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Tucker Carlson | History Defeats Itself #110
464 Plays2 years ago
There was a time when #journalists were thought of as trustworthy thought leaders who enlightened us with #facts and #insights. They were people who cared about #humanity, had empathy, and wanted what was best for everyone. Then there is #TuckerCarlson, who so eloquently said that "women are primitive" and need to "do what they're told." And people say chivalry is dead.
In this episode, John leads a discussion about the "journalist" that was recently let go by Fox News, Tucker Carlson. Or, as he (probably) likes to be called, T-Bone.
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Transcript
Severe Hailstorm Hits Town
00:00:00
Speaker
We had the biggest hailstorm I have ever experienced last night. Park in a garage, but other people definitely had problems.
00:00:11
Speaker
Um, people like my coworker, her house, like they lost all their like outdoor lighting. It's all busted up. Their neighbors lost skylights. Like, I mean, it was bad, bad. People are going to have to have roofs replaced. I've never, I've never heard anything like that. It sounded like we were under attack. Dogs were going crazy. I checked on Elwood three times, passed the fuck out, not even didn't wake up. His, it was so loud in his room. Like I couldn't believe he wasn't waking up, but kids sleep, kids sleep pretty hard. Well, that kid drinks a lot. So.
00:00:39
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, he's got a hard name. He's cut back a bit. You know, he's cut back a bit. I mean, he was getting up every couple of hours to smoke. Yeah. So, you know, maybe he just fell asleep again. So what was that? Oh, God, what the hell was that? Hey, dad, dad, since you're in here, change the diaper. All the hell maybe shit my pants. I got really, I got really fucked up and I shit my pants.
00:01:07
Speaker
You know, like when you were in Kohl's. Dad.
Introduction to 'History Defeats Itself'
00:01:28
Speaker
Welcome to History Defeats Itself, a podcast that wonders why we never learn from our history. Thank you for joining us. Never ever learn. My name is Kevin Rosenquist, and as always, I am joined by two men who would never use campaign contributions to buy designer sweaters, John and Greg. How you guys doing?
00:01:49
Speaker
I'm returning my designer sweaters. Yeah. I'm feeling really awkward now because I don't want to be a liar, but also speak for us when you don't know. Yeah. I mean, first of all, the alarming thing I think for anyone is that you're accepting campaign contributions. Well, I got to get 2024 is going to be my year. You're like, you're like, I didn't specify what my campaign was. I just said it was a campaign. Yeah. Could be anything.
00:02:14
Speaker
How are you guys?
Surprise Birthday Party Success
00:02:16
Speaker
I'm doing really, really good, Kevin. How are you doing? Why are you really, really good? Because I threw a surprise birthday party for my lady friend and she, right now, I can do no wrong.
00:02:30
Speaker
Your fiance or someone else? Yes, my fiance. I feel like you can still do wrong, John. I mean, I've got to give yourself too much credit for that. I don't think you have to work that hard to do it. I got a lot of leverage the next few days because she was so happy and so surprised. Was there a reason that
Humorous Take on Surprise Parties
00:02:50
Speaker
you decided on a surprise party? Is it a special birthday? It's not a special birthday, which is the reason I did it.
00:02:55
Speaker
Yeah. Mm hmm. Right. And see it coming. No, she didn't see it coming. Yeah. So because I knew like the next the next one, the next whatever number followed by zero. Right. She'd be expecting it. She was not expecting it on this one. So, Greg, did you throw any surprise parties? I did throw a surprise party for my penis. And it took him. That was what, a minute? No, the surprise was that it lasted two minutes.
00:03:25
Speaker
God, that's just exhausting. Okay. So was your penis a prize is first question. And second question is if so, how did you know? You know what? I'm, I don't like this path anymore because I realized we've just, we're discussing the fact that I'm really excited on dicks. And apparently I am. You have a reputation. Yeah, I don't like it. It involves dicks. I'm going to try really hard, not talk about penis anymore. Good luck. One penis.
00:03:51
Speaker
No. PNI. The PNI code. Follow us on. Follow us on penis dot com. Follow us on social media on penis dot com. We're on Instagram. Looks like a penis. TikTok.
Social Media Presence and Humor
00:04:08
Speaker
YouTube. You know, we're places. We're places. Come follow us. We're check us out on OnlyFans where we will perform the squiggly H. I don't know what that is. I'm not going to be the I'm not going to be the.
00:04:21
Speaker
What is the squiggly H? OK, that's what happens. See, there's a guy on this side. See, and there's a guy on that side. Why is it squiggly? Well, he's moving. As soon as you as soon as you become a member, you're not going to just be prone. Have you had sex, Kevin? It's not a static event. Well, how how did two penises touching in court mean sex?
00:04:45
Speaker
It's not two penis. No, no, no. It's got to be three guys. It's going to be three. Oh, it's three guys. Oh, you didn't say that. Yeah, he did. Yeah. I said the middle. I thought the middle was the two penises. It could be that would be an age as well while we're waiting for John to get there because he's always John's always late. So while we're waiting for him to get there, we'll just be the two of us, Kevin. And we'll just touch tips, I guess. Yeah. We'll be like, oh, man, I forgot the guacamole.
00:05:14
Speaker
I'm not sure. Don't I don't know. I don't know where he's going. I like guacamole. Not sure. Not sure I do now. He's late. That's why he's like he came in, saw this quickly age without him. And he's like, you know what? I got to go get some guacamole. Yeah, apparently he's in the mood for avocados, onions, some citrus. Oh, God. Please don't. Salt, pepper.
00:05:39
Speaker
All right. All right. This week is Jon's
Tucker Carlson's Controversial Profile
00:05:44
Speaker
turn. So, Jon, enlighten us, please. All right. Well, you know, there's been a lot happening in the world lately. No. And so tonight I'm going to go back. Wait, in the world or on the world? I mean, yes.
00:05:58
Speaker
I mean, a lot happens in the world every day. I want to know if we're going to be talking about the mantle. I mean, I guess technically, right. I guess technically to be on the world. Right. Yeah. It's the things that humans do. So that's the topic. Yes, it's pretty broad.
00:06:15
Speaker
So go, this is going to be a 6,000 part series. Each, each episode will be nine hours long. Buckle up. Um, so on May 16th, 1969, one of the most devastating American events happened at the San Francisco children's hospital.
00:06:40
Speaker
Tucker Carlson was born. Oh, that's not great. So I guess what we're doing our topic on Tucker Carlson and does he defeat only himself or all of us is the question we'll be asking.
00:06:59
Speaker
I don't want to ruin your climax, but did you guys hear where he's going now? Twitter. Twitter. Well, Elon Musk didn't confirm that. He actually said that they haven't like hammered out a deal or anything. That was Tucker Carlson saying he was going to do some show. Well, he also said, what did he say? That Twitter was the last platform for that that has freedom of speech or something like that.
00:07:22
Speaker
That's what all these people say when they want to be able to say anything they want, when they want to say the most racist, sexist piece of shit things. There's there's there's people are confused about the difference between freedom of speech and assholeness. Well, but but aren't you allowed? I mean, but but that is freedom of speech. Oh, yeah. You're able to say whatever you want. But I guess the difference is, you know, the expectation you can say whatever you want, like this is old times history defeats itself.
