
00:38:17
Speaker
And this is probably why people give up so easily on their commitments, too, because they allow their emotions, which emotions are not the truth. They're just telling you how you're in misalignment with your true self. They're just telling you like a lot of your limiting beliefs that you're probably unaware of. Your emotions are just feedback, but it's not the truth.
00:38:39
Speaker
OK. And that can cloud your judgment for your goals. And it gets really tricky. I mean, I still find myself double checking with my intuition, especially when I'm emotional. And like sometimes we don't realize how emotional we are.
00:38:54
Speaker
um But when we check in intuitively, like when I do, I know I'm emotional. But sometimes we're just so used to being emotional that we don't realize how emotional we are. And so your emotions can like hold you back from showing up from your commitments and like feeling like you don't want to do something. And this is how I always check in. And um one of the ways that you can tell, like a tangible, practical way that you can tell is like, we're like when it's your emotions versus your intuition is Just recognize if you're continuously putting things off, okay, that you know that you want to show up for and do, then that is your emotions versus if you know something iss going to be the best for you in moving forward towards your goals, and that you will feel better after doing it.
00:39:42
Speaker
then that is your intuition. Okay, so it's two different things. Just pay very close attention. And that is why I'm going to give you guys a tool as well to help you kind of practice and cultivate that knowing for yourself. And there's obviously a lot of ways to go about like tapping into your intuition, whether you're intuitive or not.
00:40:02
Speaker
Everyone has intuition, but I wanted to give you guys like a practical, tangible tool that's proven that can help you kind of get going with this because I don't want you guys to just put off your goals, your desires and everything. I don't want you to put things off because of your emotions when you know that this is a commitment that's worth showing up for and that it's going to be the best thing that you can do and you can keep you know, moving forward from that momentum and keep showing up your commitments, keep cultivating those feelings versus the outcomes and keep showing up for yourself.
00:40:40
Speaker
Also, one more thing I want to mention is that before doing any of this that I'm going to be sharing with you with the tool to make sure that you have neutralized your emotions now.
00:40:51
Speaker
I'm not going to make this a whole fucking masterclass when it comes to emotional mastery and how to go about that. But you know that you have neutralized when you have been able to obviously take yourself away from the situation or whatever that's emotionally charging for you.
00:41:06
Speaker
ground yourself so maybe take a couple of deep breaths to really you know calm down your nervous system and also maybe go for a walk or get some fresh air i personally find that being in nature really helps me ground myself and get clear and then it helps me also start to see the perfection in whatever triggered me or whatever I'm emotional about. It helps me see both sides to everything.
00:41:29
Speaker
And so you always want to make sure that your emotions are neutralized.
Intuition in Decision-Making
00:41:32
Speaker
Otherwise, your emotions can be, again, manipulating your intuition. And obviously, that's not going to help with this.
00:41:39
Speaker
Okay, so This is gonna be something very, very easy that you can implement no matter where you are. And that is why I wanna start you guys off with this little tool with body testing. So body testing has been around for a while. Your body is the best testing tool, one of the best testing tools when it comes to accessing your intuition because your body will always know, it'll always tell you whether something is for you or not.
00:42:05
Speaker
Hence, obviously have not having your emotions like override But this is a very easy way to test with your body to see you know if this is a yes for me, if this is a no for me. We're going to be playing around with yes and no questions. I like to do this because I like to be able to get precise answers and precise answers in a way that obviously are clear because the more clear that you are in the questions that you ask,
00:42:33
Speaker
the more clear answers that you're going to get because everything is everything and there's a thousand ways to go about anything. And so that's why it's important to ask the right questions to get the right answers. So this is what you are going to do.
00:42:48
Speaker
And if you have never tried something like this before, give yourself the permission to try something new and allow yourself to actually go in with the experience and allow it to work. Okay.
00:42:59
Speaker
Because ultimately, if you believe this is not going to work, or this is like something that's too wild, too taboo, too crazy, then it's obviously not going to because your emotions are obviously going to override that with your beliefs backing that up.
00:43:12
Speaker
So just go in with curiosity. You know, that's how I always do things as I go in with curiosity with experimentation with fun. And you never know, like I always say, like, you got to fuck around and find out and that's exactly what you got to do.
00:43:26
Speaker
um But if you are familiar, you know you use your intuition a lot, like you may be familiar with this tool, but it's been very, very helpful. and one of the ways that I use my yes and no body testing methods to check in with my intuition and cross check.
00:43:42
Speaker
So here's what you're gonna do. You always want to make sure that you declare that only source and light are here or whoever you believe in God. you know i always say source.
00:43:53
Speaker
You always declare that only source and light are here and that you only receive answers from source and light only because as we all know or may not know, there's other energies out there. There's other dark energies out there.
00:44:06
Speaker
And so you just want to make sure that you're pulling in information. You're pulling in your yes and no's from your higher self. Okay, so you always want to declare that. Everything is setting an intention. So you just set the intention. You say it out loud.
00:44:20
Speaker
And then you want to stand up straight. Okay, make sure you're standing up straight. And then you want to check in with what your yes and no's look like from your body.
00:44:31
Speaker
And so you want to go in and say, show me my yes, show me my yes, show me my yes. You say it a few times and then watch how your body moves. So for me personally, my body moves forward when it's a yes and my body moves backward when it's a no.
