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Ep 131: Can't Buy Me Love
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Made in Arizona month continues with the 80's teen comedy, CAN'T BUY ME LOVE, starring Patrick Dempsey and Amanda Peterson (Rest in Pictures). Get a video version on our YouTube page, or get it ad-free at patreon.com/worsepeople. This classic 80s teen romp was filmed entirely in Tucson and actually takes place there as well. Nerdy ass Patrick Dempsey offers the head cheerleader $1000 to pretend to like him so he can be cool, and, in classic 80s fashion, she falls for him, but he's too self-absorbed to even notice. He starts to blow off his old friends, including Children of the Corn's Malachai, turning into a real shitheel, and, of course, hilarity ensues. This is a nostalgic classic for Jack and Whitney but a first-time watch for Derrick. You shit on my house!
Get more Bad Movies Worse People at patreon.com/worsepeople for only $3 a month. Every month you get a bonus Mental Health episode about a movie we love as well as a new installment of Latchkey Vids where we dive into long-forgotten 90s TV shows. You can also see ad-free videos for any episodes we do with video, including this one!
Check out our Star Wars podcast Han Took Shots First anywhere you get podcasts and hantookshotsfirstpod.com
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Transcript
Opening Jokes and Podcast Intro
00:00:00
Speaker
Welcome back, guys. To Bad Movies Wears People, this was my pick. This was her pick, and this is Made in Arizona Month. And this week, I don't know, you can't buy me love. You can. You can actually buy love, just so you know. but You can. I mean, it's not love. How do you think you got me? Well, and and you don't buy it, you rent it. Just kidding. Well, that's true.
00:00:53
Speaker
It's been a while since I've seen that, and those are just making me laugh and happy. Dude, our intro goes hard. Like, from the music to the fucking images. Like, Derek did well on that. And of course, Evasion just fucking slays. Slays. That dude from the Friday the 13th clip, the friend, looks an awful lot like Ricky. ah Not Ricky, ah the other one. Oh, yeah, yeah, the kind of the mole of the gentleman. Oh, but it's like both of them put together. Yeah, it's not either of them. Right. You guys know who Ricky is?
00:01:23
Speaker
Uh, wait, hold on. Ricky is the shorter one. Yeah. The crop top. The one with the half shirt the whole time. No. He is Rico. Suave. That's right. Gerardo. Suave.
Movie Setting and Nostalgia
00:01:41
Speaker
But it is made in Arizona a month and this time it's all Tucson. All Tucson. And I just want to point out in Tucson. I want to point out our intro didn't say our names, the podcast name, the nothing. It was just we're in a hurry. You know where you are. You know, bad movies, worse people. Derek, Whitney, Jack, Jack, DRCA. And we are talking about can't find me love from 1987. It actually takes place in Tucson, unlike our Patreon, which was all filmed in Tucson, but they're like, it's California. Yeah, this is L.A. Like, no, no, this is Tucson High, home of the Badgers. Yep. And they they drive. They hang out across the street from Casa video. They drive right past the loft.
00:02:27
Speaker
I'll tell you right now, like just even if I don't recommend this movie, I had such a fun time with nostalgia. Like there's old beer cans, there's old soda cans, there's old Dorito bags of chips. There's a fucking mall. Like all this stuff was just doing it for me. Even the girl with the fucking fried ass crimped hair. I like it. I see the one that's always wearing makeup that matches her hair stuff. Yeah. No, that's Patty. Oh, OK. Oh, wait. No, Patty's Patty's curly. The other one, Tammy.
00:02:55
Speaker
Barb, Barb, what? All right. There's Barb's and Pat's. There's since Barb, Tammy. and they Damn it. I'm saying bar Patty and cindy Cindy and Fran, who we barely see. Yeah. But we've seen her before. Yeah. Welcome back, Fran. Fran. The new girl that ah Quint was hitting on.
00:03:17
Speaker
Oh,
Amanda Peterson's Life and Career
00:03:18
Speaker
looks like Leah Thompson. She is Amy Dolan's who was previously on the podcast in ticks. She was the quote hot girl ah with the ah the not Mexican boyfriend.
00:03:31
Speaker
Yeah, correct which I'm pretty sure you and I called it then that she was in Can't Buy Me Love. Yeah, that's when you guys are talking about this movie. I might have agreed with you. But this is directed by Steve Rash. Oh, I've had one of those long. She just said it's so long ago. That was October.
00:03:51
Speaker
You know, many years ago that was. I can't even remember what we recorded on Monday. But Steve Rash directed. Did we record on Monday? Universal soldiers. this is great for That wasn't this Monday. That was not this Monday. I don't know. ah But this guy directed the Buddy Holly story with Gary Busey and son-in-law. Oh, so Jack's a fan.
00:04:19
Speaker
He also directed a whole bunch of those American pie road trip and bring it on sequels that no one knows. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Him and the making a mile in a American pie story.
00:04:31
Speaker
Yeah, that that kind of stuff. And then the writer, Michael Swerdlic. Sorry, Steve Rasch. If you do enough sword licks, you get a Steve Rasch. I'm sorry. Don't be looking at have any swords. This was the first thing he wrote. And the last thing he wrote that anybody saw, he did do a couple of episodes of Beverly Hills. ah The story for class act with, I think, Kitten play with their movies. And he did like five Mary Kate and Ashley movies. Jesus Christ.
00:05:01
Speaker
ah Nothing but trouble and No, New York minute. These guys did something to piss somebody off. And I mean, all I have. So Amanda Peterson and Patrick Dempsey star in this movie. Yeah. She was 15. He was 20. So she's 15 in this. Yeah. OK. That's why there's no kissing or anything. well it's just ah It's just a crazy actual high school or playing a high schooler that never happens. Well, it's playing a senior, which is weird.
00:05:30
Speaker
She quit acting in 94. And then she died in 2015 from a morphine overdose. oh And her family attributes her like downward spiral and her problems and stuff to some kind of traumatic event that happened during this movie.
00:05:49
Speaker
This particular movie. Yes. I don't know what the story is. I didn't look that far into it because I didn't want to be sad. okay The guy that's playing her college boyfriend looks like a real life piece of shit. I'm putting on him. Well, I'm wondering if that's part of the reason these two dudes, this director and writer didn't get to do a whole lot. Maybe something they did. I don't know. Yeah.
High School Memories and Cliques
00:06:13
Speaker
Um, but that'll bring us down. I'm glad you got that out of the way before I made jokes. Yeah. So now we can make jokes. Yeah. She did get her start. She played Annie on a. No, she was one of the dancers. One of the orph one of the orphans. Yeah. Annie. So is one of the other girls here. I believe it was Patty. Yeah. No, it was Barbara. te Tina. Kaspari. They're doing the hard knock life, right? Yeah. Currently, they were orphan dancers. Currently hair, or crimpy hair.
00:06:44
Speaker
Curly. Curly is Barb. Crimpy is Patty. Got it. Patty has glitter and like paint that matches her. album Oh, she'll be forever known as Crimpy McPats. OK. And fun fact about her, she also played Kelly in the unaired pilot of Married with Children. Oh, they did a good call. Yeah.
00:07:05
Speaker
Oh yeah. Applegate way back. If you can get Applegate, you get Applegate, man. She also quit acting in 1994. Wow, man, something happened on the set of this fucking movie and it doesn't sound consensual. Well, this movie was in 87. Yeah, well, also filmed in 86, even worse.
00:07:22
Speaker
So we start out with Patrick Dempsey playing Ronald, but he'll just be Patrick Dempsey McDreamy coming from by the way. I'm Rarik. I don't know no Rarik I'm out of the country But, yeah, he's ah he was in Grey's Anatomy for, I don't know, an episode or two, right? And like five seasons, six. I was like, I'm like, I've never watched it. So, yeah, that sounds about right. Oh, he is. He is gray. Well, she laughs and says like five or six seasons as if there are 27 seasons of that show.
00:08:00
Speaker
That's like being in four episodes of the soap operas. There's a girl I dated that I should have known not to date because I asked her her top three favorite sitcoms and she mentioned Grey's Anatomy as her favorite sitcom. Exactly. Should have known right there. That's not a sitcom. Maybe she was getting it confused with scrubs. I thought I would teach her a lesson and I had her move in with me and just ruined each other's life. So got you back in the in the long run.
00:08:24
Speaker
Time is a sweet revenge. And Patrick Dempsey,
Unreleased Movie Content and Cast Discussion
00:08:30
Speaker
he'll be back because he's in Sweet Home Alabama. He's in some of those Bridget Jones movies. He's in Scream 3, Loverboy. Loverboy is definitely going to be done.
00:08:43
Speaker
yeah Yeah, that's the pizza one, right? Yeah, it was made right after this one. That's about buying love. That is in fact about buying love. Yeah. Can I get a pizza with extra love? Well, you tell me the difference. I love sex. And this movie was remade with Nick Cannon and somebody else, and it was a love don't cost a thing. Oh, I'm guessing Gabrielle Union because I love her. I think I would like to see her kiss Nick Cannon. If that's right, that's awesome. I think you are right. I think you are correct.
00:09:12
Speaker
And have you guys ever seen the movie Explorers? Yes, the young kids that build a spaceship. Yeah. Yeah. apparently No, I haven't. That's the that's the only other thing I recognize from Amanda Peterson's credits ah besides any obvious. OK. Yeah, I mean, yeah, it might just be because I haven't seen this movie in a while, but I kept thinking, I was like, what the fuck else do I know her from? And it could be just that she's a very pretty blonde girl playing ah like she's doing the role. How many times have you seen this movie?
