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Thanatomorphose (2012)
28 Plays2 months ago
Welcome back to LHOHP! This week we check out this rotten film (literally) from 2012. Also, we dive into an old world pilsner that you should definitely try. Hope you enjoy! Cheers!
Transcript
00:00:20
littlehopsofhorrors
Thank you.
00:00:41
littlehopsofhorrors
Thanks, Jack. Welcome back to Little Hubs a Horse podcast. I'm John, your host as always. Thank you again for tuning in. Thank you again for the continued support. It really does mean a lot to me. Any likes, follows, subscribes, anything. Check us out on any of our pages, ratings, all that stuff. it It really does help. I know everybody asks you for it. And I just want a free beer sponsorship, man. That's the end goal, ah even if it's just for a couple of months. Discount code, anything like that, just to make This, you know, a little hobby, ah a little more ah budget-friendly, not to say it's not now. But anyway, ah what are we what are we covering today? A fucking movie I can't pronounce. Thanetomorphous. Yep, that's what we're gonna go with. I'm not gonna try it again. It's some fucking weird ah name. I don't know what, yeah, whatever. From 2012, sitting at 4.4 on IMDb, and Rotten Tomatoes has it at a 31%.
00:01:37
littlehopsofhorrors
This movie is not well-liked, ah directed by Eric Falardo. That's what it looks like anyway. um Our score? Four and a half out of 10. Yeah, not not the greatest film. We'll definitely cover why. ah but You know what? It it might be like a five, but ah it probably closer to four and three quarters out of 10. Let's just do that. There we go. We'll split the difference there now that I'm thinking about it. um Yeah, it's it's it's a rough one ah But before we we get into what we liked and what we didn't like let's talk about the beer we're drinking today ah We're having bit burger premium pills. This is just a you know, it's a well-crafted pilsner from the motherland of you know, crispy beers um It's it's crisp. I know I just kind of said that but
00:02:29
littlehopsofhorrors
It's like it's a crispy boy. It's supposed to be crisp. That's why they have the fucking term, ah but it's refreshing You know it's got a little bit of like a grainy kind of bready barnyard II kind of flavor to it ah Easy to drink and and honestly if you haven't tried any of these like old world beers I mean these guys been brewing for fucking over 200 years ah Do yourself a favor seek them out. These breweries been doing it for a long time and and they're really good at it You know, there's a reason why they're still around and they've survived, you know countless wars and empires and all kinds of crazy shit, you know And it's still now it's just hanging out on your shelf and and you walk right by it every day And that's not fair to the beard. I think you know, you owe yo, yo, it's yourself and to those breweries You know to to try it at least once so let's take a sip
00:03:16
littlehopsofhorrors
Yeah, like I said, just nice and easy to drink, man. These these beers are are always great. We're coming to an Oktoberfest season. I can't fucking wait. We're getting closer to spooky season. like we're you know Fucking summer's almost over. I cannot be more fucking happy. I hate summer. I'm like ah i'm like a... I'm a I'm a husky guy, right? Like i'm I'm short and stout. But dude, I fucking I hate summer like it kicks my ass every year. I just like hate being hot on purpose. Like it's just terrible. I would much rather be like, if it never goes above 65 degrees ever again, I'll be I'll be happy. I'll be okay with that. ah Unfortunately, it looks like we're heading in the other direction. it worked
00:03:56
littlehopsofhorrors
You know, I don't know. Anyway, we're not talking about global warming or anything like that. Now, what did we like about this movie? Thanetomorphous. There we go. Hopefully I didn't fuck it up. um I really don't want to say that word any more than I have to. So that's probably the last time you're going to hear me address this ah by its title. Well, it's a low-budget film. and This has been making the rounds. it you know It's 12 years old? they' Yeah, 12 years old right now. um And it's been making the rounds on the horror pages. like It's just been unearthed, right? like it Maybe it's because it hit Tubi, and you know that's like horror fucking movie lover Mecca, ah because it's free, and they always have a really solid selection.
