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Ep. 270 – Reverend Russel Brand Crowned Sword Drill Champion
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This week we’re catching up on a few stories that have been in the news, including Russel Brand sharing his powerful testimony with Pierce Morgan, the very real and terrifying Iranian dolphin torpedo threat, and The Onion’s acquisition of InfoWars! Then we dive into some of our favorite subreddits, including r/christiandating and r/christianmarriage for some salient relationship advice including when it’s appropriate to use law enforcement as a means of teaching your wife Biblical submission. Enjoy the show!
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Transcript
Personal Struggles and Spiritual Journey
00:00:00
Speaker
We shared wins with our friends family and friends rather than wounds. The wounds went to counseling where they were could actually be healed. Over time, things changed. Out of respect for her, I distanced myself from the girl best friend, and my girl best my girlbest friend mutually accepted my choice because she wants me to be happy.
00:00:19
Speaker
Me and my now future wife went to church and repented for our fights, and she apologized for pushing me. We got baptized together. She realized venting to her friends about my political views was not wisdom. Oh, boy.
00:00:35
Speaker
Oh, boy. Dude, I knew there were racist undertones here, and he is a conservative for sure.
00:00:44
Speaker
Oh, man, I can't. I would love to know what his ah political takes are. But I mean, I guess I can guess. I can guess. You can guess. You sure can. It was emotional release that created division. His most sellier political view is um the Civil War wasn't about slavery. It was about states' rights.
Podcast Introduction and Casual Banter
00:01:21
Speaker
Hey everybody, welcome to another episode of Growing Up Christian. I'm Sam. And I'm Casey. And I might be, once again, for whatever reason, my body has continued to betray me into my late 30s, doing my best to hold back coughs during this entire episode. But that's what happens when you try to have fun. You go on vacation for a week and on the drive home, your body rejects fun. You can't enjoy yourself for too long in your late thirty s before your body rejects it fully.
00:01:53
Speaker
You're kind of a sickly little fella. Maybe you're not fat enough. I used to be, I used to not be, I like my immune system. I thought was so great. And I would, I even up until like a few months ago, I would still brag about it. And then I realized that I sound stupid because it's not true anymore.
00:02:08
Speaker
I have turned into a tiny Tim just constantly chronically ill. It feels, but no real ailments, you know, um I'd like to blame it on something like mold. Well, I wouldn't like to blame it on mold. Cause that would be a problem.
00:02:25
Speaker
Um, but yeah, uh, so yeah, you and I were both on vacation back to back weeks and, um, I came home from my vacation we got a lot of rain right before I left. So I was like, Oh my God. Like, you know, when you see your grass grow in the span of like 36 hours and you're just like, yep I'm going to have to deal with that. Um, like the day before we were leaving, I'm like, this shit just started growing. This is going to be a pain. um And so, ah yeah I got back and my lawn was quite quite lengthy.
00:02:59
Speaker
And so I go out to my shed. I'm like to go to start up my lawnmower. And as I was afraid of, I didn't actually, i look at I looked under the hood. I started up a couple times over the winter.
00:03:10
Speaker
um And then I go to start it and nothing happens. It's just nothing. um Which ended up being a good thing because then I'm like, well, let me check this thing out. So I took the engine cover off and mice had made a brilliant home in it. They really lived large in ah and a lawnmower mansion all winter long, apparently.
00:03:32
Speaker
Do you think that sometimes I wonder if there's... Yes, I think the mice are making this personal. Ever since they killed their brothers and sisters. ah it was Yeah. So, okay. So exactly. So sometimes I wonder if there's like a little mouse Knesset and they fund little, uh, mouse occupationists to go in and like settle human territory in hopes of driving them out like a lawnmower or a heater or, you know, just your shed just bringing, you know, 800 pounds of nuts and, and rotten fruit into your shed.
Lawnmower Mice and Road Trips
00:04:07
Speaker
Yeah. Little, ah little rodent pogroms.
00:04:15
Speaker
they build their but their house in the uh in the blade section because that would solve the yeah they're smarter than that but um yeah so i cleared it all out um and i mean it was just a dead battery like my battery was dead but i'm like thank god it was dead because if i started my lawnmower with all that shit in there i probably would have blown out my engine Dude, ah so one of our customers recently, it wasn't directly that, but um he had a
00:04:47
Speaker
they had a guy, he was like welding on something in the shop and he was doing it like very close to like, a i don't know, some sort of open fuel container or someplace where they had oil stored and stuff. And it like roasted the shop.
00:05:06
Speaker
Whole thing went up in flames. That's crazy. And he survived. Yeah, everybody survived. It just like burnt the shop big time. He just ran out like a fireball. i mean, I guess if it's a quick enough explosion, it doesn't.
00:05:20
Speaker
light you on fire exactly i'm surprised he's lucky his skin didn't melt with clothes or something that's nuts yeah i'm not sure how long it took for it to like build into a blaze but everybody got out it just like totally ruined half the shop and now it's a big insurance thing and everybody has to work out of different other stores within the group for the rest of the i don't know until it's all fixed what an and Will insurance even pull through for such an idiot mistake like that?
00:05:47
Speaker
I guess so. I mean, it sounds like it is just. Yeah, I guess it's liability, right? As a a business, you have probably a lot more liability insurance like that. It's accidental. It's it's negligent as fuck, but it's accidental.
00:06:02
Speaker
Yeah, it's true. so So, okay. So I just got back from, ah my wife and I drove, i had like a work thing in Northern Montana.
00:06:13
Speaker
So she came with me and we drove all the way there, which is, so we went to a place called Kalispell, which is like the nearest town to like the Western side of Glacier National Park. And it's like, okay.
00:06:26
Speaker
Almost Canada. It's way up there. It's 22 hours from my house, which seems insane. Yeah. Yeah, that's nuts. That's a lot. Dude, I don't think I have it in me to make drives like that anymore. It's probably like about the amount of time it would take for me to drive to your house, which is wild to think about. Yeah, yeah, it probably is. That is weird.
00:06:46
Speaker
It's unbelievable like how big some of those states are. Like you get to This country's too big. Let's fraction this bitch up. I'm tired of this shit.
00:06:57
Speaker
there's no way that we end up in the same section if that happens. No, no, that's, that's true. We wouldn't. Um, but maybe, maybe they'd have like a nicely agreed upon like open board. Uh, we know how we, well, some of them, some of these places, some of the fractions might not be so kind to open borders like that, but you know, kind of like the UK, right? You just kind of hop on a train and go. It doesn't matter.
00:07:19
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, pretty soon there won't be any airlines left to be able to get us from one place to another. As a Spirit just announced they've done JetBlue's like, yeah, we're basically billions behind and we're looking at losing another $1.4 billion dollars this year.
00:07:34
Speaker
So, you know, we're we're running out of airlines, but that's so we wouldn't have to do that as a drive. but It's crazy how your entire business model is a house of cards and then all of a sudden like one factor changes and boom, you're out of business.
00:07:47
Speaker
Yeah, well, up until now, they were all like, you know, they always had bailouts in their back pocket. Yeah, yeah, you can be a publicly owned company that just buys back your own stock anytime you and your executives need to like meet, me to you know, forecasts or whatever.
00:08:03
Speaker
Yeah, too big to fail. And let's not pretend like <unk> we're not going to go like completely without airlines.
Airline Financial Struggles
00:08:10
Speaker
It'll just turn into a monopoly and we won't be able to afford it. Yeah, that sounds about right.
00:08:15
Speaker
Just like everything else. So we ah we we stopped along the way in Wyoming, which is like one of my favorite places. And we've kind of we're we're at a point now.
00:08:28
Speaker
where we really like we know what we like to do on trips. yeah Yeah. So, you know, we knew basically what we wanted to do when we weren't there doing work stuff is we wanted to like fucking the bed look for rocks. Yeah. Yeah. Well, sure. Look for rocks and ah and birds. That's pretty much it.
00:08:48
Speaker
Yeah. That sounds like that sounds like what you're into. It's crazy. it's If you didn't go to a private school, you never would have dodged an autism diagnosis.
00:08:59
Speaker
Maybe not. yeah Maybe maybe they yeah they wouldn't have tried to pray it away in the same same way. I think we both have like some sort of opposite autism, April and I. Reverse autism.
00:09:14
Speaker
So, we i So I've probably I've talked it's not an exciting subject and I i feel like ridiculous bringing it up when I talk about it But I get so I get migraines. It's like the only health affliction that I have is I get migraines. And when I do, I get really sick and throw up and it's just a terrible thing. Right. So I've got a prescription that I take if I feel one coming on.
00:09:37
Speaker
And so we go out to this place called the Agate Flats, which is like in the center of Wyoming, kind of like south central Wyoming. There's nothing.
00:09:47
Speaker
I mean, there's nothing out there. Right. I thought there was a little town, you know, kind of down the road from it, but turns out there wasn't even that. So we go out to the Agate Flats and we're looking for rocks and stuff.
00:10:00
Speaker
big flat area kind of in between the mountains. And, um, you know, for one reason or another, like I start feeling like, ah, like I'm starting to get a headache, you know? So I take my prescription and, uh, depending on the scenario and how early I take it, like it can go a couple of different ways. Like I can go, I can feel like totally fine, like nothing's wrong. And I barely even noticed that I had anything for the rest of the day.
00:10:26
Speaker
Um, it can not work and I can just be like, brutally sick and throwing up the rest of the day or whatever, or something in between. So this particular time, it's the sex Panther of medications.
00:10:40
Speaker
Yeah, that's about right. 50% the time. But like it just messes up my whole system like when i when I have something like that. you know and i don't even really know how to make sense of it. but So I take my medication, and it's just – I'm not sick, sick, but like I'm not right.
00:11:04
Speaker
And I'm just like kind of feeling miserable and
Roadside Humour and Citizenship Policies
00:11:07
Speaker
stuff. So I sat in the car and slept for like, you know, an hour or something like that while April was looking around and just kind of tried to mill about and make the best of it and whatnot.
00:11:19
Speaker
But I'm like sleeping in the car and dude, my, my, just my body is messed up. and I'm like, my stomach is like gurgling and i just feel awful, you know? And finally, i've like I like, I kind of wake up from where I am. And we're way up on the top.
00:11:39
Speaker
So i wake up and I'm like, ah man, I don't feel good. i really don't. I, I, I really got I got to go to the bathroom. So I go out, April's like way off in the distance. So I walk out and get her. I'm like, all right, hey you want you want to head back down? Yeah, sure. So we kind of work our way back to the truck. And by this point, I'm like, God, I really got to go to the bathroom. So we get in the truck and we're like we're like 10 miles on a dirt two track, like way out in the middle of nowhere. And it's all planes between the mountains, you know, so you can see the the the horizon where you're supposed to go. And it's forever away. It's very far away. Yeah, yeah.
00:12:21
Speaker
rough roads it's all rocky and stuff and it we're we're hitting emergency status and i can't remember like is there a town down the road from where we're at like once we get back to the highway i can't remember and i've got no signal it's sos on the phone so there's nothing so like you could have called 9-1-1 with a bathroom emergency do they do They take bathroom emergency calls.
