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Ep 139: Perdita Durango (Listener Request Month)
52 Plays11 days ago
We kick off our first ever Listener Request Month with this one from Ashley, 1997's PERDITA DURANGO (aka Dance With The Devil) from director Alex de la Iglesia and starring Rosie Perez and Javier Bardem. Ashley described it as "if David Lynch and Tarantino had dirty, sexy Tucson baby," and boy, was she right! Murder, mayhem, santeria, an 18-wheeler full of fetuses, James Gandolfini, Screamin' Jay Hawkins, kidnapping and sex. Lots of sex. This is some straight-up madness and we get all the way into it on this episode!
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Transcript
Introduction and Listener Request Month
00:00:00
Speaker
He's a big old peder-ass. He's a peder-ass dude. Eight-year-olds. Welcome back, guys, to Bad Movies, Worst People. This week, it's the beginning of Listener Request Month, and we're watching, we're talking about, we already watched, Perdita Durango. Or Dance with the Devil, depending where you find this. perrita I'm Derek. I'm Whitney. I'm Ashley. I'm Jack. This is Bad Movies, Worst People.
00:01:00
Speaker
I couldn't say it, so I gave up. Yep. That's the way to do it, though. It's like in life. That's why I stopped playing the synthesizer.
Personal Anecdotes and Synthesizers
00:01:10
Speaker
That's why you stopped playing with the synthesizer? Yeah, I never could play a synthesizer. Wow. Because i what am I going to do? Ask for a synthesizer case? like i just I sound ridiculous i mean, 3C has had one.
00:01:21
Speaker
Yeah, it's true, but he can say synthesizer.
00:01:26
Speaker
I love you. We are talking about Perdita Durango. It was requested by Ashley, who's with us today. Hi. And I have a golf clap for Ashley. Golf clap. Thank you for having me. I'm so excited to be here.
00:01:40
Speaker
Yeah, this was a long ah request like a long time ago that we wanted to put in for our Arizona birth month, but we just, we had a a scheduling thing and I'm glad we saved it. We went on a cruise. we were gone for like Well, wasn't just that. We had a couple of requests. So I was like, let's do a listener request month. Yeah, and I'm glad we saved it and I'm glad you watched it with us because this was, I'm spoil my recommendations. This was really fun.
00:02:01
Speaker
This was awesome, dude. It was definitely all the fun. Yeah, Javier Bardem with Betty Page bangs and Rosie Perez has the same hair. Yes. There's Betty Page Bangs, but it's like a bad wig. It's like it doesn't quite fit. He got a kid's wig.
00:02:14
Speaker
yeah We have the small. It's okay. I'll take it. And then James Gandolfini's. James Gandolfini's. Skinny version. Skinny to Feenies. Yeah. And we all know what that means, ladies.
00:02:25
Speaker
Oh my goodness. Yeah. yeah And we're into it. These two chicks were so thirsty for skinny Gandolfini. Which, hey I get it. The ladies at home understand. Yeah. The guys here do too.
00:02:37
Speaker
ah Ashley and I met, what, ah two Christmases ago. Yeah. Yes, at a party that Jack hosted. And we were instantaneous best friends. Yes, we get along quite well. Some might say swimmingly. Yeah.
Insights on Perdita Durango
00:02:50
Speaker
swimming Quite swimmingly. Quite swimmingly. We are the same person. Today was no exception. yeah I almost think in a year or two from now, we could redo this as commentary. Yes. Because the story is bonkers in general. It is super. Yeah, these these notes are a fucking mess. Do you still have the email that Ashley wrote?
00:03:06
Speaker
I have the email. Oh my gosh, I don't even remember. It depends a lot. She's here, so I figured she could just it. Oh no, the description she has for this movie. So in our text, she she gave me a couple actor-actresses and yada yada, but the the thing that got me was, it's like David Lynch and Quentin Tarantino had a dirty, sexy Tucson baby. yeahp It's true. And I was like, yeah, i gave that let's watch. but That's exactly what it was. And it's true. And it's also not bad.
00:03:31
Speaker
No, it's not bad. And the people deserve to know and the people deserve to have an opportunity to, you know, enjoy the art. Well, good news is I'm to a bit of Derek's job. I found this on Prime. Nice. But you have to do the Spanish title ah Perdita Durango.
00:03:47
Speaker
Yes. Or you can buy this sweet-ass copy, maybe. i didn't look. It's still available. That actually has this 4K from Severin. He's so jealous right I am. He is so fucking jealous. I just got it on Amazon. i just Every couple years i would look for it and it finally got put out. and that i could you know Because i you know it was... ah So we were talking, Ashley and I were talking briefly before we got here that apparently this didn't have even like an IMDb presence for a while. Oh, really? it was just this limbo movie yeah that you had seen when you were 12 years old. Wow. Starting to make sense of my friend here. Yeah, all I was an only child and I had unrestricted access to the the the premium movie channels. Did you have a black box also growing No, we didn't have a black box, but we we didn't get cable until I was like in fifth grade or so until I was like 10. And then it just, I let her rip.
00:04:36
Speaker
I let her rip. Mama's gonna have her some box in there. I would say I was like about eight years old when my parents got the black box. Yeah, i had a couple, like, long... Too young for that. Yeah, my friends had the black... Some of my friends had the black box. Channel 28 was my go-to channel. with That's the Spice. If you know, you know. Is that scrambled? I had the scrambled.
00:04:55
Speaker
I think I see a nipple. I just can't tell if it's mut male or female. But you could hear all the going to risk Yeah. I'm fine with that. Yeah, ASMR's a big thing now. Back then, I needed a plot. I'm like, but why is he there to fix the cable? don't need plot. I just need...
00:05:10
Speaker
The sound of mine. husband. You need plop. You need plop. Yeah. I was young and it was on the movie channels and I just thought it was, mean, because it really is probably one of the more wild things that you could view. Yeah. You get penis in this. There's lot going on. You almost get Rosie Perez's vagina. Yeah, you get lot of Close enough. You get a lot of stuff here. It's almost better you didn't get it.
00:05:32
Speaker
I like not seeing it. I like how tasteful that was. Like boobs, everybody's got Keeps you wanting. Even guys have boobs. I try not to. I want to suck on them all. Whoa. As I did this, your wife's like, I want to suck them all. Yikes.
00:05:46
Speaker
Calm down, neck down, panel. Whenever you do me... Whoa. Whenever you do my impersonation, I'm a valley girl? Yeah. Okay. that's No, not always. It's just...
00:05:58
Speaker
I'm just a little misogynistic. I'm a little Valley girl. It's fine. anyone that actually knows me knows that I am not the one in charge when it comes to women. you're more of a feminist than I am. i If I believe in being an ist at all, yes. Yeah. You know, he's a good guy. The end.
00:06:12
Speaker
Husband's just like, all right, guys done? feel this is about to turn into a dating show. My friend Jack here, he actually loves women. He's often used as a doormat in his life. If you come home from a hard day at work, wipe your feet on him and have him make you Now we're going to need to get footage of you on a horse so I can put it in slow motion and we can just make it your dating video. Or make him a centaur.
00:06:31
Speaker
I'm not getting on a horse. He is the horse. With the dick of a camel. ah so This movie was directed by Alex...
Casting and Production Insights
00:06:40
Speaker
It's going to be a long one, dude. Alex de la Iglesia. I didn't direct anything I think anybody here would recognize other than this. I did a movie I've heard of, Accion Mutante. Okay. Mutant action.
00:06:52
Speaker
That's all I know about it. Yeah. And it came out in 1993. And it also has Javier Bardem, I believe. Is that part of the three-pack you were talking about? I think so. You know that one guy from that one movie where he had like the weird haircut? I would truly watch anything that he made because he ah directed this and wrote it, I believe.
00:07:09
Speaker
writer yeah Writer and director. and He was a writer. There's a couple, but there were people he wrote with before. right And then the the guy who wrote the book also helped write the script. 59 degrees in rating. Which also, fun fact that you mentioned earlier,
00:07:23
Speaker
Go ahead. Mention it again, pal. Say it again. It's Barry Gifford who wrote the novel that Wild at Heart is based on as well. Fuck. Christian Slater movie? No, Nicolas Cage. My snake skin jacket represents my freedom. Yeah, and Laura Dern. And Willem Dafoe. What's the Christian Slater movie I'm thinking about? You're thinking of ah you' know True Romance. Another fan fantastic. I like how we all got there. yeah said Cleaning the Cube. You said what? Cleaning the Cube.
00:07:50
Speaker
Are you talking about cuffs? Nobody here knows that movie. I can tell by everybody's reaction. But yes, Barry Gifford, he wrote this ah book and he also wrote the screenplay for Last Highway. So he got along with it. There's your Lynchian thing. I'll cry with you. We'll circle back.
00:08:11
Speaker
But there's ah apparently eight novellas in this series, so you guys got some reading to do. ah it's I'm illiterate. 624 pages total. but That's why you couldn't find it on IMDb. I can't read. She couldn't get to IMDb.
00:08:24
Speaker
I can't type or read. right. You guys think this movie made any money? No. What was the budget? Budget was $6 million. $13.5. love it. much happened.
00:08:35
Speaker
Think about this. It made like $9 million because I don't think this got a big fucking release. No, it couldn't have. You know more than I do about this movie that I love. Three million. You think it made three million?
00:08:47
Speaker
American? Are we talking international box? We'll combine it worldwide. You said 13? No, budget was 13. I'm saying nine. Okay, I'm going to say 9.1.
00:08:58
Speaker
nine point one No.
00:09:01
Speaker
I'm going to say 9.5. nine five Oh, see, she kind of did it. so I mean, she still did it. well She made a joke about You know, I'm really terrible at all this. Go on. I'm bad at all that. I'm really bad. And I'm trying to think, like, are we talking about asses and seats? No, dollars. Just dollars. what? By the way, I've won like one of these.
00:09:18
Speaker
I'm going to say like six million dollars. It should have made all the money. Oh, it should make money now. It almost made its budget back. All right. 11.5. Oh, nice. Two million short. But I don't, I think what I read was that it did not get an American release.
00:09:32
Speaker
win. Right, I just saw, I think I saw it on Starz or something. And then it was out of print, they had it. And then it was out of print. I couldn't find it. It was probably Cinemax. Got fucking premium cable. probably was, but I feel like it had more of plot than Cinemax. Yeah, it was right before Skinemax started. So this is the first time you watched your 4K version?
00:09:50
Speaker
Very much the first time. And there were a couple things that were added in that you're like, oh, it's like a director's cut or something. Yeah, and I think it did have a little bit longer. Like the close-up of a fetus. Yeah, fetus. and then um And then in the beginning when he's looking at the CDs and you can see her, Rosie Perez's face is reflected back while she's sitting in that little chair. Yeah, oh that was pretty tough. That i didn't I didn't notice that little detalle because I was watching it on a tube television and I've seen it very many times, but not since, not you know, I'm a mother Not since the invention of 4K. Yeah, Yeah. which Jack is really big on, and and i and I'm getting there. Yeah, I love the 4K. I feel like this may have made me feel better, ah more interested in 4K than I otherwise would be. This is great purchase. I'm going to spoil it, though. There are going some movies like, shouldn't have seen that in 4K.
00:10:34
Speaker
You start seeing, like, the wires and the stunts. Well, like in this one, where you see the guy with his arm up in his sleeve. Yeah, he was missing an arm, and then in one shot, he's walking away, and you can see that it's fully just his arm. He's like a four-year-old. is grabbing his boob, one grabbing Is he scratching his nipple? Can you see me doing it? Stop scratching your nipple on your shirt.
00:10:52
Speaker
It was great. Yeah. But originally, this wasn't supposed to be Rosie Perez. Oh. Perdita Durango. This is one
Plot and Thematic Exploration
00:11:00
Speaker
our favorites. So, real quick, side thing. Marissa Tomei. The same character was in Wild at Heart. It was played by Isabella Rosalini.
00:11:07
Speaker
But this movie started with a different director, and there was a different person supposed to play... pradita and a different person who was supposed to play James Gandolfini's character.
00:11:18
Speaker
it that guy from No Country for Old Men? That's the movie that I was trying to yeah It was the bangs. you The guy with the hair. Was it Sam Elliott?
00:11:29
Speaker
No. well no I have no... Okay, so are we talking... Is he Spanish or Hispanic? These ones are not. So these are American folk? Is it Gina Davis and... Gary Busey. Yeah, Gina Davis and Gary Busey. That would be fucking awesome. I'm gonna catch that sucker across the border no matter what happens. Hey, while we're here, could we get some of that sticky, sticky candy? I like when it gets inside of my teeth. It would have been nearly as crazy as the Gary Busey, though.
00:11:52
Speaker
Dennis Hopper was supposed to play that character. Oh, man, we got to get him before he gets across the fucking border. And Madonna was supposed to play Perdita. See, it wouldn't have worked. That would not work. i like It wouldn't have worked.
00:12:03
Speaker
No. den is Dennis Hopper could be whatever he wants. Madonna, no. No, thank you. I love Madonna. Unless it's Madonna now where she looks like a monster. And then it got changed again.
00:12:14
Speaker
And then all three people changed. So the partito was supposed to be played by a woman. You guys wouldn't know. Someone in Victoria Abril. I looked at her. so it's Victoria Abril. Are you being a real right now? It's all like Spanish. Let me show you my tattoo of her.
00:12:27
Speaker
yeah I don't have one. I was waiting. Bluff called. But Romeo and Gandolfini changed again. Okay. So what do you guys think on that one? Romeo and... Romeo with those bangs was played by Marky Mark.