00:09:43
Speaker
yeah I don't know. I don't know. No, I knew you were talking to me. I just couldn't think about it because it's been one of the grand total of one. this First time? time Yeah. yeah cool Well, I watched it on TBS or whatever a lot. So let's focus more on the fact that Derek went most of his life without watching this. I had this on VHS growing up, and and I watched it at least four times a year. Speaking of first view, we filmed Harley Davidson and Marlboro Man on Monday. That's what we filmed. That's what it was. I may have seen it if they had released the R-rated cut that was supposed to come out. Oh, no. Because it was supposed to be a raunchier movie. Yeah, you're supposed to see Patti's titties. Oh, man. I kind of want the rated R-cut. She has one of the best lines, dude. I'm sorry. I want a cut to it. But like, have you ever seen a tit this beautiful? There's only one like it.
00:10:35
Speaker
This line that line works like that is such a great fight. Not that this chick needs a line. She's got two boobs and curly hair. Well, I'm going to assume that if you would like to find her breasts, it will be easy because Patty and played by Darcy Dimas, by the way. ah The two movies I recognize from her credits are Friday the 13th, part six, Jason Lives.
00:11:01
Speaker
Which again one that comes after the Doug movie that we did or whatever the fuck his name was the Doug movie I'll never remember Roy Roy, I always want to say Doug and I don't know why release the Doug cut He looks like a dog. And then she's also in a movie called Vice Academy three. I'll let you go ahead and fill in what you think that might be about. Doesn't matter. It's the third one. They're showing boobs. I know that the first one does. So I'm assuming the second and third one also do. They knew they knew what made their money. Give me that boombabies. But so we start with Patrick Dempsey. I want to see the two most beautiful tits in the world. There they are.
00:11:44
Speaker
using a riding mower in Tucson. And I was telling Whitney, I was like, sure, this is a big lawn, but where the fuck did he buy that? I don't think its yeah in Tucson sells a riding there. Yeah, I'm sorry. One straight rock, one straight rock. And these windows are fucking done. Yeah. um This is the house that ah my boss's friend lived in growing up.
00:12:03
Speaker
Oh, OK. I mean, it's so fucking Tucson, like inside and out. Inside has that fucking Sonoran desert, fucking earth tones. A bunch of appropriated Native American culture is art. This is up off Fort Lowell, kind of close to where Tucson Hopshop is. The house. OK. Yeah. Near Trident 2. Electric Boogaloo.
00:12:27
Speaker
Because IMDB very helpfully has like the addresses when they do movies that are in ah like an obscure place like Tucson. I'm sorry. Derek just said IMDB was helpful. It was because there's always some dude who lives in whatever said city is. That's like, well, this is that this exact address. And I'm able to look it up and go, oh, shit, I know that place. I got my first hand job behind the house. Fun fact, I came in my pants. I didn't even get it out. You know who probably put that address on there? Your boss's friend. he's like I know where this was filmed. um And then you got scoops, which I've
00:13:02
Speaker
Which is now a Los Betos. Yeah, it's now a Los Betos across the street from Casa video. Hey, you you you evolve or you die. And I think they evolved. Well, you see Casa video there across the street. You see him drive but past the loft, which is right up the road there. So ah Kenneth or Malachi from yeah had Malachi, please. and Derek's like, we're calling him Malachi. Yeah. But that's what else would you call him? He lives in Tucson for a bit.
00:13:29
Speaker
His house is, you were saying. It's in Winter Haven. Winter Haven. Over on Christmas. Makes sense. It's only Christmas Avenue or some shit. Yeah, right there. Friend of the show, Bleep, who's, he's actually lived in the apartment complex that this dude lived in.
00:13:43
Speaker
Oh wow. Like at the same time? Yeah. Not the same apartment. Was he scared all the time or? Terrified. Because I would be. It's the reason it took us so long to become friends. He's like, I just, he's like, I have a thing against gingers for whatever reason. I don't know why. but in To this day, Bleep will not go into a cornfield with me. ah Guess what? If he does, he ain't coming out.
00:14:05
Speaker
so But Patrick Dempsey is mowing the lawn. That's what he does for money. And he's such a nerd with his curly hair and his glasses. Dude, he needs to get she's all that and nerd. i've yeah Look what I married.
00:14:19
Speaker
i No, it's i even watching as like you ain't covering that up, dude. Well, they do. She's all that him because like she literally just takes off his glasses, takes off mrs jamess his hair, takes off his sleeves and she's like there now you're hot. The hat that she takes off of him, she is then wearing three scenes later. Because she was jealous. First of all, don't wear a beret unless you want to get beat up at school or you go to school in France. That's the two fucking rules of berets. Or if you're Doug's sister from the cartoon Doug, not from Friday the 13th. Yeah, not the Doug cut. You went to school in France, I'm sure of it. Girls can wear them. Prince will write a song about it. Yeah, well, it has to be raspberry, though.
00:15:03
Speaker
Well, or Jane from Daria. Yeah, I guess she wore one. She's she's I had to do a glasses change. um But so. So he's mowing the lawn. The girls all come back to the house here and you can see that like they're the stupid, like ditzy, shallow yeah girls, it's like her mom's like, I said, only use the name and Marcus card. And she's like, sorry, mom. Cool.
00:15:30
Speaker
My mom would have beat my ass if she had credit cards for me to steal. Yeah. And we do watch the ah they watch Bobby on TV, who is her boyfriend who went away to school in Iowa. And he's she's like, he's going to say my name. And he's like, I miss my hydrotherapy machine. Yeah. I mean, this guy was a this guy's a fucking college recruit. He is banging everybody at that campus, not even thinking about this 15 year old.
00:15:55
Speaker
Fun fact about Bobby, he's played by a guy named George Gray, who has been the Price is Right announcer since 2010.
00:16:05
Speaker
Interesting. Let's see what we've got for him. A brand new Cabriolet. I also love this brand new one in 2010. I love this parking lot for the same reason. I like all an old nostalgia shit. dude All these cars that are brand new at the time. Oh, I know. They're like, look at that car. And I'm like, that fucking beater. Yeah. but Yes, they are going to school at Tucson High. We we meet Quintan. I think it's just Quentin, but they always say Quintan. Yeah. Yeah, he's doing an inflection almost like um
00:16:43
Speaker
ah Dolomite from like the blaxploitation thing. Yeah, Taun is here. Have no fear. And then even Big John calls him an asshole. So maybe he is doing like, I don't know, black voice. Yeah, that's possible. It's actually like like that he seems like the type. OK, but this guy is played by Court McCown, who we'll see again when I make you guys watch Auntie Lee's meat pies. That sounds delicious. for Halloween horror fest. I'm pretty sure the meat pies are people, Whitney.
00:17:11
Speaker
it's You know, it's called Long Pig. It's a movie about a house full of hot chicks who pick up dudes as hitchhikers and then bring them back, slaughter them, cook them, and then sell the pies to town. That's why I wouldn't be in that movie. I'm like, what's this hot chick interested in me for? You're trying to cook me. aren't And we have Big John, you mentioned, played by Eric Bruce Cotter, who Whitney was trying to tell me he's in Major League Two. He's the guy im here pitchch I saw. But I don't remember him. He's the catcher that that's what it is. He's the catcher that can't hit. So he has to quote.
00:17:42
Speaker
ah Playboy like articles. Well, I recognize him from Starship Troopers. Of course. He's he's the big dumb guy. He says that he was just a big dumb guy right before he gets his fucking head blown off in live fire practice. Like the big guy. He is the big dumb guy. He's also in the Bruce Lee story. Dragon. drag Yeah. Dragon. The Bruce Lee story. He plays a big dumb guy. It's weird. At first I saw him and I was like, is that coach's friend? And I was like, no, that time doesn't line up. No.
00:18:12
Speaker
You know, Dauber, yes, but Dauber is he is in an episode of Cheers. Is he? Mm hmm. And he looks. I mean, exactly. Well, I guess this would be about the same time. Well, I mean, Starship Troopers is a decade after this, and he looks exactly the same. He's still playing a high schooler, but Starship Troopers has mighty more from Power Rangers syndrome. Yes. 97. Yeah, Starship Troopers was 97. I thought it was like 94. Now, Kasper Van Dean, bro.
00:18:40
Speaker
Um, but yeah, so we do see that Patrick Dempsey and his friends, they're like, they're the big nerds, but they do go to all the school games and whatnot. The visitor section. Exactly. Cause they don't want to sit near the cool kids. Well, because they got beat up if they didn't go. Like some jock was like, didn't see you at the game Saturday. but they have no Saturday. Didn't see you on the game on Friday. Well, we didn't want to get it beat up by you. Well, now you didn't go. So you're going to get beat up.
00:19:06
Speaker
but you in his hands i Wait, which part? The part I said about pooping in somebody else's pants? Yes. you No, about being a big jock beating up nerds. That's the funny thing, though. like I might have been a jock, but I was also a big fucking nerd. I was a jock, so nobody knew how nerdy I was. Hey, look, I hit people on the football field. So don't look at my backpack of the sketches of me and Princess Leia. So, I remember high school, I was literally friends with every genre of friends you could have. Like, I was friends with the jocks, I was friends with the stoners, I was friends with the geeks, I was friends with the freaks. I mean, we're talking late 90s. It was a better, not perfect, I'm sure somebody out there listening got bullied to shit and that sucks, but it was better. Like, late 90s, we all bonded over fucking weed.
00:19:51
Speaker
You're like, oh, man, that nerd grows some great crop. There was like groups of people in my school, but it's nothing like you see in movies like yeah movies are the extreme version. It's always like, I don't know. it's it It was never like that. It was like, you know, I didn't hang out with them.
00:20:06
Speaker
No way. Drugs from them. It was way different in my school. We had this group of five people that all wore the same color all the time, like each of them wore a different color. There was a red, a blue, a yellow, a black, a green. They would skydive. They were really cool because they could buy alcohol, rent a car. We could use their AARP card to get into places like it was dope. They could get you that nickel coffee in the morning.
00:20:37
Speaker
Well, it's time to get to biology. They always disappeared in the middle of class, though. Yeah, were real weird. They they were a students, too. I didn't get it. I think that they were scaredy cats because every time there was a big crisis, they ran just right out of classroom. I think went home and hid. Yeah, I i actually had the same kids because you you could never find them when the city was being destroyed by a monster from outer space. Yeah, but they were always at the after parties. Yeah.
