Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Age Gaps & Old Man Peen + Old Scrote Hits NVM Bingo
40 Plays4 years ago
We break down how age gap relationships contribute to women's inequality and are often exploitatitive. The scrote in this week's roast might be the worst thus far. NVM = Negative Value Man
Follow us!
Patreon: www.patreon.com/TheFemaleDatingStrategy
Website: www.thefemaledatingstrategy.com
Twitter: @femdatstrat
Instagram: @_thefemaledatingstrategy
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/The-Female-Dating-Strategy-109118567480771
Sources:
1. Age Gap info
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_disparity_in_sexual_relationships
2. Unicef - child marriage
https://www.unicef.org/protection/child-marriage
3. Downside of marriage for women: The greater a wife’s age gap from her husband, the lower her life expectancy
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/05/100512062631.htm
4. Men want to remarry, women don't
https://time.com/3584827/pew-marriage-divorce-remarriage/
5. Pregnancy and childbirth are leading causes of death in teenage girls in developing countries
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC411126/
6. Median age first marriage
https://www.infoplease.com/us/family-statistics/median-age-first-marriage-1890-2010
7. Born sexy yesterday
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0thpEyEwi80
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Patreon Goals
00:00:00
Speaker
What's up, queens?
00:00:01
Speaker
It's your host, Ro.
00:00:02
Speaker
Do you like female dating strategy?
00:00:04
Speaker
Would you like to see us expand on a lot of different platforms?
00:00:07
Speaker
Then please sign up for our Patreon.
00:00:08
Speaker
We are currently targeting a $10,000 per month goal, which would allow us to work full time on female dating strategy content in order to expand on different platforms and upgrade our media presence.
00:00:20
Speaker
As a special thank you to our current Patreon subscribers, we will be increasing our upload rate for our bonus content to be weekly on Fridays, as well as offering a special discount for paid annual memberships.
00:00:33
Speaker
So please check out our Patreon at patreon.com forward slash the female dating strategy.
00:00:37
Speaker
That's patreon.com forward slash the female dating strategy.
00:00:40
Speaker
Thank you.
00:00:41
Speaker
Let's start the show.
Christine's Story with an Older Man
00:00:42
Speaker
This roast to scrote is from Christine.
00:00:44
Speaker
She starts out saying, Hi, Queens.
00:00:46
Speaker
Here's my story.
00:00:47
Speaker
Disclaimer that I was a raging pick me back in the day, but I've since grown a lot since finding FDS two years ago.
00:00:53
Speaker
I was 26 when I met him and he was 45.
00:00:56
Speaker
Oh, no.
00:00:56
Speaker
Okay.
00:00:58
Speaker
Bracing ourselves.
00:00:59
Speaker
We're straight out of gates.
00:01:00
Speaker
Bracing ourselves right out of gates.
00:01:02
Speaker
Okay.
00:01:02
Speaker
He refused to tell me his age until the second date.
00:01:05
Speaker
I had to ask him four or five times.
00:01:07
Speaker
First red flag.
00:01:08
Speaker
But I thought, oh, he's so mature because he had a job.
00:01:13
Speaker
The boss in hell.
00:01:14
Speaker
He's mature because he has a job.
00:01:17
Speaker
The boss in hell.
00:01:19
Speaker
The standards that you have when you're in your teens and 20s because you don't know better.
00:01:24
Speaker
And that's why old men go after young women, because the standards are so much lower, right?
00:01:28
Speaker
Yeah, yeah.
00:01:29
Speaker
He has a job.
00:01:30
Speaker
He has a car.
00:01:32
Speaker
He has his own space in his own room that he shares with his brother.
00:01:36
Speaker
He has his own twin bed in his room that he shares with his brother.
00:01:40
Speaker
Oh, God.
00:01:41
Speaker
He has a bunk bed.
00:01:41
Speaker
Wow, you have ketchup packets from Wendy's?
00:01:45
Speaker
Amazing.
00:01:46
Speaker
He's got a bed frame.
00:01:47
Speaker
He's got a bed frame.
00:01:50
Speaker
I'm going to talk about this every episode until every man in America has a bed frame.
00:01:55
Speaker
I don't care, you guys.
00:01:56
Speaker
I'm going rogue.
00:01:57
Speaker
My last ex refused to work, so I thought this was an upgrade.
00:02:00
Speaker
I had no standards.
00:02:01
Speaker
I met him while I was an intern at his company and he, oh my gosh, okay.
00:02:05
Speaker
And he hit on me about three weeks into my eight week internship.
00:02:07
Speaker
Then one of his exes, also a younger woman who was his subordinate, came to me and tried to warn me about him, saying that he hit on all the interns, especially interns in my ethnic group.
00:02:17
Speaker
Oh man.
00:02:18
Speaker
Okay.
00:02:19
Speaker
At the time, I convinced myself she was just jealous and I ignored her warning signs.
00:02:23
Speaker
Commence our first date where I found out that he drove a beat up 20 year old car because he refused to shell out money for a newer car.
00:02:29
Speaker
I also drove an old car because I was a poor grad student.
00:02:33
Speaker
He said, I like you more because you're not materialistic.
00:02:36
Speaker
Girl.
00:02:38
Speaker
Oh, this is painful.
00:02:39
Speaker
Yeah.
00:02:40
Speaker
When guys praise you for not being materialistic, that's grooming.
00:02:43
Speaker
They're cheap.
00:02:44
Speaker
And they're cheap as fuck as well.
00:02:46
Speaker
They're just trying to manage down.
00:02:48
Speaker
You touched on one of the episodes, Liz.
00:02:49
Speaker
When they're praising you for being compliant,
Exploitation in Age Gap Relationships
00:02:54
Speaker
they know what they're doing.
00:02:54
Speaker
You're going to get your right.
00:02:56
Speaker
It's grooming.
00:02:57
Speaker
They're grooming you to have low standards, yeah.
00:03:00
Speaker
I still can't get over her last boyfriend refused to work.
00:03:03
Speaker
I'm like, how are you in a relationship with someone who refuses to work?
00:03:07
Speaker
And how do they refuse to work?
00:03:09
Speaker
They just, what do they do?
00:03:10
Speaker
Just eat out of the trash?
00:03:12
Speaker
I don't understand.
00:03:15
Speaker
I don't understand that mindset.
00:03:17
Speaker
No, he mooches off of a woman.
00:03:18
Speaker
That's the thing.
00:03:19
Speaker
Guys who don't work mooch off of a woman.
00:03:22
Speaker
That's what they do.
00:03:22
Speaker
True.
00:03:23
Speaker
Do they just think I'm just not going to go to work today?
00:03:25
Speaker
Yeah.
00:03:26
Speaker
So you're not materialistic, Reid.
00:03:28
Speaker
He knew I wouldn't ask much from him.
00:03:30
Speaker
He took me on a grand total of three dates where he actually paid and then started expecting me to go 50-50 just to cover our meals since, quote, I knew he was broke.
00:03:39
Speaker
How does he have 20 years on you and he's broke?
00:03:42
Speaker
Girl, are you dating a broke sugar daddy?
00:03:43
Speaker
A broke old man?
00:03:45
Speaker
A broke middle-aged man?
00:03:46
Speaker
Yeah, he's a splendid daddy.
00:03:48
Speaker
Yeah, like, here's the thing.
00:03:50
Speaker
If you're going to date, first of all, I don't recommend dating older men.
00:03:52
Speaker
But if you are, he has to be rich.
00:03:54
Speaker
Like, otherwise, there's no point.
00:03:56
Speaker
Like, what's the point?
00:03:58
Speaker
If he's poor and middle-aged, he's literally worthless.
00:04:01
Speaker
He's actually worse than worthless.
00:04:02
Speaker
He's, like, taking away your worth.
00:04:04
Speaker
Do you enjoy, like, limp geriatric peen or something?
00:04:09
Speaker
I don't understand.
00:04:10
Speaker
I've never dated a guy this old, so it's hard for me to wrap my head around it.
00:04:15
Speaker
Right?
00:04:15
Speaker
Like, it's hard for me to wrap my head around what's sexually attractive about a middle-aged man.
00:04:20
Speaker
The only perk would be if he has more resources to, like, take you on trips or places you've never seen before.
00:04:26
Speaker
But this guy is not even remotely impressive.
00:04:28
Speaker
Yeah, I've been roasting incels on Twitter the past few days and how they have this fantasy that when they're 40, they're going to be more attractive.
00:04:35
Speaker
And I'm like, 99% of men will never be that successful.
00:04:38
Speaker
Like,
00:04:39
Speaker
You know, there's a reason why most women prefer men their own age.
00:04:45
Speaker
It's because young men are also attractive, just like young women are.
00:04:49
Speaker
And the only time a young woman would go for an old man is if there was a huge, huge, huge buffer, like a shit, shit ton of money.
00:04:55
Speaker
So if he's broke, there's no point.
00:04:58
Speaker
Like, he has no worth.
00:04:59
Speaker
And that amount of money gets higher every year as women's overall income increases, right?
00:05:04
Speaker
So maybe six figures would have been impressive and also inflation, but maybe six figures would have been impressive like 30 years ago.
00:05:12
Speaker
But yeah, no, he has to be at least a millionaire.
00:05:14
Speaker
It's just not likely to be worth it.
00:05:17
Speaker
Yeah.
00:05:17
Speaker
For women now, unless you're just really, really, really, really desperate.
00:05:21
Speaker
And then you're talking women who are more likely sex workers.
00:05:24
Speaker
Yeah, since I knew he was broke.
00:05:27
Speaker
I got a beautiful new car after I graduated.
00:05:29
Speaker
He sold his car, hoping to just use mine.
00:05:32
Speaker
What the fuck?
00:05:33
Speaker
So he's cheap.
00:05:34
Speaker
Okay.
00:05:34
Speaker
He's pathologically cheap.
00:05:36
Speaker
He's a user.
00:05:37
Speaker
And I don't know why.
00:05:39
Speaker
I don't know why these men are so comfortable driving other people's cars.
00:05:42
Speaker
I would never give a guy my car, fuck that noise, ever.
00:05:46
Speaker
Even if I'm not using it, ever.
00:05:47
Speaker
Get your own.
00:05:48
Speaker
He slowly revealed himself to be misogynistic, cheap, narcissistic.
00:05:51
Speaker
Slowly revealed.
00:05:52
Speaker
Girl, he was like that from the beginning.
00:05:54
Speaker
Since it was present on day one.
00:05:55
Speaker
I hate to break it to you.
00:05:56
Speaker
I was going to say, slowly.
00:06:00
Speaker
I was going to say, slowly.
00:06:03
Speaker
It was about as slow as a rocket launching into space.
00:06:07
Speaker
No offense.
00:06:07
Speaker
This is the roast to scrote, not roast to queen, okay?
00:06:10
Speaker
Sorry, we love you.
00:06:12
Speaker
Sorry.
00:06:15
Speaker
I'm sorry.
00:06:16
Speaker
I'm sorry.
00:06:16
Speaker
I'm sorry, Clarissa.
00:06:17
Speaker
I'm sorry.
00:06:17
Speaker
He slowly revealed himself to be misogynistic, cheap, narcissistic leech.
00:06:22
Speaker
He constantly disrespected me and hit on other women in front of me, even my own friends and classmates.
00:06:27
Speaker
He ditched me on his 50th.
00:06:29
Speaker
Wait, you were with him for five years?
00:06:30
Speaker
I don't.
00:06:34
Speaker
You met him when... So he was 50 and you were 31.
00:06:37
Speaker
Oh, okay.