00:12:47
Speaker
Machete. Oh, you're so close. Am I close with Marky Mark? you mar I mean, kind of. Johnny Depp. Oh, yeah. See, that wouldn't have worked for me either. No, because he's going to come out doing his fear and loathing thing the whole fucking time. Yeah, no. Don't you love that? Like in Labyrinth, where it was supposed to be Michael Jackson.
00:13:02
Speaker
Pardon? But then they felt they they were scared the kids wouldn't be able to get out of the maze while he was in it. They're like, it got real. And then the alternate for Gandolfini? I like Nick Cage. Liz Gow.
00:13:15
Speaker
Ray Liotta. Okay. Wow. That's a formidable opponent on that one. That is a ah parallel move. That is a parallel move. that And why'd they drop out? Was it scheduling or were they just not interested in the fetus truck? Madonna dropped out of the first one. What the is the fetus truck in the script?
00:13:31
Speaker
Madonna decided not to do the first one and then and then they recast people and for some reason they changed everybody. Money maybe. they don't They're like, we don't have Madonna, let's get Johnny Depp. Yeah. And then the director the director changed and that's why everybody changed again. 97? What's Johnny Depp doing in 97? Crybaby. Besides jars of cocaine. Crybaby, right?
00:13:50
Speaker
Am I way off base there, Tom? No, you're not way off base. I feel like it's a little earlier, but you probably would know better than do. I might. I'm bad with numbers and words. I don't know. Her email said that this came out in 1995. Fear and loathing.
00:14:02
Speaker
That's what he was doing. Sorry, brother. Well, it didn't get American release until 1997. I don't know. I can't be familiar. Oh, your honor. It did in fact have a release in 1997. There was no website information on this film. ah No, that's pretty much everything I got.
00:14:18
Speaker
Yeah. It's crazy. It's fucking so fun. I mean, it's mostly no lols. Like, lols, yes. Lols in the script, in the scene, no.
00:14:29
Speaker
yeah And when it is, it's because they're fucking... It's very similar to Wild at Heart, just like this person is a little bit crazier than David Lynch in a different way. Yeah. Yeah. errors Yeah.
00:14:42
Speaker
He's looking more at like the subtext and this guy's just like, no, but fuck it and cocaine and murder. Yeah. This guy, at one point we see Harvey Arbardin motorboat a bag of cocaine. Yeah. And then he throws it on the ground. Well, when you got that much cocaine, I mean.
00:14:55
Speaker
He just threw it. mean, look look how they're going. But bag was It didn't empty. it only You probably lost like
Visuals and Director's Style
00:15:00
Speaker
a couple grand. um Look how they're going through cigarettes. Light, puff, another one. Yeah, Rosie Perez probably needs to look into like her contract from that film because there had to have been some sort of clause.
00:15:11
Speaker
That's why she kept lighting a new one. She wasn't she was just like doing that first puff but just blowing it out and then not smoking it and then flicking it. But they were also like light 120. They were like 120. She only likes that first hit, though. It's a Cadillac of cigarettes, dude. And a chain steering wheel, you guys.
00:15:25
Speaker
Ooh, not in Tucson, though. and Today was 100 degrees out. Fucking grab a chain steering wheel. know. Happy Easter, not even yet. Happy second Jesus birthday. Sorry, your party sucks. but So the movie starts with a naked Rosie Perez. Yeah. Playing Perdita Durango. Rosie Perez, white man can't jump.
00:15:41
Speaker
um Pineapple Express. Do the right thing. Fly Girls. Fly Girls. She was a Fly Girl. was she just in that we watched? Oh, Birds of Prey. She's there and she's good. Oh, I'm not watching that. It was really good. Don't push that on me. I don't know what that is. It's one of the Harley Quinn spin-off. It's a Harley Quinn spin-off thing, but it was actually really good. I'm sure it was.
00:15:59
Speaker
It was. So a voice acting? We'll just do it for superhero. No, it's a live action one. Oh, it's live action. Yeah. okay I'll just make you do it for superhero one. Because they wanted to torture your eyes and your ears. And your balls. That's actually good. Balls are already tortured. Joke's on you. I'm a a recovering Catholic. She's having this nightmare about a jaguar licking her.
00:16:14
Speaker
and My bad. It might not be a nightmare. The way she wakes up, it feels like a nightmare. If you're not scared, you ain't doing it right. you't You always wake up screaming? Yeah. Yeah. It's like, ah, my alarm.
00:16:25
Speaker
Good morning. How's everybody doing? We have to get to work. Have a good day. It's the screaming sun from the show that you never watched. Which show that I've ever watched? Rick and Morty. Oh. Oh, yeah. Show me what you
00:16:41
Speaker
i've but I've seen some of it. I've never seen. I've never liked an episode. and I feel like Andy Richter right now. I'm just like leaning. like, So, guests. It could be worse, dude. You could be Paul Schaefer.
00:16:53
Speaker
no. Play a little song here for you. Podcast music. Podcast music. It's podcast music. Everybody's looking at my weird glasses. Yeah.
00:17:05
Speaker
But less funny, her sister's husband killed her sister. Yeah. It's kind of funny. And their children. Children first, dude. And then the mom watch. Yeah. Yeah. so that's what we learned in this joyful scene at the beginning. Yeah. She's a crazy person because she's like, you want to see my sister?
00:17:21
Speaker
Open the fucking jar. Yeah. to And then she does like this. Were they actually holding her up or were they just begging and being funny? Because they had a like a they had a gun. Shaky jar of change. And they had a shaky hand holding a pistola. Was it a real gun, though?
00:17:37
Speaker
Well, I don't know. Rosie Perez didn't seem to care or her character didn't seem to care very much. Like, I'm going to freak these little girls out. And they you think you think you're tough. Listen to my story. yeah I was once man to Woody Harrelson thought he was good at basketball. No, that's a horror story. I would tell him he was good at basketball if you're out there. You're really shaggy you're good at it But you guys are going to have to help me along during this one because these notes are just.
00:18:01
Speaker
Well, I'll do what I can. The plot is scattered all over the place. um She dumps her sister's ashes at the graveyard and sees Javier Bardem stealing bodies. That's pretty cool. Well, it's one body, dude.
00:18:13
Speaker
Okay, fair. He only needs the one right now. yeah This guy has the biggest dick energy. He really does. It's not just his mullet. It's not just his leather pants. It's not just his black trench coat. It's not just his sexy face. It's also his big dick.
00:18:27
Speaker
Yeah. The Riz. he went on to play God in that movie Mother. The Riz in that. That was such a good movie. We saw that in theaters, and I still remember that movie to the same. I saw that fully pregnant.
00:18:39
Speaker
I have a kid, and I saw that movie full pregnant, and I was like, uh-oh, this isn't a good movie to watch while you're fully pregnant. and I shouldn't have pregnant. Well, see, because now I'm a lifelong Javier Bardem fan. ah Huge, by the way. well because he is With that hair?
00:18:53
Speaker
Any hair. what That's my first reckoning. He's super intimidating. Dumb hair. yeah No country for old men. Worse hair. Much worse hair much more intimidating. So the worse his hair gets, the scarier he is. Okay. But he was in that one Pirates of the Caribbean movie. Not scary.
00:19:10
Speaker
The 17th one? Because he had hair. I don't know. I think it was 17th or 18th. Between 17 and 40. Can I blow your mind for a minute? Pirates of the Caribbean. Are we still doing this? Yeah. That's the new one.
00:19:21
Speaker
I've never seen Country for Old Men. oh How about No Country for Old Men? Oh, well, you know, the crazy coincidence, just today, No Country for Old Men came in 4K, so... Hey! You watch my glorious Criterion Collection edition.
00:19:35
Speaker
I'm gonna cry some tears in your collection. 50% off sale, man. Yeah, I was like, don't come for me on 50% off on the Criterion channel. I have to call my husband and say, honey. Can I get the Criterion?
00:19:50
Speaker
Let's say it's over 50% off. Can I get the Criterion? Yeah. Little lord me. We're married. Okay. I only do it if I can afford it. I can.
Character Dynamics and Standout Scenes
00:20:00
Speaker
It's been years since I bought a Criterion film, but the last time I did was on one of the glorious 50% off sales. twice year Smart. I didn't even know what it was. March and October.
00:20:09
Speaker
March in October? Like I have to get up in October and start marching? March and October. 50% off sales. Because October's a long way away, but I wouldn't be able to train for it. He's got all this disposable income. I want you to buy me something. I'll buy you something. What you want, girl?
00:20:24
Speaker
You want fucking cheeseburger? Shit. yeah She meets Javier. Yes?
00:20:31
Speaker
Rosie Perez meets Javier Bardem. Yeah, well, he enforces that issue. Yes, he does. I love it just starts and he's just... He walks up like a snag. He doesn't even pretend to do it. He's like... Did you know I'm a wizard? My mom was a witch. My dad was a Spaniard. i love Santoria and I'm a scientist.
00:20:46
Speaker
Okay. And she's like... Right. Sure. I never saw the science part. i I think the Santeria is part science, part religion. His science is if I cut off a dead body's right arm and put in this blood water and drink it, I get a strong right arm.
00:21:03
Speaker
Fair. Science, bitch. Okay. all And he is strong. I mean, hey, is one plus one equals question marks. Yeah. Dead body plus live body equals blood punch. Yep. I like your math. Thank you. Me too.
00:21:14
Speaker
Also, there might be some meth involved in this. Like, not us, but them. It's a very meth vibe that you get from a lot of the stuff happening. Well, we are Tucson and Mexico. Listen, do the people home know where you guys based your podcast from?
00:21:27
Speaker
Yes. Good! 1997 Tucson, Arizona. Meth was abundant. Yeah, that's when I... Yes, it was. And it is also That's when I started the program called D.A.R.E. yeah Weird, because i was in those classes in elementary school. I was daring kids to buy drugs off me. Yep.
00:21:43
Speaker
I dare you. I dare you to buy drugs off me. My favorite thing is about those dare things was that I thought for sure people were going to have to convince me to do drugs. I just picked them up on my own. was like, i' these things sell themselves.
00:21:53
Speaker
We get to see Javier Bardem rob a bank wearing a Santo mask, which he even tells the guy. And I've got Santo. I was going to say, this is important to Derek. I don't know if you know this cat. No, I know that it was a luchador. was luchador that ended up doing a bunch of movies. There was there was a comic book series based on him. Sorry to interrupt. Is he the guy that did all of the philanthropy work there? is that the I'm not sure. Oh, that would be awesome if it was.
00:22:17
Speaker
And i by the way, you're going have to interrupt on this podcast. Oh, okay, good. you're gonna I just know he was um he was a real he was a wrestler yeah who then got comic books, movies. That one's probably one of the weakest. He plays like a James Bond in that, but the rest of the movies, he's just a James Bond that doesn't take office. That's pretty incredible. See, I did not ever catch that or know what he was talking about. No joke.
00:22:36
Speaker
He goes into like a James Bond like secret meeting type of thing just wearing the mask. um No one recognizes. like That's the guy that never takes his mask off. That's that's Santo. We should watch it.
00:22:46
Speaker
Nah, we'll talk later. Okay.
00:22:50
Speaker
well that's incredible that you do that they're fucking like we can tell right away they're gonna fuck oh yeah raw the way she's sucking the straw out of a coke bottle wish I was a straw can we just talk about just real quick that they are both in like their physical prime yes not that either of them ever got ugoed No, no, you're you're not wrong, though. Like, this is probably the best I've ever seen her look, and she's looked great her whole life. Yeah, she's fine. This is definitely my favorite look for him. I'm making fun of his hair, but he fucking rocks it.
00:23:17
Speaker
It's hard. Like, it's if I knew this person in real life, I would probably die from ripping on his hair, and he kills me by stabbing me the face with tequila bottles. He's a fan of that. by But he's rocking it.
00:23:29
Speaker
Yeah. So it's a flashback. I mean, it looks a lot like Hector's hair without the curls. Not anymore. Hector doesn't have it anymore. Hector had fancy mullet, though. A friend of ours. Oh, hell yeah. All mullets look like this.
00:23:41
Speaker
Sweet.
00:23:44
Speaker
But yeah, they're going to fuck. And he's telling her. i don't know if he's telling her the story if they're just showing us. He's like, I've got some money. I had a meeting on this side of the border today. I feel like he's telling her. This flashback that we're watching is her seeing it in my mind. Because later in the movie, she's like, oh, your date was ah to rob a bank.
00:24:00
Speaker
That's the date you had the gu to go to. You're going to take it without asking. She's taking it without asking. He's got this ah cohort who I believe is is this guy. The character's name is Shorty D.
00:24:12
Speaker
The actor is Santiago Segura, and he is he's a he was in Hellboy, Blade 2, Beyond Reanimator, which I know you guys have seen. I've seen that. All right, see? High five. Yeah. Dude, I the DVDs. I knew her and Whitney were going to make friends, but keep keep talking about Criterion and Reanimator.
00:24:32
Speaker
Ashley's moving in. yeah you got Can I just sleep by this big DVD rack you got here? I might need to move into your house. I want to sleep behind the glow of that cool TV light you have.
00:24:47
Speaker
um Oh, he does make a girl pull her boobs out. Oh, dude. While he's robbing the bank. He's got his priorities. Puffy nipples. I mean, he's just like, he's like, take it take it off. Oh, good God. he's robbing a bank in a luchador mask um that I now know
Cultural Influences and Film References
00:25:00
Speaker
is a reference to this amazing legend. Yeah, and he's like,
00:25:06
Speaker
but before Before I go. I was trying to remember what he said in Spanish. I'm not good at it. Yeah, he's like, let me see them tits. And she's like, eh. And he's like, oh, yeah. Como se dice, let me see them tits.
