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Scrote Decode: John Cena & His Insane 75 Page Girlfriend Contract
22 Plays4 years ago
WWE Superfan Savannah chronicles the dating and marriage history of Wrestling Superstar, John Cena, and details the lessons FDSers can take from the breakdown of his relationships with his first wife and former fiance, Nikki Bella, featuring insane 75 page contracts.
Story about LVM suddenly getting married:
https://www.instagram.com/p/CWTEv_LBF-G/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link
Marshawn Lynch - "I'm just here so I won't get fined".
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmABbHSOTqQ
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Transcript
Introduction and Patreon Invitation
00:00:00
Speaker
Hey, Queens.
00:00:01
Speaker
Are you ready to level up?
00:00:02
Speaker
Then join our Patreon at patreon.com forward slash the female dating strategy where you can find weekly bonus content and FDS commentary on all the latest pop culture relationship and dating news.
00:00:16
Speaker
If you just want to listen to the extra bonus content, we have the Lurker Mode tier on our Patreon.
00:00:20
Speaker
If you want merchandise, back
00:00:22
Speaker
So if you'd like access to all this and more, visit our Patreon at patreon.com forward slash the female dating strategy.
Meet the Hosts: Ro, Savannah, and Lilith
00:00:57
Speaker
What's up, queens?
00:00:58
Speaker
Welcome to the Female Dating Strategy Podcast, the meanest female-only podcast on the internet.
00:01:03
Speaker
I'm Ro.
00:01:04
Speaker
And this is Savannah.
00:01:05
Speaker
And I'm
WWE Fandom and European Wrestling Scene
00:01:06
Speaker
Lilith.
00:01:06
Speaker
And today we have a case study, a WWE-themed case study, because as you all know, I was a WWE fan for a very, very long time, about 10 years.
00:01:19
Speaker
I'm still reeling from that information, by the way.
00:01:24
Speaker
it's great like WWE was great I always thought of something that only Americans would like I felt like you know the idea of British people liking it is weird to me for some reason it's massive because they they used to tour like twice a year I actually got like front like my sister got me front row seats for my 16th birthday um and it was really really the atmosphere was amazing my sister doesn't
00:01:47
Speaker
but she's not into wrestling but even she had a really good time like when you're actually there and you see them the atmosphere was just totally electric like i would go again to another live show if i could even though i've not watched it in years nice yeah i had no idea it was at all popular abroad much less in in europe no it's massive in europe so like so now we can tell all the yuppie people that look down on wwe as being for rednecks like it's big in europe
00:02:19
Speaker
It's not, it's massive.
00:02:21
Speaker
And they've really expanded, especially since they went like PG.
00:02:25
Speaker
So they started to appeal to children more.
00:02:27
Speaker
They've really, really expanded their market.
00:02:29
Speaker
So they're also in Asia a lot as well, the Middle East.
00:02:33
Speaker
So they've done pretty well for themselves as an organisation.
Focus on John Cena: Career and Personal Life
00:02:35
Speaker
Yeah.
00:02:37
Speaker
But this episode will look at one of the, if not the biggest franchise player, I would say, in WWE.
00:02:45
Speaker
And that is John Cena.
00:02:47
Speaker
So for those who aren't familiar with WWE, John Cena is a wrestler turned actor now.
00:02:54
Speaker
He's been in quite a few big films in Hollywood recently, like Fast 9.
00:03:02
Speaker
And he started off in the WWE.
00:03:05
Speaker
I'd say he was even bigger than The Rock when he was in WWE.
00:03:09
Speaker
Cena was massive.
00:03:10
Speaker
But anyway, this won't focus on his career, but his personal
Does Success Equal High-Value Behavior in Relationships?
00:03:15
Speaker
life.
00:03:15
Speaker
It shows a number of things.
00:03:17
Speaker
The first and most important thing, I think, is that it shows that just because a man is wealthy, successful, he's got money, that doesn't necessarily mean that he won't be low value towards you and that he won't waste your time in relationships.
00:03:32
Speaker
Right.
00:03:34
Speaker
The second one is it also shows why it's not a good idea to be a forever girlfriend slash a Barb the Builder, as we like to say.
00:03:43
Speaker
I understand that there are people who follow FDS who may not be interested in marriage.
00:03:50
Speaker
And that's absolutely fine.
00:03:51
Speaker
I don't think marriage is for everyone.
00:03:53
Speaker
If you don't want to get married and that's something that you want...
00:03:58
Speaker
then that's absolutely fine.
00:03:59
Speaker
But when it isn't fine is if you're staying with a guy who told you that he doesn't want to get married to you, but you want to get married to him.
00:04:07
Speaker
That's where the forever girlfriend can become really, really bad news for you.
00:04:11
Speaker
As we'll find out during this case study.
John Cena's Early Struggles and Support from First Wife
00:04:15
Speaker
Sina was married to his first wife called Liz.
00:04:21
Speaker
They were on and off for almost 20 years, according to him.
00:04:25
Speaker
And Cena would often say in interviews that Liz was there for him when he moved to California from Massachusetts to try and build a career for himself as a bodybuilder and a wrestler.
00:04:38
Speaker
And she was sleeping in the car with him.
00:04:40
Speaker
She supported him.
00:04:41
Speaker
She was around when he wasn't getting any work, when he was broke, when he was homeless and all that jazz.
00:04:48
Speaker
That seems to be the backstory of a lot of wrestlers, that they just start out broke.
00:04:52
Speaker
It must be really hard to break into.
00:04:53
Speaker
But they start out homeless.
00:04:55
Speaker
Yeah.
00:04:55
Speaker
It's a really, really tough industry to break into.
00:04:58
Speaker
You really need to be in the right place at the right time with the right skill set, with the right looks.
00:05:04
Speaker
So being successful in the wrestling world, it hinges on a lot of variables that may be out of your control.
00:05:11
Speaker
Like I think even in Sina's case,
00:05:13
Speaker
He sort of came across it by accident.
00:05:15
Speaker
He said that he was in the gym one day and a friend said, oh, I train at this wrestling gym.
00:05:20
Speaker
Why don't you come down?
00:05:22
Speaker
And that was how it started for him.
00:05:24
Speaker
It was just a conversation.
00:05:25
Speaker
Yeah, you just have to also be extremely marketable as well if you want to do well.
00:05:30
Speaker
And that's not an easy thing to do.
00:05:32
Speaker
Yeah, you have to have immediate charisma, right?
00:05:35
Speaker
Because that's the entire draw of the sport is that the athletes are kind of... Hilarious?
00:05:40
Speaker
Just a little unhinged.
00:05:41
Speaker
Yeah, funny, but like also, you know, can command a crowd.
00:05:44
Speaker
You know, it's not the same as other sports where it's more about their individual performance.
00:05:49
Speaker
Like the theatrics is part of what makes WWE compelling TV.
00:05:53
Speaker
Yes, exactly.
00:05:55
Speaker
It's basically reality TV for men.
00:05:58
Speaker
So it's not like hockey because have you ever seen a hockey player do an interview?
00:06:01
Speaker
It's like, yeah, we were just doing a team player.
00:06:04
Speaker
I hit my head on the ice and then they're like, no charisma.
00:06:10
Speaker
Shut up.
00:06:11
Speaker
You big dumb himbo.
00:06:12
Speaker
You're hot, but shut up.
00:06:14
Speaker
There was a really famous NFL player named Marshawn Lynch who used to literally show up to press conferences and be like, I'm just here so I won't get fined because he just didn't want to answer questions.
00:06:25
Speaker
He was just like, I'm just here so I won't get fined.
00:06:27
Speaker
And like it became like a whole meme.
00:06:28
Speaker
But at least he was honest.
00:06:30
Speaker
At least he was honest.
00:06:31
Speaker
Exactly.
00:06:31
Speaker
A topmost honesty.
00:06:34
Speaker
So back to Sina and Liz's relationship.
00:06:37
Speaker
So they were married.
Controversial Divorce and Prenup Issues
00:06:39
Speaker
They finally got married in 2009 and they were married for about three years until Sina filed for divorce.
00:06:46
Speaker
It's not entirely known why the marriage broke down so quickly, especially...
00:06:51
Speaker
Since they'd been together for so long prior to that.
00:06:55
Speaker
But, I mean, Cena's a very private person, but he's alluded to the fact that he was on the road a lot of the times, like, you know, wrestlers, they travel like 360 days a year.
00:07:05
Speaker
They're often not home.
00:07:09
Speaker
And I think they were remodelling their home as well.
00:07:11
Speaker
And that caused that major, major argument.
00:07:14
Speaker
So they filed for divorce.
00:07:16
Speaker
And during, after Sina had filed for divorce, it came out that Liz had signed a prenup 16 days before the wedding.
00:07:25
Speaker
No!
00:07:27
Speaker
That supposedly included a clause that allowed Sina to take back any gifts he had given her as well.
00:07:34
Speaker
So it was a very, very crippling prenup.
00:07:36
Speaker
No.
00:07:38
Speaker
Oh, my God.
00:07:39
Speaker
When he was broken, had nothing?