00:06:40
Speaker
He left... He ditched me on his 50th birthday to go party with his two 20-something female co-workers and left his equally gross friend to take care of me.
00:06:48
Speaker
He let one of said friends feel me up during a party and he did nothing
Misogyny and Control in Relationships
00:06:52
Speaker
and he defended his friend.
00:06:53
Speaker
No!
00:06:55
Speaker
He frequently complained about how America is ageist.
00:07:04
Speaker
America's ageist against men?
00:07:07
Speaker
Fuck off.
00:07:09
Speaker
And why aren't age gap relationships more normalized?
00:07:13
Speaker
Oh, what the fuck?
00:07:14
Speaker
Oh, so if you won't fuck old men, if you're not pro-pedophile, you're ageist.
00:07:18
Speaker
Yeah, I've seen guys say like, you're an age-phobe if you won't have sex with older men.
00:07:25
Speaker
Fuck off.
00:07:26
Speaker
Anyways.
00:07:26
Speaker
Age-phobia.
00:07:27
Speaker
What the fuck?
00:07:28
Speaker
Age phobia?
00:07:29
Speaker
Is that a new phobia?
00:07:31
Speaker
New phobia just dropped, guys.
00:07:33
Speaker
It's called age phobia.
00:07:34
Speaker
It's when you refuse to touch an old man's peen.
00:07:36
Speaker
It's very discriminatory and you should be ashamed.
00:07:39
Speaker
Expand your mind, you know, really, really examine your own, your prejudice.
00:07:43
Speaker
Check your privilege.
00:07:45
Speaker
Yeah, it's hate speech, actually.
00:07:47
Speaker
You're not willing to jump in there on some old man knob.
00:07:50
Speaker
Check your young woman privilege.
00:07:51
Speaker
Cause you know, as we all know, young women are super privileged in today's society, right?
00:07:55
Speaker
Like we're definitely not exploited at all.
00:07:57
Speaker
But anyways, um, he was mad that he couldn't go to a club and have 21 year old women find him attractive anymore.
00:08:02
Speaker
Complained about how he couldn't find women in their forties or over attractive.
00:08:06
Speaker
Wow.
00:08:07
Speaker
Okay.
00:08:07
Speaker
That's ageist buddy.
00:08:08
Speaker
Like he,
00:08:09
Speaker
Men think women are ageist if we don't want to date old men, but then they don't want to date old women or older women or women their own age, and they don't consider themselves ageist.
00:08:18
Speaker
You see how men make their personal sexual failures into a political and social crisis?
00:08:24
Speaker
You see how they easily politicize and weaponize it?
00:08:27
Speaker
I mean, it's just, it's really, really amazing the way their mind always goes to this idea like, this is a society-right problem, you know, rather than just being like, maybe you're just...
00:08:37
Speaker
Not popping anymore.
00:08:39
Speaker
Yeah.
00:08:39
Speaker
Maybe you're just not cool anymore, buddy.
00:08:41
Speaker
Like, just get over it.
00:08:42
Speaker
Like, you know what?
00:08:43
Speaker
One thing I've learned is that all men have this pathological fear of being seen as a creepy old man.
00:08:49
Speaker
But some men are more in denial about the fact, like once they get there, some men are more in denial about the fact that they're creepy old men than others.
00:08:59
Speaker
This is a guy who's who's deluded himself into thinking he's not a creepy old man when he is he should just embrace that with his whole heart.
00:09:06
Speaker
He's a creepy old man and stop harassing young women.
00:09:09
Speaker
He couldn't find women over 40 attractive as my best friend, even though as my best friend put it, he looked like Deadpool, the actual character, not Ryan Reynolds with a beer belly and chicken legs.
00:09:21
Speaker
I mean, I'm struggling to see what so many women found attractive in this guy.
00:09:25
Speaker
I mean, he clearly was able to get much younger women up until 50, which is mind-boggling to me.
00:09:32
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:33
Speaker
And he's not even rich.
00:09:34
Speaker
He's broke.
00:09:35
Speaker
There's no benefit.
00:09:37
Speaker
He's broke as fuck.
00:09:39
Speaker
I'm actually confused, to be honest.
00:09:42
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:43
Speaker
So...
00:09:44
Speaker
Here's the thing, though.
00:09:44
Speaker
A lot of men like this are very good at manipulating women.
00:09:47
Speaker
And it sounds like the whole ageist comments, like they will manipulate your like if he meets a woman who's very like social justicey and cares about things like racism or homophobia, he'll use, you know, the ageist thing or will use her sense of rightness as a way of.
00:10:04
Speaker
Like, very narcissistic and manipulative people are drawn to people who are conscientious.
00:10:08
Speaker
And this guy sounds like that.
00:10:10
Speaker
He sounds like someone who's manipulating her sense of conscientiousness.
00:10:14
Speaker
He wanted to seem like a single guy, a single party guy at work, where he admitted there was a high turnover and he could flirt with a steady stream of new graduates and young interns and refuse to take me to any of his work events.
00:10:26
Speaker
So he's openly cheating on you.
00:10:27
Speaker
Okay.
00:10:27
Speaker
But not even just that.
00:10:28
Speaker
I'm like, this is the type of guy that Me Too was made for.
00:10:31
Speaker
Yes.
00:10:32
Speaker
I mean, this man is absolutely disgusting.
00:10:34
Speaker
Yeah, he's a predator.
00:10:35
Speaker
I mean, just imagine you get your first job and some middle-aged, like stuck in middle management scrote is trying to slob you down within minutes of you getting hired.
00:10:46
Speaker
And I'm just shocked.
00:10:47
Speaker
He must know somebody, but I'm shocked that companies are keeping him around as this much of a liability.
00:10:52
Speaker
But then again, apparently it's his company.
00:10:54
Speaker
That's what the story says.
00:10:55
Speaker
Oh, yeah.
00:10:56
Speaker
Okay.
00:10:57
Speaker
So it's even worse.
00:10:58
Speaker
Oh, yeah.
00:10:59
Speaker
Don't sis.
00:11:00
Speaker
Oh, yeah.
00:11:01
Speaker
If it's his company, girl, don't fuck the boss.
00:11:03
Speaker
Yeah, no.
00:11:04
Speaker
In the episode where we talk about vetting men from the first encounter and we say, like, be wary of the quote unquote entrepreneurial types because a lot of them are very, very cheap.
00:11:12
Speaker
And, you know, they're all about like reducing overhead and like cutting costs.
00:11:16
Speaker
And they bring that attitude into their relationships.
00:11:19
Speaker
That's why he's gotten away with this.
00:11:21
Speaker
Honestly, I would put... And this is just an aside.
00:11:24
Speaker
Like, go on Glassdoor or something.
00:11:26
Speaker
Like, alert people to the fact that he's like this.
00:11:29
Speaker
Do other women a solid.
00:11:30
Speaker
Go to Yelp.
00:11:31
Speaker
Because he's done it with other women as well.
00:11:33
Speaker
Like, he's an actual predator.
00:11:34
Speaker
Like...
00:11:35
Speaker
He's a serial predator.
00:11:36
Speaker
Yeah.
00:11:37
Speaker
Yeah, for sure.
00:11:37
Speaker
Because she said that he did it with, and especially because he seems to have a type as well, like the young, I guess, like ethnically diverse intern.
00:11:47
Speaker
It's so fucked up.
00:11:50
Speaker
What a scrot.
00:11:51
Speaker
Yeah.
00:11:52
Speaker
I'm like shuddering here.
00:11:54
Speaker
Yeah, this guy's... He tried to tell me none of his co-workers liked me when I hadn't even met half of them, which is a red flag because that means he's been talking shit about you.
00:12:03
Speaker
And he's triangulating.
00:12:05
Speaker
If someone says, oh, all these people don't like you, he's triangulating.
00:12:08
Speaker
But if someone says, oh, all these people you haven't even met don't like you, like, how would they know not to like you?
00:12:14
Speaker
Because of the things that he said, that's why.
00:12:18
Speaker
He says...
00:12:19
Speaker
If I went, he would make sure I'd have a miserable time.
00:12:22
Speaker
He also had an extremely inappropriate relationship with a younger female co-worker who was married to another man, including storing bags of her breast milk in his freezer after she had her second child.
00:12:33
Speaker
But they were just friends and get off his back when she called at 3am.
00:12:38
Speaker
I'm losing track of all the women involved in the story, honestly.
00:12:41
Speaker
I'm not even like a third through the story.
00:12:43
Speaker
Like, this is a lot.
00:12:46
Speaker
Then the misogyny.
00:12:47
Speaker
He told me he was glad he had a son because I did it right the first time.
00:12:51
Speaker
Mind you, he also bragged about being a part-time dad and saw his kid for a few hours and one overnight every other weekend and left his ex-wife a few months after his child was born, calling her a controlling bitch.
00:13:03
Speaker
Of course, she tricked me into having a child.
00:13:06
Speaker
If there was ever a low-value bingo card or a negative-value bingo card, he would get a full fucking house.
00:13:14
Speaker
Yeah.
00:13:15
Speaker
Every single square.
00:13:16
Speaker
Every single square.
00:13:18
Speaker
Yeah.
00:13:18
Speaker
Connect four.
00:13:19
Speaker
Not even connect four.
00:13:20
Speaker
Every single square would be filled.
00:13:22
Speaker
It would be connect a hundred because this guy would just go.
00:13:25
Speaker
Yeah.
00:13:27
Speaker
The whole paper would just be covered in ink.
00:13:30
Speaker
Yeah, I'm almost just extremely confused.
00:13:32
Speaker
I mean, he must be very wealthy if he has this many employees.
00:13:36
Speaker
That's the only thing I can think of.
00:13:37
Speaker
But is he hiring a lot of interns who are foreigners?
00:13:43
Speaker
Is he hiring a lot of people who need a work visa?
00:13:47
Speaker
Because that's the only thing.
00:13:48
Speaker
I just can't imagine him treating people like this for this long.
00:13:51
Speaker
But unless he's taking advantage of a population that's really vulnerable and might not know better.
00:13:56
Speaker
So the next paragraph is a doozy.
00:13:59
Speaker
He also openly wondered why rape was such a big deal, because it's just sex.
00:14:04
Speaker
I asked if he would mind if a woman he didn't find attractive or another guy had his way with him against his will, if he would still think that's okay.
00:14:11
Speaker
He says, of course, that's different.
00:14:14
Speaker
He hated any female leads in movies that kicked ass and was independent, insisting, that's unrealistic and stupid.
00:14:23
Speaker
He even said that if one of his male friends hit on me or forced themselves on me, that it was my fault because the woman has to say no and resist.
00:14:31
Speaker
Men are hunters.
00:14:32
Speaker
And affairs were always the woman's fault because men can't control themselves.
00:14:37
Speaker
He literally said that if crime was legal, such as the Purge, he would go out and find the youngest, most petite, prettiest woman and force himself on them.
00:14:45
Speaker
His dream vacation was to go to Bangkok so he could party with underage girls, but he was too afraid to get on a plane.
00:14:51
Speaker
Girl!
Christine's Journey to Independence
00:14:53
Speaker
The only thing holding him back from being a fucking sex tourist pedophile... Is fear of flying.
00:14:59
Speaker
He's afraid of airplanes.
00:15:01
Speaker
Is fear of flying.
00:15:02
Speaker
That's it.
00:15:02
Speaker
Wow.
00:15:03
Speaker
I can't even think of a place that has more red flags than like Lenin's funeral to describe this clusterfuck of a man.
00:15:11
Speaker
I don't know.