00:04:35
littlehopsofhorrors
um But you know and and um I think that has something to do with it. And a lot of the lot of the horror pages have been talking about like you know this this is a great body horror. right So like if if you can stomach stuff like that, you know give it a chance. you you know It's worth it and all that stuff. and I mean the the practical effects are really good right in in the fact I like the concept you know where there's like you know you could unwillingly contract contract like some sort of like life-ending virus like that's pretty fucking scary really you don't have any control over it now we'll talk about the characters decisions ah later in the movie ah you know as to what maybe things could have been a little better but whatever um but this is definitely some weird
00:05:21
littlehopsofhorrors
like art school project film kind of kind of thing right so it's like i you know and the director hasn't really done much nobody else in the movie he has ever has done much uh in you know as far as like big name horror or anything uh aside from this but maybe this will give him a little bump in in a little uh you know pushing the right direction i didn't look to see who did the special effects and everything but they have some talent because there was some really good um Really good body stuff um What we didn't like alright, so this is an uncomfortable watch and and not not with the like in the matter or in the manner you're thinking like it's not Anytime somebody brings a body horror you know what you're getting right you know it's gonna be fucking pretty gnarly you're gonna get some some uncomfortable scenes if you're squeamish with this stuff and don't fucking watch it man like I don't you know that this is just not for you um I personally always enjoy the special effects aspect of this stuff like I want somebody to gross me out I want somebody to be so good with a special effects that I'm like oh alright like that got me actually a buddy of mine
00:06:25
littlehopsofhorrors
um he watched this because I told him about it and he said it made him gag. Now this guy's got a pretty high threshold so I was very like that's why we're reviewing this now is because I watched it and said fuck it let's just talk about it whatever on the podcast. So there you go Drew there's your shout out. He's a listener and probably like my I would say arguably my biggest fan. So thank you again for the support buddy. um you know i always look forward to to bullshitting with you about this and uh yeah so anyway but back to the movie what we didn't like um the acting is fucking atrocious it's fucking it's it's garbage uh the interactions between the characters at times that the the
00:07:05
littlehopsofhorrors
just this the movie itself like it's just uncomfortable i don't want to watch this the dialogue you know everything basically the entire movie aside from the gore is pretty shit right there's just no point to it i don't really like what i'm watching i'm just suffering through it to get to the payoff right and that's that's ultimately what you want in most horror movies if if it's not good right you're like well there's got to be some redeeming quality here And in this one, it just happens to be a lot of over the top court, right? So um yeah, without further ado, if you guys haven't watched this movie, I'm assuming moment many of you have not. um If you want to hear me you know tear this movie apart and then praise some special effects, you know hang out with me for a little bit. If not, come back around the eight minute mark and we're going to we're gonna jump into spoilers. So without further ado, here we go.
00:08:01
littlehopsofhorrors
that's right it's spoiler time guys uh yeah so this this is like the kind of movie that somebody would take in hopes of like this will make them a star right like in exchange for them to just be naked the entire time literally the entire movie she does not she's out of clothes more than she's in close she's briefly in and and i didn't even look up in the actresses name i think it's like kelly something would give me one minute and i'll look it up right now because i've been looking you know at the cast and all this other stuff uh... caden rose is her name and and again like i said nobody has really gone on to anything crazy um after this but she is naked the entire fucking movie uh... and obviously part of that is to show off like the uh...
00:08:50
littlehopsofhorrors
Like the makeup and everything and the special effects of like the rot setting in because that's basically what happens in this movie, right? She gets some kind of disease and she rots from the inside out and they never explain where it comes from I think I heard something about a dog at one point But again, they didn't and they double back in this weird dream sequence. This movie is all fucking over the place. Uh, they try So hard to to be this like cool and and It could have been cool. right They just took it like too far. It's like the guy, the director, got a little too you know full of himself and just pushed it that next step that he shouldn't have done. But there were some cool takeaways. like I like the intro with the violin. I like the you know the outro with the violin. I like the you know the graphics on the screen when when they talk about different sections of the movie. you know I liked that. I thought that was cool, you know kind of art, healthy, kind of fun. ah But then he gets so fucking weird
00:09:45
littlehopsofhorrors
uh with these like really bright strobe colorful aggressive music uh like portions of the movie that that that that he puts in here and for some reason uh also literally they they don't add anything to the movie they're just there uh maybe if you sit down and talk to him he could tell you why but um i you know whatever uh not a lot of the budget was spent on the wardrobe because there's just nobody i have a note here 10 minutes into the movie before somebody puts clothes on so like don't watch this around you know i don't know people that can't handle that kind of thing or if it's like a first date or like an early on date and in that kind of stuff makes people uncomfortable uh i don't know this is this movie's just not going to be for everybody uh but there's you know there's early signs you know they they don't take
00:10:38
littlehopsofhorrors
too long to let you know something's going on with Laura. right She's got like bruises in her hairs like starting to fall off and like her nail falls off. And then that's that's that's it for a long time. right ah You can tell the director's big on sound, right so there's a lot of that where they really emphasize there's a scene when she's like making breakfast right and really focusing on the bacon cooking and the eggs. and just that like That's like the stuff that's really going to gross people out when when they they see what's happening on the screen coupled with the really in your face um like noises that they focus on and everything. So I could see why people would get really grossed out by this.