00:07:41
Speaker
Yeah.
00:07:42
Speaker
So I don't.
00:07:43
Speaker
So this is a bit of a hot mess.
00:07:44
Speaker
I mean, for me, firstly, an on and off relationship should really stay off.
00:07:50
Speaker
Yeah.
00:07:51
Speaker
Wait, so what's the timeline?
00:07:53
Speaker
Did they get married before he got famous or after?
00:07:57
Speaker
No, after.
00:07:58
Speaker
So when they got married in 2009, this was when his career was really starting to take off, like really, really taking off.
00:08:06
Speaker
They were sleeping in the car when he had first started out.
00:08:09
Speaker
So he had nothing.
00:08:10
Speaker
He was in his early 20s.
00:08:12
Speaker
So it seems like this woman dedicated a lot of her time, energy,
00:08:17
Speaker
towards supporting this guy in more ways than one and Cena even acknowledged that as well.
00:08:23
Speaker
He was literally homeless and broke.
00:08:26
Speaker
But now I'm not going to say that people should remain together if they're not happy, but the fact that he made her sign such a one-sided prenup is deeply problematic.
00:08:37
Speaker
Yeah, that's fucking selfish.
00:08:39
Speaker
Yeah, especially when she spent so much time supporting him without any type of guarantee it was ever going to pay off.
00:08:46
Speaker
If you are going to do Bob the Builder for a guy, like, make sure that you're married to them.
00:08:51
Speaker
If we look at people like Jeff, like Bezos and Bill Gates, the reason why their wives got a nice payday or Melinda Gates is in line for a nice payday is that they were married at the time.
00:09:03
Speaker
At the time.
00:09:03
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:05
Speaker
If they weren't married, they would probably be left with nothing.
00:09:09
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:10
Speaker
Well, Mackenzie married Jeff before Amazon was even started, whereas Melinda married Bill after Microsoft started.
00:09:18
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:19
Speaker
So but.
00:09:19
Speaker
But it's still like they've been married for a very long time.
00:09:21
Speaker
They have combined assets.
00:09:22
Speaker
They have combined foundations.
00:09:24
Speaker
Mackenzie Bezos was actually actively involved in building the structure of the business from the ground up, securing contracts, like all of the things that a person who was part of the startup team would do.
00:09:34
Speaker
So her payout was more than warranted because she was essentially his 50, not even essentially, she was his 50% partner.
00:09:40
Speaker
And especially if you're married, let's say Amazon went completely bust, like that's combined joint risk when you're married, right?
00:09:47
Speaker
So your finances are combined.
00:09:50
Speaker
So for all intents and purposes, like, yes, she was, she's also a co-founder of Amazon, even though once Amazon became a formal company, Jeff Bezos was like the actual CEO, et cetera.
00:10:00
Speaker
But yeah, the point being that these women were married to the men that they worked really hard for.
00:10:07
Speaker
And unfortunately for Liz, she wasn't.
00:10:10
Speaker
So what gifts did she have to return to him?
00:10:13
Speaker
It didn't say, but it's just it just had.
00:10:15
Speaker
I'm not even sure how that was even legal, because how is that
The Role of Prenups in Vetting Partners
00:10:19
Speaker
fair?
00:10:19
Speaker
Like if you give someone a gift, it's you shouldn't expect it back.
00:10:24
Speaker
Right.
00:10:25
Speaker
Yeah.
00:10:25
Speaker
The thing about prenups is they can write whatever they want, but not all of that stuff is legally binding.
00:10:31
Speaker
Yeah.
00:10:32
Speaker
And depending on what state you're in, it could be completely irrelevant.
00:10:35
Speaker
Like there are certain structural issues.
00:10:37
Speaker
aspects to the law that prevent certain aspects of prenups being signed into or being like honored during divorce proceedings.
00:10:45
Speaker
So it's really, really complicated.
00:10:47
Speaker
And I don't know enough about it to speak definitively.
00:10:49
Speaker
But yeah, it's highly possible that that technically isn't.
00:10:54
Speaker
actually legal.
00:10:55
Speaker
But even if it isn't legal, it's still deeply problematic that he'd put that in in the first place.
00:11:02
Speaker
It's a dick move.
00:11:03
Speaker
Yeah, it's a dick move.
00:11:03
Speaker
Like, that was a red flag.
00:11:05
Speaker
It's a massive red flag.
00:11:06
Speaker
And also, it's 16 days before the wedding, which makes me think, well, you know, was it...
00:11:11
Speaker
I just think if you're going to do something like a prenup, it needs to be... Like, firstly, you need your own independent legal advice.
00:11:18
Speaker
And you need to make sure that it's fair to you as well.
00:11:21
Speaker
Like... Did she not have a lawyer?
00:11:23
Speaker
Like, he waited to the last minute on purpose.
00:11:25
Speaker
Because she eventually got the same, like, lawyer that took Hulk Hogan, who was another, like, WWE superstar, that took Hulk Hogan to the cleaners after his divorce.
00:11:34
Speaker
So I would imagine that prenup was quite ironclad if she's going to get such a lawyer.
00:11:39
Speaker
But...
00:11:40
Speaker
And I know prenups are spoken about a lot on the subreddit and I'm not entirely against them, but it should also be seen as another vetting strategy as well.
00:11:50
Speaker
If a guy is clearly expecting you to sign a very, very one-sided prenup, you need to re-evaluate if this is somebody you should be marrying.
00:11:58
Speaker
Yeah.
00:11:58
Speaker
Because a high value man, even if you divorce...
00:12:02
Speaker
that he shouldn't want to see you homeless or not getting your fair share, especially if you helped him and you've raised kids.
00:12:11
Speaker
He shouldn't want to see you destitute.
00:12:13
Speaker
Yeah, the sort of man who wants you to be destitute if you get divorced...
00:12:18
Speaker
is a red fucking flag.
00:12:20
Speaker
And I know some marriage, and I know some marriages like this, where like the, I, for the men, like the idea of leaving their wife destitute, if she ever leaves him is like the whole draw, like they use it as a control thing.
00:12:31
Speaker
And so, yeah, it's a big fucking red flag.
00:12:34
Speaker
If a guy is making you sign a prenup like that.
00:12:36
Speaker
Yeah, they're definitely trying to control you.
00:12:38
Speaker
And then furthermore, if you're involved in actually supporting his career, you're just doing a bunch of unpaid labor that you're not being compensated for, right?
00:12:47
Speaker
So it's like a double insult because essentially this person just used you for a come up, didn't actually compensate you for any of that work, expected that to be part of your relationship.
00:12:56
Speaker
But once you are talking about like, hey, can I share in some of the success that I actually helped invest in you, then suddenly they are hemming and hawing and thinking you don't deserve it, right?
00:13:06
Speaker
And you see, I mean, you've seen stuff like this with like family businesses as well, right?
00:13:10
Speaker
A lot of the times the wife will do all the back office work.
00:13:13
Speaker
She essentially is an unpaid employee and then once does like a lot of stuff that would probably be too expensive if they hired out actual help to get businesses off the ground.
00:13:24
Speaker
And then when they get divorced, the guy wants to act like, oh, she never did anything, right?
00:13:28
Speaker
I'm like, no, she's an early investor and your sole employee, right?
00:13:32
Speaker
Like it's very cheap labor.
00:13:35
Speaker
Just watch when guys do this because they act like women don't deserve alimony or that like they're all leeches and that that man's success is his own.
00:13:41
Speaker
And that's just not true.
00:13:42
Speaker
It's not true at all.
00:13:44
Speaker
It's just not true.
00:13:45
Speaker
It's just fundamentally not true.
00:13:46
Speaker
And that's why they use women's labor in that regard because they couldn't get their butt.
00:13:50
Speaker
Like it's much harder.
00:13:51
Speaker
In some respects, it's much easier to exploit your girlfriend or your wife than it is to try to exploit like one of your buddies and tell them to work for free forever.
00:13:59
Speaker
Right.
00:13:59
Speaker
And then be like, oh, when if you become successful, be like, oh, this is me.
00:14:02
Speaker
This is my company.
00:14:03
Speaker
Because that guy's going to demand like...
00:14:06
Speaker
equity and ownership, right?
00:14:07
Speaker
Yeah.
00:14:08
Speaker
And when you're married, you already kind of inherently have that.
00:14:10
Speaker
So that's the thought behind it.
00:14:12
Speaker
And don't let men like make it seem like every woman involved in this is just a freeloader because that's just not true.
00:14:17
Speaker
Yeah.
00:14:17
Speaker
Also, I think a lot of women do this because they assume that men are ethical participants just like they are.
00:14:23
Speaker
And so they think, oh, if I help my man support his business, if I support him, if I do this, he'll see what I've done and he'll recognize all the work I've put in and he'll really respect and love me for it.
00:14:34
Speaker
And famous last words.
00:14:36
Speaker
Right?
00:14:36
Speaker
Like all the women think that, oh, if I invest in him when he's not famous, then he'll, I'll get my payoff later.
00:14:42
Speaker
Or he'll like, he'll show me some reciprocity later.