00:15:13
Speaker
I almost...
00:15:14
Speaker
Just thinking of myself in my early 20s, this is the type of man that I would probably get fired because I would have absolutely gone in on every one of his talking points and then gotten myself fired.
00:15:28
Speaker
Because I wouldn't have been able to sit there and listen to it.
00:15:30
Speaker
But this is the type of guy that wraps you up.
00:15:32
Speaker
Because I'm...
00:15:33
Speaker
I wouldn't have fallen for his crap, but I would have gotten wrapped up and trying to refute all the bullshit in his head.
00:15:38
Speaker
Yeah, you would have gotten... You would have gone down of wanting to clap back.
00:15:41
Speaker
Hell yeah.
00:15:42
Speaker
I would have gone down the rabbit hole of trying to absolutely, like, getting... I would have gotten sucked into his madness and trying to completely undo his worldview.
00:15:50
Speaker
And maybe that's why I'm here at Female Dating Strategy now.
00:15:54
Speaker
But this is... Like, this entire conversation triggers me from top to bottom because I'm like...
00:16:00
Speaker
Everything he says, you're like, I want to fight him.
00:16:02
Speaker
I want to fight him.
00:16:03
Speaker
Because I remember being young and starting my career and having like having similar conversations with middle aged men who would come and just say like very, very controlling shitty things to me.
00:16:17
Speaker
And I actually remember a specific incident.
00:16:20
Speaker
where I was deciding whether or not I wanted to go to, to school, go back to school.
00:16:25
Speaker
And this guy was like, well, if you get too educated, then, uh, your boyfriend's not going to want to be with you and saying things like that to kind of discourage me from making decisions and then saying, well, Oh guys, your age are immature anyway.
00:16:37
Speaker
So you should date older men like me.
00:16:38
Speaker
And I remember men like this coming at me at that age and me like having somewhat of a smart mouth, like always like clapping back at them.
00:16:46
Speaker
Um, um,
00:16:47
Speaker
And I remember just that feeling of powerlessness because it was literally a lot of times me because other women would be afraid to say anything and the other men would tacitly agree, right?
00:16:58
Speaker
So this like completely uneven power balance, we just have this old scrote who runs this company and just like shits in the spirit of every young woman that he comes across honestly triggers me.
00:17:09
Speaker
Like it's almost
00:17:11
Speaker
Like everything he says, I can feel like the blood pressure rising in my body.
00:17:16
Speaker
Yeah, no, everything he says is strange for me too.
00:17:19
Speaker
And I've gotten fired for that, for being the clapbacker.
00:17:22
Speaker
Yeah, so when people talk about like, oh, well, you just have to set your boundaries in the workplace.
00:17:27
Speaker
There are consequences to directly confronting.
00:17:29
Speaker
So there's really no right way to do this.
00:17:32
Speaker
So I think we should maybe, it's good to point that out while we're going through the rest of the story.
00:17:36
Speaker
You got to take him down.
00:17:37
Speaker
Like if you're going down, you got to take him down with you.
00:17:39
Speaker
Hell yeah.
00:17:40
Speaker
You got to put, you got to kamikaze you that shit.
00:17:42
Speaker
Okay.
00:17:43
Speaker
And here's the thing.
00:17:44
Speaker
The time that I got fired, um, the guy that like my boss who I had reported for being a fucking creep and a misogynist, uh, he got fired like two weeks after me.
00:17:54
Speaker
So I got, I got fired, but also he got fired.
00:17:57
Speaker
So, I mean, I thought it was worth it.
00:17:58
Speaker
And then I just went and found another job.
00:18:00
Speaker
Yeah.
00:18:00
Speaker
Anyways, so part two of this story.
00:18:03
Speaker
He was wanting to retire or he was waiting to retire knowing that I would keep working and he was hoping to use me as his retirement fund.
00:18:10
Speaker
He bragged that I could go out and play sports and you'll come home and find me on the couch in front of the TV.
00:18:15
Speaker
So he expected me to work full time, come home and cook for him and clean up after him while he literally sat there doing nothing.
00:18:21
Speaker
Ladies, he just told me my future and I still stayed like an idiot.
00:18:25
Speaker
Sis.
00:18:26
Speaker
It's okay.
00:18:27
Speaker
I'm glad you're here with us now.
00:18:29
Speaker
That's all I can say.
00:18:31
Speaker
He fought with me when my family was taking me out for graduation lunch and God forbid he would have to pay.
00:18:39
Speaker
Oh, God.
00:18:40
Speaker
Why didn't your family, like, kidnap you and take you away from this man?
00:18:43
Speaker
Like, if you were, like, my sister or something, I would have been intervened.
00:18:47
Speaker
I'm like, this guy is insane.
00:18:49
Speaker
Yeah.
00:18:50
Speaker
He refused to go unless he got a guarantee that he wouldn't have to pay a penny.
00:18:53
Speaker
A few years later, my aunt from overseas came for a visit and we took her out to an expensive steakhouse, which my brother and I covered.
00:19:00
Speaker
All he had to pay was $40 in tip.
00:19:02
Speaker
The bill was over $200.
00:19:02
Speaker
And he repeatedly returned his steak because it wasn't well done enough.
00:19:07
Speaker
You could see how annoyed the waiter was getting.
00:19:09
Speaker
He reluctantly handed the money over and was visibly annoyed and then started a fight with me in the car ride home and saying that I lied to him because I assured he wouldn't have to pay.
00:19:18
Speaker
I meant the meal, but I feel like he should have at least offered to pay the tip.
00:19:21
Speaker
Yet he was adamant about never being with a gold digger.
00:19:26
Speaker
about coal diggers he's got no fucking gold to dig yeah he's got no fucking gold to dig it's all coal and dirt and shit in his mind oh it's always the broke guys that worry about gold diggers always them always yeah yeah that's the thing ladies if a guy says anything negative about gold diggers he's broke he's broke red flag walk away he's he's uh he's the gold digger
00:19:53
Speaker
I've learned that almost everything that men say to women negatively is projection.
00:19:57
Speaker
Projection.
00:19:57
Speaker
Yeah.
00:19:58
Speaker
It's projection.
00:19:59
Speaker
When a guy says that he hates gold diggers, what he means is if I were a hot woman, I would be a gold digger.
00:20:04
Speaker
And he's probably still going to be a gold digger in some way, even if he's ugly.
00:20:07
Speaker
He would also like, okay, he would also drive like a maniac in my car, rack up speeding red light tickets, and then told me that it was my car and that he didn't do it.
00:20:15
Speaker
I had to fight with him to get him to agree to pay half of the ticket.
00:20:18
Speaker
Yeah.
00:20:19
Speaker
That's the kind of guy that's going to get your license suspended.
00:20:22
Speaker
I'm just struggling to know what you saw in him, to be honest.
00:20:24
Speaker
Like, I'm trying to think of even one redeeming quality about this man.
00:20:28
Speaker
I mean, he's probably, he sounds like someone who's just very charming and manipulative.
00:20:31
Speaker
That's his only skill.
00:20:32
Speaker
Yeah, true.
00:20:33
Speaker
And then there was the porn sickness.
00:20:35
Speaker
He suffered from ED.
00:20:36
Speaker
So he didn't even have good dick?
00:20:38
Speaker
Girl!
00:20:38
Speaker
Anyways, then there was the porn sickness.
00:20:40
Speaker
He suffered from erectile dysfunction and couldn't keep it up without constant simulation for more than a few seconds.
00:20:46
Speaker
It got to the point where he had to watch porn, preferably women of my ethnicity, to keep himself going.
00:20:52
Speaker
When I confronted him about it, he fought me that it was no big deal and all men look at pints.
00:20:56
Speaker
I would deal with that.
00:20:57
Speaker
The last straw came when he ditched me for 30 minutes on a cruise to go flirt with a 19-year-old that he had been creepily eyeing up the whole time.
00:21:05
Speaker
He then proceeded to fight with me for two days defending himself and I was stuck in the middle of the ocean with this creep.
00:21:10
Speaker
Of course, when I went to talk to a good-looking guy younger than him, he got jealous and whined.
00:21:15
Speaker
Of course.
00:21:17
Speaker
At the time, he knew I wanted to get married and he dangled in front of me.
00:21:20
Speaker
Why would you want to marry this guy?
00:21:22
Speaker
That sounds like a fucking prison sentence.
00:21:25
Speaker
Anyways, and he dangled in front of me, alluding, I'll propose when I'm ready.
00:21:29
Speaker
I have no idea when that will be.
00:21:30
Speaker
Sis, if he's saying that, he doesn't want to propose to you.
00:21:33
Speaker
Don't like that's a carrot that men use to dangle in front of women to manipulate them.
00:21:38
Speaker
Lastly, he had the nerve to tell me that if I dumped him, good luck finding a guy who would treat me like he did.
00:21:46
Speaker
I'm coughing.
00:21:47
Speaker
Spit take.
00:21:49
Speaker
Good luck, funny guy.
00:21:50
Speaker
Treats you like shit like I do.
00:21:53
Speaker
Men are fucking delusional.
00:21:55
Speaker
Wow.
00:21:55
Speaker
Anyways, he said I should be lucky that he didn't beat me, cheat on me, or curse me out.
00:22:00
Speaker
Okay.
00:22:01
Speaker
The bar is in hell.
00:22:02
Speaker
Bar.
00:22:04
Speaker
What?
00:22:04
Speaker
No, it's not even that it's in hell, right?
00:22:07
Speaker
It's that it's literally being trampled on by the hooves of...
00:22:13
Speaker
Nosferatu.
00:22:14
Speaker
It's like actually, like even Satan would look at this and be like, what the fuck?
00:22:18
Speaker
After I dumped him, he cried.
00:22:22
Speaker
He cried and said he would propose right then and there.
00:22:25
Speaker
He mistakenly texted me a few times, supposedly meant for the woman he was currently dating.
00:22:30
Speaker
He also asked me months later for help because he never bothered to learn on his, he never bothered to learn his own wifi password and couldn't work remotely.
00:22:38
Speaker
I then blocked him and haven't heard from him for years now.
00:22:41
Speaker
I actually felt bad for him for a while until I realized he was just sad he was losing his gravy train.
00:22:46
Speaker
Says, never let your empathy get in the way of some guy's karma.
00:22:50
Speaker
That is such a hard but important lesson to learn.
00:22:53
Speaker
Your empathy will get in the way of a guy's karma.
00:22:56
Speaker
Yeah, so you should actually be feeling happy that he sucks so bad.
00:23:00
Speaker
Like, you should be happy that you got away from such a piece of shit, man.
00:23:04
Speaker
Like, why feel bad from him?
00:23:05
Speaker
He literally doesn't deserve that.
00:23:07
Speaker
Yeah, so he's just upset that he was losing his gravy train.
00:23:10
Speaker
Looking back, I should have listened to my family and friends' warnings, but also being a recovering codependent, I thought, I can change him!
00:23:16
Speaker
I still went through a period of pygmyism for a couple years after him, but now I'm happily single after leaving an abusive ex, which FDS contributed so much to, like, FDS helped me leave this guy.
00:23:27
Speaker
I have an amazing career as a physical therapist, traveling a lot, saving up lots of money to buy a house, doing some work on my novel, and spending lots of quality time with my family and friends and our little Pekingese dog.
00:23:37
Speaker
I also haven't gotten another red light or speeding ticket since.
00:23:40
Speaker
Love, Christine.
00:23:42
Speaker
Good.
00:23:42
Speaker
I'm proud of you, Christine.