00:07:52
Speaker
You can say whatever you want, but there are consequences to that. Those consequences could be loss of job, loss of income, loss of whatever. Getting cancelled. Getting cancelled, right. The idea that there's no consequences to freedom of speech. You can say any stupid thing you want to say. We could say whatever we want on this podcast. And if it goes out there, people may... Not that I don't mind the distraction, but I really need to know if Tucker was actually his birth name.
00:08:20
Speaker
It was. So I fucking hate his parents already. Who names their fucking kid Tucker? Sorry to all the talkers. You could name a dog Tucker. Tucker's a good dog name. Tucker is a good dog name. But a human piece of excrement? You don't name that Tucker. Well, here's the thing. If you were to put a dog in a bow tie, it would be cuter than Tucker Carlson in the bow tie.
00:08:42
Speaker
Well, of course. Right. I mean, you put a dog in any sort of time. It's adorable. Adorable. You could put dog shit in a bow tie and it's cuter than Tucker Carlson. I mean, it seems like you have a lot of strong feelings about Tucker Carlson. So. Oh, I can't wait. You proved me wrong in this fucking podcast episode. I'm going to prove you wrong because it turns out he's a really fucking good guy. He's not. That's not. And so is his dad, who is also a piece of shit. Um.
00:09:12
Speaker
He is the elder son of artists and San Francisco native Lisa McNeer and Dick Carlson, a former gonzo reporter. Do you guys know what gonzo reporter is? I do. I know what a gonzo reporter is. What's a gonzo reporter, Greg? The most famous one is What's His Face Together. Hunter S.
Exploring Freedom of Speech
00:09:33
Speaker
Thompson. Hunter S. Thompson, yeah. So yeah, gonzo reporters are apparently reporters that just do a shit ton of drugs and start fucking typing in front of their keyboards.
00:09:44
Speaker
It's sort of like a like a rogue kind of thing, right? Is it? Well, so it's a gonzo journalism involves reporting of personal experiences and emotions in contrast to traditional journalism, which favors a detached style and relies on facts or quotations that can be verified by third parties. So basically gonzo, you can just yeah, you basically you're it's an opinion piece like in the guise of
Gonzo Journalism and Trans Issues
00:10:09
Speaker
actual journalism. So Tucker followed suit from, uh, he did not fall. He, he fell right down straight from the tree. He didn't roll at all. Hit the ground stopped. Are you going to talk about lady in the Dale at all? Lady in the Dale. Okay. So, um, spoiler alert for anybody who wants to see the documentary on HBO called the lady in the Dale, uh,
00:10:30
Speaker
Fast forward, but I'm going to spoil the end. Is that OK? It's it's a documentary about this crazy car, this this three wheeled car that they were trying. Oh, I do know about this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And the woman who was behind it was, you know, she was was trained behind the car physically or she was the one who was running it was she was trans. She used to be a man.
00:10:55
Speaker
And there was a reporter that was just so like anti-trans and trying so hard to try to like out her. And, you know, he was pretty much a complete piece of shit to her. That was Mr. Dick Carlson.
00:11:10
Speaker
Oh, that makes sense. That makes sense. But yeah, he was very anti trans. He was also president. He was also president of the public broadcasting network. PBS are public broadcast. What is it? PBS Public Broadcasting? Was it Sam? Dick Carlson was. Yeah.
00:11:28
Speaker
What? Yeah, he sure was. I didn't put that in here, but that was like one of the things that he was present. He did a bunch of shit like he was like he was like he was the fucking ambassador to some small little country off the western coast of Africa. You promised me Tucker Carlson, not Dick Carlson.
00:11:48
Speaker
Well, you like dick. You talk about it all the time. Hey, yeah, I was I was actually just going to say, Greg, not supposed to be talking about dick anymore. So you needed to sit this one out. I mean, you said five minutes ago you were going to shut the fuck up about it. I didn't know I was being timed.
00:12:02
Speaker
I mean, I'm just kind of watching the thing. Maybe it was seven. There is a timer on our screens. There's a it's a tick timer. Well, yeah, in GarageBand, there's a tick timer. A lot of people don't know that, but there's actually a Greg tick timer device in GarageBand. It's an add on, though. It's you got a picture for that. So here's a little sad news, guys. It's like an hourglass. It's shaped like a dick. And you just brush it on its balls. See, he couldn't he couldn't do it, John. No, he could not do it.
00:12:32
Speaker
Anyway, the guy doesn't have a lot going on in his life. He's got his penis and hockey, and he can't play hockey 24 seven, but he can touch his penis most of the time. I'm not touching it right now. I mean, we can only see one hand. I can't see your left hand, bud. Hi, guys. He's got like a little rubber hand set up. Yeah, he's like he's like rubbing it against the bottom of his desk. I'm not touching it. Technically, this is making me really uncomfortable. So here's a really sad. So in 1976, poor Tucker's parents got divorced.
00:13:02
Speaker
Ah, shit. It sounds like his mom was a hippie. It sounds like his mom was a hippie. I will say this, right? I do feel bad for the guy, and like, when I started doing this, I mean, because I don't like him at all. And so when I started doing this, I was like, ooh, let's really jump on and hate Tucker. But he obviously, like, has abandoned issues and a lot of shit going on to be that angry. And so his parents got divorced, and basically his parents were married for nine years.
00:13:25
Speaker
But when he was about five, his mom just decided she's going to move to France and abandon them. So then the dad basically four years later, so after nine years of marriage, filed for divorce, got custody of the kids because the wife wasn't in the country. And then they moved from San Francisco down to San Diego. So, and apparently I don't know when he was trying to.
00:13:48
Speaker
out the guy. I don't know if that was San Diego. So this would explain why Tucker Carlson hates women. Yes. Yeah. Yes, it would. And it also explains why he's got a downstairs room with a Batmobile and a bunch of really cool inventions. You're saying that Tucker Carlson's Bruce Wayne? Well, it's his origin story. John just said his parents got killed in an alleyway in front of him. I mean, pretty much. You want to hear what you want to hear, don't you? That's what I heard.
00:14:19
Speaker
In 1979, a good old dick married Patricia Caroline Swanson, heiress, to Swanson Enterprises. Does that include Swanson's frozen dinners or whatever? I believe so. Same Swanson.
Swanson Family's Wealth
00:14:35
Speaker
But now you got my interest now. Always more of a Stouffer's guy myself. Well, before you get all Swanson, whatever.
00:14:45
Speaker
Swanson hard. So the Swanson family actually sold Swanson to Campbell's Soup Company in 1955. So although she was still part of the trust or whatever the whatever the fuck they had, however that money came down, they hadn't owned it for years, hadn't owned it for like 24 years. So did he divorce her when they did that? No. Are you trying to tell me there's no Swanson money?
00:15:10
Speaker
I mean, there's Swanson money, because they sold it, I don't know what they sold it for, but apparently in 1955 they sold it and it was enough money that she still had a fucked ton of money in 1979. Is it like frozen vegetables and shit? Yeah, they do everything. They're like food. Frozen dinners. They do all food. Yeah. They do like frozen stuff, canned stuff. If it's food, they're freezing it. Yep. They're preserving it. Dude, reach out to them. That's a great slogan. If it's food, we're freezing it.