00:12:47
Speaker
I don't know. That would have been the time to find out. So we're driving it back and I just keep going faster and faster down these roads. and pretty i' tunes I'm doing, I'm doing 70 miles an hour down like a Rocky two track. like We're just bouncing along and it's a big dust cloud and stuff. And April's like gripping the, the, so you know, armrest and whatnot. And I'm like,
00:13:15
Speaker
ah fine um The whole time I'm like trying to search on my phone, on my phone, on the apps, on the map apps, like, you know, what's this town like this town next to us? Is there anything there? Is there anything there? Nothing. Finally, I get enough signal to prove that there's nothing within like 60 miles of where we are. And I'm like, oh my God, going to have to poop outside.
00:13:38
Speaker
And there's like, it's flat. There's nothing. Right. So like we were, we're going along and there's finally, there's like, we get close enough to like this boulder Ridge that I'm like, this is it. This is the last vestige of privacy here. You're going to come. I can see you on an open plane. You're like, don't look at me Don't.
00:14:00
Speaker
I have terrible balance too, so I would have to have April like hold my hands while I lean out. and I think at that point, your best situation is just to lay on your back with your legs in the air and let it fly.
00:14:14
Speaker
ah
00:14:18
Speaker
Just like reverse plank on a bucket.
00:14:24
Speaker
so i'm i'm like i can't i i gotta go i gotta go so i i had like a ah roll of shop towels it's sprinted up this rocky hill like all but but but this big rock and i like leaned on this rock i picture you just diving over it
00:14:51
Speaker
I just keep thinking like the whole time like somebody because there was other people around that were out there looking for rocks and stuff. And I just kept thinking of like somebody coming up, like walking up behind that boulder like two days later and being like, holy smoke, somebody should get that cow checked out.
00:15:12
Speaker
But yeah, so i didn't crap my pants out on the fruited plane and everything was fine eventually. What'd you do? What'd you do? The shop towels? Did you just let them leave them to decompose?
00:15:25
Speaker
I couldn't. I couldn't bring myself to just leave them there. found a little shopping bag in the truck and I packed them up and then I threw them in a McDonald's trash can where they belong.
00:15:38
Speaker
I respect that decision. I'm glad you didn't leave them there. yeah Yeah, that's evidence. Then they know it's... I mean, by all accounts, it was ah it was a sick cow. That would have given away the game. That's fantastic.
00:15:55
Speaker
Yeah, so... But yeah, ah Minnesota rules. I'm sorry, Montana like rules. It is awesome. I only went there once as a teenager.
00:16:06
Speaker
We had friends out there. I might have said this told this story before, but it's not much of a story, but they... um my family and I, we, all we flew out there. Uh, it was old family friends and they, that we knew that when we lived on Cape Cod, uh, Massachusetts and they, i don't know what it was that brought them out there.
00:16:25
Speaker
It was mostly the the guy, the husband, uh, they ended up getting divorced. I don't know if anything to do with their move to Montana or not, but he was just one of those like rugged individual types, you know?
00:16:37
Speaker
So they moved to Montana and he, he, he built their and like entire house essentially, like with some people he knew it was, it ah the the house was cool. And it was like, so when we went there, we flew into a major airport and they had to take this tiny little plane um to like a local airport. It was, it was like, the it was, it was still like,
00:17:00
Speaker
You know, I don't know how many it probably could hold like 50 people tops. Like it wasn't. It was one of those tiny ones. And the I just remember as a kid, being the turbulence was insane, dude. When you're driving, when you're flying a small plane like that, it's like that shit's getting rocked up there. And you feel like this can't be right. This isn't how planes are supposed to feel.
00:17:22
Speaker
um But then you said then you land and then you drive like an hour and a half to where they live. And you think you're there and you pull into their driveway and you drive for another 30 minutes up a mountain dirt road.
00:17:35
Speaker
Wow. Yeah, dude, it was cool. yeah in there Their house was like on the top of a mountain. And it was like you just stepped out on their like their back porch and it was just boom. Like, if I mean, just you're in a mountain. It was sick. It was a really cool spot.
00:17:51
Speaker
um And they were like in an area where just like, I mean, they're in a mountain. They're like, yeah, you got you can't really go out. That's you got to be careful going out certain times of day. mountain lions around. You can hear roaring at night sometimes like you don't leave the house without a gun kind of shit. um It was such a unique experience for someone who grew up where I did. And but yeah, I mean, I didn't see I didn't see. It's like we did a lot of sightseeing. We did. We did some. We checked out some spots, which what's the my geography is trash. What's the big like river that goes through Montana?
00:18:27
Speaker
Yellowstone. I don't know. Missouri? Missouri, yeah. I was going say it's one of the state rivers. We did this cool part of the Missouri River. um You know, swam across it. It was all kind of desert. It was cool. Montana was really neat. i didn't Like i said, I didn't see a lot of it, but it was just like, what a change of scenery. What a cool place to be. It's it's beautiful. I mean, even flying in, I remember just flying in and you look around and you're like, we're going to this little airport like with a small plane and you just look around and like, we're nowhere. We're like absolutely nowhere.
00:19:01
Speaker
Yeah. yeah There's definitely some very remote spots there, but I don't know. It's like a cool part of the Rockies because, you know, most of the like Colorado, New Mexico, Wyoming, even like a good portion of the mountainous areas are pretty dry.
00:19:19
Speaker
Yeah. So like it's pine forests and rocks and that's about it. Like, You know, the the stuff up there, it was like, you know, you had like the rocky peaks. You know, you got like 10, 11000 foot peaks around you, but then you're in like this huge, like green, fertile valley with lakes all over the place and a river and all that stuff. And I mean, it was so cool. Beautiful.
00:19:43
Speaker
It's incredible. Not a not a fun. ah That's definitely not a drive I would want to do very often, but like I think we'll go back at some point. Yeah. um I was trying to think of the thing I was thinking of before we hit record and it came to me and you mentioned close to Canada and that's what sparked it for me.
00:20:02
Speaker
And um I learned recently that um Canada in December of 2025 passed a bill that pretty much opens up the potential for claiming citizenship.
00:20:16
Speaker
It's a, You know, it used to be kind of like first generation, whatever the typical type of citizenship, like, oh, your parents are from Canada. Even if you weren't born here, you can claim citizenship.
00:20:27
Speaker
they They open that shit wide open. And even if you have a great grandparent who is Canadian, you can apply for a certificate of citizenship, which would allow you get a passport and be considered a citizen. And do you just have to serve two years in their military and take an ethnic person off their land.
00:20:48
Speaker
Well, if it wasn't for that second part, I'd say that'd probably be a very cushy experience. But I my great grandfather is from Canada and now I'm about to do a lot of ah research on my mom's side of the family's history because I finally have a clear exit strategy when this shit starts burning to the ground.
00:21:10
Speaker
I thought that was sick, though. that It's just like, if you can prove ancestry to Canada, they're like, yeah, you can. Maybe they're hurting for people. Maybe they need more. Maybe they need more people there. But for whatever reason, they did it. um Maybe I'll be a Canada boy someday. Hang out. Go a holler at Luke Wilson and he can take me to some cool gay bar and show me the good life.
00:21:32
Speaker
There we go. I have no doubt Americans will do their best to make them regret that. yeah I know of just a bunch of, a bunch of great Americans moving to Canada to try to like, uh, colonize it It's just, for they just, ah a new attempt at colonization.
00:21:51
Speaker
At first, dude, my first thought was if you, if you got, okay, so I ended up looking it up. at I first, I feel like I was told recently that the United States doesn't recognize dual citizenship and that might just vary by country. Um, yeah,
00:22:06
Speaker
but they do recognize it, I guess, based on my Googling. I didn't do an extensive amount of research. They do recognize it, at least for Canada. so But I was like, if ah if they didn't recognize it and they could make a change, you know maybe they decide you have to choose your allegiance. But I'm like, is there a downside to becoming a Canadian citizen if in the event that – because we're clearly on a watch list now, right? I'm a – We've spoken out against the government. We are now domestic terrorists, according to our government's policies.
00:22:38
Speaker
And I'm like, if they wanted, could they be like, oh, gotcha, bitch. Now we can just deport you to Canada. Like, it doesn' that that's where you're technically a citizen from. I don't know. um Does Canada extradite? Because maybe Russell Brand should check that out. Yeah, I know, right?
00:22:55
Speaker
It's ah but yeah, I thought that was cool. um But anyway, ah unless you had some last minute things to address, I have a fun clip for us. First off, did you see the clip of Russell Brand on Pierce Morgan?
00:23:11
Speaker
Oh, my God, dude. It was embarrassing. Oh, it's so funny to watch somebody crumble. It's almost as much dead air as Erica Kirk in that recent clip of her MK Ultra momentarily breaking.
00:23:30
Speaker
Dude, the shills are having a bad spring. It's just bad news for them left and right. But watching... So if you haven't seen the clip, you've got to look it up. But Pierce Morgan had ah had Russell Brand on, and they talked about...
00:23:46
Speaker
you know, his, his allegations. what I mean, is he convicted now? Is that, uh, I don't know where he's left with the court stuff.
00:23:56
Speaker
He's, I think he's still got it ahead of him, but like, I mean, it doesn't look good.
Russell Brand's Legal Issues and Political Skepticism
00:24:02
Speaker
45 allegations he has to, you know, blow through. And they also talked about his faith, quote unquote.
00:24:11
Speaker
And i mean, he flipped to Christianity. Like as soon as the the legal pressure started to ramp up, like he's like, I'm a born again Christian. His book is called How to Become a Christian in Seven Days.
00:24:25
Speaker
Yeah. How to make $7,000 per post from the Daily Wire. Yeah. He literally posted so much, he put the Daily Wire out of business. Posted so many like COVID conspiracy videos that the Daily Wire is going bankrupt over paying his legal fees. there And he's trying to... Okay, was it Megyn Kelly that had him on too? That was like...
00:24:49
Speaker
You go back a couple of years and she's like, if he had sex with a 16 year old, yep I'm done with him. And then she sucks so bad. And then he's like, yeah, I had sex with 16 year old, but that's the age of consent in England and the UK. And oh my God, dude, speaking, I have to sitting, sitting,
00:25:10
Speaker
Oh my God. I'm sitting here and a a mouse just ran out from under my couch with a cheese ball in its mouth. I can't get away from it.
00:25:22
Speaker
I got mousetraps down here. What the fuck? You also have rogue cheese. Did you bait the mousetrap with cheese balls? ah No, apparently I need to. That one's been down here from ah for a minute from my ah like last time my kids were down here playing.
00:25:38
Speaker
And he found it. well That was, oh my God. You got to choke the complex carb supply. i know ah they'll have to They'll have to go to the mousetrap for food.
00:25:48
Speaker
I think the problem is I accidentally left my light on in my basement all night. So like from, they could probably see it from the bulkhead, you know, just, uh, beckoning them.
00:25:59
Speaker
Oh my God. These things never go away. Anyway. So Russell brand is being questioned by Pierce Morgan about his faith and really like Pierce Morgan's kind of a douche, but like he was not asking anything like disrespectful or out of bounds. Like it's very reasonable to be like, Hey, um,
00:26:17
Speaker
why all of a sudden after you're in trouble do you become a Christian and what does it mean to you and tell me more about your faith like tell me some details about your faith so one of the questions he asks him is hey you you brought a bible into the uh the court your court hearing and you were like looking through it during the the proceedings or something like what what portion of the bible were you looking at during that process or during that whole thing which he could he could Brand could have easily been like, man, I was really stressed out during the whole thing. I i was reading a bunch of things. I don't remember exactly what.