00:21:02
Speaker
But we all went to different schools. How did we have the same group of people? They didn't know which school they went to. ah Well, they keep getting kicked out, so they go to another one. ah Speaking of older people who are creepy We meet rock who is Cindy's mom's boyfriend and I only want to mention him because he's a fucking creep She's wearing I was she wearing a bikini She's wearing a bikini in there and she's got a road up shirt and this thing though like are there a button up beauty beauty runs in the family and it really yeah fast
00:21:32
Speaker
i'm like she at best she's supposed to be 1718 here's the thing you're banging her mom knock it off like that's it you already got it thought it was your sister and it wasn't even like that line's terrible the line Derek said was terrible but it's his fucking eyes are just like oh ah like put her clothes back on when you're done
00:21:55
Speaker
And we go to Patrick Dempsey's house. His name is Rock and he's a hunk. Nice choice of words, mom. Hunk of shit. Hunk of shit is right. We go to Patrick Dempsey's house, meet his dad, played by Dennis Dugan.
00:22:09
Speaker
I was like, babe, you remember him. You recognize him, right? He's like, no. Well, when she first said it's when he's outside washing the car, once they were inside the house, I recognized him. He is Doug Thompson from Happy Gilmore. He's the guy that runs the the the the course golf thing. Yeah. Yeah.
00:22:26
Speaker
He's also in Back to Doug Daddy. He's also but in Big Daddy. His credit is reluctant trick or treat giver. ah If you guys remember that. but Oh, yeah. Where Adam Sandler goes into the house and forces him to. He's like, he was you like this watch.
00:22:42
Speaker
What else do you got? The kid likes to watch. What else? ah He's also in another Adam Sandler. That's my point. Yeah, he's in. I was scrolling through his credits real quick and I he's in probably 15 or 16 Adam Sandler movies. OK, it's all like no name characters. I think it's after after playing Doug. He's just like, Doug, I'll get a paycheck. I'll get a paycheck. Yeah. Adam Sandler is like, hey, I like you. and You want to show up? And then we meet his ah little brother.
00:23:11
Speaker
Also, welcome back. hanging out on ti dolins and tick yeah mr soh this is ah This is an early young Seth Green. I know he had done some things beforehand, but not really much. Yeah, I was going to say, it during tics, we were like, oh, an early Seth Green. Dude, he hasn't grown into his teeth in this one yet. yeah His teeth are ten sizes too big. He stopped growing up though. He hadn't even gone ginger yet.
00:23:35
Speaker
Yeah. Well, you try to avoid it. It was really dark. You see how you see how we get treated. We're all just chilled into the corn over here. As dark as Jax looks in the shadows right now. That's it's just a super dark red. So there's this party where Cindy has this awful, awful suede jacket that everybody's very into. It's a suede outfit. Suede was. Yeah, I was going to say suede was hot in the 80s. These fucking tassels shit like.
00:24:03
Speaker
There's no later in the movie yeah it western It's after the turn it's after the turn of the movie where everyone starts hating on McDreamy He's starting like try to give somebody a high-five and they cold shoulder him and it's like no It's cuz you have French you have tassels on your jacket. Nobody wants to high-five that but because you'res so yeah It's only important because Quintan spills some cheap dessert wine on her jacket. Yeah. what is He's trying to be classy. According to the IMDB trivia, he's walking around talking about how he's a wine connoisseur. But apparently what he's what he's pouring is ripple, which is a very cheap dessert wine. But it's important because he spills it on her jacket. So the next day she has to go to the mall to try to return it. Of course, they're not going to take it. He sold me this with a ah red wine stain on it. This has Mad Dog all over it. ah well um Excuse me, why does it smell like tequila rose? and But it doesn't know tequila rose. Sorry, it's a strawberry milk tequila. Oh, God. Yeah, I had my friend Jesse ah rest in peace there. Oh, that's right. Rest well rest in pictures because he was in ah two of my short films. But all right. He he used to love tequila rose. Really? Yeah.
00:25:21
Speaker
Thank you, because he could just drink it quickly. Oh, it'll do it'll do the job. I couldn't drink it quickly. That was something I drank in like middle school. Strawberry milk. It might have been when he was liberating it from the store. We worked that together. That might be why he loved it so much. There you go. Tastes like revolt. But.
00:25:42
Speaker
Patrick Dempsey is there to buy this expensive ass telescope. I did this guy trying to sell it to him. He's like, it's ah oh, look, it doesn't give you the upside down image. It gives you an erect image. And he sees Cindy and he's like, oh, I see the erection. I know exactly what you're talking about.
00:25:59
Speaker
But so he goes over and offers to buy her this $1,000 suit instead of, or whatever outfit, instead of his telescope, if she will pretend to like him for one month. And we all know that this is gonna go really, really well. Oh yeah, actually it actually does.
00:26:16
Speaker
It does actually go pretty well. Actually, like he's got like four days of being an outcast at the end of this movie. Yeah. I think it's a couple. I think it's like a month. OK. Well, you could trade it off. Still, it's probably the best as that this situation could have gone.
00:26:31
Speaker
Yes. But I do like that it cuts to them and she's just like, you want to rent me? like Excuse the fuck out of me. I wanted it a little bit better than that, I promise. But she does make the
Plot Developments and Character Transformations
00:26:45
Speaker
deal. No hand holding, no kissing. And I get to take lunches off. yeah And he says for lunches. Yeah, there's a whole lunch negotiation. Yeah. How about no hand kissing? But we are allowed to hold lips.
00:27:00
Speaker
Quintan does come up to them while they're hanging out at lunch. And he's like, hey, losers sit to the left. But Cindy, even though she's doing this for the money, she is does do a nice thing. She's like, well, I guess you need to go sit on the right then. That's where the asshole sit. I want to walk right over there.
00:27:18
Speaker
It's not my people. Oh shit. I've been sitting in the wrong place for three years. Well, he's been laying up her ass since Bobby left and she wants nothing to do with him. Oh, she does tell him, hey, go hit the showers, make it a cold one. Yeah. Dude, everybody here wants to bang everybody's boyfriend, girlfriend or ex.
00:27:35
Speaker
Yeah, we're friends, we share, right? That was not a thing when I was in high school. This this is bang high. You were exiled if you went for your friends. This is a progressive school, okay? A progressive school.
00:27:51
Speaker
But she's making excuses for him because they're like, don't you always go to the games in the visitor section? She's like, yeah, it's psychological warfare, dude. she's He's over there to fuck with the other team. That means he's he's tougher than any of you. That's the best yeah spirit there is. She's good. Yeah. She does a great job.
00:28:09
Speaker
I like when he goes to pick her up for their date and or to this party and the mom is like, oh, did I forget to pay you? Yeah. Well, I'm here for Cindy. She's like, who's my folks? I said, what are you doing here?
00:28:23
Speaker
i'm sorry I rented your daughter. It's this whole thing. I wouldn't worry about it. It's just, you know, no hand holding. So you get a fun montage of them, like actually having feelings for each other and having feelings for her right before the montage. Big John Farts and Seth Green's face. OK.
00:28:47
Speaker
It's the second time. He's nice enough at this party to go to the witness. This is the this is the first one. Nope. Cause he is at the window. That's what um that's what're that's that's what we're at. Oh, the party. Okay. He is nice enough at this party to go to the window to fart. I've done this at my house. You can ask the bleeps. I will just walk up to my, cause I have a security door. I'll open the wooden door. Just put my butt to it just in case it's a real ripper.
00:29:09
Speaker
and then Because guess what, ladies? I'm a gentleman. I'll fart right outside of your house. We didn't mention Seth Green is following them around because he's like, dude, something's up with my brother. He's not fucking weird anymore. Yeah, I feel like he's weirder now, but but but he's not a mutant or an outcast. People like him. I've met my brother. Fuck that dude.
00:29:29
Speaker
Hey guys, I'm getting really antsy today. I've been in the house a couple days. um I want to get out. Can we go somewhere? I have some things to do. I mean, I don't know if you know this music box, ah the adult beverage place that is, they have live music almost like minimum twice a week, sometimes much more. And like as a fan of somebody that likes staying on the east side, I can't think of a place that does as much live music with zero cover.
00:29:51
Speaker
Can I get shots there? You can get shots there. You can get drinks there. You can get beers there. You can get pudding shots. You can get yellow shots. You're putting me on. I am not putting you on. This is real. Oh, they've got karaoke. They've got unhappy hour every Wednesday. You know I love karaoke. Saturday nights, they've got open mic stand up comedy. Yeah, so there's plenty going on over the music box. We can go down there to 6951 East 22nd Street in Tucson, Arizona. Oh, right there at 22nd and Cole. Yeah. Did I mention no cover? Like, everything we just talked about is no cover. No cover. No cover charge ever. Just drink alcohol and enjoy your friends. It's just like my insurance. There's no cover. Music box lounge. Check it out. All right. First round's on me, boys.
00:30:38
Speaker
Hey, guys. I don't want to sound needy here. I'm needy. But we have a Patreon at patreon dot.com slash first people. And it only costs three dollars a month. Three dollars a month is nothing. And I know times are hard right now. Real hard for me. Inflation's up. You can't afford your groceries. Can't eat. But you can't afford three dollars a month if you love us. Give us three dollars. Super love us. Please love us. We're not we're not begging. I'm begging. We're not pleading. I'm pleading. We're not down on our knees. Oh boy. My my knees hurt. They've been on the oven so long. But we do kind of need the money. I need the money bad. We need new equipment.
00:31:16
Speaker
We need to do equipment. We need to do remote podcasts for all of you. I wouldn't mind eating. We need to have video. I wouldn't mind eating. ah We need more drinks. Food sounds good. So please check out patreon dot.com slash worst people. Please check us out. You get a bonus episode every month and we're going to have more content coming for you. I'll send you pictures. ah Thank you guys. Thank you so much. Please give me patreon dot.com. I'm being held hostage here. Slash worst people. I don't see all you out of here. They're going to kill me.
