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Wintering, Releasing & Becoming | A Cozy, Soulful Conversation with Friends
0 Playsin 4 minutes
In this special, impromptu episode of the Beyond Esthetics Podcast, we’re joined by two incredible voices from our community, Marti Hutchinson and Gabby Gaione, for an honest, heart-centered conversation rooted in connection, reflection, and collaboration.
Together, we explore what it truly means to winter well — slowing down, softening, and honoring the natural cycles of life and business during the colder months. We share the meaningful gifts we’re giving our loved ones this season, how we’re navigating the holidays with intention, and what we’re personally and professionally releasing as we close out 2025, a powerful Year of the Snake and a collective 9 year of completion and shedding.
We also dive into authenticity of what it looks like to show up as we are, let go of perfection, and allow our real stories to be part of our leadership. This episode is a reminder that growth doesn’t have to happen alone. In fact, some of the most profound expansion happens in community.
This conversation beautifully reflects one of our core values at Beyond Esthetics: community over competition. Collaboration, shared wisdom, and honest dialogue don’t dilute our voices, they amplify them.
Whether you’re reflecting, releasing, or setting intentions for the year ahead, this episode invites you to slow down, tune inward, and remember the power of doing this work together.
Find Us:
Instagram: @thebeyondesthetics @sweetcheeksuniversity @the_esthi_coach
Tik Tok: @beyondesthetics7 @sweetcheeksuniversity @jessguidesesthies
Email: hello@beyondestheticscoaching.com
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Transcript
Introduction to Beyond Aesthetics Podcast
00:00:03
Speaker
Welcome to the beyond aesthetics podcast, the podcast, where we dive deep into the journey of aestheticians who aspire to grow, not just professionally, but personally and spiritually. This is a space where the art of aesthetics meets the soul and the power of community fuels transformation.
00:00:19
Speaker
Whether you're looking to elevate your skills, expand your mindset, or align your career with your deeper purpose, you are in the right place.
Elevating Skills and Mindsets
00:00:27
Speaker
Join us as we explore stories, strategies, and insights that go beyond the surface because growth happens from the inside out. This is Beyond Aesthetics. Let's grow together.
Introduction of Guests: Marty and Gabby
00:00:38
Speaker
And I am one of your hosts, Tiffany Orr, this is my beautiful co-host. Go ahead. I am Jessica Peterson, and we are joined today by some very willing, impromptu friends. Hello.
00:00:54
Speaker
Because we this morning had our mastermind scheduled and doing that the week of Christmas, I definitely should have thought about that, but I didn't. And i just, you know, so we have ended up with two people here who are also willing to let us just hit record. Yeah. So that we can record an episode. um And we're really excited. So today we are joined by our returning guest and dear friend, Marty Hutchinson and Gabby from Virginia. So I'm actually going to give each of you just a couple of minutes to do just a quick intro where you're from.
00:01:35
Speaker
um Marty, you've been on before, but just in case anyone didn't listen to that episode. So whatever you guys want to say to just give a quick intro, I'll just turn that over to you.
Marty's Experience and Passion
00:01:45
Speaker
Okay, well, my name is Marty Hutchinson and I am an esthetician. I own a med spa and then an academy where we teach advanced aesthetics.
00:01:56
Speaker
And then I have the med spa mentor app. So teaching is really my passion, people connecting, um, all that. And how long have you been an esthetician?
00:02:07
Speaker
This is my 19th year. So it was a second career for me. So I started when I was 30. So I'm going to be 50 this year and it's been an amazing ride.
00:02:20
Speaker
I love it. Love it. We're so grateful that this worked out and that you hopped on this morning so that we can do this with you. so thank you for that. And then Gabby, take it away. Okay, um I'm Gabby and I have Elevated Aesthetics in Virginia Beach, Virginia. i am an master esthetician and spray tan artist and I found Tiffany and Jess through their Beyond Aesthetics podcast earlier this year and slid into Jess's DMs and was like, hey,
00:02:55
Speaker
ah I want I just want to get together. Like I want to get on your coaching calls. Like what does it consist of? And it's been a huge blessing for my business and just releasing the things that don't serve you.
00:03:10
Speaker
i mean, like from your workbooks and everything that you provided me with to get started with you was really amazing. And I'll have it forever. You have your own little file and folder in my phone. Yeah. That's like, okay, what do I need to revisit again? Like, what are my content pillars? And like, when I'm sharing my core values and things with people, it just feels good. And it's a very intentional way to, i don't know, bring everything that you want in your business to come together and how you're attracting your, you know, ideal clients.
00:03:49
Speaker
I love that so much. We're so grateful to have CrossPaths with you because so much is so much has happened for you this year. We were just kind of talking about that. Yeah. Lots.
00:04:00
Speaker
Yeah. Lots of shedding, but good shedding. yeah Good. Well, we can't wait to get into that. So I thought we could start off with just kind of a fun question.
Red Light Therapy Insights
00:04:10
Speaker
i would love to know from each of you your favorite gift that you are giving this year or that you have already given this year to a loved one.
00:04:19
Speaker
o well, I know. um I'm so excited. My daughter asked for red light therapy for her horse. wow And I'm like, this is right up my alley. i can do this. It's going to cost so much for a horse.
00:04:38
Speaker
Um, that's going to be like her big gift this year is red light therapy boots for her horse. my Oh, That I'm like, wow, I love Cause I've been trying to get her into, you know, like, what you want to do with your life? She's 17. And I'm like, you could do something in the wellness healing space with horses. And, um, so when she asked for those, I was like, uh, yeah, that's getting you. Right. Does she know, or is it going to be a surprise? It's going to be a surprise. Cause when I saw the price tag, I was like, I am not spending that. Absolutely not.
00:05:15
Speaker
So she's going to be like, she's going floored. Like so yeah so surprised. because's not expecting it. Those are the best gifts to give when they aren't going to expect it No, I can't wait. Did you have a hard time like sourcing that gift? I've never even heard of red light therapy for horses or animals, but it makes sense.
00:05:34
Speaker
and This lady that we actually bought a horse from in California, she posted that she started a red light therapy business and she sold products. And I was like, okay, this is my sign. yeah This was after I said no, she posted that.
00:05:50
Speaker
And so then I reached out to her and I was like, perfect. I'll also, I get to support her business because she's so supportive of my daughter and I get to give such an amazing gift. So.
00:06:01
Speaker
It's like giving two gifts. I know. Two big gifts. Oh, that is so cool. I love that. That's exciting. I can't wait to hear how that goes. you guys The coolest part, i was talking to the vet and he said, I'm like, why does, you know, red light is such a big deal in the animal world.
00:06:19
Speaker
and the horse world, but it's not, you know, it's just becoming such a big deal for us. And I was asking the vet why? And he said, because it works so well for animals because they don't have, they're not thinking it won't work.
00:06:35
Speaker
They don't think that it won't work. They don't think that they're not going to heal their, their mind isn't telling them that this might be a gimmick. It just works because it works.
00:06:48
Speaker
Because they don't have like the, the ego and the everything that like the human brain has to contend with. They don't have these limiting beliefs that are telling them not going to work.
00:06:59
Speaker
Oh, that's huge. Isn't that wild? h Also like just kind of so cool that this, like we're going into the year of the horse and just all of these things like this is such a gateway, I think, into what we're going to talk about. just wanted to add that. Yeah. That's so cool. i love it. Yeah.
00:07:19
Speaker
That's incredible. Yeah. What about you, Gabby? I definitely can't top that. Um, that is, that is the ultimate gift. Okay. That's so cool. And hopefully you guys have similar shoe sizes and you can hop on the horse and and like get to wear that and like be a part of it.
00:07:38
Speaker
Um, a lot of my gifts this year, I was, our families aren't going like big, expensive, not anything like that. Um, was really just trying to think of what people love, you know, like really like practical and functional gifts. um But we did have like my mother-in-law's um dog pass this year and I made her a gift, I guess. I bought some like glasses basically. therere
00:08:10
Speaker
They look like beer cans, if you will. So like wide mouth. Mm-hmm. And I just printed off a bunch of pictures of iPod and Mod Podged it on these glasses, like water drinking glasses with the dishwasher safe Mod Podge. And that just like felt good making because she is so chill and low key. And i think it's more sentimental than any, you know, gift that you might buy from Amazon or something would be. So that just felt really good giving this year. I'm excited to give it to her on Christmas day, but yeah, I think it's more of like really thinking of what people could use or already love, you know? Yeah. Yeah, definitely.
00:08:58
Speaker
Tiff, what is yours? Um, I think mine this year is I got my sister-in-law some coffee table books. Like I got her a Chanel one and a Ralph Lauren one. And then this like big, beautiful, like, and it's kind of like a home decor one, but they're like big ones and they're so pretty. And I'm really excited to give those. She's going to love them.
00:09:19
Speaker
Are we talking about China? Yes. Yeah. That's yeah perfect for her. How fun. That's so cute. My favorite gift is what I gave Tiffany actually. already knew the answer. So I love gifts that when you see it, you're just like, I can't not do this. I can't not buy this for this person. Like those are always the best ones. And it's this super poofy oversized leopard Yeah.
