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The Gervais Podcast: Porky's movie
27 Plays6 months ago
Gervais and Blazen talk about the 80's classic Porky's and if it could be made today
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Transcript
00:00:33
Speaker
Hello, everyone.
Introduction and Topic Overview
00:00:34
Speaker
Welcome to another amazing episode of the Jarvis podcast, part of the nonsensical nonsense network. Today, I'm reviewing the Porky's 1981 movie, but I'm not alone. I got my buddy and friend, Blazin. Blazin, how are you doing, bro? I am doing awesome, and I'm looking forward to doing a review on Porky's. It's been one of my kind of favorites since my adolescent
00:01:02
Speaker
Yeah, this would be interesting Yeah, I mean and you know a lot of those things back in the 80s We're just able to hit on that time It's I always considered porky is one of those Most favored TNA movies from from the 80s so there's a whole genre of TNA movies back then and
00:01:28
Speaker
Definitely,
Impact of 80s Raunchy Comedies
00:01:30
Speaker
definitely. I mean it's so funny how a lot of these raunchy comedies started with Animal House and then in the 80s it was kind of like well they kind of did these movies so let's see what let's see if we could bring them a little bit forward a decade and ultimately go a little bit farther. I mean you had Caddyshack that kind of
00:01:54
Speaker
went a little bit further than some of the movies of those eras in comedy. So I mean, it got to the point where movies were trying to top each other in different decades. Oh, absolutely. I think this movie was around the time. I mean, it was 81 in movies like that. I can't remember when Animal House came out, but I think it was late 70s.
00:02:21
Speaker
It's mid to late 70s, I think. Yeah. I mean, yeah, there's a whole genre of those raunchy comedies that came out around that time that I think a lot of them just became cult classics. So just to name a few, like you said, Animal House, Porky's was one. And unfortunately, nothing else comes to my mind right now, but I know they're out there.
00:02:44
Speaker
Benji, how are you doing? Thank you for joining us today. Hopefully it ain't too much of a shit show. I know. No Saturdays usually is what the open for challenge, but you know, it is what it is. There's my wifey. Hey Alyssa, how are you doing? Welcome to the show. But yeah, as you said, you know, um, with porkies, it's kind of like a no holds barred comedy movie of the eighties.
Porky's: A Cult Classic
00:03:12
Speaker
And I mean, you have Kim Cattrall, you have Bob, it's directed by Bob Clark, who I do believe actually directed a horror movie back in the seventies called Black Christmas, which is really weird how they're like, Hey, we're going to make a really, really kind of newer adaptation of Animal House in a way. We know you did a horror movie, but could you do this comedy movie for us?
00:03:42
Speaker
I mean, I think it shows versatility when it comes to directors and writers when they can, you know, go across genre, I guess. Well, exactly. I mean, and that's why we don't have those directors today. You know, they stick to one genre and then they pretty much are done.
00:04:07
Speaker
Yes. With that one genre. And if they can't make it, they try to go to a different genre. I mean, heck Rob Zombie, you know, uh, tried to go from the grind house to more, you know, remakes to TV spin-offs and couldn't really do it. Yeah.
00:04:29
Speaker
And so with porkies, what you get is people or kids, teenagers that want to have some fun and they go to local, uh, God, I don't even know what you would call it. Man, it was a bar and just, just so everybody's, everybody knows the movie was like, like we said, uh, made in 1981, but it was the setting was 1954, um, in Florida. So there's a lot of, uh,
00:04:59
Speaker
There's a lot of cultural specifics of that area inside the movie. Oh, I mean, definitely. It is what it is back.
00:05:21
Speaker
And that's the thing, you know back in the day In the 80s and 70s and even in the 90s in some cases they were able to do so much different shit than what they are today And I mean chem cotrell in this movie is pretty much The hottest chick in the world I Mean let's be honest aged she's aged. Well, yes. Yeah, she has um
00:05:50
Speaker
And then another thing is the nickname that they give her character, Lassie. Oh, yes. That was, you know, that scene was, man, that's like, that's one of the, like, there's a few iconic scenes from that movie, no matter how many times you've watched it or how long you've watched it, they just stick out. And that's definitely one. However, the Lassie nickname,
00:06:18
Speaker
I think she screamed more like a banshee during that scene, but I get it. I was about to say. Yes. Yes. But oh my God. And the guy trying to get her to shut up. Ends up shoving a dirty jock strap in her mouth. I'm sitting there watching. I was like, just stick a sock in it. And then he reaches and grabs the dirty jock. And I'm like, oh, shit. Yeah, it's definitely one of those movies where it's just like, what the fuck?
Remaking Porky's Today
00:06:46
Speaker
Like, and that's the thing, those movies were able to do some of that stuff. Where I think today, if you tried to, and you asked me this question about if I think they could make this movie today. I think they could, but honestly, it'd be kind of like what National Lampoon tried to do to be relevant, you know, with like dorm days, all them movies. I think like, okay, I did bring that up. I'll go ahead and, and.
00:07:15
Speaker
elaborate on that when I was watching the movie because remakes are a thing nowadays and so whenever I'm watching an old movie from the 80s or 70s I'm like oh if they were to remake this today what cast would be good so as I'm watching it I'm thinking the broken lizard gang I think if they remade this movie they would give it justice and I think they'd bring the right humor to it of course an updated version or whatnot but
00:07:43
Speaker
But then again, they're kind of old for those parts, considering that it revolves around a high schooler. So if they played like the adult characters and had some younger people in their comedians, it'd probably work out. So as long as they gave their artistic lendings to it, I guess.