00:31:44
Speaker
And there's this ah nice moment where Patrick Dempsey is washing Cindy's car with the door open. I don't know if you noticed that, but her driver's side door is just open. and I'm like, what?
00:31:55
Speaker
what That's a cabriolet. You just take the fucking top down and drive fast. Yeah. And he's telling her like, you can do anything you set your heart to. I believe in you because he's still nice at this point. Yeah. And so she goes to get her poetry poetry and share it with him. And he's like, well, let's keep this safe. And he throws it in the car with the puddles of water. And you know what? I like this poetry. I'm just going to set it right here in this water. Oh, no, it's all gone. Now your poems are lost forever.
00:32:22
Speaker
I still have them in my brain. Don't worry. They will come to fruition. And it didn't come around um because she's she's like, nobody knows about this and whatever. And it did come around. But I thought it was going to be like a thing where he like puts her on blast in front of everybody about her poetry or but he just uses it to get laid. He could have gone like he could have a school assembly in the gymnasium and just started reading it to everybody.
00:32:47
Speaker
You know, say like, hey, look, this is how proud I am. And I really don't care what these people think about me. Trying to get me a pants girl, trying to get in that pants suede pantsuit. So they go on this date to the Boneyard, which is very romantic. I mean, I want to date the Boneyard. Oh, I was going to say, I hope most dates end in the Boneyard, but I didn't know that this is what they call it the graveyard. And I was just like,
00:33:13
Speaker
yeah the phone it's it's affectionately known as the boneyard here in tucson in case you're not from here it is an airplane graveyard we've had it on the show before uh transformers did it yeah almost every time well that's patreon if you want to hear us talk about this again this month give me three bucks
00:33:30
Speaker
And I mean, it was the only scene in the dungeon master from last year's made in Arizona. I just I told her I was like, of course there because they were going to look over the wall and she's like the boneyard and not like she didn't already know. And I was like, of course they're going to the boneyard. It's a film made in Tucson. Yeah, that was the cold but that that specific spot right there is off of coal.
00:33:51
Speaker
Well, and they also just break into an Air Force facility yeah and don't get murdered. I know. So i don't try this at home. You will get shot. um And then like there's this part where they're looking through the telescope at this ah photograph of the moon. By the way, this is the telescope that he made.
00:34:08
Speaker
Yeah. he's Oh, that is cool. Cardboard tube. That is cool. But for the moon, you could rather you just have somebody dress up as a moon with some high school stage production. but You can literally see the paper flapping while they're trying to look at like, it's like, oh, look, it's the moon. And I'm like, I can see the turn off the fan.
00:34:28
Speaker
I do love Patrick Dempsey's ah positivity and hope here because he's like ah by the time I'm my dad's age, people will be living and working on the moon. probably Maybe even me like you hopeful bastard. You got a fun NASA. We're not going back to the moon because that's where Hitler writes his dinosaur. ah And nobody wants that smoke.
00:34:50
Speaker
But this is the point where he's like, hey, there's something important we have to discuss. And she's falling in love with him. Yeah, she is. And it's like i he is so fucking blind. Yeah, it's frustrating because yes, look at her. and Look at her because she's like got these fucking she's got the eyes for you. She's leaning in for a fucking kiss. And you're just like, so how do I bang your friends is what I'd like to get to. And all she has to say is like, hey, by the way, like deals off. I just like you. Yeah. Well, exactly. That's what I told Whitney. I was like, I don't know how you like this movie because one of my biggest this is your biggest has like biggest pet peeve is just fucking open your goddamn mouth. Yeah. Because put another person's mouth on it.
00:35:35
Speaker
She's leaning over for a kiss and she's like, because he's like, we have to discuss something. She's like, we shouldn't talk about it too much. And he's like, no, it's important. It's like our big breakup. Yeah. Like what? the I was I was mad at this part and was like, God damn it. I know we have a movie coming up and that's why we're doing it. But just look over and kiss her.
00:35:52
Speaker
Yeah, ah they do. they They talk about the breakup and how should it be a big thing? Should it be whatever? And he's she's like, well, I wouldn't want to damage your reputation. And then he geeks out on his reputation. Yeah. Instead of getting her like biting undertone there, like wouldn't want to fuck up your reputation. It wasn't selling shit. I have a reputation. We do.
00:36:16
Speaker
ah Reputation. He's celebrating like ah we just got done recording the skeleton the last skeleton crew episode. He's celebrating like Wim's dad after they make that motorcycle jump.
00:36:30
Speaker
He made the same noise as as having a reputation as that guy did for his son being alive. say but like She comes up to him at school and clearly she wants to talk to him here. like She's like, we should just have a talk. and so But he starts playing. He starts acting, putting on a show for all his friends now. It is a combination of things.
00:36:53
Speaker
I think it's he's doing what he agreed to because he's assuming that she never got into him because he's just a fucking idiot. Yeah, but you don't have to do what this mean. No, like you can just he wants to preserve his reputation. There's a better way to do it than taking somebody else down. Kids out there listening, turn off the podcast. But also, if you didn't, this is not how you get ahead in life. its Also, you don't have to turn it off. and Well, they're not going to listen to.
00:37:22
Speaker
Little fucking shithead over here just biting on my butt cheek. Not Whitney, my cat. I mean, it is right there. Oh, but yeah, he plays up the the whole thing. He does a very big production. You draped yourself all over me like a cheap suit. I'm pumped because of you.
00:37:41
Speaker
I'm dry man you see for a moment all the cool kids watching it and they have this like it's all like a moment of like wait do we hate him now like yeah for just a second and then one of the girls is like he's such a Heartbreaker. Yeah. Well, in all the guys, this movie, whoever wrote it, or maybe it's the directors, we love treating women like shit right here. I mean, and and not right here in this part of the movie, in the whole movie, like this era. It was the genre. The guy on the date with her later. I mean, it's like they just- The douche in the Camaro?
00:38:17
Speaker
The Porsche Porsche. Yeah. Yeah, and it's just you know, it worked for a time for people But this is specifically like all these guys are watching like oh, yeah, he fucking destroyed her. That means I like him Yeah, he treats women like poop. We're friends Yeah, yeah, it sucks he broke up there but uh, what kind of wine is she like what's her thoughts on ripple? She like a nice Oh reasoning. But I love like they talk a little bit afterward at her house and she's like, look, just stay yourself. Don't change. And he's like me. I would never change. Hard cut to completely different person. Want to be Christian Bale from American Psycho. Look back, hair is not doing it for me at all. No, you have those beautiful wavy McDreamy locks. I can let him flow. And I like that one of the girls, Patty, I think is like, oh, what'd you do with your hair? He's like, oh, this is just a little moose and Cindy's walking by and she's like, you have 43 pounds. Yeah. So, yeah, he goes out on a date with Barb to scoops.
00:39:25
Speaker
which also still has a sign from a previous building, Tucson Tuxedos or Tuxedos of Tucson or something. Yeah, I was wondering about that because I was like, is that a place that exists now? I mean, it's a Los Beitos now. No, it still has a Tuxedo sign. But I mean, what is an a Los Beitos in Tucson? Coronados. Filibertos. Nikos. Viva.
00:39:51
Speaker
Um, Seth Green is hiding in the trunk again. Cause apparently he's got nothing better to do than follow his brother. Trunk is, trunk is a, uh, close,
Humorous School Events and Misadventures
00:40:00
Speaker
closed word. This is a fucking bed. This is not just a station wagon. This is like a seventies station wagon that is just long and lean and slow.
00:40:10
Speaker
But Patrick Dempsey does see him and and Big John's like, oh, man, I got a fucking I know that face. I know that face. So we just turn him and put his butt right on top of Seth. creek I just I like it, but I just don't want to get back in that car. He's like an hour later, but I just tasted Big John. They left the window open. ah Teresa, he had Teresa. Heavy.
00:40:35
Speaker
um But while he's on a date with Barb now Patti's like hey, you're taking me to the dance This is when we get the we're friends we share friends share I was And Patrick Dempsey wants to learn how to dance from American Bandstand perfectly reasonable. Yeah, this is not American Bandstand I mean, you know what just ask your mom if you could just go full fucking nerd and be like mom help me learn how to dance Mom doesn't know how to cool people dance. That's why it's ultimate nerd you think bandstand knows how to dance cool people I That's where people were learning to dance. I didn't even know Bandstand was still a thing in 87. Put on Soul Train. That was still the 70s. I think he thought he was watching Soul Train because he turns it on and it's two black people dancing and they're doing this dance. And I'm like, this is clearly not well, Seth Green spotlight special. I think the dancing works really well for this 80s cocaine culture like this. i I could see this dance being done at the club of Earth Girls are Easy.
00:41:35
Speaker
the The actual dance that the two black actors are doing on the PBS special that it turns out he's watching. keley That could work. Yes. The one that Patrick Dempsey interprets from it. Well, because he's twitchy. He's he's having a seizure. That would never work. He's never had sex. He doesn't know how he doesn't have rhythm yet. Hey, wait. I don't have rhythm. He waited 17 and a half years for some tit.
00:42:02
Speaker
as he says. My sex is a lot like Dubstep.
00:42:07
Speaker
Excuse me? Wait, once it starts, you wish it was over? This joke works a lot better if my wife's not on the podcast. Yeah, I know. It's easy to be self-deprecating when your wife's sitting there like, no, he's a wonderful lover, very generous. He is very generous. He's got all the rhythm.
00:42:29
Speaker
oh I'm crying. Having having sex with Derek is like watching old people paint. It's slow and sloppy. And someone dies. Someone's definitely clutching their chest. I die a little every time.