00:26:55
Speaker
That would have been a reasonable answer. But instead, he's like, he's like, I'll tell you what I was reading. I'll tell you I've got it right here. i was he kept saying I was reading from Isaiah Isaiah. He kept saying Isaiah, which i don't know if that's British thing or if that's just ah if that's a two Corinthians sort of thing. Yeah, I'm not sure.
00:27:18
Speaker
But anyways, there is like there's literally like two minutes of dead air while Russell b bla Brand flips through his Bible, trying to locate the book of Isaiah and the specific scripture that he was reading at the time. And it i love it.
00:27:36
Speaker
Hearing the flipping of like the thin Bible pages, like it's so funny. and And it had already been pretty contentious like before that point. So Pierce Morgan just kind of like sits back and lets him like just he just sits back with a grin on his face and lets him like search fruitlessly for this verse that. Yeah, I mean, there's almost no chance he read anything from there anyways.
00:28:02
Speaker
And he walks in like with this deep V and his nipples hanging out. Right. He's just he's not a serious person. do this podcast i forget what podcast was listening to this week but they were like making comments about his uh his deep fee going on to defend himself from like rape accusations or whatever and they're like well all those shirts start out as normal tees but that's just from the women fighting back oh
00:28:28
Speaker
ah those are Those are defensive stretches.
00:28:38
Speaker
Yeah, no, he's ah he's just another pathetic griff. It's crazy. it's It's actually unbearable. Because, like, there's a way... And no one does this. No one does it a way that's believable. When all these people, like, turn towards faith in the wake of accusations, it's always...
00:28:57
Speaker
It's always oversold. You know what I mean? Big time. Like, and maybe it's maybe you have to Maybe that's part of the strategy. like ah He's probably going to have team of strategists at this point trying to save his ass. You should fire him. yeah yeah like i don't know who's bought like I don't know if some of these right-wing people are, but I don't know like who really buys it or takes it seriously. um you know Maybe with the right clips on Fox News, it sounds more believable, but like if you follow him on social media and you see his the prayers he posts, it's like,
00:29:31
Speaker
One of the things he he prayed, he asked if he could pray for with Pierce Morgan or for Pierce Morgan before their interview even started. There's a still of Pierce Morgan's face looking dead ass into the camera while like Russell Brand has his like hand on shoulder. That whole it's like he just he over he's overselling it so hard that it makes it feel more like a lie.
00:29:52
Speaker
And that whole interview, he was like getting mad at Pierce for being combative. And Pierce was like, I'm not being competitive. You, you're the one that agreed to an interview. I'm literally just interviewing you. I'm asking you normal questions that anyone should ask, but he's, I mean, obviously he can't hack that. Cause I think because he's like the ah but Ben with on Pierce Morgan, like he's, he knows Pierce Morgan. Like he's been interviewed by Pierce before he, He was on an interview circuit trying to get like fluff pieces.
00:30:23
Speaker
And most people gave him that like Tucker Carlson gave him that Tucker Carlson selling his book. And that's the, so like, and this is why people, this is why even when I come to an, ah ah when I'm in agreement with Tucker on something like the Iran war right now, you go, I'm not, I'm not falling for it, dude. I, that's advantageous to my goals.
00:30:44
Speaker
So i will i will use clips of Tucker Carlson to post or share, and i and I hope that Tucker's belief about this is changing the minds of people I know who like Tucker Carlson. But, like, I'll use that as advantageous, but I don't – I'm not – I'm not buying it, you know, like, no, I don't, I don't trust you.
00:31:08
Speaker
I don't know if I'll ever trust. I mean, he was just in an interview with, was it who that was at the New York times sat down and interviewed him. And he, he, he did the whole thing that he did previously of like, yeah, I mean, I, brought people to this. Like I went to bat for Trump. Like I agreed with a lot of his policies. Um, and then they asked him about the leaked texts. Um,
00:31:32
Speaker
Whereas like, I hate this guy. I can't wait to be done with this guy. And it's like, that doesn't sound like someone who like, this was back in 2016 that these texts were done because that was, it was leaked during the Dominion, um the Dominion voting ah ah court case. Right. Yeah. And so like,
00:31:53
Speaker
it's like, dude, you're not an honest person. You're telling people that you believed in him, in his messaging, but in the sidebar, we're telling people who hated him and your response to it is very like, well, yeah, I mean, there were some things where I wasn't sure about, but it's like, but fuck you, dude, because you went to bat hard for him and for 2024. And like, for you to say that in 2016 or whatever it was, whatever those came out, but between 2016 2024, it's like,
00:32:21
Speaker
dude like you In the way he tries to like gloss over it and make it sound like his typical... like well you know but matt like He tries to sound reasonable. he tries He has this tone that makes it sound like you're an actual idiot for thinking any other way than he does.
00:32:36
Speaker
And you just go, i don't buy it. it's like and And this is another one. like Okay, and now you're selling tucker carlson's but i mean you're selling ah Russell Brand's books. like Dude, you're not a real serious person. You're just...
00:32:50
Speaker
I think that's the lesson of our time here is, is that you cannot invest in these people anymore. No. And it's, the it's whether you're talking about like these like political pundits, like Tucker Carlson or, um,
00:33:05
Speaker
God, any number of them I mean, Alex Jones is the most ridiculous you know a version of that. But Megyn Kelly, all of them, like whether you're talking about them or you're talking about these politicians who like espoused all these like leftist values and stuff, but then continually voted over and over again to keep sending your arms and stuff to Israel, you know never stood up in any sort of meaningful way to that, which is actual like death and destruction. like You can't invest in these people. You you use them.
00:33:35
Speaker
in the same way that they use their their supporters or their audience. And you never have to espouse them as anything more than just like a useful tool for whatever you want to get done for now.
00:33:48
Speaker
You know, you don't you don't need Russell or like Tucker Carlson to be an honest broker for him to be useful. But you also can't like... let that lull you into thinking that he is one because he happens to be like saying the right words about whatever particular thing is going on right now. Like, right.
00:34:06
Speaker
Right. And he's a vibe writer. So give him the right vibes to ride, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Enough people change their mind. He's going to like, Oh, in a good direction. And that's away from Trump. So yeah, his approval rating is tanking.
00:34:21
Speaker
Yeah. So things are good. Just need to keep going that direction. the only people right now things are really bads but yeah The only people right now in politics that I really believe in as genuine, honest individuals um that are making big names for themselves is James Tallarico and Graham Plattner.
00:34:43
Speaker
Those two, i think, like, because you see, like, the way that the right the left, but sorry, not even the left, that the Democrats, as the Democratic establishment tries to smear them.
00:34:55
Speaker
And like, I saw one today on Graham Plattner and people were like, is is anyone getting Fetterman vibes? And it's like, not really. No. Like, and I get, I get the concern, but there were, there were other things going on with Fetterman even prior to his election. Um, and,
00:35:15
Speaker
like I don't know yeah I don't know the backstory for Fetterman but I know like someone like Graham Plattner was like he has a track record locally in Maine of really trying to make the world a better place for people in it um on a low yeah on a local level and he was approached to run and he was like I don't think I'm interested in that and then he ended up changing his mind like ah There's good interviews with him out there. Actually, a really good one is Jon Stewart's podcast. Jon Stewart just had Graham Plattner on it. Everyone should check that out if you're curious about Graham Plattner. Not that it matters technically because you can't vote for him if you don't live in Maine, but you, I mean, his fundraising has blown everybody else out of the water. He's tried to have been completely sidelined by the Democratic establishment because of his criticism of Israel. Like, and those are the things you want to see. Like, where's your money coming from?
00:36:05
Speaker
Oh, grassroots, small dollar donations. I'm in like, there's just, there's tells. And and at this point there's like, ah if, if you're taking big money, corporate money, PAC money, like even if you're saying what I want you to say, I'm, I'm, I'm taking what you say as truth with a grain, as with a grain of salt. Like, I don't, I don't know what you'll do once you get in.
00:36:29
Speaker
Like one example is like the, the woman who was just, I think she was elected as governor of Virginia. She, it's kind of like the opposite of what I'm talking about, but it's still a concerning trust issue for politicians today is, um you know, she ran on more like centrist Democrat shit. And as soon as she was elected, she started running like leftist shit.
00:36:51
Speaker
And you go, oh, that's a win. But at the same time, you got to be, I don't know. Like, I i just, I do want honesty from people. I don't, People don't want the bait and switch like that.
00:37:04
Speaker
um I mean, the hope is I think leftist politics are a better solution. And if you can provide people with a better life, then they might then they'll wake up and be like, oh, actually, things are better.
00:37:16
Speaker
But I mean, as we've seen time and time again, like, you know, ah going back to Tucker and then I'll wrap this out. Like one of the things that he said on his New York Times interview was like, oh, you know, I went for Trump because I knew it was a I knew for a fact would get in a war with Iran if a Democrat was elected, if Kamala was around. elected. It's just like, dude, that's such bullshit. Because look at look at every war that's happened in the past 40 years. like It's all Republicans getting involved in the Middle East. It's never done. That's not something that was on the table.
00:37:50
Speaker
So it's just like... even even Even when you look at like the economy growth, when you look at job growth and job decline, it's like, um whatever I have a million gripes with the Democratic Party, but like better things happen under them. And despite the raw data that shows job growth and less less in interventionist strategies overseas, um the people on the on the right don't don't don't care, right? Yeah.
00:38:20
Speaker
And this is the first time in our lives where like things have shifted right throughout our lifetime, like better economy, worse economy. But this is kind of the first time we're like staring down the barrel of a fucking gun in the past 30 years. And it's like people are feeling it. 70% of farmers can't afford fucking fertilizer right now.
00:38:42
Speaker
Yeah, it's a disaster. It's a disaster. i mean, i think we're we're literally watching like, like ah America was a declining empire to begin with, but we've just like, but we did a speed run of the last like 50 years of decline. We're going to do it in four.
00:39:00
Speaker
I know, dude, it's nuts. Like Petrodollar, know, NATO, all of that stuff up in smoke probably as a result all this. Maybe not, who knows, but.
00:39:11
Speaker
Our GDP being wrapped up in AI entirely. Again, prediction markets being out all of control. It was like a complete like game changing, like world destabilizing force anyways. And then we're going to do that at the same time as we completely like undermine US global position in the world.
00:39:32
Speaker
But on the slight topic of... ah you know Yeah, let's do some fun. and International politics, politics
Media Absurdities and Infestations
00:39:40
Speaker
international politics. This is a quick one, ah but I saw this clip today, and eight it's so funny. It just like what ah Corporate media needs to die. i can't deal with the level of stupidity that we're seeing and and the on a daily basis. It's just...
00:39:58
Speaker
It's just shit run through a propaganda machine. And this one actually, instead of completely disappointing me, made me laugh. So I just want to share it with you.
00:40:10
Speaker
os Have them go dark and still deliver that oil to China. I mean, there's a physical blockade. They they literally cannot do that right now. This is a physical blockade. They're not able to to send their oil and the resources to to China. And a vast majority of their oil experts were going to BSE to give you a sign of the desperate measures they're contemplating.