00:08:07
Speaker
Well, yeah, and I mean, at the same time, this movie was kind of revolutionary back in 81. I mean, you did have Caddyshack, which kind of... it was hit or miss as a comedy.
00:08:23
Speaker
You know, they had the comedy, then the seriousness, and then, you know, they went outlandish with a gopher that could dance to a song. But with Porky's, I mean, you had, like you said, you had the stereotypes of that era of 1954, in which it was based. You had Alex Karas, who plays Porky's brother, who's a cop. You have Porky, who is the proprietor of a strip club in the Everglades, who's a major pain in the ass.
00:08:51
Speaker
Oh, he's definitely the antagonist for sure. Oh, definitely. I mean, he is such an asshole, but that's the thing. All these characters play a tremendous role within this movie. Like I think movies like this. I'm sorry,
Early Encounters with Adult Comedies
00:09:06
Speaker
go ahead. I didn't step on you. No, no, you're good. I think these coming of age movies is what really nailed home. What people in the 80s probably were feeling.
00:09:21
Speaker
You know, I mean, granted I was born in the nineties. So I can't really say, Oh, Hey, the eighties were a blast, man. So this movie in particular, and I want to harken, but you had brought up saying you were, you were born in the nineties. I was born in the late seventies. So I was 77. So when this movie came out, I was only like four years old. And I remember when I, yeah.
00:09:47
Speaker
Right showing my age actually the first movie I was ever in the theaters for was Star Wars in 77 but I digress I digress anyway, I remember finding this movie in my parents movie collection Probably some 11 12 years old, you know that time period
00:10:08
Speaker
or for us young guys when we're starting to find things out about ourselves, you know, and of course it being a TNA movie. And I'm like, Ooh, what is porkies? Because if you remember the box, I think it had like this hot chick on there. Yeah, you can see Yeah, I got looking through or an eye looking through the people. Yeah, that's what it was. And I'm like, you know, when you're that young, you're thinking, poor, granted, it's not even soft porn. But back then, it was
00:10:38
Speaker
It was almost taboo for somebody of that age to watch. And I remember finding it and waiting for my parents to go out. And as soon as I did, I grabbed that. Yes, it was VHS. I pop it out, pop it into the VCR. And I was amazed. That was probably the first adult comedy movie I had ever watched in my entire life was Porky's. So that set the stage. Yeah, I wish mine would have been Porky's, but mine was actually Animal House.
00:11:08
Speaker
OK. I mean, you being born in the 90s and that being your first raunchy adult comedy. That's impressive. Very impressive.
00:11:16
Speaker
Well, I mean, my parents, it was the TV version of it. So it was like edited and it took out kind of the parts where it'd been like, well, should the kids see this? But I mean, even at bat, it was still like, yeah, it was still, it was still one of those movies that made you think like, wow, you know how porkies was able to get away with some of the stuff they did, how animal house got away with some of the shit they did.
00:11:42
Speaker
But like we said, you know, it is definitely a product of its time, but such a great movie. Well, just I think movies like that paved the way for other movies down the road, just like the opening scene where Peewee's alarm clock's going off. He's got that morning wood going on and his mom barges in and he flips over and well, about breaks it.
00:12:08
Speaker
But it paved the way for movies like, I don't want to say late 90s, early aughts, super bad, American Pie, movies like that. You harken back to movies like Porky's and nowadays you're like, okay, I mean, this raunchy comedies of today is nothing new because it's already been done. It's just a different story.
00:12:31
Speaker
but the element of that raunchiness, that coming of age that you had talked about. A lot of those movies are actually based around high schoolers, et cetera, et cetera. So it's always been a trope to do movies like that. They are typically pretty good because of that raunchiness factor in it. Well, I mean, yeah. And granted, Porky's would have two sequels. And then I think they kind of had like someone did try and soft
00:12:58
Speaker
rebooted but it didn't really work out did not know that I tried I have watched you it's been a long time I don't think I liked it as much as the original I don't I don't actually don't remember anything about it well and that's the thing I I think a lot of what it was back then was that a nonsensical nonsense are you doing kinda weird how weird you know
00:13:25
Speaker
on the YouTube channel recording this and also nonsensical nonsense pops out like God, that's like a fourth wall within a fourth wall break there, folks. But no, um, and that's the thing like Alex Kerris as the sheriff in this movie.
00:13:43
Speaker
And yet you have the bikers, you have the biker kid that's mad at the Jewish guy because he get his ass kicked by the Jewish guy and then, you know, they have to have the slurs in there and it's just like... Yes. Tim's 50s greaser racist redneck father on a 50s Harley, yes. He fed all those asshole tropes for sure. Oh, definitely. And that's the thing that always got me was just like,
00:14:11
Speaker
I always look at movies and there are movies where, you know, the kids of today look back on it differently and go like, you know, maybe they pushed a little too far, but that's not what we saw. I mean, and maybe, maybe they're right. But at the same time to us, it's just a movie.
Hidden Lessons in Raunchy Humor
00:14:32
Speaker
Like, I mean, yeah, at the same time with what he's saying about the Jewish kid isn't a nice thing to say about someone. But at the same time, it's like not like the actor was meaning any of it. No, the actor themselves. I mean, it was written in there. I mean, I looked at it like this. It was it was teaching a moral lesson that, you know,
00:14:59
Speaker
racism and antisemitism is wrong because even like in the locker room scene, when Tim is sitting there going, let's go fly a kite, let's go fly a kite, like, you know, K-I-T-E, somebody had a sound like, dude, you're not even being a smart racist. It's not kite. It's K-I-K-E. And he's just sitting there dumbfounded. It was pretty funny.
