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Inner Voice Madness image

Inner Voice Madness

POS Podcast Productions
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What does your inner voice sound like?  

Transcript

Understanding Inner Voices

00:00:14
Speaker
What kind of inner voice do you walk around with? What does your inner voice sound like? What's the style? It's a good question. if you don't realize If you don't really think about it, you you lose it.
00:00:28
Speaker
It's like a dream. like I don't have a reference right now that that i I can point to, but i don't i don't think I don't feel like it's any different than than my normal like thought. it's It's just like thought.
00:00:40
Speaker
I don't know. It's not a great answer, huh? you Do you want to start over? that i Did I fail the intro? ah You did all right. What what do you mean? like oh is it ah Is it an actual voice that I hear? like It's a different voice, or is it a panic or anxiety or like...
00:00:57
Speaker
or like My inner monologue is what you're asking about. Well, i see I view it as a subset of characters that may or may not influence what you actually are doing and what you actually say.
00:01:12
Speaker
So I have this sort of South Side of Chicago black guy in my head a lot. For no reason, I grew up in white ass Colorado, Aurora, but it's always resonated with me to have like ah that voice. Shit, motherfucker, hell no. It comes up constantly. I don't know if that's something that I internalized with just a mood or a group of friends that built that character. But that character runs in the background and as I'm walking through the world and looking at stuff. And that's not something I say out loud.
00:01:50
Speaker
Does he speak to you or like through you or to you in that voice thinking? Or is it like, hey, Lance, what's up? It's just a shit talker. and So it's somebody that sees the world and goes, fuck these motherfuckers.
00:02:08
Speaker
Constantly. And it's ah it's a big persona and inside my head. when um It comes out. No, not necessarily. it's just It's comedic almost, but it definitely gives permission to be critical of things I don't like.
00:02:24
Speaker
it's so It's a weird inner voice. It's useful, but it's it's it's definitely, I'm not gonna say I cherish it, because that sounds weird, but it's prominent.
00:02:37
Speaker
I don't have a character, so to speak. But I have a negative... Something negative in there, usually. It's negative? Yeah. Like how?
00:02:48
Speaker
Like the same kind of idea... What you just said about what are these fucking idiots doing? Or I got to deal with this again. Or that. Like there's a lot of that going on. And then I've lately been reminding myself that everything always works out. So don't worry about it. Like ah that's my other... Maybe it's a...
00:03:04
Speaker
id

Managing Negative Inner Dialogue

00:03:05
Speaker
ego thing or a yin yang but um'm but i'm my it's like my more ah the voice that's actually mine is like trying to correct the other or I don't know which one's which but one voice is trying to correct the other one does that make sense?
00:03:16
Speaker
Yeah but neither of them have do they have any character to them or any? Nothing spicy dude. So it's just you it's effectively you It's like a tired version of myself versus a fake upbeat version of myself or something One I'm just like ah fuck you know like ah Like that sort of apathetic teenager, something like that. was just like, I wish I could just sit around and nothing.
00:03:42
Speaker
That guy is around a lot versus, oh, shit, there's another problem. I can't believe this is happening again. And then there's another one that's like, shut up. Everything's fine. You know it's all gonna work out. It always does.
00:03:55
Speaker
So don't worry about it. That one's like got the weakest. That one's weak, you know? you know so He's a weak ass bitch. He's not very good at convincing the other ones.
00:04:07
Speaker
and then he And then it's like, it's it's not like, see, I told you so. It's always like, man, how did you fucking let, why did you waste another day worrying about shit? Like you did it again. That's a very condescending guy.
00:04:20
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, but it's just like, no, but it's kind of like, all right, take note, take note. You did it again. You worried everything worked out fine. You figured it out or someone figured it out. And then I'm like fighting to be like, keep that.
00:04:33
Speaker
Like, that's the right attitude. But its you can't keep that. I mean, it's like, a I don't know. I think everyone probably, there are people that you see that are like pretty chill. and They're like, yeah, I think everything's going fine. But there is that voice of like, ah, fuck. Like, that that creeps in way too much, at least for me.
00:04:49
Speaker
It's getting better with what I've gone through the last few years. but it's definitely not a black dude from Chicago or mine's a, unfortunately mine's like a Klansman from Alabama. It's terrible.
00:05:00
Speaker
have to deal with this redneck who I can barely hear cause I have a sheet over and the boys has a sheet over its head and it's not racist. It's just like the idea, it just comes up with ideas of what that person would would would live like, so.
00:05:15
Speaker
Okay, God damn it. He's got, yeah, no, no, I have it. So I have, but it sounds like yours are to like, I don't know, mine is more of like to view the world. yours Yours seem like they just beat up on you.
00:05:27
Speaker
So I have that guy and then I have like this playful childlike thing since my childhood was robbed from me. I have to like recreate that childlike mind and that playfulness. So I have a voice like that.
00:05:40
Speaker
Like Michael Jackson. That repeats stupid stuff. to just, I wonder if that's my soothing voice, like yours that's like. Is it a children's voice or your voice when you were younger?
00:05:52
Speaker
Like when it comes out, when it manifests out through me, yeah, it's like a little, it's just a playfulness. You know that we mentioned it on, i don't know it's seniors or this, but you mentioned like if you're out running sprints or you ah remember we're talking about walking, like running in a park or some idiot with their dogs in the way or the guys doing weed whacking around you.
00:06:12
Speaker
And it's like this mother, I can't, this fucking dude has to do this right here. ah That's, that's 80% of my inner voice. Yeah, I have a lot of that too. i just, I have the characters. his A black dude from the South side of Chicago.
00:06:29
Speaker
ah That's pretty prominent. The playful voice is prominent. And then i think the core of myself, the sarcastic version of myself is very prominent. Like i'm I'm very expressive. My inner voice is pretty expressive. Like and i allow myself to think whatever.
00:06:46
Speaker
Like i'll I'll ride my, i was riding my bike today and I'll, all in a very bombastic way internally be like da like, damn, that's a juicy ass. That's a juicy ass. And I don't shy away from those thoughts. I think a lot of people just kind of turn it off.
00:07:03
Speaker
I've never, i've A, never been able to do it and and ah B, I've never wanted to do it. Where did like, where did this guy come into your vision? Like when that happened?
00:07:17
Speaker
It was multiple guys. That's a juicy ass. Yeah, I mean, I have a little, you know, this is gonna, this is, I hate to say this and record it, but now I have a little bit of, because I've been doing these stupid open mics, like a little bit of, a I started thinking in bits a little bit, or I started like, going oh, that's funny. My inner inner voice is like arranging things into terrible material.
00:07:42
Speaker
So it's a little bit like, it sounds like that's what you're doing, but you but you have no intention of doing standup, but youre it's almost like a running skid in your head. it It is in a lot of ways, yeah. It's just a a way to amuse myself maybe.
00:07:56
Speaker
Now, the panicked inner voice, the one that influences decision-making more often, yeah, I'm not a big fan. I'm not a big fan. Are you like a worrier or no?
00:08:08
Speaker
Or were you ever? I think you said you were a little bit. I am, dude, but I think my my problem is that I've got ah i' got to fix shit right away. i don't i don't leave things lingering. I don't let anything slip. I think I was was a pretty good project project program manager, but it's also an exhausting way to live. Like I'm a clean the email inbox out.
00:08:29
Speaker
And then once the email inbox is clean and everything's done, and sometimes it's to an exhausting level to try to clean out the day, then I have to like give myself permission, turn off the phone, turn the phone over.