00:15:43
Speaker
and technically humans are food, so we're gonna freeze them. Wow, that turned. Swanson, not cannibals that we know of. Well, I mean, we're food, you go out in the jungle and get attacked by a lion, they're not attacking you because they hate you. It's not a hate crime, it's an EU crime.
00:15:59
Speaker
In fact, I don't even think tigers consider it. Tiger court, like a whole legal system amongst the tigers. Like a tiger who's like three days from retirement. He's like, Oh God damn it. I've seen this before. We got a serial killer on our, on our hands.
00:16:24
Speaker
um okay are we gonna get to tucker i mean we're taught where he was born i gotta give you a little backstory about his asshole parent i don't give a fuck about never mind well because he's like i think it like we need to understand why did tucker become tucker this is just to do with tigers greg tigers can he just be an asshole
00:16:45
Speaker
Well, is any asshole just an asshole because they're an asshole the people you don't think there's free will like people can't choose to be assholes are nice I mean, I know a shit ton of people that had miserable terrible childhoods and they were abandoned. They weren't cocksuckers Just because there might be a reason for it doesn't
00:17:05
Speaker
mean that you've got like a complete you've got freedom to be the biggest. I'm not going to be an asshole. Yeah, I'm not giving you a carte blanche. I'm just guys, I'm just laying some groundwork here, right? It's pissing me off. Telling a story about a man we all have out of here. Oh, well, Kevin shut off his screen because one time his dad yelled at him about leaving the lights on.
00:17:32
Speaker
after he went to bed and all right. That's his origin story. I kind of got a pee. So I better get, I better get moving. Um, cause I can't walk away cause we filmed this. Now we used to pause. Well, it's a good thing that you didn't start with his grandparents. Oh, well, I mean, believe me, I know about his grandparents.
00:17:52
Speaker
His dad was actually given up to an orphanage and then he was fostered. And then when he was two years old, he got adopted. I know that Dick was adopted. So I'm generate trauma begets trauma begets a lot of really shitty people on
Nature vs. Nurture Debate
00:18:09
Speaker
cable news begets Fox News stardom and a very, very odd like I'm guessing like following like Bill O'Reilly. He's probably he probably didn't have a good childhood.
00:18:21
Speaker
Right? Like I'm guessing. Neither did strippers. I mean, it happens. Yeah. You're just generalizing strippers? Well, he's generalizing Fox News anchors. I just said two. I gave two examples.
00:18:37
Speaker
I didn't bring up Kelly on Conway or, and didn't she, didn't she like a pundit or something for Fox now? Anyway, I don't know. So Carlson, uh, Carlson wasn't that too much. It was briefly enrolled. Well, I'll call him Tucker. Tucker was briefly enrolled at me. What were you, what were you calling him before Tucker? I was, I was using his last name. T-bone TV dog.
00:19:02
Speaker
Um, check my dick between my fucking legs and walk through the room. Tucker. Tuck him. That's it. Tuck him. Um, he was briefly enrolled at the college de Lamont, a boarding school in Switzerland, but said he was kicked out. He attained his secondary education at St. George's school, a boarding school in Middleton, Rhode Island, where he started dating his future wife, Susan Andrews, the headmaster's daughter.
00:19:32
Speaker
scandalous. It's a very like his origins. Seems like a T-bone move. His origins are his origins like T-bone. Are we going with T-bone? I like I like Tuck on better. It's more more degrading. He would hate that more than T-bone, I think. Yeah, he would embrace T-bone. Yeah, he would. I don't think he's going to listen to this podcast episode. You don't know. I don't know. What if I hashtag it? I'll hashtag T-bone and then he'll be like, oh, my God.
00:20:00
Speaker
How did they know? Um, he then attended Trinity college in Hartford, Connecticut, graduating in 1991 with a BA in history. Carlson's Trinity yearbook describes him as a member of the Dan white society, which apparently is a reference to the American political assassin who murdered San Francisco mayor, George Mascone and supervisor Harvey milk. So he's basically in a club that named themselves after a guy who killed a homosexual.
00:20:29
Speaker
That makes sense. Sure does. So and after college, Tucker Tuckham T-Bone, he tried. He tried to join the CIA, but his application was denied. I'm assuming because of his face, his very punchable face because under race, he put fuck him. They were just like, if this guy, if this guy goes to a foreign land, he's going to get murdered. We can't have him. Yeah.
00:20:59
Speaker
I'm pretty sure he couldn't spell CIA, so he didn't... Probably. Well, he's actually really fucking smart. He's a really smart dude. He doesn't really show it. No, that's kind of... That's his move.
00:21:10
Speaker
After college, Tucker tried to—oh, I already said that, right? Oh, so he tried to join the CIA, and then he was denied, and then he decided to pursue a career in journalism, and his father Dick said, or his father Dick advised him and said the following thing about journalism, they will take anybody.
00:21:31
Speaker
So Tucker was like, cool. That is that is trait fatherly pep talk, right? That's a great fatherly pep talk. I mean, that is like the how to instill confidence in your child. Hey, man, we'll take anybody. So you got to get shot at this. See, I think I know you know you're a piece of shit, but even you can't piece of shit. Yeah.
Tucker Carlson's Journalism Beginnings
00:21:52
Speaker
Yeah. This is you got this. You got this. Um, lose my number. Don't call me again.
00:21:59
Speaker
You're going to be on social media someday. I've got an out of trans woman. I got a full day.
00:22:08
Speaker
Um Tucker began his career in journalism as a fact checker for policy review and ironic I'm sure he was really ethical Sure, you didn't he just didn't he was like this. I don't I don't understand. What are facts? I don't get it I I think I mean kind of according to my research He actually kind of was and then we're gonna get we're gonna kind of get to the point where he turns and I'm not saying he was like the best guy in the world He really he just I think he's kind of like a douchey
00:22:35
Speaker
frat boy Brett Kavanaugh Brett Kavanaugh kind of douche and then he reached a point and I think that like I think that was kind of the moment where he was like oh okay I'm gonna go do this now I'm gonna become this character yeah and and make a bunch of money yeah that's what I was gonna say Kevin I was even gonna use a word character ah look at us
00:22:55
Speaker
All right, I'm leaving. We should hang out. So OK, so yeah, and then he did. So he worked at some shit. He worked. He worked. He did like a lot of stuff in print where he worked for New York magazine, Reader's Digest, Esquire, Slate, The Weekly Standard, The New Republic, The New York Times magazine, The Daily Beast, The Wall Street Journal.
00:23:16
Speaker
Um, and John F Harris of Politico would later remark on how Carlson was viewed as an important voice of the intelligentsia during this period. So it was actually very like, he was very well known and within the like news media and was, was kind of looked at with like high regard and esteem. Huh. I know. I know. Right.
00:23:44
Speaker
Huh? Indeed. Kind of reminds me of how they say like, uh, eggs aren't good for you. Eggs are good for you. Eggs aren't good for you. Eggs are good for you. That's kind of like Tucker, Tucker Carlson. I don't think anybody's thinking Tucker Carlson is good for you, but like, you know, he's not yogurt. I don't know.
