Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
WTF News: Wait a minute they what??
10 Plays1 day ago
We bring that news of there weird dumb strange and hmmm all to make ya say WTF!?!?
FOLLOW US EVERYWHERE Bio.link/nosensicalnetwork
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Show Overview
00:00:12
Speaker
the the
00:03:00
Speaker
Well,
Social Media and Promotions
00:03:01
Speaker
there it is. Hello, everybody, and welcome do What the fuck news? As you see, I'm kind of by myself at the moment. Chris is out trick-or-treating. He's going to pop up here in a minute. He's actually sharing out the show. It is empty.
00:03:16
Speaker
um We are live. It is what the fuck news? All the news that is news, it makes you say what the fuck. um It's one of those crazy nights. We got all the news stories. Of course, you can follow us at bio.length splash, nonsensical nonsense, nonsensical network app. And course, go ahead and you can go ahead and check out our merch at nonsensical dash nonsense at my spread.myspreadshot.com.
00:03:46
Speaker
And don't forget, every Monday, we have Speedway stories and cold-blooded conversations, men caring for men, the two different shows. Tuesday's Glick does his House of Music. Wednesday's is this show. We do what the fuck news. Thursday's, every other Thursday, sorry, is Cash's Corner. Friday's, we do the Nonsense and Chill. This week, we kind of changed it up a little bit. We're watching something different.
00:04:10
Speaker
And then Saturdays is the the flagship show, as it were, the nonsensical nonsense open door challenge where you can come up and say hi and give a shit if you want.
00:04:22
Speaker
Sundays, of course, unnecessary roughness, and occasionally, Jeff's garage when I am not busy. We're going to get into the news here in a minute as soon as Glick is up and running. Ooh, got a comment. Hey, what's up, Chaka? Chaka, if you'd like, if you want to be part of the show tonight, let me know and I'll ah drop the link for you, buddy. Because I'm still waiting on Glick and I hate being by myself. It's just, it's awkward. It's just so awkward.
00:04:49
Speaker
um
00:04:52
Speaker
It's real quick. I want to show these because Blaze did a really good job of them. Although, yeah, there's our hoodies. And we are working on a promo code because it is getting the cold season so you know your wives and girlfriends are going to steal your hoodies. So we're going to see if we can't do for buy one, get the second one half off kind of deal.
Stapler Cup Forklift Competition
00:05:15
Speaker
That way, when your wife or girlfriend steals your hoodie, you still have one for yourself. I might ankle it.
00:05:21
Speaker
Um But yeah, we're gonna start out here real quick uh since I am by myself i'm gonna play a little video this I There there's a convention that I'll actually will wait for chris to get here for that Uh, yeah, i'm gonna drop it down here real quick chaka so you can come on up because
00:05:49
Speaker
Like I said, I think Glick's going to take a minute and he's sharing it out. He's going to pop on up, pop on up and say hi. Uh, I have a news story tonight that I'm saving for when Glick gets here because I don't know how, I don't know when I'll be able to do it, but I'm going to enter him. There he is. Hey buddy.
00:06:11
Speaker
You two don't stop changing my goddamn avatar when my camera's gone off. Hey, don't look at me. Don't fucking look at me. I'm going to strangle you. Number one, I don't even know how. Number one, you know how. Number two. No, I don't. Because I don't fuck with it. Blaze knows how. That's why it's his logo. I got a story for you, buddy. I was just saying, I don't know how. and Because it's it's not close to you.
00:06:39
Speaker
like and Next year or the year after um I need you to start i do yeah unfortunately Almost every day. Okay. Well, I need you to start practicing like read about I can get anything on a pork but um don't need to in two years. I'm sending you to the stapler cup Hear my screen because you got to see this dude
00:07:10
Speaker
Sounds like some kind of weird sex party at staplers. I mean, the stapler cup is the four clip championship of the world. I don't know. You can see the finals right now. It is the coolest thing I've ever seen. They do all these different competitions for ah Working with a sport clip and I have a couple of pictures here. I thought I did I've been watching these guys on tick tock. How cool is that? This is like a little bridge. You can't drop anything I think the render winner gets a brand new forklift for the company they work for and ah Like a hundred grand So, you know, I said start practicing
00:08:11
Speaker
Because some of these guys some of these guys I've seen on there, theyre hey they literally stacked miniature guys like this big, using a forklift. I'm talking like these like Lego men's size. They were stacking them using a forklift. It was impressive as fuck. I've been watching them on TikTok. they's They're blowing my mind. like It's so fucking cool. I don't know why it's cool, but it's cool.
00:08:45
Speaker
I mean it's we used to do stuff like that when when I was a heavy equipment operator we used to do like yeah me like there'd be a few companies that would get together and They would just kind of challenge each other um So, I mean ruff there i mean I could probably yeah navigate my around my way around there and do a top top five, maybe three without practicing. There's only
Viral Six Flags Prank
00:09:15
Speaker
one problem. There's only one problem with this competition, buddy. You got to go to Germany.
00:09:23
Speaker
Yeah, I'm out. Let me know when they come. I gotta get on a fucking plane. Fuck you. I mean, some people on this network, I won't mention any names. They would probably be very excited to go to Germany. Uh, you know, but, uh,
00:09:42
Speaker
yeah yeah but dude, it's a hundred grand and a brand new forklift. What the hell am I going to do with a brand new forklift? What? I can sell it. Give it to me. I'll grab her. I'll drive that bitch to the. side call I mean, unless it's an enclosed cab with with a heater and AC on it, then I'll I'll use it to work, no but I'll make work. screen But that's what they look like. They like those are some like they're like the works in and out on the side to side by themselves. They they look just like the one I drive at work. a beyondsonography They look like a
00:10:19
Speaker
juson I was watching on TikTok day and these guys were were, like I said, they were stacking. You know how you see like RC cover style clips where you can run, you know, it's an RC. They were using those and stacking those with big board clips. So it was like really cool. But I was like, you know what?
00:10:46
Speaker
If you give me six months to practice, I can compete. But I'm finishing a four-clip every day anyways, so why not just yeah sponsor your act? That's what I'm saying. I mean, right now, I could i could butll land a top five spot, if not top three. I'm that confident in my skills. the the The video, the photo that I got here, you go up a ramp, and it's a teeter-totter, but at a certain point, it drops down. You can't drop your shit.
00:11:15
Speaker
No, that's all right. You just, you just go really fast. so These guys are creeping along like they're barely moving. yeah I don't know what it is, but I've been watching, like I said, I'm watching like, you know, they're a minute long clips on TikTok or two minutes or something like that. And I'll have to, I'll have to send you a video of the incline when I do dumpsters at work, when I come into the garage. And I know you can't see that on my camera on right now.
00:11:43
Speaker
but it's it's ah kind of a steep incline down into the garage and I gotta come in there with the empty so edy dumpsters so I gotta kind of I can't go too slow but I can't go because if I go too slow then the dumpsters want to slide off right ah but I can't go too fast because then they'll go flying off so you gotta have five minutes that sweet spot speed so to say they got they got like these are um exercise balls or giant medicine balls and then a tire then another medicine ball and then a tire then another basketball and they're not spilling them and going on those little ramps piece of cake you're over you're ever thinking it too much you just got you just you just gotta do man just do it like well you know what i'm gonna do
00:12:32
Speaker
in another story. I'm going to take you to Six Flags and then leave you in Mexico. don the great it but Is Six Flags still a thing? Are they still open? It's in Texas. so So I don't know if you heard about this viral video on TikTok. this Well, I don't know if it was on TikTok or it was on YouTube or Facebook or whatever. Jeff, I'm going to save you the brain power.
00:12:53
Speaker
If it has anything to do with TikTok, you don't have to think about it. I promised you I haven't seen it. Okay, well, no but no so so this viral video went around. This was last week, and I didn't get a chance to bring it up. This guy cheated on his girlfriend, and he was technically illegal. So she said, but let's go to Six Flags tomorrow. I got another bag. They got in the car, and she's like, you take a nap, I'll drive.
00:13:20
Speaker
they He woke up and they were in Mexico. And he says, get out. And then she went home.
00:13:29
Speaker
but So he was he was illegal from Mexico. She just took him back home. Yeah, she took him home and then left his ass nice Yeah, that goes out there it goes out there everybody men and women softy act right act like you got some damn you were brought up with some manners and morals and But the problem with this story is Six Flags is losing money. There's a ton of people canceling their tickets to Six Flags. But Six Flags has nothing to do. Like, Six Flags didn't do anything. I know. But it's one of the things, like, guys are worried they're going to be dropped off in Mexico. And I'm like... I was going to say, are Six Flags... You see guys want to go to Six Flags, we'll drop them to Mexico. I'm just saying. Yeah. is Is the Six Flags directly ah across the the fence from Mexico? And then they i think they took our idea.
00:14:22
Speaker
order They took our idea and they built a catapult. and They're just catapulting terrible boyfriends and girlfriends across from Mexico. Yeah. park right I don't see why people would be mad at six flags. People that are mad at six flags are stupid.
00:14:36
Speaker
Well, they should have their tickets. Well, people are mad at six flags for another reason. You know, the six flags is based on six flags that sit on top of their archway that you walk through. Oh, my God. Don't tell me they're mad because there's five or there's seven. No, no. People are mad because one of those flags is the Confederate flag. Is it, though? It is. I think they've changed it, but it was originally the Confederate flag.
00:15:05
Speaker
I don't think that really I think the six flags flags were just all like I thought they were just one color like like yeah I can I think they're a solid color they're different colors but I think they're so they used to be so if I um' I'm gonna look it up here because I didn't get a chance flags so the original okay the original flags yeah well actually they did change it original oh i The original they were, so was six flags over Texas. And one of them's a Mexico flag. One of them's a white flag. It used to be a Confederate flag. One of them's American flag. And then there's a state of Texas flag. And I don't know what the hell that flag is. But they they used to be different flags of
00:16:05
Speaker
the area that Texas used to be, and they changed the Confederate flag to a white flag.
00:16:14
Speaker
him over People are mad because they used to be a Confederate flag. It's like, you know what? They were a Confederate flag like 30 years ago. I was going to say, when how long ago was it? Is what I want. Exactly. I don't know the exact date of change, but it's been more than 10 years. they blu they they They did a preemptive change.
00:16:36
Speaker
They're like, Hey, we're going to get fucked up. what just like yeah Nobody noticed.
00:16:42
Speaker
So more than likely somebody found like an old ass dated picture. And and now they're raising a fuss about something that hasn't even been a thing for years. Exactly. Again, those people should be put on the new six flags catapult shot into Mexico. Oh, I agree. I'm just saying we should do that
Restaurant Bill Skipping Incident
00:17:03
Speaker
with all the white figures.