Environmental and Emotional Influence

00:08:41
Speaker
So that nothing new, no new task will intro infiltrate my brain. That's kind of how I worked, which is dysfunctional as fuck. It's also unquenchable, right?
00:08:54
Speaker
Like there's always something that's going to up. Yeah, you you just have to have the discipline to turn the shit off and say, nope, now's the time for something else. But yeah, there's always going to be something else, yes. Yeah.
00:09:05
Speaker
that I mean, that little thing right there, I've i've learned with age and um'm that's what I'm trying to focus on. there's always going to be something else. So don't worry about that. There's something else is what I keep telling myself.
00:09:17
Speaker
It's like, there's wake up, put your chin strap on. Yeah. How do you get through the days where just like, i really don't want to do this. Like I can't talk to another excited motherfucker about a table today.
00:09:31
Speaker
Ah, I don't know. That's good question. i mean, when I'm down there, I have so much, i have so much, ah freedom and, I mean, I just have like, I'll go out, can go outside and walk my dogs and it's always sunny and nice or like, or i have my kids around or people around that I like. like Down there, it's not really an issue.
00:09:51
Speaker
And then up here, I think I just bury it through work, you know? I'm just like, I'm here to grind. Well, let me explore that. You think you'd be more miserable as a person living and where you're living just because of the climate and the vibe?
00:10:04
Speaker
I'd be more miserable if I was in the US or in St. Louis, you mean? come St. Louis versus Costa Rica. Costa Rica, yeah. I don't know. You know, i' I'm kind like a fucking superstar up here.
00:10:16
Speaker
Like everything, everything goes pretty well. Like people are all intrigued by the business. I could still go to like the old, my old comedy clubs and people still respect me.
00:10:27
Speaker
I'm like, it's kind of funny. It's a, it's a big fish in a small pond phenomenon, but maybe not. It's it's maybe not a small pond, but you're like, Yeah, that can be little bit. You're like unique or maybe you're like a blowfish or puffer fish or something you unique. I mean, even just like i have command of the language. I don't have that down there.
00:10:45
Speaker
I'm unique down there and everything. And people are super nice to me and always want to talk to me. But I'm not like, I don't feel like I'm like as much in control down there. Plus, you know, being a parent is not that glamorous and like dealing with life is not that glamorous. So down there I'm like dealing with life shit here. All I got to do is like be part of this company that everyone thinks cool is cool. And then that's about it. You know, it's like not much for me to do. So here. So I think but like right now it's gray as fuck outside and that kind of sucks, you know, like.
00:11:17
Speaker
But I don't know, I never get a bad vibe in St. Louis. People talk shit about it's the Midwest, but I i mean, i could i could be happy I could be happy here, but I'd much rather be down there, like, you know, as far as happiness, pretty not a happiness down there.
00:11:32
Speaker
Back to the inner voice thing, ah and related related to, do you think that the negative inner voice would be more prominent in St. Louis? I mean, I'm trying to remember. I think it was. i don't know. There's something about winter that can you can really go downhill quickly. its Winter in the Midwest, you can just be like, fuck this, dude.
00:11:53
Speaker
You know? and And so, yeah, maybe. But, I mean, I can get negative down there. Don't get me wrong. Yeah, I heard it, bro. Negative boys can come out and and get. yeah I'm fascinated by the few positive things that come from the inner voice and just how much negative comes from the inner voice. Like the only things I can recall that are positive are like looking at attractive women and honestly like nature, scenery.
00:12:25
Speaker
And the rest is more. me fuck this shit. Yeah, but even in that, i mean, i have some, part but even in that like attractive woman, is there anything like, ah you know, whatever, like the analysis of what,
00:12:38
Speaker
if you could if you could hang out with that girl or not, or is it is it just a positive thing? like Or is it like, ah, she's out of my league? None of that negativity creeps in? It's just a ah ah desire? That's never a fact. It's a lustful. That's true. I forgot who I was talking to, bro. Oh, and sports. Sports, too, by the way, is something that I'll appreciate inside in a very positive way.
00:13:01
Speaker
um And I feel like a lot of the rest of it, maybe it's like you said, 80% is... Just shit talking, ranting negative. I can't tell if this is the basis of my personality and this is where you kind of need a neuroscientist or something, but is this who I am or these characters to get me through the moment? It's just

