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Some Misconceptions About Hypergamy + State of the Pod
37 Plays2 years ago
The hypergamy gurus have it all wrong about how to marry up. Here's why. Also, updates on the podcast.
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Transcript
Podcast Host Changes
00:00:05
Speaker
What's up, queens?
00:00:06
Speaker
Welcome to the Female Dating Strategy Podcast, the meanest female-only podcast on the internet.
00:00:10
Speaker
I'm Ro.
00:00:11
Speaker
And I'm Savannah.
00:00:13
Speaker
So we wanted to start off this episode with a little state of the pod update.
00:00:18
Speaker
So as people may have noticed, we're down a host, and we've been down a host for a couple of months because of Lilith's departure.
00:00:24
Speaker
We're not sure if she's going to return given the state of her health and some new updates in her life.
00:00:31
Speaker
And we have also, your lovely host here, Ro and Savannah, had some
00:00:35
Speaker
life changes recently that has made it a little bit more difficult for us to do some of the pod activities that we're doing really consistently.
00:00:43
Speaker
Most importantly, like getting regular recording time.
00:00:46
Speaker
And it just has to do with our schedule as well as like being able to do War Room on Sunday.
00:00:49
Speaker
So we are looking at a couple of options and feel free to give us feedback
Fresh Perspectives for Relevancy
00:00:55
Speaker
on this.
00:00:55
Speaker
One of the things that we were thinking of is like to bring on another host and
00:00:58
Speaker
possibly two new hosts either replace Lilith or replace us or one or both of us at least intermittently while we handle some of our more personal things that are going on.
00:01:09
Speaker
It's not really about replacing people it's more that we want to ensure that we can continue to provide a consistent podcast because we know how much it benefits you all you know not to toot our own horn that we're so special.
00:01:22
Speaker
But, you know, we know that the podcast is enjoyed by many of you and also so that the podcast can have a fresh perspective as well.
00:01:30
Speaker
Because I think after almost two, three years of doing this, I sometimes feel like I've become a broken record.
00:01:37
Speaker
At least I speak for myself anyway.
00:01:39
Speaker
And so it isn't just a case of bye guys, see you later.
00:01:42
Speaker
Ro and I, we will continue to work on other really exciting projects behind the scenes.
00:01:47
Speaker
But it's also that, yeah, essentially, like Ro said, our bandwidth is becoming really, really stretched.
00:01:52
Speaker
And we hate, you know, not being able to give you consistent content because that's the least you will deserve, at least for listening to us and for sticking with us throughout this whole thing.
00:02:01
Speaker
Plus, I think we need some new perspectives.
00:02:04
Speaker
I think without Lilith here that, you know, obviously the three of us, we each provided a different perspective, a different type of balance, a different type of nuance.
00:02:11
Speaker
And I think we want to shake things up just to make sure the podcast stays relevant and stays fresh to people who are still out there in the dating scene and
00:02:19
Speaker
have new perspectives, see new things coming on the cultural horizon.
00:02:24
Speaker
So, and there's always the thought that like one or all of us might either age out of the podcast and or like have a life change such that it would not make sense for us to do it as much anymore.
00:02:34
Speaker
So we're kind of looking now to start that transitory process.
00:02:39
Speaker
We want FDS to keep going.
00:02:40
Speaker
We don't want it to go away because again, FDS is an idea.
00:02:44
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It's a brand.
00:02:44
Speaker
It's not really like, it doesn't necessarily just belong to
00:02:48
Speaker
Savannah and I, it's a concept about how to maximize female benefit.
00:02:51
Speaker
So with that, we're looking to bring in someone else who would like to be a guest host maybe for some time.
00:02:59
Speaker
And then if we feel like they're a good fit for the pod and the audience likes them, a permanent host, there is like a weekly commitment aspect of it.
00:03:06
Speaker
So as well as like, you know, if you want to engage with people.
00:03:09
Speaker
So that's just prefacing that, that for people who are interested in the podcast, like it's not like something that
00:03:14
Speaker
you can do once and then kind of bounce.
00:03:15
Speaker
It is kind of a grind at times.
00:03:16
Speaker
So just letting people know if they were interested to go ahead and
Understanding Hypergamy
00:03:21
Speaker
reach out to us.
00:03:21
Speaker
So if you're interested in possibly hosting this podcast, contact us at contact at thefemaledatingstrategy.com.
00:03:28
Speaker
That's contact at thefemaledatingstrategy.com.
00:03:32
Speaker
And just give us your pitch and why you're interested and why you think you make a good host and let us know.
00:03:38
Speaker
So once again, apologies for some of the inconsistency.
00:03:42
Speaker
First of all, we had some tech issues as well.
00:03:43
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So literally, we tried to schedule a couple of interviews and our normal recording software was not working.
00:03:49
Speaker
Yeah.
00:03:50
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They just really hated us for the past eight weeks.
00:03:52
Speaker
We couldn't record for like two weeks either.
00:03:55
Speaker
Yeah.
00:03:56
Speaker
We want to make sure we're getting the kind of quality content you want, but we're also going to try to transition so that we can also work on other things and take care of some more personal things.
00:04:03
Speaker
So sorry, we haven't been able to do War Room, which I did.
00:04:07
Speaker
We sent a message out on Patreon for our Patreon subscribers.
00:04:09
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It's just like, again, have not had the bandwidth.
00:04:12
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And there's going to be some challenges on getting some of the bonus content out for a little bit until we can get some of the scheduling things in order, which is going to be difficult.
00:04:19
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So that's the update.
00:04:21
Speaker
Hope people aren't too disappointed, but we just wanted to give you some transparency about what's going on.
00:04:26
Speaker
So should we hop into the episode now?
00:04:29
Speaker
Yes.
00:04:30
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So today, going back to the requests we've had
00:04:35
Speaker
to cover, I guess, FDS 101 in more detail.
00:04:39
Speaker
So we've had quite a few people say, can we cover aspects of the handbook, which I think is a very good idea, because it's one thing reading the handbook, but it's also sometimes really good to dissect them.
00:04:51
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And I'm a huge fan of being critical of concepts, even FDS concepts, because
00:04:56
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What I think is important with FDS is to make sure that if you are applying any FDS concepts to your life, that it makes sense to you and that you go into everything with your eyes wide open.
00:05:07
Speaker
So everything FDS says, it has its pros and it has its cons as well.
00:05:11
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And to be able to utilise FDS strategies effectively, you need to be able to understand the pros and cons of what you're doing and
00:05:19
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So you can strategize more effectively and mitigate against the cons.
00:05:23
Speaker
So you get the maximum female benefit.
00:05:25
Speaker
So one of the concepts that is becoming increasingly more contested, I would say, is the concept of hypergamy.