00:24:10
Speaker
He could be rich He's a bag of something he could be yogurt He could be yogurt. He could be rich culture to have you can say you can have a lot of cultures Oh John that was a good one. Yeah, I beat you to it Kevin. That's right So wait wait a like come in second and make yourself look like an idiot Way to way to Tucker yourself buddy
00:24:38
Speaker
Wait, let me see if I can do the Tucker face. Well, you got to get like a fatter face. He's got a fatter and then laugh like a hyena. Have you ever seen that clip like the Daily Show put together of just him and Elon Musk laughing back and forth? It's creepy as hell. Yeah, they both have super creepy laughs. He's yeah, he's definitely like.
00:25:04
Speaker
I would not classify him as a good human being. I actually don't even know who you're talking about. Tucker Carlson or Elon Musk. Tucker. Or The Daily Show. I have no idea who he is.
00:25:17
Speaker
Because The Daily Show is very foreshadowing of which to come, Kevin. I don't get it. So in his early television career, Tucker wore bow ties, a habit from boarding school that he continued on air until 2006. Not that that's important, I just want to remind everybody that he wore bow ties.
00:25:38
Speaker
In 2001, Tucker was appointed co-host of Crossfire, in which Carlson and Robert Novak represented the political right, altering on different nights, while James Carville and Nepal Bagala also alternating as host represented the left. You guys remember James Carville? Oh yeah. The raging Cajun, right? Yep. Yep. He's a, he was, wasn't he the guy who like basically got Bill Clinton elected?
00:26:02
Speaker
Yeah, he was his strategist or I don't know some sort of political something. Yeah. His bookie. His bookie. He got him prostitutes. Yeah. Yeah. What is the strategy on how to get your hookers without getting caught? Character assassination right there. I'm sorry. I just I just tell it like it is. You're talking about a Billy Tucker. Tucker told me about that. He did. I mean, you know.
00:26:26
Speaker
In hindsight, like if Bill Clinton were president today, you know, he's not as bad as Donald Trump, but he definitely does a fucked up thing with women. Oh, yeah, he was. Yeah, he was a scumbag. No doubt about it.
00:26:37
Speaker
And both those motherfuckers were on that island. So Gilligan. Yep. Donald Trump was a skipper and Bookin Clinton was what's the guy's name? Gilligan Gilligan. Yeah, not Gilligan. Epstein. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm sure they both have done horrible things on that island or wherever they went.
00:26:56
Speaker
In October 2004, comedian and The Daily Show host John Stewart appeared on Crossfire, while being interviewed, Stewart launched into a critique of Crossfire, saying the show was harmful to political discourse in the US. Have you seen that clip? Yeah, that's a really good clip. It's fantastic. Yeah, it is really good. He's like, just stop.
00:27:18
Speaker
Yeah, stop doing this. Yeah, it's terrible for America. Well, apparently Tucker didn't listen. Oh, but he did. So this is the harmful political discourse in the US. Carlson was signaled out by Stewart for criticism, but Tucker, in turn, criticized Stewart for being biased towards the left. The Atlantic suggested that Stewart's appearance was a turning point, leading to how Carlson rebranded himself.
00:27:45
Speaker
So basically it was kind of like at that moment. But I will say like one of the things after that they went off the air. We love Jon Stewart here on History Defeats Itself. We do love Jon Stewart. I just wanted to point that out. Mr. Jon, Mr. Stewart, Jon, Mr. Jon Stewart, if you want to be a guest here, we'll be more than happy to have you. We're going to be completely incapable of interviewing you though.
00:28:10
Speaker
Just understand that we talk over our guests a lot, so you're going to have to get used to that and bring your dick jokes, buddy. Yeah. Oh, Greg's got to approve that. We stopped doing that. I did. We I don't think we did. I really don't think we did. We stopped doing that. But after after the what was kind of fascinating is after after they after that show aired, the Jon Stewart and because he was he was there promoting a book
Jon Stewart vs. 'Crossfire'
00:28:38
Speaker
They wrote a book on The Daily Show, something about America, America, the untold story, something. And so he was actually there promoting that book, and then he got in that conversation, and the guy who like helped write that book, and John Stewart, Tucker Carlson, and who was the guy? Pete, or Paul Pagola. They all like- Had to dance off. Yeah, like they stayed for like an hour and a half after the show went off, and they continued the conversation.
00:29:04
Speaker
So it wasn't as like, uh, you know, it wasn't like this gotcha kind of thing. And then, you know, say it was, you know, it was just, they had a conversation, a political conversation about it. And Carlson even later even said, he was like, yeah, it's like, it's just something the guy had to get off his chest and was very heartfelt. So he actually didn't have any resentment towards him. So about it, I think later he got resentment about his boat. Well, he knew he was right. It's like, we really should stop doing this shit.
00:29:30
Speaker
on January 5, 2005, CNN chief Jonathan Klein told Carlson the network had decided not to renew his contract and CNN announced that it was ending its relationship with Carlson and would soon cancel Crossfire.
00:29:48
Speaker
And this I love Tucker later said, quote, I resigned from crossfire in April, 2004, many months before Jon Stewart came on our show because I didn't like the partnership. And I thought in some ways it was kind of pointless, kind of pointless conversation. So basically the guy gets fired and then he's like, you didn't fire me. I quit.
00:30:08
Speaker
Yeah. So I quit before it even happened. Like you said, I got fired for months ago. I mean, we didn't announce anything and there was no proof of this, but I quit motherfucker. And I still collected a paycheck. And, you know, but no, I I'm out, man. I've been in that wire and me. That was a squirrel in a bow tie. I love Jon Stewart.
00:30:31
Speaker
And then I fired my AR 15 converted fully automatic into a fucking can of beer. Oh shit, guys. I got a problem. I got to take a time out. I apologize to all the people. I don't sweat it. Kevin and I will take over from here. I just spilled beer everywhere. Just talk about how much you hate Tucker Carlson. All right. Can you do a good John voice? Not really. I hate his voice. So I try to avoid it at all costs.
00:31:04
Speaker
Okay. I'm going to try that anyway. Okay. I just spilled beer everywhere. Nope. That's it. That's not right. I'm an idiot. I don't know how to put beer down on flat surfaces. It's funny when I, when I, when I tried to do a John voice in those, the videos that I do, I kind of like, it's like Spicoli. Yeah. I don't know why he doesn't sound like Spicoli, but that's how I do my John voice. You do your John voice as Spicoli.
00:31:32
Speaker
Well, like when I do my videos, which I haven't done in a long time, but when I've done my videos, impersonating you guys, like I kind of do, like I'd start with a little bit of a Spicoli type, you know, surfer stoner guy thing with you. And what about me? I just, I just, I just do a higher voice. Not great. My voice isn't higher than his, is it? Yeah. Maybe it is. I don't know. Is it? You know how you can never hear your own voice properly? It's like nasally, you know? So I try to do like a nasally voice with you. Greg's voice is nasally. Yeah.