Performance Pressure and Visualization

00:13:25
Speaker
a fucking weird thing to think I don't know, yeah. I mean, I think if you look back at things that were like really important in your life,
00:13:32
Speaker
I mean, I think i i I can think of stuff that happened to me in like stand up or I've never been more nervous. I don't know if it's a if it's a yeah inner dialogue, inner voice or what. but I've never been more nervous, almost like to the point where it's debilitating.
00:13:49
Speaker
But I mean, though, how's it happen? Like I got through it somehow, but i don't know if I got as much out of it as I could. i like i did i had I did this big radio show once and I knew about it like a day or two in advance and I was like, i mean, it was like I was doing the Tonight Show. At the time, it was like a pretty important show where like people, if people got on the show, they they got like a ah big reach.
00:14:11
Speaker
And if you got invited it back and, uh, but I talked to other friends that were They were like, I know, yeah, I've never been more. Actually my friend, he now is the one of the hosts of this show. It's like a nationally syndicated show. And he was like, yeah, I w I've never been more nervous in my life. You hear people say that all the time, like their first tonight show set or a movie or, so or, you know, whatever. Yeah.
00:14:30
Speaker
So what was the inner voice though ahead of that? I don't know. and Like, I don't even think there was voicing anything, like good or bad. It was just like ah this sense of, nervousness. I don't know like how to describe it.
00:14:43
Speaker
I get it now. I still get it now, like at these open mics or Yeah, yeah. In my head, I'm like, oh, this is awesome. I'm like, why am I there's a reason I'm nervous. I feel like it's a good thing. Or there's ah yeah there's a reason I'm anxious. There's reason why it's so important, and it's not important.
00:15:01
Speaker
If you saw what the shows I've been performing on, be like, I think you can chill out, bro. It's all good. But it's cool. It's like we don't feel that anymore. Maybe that's a good thing.
00:15:12
Speaker
but ah But then, you but then ah you know, you get wrapped up in like that that's all external and it's all bullshit. It's like the same as like financial success or anything else where you're like, ah but, but I don't know. I don't know what that is.