00:05:33
Speaker
And this came up a lot on the FDS subreddit.
00:05:36
Speaker
We will link a post in the subreddit that this episode is going to be based off.
00:05:41
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that's basically talking about the concept of hypergamy.
00:05:45
Speaker
For those who are unaware, hypergamy, according to the Oxford Dictionary, is essentially the action of either marrying or forming a sexual relationship with a person of a superior sociological or educational background.
00:06:00
Speaker
Generally speaking, though, when people talk about hypergamy, they really basically mean like marrying up or dating up, not so much just having sex with somebody in a different social class.
00:06:11
Speaker
Yeah, so hypergamy as it's traditionally defined is more or less the Cinderella story, right?
00:06:16
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You get plucked from relative poverty and obscurity into the lap of luxury by a prince charming who has all the means, resources, etc.
00:06:26
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And a lot of women practice, you know, some variation of this, meaning they want to marry a man who has more means of themselves in order to take care of themselves and their families, secure their future, etc.
00:06:38
Speaker
Mm-hmm.
00:06:39
Speaker
I mean, hypergamy is a theory of, you know, mating that's been around for, you know, possibly centuries.
00:06:45
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So, for example, the royal family, our best friends, the royals, do that very well, hypergamy.
00:06:52
Speaker
But it's also done even within different social classes as well.
00:06:56
Speaker
It's not necessarily the Cinderella marries the rich man.
00:06:59
Speaker
It can also be within, you know, social strata that hypergamy happens as well.
00:07:04
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It also contrasts a bit with another theory of mate selection, and that's a theory of assortative mating, which basically says that people tend to date and marry somebody who is in a similar social class and looks class to themselves as well, which I think makes sense because even if we look at the people around you, so look at your friendship group, generally speaking, people tend to be friends with people who are from a similar educational background, who have a similar income.
00:07:33
Speaker
And so that theory seems to make more sense on a day to day.
00:07:37
Speaker
But today we are talking about hypergamy in part because especially on, you know, sugar baby, TikTok and just general social media, I think there are a lot of misconceptions about hypergamy.
00:07:49
Speaker
And there is a lot of talk about the concept, not enough attention being paid to some of the potential pitfalls of hypergamy as well.
00:07:58
Speaker
Yeah, because it's not all sunshines and roses and happily ever after.
00:08:02
Speaker
And I think that a lot of the hypergamy gurus, especially the ones on YouTube that have built their whole career about like dating, marrying up, they basically tell, they tell you how to get into that situation, but they don't really tell you like how to protect yourself.
00:08:16
Speaker
And also meaning like how to snag a rich guy.
00:08:19
Speaker
And a lot of times their advice is just bad.
00:08:21
Speaker
But even if it's pretty good, most of the time it's, yeah, it's nonsense.
00:08:25
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Oh, it's horse shit.
00:08:26
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Because a lot of the times as well, like, no tea, no shade, but a lot of the women talking about hypergamy, they are sex workers or sugar babies.
00:08:36
Speaker
Now, if you're getting paid by a man for sexual favours or, you know, sexual acts or whatever, or being sexually exploited, that's not the same as being hypergamous.
00:08:46
Speaker
at all because your social standing has not changed and if anything it pushes you it essentially pushes you further down the social hierarchy due to things like stigma towards sex workers as well so a lot of the advice that they give is not only nonsensical but it will also it's essentially designed to attract the kinds of men that will pay for sex workers which is not the kind of men that a woman who is serious about hypergamy actually wants
00:09:13
Speaker
Exactly.
00:09:14
Speaker
So sometimes they're just teaching you how to be a high price escort and not actually hypergamous.
00:09:19
Speaker
And there is a distinct and marked difference.
Hypergamy's Impact on Standards
00:09:22
Speaker
So moving on to why hypergamy is beneficial for women.
00:09:26
Speaker
So first of all, FDS 101 is that we don't stand a shame.
00:09:30
Speaker
So if you are a Cinderella looking to find your prince, we would fully encourage you to do that.
00:09:37
Speaker
Because one of the benefits of
00:09:40
Speaker
you know, women striving to have higher standards for the men that they date and that they marry is that competition for mates is only a positive thing.
00:09:50
Speaker
It will encourage men to be better because we've seen where lowering our standards as a female class has gotten women.
00:09:57
Speaker
It's literally gotten us to where the bar is literally in the Mariana Trench.
00:10:02
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Whereas if
00:10:04
Speaker
you know, women were generally striving to be hypergamous, you know, the bar would raise across the field, essentially.
00:10:11
Speaker
And competition for mates is a good thing as well.
00:10:13
Speaker
And it's a natural thing too.
00:10:15
Speaker
You know, men love to talk about what's natural and what's not.
00:10:18
Speaker
But if we believe in a theory of evolution, survival of the fittest, it's only the people with the best genes and the most resources that were able to pass their genes down and reproduce as well.
00:10:30
Speaker
I mean, in theory it should work like that, but sometimes it's just whatever men are the most murderous and rapey, to be honest.
00:10:38
Speaker
In a perfect world, female mate choice would be the primary driver of
00:10:43
Speaker
how men or how the species evolves.
00:10:45
Speaker
But, you know, things like rich men who are very abusive and exploitative of others, basically just being able to do whatever they want, including impregnating women who are below their social class and basically never taking care of those kids.
00:10:57
Speaker
It's the whole, if you ever watch Game of Thrones, actually don't even watch Game of Thrones, watch like any professional athlete, right?
00:11:02
Speaker
Like they have like- Oh gosh, yeah.
00:11:05
Speaker
politicians, any man who's powerful, a lot of them have like a quote, respectable wife.
00:11:10
Speaker
And then sometimes they have secret children, outside children of their marriage, or anything like that.
00:11:16
Speaker
So you just see that there's ways that men behave who are of a social class.
00:11:22
Speaker
And the way that has historically happened, because they have the power to do that is to keep passing things on that way.
00:11:27
Speaker
passing their genes on that way, hoping to hook women who are dazzled by their fame or fortune or whatever they have, but never ever actually taking them seriously.
00:11:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:11:38
Speaker
And I've often said like a lot of the societal norms and cultures such as things like religion, things like marriage, they've essentially removed, you know, hypergamy, I think artificially from the equation because they've basically acted like affirmative action for men.
00:11:55
Speaker
Because if it wasn't for some of these institutions, most men would not be getting a partner, basically.
00:12:01
Speaker
But that's patriarchy.
00:12:02
Speaker
And, you know, people talk about, especially critics of hypergamy talk about how it's not fair.
00:12:08
Speaker
But FDS, we have never maintained that the dating world is supposed to be fair.
00:12:13
Speaker
FDS tends to get, you know, criticized for being like, well, you're not about equality.