00:23:44
Speaker
I'm glad you got away from this piece of shit.
00:23:45
Speaker
I'm so happy this has a happy ending.
00:23:47
Speaker
Yeah.
00:23:48
Speaker
I'm glad this story has a happy ending for sure.
00:23:50
Speaker
Damn.
00:23:51
Speaker
That relationship honestly sounds traumatic.
00:23:53
Speaker
Yeah, it sounds very legitimately traumatic.
00:23:55
Speaker
And I'm wondering if this is another racialized fetish, I treat women from other cultures like they're beneath me because I'm white situation.
00:24:05
Speaker
I bet, though, he'll be like Big Ed from, like, 90 Day Fiance.
00:24:09
Speaker
And he'll think that if he goes to Thailand or Asia, that all the women will be submissive.
00:24:16
Speaker
But she'll either scam him or dump his ass after she's, you know, taken whatever dregs he has in terms of property.
00:24:24
Speaker
Because that's what he deserves.
00:24:26
Speaker
Like, down to his shoelaces.
00:24:27
Speaker
I hope she takes every fucking thing he owns.
Listener Engagement and Age Gap Discussions
00:24:30
Speaker
All right.
00:24:30
Speaker
So this is our Roast to Scroat.
00:24:32
Speaker
If you'd like to submit your very own Roast to Scroat, please subscribe to our Patreon and you can submit a Roast to Scroat or a Queen Chit or a Nasus where you tell us all about... If you want to roast a pygmy, we haven't gotten any Nasus roasts.
00:24:47
Speaker
Please subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com forward slash the female dating strategy.
00:24:57
Speaker
What's up, queens?
00:24:58
Speaker
Welcome to the Female Dating Strategy Podcast, the meanest female-only podcast on the internet.
00:25:02
Speaker
I'm your host, Ro.
00:25:03
Speaker
And this is Savannah.
00:25:05
Speaker
And I'm Lua.
00:25:06
Speaker
So this episode we're doing today was inspired by one of the Roastest Grotes that we recorded a few weeks ago that we wanted to take time out to actually expand upon.
00:25:17
Speaker
And it was a Roastest Grote centered around an age gap relationship.
00:25:27
Speaker
not beneficial to women, and often exploitative.
00:25:30
Speaker
First of all, I want to point out, actually, that when you Google the phrase myths of age gap relationships, almost every single article is justifying age gap relationships.
00:25:43
Speaker
And I was looking for information about why age gap relationships might be problematic, but almost every single article is like, rule number is like, myth number one, old people are creepy, or like, old men are creepy, and explaining why, like...
00:25:55
Speaker
I'm not a creepy old man because I want to date women 20 years younger than me.
00:25:59
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:00
Speaker
And again, what's the definition of age gap, right?
00:26:04
Speaker
If you're talking anywhere between like two to three years, that's an age gap.
00:26:08
Speaker
But it seems like they're often trying to justify age gaps that are like 10, 15 plus years when the part when at least one of the parties is under 30.
00:26:19
Speaker
Notice how it's always like a specific type of age gap relationship that they're trying to normalize.
00:26:24
Speaker
I think if everybody's above 50 and there's a 75-year-old dating a 60-year-old, I don't think people necessarily have as much of a problem with that.
00:26:32
Speaker
It might even go unnoticed when we talk about these things, mostly because at that age, everybody's a fully grown adult.
00:26:38
Speaker
You're pretty established in whatever your career is or was if you're retired.
00:26:42
Speaker
And there's not as much of an exploitative relationship.
00:26:46
Speaker
relationship between that.
00:26:47
Speaker
But generally, when we talk about age gap relationships and why they're such a problem, we're talking about the fact that there's just a sizable percentage of men who want to be sexually predatory towards women who often have not even finished physically maturing.
00:27:04
Speaker
And we've seen more than enough arguments in our day about men who think that the age of consent should be like 14, 15.
00:27:09
Speaker
Or 12.
00:27:10
Speaker
Yeah.
00:27:12
Speaker
Or 12, or it is, and it is 14, 15, and as low as 12 in some countries.
00:27:16
Speaker
Women who are not even finished, like sexually developing or socially developing.
00:27:21
Speaker
Yeah, so when FDS talks about age gap relationships being problematic, we're not talking about like a 35-year-old woman and a 45-year-old man who start dating.
00:27:29
Speaker
But that relationship would be problematic if they started dating when she was 15 and he was 25, right?
00:27:36
Speaker
So what we're talking about are like very young women under the age of 25 usually dating men who are, I would say, 5 or even...
00:27:47
Speaker
you know, generally you would say like 10 years, 20 years is problematic.
00:27:49
Speaker
I would say even five years can be problematic.
00:27:51
Speaker
Like a 20 year old woman dating a 25 year old man.
00:27:57
Speaker
And the only reason why I've come to this, first of all, disclaimer, like almost every relationship I've ever had, had at least some of an age gap.
00:28:05
Speaker
I think I've only ever dated like maybe three guys where they were within three years of my age.
00:28:11
Speaker
And a lot of those age gap relationships were bad.
00:28:14
Speaker
So that's why I wanted
00:28:16
Speaker
That's why I want to talk about this.
00:28:18
Speaker
But I mean, even just on Reddit, you see all these relationships where... Here's the thing.
00:28:22
Speaker
On almost all of the relationship advice subreddits, when the guy is being a piece of shit, it's almost always an age gap relationship.
00:28:31
Speaker
Like, have you noticed that?
00:28:32
Speaker
Like, it's like, oh, I'm 19 and my boyfriend's trying to, like, pressure me to do anal and he's 31 or something like that.
00:28:39
Speaker
Yeah, 100%.
00:28:39
Speaker
I mean, and...
00:28:42
Speaker
Make no mistake about it.
00:28:43
Speaker
There's a sizable percentage of men who specifically target and sexualize women of like nation ages.
00:28:52
Speaker
I mean, that's what teen porn and barely legal porn is all about, right?
00:28:55
Speaker
Like they like the idea of being able to sexually exploit inexperienced women.
00:28:59
Speaker
And a big part of that is because women of that age don't have...
00:29:04
Speaker
I generally don't have like the social power, social skills or social.
00:29:09
Speaker
They don't have the life experience.
00:29:12
Speaker
Yeah.
00:29:12
Speaker
They don't have the life experience.
00:29:13
Speaker
It will weed out loser ass men.
00:29:15
Speaker
Right.
00:29:15
Speaker
What I'm seeing right now is a very disturbing trend in which, especially online, where they're trying to normalize either sex work or age gap relationships to very young girls.
00:29:26
Speaker
Like I'm talking on like TikTok Instagram.
00:29:28
Speaker
girls who are like 12, 13, 14, 15 years old are seeing talks about other women's sugar daddies or, you know, making tons of money on OnlyFans and all of that.
00:29:38
Speaker
And I do see this as like a very problematic society level of grooming and exploitation of very young women.
00:29:46
Speaker
The other thing is like,
00:29:47
Speaker
When a guy is going after much younger women, usually he's like a massive loser who can't get women his own age.
00:29:55
Speaker
And a lot of guys like cope with it and say, oh, well, maybe I don't want to date women my own age because women my own age are like bitter and jaded and blah, blah, blah.
00:30:04
Speaker
And it's like, no, like women your own age are just like smart and know better and know that you're a bum ass loser.
00:30:10
Speaker
Like younger women are much more easy to impress by a McDonald's meal and a fucking 1998 Camry.
00:30:16
Speaker
And a lot of it's just because younger women have a harder time setting boundaries or escaping their predatory behavior.
00:30:22
Speaker
And all of us can attest to growing up and experiencing puberty and then somewhere around 11, 12, 13, all of a sudden all these perverts come out of nowhere, right?
00:30:31
Speaker
Yeah.
00:30:32
Speaker
Yeah.
00:30:32
Speaker
And you're just inundated with all this male attention out of nowhere.
00:30:36
Speaker
Yeah.
00:30:37
Speaker
And it's really a matter of these guys specifically see this population of girls as specifically vulnerable.
00:30:44
Speaker
Perhaps some of them, it's like a sexual proclivity where they're like, quote unquote, a feeble files, whatever they're called, a feeble files.
00:30:50
Speaker
And these guys that rape underage women, and they tend to be like actually equal opportunity rapists.
00:30:55
Speaker
It's just that women of that age are more likely to be vulnerable because it might be the first time they're
00:31:00
Speaker
somewhere without their parents, right?
00:31:01
Speaker
So they don't necessarily know how to navigate, keep themselves safe.
00:31:04
Speaker
They're easily intimidated.
00:31:06
Speaker
They're much more likely to, you know, make these guys feel powerful because these guys can scare them easier.
00:31:11
Speaker
So sometimes those men are targeting those women, not just for like, quote unquote, sex, but because of the power dynamic being in their favor.
00:31:20
Speaker
There's a really great video called Born Sexy Yesterday on YouTube.
00:31:25
Speaker
Maybe I'll link it in the show notes.
00:31:27
Speaker
And it basically talks about how, like, the ultimate fantasy of every mediocre man is a woman who is super, super naive and doesn't know better and isn't experienced and thinks that he's, like, a god among men just because...
00:31:42
Speaker
he knows how to like make a sandwich or do like mediocre shit.
00:31:46
Speaker
Right.
00:31:46
Speaker
Like they, they want to be seen as they, they want women who are naive and inexperienced because it makes them feel better despite being mediocre.
00:31:54
Speaker
Yeah.
00:31:54
Speaker
They want servants and sycophants, right?
00:31:57
Speaker
Like mommy McBang mates.
00:31:59
Speaker
No, not even my, there's like the mommy McBang mate.
00:32:01
Speaker
And then there's like the servant McBang mate, just like straight up like a servant, just, just straight up like child labor.
00:32:08
Speaker
Yeah, child labour.
00:32:09
Speaker
The emphasis on the naivety and inexperience of these young girls is not to sound patronising.
00:32:17
Speaker
It's just a fact.
00:32:17
Speaker
Like, when you're 21 or when you're 19, 20, 21, you do think you know it all.
00:32:21
Speaker
But then when you get to, like, 24, 25, 26 and plus...
00:32:28
Speaker
You then look back and you just cringe at how much you thought you knew because you know nothing at all.
00:32:37
Speaker
And when you start getting attention from these older men, it does feel flattering, especially when initially they can present themselves as being more mature than guys your own age.
00:32:47
Speaker
Because let's face it, guys who are 18 to 24 tend to not be generally serious.
00:32:54
Speaker
Are fucking scrotes.
00:32:55
Speaker
Like...
00:32:56
Speaker
Yeah, and it isn't even that they're, like, developed scrotes, they're undeveloped scrotes, which is just even more annoying, so... Yeah, they're just, like, immature bathroom humour, can't even buy a McDonald's meal, like, yeah.
00:33:09
Speaker
Yeah, so, but then when you come across this guy who seems established, put together, um...
00:33:17
Speaker
I can definitely sometimes see the appeal, but I remember my dad was once saying to me one time, no well-adjusted man would go for half his age because one of my sisters had like, you know, she was dating a guy who was like 20 years older than her and he was an absolute bum.
00:33:35
Speaker
And my dad was just like, there's no, if a guy goes for a woman substantially younger than him, he's mentally ill.
00:33:41
Speaker
Yeah.
00:33:46
Speaker
Your pops is based.
00:33:49
Speaker
Because I don't know what they'd have in common.
00:33:51
Speaker
Like, what would you talk about if somebody is 20 years older than you?
00:33:55
Speaker
Like, what would you... He just didn't get it.