The Anonymity of Online Threats

00:15:26
Speaker
It's an inner voice or what, but um you know, you were constantly trying to overcome that. Any, any performer or anything, you know, people get it for, for like you used to lead work, work speeches or whatever. And people that, that would frighten the fuck out of so many people.
00:15:41
Speaker
yeah Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So there's moments in life where, Your emotions- You don't have that ever? oh of Of course I do. Of course I get nervous. I just don't characterize that emotion with the inner voice necessarily. I'm not just like, oh, you can't fuck this up. yeah Or in the black eye. Hey man, you can't fuck this up, motherfucker. You fucked this shit up. going to look like a fucking fool, man. He's like a prison roommate.
00:16:05
Speaker
He's like ah your prison roommates. Like what you doing? Yeah. yeah yeah but No, I don't have the inner voice in those moments. um I guess it's just a, well, I don't notice it. Maybe that's the problem. Like you can't notice it.
00:16:22
Speaker
And it's just emotion spiraling out of control. But yeah, I've been, I'm a nervous Nelly for performances for sure. Even an open mic, call I'll get a little freak out right when I lay the guitar on my leg.
00:16:35
Speaker
i I get like I've got to do I have to something funny. i happen like so I have to say or do something funny. And then I start thinking of shit. Like even even I'll sabotage my own act because I've got to do something funny in the moment. So I'm sitting there watching the comedian before me to see if there's like a callback or some shit I can make fun of instead of just going up there and doing my material.
00:16:56
Speaker
maybe Maybe that's a lack of confidence in my material. Maybe that's what I've come to like be good at, and so I just keep doing it. doesn't sound like an inner voice. It's just a compulsion. Yeah, well, I don't know what the inner... I mean, you're a black inner voice. I don't have that, this running dialogue. You don't have that at all?
00:17:13
Speaker
Inner voice is just your thoughts, isn't it? Yeah, but there's a character to it, for me, at least. But do you believe in all that visualization shit and like seeing yourself do something good and all that crap?
00:17:25
Speaker
you believe in that? Like an athlete, like a snowboarder might see his half-pipe around in front of him or ah or someone who... comedian might see himself doing good, sad or fuck. I don't i don't even know, but do you believe in that?
00:17:37
Speaker
To the extent that that it calms you to ah be at performance ready, yes. But the real time events are always different.
00:17:48
Speaker
And like you wanna be as an athlete, you wanna be ready for that. And so being calm and and collected and focused is what you're after, I think in those visualization moments. So, but no, I don't think that the secret is something like,
00:18:03
Speaker
will yourself to the success. I envision myself winning and God is on my side. Like, I can't stand that shit. Like, no, God doesn't give a fuck if you win, dude. Well, yeah, but there's not just religious. There's ah there's like sports psychologists that are making a living off of telling people to visualize success and all that kind of crap. don't know if it's voice, but- i That's probably old older school. I think it's more around um resiliency resiliency and leaning on your training and things like that. But did you you have noticed, I would imagine you have noticed how many athletes are religious, have crosses on their calves and their fucking arms. and that i don't I can't say that I've ever seen that.
00:18:48
Speaker
I never know with you because you're so apart from the real world. or you it just you come ah You come off as like, you have to admit. It sounds like you're telling me that i have to admit, like like I'm denying it Like i'm sitting there going, that's what I'm saying. I don't know with you, dude, because I texted you lot yesterday or two days ago or something about, mean, you've heard was about a bit that about online death threats and how they're slung around and you're like, wow, that really happens? Yeah. Yeah, what is that, by the way? Online, i don't want to get sidetracked, but yeah, no, that, in that instance, that was not sarcasm. I was like, really? This is a, so this online death threat thing is actually like a real thing? People are like, I will fucking kill you just like, hey, what's up, bro? I'll kill you. is it like, i'll I know where you live.
00:19:32
Speaker
I'm sure there's a range, but. i I feel like I have to just yell, of course it's real. ah But it's beyond online. I mean, I think some of these people, these MAGA freaks will send letters and do other things like that. ah But we don't need to get into the the political side of it. yeah, no, it's a commonplace type of activity these days. And it has been for years.
00:19:55
Speaker
But yeah, that's what i'm this it's worse. you're You're basically what you're leading me to believe what you're describing is there's an uptake and death threats because people can hide behind. ah They don't have to do it face to face or something like that.
00:20:09
Speaker
Of course. Like if you're anonymous and somebody pisses you off, it's sort of like a teenager losing their shit. and I'll fucking kill you, bitch. I know where you live. Saying stuff like that. I mean, that's that's a death threat.
00:20:22
Speaker
it's By the way, right yeah. Yeah, go ahead. no but I was just going to say, you were like, i I don't know if you're sarcastic or not. Your suggestion about the death threats was like how I could work it into a bit.
00:20:32
Speaker
So who doesn't know who's being sarcastic? you are You were saying that I should find humor in it, these death threats. No, I think it would be funny, because then you could you could, you know, punch it up as you say, you comic say. But the one of the bits about it would be like, if you could,
00:20:50
Speaker
you had a de-anonymizer. It's the way to to remove anonymity in their app, if you had an app to to do that, and you could just like respond in a chat.
00:21:01
Speaker
Hey, Charles Dobson at 5, 8, 13, Feather Lane Way or whatever, and and just freak this fat piece of shit who's sitting behind a screen out. That'd be a great app, but you could do a bit on something like that. and and so forth so on. I am a great comedic writer.
00:21:19
Speaker
You like like ah a YouTube comment? and It's like, I thought the drums were a little heavy and that on that song. And then you you're like, whatever. Hey, summer of 69, 34. you ever talk about the drums that way, again, ah I will follow your kids home from their elementary school and and burn them alive.
00:21:38
Speaker
It's not far Just even the language that I saw in a chat room of like a very moderate type of podcast was like, I hate this host, um but this episode was okay.
00:21:51
Speaker
Like the word hate, it's so extreme. That person would never be able to look that that host in the eye and be like, I hate you, but that was a good episode. Because the host is probably a nice guy if you run into him at fucking Panera. He's an incredibly, well, he's his whole shtick is nice anyway. I'm not saying any host. Like if you met Rush Limbaugh and fucking Panera, you think he's going to like, fuck you, liberal pussy Lance. He's just going to be like hey, how's it going?
00:22:19
Speaker
Right. Right. Yeah. Right. Now. Although I wish he would fucking call you out. I wish. Is it related to the inner voice? Maybe, now that i'm I'm thinking of how to bring the two together. That is a place where you can express yourself.
00:22:36
Speaker
In inner dialogue, you can be insane. Well, I think that inner dialogue that we suppress when you're in that online sphere just comes out. And you're like, fuck you, you fucking whore, bitch. I'll fucking kill you and your mom. This is the shit people are saying back and forth.
00:22:53
Speaker
um and they just trash human beings. And none of them would have the balls or probably even the antisocial behavior to talk like that to somebody in person. There are a few, of course, that that would.
00:23:04
Speaker
But it's an interesting world that you could turn into a comedic bit or you could ponder it and think about what it's doing to society, Matt. I think, but I think that might be, you know, you're always talking about I'm behind the times. It's already been discussed. Like it's ridiculous that, don't know, that we tip everything now.
00:23:24
Speaker
I think this whole thing about hiding behind your online image is probably, it's out. Like people have commented on it a lot, right? Oh yeah. But I think you're taking a step further though. You're saying now it's not just like, hey, I'm passive aggressive. It's like, I'm going to make you live in fear because I might be ah really somebody who who would kill somebody or I might just be full of shit.
00:23:45
Speaker
Well, i don't I don't think you know who you, when you're looking at just a subset of people walking down the street or maybe even the audience at ah at a comedy a show, many of those people have slung a death threat, I'm guessing.
00:24:00
Speaker
And now maybe a half death threat, like you should die, stuff like that, but, and somebody should kill you or something like that. Maybe not a death threat, gray area, but ah But normal people, dude, are slinging these types of comments around.
00:24:17
Speaker
You think? That's weird. Oh, yeah. It's not just the dude in a trench coat with long sideburns. you know, it's just not the weird dudes. it's It's real people walking around.
00:24:28
Speaker
The guy delivering your pizza, whoever. Yeah. I mean, and but who's to say normal dudes? Like, it seems like if you're making death threats, you probably weren't a normal dude.
00:24:41
Speaker
Well, all I'm saying is an an anonymity allows it to proliferate. And I think that that that's the problem. People are allowed to express their dirty thoughts straight away.
00:24:56
Speaker
Anyway, it's an interesting comment. A lot of people are homicidal maniacs at at the at the core. a lot of people you think are, are but you but they're not no i don't hiding behind an online defense.
00:25:08
Speaker
They're not. They're escalating because they can. That's fair. There's no consequence. Right.