00:40:33
Speaker
The Wall Street Journal reported today that they're contemplating measures like suicide dolphins, you know, dolphins equipped with mines to try to go after U.S. ships. So that's not a measure which projects real strength.
00:40:47
Speaker
Wait, I'm sorry, you have to, how would that even work? This has just been discussed in the past by the Iranian regime that, you know, they want to strap bombs to dolphins, the dolphins with, with mines to, to go after us ships. Now that's, that's a pretty crazy asymmetric tool, but this is some of the measures that are being reported right now.
00:41:08
Speaker
I mean, do you think that they could actually try if they actually tried that, what would that say about their desperation? Well, this is something that they've thrown out in the past to show the various options they have at their disposal. But again, this is not a show of a country which which is strong. You don't contemplate those kinds of measures when you're strong. Who is this douchebag?
00:41:31
Speaker
ah Let me see. It is Kareem Sajdapur, senior fellow at Carnegie Endow, contributing writer at The Atlantic.
00:41:43
Speaker
Oh, perfect. Perfect. ah Even the response of her is like start of a, of a strong country. It's like, shut up. You moron. the The response of that woman of the talking head or whatever, this, that was CNN, by the way. Um, her response is like, well, I mean, what would that show about their desperation? And you go, Oh, you, you weren't actually surprised by that. You walked into this interview knowing that that was going to be said. And that was your line. You were fed that line.
00:42:13
Speaker
Because it's propaganda. Oh, well, is that how anybody would react to that idea? Right. You, you want your CNN's goal there is to project that Iran is desperate. And I i just talking about suicide dolphins is it's,
00:42:30
Speaker
It's such a desperate. Look, if this ends up happening, I'll eat crow. All right. I'll I'll publicly apologize, but it's not. How long does it take to raise and train a dolphin to ah to, you know, drop a grenade on a boat?
00:42:46
Speaker
I don't know if you saw recently, but they fired some warning shots near U.S. s naval warships that are blockading the strait. And it's like, they act they they every day on the news, they act like Iran's out of money and missiles. And it's like...
00:43:02
Speaker
yeah Why are you doing this? Oh, because we are. Because we are. Like, we're the ones who are desperate. We're so desperate that we're creating propaganda campaigns about... like That's the desperation, that we're talking about suicide dolphins on CNN. They have, like, a nearly unlimited... For all intents and purposes, they have a nearly unlimited supply of drones and and domestically produced missiles that have already, like, ground the American war machine to ah to a halt. Why would they need suicide dolphins, you morons?
00:43:34
Speaker
It's just the same crap over and over again from these like pro-war think tanks and stuff like that. you know Like, oh, any day now. I mean, they're their country's falling apart. Their economy's going to implode any day now. It's like they've made more money and sold more oil since the war started than before. I don't even remember the statistics, but like, dude, they...
00:43:56
Speaker
the The whole global war or oil you know market is is in shambles. And like we're not willing to bomb Chinese vessels coming out of the Strait of Hormuz.
00:44:07
Speaker
They have a direct deal with Iran. The Strait of Trump. I'm sorry. I think you forgot that it's been renamed. That's right. Dude, the the flailing is so intense.
00:44:19
Speaker
Yeah, but now i realize that you just misspoke. We're on the same page now. Yeah. Yeah. yeah Yeah. the The Gulf of Oman is now the Gulf of Donald. So i think both sides of Iran covered.
00:44:32
Speaker
I think they've made more money off of the United States after we lifted sanctions when our oil crisis got so dire that I think they've made more money off of us than they've spent blowing up our shit.
00:44:43
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. It's like, oh when you, when you completely upend the oil markets, like ah oil is more expensive and, you know, places like Iran and Russia, if they can still get vessels out, if they can still get oil out, they're going to make more money than ever before. It's just a fact of the matter.
00:45:02
Speaker
And it's like, these are the same people that have been saying for like four years now that the Russian economy is in shambles and that the people are going to rise up and overthrow Putin. They're the same people who are like, Putin may actually already be dead. Experts speculate, you know, like just over and over again, we get this same like desperate propaganda push, you know, and I'm so desperate. of it That's the desperation that talking about how the country that you're losing to is desperate is the actual act of desperation.
00:45:34
Speaker
Uh, what's, uh, what's gas out by you now, my friend, I'd hit $4 a gallon today. Hey, nice. We're already over four. I, I, I've seen it for like four 40. It sucks. I saw it for four 50 in Denver and that's the highest I've seen so far. It's nuts. dude It's bad, but,
00:45:53
Speaker
All right. We don't need to keep going down this political rabbit hole. It's endless as we've ah talked about before. And as we fall into these, these pits of despair, um i know you brought a couple of fun, and fun topics for us. So let's shift from our ah political circle jerk and move on to something more fun.
00:46:16
Speaker
Yeah, so, okay.
00:46:21
Speaker
There's a... I was picking around through through the Reddits today, and just the the level of insanity... You have a six cents for Reddit. You...
00:46:33
Speaker
you ah you you Whatever it is about the way that the subject lines are written, you just kind of have your nose to the grindstone on that shit. Because ill you'll say some of the headlines and I'm like, oh, I i scrolled past that because I didn't think there was a lot of meat there. and Maybe you click on it and you read through every one of them.
00:46:52
Speaker
I look for like kind of juicy juicy titles. But whatever it is, whatever it is you're doing, you you you have a way of honing in on the strange. Yeah, and i I think what's funny is like...
00:47:05
Speaker
When you look through these, the dating and the marriage ones, I don't know. You know, over time, like, when you're married for a long time, you just, like, you go through all of these stages, you know, where, like, yeah times when you're on the same page, times when you're not. I think everybody has a like, probably has a point at which they, like, think everything's going to fall apart and it's all over and stuff like that, you know, and it's just...
00:47:34
Speaker
It just depends on how, you know, people react at that point and stuff. But it's funny watching, like reading through these because you see people at all these varying stages, but they assign such like spiritual significance to them.
00:47:48
Speaker
Yeah, totally normal things that everybody goes through. But for for them, it's like, you know, just warfare where where I don't see God's hand in, the you know, this fight that we had over the dishwasher or whatever.
00:48:01
Speaker
Yeah, and dude, I actually got a little bummed out going through some of ah True Christian Reddit today because i i empathized with a lot of it. Like I hear it and I go, dude, I just want to shake you and tell you to wake up.
00:48:17
Speaker
And obviously that doesn't work, but I got, it was like people are like, in actual despair. And they're just like, i why can't I hear God? Why doesn't God talk to me?
00:48:28
Speaker
and I remember those moments. And it's like, it's truly awful to be in that, to but to be in a culture that, that talks in a way that makes you believe that, you know,
00:48:40
Speaker
in your most desperate times because you've heard every guest preacher, every guest youth pastor talk about the way that they heard the voice of God when they were at their bottom. And it's like you hear these people on Reddit talking about it and you're like, dude, I i i want to i want to give you the number for suicide hotline. I want to give you the number for help. Like I truly, I read that and I hear the despair and I can empathize with it entirely.
00:49:09
Speaker
And it sifting through some of that to try to find something funny. I'm like, like today I was like, this is just really disappointing. It's also funny reading like relationship oriented posts because you can like it would more mice.
00:49:24
Speaker
Yeah. Time out. Hold on. Sorry about that. ah Turns out a mouse can jump a lot higher without a cheese ball in its mouth. And he jumped up my couch, the one across from me, and went into the cushion. So I took all the cushions off.
00:49:40
Speaker
I have the like the have a heart traps because people in my house don't like killing mice. And also I shared my experience with a regular mouse trap blowing a fucking mouse's brains out. And I didn't love that. So I took all the cushions off and I put the trap right in front of where he is. I'm hoping he goes into it.
00:49:58
Speaker
And then I can release him into the wild so we can come back here in like, you know, 48 hours and wreck havoc again. But anyway, I derailed what you were saying. You ah correctly analyzed the look on my face. um it When you said more mice, it was a ah yeah, I don't know. I don't know why I have such visceral reactions to mice.
00:50:25
Speaker
They're cute. They are kind of gross to have in your house, though. Yeah, it's just being here. I was just like, it's shocking. It's I don't like it. oh and have you tried? I don't want their scratchy paws on me. Things what?
00:50:38
Speaker
Have you tried those Sonic things that you plug into the wall? No, I haven't. I'll send you a link. I got some of those because I saw some mice around my house and I got those and I haven't seen any since.
00:50:49
Speaker
Really? I got to put some in my garage then and down in my basement. But yeah, I'll send you a link. Anyway. But yeah, like it's just funny reading one of these and then being like, wow, I would sure like to hear the other person's perspective on this problem. Yes, dude. This is kind of one of those.
00:51:06
Speaker
This sounds by all accounts like two people who have just not learned to live together and to like how to how to be in the same house together all the time. And it escalated to an insane point.
00:51:18
Speaker
um So the post is by Careful Confusion 75, and it's called Advice Called the Cops on My Wife. That sounds like a throwaway account.
00:51:29
Speaker
i I would throw it away if I were him. Called the cops on my wife. That's nuts. This is going to pretty vulnerable post. I'm not looking to make myself look like I did nothing wrong. I wish I kind of didn't escalate things, which already we're we're preloading the suppositions here, I think. Yeah. It's so bizarre. My wife generally is very moody.
00:51:54
Speaker
All right. That's two red flags. Yeah. She's usually very happy and generally chipper in public. And we do have a good, a lot of good times together, but I just feel like I'm always annoying her and getting the brunt of her anger and moodiness. It just feels like walking on eggshells or in all honesty, it feels like the majority of the time is like, this is,
00:52:16
Speaker
This and not good. So this person's grammar is also bad. So bear with me. They typically are. That's a reoccurring theme. Known each other 13 years in school.
00:52:27
Speaker
you Right. Known each other 13 years, married almost nine, which that part is kind of nuts because I feel like ah I wouldn't have guessed that from the rest of this post.
00:52:38
Speaker
now right Now we have one toddler, two, and she is pregnant with a second 19-ish week, so I know that I need to be extra patient with moodiness. Oh my God. Just terms, you know, that are interesting.
00:52:51
Speaker
Over the years, we've had these bouts of issues, but there has been but there has been when it gets escalated, she will throw a lot of stuff breaking. Okay. I don't know how to make any sense of that sentence. Okay.
00:53:04
Speaker
She throws a lot of... She breaks stuff and she when she... She throws stuff and breaks it. That... Excuse me. That is... That... Once you escalate to that point, that's a little extra. Yeah. um For sure. But I also, real quick, want to just...
00:53:22
Speaker
stop on the moodiness thing again i think it's funny that like i don't know if women have the same kind of conversation about the moodiness of men but i feel like it's funny that like that's because the women moody whatever that's a a sexist trope that runs strong in in society's bloodline here but yeah big time I know a lot of moody bitch ass dudes. I know a lot of dudes who, when they don't get what they want or the time that they want to do the things they want to do, get the grumpiest fucking faces and are just like, wait wait wait and like I deserve everything. It's like it, it takes a different form in men, but it is moodiness to the highest degree. Yeah.
00:54:09
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. It's like that. I could be. I'm not. I'm not. I'm. I am a moody person. There are days where I'm like on top of the world. And then there are days where I'm like, it's seven o'clock, kids. Everybody should go to bed. and they're like, what the fuck?