00:33:58
Speaker
I had a friend... And here's the thing.
00:34:00
Speaker
Like, whenever I have friends that are making bad decisions, I don't just outright tell them, like, this is stupid.
00:34:05
Speaker
You shouldn't do this.
00:34:06
Speaker
Because it just makes them defensive and it gets their back up.
00:34:09
Speaker
Because people shut down.
00:34:10
Speaker
Yeah.
00:34:11
Speaker
Yeah, people shut down when they get attacked like that.
00:34:13
Speaker
And so when...
00:34:15
Speaker
A friend of mine is in... Okay, so a friend of mine was in a relationship with a guy who was at least 20 years older than her.
00:34:22
Speaker
I think she was, like, 21 at the time, and he was, like, 42 or 43.
00:34:27
Speaker
So pretty much, like, twice her age.
00:34:28
Speaker
Her parents were not excited.
00:34:30
Speaker
You know, she would talk to me about, like, you know, my parents are not excited about this relationship, but they met and blah, blah, blah.
00:34:35
Speaker
Imagine, like, meeting your daughter's boyfriend and he's the same age as you.
00:34:39
Speaker
Like, imagine what that must have been like for her dad.
00:34:41
Speaker
Like, gross.
00:34:42
Speaker
Anyways...
00:34:43
Speaker
So I was talking to her and like, my usual thing is to like ask questions in a way that will lead them to realize that it's problematic, but in a way where they think it's their own idea kind of thing.
00:34:57
Speaker
It's kind of like ideological judo or something.
00:35:00
Speaker
I don't know.
00:35:00
Speaker
It's hard to explain.
00:35:01
Speaker
But, you know, over time, like she pretty quickly realized that they didn't have anything to talk about.
00:35:07
Speaker
He's just like geriatric scrote.
00:35:09
Speaker
I said something along the lines of like, oh yeah, imagine when like...
00:35:13
Speaker
I said something along the lines of like, oh, you know how like women die younger than men?
00:35:17
Speaker
You know, imagine what it's going to be like when he's like 80 and you have to like change his diapers, like, haha, kind of thing.
00:35:22
Speaker
And she was just like, ugh.
00:35:23
Speaker
Like,
00:35:24
Speaker
Right.
00:35:25
Speaker
Yeah.
00:35:26
Speaker
It's like they never, I mean, that's the old nurse in a purse thing that happens to older women too.
00:35:32
Speaker
And why actually sometimes, actually maybe I should take back my earlier assertion that older, like age gap relationships can't be exploited for older women as well, because older women complain about much older men who are
00:35:44
Speaker
nearing in on their end of life, needing a woman to take care of them.
00:35:48
Speaker
And then it becomes like an entirely one-sided relationship where they just need a nurse or a purse, a woman with some kind of money because they're destitute or maybe all their kids hate them and they didn't cultivate community relationships.
00:36:00
Speaker
So they need a woman to, who has an established community to be a part of, or they need someone to take care of them physically.
00:36:08
Speaker
So yeah, maybe I take that back.
00:36:10
Speaker
Yeah.
00:36:11
Speaker
Take it back.
00:36:11
Speaker
Like,
00:36:12
Speaker
At FDS, we always promote maximizing female benefit.
00:36:16
Speaker
Women maximally benefit when they marry someone who's around the same age as them.
00:36:21
Speaker
There's a study that shows that, and I'll put it in the show notes, where women who marry men who are much older than them die younger than women who marry men around the same age.
00:36:31
Speaker
The opposite is also the case, where a woman who marries a much younger man also dies younger.
00:36:37
Speaker
We have to remember that age gap relationships where the man is older solely benefits the man.
00:36:42
Speaker
As he goes into his old age, he gets a free nurse and purse, and he has someone to take care of him.
00:36:49
Speaker
Whereas women who marry, you know, the woman that he marries, the younger woman, she's actually more likely to die younger simply by having married him.
Societal Implications of Age Gaps
00:36:58
Speaker
It's very like, you know, men complain about women being gold diggers or whatever, when they date older men, like we should be calling men youth diggers because they're the ones who benefit from dating younger women.
00:37:07
Speaker
They leech on us from cradle to grave.
00:37:09
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:37:11
Speaker
Men literally leech on us from cradle to grave.
00:37:13
Speaker
Sucking the life out of us one teet at a time.
00:37:16
Speaker
Yes, sucking out our life force.
00:37:18
Speaker
Exactly.
00:37:19
Speaker
So, you know, ladies, you're much better off.
00:37:22
Speaker
First of all, honestly, they're not marrying men at all.
00:37:24
Speaker
But if you do insist on marrying someone who is approximately the same age as you.
00:37:27
Speaker
Unmarried women live longer.
00:37:30
Speaker
If you look at all these women who are like 100 years old, you ask them, like, what's the secret to living longer?
00:37:36
Speaker
They say, don't marry men.
00:37:38
Speaker
Like, men are control freaks.
00:37:39
Speaker
Stay away from men.
00:37:40
Speaker
That's like universally their advice.
00:37:42
Speaker
Men too headache.
00:37:43
Speaker
Yeah, men too much of a headache, right?
00:37:45
Speaker
Like, you know, and that's why women are much less likely to remarry.
00:37:50
Speaker
After their husband dies because they're just like, shit, like, I'm free now.
00:37:55
Speaker
Right.
00:37:56
Speaker
And like my grandma's the same way.
00:37:58
Speaker
Like my grandfather on my dad's side is actually was actually a pretty good guy.
00:38:02
Speaker
And they were only two years apart.
00:38:04
Speaker
And they had a great relationship.
00:38:05
Speaker
marriage.
00:38:05
Speaker
They were a very happy couple.
00:38:07
Speaker
They loved each other a lot.
00:38:08
Speaker
But even in that case, after he passed away, she was like, you know what?
00:38:12
Speaker
I hate running a household.
00:38:13
Speaker
I hate cooking.
00:38:14
Speaker
I hate cleaning.
00:38:15
Speaker
So she moved to this sort of like resort for elderly people and is just living her best life.
00:38:20
Speaker
And I'm just so happy for her because she doesn't have to cook.
00:38:22
Speaker
She doesn't have to clean.
00:38:23
Speaker
And she gets to live out her golden years in like queen treatment.
00:38:27
Speaker
So yeah, it just seems, it seems that even when age gap relationships aren't
00:38:34
Speaker
like morally reprehensible, let's say if everybody's like a clear adult and of legal age and well, or even well over legal age, it still isn't always beneficial to women, right?
00:38:46
Speaker
And so I think when we're talking about this, we just have to point out that so many of the relationship dynamics that have been established between men and women are generally at the expense of women.
00:38:57
Speaker
Designed to benefit men.
00:38:59
Speaker
Right, designed to benefit men.
00:39:01
Speaker
So when we're now discussing
00:39:04
Speaker
how to recalibrate relationships so they're more equal, making the age gap smaller is part of it.
00:39:12
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:39:12
Speaker
And in fact, like, you see this even in countries where, like, before recording this episode, we were looking at this Wikipedia page for, if you want to have, if you want to go down a rabbit hole, go look up age disparity in sexual relationships on Wikipedia.
00:39:29
Speaker
Blew my mind.
00:39:30
Speaker
Okay, so first of all, like,
00:39:32
Speaker
In the United States, something like 40% of married couples are within one year of each other, and 20% are the husband two to three years older than the wife.
00:39:43
Speaker
So basically, like, the majority of relationships are the husband and the wife are within three years of one another.
00:39:51
Speaker
But in countries that are less developed or where there's much more extreme inequality between men and women, those are the countries that, first of all, the biggest age gaps.
00:40:00
Speaker
And secondly, where they practice polygamy.
00:40:02
Speaker
So, you know, you've got countries like, yeah, the countries with the greatest age gap are Afghanistan, Bangladesh, Mozambique, Senegal, Nigeria, Australia.
00:40:15
Speaker
Niger, Mauritania, Mali, Liberia.
00:40:18
Speaker
These are all countries that's like not great to be a woman.
00:40:21
Speaker
It tends to be indicative of serious social, economic, legal, political inequality between men and women, because generally in these age gap relationships, younger women have to, first of all, have children much younger than a lot of times they end up in motherhood at a much earlier ages.
00:40:37
Speaker
At the age of 12, like women are getting married off at the age of like, you know, Yemen, you know,
00:40:42
Speaker
seven, eight, nine, 10 year old girls are being married off to like much, much older men.
00:40:47
Speaker
And they're like the second or third wife.
00:40:48
Speaker
There's mountains of evidence about why having a child in your teens and even your early, like early, early twenties, like 20, but especially between the ages of 14 and 18 contributes to women's worldwide inequality.
00:41:04
Speaker
And a lot of it just has to happen.
00:41:05
Speaker
a lot of it just has to do with women not having any opportunity to financially, economically, or socially establish themselves in a way that creates an independence.
00:41:15
Speaker
And so then having a child at that age mandates dependence on men, right, to provide for them.
00:41:22
Speaker
And these men may or may not provide for them, or they may provide for them with extreme stipulations on their freedom.
00:41:28
Speaker
Yeah.
00:41:29
Speaker
I mean, the younger you have a child as a woman,
00:41:32
Speaker
the worse your life will be, like, quite frankly.
00:41:34
Speaker
I mean, first of all, there's the... And that's not just us saying that.
00:41:38
Speaker
That's like the UN.
00:41:39
Speaker
Like, they do tons of studies of this.
00:41:41
Speaker
Yeah.
00:41:42
Speaker
Like, the younger you have a child, the less opportunities women have for education, first of all.
00:41:46
Speaker
You know, just because you have your period when you're 12 doesn't mean you should be having a kid when you're 13, right?
00:41:51
Speaker
The mother of Henry VII...
00:41:54
Speaker
Margaret Beaufort had a child, had her child, Henry VII, when she was 13, and she was rendered infertile for the rest of her life.
00:42:03
Speaker
It was a horrible pregnancy, childbirth, and she almost died from it, okay?
00:42:07
Speaker
So not only do you lose educational opportunities, it actually affects your body, your physical fertility.
00:42:14
Speaker
You risk dying, you're more likely to die in childbirth, and you
00:42:19
Speaker
it's more likely to cause like, what's the word I'm looking for?
00:42:24
Speaker
It actually stunts your physical and mental growth as well.
00:42:27
Speaker
This is important to point out because all these men who claim that in years prior, it was completely normal for men to have sex with like 13, 14 year olds and like women would be having children by then.
00:42:40
Speaker
That's actually not true.
00:42:43
Speaker
From historical analysis, marriage ages have remained pretty steady.
00:42:48
Speaker
And most of the Western world, and even then, like women didn't typically have children to a little bit older.
00:42:53
Speaker
And part of that was because it was very, very common for women younger than not to die in childbirth because they weren't finished physically developing.
00:43:01
Speaker
And you have to also account for nutritional differences in centuries prior.
00:43:07
Speaker
So it took till about 1820, 18, 19, 20 for women to be like fully developed enough to safely carry children to term.
00:43:16
Speaker
Yeah.
00:43:17
Speaker
I also want to point out that the average age that women had their last child was apparently like 36, 37, 38.
00:43:24
Speaker
So like women, you got tons of time, like you can have kids well into your thirties and it'll be fine.
00:43:30
Speaker
Um, you know, this idea that like you have to rush and lock down a man by the time you're 13 years old is, you know, not, or by the time you're 18 years old is just not a fact.
00:43:41
Speaker
And it's a lie perpetuated by men to benefit men and to harm women.