Inner Voices and Identity Politics

00:25:15
Speaker
We're at a real crossroads, Matt. Yeah, and that was not sarcasm. I didn't know that this is like... but But is there an uptick in actual murders? Like this sort of... Whoever would be a ah victim, whether it's like a politician or, I mean, I know the that that healthcare CEO got murdered and there's some stuff like that happening, but is there an uptick of like, okay, these death threats are like,
00:25:39
Speaker
yeah I'll answer that question like with no knowledge, but I'll speculate. But that right there, the responses online to that guy being killed, a guy with a family who just worked his way up to be an executive. I mean, maybe he was a piece of shit in terms of his decision making about claims or whatever, who knows, didn't deserve to die, but they were celebrating his death, like real crazy comments.
00:26:03
Speaker
Right. That's weird. Yeah, I think that's the maybe the other side of it that I am kind of aware of is is that maybe not, oh, I'm going to be the one killing, but just the acceptance that that guy was a piece of shit, so it's okay.
00:26:16
Speaker
Like, there's that, right? Yeah, that's weird. um But there has been an uptick in political violence violence, and I have to believe that some of that stems from just online escalation.
00:26:28
Speaker
Or or ah Iranian propaganda much? Yeah, the Jews, the Jews are doing it. There's so much, to watch a documentary on the Manosphere, there's so much like weird blaming the Jews stuff lately.
00:26:45
Speaker
It's quite interesting. Like yeah all Jews, you blame all Jews. Really, all Jews are control of all this stuff. they they're They're really secretly running the world. Really? And only religious people go to those lengths, bud. I just have to say that.
00:26:58
Speaker
This is going to sound naive, but like we tie anything that's happening with Israel as like a Jew thing, right? And like, It's a state. um it's ah It's a country. ah There are Jews there, though.
00:27:11
Speaker
Right. But there's like the three main like religions are all focused on on that yeah that area. There's Christians and yeah Jews and Muslims or whatever. It's a hot bit. But, yeah, it seems like Jewish-controlled state right now. so Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:27:28
Speaker
You know, in some ways we we take an approach to be just very upfront with this podcast, with our language and slightly misogynistic, but apologetic about it at times. But when I hear the kind of stuff that's slung to young people specifically, like your your son's age now, you gotta probably watch what he what influencers he's checking out, but these are some fucked up people.
00:27:51
Speaker
Well, actually, how do you feel about like what's happening since you're going down that path? like it seems like you would be anti, not Jewish, but anti, like sort of backing the Israelis on everything.
00:28:05
Speaker
I do see that, like not not so sort of racist or I don't even know what, if you call it racist against Jewish people, because it's kind of a different thing. It's a faith. But, ah you know, what's what's your take on that?
00:28:17
Speaker
um Like if my kids get some message, like, I don't know why we always align with Israel and everything. We're the only country that does that. What tell them? I think it's a valid point of view based on recent behavior.
00:28:28
Speaker
ah and then And then you just have to sift through the whole smorgasbord of conspiracy theories that are that are out there right now. um While my inner inner in Southern Klansman is trying to make it a bit the whole time, that's what's processing my head. Yeah, he's just there's plenty of those guys that have some wild thoughts. But like the the spectrum is Israel has committed genocide and they've essentially done the evil that the Nazis perpetrated against them. That's far left. And then you've got far right, which is Israel deserves to defend themselves and...
00:29:05
Speaker
in the rapture, Jesus will come back to Israel. Oh, wait, he'll actually like not save all the Jews, but it's really just for Christians. So you have this really biblical, we have to defend Israel at all costs mindset on the far, far right. um The left,
00:29:20
Speaker
that I just described version of it is a little more reasonable in terms of what has recently happened. Um, no doubt, but both at least at the highest level have merit, like they have a right to defend themselves and they maybe went a little too far, but, um, what's quite weird though, like what percent of Jewish Americans are, are, I would say more than 50% are left are a Democrat. Don't you think?
00:29:44
Speaker
look I don't know. i think some of them swung right because they felt like Trump was going to support Israel. And of course he has. He's been slobbing the knob of Netanyahu. I don't think I've ever met a Jewish Republican in my life.
00:29:57
Speaker
60% to 70% of American Jews are are Democratic Party. This is just an AI overview, so it could be wrong. but Seven in 10 Jewish voters are the Democratic Party.
00:30:09
Speaker
Yeah. I would say there's a subsection of them that are moving more towards like that Zionist viewpoint of like expansionary Jewish state.
00:30:21
Speaker
um I don't quite know what I'm talking about, but then also a subset of those people that are just really kind of embarrassed by the government of Israel at the moment. And that's the thing, to separate the government from the Jewish people or the Jewish religion. But there's so many conspiracy theories and so much anti-Semitism and so much like devaluing of human life, like the the fact that you know people don't even care that the brown people in Gaza or in Iran are just getting destroyed and killed. and
00:30:52
Speaker
It's just sad. It's sad. and just think that it's just weird that whatever's happened with Israel might produce a sort of backlash against Jewish people. And