00:25:18
Speaker
Yeah, it was like that. I was trying to, thought I going to be cool. It work. Como se dice, ahuga, ahuga. Como se dice, best tits of the day. Yeah. That's pretty impressive. Because you're like, you're on a timer when you're robbing a bank. There were a lot of people in there, his buddy knows. He's getting off on that, too.
00:25:33
Speaker
I love that he walks out of the bank because he's like, and mask off. All right. There's no way there's cameras out here. Walk. Well, no. And then he's just walking. He's not looking suspicious. And then the cops drive by and he sees this hot lady. He just starts making out with her.
00:25:46
Speaker
And they're like, oh, just two people fucking on the sidewalk. It's fine. And when he gives her the mask of center. Yeah. and He says it gives you it gives you blessings. He's got herpes. This this guy's got... The way he's kissing like Richard Dawson. This guy's kissing like Richard Dawson. What do we say? He is kissing grannies and dropping little girl panties. all of Richard Dawson. I don't know who Dawson is.
00:26:09
Speaker
The Family Feud host that wanted to kiss That was... The family feud, not Price is right. Touching her little... Oh, show me. That's what I was thinking. Show me potato salad. Give us a here. Before go on stage, let me see your butthole. Thank you. Whip out your titties. That's the one there. So he's Richard Dawson. He's like, thank you for letting rob this bank. Let me see them titties. Yeah.
00:26:30
Speaker
Before I leave. Speaking of Richard Dawson, we find out they're robbing the bank so they can pay off this guy who wants to make a belt out of their nipples. Yes. And my phone. Is that a Richard Dawson thing? I don't know.
00:26:41
Speaker
My phone autocorrected it to Ripples. A belt out of their Ripples. Give me the comedian Don Ripples. ah A nipple belt. How Ed Gein of you.
00:26:52
Speaker
yeah i think his was ah vagina parts, though. Yeah. Lampshades. Coochie lampshades. ah Come on down and get your coochie lampshades. This one smells funny you turn it on.
00:27:03
Speaker
And he's like telling her the story and about his history and Santeria and all this stuff. And then just tells a story about two cars crashing, I guess, so we can just have an explosion. I love it. I'm in for an explosion. Was the last two cars on the island or something? Yeah, where he grew There was only two cars. because it was three miles one way and one mile the other way in this little island.
00:27:23
Speaker
They are the cars. This is their relationship. They were always meant to bang into each other and blow up. That's fair. I didn't think that deep about any moments this movie. I just like the way you said it. Okay. Well, because there was no reason to show it except for that.
00:27:37
Speaker
And they got to make two classic cars explode. oh yeah. These are lead sleds. Old fucking 30s mercs. Yeah, they were gorgeous. It pretty cool. The badabooms are goodness. Yeah. And he's he's telling you the story to get to the Santeria, right? So he's doing his his stuff.
00:27:52
Speaker
Santeria is like a Spanish voodoo. Santeria is a mix of Catholicism and voodoo. Yes. And so is hoodoo, which is a whole different thing. I won't get into it.
00:28:02
Speaker
It's not just a sublime song. It's not. It's a real it's a real thing. and and and not It's as real as all those other religions. Right. Not if you watch this movie. I mean, it's more real. It's a lot more real.
00:28:15
Speaker
But to ah summon the whatever he's trying to fucking do here, how you are done does Jack's favorite thing in the whole movie. He cuts open a bag of cocaine. Stuffs it in his face.
00:28:26
Speaker
motor both shit It that shit. Comes out just all, Scarface ain't got shit on me. Oh man, my heart's gonna explode. Oh boy. No, I'm back. That's why he threw it on the ground afterwards. Because he's like, I'm gonna do this because it looks cool, but it anymore. I do like there's an audible gasp from the crowd like, is he just gonna waste that cocaine? Yeah. We can get that out there, right? Dibs on the floor, cocaine. I got it. No problem. Yeah, it was a lot of cocaine. I'm grabbing that bag. I'll get the cocaine.
00:28:51
Speaker
And we've got Harvey O'Brien's sidekick buddy, Screamin' Jay Hawkins playing Adolfo. Nope. Screamin' Jay Hawkins. Oh, he's Screamin' Jay Hawkins. This movie is having a competition to have the deepest voice ever.
00:29:05
Speaker
in cinema. Dude, I always thought Javier Bardem's voice was deep. It it is. Screamin' J is just like, a ro where You are not wrong. Javier Bardem's Yeah, makes him sound like a soprano next to Screamin' J. Dude, Javier Bardem is fucking low and slow, and then this guy comes up like, oh ha You know nothing of deepness. It's like you and me talking, and I'm Javier. And I'm Screamin' J Hawkins. It's a real low register. For those who are like me and don't know who Screamin' J Hawkins is, put a spell on you.
00:29:33
Speaker
The original person to sing it. Well, yeah the one who made it big. I don't know if he was the original. Everybody did covers back then. The one that made it big was a woman. And then... Once again, men getting things taken away from from by women. Welcome back to Lawncast. Ugh.
00:29:51
Speaker
Welcome back to Chadcast. And then Marilyn Manson did it too for the Lost Highway soundtrack. Anybody? and Yes. Anybody Lost Highway? Yeah. Anybody like that? Me. I do too. Got it in
Merchandise and Pop Culture Impact
00:30:00
Speaker
4K. Of course you do. course you do.
00:30:02
Speaker
I have it on splatter vinyl. I don't know what that means, but it sounds gross. I first pushed up my imaginary glasses. I think I have splatter vinyl at home. It's a really tight catsuit.
00:30:13
Speaker
Hey, guys. I don't want to sound needy here. I'm needy. But we have a Patreon at patreon.com slash first people. Mm-hmm. And it only costs $3 a month. $3 a month is nothing. And I know times are hard right now. Real hard for me.
00:30:27
Speaker
Inflation's up. You can't afford your groceries. Can't eat. But you can't afford $3 a month if you love us. Give us $3. Super love us. Please love us. we're not We're not begging. I'm begging.
00:30:38
Speaker
We're not pleading. I'm pleading. We're not down on our knees. Oh, boy. mean my My knees hurt. They've been on it on so long. But we do kind of need the money. I need the money bad. We need new equipment.
00:30:50
Speaker
new equipment we need to do remote podcasts for all of you wouldn't mind eating we need to have video i wouldn't mind eating uh we need more drinks food sounds good so please check out patreon.com slash worst people please check us out we meet now mr satisfy herb satisfy write another name herb satisfy know right herbs herbs always satisfy me ah Write another name because Mr. Satisfy sounds like you are a ripoff of Mr. Clean. Yes. Or a really bad ah like sex toy line.
00:31:25
Speaker
Have you tried your Mr. Satisfy? He's got five speeds. I never caught that. But this guy is played by someone who we've had on the podcast previously and will have again in the future. And I'm assuming nothing rolls. I looked at the names and didn't recognize them. Right.
00:31:38
Speaker
ah This is Roger Cudney, who, by the way, passed away 2021. Best pictures. Best in pictures some pictures. He's in Rambo 2, Remo Williams, The Adventure Begins. Oh, so he's Welcome Back twice. Yeah.
00:31:50
Speaker
And he's also in The Arrival, which we have not done yet. The Charlie Sheen one? The Charlie Sheen one. The Arrival. boy. Which person are we talking about? Mr. Herb Satisfied. Oh, Herb Satisfied.
00:32:02
Speaker
He looks like a cross between- Acela's dad. Sid Caesar, the old comedian who none of you going to know, and Robert Stack. Yeah. He just looks like a sunburned white gold dude. He's got an unsolved mystery. Where's my daughter? Yeah, plastic on the furniture, that whole thing. oh He's a little creepy, too.
00:32:19
Speaker
He's a lot of creepy. He's just like, hey, son, i know you're taking my daughter out to banger today, but remember this. Always be in control. I don't want you coming early. My daughter deserves the best. Is that me as a man?
00:32:30
Speaker
No, this is you as a man. This is me as a man. Not a good way. Whitney's got a bigger set of balls than I do. mean, no. And we have Dwayne and Estelle. Estelle is... Dwayne. Herb satisfies daughter.
00:32:42
Speaker
Dwayne's one of my new favorite criers. Yeah. hey he is i'm not I'm not the guy that gets off on crying. Ever. He is just fucking great at it. Well, these guys are in another movie together.
00:32:52
Speaker
That's something I've never seen. Estelita and Juanito? Is it something gross? it's ah No, it's ah Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th. Yes! So it's not even good enough to be a scary movie. No, it's one of it's a it's a knockoff of scary movies. You're spoofing a spoof. So wait, are they like related or something? No, they're not. hope not. I don't think so. The way that they shot some of these scenes, they better not be related. Who think they are? Luke and Leia? No, no, no. Dad and... Dad and... No, no, no. I'm talking about Dwayne and Estelle.
00:33:22
Speaker
Oh. Yeah, see, I was right for once. need to see that. I don't like the way this feels. put that on my letterbox. Dwayne is Harley Cross. Wait, you letterbox? Don't look at me. You are best friends with Derek. Don't look at me. I do it, I'm not good at it. No one likes me. At the end of the episode, we'll drop your guys' as I don't even know what mine is.
00:33:39
Speaker
i I'm old. I'm sorry. ah But Dwayne is played by Harley Cross, who we'll probably see again, maybe. or If not on the podcast, going to make you guys watch it anyway. I hope so. He plays 10-year-old, who took over for, in the fly to, who took over for Joe? Stoltz. Eric Stoltz.
00:33:58
Speaker
he play He didn't take over. He's his son. Oh, okay. That's right. He plays the 10-year-old version of Eric Stoltz. Oh, wow but Tall task. wonder if he lives in town, Dwayne.
00:34:10
Speaker
If you're watching, Dwayne. Dwayne, if you can hear us, please. Badmoviesworsepeople at gmail.com. Come hang out with us. Crying work is excellent. We love Do the best. Yeah. And Estelle is Amy Graham, who plays the blonde hostage in From Dusk Till Dawn.
00:34:25
Speaker
That's one of my favorite movies of all time. Blonde hostage. Oh, in the gas station. When they take those two teenage girls and they're in the gas station in the very beginning. okay. Remember that? Yeah. Yeah.
00:34:36
Speaker
Cinema. Yeah. Yes, the blonde hostage. She's also in ah Amos and Andrew. Oh, I know that one. No, Amos and Andrew.
00:34:47
Speaker
That's a Nicholas Cage and Samuel L. Jackson. don't even know that. You know how I love me some Nicholas Cage. And some Sammy Jacks. I've been 365 Days of Nicholas Cage. Oh, I should probably be in...
Comparisons and Cult Cinema Discussion
00:35:00
Speaker
And I just invited myself to join. and I'll be back. Do it. if fucking You still have time. He only had, what, 185? 106. By now, you should have watched at least 26, so get going.
00:35:13
Speaker
I'm on it. That's no problem. I can do it. That's two days. bet you can. Dude, Harvey Arbardem looks like he's in a discount matrix. I just thought of that. When you go to the matrix, when you log in, you get to like see the view of yourself.
00:35:26
Speaker
Matrix meets Machete. Matrix Chate. Yeah. I'll work on that. Matrix Day. Matrix Day is much better. um i fluff it up. He finishes it right off.
00:35:39
Speaker
He's hanging out. Javier Bardem's hanging out out by the car. And um so we meet those kids and they're going to do stuff. It's important for later. They're going on a date. They're in Susie, Texas, supposedly. Tucson, Arizona. Not Fourth Avenue.
00:35:54
Speaker
Definitely not the downtown of our know Tucson Inn in Susie, Texas. Yeah. Yeah, they go to the Tucson Inn. And then later, ah Tony Soprano goes, they were just in Tucson. And now they're coming here. And it's like, OK, guys. Well, anyways. like It's all Texas.
00:36:08
Speaker
Yeah. So I think they live in, so that first scene that we're at, the no, the Dwayne and Estella, I think they live in Susie because they even say they're going to No, no, because the dad says you're going to Susie. That's where the kids go to have a good time. where So they're they're probably some small little podunk town outside of Susie.
00:36:27
Speaker
It's like, you know, how people drive into Yuma to have a fiery ass weekend. Yeah, I know that, right? Oh, you guys are going to Yuma. That's where all the kids go to have fun. If you live in Quartzsite, yeah, you probably drive to Yuma to have a good time. Remember, always be in control. Always.
00:36:45
Speaker
One of our listeners, Matt, the crawler that we shared watching the movie, yeah Matt brought that to us. He actually lived for years. Oh, man, he's heard me just fucking give off so much sauce about the fucking city of Meanwhile, we live in Tucson. And we're all uppity. Making fun of Yuma makes me feel better about living here. Does it?
00:37:03
Speaker
Yeah. Oh, yeah. Fair enough. Whatever works. yeah. I'm not knocking it. I'm just trying to figure out I am. Sorry. was No, we're going to bounce all over. Yeah. Oh, he's waiting out by the car and ah Rosie Perez is in there buying a knife and we got James Gandolfini following her around. I only want to mention it because this guy takes a ah big spill throughout this movie. He starts this movie. James Gandolfini in a suit looking like a fed. He's DEA.
00:37:32
Speaker
Yeah, he's DEA. Gorgeous. And then right here he gets hit by a fucking car. svelte. For the first time. for the Did you hear that? The first time. Yeah, he gets put through the fucking ringer, man.
00:37:45
Speaker
Still looking good. Looks great. She buys a knife, like a giant machete, and just... Puts it in a tote bag. Just sets it in that purse. It's yeah like those shit's like as long as her whole forearm. I don't care if it's dangerous. I want it to float around in my purse.