00:32:04
Speaker
hmm I I'm not okay with you attacking Greg like this I know you neither you guys are happy with my voice but you've heard him before you just didn't notice why didn't you move on for God's sake I didn't know you're creative I'm bored the fans gotta be super bored notice I said fans yeah I haven't been excited since this episode started
00:32:25
Speaker
or Tucker Carlson or this is just completely flaccid right now or John's beard or my flaccidity my beard's amazing it's a beard I I get stopped all the time now and people are like sir may I touch your beard may I smell your beard and then they grab it and try and trim it no and then they give you a dollar because they think you need to get food
00:32:51
Speaker
Yeah, but that happens 9,000 times a day, so I'm just bringing in more money. And then John goes and eats soup and drops the soup all over his beard. And rice, soup and rice. And gets a bunch of liquor, because that's what you do when you have a beard like that. And I drive my boat into stuff. John puts the hoe in hobo.
00:33:13
Speaker
bringing sexy back. Um, so after his firing or quote unquote, I quit, um, Carlson was hired to hail my new program for PBS in November, 2003. Tucker Carlson unfiltered. No, that's what the world needs. That's my, that's my least favorite kind of sake.
00:33:34
Speaker
I was thinking Saki. I even have a little note about Saki. God damn it. I'm going to say it again. And don't you dare take my fucking jokes. I'm not editing it. So it's all going to happen. Well, I'm not going to. I can't. I can't do it. It ran concurrently with Carson's Crossfire gig on CNN, and the show launched on June 18th, 2004, and was, according to The New Yorker, part of a broader effort to push PBS further to the right ideologically.
00:34:02
Speaker
Carson announced he was leaving this show roughly a year after it started on June 12th, 2005, despite the Corporation for Public Broadcasting allocating money for another show season. Carlson wanted to focus on his new MSNBC show, Tucker. What was that? What was that show with, uh, Oh fuck. It was, uh, who was captain Kirk?
00:34:25
Speaker
William Shatner. Yeah, like William Shatner had a show like in the T.J. Hooker. T.J. Hooker. I don't know why, but like I forgot that was Shatner. Tucker sounds like a cop show. It does sound like a cop show. I agree. Really bad 80s. Yeah. Cop show that cop show that the reruns play when you're homesick from school. Yeah. Like instead of smoking or like second on the lollipop, he eats like french dip sandwiches.
Tucker Carlson's PBS Era
00:34:52
Speaker
What we got to.
00:34:56
Speaker
We got a crime. I've seen this before. We're going to see you. It's delicious. And in all of the moments he realizes like he solves a case, it always connects to a Jew, something about a Jew that reminds him of a clue. He'll like see, he'll like look into the issue and it'll like look, it'll like look like somebody and he'll be like,
00:35:24
Speaker
The butler did it. Took her Sunday nights after. Matt Barney Miller. Only on CBS. And he said that Aldo, although PBS was one of the, quote, least bad, end quote, instances of government spending, he disagreed with it. It was still a problematic leftist government organization. Well, there's that. I mean,
00:35:52
Speaker
I mean, Ken Burns is definitely very leftist. Yeah, but like the news segments, I feel like are pretty. I love it. I think it's pretty fair. I mean, they definitely they definitely will attack people when they deserve it, but not attack, but, you know, call people out on their shit. But I feel like it's pretty fair. I think so, too. I think they just I think I think PBS just their news, they just present the news.
00:36:15
Speaker
Yeah. They'd really just, they, for the most part, they do. There's some people on the, on the, on the show that get a little bit like Steven scape can get a little passionate at times, but overall, no idea what you guys are talking about. That's yeah. Hang on. All right. Move on. What about a, what about a Tucker Carlson Ford?
00:36:35
Speaker
Would that be a good name for a Ford dealership? So, no. Alright. Come on down to Tucker Carlson. No, it doesn't roll off the tongue, does it? Just Tucker's. Come on down to Tucker's Ford. Come on down to Tucker Ford. Yeah, no, that actually works. Tucker Ford works. Karaoke burn and hand job hut. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Do not besmirch the hand job hut.
00:36:56
Speaker
by putting it into a Tucker Carlson sponsored used car dealership. I don't know. I think we kind of needed a celeb to kind of start it up again, even though we don't like him necessarily. He is a name. He definitely would get a lot of attention to the to the business now. I bet you he's good at hand jobs.
00:37:12
Speaker
So you're saying not only is he a spokesperson, but he's actually, he works there too? I would hope. No, no, no, no. He's not only a spokesperson, he's also a client. A client, yeah. That I would believe. That would probably, he wouldn't even ask for money. He'd just want a lifetime supply of free hand jobs from the hand job. That's true. Well, he doesn't want that. He'd be our only customer. We'd go out, we'd go out of business so fast. Really fast. Tucker, you've been here four times today.
00:37:40
Speaker
I'm getting one of those. Should we get one of those like cards like a membership and like after twelve hand jobs like a punch card? Yeah, we get a punch card and we punch it with like a penis press. Why not a hand? Why does it always have to be a penis with you? Always should be a hand. I don't know if you know this or not, John, but penises are very involved in hand jobs. It should totally be a hand though. John's right. It's got to be a hand.
00:38:03
Speaker
Yeah. Okay. Maybe like a cup fist. Like it could be like a little picture of a penis and then you punch it with a hand. Yeah. Yeah. Hand shaped punch. This is why Kevin's in charge of marketing.
00:38:19
Speaker
He is good. He's good. Carson's early evening show, Tucker, originally titled The Situation with Tucker Carlson premiered on June 13th, 2005.
Success of 'Tucker Carlson Tonight'
00:38:29
Speaker
It's not the guy from Jersey, sir. What is it? What now? The Situation.
00:38:34
Speaker
Oh, the guy from Jersey Shore, right? He had guest. He had his featured guest on Rotating Panel were Rachel Maddow and Jay Severin. Oh, Rachel Rachel Maddow and and John's and Tucker Carlson on the same show. That's right. That's interesting. Sadly, guys. Tucker was canceled March 10th, 2000. Just like T.J. Hooker.
00:39:02
Speaker
I just sent my TiVo. I just got a time machine and I went back and I said my fucking TiVo. I really want to see this as you. Yeah, I don't know how this is going to end.
00:39:40
Speaker
In discussing the termination, he describes himself as, quote, having a lot of problems with authority and being told what to do. I don't react well to it. You know, like a job. I become really aggressive with my bow ties. You're never going to believe this, but I got a job at McDonald's and they kept telling me what to do, man.
00:39:46
Speaker
I hate those azure cliffhangers.
00:40:02
Speaker
They're like, I'll make the fries when I fucking want to make the fries, man. We're a fast food restaurant. We need to be fast with the fries. Those are your rules. I'm trying to kick out all these minorities, though. They're just hanging around eating food. I mean, that's not right. You know, they're not here legally. I'm changing all the signage on the restrooms. Make sure they're not trans or gendered. What are you called? Ginger neutral. Yeah, they can't be gender neutral, man.
00:40:31
Speaker
Do you guys want to know? No, no. And then he salted the french fries with a penis-shaped salt shaker. Okay, here we go. What? See, he cannot... He can't resist. I'm doing it now because he can't even think. That's not even a good joke! A penis-shaped salt shaker? Listen, he's just looking at things on his desk and saying what they are. I don't have a salt shaker on my desk. If you did though, it would be penis-shaped.