00:12:18
Speaker
I'm like, well, no, we're not about equality.
00:12:20
Speaker
We're about equitable outcomes for women and maximum female benefit.
00:12:24
Speaker
If you've been listening to the podcast this long and you still think it's about equality, I don't know what the fuck to say to you because like you're, you're very slow.
00:12:33
Speaker
We don't give a shit about equality.
00:12:35
Speaker
This is a female dating strategy.
00:12:37
Speaker
This is for us to fucking win.
00:12:39
Speaker
I don't actually care about equality.
00:12:41
Speaker
Like let men give a shit about what's beneficial for them.
00:12:44
Speaker
They have been, they will, they are never going to stop doing things that solely benefit them at our expense.
00:12:50
Speaker
Exactly, exactly.
00:12:52
Speaker
And that goes on to the next point I was actually going to make, which, you know, Ro nicely touched on, is that men also practice hypergamy, but it's a lot more socially acceptable.
00:13:02
Speaker
Again, if you step outside and look at the average couple, even just looks wise, you will often find that the woman is substantially more attractive than the male.
00:13:11
Speaker
Then if we look at the stats around university admissions, around income, we are seeing that women are actually doing better than men generally.
Hypergamy Among Men?
00:13:21
Speaker
In education, in the workforce, you know, women are becoming more independent.
00:13:25
Speaker
And so actually, you know, men also practice hypergamy.
00:13:28
Speaker
They often want to have, you know, the best looking women on their arm as well.
00:13:32
Speaker
Just
00:13:33
Speaker
look at the whole concept of the starter wives where these especially male celebrities they will have a wife who is with them at the very beginning when they're struggling and then the minute they make it they ditch her and go for the woman that they really wanted this whole time because they can now get her because they're more famous they've got more money or whatever
00:13:52
Speaker
So men practice hypergamy all the time.
00:13:54
Speaker
And it goes back to this whole concept of fairness.
00:13:56
Speaker
And one thing I've always maintained is that if a guy says that you are not being fair, that's actually when you as a woman are actually being fair to yourself.
00:14:06
Speaker
And you should continue to advocate for yourself in that direction.
00:14:10
Speaker
Because generally speaking, what men tend to define as fair or isn't fair, basically what they mean is, oh, you're not putting my best interests in.
00:14:19
Speaker
you know, first, because they tend to expect that women will put male interests or the man's interest above their own as well.
00:14:26
Speaker
So, you know, so in actual fact, if a guy says you're not about equality or you're not being fair, that's actually a compliment because what he's saying is that, you know, you are not advocating for yourself.
00:14:36
Speaker
And then finally, another point for hypergamy is that as a woman, there are very few, if any, benefits to dating a man who is not doing at least as well as you
Financial Security in Relationships
00:14:46
Speaker
are.
00:14:46
Speaker
And then another reason why hypergamy is also beneficial and I think should be mandatory for all women is that there are very few, if any, benefits to dating a man who is not doing at least as well as you are.
00:14:57
Speaker
I came across quite a shocking statistic earlier on today, which I will link below, in that women who earn more than the men, so they're the breadwinner in the family, they are actually subjected to more domestic violence as well.
00:15:10
Speaker
So there isn't really any social benefit to a woman dating a guy who is not doing at least as well as she is.
00:15:17
Speaker
Doubly so if you are a woman who is planning on starting a family, it's very, very important that your partner well and ensure that they are able to provide, especially if you're planning on, you know, dropping out of the workforce temporarily to raise the children or just generally don't want to be in a situation where you are, you know, the main or the higher earner and you also have to look after the kids as well.
00:15:39
Speaker
And so there just isn't really any social benefit to women not trying to, I guess,
00:15:45
Speaker
you know, date up, so to speak.
00:15:47
Speaker
But I don't even like using the term date up when it comes to women, because even the richest man, they still benefit from having a woman on their arm in a way that isn't the same for a wealthy woman, just having a guy on her arm.
00:16:00
Speaker
Do you know what I mean?
00:16:01
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, the thing with men is like, you can see the difference between like when women get very wealthy and when men get very wealthy, like men want to have like a collection of women and women basically get wealthy so that they can set boundaries in place about how they deal with men.
00:16:15
Speaker
So it's like the opposite in some respects.
00:16:18
Speaker
And a lot of it is because a lot of men don't come with a lot of benefits outside of financial.
00:16:24
Speaker
And the men that do have the financial means, if they can't pull pussy, nobody cares,
Critique of Hypergamy 'Gurus'
00:16:29
Speaker
right?
00:16:30
Speaker
Yeah, that's true.
00:16:32
Speaker
That's like the sad part about being a man.
00:16:34
Speaker
It's so true.
00:16:35
Speaker
Like you could be extremely wealthy.
00:16:37
Speaker
I mean, look at some of the tech geniuses, we'll say quote, quote, and heavy, heavy, heavy quotation marks.
00:16:44
Speaker
But like some of the heads of the tech industry are places, you know, where they're clearly they're billionaires, multi billionaires, and nobody really thinks these guys are cool, right?
00:16:52
Speaker
They're more or less like they
00:16:53
Speaker
went to the right schools.
00:16:54
Speaker
They're very smart.
00:16:55
Speaker
They capitalize an opportunity at the right time.
00:16:58
Speaker
But I mean, no one looks at Elon Musk and thinks he's like sexy, right?
00:17:03
Speaker
At least I hope not.
00:17:05
Speaker
Well, it's like nobody looks at Mark Zuckerberg and thinks he's like sexy, right?
00:17:09
Speaker
So literally most of these Silicon Valley fucks are paying for it.
00:17:13
Speaker
This come out multiple times that a lot of these guys who are these super nerds, they come out of these Ivy League schools or even elite schools, but
00:17:21
Speaker
And they have all the money, they have all of the generational wealth, some of them, and even that's not enough to overcome their just rank unattractiveness to women.
00:17:29
Speaker
So they pay sex workers, right?
00:17:32
Speaker
So a lot of the biggest clients of sex workers and a lot of sex workers who have said that they've made comparatively a lot of money specifically service that clientele, right?
00:17:41
Speaker
Because of the fact that they're just like these massive fucking geeks who...
00:17:44
Speaker
Yeah, women don't really want to fuck them.
00:17:46
Speaker
Women will fuck them for money, right?
00:17:48
Speaker
But they're not the type of dudes that like women would throw themselves at if they saw them, right?
00:17:53
Speaker
It's totally different than like a pro athlete, for example, like where a lot of those guys are fit and handsome, right?
00:17:59
Speaker
If you look at a soccer player, a football player, a basketball player, I mean, they look physically fit.
00:18:06
Speaker
A runner, you know, a swimmer.