00:37:59
Speaker
This is Mary Poppins' purse. the Let's see what else we got in here. Ooh, a little bit of machete makes the medicine go down, because if you don't take it, I'll fucking cut you. then... And we never see the machete again. no It never shows up again. It's the one he uses at the end. Yeah.
00:38:13
Speaker
Yeah. He uses the machete for for rituals. So I think it was, I don't think it was an actual machete. i think Because what she grabbed was thinner. It was like an inch knife. An inch wide. A long pokey knife. poke Yes.
00:38:28
Speaker
General, do the men have a lot of ah long pokey knives? Perfect to go through one ear and out the other. Yeah. These are short, slicey knives. We need long, pokey knives. I choose you, pokey knife. Do you see that guy just throw a knife at me?
00:38:44
Speaker
But we meet Reggie, who is played by Carlos Bardem, older brother Javier. Very gorgeous man. And I think it's at the end of the movie, because I was waiting for it, but apparently both Carlos and Javier were lit on fire during this movie. Oh, dang. By a stunt accident. a stunt gone wrong. Oh, it's the it's the it's the warehouse at the end. Yeah. Fuck yeah. So they were both lit on fire. So the Bardem line almost ended that day. Damn. We cannot have that.
00:39:08
Speaker
We would have had a world of normal haircuts. Do they have children now? I don't know. Not together. I mean, they're brothers, obviously. What do they look like? Luke and Leia? I said boys can't make babies. Penelope.
00:39:21
Speaker
Penelope. Oh, hello, Penelope. And he works for Santos. Well, he works he works for Santos, who works for Catalina. which is the one they owe money to, right? Santos works for Catalina? I thought it separate.
00:39:34
Speaker
Okay, I don't know. I think Santos is is higher up than Catalina. Catalina is who he owes money to. Santos is who he's doing a job for. Correct. Yeah, but that's what I mean. It's like Catalina, Santos.
00:39:45
Speaker
Two separate entities. I 100% be wrong. didn't feel like they were connected. Because he knew all the secret information about this. Yeah, he knows about... I think he's just working for both. That's his job to be informed. He says it. he'st He's an informant for the bad guys.
Reception and Fan Base
00:40:00
Speaker
Who's the he and that? Yeah, who? Reggie. reggie i'm not talking about reggie he well Reggie is working for both Santos. We were talking about Santos in kenina and Catalina. And Catalina. Anyway, it doesn't matter. I don't think he's working for Catalina at all.
00:40:11
Speaker
You'd think he just, oh, he just knows about it to and It's his business. But he like does work for Santos. Catalina is the one who tells them about Santos' trap. Yeah. Ashley's over here like, i haven't put this much thought into this movie. Hey, guys, I just get horny. I just get horny.
00:40:27
Speaker
I'm just a horny person. ah um this ah This movie is hard to follow when you have multiple people with you. Yeah.
00:40:37
Speaker
But it's awesome. you It's fantastic. But so we get to the crux of the movie, the the moving force, which is that Javier Bardem needs to deliver a semi-truck full of fetuses to Las Vegas so that Santos can make skin cream. Yeah. We are tired of the same old tropes in Hollywood. Oh, good. Another screen skin cream baby fucking merchant episode.
00:41:00
Speaker
ah God. This actually another baby merchant episode, I guess. That's a trope I would never get tired of, by the way. it is. it Also, it's just such a weird thing to have this truck refrigerated with the fetuses all lined up on display.
00:41:12
Speaker
They're all in jars just on in rows. Box them up. It looks cooler, though. It does look a lot cooler. when they fall out of the truck, then you get to watch them go clink and then like splatter. It's more of a squirsch. Yeah, I'm not trying to look at a box. It's a squirk. It's a splurk. A squirsch.
00:41:26
Speaker
It's a the tiniest squelch. Because they won't fit on the racks if they're in boxes. This is an ice... No, Derek answered it. It looks better. But my thing was just like, if a cop comes back there, it's like, yep, that's fetuses. Lock it up. Shoot them. That's why they had that dude back there with the one shotgun. Yeah. Skinny. Skinny. I love that this guy Santos, though. He says something to him and he's like ah like, remember, God and I are with you.
00:41:51
Speaker
Yeah. And I'm like, you're talking about selling fetuses to make baby cream. Well, yeah, or something. I mean, he's got one glass eye and he looks like. the other one's made of wood. he He offers him a legal ham.
00:42:02
Speaker
Yes. Yes. So, I mean, like anything he says, I'm kind of taking with a grain of salt. You know what I mean? We got to talk about legal ham. Yeah, but it's something where like you can't cure it that way in America. I want all of it. Yeah, it's like one it was like it when you get the thing on the the little wooden.
00:42:16
Speaker
yeah it's like when you get a whole ream of ham. Ream of ham. When a full ream. uh so office supplies is now selling ham the leg that you get from costco that's all right right and yeah the aged prosciutto leg and he just got it in the stretch limo and i saw you got if he says go with god you're like okay it is quite the setup to be like welcome my limo fresh sliced ham go with god and me me and god go with you we are some ham we are one in the same welcome to my limo here's some ham steal some fetuses god is with on your way out help yourself to some legal pineapple
00:42:49
Speaker
He only pays him half. I'm like, if I'm driving an 18-wheeler full of babies, full of babies, passed away. I'm going to tell you right now. Job done though.
00:43:00
Speaker
$10,000. You're going to pay me up front, bro. No, half up front and then half when the is done. Where are you going an 18 wheeler full of fetuses? You're parking it and leaving it on the side of the road. That's true. Half up front, the other half you complete it. I'm not a criminal. Apparently I am. No, no. You just made logical decision.
00:43:18
Speaker
I watch a lot of movies. I'm like, you get a quarter up front and then the three quarters after the job is done. Oh, come on. What if I want a sweet treat? You ain't getting no sweet treat. Nope. I'm saying a quarter of the amount, not 25 cents. No, I got that part.
00:43:32
Speaker
I understand that. Here's 25 cents. Drive this truck to Vegas. I can't even get trucker meth for that. You'll get the other 19,999. 75 cents. Trucker meth, you mean boxes of ephedrine?
00:43:45
Speaker
Yeah. And lot lizard head. Oh, yeah. It's good work if you can get it. It's honest. It's honest. That's not much, but it's honest It doesn't seem very honest. Seems like it might be dishonest.
00:43:57
Speaker
It seems like someone was forced into that. You know what you're doing. Some of them. Sex workers work. We got a couple Jason Statham movies to watch. There's a lot of human trafficking going on.
00:44:10
Speaker
Jason Statham. Oh, we could also watch ah Liam's Neeson's. Yeah. There's some trafficings in theirs. A couple taken. The only action movie I was ever like, you know what? Hell yeah. That came out like post. Really? You like that token? Yeah.
00:44:22
Speaker
I was young. I was in my 20s. Liam Neeson wasn't. I liked Taken. didn't mind Taken 2 pissed me off. I never saw that. It the same fucking movie. I'm not saying I mind it. I am not even bad-mouthing Taken. I am just saying it is wild to be the last action movie I cared about was Taken.
00:44:38
Speaker
Well, because I don't really watch action movies apart from like our golden era. That's fair. That's fair. we can We can fix all this. It's not my genre. didn't think that We can fix all this. It's not my genre. It's fine. We love you. Miami Connection.
00:44:52
Speaker
on beautiful 4K. What is that? The best movie. it's It's a one star movie that I will watch forever and
Behind-the-Scenes Trivia
00:45:00
Speaker
ever. Is it modern or is it like old timey? ah Like our time? 1980s.
00:45:04
Speaker
Oh yeah. Okay. Oh, I think that Lee knows this movie. Who is this? Then you, YK Kim. Who the fuck is Lee? That's nobody. That's nobody. Hi honey. All those actors are nobody. My husband.
00:45:16
Speaker
Yeah, no, this is feeling personal. it Who's got the guitar? Who's jamming? They are ninja. band. they're a band more nor they band of ninjas who do taekwondo. Taekwondo?
00:45:29
Speaker
They fight drug dealers. Oh, they have to fight ninjas to stop them from selling cocaine. That's You know what? Okay, hold on, you guys. I might be able to enjoy the movie if I have Ashley with me for the first time she watches it. Yeah, we can just watch it. I'm cool like that. I might be able to get into Thank you. I'd probably need a lot of alcohol, though. We can allow it. We can listen the vinyl beforehand. It'll be fine. Just to warm you up. You have a vinyl? have the vinyl.
00:45:55
Speaker
It's usually on display, also. I feel like there's like a lot of lore here. They're best friends. You've wandered into Derek's and Whitney's Shire. These ninja kids are- I mean, marriage Shire!
00:46:07
Speaker
Derek's out there, I don't want any guests or well-wishers of any kind at my door. These ninja kids that are in college, even though Y2K, whatever his name is, it's YK kids. 45. call him Y2K because he never came. the event!
00:46:23
Speaker
why but if
00:46:27
Speaker
Damn, this movie is wild. Ninjas are fighting Y2K. The fucking ATM just won't stop spitting money out. They're like... and wish that happened. We gotta stop that. gotta stop that with our nunchaus. But they're best friends. They go to college. Fight the ninja.
00:46:42
Speaker
It's just in fucking state. The he acting is horrendous. Yeah, no, I can see it. I don't know why movies i she did that. I don't know what she's doing. Enough champagne fill the Nile. Yeah, Ashley gets it. Here.
00:46:59
Speaker
She's going to love that movie, man. Take three. Here. Hey, Jeff, can you put more on it? here All right, that's all we're getting from Jeff. That's that's a wrap on Jeff.
00:47:10
Speaker
yeah Poor Jeff. Jeff from craft services didn't want to get involved. in Oh, of course. Like you do. um That's a hero story. Don't spoil it. You only hang out with orphans.
00:47:21
Speaker
Okay, sorry. Back to sexy. Javier Bardem and Rosie Perez decide they want to, or they need, to sacrifice some people to give them good luck on selling fetuses. Well, yeah, because he didn't get to sacrifice for the other one. That body was already dead. He needs a real sacrifice to please the gods. Well, i just love that she's like, dude, that shit's voodoo horse shit. Fuck you. and then he's like, we gotta kill some people. And she's like, all right. I think she just really wants to kill some people.
00:47:48
Speaker
ah she did say, make them white. yeah really did want ah Blonde, tan, and muscular, she says. This is why I look this way. That way nobody from Mexico ever wants to chop Someone's coming for you, dude. You've got a distinct vibe. And someone's someone out there is like, this is who I would take. Hopefully somebody's coming for me. He is a homeowner.
00:48:06
Speaker
I'm also a homeowner. Sorry.
00:48:13
Speaker
I love the the first guy. The first guy Javier Bardem grabs is this drunkard drunk Harry Dean. Well, so Harry Dean Stanton. Harry Dean Stanton, but if he was drunk. Harry Dean Stanton, if you enjoyed drinking all day.
00:48:25
Speaker
harde stanton genless and let's Harry Dean Harry Dean Stanton. With a comb over. He is the character actor version of famous character actor. Harry Dean Stanton. Yeah. We can't afford Harry Dean Stanton, but get that drunk from Tucson.
00:48:37
Speaker
That scene also takes place in our main drag of our downtown bar scene. We got like Surly Winch area we think was what were down to. Before the Surly Winch was there, though. Right. I didn't recognize a of these places. Because this was like when we were kids. There was definitely Puff and I was fully a There was a Puff and Stuff. We're showing our Tucson when you mentioned Puff and Stuff. Yeah.
00:48:54
Speaker
So they kidnap our blonde friends, Dwayne and Estelle. You find me some Nazis, dude. Yeah. And I just love, like, they drive away with them. Like, she grabs them out of a crowd with a gun. Everybody's just like, whoa.
00:49:06
Speaker
All right. Watch out for that. Elon Musk chasing him. Watch out for the pedophile. pedophile take the kid. They're blonde hair, blue eyed. Get them. Help them. Help them. These are the minorities. We are running out of blonde hair, blue eyed people. These are the future. That's true. It's so true. Go on.
00:49:24
Speaker
The drunk guy is kind of doing a Elon Musk because he's like, they're going to kill the kids. It's the devil. They're going to eat them. I saw it in his eyes. And then my favorite part of the movie, he looks in the camera and just says, fuck all of Has anybody seen American Movie?
00:49:38
Speaker
I'm sure you guys have seen it. About the gentleman who's making the movie about Coven, the movie. I don't know it. Yeah. Well, the grandpa at the end, that was his grandpa that he has filming for his movie. And he gives him like all those lines that... delivery of those lines really reminded me of said grandpa. Thanks for listening.
00:49:52
Speaker
I just like fuck all of you. a great wow great way to end that scene. It was good. And like the kids are like trying
Final Thoughts and Memorable Quotes
00:50:00
Speaker
to beg for their lives. They're like, oh shit, they're going to kill us. and I love Dwayne just starts with, I understand that your people have been oppressed.
00:50:07
Speaker
But it's not my fault. It's not my fault. It's not our fault. You took a culture studies class at Pima, and now all a sudden you think you know everything. Dwayne. he had his finger on the pulse, though. That's pretty well is that's pretty daring talk for 97. It is seven is woke 97. We didn't know that word. He is the epitome of woke, though. He is blonde hair, blue eyed, and remorseful.
00:50:27
Speaker
Yeah, he's the start of white guilt. I did like Harvey Arbardem. He's like, I'm not going to kill you. He's like, oh, thank God. He's like, it's going to much worse. You're going to wish you were dead. I'm going to fuck you. You ever thought about having Christmas in hell?