00:54:23
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, it's it's just the way people are like some people are are not they're not good about not taking out those feelings on the people around them when they're feeling that, you know? Yes. Which is a that's a people thing, not a one gender sort of deal.
00:54:42
Speaker
Right. But, ah so he's going on, he says, so she throws stuff when she gets angry. Not good. You shouldn't do that. Yeah, not great. Especially when you have a toddler. Like, that's not... I mean, in my line of work, I have kids talk to me about their parents' fights and how...
00:54:59
Speaker
their one parent threw things and broke the TV and blah, blah, blah. Like, it's not good to listen to a child explain to you what domestic violence looks like. No.
00:55:11
Speaker
It's upsetting. It ruins my day. Not as bad as it ruined their night, but... So he says, just to show how, again, I'm sorry about the grammar. Just to show how dumb what was actually fought over. She in the kitchen says, oh, and you never ate the leftovers, two words.
00:55:31
Speaker
Which I think means you never ate the leftovers. She went to this health food shop and had like a little bit of oatmeal left and gave it to me earlier, three to four hours maybe. So like we're already like kind of setting this up is like, can you believe how dumb it is that she got mad over it? And he's about to call the cops on his wife.
00:55:51
Speaker
Is this ah you it make the grammar is so bad that it makes you wonder if English is their second language? I don't think so. I think they're and that's what's on it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I agree because I feel like the grammar mistakes are not.
00:56:06
Speaker
like typical of that as someone who like, usually it's missed. It's like just because of the way syntax works, it's like, um, ah a missed, like maybe some missed verbs because they're not implied or like, it's not written like that. It's written more like a dumb person, but yeah, I want to qualify it. Cause we will continue to call this person an idiot.
Relationship Dynamics and Public Reactions
00:56:29
Speaker
Uh, but in, if in fact English is their second language, then they're not. And, uh, you can ignore everything we say. So she gets mad because he she said he didn't eat the leftovers. She then said how wasteful I am and I never eat leftovers.
00:56:43
Speaker
This is so annoying because I actually was going to eat that along with other leftovers I had for dinner. She throws it away and I and said, well, it was left uncovered. Now it's gross. And in the trash, it went.
00:56:54
Speaker
Some things, some things it feels like just out of spite, but then it turned into I never eat the leftovers on and on and on. And to be fair, a long time ago, yes, sometimes I would leave leftovers, whatever, since she told me how annoying that is. i have always tried to finish leftovers or just throw them away and clean them out. So I asked her what exactly lately i had wasted and she said it doesn't even matter. So she would never give me a specific. That was all one sentence. Very frustrating.
00:57:26
Speaker
Did these people get married when they were 12? I don't know, dude. It doesn't make sense to be this old and acting this way. Yeah, that's what I mean. get think If you're 20 and you're having these problems, it makes a little bit more sense. So I'll spare you the boring back and forth here. But basically, he goes on to say that um it all revolves around the fact that she did a deep clean on the fridge, which he said when she goes into a deep clean, she does it really well. But he does most of the housework himself. Again, i would like to hear the other perspective on that. And also, if you're on Reddit talking about like she did a deep clean and you need to qualify it with that you do everything else, I don't trust you.
00:58:09
Speaker
you're You're setting the stage to be the Christ figure in this mess. So he's like talking about how much he tries to do all the housework and blah, blah. blah And he's doesn't mind teamwork, but it feels like it's not that way.
00:58:25
Speaker
So then he says, she goes, well, if you would ever clean the fridge, you would know this. No. And this kind of sent me over the edge. And I made the comment that that was the only thing she's cleaned for a long time.
00:58:35
Speaker
Again, i don't care if she doesn't clean a lot or do the dishes. It would be nice. And some days, either because I loaded the dishes and it's still a sink full of others, she actually had done them when I got off work a couple of times. Oh, my God.
00:58:50
Speaker
Again, i don't mind. i wouldn't bring it up. But the fact that she set then says, if you ever cleaned the fridge, as if I'm not the one usually clean everything,
00:59:01
Speaker
She started throwing bowls, remotes, a candle, and my daughter's water bottle. So basically, he snapped back. she She made a comment about him not cleaning the fridge, which maybe that's a, you know, sounds like leftovers are a pain point, cleaning the fridge, blah, blah, blah. He made a comment that she never cleans anything else, and boom, now she starts throwing things, right?
00:59:27
Speaker
This alone made me loose. This alone made me loose it. I said to leave. He loosed his temper. This is where it gets interesting. So this alone made me loose it. I said to leave because I don't want that around our daughter. We agreed in the past. That's unacceptable. She kept yelling and saying she's not leaving.
00:59:48
Speaker
Now me, I started pulling in her legs for her to get off the couch. I wanted her out of the house. She never removes herself from a situation. She has too much pride.
01:00:00
Speaker
She finally storms off. She has too much pride. Okay. So she's throwing things, but then is on, but then is on the couch and he starts pulling on her legs to make her move. Yeah, like was she throwing things from the couch or was the throwing things over and she sat down on the couch, at which point he started trying to pull her off the couch and push her out of the house.
01:00:23
Speaker
That's lots of questions for the ah police to sort out. yeah i I wish we knew where this was because I would love to pull the police report.
01:00:34
Speaker
It would be great. She finally storms off upstairs. So it sounds to me like the situation is over at this point, right? Right.
01:00:45
Speaker
I call the cops. Oh, I'm over it. I regretted as soon as I started giving info, but ultimately I'm glad they came as embarrassing as it was. She's out there. regret it, but I'm glad it happened. Okay, bro.
01:00:59
Speaker
She's out there crying on the porch for two of the cops saying who knows what. The cop that talked to me actually couldn't have been cooler, more understanding, and really, really helped to talk to. You would almost wonder if that cop is used to, ah has personal experience with domestic violence. I was going to say the same thing. Oh, yeah. um Of course he was cool.
01:01:23
Speaker
He was so cool. He pointed out all the spots that don't bruise easily. yeah it a e He showed me how to know when too much, how much choking is too much choking, you know, all of that.
01:01:39
Speaker
ah So there's just so much wrong here already, but okay. So it continues. um Said if we wanted to separate for the night, he'd recommend, but if she seemed fine, it was up to me.
01:01:54
Speaker
He was really grounded overall. I was embarrassed to call, but I just couldn't believe how bad things got with, and with my daughter, it actually felt warranted. The thing is, from her perspective, it's all my fault. I pushed her. I should have just left her alone, which fine. That's probably true. It wouldn't have escalated. She has to walk on eggshells around me and I never have patience. I just feel so dead. I'm trying. Anytime I've lost patience has been after a long week full of overtime and on call, which I was picking up a lot to help us get out of some debt. I stopped picking it up as much because I was being selfish and always tired.
01:02:35
Speaker
I was being selfish for being... Okay. I... I think she likes it when it's not selfish to pick up work. It's not selfish.
01:02:46
Speaker
If she doesn't want you in the house, it's like, she needs me here. She can't do this on her. Like what I want to. Okay. I also want to know if she works um or if it's a stay at home mom situation, because if he's picking up overtime and being selfish by not being home.
01:03:04
Speaker
ah Okay. That's another fun thing. That's the only time he loses patience with her. two points. if he's not home, like, is he really coming home and doing all of the cleaning? Right. Like if she's a stay at home mom with a toddler, he's working, and he's working all the time and being a stay at home dad at the same time. Right. Is he really doing all the cleaning? Hard to know. Like I have personal experience with staying home with children during the day, ah with, you know, a varying degree of children plus a baby. Uh, and it is very hard to keep your shit in order. And I do my best and I do honestly a pretty good job of it. Um,
01:03:47
Speaker
in that but it's it's not easy um so the house isn't spotless when the working person comes home like so when i'm on paternity leave or when my wife was home while i was on uh working like you come home the place is never going to be spotless it's impossible it's a lot i mean if it's it's not impossible for some people uh who are probably better dealing with that shit but whatever varying degrees of ability we're talking about here like But when you're home dealing with that, you're actually cleaning up a lot consistently throughout the day, but it's hard to get ahead of it. And if this guy's working overtime, he's coming home, and he doesn't like some clutter, and he picks up some things, and he acts like that wasn't done all day, like you're insane. youre You just don't know. you haven't You probably haven't stayed home with your children. You probably have a stay-at-home situation.
01:04:40
Speaker
wife and you truly have never had the experience of staying home with a child all day. Um, yeah. And the other one is, ah being selfish is like, do you know many guys pick up work, extra work to help quote unquote pay the bills?
01:05:00
Speaker
Because it's actually a lot easier to do that than it is to be home with your family. Like that's, that's when your patience is really tested. That's when you have to like manage your emotions. Like that's it coming home from work and then doing family shit is not easy. Like sometimes I feel like work is the, is the break. It's more like it's streamlined. You have a, ah you know, a set of directives and,
01:05:28
Speaker
You have a routine and you go home and all that shit goes out the window. Like you can try your best, but it's not easy. And so like when guys act like virtue signal by acting like they work really hard to provide for their families, but they're never home. My first thought is you're, you're actually, ah you it's, there's a good percent chance that you're a little bitch boy that can't hack being a good dad.
01:05:51
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, maybe. i think given some of the other things he's said here, I would i would be more inclined to believe that. yeah mean, i I do think it's funny that, like, he's, one, he's, like, upset about, like, you know, some form of physical violence by her, but then also, like, you know, qualifies...
01:06:14
Speaker
and confesses to him doing something violent against her and trying to like pull her off the couch and push her out of the house. And two, like he's mad at her not being like, ah you know, not having patience and being happy and this and that and the other and being passive aggressive towards him. But then he also like with qualifications admits to being like passive aggressive and groovy, you know, grouchy and grumpy and whatnot to her.
01:06:43
Speaker
It's just like every little thing in here where he like makes a subtle confession, he has to qualify and like help you understand why in his case it's actually warranted or understandable. But for her, it doesn't make any sense. Like, what does she do all day? And it's like, regardless, I mean, with all of this, can you imagine calling the calling the cops on your pregnant wife just to make a point?
01:07:10
Speaker
I mean, it's just insane. Like, it it just reads as ridiculous. I... in In... Okay. In a perf... If the situation was late... Well, Midas the pull trying to pull her off the couch thing. And I also question the order operations.
01:07:25
Speaker
Did he try to pull her off the couch before she threw shit and he just wanted to look better on Reddit? We'll never know. I... i i Again, going back to my line of work, when a child reports that a parent is throwing things, that is a big deal.
01:07:42
Speaker
It impacts their psyche a lot. And so if that in a vacuum where we're just dealing with, you know, basic facts as we got in an argument and she started throwing things, arguments happen.
01:07:57
Speaker
Throwing things doesn't have to. And so. Right. But I'm just talking like straight, like that's it. ah We also like are instantly thinking of throwing things as like whipping them across the room. We don't know what he defines as throwing things. It's like she was slamming dishes into the sink, you know?
01:08:17
Speaker
I have even working in my school where kids do lose their shit and throw things in their classroom. We get calls that to support a classroom because a student is quote unquote throwing things. They're throwing chairs, whatever. And then you go in and you realize they didn't throw a chair. They tip the chair over huge difference. Right.