00:18:08
Speaker
Something that would make a woman, like, look at them and be like, oh, he's totally fuckable.
00:18:12
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:18:13
Speaker
Having, like, pasty skin, vitamin D deficiency, and, like, bulgy eyes because you only drink coffee all day and, like, yellow-stained teeth while sitting behind your laptop all day is not making women want to fuck you.
00:18:24
Speaker
And it's just true.
00:18:25
Speaker
Yeah.
00:18:28
Speaker
Those guys are the guys with all the money, but they're also just not that attractive.
00:18:32
Speaker
Yeah.
00:18:33
Speaker
And even someone like Zuckerberg, I can totally see him just not being taken seriously if he wasn't married with kids.
00:18:41
Speaker
And even though he is actually married with kids, he recently posted a picture of him and his family, Priscilla.
00:18:48
Speaker
And Priscilla is...
00:18:49
Speaker
average looking and I don't think it's a bad thing to say someone is average looking most people are average looking and he would just absolutely clown like it's just you know so can you imagine if he didn't have a woman at all like people just wouldn't take him seriously or other men wouldn't take him seriously as a man even though he's literally one of the richest people in the world
00:19:07
Speaker
Yeah, it's interesting because, I mean, I don't think there's anything wrong with me.
00:19:13
Speaker
She's average.
00:19:13
Speaker
I'm average.
00:19:14
Speaker
Like, I'm average looking.
00:19:16
Speaker
But she's still better looking than him.
00:19:18
Speaker
That's what kind of kills me about this entire exchange.
00:19:20
Speaker
It's like, they're acting like, oh, I can't believe his wife looks like that.
00:19:23
Speaker
I'm like, I can totally believe his wife looks like that.
00:19:24
Speaker
She still looks better than him.
00:19:26
Speaker
Like, looks wise, he's still married up.
00:19:28
Speaker
Yeah, that's true.
00:19:28
Speaker
She's still married.
00:19:29
Speaker
She's still better than him.
00:19:30
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:19:32
Speaker
Financially, obviously she married up, but also I think she's a doctor, right?
00:19:35
Speaker
So she's not a slouch and she's not like an idiot.
00:19:37
Speaker
She's not someone who like needed Mark to be successful in life, right?
00:19:44
Speaker
No, she was a doctor.
00:19:45
Speaker
Like she's got like two degrees, like two PhDs or something like that.
00:19:48
Speaker
She's...
00:19:49
Speaker
highly successful in her own right as well i'm more or less looking at the critics like this who first of all just kind of don't get that nobody in mark zuckerberg's circle who is of similar wealth is going to fuck not even of similar wealth anybody who had money is going to fuck mark zuckerberg just for the money because he's just not cute and he's weird right i don't say it's impossible for these guys to get laid or anything because it definitely is not especially
00:20:13
Speaker
There's just more than enough women who are money motivated who will like pretend to like these guys, but like on some level they know that and they resent those women.
00:20:20
Speaker
And that's why it's really, really hard to be hypergamous in the way that a lot of these gurus teach you about like, oh, just flatter his ego or like be the type of feminine woman that a man wants is that a lot of these guys like they have some self-loathing when they feel like they have to pay for it, even if.
00:20:35
Speaker
Yes.
00:20:36
Speaker
Yeah.
00:20:37
Speaker
Could he get a better looking woman?
00:20:39
Speaker
Yes.
00:20:39
Speaker
If he's willing to pay up, will she have the same qualities that likely his wife brings to the table?
Class Mobility Challenges
00:20:45
Speaker
Probably not.
00:20:45
Speaker
Like if she's of similar intelligence has like, you know, any type of pedigree herself, she might look at someone like Mark Zuckerberg, like, yeah, okay.
00:20:53
Speaker
If she was really, really money motivated, but like most women are going to balance him being physically repulsive and having to fuck him for the rest of their life.
00:21:04
Speaker
Imagine if you were like, you get married for the money and then for the rest of your life, you got to pretend to want to fuck this guy.
00:21:09
Speaker
You know what I'm saying?
00:21:11
Speaker
Yeah.
00:21:12
Speaker
That's why a lot of women wouldn't do it.
00:21:14
Speaker
And that's why a lot of women, they get to a certain level of wealth and they're like, okay, how much money...
00:21:18
Speaker
they have to make trade-offs between attractiveness and money, right?
00:21:21
Speaker
And most women try to find the guy they most want to fuck who's, like, within their social class, right?
00:21:26
Speaker
Because, like, if you go up in social class, sometimes you have to date down in looks and, like, that is sex work.
00:21:32
Speaker
That is literally a chore in a job.
00:21:35
Speaker
So... Just look at William and Kate.
00:21:37
Speaker
Even look at Harry and Meghan.
00:21:38
Speaker
Like, the looks match just isn't there.
00:21:41
Speaker
Let's be real.
00:21:42
Speaker
I mean, to be fair to William and Kate, it maybe was there once upon a time, but it's certainly not there now.
00:21:47
Speaker
But yeah.
00:21:48
Speaker
Kate probably still finds William attractive based on like legacy vibes, like before the hairline went, back when he was pretty cute.
00:21:55
Speaker
He had like a couple of year run and then he got married when that luck ran out.
00:21:59
Speaker
Back when he was Diana's son, yeah.
00:22:01
Speaker
And then he just turned into Mountbatten, Windsor, Saxe, Cobra, Gotha.
00:22:05
Speaker
Even all of his rumored mistresses are very like average, right?
00:22:09
Speaker
Even then it's not, even with all his power and wealth, it's like, there's not like just scores of women who are even Kate's level of attractiveness who want to like sign up for that.
00:22:19
Speaker
Oh no, no, not at all.
00:22:20
Speaker
Like, and in fact, it was, as I've touched on before, like William, Charles, Harry, they struggled to find girlfriends.
00:22:27
Speaker
because no one wants to deal with them.
00:22:29
Speaker
So even their money oftentimes can't save them, which is why basically Charles had to settle for Diana.
00:22:34
Speaker
And I mean, settle in like the, in the royal language, not that he settled for her.
00:22:39
Speaker
She was way out of his league anyway.
00:22:41
Speaker
William dumped Kate like randomly around 2007 and went back to her because nobody else wanted him.
00:22:47
Speaker
And like Harry quickly married Meghan.
00:22:49
Speaker
And it's because these guys know that even with all their money and power, they're still not wanted by the sorts of women that they want.
00:22:56
Speaker
Like,
00:22:57
Speaker
they are rejected in their own social class, if not social classes below them, because they just come with so much baggage.
00:23:03
Speaker
And I guess like, you know, the looks and the money isn't enough to save them either.
00:23:07
Speaker
So I feel like that's, yeah.