00:09:46
Speaker
It's so me. it' so I was like, oh my gosh, I sent it to her immediately. So it definitely wasn't a surprise because I was like, ah you have to have this. And you know we had to talk about the sizing and stuff. But I just love i love gifts in general. The other gift I'm really excited about this year is my niece, Penny. She'll be four in March. And I found on Amazon pink sparkly cowgirl boots. Yeah. And they're like big sparkly. Like they are so in your face a sparkly because she wears around these red ruby slippers that my other sister had gotten her every single day. And they're so worn out. And now it's winter. so I was like, well, what is she going to do now that she can't wear her ruby slippers? And so I found pink sparkly cowboy boots, but those are just my favorite kind of gifts. I love gifts. I think that that is one of the more magical parts of this year. So I like love asking people that question because it's such a this spirit of the season is so loving, i think. And gifts is such a great part of that. And it's such a great way to put yourself in somebody else's energy, you know, like what would they love? Or this is so them, or what could they use? Or what would be meaningful to them? Or like, like Marty, like how that's going to be such an amazing, like mind-blowing surprise. It's just so fun. I think it's the best part of the season.
00:11:14
Speaker
i agree. So good. Okay. So let's just go ahead and get into it.
Living Joyfully in the Present
00:11:19
Speaker
I really want to check in with everybody about where you're at currently in this season as we're wrapping up the year. we're moving into a new year. So, you know, we talk a lot about wintering. We talk a lot about, um you know, on our last episode, we talked about releasing, you know, and the year of the snake, but just energetically, like in this now moment, where are you guys at going into this last week or what week and a half of the year? How are you guys feeling?
00:11:53
Speaker
I'm feeling great. i feel like I'm actually kind of going into more of a hibernation mode. I don't really kind of reemerge until spring. That's been my thing these last few years.
00:12:06
Speaker
I'm really listening to my body. And for me, January is December's busy. January is like my rest reset like ponder what I'm doing. But in past years, i like, it was like pressure for me. Like what, who am I going to be this year? What do i not want to take with me? Who do I, what, what am I doing?
00:12:29
Speaker
And this year is totally different. I'm like, I'm just waiting for it to come to me. I'm waiting to feel it. I'm not making it a, I'm not making it content.
00:12:41
Speaker
I'm not making it a blog post. I'm not doing anything, but keeping it all for myself. I love that. It's nice. ah Yeah. and I mean, obviously, like how how do you feel, and especially in comparison?
00:12:57
Speaker
I feel so good. I feel like internal joy and that there's the pressure is so off. Like for- It makes me emotional because I feel like every day is so full of this tasking and like thinking about my business and how I can do this and how I can do this.
00:13:18
Speaker
And every time I go into Reiki or see an intuitive or all of this woo-woo things that I do, they're always like, you've already built it. You just refuse to let it come.
00:13:32
Speaker
And I'm just like, what does that mean? Because I have to get this done and I have to get this done and I have to get this done. And like you guys were saying earlier, like just letting it go because there's so many things that don't actually need to get done that actually block all these blessings.
00:13:52
Speaker
And I'm telling you, I have been taking a huge step back and some things have been happening with my daughter and my personal life as they seem to keep happening.
00:14:04
Speaker
the amount of love that I'm getting um that I didn't even ask for, that I didn't from places I didn't know it would come from has been awesome. Like yesterday, my daughter said, how was your day, my little one? And I said, it was back to back.
00:14:19
Speaker
Great. She was like, usually I say it was back to back clients, super busy. Right. And I was like, it was back to back. Great. And she like looks at me and she's like, wow, what was great about it And I was like, everybody was awesome.
00:14:34
Speaker
And i I don't think that's new. i think I'm just appreciating it and letting it in. It's like, it's been there. You're just finally like maybe letting your walls down yeah and letting the pressure off.
00:14:47
Speaker
Yes. And I'm not replaying. um, the past. I'm not talking about the past. I'm not doing any of that. I was just completely present, not talking about anything from the past, these past few days. And it's been awesome.
00:15:06
Speaker
Where do you think this shift has come from or happened? Like, do you, do you feel like there was a significant shift or you've just let this unfold? Um,
00:15:18
Speaker
I don't really know to tell you the truth. It's like divine.
00:15:24
Speaker
Yeah. I definitely think it's God. so Dang. That's really beautiful. Yeah. This year you've definitely been working on moving into a more feminine energy and really pulled that direction, which is basically exactly what you're saying. You know, that's just a very feminine energy that you're – think you're getting better and better at – letting that in and leaning into it.
00:15:52
Speaker
Yes. It's finally sinking in, but I think it's not even sinking in. It's like, I'm finally just letting my heart take over instead of my brain.
00:16:04
Speaker
Yeah. My ego. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. That's really important. You know, I had a conversation. i did have some energy work on Friday.
00:16:14
Speaker
and so I love what you were just saying about not talking about the past, but right Or even just the past few days. right like Even just in the immediate kind of drama and experience that you're having. Because I have some stuff going on with my family right now. And I will like pick up the phone and tell Tiffany and my best friend from high school. And I'm like you know all worked up about it. And then when I was with her, she she was like, stop you know Just...
00:16:43
Speaker
bring your energy back to yourself because you're just leaking all of this energy everywhere instead of just letting things be what they're going to be and just keeping all of that energy, you know, keeping your energy and pulling that back into you is a really powerful, you know, very feminine practice. But I think that...
00:17:05
Speaker
it keeps you so present. Like you're saying with your clients, you're like, oh, it was always there. you know But when you're not talking about the drama that's going on in your life, and you're not talking about the past or anything like that, you just allow things to be what they're going to be. And it like opens space for more love to drop into every situation and every interaction without bringing anything else into it.
00:17:29
Speaker
Does that make sense? Yes. I heard this quote that has been resonating with me that said, um, you, your future is created from your present.
00:17:42
Speaker
And if you are all in your present moment thinking or talking about your past, then your past is creating your future. And it's like,
00:17:53
Speaker
I just keep, that just keeps replaying every time, you know, someone wants to ask me that hasn't seen me for a year. that asks me like, oh, how's, how's the divorce? How's this?
00:18:05
Speaker
You know? And I'm just like, it's great. It's wonderful. We're getting along so well because there's, there are lots of great moments. And so I'm just like, i am going to create a different future than, kind you know, ruminating. I don't, it doesn't do any good to talk about,
00:18:22
Speaker
I don't need to talk about why I left ever again. Yeah. Yeah. You know? Yeah. It's very Joe Dispenza. Yeah. It's giving Joe Dispenza.
00:18:35
Speaker
Yeah. Which is so, so powerful. I love that. If if you haven't read Becoming Supernatural, oh my goodness. It is such a good, such a powerful book.
00:18:49
Speaker
I bought that book at Barnes and Noble a few weeks ago. haven't started it yet. It's kind of like I've said before, you kind of have to be in a place to receive it. And then you have to take in small bits at a time. But even last week when I was going through, at last week I was hit with so many different situations like in every area of my life. And I finally, one morning I sat down and I picked that book back up and I went back through all of my highlights, everything that was tabbed. And literally by that night, everything resolved itself.
00:19:21
Speaker
Because I just put myself back. I was like, okay, okay. Bring the energy back in and you know sit in but the feelings of everything being resolved. Sit in the energy of how you want the future to be and let that energy and those emotions just flow.
00:19:40
Speaker
And the rest of my day, it was just like one thing after another, everything resolved itself. And I wouldn't even have expected that to happen, you know? And yeah. So if you guys haven't like read that book, I do highly, highly recommend it. I think it's one of those, you could probably take an entire year to just read it very slowly and implement it very slowly. But you know, another thing she said that was so interesting is And I think it goes along with what we're talking about, like shutting and letting go. And a lot of what we were talking about on our last episode and moving into a feminine energy too, which I think a lot of us have been doing this year, is integration. Tiffany, did I tell... Okay.
00:20:23
Speaker
No. you know how healing... It would be lovely if it was linear. but You know, like if you... i went through to therapy or like we're shutting these things and we're learning these lessons and, you know, we're reading the books and all the things, but it isn't just up on up, up and up, right? It's not linear. It's not like, oh, I learned these things and I have these tools and everything's going to be amazing from here. You you think that in the moment, but then things will happen. Things will pop up that will challenge you like, you'll drop back into this other timeline or you're going to drop back into, you know, this energy that you thought that you were out of.
00:21:03
Speaker
And that's just a part of integration, right? So it's like you're you're on the up and up and you're feeling really good and you've healed these things and you've done this work, you've come to these conclusions, you've made these decisions, but then all of a sudden something will happen and you'll kind of like dip back down for a minute. But it's really, you know, our, we we're just going to say like our higher self saying like, hey, these things are going to come up. You do have the tools, you have done the work. So are you going to stay there? are you going to like shift back into that? Or are you going to rise back up and then we'll just like, you know, keep going from there? You know, i am not a believer that the universe tests you. I believe we're just in alignment with different things. We're like, oh, I want this thing. i can see this future. That means scientifically, it really does mean that there is a probability of it, you know, but it's a matter of us shifting,
00:21:53
Speaker
into that energy or shifting in alignment with that, which is going to take a lot of letting go of our limiting beliefs and stuff like that. So I actually believe that that's kind of more where we feel like we're tested is like, we're just not quite, there's still some work to do before we're fully in alignment with that thing that we say that we want. It's not the universe testing you because the universe can only respond to you, but I feel like there is just that piece of, Oh, I'm integrating. Right. Like, yes, I've dipped down just a little bit, but I have the tools or I know these things, even if that tool is like, stop talking about it.