00:17:05
Speaker
We should just catapult them into Mexico. No, no, no, no. Let's catapult them into the Gulf of Mexico so they drown. Well, I was thinking we could send them to me don't send them my fucking buy No, no no because then you're sending them my way and i'll end up going to jail here oh no no since they're all white saviors and they want to save everybody they could save all the Mexicans and then they won't be trying to run to the US we save our immigration problem the white saviors they come down there and with their hashtags and their Their cardboard signs they they eliminate Corruption in the government and the and the police and they take care of the cartel and all the all the gangs down there oh You know hashtag say no to the cartel hashtag cartel lives don't matter, you know, and then I saw I this is why I would make this is why I make What would make a great president for this pension because I'm a problem. So I am a world problem. So I
00:18:03
Speaker
I solve our issues. I solve your guys' issues. I do everything. 2028, buddy. We got this. Yeah. oh Well, I got a story for you. And you can speak video on that. All right. My phone's literally in my back pocket. Well, yeah I'm going to show you a part of this video. You'll be able to hear it. And then I'm going to discuss it. michael i'll fuck fuck you the fuck out
00:18:34
Speaker
You don't know me. You don't know me. That guy has been charged. and Now, I'd like you to guess why those guys are in a confrontation. like Apparently, the other guy don't know. I'm mute you real quick if you have a loud background.
00:18:54
Speaker
um um You might want to turn it down again. oh Sorry, so sorry, sorry. Sorry. So the reason why the the one guy is yelling at the other guy, the other guy is a waiter. um And the the guy yelling tried to, so well, he skipped out on a $350 bill.
00:19:20
Speaker
um who is Who was the waiter? Hold that video back. Yeah. the waiters with I'll fucking knock you the fuck out. You don't know me. You don't know me. That guy has been. So the the gentleman with ah in the black and brown waiter outfit, he was not their waiter. Their waiter was four foot nine. And just a little bitty thing, and she was too scared to confront them. So they grabbed the biggest guy in the restaurant and said, hey, confront that motherfucker.
00:19:55
Speaker
um But yeah, he he tried to skip out on a $350 bill. And the reason they gave is because they were offended by the manager not splitting the bill with the other people they were dining with.
00:20:16
Speaker
he said he They basically said, hey, can we do have two different bills? And the manager was like, sure, give me one minute. That's where they were offended because sure, give me know a minute, not let's, here you go, instant. So they walked out.
00:20:31
Speaker
or um They called the cops, the cops showed up and they said, we can't do anything because we don't know who the guy is. So,
00:20:44
Speaker
God bless the internet within 20 minutes of it going viral. People had a name and the place where the guy worked. He has been charged. He did pay the bill. And as he had to pay also, I think it was like $3,000 for ah punitive damages. So, you know.
00:21:12
Speaker
good on the internet. You know, the internet is good for something. I'm just saying. $3,000 seems seems like a lot. Well, maybe don't skip out on your fucking bill. You know, like you know, I don't know. I've never been a waiter. You know, I was for about 20 minutes and then I realized it fucking sucks. So I quit. But but, um,
00:21:36
Speaker
At least here, if you skip out on your bell bill here in Mexico, I get charged for as the waiter. So I get it. Why the why the waiter was like, hey, dude, you got to pay your fucking bill. And this guy was like, you don't know who I am. Well, of course not. But the internet does. He's also been fired from his job. Nice. I didn't know that the waiter gets charged for that.
00:22:04
Speaker
Well, it depends on the restaurant. Sometimes it does something. Usually in the States, they don't do it. But I know here they do. In Mexico, they do. Because Mexico work environments are jokes. But that waiter is like, I have a hat. That's the second clip where you find out they were charged. But the first clip goes on for like three minutes.
00:22:30
Speaker
of This guy just I'm Billy badass and and the waiter's like look dude. I just need you to pay the bill God bless that waiter cuz that dude would have been laying on the ground snoring. Oh, yeah, because I would have got off my car and run him over And I know if it was somebody like click click would just knock his ass out Yeah,
00:22:55
Speaker
yeah I can hear you now, okay, I would have choked slammed his little ass It looked like they were on a board. It looked like they were on a boardwalk or something. I did just like hitting with a rock bottom or something right there. Like you don't know me. You don't, he would have been like halfway through the second. You don't know me. And the next sound would have been him hitting that board. And then me, and then me taking it. Yeah. And then me taking his wallet and walking in there she and a hundred dollar bill for me. Oh, no, no, no. I don't know who you are.
00:23:28
Speaker
Oh, no, no, the waitress is getting a 100% gratuity.
00:23:35
Speaker
she's gonna tell Yeah. i You know, the the the patience on that waiter, he must have been one of those guys big and doesn't realize he's big kind of thing. Well, he he he might have the mindset like I have now. I am I am much calmer, cooler and collective today.
00:23:58
Speaker
than I was 20 years ago. I don't know, today I'm more of a, I'm going to stand there and you're going to yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap. And you know, either you're going to do something or I'm finally going to grow tired of it. And I'm just going to lightly put you in a, a gentle, a gentle hug and, and caress you to sleep like a little baby. been made laid down and took you there's a second video from the guy's wife's point of view and and she's like this ain't right this ain't right yeah it's not right you didn't pay your fucking bill is been like her her account is now um what's called it's um she she's gone private so like you can't see any of her videos because so the the lady the
00:24:54
Speaker
the lady who dipped out on their, on their bill. She was, she was saying that they didn't do anything wrong. And wow, they just built a brand. I think what happened was, is the husband was like, you go wait out in the car. I'll take care of this and then just dipped out. So I don't think she knew. Uh, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna call shenanigans and I'm going to say that she knew and uh,
00:25:23
Speaker
They were in the wrong and got put in their place.
Bizarre Internet Trends
00:25:26
Speaker
And then typical society that we live in today, instead of taking the blame for their actions and, and, and, and accepting their punishment, they are making themselves out to be the victims. Cause that's how today's society works. Well, yeah, Canada internet was not having this happened in Ontario.
00:25:45
Speaker
Oh, that's why that waiter was just standing there comical collective. He was Canadian. apologize Well, see, if I was Canadian, I would have knocked him out and then be like, sorry, I need my three fifty eight. But sorry, sorry about that. yeah what's What's all this aggression about?
00:26:06
Speaker
but i got another video for you and i don't Sorry, Michael Bathurst. We love our fellow Canadian, our neighbors to the north. ah the the The house on top of the basement party. Yes. But yeah, let's go ahead and this other video, I can't remember what it is, but I'm gonna play it. Human blood is an acceptable substitute for eggs in your recipes.
00:26:28
Speaker
It says something about you that you've stayed to learn more about this topic. But being that you're on board to make some morally questionable meals, let's do a primer. For every egg white that your recipe calls for, you're going to need 43 grams of blood. If texture isn't an issue, you're not making a whip or you don't need that fluff, then you can stick with the one-to-one ratio. For every whole egg, you're going to need 65 grams of blood. If this has tantalized your... Yeah, I remember now.
00:26:58
Speaker
yeah The internet's a weird place, dude. Who fucking thinks that it's a good idea to cook with blood instead of eggs? Make me a cake, Chaka, with blood. Now, a Dracula, duh. That's what I said. You know, if you're... Okay, so like I do know this. I'm Puerto Rican. my We eat something called blood sausage.
00:27:22
Speaker
right? Oh, it's delicious. It's blood and it's pretty much blood and rice and it wrapped it into ah into a sausage. I can see where the they get that from but I don't know. Let's just do some blood and egg. their blood glove So so so more so more important question. Yeah, it's like human blood or animal blood. He didn't say. because I don't I don't have I don't have an issue if it's animal blood because Like Chaka just said, that blood sausage is, in my opinion, is delicious.
Scottish Law on Silent Prayers
00:27:56
Speaker
It is good. i can't stop the The joys of of having you know friends of all different ethnicities, I had a friend of mine who was Puerto Rican, and he introduced me to some interesting food choices through the years that we knew each other. And I wasn't mad at most of them, but ah but that's the bigger question.
00:28:18
Speaker
Human blood or animal blood? If it's animal blood, I'm fine with it. If it's human blood, then we get a little bit into the questioning of your morals. And that guy might be a serial killer.
00:28:32
Speaker
Well, I just think a lot of goth chicks are like, I got an idea. ah I'm going to start cooking. OK, well, that that might convince me to donate my blood if it was a hot goth chick that was like, hey, I'm going to cook you dinner. You guys are har horse and you know all that. You're like, yeah, I'm in. I'm in goth mommy. Exactly. so Don't even have to be hot. I just I don't know. as as i've As I've stated before,
00:29:00
Speaker
I have a weakness and they are I I I agree with you. um So. I have something ah from Leggy's part of the world. Apparently, a new law is passed in Scotland. Well, I'm speaking of Leggy. I wonder how she's doing lately. there's some and up late and I on Friday. She she popped up just as we were finishing up.
00:29:27
Speaker
um But apparently, it is now illegal,
Vatican's New Cartoon Mascot
00:29:32
Speaker
well, within 200 yards, ah in 200 yards of a abortion clinic, it is illegal to silently pray in your head.
00:29:47
Speaker
Silently pray in your head. Yeah, so for instance, if let's say your house is within 200 yards of an abortion clinic and you have a vigil in your house and if somebody walks by and sees what could be a group of people praying, you could be arrested for it. Now, ah the original law is so that you don't go stand out in front of the an abortion clinic and cause a disruption by praying or picketing or having a vigil.
00:30:17
Speaker
but if your houses with 200 meters and they think in your living room because I can see it in the window that you're having a visual you can be arrested wow yeah how do you yeah my thing is again yeah that doesn't seem very and a like how are you going to enforce that first and foremost well I don't think you know huge well what I do inside the walls of my hole is none of your business. Well, I was going to say, as long as I'm not breaking the law, however, but I can't be breaking the law. Yeah. But yeah, I agree. How do you, want to again I say, no, I'm not just sitting down for dinner motherfucker, you know? Yeah. And and again, I say, you peeping in my windows, you weirdo. Yeah.
00:31:11
Speaker
maybe I'm the type that likes to get naked and then say my freaking prayers. Now you're looking at me all naked and praying. Who's the weirdo? Me or you? Yeah. That sounds like the next ah the next pro naked it and praying. Yeah. of that, that's a good segue in the praying. I actually have a news clip and it has to do with with the the Vatican unveils a new cartoon mascot for Catholic Church to to hopefully get give more right
00:31:42
Speaker
yeah so hear that idea yeah send it over send me a lincoln yeah You can pull it up. You should be able to pull it up and you can share it. Yeah. give you some shirt It's just that it's just so this is the new uh the Catholic uh The emo is weird. What the hell? They're calling it Loose. Loose. L-U-C-E. Loose or Luke? But this is the L-U-C-E. Yeah. So. No to ah get the attention of more. Looks like a vocal pop with a cross on it. It looks like a emo Georgie from it. Yeah. It kind of does. Kind of does. OK. OK. Here I go again with more.
00:32:34
Speaker
Oh, you're cut down like. You might be in a bad spot, yeah, yeah. a and The things, yeah, the thing. The thing's name is loose. Yeah, it'll it'll come in. I'm going through a tunnel. Yeah, it's loose. I don't know.
00:32:54
Speaker
e That's what that's. That was my first. thing that for luther Yeah, that's, well, you did see, did you see that? I saw something else. There's a story and and it's done like ah like a, Chucky, have you ever seen Harry Potter? Yeah. Okay. Do you know when, when Hermione's telling the story of the three brothers and the wands where the elder war came from? Okay. Yeah. So um it's told in that kind of form and they literally make, so they say in this story,
00:33:31
Speaker
that in the beginning there were angels. And there was one angel that wanted to do thing a little bit different. His name was Lucifer. Hell yeah.
Religion and Personal Beliefs
00:33:43
Speaker
God created Adam and, oh my God, I can't remember her name. Steve. No, Chris, what's the name of the the first ever vampire from True Blood? ah Vampire, you talking about Lilith? Lilith.