00:15:22
Speaker
So I mean that satire element in the movie when it comes to teaching those lessons about racism is bad and being tolerant of other people and stuff. I thought it added a good positive note and element to that movie. It just wasn't all just watchy comedy. There was actually some more lessons there. Other parts of it probably hasn't aged so well compared to now and then, but the overall general idea of
00:15:51
Speaker
know, hey, racism is bad was was always a good element that I always picked up in the movie. So I love when the mean teacher, she's like, I would like to line up these boys. And I can find the perpetrator. I know what they look like. There's a mole on the tally whackers, what they called it the tie. She was
00:16:17
Speaker
Ball Blicker, but they all called her Ball Breaker. Yeah. She was also a cop walker too, but especially when it came to that one coach in Honeywell, Coach Honeywell's name, Kim Cottrell's character. Yes, yes. That is so funny though that that whole scene where Honeywell
00:16:43
Speaker
and the other coach are having sex and the students are losing their mind laughing and one of the older coaches is kind of like what the hell is that oh yeah that one uh the one coach that was trying to pry the other coach into sleeping with her upstairs
00:17:01
Speaker
He lost his shit, like his face turner. I was watching, and every time I watched this movie, and you can also see in the office scene, when you're talking about, you know, let's do a police lineup of all the tally whackers. They're laughing so much. They're so into that role. It's like, I think, you know, I think they're really laughing like that just wasn't them acting like they were really ended up that scene. They were, they were having like really good chemistry with it.
00:17:31
Speaker
Well, the principal is trying to understand why Ball Breaker is wanting to line these men up and look at their units. Because she notices the one that, you know, she was grabbing onto, which the shower scene. Oh my God, I felt so bad for that guy. So the shower scene, the lassie scene, and of course at the end when they tear down Porky's bar,
00:17:58
Speaker
And the egg scene in the beginning, I think, for me, are probably the most four iconic scenes in this whole movie. Oh, definitely. Definitely. Yeah, when they tear down. Well, see, here's the thing. When they get thrown out of porkies, one of their classmates makes attempt each time to go back there and comes back after getting their ass kicked.
00:18:24
Speaker
Yes, Mickey would never learn his lesson the entire time. And Mickey finally comes back near the end of the movie and he has really gotten his ass kicked pretty bad to the point where Cavanaugh, who is like the deputy of the town, comes and says, you know what, we need to take Porky down.
00:18:48
Speaker
So, Cavanaugh, the police of that town was Mickey's brother. I think it was his brother. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think his name was Cavanaugh or maybe that was the biker. Dude, it's been like a long time since I've seen this film, but I can still remember. Essentially, the link, you didn't watch it?
00:19:11
Speaker
dude, like I've been busy with everything else going on right now. Like you're good. If you do use that link, because it was the only place I can find it where it was just for everybody out there knows it was on OMG flicks with it with an ex dot org. And if you watch any movie from that website, have your ad blocker up every time I paused it, played
00:19:35
Speaker
anything just like go 10 seconds back so I can just pop up, pop up, pop up, pop up. I'm like, I bet Steven's having a headache with this too. But you saved yourself the headache. Yeah, if I'm if I'm gonna watch that, like it was on Amazon Prime a while back. And I was just like, Oh, I should watch this movie. And I didn't for some, I had it saved to the watch list. And then all of a sudden, my wife's like, well, let's watch a different movie. And it's like, okay,
00:20:03
Speaker
Then we watched a different raunchy comedy and yeah, I used to own a copy of it. I had it on DVD. But I don't I don't think I have a DVD player anymore. And we do say this, the movie that we got a porkies, they should have just made it the unrated version.
00:20:24
Speaker
I swear to God, if they have an unrated version of Porky's somewhere, I feel like there wouldn't be much new footage that we hadn't already seen. No. I don't think they really did movies like that back then. I think what we saw is what came off the cutting room floor. I don't think they... Yeah. Yeah, there was like director's cuts or unrated versions or anything, but you never know. Maybe one day, they'll find some old locked up eight millimeter reels like, oh, let's recut this.
00:20:53
Speaker
Yeah, might be good. I mean, and that's the scary thing. Like if you could have imagined the bloopers for that movie. The blooper reel for that movie, I bet it would be amazing. It would be just gold. It would be gold. Well, exactly. And.
00:21:15
Speaker
You know, when we did, when me and blazing, we're talking about what we wanted to do for this show, you know, even just talking about porkies probably isn't enough because a lot of those movies in the eighties, it seemed like they tried to top themselves in the comedy realm. I mean, yeah, you had the John Hughes comedies, but those ones were dealing more with teen issues and, you know, Oh, I don't know. I think this one dealt with, with, with Peewee's teen issues.
00:21:45
Speaker
trying to lose his virginity the entire time of the movie. I laugh when he's like the condoms too big and the big guys just like will wrap it or just tie a knot in it.
Comedic Elements and Iconic Scenes
00:21:57
Speaker
Yeah, like that's going to work. I like when Wendy gave him that huge freaking condom and then
00:22:06
Speaker
Uh, God, I think it, I forgot what, what, what, what, uh, character was, but he takes it and he blows it up. He's going around, like pumping other female students and then he turns around and there's old fucking ball breaker. And then the air comes rushing out of it and it's, and you can, it sounds like it was a balloon squeaking, losing air. I'm like, condoms losing air. Don't even sound like that. Speaking of sound effects.