00:22:28
Speaker
You know what I Like, just stop, like, just drop it, let it go, stop talking about it. And that's going to even keep you in that energy. Does that make sense? It was just so profound. And I'm like, man, I've done all this healing this year. I've been feeling so amazing. And then these things pop up and it just like dragged me back down. And I was kind of feeling,
00:22:47
Speaker
confused
Integration and Healing
00:22:48
Speaker
about that. I'm like, how did I get back down here? And she's like, no, you're just, it's called integration. That's ah a normal thing to have happen. And it's a huge gift. Yeah. You're not permanently down there no because you know, that's not where you want to live. There was a time you didn't even know that wasn't where you wanted to live. You were there. You're not there. Now you're like, how did I get here? Because you recognize it's a different place. So yeah. Yeah.
00:23:13
Speaker
Yeah. Anyways, like, I love what you're saying, but I do think it's really important to just stop leaking energy where you don't need to leak it. There's always going to be drama things going on, but we're either going to be giving more attention to it and then also...
00:23:29
Speaker
Oh, you're kind of putting that, those types of emotions on other people too, you know, which I think it's important to have maybe one or two really safe people. I do talk to Tiffany about everything, you know, like she's always going to know what's going on, but I'm like, does any, ah does everybody else, do I really need to, you know, keep this conversation going with, you know, in this place and in this place and in this place. And the truth is I don't.
00:23:54
Speaker
You know, we don't need to do that. We don't need to keep leaking that energy. And it's so powerful to just stay in the present moment. I'm not being faced with that thing right now. So I don't need to talk about it and bring it into the present moment because that will create the future. Yeah. i love that. That's a really good reminder. Keep our energy safe.
00:24:16
Speaker
Keep it safe. Absolutely. ah Gabby, where are you at? Handling the holidays. So i guess, um, I feel like I found more balance this year with like the work-life balance. So going into the holidays, i was excited and to not be hustling through them.
00:24:39
Speaker
Like, I feel like it was a normal thing for me to do. Like thinking back on this time last year, it's like, of course I'm still in the restaurant, but it's like, okay, how many shifts can I get? Like,
00:24:54
Speaker
incorporating it all and you don't have to do it all, you know, like finding time for rest and like seeing what your calendar reflects is something that's been on the forefront of my mind.
00:25:05
Speaker
Um, a lot more family time. Like it was even brought to my attention by somebody last week that was like, we were out to dinner, like on a Thursday night. And she was like, with like my husband and then his, uh, twin and his girlfriend. And she was like, yeah, like you've been around a lot more and I'm like, I love it.
00:25:29
Speaker
I really love it. You know, because That's just, I've always been like the grinder, like, let's go, let's just work, work, work. And it's, it's not, it doesn't have to always be about that. So I think that was like kind of a release for me this year. So heading into the holidays was exciting for me and like going to Christmas parties and being a part of family dinners and seeing like what my calendar is reflecting.
00:25:57
Speaker
um And it's kind of nice Like looking back on a conversation that I had. So in Virginia Beach and in Virginia, we get pretty much every season, but it doesn't necessarily mean we're always going to see snow. Well, yesterday was the winter solstice and we had already seen snow probably two or three times and it was technically fall and it's December and we never get snow in December. But I had a conversation with somebody about the persimmon tree. Did I tell you guys about this? Mm-mm.
00:26:29
Speaker
So she had a persimmon tree. I was buying cookies from her. She's like ah a local baker. And I was like, is that a persimmon tree? And she's like, yeah, I don't know how I feel about them. And I'm like, yeah, I don't really like the flavor of them. They are kind of giving like a weird tomato, like they need to be in a jam or something. She was like, well, apparently if you cut open the persimmon and then you cut open the seed, the seed is supposed to kind of predict the weather.
00:26:54
Speaker
So you're supposed to see like a spoon, a fork or a knife. And she's like, well, this year i saw a spoon and that means a harsh winter. And I'm like, oh, is that right? So that basically means a wet and snowy winter.
00:27:09
Speaker
And it's already aligning that way. And it was interesting because we had the talk probably back beginning of November or something like that. And I think it's just a sign too for like what Marty was saying, like hibernating and it being okay to like be inside and being cozy and like enjoying that time together with your people or your person or your fur babes. Um, but it's also, um, cool for me too, because looking back on last year, i wasn't where I am right now. so
00:27:44
Speaker
thinking ahead, it'll be interesting to be in December of 2026, looking back on this December and having something to compare it to, because I feel like my business has grown a lot already this year and how I'm handling it now with the like growing pains, if you will. Um, and just things you've never navigated before. um I'm just taking it, how it feels like going with the flow and not putting so much pressure on myself. So I'm handling the holidays as I see fit.
00:28:18
Speaker
Well, Gabby, give us, give everyone some context about you working as a server and where you're at this year with that and your aesthetics business versus last year. Okay. So.
00:28:32
Speaker
Let's see. I moved into a new salon suite in August. I had been in a smaller hair salon where I grew up for probably about a year.
00:28:46
Speaker
it was a really great starting point in, you know, getting to practice what I've already learned, still going through master esthetician school, building clientele, um,
00:28:58
Speaker
This and that, but um it just was not aligning with the vision that I had for elevated aesthetics, which is kind of where I was reaching out and talking to estheticians and coaches about some just guidance and like where to even start because you feel a little bit lonely and you're not sure who you can trust and maybe the area of like who you can talk to about business So um found a really safe place with y'all to talk about that. And moving out of the hair salon was probably the best thing I could have done for my business. um
00:29:41
Speaker
It just opened up a whole new world of what's possible for me. And um it felt really good doing it it. was scary, but it's like you knew it needed to be done, you know?
00:29:55
Speaker
I just needed that little extra like push. um And I've always just felt, I think when I was in that space of that hair salon, I felt like I had to be at the restaurant to be able to make everything meet, right?
00:30:14
Speaker
Well, just within a couple months of being in the salon suite now, I had realized like, oh, this is like becoming more than I thought it was going to be and wasn't really sure how i was going to sustain that, like the business I was getting with elevated aesthetics and how I was going to still be able to work in the restaurant. And, you know, you talk about that being your goal of getting out of the restaurant, but you're like, Oh my gosh, like I'm like in it right now. Like this is not sustainable to be, to be doing all that and having one day off a week and doubles here. And they're like, that's no that's not.
00:30:50
Speaker
And as a woman too, like with our hormones and cycle and all that, like that that's not necessary. So, um, yeah, had like a lot of morning journals where I was like speaking how I want my life to look, you know?
00:31:13
Speaker
And that it's okay to scale back because it's going to be okay, you know? And so that feels really good releasing that this year. And like the hustle culture isn't necessary. i love the restaurant. I feel like when I am there less, it's just better, you know, like you're like there to just have fun and it's just so different, you know? um But yeah, yeah, there's been a lot, like so much has happened this year. Like yeah when I went back to the beginning of 2025 and was looking at pictures, I was like, I have done so much.
00:31:51
Speaker
I have done yes so so much traveling, business, personal, like, wow. It's crazy. Because you live like five lives already. Mm-hmm. Yeah. There's been a really big shift with you, though, um since i feel since you have kind of come to that conclusion and you you know walked away a little bit more from the restaurant. Your energy, I know Tiffany would agree, like you're a lot more chill than you were when we first started working with you and a lot more just in...
00:32:26
Speaker
flow and a state of trust and surrender because you have realized, you know, that there is safety in where you're putting your energy, you know, and to your treatment room.
00:32:39
Speaker
yeah And that when you, learn to be yeah. And like when you make those decisions, it's so weird. I think from a coaching perspective, it's always easy for Tiffany and I to know how everything's going to unfold. We're like, you're going to be fine. You know, you're going to get into this new space because you're not in alignment with where you were. We got you into the new space. And then we were like this.
00:32:59
Speaker
She thinks she still wants to be in the restaurant, you know, but pretty soon she's not going to be, you know, and then. And then ever since you're just like a more chill flowing Gabby. Yeah. Because you don't really look at it like a job per se when you're in your room, like in your treatment room, you know, um everything is so much more intentional and like one-on-one time is so great with, with people like, yeah, the conversations, all of it.
00:33:33
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. like You get to to see it on that side. oh It's the most rewarding feeling ever to be like, no, you're going to be okay. And we're going to, we're going to get you where you want to be. And you'll come to these conclusions yourself.
00:33:47
Speaker
um Can we talk about 75 medium? Can you just share what you were just saying about that? Because I think it's really powerful. And, um you know, it's funny, I'm not sure that you're the first person we've had this conversation with. Tiffany, and there's someone else that we're in the midst of having this conversation with too. And I can't remember the context of it. So I think it's hilarious that you said that. ah So tell us more about that.
00:34:14
Speaker
Okay. It had been on my mind a little bit because I was on chat like, okay, what does 75 hard like consist of exactly? And then I was like, that's aggressive. Like, it's just too much. Like we get, it's like a mental toughness kind of thing, but like, we don't need to go like a hundred percent.
00:34:34
Speaker
for 75 days straight. Like I think we need to start with the basics of things that you think can be attainable and then just keep up with those things, you know, especially if you don't have anything in place.