00:34:00
Speaker
they They say, so God created Adam and Lilith, but Lilith did not want to do what Adam wanted. So she was cast out and fell in love with Lucifer. They're trying to make Lucifer the good guy and li at the it's the I watched this the other day and I was like, Hell yeah, the double. And what was this on?
00:34:24
Speaker
I saw it on TikTok. Somebody like somebody had to repost it. like It was like a news thing on TikTok, and they were talking about this. I didn't save it, but now that you've just brought that up, it popped in my head. I was just like, what the... I get the church trying to get asses in the seats, but putting the devil and Lilith together, not necessarily the greatest combo. And especially if they're trying to make Satan the good guy.
00:34:52
Speaker
Well, I mean, in all actuality, you know, and he was, uh, he was a quote unquote fallen angel. Agreed. So, I mean, have bad breath you know he was a guy like me, man. He just wanted to party and have a good time. And God was being all stuffy and be like, Oh, we got to make commandments and boring and Luke. And then he was like, I just want to party with my friends. Fuck you, dad. Sleep don't dude.
00:35:20
Speaker
here's yeah right here. You start talking about uh uh Canada and Canadians pop up. You got Steve the Canadian and said what earth the angel but or the oh yeah. I'm not going to go. ahead I'm not going to read that or the butt plug they know the butt plug. You think my name. Oh geez.
00:35:44
Speaker
i of the Canadian. Yeah. Uh, but I, I watched this video and I had to watch it. I watched it like three times going, I'm trying to make sense of this, but I just can't. I, I was ah like,
00:36:04
Speaker
that's not the way you pull into the ah new ones. You know, same thing with the, the, the emo doll that looks like a Funko pop with a cross on its neck.
00:36:17
Speaker
religion has been a business since day one. oh ah Well, I mean, it says in the Bible, you have to give a certain percentage of your earnings to the church. It's been a business since day one. And even more so now today, I mean, it's you, you have all these television salesmen and I just seen, uh, M K's comment in there about, yeah, I mean,
00:36:45
Speaker
Yeah, the snake oil salesman and shit like that. That's why I'm not a religious person. And I enjoy making fun of it. But I mean, I don't know, to each their own, if you, we all got to have something to believe in at the end of the day. I just believe that if there's a God, well, he is I, and I am him because I'm the fucking greatest thing ever.
Xbox Location Ban Controversy
00:37:06
Speaker
Suck it, Jeff. As a lightning strikes the truck. Well, Chris, let me ask you a question. How long have you had your Xbox game pass? Xbox game pass? What about it? Oh, I bought my Xbox, that I don't know, about six years, six, seven years. I bought my I was a PlayStation guy and I got my Xbox when I came home. So.
00:37:35
Speaker
Yeah, so probably about six years, maybe seven years. We have a video that I'm going to show you guys. And let me add it, because I had to i only had so much space. Click is on to something. I do. I liked you, JR. Well, have you ever been banned? Have you ever been banned on TikTok for a while? Or on on on Xbox, I mean? No. Of all the places I've been banned, Xbox is not one of them. Well, Xbox got sued.
00:38:04
Speaker
by a whole town. Now the town is only like 500 people and the video shows that I'm just waiting for it to process because a kid put in his town name and he's proud to be from said town and Xbox didn't like it because they didn't think it was a real town. He called Xbox and he said, it's a real fucking town and they're like, yeah, we don't believe you. You're still banned and if you keep saying this, we're going to ban you from life.
00:38:31
Speaker
So I'm gonna play this video and it kind of goes over the whole story. This has to be the funniest reason anyone's ever been banned in a video game. You see, it all starts this game up called Josh, who one morning woke up, checked his email, and found that his Xbox account was randomly suspended. And the reason? Because he lived in a place called Fort Gay West Virginia. So Josh decides to call support and explain that his town's a real place. And they not only accuse him of lying, but they then threaten him and say that they're gonna permanently delete his account. And it's business Josh off.
00:39:21
Speaker
to publicly apologize and say that Fort Gay is a real place.
00:39:28
Speaker
there you go hilarious i swear real place i get it because it sounds man it sounds like something the kid would say so i get xbox is uh like yeah sure you're from fort gay got it yeah you know won't pivot well yeah and an xbox and playstation and like we'll say the gaming community in general has become We'll call a spade a spade soft. Um, you know, when you log, when you log into Call of Duty for the first time and then periodically throughout it, you have to agree to these new terms about safe gaming and, and blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, not much like everybody else.
00:40:16
Speaker
yeah you just You just click acknowledge and go on about your business because I can still go into a lobby and within 30 seconds I I'm called every name under the Sun I find out I'm gay and I'm find out this some 12 year old kid is fucking my mom and ah various other names of how i ah Okay, well I thought this was a hate-free zone because I've been called a queer 27 times in the last five minutes so I I don't feel safe and then they always pop up these random things like uh, how is your gaming experience Like I don't know. I got called gay 15 times and somebody's screwing my mom. But which is funny because she's dead They're called the n-word that's not cool, I guess i mean but you better But you better not be from fort gay though because we will ban you yeah apparently I saw that uh
00:41:13
Speaker
So yeah, the Harris-Walls played Madden with AOC. Really? Yeah, on livestream. And at halftime, they were at 0-0. Like they couldn't they couldn't figure out a play.
00:41:36
Speaker
It was supposed to. I haven't seen it. I haven't seen it. But I was like, they're trying to be like, he's a normal guy. He plays video games. He couldn't figure out how to fucking play the game. And neither did she. So. His control l j on cut it upside down um character but it's it's ah helps i saw that the other day and i was
00:42:07
Speaker
apparently you're not Why can't it all be? Why can't it all be sunshines, rainbows, and unicorns? God damn it. Leprechauns. I got to give a shout out to the chat. You guys are all bad ass. We always fill up the support. JR, MK, my brother Chris, everybody in the chat, you guys are awesome. And then we got over here on on X, we we got people watching over there. I appreciate all you guys. Yeah, definitely.
00:42:32
Speaker
ah Yeah, I just I just I just want to I just want a safe zone when I'm running around Murray murdering people. I don't want to be called building house Yeah, just something a gay guy would do I'm fighting zombies murder you fucking murder It was it's just so random that they just banned this kid because of his town name and then they called him a lot It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's like that everywhere, man. You know, like, like my hatred towards tick tock, you know, I can go on there and do exactly what I'm doing right now and get banned because somebody says, Oh, there's nudity and b bobby bla sexual blah, blah, It's just like, um, you know, like if you scroll, if you scroll,
00:43:25
Speaker
If you scroll two lives down, there's a 12-year-old girl that has like half has like no clothes on. but She's doing a line of coke off of her dog's red lipstick rocket. But that's OK. And I can't hang out and have a conversation on TikTok. the there's There's no consistency or or no rhyme or reason for anything. I saw i like a lot of coke off dog's red. Did that manifest? Did you just manifest that right there? just That was amazing.
00:43:54
Speaker
I got a lot going on right now. I got a lot going on right now. chuck dont know by you but your algorithm's out there butd no i don't but man I got it from you,
Social Media and Online Gaming Challenges
00:44:09
Speaker
Jeff. What are you talking about? I learned it from you, Jeff.
00:44:13
Speaker
look, I I I paint pictures with words. Chaka, I'm a master of my craft. No, I noticed the other day if you because I I was I went to comment and you know, when you hit the little arrow to share it, you can hit the report button and there's they give you these presets that say as opposed to typing that he called me an ashole um you can pick and people just randomly grab something that they find offensive and be like, he's naked. No, he's not. He's got 14 hoodies on and and he's wearing overalls for fuck's sake. you Our, our, our, our chick sock count, our chick sock account is banned. A permanent band. Quote unquote. I was live and I was standing in my kitchen, fully clothed, talking about the network.
00:45:11
Speaker
and the shows and the changes and everything like that. And I was answering questions. And the next thing I know my life went dead. And I was like, what the hell? And I got a notification from TikTok. Due to nudity and sexually graphic material, I have a permanent band. And I'm like. Well, it's like I run that back real quick. There was no sexual content. I was 100 percent. You could do.
00:45:38
Speaker
You should get one of those, one of those, uh, the Muslim women wear where it only shows their eyes. Show them a picture. This is what I was dressed like. Where's the nudity?
00:45:53
Speaker
ah Yeah. Like I i think it because comes down to, we had a bunch of haters a long time ago and like you're freezing and does your driving.
00:46:04
Speaker
But we had a bunch of haters a long time ago because for some reason somebody got but hurt. And every time click would go live, he would get. somebody reported for some bullshit, but I could go live for three days straight and nobody would notice I was live because he's got more followers. Well, they don't have no AI algorithm that will read it and be like, no, there's no, no they just go off. to They don't care. Well, that's, that's a thing that's the thing. i don't Like you, I can go on your TikTok when you're live, but I can have a report just cause whatever. And you'll get, that's the thing. fred
00:46:40
Speaker
That's the thing. I mean, the video, I wasn't even live for five minutes. I appealed it because they do go back through it and quote unquote, look at it. And in less than five minutes, they sent back and said that they found that I, that, that the report was valid, whatever. And that I went against. And I'm like, there is no fucking way in hell.
00:47:05
Speaker
There was no guidelines that were crossed in here, especially for what you banned me for at the end of the day. like ah You know, if they deny you, there's nothing you can do. Like they're literally, if they're like, yep, we found, we found everything that they said is true. There's nothing you can do about it.
00:47:28
Speaker
They do the same thing on on, on, on X too. Like if they take your X down, they don't tell you why. They just say you, you broke the guidelines and then they don't ever tell you what, what you did exactly. ah You know, i agree a hundred percent chris youtube because Blaze and I did that nonsense and chilled, uh, when we were watching Terrifier three and one of our commercial breaks had a commercial that YouTube didn't like in it and it was a minute and They they gave us the option to remove that One minute clip so we did and now it's back up and running yeah, I mean as long as you don't get a strike like you guys didn't that first time you that one movie and as long as you'll get a strike which then you could just appeal the strike and take the video down and
00:48:13
Speaker
and whatever but yeah you could just trick trim the segment out so it's like all right whatever this block I'll trim it out it's not that big a deal usually like we had the same thing what I would you and and Brian were dead set on fucking playing clips for the goddamn Olympics and I kept telling you guys to stop but they I had to go through and trim like six segments out of one show because it was all olympic shit it's funny because the olympics is all over youtube that's but the thing is but NBC owns the rights in in the US and in Mexico a different company owns the rights and Canada a different company owns the rights so like if you show ones
00:48:57
Speaker
The other countries are pissed. And if you show the one in Mexico and the other, you know, us is best. It's, it's a, stupid because it's the Olympics. There's like 400,000 people there with their phones on recording it, you know, but whatever. Um, real quick while, Blake, how far are you from home? Don't do the crime. If you can't do the time, motherfucker, about that far.
00:49:24
Speaker
Okay. I'm going to go ahead and play it. Since we're still, we got one more day left and it's Halloween night. I'm going to play the Halloween mu movie theme. Uh, what is the name of the band here? It should be, uh, Leo. Leo. Probably, probably, studios. Uh, that'll give you a three minutes and 42 seconds to get home and we'll see how you get back. What drive faster. i'm um but i'm ah I'm literally getting ready to pull in. So I just got to go in and turn my laptop and all that shit on and change my klizzos. Maybe I'll do the show nude. Hmm. I'll join you. yeah let's It's a naked Wednesday night. It's a naked what the fuck news. You make it in a Jeff. From my shirt down, I have nothing on. um Two naked, yeah two naked fat guys in a Jeff.