00:42:45
Speaker
Oh, so they go to the Columbus Day dance, which is just a weird dance to have. Yeah. OK. All right, Tucson. Well, Arizona did vote to celebrate Columbus Day over Martin Luther King Day back then around this time.
00:43:01
Speaker
Yeah, we didn't have a Martin Luther King day off school, but we had rodeo break. Yep. Put rubber bands on both testicles. We got a piece of cake and a piece of cake for MLK day and Columbus day. Did you? Yeah. In middle school.
00:43:18
Speaker
My school didn't give cake. Well, um you know what? The Columbus and cake is interesting because I just walked up to somebody else's and said, I found it. So I got all the cake. Oh, look, there's some cake that's undiscovered. That's my cake. I don't hear anything. If it's Columbus Day cake, you walked up to someone and said, look, cake that's not discovered. And they were like, this is pie.
00:43:39
Speaker
Oh, well, it's my cake now.
00:43:45
Speaker
um But he does get a little drunk and he starts doing his African anteater dance or whatever they call it. and Yeah. um Which is recognized immediately. I saw this on PBS earlier. He's kind of butchering. It's a little derivative of the Swahili anteater dance, if I'm being totally honest, but know good for him for trying.
00:44:05
Speaker
yeah But oh, and we do have one girl that's like, oh, he must be special ed. Yeah, which I mean, we're we're we're pushing the our joke, but it's still kind of funny. Well, it's girls like, oh, and it's funny that she says, oh, instead of like making fun of the special ed. Yeah. But, hey, Big John says if the ronsters doing it, it must be new. Yeah, god we love nicknames. The ronster.
00:44:33
Speaker
So now the whole school is doing it. And you know what? I saw that Paula Abdul is credited as the choreographer for this movie and shame on her.
00:44:44
Speaker
Guess who just wanted a pill check? I mean, paycheck. Shut up now, Tommy. But so they go back to scoops and ah Cindy and Patrick Dempsey get a little bit of a fight because she's there with her ah frat boy boyfriend. This boy's such a douche. I mean, he's a bit here. What's his name? Brent. Brent. Brent. I do like Patrick Dempsey. He's like, you like I biff and she's like, no, Brent. He's like, is there a difference? Yeah, his name is Brenton.
00:45:17
Speaker
um
00:45:20
Speaker
i don't I can't understand my own notes. Go on. Party pulls out the girls. I think I think my phone auto corrected something. Party pulls out the girls. Oh, Patty's in the car. patie hey This is where we get. Oh, Patty pulls out her girls. Boom, boom. The two best looking tits in America. and That's one of the chances they're right next to each other. I do like that. She's just like, what, do you like long distance relationships? No. You know, reach out and touch someone.
00:45:49
Speaker
ring I was like, Patty. I've used that line. I wanted her to start dropping a bunch of like slogans like, hey, where's the beef? Taste the rainbow. That was in the 90s, but still.
00:46:05
Speaker
but Got milk. I'm loving it. Have it your way.
00:46:14
Speaker
but Your way right away. I can't think of another one. Fresh delivery. Need a little excitement? Snap into a Slim Jim. Eat me.
00:46:30
Speaker
Oh, but yes, I like how they cut back to him at home and it looks like he's jerking off. Yeah, it does. Under the blanket with a light. I'm like, you don't need to see it. How do you jerk off? Well, what you don't know is he has sketched a titty off memory. And this is we don't have Internet porn here, guys. You've got to get a look at a titty after you snap into a Slim Jim. You got to sketch it. He's got to sketch down to have premium cable. So. Oh, yeah. That's how we seem to.
00:46:59
Speaker
Cause he says because she's like, have you ever seen something like this? He's like, Oh, my parents do a premium cable. Uh, yeah. I watched national geographic a lot. So I'm pretty familiar with suits. Did she be so bad? I was nine watching this. It's PG 13. It's PG 13. That's a suggestion. Like you can't be over 13 and enjoy it.
00:47:22
Speaker
Well, my sister was 13, so it's fine. There you go. It's 17 years, three months and five days. Long time to wait for a tit. Yeah, it is. Malachi is trying to befriend Patrick Dempsey again. Malachi, by the way, is a guy named court say was Courtney Gaines yeah is the name. Malachi. But I just I mean, it also in the movie is Kenneth. But yeah, he is Malachi.
00:47:46
Speaker
Um, he was one of the ones at the beginning when he was like, you recognize him, right? And I was like, no, like she kept saying it. And I was like, I don't recognize these people. And she's like, maybe it's just because I watched this movie a hundred times and they're all i'm surprised. You don't recognize him though. Malachi he did the very first again. It's like the wide shots where it's like you just see a guy with red hair, walk up and start talking to Patrick Dempsey while he's mowing lawns.
00:48:09
Speaker
She's like, you recognize him, right? And I'm like, no, is that the big brother, Pete, from Pete and Pete? Like, I don't know who this is. I see that he has red hair. Well, it's not like this is a 4K restoration. It was decent, but all those redheads look alike, dude. That's why I grew out the beard, the hair and the ponytail and ah put the glasses on. At least you can describe that about me.
00:48:31
Speaker
Which redhead? Beard, glasses, pony? Oh, yeah. I'm out of the biking. But like this is where we see that Patrick Dempsey is more worried about being cool than being in school. Yeah, he is too cool for school. He's got his sunglasses on and he's just sleeping through ah astronomy class, which is his favorite thing. and It's about the moon. He knows everything about the moon. He's taking a night off. Yeah, it's fair.
00:48:55
Speaker
Have we either were getting to it or we ah passed it, but like he blew off his friend's poker night. Yeah. Yeah. We passed it. That was for the party, the first party. Yeah. Yeah. So it just, it's gotten worse and worse. I mean, cause now like he won't even speak to Malachi at school. Now he's sleeping and not talking to Malachi.
00:49:14
Speaker
um And now it's Halloween. And they're out driving around in. Oh, my God. This is Jack's favorite van. It's up there. it And inside of this thing is disgusting. You know, he's scarsting once you've got a really cool. And what about ah what was what did we see him eat? A ventilates. You don't want to eat ventilates in this thing. Yeah, no. But I like I do like this paint job. It is slick as and the back bubble windows. Oh, yeah. Love back bubbles.
00:49:43
Speaker
Who doesn't? Who doesn't love a good back bubble or two? Let's get the two best back bubbles in America. Look, they're right next to each other, too. i This is where we see him driving by the loft. It's only playing two movies. So so we got a long time ago. I didn't I didn't get the movies because it was really quick. I just saw there was only two on the marquee. Rocky Horror Picture Show. Probably Rocky always five.
00:50:09
Speaker
Rocky Five Picture Show. It's the one where Rocky dances with a transgender robot. Let's do the job of dance. It's just a step to the left. A step to the right. But they're going off to just as best at for transsexual Transylvania. You would have to say that.
00:50:33
Speaker
But they're going off to to do a house quote. Yep. ah Which means they're going to shit bomb it. Oh, yeah. Which is exactly what you think it is. Yeah, shit bombs the correct term, but at least to some of my favorite dialogue coming up soon. I can't wait. I'm going to steal it from you when we get there. ah But they've done the same house the past four years, so it's like a tradition, man.
00:50:53
Speaker
And it turns out, of course, that it's Malachi's house. And you know what you don't through don't do? You don't throw shit at Malachi's house. You don't. So they have the the the dad and the brothers and everybody has it all set up now because they're going to capture one of these motherfuckers. yep And they say they're going to give them to the cops, but bullshit. You know who you don't want to be kidnapped by? A family of redheads after ship bombing their house for three fucking years. You are going to end up in a basement. You are going to be turned into a coat or maybe a parka, a skin scarf, like, oh, god Hold on, I have to yell at my slave real quick. Quiet down back there. Sorry, they might have gotten out of their restraints. They ship on my house. I was going to say someone just TPed Jack's house. Now they live in a cage. When he says TP, they actually set up a really nice Native American TP in my house. It was quite lovely. I don't know why I was so mad at them.
00:51:47
Speaker
ah But yeah, it is Kenneth's house and he does capture Patrick Dempsey. But caught me a fresh one and let him go because he's just a start. He's fucking shocked by his. Yeah, I did this. I mean, this is pretty fucking heartbreaking. Like this is some real douchebag shit. Like he does try to change them to a different house, but when they don't want to, he just he still does it.
00:52:08
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, he does say we wish I can find you a better house. Like, no, it's been three fucking years. We're graduating. We have to do like missed and hit the bushes or something. not Don't do any of it. I'm sorry. Like, I know your reputation is your biggest thing, but like, dude, this is your fucking nerdy friend that you've been friends with forever. You guys have jacked off to the same sketch of the same tits for years. Like, just just get out of the van and be like, I'm not doing this with you. You don't have to stop it or anything, but like, just don't be there.
00:52:36
Speaker
It does lead to my favorite line toward the end of the movie That's the line I think I'm going to steal from you. OK. All right. So I did did have that written down. OK. Probably my favorite line of the whole movie. I just want to imagine him fucking practice reading that in the mirror. He saw all variations of it. ah But so Patrick Dempsey is hiding his report card from his parents, which never really comes to anything. We don't find out that he's failing or anything. You do get a montage of him studying his ass off. Yeah, I'm glad we didn't. ah I'm glad we didn't, though, because it's a 98 minute movie, I think. Yeah.
00:53:07
Speaker
I felt good. I don't, I don't need more added to this, but i what it really comes to is this blow up moment where Seth Green's character has like three C's, two B's and an A and they're like, all right, good job buddy. Here's an ice cream party. I've had straight A's my entire life and you guys are giving me shit because my report card's not here.
00:53:25
Speaker
who Who was grading this baby before he was a year old? His entire life he's gotten straight A's? Oh, that's a good poopy. You get an A for poopy. That's a really good poopy. Oh, stop suckling the bitty. That's going to be an A minus. It hurt the bitty.