00:34:46
Speaker
And um i have been in like a like a more strict regimented, like, I guess, a lifestyle approach. But that's something that I've also kind of let go of a little bit this year. And it's making it a little bit more difficult around the holidays, which is where I was going with 75 medium with like kind of starting the new year.
00:35:07
Speaker
And then also like having just this open conversation with my husband who is like, doesn't of really, he doesn't have anything set in stone for the way he lives his lifestyle. And I think it would be really good for him to have some things in place because of everything he went through this year and his health. And it's not anything crazy, but it's just like, you paid so much money out of
Gabby's Adaptation of 75 Hard Challenge
00:35:33
Speaker
pocket to get you where you are right now that it would serve you so well to just have some like basic things in place. So like one of them that is not going to change for 75 medium is like zero alcohol.
00:35:47
Speaker
I could live my life zero alcohol. Like every, I, it doesn't affect me like that because when I do drink, I just don't show up the next day the way I said I was going to. And that to me is just, that's not serving me.
00:36:02
Speaker
So And I think it's it would be a good time just to be like, everybody does dry January. It's a normal thing. But for me, I'm like, I could probably do it without call forever.
00:36:14
Speaker
I don't care. But you have that like... Gabby, really quick. Let's pause for a second. year' We can't hardly hear you. There's something that just happened with your sound. It's like going down.
00:36:28
Speaker
Did you get any notifications or anything coming through? There was a jet. chat. Okay. Try again. Can you hear me now?
00:36:38
Speaker
A little bit. It's really quiet all of a sudden.
00:36:47
Speaker
You might just
00:36:54
Speaker
you might i just have to enunciate and kind of yeah talk really loud. Yeah. Okay. um Okay. No alcohol. We're done with that. Are we good? Yep.
00:37:05
Speaker
um Second, it was like two 45 minute workouts, one being outside no matter the weather. it That's a hard no, dude. No.
00:37:16
Speaker
So I was, I was like, we could do one 45 minute workout. It could be a walk. It could be whatever you want it to be. Jesse, you could do body weight for 20 minutes in the morning or whatever. I was like 45 minutes. That's fine. I think that just in general, that's very attainable for somebody like two people that are very like healthy already. It'd be good.
00:37:41
Speaker
Then, um, but We did like you're supposed to be on some type of diet. And mine was pretty much like a low inflammation diet, right? So it doesn't necessarily have to be no gluten, no dairy, but I'm kind of leaning into like,
00:37:57
Speaker
We need to cut out sugar as much as possible. But I left room for like a cheat meal a week. Like I was like, that can be fun. i know Jesse's going to need that. He there's apps. I just already know like how he is. and I'm like, already been playing with like different recipes and stuff at home that I feel like could suffice for him. Cause I'm also like, Hmm.
00:38:20
Speaker
This man could definitely cheat on this whole 75 medium and then never tell me. And I'm never going to know, but I want him to like really stick with it. Then the 10 pages of self-help love that. Absolutely love that.
00:38:33
Speaker
um I think it's wonderful. 80 ounces of water, not 128. I'm sorry. what Like that's so much water, dude. that's hard yeah Like wake up in the middle of the night.
00:38:47
Speaker
And then it was like a progress picture every day, but I was like, maybe we could do that weekly. And I think that we want to start January 5th, like on a Monday. And I'm still willing to go back and revisit because I said to him, I was like, are there things that you feel like you need to set in place for yourself that are just a little too loosey goosey right now that don't even have anything to do with like the rules of 75 hard? Like, could it be like for me, like no social until I'm done with my self-care in the morning. Like, do we really need to get strict on that? Like, you know, like, I'm like, what are little things? So, cause I've even had somebody do 75 soft.
00:39:27
Speaker
This is somebody that was trying to get pregnant, like really trying to lower like her cortisol and like stress levels, you know? So I just respect anything of like trying to better yourself. And that's basically where that conversation led to.
00:39:40
Speaker
And with everything that's gone on with him this year and the goals that I think he sees for himself, I'm like, it would be really good to set yourself up, like with a little bit of mental discipline.
00:39:54
Speaker
And it's just going to make you better, you know? And it translates over into all these other areas in your life too. so And I was like, and I see you all the time. it would be really cool if we did it together and held each other accountable. I see you a lot. Like it would just be that much easier where you can be like, I'm having a day. Like this is hard, you know, like, okay, let's go to the grocery store and let's go, you know, that type of thing.
00:40:24
Speaker
it was kind of more of like a Like a bonding thing for marriage too, because we'll be going on year two next year. Yeah. Yeah. Well, what is your guys' thoughts? So here's a really good question. ah tiffany and I have talked about this. So I'm curious about in your guys' opinion – When we're working with a more feminine energy and when we're trying to lean into that more, then where does structure come into play, right? You know what I mean? Like where does the the discipline and the structure have a space
00:41:00
Speaker
for the feminine energy? How do you kind of marry those two things together? What is your guys's thoughts and opinions on that? Because it could be said that the masculine energy is the more like a disciplined control, you know, i am going to do 45 minutes Minutes twice per day, regardless of the weather, a type of an energy, right? So where do you guys think there could be, i don't know if I want to use the word balance, but like an integration of structure and feminine energy at the same time that is going to feel a lot better, I think, to all of us who are leaning into our feminine aspects and energy.
00:41:40
Speaker
Yeah. So I think that what I've been learning that The feminine is the flow, but without a masculine container, it just flows all over.
00:41:55
Speaker
And so it does have to have some direction. So there's a time for us to just flow. We need to have those times where it's us do, you know, being in that feminine and, um, as silly as it might sound like, you know, dancing and lighting candles and making your space beautiful and all of those things.
00:42:16
Speaker
But that also the the feminine needs that masculine container in order to get things done, because let's face it, we have stuff we have to do.
00:42:26
Speaker
And it's actually okay to have a masculine container because women, you know, since the beginning of time, even though with goddesses and all of that, they still had responsibilities.
00:42:38
Speaker
So they still, and families and things they had to do. So it wasn't just like all the men doing all the tasks and women were laying around doing nothing. That's not feminine, right? Even though that sounds amazing. um But it's like, how do you do your flowy inside of this container that you have? And so that's what I keep picturing. um Instead of me being like, here's the container and I need to fit some flow in there.
00:43:07
Speaker
Now I'm just like, here's my flowy. What's going like come around that to help guide me? And so for me, that really switched things in my brain. I mean, and it's not fully integrated. Believe me. Yeah.
00:43:19
Speaker
I'm just having to like really like every day remind myself like you that doesn't need done. You don't need to do that. and And being feminine doesn't mean you can't like go dig in the dirt and do stuff like that because that's very feminine. Grounding, being...
00:43:37
Speaker
dirty and doing all of those things. It's just giving yourself those rigid schedules. And so I like the idea of like, yes, I have to go out and feed my farm animals in the morning.
00:43:48
Speaker
But if i want to take an extra 10 minutes out there, because I'm just going to snuggle the donkey, like I'm not going to tell myself you're going to be 10 minutes late. late. I'm like, I'm just doing that. I'm going to be late today. Journey's not going to get a very cute hairstyle today because i want to do this because it feeds my soul.
00:44:10
Speaker
And that's kind of how I'm doing it.
00:44:14
Speaker
I like that. Yeah.
00:44:19
Speaker
I like that too.
00:44:21
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Like I was talking to a client the other day, kind of ah about like a Like the brain dumps that we've talked about, right? Like you've got the list of the now and the list of the visionary.
00:44:34
Speaker
And she kind of like put in a tidbit of like a five three one um way to look at it. Like where the one is like something that needs to be done like that month. It's on the list, but it's not immediate, you know? Three could be for the like week and five could be for the day, you know, and it doesn't always have to be business related. It could definitely be life related in general.
00:44:58
Speaker
But um I think that as long as you. are intentional about what you are wanting to do that day, it's going to get done.
00:45:10
Speaker
Right. And that's like kind of the masculine of like, okay, but the flow around it can be okay. It doesn't have to be like the 30 minute timeline checklist of like, okay, I'm done with that at that time that like, it can be, you know, fluid.
00:45:31
Speaker
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And it feels good to do like those brain dumps sometimes where you write it all down. Like sometimes I just feel like this anxiety inside me that says I have to do that.
00:45:43
Speaker
But I was like laughing because i have all of these notebooks and I keep all my to-do lists because in case I needed to go back to them, but you want to know what? I never go back to them. That sounds terrible.
00:45:58
Speaker
So I'm like, how important was everything on that? yeah And so I'm just doing it. I'm doing it as a brain dump instead of just this to-do list because I'm sick and tired of like completely checking things off. I mean, it feels good some days, but it's like, sometimes you remember a month later and you're like, oh, I didn't do that. I mean, was it that important, but like nothing died and nothing like, you know,
00:46:26
Speaker
like But it feels like that in a moment sometimes. Oh, I completely agree with that. I completely agree with that. We make things in emergency that just are not, you know, I'm i'm not like that. But um it's taken me years to like undo that about myself. and But I often work with people who are like that.
00:46:48
Speaker
And as an observer, I'm just like, damn, you're making everything harder. Like you're making your life so hard. You're trying to have all this control, you know, by making everything like so important that just like, it's not, you know, and, and your nervous system matters. And I just think this is why you're sick all the time. You know, this is why you're like, so stressed out. That's why you're sick. That's why your hormones are crazy.