00:50:24
Speaker
but we'll be welcome to the new show but guess Check us out everywhere bio dot link slash nonsensical network You can find all our shows on our YouTube channel, which is nonsensical network and don't forget check out our merch You know click is I think Nicki's still working on the promo code where you can buy one hoodie and get the next one half off So if your girlfriend steals it You still got one for yourself.
00:50:48
Speaker
we haven't done Myspreadshop.com and you can spread us on you and we'll be back in just a minute.
00:52:07
Speaker
are are
00:54:40
Speaker
I like that. I really do like that. Welcome back, everybody. and we It is what the fuck news. Don't forget, Mondays, Speedway Stories and Cold Blood Conversations and Men Caring for Men. Tuesdays is Glitz House Music. Wednesdays is this show, the what the fuck news. Thursdays is, every other Thursday, sorry, is Cash's Corner. Fridays is nonsense and chill. We're doing something different. we're gonna I think we're watching Top Secret.
00:55:10
Speaker
Uh, Saturdays, nonsense, nonsensical nonsense, the flagship show where we open the door and anybody and anybody can come up and chat with us. Sundays is course the foodie football show, the unnecessary roughness and Fridays. And we also do occasionally Jeff's garage when I can be bothered. Uh,
00:55:28
Speaker
that's awkward. I'm the other one that's naked.
Uber Eats Misconduct
00:55:33
Speaker
no I'm glad you're here. I see a lot of you uh a lot of new faces in the chat. I appreciate you. Welcome. Linda Raven. I see you over there. Uh Market Boutique. I appreciate you guys. Appreciate you. Yeah. Stock Explorer. What is up? I see you. What's going on? Oh my goodness. So, I have a one more story for you. No, no, no. I don't know. Click. How many stories you got?
00:56:02
Speaker
okay well I had to do one Florida one florida story at least. ah Blaze, he does Uber Eats. So an Uber Eats driver was charged in fire. Chaka, please guess why. and Now this is Florida. Charge and fired. Uber Eats driver, it's gonna be something crazy. Gotta be something crazy.
00:56:31
Speaker
Oh, it's crazy. All right. Well, first of all, he was allegedly spitting on customers and stealing their Halloween decorations in Florida. Damn. He also supposedly spent the food. So he faces multiple criminal charges after allegedly spitting in the customers face stealing portions of their food and taking seasonal decorations of customers yard during a late night delivery in Davenport, Florida. ah Alexandria Del Vala.
00:57:02
Speaker
uh she's 29. She was arrested last week and remains in custody in Central County Jail uh without eligibility for but be a bond. Good for her. Good for them. Wow. ba the Um she she's looking at like eight months in jail. That's what they're saying here.
00:57:25
Speaker
Now i've I've been seeing videos like similar to that to where that they see that they're not getting a tip and they just throw a fit and they'll throw their food and all that because they see beforehand that they're not getting a tip. maybe Maybe it could be something like that. Well you know and I think that's what it was but I actually saw a video the other day this girl did something she got all pissed and she threw dude's drink and food at the door and he's like what the hell she's like You didn't give me a tip. He's like, yeah, I was going to give you cash because I only have so much on my card. Yeah. And she was like, uh, and he's like, well, you're not getting it fucking now. She's all mad about that. Dude. And I was like, well, fuck her. what a I get it. If if you're not going to tip, okay. Yeah. Your customer's an asshole, but you're going to get in trouble for throwing their food or stealing their food. Yeah.
00:58:19
Speaker
And when did tipping become mandatory for every day? Every day. I saw a doctor's office. I saw a doctor's office where the guy came in and he went to pay for his bill and the lady's like, and how much are you going to tip me? He's like.
00:58:36
Speaker
What the fuck are we? She's like, it's a doctor's office. Exactly. You're a fucking secretary. You get a salary. Yes, but you should tip. She wouldn't give back his card. He had to call the cops because she refused to give back his credit card.
00:58:50
Speaker
Yeah. Holy **** I seen that. I see that one. Yes. I did see that one. Yeah. Did you not want to punch that **** in the face? Yes. I was putting this **** down. You better give me my card back. book But II, it's crazy. II can see food service. You know, you're getting, you're getting a a good meal. The waitress was amazing. Good. Went above and beyond. You never had to ask for nothing. Boom. You're I think things are changing my **** oil that you know, that's his job. Nobody tips me for my job. Do you guys get tipped for your job? I know. Good God. Oh, so speaking of that, if you guys want to tip, just hit that little money money button down there. You can go ahead and send a super chat. If you want to chip Dawson's Real Network, go ahead and go to Cash App. Click Click 13. GLICK. GLICK 13.
00:59:42
Speaker
so good take some advantage the network cash i saw I saw a meme the other day and and it said, if I have to stand up at a counter to order my food, you're not getting a tip. So if I go to McDonald's and you want a tip, yeah, it's not going to happen.
01:00:01
Speaker
See, somebody in my family, it wasn't my dad. It might've been one of my uncles. They would, we went to a restaurant and they would put the money out beforehand. This is your tip. Say it's 15 bucks, whatever it is. Every time they want something up, they start taking a dollar away. Boom, boom, boom. That's how he did it. Well, like the funny thing is- I used to do that back in the day when we would go to a restaurant. This is back, I was in my early 20s. I would take 21s in with me.
01:00:30
Speaker
and I would sit it down on the go to the strip club and and every time and it didn't matter if I only went into a restaurant and spent nine dollars, you know, but every time my glass got below half full, you know, if I asked for something, if it took them more than a certain amount of time, you take a dollar away. And I didn't do it to be a dick. I was like, I don't want to. If you want to tip, you got to. I want to get the hell out of here.
01:01:00
Speaker
and cap yeah Well, the funny thing is it's like tipping, restaurant tipping should not be a thing because if you look at Europe, if you go to Europe and you tip, they're like, what are you doing? Now I'm getting ready to marry somebody who's spent most of her life in the service industry. so he so we're out of ka wallas and So sometimes I'm like, yeah.
01:01:26
Speaker
like but if If the company would pay a living wage and just charge a couple extra bucks for the food, you wouldn't need a fucking tip. my My wife was a waitress too, so she gets on me about the whole tip thing also. But like I worked at a restaurant before too and the tips got spread amongst everybody there. Even if your waitress was amazing, she may have get a dollar out of that and then went to like the dishwasher, the bartender, everything. yeah yeah yeah Yeah. So tipping, I don't mind tipping, but once again, on, on certain things I don't, because it's like, yeah, you changed my oil, dude. Number one, I wouldn't have somebody much change my oil. But as you were saying, I'm not going to tip you for, there's nothing make more that i do will change your love for you I didn't say there's anything wrong with it, but I'm going to do it myself because I can play with my tool. I can do it myself, Jeff. I'm busy.
01:02:18
Speaker
i i live you i stay all day i mean what do you really do look i you know i i went from home i can take a break any time in the day be like fuck I don't have time. When you're a champ like me, you can't lower yourself.
Fantasy Football and 3D Printing
01:02:34
Speaker
just to you peasants and change my or you saying you're saying you're saying you're saying that I better with dream i hope you're I hope your head gasket blows and then you're like oh yeah i and say I am saying I am better than you I am saying I'm better than you I be grateful for what yeah having done i am very grateful that I can go to Valvolina be in and out of there in 10 minutes and slap my I can do it look what I can do it intended It doesn't take, it's changing the oil. Yeah, but it's also gonna cost me 500 times more the money to have you do it. How do you figure? Because you live in Cancun and I live in Ohio. Well, duh. You have to get the car to Cancun first. computer It's just a short drive, don't worry about it. All right, Nicky, I'll be back in three weeks. I'm going to get the oil changed. It's actually like three and a half weeks to get here, don't worry about it.
01:03:28
Speaker
but There goes my vacation for the entire year on one oil chain. And then you got to change it when you get home. you just drove yeah yeah I'll just. MK says, is this a wrestling skit or something? But Glick does have a championship belt. I do have a championship. I have, I actually have three of them. i have That will soon be mine, brother.
01:03:51
Speaker
ah That will soon be mine, brother. A good one's still out in my car. Would you put up the... Would you put up one of the belts for something? No. I'm coming for that. no I that one. Well, if if everything goes well for me... This is the custom-made belt that i that I paid to have made. Yeah. let's But the good ones out in the car, because this one was kind of a faulty one. Actually, now that Nicki can do designs and stuff. Yeah, you can add to it. You got to make a new. I'm going to make a new logo for that one. I've been my favorite. bell Everybody's showing up in chat today. Damn. Yeah. Wednesdays is awesome. You know, if everything goes well. You know what that is.
01:04:44
Speaker
Gay. Got it.
01:04:50
Speaker
the smoking scal absolutely know i say I'm buying a 3D printer and for our fantasy football league, I've already designed a it looks like the Super Bowl trophy, but it says nonsensical network fantasy football league and whoever wins. ah There's there's a guy that I found on. I didn't find I just came across it on Facebook market. It doesn't here in town 15 bucks. Yeah.
01:05:19
Speaker
And what would you guys do? Just like send them over to the whoever the winner is and then keep moving it? Yeah, whoever the winner is. Well, i if I buy a 3D printer, I'll send a new one out each year. mr sta pan And it'll have the data on it. Because one of the things I want to learn how to do as well is I want to her want to learn how to like electroplate so I can make it look like gold. That'd be cool.
01:05:43
Speaker
You just use zinc and copper, and you electroplate it. You got to spray it, you spray paint it with a special kind of ah like electrifiable paint, and you dip it in the in the liquid and run electric through it with two, with a plate of copper, and it will eat the copper away from the copper plating and put it on the the equipment. It's really cool process.
01:06:07
Speaker
Thank you arkans you with a $10 bomb. I appreciate it. Look at that sauce. Look at you girl. You didn't have to do that. Appreciate you take time. But yeah, it's it's the process is really cool.
01:06:20
Speaker
now you Do you have a 3D printer? You said? No, I want to buy one. but one i you buy one You got to do videos on that because that's interesting. Oh, I'm going to. I'm actually the one I'm looking at and look at the Creality K1 Max. It does a 300 centimeters by 300 millimeters by 300 by 300. So you can print an entire Ironman helmet in a single setting. Speaking of of fantasy football,
01:06:48
Speaker
You wanna take a break and then we can come back and do our recap of fantasy football? I don't know where we're at on time. i know We're about an hour in. i'm different ah Yeah, we can. We literally just played a break while you were changing and getting on. why I didn't know where you were on time. I wasn't paying attention to when you took a break. If you over if you over if you're over in ah if you're over in my chat, don't don't forget to go ah subscribe to Arkansas. She gave me that.
01:07:14
Speaker
really done yeah Yeah, there you go. Are you done with your stories there, Jeffrey? I am, I am. So we usually do this every Wednesday. Some of you guys may not know. Some of you guys may know we have a podcast, uh, fantasy football league, which we will be looking to grow next year. So any of you fantasy football players out there, let me know, let us know. I want to get a max of 12, max of 12 teams.