00:14:45
Speaker
No.
00:14:45
Speaker
And that's why FDS, we demand investment upfront because we don't believe this bullshit that like, oh, if you just slave away for a man, then maybe one day he'll give you a payoff.
00:14:54
Speaker
Like understand that men will happily take your labor and your attention and your devotion for years.
00:15:01
Speaker
And then when they make it and become famous, they will dump you like a hot potato for another woman.
00:15:05
Speaker
There's a term for it.
00:15:06
Speaker
It's called starter wife.
00:15:08
Speaker
Exactly.
00:15:09
Speaker
So understand that men are not ethical participants.
00:15:12
Speaker
It's so wild to me.
00:15:12
Speaker
They'll hang out with their buddies from high school, but their wife will be the first person they dump.
00:15:16
Speaker
Yeah.
00:15:17
Speaker
Yeah.
00:15:17
Speaker
It's really messed up because they can't wait to put their homies on and be like, oh, I'm going to share the wealth of the community.
00:15:22
Speaker
But like the woman that literally is birthing and raising their kids, she's the first person to get jettisoned.
00:15:27
Speaker
And the saddest thing is, it's sort of a double whammy for the women.
00:15:30
Speaker
I mean, this didn't happen in, like, Cena's case, as far as I know.
00:15:34
Speaker
But when the woman is busy building the man, she's also neglecting her own, like, dreams and aspirations as well.
00:15:41
Speaker
Like, there was a thread on, like, Reddit...
00:15:44
Speaker
I think that I came across and it was saying like so many women were saying, oh, I dropped out of law school to be with my husband.
00:15:50
Speaker
I didn't go to medical school to be with my partner.
00:15:53
Speaker
Like they, like women, they, they sacrifice a lot more than just their labor.
00:15:58
Speaker
They also sacrifice their own ability to have a career.
00:16:03
Speaker
It's the opportunity cost.
00:16:04
Speaker
Yep.
00:16:05
Speaker
The opportunity cost.
00:16:06
Speaker
And this is why women end up in poverty, in divorce, because if you spent years and years investing in this person to the point where you've neglected your own dreams, if that relationship ends, you don't really have a lot to go back on.
00:16:24
Speaker
And it's just really, really sad that women are set up in this way.
00:16:29
Speaker
Yeah.
00:16:29
Speaker
That's why I think men deserve to be rinsed.
00:16:31
Speaker
So ladies always put yourself in a situation where you can easily rinse the man.
00:16:38
Speaker
Like even if you're in love now and things are great now, keep in mind, like that love could change it to hate at any point in the future.
00:16:44
Speaker
You never know.
00:16:45
Speaker
Right.
00:16:45
Speaker
So even when you're in love and things are going, in fact, when you're in love, that's the best time to make sure that you're in a advantageous situation.
00:16:53
Speaker
Right.
00:16:53
Speaker
That's when you have the strongest negotiating power.
00:16:56
Speaker
Make zero financial and time investments in men, especially in their businesses, unless you are married.
00:17:02
Speaker
Don't skip college for men because that's one of those things that... No, I'm serious because that is something that gets considered when you have to go and split assets and ask for alimony.
00:17:11
Speaker
It's like, what kinds of opportunity costs were...
00:17:16
Speaker
foregone by the woman to support the man's career because you're essentially a singular unit in the eyes of the law, right?
00:17:22
Speaker
So those are the kinds of things that actually would really behoove you to keep track of so that if things go bad,
00:17:29
Speaker
you have some kind of recourse to be like, okay, I'm entitled to this much money because this is the amount that I would have been investing here had I not invested in you.
00:17:37
Speaker
Yeah.
00:17:38
Speaker
And I think we need to have more of these cautionary tales for men where women rinse the man, because I think if men, uh, if men realize like, oh shit, like she's going to come after me financially, like maybe I should not fucking be a piece of shit.
00:17:50
Speaker
Like, I don't know.
00:17:51
Speaker
They will.
00:17:52
Speaker
They'll just be sneakier about it.
00:17:53
Speaker
But that's the thing.
00:17:54
Speaker
Women need to get smarter about this shit.
00:17:56
Speaker
That's why I'm almost a little bit scared sometimes to publish these episodes, because then you just realize there's guys that are going to listen to this and then be like, I'm going to hide all my assets in some tax sheltered place where she can't access it and then never tell any woman about it and just really hose women down.
00:18:11
Speaker
But that's why we require men to be upfront with their investment.
00:18:14
Speaker
If they're being miserly, then we don't date them.
00:18:17
Speaker
Exactly.
00:18:18
Speaker
Exactly.
00:18:18
Speaker
So,
Cena and Nikki Bella: Marriage, Kids, and Vasectomy
00:18:19
Speaker
yep.
00:18:19
Speaker
That was the first part of this debacle.
00:18:22
Speaker
So moving on to part two, and this is Sina's relationship with Nikki Bella.
00:18:29
Speaker
He started to date Nikki in around July 2012, like literally...
00:18:36
Speaker
It must have been a matter of weeks after his divorce was finalised, which is a big, is a huge red flag.
00:18:43
Speaker
Absolutely massive red flag.
00:18:45
Speaker
Do you think he cheated on his first wife with Nikki?
00:18:48
Speaker
I mean, she did allege that he cheated.
00:18:50
Speaker
I don't know if anything came out of the allegation.
00:18:53
Speaker
I mean, it's probably true.
00:18:55
Speaker
If they were dating, I mean, if they started dating right away after they got divorced.
00:19:00
Speaker
It is actually known that wrestlers do cheat a lot because they're just away from home all the time.
00:19:05
Speaker
Not that it makes it okay, but they have groupies, they have fans, they're on the road all the time.
00:19:12
Speaker
So cheating is, even Vince McMahon, the owner of the organization, he cheated on his wife, Linda.
00:19:20
Speaker
So I wouldn't be surprised, to be honest.
00:19:23
Speaker
So Nikki was a WWE wrestler at the same time as well.
00:19:28
Speaker
I almost think she's one of those Diabla success stories, to be honest.
00:19:33
Speaker
What is Diabla?
00:19:35
Speaker
Isn't that that subreddit where women, I guess, become managers?
00:19:40
Speaker
Yes, a subreddit where basically women strategize on how to hook rich men, basically, and keep them.
00:19:47
Speaker
Oh, so those are the actual gold diggers.
00:19:49
Speaker
Queen.
00:19:51
Speaker
Yeah, no, I'm not mad at it.
00:19:53
Speaker
I didn't say I was mad at it, but I'm saying... I'm not saying Nikki's a gold digger, but she even admitted, like, years after the fact that he did help her in her career, like, massively.
00:20:04
Speaker
So she got a reality TV show.
00:20:06
Speaker
She was, like, the face of the women's wrestling division.
00:20:10
Speaker
She basically became, like, a Kardashian.
00:20:12
Speaker
Like, she got endorsements.
00:20:15
Speaker
And that's not to say she didn't work hard, but when...
00:20:18
Speaker
But if you're dating, like, the biggest franchise player, that's going to open doors for you as John Cena's girlfriend.
00:20:25
Speaker
And it did for her.
00:20:26
Speaker
So they dated for six years and their relationship was documented on reality TV shows like Total Divas and Total Bellas.
00:20:32
Speaker
And at the beginning, Cena made it clear to Nikki that he never wanted marriage or kids.
00:20:37
Speaker
The reason being, like Cena would say, he was devoted to his career so...
00:20:44
Speaker
He didn't want to have kids because he wouldn't have time to raise them, which is fair enough.
00:20:48
Speaker
I mean, again, they're very busy people, so he knew he'd be an absent father.
00:20:53
Speaker
And after his divorce, he said that he just didn't want to go through that whole shebang again, which is another fucking red flag, because Nikki wanted to get married to him.
00:21:05
Speaker
So this was a sticking point for years in their relationship.
00:21:09
Speaker
Sina even gets a vasectomy so he can't have kids.
00:21:12
Speaker
Oh, so he was serious about that.
00:21:14
Speaker
He was serious.
00:21:15
Speaker
And all the while, Nikki's saying, I want to be a mom.
00:21:18
Speaker
I want us to get married.
00:21:20
Speaker
In the meantime, she's moving into his house.
00:21:22
Speaker
They're playing, like, she's playing house with him.
00:21:28
Speaker
And they just go back and forth.
00:21:31
Speaker
like over whether or not they get married.
00:21:33
Speaker
So eventually, I think it was in 2017 or 2018, Cena proposes to her in the ring in front of thousands of fans at WrestleMania, which is like the Super Bowl of WWE.
00:21:45
Speaker
But a couple of weeks before their wedding, they actually split up.
00:21:51
Speaker
I mean, Cena said he eventually like relented on being married and having kids, but Nikki felt like,
00:21:58
Speaker
he was only doing it to keep her around.
00:22:01
Speaker
Like, he didn't... His heart wasn't in it, basically.
00:22:03
Speaker
So it was a shut-up ring.
00:22:05
Speaker
Yeah, like, literally it was a shut-up ring.
00:22:07
Speaker
And he would say, like, really, really cryptic shit as well.