00:47:14
Speaker
But I think that If you really look at your to-do list, ah most of – love what Gabby just said about the 5-3-1. And I was listening to Brendan Brouchard years ago. I used to be really into him. It's a little too much for me now, but he's like a high-performance coach.
00:47:35
Speaker
And he, on a New Year's episode, was like, if there's this project that you've had in the back of your mind for like a year or two years and you haven't done it yet, you should probably just take it off of your list. You know, you should probably just get that energy out because if you haven't done it yet, you know, then it's probably not that important to you, which is very much like... going through your to-do list and just removing things that are really not that important. We've made them seem really important or it's like, you know, things can land on our to-do list for a million different reasons. I've even got to a place now where when I'm with my spa partners, I pause before im like, let me do this. Let me do this. Let's do this. I'll make this for you. I'll do these tools. I've gotten to a place where I will take a deep breath and really ask myself, like, is it
00:48:27
Speaker
not, you know, is it really important or like how big of a priority would this be? I'm just better at like not over committing myself to something that may or may not even be implemented or like make that big of a difference, if that makes sense, right? And i think when you are like, hey, my time is literally so important. And to me, that all also means that I can lay on my couch for an hour during the day if I want to and like read a book, right? or do nothing. To me, that still matters. Do you guys know what I'm saying? Like, my time is so important that that also includes being okay to
00:49:08
Speaker
eat my lunch and then just still sit there for 30 minutes if I want to do that, right? Without having so much on my plate that probably doesn't need to be there. Like it's still my me time.
00:49:22
Speaker
And I think when you get to that point where you're like, oh, but but my time really is so precious regardless of what that looks like or what someone else's judgment is of that. then it's a lot easier to remove things from your list or to not keep adding things to your list that just don't probably really need to be there. And as an observer, I've watched what happens, especially when women do that.
00:49:43
Speaker
They're the most sick women that I know.
00:49:48
Speaker
When I think practices like that continue to... um help you put yourself first because when we do get those little, like an hour on the couch and then we're like, man, I really needed this. yeah And the when our schedule isn't filled to the brim and then we're like, man, my nervous system did need this time. And then it it does help become this driving force of wanting more of that. And it's a very, very feminine energy.
00:50:14
Speaker
And so I think just like, yes, we have to choose it and we do have to continue to choose it. At the same time, when we do choose it, it can really be a driving force if we're in the space to recognize it. Yeah.
00:50:29
Speaker
Yeah, I love the thought of needing the masculine direction or like having that masculine container for the feminine energy. I think that's really powerful. I also have told people recently too, you can do, because Marty, like you said, there's there's always tasks. There are always things to do. And especially, you know, you and Tiff are moms. And so there's many things that really do have to be, you know, checked off. But it's also just the intention in which we do it.
00:50:59
Speaker
You know, the energy behind how we're doing these tasks can either be from a very masculine energy. And I do think there's a time and a place for that. But I've been trying to just do things with more of a flow and ah a rhythm. One of our other coaching clients, um she won't mind me saying who this is. Her name is Lauren. And she is, I've been working with her for like eight years now. She said this to us the other day. She was like, rhythm and flow, rhythm and flow. And I was like, hell yeah. Yeah. Hell yeah, that feels amazing. And so I also feel like, you know, success can just look like rhythm and flow.
00:51:37
Speaker
And she's not the first person who has said that, that it's really like landed with me, that success can feel soft and flowing and peaceful and have just like a rhythm to it versus a rigidity. Yeah.
00:51:51
Speaker
I feel like that's how success should be. I should feel totally a great, like quality of life. Absolutely. You know, what are you iing yeah i was just going to say momentum sounds masculine, but like rhythm and flow sounds like.
00:52:07
Speaker
Doesn't feel good? It feels juicy
Success as Rhythm and Flow
00:52:09
Speaker
and like delicious when you hear that. I feel like your nervous system is just kind of like, oh yeah, that's nice. Marty, what were you going say? That I just keep reminding myself that I'm buying my time with work.
00:52:21
Speaker
So instead of like, you know, I've got to build this, I've got to do this. It's like, no, I'm doing this so I can do the things that I want to do. Mm-hmm. instead of doing it. So I continue to create more jobs for myself, which is sort of boat mode, which I lived in all of my life yeah and my health. I've got, you know, two autoimmune diseases. i mean, it's a real thing. Like you said, biggest women, you know, i was one of them, even though I looked successful and high functioning, miserable, like completely miserable. um,
00:53:00
Speaker
It's just been in the last, it's literally changed. 2025 has changed my life for sure. It was coming up, it was building, but 2025 is when like these shifts internally really happened.
00:53:16
Speaker
And it wasn't just about like, I'm healing, I'm healing, I'm doing all the work, I'm doing the work, the work, the work. And it was just like, no, I am. And that was amazing.
00:53:28
Speaker
Explain that a little more when you say like, i am, no I am. I'm not doing the work. i am like, I'm here. I am these things. I'm not trying to figure out how to not have, you know, posture syndrome. I'm not trying to figure out why I belong in this room with you guys. I'm not trying to figure out if I'm worthy enough to hold this money. i'm not, am am I, can I lead this team?
00:53:54
Speaker
I am doing it and I am deserving of it. And that feels so good. Mm. That's really powerful. i feel that a lot. Absolutely. Yeah.
00:54:08
Speaker
So good.
00:54:12
Speaker
Tiff, where are you at? You're taking this whole week off. I am. I'm just working this morning. um Interestingly enough, though, i got up this morning, got out of bed and was like headed for the bathroom. And I looked at the Christmas tree and It's going to sound terrible coming out of my mouth, but i had the thought come to me, i hate Christmas.
00:54:32
Speaker
And then I was like, I literally whipped my head around, like, where did that come from? and then I was like, hopped in the show, you know, a brush with my teeth, hopped in the shower. And it was really bothering me because I've, and I've shared this with Jess and like my community on socials, like I have been in the most peaceful state I've ever been in my life this holiday season. And I have enjoyed it so much. I don't think I ever have. And I've just had so much joy and like not pressure. And I've really enjoyed shopping for my family and friends and decorating the Christmas tree, things that I've never really enjoyed doing.
00:55:07
Speaker
And so that thought that popped in my head was like, kind of knocked me back because I have been in such a blissful state. And then I it was just like, it was kind of sinking me. And so i sat down on the couch all by myself and i like said this prayer and I was like, what is this? And I just kind of, I said a prayer and I had to meditate on it.
00:55:31
Speaker
And really what came to me was Actually, five years ago, Christmas time was a really, really hard time for our family. i was in a really hard time in my marriage. My husband was going through a lot and it was, it was just a rough Christmas. And then I was like, huh? And so anyways, just sitting there and praying and meditating on that. And the part about the integration, Jess, that you were talking about earlier really struck me because i think I haven't given myself
00:56:03
Speaker
I don't know, or maybe because I've been in survival mode for a long time, I haven't had the space to like, let that come up and really like, it's always been this, like, oh, that was a rough Christmas. We're never looking at, at that again. you know, thank God we're on the other side of that, but it did come up. And then I was able to just kind of very, sounds weird, but very quickly work through those feelings and just have so much gratitude for where I'm at now, where my family is at now, where my marriage is at now, where my own nervous system is at now and be like, okay. And thinking on the year of the snake and the end of this nine year cycle and all of these, all this reflection I've been doing in my life anyways, I'm not surprised that it came up and it was just really, it's actually been a really beautiful morning because I've been able to dive a little bit deeper into that reflection and
00:56:55
Speaker
with like love and gratitude, like let that go. does that make any sense? And I think just, it didn't occur to me until you talked to said about the integration part of like, oh, that's what that was. I'm not going to sit and ruminate on it. I'm not going to dwell on it anymore. it came up for a reason, I think for me really to release it because yes, it was hard and we're not there anymore. And we don't need to like revisit that. We don't even need to have conversations about that. Cause we've had conversations about that.
00:57:26
Speaker
It's just one of those things that it was just like that last little piece. I could have dove into it and really like sank into it and let it affect the rest of my week. Or I just can like kind of kiss it goodbye and be like, thank you.
00:57:38
Speaker
And, and I'm going to really settle into this piece and this joy that I'm haven't felt in I don't even know how long around the holiday season. I don't know if that makes any sense. i That's where I'm at. Yeah, I love that that came up for you, actually, because it obviously was stuck somewhere inside of you that just, you know, now that you're in this peaceful place, um you know, it was still able to say like, hey, there's something here that needs to be looked at so that we can truly move on from it, you know. I think when we go through really hard times, our energy and our kind of soul can fragment a little bit and it can get stuck in so many different layers and like kind of stuck in our energy field and sometimes in our body. And we'll go through life and everything is great. And then all of a sudden you're like, whoa, what is that? Like, what is this? And I've learned just like you to, um, like I sit down and I'm like, Hey, what are you doing here?
00:58:40
Speaker
You know, like give it attention. I'm like, I see you. i know you're here. What are you doing here? And what's really cool about that is that you separate yourself from it.
00:58:52
Speaker
you know And you give it, i even try to give it a way that it might look like, what does this look like physically? If I had to imagine this in my mind, like, what are you doing here? You know, this feeling, these emotions that you're, you know, you're like, where did that thought come from? And then you separate yourself from it. You welcome it in, you know, you're like, cool. I see you. what are you doing here? What are you here to teach me? What are you here to show me?