00:40:55
Speaker
I'm watching the score of the Maple Leaf Panthers game. What? 2006 reality TV show did Tucker Carlson. Participate on the apprentice, the apprentice. I mean, that would make total sense because he does second that guy's dick, but no, my God, he would just he would give I'm going to give you a hand. OK, it's definitely not survivor. It rhymes with the real world. Prancing with the Mars.
00:41:24
Speaker
Are you kidding me? I'm not. Oh my God. He was not naked and afraid.
00:41:31
Speaker
That's disturbing night. He was on Nick at night. God damn, he was on that. Oh, that's not for washed up celebrities. I mean, he was on. I mean, he was never really a celebrity. He was good enough. I think he was a good dancer for Christ's sake. He did take dance lessons. How did he do in the show? I don't know. I didn't. Damn it, John. I looked into detail. That's what this is all about. You can't just say that and not know. All right. Well, Greg, are the other Panthers winning?
00:41:59
Speaker
Oh, apparently congratulations is in order Kevin Because the Blackhawks got some guy who's like a big fucking Dale and it's probably gonna give you a winning season
00:42:10
Speaker
That, you know what, that's actually a much better synopsis than I think John, than I would have thought John could have come up with. So John and I had a long conversation and I prepped him with a bunch of knowledge and that wasn't bad. That was, that was pretty good. Yeah. Yeah. I wanted to know why I hated you so much. Yeah. I get that. I get that. What's the guy's name? Connor Bedard. That's it. He's 18, 19. Something like that. Jesus. He's young. He's very, very good.
00:42:36
Speaker
Is it too late for me to have a career in hockey? Nope. Yes. Not at all. Definitely. Yeah. 100 percent. Yes. I'm not good with this. We have a job for you. It's called Brett Burns. Yeah, he's got he's definitely got the playoff beard going. That's I can't be a goon. Now, who are you going to fight? You can't. Oh, it doesn't again clean the bathroom. I'm so confused.
00:43:00
Speaker
Which I don't understand sports. Why am I cleaning the bathroom with skates? It doesn't make any sense.
00:43:10
Speaker
Carson had, oh yeah, he also had a cameo appearances as himself in season one episode or the first season. Hardball of 30 Rock and in season nine. He was in the first season of 30 Rock. There was like a fake show called Hardball. He was like a correspondent on that show. That would imply it a sense of humor.
00:43:33
Speaker
Yeah, that's surprising to me. Uh, he was on Season 9 episode- Fucking Tracy Morgan is in 30 Rock. One of the funniest people on the planet. Tina Fey. Yeah. Are you just gonna listen to- Black people, women, how would he do this?
00:43:47
Speaker
I mean, I don't know. I could call Tina Baldwin. Tina, Tina Fey, if you're listening, we'd love to have you and you and John on at the same time. In fact, we'll get rid of Kevin and Greg. Thank God. And we're going to change in either of you guys edit podcasts. It's going to be called the John Banks podcast edited by John Stewart. Oh, yeah, that's really using him to the best of his abilities. I bet he's good at it. Don't don't sell John Stewart short.
00:44:18
Speaker
That means move on. Just go. Why can't you guys keep it shut up? What happens when you pause for like 30 seconds? He was also on, uh, he had a camo appearance in the 2008 film swing vote again, playing himself. So apparently if people are like, Oh, we need an asshole character, let's call Tucker.
00:44:43
Speaker
On January 11th, 2010, Tucker Carlson and Neil Patel, a former aide to Dick Cheney and former college roommates of Tucker, launched a political news website titled The Daily Caller. Carlson served as editor-in-chief and occasionally wrote opinion pieces with Patel. But in June, 2020, Carlson sold his one-third steak in The Daily Caller's Patel for an undescribed amount and said, Neil runs it and I won't, I wasn't adding anything, so we made it official.
00:45:14
Speaker
It was an undescribed amount. Undisclosed. Oh. Which could also be undescribed. Nobody described what the amount was. It was a check.
00:45:26
Speaker
Had a rioting number. And I'm guessing for a lot of fucking money. So. You know, oh, God, did you know that like for him to do that to he basically told Fox News because he was still under contract with Fox News after they fired him. And so they have to pay him out and it's something like 35 million or it's crazy fucking number. And he's given that up so he can go do his own thing. Yeah, because there's a. What do they call him? Non compete. Yeah, yeah, thank you. Yeah.
00:45:58
Speaker
I was like, can't do that stuff. Can't do it. What is that? No, no takey backsies. No, no go elsewhere when still here kind of sort of. Here's the thing. I will gladly take the remaining or his remaining contract and just take the money. I won't go on air, but I'll take 35 million from Fox. So why would you ever do anything again? I know. That's the point.
00:46:27
Speaker
There's not much reason to get on Twitter and start doing the same bullshit over again. Yeah. Well, I think the reason unless you really want to be an asshole. I mean, he thinks he's he's too big of a he's too much of a pompous asshole. You know, he thinks that he he's got an elevated sense of worth. Right. Right. He thinks his opinion actually matters. Didn't kind of like guys that do podcasts. Wasn't that like. Oh.
00:46:51
Speaker
Who's the? What was the? So you had Glenn Beck. He's gone now. They fired him and he disappeared. Bill O'Reilly. He's gone. He's disappeared. You know, so they don't last long after they leave. So I'm really hoping that this is the death of Tucker and not not the actual literal death. You shouldn't say that, John. It's bad color for your beard. I mean, I don't think my beard has car. I mean, it wasn't going to get more gray. I guess it could. I could lose this black streak.
00:47:17
Speaker
Could become self-aware. It's already self-aware and I know please please help me So in May He wants to be here Courtney, you know, it's funny Courtney didn't like it didn't like it and then the other I was gonna actually shave it off for her birthday and So I was like, alright, I'm gonna shave it off your birthday. She goes no, no, don't do that You gotta start really getting her better gifts
00:47:48
Speaker
Listen, asshole. That was. I mean, are you sure she didn't want to watch? That was one of seven gifts. One of seven gifts, Greg. That was one. Still waiting for her engagement ring. So two was. No, she has an engagement ring. She broke it. I'm just kidding. Two was the part. She says she bought it. She broke it. She broke it. Oh, God, that's a terrible fucking metaphor for your relationship to add to the ring. Who cares? Maybe it's because it was an onion ring. It wasn't an onion ring. It was a plastic ring I found inside a McDonald's.
00:48:17
Speaker
And at one time it had a candy jewel on it, but someone already had eaten it, so John didn't have to give it to her. Well, they ate half of it. It was Princess Cut. So go on, you're going to get her, you're going to shave off your beard for her birthday, but she said no candy. She doesn't want me to shave it off. I got to talk to her. I mean, she doesn't want to talk to you. She asked me to please, she said, please have him stop contacting me.
00:48:46
Speaker
The texts are inappropriate and two o'clock in the morning, the things he says to me, please, please have him stop. Yeah. She started getting texts at two in the morning that says, can you touch John's beard for me? Tell me what it feels like. Smell it. Can you put a flower or can you put a, can you put a flower? Can you put a pillow over his fucking face? Oh geez. That got dark. I did get dark. Speaking of get things getting dark. Let's continue talking about Tucker Carlson.