00:22:10
Speaker
Like, before they got engaged, he would say... Because, like, Nikki had to have surgery on her neck.
00:22:15
Speaker
So before she went under...
00:22:18
Speaker
he was like, oh, I whispered to her and I said, you know, someday I'm going to marry you.
00:22:22
Speaker
And she was like, yes.
00:22:23
Speaker
I was like, how fucked up is
Manipulative Proposals and Career Sacrifices
00:22:25
Speaker
that?
00:22:25
Speaker
Like, oh, my gosh, that is so manipulative.
00:22:28
Speaker
What?
00:22:29
Speaker
I mean, I feel like you can say a lot of supportive things, but not like dangle the one thing that she's been saying she values when she's literally under anesthesia for surgery.
00:22:37
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:22:38
Speaker
Like major surgery on her neck as well.
00:22:40
Speaker
I think she like broke her neck.
00:22:41
Speaker
Like that is just beyond fucked up.
00:22:43
Speaker
Yeah, that's cruel.
00:22:45
Speaker
Yeah, that feels manipulative.
00:22:46
Speaker
And I think a lot of his behavior here suggests that he's manipulative.
00:22:50
Speaker
Mm-hmm.
00:22:51
Speaker
So, yeah, so they break up.
00:22:54
Speaker
And in 2018... Wait, why did they break up?
00:22:57
Speaker
It was a combination of factors.
00:22:59
Speaker
Firstly, Nikki felt like that his heart wasn't in it.
00:23:02
Speaker
Oh, Nikki wasn't into it?
00:23:03
Speaker
And that Cena basically proposed to her as like a sharp ring, yeah, basically.
00:23:08
Speaker
Because ultimately, and this is the thing with something like marriage and kids...
00:23:12
Speaker
If the two people can't agree on whether they should do it or not, the relationship is a non-starter.
00:23:18
Speaker
If Sina was saying this when they first got together, that should have been her signal to bail on the relationship.
00:23:25
Speaker
Yeah, I guess it's so complicated because her career is wrapped up in him.
00:23:30
Speaker
So that adds like this layer of obligation she probably felt.
00:23:34
Speaker
Right, yeah.
00:23:36
Speaker
I just read, I'm just reading this article about the couple and there's this one line that's like, apparently she said that if being with him meant never being a wife or mother, that was a sacrifice she was willing to make.
00:23:48
Speaker
Like she said that to her family.
00:23:49
Speaker
And I'm like, girl, no, never sacrifice your wishes for a man.
00:23:56
Speaker
Yeah, she should have just let him put her on and then upgraded.
00:24:00
Speaker
Yeah.
00:24:01
Speaker
Right.
00:24:01
Speaker
Once it became clear he wasn't going to invest in her more than that.
00:24:05
Speaker
Yeah, once a man says he doesn't want to invest in you, that's when I make a mental note that he deserves to be exploited.
00:24:09
Speaker
So I'm just going to like, I'm just going to mine him for resources as long as I can until he gets sick of it and then bounces.
00:24:17
Speaker
And I think a point to note as well is that men know what marriage means.
00:24:21
Speaker
They know the significance of marriage.
00:24:24
Speaker
Like, don't let them bullshit you and say it's a piece of paper or, you know, where, you know, where it's basically the same as being married, but we're not.
00:24:33
Speaker
like marriage has real implications and protections that they are well aware of so if they're not willing to commit to you in that way don't waste your time oh i just want to point out the in this article i'm reading about how um it's from paste magazine and it says that nikki signed a contract to live in john's house
00:24:56
Speaker
Like, I'm just going to read this part because it's so funny.
00:24:57
Speaker
It says, Nikki signed a contract to live in John's house and they share a pet, which means they're effectively common-law married anyways.
00:25:03
Speaker
Though in Florida, where John and Nikki live, doesn't recognize such relationships.
00:25:07
Speaker
Making it official really only deems their relationship socially acceptable to people on the outside, not the two people involved.
00:25:14
Speaker
Uh... Eh!
00:25:16
Speaker
This is called undermining your own argument with it.
00:25:18
Speaker
Like it literally just said in Florida where John and Nikki live doesn't recognize this relationship.
00:25:22
Speaker
So yes, making it official does make a fucking difference.
00:25:26
Speaker
It does make it matters then.
00:25:28
Speaker
Yeah.
00:25:28
Speaker
Yeah.
00:25:29
Speaker
What did they mean by she signed a contract to live with him?
00:25:32
Speaker
Yeah.
00:25:32
Speaker
Savannah, do you know more about that?
00:25:33
Speaker
So it was on the reality show Total Divas, and she moved to Florida from California, I think, to live with him.
00:25:42
Speaker
And he made her sign like a 75-page contract.
00:25:47
Speaker
prenup and you're not even getting married and it said and it said stuff like if the relationship ends you have to be out by 11 a.m the next day stuff like that oh that's ridiculous that's ridiculous yeah no that's a red fucking flag yeah no this guy's petty as fuck
00:26:04
Speaker
He explained why, because he basically, like, pays or supports, not pays, but he supports his entire family.
00:26:13
Speaker
So he built his mum a house in Massachusetts that his brother lives in.
00:26:18
Speaker
He's got trust funds for his nieces and nephews.
00:26:21
Speaker
And he was trying to argue that he just doesn't want a woman to basically, like, rinse him, essentially.
00:26:27
Speaker
Yeah, if his name's on the house and they're not married.
00:26:31
Speaker
She has no right to it anyways.
00:26:32
Speaker
Like, it just seems excessive.
00:26:33
Speaker
It just seems excessive.
00:26:34
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:35
Speaker
Like, why would you make a woman sign a prenup to live in your house?
00:26:38
Speaker
That's like a fucking...
00:26:41
Speaker
That's low value as fuck.
00:26:43
Speaker
So he came across as a bit of an asshole in that whole reality TV show.
00:26:49
Speaker
Like, stint.
00:26:50
Speaker
A bit?
00:26:51
Speaker
A bit?
00:26:51
Speaker
No.
00:26:52
Speaker
He's like, fucking FDS villain.
00:26:54
Speaker
Yeah, and 75 pages that basically says you have to vacate the home as soon as we break up is pretty insane.
00:27:02
Speaker
And you have to live by his rules.
00:27:04
Speaker
Like, you have to put stuff where he wants you to put the... That actually just sounds like coercive control, honestly.
00:27:10
Speaker
Yeah, that's coercive control.
00:27:11
Speaker
That sounds actually abusive.
00:27:12
Speaker
And the thing is, he presented the contract when, like, on the day she moved in.
00:27:17
Speaker
It wasn't even like he sent it before.
00:27:20
Speaker
She started moving her stuff in and he was like, okay, sign this.
00:27:24
Speaker
And that's not fair.
00:27:26
Speaker
That's coercive control.
00:27:27
Speaker
That's what he's doing.
00:27:28
Speaker
He waits till she's in a position to not say no to spring it on her on purpose.
00:27:33
Speaker
Right?
00:27:33
Speaker
If you've already moved, all your stuff's going there, I'd have been like, hell no.
00:27:36
Speaker
And, like, you'll have to formally evict me now.
00:27:39
Speaker
Yeah.
00:27:40
Speaker
Like, okay, the fact that he sprung it on two different women at the last minute, like the 16 days before the wedding thing.
00:27:46
Speaker
It's deliberate.
00:27:47
Speaker
Yeah, that's manipulative.
00:27:48
Speaker
Doing it the day that she moves in.
00:27:50
Speaker
That's like, that's not really like a, like when you sign a contract, it should be freely of your own volition and not under duress.
00:27:57
Speaker
Yeah.
00:27:58
Speaker
It's just like signing your tenancy contract on the day you move in.
00:28:01
Speaker
Like you wouldn't really do that.
00:28:03
Speaker
You need time to read it, digest it, possibly seek legal advice if you want to.
00:28:08
Speaker
So it's really bad.
00:28:09
Speaker
I think he knows she would have been scared off.
00:28:12
Speaker
That's why he waited till she wanted to move.
00:28:14
Speaker
So this is a way for, again, once again, of him exploiting her, getting what he wants and then waiting till she gets there and then springing on all these conditions.
00:28:22
Speaker
Right.
00:28:22
Speaker
If he had just given it to her up front, she would have time to think about it and maybe said no.
00:28:26
Speaker
But he doesn't want her.
00:28:27
Speaker
He wants her to live there.
00:28:28
Speaker
Right.
00:28:28
Speaker
He wants her to live there and he wants her to completely obey him, which is why he did that.
00:28:34
Speaker
So the alarm bells were ringing like from the from the very beginning of their relationship, from the time when he said, I don't want marriage and kids to the time where he was controlling to the time they were in couples therapy.
00:28:46
Speaker
And, you know, Sina basically said in a Rolling Stones interview, I'm selfish as fuck.
00:28:51
Speaker
When a man tells you who he is, believe him.
00:28:53
Speaker
Believe him.
00:28:54
Speaker
Believe him.
Quick Remarriage and Motive Questions
00:28:55
Speaker
Exactly.