00:23:09
Speaker
And I don't feel like that is unique to the royal family.
00:23:12
Speaker
I think that,
00:23:13
Speaker
In general, people of a certain social class tend to marry within their certain social class.
00:23:19
Speaker
And if they're marrying down in class, it's usually because there's something wrong with them such that women of their own social class are not that interested.
00:23:28
Speaker
And also, it just goes to show that even men who marry down in quotation marks, they still massively benefit.
00:23:34
Speaker
So if we use the Royal Family as an example, right, you know, Charles massively benefited because he got an heir and he was able to basically, I guess, cement his, you know, next status as king, because the last thing they would have wanted is to have an unmarried bachelor as potential king of England.
00:23:53
Speaker
Like same with, you know, William and same with Harry.
00:23:56
Speaker
Like, you know, the marriages that they enter into with these women, it almost seeks to legitimize their position in the royal family.
00:24:03
Speaker
And they massively benefit from that.
00:24:05
Speaker
I mean, even Harry's friends knew that he was punching with Meghan because they were like, you know, how did you manage to get her?
00:24:11
Speaker
Like people say that, oh, you know, she's now royal.
00:24:14
Speaker
She should be grateful.
00:24:15
Speaker
But it honestly seems like he married up like way beyond what he should have married into.
00:24:21
Speaker
Yeah, I think everyone was like, wow, what a miracle you pulled her.
00:24:25
Speaker
But when you look at Meghan Markle's dating history, it seems like she likes guys that are, I mean, like when I look at Harry, he doesn't look significantly less attractive or even more attractive than the men she's dated in the past.
00:24:36
Speaker
So I think that's just her lane.
00:24:37
Speaker
That's just kind of what she likes.
00:24:39
Speaker
So he lucked up.
00:24:40
Speaker
Yeah, 100%.
00:24:41
Speaker
And even though she is older than him, she looks younger than him by quite a few years as well.
00:24:47
Speaker
So anyway, that's my little royal insertion.
00:24:51
Speaker
And the next half of this episode will focus on the common pitfalls of hypergamy, because whilst I don't think it's a bad thing, especially if you are a working class person,
00:25:00
Speaker
woman or you come from a working class background or you come from a background where you aren't from the class that you are trying to get into, it's really important to be aware of certain things.
00:25:12
Speaker
So the first one is that, I don't know how it is in the US, so correct me if I'm wrong, but in the UK we have a very, very rigid class system.
00:25:21
Speaker
And it is very, very difficult to actually meaningfully change your social class.
00:25:26
Speaker
People think that if you marry somebody in a different income bracket, you are automatically in a higher social class.
00:25:32
Speaker
And I disagree with that.
00:25:33
Speaker
Like when it comes to the class system, I will admit I have quite a Marxist view on things, which people might disagree with.
00:25:40
Speaker
But essentially, I just feel like just because you earn a lot of money, that doesn't necessarily mean you are in the middle or the upper classes.
00:25:47
Speaker
That's just not how class works.
00:25:49
Speaker
especially if you didn't come from money originally?
00:25:52
Speaker
Well, I think it's the difference between the UK, which is an extremely old country versus the US, which is a relatively young country.
00:25:59
Speaker
So I think because we're relatively young, we don't have as many like quote old money type of
00:26:04
Speaker
entrenched social class system.
00:26:06
Speaker
So I think the way that it's thought of in the States is more like A-list, B-list, C-list.
00:26:10
Speaker
That can change based on the whatever sphere you're working in.
00:26:15
Speaker
But I wouldn't say the classes are nearly as rigid as Europe.
00:26:20
Speaker
In fact, I wouldn't say it is at all.
00:26:22
Speaker
And that being said, like there is, we do have some old money type people, but at the same time, like an A-list person is an A-list person.
00:26:28
Speaker
For example, like
00:26:29
Speaker
If a list in like sports would be Tom Brady, LeBron James, trying to think of someone else.
00:26:37
Speaker
And then in music, it would be like a list in music would be like Beyonce or Rihanna or Taylor Swift or trying to think of a man.
00:26:48
Speaker
Who's an A-list musician?
00:26:49
Speaker
That's a man.
00:26:50
Speaker
I'm maybe losing it right now.
00:26:51
Speaker
But someone who's been like very, very popular for a very, very long time and very, very established.
00:26:56
Speaker
And then in the political circles, obviously, it's anybody who served in the White House would be A-list.
00:27:02
Speaker
But a lot of those people have like working class backgrounds and then work their way up.
00:27:06
Speaker
But a lot of people in those spheres have working class backgrounds and then work their way up.
00:27:10
Speaker
There's a second sort of class structure in the United States and it's very educational related.
00:27:15
Speaker
There's a class system in the United States that's stratified by education.
00:27:20
Speaker
That is not immediately apparent.
00:27:22
Speaker
But one of the things that's been very controversial right now when it comes to like elite school admissions is how much of elite school admissions come from legacy admissions, which is people who come from people who are major donors who had parents or great grandparents who attended that school.
00:27:38
Speaker
And a lot of that is that's sort of an entrenched class structure where, yes, they allow people who are very, very smart, but like the vast majority of admittance have some kind of connection to the Ivy League already.
00:27:49
Speaker
So meaning my father went to Harvard and my father's father went to Harvard, etc.
00:27:54
Speaker
And even though their kids are dumb as fuck.
00:27:56
Speaker
And probably could never get there on their own merits.
00:27:58
Speaker
They're sort of ushered in because they want to kind of keep the elite want to date the elite, they want to give jobs to the elite, they want to keep that class structure going, they want to have certain soft skills that are only present in their little enclave of culture.
00:28:10
Speaker
So and that's
00:28:11
Speaker
In that respect, it can be hard because if you're not a person who comes from money, you have to be extremely smart and you have to have some kind of hook to get into one of these Ivy League schools.
00:28:20
Speaker
And then from there, you have to get connections to have the right kind of jobs because even people who have Ivy League degrees, sometimes they've said like, it's been hard for me to get a job.
00:28:29
Speaker
even with my Ivy League degree, because I didn't have a connection, right?
00:28:32
Speaker
So if you majored in like philosophy, once again, like the scrotiest major possible, but let's say you majored in philosophy at like Harvard, but your parents are working class immigrants, you'll struggle to find a job, whereas like a kid who majored in philosophy at Harvard, but his dad is the VP at a bank, right?
00:28:51
Speaker
He's going to have whatever job he wants, right?
00:28:53
Speaker
His degree is solely a piece of paper that they get to justify that he's not a complete idiot, even though arguably it's not the case, and then give them the job that they're already destined to have.
00:29:03
Speaker
So like in some respects, like the university system is supposed to be the equalizer.