00:50:39
Speaker
Yeah. Kind of my thing. Literally what he said, though. so You're going to have Christmas in hell for the free eternity. i need to see it. i I want to know. Christmas in hell to me is July singing Christmas carols in Tucson.
00:50:51
Speaker
Yeah. Christmas in hell. I get that. ah James Gandolfini teams up with a sheriff. ah sheriff yes Sheriff Rip Ford. Another deep voice. played by a guy named Harry Porter.
00:51:02
Speaker
Yes. I'm not ordering one of those. That's enough, Diane. Dude, he's sitting there getting a fucking blowy from what could be a county or his assistant, but you don't see, he's like, ah shut the door on your way out. Diane, that's enough. I have come now.
00:51:17
Speaker
And then he's looking at a picture of Doris Day, a black and white framed photo that he has with Doris Day while this person questionably not Doris Day. The very un-Doris Day. The least Doris Day person. It is Doris night and day between the two of them. Jack said she was getting free handicap parking and I said she doesn't have a car. but I think there's some sort of benefit here where she's like... I think she's just not going to jail. using she very liberally. We don't know. and But also Derek has a point. You're just not jail. I think it's a hooker. Yeah. And if you blow the sheriff, you don't go to jail. I've been there. um we've all I'm the sheriff also.
00:51:53
Speaker
I haven't been there. um But yeah, Gandolfini teams up with him to go find Romeo because he's got this laundry list of crimes. Oh, let's not forget the spark plug of a deputy.
00:52:06
Speaker
We'll talk more about him in the car. God. Is he your kid? And then meanwhile, back at the ranch, the Mexican ranch, Estelle is being held hostage with Screamin' Jay.
00:52:18
Speaker
Yep. Yeah. And ah Javier Bardem is torturing... like Dwayne. Dwayne. He's not physically. No, but mentally. Oh, yeah. like, look at my sticker book. Yes.
00:52:32
Speaker
Look at my sticker book. And he's like, what are these stickers? It's a wonderful collection. Wonderful collection. This made me question life. he's Interesting. He's like, interesting. but What do you mean interesting? This made me want to find God. Right? See that fucking sticker? Jay Hawkins had one of the best lines, too, because he's like, do you want a blanket? And the girl's like, say something.
00:52:50
Speaker
Do you want a blanket? Yeah, because she's begging for him to let her go. got card. I'll give you the number now. I got 40 bucks and a credit card. I'll give you the number. And he's just like. No. Yeah. and No, this credit card's cool, but Javier Bardem will eat me. I also don't have a computer.
00:53:05
Speaker
don't know what you want from me. i they They make me show an ID. I don't look like an Estella. It's 1997. It's 1997. Amazon just sells books. What do I want? Oh, God. Read a book? It got dark. ah We didn't know what we had. yeah We didn't know. We didn't know.
00:53:21
Speaker
We didn't know it all. That's another terrible movie you should watch. Yeah. I'll talk to you about that one. It's phenomenal one. I can't wait. Voyage of the Rock Aliens. That movie fucks. Those
Key Scenes and Tension Building
00:53:32
Speaker
are like someone's kid cousins. That's not Craig Schaefer I'll live here have another room Sorry son, my five year old son one under 18 can come You'll be visited i don't know, it's kind of far away it's cross now I live 40 minutes away Maybe at the mall Not Park Place El Con only you The dead mall
00:54:05
Speaker
They're all dead. So he's got Dwayne tied up to the chair doing the picture book thing. And then then we have Rosie Perez. Or no. Estella leaves. She breaks out. She breaks out. And then Rosie Perez corners her.
00:54:19
Speaker
she Traps her in the bar. she's like, you're not going to shoot me because you would have already done it. Don't think about doing something. Just do it. I'm going to take it without asking. yeah The way she closes these doors, though. Oh my God. This whole scene is fucking hot. Very hot.
00:54:31
Speaker
it It scratches my mommy, mommy thing. Like where she like gets you on the ground. like lick my fucking boat. and like, all that. yeah Give me the other one. Yeah. jack Jack was having a rough time. This one's only,
Problematic Themes and Character Analysis
00:54:40
Speaker
only this one's clean. You're going walk in a weird circle. Now they're both clean. That's a weird circle. Streamline.
00:54:46
Speaker
Was it uncomfortable watching this with me? No, much my pants got really tight. Okay. speaking Are you glad I put a divider between us now? No, I'm glad I wore underwear. Wow. Speaking of tight pants. Yes.
00:55:00
Speaker
I don't it a rape scene coming up? It is. Yeah, it's a trigger warning on that, but let's just. a trigger warning. It is problematic. It's done well. We're also just really terrible. He is a loving rapist. Yeah. Because he goes down on her first. And is Well, and here's the fucking goddamn elephant in the room. It's like, we talk about when you're courting somebody and you do some stalkery shit.
00:55:23
Speaker
Sometimes if you like that person, it's not stalkery, it's romantic. I love Rosie Perez. and if she was to She couldn't do this against my will, but if she did, be like, thank you. Yeah. I mean, he kind of does too at the end. I can't speak for a woman. I'm just saying for
Comparison to 'Natural Born Killers'
00:55:39
Speaker
me, it goes both ways in this scene. Rosie Perez is raping Dwayne in the hallway. Yes. Javier Bardem is raping Estelle in the bedroom.
00:55:46
Speaker
But yeah, she's doing it. Rosie Perez is doing it just to get back. Like she's mad at Javier Bardem for banging Estelle. Yeah. So she's doing it, but he does get all excited. And then she's just like, and I'm done. Time should have came already. Yeah.
00:55:58
Speaker
Yeah. he's just like, wait, he literally goes like, wait, what? He's like, come back. And I don't think there's a lot of movies that I can think of where I've seen a, a, female presenting person initiating a sexual assault now. I know I have seen it, but not yeah not in this way.
00:56:16
Speaker
It felt good for me. It felt good for me too. It was good for me. It felt even Stevens. It felt good for Dwayne. Dwayne wasn't complaining. And it felt even. I liked it for... Dwayne's not a complainer. I didn't feel as gross about it. And then when Javier... Which is not right. We all have our things.
00:56:33
Speaker
When Javier is with Estella, he takes care of her first. Yeah. He's going down there and she stops fighting and she's like, oh, God, this is heaven. We also learned right before this that she's a virgin. Yes.
00:56:45
Speaker
So the first thing anybody ever did was go down her. It was Javier Bardem. Apparently he's really good. I mean, Rosie Perez, or no, he said, he's like, she's like, you're clown. He's like, a clown with a golden cock. Yeah. It goes to the tongue.
00:56:57
Speaker
His cock goes to his tongue. Is he Midas? is Is he just gold? Oh, yeah. Everything he fucks turns to gold. But it is uncomfortable. Yeah, it is. Absolutely. Because it's it's done well and all this, that, and the other, but it is a fucking non-consensual double Well, it's to help you let you know these characters that people are going to presumably like. Yeah. Like Natural Born Killers and stuff. People are like, oh, I love those guys. I love a Mickey a Mallory.
00:57:23
Speaker
They're not doing good things. And so this is that, but it's like, here, let's make sure you know these are bad. I did have heavy natural born killer vibes though. Yeah, it was
Plot Summary and Chaotic Events
00:57:32
Speaker
even the scene at the parents' house when they, what we already covered, where they go to meet the parents, that scene, even just the set design,
00:57:39
Speaker
is very, and everything just like the furniture and the colors and just the way it's shot very much looks like that scene where they go to Juliette Lewis's parents' house. And all that craziness happens. I mean, the abuse from the dad, but. it's kind of like in Dart, weirdly implied. I felt like. Always be in control.
00:57:56
Speaker
just some weird application. The father definitely gave off weird fucking vibes. Like that is my person. Yeah, it's very weird. He has to be in control. Yeah. And so I just always thought that was pretty cool, the end. Likes to tell her when to shower. The end. End of story. That's end.
00:58:10
Speaker
oh But these guys, they decide they're only going sacrifice one of these kids. Sure. But Javier Bardem goes to them and he's like, why don't we all four decide? We'll let the decide. We how this going. Paper, rock, scissor.
00:58:23
Speaker
We do this the old fashioned way. Once, twice, three, odds. Immediately they start selling out each other. Yeah. She's like, yeah, don't take him. Take him. That's fuck. you Fuck that guy. I want to live. Doesn't he start it though? or no.
00:58:35
Speaker
No, she doesn't. She does. Okay. Okay. And then he's like, you fucking bitch. So he's like, no, take her. so yeah. Um, also take my wife. If we were ever in that situation, I'd be like, I'm a willing participant. Oh yeah. They wouldn't be a fan of about my husband go.
00:58:51
Speaker
They wouldn't be a fan of how quick I'd be ready to die. This is a bonkers movie in the fucking funnest way where I should have fucking like tried to describe it you know with like a 30-second clip. Yeah. But it's just... I had fun with it, but man.
00:59:04
Speaker
It's all over the place. Uh-huh. It feels like you guys said earlier. feels like meth. But it's connected quite well. It feels like 97 Tucson. It's hot and meth-y. Yeah. easy to follow.
00:59:15
Speaker
But it is all over the place. When you're watching it, yeah. But when you step away for a sec, you're kind of like, huh? What? I missed something. It's easy if you watch it. It's not easy to, like, summarize. So we're having a little bit trouble. Yeah. you know What do you mean it's not easy to summarize?
00:59:29
Speaker
A girl that killed had her sister dead meets a guy that's a fucking witch that robs banks and sells fetuses but tries to have his cousin not get killed and kills him anyway and then things happen.
00:59:39
Speaker
yeah
Dark Humor in Chaotic Scenes
00:59:40
Speaker
yeah no it makes so fucking perfect Stockholm Syndrome also is involved that's the synopsis on the movie by the way on the website that's exactly what it says that's the professionally written synopsis that's about right things happen and stuff perfect writing why say many where'd when few do trick few do trick But they decide to sacrifice the girl.
01:00:00
Speaker
Yeah. Javier Bardem gets an audience. People just really want to see this blonde girl die. Well, he thinks that Perez only wants Estella killed for because of her jealousy. Yeah.
01:00:12
Speaker
And he's like, why not the blonde boy? Because you want to fuck him? you want him? he takes that one. He takes the girl because then this all happens. and then Because that's what Screamin' J says. He's like, fuck her. She hit me. Yeah. Yeah.
01:00:24
Speaker
Our weird biker dude from earlier comes back now. Yeah. Kinky D. Yeah. Dude, this weird messed out guy. His eyes are just like. sorry. I was addressing you. Matthew What's up, Kinky D?
01:00:36
Speaker
That's funny. He sneaks in and bonks Rosie Perez. Yeah, little bonk. One of the other guys firebombs the sacrificial ceremony. Yeah. Like the whole altar and Everything's so flammable in there. But it's funny because like you had a- It's too strong. It's very dry. You had a surprise element. You could have shot him.
01:00:54
Speaker
Yeah. But movie over. They didn't want to shoot him. They want their money. We got the movie going. Where's the money, Lebowski? No, we no, no. Because ah fucking Skinny D says to him, fuck the money. You don't owe Catalina money anymore. I'm going to take him your head.
01:01:08
Speaker
Oh, that's right. That's right. So like the debt's all done the debt's all done now. It's just that you are, your life is forfeit. And I'm going to get my debt off by showing you the head. Get your debt off. He's going to ash in your skull. I'm going to give him some head and it's your head that I'm giving him. He was thinking about making your skull into a gumball machine.
01:01:25
Speaker
I thought it was cool, but not practical. I was going to make it into a bowl. I was going to do a lava lamp.
01:01:34
Speaker
But Screamin' Jay Hawkins gets No. And we found out he has 35 confirmed children, but maybe. 33 confirmed children. in real life.
01:01:44
Speaker
In real life. Could be as high as 75. What a life. Wow. Screaming Jay Hawkins be fucking. dirty dog. Is he driving that seed, boy? It's that deep voice like, you want to come back to my place? I feel like I have to.
01:01:58
Speaker
he just kept putting a spell on him. Yeah. He did sing about it. Yeah. Which at this point I'm already disappointed because we have not had a Screaming J. Hawkins song. Didn't Genghis Kong do something like that? Oh yeah.
01:02:11
Speaker
Well his was raping and pillaging. Yeah. Screaming J. Hawkins was being smooth. It was just pillaging. you know He's just just pillaging. That's that's that's that's he's kissing grandma and's kissing gra he's dropping girls baby like real spnies but ah Someone gets stabbed in the head. Oh, Shorty D. Oh, yeah, Shorty D. This is the knife from earlier. So it's not the end. It's right here. This is one of the ends.
01:02:34
Speaker
This is the ending of this chapter. This is the beginning of the end. Yeah. But yeah, he stabs that dude right through the fucking head, which is pretty sweet. And he's like, where's your
Character Motivations and Interactions
01:02:42
Speaker
gods? Did they leave you now? Yeah. And everything burns down except for Rosie Perez, Javier Bardem, and Luke and Leia there. yep ah Yep. Because they save them.
01:02:53
Speaker
She freaking Perez is just like, get the fuck in the Jeep right now. or and She's like, Dwayne! and like Like he's not a fucking The whole time, James Gandolfini and Harry Potter are watching. They're just watching this go down. The fucking spark plug deputy's like, oh, we got to watch from back here. We can go in there and storm in right now. What are we doing back here? We're watching. Get your gun out of my face. He is so excited, dude. Like, this Mexico. We can't do anything here.