00:28:55
Speaker
So after their split, Nikki gets with, I think he's called Artem, the dancer from Dancing with the Stars.
00:29:05
Speaker
Personally, I think Artem's a massive rebound because she's still thirsty for Cena, as far as I can see.
00:29:12
Speaker
And then in October 2020, Cena gets married to somebody else.
00:29:17
Speaker
Ugh.
00:29:19
Speaker
How long did they date?
00:29:20
Speaker
What kind of crazy contract did he make or sign this time?
00:29:22
Speaker
18 months.
00:29:24
Speaker
18 months.
00:29:25
Speaker
It's weird to me that the amount of time he has to date someone before marrying them gets shorter and shorter each time.
00:29:31
Speaker
Because he didn't want to marry these women.
00:29:33
Speaker
That's why.
00:29:35
Speaker
That's what it comes back to.
00:29:38
Speaker
What's his new girl's name?
00:29:40
Speaker
What's his wife's name?
00:29:41
Speaker
She's called Shay.
00:29:43
Speaker
Shay?
00:29:43
Speaker
She's called Shay.
00:29:45
Speaker
They met when he was filming a movie in Vancouver and they dated for like, it must have been less than 18 months because they got married on the down low like last October.
00:29:55
Speaker
Mm-hmm.
00:29:56
Speaker
Oh, Shay is Canadian.
00:29:57
Speaker
Hey, sorry.
00:30:00
Speaker
This also seems again, because he seems manipulative.
00:30:03
Speaker
I would not be surprised if this was like a dig at Nikki because men do stuff like this.
00:30:08
Speaker
And I know we had a post on Instagram about how like sometimes men just give the next girl what you wanted because they don't want to feel like they're the problem.
00:30:19
Speaker
Yeah.
00:30:20
Speaker
Especially because Nikki Bella moved on with her life, right?
00:30:23
Speaker
She started dating someone else.
00:30:24
Speaker
She got pregnant and he looks like a tool bag.
00:30:27
Speaker
And she ended the relationship, actually.
00:30:29
Speaker
Like, finally, she ended it as well.
00:30:31
Speaker
So that could also be possibly crushed ego, maybe.
00:30:36
Speaker
Yeah.
00:30:37
Speaker
Yeah.
00:30:39
Speaker
Also, his new wife, Shay, is an engineer.
00:30:41
Speaker
So I honestly think she's too good for him.
00:30:42
Speaker
Like, she's above his league.
00:30:44
Speaker
I just think with his relationship history, it just brings up so, so many red flags.
00:30:50
Speaker
And from what he said about himself, like, he's very... He's dedicated to his career, which is fine.
00:30:56
Speaker
But don't go then seeking out relationships that you just don't have time for.
00:31:02
Speaker
Like, I just think that is...
00:31:04
Speaker
just completely unfair and unreasonable.
00:31:07
Speaker
And then you expect the woman to then do whatever you say to fit into your program.
00:31:12
Speaker
And there's a big age gap between his wife and him now, because his wife's only 30 and he's 44.
00:31:19
Speaker
So that's also another red flag.
00:31:20
Speaker
That's another red flag, yeah.
00:31:22
Speaker
So it looks like, yeah, he got a quickie marriage to a much younger woman that he didn't date for very long, suspiciously after his old ex-girlfriend got married and has a child.
00:31:35
Speaker
But to be honest, I think Artem is a rebound because she was saying how when she had her first child with Artem, Cena called her to congratulate her.
00:31:46
Speaker
And then she was saying how John and I will forever be tied.
00:31:50
Speaker
I'm like, what the fuck?
00:31:51
Speaker
That's...
00:31:51
Speaker
No.
00:31:53
Speaker
John and I will forever be tied together.
00:31:55
Speaker
Oh my God, that's so pygmy.
00:31:57
Speaker
Her entire career is because she's connected to John Cena.
00:31:59
Speaker
She probably just doesn't feel...
00:32:02
Speaker
comfortable going scorched earth on that relationship the way she probably needs to.
00:32:06
Speaker
Because I mean, at this point, I'm like, she's already independently famous.
00:32:09
Speaker
I'd have been like, fuck John.
00:32:10
Speaker
And then moved on with my life because you can't unfamous her.
00:32:13
Speaker
Yeah, that's true.
00:32:16
Speaker
If anything, going scorched earth would make her more famous.
00:32:18
Speaker
Yeah, she seems like pretty gracious about the whole thing, which I think says a lot about her character and like that she's overall probably a very kind-hearted person.
00:32:26
Speaker
But I think this is a time where she should be incredibly selfish because it's clear John Cena is going to do that.
00:32:32
Speaker
Also, an article was posted three hours ago with the title, Nikki Bella explains why her and Artem blah, blah, blah, last name, can't pronounce it, wedding keeps getting postponed.
00:32:43
Speaker
So it looks like...
00:32:47
Speaker
new man just keeps getting postponed and oh my god that's so sad but is it her is it him well that will well she's currently in couples therapy with autumn as well oh so it's like sis sis i'm not anti-couples therapy but it's just sort of um
00:33:05
Speaker
You just wonder why, right?
00:33:08
Speaker
Like, I feel like couples therapy should be for when the couple's already in a good place.
00:33:13
Speaker
But often people use it as a sort of Hail Mary or a Band-Aid when... Yeah, exactly.
00:33:17
Speaker
Like, the relationship's already on death's door.
00:33:21
Speaker
And if you start having to go within the first, like, year, I would say, the relationship is in massive trouble, to be honest, because that should be the honeymoon stage, really.
00:33:29
Speaker
I mean, not the honeymoon stage, but that should be the stage where...
00:33:33
Speaker
You're getting comfortable, you're enjoying each other, not...
00:33:37
Speaker
tashing it out with a therapist per se yeah i would say if you have to go to therapy within the first year like you you're having a lot of fights and you're like oh let's go to couples therapy then yeah the relationship's not good but there are some couples and in fact my my own parents said like that they should have done this before they got married that they should have been more proactive about couples about couples therapy not using it as a band-aid right before getting divorced like some some people just do it like proactively just to like yeah that's different yeah
00:34:06
Speaker
Yeah.
00:34:07
Speaker
So so that the reason that she's saying that their wedding has been postponed is because her husband or because Artem wants his parents to be able to attend.
00:34:16
Speaker
And I guess because of coronavirus, they haven't been able to travel.
00:34:19
Speaker
So that seems like actually maybe a legitimate excuse.
00:34:22
Speaker
I mean, they can always get the paper marriage and have the physical wedding later.
00:34:25
Speaker
A lot of people have been doing that.
00:34:26
Speaker
But yeah.
00:34:27
Speaker
They could.
00:34:27
Speaker
They could.
00:34:28
Speaker
But it could also be an excuse.
00:34:30
Speaker
So you never know.
00:34:31
Speaker
And I still don't understand why people have babies before getting married.
00:34:35
Speaker
Yeah, it's weird to have babies before getting married.
00:34:37
Speaker
Yeah.
00:34:38
Speaker
She had a panty baby.
00:34:40
Speaker
A pandemic baby?
00:34:41
Speaker
A panty baby.
Should Women Prioritize Their Needs Over a Man's?
00:34:43
Speaker
With the John Cena thing, I think it throws up a lot of lessons.
00:34:46
Speaker
Like, you know, the first one is that if a guy...
00:34:51
Speaker
tells you that he doesn't want marriage or kids, believe him.
00:34:54
Speaker
Don't stick around trying to change his mind.
00:34:56
Speaker
Don't talk yourself out of wanting what you want just to hang on to this guy.
00:35:01
Speaker
Because there are other guys who will gladly give you what you want without hesitating.
00:35:07
Speaker
And also, the longer you stick around, the more this guy thinks he's doing something because he must think, oh, well, if she's sticking around, then, you know, she must really, really, really, really want me if she's willing to give all that up for me.
00:35:19
Speaker
And that just inflates their ego.
00:35:21
Speaker
Yeah.
00:35:22
Speaker
Yeah, like never sacrifice what you want just to keep a man who isn't even that great.
00:35:28
Speaker
It's literally never worth it.
00:35:30
Speaker
And they would never do the same for you.
00:35:31
Speaker
Exactly.
00:35:32
Speaker
Okay, so the other thing too is because she's at 30, she's 38.
00:35:35
Speaker
I guess she wanted to have the child...
00:35:38
Speaker
right away.
00:35:39
Speaker
I kind of don't blame her for that, actually.
00:35:41
Speaker
I kind of see where she's going with it.
00:35:42
Speaker
She's like, I wanted to have the baby now.
00:35:44
Speaker
The wedding is getting postponed because of coronavirus.
00:35:47
Speaker
It's not the best way to do things, but I'm kind of seeing the reasoning.
00:35:50
Speaker
It's sort of it's a weird couple of years.
00:35:52
Speaker
I think on a normal timeline, maybe like this is not an excuse, but yeah.
00:35:57
Speaker
Yeah, true.
00:35:57
Speaker
Maybe.
00:35:58
Speaker
Yeah, if it was not if there was not a pandemic, then I would be more suspicious.