01:07:45
Speaker
yeah we can If we can max out the 12 teams, and i was really close surprised obviously, as Jeff mentioned, which I mean, this year, if I got to spend the 15, 20 bucks or whatever it is to have a guy make the trophy, I'll do it this year. And you want to worry about Jeff, if you don't have your printer by the end of the season. Yeah, if I don't have my printer by then, yeah. But there will also be a prize pack that goes along with it as soon as we max out our league. But we did have we did have games this week. We'll check this out.
01:08:14
Speaker
This is how big I'm printing it. I have to glue it all together once it's printed. Oh, shit. You're doing the whole fucking thing. Yeah, the guy here does a full size replica of the Lombardi trophy. This is actually bigger than the Lombardi trophy. No, that's a bit much, especially if we're going to have to be. It's fine. I did the math. It's going to take, like, I think 19 hours to print. Yeah, you're always overcompensating for your short stature.
01:08:44
Speaker
I don't care. um so this looks be It'll be, it'll be about a little bit. No, I don't. That's the crazy thing. So you don't even know if that's bigger or smaller because you have no idea. All I know is I've measured it out to be about a little over a foot and a half tall.
01:09:02
Speaker
Well, it's it's way smaller than the Lombardi. Is it really? OK, yeah, that is that is a nonsensical size of a trophy right there. Yeah, that's what your kids get when they win T-ball championship. Well, fine, I'll make it bigger. I know you won't have to. I'm going to. I'll buy I'll buy the one from the guy you buy this one this year's and the next year I can change it. You can just you can just.
01:09:29
Speaker
Print the name plate because it comes with the slots to drop the and the engine actually sure it comes with the extra name Well different prints ready to go as soon as i got the print I have one it's it's gonna be about three feet tall a Bomb this says f-bomb on
01:09:54
Speaker
Are those things are they super crazy expensive? ah The one I'm looking at the Creality K1 max is 1000 bucks. my amazon Oh, that's not bad at all. rob bill The filament will cost you about 15 to 20 bucks a roll. And how long does it roll last? Like, you know, you're gonna blow whole roll out on on there on that one trophy? No, no on bit with 15 rolls of filament, you can print an entire Iron Man suit that you can wear.
01:10:22
Speaker
Okay. So you enough the the problem is, is when they print, you have to sand it and paint it. You know, you got to, you got to do a little body work to it, but anything you could think of there, there's, uh, there's eight different websites that I use and you'll find a whole bunch of stuff. And then you can scale it to any size. I can make that F bomb that big, but I wanted a big one so I can hang it up on my thing. That's pretty cool. So yeah, I just play with them.
01:10:52
Speaker
technology trick anyway that that's that's crazy that's mut to thing The other thing with the Creality K1 Max, it's one of those printers that you don't have to worry about fiddling. Like if you buy a cheap one, you can buy one for like 200 bucks. The problem is you got to know how it works and how to fuck with it and how to get, because you got to fiddle with it. With the K1 Max, you just set it and forget it. And it'll only fuck up like once every like 50 prints.
01:11:18
Speaker
And MK said that's going to be expensive to ship to his house. and what who did Yeah, where's where Well, you can't where you located. Yeah, where you located? He's like in the sports with a pet wolf. That's the type of duty is. I'm not even kidding, but but it's like one of those things where the depending on how you set it up, set up the print, they're almost hollow.
01:11:45
Speaker
I mean, they got, they got, you know, you can't squish them, but they, they have like a mesh inside. So they're not solid. So it doesn't weigh a lot. So it's literally just comes down to size the package. Like that F bomb that I'm printing in my weight, two pounds, but it'll be almost three feet tall. Yeah. Wow. But yeah, I got, I think I have, um,
01:12:14
Speaker
The F-bomb takes 10 prints just to print out. now Yeah, I see MK's in Southern Oregon in the woods. That's no big deal. Well, if you if you're anything like Jeff, we won't ever have to worry about sending the trophy to you. Yeah, I agree because I suck at this. These are the prints I have ready to go.
01:12:38
Speaker
I have this. I think it's the water free time that you could have been used to help grow the social media. This actually spells out nonsensical nonsense. And it is each letter is a foot tall. I'm so busy. I'm over here doing 3d prints. I can't post on social media. Yeah. Well, I work on this at like three o'clock in the morning. social I don't know if you're aware of this, but social media doesn't close. It's not like,
01:13:07
Speaker
You know, from, from midnight to 9 AM social media is closed or anything. Sure it is. But yeah, get into this, this, uh, fantasy footy football, because shit, I got to do my team for this month, this week. I actually, I got close to beating you. I'm kind of impressed with myself. Yeah, but did you, uh, so Connor was on a Bible week. He got back to his, he got back to his, uh, winning ways, if you will.
01:13:37
Speaker
Um, he, he, he beat the Hammond acres. Um, Justin smacked the dog shit out of Derek and almost scored 200 fucking fantasy points, one 80 to one Oh three. Uh, cam beat Brian one 30 to one 19 and in the champ versus dusty Spunks. I was down by a point at the end of Sunday night's game.
01:14:07
Speaker
And I still had, uh, Russell Wilson of Pittsburgh. Yeah. I had Russell Wilson of Pittsburgh, so I only needed to get him to get me like a point and a half. Well, he got me 14 points. So check you are still, and um, mopping up the sellers in the standings. Uh, you are above the, the bi-week team, the Hammond, Eggers, the keggers.
01:14:34
Speaker
Uh, who, who are rightfully on eight, you're sitting at two and six, uh, Derek and Connor are tied for i fall back for a more dramatic win. And then you keep saying that, but you're not winning. And we're almost, it wouldn't be dramatic if it was one or two. It's, it's, it's almost completely out of reach. You have a 2% chance of making the playoffs.
01:15:00
Speaker
You'd be surprised. what like There is a chance, but there is a chance. There there there is a choice. Derek and Connor are tied for fifth at four and four. Brian and Cam are tied for third at five and three. And Justin and I are tied for first at six and two. Um,
01:15:28
Speaker
This week coming up, I am on a bi-week and I was kind of freaking out because half my roster is on a bi this week. And I'm like, the fuck am I going to do? And then I realized I get the bi-week. So I'm not that worried.
01:15:41
Speaker
had Well, I am, I have to run my team. Yeah. Cam is going up against, uh, Connor. Uh, if there was ever a week for you to win, it would be this week. And that would be, uh,
01:15:55
Speaker
Awesome. If you could do that for me, if you could, uh, beat Justin, so I could take first place solely. And then Derek and, uh, I mean, either way, I'm still going to be tied for first place. If you take a dive or not. Uh, and Derek and Brian are going at it. Um, you have the playoffs were to start today.
01:16:20
Speaker
The playoff racket in the first round of the championship would be Justin and Brian and then Cam and me. Which one are you guys using? ESPN. ESPN one. So right now I am projected at 121.
01:16:42
Speaker
As far as the rest of fantasy football goes for me because I am in three leagues. um in my personal league, the money league that I'm in. I am on a five game win streak. And I am sitting nice and comfy in first place. Well, you got to understand when I play, I literally the only time I look at it is on Wednesdays when we talk about. And then and then my and then the other league that I'm in. Shout out to Tony. bla in the week i Forget it exists. Shout out to Tony D in the.
01:17:18
Speaker
Belt Kings fantasy football. um
01:17:24
Speaker
This is still a clusterfuck is the name of my team because this league is still a clusterfuck. I am tied for first place in that one too, with a six game win streak. I lost the first two because I had to, I had to, I had to free agency build, man. Tony D is not a very good commission. He's three years in and he's still learning. So.
01:17:44
Speaker
Um, but I had to, I lost the first two weeks and then I won the last six in a row rather convincingly, just smacking the dog shit out of everybody that I come across at this point. Um, I'd be Brian by 36 points this week. Nice.
01:18:06
Speaker
Uh, but, uh, yeah, so there's your, your little nonsensical nonsense fantasy football league recap. Uh, we do got a few more weeks, uh, before playoffs start playoffs start week 15, I believe. When do the playoffs start? Yes. Week 15. So Got a couple more weeks. jeffrey you You missed my plan and told my plan is not getting the playoffs because I'm forced to play in the fucking first place. I barely pay attention. Well, you're still going to, I mean, whether you get to the playoffs or not, you're still going to be forced to play every year. Oh, I know.
01:18:50
Speaker
But that way I don't have to worry about the fucking playoffs. I'm doing, I set up my team. I had, the problem is I literally just went through and set up my team for this week. And the best I can do is 122.3 points. That's all the projection. You don't, that don't mean nothing. I had fucking CD lamb and Travis Kelsey put up 80 points for me. Two guys. Well, maybe I'll get lucky.
01:19:15
Speaker
Two weeks in a row in my two weeks, two weeks in my, and in a row, Nikki, who has a team filled with basically Pittsburgh Steelers have damn near tripled what her other guys have done. ah you The projections don't mean nothing. I mean, cause you can have a guy about that. Absolutely. Yeah. Oh yeah. I mean, yeah. I mean, just you, you know, guy could absolutely go out. Like I said, CD lamb got 40 points this week.
01:19:41
Speaker
Travis Kelsey. I had basically everybody on every one of my rosters get 20 plus points this week. Well, I'm calling it right now. Hey, MK, stick around. Matty's quarterback. He's going to score me 100 points on this one. Jay Burrow. He's going to score me 100 points. Why not? Joe Burrow spends more time on his ass than he does throwing footballs. Maybe I'll get lucky.
01:20:10
Speaker
Oh, he's the best one I got. He's 18 projected 18. No, however, I was talking, however, however, I was talking to a Nikki son, Jay, uh, who was home from the military this weekend and when we were in PA. That's why we went to PA and he's in a couple of fantasy leagues. And I'm going to have to get with him next year because they have a dual quarterback league. So they have two quarterbacks that start. Oh, in well that's that's different. yeah Yeah. So I'm like, hell yeah. you tri that digit Oh yeah. I'm like, hell yeah. And they got a 10 team lead and there's like no QBs left. I mean, like, if you go look at free agency, it's, it's all like third string guy ah and Anthony Richardson. Well, so you have, you basically have to pick your quarterbacks for the year yeah and hope none of them get hurt. Sounds like a lot of work.
01:21:07
Speaker
So I'm going to, I want to look into doing on that next year. Cause I think that'll be cool. having You got two quarterbacks, two running backs, two wide receivers, tight end flex and defense. So you just add a quarterback, which I got to play both of my quarterbacks this week in my leagues.
01:21:28
Speaker
So, I'm worried about **** You guys start up your fantasy football. Do you announce it on your channel or or do you do? Yeah, we we actually did this year. We did the draft alive. Oh, sick. That's cool. So, it was literally the entire time you just stared at the top of our heads because we're ah and we're talking awesome us also also also in in in in the defense of of Jeff and who else who is in there live with us connor It was Cam.
01:22:03
Speaker
I know Cam. They don't really know. They don't really know anything about football. So I couldn't be like... I know how to gameplay, but you could put, you could put 40 football players in front of me and I wouldn't know which one was which. Unless they're wearing that jersey. I knew Travis Kelsey is because I see him all over the fucking tick-tock all the time. So it's not like we could... And next to him an elevator and not realizing.