01:03:19
Speaker
Uh-huh. We have no jurisdiction. He's like, is this family? It's my sister's kid. Yeah, my sister's boy. Ugh. He's real dumb. Oh, my God. The way he talks, though. Oh, my God, you guys. Oh, my God. Why are we sitting here? We could be storming the castle. Get Get it. got 45 with your fucking name on it. I run these streets. If you don't know, now you know. We got the power. Extra, extra.
01:03:44
Speaker
Extra, extra. Read all about
Humorous Resilience and Action
01:03:48
Speaker
it. When you see this, he screams that he was a paper kid. Put on some stakeout music, baby, because I'm a thug. Love this one. Yeah.
01:03:57
Speaker
um Somebody tells Javier Bardem that he's a... so He says that he's man... man With a jaguar's body and a camel's dick? Grandma. It's the sheriff. ah It's the sheriff. It's like they say he's a... Something....in an insert name here that i do not know. yeah And he's like, he's got the face of a man, the body of a jaguar, and the cock of a camel.
01:04:19
Speaker
I think that he said Jaguar. The anus of an otter. yes Freshwater otter. Freshwater otter. They have better anuses. The salt really messes with the other ones. Fuckery.
01:04:32
Speaker
ah Fuckery. Javier Bardem gets his feet is struck. Yeah. Yep. Wait, his feet is struck? His feet is struck by lightning. No, his feet is struck. These two guys driving this truck. What did I say? one was bullet tooth Tony.
01:04:49
Speaker
Yeah, Vinnie Jones. The one that I liked was ah David Spade and who else did I say for him? Oh, God. I can't remember. I said the dude from Criminal Minds. Yeah. And half David Spade, though.
01:04:59
Speaker
For sure. ah Who's the guy from ah Limitless and Hangover? Bradley Cooper. That's who it was. It was Bradley Cooper and and David Spade. Okay. It's just weird that your first one was Limitless.
01:05:13
Speaker
Yeah. Right. Hangover. Wedding Crashers. Rocket Raccoon. Yeah, I went hangover. Weird. You didn't. Oh, I didn't. I said limitless. Yeah, weird. It's just the weird one.
01:05:27
Speaker
um But he gets his fetus truck and then it has a shootout with the cops. That's how the quickly these things happen. The way the fucking nephew comes running at these people. Yeah, that little kid, that this paper boy. are you going to insert clips here? Because if you do, this one would be great. Because he is just, he's with a six shooter, able to shoot 15 bullets while he's running straight at, like leaving these two old dudes in the dust. Don't worry. I got this one. I got this one. When he does shoot a guy, he unloads on him. He's like, got him.
01:06:00
Speaker
Reloads. Oh, so he's a cop. Oh, you shot a bunch of people? No, I got this one guy really good. Yeah, he's extra We've established that he's a cop. so I didn't just kill him. I made his face unrecognizable. No open casket on this one. You know what i'm talking about? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:06:15
Speaker
There's a bunch of dummies getting squished by trucks. James Gandolfini gets hit by a fucking car again. There's number two. The dummy truck. is great because it's every set of wheels that this fucking tractor trailer has. All 18. It is awesome. It's great. And then you get to see it squish the head the last moment. Squelch. And we've got like a road full of busted jar fetuses.
Cameos and Character Lineup
01:06:40
Speaker
Yeah, and the door's open, so you know more jars are falling out. there's just jars falling out. I wonder which way they went. do you want to start by following that that ah trail of fetuses? We'll start there.
01:06:50
Speaker
i mean, if Hansel and Gretel had done that, the witch wouldn't have came and got them. Right? That's true. Should have been picking up fetuses. yeah and Hansel wouldn't have diabetes. Yeah. You have to leave this trail of fetuses so we can find way back to the village. I love the cop that picks it up. He's like, yep, dead fetus. Take that for me. He's got like a Ziploc. No gloves. We need gloves here. That cop is played by Alex Cox.
01:07:12
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Who is a director... ah Well, he was a director. He directed a Repo Man and Sid and Nancy are the good ones. Okay. Yeah. And then he, I don't know, meth? I don't know. He went Well, he filmed this movie in Tucson in 97. And he never left. He didn't make it out. Hooked on the stuff. Yeah, you don't make it out from that. I saw that he's
Dangerous Alliances and Tension
01:07:32
Speaker
in some of the other movies this director did too. so Maybe they're just buddies. They're homies. That's cool. I like it.
01:07:37
Speaker
They're meth friends. Yeah.
01:07:41
Speaker
This is the next that we go back to Santos. This is the second time he mentions God. I don't think he understands what he's doing. I feel like he's trying to put himself with God. Just so you know, God goes with you. And I'm on'm there, too. I'm also with you. meet God are friends. It's this kid's birthday party and he's wearing a clown nose and he takes it off and has this very serious conversation about like those is right here. And then he's like, they have this assassin called the fist, which I don't think we ever end up seeing. Yeah, we do.
01:08:06
Speaker
Oh, yeah, we do. Yeah, we do. Gandolfini kills him. Yeah, yeah, that's right. This assassin the fist that they're hiring, and he's like, I approve the fist, and may God be with him. yeah And then he just goes, and pops the phone. done talking about murder. Where are those kids?
01:08:22
Speaker
like His granddaughter's birthday party. yeah Might be his birthday party. It was looking weird. oh And then that that part gets really weird.
Cultural References and Absurd Humor
01:08:32
Speaker
We're not going to talk about that part.
01:08:33
Speaker
Just if you watch, there's a trigger warning right there. Yeah. Well, it'll a little bit later, but it's related. Yeah. Same dude. Same dude, same situation. Ew. um So, but now we know they they're going to have, ah ah what's his name? Romero?
01:08:49
Speaker
Romeo? Romeo. Romeo. Romeo. Or they're going to have him killed. They're just done with him. Yeah. And the EA's onto him. He's been followed. We shouldn't have hired him. He's fucked it all up. This is when we see the fist, because he comes right pretty much right away, goes for Gandolfini. Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah, I forgot because the guy is not, he's barely in the movie. He's this killer, it's crazy assassin.
01:09:07
Speaker
He shows up, jumps but jumps up behind Gandolfini and Gandolfini just shoots him in the fucking face. End of the fist. But such a cool shot because this guy's got him with that fucking rope. And as soon as Gandolfini puts the gun up, he's like, oh, fuck.
01:09:19
Speaker
yeah No one's ever done that before. Right? Why would you not do it? Holy shit. I never thought to so have someone take just shoot a gun right next to your head. Gandolfini's been hit by a car twice. Now he doesn't have hearing in his right ear. yeah Yeah. I would love to see that reaction of just like, oh, I didn't think that one through. Oh my God. That is going to fuck up all of my podcasting. It's ringing.
01:09:43
Speaker
I'm never going to be able to listen to Bad Movies, Worst People. Gandolfini loves Bad Movies, Worst People. Gandolfini
Dark Comedy and Eccentric Moments
01:09:49
Speaker
would love Bad Movies, Worst People. He listens to it. I named a sex move after him. He listens to it. Did you? In the grave.
01:09:56
Speaker
He's dead? yeah. He died in like 2013. Sorry you just found out about that. It's new to you. It's rough, though. Take as much time as you need. Good news is he's skinny again.
01:10:07
Speaker
a is he wants to be. And he has plenty of time to listen to bad movies, worse people. yeah Absolutely. Me and God both go with him. big time Big time.
01:10:19
Speaker
Big time. So Gandolfini and Alex Cox are going to El Paso, which is where they find out the two are. And they're on this plane with, coincidentally, Herb Satisfy Herb Satisfy Weird With the Largest collection of mini Shooters That are empty I'm like This These Air ah Flight Attendants I was like Airline Servers Steward I Steward I These flight attendants would not.
01:10:46
Speaker
There's no way. 97 is different. He was different then, bro. We didn't know what had. you I know. We didn't know what we had. 9-11 took so much from us. so Little liquor bottles. a plenty This guy drinks so much Tangeray. Yeah. Because these are all just little tiny Tangeray bottles. There was plethora of alcohols. I saw 99 bananas in there. I saw tequila. swear to God. Mr. Satisfied is not drinking 99 bananas. I saw the fucking bottle. Roll the footage. Roll that beautiful bean footage. I saw a bunch of green.
01:11:17
Speaker
Because I saw it. Roll that beautiful bean footage. Have you been on this? so But also, 97, I think they're going to serve him, Derek. This guy's white with money. And name is going to satisfy. but he's just My daughter was kidnapped. Give me all the alcohol. Yeah, he's sitting there talking to himself about his plan. And Gandolfini's
Romance and Tension in Chaos
01:11:33
Speaker
trying to take a shit. And he's just like, what?
01:11:35
Speaker
What'd you say? ah and he's like, I'm just going to go kill the devil. oh Oh, you're talking to me. That's pretty cool, I guess. I'm going to go kill the devil. Do you mess in Tucson? Oh, we're all flying to Tucson. I've heard that talk before.
01:11:49
Speaker
You're not connecting. Dwayne in the Cell escape again. but Yeah, they escape again. This time in the Boneyard. Yes, they're in the Boneyard. Here's another movie. Because, I mean, we said if you film in Tucson, you have to do the fucking Boneyard.
01:12:05
Speaker
We love the boat we're clapping for boneyards always. But I mean, pretty much they escape just to get caught and piss off Harvey. He's he's this close to fucking blowing off that kid's head. Yeah.
01:12:19
Speaker
The hammer is back on that gun. he said He's had that Rosie Perez inside of him. He's like, but I'm not going to be Eskimo cousins with you. Yeah, surely. Wearing a lady's shirt. A lady's garment. It's a pajama shirt. is But it's like a high-top pajama shirt. It's like a little lady. It's buttoned for the boobs and then it opens for the belly. Well, for him, it's midriff.
01:12:39
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. No, this is a 90s, like... high school girl but not the ones i was hanging out with a shirt was hanging with the cool kids this shirt made an appearance in the music video for the band six pence none the richer yeah the od kiss me oh yeah i'm pretty sure most of uh what are the fuck tom cruise's ex-wife's name is nicole kidman katie holmes katie holmes Old Kidman?
01:13:09
Speaker
That one too. I'm an old lady. Most of Katie Holmes'
Betrayal and Revenge Themes
01:13:13
Speaker
wardrobe was probably these shirts. Well, Dawson's Creek. At that time. Yeah, it was a little tiny shirt that he got to wear. But he looks so cute. Dwayne's such a good cry. He was rocking it. This is where he's really selling the crying because Harvey Arbor Dems got him by the back of the head and he's like, ooh. Just every now and then he's quiet and then just wow i mean How do you cry?
01:13:36
Speaker
he was in the shower like a man so nobody fucking sees it You can say you had soap in your eyes and that's why your eyes are red I'm just by myself like it was soap It was soap in my eyes My cat Who's asking Jack? Kage is judgy
01:13:51
Speaker
juy Look, you've heard of shower beers, but when people find out that I have shower pasta, they start to get real concerned. I'm just saying a hot shower and a bowl of yeas. oh my God. That sounds really good.
01:14:04
Speaker
Only you who want a hot shower and bowl and yeas. I mean, if it's a clean shower. Well, you keep the bowl on the back of the shower so the water doesn't have it. No, the trick is to go under the stream. Feels like a really ghetto waterfall. It's like I'm in Italy eating pasta under a waterfall. No, you're just in the movie Gummo. Jack, out of the bathroom. hearing gummo right that and so You're so disgusting. It's a rough city. i also have that on Of course you fucking... Of course you dude, guys. You gotta have it. You gotta have it. Oh.
01:14:37
Speaker
But they they go to Mexico and they go to Catalina's place. It's just Javier and Estelle. Yeah.
Violent Climax and Symbolism
01:14:44
Speaker
Because he's going in. I think he's pretending because he's like, oh, this is my other half. No.
01:14:48
Speaker
The other half of the money. Oh, the other half of, don't know, whatever. He's trading her. Here's half of your money and here's the other half. okay. Yeah. Assuming she's worth $10,000. But he really just went there to kill him. Oh, yeah. Previously they showed him going to his grandma's little two-car village and lighting their shit on fire. And killed her little Jesus. Because he got a letter from her.
01:15:07
Speaker
She had a little boyfriend named jesus that looked like Jesus. and now he He's saccharine from the demon knight. He's not, but he is. Sriracha. Sriracha. It was like little prince Jesus. Yeah, I love it because he's he's acting nice. He's like, dude, let's do this. like yeah I'll help you out.
01:15:22
Speaker
Let's do some shots together. Heard you ah went and visited my grandma. He's like, quite another time I sent people. Oh, okay. Fucking stab him in the face. Ooh, look, a liquor bottle.
01:15:33
Speaker
That'll be fun. And he gets blood in his eye, which I really, appreciate the bit when i yeah an actor gets a little bit of that stage blood in their eye and they just keep rolling it when he's Because they have the little tussle and he gets bloodied up. When he's on top of dude and he's just got the blood going in and out between his teeth. it Great shot. Great shot. And then he's like, the the guy getting killed is like laughing. He's like, hey, I'm dead. You're dead. You're going to set up for a trap.
01:15:59
Speaker
I'll be waiting for you in hell. And Harvey Arbardum just goes to
Love for the Movie and Recommendations
01:16:03
Speaker
town with the fucking broken tequila bottle. In the eyes. Like fucking 50 touches. And they even have the the fucking fake dummy head that they're just yeah glass sticking out of it and shit. It's great. It's brutal. It was brutal when he was just doing it without them showing it. But when they showed it, I was like, oh, that kind of ruins it.
01:16:19
Speaker
And then it went into like the glass. And I was like, oh, no, never mind. Makes it it's much better. Yeah. They don't make it like that no more. You're like, ooh, oh, oh. You're pretty wrong when you say that. like They don't make movies like this anymore. No, they don't. And if they do, we don't see we don't get to see them. And we barely get to see this one.