00:36:01
Speaker
But the fact that, yeah, it's been a weird couple of years, I can be
00:36:05
Speaker
I kind of get it.
00:36:05
Speaker
Yeah.
00:36:06
Speaker
Also, their baby looks so fucking cute.
00:36:08
Speaker
They actually look so adorable.
00:36:09
Speaker
Their family is so precious.
00:36:11
Speaker
Yeah, their Instagram is goals.
00:36:12
Speaker
It's really cute.
00:36:13
Speaker
But again, you never know.
00:36:14
Speaker
And also what was really cool is that she's got an identical twin sister, Bri, and they were pregnant at the same time.
00:36:20
Speaker
They think they gave birth within like two days of each other.
00:36:23
Speaker
How cool is that?
00:36:25
Speaker
Dang.
00:36:25
Speaker
That is adorable.
00:36:26
Speaker
That's super cool.
00:36:27
Speaker
Also, when a guy says he doesn't want to get married, the to you is often silent because what these men will do is they will waste, like, women's time and then they'll eventually, like, realise that they're running out of smoke, becoming decrepit, and they will marry the next woman that comes along.
00:36:45
Speaker
This is why when I heard that Sina got married, I was like, I'm not surprised he's done this.
00:36:50
Speaker
This is a tale as old as time.
00:36:51
Speaker
Look at George Clooney, for example.
00:36:53
Speaker
He had so many forever girlfriends.
00:36:55
Speaker
Even guys like that, they start to reach the end of their rope when they can realistically pull.
00:37:01
Speaker
They always joke about women hitting the wall.
00:37:02
Speaker
Like men do hit the wall.
00:37:05
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:37:05
Speaker
It's not like I think they all have this like like vision that they're going to be swinging bachelors into their 50s.
00:37:10
Speaker
But that's just not the case.
00:37:12
Speaker
There becomes a stage where you either got to outright buy prostitutes or like outright buy sugar babies or get in a relationship with a woman who actually likes you.
00:37:20
Speaker
Right.
00:37:24
Speaker
Yeah.
00:37:25
Speaker
And, you know, I don't think Cena looks bad at all.
00:37:27
Speaker
You know, physically, like in terms of his body, he's he's probably in the top one percent.
00:37:32
Speaker
But face wise, he is looking his age like he's not.
00:37:36
Speaker
the young, you know, fresh face wrestler anymore.
00:37:40
Speaker
I mean, I'm sure even he knows that now.
00:37:42
Speaker
Yeah.
00:37:43
Speaker
And his body's got to be going to shit.
00:37:44
Speaker
Like these guys who are in WWE, they're basically decrepit by the time they retire because of the wear and tear.
00:37:52
Speaker
Yeah, so the wear and tear has accelerated in that lifestyle.
00:37:57
Speaker
Ultimately, you just have to know your worth and when it's time to walk away from a relationship.
00:38:01
Speaker
And I just don't... I see a lot of women convince themselves that we have a great relationship, but I want to get married and he doesn't.
00:38:10
Speaker
And it's like...
00:38:12
Speaker
You can't have half a marriage.
00:38:13
Speaker
You can't have half a child.
00:38:15
Speaker
I think marriage and kids are probably the two things you cannot really negotiate on and possibly religion as well.
00:38:21
Speaker
You can't really negotiate on.
00:38:23
Speaker
So it's important to bear in mind what your deal breakers are.
00:38:27
Speaker
And if marriage or kids or anything in a relationship is important to you, you have to be willing to walk away if the person that you're with is not willing or able to give that to you.
00:38:39
Speaker
Yeah.
00:38:40
Speaker
Also, I have heard of cases where a woman really wants a child, the man doesn't want it.
00:38:44
Speaker
And so if they have a child, the man will say something like, okay, I'll let you have a child, but I won't do anything to contribute to it.
00:38:51
Speaker
I've seen a lot of these cases in Breaking Mom, like the Breaking Mom subreddit.
00:38:55
Speaker
Yeah.
00:38:55
Speaker
And so these sorts of relationships often end up with a woman paying for all the child's expenses, doing everything.
00:39:00
Speaker
They're living in the same house, so she's still cooking and cleaning for him, but he's just a deadbeat with a mommy McBang maid in the same house.
00:39:08
Speaker
So never be honest.
00:39:09
Speaker
That is so depressing.
00:39:11
Speaker
It's fucking sad that there are women out there who agree to that.
00:39:14
Speaker
I've seen it the other way around as well, where the woman doesn't want to have kids, but the guy's like, no, no, no, I want kids.
00:39:19
Speaker
I'll help.
00:39:19
Speaker
I'll help.
00:39:20
Speaker
Obviously, when the kid gets here, he doesn't do shit.
00:39:24
Speaker
And so the kid is left with somebody, the mother, who ultimately didn't want them.
00:39:29
Speaker
Yeah.
00:39:29
Speaker
The irony of that too is like, they would have just been so much better off just dumping that guy and finding a guy who wanted to have kids.
00:39:35
Speaker
So now they're, they're, they're hanging on to this guy and they're robbing themselves of other opportunities.
00:39:41
Speaker
And they're robbing their children.
00:39:43
Speaker
Yeah.
00:39:43
Speaker
Of a father.
00:39:45
Speaker
It feels just strange to me.
00:39:47
Speaker
And I know like a lot of people don't feel like, oh, I love my kid right away.
00:39:50
Speaker
And they might not feel warm, fuzzy feelings, but you have something that's literally dependent on you to survive and you can't muster up a single fuck to give.
00:39:58
Speaker
Yeah.
00:39:59
Speaker
Yeah, that's fucked.
00:40:00
Speaker
Even if you don't want children, it feels like low value is fucked to have the child and just like not not care for them.
00:40:06
Speaker
At all, right?
00:40:07
Speaker
Yeah.
00:40:07
Speaker
Like, you know.
00:40:08
Speaker
Yeah.
00:40:09
Speaker
That is low value as fuck.
00:40:10
Speaker
But yeah.
00:40:11
Speaker
I know people like to say, oh, FDS are only interested in men who are mega rich, which is a complete lie.
00:40:16
Speaker
But there are some women who are, and that's fine.
00:40:19
Speaker
But...
00:40:21
Speaker
they also come with their own problems and drawbacks.
00:40:23
Speaker
Like wealthy men, they often didn't become wealthy by being generous philanthropists, right?
00:40:30
Speaker
They know how to amass wealth and they also know how to retain wealth as well.
00:40:36
Speaker
And if you, I mean, sometimes if you then come into their orbit, they don't see you as somebody who is wealthy.
00:40:43
Speaker
who's going to be an equal partner in their world, they see you as a threat and they will do whatever they can to make sure that you don't get what's owed to you and they will do whatever they can to make sure that you're shut out as well.
Challenges of Dating Wealthy Men
00:40:57
Speaker
So you also have to vet wealthy men really, really carefully.
00:41:02
Speaker
Just because somebody's got money, that doesn't mean that they'll be generous, as we've seen with John Cena when...
00:41:07
Speaker
He put the you have to give the gifts back clause in his prenup or when he made Nikki Bella sign that ridiculous contract.
00:41:14
Speaker
That doesn't necessarily mean he's going to be generous.
00:41:17
Speaker
There's this quote that I saw in People magazine where he was saying that because she signed that contract, he realized she really likes him and she's really in it for the long haul.
00:41:28
Speaker
It seems manipulative for him to say that.
00:41:31
Speaker
But also it was all for naught, wasn't it?
00:41:33
Speaker
It didn't really matter at the end of the day because she still didn't get what she wanted.
00:41:37
Speaker
And he spent the rest of the relationship still treating her badly.
00:41:41
Speaker
Right.
00:41:41
Speaker
So I feel like with Nikki, she should have cut her losses at some point.
00:41:45
Speaker
Yeah.
00:41:45
Speaker
It's clear that like John Cena just has no problem leashing off women for exactly as long as it benefits him.
00:41:52
Speaker
And then not a second more.
00:41:53
Speaker
Yeah.
00:41:53
Speaker
Yeah.
00:41:53
Speaker
And then not a second more.
00:41:54
Speaker
And then and then secondly, you know, all the WWE wrestlers have a storyline, right?
00:42:00
Speaker
Like I imagine like having a hot girlfriend and having that storyline between their love was also a big part of his story.
00:42:08
Speaker
Like he benefited from that.
00:42:09
Speaker
Yeah, he benefited from that as well.
00:42:11
Speaker
Right.
00:42:11
Speaker
Yeah, so if you're in a situation where a man is, like, supporting your career in some way, you have to have this, you have to adopt this, like, cold, ruthless mindset, like men do, of I'm only going to stay in this relationship for as long as it benefits me, and then as soon as it stops benefiting me, I'm going to end it.
00:42:28
Speaker
And when you're interacting with men, always keep in mind, like, maximizing my own benefit, maximizing my own benefit.
00:42:34
Speaker
Like, basically, use him in a way that will be maximally beneficial to you, and then...