00:43:47
Speaker
As a side note,
00:43:49
Speaker
When we're talking about breeding animals, like dogs, I have a relative who's a goat breeder, and a goat will usually have their first heat when they're around eight months or nine months old, but it is widely considered hugely unethical to allow a goat or a sheep to have its first pregnancy, to breed it at that age.
00:44:13
Speaker
You're not supposed to let a goat have a baby until it's about
00:44:18
Speaker
you're not supposed to let a goat have a kid until it's about two years old.
00:44:22
Speaker
That's when they're, you know, and if you let a goat have a baby when it's younger, it'll make them smaller in size and it'll actually like decrease their milk production over the course of their lifetime.
00:44:35
Speaker
So yeah, it's just like their physical body will be smaller that if they have a kid when they're younger, because the baby will take away nutrients from the mom and she'll have a smaller like skeleton and over
00:44:47
Speaker
Yeah, let them grow up and be adults, skirts.
00:45:04
Speaker
Yeah, like, let women grow up and be fully developed adults before having kids, like... Or before, like, grown adult men start to put their very grown adult sexuality on them, right?
00:45:16
Speaker
Impose that upon them.
00:45:18
Speaker
Which is usually some porn-sick bullshit.
00:45:20
Speaker
I just want to say, I think it's fucked up that, like, we treat animals better than humans a lot of the time, right?
00:45:24
Speaker
We treat animals better than women a lot of the time.
00:45:27
Speaker
Yeah.
00:45:27
Speaker
AOC said something to that effect, because she was talking about maternity leave and how, uh, for...
00:45:34
Speaker
But female dogs, you're supposed to give them eight weeks rest and not let the puppies be away from them for at least eight weeks.
00:45:42
Speaker
And then in the United States, we don't even have mandatory eight-week maternity leave.
00:45:47
Speaker
And so we don't even have maternity leave as a standard of however long it takes for them.
00:45:52
Speaker
human babies.
00:45:54
Speaker
And also, let's not forget that men are fully aware of the economic, physical, social impact having a baby will have on a woman.
00:46:06
Speaker
This whole concept of our baby trapping is just projection because if
00:46:12
Speaker
a man has a baby with a woman, he knows that she stands more to lose.
00:46:16
Speaker
There's a lot less social stigma if he's a deadbeat dad or if he walks away or if he doesn't provide than it is for her.
00:46:24
Speaker
So a lot of these, especially younger women, when I see an age gap relationship when they start having kids when she's really young, it just speaks to me of baby trapping.
00:46:34
Speaker
Yeah, like the whole idea that women are baby trapping men is a lie.
00:46:37
Speaker
It's projection.
00:46:38
Speaker
And also because he knows that when she has a kid, she'll be a lot less likely to leave because she's going to be more dependent, especially if she's in a country where being a single mom is frowned upon or if the welfare system isn't very robust.
00:46:51
Speaker
She's got very few options.
00:46:53
Speaker
The fact that in countries where gender inequality is much more extreme, that that's when age gap marriages tend to happen.
00:47:02
Speaker
compared to more developed countries where women have rights, that's when women choose to marry men who are around the same age as them.
00:47:10
Speaker
It's just like statistical proof that age gap relationships are not beneficial to women and that marrying someone around the same age as you is maximally beneficial.
00:47:21
Speaker
Yeah, the lie men keep telling themselves that women are naturally sexually attracted to much older men and that they're more distinguished at a certain age and women are just quote unquote old.
00:47:29
Speaker
It's just bullshit because when women are given a choice, you can see the choices that we make, right?
00:47:33
Speaker
And it's not choosing like old saggy bald skirts.
00:47:36
Speaker
Like let's talk about some of the more, let's talk about some more myths about age gap relationships.
00:47:42
Speaker
Yeah, this idea that women are just naturally drawn to older women.
00:47:45
Speaker
I
00:47:46
Speaker
I'm going to tell you, I have never seen a hot 50-year-old man.
00:47:50
Speaker
Even Brad Pitt is struggling right now.
00:47:52
Speaker
And Brad Pitt had a good like 30 year run of being completely dreamy fuckable.
00:47:59
Speaker
And he hit his like mid fifties and he just looks like an older man now.
00:48:05
Speaker
So I keep, I, I, I fail to see this logic that men keep perpetuating that like they're going to hit their sexual prime and be more desirable to younger women when they're forties and fifties.
00:48:16
Speaker
And I'm like, maybe slightly younger women, meaning like you're not, they're not gonna be able to materially tell, but it definitely seems like even,
00:48:23
Speaker
Even traditionally, classically handsome men who would have been handsome even in their 20s, once they get to their 40s and 50s, like everybody, they start to age and they just are less sexually attractive to younger people.
00:48:37
Speaker
And they seem to be in flat-out denial about this.
00:48:40
Speaker
Yeah.
00:48:41
Speaker
Yeah, there's the manosphere cope that women are depreciating goods and men age like fine wine.
00:48:48
Speaker
I remember seeing this video, I think it was Richard Cooper, that like entrepreneur guy, entrepreneurs and cars guy or whatever the fuck his name is.
00:48:55
Speaker
Oh, lightbulb head.
00:48:56
Speaker
Lightbulb head.
00:48:57
Speaker
Yeah, that guy who looks like...
00:49:00
Speaker
You know that look that guys get when they start to go bald, so they just grow out their beard and shave their head as a way of trying to hide the fact that they would have looked like Mr. Clean?
00:49:09
Speaker
Anyways, so he has this one video talking about sexual marketplace value, and he has this graph where he's like, women peak at 20, and men peak at 40, and that's why 40-year-old men should date 20-year-old women.
00:49:24
Speaker
He says this as a 40-year-old man, and I'm like, oh!
00:49:27
Speaker
And they justify this because of the fact that men on dating sites are more likely to swipe right on 20-year-old women than women are more likely to swipe right on 20-year-old men.
00:49:37
Speaker
And I'm like, all that shows is that men are delusional.
00:49:39
Speaker
Yeah, right?
00:49:40
Speaker
Like, way more likely to be delusional.
00:49:42
Speaker
That does not mean – like, guys will have a whole ass graph behind him that, like, could be retitled, like, why I'm a pedophile or, like, justifying why I'm a pedophile.
00:49:51
Speaker
And they're –
00:49:53
Speaker
Like, I want to take a screenshot of that video and like have the title be like, justifying why I'm a pedophile or something like that.
00:50:00
Speaker
And it's like, that's not the flex on.
00:50:03
Speaker
And also there is a difference between finding somebody or acknowledging that somebody is attractive and actually wanting to have sex and date with them.
00:50:11
Speaker
Like, you know, I've seen, you know, guys in their 50s who are thinking, you know, wow, they look really good.
00:50:16
Speaker
But that's very different to me wanting to shag them.
00:50:21
Speaker
Like, I don't know why men can't tell the difference.
00:50:23
Speaker
LAUGHTER
00:50:25
Speaker
Yeah, I don't want to deal with erectile dysfunction.
00:50:27
Speaker
Yeah, let's not even skip past that because that's actually a big thing.
00:50:31
Speaker
And I think even Rallo himself or whatever that guy's name is, or no, Richard Cooper, he's been on testosterone replacement therapy.
00:50:39
Speaker
Yeah, like all these old guys have to take fucking testosterone and Viagra.
00:50:43
Speaker
Because their peens stop working or at least don't work as well.
00:50:45
Speaker
And it's usually okay because women, as they get older, also desire sex less.
00:50:51
Speaker
But...
00:50:52
Speaker
It's like they don't want to just like accept that natural aging process.
00:50:55
Speaker
They want to like just cling on to this youth and delusion that they're going to keep being just as virile and sexually attractive to younger women as they were when they were younger.
00:51:06
Speaker
And I'm like, even athletes, I mean, why don't professional athletes play to their 50s, man?
00:51:10
Speaker
Like most of them tap out around 35.
00:51:11
Speaker
It's just one of those things where we all age.
00:51:15
Speaker
They just need to get the fuck over it.
00:51:17
Speaker
Just like realize that that all this justifying and mental gymnastics about like why they're the more desirable sex after certain age is just is just cope.
Building Healthy Relationships
00:51:28
Speaker
Yeah.
00:51:28
Speaker
I mean, here's the thing.
00:51:29
Speaker
Like if you're a lot of younger guys and I noticed this a lot online, especially like I used to get DMS on Reddit all the time saying, you know.
00:51:38
Speaker
I might be ugly now, but like, just you wait until I'm 40 and I have my own business and all these women will be like surrounding me or whatever.
00:51:45
Speaker
And you're going to be like a bitter old hag.
00:51:47
Speaker
And, and I'm just like reading this, like, mate, if you can't get women when you're in your twenties, it's not going to get better.
00:51:53
Speaker
Bing, bing, bing.
00:51:55
Speaker
And that's what I mean about it being cope, right?
00:51:57
Speaker
Like,
00:51:57
Speaker
Like, if you're attractive in your 20s and you really take care of yourself, then maybe, yeah, you can still pull some tail when you're in your 40s.
00:52:04
Speaker
But, like, no, if you're an ugly incel that no one wants when you're in your 20s, like, what makes you think you're going to be more attractive when you're 40, okay?
00:52:13
Speaker
Like, first of all, 90% of these guys will never be that successful.
00:52:16
Speaker
Yeah, that too.
00:52:17
Speaker
Like, for me to be attracted, for me to...
00:52:20
Speaker
even breathe the same air as a 40 year old man he has to have a fuck ton of money like for me to even get out of bed he needs to be like a millionaire i'm not even kidding um but even then like if he didn't have the money i wouldn't be around him right so um but let's talk about like let's talk let's talk about money in a bit but sorry savannah you had something to say no i'm sorry i was just giggling but continue
00:52:45
Speaker
I feel bad for those guys because this is where I feel like the red pill manosphere, the whole thing, like actually leads men astray who maybe aren't even like horrible dudes, but like just legit struggle with women.
00:52:58
Speaker
And then the red pill fills their head with a bunch of stupidity.
00:53:01
Speaker
And all that's going to do is like leave them probably assed out in middle age.
00:53:06
Speaker
Yeah, imagine how sad.
00:53:08
Speaker
I'm like actually sad for them because they're going to live there.
00:53:11
Speaker
They're going to throw away their entire 20s and 30s.
00:53:14
Speaker
You know, even if they get super wealthy, like I've met my fair share of men who are in their 30s and 40s who are late bloomers who have no social skills and no relationship skills because they've dedicated their entire lives to...
00:53:27
Speaker
you know, becoming a really great engineer or something like that, or, you know, making money.
00:53:33
Speaker
And yeah, like maybe you're really good at your job and you make lots of money, but like you're an absolute bore and absolutely miserable to be around because you just don't have any social skills, right?
00:53:43
Speaker
I've seen these guys too.
00:53:44
Speaker
And it's like, I mean, I've worked with these guys, quite frankly, guys who are like, they've never married.
00:53:48
Speaker
They're very, very financially successful, but whatever.
00:53:52
Speaker
There's just one thing about them that's just a bit off putting to women and no amount of money can compensate for it because they haven't.
00:53:59
Speaker
And they haven't addressed that issue, right?
00:54:01
Speaker
Rather than like thinking, well, I'm successful now, so all the women should be sucking my dick.
00:54:05
Speaker
And it's like, well, no, you still have to build some kind of sexual attraction to all but the most aggressive of gold diggers, right?
00:54:13
Speaker
Yeah, like the most like the women who have the ability to just like turn off any sense of like disgust, like the women who are like the best actors, right?