00:53:41
Speaker
I bet you think I killed my wife, right? ah think that That is exactly what this is. I bet you think I killed my wife moment. I bet you think I failed. Well, now I kind of do. I didn't. But I love the part where Seth Green started saying something. The dad's like, shut up. Shut up, Seth. He's like, ah the mom's like, shut up, Seth. That's Chuck. Shut up, Chuck. Look, I didn't know if his name was Chuck, Fred or William.
00:54:08
Speaker
It's Seth. I was pretty sure there was a good chance it was Beelzebub.
00:54:15
Speaker
Oh my God, Seth Green's not his real brother. They took him from Malachi's house. That's why they're friends. And it's like, you got to dye that shitty ass red hair, man. We ain't having to fucking choke the corn around here. So many redheads in this, aren't there? and like was ja like Someone take this demon, baby. Huh? What was that joke?
00:54:33
Speaker
You know what Tucson's famous for? Being really good to redheads in the summer. Like this is the town of our people. I do have a lot of redhead friends though, that's weird. You like weirdos. I do. but I like to collect people. Okay, that's a whole other podcast. Speaking of people in cages. They were shitting on her house. Well, she she is also good friends with Steven Seagal, so.
00:55:00
Speaker
He helped me design my basement. It's very feng shui. It is very. It's very nice. Well, you don't want to put ballgags. You can't have ballgags right next to the cat of nine. I mean, you're just doing it wrong. They have to be on sale. You have to have the cat tails over by the cross. I like to think of it as like when you're designing a kitchen, you need a triangle, you know, refrigerator, stove, trash can. Same thing here. Ballgag whip restraints. It's a triangle. And I am a chef.
00:55:29
Speaker
ah Cindy breaks up with her shitty college boyfriend by pouring a milkshake on his head It's just a funny scene to me. It is like he's being a piece of shit, right? Extra thick. Yeah, get me a milk chocolate. Extra thick. And she's like, excuse me? He's like, what did I fucking say? No, I'm just, I can't remember. Let me check the consistency. All over this Porsche. It's chocolate milk. It wasn't thick. He was right to be upset.
00:55:54
Speaker
But back at school. Hey, it's the summer of Tucson or sorry, it's March. into Well, yeah, it's he why it was thick. And as soon as she got there. Oh, you should have went inside, dude. It's cold in there. I've been inside of a Dairy Queen. Oh, your honor, my client is going to tell you that the fans that keep the ice cream cold were in fact making in the room hot so they can simultaneously be both.
00:56:21
Speaker
ah But this girl Iris, who hooked up with Big John earlier in the movie and Ricky in the middle of the movie. Poor. She now wants to hook up with Patrick. She's given more rides than a greyhound.
00:56:35
Speaker
Yeah, and ah I like Cindy is trying to like mend fences with Dempsey. Yeah, trying. And he's like, what? You didn't want to talk to Donald Miller for 17 years. You want to ride the Ronnie Miller Express? Do not say that ever. You're going to want to fucking talk a little bit different, buddy. ah But yeah, after that Greyhound line, at least her ticket doesn't cost me a thousand dollars. Ooh. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. Oof. You're going to have a case of drippy dong. How much does AIDS medication cost? Well, 87, it was just sleeping on piles of money. Oh, that's right.
00:57:14
Speaker
You're just asleep on all your money. We figured it out. But so we go to the New Year's party. Cindy is drinking a very strong punch, which is actually just straight vodka. Fucking vodka, man. I was looking down, writing something down and the girl's like, I haven't added the punch yet. And I was like, doesn't she mean the booze? And I looked up and I was like, nope, that is a cup of vodka. This is they don't want to spike the whole bowl. So you do get a cup of vodka and just throw a little punch on top just for color.
00:57:42
Speaker
or the punches, Bartles and James. Oh, but she's going around looking for a room to sleep in. People are banging in every room of the house, of course. And she gets to the bathroom. Apparently, that's where she decided she was going to try to sleep. And there's Patrick Dempsey. Ice cold bathtub. And I just love that this girl who is obviously like the school slut. Yeah, I didn't want to slut shaming. No, that's it's troping. You just you know, you're putting it. She's the she's a high school slut. That's the the character.
00:58:12
Speaker
But she's like, she's like, I'm not going to do that. You won't respect me. And he's like, oh, I i respect you. And she's like, OK, cool. She's like the whole time she's saying no. Like, I'm not I'm not saying that he should keep going when she says no. Doing his pain. Exactly. She's like, you're not going to respect me. Let me just get. Just get one. Like, I can't have sex with you. You won't respect me. I'll just jerk you off violently. How do you feel about me putting a finger in your butt right before you climax? I'll tell you what, I'm not going to ask. You're going to feel great about it after. okay go Oh. But.
00:58:42
Speaker
Yeah, this is where he uses her poetry and his poetry. And meanwhile, Bobby shows up to the party. He's like, of course I'm here. It's fucking New Year's, bro. Bro, trying to hang some ah bang some high school checks.
00:58:53
Speaker
it's It's New Year's. It's 40 below in Iowa right now. Yeah, I came home to Tucson. This is where Tucson shines, my friends. This is where Tucson shines. Just cool enough to wear a fancy jacket, but you're not going to die if you pass out in the bush. Pretty sure we were in the 80s this year for New Year's. Yeah, he's like 72 out, dude. yeah Well, sometimes it gets cold and you're just like, oh, cool. I get to wear this fucking really nice dress code I've been waiting on.
00:59:21
Speaker
Oh, it's my day. I didn't have any plans today, but now I'm going somewhere. I had a really nice leather jacket for years and like I get to wear it three times a year. So I finally just got rid of it. Like it's just too fucking hot. Yeah. Yeah, there's no I have three hoodies.
00:59:39
Speaker
And I'm like, cool. Well, I get to wear one each day, like one, once that one, once a year is what I'm trying to say. Oh, I suffered through it. I'm like, I know it's 72, but look at this hoodie. It's got cats on it. But they are telling Bobby about how like Ronnie Miller is cool now and he's been hooking up with all the girls and.
00:59:57
Speaker
Bobby's like, well, you're not a legend until you score the captain of the cheerleaders. And it's just like looking up. Hey, I think I hear. Is my mom calling? Did you hear that, too? I'll be right there. horn This house has a popcorn ceiling. I was like, did you know the game had belts made of nipples?
01:00:18
Speaker
Just trying to segue. Just trying to segue. But so Bobby yells at her. She gets pissed. He comes out and spills the fucking beans about the whole whole thing. Where did she get the beans?
01:00:30
Speaker
I'm the vodka. Well, you this is Big John's house. Can I interest you in a pint of vodka and a bucket of beans? Oh, the Big John special? I'll take it. Also, I know why Big John has gas because right before this, Patrick Dempsey invites them to a New Year's Day get together at his house. We're going to watch bowl games. We're going to eat salami and cheesecake. Yep.
01:00:50
Speaker
What the fuck, dude? It's like together. Oh, my. My mom makes this great salami wrapped cheesecake. You have to try it. I would. I would, too. She brulees the top of it. It's great. A brulee. By the way. Do you take your salami a little crispy? Mm. Good choice. But Big John was like, get the fuck out of my house. Iris, I don't I don't fucking know you, man. Yeah, you did a couple of minutes ago. Yeah. Nope. Wasn't me.
01:01:21
Speaker
So we get a sad montage. Even the nerds are laughing at him, which is not that sad to me. No, it's not. You're getting what you'd fucking deserve. Yeah, exactly. You shit over every you literally shit on your friend's house. So I mean, like you you ruined everything because of your reputation you care so much about. yeah Well, when the nerds are cruising down the street, he's like, look, guys, tonight's not all bad. Look at that lonely fuck. I don't even realize that it's Patrick Dempsey. So our life isn't that bad. Could be worse. it Could be that guy.
01:01:49
Speaker
And now he's like the school pariah, I mean, to an extreme, because he walks in and goes to the vending machine and everybody is within like a quarter mile radius just leaves. Much like a big, journey goes to but everybody goes to the football field. theyre like He's in the school. We'll be outside. Yeah.
01:02:06
Speaker
Cindy's like looking at him all sad, like like she feels bad for him. It doesn't say anything. And even like the punks and the nerds, which they call the mutants are blowing him off.
Comedic Exchanges and Emotional Moments
01:02:14
Speaker
But I like when the quote unquote fat girl comes up to him and she's just like, don't you know anything about economics? Could have had me for forty nine ninety five. Well, you're told is to lower your self worth to like right which and you could have gotten this for like a penny. I'd do some weird shit for clinkies, you fucking dummy. It's just ah it's a good moment because it's it's like I said, the quote fat girl and it's a movie. So that's like the bottom rung. And and every single kid, the nerds, the jocks, the the burnouts, everybody is laughing at this fucking dude. Yeah. Quote unquote fat chicks in high school with the lowest rung in the 80s. I mean, that's like, I know you fucked up. It's like getting fat, dude.
01:02:56
Speaker
No, not at all. That's why I definitely said quote unquote. Yeah. like No, no, I'm not. I'm questioning the movie. Like you could have gotten somebody bigger. Well, they're even trying because they're shooting her from like the lowest angle you possibly can. they're like exist We're going to set the camera on your feet. OK, so I want you to get this thing. It's called a cell phone and it's got a camera on the front. Just unlock it and look down at it. And that's what we're going to use for your footage here. Oh, God, is that me?
01:03:23
Speaker
I do like to when they're making fun of Patrick Dempsey's spasmobile now, because he's he's driving by the scoops and he's like hiding and shit for dangerous game. You're playing friendo. Cindy calls them all out. She's like, I remember ah quite a few girls who were having a good time in, quote unquote, spasmobile. They're all like, Oh, fuck you, bitch. Oh, like throw my past decisions in my face. I'm sorry. I didn't realize I was going to be account held accountable for my actions.