Inner Dialogue in Personal Conflicts

00:31:05
Speaker
generally Jewish people are in the U.S. are more Democrat or liberal. And it seems like I wonder how they feel like the break and ah Israel. is Israel has the right to defend itself versus this is a Republican initiative that we don't align with.
00:31:22
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know. I haven't done a survey, but I'm sure there's one out there. this This got all fucked up, dude. First, it was your black boys from South Side Chicago, and now here we are. Dude, you could have run with that forever.
00:31:33
Speaker
I'm surprised you didn't beat on that a little bit. Back when you were saying that, though, I knew i had this thing kind popping with with work. and I don't know what what that is, that but I get this, like, back to we were talking about. It's not like...
00:31:47
Speaker
I mean, I could describe as like an anxious feeling, but it doesn't seem like a negative. But at that time, whether it was obvious or not, it's like, I know this other thing's happening. It's not like um ah so you know a thing to worry about, but it's got to happen. And that makes focusing on something else hard.
00:32:04
Speaker
Yeah, that's normal. That's normal. In the superior entertainer, I can kind of make you feel like I'm all in. Not really, but other people might. Yeah. yeah think The listener will mind. Yeah. do you Do you get that? like can you do multi Can your brain multitask but like really be in multiple places at the same time 100%?
00:32:28
Speaker
ah hundred percent you Not really. It depends on what it is. But like if something fucked up is happening with some finance thing, like if I got some fraud alert or some shit while we were talking, that would...
00:32:43
Speaker
Definitely flipped me upside down, dude. Dude, I will say this. A a fight with my wife used to crush me. Like fight my wife would would keep me preoccupied. Like I used to go on the road and then I'd be like, it just wasn't, it was just bad.
00:33:03
Speaker
You know, not not like, oh yeah. just like I knew something. it was putting a strain on the relationship and that would make it hard. It's like, I'd almost feel bad about enjoying myself from that point. You ever get that? and then you'd be like, Oh, I can't enjoy myself now.
00:33:16
Speaker
Yeah. It hijacks you. But that talk about inner voice to just the ranting about my, you know, when you have a close relationship, ranting about your wife and spinning over on thoughts and like crafting your point of view or the things you want to say to them.
00:33:30
Speaker
ah Yeah. That's exhausting. And then also like trying to, trying to, uh, sort of beat down their point of view, break it i break it apart and take it down. What's what's like your go-to, is it what you got to understand? Is it here's the deal? Is it, you know, what what's like your setup for this dialogue?
00:33:53
Speaker
Look, like people that say, look, look. Yeah, that's abrasive. i'm I'm kind of an abrasive guy when it comes to that stuff. You're going to think I'm ah alert, alert. I don't remember.
00:34:06
Speaker
but I don't remember what my key... I want to know. One time someone worked with... Do people do that, Lance? Let's see here. Do people even do that, Lance? I've never heard of that. I just don't know what my abrasive fire starter is.
00:34:23
Speaker
What you got to understand is... Like, like, like, like? Yeah, maybe. What are you talking about? that That'll get me wrong. I might say that. What are you talking about? There you go. in your head or for real probably too no i'd probably say that i don't know it's probably you should probably have my my wife on here interview her what's it what does he do to fucking fuel the fire she just pulls out of like a 600 page notebook dude i was slur classics okay
00:34:53
Speaker
I want to get back to you, but I want to talk about me. But last time my son came up, we were watching this Manosphere thing, watched little bit. And i don't know I just, I don't know why, but I was that guy. I was that, I said, but what you got to understand is none of these motherfuckers get any pussy.
00:35:10
Speaker
The people following these guys are all fucking losers. Yeah, I just said that straight up. Was he like, yes, they do, dad. They get theirs.
00:35:21
Speaker
don't remember. what i don't know what that is. Is that a TV show? Like a douchebag. No, it's a bunch of influencers that talk about how women are just there to fuck and clean and um how to like win at life.
00:35:36
Speaker
They're just online, dude. TikTok, YouTube, other platforms. They have huge shows. They make, you know, ungodly amounts of money. Yeah. Yeah. And they, have, they have memberships for how to live your life. So just talk about lifting fucking you being buff, being a ah man that's desirable, treating women like they should be treated.
00:35:57
Speaker
Talking about how, you know, all that shit, all this shit I make fun of lot of stuff. I satirize. But they got the the kid like kids kids your son's age, like they got their attention? Are they popular with that group? i think they're huge, 13 to maybe.
00:36:13
Speaker
they're huge and And not with kids that got shit together, but like, I think all 13, 14 year olds probably are somewhat susceptible to it, but I don't know why I had to like bombastically say none of these motherfuckers get any pussy. It's sort of like using the manosphere tactic to counter it. I don't know, but.
00:36:32
Speaker
Right, right. Yeah. You're like, that's the that's the gauge. Are you getting pussy or not? In my liberal, woke way. Are you getting pussy that goes out and takes on the world by herself without your ass, but she's still giving it up?
00:36:47
Speaker
That's the, that's the gauge, right? Yeah. Yeah. That's the manosphere, buddy. Yeah. don't know about that, but, uh, yeah, I don't know what, I mean, what do I do to fight?
00:37:02
Speaker
I probably internalize, you know, any, anything that psychologists would say you're not supposed to do, hold it inside then explode and whatever it
00:37:11
Speaker
Say more about the exploding. Don't set boundaries and then and then erupt. Be passive aggressive. I'll do that little bit. little sarcasm, a little cold shoulder, not talk. Don't express myself. A little of everything, it sounds like. A little of everything, yeah. All the classics.
00:37:31
Speaker
That's what it's like living with me. Something horrible to live with. Jeez.