00:49:14
Speaker
So in May 2009, that motherfucker joined Fox News. He was being hired as a news contributor. He was a frequent guest panelist on Fox's late-night satire show, which I don't even know Fox had a satire show, Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld, made frequent appearances on the all-star panels. I should know that guy. He's another Greg.
00:49:39
Speaker
You guys have meetings? Do you have Greg meetings? Yeah, we do. Can't talk about it. Are they monthly or annual? Or anal? Can't talk about it. Can't not talk about it. Fine. He made frequent appearances on the All Star panel segment of Special Report with Brett Baer. I'm pretty sure it was not an All Star panel. There's no way. Well, that didn't say who they were stars of or what they were stars of.
00:50:05
Speaker
What was that? I don't think anyone that's a host on Fox News has a mother that loves them. Oh, I would agree with that 100%. Yeah. Yeah. There's definitely not a lot of hugs going on when they were kids. Yeah. Like if they see a guy wearing a shirt that says free hugs, they beat the fuck out of them. And then they put a bow tie on his. Yeah. Or they just kill him with a bow. They strangle them with a bow tie. Um,
00:50:32
Speaker
He was a substitute host of Hannity and Sean Hannity's absence and produced another fucking asshole. That's one that we forgot earlier. I mean, guys, here's the thing. Any name I say off of Fox News, let's just assume they're assholes. We don't have to keep stating the obvious. Kevin's got bangs. Greg has a really bad haircut. We know we don't need to keep saying it.
00:50:52
Speaker
I do a haircut. Do they still do the worst, the most bizarrely dumb morning show named Fox and Friends? Do they still do that? I think they do. Like what the fuck? Like it's like like my two and a half year old son would come up with a name like that. Yeah. Let's go to Fox and Friends. And then be their pants and take a nap. And then I'd have to change their diaper. Is that an impression of your son's voice?
00:51:18
Speaker
No, it's actually more talking about them, but OK, because it's not a flattering voice. That's how he talks. I mean, I could talk like myself, but you wouldn't understand a word he says. It's more like it's, you know, you got to you got to speak the language. Only only parents can speak the language. Now he's bragging. I know his look is he's like he's like only I with my superior and teller. I can understand my child. He's like the Highlander.
00:51:48
Speaker
He also produced and hosted a special entitled fighting for our children's minds in September 2010. I don't know who they were fighting or what they were going to say. What were they? What was the show about? Apparently children's minds. Are you that fucking making sure they don't turn out gay? It's probably what we're doing a complete fucking timeline of this fucking asshole. I got into the point. We're getting there.
00:52:12
Speaker
I mean, I'm just killing time. Like it's it's basically I'm leaning up to get fired in 2008. He was an asshole in 2009. He was an asshole. So two thousand advertising for a man. All of our listeners are going to now start subscribing to his fucking. His only fans. And we're going to make him money.
00:52:38
Speaker
We have that kind of power Yeah, we're bringing Tucker back. That's I was so disappointed when he left cuz I really love hating him so much And now I can't ever watch his show. I've never watched Fox News Then how do you know if you hate him? I've Seen him in interviews seen enough because those might just be the outtakes where he's like man
00:53:00
Speaker
Wouldn't it be funny if I actually thought that was true? He's like, I'm glad people read the whole story and they're not going to hate me for the soundbite. You know, it's funny as last the last presidential election. That was funny. It was Sheena and I had, you know, we were watching kind of float around a little bit when you're watching the coverage and we watched a lot of PBS, but we did put on Fox News on occasion. It was actually.
00:53:26
Speaker
Well, it was boring. It was boring. Yeah. But it was actually like not far right. It was there was pretty just normal just talking about it. Like when they cover matter of fact about it. Yeah. When they cover elections, they're pretty it's really it's they just said you don't watch Fox News. How do you know that? I have watched Fox News. Liar. I know. I know. Which which which one is the real joke? I'm watching it right now.
00:53:55
Speaker
There's a little I see nothing on your TV. It's just totally black news of my corner. Little Fox. Yeah. Watch Fox News on his watch. Yeah. No, I like like a what's that guy's Pierce Morgan or something like that? And he on Fox. He's a piece of shit, too. Wasn't he on CNN? I thought he was on CNN. Why do you think he's a piece of shit? Because I've heard I've actually seen his interviews and I've heard what he has said.
00:54:24
Speaker
to people on social media and he's kind of an asshole. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. What do you think of Joe Rogan? We don't need to talk about him right now. I mean, we really do because we need we need to bump up our numbers. We want to get some of the Joe Rogan viewers. Listen, I don't think Joe Rogan listeners are going to like us. Probably not. Probably not. They're going to like they're going to like protein shakes and weights.
00:54:52
Speaker
So in 2013, Carlson replaced Dave Briggs as a host of Fox and Friends Weekend. Oh, good God. Joining Alison, whoever the fuck she is, and some other guy named Clayton on Saturday and Sundays. But then on November 14th, 2016, Carlson began hosting Tucker Carlson tonight.
00:55:15
Speaker
on fox news the premiere episode of the show which replaced on the record was the network's most watched telecast of the year and the time slot with 3.7 million viewers that's what did he talk about what did he talk about in that episode he talked about your bangs huh i know he probably could have gotten 3.8 if he would have talked about greg's penis obsession
00:55:41
Speaker
But he knows it's copper. If he would've talked about my beard, he would've gotten 10 million. But he didn't. Boy, he really doesn't know how to play the game. Doesn't know how to get the numbers. So on March 17th, Tucker Carlson tonight was the most watched cable program in the 9 p.m. slots. And then he got moved to the 8 p.m. slot after Bill O'Reilly got
00:56:09
Speaker
Shit can't fired for being a prick. What did he get fired for? I mean, he was always a prick, but I can't remember what he got fired for. I don't know. I should have studied Bill O'Reilly before we started this episode. Like what dipshit fuckhead moved you have to do to get fired from Fox? Right. You have to bash Trump in in texts and that's not why they fired voting voting companies on on. Yeah.
00:56:35
Speaker
on your show until our voting voting you know dominion on your show until you get to just entertainers it's all entertainment and it's you know they they didn't pick a character like you were saying earlier and they go with it as if they give a fuck they just want to cash paychecks yeah obviously he doesn't believe he didn't believe a damn thing he said so it'll be interesting to see it will be interesting to see if
00:56:58
Speaker
I don't know, though, but he he can't stand Trump and he was just touting Trumpism. Yeah, I mean, he was a completely different person on air than he was off air. So it'll be interesting to see what he does when he goes to Twitter. You know, I mean, is he going to be is he going to be still, you know, stroking Trump's dick or is he going to is he actually going to be? Well, I can't say honest, but is he going to be, I don't know, closer to being honest, I guess.
00:57:22
Speaker
I don't know. I don't know. I mean, but he's always, I mean, if you go back, you know, he's always been very far right. I can't wait to not find out. Yeah. I can't wait to find out through clips on The Daily Show. Yeah. I can't wait. I can't wait for that. Those are
Controversial Quotes and Lawsuits
00:57:38
Speaker
entertaining.