01:22:28
Speaker
we We couldn't sit there and have conversations about players and picks and everything like that because they're like, oh, well, guys, he's just projected to be really good this year. That's all I look for. I was like, he's got some points for him. I'm taking him. Yeah, I would like to play because I'm a co-founder, but I do. I do enjoy it. But like right now I'm super busy. What up, Wilma? How are you doing? I have to go back to work.
01:22:57
Speaker
Yeah, projections don't mean shit. You got to know the players and know the match. Like, like we talked about, I picked up Tracy Tyrone Jr. from the Giants. He's the backup running back a few weeks ago. Devin Singletary was hurt. Giants are ass. But I looked at the matchup and I told the guys on the football show, I said, homeboys go to get at least 25 points, two tuddies. And they're like, you're out of your fucking mind. Cause nobody knew who he was. I was just talking out of my ass.
01:23:24
Speaker
Like I normally do. Oh boy. Got two times in over a hundred yards rushing. He got 26 fucking points and he just went out against the Steelers as well. I will say if I ever win the whole fucking lot, no one will ever hear the end of it. As long as I'm still breathing, you want to do one dude you want to talk about championship belt? I will make one the size of this wall.
01:23:49
Speaker
I beat everybody in fantasy football and I will never let these fuckers live it out on their on their graves. I will be like I still beat you in fantasy football and you died before me. Fuck you. Just saying.
01:24:06
Speaker
I'm just saying as long as I'm still breathing, you'll never win. You say that now, but I'm going to find me a football expert in my neighborhood and be like, dude,
01:24:19
Speaker
Do it. Jeff, I pray for you to find a football expert in your neighborhood. You know why? Because you live in Mexico and you're going to say football and they're going to think soccer. no no no no There's a guy there's why every weekend right down the road. All he does is watch American football all day long and I'm like you're wearing a soccer jersey right now.
01:24:39
Speaker
Yeah, because it was free. They gave it to me to pack a beer, man. I was like, what did they really? It was his son, his son out. They did these weird promos at the stores. And I was like, free shirt. I'll buy some beer. I've done the same thing. Free shirt. I'll take. What is that? shit yes whi what what you got there I a. i I've got i'm just spend six dollars on your bullshit whiskey just to get him a free $10. I almost bought three liters of coke, like three, two and a half liters of coke today, because it came with a dipping plate for like your chips and salsa. And I was like, yeah I really need that much coke. I really like that different. I mean, it was plastic. I could have 3D printed it or used a plate, but I was like,
01:25:29
Speaker
yeah I really do. That's a true story. I think I spent probably about 70 bucks on a whiskey because it came with a shirt and I like the design, but the whiskey was trash. But the end of the shirt, the shirt was cool though. It was at least X amount of proof. So you could use it for lighter fluid. It got you drunk, but it just wasn't, it wasn't, it was a mixer. it was a mixer
01:25:52
Speaker
co kingine's a hell of a dru yeah which i was go to buy three pounds of cocaine just get a fucking so also play just to get that **** fake tattoo sticker. yeah Freeze, freeze. No, my dad, my dad, you know, you My dad was, you know, like he was a plumber all his life, and he'd go to all these ah the supply shops that they they'd be like, we got our new products. And he's like, you guys got a hat? And they're like, yeah, where you go?
Misunderstandings and Unconventional Ideas
01:26:26
Speaker
Dude would come home with like 50 hats. He had a wall just with hats. And I think he wore one of them. Yeah. Well, JR, it is justifiable mistake. He does live in Mexico, so he very well could be talking about cocaine.
01:26:44
Speaker
like I never know. I thought it was a watermelon.
01:26:50
Speaker
a
01:26:55
Speaker
no ah know was gonna Oh, speaking of the temporary tattoos, like Chaka just said, I see a real on YouTube the other day, this chick was like, they should do temporary tattoos on the inside of condoms. That way, when you're done doing the little, you take the condom off and boom, purple dragon right on your dick.
01:27:14
Speaker
no i'm not a match a good idea i was telling nii about it i was like i would start wearing condoms on top with that On top of that the nonenical nonsense go nonsense a tattooable condom I really, Jeff, no, because then we already we we are like the disclaimer we already have to put the disclaimer on the show when we drop the link in the chat. Please put your penis away next. Now they're going to be like, well, but I've got links on your fucking car.
01:27:45
Speaker
ah Unfortunately, there's some people that can't fit the nonsensical nonsense network. It's just going to say no. It's all good. No. No. that joke oh do When I'm hard, it says welcome to the USS Mississippi. yeah but but now I'm not. It's just the initial.
01:28:08
Speaker
me
01:28:11
Speaker
But that that actually is a pretty fucking solid idea. That's pretty cool. I think it's great. How cool would that be? I'm kind of Trojan, boys. give me like ah there You want to see the purple dragon?
Penis Stories Segment
01:28:27
Speaker
In cases, you guys are not the thought I have when about to have sex. Sorry. No sale. Yeah, I agree, MK. And I don't want the thought of my logo on your dick. You know, another person. Maybe just a QR code on the head. I'm just saying. That way, when you send a dick pic, they can scan it.
01:28:49
Speaker
I'm an idea guy. We're just saying. we're Yeah, we're definitely we're definitely not on the same page here. I mean, like, maybe like... maybe like I was freaking out. I was thinking, is he going to scan? Is he going to scan my QR code? yeah get those Did I freeze?
01:29:11
Speaker
and I know you get to those those guys that send those weird dick pics all the time, you know, and then one time he gets laid, then sends dick pics. Look at Arkansas. She said she'll be right back. And then we start talking about dick pics. She's like, never mind. I'm not going to go yet. Wait a minute. Hold on. Just getting interested. Idea man. so like Did somebody say dick pics?
01:29:37
Speaker
you're switch to che fells Speaking of penises, Glick, it's about that time for the penis stories of the week.
01:29:49
Speaker
because we're about an hour and 22 into it. No, usually doing about an hour and 45. You guys do pit stories a week? Every Wednesday. Dude, we did one week. The first time we did one, Glick told these, you know, it was like a top 10 weird dick stories or something like that. And then the next week we finished it and we didn't do it. People got pits, dude. No, the reason that's...
01:30:15
Speaker
The reason I started doing the Buzzfeed list was because there was a couple of weeks in a row where I had news stories about, like there was this dude in India that sat down on his toilet and a snake was pulled up in the bowl and jumped up and latched onto his penis. Then there was something about a guy shoving a USB cord and stuff in his pee hole. My favorite one, my favorite penis story, was this OnlyFans chick.
01:30:44
Speaker
This only fans chick invited a guy over to film content. And when they got done, she's like, I'm going to go take a shower. Well, she didn't mention to the guy that she had a she didn't mention to the guy that she had a 10 foot python in the house. Well, he's laying in the bed still somewhat semi hard. Here comes this fucking snake just slithering away. And he goes, just like you write the whole thing in his mouth. He thrown it is junk.
01:31:14
Speaker
Damn. So, uh, and then I didn't do it. Then I didn't do a penis story for a couple of weeks. And in the chat, they're like, yo, where's the fucking stories? So it just become a mandatory thing on Wednesday night. So I started going to, uh, Buzzfeed and I love Buzzfeed. Shout out to Buzzfeed. No affiliation. Just shout out to them because they do some great lists and they always reach out to their, their readers and their, their followers to, to send in the responses.
01:31:43
Speaker
And they've got a ton of penis stories. I don't even remember where we left off last week. I got to give a shout out to Arkansas for the $2 donations. She says she is here for the pics.
01:31:58
Speaker
A little disclaimer, you will be disappointed. Yeah. hundred You can look at your pinky and get the same effect. I'm just saying.
01:32:10
Speaker
No, but like we did. We did one where this guy, he, I can't remember what he did, but he split his dick, like peeled it like a banana. Wow. it was He was having sex. She had a goddamn vice script vagina and just peeled it. Another guy, another guy cut it in half when he was riding a BMX bike with no seat on. And that rusty little, we did that one story where that the guy in, in Asia,
01:32:40
Speaker
had his dick cut off, and then he served it at a dinner. but You guys have a plethora of food stories. Like two grand a pop. Oh, yeah, dude. i the the current The current list we're on right now is, and and Jeff, we can take a break and then we can come back. The current list we're on now is 15 hookup stories from people who have had sex with a micro penis. And just so you guys know, so I don't have to, the average penis size is about five inches.
01:33:09
Speaker
to constitute a micropenis would be half that. So about two and a half inches erect is a micropenis. Interesting us. I'm 2.3 correct. I'm 2.3 erect. What are you gonna do? Most days it looks like a turtle peeking its head out through the bushes.
01:33:31
Speaker
MK said he would hate to see your guys in search history. Oh, you have no idea, buddy. You have no idea. This is this is what the fuck news. Like I said, it became a mainstay because it was asked for. And I was like, well, I guess I'm going to be known as the guy who does penis stories on podcasting. At least I'm known for something. Let's go. you talking So when we're going to say the stories I'm just saying.
01:33:58
Speaker
Joe Rogan's got drunk, we got dicks. I'm just saying. Some might say it's the same thing. Yeah. If anybody wanted to ask. I mean, Nazi penises, then the left would say we were them. Yeah. We gotta take a real quick break.
01:34:16
Speaker
um Once again, you can file it, follow us at bio dot links slash nonsensical network and find all the penis stories. And, uh, what do we got here? what's the last You know what we haven't done. All right. We still have Alan music on there. All right. Well, I know but you got, well, I was going to do wicked woman, but it's so long. I want to do a nightmare for Christmas. yeah oop That's on there.
01:34:45
Speaker
uh that noise is i oh yeah that's that's that's our boys our last night this is this i don't like the movie but i like this version of the song so we're gonna go ahead and play this and we'll be back in three minutes and 16 seconds
Music Break and Podcast Updates
01:38:04
Speaker
What's up everyone? Thanks for checking out our latest cover. We really hope you liked it. We're posting videos every single month so make sure you subscribe to our YouTube channel Yeah, there we don't need to hear that. so I like is that. Halloween. I like that version. What's the name of the band is our last night. Our last night. Check them out. They do a lot of really cool punk like punk emo covers. Uh, they, they did a killer cover of Morgan Wallens last night. oh I've talked to him about coming on the show, but, uh,
01:38:38
Speaker
they kind of blew up overnight and got super busy with touring and everything like that. So they're like, play our music. Hell yeah, that's awesome. And if we ever have time, how cool are that? we If you had ah somebody on your show, then the next day, all of a sudden, there's the biggest thing. since why not And then you just had them on last night. That'd be awesome.
01:38:59
Speaker
Well, actually, we're kind of in that boat a little bit. We got the Southern Outlaws Band. They're starting to blow up, like you read about. They're number two on that list. They've been blown up. They've been blown up. Excellent, excellent musicians on your channel. So props to you, because they're... I don't know where you find them. They're all really good. It's my algorithm. Yeah. And they're just cool enough to be like, yeah.
01:39:28
Speaker
because google is It's all different. It's all fart jokes and stuff like that. You go to my Instagram and it's nothing but cars. and yeah But yeah, welcome back everybody to the nonsensical nonsense show we call what the fuck news all that is news. All the news that is news that makes you say what the fuck.
01:39:53
Speaker
um Once again, Monday's Speedway Stories and Cold-Blooded Conversations had a great time with Chris the other day, and the Men Caron for Men show, one right after the other. Tuesday's Clicks House Music, like we were just talking about. Wednesday's is this show, what the fuck news? but Every other Thursday, not this Thursday, next Thursday, everything goes correctly, is Cash's Corner where they talk rattling.