01:16:36
Speaker
Derek might see them. I get to see them. Derek knows about all that shit. he's like He's got all the fucking insides. Yeah. Must be nice. It's really cheap. It is nice. Are you jealous? I'm a little jealous. it's It's a really cheap hobby. Everybody should pick up.
01:16:50
Speaker
Well, I have you know have a little kid now, so I can't just be watching this shit. They go to bed, Ashley. Yeah, they go to bed, but I'm so tired. When he goes to bed, I go to bed. and Catalina, the guy playing him will probably be back on the movie or the podcast at some point. ah hu ah Damien Bashir, maybe.
01:17:11
Speaker
Yeah, you're trying. You're trying. But he's in ah he's in the the Godzilla vs. Kong. He's in Weeds a bunch. That's where I really recognized him. Yeah, he was the president of Mexico, President Reyes. Yeah, he was dating a girl, that Mary Beth, whatever. Mrs. Weeds. Yeah, he's dating Mrs. Weeds.
01:17:30
Speaker
um He's in Machete Kills, Alien Covenant, Hateful Eight. So, I mean, he'll be back probably, but it'll be most likely ah Patreon. so Yeah. Yeah. Sounds like it. Patreon.com slash We're Speed. Three bucks a month, by the way. i don't know if you know that. I
Patreon Promotions and Audience Engagement
01:17:43
Speaker
don't. Please tell me. three bucks a month, you can get three. Wow. You get an extra movie a month that is a good movie or at least a mental health pick for us. Yes. um This month we have Demon Knight. Demon Knight. Perfect. Thank you.
01:17:58
Speaker
ah We also do so something called Latchkey Vids where we watch shows from the 90s that either you knew about that got canceled or no one ever knew about. Right now we're doing Cop Rock. Oh, I don't know about that.
01:18:09
Speaker
should. It's phenomenal. We're going to talk off camera about Cock Rock. I'm going to give three of my American dollars. You can also opt to pledge more than $3. Because we're not doing tears. You can also we have a couple people that pledged at $5. She has to save, five bucks is too much. She needs to save money for the Criterion half off sale.
01:18:25
Speaker
That's right. At three bucks a month, patreon.com, let us know. Slash worst people.
Teasers for Upcoming Episodes
01:18:30
Speaker
Slash worst people. I love it. um Oh, and this month we're talking about Heil Honey, I'm Home on Letch Keevids. Whoa. So I found...
01:18:41
Speaker
I found 90s British sitcom that only had one episode released. It is. One episode? Hell, honey, I'm home. honey, I'm home. Where Hitler and Ava Braun are doing an I Love Lucy style sitcom list living next to Jewish people.
01:18:58
Speaker
Like he walks it he walks in and everyone's all...
01:19:03
Speaker
What the fuck? It only, sadly, one episode. that real? Oh, yeah. Yes, it's real. I got goosebumps. Look. That'll be. Oh, my God, you did. That'll be the next thing that we cover on our LatchkeyVids, patreon.com backslash worst people. Wow.
01:19:17
Speaker
And then we get to see Mexican Steven Seagal doing high kicks. Oh, my God. He kicks over the microphone. this which I know that guy is like a celebrity real. only like five three He's really small to be kicking over the microphone. I'll throw a hip out. And he did look like Steven Seagal. He did. He did. The ponytail and the jacket.
01:19:33
Speaker
And he got enough. Esteban Seagal. Seagal. And I feel like he got enough screen time that he must be some sort of like and person that he's somebody would recognize. He's an actual musician. I bet you this band is real. And the director who somebody in charge was like, we got to give it a shot.
01:19:48
Speaker
i like him. Let's go to this bar and watch this guy kick over his microphone. They also have wrestling inside the bar. He also does the high kick and touches his, whoa, that does not look good. He does the high kick and touches his toes.
01:20:00
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. But he's limber. Yes. I'll do that shit and I'll throw out a fucking bone. I'm not, so yeah. um Estelle does tell Rosie Perez about the trap, but Javier Bardem refuses to. like He's like, it's fine. It's going to be complicated. Oh, he he lost his necklace, by the way. Yes. He had a necklace that was like supposed to be good luck.
01:20:20
Speaker
Protection. Protection from evil. Yeah. Yeah. Someone's ripped that shit right off during the ah police. It was a skinny D. Right before he got the the knife to the old ear and out the other ear and the headband. He has gots with him because he's still alive. He's surviving all of this. But he doesn't survive because he has no necklace.
01:20:42
Speaker
No, he becomes a Jaguar. Can I ask you guys a question? Are we all on the same page that we're also like, even though we know they're really bad people and we know what they're doing is pretty gross. love We want them to like do well.
01:20:54
Speaker
yeah We are rooting for them. is yeah Am I wrong? Because I always No, you just now know what it's like to be a Trump supporter. Oh. Where you know wrong. Well, God that's the only fucking way I will ever fucking know anything about that.
01:21:06
Speaker
I'm 100% joking. But please listen to the pod. That is not who Ashley is. No, and they don't realize he's bad either. And yeah, they don't believe they're bad. They're in denial. I just really wanted them to win. No, you are right. like I need an alternate ending. you Because it's a fucking love story. And you love the love story. The fucking is hot.
01:21:24
Speaker
Speaking hot, Herb Satisfied gets hit by a car. Oh, no. He's right across the street. He sees his daughter. Three, third person to get hit by a car. Well, second person, third car hit. But it's trash.
01:21:35
Speaker
Three car accidents, two people. You explain that. One of them was James Gandolfini. He sees his daughter right there and just... Badunk.
01:21:47
Speaker
Yep. Tossed into the air. Unlike James Gandolfini, he does not survive. he's Right in front of the Tucson Inn, which is still here, but defunct and gutted. He did a couple flips in the air, dude.
01:21:58
Speaker
Yeah. Oh, yeah. And then they do that you know thing where they let you see the... let like Confirm that they're dead because they do the little like... Oh, I didn't see him his And then the kids you know, the two, Luke and Leia, running off into the background out of focus. It's a very beautiful shot. It is, it is. I just think this movie's really cool.
01:22:17
Speaker
you? It is. javier bardem goes hooks up with a friend of his or his cousin whatever the one-armed guy that was uh they were in the marines together and i am yeah it's a wonderful it was a wonderful travel agency because i forgot yeah javier bardem said i was in the marines best travel agency in the world and then this guy uh when rosie prez like i'll go with you he like no i got this guy he's got one arm but he's an ex-marine yeah no such thing as ex-marine sorry he's a marine hoorah I don't think we can say it. I don't know if they say it.
01:22:45
Speaker
They do. Okay, good. We don't. Yeah, so he's meet up but he's meeting up with his one-armed friend who's going to help him out. Who's got early access to hentai. Yes. Patrick would be all over this. I really love this guy and his girlfriend.
01:22:58
Speaker
Just chilling on the couch, just getting stoned. Change it. All the jumping gives me anxiety. yeah They're jumping because they have superpowers. You don't get it. You're not watching anime right, bitch. It's like an early anime couple. Before it was like, you know, a thing. Oh yeah, this couple now would have a fucking channel on Pornhub.
01:23:18
Speaker
Big time. Big time. Big time. Let me fuck you with my stump. Stump fucking. That's on Pornhub. That's what I'm saying. You want to be terrified? I'm not going to tell you Chumma Wumba Stub Thumping? Is that what just happened over here? Stub Thumping?
01:23:33
Speaker
Nope. Stub Thumping. I get her to go down. She goes down again. Never gonna get me off. I don't go down. I get stumped down. I stump her down. She gets off again. It was Javier Bardem.
01:23:49
Speaker
um i Speaking of getting off, Estelle fucks Dwayne. ah yeah That's a thing that happens because she was a virgin. Now she's had sex. Rosie Perez told her the two best things are sex and killing people. She had a weird thing after Bardem killed President Reyes from Weeds where like they're in the they're watching the live band. They're watching Esteban Segal kick over the microphone and Javier Bardem is doing his fucking shaking, roaring thing.
01:24:14
Speaker
He's preaching to fucking Santorita. She goes from crying, screaming, to all of a sudden like... yeah oh that She doesn't know how she feels right Watching him that guy get stabbed in the face with the bottle, I think was the final straw for her. Yeah, she's broken. She's fully CPTSD. Do you know what this is? This is a prequel to Natural Born Killers. She grows up to be Juliette Lewis.
01:24:36
Speaker
Fucking respect. yeah Explains a lot. Yeah. And Dwayne is Woody Harrelson. Well, the big difference here is I i like this movie. They had the same hair. oh you know we've I think we've talked about that. You don't like that one.
01:24:48
Speaker
Wow. Give another shot one day. Strong, strong. I yeah i mean i was like, i' love this. I like Tarantino and stuff. It's like that stuff. And I watched it and i was like, i'm I'm shocked by it because it is kind of up your alley. i don't watch it again. also don't care if you don't like it. I saw it when I was like 16. Oh, watch it again. Or 18. See it one more time. But honestly, you're probably not going to change your mind. but'll Give it one more watch with an adult lens.
01:25:09
Speaker
You watch Natural Born Killers and I watch Miami Connection with Ashley. I'm into it. you will Do I get to watch Miami Connection? Of course. Can I be there for Miami Connection?
01:25:22
Speaker
ah You own it. Of course you're going to watch it. um Oh, James Gandolfini has this dude he's like that works for the DEA or the FBI or whatever that's supposed to getting information for him. This guy's fucking hilarious because gda it starts with Gandolfini doing this whole speech about like, look I've been hit by car twice. over twice yeah I've been shot. I got strangled. I shot a guy while I was getting strangled.
01:25:44
Speaker
My fucking last check bounced. don't want to fucking hear it. And I have hemorrhoids. I don't get paid to listen to your sob story. Yeah, and then the guy's like, look, I know you you, I didn't, nobody tried to, or what did he say? I didn't get hit by a car. No, like, no, nobody tried to shoot Look, I'm having a bad day. No one shot at me today, but I worked a double shift in front this computer. I want to go home.
01:26:02
Speaker
I want to go to sleep. Go to sleep. It is fair. have you guys ever had a job sitting in front of a computer? In 1997? No. Yeah, no, I was 12. I just never have. Well, not in 97. I'm not in 97. Yes, I have. Yeah, I have. It's fine. Any job. I'm like, I'll go home now. Right now. I will sit home all day and watch movies and shit.
01:26:20
Speaker
But then you're like, you have to sit in front of that computer for money. and I'm like, ugh. God. Because that's your relaxation. Yeah. That's what you do when you're done with work, not what you do for work. you just hate working. It's fine. that's Yeah. And that's okay to say. That's why bartend and I don't drink after work. Like, I'm just done with alcohol.
01:26:37
Speaker
Yeah.
01:26:41
Speaker
Oh, Javier Bardem is watching them fuck, too. Yeah. He's not even far away. He's not even trying to hide it. He's just straight up looking through the window like, what's up? Because Dwayne's like, they're watching. And she's like, good, fucking let him.
01:26:53
Speaker
Let him. He taught me what orgasms were. And Dwayne has not had sex. Or he had sex, well, one and a half times now. He had sex with a large lady. And then he had sex to not completion with Rosie Perez. Yeah, so one and a half.
01:27:06
Speaker
So when this, all of a sudden, this girl he's been dating, he said, I think for two years, she's like, I don't care. Let him watch. And he's like, yeah. Okay, anybody can watch. This is the second full time I'm having sex. Yeah. She also says, we might die later, so let's fuck. Let's get this done. Yeah, she's not wrong. I like that arc for her. She's not wrong.
01:27:25
Speaker
I love that character development. Also, women taking charge the bourgeois. Yup. but ah So Javier Bardem and old one arm go off to do the baby deal, and Rosie Perez lets the blondes go. We call them upstairs Lieutenant Dan. She gets a heart.
01:27:39
Speaker
Lieutenant Dan, you ain't got no arm. then You got magic arm. ah So Rosie does get she has like a heart to heart with Estella. And Estella's like, you fucking love him, don't you? And like, go fuck yourself.
01:27:55
Speaker
But she does. And so she's like, you know what, you guys? She knocks out ah one arm's wife. and she uncuffs them. She's like, to go be free. I'm going to go. She's like, you're going to go save them, aren't you? She's like, shut your face. Or die trying.
01:28:11
Speaker
ah You're already getting off easy, so don't push your luck, Blondie. the way, you said or die trying. She doesn't do either of those things. That's true. So the Blondies are gone. will live trying.
01:28:22
Speaker
They literally skip over where her father just died, unknowns to her. oh she doesn't know yet. She's going to get and be like, he died in Tucson? What time? I was right there. She doesn't know what day or time it is where she's at. all Right in front of the Tucson Inn? I've been there.
01:28:38
Speaker
i i Every time. I never shut up about all the places I've been. Tucson Inn? That's what they call Harvey Arbardem's sex tape. ah Actually, it would be the Tucson Inn and Out.
01:28:48
Speaker
Was it Rosie Perez? So, Javier Bardem is getting... Betrayed by his brother or cousin or whatever. Cousin. Cousin. They call each other brothers. Yes. His real brother, his movie cousin. Yes. yes Real brother, movie cousin. Go on. What if you made us watch, Ashley? don't know. This used to be a professional podcast. And Bertie Perez comes in and to help him, I...