00:57:38
Speaker
By the end of 2018, the show had begun to be boycotted by at least 20 advertisers after Carlson said, immigration makes the country, quote, poor, dirtier and more divided. According to Fox News, the advertisers only move their ad buys to other programs. By January 2019, his show dropped a third with 2.8 million nightly viewers down 6% from the previous year.
00:58:01
Speaker
The show had lost 26 advertisers and there were calls to fire Carlson from Fox News in March, 2019 after media matters resurfaced remarks that he made over several years to the radio show, Bubba the Love Sponge. Never heard of that. Concerning women, calling them like dogs and extremely primitive. So, and he also had some very lovely things to say about statutory rape, Iraqis and immigrants. And your mom.
00:58:28
Speaker
I don't think he knows my mom. I'm sure he was your mom, just your mom. Just your mom. That's how he that's how he ends every night. Yeah. So thanks for watching your mom, your mom, your mom. So Dan Rather used to say courage and Dan Rather. So he says your mom.
00:58:48
Speaker
Dan Rather. At the close of 2019, Tucker, his Nielsen ratings among all viewers, 25 to 54, placed him second only to Fox's Sean Hannity. So he was by Sean Hannity for a lot of years. In December 2019, Playboy model Karen McDougall sued Fox News after Carlson in a 2018 episode of his show accused her of extorting Donald Trump. In September 2020, federal judge Mary Kay
00:59:16
Speaker
some weird less name dismissed the lawsuit citing Fox news defense that Carlson's extortion claims were opinion-based and not statements of fact. The judge also agreed with Fox news defense that reasonable viewers, which I don't know how this would have skepticism over statements Carlson makes on his show as he often engages in exaggeration and non literal commentary.
00:59:43
Speaker
quote, skating actual facts on his show. So like how a judge... Do you know about that? Like, do you know the lawsuit that... Remember when Al Franken actually sued Fox News? Like years ago and he lost... I don't remember that. Yeah, so he sued them for defamation and because basically the way they got around it,
01:00:05
Speaker
Well, so if I were to say, Greg's a piece of shit, right, that's me saying Greg's a piece of shit. But what Fox News would do is they would say some people say Greg's a piece of shit. Right. So they wouldn't give a source, but they would say, I'm not saying it. Some other people. So like how Donald Trump talks. Yeah. Yeah.
01:00:26
Speaker
So it's like this whole thing of like, it's like they're, they're saying it, but they're not saying it and they're not taking responsibility for it, but they are. So, uh, yeah, I know. I know. So here's something. And so in July, 2020, Carlson's head writer, Blake Neff resigned after CNN business reported that he had been using a pseudonym to post remarks that were widely described as racist, sexist, and homophobic on auto admit a message board known for its lack of moderation of offensive and, uh,
01:00:57
Speaker
Just like Twitter content. Do what? So so so Elon's version of Twitter. Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah. Which makes sense. It all it all comes full circle. You think he's going to you think he's going to make it profitable or you think he's going to have to follow up on that thing?
01:01:14
Speaker
I don't know. I mean, there's a lot of talk that he's, you know, cause he comes from payment processing. That's like his background, Elon Musk. So there was a lot of talk that he was going to try to make it into some sort of like payment thing, payment thing. And you know, if he does that, I don't know. He's not like, he's not stupid. He's not stupid, but he's also not like crazy. He's not as crazy, like, you know, smart and business oriented as people think, you know, like he's definitely got some,
01:01:40
Speaker
He takes a lot of credit, you know, for stuff that he doesn't necessarily innovate or put in, put into production or put into place like Donald Trump, like Donald Trump. Yeah, honestly. Yeah. I mean, like the whole thing with him being so mad at open AI is like, you know, it's kind of funny because he helped fund open AI. And it's really seems like anyway, from from the view, from my view, that he's just mad that he didn't get the accolades, you know,
01:02:08
Speaker
And then he signs that open letter saying pause AI and then while at the same time he's like hiring AI engineers and trying to do his own AI stuff. It's just the guy is just, it's just a perfect fit. It's a perfect fucking fit for Tucker Carlson to go there. It really is. It makes so much sense. It's going to be like, they're basically just, they're going to merge with truth social. Let's just, they're going to be their own. They're just going to be one big conglomerate of bullshit.
01:02:32
Speaker
Do you think that's going to be their name? No, that's the tagline. It'll be Twitter. It'll be Twitter truth. Kevin is the marketing guru.
01:02:44
Speaker
So we're almost done guys. We're almost done. Uh, October, 2020, Tucker Carlson tonight averaged 5.3 million viewers with the show's monthly average becoming the highest of any cable news program in the history in history, not the history. I don't know why I said that the history of the history, the history of history defeats itself. The history literally defeated itself with those numbers. Um, here's some, here's some nice things that, uh,
01:03:11
Speaker
that Tucker has said or tweeted in regards to the January 6th attempt to overthrow the election, quote, it's not how white men fight.
01:03:22
Speaker
That was nice. I remember that one. That was nice. In regards to Trump. The weird part was that that was exactly how white men fought. Yeah. Yeah. It turns out turns out he's on so many levels. In regards to Trump, quote, what what he what he's good at is destroying things. He's the undisputed world champion of that. He could easily destroy us if we play it wrong.
01:03:51
Speaker
which proves he's a little bitch. So in a text on November 9, Carlson referred to Powell's Dominion claims, commenting, the software shit is absurd. Carlson then said on television that night, we don't know anything about the software that many say was rigged. We don't know. We ought to find out. So basically in the background, he's saying like, no, of course, this isn't stolen. And then he goes on air and he's like, this is stolen. So here is the job to do at Fox News.
Tucker Carlson's Departure from Fox News
01:04:21
Speaker
on the morning of Monday, April 24th, 2023. Fox news dismissed Carlin and the executive producer of his evening show. And this is my favorite thing I'm ever going to read. Carlin had no anticipation of this dismissal, given that on Friday, April 21st, and what would be his final show sign off, he told his viewers that he would be back on Monday. So
01:04:51
Speaker
I guess my thing is this. Where'd he go? He never came. It's seriously, I mean, these people, they can't wait around all day. They got to shoot people through doors and cars in the driveway. They got a fucking, where's Tucker? Come back.
01:05:07
Speaker
So my fear, I don't know, so this isn't necessarily history repeating itself, which it kind of is, or defeating itself, because it seems like every time they get rid of one of these monsters, they're like a goddamn Hydra. So you kept the head off of one and another horrible, more perverse- Yeah, Rush Limbaugh finally dies. Gross version of him comes back. And then Tucker Carlson comes, there'll be somebody else that's- So I'm very terrified, although I am very happy that he's no longer on the air, I'm very terrified of who the fuck are they gonna bring in to replace him.
01:05:36
Speaker
Yeah. So, gentlemen, it's me, guys. Here's the Fox News doing something right once out of a billion. What was that? Oh, firing him? Yes, for firing him. All right. Now take off your pants. Join us next time when Greg profiles Don Lemon.
01:06:00
Speaker
And and then our three part series. Oh, fuck. And Kevin will do Elon Musk. Not as an episode. I'm a fucking with consent with consent with open air. I'll show you open a I'm going to open up your air right now. OK. It's your anus. OK. Good night, guys. Thanks for listening.