00:44:45
Speaker
So pay attention to what that looks like for you. It could be the same or it could not be. so when you say show me my yes show me my yes your body moves forward that's when you know that's your yes and then you say show me my no show me my no show me my no when it moves backward then you know that's your no so now you have your baseline you're going to ask yourself easy like obvious questions and you want to ask it very neutrally because again you don't want to make sure your emotions are not like manipulating this And so you want to get yourself just feeling very neutral and very clear minded.
00:45:18
Speaker
so where you're not like thinking of anything, you're just allowing your body to move you, you're going to ask yourself basic questions like, I am in California. And you want to also ask them in a way where it's a statement and not a question. So you don't want to ask, am I in California?
00:45:35
Speaker
You want to ask, I am in California, because you want to make sure that you're precise and clear on your question versus like, if you say, am I in California, then there are so many other times where you haven't been in California and that can be coming up. So you want to make sure you're saying like, no, I am California.
00:45:53
Speaker
California. And then it's going to be obviously a yes for me, whatever state that you're in, you can insert that into that question. Then you can ask another question like I am blank years old.
00:46:04
Speaker
And then that those questions, those easy questions are going to help you build more trust with what it looks like. Obviously, ask some no questions, too, um because that's going to help you with like just all it's seeing how yes and no's come up for you.
00:46:19
Speaker
And then i don't want you to ask yourself big questions when you're going to be playing around with this. i want you to then ask a certain question for yourself. And I just want you to then go ahead and do it. So it's going to be like an action thing.
00:46:33
Speaker
So you're going to ask yourself like posting three times a week this week is in my alignment and it's going to make me the happiest. And if you get a yes, I actually want you to take action on that and then so see how you feel by the end of that week.
00:46:49
Speaker
And pay attention to like, was I an in alignment and did I feel happier after I did that? Start little ways. You can do one for the gym, like working out. My legs today will make me feel strong, powerful, will energize me and I will feel happier.
00:47:07
Speaker
And it'll be best for my health and fitness goals. If you get a yes, go ahead and do it and then pay attention to how you feel. I want to leave this with you guys because I want you to start implementing this with your commitments.
00:47:19
Speaker
But I want you to start doing it slowly because you're building up that muscle. You're building up the trust with yourself. i do this in another way. I do it mentally with my intuition and I also do it with my body like yes and no's, which is like more of the advanced way of doing this version.
00:47:36
Speaker
ah want you guys to start here. And let me know, like, let me know how this turns out for you guys. I have been blown away time and time again. Every time I do this, I'm like fascinated because I'm like, wow, like our bodies are so intelligent.
00:47:52
Speaker
And our intuition is always accurate. It's always on point. And this is coming from someone that did not trust herself. did not feel like she could believe in herself in a way where she can trust everything she does.
00:48:04
Speaker
This is coming from somebody that used to get tarot readings all the time and go to other people for answers and like listen to other people versus listening to myself. And now it's the opposite. like Now I'm like, I got my intuition. like I know what's best for me because nobody else will know. And so I'm just going to check in before I do anything. And I will know when I'm doing the thing.
00:48:28
Speaker
how I'm showing up for all my commitments. Like this is the way that I'm moving now. And it's been a game changer because I am proving to myself every time I do this and then I'm following through that. Wow. This stuff works like, wow, I feel such a difference and it's going to motivate you to keep showing up for the commitments that you have.
00:48:49
Speaker
So Try it out and let me know how it goes. Hit me up on Instagram. I want to thank you guys so, so much for tuning in into today's podcast episode. Honestly, it feels so different doing this audio episode versus doing it on video because it just feels like it's flowing more easily for me. I'm allowing myself to not get distracted by the video and just let everything out that I want to let out and just speak more authentically in the way that I do.
00:49:21
Speaker
Reach out to me on Instagram. My Instagram is Darsh Vibes with a double S, D-A-R-S-H-V-I-B-E-S-S. Hit me up. I want to know. I want to hear from you.
00:49:33
Speaker
And let me know if you have any like ah topics that you want me to talk about, anything that's on your mind that you want more clarity on, that you want me to touch upon, you want me to share. i am an open book and I am also limitless in the sense of like, I am not afraid to talk about whatever topics that you guys have in mind.
00:49:52
Speaker
They can be cringe. They can be super controversial. They can be relatable. They can be whatever. Whatever's on your mind, I'm willing to talk about it. Of course, as long as it feels in alignment with me too, of course, which I feel like if you guys follow me, obviously we have some type of resonance with each other.
00:50:11
Speaker
Make sure that you subscribe to this podcast and also share this podcast episode with anyone else that you feel like can relate to this episode and what we talked about. And anyone else that's on this journey of self-growth and self-worth and self-love,
00:50:26
Speaker
All the things that has to do with becoming the best version of yourself and doing it in a way that feels good, that feels in alignment with yourself and and on your terms, honestly, because that's what we're doing here. We're not following what people do. We're not following what society says.
00:50:42
Speaker
We are following ourselves. We are doing things on our own terms. And so if that resonates with you, if you are open and willing to do things in new ways that may not have been done before and you know of others or your friends or whoever that feels the same way that can benefit from this, please share this episode with them.
00:51:02
Speaker
It helps them and it helps me spread the message out even farther and help more people. Also rate this podcast five stars because da I will catch you guys in the next episode.
00:51:16
Speaker
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