00:22:33
Speaker
When Porky's bar was being torn down, I swear to God, it sounded like somebody's right off camera with a huge sheet of metal just banging on it. Yeah. And I mean, when they tore that down at the end, like it is funny as hell because it's just like, okay, guys, you're high school students and you're making this look like it's a paramilitary operation.
00:22:59
Speaker
They did. Absolutely. It was like Navy SEAL team six going in to take down porkies. Yep.
00:23:06
Speaker
our mission is no longer take down Osama bin Laden is take down porkies well and that's the thing like the ending is just like okay guys you're high school students you should not be knowing how to do all this shit yeah like yeah i mean sawing through the boards and all that okay i can understand that that's easy but like i mean they they had
00:23:29
Speaker
in like just five minutes of planning this out it was like well Jesus what you call the 81st Airborne to help you out too? Yes dude I every single car in there of course this movie was set in the 50s every single car in there looked like it was brand new off the freaking showroom floor
00:23:52
Speaker
And it was funny, because you have all these affluent white kids from the coastline going to the Everglades to Redneck Freakin' Central, walking up in a strip bar, being like, we want to pay for some pussy. I mean, yeah. Way, way out of their element.
00:24:15
Speaker
Yeah, that was the thing. It was just like, okay, you're going to the Everglades to a strip club. But yet, like you said, you, they probably lived on the coast and there's no strip club near you guys. Like, I mean, come on, you it's, it's Florida. Let's be honest. And it's just like, really? There's no strip clubs in the whole state of Florida. Oh, but no, we gotta go to Everglades just to find the lonely strip club.
00:24:41
Speaker
I don't know. I don't know my stripper club culture down in Florida in the 50s. I honestly didn't think strip clubs were a thing in the 50s, but I didn't know a lot of things were around in the 50s, like that big giant size gag condom. I didn't know gag gifts were like a thing like that. I was shocked when I saw that. I was like, I forgot about that part. I'm like, where did this huge condom come from in the 50s? I didn't, but hey.
00:25:09
Speaker
I the one thing that surprised me is they didn't get Chevy Chase or Bill Murray to be in this movie. So, yes, well, it wasn't it wasn't a big production. Well, no, or for actors of that caliber at that point in movie making, I don't think it was pretty much the probably unknowns. I mean, I would be shocked if Kim Cottrell had done
00:25:38
Speaker
Anything to that point maybe soap operas because those were big and I mean kind of still are and And maybe that's how she got her start who knows but I think this movie Catapulted for what she would later do in the 90s with sex in the city But yeah, I mean this this movie did
00:26:04
Speaker
pretty much put a lot of those actors on the map. And sadly, we've lost quite a few of them. And to be honest, I think this movie is a testament to 80s raunchy comedy. I really do. Because, yeah, it did have two sequels after this. And like I said, kind of like a soft core reboot.
00:26:32
Speaker
but I mean, it's just this movie alone. If you've never seen any of the other ones, you're really not missing much because they didn't understand what they had with Porky's. And I think Porky's 2 kind of tried to jump the shark in an absolute different direction. Like I said earlier, I don't ever remember watching Porky's 2. I know I did. Like anybody out there has never seen the Porky's franchise. Literally, if you just watched the first one,
00:27:03
Speaker
It's all you need to enjoy it. The first one stands alone by itself. New sequels were actually ever needed, I think. Well, and that's the thing. It always did bother me when you have these great movies. And then all of a sudden, it's like, well, we had one good shot. Let's try and see what else we can do with it. And like you said, Perky's didn't need any sequels.
00:27:29
Speaker
But the same could be said with one thing that did shock me and does to this day is they didn't try and make it into a TV series. Because they did that with Animal House. Did they really? I did not know that. Yeah, they did. They.
00:27:47
Speaker
They did it with Animal House. And then, of course, when we got the later National Lampoon's like dorm days and all that, it was pretty much an attempt to try and go back to what had worked, because by that point, National Lampoon in the late 2000s was on its deathbed. And I mean, the magazine had pretty much stopped circulating and it was just hanging on by a thread with these movies that they made.
00:28:17
Speaker
and none of the movies that they tried to replicate what had worked in the 80s didn't really work in the 2000s or in the 90s as well because you I think some of them did I think like I said super bad and I think American Pie worked although after yeah but after they came out with sequel after sequel after sequel after sequel it just that's what really just killed the franchise
00:28:43
Speaker
Well, definitely. And for all those that are joining us, we're not just talking, we are talking about porkies, but in the general area of it, I think we're also talking about comedy and how far it's come today. I mean, and that's the thing, you know? Go ahead, go ahead.
00:29:05
Speaker
But I mean even with how comedy was Like with the Mel Brooks era of the late 70s to 80s to now. I mean blazing saddles If we really want to go down that rabbit hole that movie could not be made today. I Disagree, but that's it. That's a debate for another day. I
00:29:32
Speaker
And I mean, with animal house, could they get away with, you know, some of that today, maybe, but I think it would have to be like a finer line than what, because you got to realize the sensors and all that, I'm sure they had their finger ready to hit that button and say, Nope, this movie will not be made.
00:29:56
Speaker
I think in a lot of ways, movies have become less censored. In some aspects, they're definitely more restrained. But I also think that sometimes when certain elements of a certain particular art forms are restrained, it has those artists, depending on their art,
00:30:18
Speaker
to come up with different creative ways. So I think it's like a double-edged sword. Yes, it's bad in some ways, but yes, it can be good as well. Well, and that's the thing. Comedy has to evolve. What would work back, and like we said, in the 80s, it probably still worked in the 90s, but then you got to keep evolving with the times.