00:29:07
Speaker
The university system in the past generation or so, I think with the inflation of, first of all, the inflation of the amount of universities and the amount of cost applications
00:29:16
Speaker
around the universities, that it's really become like a place that rich people send their kids to justify giving them rich people jobs.
00:29:23
Speaker
And it's a little bit harder to be hypergamous or upwardly socially mobile.
00:29:27
Speaker
Not impossible, but like if you don't have already connections, like you basically have to take some kind of degree that's in high demand, like a STEM degree.
00:29:35
Speaker
Yeah, agreed, agreed.
00:29:37
Speaker
And so because traditionally as well, speaking of universities, it actually used to be a way for women to meet men.
00:29:45
Speaker
To marry.
00:29:47
Speaker
It was a thing in the UK where, yeah, lots of, I guess, you know, families, they would specifically send their daughters, especially when back in about the 70s or 80s, when fewer women went to university, it was almost like a running joke that they would pick the universities that were the most male dominated and send their daughters there to get married, basically to find a husband, to do husband shopping, with quite a bit of success, actually, given the number of relationships.
00:30:15
Speaker
Yeah, once again, works really well if you already come from that social class.
00:30:18
Speaker
Like this is where again, the hypergamy gurus sometimes fail.
00:30:22
Speaker
It's like, okay, if you want to be hypergamous, it is always better to try to build your own platform.
00:30:27
Speaker
It is much harder for working class women to do it.
00:30:30
Speaker
So the easiest way I would say quote, is to try to achieve it through education.
00:30:35
Speaker
And it's not even that easy.
00:30:36
Speaker
Obviously, like education is very competitive.
00:30:38
Speaker
And then try to network or rub elbows with people who are
00:30:42
Speaker
are established and, you know, polish yourself such that you can like basically wash off your working class stink and try to network with them.
00:30:50
Speaker
But like just from experience and having seen, you know, who ended up with who ended up marrying who and what and why most of these guys, especially the old money guys, like they married women already in their social class.
00:31:01
Speaker
Like
00:31:01
Speaker
They're very unimaginative in the way that they choose a spouse.
00:31:05
Speaker
And it's partially just like social acceptance of their family, as well as like understanding that generational wealth is built through stability in marriage and shared values, right?
00:31:14
Speaker
Because like if you've just had a silver spoon your whole life, it can be really difficult to talk to people or understand people who don't, especially if it could have been like your dad that completely screwed that person's family over, right?
00:31:24
Speaker
So...
00:31:24
Speaker
Just looking at it that way, understanding like hypergamy is more likely if you put yourself in that social group via education or work experience if you can, but it's also not guaranteed.
00:31:35
Speaker
And it also comes with some pitfalls.
00:31:37
Speaker
And it's also about there's a difference between, because for some reason, a lot of the advice I'm seeing around hypergamy, it seems to center around just being, you know, near rich people.
00:31:49
Speaker
So proximity.
00:31:50
Speaker
So yeah,
00:31:50
Speaker
If you get a job in a gentleman's club or if you go to a golf club or if you hang out at Harrods or, you know, whatever.
00:31:57
Speaker
And it's like, this is not going to work because especially if somebody is in a higher social class, they are very, very good at compartmentalizing people.
00:32:07
Speaker
So they will compartmentalize you into the help and the help is what you will say.
00:32:12
Speaker
And that is how they will perceive you.
00:32:13
Speaker
They're not going to perceive you as one of them just because you happen to rock up to a bar.
00:32:18
Speaker
Because again, like Rose said, when somebody is from a certain social class, they are able to spot when other people are also part of that social class because there will be social cues, especially if you come from a working class background, that you're just not going to know because you don't hang around enough rich people.
00:32:34
Speaker
So just hanging around rich people...
00:32:37
Speaker
It's not the way to break into that inner circle.
00:32:39
Speaker
It's probably one of the worst ways.
00:32:41
Speaker
Like the way to, just like Rose said, the way to actually attempt, not guaranteed, but attempt to break into these circles is if you actually level yourself up.
00:32:51
Speaker
So you have a meaningful reason to be there.
00:32:53
Speaker
So as opposed to being a waitress at the golf club, you know, for example, you get yourself into a position where, you know, you can network with the people playing golf.
00:33:02
Speaker
And that's the main difference.
00:33:04
Speaker
Exactly.
00:33:04
Speaker
But I mean, in some respects, it's tough because the way you almost break in is by anything is really the same way you would do with anything else is like you have to be exceptional in some way you have to corner the market on whatever your skill or expertise is.
00:33:20
Speaker
So in America, it's somewhat flexible to be... Our class system is flexible, but to a point, and it depends on the industry.
00:33:27
Speaker
I feel like there's some industries, the wealthy have basically quarantined for themselves.
00:33:31
Speaker
So like investment banking or...
00:33:34
Speaker
I mean, it's the entire like nepo baby argument, right?
Class Systems in the US and UK
00:33:37
Speaker
Like investment banking, people have said the same thing about like a lot of these positions in the film industry that you have to know somebody or your parent has to be in the film industry for you to break into the film industry.
00:33:48
Speaker
A lot of people have said the same thing about, what's the word?
00:33:52
Speaker
Other like white collar prestige jobs, right?
00:33:55
Speaker
Yeah.
00:33:56
Speaker
If you look at anything to do with like humanitarian causes, like the UN, like,
00:34:01
Speaker
the WHO, diplomatic service, all of these super cushy jobs, you basically need either like a family connection or wealthy parents who can support you whilst you work for free or intern on a very, very low wage to get into those professions.
00:34:18
Speaker
Because if you look at, for example, the UN, they do unpaid internships in places like London and Geneva, some of the most expensive cities in the world.
00:34:28
Speaker
If you don't have that financial background or that social background to be able to basically, you know, live and work for free in one of these cities, it's impossible to break in.
00:34:39
Speaker
literally impossible.
00:34:41
Speaker
And this is why if you look at, because I'm a bit of a loser, like I like to look up the ambassadors for my country, if you look them up, you'll often find a lot of them had parents who were diplomats, for example.
00:34:52
Speaker
It's quite rare that you see a diplomat who's come from a truly, truly working class background and made it to the top of the diplomatic service.
00:35:00
Speaker
It's quite rare, for example.
00:35:02
Speaker
So yeah, that's just something to watch out for.
00:35:05
Speaker
Again, I'm not saying...
00:35:07
Speaker
don't pursue hypergamy, but also be realistic.
00:35:09
Speaker
And if you are a working class girly, you know, like myself, I consider myself to be very, very working class, understand that you need to raise your baseline essentially before you start attempting hypergamy.
00:35:21
Speaker
Because if you don't, you just end up being massively taken advantage of.
00:35:25
Speaker
Because unfortunately, as is a lot of these men that you're looking to target, they will just not take you seriously.