00:42:40
Speaker
take the emotions out of it altogether honestly like understand that that it almost seems like that what they had like with the whole wwe like story love storyline kind of thing um was like almost like commercializing their love story like understand that this is not like true love this is like money this is
00:42:58
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:42:59
Speaker
You have to approach these sorts of money making relationships with a pragmatic mindset.
00:43:05
Speaker
Yeah, this is this is, again, reality TV for men.
00:43:08
Speaker
So the whole engagement and the whole storyline is like part of it.
00:43:12
Speaker
It's part of it.
00:43:13
Speaker
Yeah.
00:43:14
Speaker
This is basically like Real Housewives if they were swole.
00:43:19
Speaker
Know your worth, right?
00:43:20
Speaker
Like, it seems like Nikki Bella thought that she depended on John Cena for her career, when in fact it was him depending on her for his career, in some ways.
00:43:27
Speaker
And also, like, she doesn't need to beg a man to marry her at all.
00:43:32
Speaker
She's beautiful, she's accomplished, she's extremely, extremely kind-hearted.
00:43:38
Speaker
And it just, it was really sad watching Total, um...
00:43:42
Speaker
like divas and total bellas because she would see her twin sister, Bri, like she found a guy who was absolutely crazy about her.
00:43:50
Speaker
They got married, had a kid and, you know, it would make you question, you know, what's wrong with me?
00:43:57
Speaker
Why won't he commit to me?
00:43:59
Speaker
And it was just really, really sad.
00:44:00
Speaker
Just like seeing her self-esteem just tank.
00:44:04
Speaker
Each time you basically told her, I don't want to marry you and I will never marry you.
00:44:07
Speaker
He said that so many times to her.
00:44:09
Speaker
Also,
00:44:10
Speaker
Rich men who don't spend money on you are equal in value to poor men.
00:44:14
Speaker
Yeah.
00:44:14
Speaker
Oh, yeah.
00:44:15
Speaker
Talk about it.
00:44:15
Speaker
Right?
00:44:16
Speaker
Yeah.
00:44:16
Speaker
Like, let me go on this rant a little bit.
00:44:18
Speaker
Okay.
00:44:19
Speaker
So men seem to think that when a man is high value, it's like objective, like the more attractive or the more tall or the more money he has, the more objectively high value he is.
00:44:28
Speaker
No, like I'm of the view that women define men's value.
00:44:32
Speaker
And if a man does not spend money on you as a woman or doesn't invest in you or treats you badly...
00:44:37
Speaker
He could be a fucking billionaire or trillionaire, whatever.
00:44:40
Speaker
If he doesn't spend money on you, he's just as good as the fucking homeless broke guy at the gas station.
00:44:44
Speaker
Yeah, he's bringing you zero value.
00:44:46
Speaker
He's just like like trying to like hook and bait you based on perceived lengthy value, but at the same time exploiting you with no investment on his part.
00:44:54
Speaker
Yeah, that's just a scam.
00:44:55
Speaker
And even if he's buying you stuff as well, you need to think about proportionality.
00:44:59
Speaker
So let's say, for example, you have an engagement ring, that's £5,000, right?
00:45:05
Speaker
Just for argument's sake.
00:45:06
Speaker
If he's earning, you know, $60 million a year, that's chicken feed.
00:45:10
Speaker
That's different if he was earning, say, £45,000 a year.
00:45:14
Speaker
So even if he's buying you gifts, like, you also need... I'm not saying you need to look at every price tag, but you also need to look at the effort and the sacrifice that's gone into such gifts, right?
00:45:24
Speaker
True.
00:45:25
Speaker
Because that's also how rich men can keep you in a box.
00:45:28
Speaker
They can buy you a lot of stuff, but if it's cheap shit or stuff that you don't want or stuff that you never asked for, it's still selfish and self-centred because they're not thinking about what you want.
00:45:39
Speaker
They're just thinking about how it makes them look just to say, I gave you this.
00:45:43
Speaker
Because Sina did get her stuff.
00:45:44
Speaker
Like he bought her designer bags and a Range Rover, but for somebody...
00:45:50
Speaker
on Cena's level, like he was probably worth around 30 million dollars at the time, that's chicken feed.
00:45:56
Speaker
Like his, like his car collection alone is worth millions.
00:45:59
Speaker
Like it isn't spoken about enough on the subreddit how to vet rich men because some people see rich men as the prize and the end goal, but you have to vet them really hard as well.
Dangers of Power Dynamics with Influential Men
00:46:10
Speaker
Like don't be blinded by their wealth or, or their assets because they will fuck you over in different ways to a broke man.
00:46:17
Speaker
Yeah.
00:46:18
Speaker
And like we kind of talked about in the Dave Portnoy episode, like especially if they're the more famous partner or they have the platform, they can really destroy you in ways.
00:46:27
Speaker
So it's almost more.
00:46:29
Speaker
Yeah.
00:46:30
Speaker
The stakes are higher in some respects, meaning like the risks are higher in some respects because this is a person that has infinitely more power.
00:46:36
Speaker
power than you, you know, legally, socially, economically, or whatever way that they built their wealth.
00:46:41
Speaker
So even if you do get in this relationship, you have to make sure that you have some kind of like recourse if you just decides to pull everything.
00:46:50
Speaker
Like, are you going to be homeless?
00:46:51
Speaker
Is he going to destroy, you know, if he's a rich guy that works in your industry, is he going to destroy your future job prospects?
00:46:56
Speaker
Like there's so many ways it could go badly if you're not careful vetting.
00:47:02
Speaker
It's very high risk, I'd say.
00:47:04
Speaker
I agree, actually.
00:47:05
Speaker
As someone who's dated wealthy men, it is very high risk.
00:47:08
Speaker
The things that they can do to you when you don't have your own wealth is, yeah, don't underestimate that.
00:47:16
Speaker
It can leave you vulnerable, which is why you have to vet them as well and make sure that you are approaching them from a place of security and not desperately going goo-goo-ga-ga over them just because they're it.
00:47:28
Speaker
That's why we don't do the gold digger strategy thing, because it's just not, it's not, it's not FDS in the sense of like, you're so much better off.
00:47:36
Speaker
Although we're not anti-gold digger, but.
00:47:38
Speaker
We're not anti-gold digger, but it's just not, it's not FDS.
00:47:41
Speaker
It's just more or less like.
00:47:43
Speaker
Speak for yourself, bro.
00:47:44
Speaker
No, I'm kidding.
00:47:45
Speaker
No, I'm saying.
00:47:46
Speaker
I'm saying like, we're not like, okay, I think I talked about this in the Patreon.
00:47:49
Speaker
Like there's an aspect of a lot of the gold digger type videos where they're big on like the femininity training and learning how to be seductive to a man or signal your submission to him, et cetera.
00:48:03
Speaker
And all those things make you look like a clown if you don't have anything else going for you, quite frankly, because...
00:48:10
Speaker
Again, if you have your own wealth, your own platform, your own network, your own circle, then you can come to that person in a position of more power, right?
00:48:19
Speaker
Than if you're just trying to do the femininity training and then essentially they may or may not look at you like a working class side piece.
00:48:27
Speaker
Side piece, right?
00:48:28
Speaker
Yeah.
00:48:28
Speaker
Understand when it comes to marriage, men generally tend to marry within their own social class.
00:48:33
Speaker
Yeah.
00:48:34
Speaker
Men want to marry their equal or someone better than them.
00:48:36
Speaker
So that's, I think that's why he married Shay so quickly is because she's an engineer.
00:48:40
Speaker
She's beautiful.
00:48:40
Speaker
She's accomplished.
00:48:41
Speaker
I think she's actually too good for him.
00:48:43
Speaker
Right.
00:48:43
Speaker
That's why we say at FDS, if you want a high value man, you have to be a high value woman because high value men want high value women.
00:48:49
Speaker
And just to tee off what Rose said as well, you can have, you can still, and this is where FDS, I think, takes the dating strategy to a different level, is that you can have the looks, the career, the social circles, everything going for you like Nikki Bella did.
00:49:05
Speaker
But if you don't,
00:49:07
Speaker
if you don't have rock solid standards and boundaries, you will still get fucked over by men.
00:49:12
Speaker
It doesn't really matter, you know, how successful you are outside of the relationship if you don't come into the relationship with clear standards, boundaries and deal breakers and not only having them, but being willing to enforce and act upon them as well.
00:49:29
Speaker
And this is why FDS...
00:49:32
Speaker
drills home the message that you need to have standards and boundaries to ensure that you are living as authentically as you can.
00:49:39
Speaker
And also so that you can ensure that the relationships with men that you have are actually serving you and making you truly happy and giving you what you want.
00:49:48
Speaker
Yeah.
00:49:48
Speaker
Well said, Savannah.
00:49:50
Speaker
And here ended the lesson.
00:49:52
Speaker
I also want to talk about this contract some more because there's, it is actually.
00:49:56
Speaker
No, no, no.
00:49:58
Speaker
Because from a legal standpoint, it is the most manipulative fucking thing I've ever seen.
00:50:04
Speaker
Okay.
00:50:04
Speaker
Okay.