00:30:47
Speaker
And and that's why I say. And like we we touched on the question you had asked earlier about could porkies be made today? Yeah, but I think there'd be so many different. Like in your face messages where back then it was kind of like. There was the messages there was the political undertones, but I don't think it would be as bad as today.
00:31:15
Speaker
because a lot of the comedy movies have to have that well back then it was okay to say this but now you know it's kind of like we can't touch on it i don't know so there was a scene in porkies it was the prank phone call p we played on windy
00:31:31
Speaker
But he called the Deadbeat Diner, which I think calling a diner a deadbeat, I think it's just an awesome name. But anyway, what he calls in, it's that old phone prank. And I totally forgot this is the movie that coined it, the Michael Hunt freaking prank phone call. You called like, hey, I'm looking at my, he was like, he calls like, hey, a friend of mine was supposed to show up there. I'm calling to see if he's there.
00:32:02
Speaker
And when he's like, well, what's his name? He goes, Michael Hunt. He goes, you just call him Mike Hunt. And she's over the loudspeaker. I had totally forgot. I didn't forget about that prank phone call or that joke. I mean, it's been around for decades. I just forgot where it came from. This is the movie it came from.
00:32:21
Speaker
So I had even forgot about that scene. I should have watched that link you sent me, but but I said I watch it. I got a whole bunch of notes over here with different about different scenes. Like, I mean, the shower scene like we kind of glossed over that scene in particular. Like.
00:32:42
Speaker
They're watching the lady shower and Pee Wee gets blocked by a student and he's like, move your ass. So then all breaker comes in and she sees one of them with his unit. Tallywacker. Tallywacker.
00:32:59
Speaker
Tell wagging in the fucking little peephole. So what does she do? She like zeros in on it and just friggin greeks on it while his friends are laughing at him. Not trying to. I think it was funny, like she's got this grip on it. She puts her foot up on the wall. She's really just like he's like she's trying to like pull his entire body or not just rip it off it.
00:33:26
Speaker
pull him entirely through that little itty bitty hole. It's hilarious. She really wanted to bust that guy. And yeah, when she's telling the principal how she wants to find the perpetrator, I mean that principal alone has got to be like, oh my god, how did I ever hire this lady? Lawsuits would happen.
00:33:51
Speaker
And he's like, so let me get this straight. You want us to line these boys up and you can tell us what they look like from their telewax. And the two people in the back are just dying laughing. Like, I wonder if I could find that on TikTok.
00:34:12
Speaker
on that one coach was like, well, we can go a step farther and call the police station and getting sketch writers down here. We can put up one of we can put wanted posters up like, have you seen this prick? Yeah, it's it is what it is back in that day. But see, that's the thing is that so much. Oh, God, I found it.
00:34:40
Speaker
All right. I will share the screen for this one because this is oh, my God. Good. It's a good scene to share. And this is one of those scenes where I think the actors like were really into the whole entire part. Like it was just it was it was less of them acting and then just getting into it. But I think this is the only way to find that boy. Now, that penis had a mole on it. I'd recognize that penis anywhere.
00:35:11
Speaker
In spite of the juvenile smokers of some, this is a serious matter. That seducer and a spoiler must be stopped. He's extremely dangerous. And, Mr. Carter, I'm certain that everyone in this room knows who that is. He's a contemptible little pervert. Who's a battle-breaker? Well...
00:35:37
Speaker
But I've got him now and I'm not going to let him slip through my fingers. But it did slip through her fingers.
00:36:11
Speaker
Well, what are you going to do about it? Five young boys in the nude, please line up so that you can identify Miss Tallywacker. Please, please, can we call it a Tallywacker? Penis is so personal. Penis is so personal.
00:36:46
Speaker
We have got to do it as distasteful as it is.
00:37:02
Speaker
I'm telling you, I had a mole. And that mole is the key to it. Mr. Albrecht, do you realize the dignity of your request? Now, I would be very happy to apprehend the young man, myself. But can you imagine what the Board of Education would say? If you were granted a line-up in order to examine their private pa-pa-pa...
00:37:33
Speaker
They're private parts for an incriminating moment. Mr. Carter. Mr. Carter. I think I have a way out of this. Call the police and we haven't sent over one of their sketch artists.
00:37:59
Speaker
and this ball breaker can give a description we can put out wanted posters all over us you can just tell the principals trying to not lose it you brought up looper wheels earlier this up at this scene they had many takes
00:38:30
Speaker
Oh, I'm sure. I love that. We'll put on the wanted poster armed and dangerous.
00:39:00
Speaker
Oh my God, yeah, like and that's the thing. Like they're talking about the port of education getting involved. Even back then I am sure that would have been a publicity nightmare for that school. Not only did she want to end, she later says, well, in order for discretion we could put hoods on them.
00:39:19
Speaker
And it's just like, oh my God, like this teacher, honestly, you're you're you're watching that scene and going like, how in the hell would that one that teacher get away with, even though the students in the shower scene were in the wrong, they were in the women's privacy. But I mean, she literally grabs the guy's tally wacker with like such a grip on there. And the other kids are laughing because they're like, oh, she's got something.
00:39:50
Speaker
And the poor kid is just trying to get out of there and it's just like, oh my god. But that's the way this movie was. I think today's episode is brought to you by the letter T for Tallywacker. Sorry, I just find that word Tallywacker so fucking hilarious.
00:40:10
Speaker
I know. All I could think of is the count from fucking Sesame Street going like, the word of today is Tallywacka. Yes. So movies this old, they didn't have a whole lot of brand placement or product placements. So you don't see like Coca-Cola and Pepsi and all that shit splattered over in the fucking scene.