01:08:39
Speaker
And so, I hear this. like I don't trust anything this person is saying. And again, like you said, Casey, all the qualifiers, it makes it less let us able to be trusted because it feels like he's overcompensating. It's go it's Russell branding it with Christianity is what's happening right now. You're overdoing it.
01:09:00
Speaker
The thing is, I feel trapped. I feel like I can never have a bad day or feel tired from exhaustion. I don't feel like she's there for me in any of those ways. And if I treated her or talked to her how she talks to me in the slightest, she would blow up. Oh, it it wasn't a bad day when you pulled your wife off the couch by her legs. Oh, I can't have a bad day. Okay, bro.
01:09:22
Speaker
I wanted her out of the house. She was laying on the couch. Like, it's just, I don't know. I don't know how to handle things. I do feel like I'm trying to be there for her. trying to turn the chi Trying to turn the check when she's in a bad mood and angry.
01:09:39
Speaker
i personally don't feel like I deserve this and am treated like I'm some horrible husband and father and never there for her and never patient and on and on. I love her, but I am so tired of this.
01:09:53
Speaker
Okay. ah Dude, I it's they there's no way to really pass judgment on the whole thing without knowing any more actual like facts about it. But just no, I don't know. So much of my suspicion is like tipped by the thing that the guy says.
01:10:10
Speaker
were ah Were there any good comments trying to suss this out? And did OP reply to any of them? OP, p for those of you guys not informed, is the original poster on Reddit.
01:10:22
Speaker
Very good. Yeah, welcome. You're welcome. He commented on his own post saying, honestly, prayers would be appreciated. i just feel embarrassed by all of this.
01:10:34
Speaker
You're not a but dude. You're you're posting online. That's pageantry. That is just like I'm trying to solicit. I'm trying to you're you're trying to solicit comments that will tell you what you want to hear. So you don't feel bad about any of your responsibility. Like, because they dude I mean, they've been married for a while. Who knows where things really went off the rails? And I'm not making excuses for throwing things, but.
01:11:02
Speaker
We also don't know what this person's done. we It's Reddit. You can make your, it's so, it's it's hard to parse through. But I don't trust this man. nigollf replied And you should be no more embarrassed than a wife abused by her husband. It's not your fault. I would look for an in-person support group. Don't let fear stop you. Find some friends to walk with you.
01:11:25
Speaker
Overall, Lime also replied, you should you sound like a great husband overall. We all lose our... ah We all lose or patience. Maybe this is him actually commenting on his own post. This is his post account.
01:11:39
Speaker
We all lose or patience and say things we don't mean from time to time. You guys may need to consider speaking with your pastor because it's likely you both feel like you... Like your...
01:11:51
Speaker
wrong your right and some outside perspective might help she's your person don't give up oh my god neat golf response again also also like she's your person don't give up this is the problem with christian circle jerks too is like look if it is as he says even if it's not if you're not aware of your behavior, but your behavior is contributing to a situation where someone does lose their cool and throws things, and you have a kid, like, leave!
01:12:24
Speaker
Just, like, you can do that, but the only reason you can't entertain that idea is because of Christianity, right? Like, you can't entertain the idea of, like... moving on and figuring out, and it's, I'm not saying that's easy, right? If he is the only one working, now you're looking at child support. If if you're in an alimony state, now you only have 50% of your income. Like divorce a nightmare financially. And that's sometimes the financial nightmare of divorce is the biggest deterrent to divorce. That's what Scott Peterson thought. Yeah. Hmm.
01:13:00
Speaker
yeah who Never mind. Remind me? Okay. he made it he He took an alternate route to ending his marriage. He murdered his wife? Yes, he did.
01:13:10
Speaker
with
01:13:16
Speaker
Okay. That was his whole defense argument was like, come on, alimony, dude. That is an incredible defense, actually. I don't know if that was defense. When deranged sociopaths, actually, like, if that's what they go, like, well, see, when you look at my options on the table, there's alimony and child support or getting away with murder.
01:13:38
Speaker
I hedged my bets. I hedged wrong. Dude, knee golf sounds like ah quite a guy. He responded again to the same Sounds like he might his wife occasionally.
01:13:48
Speaker
He says, praying for you. My wife was raised by a mother that taught women's hormones were an excuse for mean and abusive behavior. My mother typically taught my sister the opposite. I thought all men were all women were generally nice and only men were this way. Even emotional abuse isn't okay. I had to stop being gaslighted.
01:14:09
Speaker
This guy is on a watch list somewhere. Carefully. this so the guy responds. Thank you so much. Sad face. This guy's missed the last 13 child support payments.
01:14:21
Speaker
I'm honestly not trying to bad mouth my wife, but I feel like I have no ah no one to really go to. I'm not trying to turn people against my wife, which I feel like is what would happen to anyone. i'm yeah What would you expect with this? I'm not. I'm just looking for someone to go to. And you've been that person for me, knee golf. Can we meet up? I'd like to see you in person.
01:14:46
Speaker
How many inches is it, Nigo? That's really amazing. I've got that cool biological genetic trait where ah I got the boa constrictor jaw.
01:14:59
Speaker
It's got a double-jointed sphincter. yeah It's actually like, ah have you ever seen like a... What's the jaw that releases where you like the jaw actually disconnects? That's what that's what constrictors have, right?
01:15:13
Speaker
yeah Like an egg eating snake. Yeah. ah That's really amazing. Isn't a problem for me.
01:15:25
Speaker
That's really amazing. She made a point to teach your sister that because me as a man, I really can never say anything about it because I'll never know. I know it's far beyond what I could imagine. Yeah. But that's really cool. I love that mom was sexist trash that raised your daughter to be abused by men.
01:15:44
Speaker
But that's really cool. Despite that, she all the hormone slash body slash emotional pain she had to go through. She still fought for kindness. Thank you for the prayers. Honestly, it really means a lot to me. That's enough. That's enough of him. Wow.
01:15:59
Speaker
Can't read any more him. sucks. With your mom's tutelage, I can't imagine how hard your sister's first period was for her. All those hormones. It must have been a nightmare. She powered through it. What a strong woman.
01:16:14
Speaker
Maybe you can get me in touch with her for advice. Tell me more about your sister, Negall. Do you want to hear one going the opposite direction? I sure do. I think you need some people not blowing smoke up his ass.
01:16:29
Speaker
This is a... Okay, I'm going to try not to give away the game here, but this is a bit of a victory lap. This is the guy who did it the right way. Okay? All right. And after I read this, I'm try not to give it away.
Social Media Habits and Relationship Differences
01:16:44
Speaker
I want you to guess how long they've been together. Oh, I mean... Okay. Humble me if you need to. um I feel like in our guessing games where you have me guess things, I'm usually really good at them.
01:17:00
Speaker
I'd say so. it like i I feel like I surprise you with my guesses and how accurate they are frequently. I feel like this is on par in the Christian world, but like it's it's funny now that we're out of it. like It's funny. well I thought about calling that out afterwards, but I wanted to do it ahead of time so if I'm wrong, I can you know eat my humble pie.
01:17:21
Speaker
you just have to You just have to post the truth social claiming that you were right anyways. Yeah, but no, because I'm a humble man who doesn't grab my wife by the legs and yank her off the couch, and I want people to know that. Even when she's moody and deserves it.
01:17:35
Speaker
I don't even do it when she's not pregnant, bro.
01:17:40
Speaker
You sound like a pregnant. Honestly, you sound like a really good husband and father. Yeah. i mean, the bar is not yanking your wife by the legs while she's pregnant. And I am soaring.
01:17:53
Speaker
You're batting a thousand, dude.
01:17:58
Speaker
So the title of the post is Forgave My Ex, Now Look. I see so many people posting talking about how miserable they are being single and how they haven't found love. The truth is, a lot of you have found love. You just ran it off because it got uncomfortable or you felt you could do better or your friends or family convinced you they weren't the one. You left because it wasn't perfect.
01:18:23
Speaker
I'm 30 male. My now fiance is 31. I was a nondenominal non-denominational Christian when we met. White. She was Southern Baptist. Black. We had differences.
01:18:36
Speaker
Real ones. We both had been on our own since college. We argued over small things. I had a female best friend who made her feel insecure. Also, she always she would always leave stuff in my new... actually gay she would always leave stuff in my new car that caused ants yeah i like that he believes that i like that he believes that crumbs cause ants that's some real like 1800s maggot theory yeah like they just spawn out of the ether when there's crumbs
01:19:12
Speaker
Until that one dude put it under a glass case and was like, hey, there's no maggots. Dude, imagine the screaming matches, you know?
01:19:23
Speaker
I told you Subway is not car friendly food. No, Subway, dude. Subway doesn't cause ants. It's genetically modified to stay fresh forever. Dude, ants can't ants can't feed the Subway bread to their fungal garden for the queen, so you're safe out there.
01:19:41
Speaker
It ties up their intestines and makes them shit bricks until they blow out their assholes and die. Actually, Subway bread, if you feed it to seagulls, they'll explode. It's like Alka-Seltzer.
01:19:59
Speaker
It's like giving your dog. um Oh, man. Hydrogen peroxide. that What does that do? You don't know, dude. If your dog eats chocolate or some shit, you pour some hydrogen peroxide down their throat. Oh, automatically makes them barf.
01:20:15
Speaker
Oh, that's right. I guess I did read that at one point. Yeah. Well, had to do it once. It works very fast. and of a get out of the way sort of thing yeah it doesn't take much because i'm like i don't think any of it's getting down there i'm fucking waterboarding my dog with hydrogen peroxide i don't think it's getting in there then it's like all it took was a few drops and she hacked up everything dude i don't i don't buy the the uh the like instant dog death food items things
01:20:51
Speaker
I feel like dude my dog is eating so many turds. Like what could possibly, what could chocolate possibly do? Saying that dogs die from chocolate is like telling you to only take two Tylenol.
01:21:04
Speaker
It's just like, like, dude, the, I mean, the general rule for me, like I go, if whatever is on the bottle that says the safe amount, they know people are going to do more than what they say.
01:21:16
Speaker
oh yeah. So NyQuil, right. Oh, NyQuil, that drowsy shit, right. You go take 30 milliliters and they're like, yeah, because some asshole is going to be really sick and have a hard time sleeping and they're going to take 45. Yeah.
01:21:31
Speaker
Generally, I go, whatever they tell you the doses, you do double. Some alcoholic has told themselves that this isn't off the wagon because it's just NyQuil. you can do You can probably do whatever ah you could probably double whatever they say is safe and still not have to contact poison control.
01:21:47
Speaker
okay ah I'm third. Well, wait, no. Our friends didn't always mix.
Relationship Breakthroughs and Counseling
01:21:53
Speaker
Her friends were always quick to use the term toxic or calling me immature because they thought we should have been engaged sooner because that's what real men would do. It got bad enough that we broke up for about three months, our first year together, after a heated argument where she even pushed me.
01:22:10
Speaker
Some of my family felt she had maturing to do and thought she was very emotional. During our relationship, she always had a fear of leaving home. She wanted us to live near her family after marriage. played the I love that you just played the emotional black woman trope.
01:22:25
Speaker
yeah I wanted to be close to my hometown. There was real tension. But here's the difference. We didn't quit. During the three months broken up, we used it as a time to pray and fast, vowing not to go on dates with new people or gossip about one another to anyone. We later started dating again. Other than Reddit. you' right Yeah.