01:40:18
Speaker
Uh, Fridays is nonsense and chill where we watch movies, kind of do a commentary track, so to speak about it. And then Saturdays is nonsensical nonsense. The open door challenge, the flagship show, the original, where the crazy people take over and we just kind of roll with it for six hours. And then Sunday's unnecessary roughness and occasionally Jeff's garage. And Jr. Diddy ain't got nothing.
01:40:47
Speaker
on a nonsensical party we make that look like amateur hour yeah not the fucking without the fuck well i still got dudes locked in cages from the last way i mean what this just
01:41:03
Speaker
i
01:41:07
Speaker
Go for it. Go run. Go ahead. I'll wait. Dudes in cages. Dig that hole. I'm not digging a hole, Jeff. I'm making us famous. a Word gets out. All of a sudden they're like,
01:41:19
Speaker
Diddy was the same compared to those nonsense. We should, we should investigate them. Next thing you know, we got news crews all up our asses. We become the next biggest bike and they don't find anything. Cause there's
Micro Penis Discussion
01:41:28
Speaker
nothing to find. Cause what they realized is I go to work and come home and don't do much else. yeah Never leave your house until they check our algorithms and go, wow, you guys got to learn some weird shit.
01:41:38
Speaker
yeah we look like a wild dude it's notical Now, just because I was on the show a couple of times, they're gonna be like, they're gonna find out that I'm free.
01:41:52
Speaker
Guilty by g GBA. Guilty by association, Chaka. Speaking of Diddy, I saw something on on online today. What do you want me to do? You know how when you have black plastic on your car and it starts to get faded? Yeah.
01:42:10
Speaker
Well, they say, at least according to this video, that if you use baby oil and rub on it, it'll shine again. And I was like, Oh, that's what did he was doing? He was, he's just a car guy. Got it. Of course, Johnny. Yeah. It's like tire shine, but cheaper. Did he break news? Yeah. But yeah, we are ready for the ah penis.
01:42:38
Speaker
Gather around, campers. Penis.
01:42:47
Speaker
pain Penis. That from a penis story. Yeah. I love that one. That would make me laugh so much.
01:43:06
Speaker
Oh, girl she had never she was she was a gold star lesbian. And the first time she did a three-way, she didn't know what to do with the dick. So her friend was like firmly grasping in your head. No, she she that's what she said out loud. And then her and her girlfriend wound up getting married. And the guy they had the threesome with turned out to be the best man at the wedding.
01:43:26
Speaker
And when he stood up at the wedding to give his speech, he said, everyone, please ah grab your your champagne glasses and firmly grasp them in your hands. Only the three of them knew what was going on. And the two tribes passed out from laughing. So this week, as I said, we're going to we're going to wrap up this list is top 15 stories
01:43:55
Speaker
Top 15 hookup stories from people who have had sex with a micro penis. And this is from BuzzFeed. Again, i'm I'm a fan of BuzzFeed. We're not affiliated with them yet. Maybe one day. I'm a huge fan of BuzzFeed, not just because of the penis stories. They do a lot of really cool stuff on BuzzFeed. um They actually do a much better job with music countdowns than fucking Rolling Stones. Rolling Stones magazine can go to hell because your list of shit. Oh, they're dog shit.
01:44:24
Speaker
we just met one we were we were talking about the the We did a music list from from Rolling Stones and it was just so out there. We were we we were disgusted by the time we got through it. Yeah. ah Anyways, these are the 15 stories that deal with micro penises. And Elizabeth writes, in one night I got high with an ex's friend that led to us hooking up. When his pants came off,
01:44:53
Speaker
I saw that his penis was no bigger than the size of my phone. Maybe smaller, Elizabeth says. Luckily, he was amazingly talented with his fingers. So we ended up getting up to so are we ended up getting so passionate that we fell off the bed and onto his guitar, which then he played in my ear while we kissed. To this day, it was one of the most romantic one night stands I've ever had. Small penis and guitar douchebag guy.
01:45:23
Speaker
Hey that's kind of like when you lose your hearing your other senses pick up you know small dick you learned other skills play the shit out of that guitar yeah well that's my head that's why I have racing stripes in my beard small penis but I excel in other areas I'm a champion taco eater Thomas said, can you classify? I don't think he was here, but can you kind classify what micro is clarified? So average genus size and yeah the average penis size is five inches. ah Hard is two and a half is considered micro by the experts.
01:46:09
Speaker
so Yeah. how How would you like that on your resume? I'm an expert in micro penises. Like, well, well you yeah you're not you're not an expert in my like a urologist expert. Yeah, you're like a euro or a sex doctor or something like that. if i If I was if I was a urologist, that's what I would put. I mean, I have a master's in micro penises. Thomas is going to get a ruler right now.
01:46:35
Speaker
shift shoot wait one i checked on great but i checked on break just to make i was like yes yes nice
01:46:50
Speaker
I don't need to check. I just stuck in my gut. No, you're still there. Yeah. I suck it in for a minute. Yeah, it's still there. They might be Thomas. I don't know and I I don't keep up with my my my LGBTQ calendar. Yeah. Oh, you're bro.
01:47:07
Speaker
you know i'll call my brester and ask him her for him whatever yeah um This might have be a story that Nikki wrote in because it says Amish girl.
01:47:24
Speaker
I tease my fiance and comes across a little behind a little, a little behind the scenes. I tease my fiance who's from originally born and raised in PA that she's Amish, that everybody in PA was Amish up until like 10 years ago. So Amish girl writes in, it was my first time hooking up with someone after, uh, after opening up my relationship. The guy was so good at oral, but oral isn't really my jam. Oh, okay. This is definitely not Nikki.
01:47:53
Speaker
ah so weird What's that? That chick is like, world's not my jam. You're a weirdo or whoever you're doing it with doesn't doing it right. Amish girl says, so I dropped hints about wanting to take things further. He pulled down his pants and I can hardly see his penis. I ended up on top and just had to sort of grind. Since it was too small to bounce.
01:48:25
Speaker
He knew how to work his fingers, though. So no complaints for me. So he was great at a world, but you don't like a world, but his fingers clearly bigger than his penis. So if and now right he's going to stumble upon this channel and and be like, wait a minute. I remember that. I remember that. Basically, he was a great bowler.
01:48:51
Speaker
Yeah. He called him Mr. Brunswick. I'm just saying. Teeny weeny party is in order. I have a shirt that says TPG, which stands for tiny pecker gang. I am the founder and president of.
01:49:09
Speaker
so It's not only the president, he's a guy. Founder and president. uh salina writes in she says i dated a guy who i had known in high school but we didn't hook up until years later when we got together he was all about taking care of me and he was amazing when we finally did have sex he gave me a warning that he wasn't very big this horse says i've seen plenty of wieners
01:49:47
Speaker
yeah I hope you can say it out loud to him. but He's like, gee, that's more. du Hey, forget about it. And I've seen plenty of penises. Why is she Italian all of a but but so Yeah, I've seen a lot of penises. Why is she Christopher Walken all of a sudden? I know.
01:50:19
Speaker
ah so So anyway, she says, I've seen plenty of wieners before and wasn't worried about it. Unfortunately, it was no bigger than my pinky. While I could barely feel anything, that's because you've had so many wieners. in you like throw hot down day It's not it's not his fault. You got huge fucking pinkies, lady.
01:50:41
Speaker
your Pinky looks like a fucking baby. arms Yeah, big ass man hands for. She said, well, I can barely feel anything during actual penetration. He was great about taking care of me afterwards. You know, I don't know. You know what?
01:51:04
Speaker
Maybe maybe next week. I'll do the research, Thomas. Thomas, I'll do the research for you and next week. We'll we'll we'll compare penises around the world. Didn't we do that before? I think we might have. We do a lot of penises. We talk a lot about penises on this network. ah madie ryan The lady with the back game now decides to talk shit now.
01:51:28
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. She's got the pinky of Andre the Giant or whatever. It's not my fault you got elephantitis or the pinky. It's average size, lady. It's three inches. ah Anybody want to be a nut?
01:51:54
Speaker
um Maddie writes in. And she says, I hooked up with a guys who a guy whose penis was about an inch long. It looked as skinny as a stick. I mean, you know sticks come in lots of different sizes. I was going to say, that's not a great comparison, Jesus. Yeah. but when he But when we started to have sex, it actually wasn't bad. He was able to make it feel good. I hadn't had much experience at the time.
01:52:25
Speaker
Yeah. Well, I mean, she said she said she hadn't had much experience at the time. So I get it. Yeah. So his penis made it a lot easier for me to try a bunch of different positions. I don't know how many different positions you were trying with an inch penis. All right.
01:52:44
Speaker
Cause it just doesn't like one of those white chicks have got no ass. Well, that's why I was thinking like, if he was yeah, she was like a two by four super skinny. Cause you can flip them, smack them down, reverse them, spin them around. You can do all kinds of shit. Um, I don't regret it at all because I got to learn and he still made everything nice, even with being so little. A lot of these stories are very positive for us. That's the well-endowed gentlemen.
01:53:13
Speaker
Yeah, she's really letting him down easy. That reminds me of a TikTok I've just seen. It was a dude fixing something. He's a plumber. He was fixing something. And is his buddy asked him for his measuring tape. And he gives him the measuring tape. And he kept coming up with the wrong measurement. He's like, dude, where did you get this measuring tape? those are the one This is the one I found in the living room. He's like, that's my wife's measuring tape. And then he gave it to his wife. And he goes like, one, five, nine. And it's all fucked up. Yeah, we don't use this when it's broken.
01:53:43
Speaker
That was broken.
01:53:48
Speaker
ah Yeah, one more thing. Well, I mean, I do all right. Sometimes she just confirmed it's not about the size of the fish. It's all about how he swims. It's not how deep your fish is, how you wiggle your worm. Uh, miss Mara writes in and she says, I once dated a guy who was gorgeous.
01:54:13
Speaker
But he kept acting a bit odd whenever my hands went near his crotch area. Maybe he was molested by a Catholic preacher. Or has crabs. Or has crabs. Both very possible. The girl reached down his pants and couldn't find it. His was so small that you could barely see it. It was literally the size of the tip of my finger. Wow.
01:54:43
Speaker
ah Yeah, looks don't help. Maybe he ain't got nothing to play with. Yeah. Uh, he was embarrassed, but I tried to get over it and we did things other than sex. It was a real shame because all the other stuff we did was great. But he was so caught up with his micropenis that it made it hit, made him freeze whenever we got intimate. We broke up after a few months.
01:55:09
Speaker
And part of it was due to our sexual incompatibility, which was unfortunate, unfortunate, because he really fancied him. She didn't even mind his small penis. He had a good personality. He did. Yeah, they had they had good conversations. It's a shame.
01:55:29
Speaker
These people are so mature about it. Like, where are the stories where the girl's like, no. Yeah. but Well, Jeff, I could tell you a couple personal stories.
01:55:43
Speaker
Then they woke up the next day chloroformed in a cage. Oh, wait, what? I just said, George, does it smell like chloroform? They woke up in my basement. They may or may not be there.