00:59:16
Speaker
and then you can let that process and just go through like allowing yourself to feel those feelings and sit in that energy and just welcome it in. And that is the only way to let this shit pass through you so that you can live a more full life. And what is so cool is that as soon as you did that, you're like, that I felt so much gratitude, you know? And that's something I've had to learn through my own therapy that keeps coming up is like when you can actually sit down and deal with those things, it just opens up more of your heart space to like let more goodness and let more love in. And you really can't experience, you know, one without the other. You can't have full joy and peace and love if you're still carrying these things around. But sometimes I don't think that we know that we are. Right. And then you just get into this moment and you're like, whoa, hey.
01:00:03
Speaker
Hi, what you doing? You know, what are we doing here? So I love that. I think it's such a great opportunity. And honestly, we've said this on another episode too, for like the holidays will do that to you. Yeah. The holidays are going to bring stuff up for people for a million different reasons, even when you don't expect it.
01:00:22
Speaker
Yeah. You know, they, take it's like an open portal in a sense yeah for everyone. And that's why a lot of people say the holidays really hard and the holidays are really hard for so many really hard. And so it's just like, I don't know, everything is just really only skin deep and it's just right at the surface. So, yeah, I think portal is a great way. And maybe that's like a winter solstice thing too, you know, that those two are just so aligned and, but I love that that came up for you to be on. I mean, it's hard, but like, I love that it did.
01:00:54
Speaker
i I do too, because again, I'm just like, man, what else needs to come up? We only have how many days until the end of the year? and Let's get this shit out. Cause I did read something yesterday. It was like either shed it in 2025 and move on or basically you're taking it with you in the next nine years. and I'm like, I don't want to take any. no done me So come on now.
01:01:14
Speaker
Yeah. blocks a ticket Yeah. Yeah. The holidays are such a great time of reflection too. It's just beautiful.
01:01:25
Speaker
Cool. um Is there anything that you guys are very intentionally letting go of as you move forward? Tiff and I have are already kind of talked about ours. What kind of comes up for you guys when you hear that or get that question?
01:01:43
Speaker
Marty, I feel like you've sent me some messages that you're like, oh, I'm really like feeling this. Yes. I'm definitely shedding that need to control. i've I've, I've realized that this need that I have to control stems from a limiting belief that if I don't control it, it's all going to go to shit and all hell is going to break loose.
Letting Go of Control
01:02:07
Speaker
And so that's, what's been so cool is being able to like, let it go so that i you know, can like just, let other stuff in.
01:02:19
Speaker
i i I never realized how much I was blocking things because of my need to control. And, um, it's silly. Like it's just,
01:02:32
Speaker
It's silly. It's this over perfectionism control. i know how to do it best, but it was, um, it happened. It came to me really crazy the other day.
01:02:44
Speaker
It's like, i I think it's been on my heart to work on it. And it's kind of like, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I don't get to work on those things because I have to keep the ship running. I've got to keep my home life going. I've got to, you know, there's all those excuses.
01:02:59
Speaker
And I came home from work the other day and my daughter on the way, wherever we were going that morning had discussed something on our property that we were going to do.
01:03:09
Speaker
and we were like on the same page, we're going to do this. This is going to be our focus. We had somebody there that was going to help us with some things. And so we needed to use his services wisely because you know,
01:03:21
Speaker
we need We had so many hours with him. And so I was like, okay, we're on the same page about what we're doing. And I got home and something completely different had been done.
01:03:33
Speaker
And I immediately felt sick inside. I felt like we wasted all these resources. This is going to cost money to work. You know, I literally i'm standing there and my daughter is waiting, like so excited about what she's done, my 17 year old.
01:03:53
Speaker
And and I'm standing there losing my shit. saying like, why did you do it that way? That's not what we discussed. Why would you do that? Like what, I mean, you don't make decisions without talking to me first. I did the whole thing.
01:04:08
Speaker
And this is, it comes up for me a lot. Cause this is what happens in my, um, this is what I'm thinking. If I'm not saying it to them, this is what I'm, I mean, even when I was married, that's what was happening. And so, um,
01:04:23
Speaker
I like sat with it. i I literally was about to scream and I got in my car and I was like, I'm just going to go for a drive. And I calmed down. i i like, I literally got my chat GPT out and said, why is this so hard for me? Why do I do this?
01:04:41
Speaker
Like, it's a visceral physical reaction. Like I was going to like explode And it was, you know, it helped me talk through the fact that I just like, you know, it comes from your childhood. If you didn't control things, things got really out of control in, in so much of my life. If I didn't control everything. And, but the crazy part is I didn't, I wasn't controlling anything, but my ego was telling me if I kept them all in this little box, then ah everything was going to be okay. Even though nothing was ever okay. Okay.
01:05:16
Speaker
And so, um you know, I went back, I took my daughter aside, i apologized. um And because I lost it in front of the guy, you know, that was helping also. And yeah everybody's just staring at me and I'm like, I am so sorry. i I'm sorry, this this works too. Like, and and and my daughter said, and if you don't like it, if it doesn't work, we can just redo it, it's not a big deal. And I was like, oh my gosh.
01:05:47
Speaker
You're right. Like, why does it feel like we're going to die if this fence didn't get built the way I wanted it to get built? Right. Why does, what is it? And so, um, I'm like, I don't know that it was impactful. Like that was so dramatic. And the, the visceral feeling I had was so dramatic that it just, I came to work the next day with like, oh my gosh, that had to happen for me because It was like I walked in this building and I was like, I see things so differently. I looked at Jessica. I looked at the other Jessica. I looked at Natalie and I was just like, whoa, okay, holy cow. Like this is wild.
01:06:31
Speaker
So that's what I'm shedding. That's what I'm like not taking in. Like, and that's, that's a non-negotiable. This is not something I'm working on. It's, ah it's like, I'm not taking it in.
01:06:42
Speaker
Oh, I like that. And I'm negotiable. Yeah. You know, it's funny things that we. I think our children will tip us over that edge in a good way if we don't.
01:06:58
Speaker
get there ourselves with other relationships in our life. Because as you know, it's like, you've got a 17 year old, my oldest is 12, so I'm not anywhere near that, but like our children are gonna grow up. They're gonna marry who they marry. They're gonna go do what they wanna do. And we do have them under this control and under our wing for so long, and then they still go off and do what they want. And so it's just very interesting though, that our children are probably like one of our greatest teachers and how that shift for you is now making you look at everything else in your life differently with different eyes. Like you walked in the next day to work and you have this like different perspective. It's really beautiful.
01:07:38
Speaker
And it's really cool that you're in a space to receive it and recognize it and not fight it anymore. Well, and the pressure has been so big because my daughter is 17. You know, you want to like, I don't want her to leave home feeling like Her mom just always, she's always like, mom, why is nothing ever good enough for you?
01:07:59
Speaker
oh and that's how I felt growing up. And you're like, why do you, why do you do that? Yeah. Makes it that much more of a non-negotiable. Yeah.
01:08:12
Speaker
Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Love it. She's really lucky yeah that you, you, that you do care and not that like, not that your parents are my parents. Cause I was raised the same way. I'm I've made you, everything you say is a mirror. So I'm like, yep, that's me too with the need to control everything. But, um, not that like any of our parents didn't care in a sense, but it's just, I don't know. Your kids are really lucky, Marty, that you care so much and that you're trying so hard to pave a different path for your family and for your kids.
01:08:49
Speaker
It matters. Yeah. Matters a lot. Welcome.
01:08:57
Speaker
Gabby, are you not taking into this next year? Do you have any super solid non-negotiables? um I wouldn't say non-negotiables. I already feel like this...
01:09:11
Speaker
um year has been super healing in ways that I wasn't expecting. And just even like, i have tears in my eyes just listening to her because I feel like I did some spiritual kind of digging this year as well with like,
01:09:28
Speaker
I'm feeling emotions a lot more and they were always like a so stuffed down. So like even hearing her, like, I know that's hard for her to say, and it's, it's making her emotional. And I just like, I'm so empathetic and like thinking like, I don't have kids yet, but like the pressure that we put on ourselves and then it just rolls over onto other people too, you know? But,
01:09:54
Speaker
but um I guess I am looking at like the perfectionism thing. doesn't It doesn't have to be a thing.
01:10:07
Speaker
Like messy over perfection. Learned that a lot this year. um Showing up as me and being cringe is hard on social media because people want to see you, but like they're coming to see you, you know, because of you. so like showing up and being yourself is like the most authentic thing that you can do.
01:10:30
Speaker
And, um, yeah, I feel like going into 2026,
01:10:38
Speaker
Just a lot of courage. Just keep keep showing up with courage. um Keep showing up with value and how you can just always be better for your people.
01:10:52
Speaker
Business and not business. um
01:10:57
Speaker
Yeah. I'm excited because I went full force into that NTP program that I'm really excited for. That was something that ruminated for a while um because of Jesse, because of the like acne lab panel that I did. so I'm really excited to learn more about that and really help people get to like root cause kind of stuff with their skin.
01:11:24
Speaker
um Yeah. More balance balance, keeping the balance, rest, relaxation. Yeah.
01:11:36
Speaker
I don't think I've really, i have a non-negotiable in mind, but like super intentional about what I'm doing.