00:54:21
Speaker
right right oscar-winning actresses who could that's what gold diggers are exactly like only the best actresses the most aggressive gold diggers would go for them and then they have the audacity to complain about gold diggers like men will these kinds of men will like work their whole lives to become super rich thinking that once they're rich that women will be falling all over them but then they hate those women who want men who are rich and
00:54:46
Speaker
Yeah, and I'm like, that's your pool, though.
00:54:48
Speaker
That's your dating pool that you've created for yourself, right?
00:54:51
Speaker
So, like, if the Red Pill was giving good advice to men, what they would be telling them is, you're going to be most attractive when you're in your 20s and 30s.
00:55:01
Speaker
And so that's why you need to, like, lose the weight, be attractive to women, style your hair, dress like an adult, make money.
00:55:08
Speaker
Yeah, like, focus on your career and personal development as well.
00:55:13
Speaker
But also, like,
00:55:14
Speaker
they should be in their, in their twenties and thirties, like making an effort to.
00:55:19
Speaker
Cultivating community, cultivating friends.
00:55:21
Speaker
Cultivating community and relationships with women.
00:55:24
Speaker
Not always sexual, sexual either.
00:55:26
Speaker
Like.
00:55:26
Speaker
Yeah.
00:55:27
Speaker
Yeah.
00:55:27
Speaker
Yeah.
00:55:27
Speaker
Friendships, you know, like genuine friendships.
00:55:30
Speaker
And I'm not one of those people that thinks like men and women can't be friends.
00:55:35
Speaker
I think there's limits to it.
00:55:36
Speaker
Like you have to have boundaries, but like you do need to cultivate some kind of co-ed experience.
00:55:41
Speaker
friendship, right?
00:55:42
Speaker
Like the ability to talk to women and have it not be sexual, right?
00:55:47
Speaker
Yeah.
00:55:47
Speaker
Ability to talk to women and see women as like people, like a lot of these guys who, how do I say this?
00:55:54
Speaker
Like this myth that men are more desirable in their forties actually harms men because they waste their twenties and thirties, not building their people skills.
00:56:03
Speaker
And then they end up their forties.
00:56:04
Speaker
And then this promise that they've been given by the red pill ends up not materializing.
00:56:08
Speaker
Like, you know how old guys are creepy and entitled now?
00:56:11
Speaker
Imagine how fucking bad it's going to be in 10 or 20 years when all these, like, incel guys.
00:56:15
Speaker
I know.
00:56:16
Speaker
Like, all these guys raised on incel, red pill ideology in 10, 20 years are going to be unbearable.
00:56:22
Speaker
I genuinely think they're all going to be terrorists.
00:56:24
Speaker
Yeah, it's scary, actually.
00:56:26
Speaker
Because this promise that they've been fed that, like,
00:56:28
Speaker
yeah, supermodels are going to be jumping all over you by the time you're 40 and have money.
00:56:32
Speaker
And when that doesn't happen and their expectations are not met... When they just see tumbleweeds.
00:56:39
Speaker
And upward mobility is harder than ever.
00:56:41
Speaker
So this isn't even like our parents' generation where you could walk out of high school and get a nice, solid middle-class job.
00:56:48
Speaker
It's competitive out here.
00:56:49
Speaker
So there's just going to be a sizable percentage of men who miss out.
00:56:53
Speaker
Yeah.
00:56:54
Speaker
A lot of these guys will never be that successful.
00:56:56
Speaker
And even the ones that...
00:56:57
Speaker
do end up being that successful, their personalities are going to be so repulsive that, yeah, they're only going to attract the most ruthless gold diggers.
00:57:10
Speaker
But let's talk about money, because that's another myth that I think a lot of younger women, when they are drawn to older men, it's because they...
00:57:18
Speaker
think, well, older men have more money.
00:57:20
Speaker
And it's partially true in the sense that, yeah, like younger men are less stable in their career and they tend to have less money.
00:57:28
Speaker
See, okay, this might not be like the best FDS advice, but I will say like, if you are going to date an older man for money, you have to go into it with this sort of ruthless pragmatism where you pretty much like don't even see him as a person and only as a wallet.
00:57:42
Speaker
I'm dead serious.
00:57:43
Speaker
Like you...
00:57:44
Speaker
That if you are in a situation where your economic solvency is dependent on men, we always advocate that as much as possible, women try to be financially independent.
00:57:55
Speaker
But, you know, there's a lot of people in a lot of different countries and we know that some places are really desperate.
00:58:00
Speaker
Or if you're just like, just say, like, I'm really, really, really destitute.
00:58:04
Speaker
And I think that trying to...
00:58:08
Speaker
get in a relationship where I can be taken care of at least temporarily might benefit me.
00:58:12
Speaker
Like have a ruthless ass mindset about it.
00:58:15
Speaker
We don't really do the gold digger stuff explicitly, but there's, there's, there's plenty of information out there about it.
00:58:20
Speaker
But I mean, a lot of them will just tell you that these guys, um, you have to set boundaries.
00:58:25
Speaker
You have to like go in knowing what it is.
00:58:29
Speaker
Don't, um, kid yourself that these men are good people.
00:58:33
Speaker
Don't kid yourself that these men are good people, okay?
00:58:35
Speaker
Understand that they're using you and that you're entitled to use them back.
00:58:39
Speaker
They see you as an object, right?
00:58:40
Speaker
So, like, they see you as a sexual object, therefore, you're entitled to see them as a financial object.
00:58:46
Speaker
That's just fair.
00:58:47
Speaker
It reminds me of that 90 Day Fiance scene where Jorge, like, is like, oh my gosh, I can't believe Anfisa, you know, you only want me to buy you stuff.
00:58:57
Speaker
He's like...
00:58:58
Speaker
She's like, but I like stuff.
00:59:00
Speaker
And he's like, well, what if I wasn't able to buy stuff?
00:59:02
Speaker
She's like, I wouldn't be sitting here with you right now.
00:59:05
Speaker
And he's like, oh, so you're just saying that, you know, you only care about me because I provide for you.
00:59:09
Speaker
And she's like, would you be sitting here if I was fat and ugly?
00:59:12
Speaker
Exactly.
00:59:13
Speaker
And it's like, yeah, like if he's using you for your looks, you're allowed to use him for money.
00:59:18
Speaker
That's just that's equality.
00:59:19
Speaker
That's fairness.
00:59:20
Speaker
OK, right.
00:59:21
Speaker
Because the thing is, because the implication is there, like usually if you're dealing with a man who has money, you have to deal with a man you're not actually sexually attracted to.
00:59:27
Speaker
So it's work.
00:59:28
Speaker
right?
00:59:28
Speaker
Yeah.
00:59:28
Speaker
It is work.
00:59:29
Speaker
Exactly.
00:59:30
Speaker
So it's work.
00:59:31
Speaker
It's, it's probably, and this is like, uh, and this is why we're kind of like anti the idea of like sex work being normalized because it normalizes the idea that women owe men sexual labor that we're not attracted to.
00:59:43
Speaker
But we also understand that sometimes women are just in fucked up circumstances and you just, you don't have, you're out of options.
00:59:49
Speaker
Right.
00:59:49
Speaker
Um, here's the thing.
00:59:50
Speaker
If you're a woman who's born in a European, you know, or Canada or U S or Australia, New Zealand, like a developed country, um,
00:59:58
Speaker
and you have educational options, a better strategy rather than dating old men when you're in your 20s for money, I would recommend focusing on your education, leveling up so that you earn your own money.
01:00:10
Speaker
Because marrying a rich man when you're in your 20s, first of all, like,
01:00:15
Speaker
Marrying older men for money, you're going to age out of it.
01:00:17
Speaker
That's just a fact.
01:00:17
Speaker
And it may not work because a lot of them are very, very protective of their assets and like try to hide money, et cetera, et cetera.
01:00:24
Speaker
You may end up destitute anyways.
01:00:25
Speaker
Exactly.
01:00:26
Speaker
So like don't rely on like divorce raping a guy because that's no guarantee.
01:00:29
Speaker
They'll either hide their money or like a lot of them, first of all, are not even as rich as they say.
01:00:35
Speaker
Like, that's the other thing to keep in mind.
01:00:37
Speaker
A lot of these guys are like Splendidaddies and they'll like... Okay, how do I say this in a way that's good?
01:00:44
Speaker
Like, a lot of these guys like to flaunt wealth that they don't have.
01:00:47
Speaker
And so what you gotta do is like, get your bag and go, basically.
01:00:51
Speaker
Like, don't hitch yourself to these men.
01:00:53
Speaker
Like, don't marry them.
01:00:55
Speaker
Let them pay for your tuition while you're young.
01:00:57
Speaker
Let them spend money on you while you're young.
01:01:00
Speaker
But don't go into it thinking that this is a real romance or that you're going to have a lifelong commitment with this person.
01:01:06
Speaker
Be realistic about the fact that the relationship is probably going to end when you age out.
01:01:10
Speaker
And so you want to, like, make the most of your youth while you can.
01:01:13
Speaker
But here's the thing.
01:01:14
Speaker
Younger women are also less emotionally mature.
01:01:17
Speaker
I find younger women tend to not have that ruthless pragmatism that older men, that older women have, right?
01:01:22
Speaker
I think that's changing, though.
01:01:24
Speaker
I mean, that's the only thing with sugar daddy culture, etc., etc., is like they're comparing notes and getting more about that.
01:01:31
Speaker
But it's just, it's in general, like educate yourself, go into this with a ruthless pragmatist mindset.
01:01:38
Speaker
And get your bag and go.
01:01:39
Speaker
But it's always better not to do it.
01:01:41
Speaker
And that's our official FDS position.
01:01:43
Speaker
And it's like these various forms of sex works, it relies on rape culture and men exploiting poor women, right?
01:01:51
Speaker
So it's just as a general rule, it's a bad idea.
01:01:55
Speaker
Like we don't think society should support that.
01:01:57
Speaker
They should never make an economy out of like exploiting women sexually, poor women especially.
01:02:04
Speaker
So I'd say ideal, like from FDS perspective, ideal thing is like you spend your 20s making as much money as you or, you know, focusing on your education so that when you're older, you can be financially self-reliant.
01:02:15
Speaker
And dating the men you want to have sex with, right?
01:02:17
Speaker
And not like the men you need to have sex with because they have something you need, right?
01:02:22
Speaker
Exactly.
01:02:23
Speaker
But we understand that there are some women where maybe they're from countries where those educational opportunities are not afforded to women.
01:02:30
Speaker
Or we understand that there are some women who, because of the circumstances of their life, are forced to rely on this or feel that that's the best option for them.
01:02:41
Speaker
And so if you're a woman who's going to go into that, it's not recommended.
01:02:44
Speaker
But if you do...
01:02:46
Speaker
You have to go into it and be ruthless pragmatist about it.
01:02:49
Speaker
Don't kid yourself.
01:02:50
Speaker
Like this is some kind of fairytale romance.
01:02:53
Speaker
It's purely transactional.
01:02:54
Speaker
Yeah.
01:02:55
Speaker
What's the other myth is that older men are better at sex.
01:02:58
Speaker
And I can say without a doubt, they're not.
01:03:00
Speaker
Lies!
01:03:01
Speaker
Lies!
01:03:03
Speaker
Stop these fucking lies.
01:03:05
Speaker
The problem with younger men, though, is like they've all been raised on porn and do this like weird jackhammer shit.
01:03:10
Speaker
So older guys, their only advantage is they haven't been raised on porn.
01:03:14
Speaker
But they're catching up, to be blunt.