Moral Perceptions and Media Influence

00:37:36
Speaker
I will try, I will say, well, maybe this isn't good, but like always work towards like getting the fight over with at all costs. That's probably my issue.
00:37:46
Speaker
So sometimes you don't resolve anything, right? Yeah, but you're a generally amenable person. And it's probably, there's breaking points though for you. Yeah, and it takes two.
00:37:58
Speaker
And if the other person's not, like just doesn't work that way. you're out you're on different pay schedule thanks to the tango you're on a different schedule or it's like all right whatever never go to sleep some never go to sleep in a fight or something like that like people say if i call that yeah some people just gotta give it a week or two weeks or i mean i i think about it and i just want to throw up and i'm like oh god what if i ever what if i was ever back in a situation like that Well, I get the sense you probably will, ah well, at least in your last dynamic, your last relationship dynamic, you would ah you would absorb some dramatic behavior for quite a long time.
00:38:41
Speaker
And then it would wear you down and then you explode. A little bit. But there's there's a little, you know, I can correlate a little bit like ah what's happening in the Middle East where we're like,
00:38:56
Speaker
we as in the United States has started a war, like it or not, for good or bad reason, right? You would say bad. but And then now we're now we're kind of like, why does anyone jump on board with us to defend this this important canal?
00:39:09
Speaker
And it's like, okay, why don't you guys fight? Like, now okay, now you're not going to help us? So it's like, you started this fucking problem. So I think there was a little bit of like, Oh, now you're fighting with me. Oh, you're going to fight? you Now you're fighting with me. Why you fighting? It's like you started the fucking fight and like I just took it, took it, took it, and now I'm fighting, but I'm going accuse the fighting. I think I'm like, I don't know if I'm Europe or the US in this and that situation, but there was a little bit of that. I don't know if i erupted, but it was well, I'm going to rise. I will rise to the occasion, so to speak, sometimes. And then it was like, well, you're fighting. Even my kids, they'll be like, well, you guys are always you were always fighting too.
00:39:46
Speaker
And it's it's really dumb to say, well, fucking, I didn't start it. I never started it. But i felt I feel like that a little bit. But um yeah, I mean, a lot of, you know, your idea, like I never, you ah you you get you get everything out all the time and and get and get your point across. It's probably good in the fact that there's like, everything's out on the table.
00:40:10
Speaker
Yeah, but it stifles the other person. Right. It probably causes some unneeded tension where where like or it's like, what's your fucking problem? Great. You proved your point, Lance. Great.
00:40:21
Speaker
You got it out there. like I will say the uncomfortable thing for sure, dude. And it's not always it's not always meaningful in terms of progress either. Yeah. But yeah, there's nothing left on the table. Like, what do they say? What's the phrase?
00:40:37
Speaker
Nothing left on the table? Nothing left on cover or something like that. I don't know, dude. Nothing left to... Yeah, I don't know. But I but i also, like, there would I'd just be like, is there any... Like, do you have to have fucking problem with anything? Like, can you just let anything go and have a nice night?
00:40:53
Speaker
I remember feeling that way. ah And I mean, not just not in my marriage, not just in my marriage, but with like anyone, like people that are a little more combative, it's like, ah, fuck, dude, enough.
00:41:05
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. Wait, I got the phrase. Oh, go ahead. um Do it now, we got good internet. Don't let any buttholes go left unfucked.
00:41:17
Speaker
Right? Mm-hmm. No, no. Who else in your life wears you down like that though? Cause it sounds like I might, i maybe I do. And like everybody you know, your kids, your friends, you don't have to say names, but- Co-workers. Just negative about what?
00:41:34
Speaker
ah I don't, you like you've walked through life for 50 years, dude. you You have more, there's more fucked up people out there than just your wife. True. True that. There's more people trying to fuck with you.
00:41:46
Speaker
But number one is at home always. Who's trying to fuck with you the most? It's the spouse. And then and then maybe a boss, maybe just people, you know,
00:41:57
Speaker
there There are people that are just fucking difficult. They might even be like good people or, you know, and they're just fucking difficult to deal with and they don't know it. They never know it. They never know it. They get all their wiser. They didn't hide. They're like, yeah, was a difficult person and they see it. But in the moment they're like,
00:42:15
Speaker
And then they find people to justify their actions. So they might have like a weak friend or a weak husband, not weak, but like someone who's more agreeable. So they'll be was I wrong in that situation? Was I? and then And then no matter what, everyone, like a a friend will like, no, I can see where you're coming from. Like just to shut them up in that moment. One person, yeah.
00:42:33
Speaker
It just fuels a fire. You see it all the time. Yeah, I fear that I can be that guy with my wife in particular. Which one? Which guy? the The guy who doesn't know that he's obnoxious and hard to deal with, although I do know, but it's it's more of I'll play a character to get my point across or sort of come up with a metaphor that's so far out and so like, it's not like it's not related. You could you could extrapolate or reverse engineer it, but it's so absurd and dumb.
00:43:09
Speaker
uh that uh the person is just forced to be like ah she knows what she's doing i but i haven't seen you guys in a huge fight but i can see she'll like pat like patronize you a little bit just to fuck with you yeah a little bit but and it'll get you the bank yeah it it always makes me laugh when she does that yeah but uh that's been dealing with your ass for a long enough time like who knows i think that personality though that you described the one that just that there's never really any insight or expressed insight about their own behavior.
00:43:44
Speaker
That's what makes it super hard. So they're not, they're not ever fucking like I'll be obnoxious sometimes. And I think even you'll be obnoxious and then you'll call it out. Right. And they'll, some people just, they don't even see it. I have no concept that they are a pain in the fucking ass. And you're just like,
00:44:02
Speaker
Do you not see how other people have you not seen and witnessed how other people operate in the world and how they talk? Like you have nothing to offer by way of self deprecation or apology or i mean.
00:44:15
Speaker
But that behavior is so encouraged now. Like she's a bitch, but she owns it like she own you own it. You own it. And that's encouraged. It's like be a fucking raving cunt. Have a reality show.
00:44:27
Speaker
be a fucking materialistic bitch. Do that. But she owns it. But she owns it. You know, like, oh, I'm but i'm i'm the worst to customer service. It's like, yeah, girl, do that.
00:44:39
Speaker
it's It's so encouraged in the and the the vanity of life now. Which takes my next point, Lance. I'm thinking about starting a nonprofit. Just kidding, dude. See, that's why I want to do it, just to bust it out, just to bust it out like that on people when they're being vain. No, but ah that that that behavior is encouraged. You're talking about online shit that's a problem, like death threats are obviously, but the idea like I can be a raving bitch or a fucking dick, asshole guy, whatever, or like ah like a real aggressive politician that's just like fucking deal with me. That behavior is is encouraged and rewarded now.