00:50:05
Speaker
We'll give you a bit of like bonus content preview guys.
00:50:08
Speaker
We'll just go, um, we'll just do a straight roast of this, of this, of, of John Cena's moving in contract.
00:50:14
Speaker
Yeah, yeah.
00:50:15
Speaker
I just need like five minutes for that because because like, OK, first of all, it's specified that she was a guest.
00:50:21
Speaker
Like the contract said that she was a guest, which is OK.
00:50:26
Speaker
First of all, it's like evil genius, because if she's not a resident, like if it legally defines her as a guest and not a resident, then that means she has basically no legal rights.
00:50:35
Speaker
Again, the question is, is how legal is that?
00:50:37
Speaker
You can't like most states.
00:50:38
Speaker
It's like if you live continuously in a place for more than two weeks, the state recognizes that as your domicile.
00:50:43
Speaker
So, again, sometimes I feel like they pad out these contracts with all these clauses that are actually against actual
Controlling Relationships via Contracts
00:50:49
Speaker
state law.
00:50:49
Speaker
And it's just an intimidation tactic.
00:50:51
Speaker
It is.
00:50:52
Speaker
I mean, but again, but again, it's the fact that he even gave her one in the first place.
00:50:56
Speaker
That's deeply problematic.
00:50:58
Speaker
Yeah.
00:50:58
Speaker
Yeah.
00:50:59
Speaker
No, but the reason why I think this is manipulative is because it creates that, it's like dread game.
00:51:03
Speaker
Like it creates that uncertainty in her.
00:51:04
Speaker
Yes, that's it.
00:51:06
Speaker
Dread game.
00:51:07
Speaker
That's it.
00:51:07
Speaker
Yes.
00:51:08
Speaker
So it's basically, it's like creating insecurity in the relationship.
00:51:12
Speaker
She's thinking, oh, like he could kick me out at any moment.
00:51:14
Speaker
So I better not get in a fight with him.
00:51:15
Speaker
Right.
00:51:16
Speaker
It creates the same insecurity as like triple talak does in, uh, you know, triple talk in Islam, you can like say talak, talak, talak and divorce your, you know, divorce a woman on the spot.
00:51:26
Speaker
So it creates this like insecurity.
00:51:27
Speaker
The woman is thinking like, Oh, I better not.
00:51:30
Speaker
Oh, I better not piss him off.
00:51:31
Speaker
I better not do this or that.
00:51:32
Speaker
He could divorce me on the spot.
00:51:34
Speaker
Right.
00:51:34
Speaker
So it causes women to police themselves and to just put, it puts them in a more like submissive state.
00:51:39
Speaker
So that's why I mean, it's actually just fucking, that's what I mean about it being like course of control.
00:51:43
Speaker
Right.
00:51:44
Speaker
Um,
00:51:45
Speaker
And then the other thing was that he said that the reason why he needed this contract was because, oh, I support my family.
00:51:52
Speaker
I'd be damned to let anyone take that away from me.
00:51:54
Speaker
He's basically saying he's afraid of, like, a woman rinsing him.
00:51:57
Speaker
He's basically saying she's afraid she's a gold digger because he's giving it to her.
00:52:02
Speaker
Yeah.
00:52:03
Speaker
And then, but I'm reading this article about in People Magazine describing him, like telling her, and it sounds to me like really fucking, like this is an example of men using emotional manipulation to get women to be like, oh, okay, baby, I'll let you walk all over me and shit on me because you're such a nice person.
00:52:20
Speaker
He basically said like, I support my mom.
00:52:22
Speaker
I support my brother, blah, blah, blah.
00:52:24
Speaker
This is why this is so important to me.
00:52:25
Speaker
And she's thinking, oh, I guess you're fucking me over because you're a good person kind of thing.
00:52:29
Speaker
And also, haven't you noticed as well, because this has happened to me in the past, where men will either directly or indirectly label you as something.
00:52:36
Speaker
So one time a guy called me possessive because it then puts you on the defensive to prove that you're not that way.
00:52:42
Speaker
It's almost like making you do a monkey dance to prove that you're not that way.
00:52:47
Speaker
But then you'll start behaving in a way that is appealing to them because you want to prove to them that you're not that way.
00:52:53
Speaker
this undesirable thing.
00:52:54
Speaker
Yeah.
00:52:55
Speaker
If that makes sense.
00:52:56
Speaker
Yeah.
00:52:56
Speaker
Men do this all the time when they call women like, oh, you're materialistic.
00:53:00
Speaker
Oh, you're this.
00:53:00
Speaker
Like men will accuse women of being materialistic.
How Labels Manipulate Women
00:53:04
Speaker
Yeah.
00:53:04
Speaker
So that women go, oh, I'm not materialistic.
00:53:06
Speaker
I'm not materialistic.
00:53:07
Speaker
Yeah.
00:53:07
Speaker
You don't need to do anything for me.
00:53:09
Speaker
You don't need to like, you can shit all over me and disrespect me and I'm not going to expect anything because I want to prove that I'm not materialistic.
00:53:15
Speaker
They'll demonize normal behavior in women as like, or, you know, wanting security or wanting investment.
00:53:22
Speaker
They'll demonize that as like, oh, you're materialistic.
00:53:24
Speaker
Oh, you're possessive.
00:53:25
Speaker
You're a gold digger, blah, blah, blah.
00:53:27
Speaker
And that puts women, yeah, like Savannah said, it puts you on the back foot to prove that you're not, but that forces you to behave in a way that's beneficial to men.
00:53:34
Speaker
Yeah.
00:53:34
Speaker
Don't accept their labels, right?
00:53:35
Speaker
Because the other thing too is materialism is like subjective to a certain extent.
00:53:40
Speaker
Some guys think you're materialistic if you want to eat at a restaurant that's not a fast food joint, right?
00:53:47
Speaker
It's so subjective in some respects.
00:53:48
Speaker
So even when I see things like, especially if you're on a dating profile, they're like, I don't like materialistic women.
00:53:53
Speaker
It's like immediate swipe left, man, because
00:53:55
Speaker
this is a person who's going to, who's already like made a decision or like categorize people in a certain way without any type of nuance.
00:54:03
Speaker
So he's already decided that you don't deserve shit and that he's going to like try to negotiate down your standards.
00:54:09
Speaker
And so, and the last point that I wanted to make about this was that
00:54:13
Speaker
Two weeks before their wedding, she called it off because, quote, John acted more and more like he was doing her a favor by somehow conceding to go ahead and marry her, the insider said.
00:54:24
Speaker
Nikki doesn't need a pity proposal, a pity wedding, a pity husband.
00:54:26
Speaker
She's phenomenal.
00:54:27
Speaker
Tremendous woman.
00:54:28
Speaker
Agreed she is a phenomenal, tremendous woman.
00:54:31
Speaker
However, the...
Nikki Bella's Decision to Leave and Recognizing Red Flags
00:54:34
Speaker
The idea that I'm so glad that she walked away at this point because this line about, oh, he acted like he was doing me a favor by marrying me.
00:54:43
Speaker
That is like if she had married him, he probably would have been a fucking abuser because that's what abusive men say.
00:54:50
Speaker
And like they act like they're the prize, that they're doing you such a favor by marrying you.
00:54:55
Speaker
And that anytime you step out of line or do something they don't like, they're just like, oh, you know, I guess you're not appreciating my valiant efforts to...
00:55:02
Speaker
marry you or whatever right they they act like they're the prize and then they it's their way of like devaluing you right devaluation is one of the first steps in narcissistic abuse and so that is such a huge red flag and i'm so so glad that nikki bella saved herself from that i'm really scared for shay like his current wife yeah because this is how he is right and so i hope that she's like smart and savvy enough to
00:55:25
Speaker
to get out while she still can.
00:55:27
Speaker
Shay, if you happen to be listening to this, just don't forget FDS is here for you.
00:55:32
Speaker
You can find us over on our Twitter account and the subreddit RFDS.
00:55:36
Speaker
We are here for you.
00:55:37
Speaker
Yeah.
00:55:38
Speaker
We are, we will stan you.
00:55:39
Speaker
Yeah.
00:55:40
Speaker
And that's our show.
00:55:43
Speaker
Check out our Patreon at patreon.com forward slash the female dating strategy for weekly bonus content.
00:55:49
Speaker
You have, you guys have to listen to the free range pasture race sperm episode.
00:55:55
Speaker
That's one of the funnier episodes.
00:55:57
Speaker
I think that and the prison episode, those are my two favorite bonus content.
00:56:03
Speaker
So yeah, check out our Patreon.
00:56:06
Speaker
You can also follow us on Twitter at fem.strat and our website at thefemaledatingstrategy.com.
00:56:11
Speaker
We have a forum there if you want to discuss any of these things further with other people.
00:56:16
Speaker
FDS members.
00:56:17
Speaker
We also have a Discord on our Patreon if you want to talk directly with us.
00:56:22
Speaker
Thanks for listening, Queens.
00:56:23
Speaker
And for all you scrotes out there, you can't see me!
00:56:28
Speaker
Die bad.
00:56:30
Speaker
See you next week.