01:29:09
Speaker
Okay, so somebody tells somebody they hate them. All I wrote here, I was so lost here. I'm not lost, but like note wise. right. So I started writing lines. It just so it was just says, I hate you. Say anything. It's here. Okay. Oh, I remember it's James Gandolfini sitting in the car with Alex Cox. Oh, yeah. And he's just sitting there like, I fucking hate you. And I'm going to get you knocked down to the lowest level. Like blah, blah, blah. I hate your stupid fucking face. I hate your stupid TV. i hate your earbuds. I hate your sunglasses. Did you say something? said nope I didn't say anything. Oh, okay.
01:29:40
Speaker
I'm going to have you busted down because i'm going to tell that you're a piece of shit that watches TV all the time, you stupid motherfucker. Did you fart again? You're getting busted down to beat cop. Also, you should probably see somebody that smells very bad. Yeah. Did something die in your asshole? Did you eat rotten eggs that were covered in sulfur?
01:29:56
Speaker
It smells like you ate rotten eggs. Did you chase it with a lit match? Boofing egg? Just boofing pickled eggs? Yep. Dude, you need to take a shit. yeah american I told you. Yeah, I do like that. but there's So they're doing the deal with Reggie. There's like a sniper who shoots all one arm. Sniper with a shotgun. Sniper with a shotgun. One arm fucking takes him out with a 38.
01:30:18
Speaker
You guys are we're condensing it down to just the lowest form of describing a person. yeah Well, it's not because he was not actually if he really had one arm, then it would be rude. Yeah, but he's just doing this shit. So it's like we all did when we were like realized we could do it when we were little. But we when we didn't know it wasn't cool to half a chicken wing. Yeah, I do want some wings, though. yes But he gets shot.
01:30:43
Speaker
This is when ah ah Rosie Perez gets there and he's like, look, he's grabbing my boob at all. Yeah. feel like she's grabbing a You're getting the full experience. That's my hand. I can't get my arm out of my arm. There you go.
01:30:56
Speaker
Look, it's magic. Ta-da. um But basically, he's like, there's no way out of this. He's like, he's telling his brother. He's like, either I'm going to kill you you're going to kill me. Or maybe his brother or cousin is telling him. cousin says, like, dude, what did you expect? It was you or me. had no other choice.
01:31:11
Speaker
There's always a fucking choice, dude. Which the movie I wanted was they team up and take on Santos and whoever else. Well, Santos is dead. No, that's Catalina.
01:31:22
Speaker
Catalina's dead. You're right. Santos is still alive. He's over there wearing a clown nose jacking off to a claw machine. He's into some weird shit, dude. But like Romeo, Reggie, who's the cousin, starts to let Romeo go or he just walks away. Look at me. It's the point blank, like holding the gun out thing, except for he doesn't end up firing it multiple times into the air. He fires it multiple times into Javier Barney. You've never pointed your gun at your cousin in and went, ah! We've all been there. We've all been there.
01:31:53
Speaker
And then Rosie Perez shoots Reggie. Gandolfini shows up and turns into a cowboy. Well, so, because we didn't talk about this. Harvey Bardem is obsessed with, is it Gene Autry? It's Vera Cruz. Gary Cooper. The movie's called Vera Cruz. The movie's Vera Cruz. It's definitely Gary Cooper. Burt Lancaster. Burt Lancaster, thank you. And Gary Cooper, he's obsessed with Burt Lancaster because he's got beautiful teeth. Yes. And a lot of riz, as the kids would He had hundred teeth in his mouth.
01:32:22
Speaker
And I heard he's got a nice, big, fat glizzy. And so he's got the dick of a camel, which means it has a hump in the middle. Oh, God. Wait a minute. For her pleasure. For her pleasure. For her pleasure. No, it'll feel good. But so he's obsessed with that movie. And he's like, look, dude, he does this thing and he dies by the hand of the law.
01:32:41
Speaker
That's why he turns into a cowboy. And your wife is the one that called it out. Because the the shitty deputy that has the glasses, like, beautiful. Lifting up his lip, Harvey Abrahams' lip so hard, was worried about the little part that attaches it to your gums. Or your smiley. Well, he's dead. Yeah.
01:32:57
Speaker
Well, but still, the actor is not. I was worried about the actor's lip. Yeah. But yeah, he he's like, look at those teeth. And I never made that connection before, so I'd like a thank you right now. You're welcome. I also had no other two cars. I'm really heavy ah number of watches on this film, and I never made that connection, and I'm really sorry.
01:33:15
Speaker
no i don't have a life. I try to find meaning in everything. You can ask them. i noticed the weird shit. I connect things that they're like, First time she's... Not the first time, I'm sorry.
01:33:27
Speaker
The first time in a long time she'd ever seen Star Wars, episode four. I was asking Derek, because he's a Star Wars fan, I said, trivia, do you remember Princess Leia's cell? And he's like, fuck no, and she's like, 2187. I was like...
01:33:39
Speaker
How did you remember that? Hey. I heard a number. Yeah, definitely, definitely heard a number. 2187. Yeah. Dolphinately, dolphinately. Dolphinately, dolphinately. 2187 of the cells, dolphinately.
01:33:50
Speaker
ah I don't know why. That's pretty much the end of the movie. We got Rosie Perez crying. Gandolfini sees her. Oh, walks crying in Vegas. Yeah, Gandolfini sees her and lets her go. Yeah, he's just kind of like that nod or hit a tick from getting hit by two cars. And he's just like...
01:34:04
Speaker
I think we're neglecting to mention that the second time he got hit by a car, he got thrown from the side of an 18-wheeler that was moving onto the dash of another moving car onto the road. it's like, oh, he got hit by two cars. My man's been fucking through it, bro. Dude, he's been through He's got face on his neck and shit. Yeah. He's like, you know what? You've done the least. Just go. don't ever want to see you again. you shot in the ear? No, I shot really close to my own ear. yeah you should see you should see the other guy yeah I can't control the modulation of my voice but yeah Rosie Perez is crying and we get a screaming Jay Hawkins song finally I'm lonely oh dude I was gonna be so pissed like don't waste a fucking screaming Jay Hawkins cameo yeah it's like having Tom Waits in your movie not playing a Tom Waits song right travesty
01:34:51
Speaker
It's a problem. Chains other chains. That's the end of the movie. That was the end of the movie. So guest first. So this is a recommendation, Yeah. you recommend the movie? Obviously you did. I personally love this movie. I have always loved this movie. I stand behind this film. Like I was somehow part of it.
01:35:09
Speaker
Yeah. I saw you in the background. Yeah. At the little girl's birthday party. I think it really ah helped kind of us set the tone for for like future films and what I would like in the future.
01:35:20
Speaker
If ah any you know my record is any indication of the kind of movies that I like, this really helped get in there the I mean, I noticed this chat between you. At least you and Derek have our very similar movies. guys are like kindred spirits. Maybe. We'll talk more. but yeah, I love this movie. i think it's i think if you are I think if you have any fucking taste at all. Even if it's bad. You'd agree.
01:35:43
Speaker
I don't think every average human is like, I love that movie, but I'm not saying... I think your circle of friends does. Yeah. I think the people you've surrounded yourself with choose this movie. Yes, and I love it yeah it's been so It's been really helpful for me to be able to show this film to anyone that would actually like have any interest in it. Nice. We talk about it. It is kind of a vulnerable thing when you show somebody a movie you love and the whole time you're sitting there like,
01:36:08
Speaker
Especially this movie. Oh, God. They're not laughing as hard as I think they should. oh they didn't see that part, but... You guys aren't into fetus trucks? Oh, my God. Just wait until my Patreon choice movie um for Mental Health Month. Or not Patreon, but main feed. Yeah.
01:36:23
Speaker
They're going to hate it. Which will it's I'm terrified. I will really be like, God. Oh, she's going to love the movie you say. Whatever it is. Welcome to the Dollhouse. Oh, yeah. I love that movie. I've seen that movie so many times.
01:36:34
Speaker
So many times. Yeah. They've never seen it. Don Wieners. Never seen it. Because you're boys. but And don't fucking understand. Boys drool. think they're hot shit. They're just cold diarrhea. Yeah, they're just cold diarrhea. we just watched another movie from that same director the other Yeah, we did. Happiness.
01:36:49
Speaker
Which also has child sex in it. Yeah, you don't. That's not a movie about being happy at all. A penis, ma'am. Oh, happiness. It's a good movie, though. I'm going to start with Jack. You have brought wonderful guests on, and I've fallen in love with both of them.
01:37:03
Speaker
oh Aw, that's so nice. I got the best friends. And a friendship love. Aw. I love it. ah Full recommend on that point. Wanna watch me cry? Full recommend. There's there's nothing. like I mean, I did have caveats. I did have Jack's Cavs.
01:37:18
Speaker
Yeah. but i I don't think you need them. I don't think you need them, but which it was wonderful having them. I think if I didn't have him I'd understand and follow more. It might make more sense if you don't have them. Yes.
01:37:31
Speaker
Yeah. Caveats might have hurt this. I don't think it would have. But this is not only is this a great movie just to watch, but this is a great movie to just have on in the background and be like, oh God, this part right now.
01:37:42
Speaker
Yeah. ah Because it's the whole fucking movie. I definitely recommend it. It's fast. like it's it doesn't It's two hours and ten minutes, but it feels fast. It not feel too tense. very good for, I mean, they're sexy.
01:37:54
Speaker
I'll just say this. If you don't like this movie, fuck you. Yeah. If you don't like this movie, fuck you. Look into the camera. Yeah, I liked I'm going to recommend it. was going to say, fuck you. It would have been okay. like it. I recommend it. All would have just been. It fits in with a lot of the stuff I watch.
01:38:10
Speaker
So it's just fucking madness. And people you know some people would watch it and be like, well, I don't like that, and I don't like that, because there's things that are... There are triggers. Yeah. what yeah i don't know the word I'm looking for, but trigger-y things.
01:38:22
Speaker
yeah We talked about some of them, not all of them. But like if you can't just watch a movie and go like, okay, this is a movie, then... you I don't know. These aren't the movies for you. So four recommendations. Yeah, big, big. Golf clap for this movie and our guest Ashley.
01:38:36
Speaker
Thank you so much. Definitely for Ashley. Thank you for having me. Cheers, babe. Cheers. Yes, and thank you for bringing it on a physical format. Yes. I guarantee you if we would have streamed it, it would have looked like shit. Physical media is king. When she asked, she's like... i think's like Should I bring 4K copy? like Let me just make sure Derek doesn't have it.
01:38:55
Speaker
You are my male counterpart. I've we've said this numerous times. This is Jerka's female counterpart. I don't know. It might be good. I think it's great. So if I need a day off.
01:39:07
Speaker
She can now fill in. Yay! Says you want to come over and watch movies? Yes. I do. we Next week, we are discussing house guests with our friend Bleep. Bleep. Welcome back, Bleep.
01:39:18
Speaker
um And if you guys want to watch it, and we've already recorded it, and it's funny, so tune in. i think he's totally put a smiley face over his face. There is something unprecedented unprecedented that happens in that episode. Yes, there talk about it after.
01:39:30
Speaker
Yeah, but you can watch it right now on Amazon or Apple. You can rent it for $4 or you can buy it for $18. Whoa. You know how I feel based on what I just said. Yeah. $18 for a digital copy of Sinbad? You should never pay $18 for a digital copy of anything. Fact.
01:39:46
Speaker
Yeah, but you can rent it for $4. So do that instead. There you um Of course, we have our Patreon, which we already mentioned, but I'll mention it again because, you know, Patreon.com slash worst people, $3 a month, bonus mental health episode, bonus latchkey vids episode, newsletter. You get to help us choose episodes.
01:40:04
Speaker
Other stuff. Do you know what other you get with being a patron? What other you get? The other you get early access to Han Took Shots First. That's true. Yep. And we're also doing stuff like giving away digital codes only to patrons.
01:40:18
Speaker
So tune in. Why am the one that always promotes your Han Took Shots First episode? Because you don't want to be on it. because you Because I remember. You're trying to get us to have a guest on there so you don't have to hear us talk about Star Wars. But this month's episode on Patreon for mental health is Demon Knight.
01:40:33
Speaker
Which, if you want to watch, then you do. when the boat yeah It's available on Starz. um And it's on Amazon and Apple for $4 $15. Or you can or you can buy The sweet ass Blu-ray.
01:40:47
Speaker
It's upside down. The sweet ass Blu-ray. Yeah. From Shout Factory. How major league two of you. um And then our Latch Q Vids episode this month is not Cop Rock.
01:40:58
Speaker
No, it's not, guys. We are taking a one episode break to talk about Heil Honey, I'm Home. We're going to Ashley some goosebumps, y'all. We talked about this earlier, so we're good. Can't believe it's real It's barely a real thing. It's barely.
01:41:12
Speaker
But of course, we have to thank Evasion for providing our opening and closing music. We have to thank our guest Ashley for being here. And we have to thank all of you for being wonderful listeners. Thank you, guys. Thanks for not turning it off if you've made it this long. That's it for this week. I've been Derek. I'm Whitney.
01:41:26
Speaker
I'm Ashley. I'm Jack. Good night. And go fuck he yourself. Oh. Yeah. yeah
01:42:02
Speaker
Mel Gibson's penis. Images. Images. There it is. Look at his penis. Look at it.
01:42:12
Speaker
It's like flat. Like somebody hit it with an acne. Why is his pubic hair giving off the bad signal? He's doing an Ernie. He looks like Sesame Street. Oh, he's not circumcised. No, he's not. No, because he hates the Jewish people. why is it so close up?
01:42:25
Speaker
Because I zoomed in on that fucking juicy hug. Well, I'm here to look at him against his penis. He's got bird eyebrows. You said, look at that penis. I zoomed in on the penis. He's wild looking.