01:22:49
Speaker
we label redit don't count We later started dating again and ah we found a young adult counselor at church who we sat down with together, not alone, and worked through our issues.
01:23:02
Speaker
We already had love. We deeply loved each other. We had friendship. What we didn't have yet was the ability to coexist. Counseling helped us understand that what that differences don't always mean incompatibility. The things I got mad about were valid. The things she got mad about were valid. But we stopped going tit for tat.
01:23:22
Speaker
We stopped trying to win. Instead, we learned to bring our concerns to each other on separate days. We stopped running to friends and family with our problems, and we started protecting our relationship.
01:23:34
Speaker
We shared wins with our friends family and friends rather than wounds. The wounds went to counseling where they were could actually be healed. Over time, things changed. Out of respect for her I distanced myself from the girl best friend, and my girl best my girlbest friend mutually accepted my choice because she wants me to be happy.
01:23:52
Speaker
Me and my now future wife went to church and repented for our fights, and she apologized for pushing me. We got baptized together. She realized venting to her friends about my political views was not wisdom. boy. Oh, boy. Dude, I knew there were racist undertones here, and he is a conservative for sure.
01:24:15
Speaker
Oh, man, I can't. I would love to know what his ah political takes are. But I mean, I guess I can guess. I can guess. You can guess. You sure can. It was emotional release that created division. His most sellier political view is um the Civil War wasn't about slavery. It was about states' rights. He must not be a white genocide guy. Yeah.
01:24:41
Speaker
ah Venting to her friends about my political views was not wisdom. It was emotional release that created division. Now we both take those things to counseling and come back with solutions. It's been exactly two years and April.
01:24:55
Speaker
You notice that's the only thing he mentioned was his political views. Yeah. That's what caused all the problems was she, shi her venting about like, ah you know, his, ah his strong views on stem cell research or whatever.
01:25:10
Speaker
The political views thing is, yeah, that because everyone because everyone staunchly, but like it wasn't, there's no admission of guilt or wrongdoing. It's because everyone believes that their political views are emphatically correct. Me, you, our listeners, everybody.
01:25:26
Speaker
So you're not even admitting it. You're just admitting that she disagreed with how right you were about it, but you were such a big man that you're willing to put that by the wayside in order to cultivate a stronger relationship. Yeah. Yeah. Like what exactly? where Where did you give ground other than ants?
01:25:44
Speaker
I guess other than anger over ants. Like, did you change any? Did you take in her perspective on your political views at all? Like, did that affect how you think about the world? Because she has a different perspective. Or was it all just her learning not to talk to people who wouldn't like them?
01:26:01
Speaker
Right. Mighty, mighty big of him. ah It's been OK. Well, almost gave away the game. He's like, I got my ah i got my political views.
01:26:12
Speaker
ah She doesn't love how I feel about Sally Hemings.
01:26:19
Speaker
I proposed and we are getting married in June. Looking back, the truth is simple. We did not give up. We set boundaries to build, not just to feel. A lot of Christians talk about love, but quit the moment it gets uncomfortable. You idolize Ruth and Boaz and talk about being a Proverbs 31 woman, but you won't endure anything real. Men do the same thing.
Breaking Up and Enduring Love
01:26:42
Speaker
Your friends tell you that you can do better, so you drop someone who is actually willing to grow with you.
01:26:48
Speaker
Y'all let each other, y'all let other people gas you up and convince you to walk away. If your partner isn't a real abuser, I'm talking about standing over you, punching you. If your spouse hasn't cheated physically with someone or stolen money from you or revealed that they are an atheist.
01:27:04
Speaker
stop your say He has to say cheated. Well, the atheist thing is nuts, but he has to say cheated physically because he obviously had an emotional affair with his female best friend. Yeah.
01:27:15
Speaker
ah Oh, that's so true. That's exactly what it was. Yeah. So those are the three contexts in which you can rightfully break up with someone. If they punch you in the face, ah if they cheat on you physically, right? Not not emotionally. i'm I'm sure he'd get really shifty if he talked about like whether or not porn was cheating.
01:27:43
Speaker
Oh, he would. That sounds like something he would lie about. Well, he he doesn't bring it up here, so he's big into it. Or if you're an atheist. Those are the three reasons. Punching, cheating, atheism.
01:27:56
Speaker
Valid reasons for breaking up with someone. Perfect. ah he he Stealing money is bad too. If they stole money from you, then it's over.
01:28:08
Speaker
That's not someone you can grow with. There's always a way to work through it. Y'all idolize this idea that it's if it's sent from God, it's supposed to be easy, but that's a lie. A lot of great stories in the Bible came with struggle or endurance.
01:28:23
Speaker
The problem is so many of y'all will never experience love because you don't have the ability to endure. You have the ability to accept when things are easy and great, but real love is knowing you're standing next to someone who can weather the storm with you, not jump aboard in it or not jump overboard in it.
01:28:40
Speaker
If you want, stay single and read all the scriptures and apply them to your single season, quote unquote. Just remember the Lord also has a working season that he wants you to go through as well before you quit.
01:28:52
Speaker
What if God wanted you to endure together? What if the struggle was part of the testimony? What if growth required discomfort, patience, and forgiveness? Some of you would never give your ex a second chance. Some of you refuse to forgive at all, but still call yourselves Christians.
01:29:09
Speaker
My now future wife and I broke up. We came back together through forgiveness. We are engaged and I'm proud of us. We don't want to just want love. We showed we could sustain it. And now we've become better better together and we have a testimony we can share with our kids. Whoa.
01:29:26
Speaker
They're not even married. Not yet. Right. I'd rather share a real testimony than hope for a Disney fairy tale. ah Blank blank was not easy, but we endured. We gave each other grace.
01:29:40
Speaker
Love isn't easy, y'all. Sometimes it requires you to feel uncomfortable. But if you have the heart to forgive, you'll find something that not many people understand. A partner for life, not just a season. How long, Mr. Sam, have they been together?
01:29:56
Speaker
uh under three years yep okay um you want me to give an exact time um let's go with let's go with two and a half years two two years they've been together two years and he's taking a victory lap and chastising people on it Oh my god. Oh man.
01:30:22
Speaker
it's It's just so funny. eight
01:30:28
Speaker
Dude, I remember i do remember like before getting okay, i no, I remember like Before getting married, you know, we too we got married so young. of the Of course you have those thoughts of like, whoa, whoa, whoa, what am I doing?
01:30:46
Speaker
Like, I got married three days before I turned 21. That's nuts. Man. And so like, you i go to You go to college and you're like, oh, man. like and dude I was just talking about a colleague with a colleague about this today. One of the women I work with, that I share an office with, is she's a couple years younger than me. She's been in the same relationship for over a decade. like And we have a lot of... like yeah we understand what that means. um
01:31:20
Speaker
And so like we, I was just saying today, like, you know, you look at people who stay married versus get divorced and it's like, I've been married for quite a while.
01:31:32
Speaker
And so occasionally people say things to you like, Oh wow, that was really young. Like, Oh, like, they're They're interested. People are interested in how things like worked out. how whatever cause That's such a young age. People change a lot. like and I've said this before in the the podcast for sure, but it's like to me, it's a combination of things for sure. and One of those things is luck.
01:31:55
Speaker
At that age, you don't know yourself. like We know where I ended up belief-wise, which is... you know not super well established, but hyper criticism of evangelical Christianity and in dogmatism.
Communication and Compatibility in Marriage
01:32:11
Speaker
And it's like I'm in a relationship with a married to a woman who has some different beliefs, but is totally cool with where I'm at. And we've we're unified on how we want to raise our children. And that makes it that works like.
01:32:27
Speaker
But there are plenty of people who one person went my direction or farther. And one person stayed in the evangelical Christian lane. And that creates an insanely difficult dynamic that is so all oftentimes unsustainable. Like, and that's, that's partly luck, right?
01:32:47
Speaker
ah You never know where people end up. It's partly us having open communication about where we're at and what we think, but like, it's, part It's also partly disposition where we're similar levels of laid back, um not hyper focused on ah certain achievements that don't align with aspects of having a family and working together as a team. Like there's a lot of things that come into it. But But at the end of the day, I often just feel lucky because it it it it went the other direction for so many people.
01:33:21
Speaker
And I'm not arrogant enough to believe that it's because like I was so stand up that I was able to make it work like it was able to work despite a lot of my own shortcomings in my ability to appropriately communicate with who why who where i'm at how i feel like there's a lot going on there but like i what what's crazy about this is like you hear the the op go like share all this shit it's like look maybe you're right or maybe in your own mind you're right but at the end of the day your lived experience is yours it could make you a really shitty person or it could make you a good person
01:34:03
Speaker
But either way, both good and shitty people get divorced because they're in relationships with people they're not compatible with. I know shitty people who have been married for 45 years because that relationship managed to be compatible because that the other partner was able to put up with that person's version of shitty.
01:34:23
Speaker
Right. Yeah. I mean, there's there's so much that. goes into it. It's it's funny because in these in this world, it's like if it works, it's it's you know God's hand, his plan yeah for you and your spouse and that and this
Evangelical Pressures and Early Marriage
01:34:41
Speaker
and that. If it doesn't work, then it's you know it's either one person like abandoning God's plan or it was God's plan for you to leave or whatever. you know and I mean, i think one of the things that really just sucks about like the whole culture around dating impurity and all that stuff. I mean, one of the things that I just hate the most about it, like is the fact that there's so much pressure to get married so soon.
01:35:09
Speaker
And it's already like it's it's enough as it is, but then there's also like that almost like teenage euphoria feeling that you have when you like fall in love for the first time and you, you know, you're you're ready to like make long-term commitments right away just because you have like this feeling that you don't, you know, you've never experienced and you don't know what to do with and stuff like that. And like, yeah it takes it takes almost more discipline, I think, just to...
01:35:38
Speaker
just to set that aside and like, you know, be together, you know, yeah and we're, well, while both people have an out clause, you know, for a long but period of time.
01:35:51
Speaker
Because we're sexual beings, evangelicalism takes a lot of that off the table, right? Yeah. It's like, it it makes it complicated to be in a relationship that's not sexual. That was sexually intimate.
01:36:03
Speaker
And I don't, we didn't take like, I don't know, you know, we, we like, whined a lot and stuff about purity and things and like, you know, keeping control of our faculties and all this stuff, you know, and we were dating and everything. But like, ultimately, like we weren't as crazy about it as some people were. And yet there's still like there's this thing in the back of your mind of like, well, I need to get we need to get married before we like slip up and yeah ruin our life. you know, and just the notion that like, well, if you, if you do like lose your purity before marriage, like there's no way part of what weighs on you. Cause was fully committed to, to April and she was to me, you know, early on.
01:36:47
Speaker
So like, it wasn't like it was just like casual relationship or anything like that. But even still, there's this idea that like, it's some like divine punishment mechanism of like, well, if you do slip up, like God can't bless your marriage.
01:37:02
Speaker
Like, which is so ridiculous. It's so ridiculous yeah that I don't know. It just takes the fun out of dating. I think in a lot of ways, like we shouldn't have been thinking so much about that at the time. We should have just been enjoying each other and getting to know each other. And that's the thing here is like, dude, two years in you barely know each other.