00:40:34
Speaker
But there was one thing that stood out. I watch old movies like this. Those little details within props and stuff like, oh, that prop shouldn't be there. It's out of time for that period. I don't know what it is. I got OCD for that shit. But there was a beer that meat. By the way, anybody with a nickname, Meat, that has the potential for a scholarship to go to Princeton,
00:41:03
Speaker
No, I mean he didn't get it, but I'm just like no, but he was drinking a beer called regal ale So I looked it up. It was brewed in New Orleans and there and it's been discontinued So I was kind of sad about that, but I don't know I just it was just a little little tidbit of factoid nothing nothing important Oh, yeah, I mean definitely back in the day the product placement probably back in the day wasn't as
00:41:34
Speaker
big I mean yeah you would see the old coca-cola little plastic cups and movies back in that time but I mean it's not like they're like oh hey look brand placement you know well that's just a testament to our time or ad ad revenue is like one of the hugest things that well we spend money on well yeah and I mean nowadays most movies if they do have that it's trying to sell the product I mean heck yep
00:42:04
Speaker
Well, that's where some of the movies get their financial backing is for all these companies like, hey, we'll invest in your movie to make if you advertise our brand in your movie. So yeah. Well, yeah. And that's the next major thing about this is that if they would have had some brand placement in this movie, do you think they would have went overboard with it? Or do you think it would have been? I don't think it would.
00:42:36
Speaker
I hate to say that I think product placement takes value away from a movie because it's so all over the place now, but I think in some ways it does.
00:42:51
Speaker
I think it because, because when you're watching a scene in this movie, like I said, had no brand placement. When you're watching this movie and it seems like you're, you're paying attention to the scene. You're not sitting here watching and all of a sudden Coca-Cola, you know, like squirrel, you know, you can actually appreciate the movie for what it is. So, well, definitely. And you know, as we keep talking about some of the key scenes in this movie, this movie is,
00:43:20
Speaker
What it is, it's an 80s masterpiece that, honestly- I thought you were gonna call it an 80s masturbation movie at first. Not gonna touch that subject. But no, I mean, let's be honest, a lot of people probably saw that scene with Kim Cottrell and I mean, you know, hey. And they were probably screaming like a banshee too.
00:43:45
Speaker
I love how he got so involved with trying to find out why he's why she was called lassie while he's while they're having sex it's like dude focus on the task at hand like there's no way this chick in real life would have ever found you of any importance with a few scenes that led up to the buildup of the
00:44:12
Speaker
The laundry room, I guess that's where all the- Yeah, the laundry room. Yeah. The previous coach would just get her up there and he was like, oh, no, no, no. But he was dating her and he was saying, well, she's a virgin, she doesn't screw around and blah, blah, blah. She's pure. Oh, yeah. As soon as he got her up in there, she smelled all the dirty jock straps that got turned on. So, yeah. It's like, yeah, I don't think she's pure anymore, buddy.
00:44:39
Speaker
And I think she ever was No, and and that's the thing like this movie is in no way Gonna be like, oh, you know, hey, we're not gonna shy away from talking about sexuality They don't know the whole movie was based was yeah, I mean that was its main Plot with sexuality. I mean, like I said, it was about pee whee's adventure pee whee's adventure pee whee's quest
00:45:10
Speaker
Pee-wee's quest to learn his virginity I mean the whole movie revolved around sex which isn't which isn't bad. I don't know it can be a plot It was a huge plot I mean because they they first try you know Hiring a stripper at Portuguese. They end up going into the cabin in the woods
00:45:34
Speaker
So the cabin in the woods, I thought, was one of the most hilarious scenes. So I don't know who's ever watching this. If you haven't seen Porky's, what had happened was two of the friends hired this big black dude. And this one stripper lady, I think her name was, oh, I got it down right here. Hold on. Miss Cherry something. Oh, shoot.
00:46:04
Speaker
and the scene anyway anyways so miss cherry forever was her name and so what they did is these these these two friends got a bunch of their other friends in on this this idea of going to this cabin which looked like it a 50s trap house
00:46:26
Speaker
Fucking it was a ran down shack. And the thing was, all the friends were going to line up and take turns getting laid. And they were going to pay for it, of course. So they walk in, and the two friends are like, OK, everybody get naked. And they're like, why? And they're like, well, she's got to check you for VD.
00:46:50
Speaker
And they're like, how does she just look at us and tell that we have VD? Well, she's an expert, apparently, is what he said. So they all wind up.
00:46:59
Speaker
the two friends that are, um, uh, it's orchestrated this prank, go into the room with her and they start pretending like they're having sex, making the noises, bouncing up and down on the bed. And, uh, all of a sudden the black guy is in there too. And he's got this machete with fake blood all over it. She smashes the window and you can hear, hear the dude go, why are you fucking my wife or some bullshit like that? And all the naked guys out all lined up are like, what's going on?
00:47:28
Speaker
And then one of the kids that was, you know, that helped orchestrate this had fake blood on all over him. So he comes bursting out of the freaking door, falling over like he's dying and they all lose their shit. I mean, and they all book out the door when a black guy comes out with the machete, they turn tail.
00:47:48
Speaker
All of them realize it was a joke after a couple of minutes. Except for Pee-wee. Except for Pee-wee. Pee-wee's hauling ass butt naked down the road, and that's when the cops pull up next to pull over. Let me see your license and registration. Yeah, it's a very, very good scene. I just love how they're coming up on Porky Pee-wee running, and they're just like, oh my god.