00:35:32
Speaker
And one of the messages that I'm getting really concerned about is these spaces where they are encouraging, you know, basically teenage girls who are 18, 19 and convincing them that if they just say the right things, they'll be able to hoodwink a guy who's two, three times their age.
00:35:49
Speaker
And that's just not true.
Financial Awareness in Wealthy Relationships
00:35:51
Speaker
Because again, it's sort of the blind leading the blind.
00:35:53
Speaker
A lot of the people giving this advice, they've not been in a situation that is genuinely hypergamous.
00:35:59
Speaker
And if they have, even they themselves, they're not fully aware of the pitfalls such as, you know, how to protect yourself financially.
00:36:06
Speaker
So you get the most out of it if it goes wrong, for example.
00:36:10
Speaker
Exactly.
00:36:11
Speaker
And speaking of the financial point as well, you know, let's say you've leveled up and you are now in your hypergamous happy relationship.
00:36:19
Speaker
A lot of women sleep on the fact that you are still very financially vulnerable.
00:36:23
Speaker
A good slash bad example of this is the supermodel.
00:36:27
Speaker
I want to say Paulina Porizkova.
00:36:30
Speaker
I think that's how I pronounce it.
00:36:32
Speaker
She found this out the hard way when she married a guy who was a lot older than her.
00:36:36
Speaker
I think he was a famous rock star and I think they were about to separate or separated at the time of his death.
00:36:42
Speaker
And she basically looked after him like for years whilst he was sick and then he died.
00:36:46
Speaker
And it was only after he passed away that she found out he had basically cut her out of his will.
00:36:52
Speaker
So, and she's done interviews about where she was blindsided and devastated by it.
00:36:57
Speaker
But it just goes to show that even if you are in a relationship, especially if you're in a relationship with a guy who is much wealthier than you are, you know, you need to ensure that your financial interests are protected.
00:37:07
Speaker
Don't assume that these rich men will have your best interests at heart.
00:37:11
Speaker
Because like I always tell women, wealthy people don't tend to become wealthy because they're generous and forthcoming with their money.
00:37:18
Speaker
They tend to sometimes basically be stingy or they know how to manipulate people in situations and
00:37:25
Speaker
in order to be able to financially line their own pockets.
00:37:28
Speaker
That's how they become rich.
00:37:29
Speaker
I'm not saying hate the player because it's the system ultimately, but it is what it is.
00:37:33
Speaker
And so you need to act accordingly as well.
00:37:36
Speaker
So some of the things you can do is if you aren't planning on, you know, working, which I would always say, just like always earn your own income, even if you don't have to be working, but it's always good to have money that only you can access.
00:37:51
Speaker
And that is just for you.
00:37:52
Speaker
But let's say you want to take time out to raise children, then make sure that he is doing things like paying into a private pension for you.
00:37:59
Speaker
Because that's one of the areas, you know, where there's a gap in, at least in the UK, there tends to be a pensions gap where retirement age comes around, there tends to be a huge gap between the amount of, you know, money in the pensions of men and women.
00:38:16
Speaker
And that's purely because when women take time out of the workforce to raise children, they stop paying into their
00:38:22
Speaker
pension so if you are going to stop working the guy should really compensate you for that and be paying into your private pension number one and ensure that you have accounts that only you can access so I remember when I was working in retail banking and I saw a couple and the woman it seemed like she'd won the hypergamy game because she came in and was doing a transaction and
00:38:43
Speaker
And then she was like, oh, my allowance is due today.
00:38:47
Speaker
And I even thought maybe it was like two, three hundred quid from her husband.
00:38:51
Speaker
It was like five grand a month.
00:38:53
Speaker
And she'd amassed like 30 grand in her current account.
00:38:57
Speaker
And I was like, damn, sis, you've won.
00:38:59
Speaker
Because also he was transferring that money into an account in just her name.
00:39:04
Speaker
And that's really legally important.
00:39:06
Speaker
Joint accounts is, you know, open access, like he could drain the entire bank account tomorrow and leave you with nothing.
00:39:12
Speaker
But if it's just in your account, he can't transact on that account, because it's just in your name as well.
00:39:17
Speaker
So that's really, really important to have an account that only you can access and that he's paying into if you are not working, for example.
00:39:26
Speaker
And perhaps I could do a whole episode on this because I've seen this play out in various relationships close to me.
00:39:32
Speaker
Is that there is a difference between a guy paying for stuff for you and investing in you.
00:39:39
Speaker
And I would say the difference is, is he investing or is he paying for something that doesn't directly benefit him?
Long-term Security vs. Temporary Benefits
00:39:48
Speaker
So let's say, for example, your average, you know, sugar relationship, he might pay for you to go on holiday, or he might buy you designer clothes and designer bags.
00:39:58
Speaker
But ultimately, this stuff is really feeding his ego.
00:40:01
Speaker
Because generally speaking, in the sugar relationship, if he's paying for you to go on holiday, he's usually coming with you.
00:40:08
Speaker
He's not just saying, okay, here's 10 grand, you can go to Bora Bora with your girlfriend.
00:40:13
Speaker
So don't say that.
00:40:14
Speaker
Whereas if a guy is investing in you, he'll pay for your education.
00:40:18
Speaker
You know, he'll pay for, I don't know, support you in opening a business.
00:40:21
Speaker
He will invest in stuff that may not necessarily directly benefit him, but will contribute to your own growth and prospects as well, independent of him.
00:40:31
Speaker
So a good example of this is one of my uncles.
00:40:34
Speaker
He's been married to my aunt for well over 20 years now.
00:40:36
Speaker
He paid for her undergraduate degree when he himself was an intern.
00:40:40
Speaker
That's quite common in Nigeria, actually, where
00:40:44
Speaker
men support their wives or future wives through school he paid for her master's and he's paid for her phd as well so even if that relationship was to end she will be able to take those degrees with her and you know make something of herself as opposed to if he just bought her a load of designer bags or you know paid for her bbls or whatever she can't do anything with that ultimately so yes
00:41:07
Speaker
But that could be a whole episode like in and of itself because this episode could get quite dark.
00:41:12
Speaker
I don't really want it to be.
00:41:14
Speaker
But yeah.
00:41:14
Speaker
But those are just some of the pitfalls and, you know, the things to watch out for if you're planning on being hypergamous as well.
00:41:20
Speaker
And I decided to end, to wrap up the episode, with just questioning if...
00:41:25
Speaker
Based on what we know about the average man, kind of looks like Mark Zuckerberg.
00:41:29
Speaker
It doesn't wash his arse.
00:41:30
Speaker
Generally useless.
00:41:31
Speaker
You know, lacks education.