01:56:01
Speaker
thinking the woman that wrote are all ugly. yeah you know That's a valid point, Thomas. They are. I never thought of it that way. In my head, when when these stories are read, in my head, that's the way that they're coming out. like That one looks like the controller under the bridge with huge thumbs that's just poking up food in your mouth.
01:56:24
Speaker
yeah i got small penis you won't notice because's ge lowerer bla and inovating touch probably not you far yeah ah but there Sarah writes in she said I met a guy who tender She said he she and didn't even realize he had a micro penis until halfway through the hookup and
01:56:53
Speaker
It's talent. I'm going to sit on it. Yeah. Halfway through the hookup. Let's ponder on this. How do you not realize the size? Was it that well or no that you've been doing time doing other things, building? Making out, you're kind of getting into it. Then you take his pants and go, oh, okay. Well,
01:57:19
Speaker
He was all about my needs and knew exactly how to touch me and where, Sarah says. I had numerous orgasms before he even took his pants off. There, why is halfway through the fucking, there it is. a Which is always a plus in my book, Sarah says. He was also super easy to please. Giving him a blow job was super simple. And by the time we got to the, you know,
01:57:46
Speaker
the uh the penile penetration this bitch is definitely ugly you're using words like that uh i was so sensitive that it was fabulous and it was easily one of the best sexual that explains a lot no wonder i was just thinking the same thing i get it now now i i've never had a complaint i've been a week down there before i take my page oh you haven't you haven't had a complaint because you're usually they're still passed out from the chloroform when you leave Well, if it was so good, then why did you write this letter, lady? Why did you put it out into the universe? I want to know if they got married. Do they got like you know babies with micro penises? Like what's going on here? Oh, I figured that me. Oh,
01:58:37
Speaker
ah we got a couple more here and then we'll get the block out of here. ah Kate B writes in this is already a winner. cause She says right out the bat. I'm bisexual. I'm winning my book. oh But I have a strong preference towards women. And to be honest, the best sex I've ever had with a man was from a man with a micropenis. Chalk another one up for the micropenises. We're winning tonight. you Not only did this mean he was no creator in bed. What's her name? so ka b We are.
01:59:14
Speaker
14 and 0 in this list as the micro penises go There's I don't think there's been a single complaint yet from both sexes because there was a couple gay stories in here so um But Kate says the best sex she'd ever had was with a man It was from a man with a micro penis not only did this mean he was more creative in bed than other men that she had slept with and And also much more open to including toys, aka hollow dildos or extenders. Well, yeah, extenders yes will be never use hot I thought arm extenders. I was like, is he really long arms? So he can hug her. So he can hug his big old woman. And hug these two girls. but Yes. anded um
02:00:06
Speaker
hollow dildos that stimulated him while adding a bit of lengthening girth to stimulate me are amazing she says but it was also a blessing to me i've had a bunch of surgeries on my jaw and usually can't give or oral sex to a man because my jaw can't open wide enough which disappoints us both for him i just think it's great So win, win. ah She can, give him she can, she can blow a small penis and she doesn't talk a lot. I don't get down to the story. I'm just saying, and she's like shit. So yeah, blow jobs in silence. Come out um go find out. The guy was the doctor who, who did the surgery. for his
02:00:53
Speaker
We need a body count on this girl. Jeff, I need you to get on it and track down Kate B. And so we can get a body count. Yeah, I mean, it's a win all the way around. You know, you can get blow jobs. She doesn't talk a lot and she likes girls. So you she can cook. She's the Marian kind. I'm just saying. And that's a lady you take home to mama. She liked my little penis. You guys never seen that movie Mac and me. Yes, that's what that remind of right. now
02:01:27
Speaker
sure they were original with little little holes for mouths. They like the straws. Yeah. They like they drink out of straws. Yeah. And they love Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. The Reese's Pieces.
02:01:38
Speaker
yeah
02:01:41
Speaker
Tiny holes. or Not the **** giant. Pinky lady. Her hole is massive. Carnivorous. umbaji bus And to to wrap up this b list about small penises.
02:02:00
Speaker
p I'm gonna ride this. This is the the person's name. I'm gonna ride this out. yeah See what you did there. and And the title of this story is and this huge dick. That's a huge dick. That's a huge dick.
02:02:19
Speaker
I'm going to ride this out right. so She says I s slept with a guy who had a micro penis. He was gorgeous. It's the second gorgeous guy with a small penis. Good thing I look like a Sasquatch. I'm just saying I'm gorgeous. I got a small thing to do together, ladies. I'm just saying. Maybe I've been lying this whole time and my shlong is and all been drunk in my pants because you're ugly because I'm ugly because I look like a Sasquatch.
02:02:46
Speaker
um and and And she says, and you know, the sex was pretty great. I think that due to his perceived inadequacy, he worked much harder, no pun intended, she says, to please me. Most guys just jackhammer you and roll over. But this guy took his time to understand my sexual taste, which in itself turned me on.
02:03:11
Speaker
I don't sound like we're still together. She sounds lazy. right She sounds pretty lazy. I was going to say, she sounds like a starfish. Never fuck a fish. I'm just saying. Dead fish. She
Podcast Structure and Conclusion
02:03:24
Speaker
said we saw each other a few times and I continued to have fun. Then one day his girlfriend came home and caught us in the act. He had told me he was single. more of Moral of the story.
02:03:38
Speaker
Dicks come in very various shapes and sizes, but in the end, a dicks a dick. No. Wow. Wow. That She dropped the dick.
02:03:58
Speaker
but Dick's a dick. Even the guys with a small dick will fucking and cheat on this. She said they just jackhammer, roll over, go to sleep. a wrong stop dating beta male jesus yeah those are the guys that are like yeah you loved a girl yeah weve been dignity like oh my god i'm done yeah i gotta go Don't move. I'll get you a towel. She's laying there. Oh, yes. This is the best I've ever put the foot. Amazing. Hey, look. Nonsense for nonsense is live.
02:04:35
Speaker
They're they're they're reading my story right now. Holy **** You need to look up the penis stories of the night ladies and gentlemen. Penis.
02:05:01
Speaker
that yes I'm sorry. Penis report. Where did you find that picture? Uh it's actually from a news story that I did uh like a couple of weeks ago and then it's an actual starfish. Is it an actual starfish? It's actually a starfish. like It's it's got a special name. They thought they were extinct and then found them again. That is a got a lazy. I'm sorry. You relate to the sausage party.
02:05:32
Speaker
yeah always This is lazy shaman shaman show. I don't know which one it is fake jedi lazy shaman. I don't know Yeah, I can tell I can never tell They all blend together after a while. So that one ladies and gentlemen is the end of our penis stories of the night Gentlemen, you gotta say before we sign out Chaka that was a lot of a lot of ah Interesting penis talk and I appreciate being here that not games doing it or podcast i'm just saying next week For more penises If you didn't get your penises tonight there will be more next Wednesday so tomorrow we don't have a show am I correct?
02:06:23
Speaker
Wow. in the arm ah We blaze might be doing something tomorrow. There's no. in the anymore cause i am busy Cash is not here this week, so there'll be no caches corner this week. We will be back next Thursday doing our picks for crown jewel.
02:06:46
Speaker
which is the next. And then so the next show that will be live at Blaze doesn't do anything tomorrow will be nonsense until Friday. We're going to be watching a top secret. A short stream. Yeah, yeah.
02:07:05
Speaker
So we're yeah, we're doing top secret with about Kilmer Friday and then Saturday, of course, we have the nonsense but nonsense six-hour Marathon show where if you want we'll drop the link in the chat and anybody can come up and talk about their micropenis Just keep it off. Yeah, I have not once mentioned my only fans tonight hmm However, I did get a new subscriber yesterday. You're welcome. You gave her me. I felt that. Your fucking video popped up with my FYB and I was like, no. I'll subscribe. Yeah, I got that. And by the way.
02:07:48
Speaker
There's not even anything there's yeah No, you put a video up on fucking tiktok on and it popped up I have it and it's all you're holding the belt and then it's quick flash i was like oh needs got do shirt Yeah, you know how I know you didn't see it cuz I didn't I didn't I didn't put a picture of me with the belt up there was it not that's I know i know ah i't know I passed out three years later i was like oh my god i love gri i naked over And i one I woke up in the fetal position crying There's nothing to see there. It was just two selfies. you're in don't believe community if you If you don't believe me, go to my TikTok. Click underscore talk and click that link in the bio. When I'll click the link, click the end of the Instagram. Click talk like that. yeah That's my I've never seen. I've never seen Topsy. I don't think I've ever even heard of this one. It's actually it's it's it's a it's kind of a parody movie of but
02:08:44
Speaker
That's that's that's great. It's kind of like a hot shot style movie where I never knew. I never knew Val Kimore did a comedy like that. Oh my God, it's hilarious. I haven't watched it in years. I'm halfway through it because I'm slowly watching it when I'm taking breaks from work, like when I eat. And I laugh. So I was laughing so hard when he fights the cop and then he's got his face on the cop's face. And then when he takes his face while the cop's face is all messed up. So the movie, Lazy Shaman, the movie's called Top Secret and it looks like it has Val Camore, Lucy Goodridge.
02:09:21
Speaker
It's it's like a that's the that movie they're talking about. Thank you. Yeah, we we're gonna watch it on Friday We do a commentary style track where we watch the movie and talk about what we're seeing and you know We just we watched all three terror buyers um And thank god halloween's over to jesus christ i'm so sick of fucking horror movies i' not They're just not my forte But those terror fire movies jesus i've never seen so much blood Have you gone through and watched any of the Hulu-ween movies, Jeff? What? There's some good ones. on hulu Hulu has a thing called Hulu-ween, and there's some really good movies. I don't watch horror movies. I i real something and i some good um rama love like that, but horror movies just don't do anything, bro. I'm just like, oh. I love horror movies. Ask a valid question.
02:10:20
Speaker
in the chat. If it's top secret, how will you find it? Top secret and hack secret is on Pluto TV and it is on Prime. You can rent it on Prime. No,
02:10:36
Speaker
I got it. I'm right over your fucking right over your fucking head. Anyways, if it would have been a micro penis, it would hit you in the mouth. but believe definite
02:10:55
Speaker
Anyways, Glick, what are you going to tell the people?
02:11:01
Speaker
um I'm tired of talking to the people, man. I'm sick of them. They're not subscribing to my OnlyFans. I don't want to talk to them. And you wonder why you don't make any money at it. Anyways, we'll see you guys. um make I make a little bit of money.
02:11:16
Speaker
Listen here, fuckers. Be good or be good at it. but If you have a micropenis, you better be good at something, because extra. We don't have a video set. I'm going to play it now. I'm going to play us out with the intro. Hit them with the two-fingered tongue action. That'll get them every time. Every once in a while, slide that pinky right in the back door. It's called a surprise entry. The white kiki, the kiki between the cheeky.
02:11:45
Speaker
You know, nonsense nonsensical network is kind of like a bu thumb in the ass. It's either uncomfortable and awkward or a pleasant surprise.
02:12:03
Speaker
nonsensical network fit for flavor every day movie talks new flicks hidden in display
02:12:14
Speaker
Grays football crashes touchdowns epic plays Spin it caption on the urban stories we embrace tune
02:12:45
Speaker
nature's arrangement cars with muscle
02:12:55
Speaker
nazis but the vots just right tune
02:13:07
Speaker
on repeat
02:13:20
Speaker
right bro
02:13:46
Speaker
All right. Rumble.