00:48:17
Speaker
I mean, and, and that's the thing, like back in those days when they made these movies, like people, kids or teenagers today would probably watch this movie and be like, how is, how are they not bringing him to the police station for, you know, um, indecent exposure or whatever Newton public or whatever shit like that. And it's just like, because they probably realized at one point they did the same shit too.
00:48:47
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Well. And in some ways, and when it comes to things like that, it's gotten stricter over time. They take less. Yeah, they're harsher, I agree. Yeah, I mean, just like them, like tearing down the freaking porkies bar and putting people's lives in danger and et cetera, et cetera. But again, it's a movie. It's fantasy. I don't like to judge it too much against reality, but I do see what you're talking about.
00:49:18
Speaker
Well, and that's the thing, you know, with this movie is that even though people would probably nitpick it to death, it is what it is. And that's a movie. And it's a funny movie. Like it's definitely one of those movies of the 80s that was like it was different, but it also didn't play up to. Well, you know, we're kind of like a high school version of Animal House. Let's be Animal House. It's not like that at all. It literally.
00:49:49
Speaker
as i say it was the product of the early 80s and they didn't it was a product over the top it was a product of the early 80s trying to recreate a movie from the or recreate a time saving a time setting of the 50s actually yeah and that's and it's and it's weird because i've noticed this with other movies that are like
00:50:14
Speaker
Made it a certain time, but it's representing the time. The time setting is representative of decades prior. And so they just hit on a lot of those tropes that you hear about in that time. So that's shut up. That's what I got out of it. Glicks over here trying to make fun of me. Because I used literally. I had an option to comments.
00:50:41
Speaker
Yeah, I kind of try and show comments every now and then. Like I said, I actually, I typed out notes and I have my notes up on the side so it's covering all the comments. Well, hey, you know, maybe one day, Blazing becomes the coho, the second chair of the show. I'm looking for one, but I, you know.
00:51:02
Speaker
We're trying this out. We're seeing how it works. You know, who knows? Maybe I have a big, huge round table. I mean, you know, nonsensical nonsense has four people on some of their shows. Saturday nights, though, it's a it's a plethora of pranksters delightfully engaging in shenanigans. I don't know when most people are accusing me of having my wife handcuffed to a radiator that I don't know, but
00:51:32
Speaker
I mean hey, maybe we're all living out a fantasy of we're back in those comedy movies, which I really don't have my wife handcuffed to anything. If anything, I'd be in a cage for that.
00:51:48
Speaker
The creators of Non-Cycle Nonsense definitely get their comedic aspirations from movies like Porky's. It's good. It's a bunch of dick and fart jokes. That's what we are and we don't stray away from it. Man, I don't care how old a person is. If you don't freaking find fart jokes funny when you're 50, you're not going to find them funny when you're 80. You can go funny somewhere else.
00:52:16
Speaker
Well, and that's the thing. You like look back on how some people found a lot of this funny. And literally it's stupid comedy is what made this movie what it was. And some people don't like it. I mean, hell, there's people that don't like what Monty Python did. There's people that don't like what Three Stages did.
00:52:38
Speaker
Well, I think a lot of times in porkies is a good example. People will watch you like, oh, it's just nothing but dirty jokes. And it's really not like you said, like I was saying earlier, you peel back those layers of that onion and you get the satire poking fun at racism and how racism is stupid.
Real-Life Reflections in Raunchy Comedies
00:52:57
Speaker
And, you know, you know, hey, drop all your differences. We come together as friends and yada, yada, yada. I mean, those are real valuable moral lessons that anybody can take away.
00:53:08
Speaker
And of course, it's underneath this raunchy comedy of fart jokes, and tit jokes, and penis jokes, and all that. Because that's real life, too. We have those things, and we joke about it, and we all have these experiences that are awkward at times, and that's what they make fun of. And I think it's good. Within itself, those raunchy jokes also bring the message that we're all human,
00:53:36
Speaker
We have awkward experiences. It's better just to laugh at them. Well, and that's the thing, you know, this movie has so many of the comedy troops that have made comedy even back in the day. It's got the slapstick. It's got the, like you said, the satire, you know, the coming of age, you know, the, the how we were all at one point kind of like, you know, we're, we're becoming, I mean, guys.
00:54:04
Speaker
Let's be honest, when we're seniors, some, some of us were like, Hey, you know, we're seniors and we're listening to some of our friends tell us about, Oh man, I had sex with this girl and that girl. And we're kind of just like, Oh, okay. Cool. Like sweet. You know, and, and that's the thing. This movie pretty much is a calling card to what I'm sure a lot of teenagers felt.
00:54:31
Speaker
You know, it was just like, oh, we're not a lot of teenagers, mostly the deranged ones. You know, let's be honest, because they get away with that movie. Like, like you said, in the flophouse cabin, like.
00:54:45
Speaker
how in your right mind are you going to be like, Oh yeah, this chick that's done this as her calling is going to be able to tell that I have VD just by looking at me. Like unless she's an expert. Yeah. And then of course, you know, you got a kid running down in the dark, stark ass naked and you have the cops kind of going like, um, okay.
00:55:15
Speaker
it's like it honestly was what some of our friends probably did in high school because let's be honest as kids we were kind of dumb yeah there's a i have a story that involves a strip club me peeing in a parking lot and a cop but that's that's for another night oh man i think that's the saturday night
00:55:40
Speaker
But and that's Saturday night thing. And that's the thing. Like, let's be honest, how many of us didn't have friends? I would tell you about, oh, hey, I peed on a cop car or oh, hey, you know, I did this stupid thing the other night and, you know, all that stuff. I mean, I'm surprised that they didn't try and make a porkies movie based off of like kids in a church.