01:03:15
Speaker
They're catching up.
01:03:17
Speaker
Older men are just as sexually selfish as men of any age demographic.
01:03:21
Speaker
Yeah.
01:03:22
Speaker
So you have to find a guy who, regardless of age, is, but usually younger, who is generous.
01:03:28
Speaker
Yeah.
01:03:28
Speaker
Then you're dealing with older men, you're dealing with general entitlement that sex is a performance for them.
01:03:33
Speaker
Meaning like a general entitlement that sex is like your duty as a woman, right?
01:03:37
Speaker
Yeah, wifely duties.
01:03:39
Speaker
They expect you to lie back and think of England.
01:03:40
Speaker
They come with a different type of energy.
01:03:42
Speaker
And they've had more practice of being shit in bed as well.
01:03:45
Speaker
So that's another thing.
01:03:47
Speaker
And they just get lazy.
01:03:48
Speaker
Like they're set in their ways, right?
01:03:49
Speaker
Because they could have just been that they've done a lot of things and like now they're like, oh, I don't, you know, I'm not interested in being any way different sexually.
01:03:57
Speaker
Sometimes they just get into a rut or a groove and then that's the only way they can get off anymore.
01:04:02
Speaker
There's also the stereotype like men who are more sexually experienced are better at sex, like men who have a higher body count are better at sex, which is also a total myth.
01:04:11
Speaker
I find like guys who pump and dump a lot of women are the worst lovers.
01:04:15
Speaker
So if a guy sleeps around a lot, usually it's because he's like, you know, they're just they're either like if he sleeps around a lot, he's probably just like.
01:04:25
Speaker
more physically attractive or more manipulative more manipulative that was my thing he may not even be more because i've seen guys that are super average but they're like really good um at bullshitting and sweet talking women so they're doing it for the thrill of the chase and the sex is just a way for them to quote unquote win and it's not actually an experience they desire to share with a woman they just need it to feed their own ego and
01:04:47
Speaker
Yeah, like, these pickup artist types, like, have you seen how some of them talk about sex?
01:04:51
Speaker
They'll be like, the way that they talk about the act of sex, they're like, it's you just putting your engorged penis into her moist hole.
01:04:59
Speaker
Like, they see it from a purely mechanical perspective, and they see it as, like, their...
01:05:05
Speaker
Yeah.
01:05:20
Speaker
Yeah.
01:05:21
Speaker
I mean, they're just high pressure sales assholes that like, usually, usually what I find is that they, they just, um, they like virtue signal certain things with women or they love bomb or they promise them things and then lead women to believe that they're making a connection and then just flip the script and be like, ha ha.
01:05:39
Speaker
You know, it's basically like just materially and deliberately, um,
01:05:43
Speaker
Haha, I tricked you.
01:05:44
Speaker
Yeah, misleading women to have sex with them.
01:05:46
Speaker
Because most women take people at face value.
01:05:50
Speaker
So a lot of times these type of guys, they figure out a certain set of things to say or do that are more likely to have women have sex with them.
01:05:58
Speaker
But none of it's true, right?
Financial Roles and Household Dynamics
01:06:00
Speaker
So it's just a way for them to present and sell you a lemon car, right?
01:06:05
Speaker
Yeah.
01:06:06
Speaker
Like, sell you a sell.
01:06:07
Speaker
Yeah.
01:06:08
Speaker
Like, they, you know, they're trying to act like they're a Ferrari, but they're actually a lemon.
01:06:12
Speaker
Like, it's not the age that's important.
01:06:14
Speaker
It's their attitude towards sex.
01:06:15
Speaker
And if they are eager to please or eager to learn, that's more important.
01:06:19
Speaker
Anyways, Savannah, do you have anything to add?
01:06:23
Speaker
No, it's just because I've never dated, had like an age gap relationship before.
01:06:27
Speaker
Oh, okay.
01:06:28
Speaker
Yeah, my parents are seven years apart and they're
01:06:31
Speaker
really normal.
01:06:32
Speaker
Like, they're not weird.
01:06:33
Speaker
Like, if anything, my mum holds the power purse.
01:06:37
Speaker
I like those kinds of relationships, actually.
01:06:39
Speaker
I've seen...
01:06:41
Speaker
My dad's second wife, for example.
01:06:44
Speaker
Yeah, honestly, I really admire that power reversal.
01:06:47
Speaker
That's how a lot of like working class people do it.
01:06:50
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, and that's another that's a whole other discussion.
01:06:53
Speaker
I think we maybe we should do FDS on like household finance management.
01:06:56
Speaker
But like a lot of a lot of working class couples like divide labor that way.
01:07:02
Speaker
And I can say that was the truth for my grandparents as well.
01:07:04
Speaker
Like my grandpa just brought his paycheck home and gave it to my grandma.
01:07:07
Speaker
And she did all the household money management because she knew what to do, right?
01:07:11
Speaker
And she knew how to distribute it to everybody.
01:07:13
Speaker
And like he didn't want to have to manage any of that, right?
01:07:15
Speaker
Because like their kids needed things and then like relatives needed things.
01:07:18
Speaker
So he would just give her the money and be like, okay, take care of everybody, you know?
01:07:21
Speaker
Yeah.
01:07:23
Speaker
Yeah.
01:07:23
Speaker
I think those kinds of marriages, the relationships with men that I've had that were good were when their parents had that dynamic where the man just like brought home a paycheck, gave it to the wife and the wife had a level head and knew how to distribute that money in an efficient way.
01:07:42
Speaker
And yeah, I think that just makes sense because like when women control money, they spend it on their children and on things for the household.
01:07:49
Speaker
When men control money, they spend it on like prostitutes and drugs and alcohol.
01:07:53
Speaker
Okay.
01:07:54
Speaker
Basically.
01:07:54
Speaker
Yeah.
01:07:55
Speaker
Gambling, liquor.
01:07:56
Speaker
Yeah.
01:07:57
Speaker
I want to just wrap up actually with, I have like a conspiracy theory actually.
01:08:02
Speaker
I think that this push to normalize age gap relationships is actually like a backlash to women's rights.
01:08:08
Speaker
I had a tweet about this a while ago that blew up and a ton of guys got triggered over it.
01:08:13
Speaker
And they're like, no, like this isn't a recent thing.
01:08:15
Speaker
Men have always been pedophiles kind of thing.
01:08:18
Speaker
But no, seriously, I think this like growing push to normalize age gap relationships is a way of...
01:08:23
Speaker
you know, forcing women to be, or kind of like grooming women to be sexually reliant or subservient to men when we're young.
01:08:32
Speaker
Cause the younger you get, and fucking red pillars will straight up admit it.
01:08:35
Speaker
They'll say like women over 30 are undateable because you can't mold them to be your perfect woman.
01:08:40
Speaker
They will straight up say that the reason why they go after 18 year old women is that they can mold them and groom them and exploit them.
01:08:47
Speaker
Like they will say that that's what they want to do.
01:08:50
Speaker
And so I think that,
01:08:52
Speaker
And it's almost, like, weird that there's this life cycle where guys say, like, I don't want to date women my own age because they're all, like, bitter and jaded and traumatized and stuff.
01:08:59
Speaker
I want to be the one to take a young girl.
01:09:02
Speaker
And I want to be the one to traumatize her.
01:09:04
Speaker
Yeah, I want to be the one that ruins her life.
01:09:06
Speaker
Exactly.
01:09:06
Speaker
Like, so...
01:09:08
Speaker
You know, we need to fight back.
01:09:09
Speaker
I don't think most women are falling for it.
01:09:11
Speaker
That's what men are trying to do.
01:09:12
Speaker
And women are just like outsmarting them.
01:09:14
Speaker
You can see the TikTok generation right now is really fighting it.
01:09:17
Speaker
And that I feel like I've seen on Reddit, like guys like getting mad because there's so many girls on TikTok who treat guys who date, who try to date younger women as like pedophiles.
01:09:27
Speaker
And they're calling like, oh, why is Gen Z so puritanical?
01:09:30
Speaker
Because they can see the things you write and the things that you say publicly.
Gen Z's Critique of Age Gaps
01:09:34
Speaker
Yeah.
01:09:35
Speaker
Because we have eyes and we can read and we can see and read the things that you say publicly.
01:09:41
Speaker
So they're probably even more puritanical than I am because I remember like, I don't remember which celebrity couple it was, but one of them was 19 and the other one was 17.
01:09:49
Speaker
And they were like, this is predatory.
01:09:50
Speaker
This was like a whole like blow up on Twitter that was started on TikTok over like a two year age.
01:09:57
Speaker
Was it Millie Bobby Brown?
01:09:59
Speaker
Well, I don't know if it was her.
01:10:01
Speaker
There's been more questionable things with Millie Bobby Brown.
01:10:04
Speaker
I don't remember which relationship it was, but it was like 19 and 17.
01:10:07
Speaker
And 17, I think, is not age of consent in all states.
01:10:10
Speaker
18 in the United States is age of consent for some.
01:10:13
Speaker
So people were upset about this.
01:10:15
Speaker
But like...
01:10:17
Speaker
Usually we have like Romeo and Juliet laws, like if they're within two years or something like that, but I think they were just outside two years or something like that.
01:10:24
Speaker
And then like all of Gen Z, Twitter and Gen Z TikTok was like going off about it.
01:10:28
Speaker
And so like a lot of the...
01:10:31
Speaker
how some older feminists like going in on this as well as like men talking about how like oh gen z's puritanical and gen z like is hyperbolic in the way that they talk about sexual relationships and like trying to drag them for it but i'm like i feel like if anything women of that age because they can see your porn and they grew up on the internet they know what you're like and that's why there's sort of this like complete and total um
01:10:55
Speaker
like push to create a boundary, right?
01:10:57
Speaker
Like there's a complete total backlash against any type of perceived sexual imbalance there.
01:11:02
Speaker
Yeah.
01:11:03
Speaker
So, like, as much as I complain about the grooming that's been happening on TikTok, I'm, like, so proud of Gen Z women for fighting back on that.
01:11:09
Speaker
Hell yeah, they're not with it.
01:11:10
Speaker
Yeah, they're not with it.
01:11:12
Speaker
Yeah.
01:11:12
Speaker
From a bitter old millennial.
01:11:14
Speaker
Yeah.
01:11:15
Speaker
Kudos to you.
01:11:16
Speaker
Yeah, and so, and men love to drag us for our, like, child safeguarding stuff, and they're like, oh, you're just, like, bitter old hags because we want to rape children instead of you, and it's like, get fucked.
01:11:25
Speaker
Like, women have this natural protective instinct to other women, and I think that should be fostered,
Advice and Conclusion
01:11:32
Speaker
so...
01:11:32
Speaker
Yeah.
01:11:33
Speaker
Don't date older men.
01:11:34
Speaker
Date men around the same age as you.
01:11:36
Speaker
That's what's maximally beneficial to women.
01:11:37
Speaker
Peace out.
01:11:38
Speaker
Please check out our Twitter at fem.strat as well as our Patreon, patreon.com forward slash the female dating strategy.
01:11:45
Speaker
And you can check out our weekly bonus content.
01:11:48
Speaker
We usually discuss a lot of pop culture stuff.
01:11:50
Speaker
So I think it's pretty good.
01:11:51
Speaker
Check it out.
01:11:52
Speaker
Also check out our website, the female dating strategy.com.
01:11:55
Speaker
Thanks for listening, queens.
01:11:56
Speaker
And for all you creepy old age gap apologists, die mad.
01:12:02
Speaker
you