01:11:48
Speaker
Love that. I like it. So one thing that you said that I did want to talk about is authenticity. I feel like with our industry moving forward, you it's a business strategy at this point.
Authenticity in Aesthetics Business
01:12:05
Speaker
So authenticity as a business strategy. i wonder if people, other estheticians, like we've worked with some estheticians who have had a hard time just finding their voice as an esthetician you you know, maybe we don't know what makes us really authentic. So I'm curious what your guys' thoughts are about authenticity as a business strategy and kind of how you have found your own authenticity and and just leaned into it.
01:12:35
Speaker
Yeah, I think it's... ahead. No, you can. i was i was just going to say meeting people where they're at. like but even when it comes to suggesting products and like really getting down to like the foundationals when I'm talking to people in the treatment room of like, what does your morning look like? What are your days look like? And like getting back to the basics of rest and relaxation and stress and things like that. And I feel like
01:13:07
Speaker
We're over consuming all the time online. um so a lot of my clients, I think, are doing the same and getting really ah confused on what's the right thing for them to do, you know, and letting them know like, it's okay, like,
01:13:26
Speaker
what you've seen might not be wrong, but we really want to like cater this to you and what's best for you. You know, um, like TikTok is not something that I'm normally on, but I feel like a lot of my clients are. So i feel like, I don't know if I need to just keep up on that end, but i feel like it's, it's too much.
01:13:50
Speaker
And I want to just simplify my people's lives. And, um when I come back to like meeting people where they're at, like, I don't want to ever be that esthetician that tells them they have to spend X, Y, Z on this or what they're using already isn't good enough. Or, you know, like we're all humans and we can change our minds and we can critique as we go.
01:14:14
Speaker
um yeah That's really like what I, what I wanted to say, but. I think that is your authenticity is your ability to meet people where they are, you know, and to make them feel, which I think is so important, uh,
01:14:34
Speaker
you know, no pressure and getting back to the basics. And another thing that's really authentic to you that you're leaning into is that nutrition aspect and getting to the root cause of things.
01:14:47
Speaker
So do you find that as you have leaned more into that, you're attracting people the people who are such a good fit for that and being able to retain people better because you are leaning into your authenticity and you're talking about these things more and really, you know, meeting people where they are and having those conversations.
01:15:09
Speaker
I do. And I think there is going to be like a slight shift too. Like, I think that there's just like, it's okay if I'm not for you.
01:15:19
Speaker
you know, yeah like we may have met before and I may have helped you before, but that maybe they just aren't there yet. when it And that's okay too. That's really powerful. I'm not going to be taking things personal, you know, like if people, like I can do follow-ups and check-ins and things like that, but I know what I want to do and how I want to serve. And You never know like what they could be dealing with.
01:15:49
Speaker
So I'm, that's a big one going into 2026 too, is like, don't take a personal. Yeah. Yeah.
01:15:59
Speaker
That I think goes hand in hand with true authenticity too. It does. Of, just choosing to show up as your true authentic self and knowing that like, you know, it's nothing, it's not personal. You're going to do it anyways. You're going to be you anyways.
01:16:16
Speaker
okay Love it. Thank you. Marty. I feel like, um, for me, authenticity is really showing up in the connection aspect of it as far as, you know,
01:16:33
Speaker
just kind of letting my guard down, um and letting people in a little bit more. and so, because I'm starting to believe those things about myself and that it's okay to be authentic and I am totally imperfect.
01:16:49
Speaker
Um, but I also don't need to be the first one to tell people that I'm imperfect and and flawed. It's just like, just being who I am. um And when you find that, like, I don't know it's just been such peace because I think about the people that have come into my life that have stayed or the people that I have really authentically, genuinely connected with, whether it be clients or friends or mentors.
01:17:16
Speaker
um It's because I let my guard down and I, so you know, I was myself and when you feel this need to be this persona or this, this, I'm this professional person, or this is who I am. Cause I'm a business owner. I'm the leader and putting all these titles on for me, that's when the authenticity, you know, it was like getting blurry, like, who am i Um, and I feel like there was just a period of time where it was kind of like, who am I and what am I about?
01:17:49
Speaker
um And now just letting all of that go, the connections have been amazing. We're back to, i feel stronger than ever about like barely being on social media. um i'm I'm just like, we are connecting in person. We're going to hold events.
01:18:08
Speaker
That's how we're going to market. we i'm done with this other way. Um, I was forcing it and it wasn't authentically me. Like I didn't enjoy it.
01:18:19
Speaker
Um, if I have something to say, I'm getting on, I'm going to say it, but you know, i think a couple of calls ago, I talked to you about a really hard
In-person Connections vs. Social Media
01:18:28
Speaker
day for me. And i ended up letting my social media manager go because of what was happening. And it has been like, and she was amazing by the way, like love her to death.
01:18:39
Speaker
Um, but yeah, Getting that list every week or like, this is the content we need. And this is how I need you to show up. This is the hook I want you to use. This is how many seconds I need the video to be.
01:18:51
Speaker
i was like a robot and I hated it. And I couldn't even watch myself. It was so cringe for me because I was just like, ah that's not what I want to talk about.
01:19:01
Speaker
Like, I don't, I don't, ah you know, i don't actually need ideas to talk about. I have a lot of stuff I like to say when I say it. Like, right. I don't shut up, but I'm like, but I don't, people were feeling, I felt like they were feeling it. And we were just focusing on like, how many views did that get? And how many, how many click throughs and how many, whatever. And I was like, I never focused on that before. And I had this humongous business that I built.
01:19:29
Speaker
And I feel like ever since we started focusing on that sales are down and Like, so I went back to, i was like, I stopped going to all of the beauty schools because I don't know, I was just too busy, too overwhelmed. And I'm like, I'll send my staff and sales for this, the Academy went down. um and it's not because they're not capable. It's because people want that my energy, um, that's what they're connected to.
01:19:57
Speaker
And so I just last week I did two beauty school things and they were the funnest thing I've done in a long time. And everybody was interested. And I was like, oh my gosh, maybe I could be a beauty school teacher because this was so fun.
01:20:11
Speaker
I don't want to do that. But I was like, okay, this is, this is just goes back to like, it's, I don't know. I just keep getting all of these like, yep, you're on the right track. Yep. You're on the right track.
01:20:23
Speaker
When it goes back to you already like, You've already done this. You already have the tools in your toolbox. We kind of go, but we, we can forget and then think like we need new tools. We constantly need to keep filling up our toolbox when actually that we have these beautiful, amazing tools already in there that we're not using anymore.
01:20:43
Speaker
Yes,
Aligning with Authenticity in Business
01:20:44
Speaker
I know. And we keep hiring. I think that mentors and coaches are absolutely important. Um, but I think if you're not being authentically you, you can hire the wrong person. Oh yeah.
01:20:56
Speaker
And if you're, or if maybe you're looking up to somebody that you are like, oh, but she did this and then you hire them. And that has been like, I'm, I don't think I've made, you know, mistakes with my coaches, but I have had people that have completely steered my business in a way that did not feel like my business anymore. Now I'm bringing that back and that feels good.
01:21:21
Speaker
do you know what has me thinking this morning when I was getting ready, I was curling my hair and I was like, you know, kind of going through my next steps and getting out the door and what I had to do this morning. And then it occurred to me that like, man, I have, I have carved out this career, this business, this, these businesses, all of these things out of like literally thin air.
01:21:44
Speaker
And like, I've done that and not to say I have done it alone. I've done it with so much help and resources and my guides and God and all of the things. But like, it kind of took me back to be like, man, I've created a job for myself and for other people because I have this team.
01:22:02
Speaker
And now I'm getting the opportunity to actually, i have these apprentices starting who are going to become estheticians like, and, and, and all these things. And it's just like, I don't think we give ourselves credit. All of us here, all of us, everyone listening to this, that we've created something out of thin air. That's truly authentic to who we are and what we wanted, probably led by our higher selves, because what i think we can all agree that when we started, we didn't know exactly what we wanted, but Here we are.
01:22:31
Speaker
And I just think how amazing it is and how it wouldn't really have been possible if we didn't choose our true authenticity and followed our intuition. I think authenticity for me is truly connected, deeply rooted to our own intuition. And I think that, like you said, Marty, we can get led astray.
01:22:54
Speaker
Sometimes I think I've seen it happen most with like social media helpers, people hiring estheticians, hiring social media helpers to help run their social media because social media is such a daunting task. And that's where I'm just like, yeah like you know, i I see things go so astray really quickly, but you're right about the coaching world too. And just because it works for one person or a handful of persons this way, if it doesn't feel right in your gut, and if it doesn't feel truly authentic to you, then it's not going to work for you.
01:23:27
Speaker
Yeah. Well, and your business is your baby. And so it is when you're bringing in outside sources, not everybody is going to, i don't know, like align with what that is or like see that. Even when I have my sister try to create stuff for social media, she doesn't listen to this. So I don't, I'm like, no, that's not,
01:23:51
Speaker
who I am or like, that's not who we are, but it comes back to like, it our businesses are an extension of ourselves. And so then when you're bringing other people into it in any capacity, it just can bring on you know, a different energy if they're not completely aligned and I don't know that anyone will ever be completely aligned, right? Because like, it's ours, it's ours that we created. And I think we have to trust ourselves more in that, right? Like with you, you've, you've done so much and if you've done so much and Gabby, you're just on the precipice of, you know, building this super authentic business. And you've been really good at leaning into that.