01:03:50
Speaker
But Cindy's the only one that didn't do anything with him. Yeah. who She tried. She did try. But this is the apology scene at the arcade. ah Take it away, Jack. he He walks in to say sorry and Malakai's ignoring him. And then just the most dramatic version. This kid's like the actor is having his moment and he's just like, you shit on my house. Shit on my house. You shit on my house. House man.
01:04:18
Speaker
My father! You shit on my father! The other kids in the arcade aren't even like rattled by this. I would have been turning around. So it's happened before. Malachi yells at somebody about shitting on his house at least once a month. I would have been turning around with my popcorn like, who did what now?
01:04:33
Speaker
You should have my house, man. I wanted one more walk away. I want like once he left because he's like, all right, fine. And Dempsey leaves. I want him more like him on the video game like shit in my house. I think he did. I think they had to cut that because he didn't say shit so many times. It's PG. ah He did. If I'm up against the other arcade game. Oh, yeah. I was about to kick his fucking ass. Well, he shit on his house. I should have your house. Would you throw me up against an arcade?
01:05:01
Speaker
I feel like you'd like it. I was like, I'll throw you up against an arcade. Let's go to golf and stuff. I don't know where else. I don't know where else cargades are. There's a look up how to get an arcade cabinet for the house. Step two, throw Whitney against it. Step three. Well, we already talked about how he has sex. Put on some dubstep.
01:05:23
Speaker
That would be torture for me. Really fun to hear Derek do an acapella dubstep. will pull the but but but but What's Skrillex doing in my bedroom?
01:05:38
Speaker
Dude, I would never let this go if I was Malachi. Just like a year later, like, all right, good to see you. Shit on my house. Shit on my house. Yeah, like I look, I forgive you and we're friends again. Just don't forget. You should shut my house. Hey, dude, ah I'm out of cash right now. We're going to get pizza for poker. Can you grab the pizza? I can't really do it right now. well You should on my house, dude. yeah Hey, are you making out with my girlfriend right now? You should on my house.
01:06:05
Speaker
But he does follow Cindy into the bathroom at school to try to talk to her. And I mean, I knew i've I have not seen this movie, but I was like, let's not her. But it's a happy Gilmore moment where he's like rubbing the the doors. I don't know. I'm just get so scared sometimes scared of being alone. I want to touch you all over again.
01:06:27
Speaker
Um, it's this teacher from the dance and she's like, all right, you're good. You got detention, you sicko pervert. And, uh, the IMDB trivia had the most useless thing on this part. So IMDB trivia, most useless. Yeah. It said during the scene where Patrick Dempsey accidentally talks to the teacher in the bathroom, she doesn't wash her hands when she leaves the stall.
01:06:51
Speaker
No, but she puts it all over him. Oh, OK. Well, she's a teacher. like She has bathtub gin in her classroom that she's been making for medicinal purposes. So she just dunks her hands in that white lightning. She just goes to the guy from the faculty ah whose name I can't think of right now. But Daniel Super Troopers and shit.
01:07:12
Speaker
Yeah, we yeah. Kruger from Seinfeld. She goes to him and she's like, can you just pour some coffee on my hands? I i know what your coffee is. ah You don't want hot coffee on your hands. You ain't drinking hot coffee, dude. I know you. I've seen you. Coffee. I clean the glasses. Thank you. I went to go put my cigarette in your coffee the other day and lit like a fucking river in Cleveland. It set fire above liquid.
01:07:37
Speaker
We get a cutesy moment with Seth Green. He goes to like stand up for his brother. He's like, dude, you really fucked with my my brother, man. yeah He was a nerd. And then he was cool. And now he's fucking nobody. And she just like powders him in the face. And when he walks off, he's like, oh, what? The chick said it was good for my complexion.
01:07:56
Speaker
Just we are riffing. We are letting Sev Green just riff all over this movie. yeah I mean, if he's riffing at like fucking seven or whatever he is here, he thinks it on him. and see Yeah. thirteen He might be thirteen he might be twenty one. I don't know. He's the oldest person in this movie. Yeah, he's older than the teacher with gray hair. I didn't wash your hands.
01:08:19
Speaker
She didn't live that long. But he has his ah ah what's that movie with the boombox? Say anything. Say anything. He has a say anything moment, but instead of a boombox, it's a lawnmower. And it's not romantic. By the way, that's a that's a thin line between romantic and creepy in that movie anyway. And he's like hopped up on cocaine or something. Oh, he is just in the front yard of their house at six in the morning doing handstands on this fucking lawnmower. I'm like, this is how you die. He's doing a physical Nick Cage.
01:08:49
Speaker
Yeah, I am the greatest. I am the greatest at mowing lawns. But he's like, I just want to, you know, have ah another talk with you, the real me and the real you and we did we can make up. And she's like, sure. Not at six in the fucking morning. Come back. Yeah, I told my mom that my mom was going to call the cops until I told her you had a chemical imbalance and you were seeking help. Yeah, I do love that. You're out of out of the country is my favorite.
01:09:19
Speaker
Oh, yeah, because he kept calling and he's calling as Donald. And the mom's like, she says she doesn't know any Donald. Ronald, is that you? Is that you, Ronald? Why did you call her? I forgot. I'm sorry. I forgot my name. But he does say he's he's going to come back at 11. She's like, I'll be washing my hair out of the country. country and So she's flirting back already. It's adorable. It's easy to forgive someone who's tried to ruin your life.
01:09:47
Speaker
I've done it multiple times. But how did it work out for you? Well, you fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on you. Fool me three times, shame on us. Fool me four times, back to shame on you. Fool me five times, I'll share some of the blame, 70-30. You fool me 364 times, shame on me.
01:10:07
Speaker
Yeah. Once we've lived together for a year and if you've been doing it every day, I just can't. I can't. It can only take so much. The problem is like I'm just into emotional BDSM. I find these just awful chicks and just see what they're doing later. Emotionally ball gag me. Oh man, she's emotionally got a strap on.
01:10:31
Speaker
Let's get an emotional pegging.
01:10:35
Speaker
Oh, been there. But so there's this scene where Malakai is helping Patty with her homework and Big John or no, Quintan is like Quintan.
Confrontations and Resolution
01:10:46
Speaker
Booker's trying to pull a ah fucking Ronnie Miller on her. Yep. And whatever. They've already got a name for what it's called. It's not that hard. It's a Ronnie Miller, dude. He's pulling Ronnie Mill.
01:10:58
Speaker
So he goes over to confront him. Patrick Dempsey comes over with a baseball bat. And I just love to do there. They're like getting each other's faces about to be a fight. And the older teacher is about to go break it up. But this science teacher who is still in his lab coat at lunch break, by the way, she's always in his lab. I love it. Sorry, i his science jacket.
01:11:19
Speaker
Every time you eat this cafeteria, it's an experiment, so. But he just holds her back. He's like, no, I want to see what happens. Yeah, he's got a bat at one of our star fucking basketball or football and baseball players. Let's let's see how it plays out because football is over now. This is what he was saying. He was he was football earlier, too. Like, so he's a stud on two sports that we know of. Yeah, this school would be fucking over there beating the crap out of little Ronnie. But he doesn't have a letterman's jacket. He is leather bomber.
01:11:47
Speaker
Because it it just it's too bulky. He wants to show some chest and some abs. He's classy. That leather bomber is edgy. Well, it makes him look older and more sophisticated because that's his thing now. How do you think he buys one? He's got to be 21. He's got a bomber jacket.
01:12:04
Speaker
kind I fought in the war. I'm sorry. McDreamy slams the bat on that deck on that table. I'm just. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, he says the right thing. look He says the right thing. He's he knows he's going to get his ass beaten to five. He's like, I'll fucking break your pitching arm at least like I'm taking something out with me. It might be your career. But does lead to the story when we were seven years old and we were all hanging out because we were all fucking friends and you broke your arm. Yeah. You cried the whole fucking way. Yeah. I just shit on my house. so And I mean, it's a good point. And it's kind of the thing that always bothers me in high school movies of like the groups, because like, you know, a bunch of these people were friends when they were younger. He's like, now you're going to fucking beat him up because he's sitting on your side of the cafeteria. Like, what the fuck is your problem? By the way, it's not a cafeteria. It's outside. Yeah. Yeah.
01:12:51
Speaker
yeah I also I read a little thing. So this movie was shot non-union. So so SAG basically went to like all these Tucson high students who are playing extras and was like they were advising against doing this because if you do non-union work, it's you can't which does this doesn't make any sense. But if you do non-union work, then it'll be harder for you to get into like if you want to be an actor. OK. But you also have to have X number of hours to be in the union. So you do the math.
01:13:22
Speaker
But apparently the drama department, like all the kids decided not to participate. Oh, really? Because they didn't want to do non-union work and fuck up their potential future careers that they didn't. Anybody just wanted to see themselves on camera later, like, oh, that was pretty.
01:13:36
Speaker
Well, all these other kids are like, I don't want to be an actor. I don't give a shit. Yeah. Mm hmm. I just get to be in a movie. Look, you get to go to the pizza party if you're an extra. So I love pizza. I love make my slice extra thin. Dempsey has this thing like, you know, he's just trying to make friends by being himself. And that's the hardest thing to do is just be yourself, man. Yeah, I fucked up. And then Keenan Ivory Wayans walks in and he goes, message.
01:14:02
Speaker
i
01:14:05
Speaker
And Big John starts the slow clap. Mm hmm. Your dog does not like a slow clap. Now, someone rang the doorbell. Oh, idiots. We go back. It's Patrick Dempsey. He's doing his job again. He's mowing lawns. He's got a sexy black Stetson on. I don't know if that's the right word, but what you know what, though? I like it because now he's finding his own style. He's like, look, I'm going to be the first cowboy in Tucson. And now we know it's May because he's dripping in sweat.
01:14:33
Speaker
Yeah, or March or or February or some years in October. Just Christmas Day, Christmas Day, do what was like 80 degrees this Christmas is ridiculous. I'm over there fucking sweating in my goddamn Santa Claus jacket. Like I was definitely dreaming of a white Christmas. That was the best I was getting. I was going to say that just means I'm dreaming of a white.
