Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Episode 11: How do you want to feel?
40 Plays2 years ago
How do you want to feel? And you waiting to reach that goal, or have that thing feel that way? How can we start to be more intentional about experiencing those feelings a little bit each day?
I came across Danielle Laport this weekend and her work around feeling love and how to be more loving, and then got her book about desire mapping. She asks the question how do you want to feel? And she talks about identifying core desire feelings and using that as a guide to set goals and make decisions. This reminds me of the practice of identifying core values and using that as a guide to your life.
https://daniellelaporte.com/
Learn more/ Reach out and say hi! https://linktr.ee/lisette.ostrander
Photo Credit: Audra Miller https://millerstudios.net/
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to the Podcast
00:00:01
Speaker
Hi friends, this is Lisette Ostrander and this is my kind of pleasure podcast where we will explore topics of sex, pleasure, desire, mindset, and emotions and use the information learned to live the life we want and have the sex we want. Happy Sunday. It is April 23rd, 2023.
Episode Check-In and Reflection
00:00:19
Speaker
This is episode 11. I am checking in quickly to give you an update to say hi and to see how all of you are doing. How are you doing?
00:00:30
Speaker
and aligning with the title of this episode. How are you feeling and how do you want to feel? Everything we do or don't do is to feel a certain way or not feel a certain way. We set goals and we go after things and we avoid things.
00:00:47
Speaker
to ultimately feel or not feel a certain way.
Intention and Decision-Making Based on Feelings
00:00:51
Speaker
However, how intentional are you with what you want to feel? And do you take the time to think about what you want to feel? And then from there, make decisions and set goals and decide what you're going to do on a daily basis.
00:01:05
Speaker
I certainly do not do that at the moment, but I am looking to find a new way to approach my year long goal of pursuing aliveness and pleasure while also reaching some ambitious professional goals and some fun personal and relationship goals along the way. So this episode was inspired because I was feeling a bit restless. And a great thing about this podcast is it allows me to check in weekly
00:01:34
Speaker
I created this podcast for many reasons, but one of the number one reasons was to be more accountable with bringing more pleasure and aliveness into my life. So I check in to see if that is what I am experiencing.
00:01:49
Speaker
On my way to pursuing my goals and dreams this year, am I bringing more pleasure and aliveness into my life on this journey? And this week, as I checked in, I realized I keep getting caught in this old way of thinking, which is when I accomplish X or when I have Y, then I will feel a certain way.
Shifting the Mindset on Goals and Emotions
00:02:10
Speaker
And I know better than this, but I think it's something that's so ingrained in all of us that we set goals and we work hard and then we quote unquote feel good when we accomplish it. And you know, I talk about this in my introduction episode about being intentional about feeling the feelings we want to feel even before we achieve the goals. I also talk about this in episode five when I say it's important that we don't
00:02:36
Speaker
use our goals against ourselves and how it's about the journey and the process and not necessarily about achieving the goals. I also share a practice that I have of when I meditate, I, at the end of my meditation, I visualize the feelings that I want to feel when I achieve what I set out to achieve. And I take time to really feel it and embody it. And it's an amazing practice. I highly recommend it. It's definitely changed.
00:03:05
Speaker
I think my baseline feelings and my mindset, but I realized that once I hop out of the meditations, I go quickly straight into my to-do list and I just go.
00:03:18
Speaker
I think I sacrifice connection a lot. I sacrifice being in relationships in order to get certain things done and to reach this goal, especially because I've said it like I need to reach these goals this year and bring more aliveness and pleasure into my life.
Influence of Danielle LaPorte and Core Desire Feelings
00:03:36
Speaker
So I came across the work of Danielle LaPorte this past weekend and she talks about feeling love and how to be more loving. And she also has a book about desire mapping.
00:03:48
Speaker
And in the book Desire Mapping, which I got, she asked the question, how do you want to feel? And she talks about identifying core desire feelings and using that as a guide to set goals and make decisions.
00:04:03
Speaker
And this reminds me a lot about the practice of identifying core values and using that to guide your life. So I love this concept of identifying core desire feelings. And I'm going to dive into the book and share what I learned with all of you over the next couple weeks.
00:04:22
Speaker
the first assignment i'm giving my myself and i welcome you to join me even before i finish the book is to think about aliveness and pleasure and more specifically what is it that i want to feel i think by identifying that and really understanding what
00:04:45
Speaker
pleasure and aliveness mean to me and how they feel for me that it will help me on this journey. I think I've been doing it a bit in reverse. I thought I was thinking about the goals that I wanted to achieve and then I would think about how that would make me feel and then I meditated on that and then would really, you know,
00:05:06
Speaker
be intentional about embodying those feelings during meditations.
Personal Definitions of Pleasure and Community Identity
00:05:10
Speaker
However, I didn't take the time to think ahead of time, what does aliveness and pleasure look like for me outside of these goals?
00:05:21
Speaker
And I think part of my journey this year was I'm going to take this year to figure out what aliveness and pleasure means to me. And perhaps this is why this is coming at the perfect time. I'm a couple months into this journey. And I think it's time that I am intentional with what that feels like for me.
00:05:42
Speaker
I love that I've named this community and my podcast, my kind of pleasure podcast, because I know that it looks and feels different for all of us. So I will continue to share what I am learning, uh, through the work that I'm doing through Danielle Laporte's book. And again, I leave you with a question. How do you want to feel?
00:06:09
Speaker
And are you waiting to reach that goal or that outcome to, or to have that thing to feel that way?
Community Launch and Building Experience
00:06:19
Speaker
And how can you start being more intentional about experiencing those feelings a little bit each day, even before that goal is accomplished or you have that thing?
00:06:36
Speaker
I also want to leave you with a quick update. I have not yet officially opened the doors to my kind of pleasure community and that is coming soon. I do really appreciate this journey I'm on even though I'm feeling a bit restless at the moment.
00:06:51
Speaker
I was getting ready to open the doors and as I was about to do that, I came across this community that's all about building community and memberships. I'm just going to take a few moment to be in the community a couple of weeks, learn some stuff and then officially launch.
Future Coaching Content and Certification Plans
00:07:12
Speaker
I also really want to focus more on connection and being in relationships, as I mentioned.
00:07:19
Speaker
And I am pursuing a coaching certification and have set my goal to complete that by the end of June. So for the next month or two, the content that I'm going to be sharing on the podcast will be related to the content that I'm learning in my coaching certification. And although it might not be always
00:07:43
Speaker
about sex and pleasure. I think it's so connected to it. We'll be talking about mindset and emotions and unconditional love and boundaries and all that good stuff and the desire mapping that I'm learning from Danielle Laporte totally connects.
Listener Appreciation and Future Content Plans
00:08:01
Speaker
So I will bring that all in. I want to thank you all for listening. I really appreciate you and I will be back in a week. Bye.