00:41:33
Speaker
Isn't earning as much money anymore.
00:41:35
Speaker
Does hypergamy for women even exist?
00:41:38
Speaker
It does in the sense that like, yes, you can level up your life in order to marry a man who might have been less accessible to you otherwise.
The Reality of True Hypergamy?
00:41:49
Speaker
Right.
00:41:49
Speaker
Meaning like get an education so that you can date other men who are educated, put yourself into the right profession or.
00:41:56
Speaker
location or wherever you want to go with the type of men that you want to date.
00:42:00
Speaker
Like you can absolutely invest in yourself and invest in the life that you want to create and get it by self-improvement and quote unquote marry up, I should say.
00:42:10
Speaker
Meaning like, I guess the question would be, are you trying to marry a guy who also did that?
00:42:15
Speaker
Are you trying to marry a guy who was already born with those things?
00:42:18
Speaker
Sometimes I feel like it's harder to just break into an entrenched social class of people who've always had, but you might be able to put yourself in a different
00:42:26
Speaker
class and meet other similarly situated people.
00:42:29
Speaker
It's not impossible, but I feel like a lot of these hypergamy gurus, like, I mean, have you ever seen some of the old Sex and the City episodes where it's like all these women just dressed to the nines, like going to hang out at bars, trying to get with like finance bros, finance bros who were partners at whatever bank or legal firm or whatever, like,
00:42:44
Speaker
And these guys are probably on their second and third divorce.
00:42:47
Speaker
Their first wife was someone of their social class.
00:42:49
Speaker
Let's keep it a buck.
00:42:50
Speaker
Their second wife might have been that as well.
00:42:53
Speaker
And then their third wife is after they've already been cleaned out by their first two marriages is what you're going to get.
00:42:57
Speaker
Right.
00:42:59
Speaker
It's not that I'm saying that it's impossible.
00:43:01
Speaker
It's just like I feel like a lot of working class girls get slotted into like the sex work track and not knowing it because they believe all these hypergamy gurus keep telling them just be feminine and cute and you know, whatever rest in your femininity and shit.
00:43:14
Speaker
I'm like, girl, if that was all it took, then like, why isn't anybody like it's so much more than that?
00:43:19
Speaker
Because like, it's not even about being like, quote unquote, the total package, but you have to match their social circle, like you have to be able to go into an audience and speak intelligently and not sound like a total idiot.
00:43:29
Speaker
All those soft skills matter, right?
00:43:30
Speaker
Because the thing is, if you don't have them, you'll stick out like a sore thumb in some of those circles and therefore affect their brand.
00:43:36
Speaker
And for these guys, like in order to maintain their power and wealth, branding is everything.
00:43:41
Speaker
Yes.
00:43:42
Speaker
Yeah.
00:43:42
Speaker
But it's really hard to understand those nuances.
00:43:44
Speaker
Like we've talked about this in the career series and the bonus content is that like, listen, there's a lot of things, especially me coming from a more working class background that I just didn't understand about the working world.
00:43:54
Speaker
Quite frankly, I'm never going to be like an old money wasp, right?
00:43:57
Speaker
No matter how much I try to dress like one or act like one or whatever.
00:44:02
Speaker
speak like one at some point there's going to be diminishing returns such that I'm going to try really hard to act like something and someone I'm not and it's going to be so inauthentic and hard to imitate right so you have to find a balance between who you are and then the place that you want to put yourself in so I mean there's definitely financial benefits but like the question then becomes like where's the trade-off right
00:44:23
Speaker
there's going to be a place where you start to feel like there's diminishing returns of like trying to fit into a guy's social circle just to get paid, you know, and, and once again, because like social classes here are a little bit fluid compared to other places.
00:44:35
Speaker
Like there's also women that are trying to like date up with like professional athletes, right?
00:44:39
Speaker
Like the type of women who are basically like Instagram models and actually maybe real like fashion models and stuff like that, their peer group, right?
00:44:47
Speaker
The stereotype of athletes and artists dating and marrying models is fairly true.
00:44:52
Speaker
But you're taking two people who probably don't have education, who are in the entertainment industry, where looks are very, very important.
00:45:00
Speaker
So then like, yeah, they want to date other people who are
00:45:03
Speaker
going to raise their brand.
00:45:04
Speaker
When you look at a lot of them, a lot of them still end up with like women that knew them prior to them being famous, like their high school sweetheart, etc.
00:45:12
Speaker
So even then, it's like hypergamy.
00:45:14
Speaker
It depends on what kind of social circle you want to be in.
00:45:16
Speaker
If you want to be in entertainment, it's one thing.
00:45:18
Speaker
If you want to be in investment banking, it's one thing.
00:45:20
Speaker
If you want to be in tech, it's another.
00:45:21
Speaker
If you want to be in politics, it's another, right?
00:45:24
Speaker
So consider the audience, consider where you want to go, and then who you are, and to the extent that you want to fit into that circle.
Encouragement to Aim Higher
00:45:31
Speaker
So that is our episode on hypergamy.
00:45:33
Speaker
Let us know what you think on this rather controversial in quotation marks topic.
00:45:39
Speaker
Yeah, I think hypergamy is always a good thing.
00:45:41
Speaker
I wouldn't date a guy who is doing, I guess, you know, less than me because what's the point?
00:45:47
Speaker
But yeah, let me know what you think.
00:45:49
Speaker
Yeah, fuck that.
00:45:50
Speaker
Why would you do that?
00:45:51
Speaker
I even take what I said earlier in the episode when I was trying to be diplomatic Savannah and be like, there's very few benefits.
00:45:57
Speaker
There's zero benefit to women dating men who are doing worse than them.
00:46:02
Speaker
Zero benefit.
00:46:03
Speaker
In fact, it's probably a negative, generally speaking.
00:46:06
Speaker
So I said, don't do it.
00:46:09
Speaker
And that's our show.
00:46:10
Speaker
Thanks for listening, queens.
00:46:12
Speaker
Check us out on Patreon, patreon.com forward slash the female dating strategy.
00:46:16
Speaker
Also on the website, the female dating strategy.com and on Twitter at femdatstrat for as long as Twitter lasts.
00:46:22
Speaker
And yeah, let us know what you think about our first conversation of this show about some of the transition aspirations of this podcast.
00:46:31
Speaker
And email us at contact at the female dating strategy.
00:46:33
Speaker
Thanks for listening, queens.
00:46:35
Speaker
And for all you scrotes out there.
00:46:37
Speaker
Just because you have money doesn't mean anybody wants to touch you.
00:46:40
Speaker
Don't be bitter.
00:46:41
Speaker
Just get better.
00:46:43
Speaker
And I'm mad.
00:46:44
Speaker
Facts.
00:46:44
Speaker
Bye.