00:45:15
Speaker
It is, but that's because, don't you think that's because of the internet? Reagan. No, I mean, it's not because of Reagan, but it's because of the internet. Yeah. It's because of ah weird, crazy shit gets clicks, makes money, gets attention. So it's, they call it the attention economy.
00:45:32
Speaker
Well, there's a moral shift that's happened. I don't know. and And generally, like now when I'm out up up here and I'm like even doing stand up, I'm dealing with like kids in their 20s and there's a lot of like nice, nice kids. Like we group these these generations into these groups like all the young people have no morals and they're fucked up.
00:45:49
Speaker
But that's not really true. But like, ah yeah, but there's been like a bit of a moral shift on like what's important or what's not important. And that that's just the way it is now, I think.
00:46:01
Speaker
It's just a little weird out there. But what are you for from a ah moral perspective? Like what are you actually for? Because i'm I'm- That's a broad question. Well, I know, but just like give me three things.
00:46:13
Speaker
You're not going accept it. I don't even want to say it because you're just going to blow it off. yes No, I'm not. Well, like I don't know. I need some time or an example. Can you give me one of yours?
00:46:24
Speaker
If we're going three, give me one so I know what what ah ball what arena are we playing in on this question? I don't like, one of mine would be like, I don't wanna dehumanize, like regardless of whether they were are Islamic, a potential threat or whatever, brown, different than me.
00:46:45
Speaker
I just don't roll that way where I think in some even religions that are based on principles that you would think would align with that, there's a justification for that.
00:46:57
Speaker
what's it What would be an act that dehumanizes someone to you? Would it be a- Oh, just- Slaving them? Just- in a Like I say, we're bombing Iran, just inability to understand the mass suffering that that's creating and just talk about, oh, well, the i like Ayatollah was a bad man. They're bad. But, you know, the people aren't.
00:47:17
Speaker
And, you know, the vast majority of people aren't. And there's going to be widespread suffering. And so to not empathize with that or to look at immigrants, as we've said before, or minorities as like inherently...
00:47:30
Speaker
They come from a shit country, so they're shit people. Yeah, taking advantage of of of good old Americans. it's all It all gets a little silly. So that's that's ah a moral stand I'm willing to take. The other one is that- I like that one. the planet I think the planet is actually the sustainability. The planet is should be a top priority for every every human being.
00:47:51
Speaker
um you know Obviously, that's capable and stuff like that. So I have i' have a few others, but- So you kind of go, what do you stand for? And then I think religion kind of explains that for most people, but yet religion has been hijacked in such weird ways.
00:48:09
Speaker
Religion provides the the moral guideline for a lot of people, is that you're saying? Yeah, exactly. They provide the what I'm for. And then it really gets hijacked so that what's most prominent are are very weird, controversial issues.
00:48:24
Speaker
I'm for two janders, your inner voice. I'm for two janders. and for two genders. yeah Male and female. There's only two. is that a moral Is that a morality thing?
00:48:36
Speaker
ah it It can get couched that way. The only thing, the only it's like, I can't even think about it. I think of it now as like, what am i what would I want to teach my kids?
00:48:47
Speaker
Yeah, I mean. like I can't say I stand for what, what I don't know, you what do you call it? The opposite of, or what, conservation or whatever you're, the second point here is about you think humanity should live more sustainably, right?
00:49:02
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. what's like Is there a name for that? I think that's it's just, yeah, you're a conservationist. Yeah. Like I can't say, i i you know you know what I do, try to live a clean life, but like I can't say that's a moral issue for me that I'm like, this is one of my stances. Can you think it's possible to live without any sort of like moral outline to to live by? Because I feel like I do that.
00:49:26
Speaker
No, you don't. Yeah, but I'm not you have like a list. Like you have a list. And I think what you the two things that you just described seems like it influences your day-to-day decisions. you You're probably not going to kill innocent people to make some extra money.
00:49:40
Speaker
I don't believe in murder. It's probably not you. But just because you believe in a sustainable planet doesn't mean that you're ah you're living a perfect life related to it. I just i think that I look at ah things and then maybe it's dramatic for the average person but just like I think it's a real tragedy for humanity that coral reefs are disappearing or there's plastic all throughout the ocean i just yeah or remember that um ah oil crisis in the gulf where the fucking thing blew up and just kept pouring oil into the sea and we they couldn't figure out fix it stuff like that
00:50:21
Speaker
That's like a real tragedy to me. And I don't think it is to other people. They're not, well, you know, so it's not a part of their moral framework. That's your inner voice. It's mine.
00:50:34
Speaker
That redneck is what I described. Yeah. I mean, that stuff, i there's some that have changed in me, dude. Like I have less... Maybe I have like less empathy. I don't know.
00:50:47
Speaker
are like i don't know. Even like watching dogs suffer used to used to kill me. And now it doesn't bother me as much. like an animal that's like in a bad state or something or or like in a shitty living situation. Like when i lived in the hood in St. Louis, all these dogs were stuck outside, like chained up, freezing and fucking terrible, like pit bulls. used to kill me. It used like destroy me.
00:51:10
Speaker
Now i'm like, yeah, it sucks. but Some of that's age. Some of that's just like you know what you can control and you've witnessed some I don't know. You witnessed some sad things and you've seen some tragic stuff.
00:51:24
Speaker
Right. Yeah, maybe that's it. I hope I'm just turned into a hardened asshole. But ah yeah, I mean, some stuff I'm like, I don't know. I mean, maybe you try to separate, like you know that you can't control a lot of shit, so you got to separate that burden from yourself a little bit if you can.
00:51:41
Speaker
But you can't you don't want to get too good at that. You're just like, i'm I've separated everything and i'm oh it's all good, dude. Make money, pound, trim, and everyone else's problem is their problem. Oh, that's the pervading. That's so pervasive right now. ah Yes, you probably do need to have a sleepless night here and there about...
00:52:00
Speaker
the world and how you contribute to it and what's important to you here and there. um But capitalism, just kidding. It breeds it.
00:52:12
Speaker
Yeah, I'm just thinking like we've had you've had moments in your life where you're like, I can't believe ah that's me. Or like, I'm not, you know. Whatever, even even like, of ah oh shit, I'm probably asking, I might be trying to sell something for a little more money than I have to or whatever. And you're like, man, I'm right in it, that's me.