01:15:02
Speaker
Oh, Christmas, whoo. But Cindy comes out, she pays him, she goes off with her friends. They all acknowledge him now. They're like, hey, Ronnie. So like everybody's forgiven him. Well, and he gave his big speech and, yeah you know, then he admitted all his faults. The whole school, he didn't admit to shitting on that dude's house. The whole school is now equals, though. There are no more clicks. Yep. Yeah, just the power kind of what we get. So but then they come back and Cindy jumps out of the car and her friends like, go for it, Cindy.
01:15:32
Speaker
and they ride off into the sunset on a riding mower. yep ah You're getting pulled over like five houses down. This is kind of a rich neighborhood. They have a really quick response. And yeah, can't buy me some more fucking Beatles shit.
01:15:47
Speaker
know
01:15:50
Speaker
I think we need to have meant to sitting on the house. He said it when they got in the fight. Not everybody in school. day You guys look, he's trying to be himself. And yes, I should on his house. Also, yeah he just back there. He's like, you should have my house. OK, yeah, I know I should in your house. I'm going to work that into the fucking speech. Why are you guys going to bring that up? I should on his house. He's not going to let that go.
01:16:15
Speaker
So I think we should have on hiss house that shit in a bag and threw it. I just want to know where that is. Was that human shit? Was that? No, they they specify. He's like, is that human feces? And Ricky's like, no, it's dog shit. Yeah, I figured I figured Big John's shit in a bag. yeah Big John told me that he's like, this is a collected this from my dog. Why do you have to go? look I got a squeaker coming. Oh, it's not a squeaker. Get the bag. Get the bag.
01:16:39
Speaker
Individual bags. It comes out like giant rabbit turds. Actually, I know exactly where they got this bag of shit. Mm hmm. It's the same place that ah Charlie Sheen and Emilio Estevez got their shit. Oh, you know, we're going to start selling it in the snack size. We got pig shit, dog shit, human shacks, jokes on you. It's all pig shit. Look at this. This is a fun sized bag in case you want to throw it at the house of the children of the corn. Don't recommend it. Oh, them gingers are terrified. They're going to get you and feed you to the pig shit.
01:17:09
Speaker
Speaking of pig shit ah There's a ah really gorgeous girl at one point in this movie me. Well, yeah, but you're not in this movie Who's talking to somebody and I looked her up in the credits cuz I was like, well she's she's beautiful She's gotta have done other work, right? The other biggest credit she had was in Beverly Hills Cop 3 Where she plays ah Prescott pig I tell you about Barb. No, it wasn't Barb. It's one of the other girls just hanging out there. I might. No, it wasn't Iris. It was somebody else. OK. But Prescott Pig is one of the big mascots mascots from the the theme park. So she's a gorgeous girl, gorgeous you know woman in a fat pig costume. Wow. So let's have Derek start recommendations as he's the wild card here.
01:17:56
Speaker
um I'll give it a I'll give it a recommendation if you like grew up watching 80s like teen comedies Okay, because I don't know if it would work for younger people now because like they wouldn't enjoy a lot of the 80s comedies I think the beginning is pretty slow and I think the end once he's like ostracized I was sitting there for a while. I was like, dude, this has got I I looked at the time I was on my phone. I was like, there are still like 12 minutes left. And you know, the makeup's only like two minutes. That's how it works in these movies. I was going to watch another 10 minutes of this kid being sad. Like, but the middle part is very funny. Patrick Dempsey being a douchebag is very funny. Shitting on people's houses is very funny. Mm hmm. And seeing unless it's your house, seeing Big John without a hole in his head is was pretty good. All right, Jack, I'm going to let you go next.
01:18:46
Speaker
I do recommend it. um i guess I guess Derek kind of did nail it. like ah There's going to be a group of people that aren't going to be a fan of this because you didn't grow up with it, but I don't need the caveats of watching it with people, but I will i will watch this in my life again with Whitney.
01:19:02
Speaker
because it's or and and people that have seen it before. So you don't need to drink to it. You don't need to smoke to it, but you can. And maybe you should. You always can. You always can. um Obviously, full recommend for me. I freaking love this movie. It's still kept for me. I even I don't know. I just I will always have people watch this movie. Well, with this one, I was like, I was like, you guys, we need one more movie for Made in Arizona month when he's like, can't buy me love.
01:19:29
Speaker
And I was like, well, we we already have a Patreon and I know that you want it on Patreon. She's like, can't buy me love. Can't buy me love. All right. Well, just can't buy me love. It's a bad movie. It is. I mean, I mean, it's it's not a John Hughes movie, especially if you know. Well, that's not it. That is actually a glowing recommendation that it's not a John Hughes movie. Before we before we jump off, do you have box office numbers for it? Because it might it might be a bad movie by numerical standards.
01:19:58
Speaker
I wasn't I didn't I can't believe I made this episode longer. I have to pee so bad right now. All right, I don't have Okay, I don't have a budget. I can't find a budget, but I do have box office numbers so And gross and and us like worldwide and us say the same thing on IMDB is I know the budget Oh, you got it. The budget is 1.8 million. I Oh, OK. All right. Not too shabby. OK, you guys go for the guests. So it made 11 million. I saw the number, so I can't say it. Oh, did you? Yeah. All right. It's not what I would have guessed. Twenty three. Twenty three. Thirty one point six million. Oh, on a million dollar budget on one point eight. So I mean, it made 30 million dollars. That's pretty good for 1987.
01:20:53
Speaker
Yeah, it'd be terrible now. You know why it costs 1.8 million? Non-union. Non-union. Oh, yeah. when filled the two when you're When you're done being an extra, go ahead and pick up that camera and follow us to location B.
01:21:08
Speaker
and like Patrick Dempsey made it work for himself and some of these other guys did, but that might be part of the reason we've got two actresses that quit, you know, six years later. Yeah. And they were having trouble finding work. I mean, I'm not surprised to find out that a girl from Friday the 13th, part seven was doing non-union work or part six tracks and vice academy. So. um But yeah, so that's it for this week. Next week we will be covering it's my my turn to choose my random weird ass weird shit movie that everybody gets to watch. ah It's going to be a movie called Death Magic. It was filmed entirely in Tucson to a shot on video. Little cheap movie. But it's a hoot and it's about a civil war general who whose ghost comes back from the dead and starts killing the descendants of his
01:22:03
Speaker
Murderers. I do declare um I'm gonna get vengeance on them. They're murderers of my family and my bloodline. The south will rise again, but it's gonna be slow and stiff cuz we are old and our joints are quite achy. But I guarantee you the south will rise again. oh Look, it's rising in my pants right now. and it stuff Looks like my south is rising. Is this ah we have to be together?
01:22:26
Speaker
Well, yeah, I don't know if it's available streaming, so I try not to do these too often, but it's one of the ones I bought specifically for this. What's it called? It turned out death magic. Not that I'm not going to watch it with you, but I just want to see if we can if it is something streaming death magic dance. Oh, and I didn't mention either. It's too late now, but this is not streaming for free anywhere right now, but you can rent it on Amazon and Apple. And it's like three bucks. Death magic is on nothing. You can't even spend money on that.
01:22:55
Speaker
I was like, if it's anywhere, it's like a tooby. Yeah, you might be able to YouTube it, I guess. But oh, probably. But ah it also is definitely like a satanic panic 80s type of movie. where Like there's a lot. And there's there's a lot of boobs and boobs. So that's that'll be a fun one. I enjoy that movie. um You will be. You can buy it. I'll have all that stuff available for you. You can buy it on physical media like I did. But And of course, we have to mention our Patreon Patreon dot com slash worst people three dollars a month. This month's episode is a listener request. Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man with Mickey Rourke and Don Johnson. Take your time. Also a first time viewing for me and also awesome.
01:23:38
Speaker
A delight. it was I was pleasantly surprised because it was my first time and I love me some young Mickey, younger Mickey. Younger. i have you I have three first time watches this month. Wow. It's Firebirds also. Yeah. Wow. What a good day or month for you.
01:23:56
Speaker
Oh, I need to mention um on Firebirds, my friend Dustin, is he's my Black Hawk friend. He flies Black Hawks. You've got to be careful with that. You you remember our Harley Davidson episode. This show has made this joke many times. But he's got some pointers, so I told him when we released that, I'll send it to him so he can Yeah, I have him comment on something or email us because I mean, it's there's probably not three people less qualified to talk about helicopters than and these three people right the here. But we do it anyway. like I've seen a lot of movies with helicopters. I think I'm pretty qualified. I played a doctor on stage one. So by the time this airs, we'll have already heard back from him. But yeah, OK. Throw that out there.
01:24:42
Speaker
And on Hahn Took Shots First, go check that out. Hahn Took Shots First pod dot com and anywhere you get podcasts. um We just got done talking about Rogue One and our next episode will be the one of the reasons we fucking started the whole thing. We're finally there almost a year later. We get to talk about episode four, A New Hope, or as the classy alcoholic only calls it Star Wars.
01:25:06
Speaker
I don't think I'll be on that one, guys. I'm so excited. We might have a guest. We've discussed something. Yeah, we have we have we have a thought and process. so ah guys we have ah We have a friend who has who just saw Star Wars for the first time ever.
01:25:20
Speaker
Yeah, like a year ago, finally, because every time a joke or a reference was made to Star Wars, he would just skirt. We're talking about Tyler, by the way, Ty from Swigfoot. It's just anytime someone made a reference about Star Wars, she's like, oh, hum the right song. Why are you humming that? The John Williams inspired hum. But we'll see if he wants to be on. Awesome. If not, me and Derek will talk for five hours.
01:25:44
Speaker
I'll be sitting right there watching you guys. its So, of course, we have to thank Evasion for our opening and closing music. I've been Derek. I'm Whitney. I'm Jack. Chilled in the corn. You shit on my house, man.