00:56:11
Speaker
Like I think that would have been funny because I like stories from the strip club. I mean, Glick, you know, I can send you that link. You can come in and you know, we can share story times. Well, I've never been to a strip club. Never. I have a couple strip club stories like literally two or three and they all involve me getting kicked out. So.
00:56:38
Speaker
Not gonna say I could see that but Yeah, I'm a smart ass But that's what got me kicked that was me being a smart ass. Okay. He wasn't touching the strippers everyone No, no, no, I wasn't doing anything like that. No, it was just I was being a smart ass to either the bouncer You know what Alyssa facts on facts facts on facts
00:57:04
Speaker
Well, most women live longer because they're not as stupid as we are. And I hate to say it, guys, but a lot of us are idiots. I mean, hey, if you take over the show, it might be better than me hosting. I mean, right now I'm kind of going like looking at dead air, you know, blazing's doing amazing. Like I love what blazing's doing, but that's because I came prepared. I did my homework. Oh, OK, nerd. I am a nerd.
00:57:34
Speaker
God, I wish I had that. So much of a nerd. You know what? Maybe I have that. I made sure I had time to watch this movie. Because one, it's one of my favorites. And two, I wanted it fresh. I wanted it fresh on the brain. I need a Jeff. That's what I need. Just like for that nerd one, he could play it. Damn it. Oh. You'll build those in time. Don't worry. You're good. Oh, here we go.
00:58:21
Speaker
I don't think inflation has really hit strip clubs as much as it has hit everything else because back in the 50s, the tip of stripper was a dollar.
00:58:32
Speaker
Today in 2024, people still tip a dollar. Today, you got to use a credit card for that. True. I didn't know where I was. I'm so sorry, folks. I did not know where I was going with that one, and I. Now you look good. I'm not going to explain the joke, everyone.
00:58:59
Speaker
But no, I definitely do. And I want to say this, if anyone hasn't seen this movie, go check it out. I mean, you can buy the movie. It's worth the buy. You can watch it on, you know, which surprised me. YouTube doesn't have it. I mean, honestly, with YouTube and free movies, I'm very shocked that they don't have that movie.
00:59:25
Speaker
Because I mean, oh man, I would love to watch that on the free version of YouTube. But I've noticed with this show, we kind of either need a Jeff or we need to click someone that knows what they're doing. Reach a private chat real quick. So. Oh, shoot, that was the wrong window. I apologize. So.
00:59:55
Speaker
Do you have any like like what was your favorite part of the movie like out of the entire scene?
Favorite Scenes and Personal Preferences
01:00:04
Speaker
That is such a good question. I think my favorite part of the whole scene is the where the ball breaker wants to line these kids up and pretty much wants to be able to have like a police lineup of kids that are showing her their Tallywacker.
01:00:25
Speaker
Words never never that words never gonna stop being not funny Exactly. Yeah But uh, yeah, I think we're gonna wrap it up What's your favorite part in that whole movie? You know, like I said, I hadn't watched it in a while and I almost forgot about the part it was the part in the flophouse I just it was another part of the movie where I thought that I
01:00:50
Speaker
Like every time they were laughing each other and they seemed like they were actually so into that role, it made it seem like it was like a real event going on. And it's just when they're standing, they're all lined up and they hear all the sounds and they're looking at each other like, oh my God, what's going on? Are we about to die? Blah, blah, blah. I just think that was amazing. Like the pranks that they pull on each other. Amazing. Amazing. From the eggs to that to
01:01:18
Speaker
a lot of the other things. But yes, that scene I think was probably the pinnacle of pranks in that whole entire movie. Well, blazing. Thank you so much for joining. Yeah, I had a blast. I'd love it. You are right. I think if we tried to do another hour of this, it would be more of a struggle fest. But let's be honest, some of the shows here. Sometimes we hit nails on the head. Other times we do struggle sometimes. But hey, that's the podcasting business.
01:01:48
Speaker
But like I said, thank you again so very much. I appreciate you coming on the show. Hey, thanks for inviting me. Like I said, man, I will sit here and dork out on movies anytime. Oh, definitely. And you're always welcome. Cool. Sounds great. Also, don't forget to check out other shows on the Nonsensical Network, like the Jarvis podcast here on every Sunday, almost said Saturday.
01:02:16
Speaker
think that was bad. Before we started, I called this the Deluxe Edition Network.
01:02:21
Speaker
Oof. But also we have, on Mondays we have Men Caring for Men, which is a men's mental health show hosted by Glick. You'll also see me on that one with Connor. Tuesdays we have, or every other Tuesdays it's Dollars and Cents, which is gonna become another new show hosted by Jeff. Wednesdays is Nonsensical Nonsense, which is hosted by Glick.
01:02:47
Speaker
featuring us just being us on a Wednesday. Thursdays, we take the day off for Talking Shit. That's S-H-T-T-T, who is now a new member on the network, hosted by Mark and Brian. Funny, funny guys. They're going to have a collaboration with a show that's on Friday called Glick's House of Music.
01:03:11
Speaker
where they will be talking with Richie Ramone of the Ramones. Saturday we have the open door challenge where we share the link in the chat. People can come on as long as you show your face because honestly, let's be honest, we've been hit with a lot of shit like that. And also you can also go see Helen's mix tape where Helen gives
01:03:38
Speaker
God, how, how am I going to say this? She gives an interviews, a bunch of great topics. So go check them out at the nonsense called nonsense network. I'm Steven Jarvis. That's blazing. And we will see you all next time.