01:37:21
Speaker
Like, right. There's so much pressure when you're when you're solely focused on, like, making it work and getting married and this and that. And the other like, it takes time for people to really let down their guard and really like let you into who they actually are. And i mean, these two, they clearly have some differences. Maybe it'll be fine. you know Maybe it'll all work out. But like.
01:37:43
Speaker
they've been angling towards making this work at all costs for a long time. And just doing a victory lap two years in is so ridiculous that i don't know.
01:37:54
Speaker
This is funny. I think another, i think another component to it is also because of the hyper fixation on marriage being forever and everybody in evangelicalism, believing that they're not going to be a casualty of divorce.
01:38:09
Speaker
I think the I think that when things are really good, i think the desire to lock it in as marriage but makes you believe it's kind of a fear based reaction.
01:38:22
Speaker
It's like, I'm afraid if we don't do this now, we won't. But if we do it now, we have we have to. Now we're committed. Now we can't exit. We have to do the work. like So as opposed to deciding to get married because you did the work and you realize that this is the right choice for you, you preemptively strike that and you get married because you hope it'll force you to do the work.
01:38:47
Speaker
when things get hard instead of just riding it out and seeing if you guys like long-term are compatible. Cause like you said, that shit does take time. And so I think it's ultimately often a fear-based react. I think marriage is often a fear-based reaction in evangelical circles.
01:39:03
Speaker
What do you think about the notion of like, they, they, they tuned their friends and family out and stopped telling them about what was going on between them?
External Influences on Relationships
01:39:14
Speaker
Uh, I, I,
01:39:16
Speaker
That largely depends on the friends and family. Like... Yeah. I have no interest in... that there's There's plenty of people that I have friends or family alike, depending on who they are, have no interest in talking to you about my my personal life like that. So, like...
01:39:31
Speaker
that that's largely dependent on their circles. Now, I mean, this guy hearing about this guy and his proliferation for particular types of politics, I can imagine it's statistically likely he comes from a family that has those same types of politics, uh, might not be the best people to get advice from who thought his wife was like very emotional.
01:39:55
Speaker
Yeah. and She had a lot of growing up to do. They're like, have you watched the movie diary of a mad black woman?
01:40:04
Speaker
um So somebody in the comments, we kind of close on this, but somebody asks a genuine question. How did you guys get back together? Did you reach out to her? He responds another long winded thing. He says, when we first broke up, we were about nine months into our relationship slash courtship.
01:40:20
Speaker
We got into a huge fight and she pushed me into the counter. I left. We hadn't spoke about it. We hadn't spoke for about two weeks until she wrote me apologizing and let me know she would reflect on what she did.
01:40:33
Speaker
i Oh my God. Okay. Stop. Stop. Like no again, this dude's a fucking loser. No, no admission of what led up to the pushing. Like did, he did he walk up to her? Did he get six inches from her? Was he yelling?
01:40:50
Speaker
Like in a lot of situations, it would be super reasonable for someone to push you away based on how you were acting and how scared they were of your reactions. Yeah.
01:41:00
Speaker
Yeah. And like, where did this disagreement stem from? Right. I need way more context before I believe like that. That could have been her trying to salvage it. Again, the fear based bullshit in evangelical Christianity. Oh, I pushed him. Now I'm afraid I torched this. So I'm going to accept culpability for something that I had a reasonable reaction to is incredibly common in evangelical spaces because gaslighting is incredibly common in evangelical spaces.
01:41:29
Speaker
I told her I'd reflect on the grievances she had, and we both agreed to be cordial, no bashing each other. She responded saying she didn't want anyone else, so she reassured me she wasn't going to go out outside go out despite her friend's encouragement to walk away. My mom and her friends were our big biggest obstacle, by the way.
01:41:50
Speaker
For about a month, I fasted and would write her. kind of like His mom? his His mom and my her friends. Why why your mom? Why your mom? Because she's not good enough for her baby boy.
01:42:02
Speaker
That could be it. I'm still highly skeptical of the racial component. Porcelain white baby boy. Yeah, yeah. Oh, they're too culturally different. It's not going to work out.
01:42:15
Speaker
there's The a and B exists for a reason. i'm I'm not prejudiced, but they push people. Yeah. You could just hear like the conversation for about a month. I fasted and would write her kind of like journal entries in via iPhone notes. And she would respond right by month two. She had sent me some links to her to counseling through a church and I showed interest but still needed time.
01:42:44
Speaker
One day i woke up and felt scared, like she wasn't safe. And and I began praying to God. I said, can allow my ego to keep me distant or I could be the one next to her, keeping her safe.
01:42:56
Speaker
I read scriptures on forgiveness. I ended up writing Lauren a long text asking her if we could forgive each other. She responded, I forgive you. I responded, i forgive you.
01:43:08
Speaker
Oh my God. You notice he reached out asking for if they could, if they could forgive each other, but she still had to be the first one to forgive. And also forgive each other for what? Like he's, we know there's something here, dude. You're not saying it
01:43:25
Speaker
uh we met at the park and we sat together and talked about why we loved one another i was proactive i said let's do counseling we submitted she already said him counselors this is a bitch he's the problem after she she suggested it and i said no I was proactive. She suggested it and sent me 13 different places we could go. I was proactive by choosing one.
01:43:52
Speaker
We submitted interest. The church reached out to us so to set an appointment, and we agreed to only go together so there's no confusion. I put my mom I'm not sure we picked the white male counselor.
01:44:05
Speaker
I put my mom on D&D. She puts her friends on D&D. Dungeons and d and we Dragons? We can only assume. Yeah. Three months passed, and we had to relearn one another like we were new people, but we enjoyed the process. She wrote a letter to her friends asking them to respect her decision.
01:44:23
Speaker
I talked to my mom. Dude, I hate this letter bullshit. I do, too. it sucked. I have... I have personal experience with someone in my life writing a letter to somebody in my life about how they feel about them and then cutting off communication. And I really, really hate it.
01:44:43
Speaker
it's It's just kind of like you're you're taking... in I'm trying to think of how to say this in the very, very, very, very off chance they listen um because I had a conversation with them directly about it and it's like it feels like
01:45:03
Speaker
i It feels like a coward's way out. I might have sugarcoated a little bit more, but it feels like an easy way out. I'm going to say my thing and not give you an opportunity to respond and have a conversation about this and hold my ground and, and, and stand up for what I believe. It feels like I'm going to send it to you. And then now you have to deal with it. And I don't have to deal with any of the uncomfortable repercussions that of those actions. I hate that shit. Right.
01:45:30
Speaker
I'm just going to go ahead and put a big wedge between myself and everyone besides this one person who I have like a close communication with, you know,
01:45:40
Speaker
And i believe in I believe in the concept of writing
Friendship Dynamics and Public Sharing
01:45:43
Speaker
letters. I believe through like in counseling. It's like write a letter saying the things you want. I believe that those can be cathartic. I also believe in writing out what you want to say to somebody and asking them for you to be able to read it to them fully.
01:45:57
Speaker
But you also need to be able to be ready to respond to certain things. You notice you can also have reasonable answers. You could also be like, i don't i don't have an answer for that. you could There's things you can say. You don't have to actually have a thoughtful response to all of their concerns. And some of their concerns might be bullshit.
01:46:18
Speaker
And you could not entertain that. And that's fine. But I don't like i i believe in a more um and more of an engagement process, I guess. Yeah, like friends can be bad influences. They can be wrong about people and they can like not give your significant other the the benefit of the doubt, you know, and stuff like And they can be right and you can be wrong. And it's helpful to have people tell you that. Right.
01:46:43
Speaker
Like shutting everyone else out is not a good. It's not a good practice. um youll You'll notice that he has not once mentioned him his friends.
01:46:54
Speaker
No, his friends are perfect, especially his girl best friend that he probably still Snapchats with. That's the only one. That's the only friend he's mentioned. He's mentioned that girl and his mom. Nobody. Because. So does he have friends? Does he have anybody else that he's close to? Or was it just those two?
01:47:14
Speaker
I don't know, but it's irrelevant because his girl best friend is the only one who truly got him. And he was willing to make that sacrifice because he got friend zoned by her. She respected his request because she wants him to be happy. Yeah. ah We were officially back together. Almost a year passed. No more fights. We ended up getting baptized together. And for April Fool's, I played a prank on her. She chased me around the apartment and we ended up wrestling on the floor. I got up and proposed. April 3rd, 2026. Ring emoji.
01:47:48
Speaker
Oh my God. I hate this guy. He does suck. I want to meet him. I want to have him on the podcast. I don't know. he would probably he probably wouldn't want to talk to us for fear that we would, you know, cast doubt on his ah his commitment or something. I want to message him. Send me the send me the ah dude. Send me the Reddit post.
01:48:12
Speaker
I'm going to I'm going to message him directly. Say that we're interested in his story and that we'd love to have him on the podcast. Okay. I'm sending it to you. And please don't listen to any of our previous episodes. You don't need to do any show research before this. In fact, it's encouraged that you don't.
01:48:30
Speaker
or Or do. Or listen to it Nobody does anyways. Come on here and defend yourself. Please defend yourself. Oh my god, I hate this guy. Yeah, it's a... Oh man.
01:48:43
Speaker
The arrogance. Like, just the the fact that he's... What is this post for? This is for everyone else's benefit. Like, even the fact that he wrote this post is so insane. This is the epitome of public masturbation.
01:48:55
Speaker
He Louis CK'd the shit out of everybody on this Reddit brand.
01:49:02
Speaker
No one asked for he didn't even ask if they would watch first. He just You're right. He whipped it out. He didn't Louis C.K. it. he Who's the guy who they made an ogre look like him in Lord the Rings?
01:49:17
Speaker
Alan Dershowitz? No, the pockmarked, disgusting freak who was a director. Oh, Harvey Weinstein? Yeah, he's more of a Harvey Weinstein.
01:49:28
Speaker
i don't know, dude. Candace Owens says he's innocent. Oh, really? She's a big wine stand. She's right about a lot of things these days, so I guess I'll... i guess i'll ah She's a wine stand, and there's not many of those.
01:49:43
Speaker
yeah yeah She also says that Andrew Tate is completely innocent. Didn't she also just have Russell Brand on her podcast? I'm sure.
01:49:54
Speaker
yeah probably. What a weird lane. Just defend white pervs.
Media Commentary and Concluding Advice
01:50:00
Speaker
Yeah, well, I don't know. She's another one. Maybe the most extreme example of like, hey, if she's saying the right thing, great. um Yeah. That doesn't make her sane.
01:50:12
Speaker
No, no, she is. ah She's one of the most egregious people in public media. Oh, boy.
01:50:22
Speaker
Well, um I hope you've all learned a lot and I hope you took took some relationship notes. ah if you're If you're a lady and you're listening to this, would don't throw things.
01:50:35
Speaker
Don't push people. If you're a man and you're listening to this, you know be willing to forgive the women in your life for not recognizing your greatness, you know your compassion, how much you clean. Yeah.
01:50:53
Speaker
You know, all of that. and if you are a woman who does throw things and push people, just understand it might not end your relationship, but there will be a Reddit thread about you.
01:51:03
Speaker
Yeah. So it may be best to take the Scott Peterson approach with your husband before the Reddit thread, because that's admissible in court. All right, everybody. Thanks for listening. And we will see you next time.