01:24:32
Speaker
And we have to trust that we really do know what we're doing. And if we don't know, we have to trust that we're going to be led. you know,
Balancing Control and Seeking Help
01:24:40
Speaker
to take that next right step and do the next right thing for our business. And just think of it as really an extension of ourselves. And that's why when you bring the wrong person into it, it just is can take on a different energy or go in a different direction than you really would have gone, you know, so you can't, you don't want to outsource too much because you're always risking that. I think no matter what.
01:25:05
Speaker
There's also a flow there too, though, because we do also, as we grow, want to not control everything and we want to ask for help and we want to, i think. stay by staying in our authenticity and staying in our zone of genius and recognizing when things need to shift. And like for you, Marty, like recognizing like, okay, when I go out and teach classes at beauty schools and connect with these other estheticians that actually should come from me, but I can also offload some of my other tasks to my team because I have a team and trust them that it's, you know, done is better than none. And you know, a different way of doing things can still be an amazing outcome.
01:25:44
Speaker
Absolutely. Yeah.
01:25:49
Speaker
Is there anything else that anyone wants to add before we wrap up? Anything you'd want to say to anyone who might be hanging out with us today?
01:26:00
Speaker
I like the trust ourselves more.
01:26:04
Speaker
I like that a lot. I've just been writing little like notes I always do with our masterminds and just... It's nice it's to like to revisit when you just need like a little pick-me-up one day or you start to doubt yourself or you're just needing something to remind yourself. like I wrote that down for a reason.
01:26:26
Speaker
Yes. Yeah. It's true. It's true. I do have one thing. Yeah. yeah Um, so I, I learned this from someone else. Um, but I asked my chat GPT to, after everything it knows about me for the year of 2025, all of the work we've done together and talking, um, if I am living in my true alignment, which he, I've already talked with him about mine's a he, um, and, um,
01:26:57
Speaker
Where am I betraying myself? Ooh. What I got back was so crazy. Like I, I just try that.
01:27:09
Speaker
Was
Reflecting on Personal Growth
01:27:10
Speaker
it, was it, did you really feel like it was truth telling? was so truth telling. Ah, he It just kept going to you are like it was basically about you're always in survival mode. You're always doing too much.
01:27:25
Speaker
You're always like basically outsourcing the wrong things. um It just crazy. um you know it's re it was real some of it I was just like wait a second but I'm working on that you know was like like he says to me I'm going to give it to you real and honest and some of this is going to hurt your feelings and I was like and it absolutely did but yeah okay I need this yeah tell us that prompt one more time um So based on everything you know about me from 2025, where am I not living in alignment and betraying myself?
01:28:05
Speaker
Oh, I'm going to do it. I'm scared. I would love to know what, what it says to you guys. I'll send you mine. You know what? I found an app last night that is called best me, but let me get like the actual exact.
01:28:26
Speaker
Man, I've got lots of screenshots here. There was like so much good stuff happening on social media last night. Yeah, it's called bestme-ai.com.
01:28:37
Speaker
I'm very excited about it. I'm going to sign up. But it is like literally designed for that type of stuff. Like, I'm very excited about how they have this set up. So if you guys want to even have like a whole other, my chat GPT is kind of weird. I feel like I've got way too much going on on chat GPT. And so I was like, well, that would be really cool to have a more personal AI kind of thing going on. So I was way excited about that. But that prompt is really amazing. I think, you know what, there is something that I wanted to add that Gabby, um,
01:29:12
Speaker
You mentioned, and I saw you talk about on social media, one really good reflection practice for everybody ah whenever you get to that point, right? It could be like, i do this on New Year's, but it can be whenever you're feeling this is to go back through your camera roll. So, you know, get a blank piece of paper and write the months out and then go back through your camera roll and revisit January and write down all of the wins and kind of highlight things that happened in that month. And it's insane. to do that every year and actually really go back through your year and have that even connected with like pictures and videos and sounds and you're revisiting that. It's
Creating Mind Movies for Manifestation
01:29:53
Speaker
crazy how much we go through in a year, especially 2025. Like I'm a little scared to do my 2025, but um that is one of my favorite ways to revisit the year and really be able to reflect on it. And then you have that whole piece of paper that you're like, holy cow, and this is what happened and this is where it was at and this is what I was going through. And you know, and now here I am. It is so fun. I highly encourage people to do that.
01:30:19
Speaker
Dang. I like that. It's really cool. I'm making a mind movie. I took a class about it last year. were you You just basically into your video editor, you upload all of the things instead of a vision board, you just upload all of the pictures or videos, and then you set it to music that makes you really emotional. And you make it like three minutes long and you like every day just open it up and look at it. If it's like your kitchen remodel or your like you just put everything you can think of in there.
01:30:53
Speaker
and I love that. That's very Joe Dispenza. Yeah. Actually, he is just talking about that right now. I think he is one of the leaders in mind movies and he has this whole like business around mind movies or something.
01:31:08
Speaker
Cause that, cause with the, paired with the music and the visual part of it, ye it like grasps you. Yeah. It has to evoke emotion and it, yeah Ooh, I'm going to do that too. Man, I
Connecting with Like-minded Individuals
01:31:19
Speaker
got lots to do. Yeah.
01:31:20
Speaker
Yeah. Thank you for sharing. You have a week off and like week and a half off. Do. Yes. Do nothing. you know you know I actually have been feeling very called to just like be And then because I usually i put a lot of pressure on myself to like wrap up and just set my goals and intentions. And I'm like, you know what? No, I'm just going to flow over my time off and enjoy my time off. And then if it happens in January, they probably will. That's fine.
01:31:48
Speaker
I love it. i love it I'm so happy that we did this. Thank you guys for being so open to to doing this today. Um, I'm so deeply grateful, like Marty as connecting finally, after like seven or eight years of being in each other's awareness this year has been so fun to just meet you face to face and connect with you. And I have so much gratitude for you and I can't wait for the next year. um you know, and, and being more intentional with our relationship and, Gabby, like words cannot even express your voice is always in my head because I love your accent so much, you know, like, I just, we're so grateful for the work that we, it's been an honor to work with you through this transition in your career and achieving, you know, was like the steps that we did to get you to where you are now and supporting you through that was a really beautiful process. And we're grateful that you came into our life and,
01:32:46
Speaker
And happy to have finally have you on the pod. Yeah. Even though you didn't know it was going to happen today. I was not sure where you were going with it this morning. I was like, yeah.
01:33:00
Speaker
And really for for both of you and for Tiffany, you know, just the ability to show up. Mm-hmm. It's huge. and And being in that authenticity and that openness and just just showing up and laying it all out there, I think is really powerful. And it also, I do believe that our industry is becoming a lot more community oriented. Like we really do need each other. And our industry is growing like crazy. There's so many people coming into it. And then those of us who have been around for even a long time, we're like, no, I still need more support. still need more community.
01:33:37
Speaker
And so, yeah i think that just this space in general with our podcast, with our mastermind group, has been really, really incredible. And, and yeah, I'm just very feeling a lot of gratitude for for that.
01:33:54
Speaker
But it really does speak to finding your people. the you know, I think is going into 2026. The one thing that I could say is like, find your people, find us, find and us a support group. You know, like we have our mastermind groups. We have four spots open for January, but even just reach out to estheticians in your area, you know, meet for coffee quarterly, like do something, but find your people. And I'm telling you right now, it's not going to be in a Facebook group.
01:34:24
Speaker
No, we're talking about intentionally finding your people and, and leaning on each other. So finding those like-minded people and Tiffany and I will have, um, we're creating a membership that will be out in early 2026 so that we can bring that to more people as well. And just keep everybody connected who is, who is moving on this trajectory with us. But thank you so much to both of you for a million different reasons.
01:34:49
Speaker
Thank you
Holiday Relaxation and Self-care
01:34:50
Speaker
so much. It's been such an amazing year having you guys in my life. I have enjoyed it so much. Yeah, me too. Yeah.
01:35:01
Speaker
yeah Awesome. Okay. Well, Merry Christmas, everybody. like literally wishing everybody, you guys and, and whoever's here hanging out with us today, listening, you know, we really hope that you have the happiest of holidays, but more than anything, what I wish for people is to just like chill the hell out, you know, be present, Yeah. Chill out, clear your plate and just be really present. It's such a beautiful, magical time of the year and it doesn't need to be chaos. It doesn't need to be stressful. It's not meant to be.
01:35:33
Speaker
Our bodies are designed for winter solstice to rest and to hibernate and to be present and to not put pressure on our ourselves. So I love also that that is kind of where all of us are at right now too. And I hope that everybody listening, if you need your permission slip to chill out,
01:35:47
Speaker
Here you go. Stay present, chill out. And um yeah, just stay, stay in that chill energy. And then just allow whenever your body feels like it's ready, you know, whether that's in January or February, and your mind starts to go there, just let that flow and be what it is. But don't work against what your body is naturally telling you in the winter, which is to just rest.
01:36:09
Speaker
Yeah. Rest and find peace. So thank you so much for everybody for being here. Thank you so much to you guys. And we'll just see you in the next episode and wishing you the happiest of holidays. Okay. Bye everybody.
01:36:24
Speaker
i guys.