00:11:16
littlehopsofhorrors
um I just, you know, I don't know, it just didn't do much for me. ah But you can, you definitely have to suffer through, we talked about kavin Cabin Fever earlier ah this year, and mainly the dialogue between it, like it just felt like amateur hour, you know, there's just, there's really some like empty scenes that just have no meaning to the movie. it's just like we have to fill an hour and a half let's just put four people in a room and have them drink beer and make out and talk about adult things ah there's just there's no substance you know there's no it doesn't it's it's just there taking up space
00:11:54
littlehopsofhorrors
uh but you know you kind of figure out that that's that's not what you're here for you keep hearing about this body of horror so you push through and everything and aside from the full frontal nudity for almost the first 35 minutes because that's what you got there's a lot of nudity in this movie um i have it here minute 36 laura wakes up and she's puking and uh she pukes all over her boyfriend or whatever he is in bed um and the bruiser is really starting to set in now so so things are starting to get um you know, a little more intense. And and now the the symptoms progress. She gets, you know, more and more ah sick as the day the days go on. they They kind of dwell on this stuff a little longer than they should. ah One of my gripes about this is that they should have accelerated um this this this virus a little a little more than they did.
00:12:45
littlehopsofhorrors
um You know, there was an interaction at the party where Laura has like a mini hookup with one of their mutual friends, Julian, and he stops by. I can't remember if she called him or if he just stops by. And she's she's a very ah free spirit, so to speak, and offers to give him a blowjob. right in the middle of the living room and uh this is when you start to realize things are going wrong for her uh as he's he's doing the gentlemanly thing and holding her hair he also sticks his finger into her fucking skull uh so so this is this is really progressing here uh and then it's just a really uncomfortable fucking scene because like that doesn't stop him right he's like oh i got my finger in this girl's brain better uh
00:13:33
littlehopsofhorrors
maybe tell her about it or no I should I should finish I should let her finish and that's what he does and it doesn't help her it doesn't say anything just just runs out the fucking door and she spits his load all over the like they show all of this stuff right it's pretty fucking graphic uh and pretty forward um then pretty much nothing happens for another 15 minutes minute 51 we're still waiting for something major to happen besides what we just you know what we just saw uh you know she kind of loses control of her bowels uh right in the middle of the hallway they show that
00:14:06
littlehopsofhorrors
Why? I don't know. And then it cuts to this weird, trippy dream sequence where there's two dudes in a jail cell fighting over, I think, lady parts? I think? I don't know. like i I couldn't make it out because, again, this movie jumps around. it goes it's It's so odd. um and And they're naked and their wieners are just flopping around. like I don't know why that's necessary. Why do I have to see this? Now, I did talk about um that the wiener, and the boob ratio being off in horror movies. And even you you do see a lot of wiener in this, you see way more boobs. So again, that that is still in favor of the boob. I don't really know where I was going with that. But it finally feels like we're starting to like, you know she wakes up ah after this weird dream sequence and the disease has pretty much taken over ah most of her body, right? yeah her
00:14:58
littlehopsofhorrors
body is beginning to fall apart. Now, it finally feels like we're starting to get somewhere. We're we're getting towards this end goal of seeing this like horrific body horror that everybody's talking about, right? And ah this this always kind of grossed me out like the idea of like bed sores, and and that's basically what they look like initially, but our body's just covered in that, right? So imagine that, but time's like a thousand, and that's what we're dealing with here. um And then you know, the blood is stained from the pus and the blood and and God knows what else but You know homegirl she still has needs, you know It's that's not enough even though her body's falling apart and everything and she feels like shit. I'm sure ah Not enough to call that the you know the hospital or or call hospital all the call somebody to take her to the hospital if she can't drive ah no, so she lays in in bed and inflicts her bean and and and and you know bloods just just squirting out of there and it's totally normal nothing nothing stops her you know she can't can't dampen her spirit with you know just a little old virus like this your body rotting from the inside out it's literally falling apart her body is falling apart and ah instead of
00:16:06
littlehopsofhorrors
you know, going to the hospital or calling an ambulance or calling a friend, she just wraps herself in toilet paper. You know, that's, um you know, she had a fucking finger fall off. And and instead of going to the hospital, like maybe that's like, where's the line for her? I don't think she has a line. I just don't, I think she's just whatever, because she's like a failing artist or she's just an aspiring artist or whatever. And she's trying to get this to go. this thing to work so she takes her finger she puts it in a fucking mason jar takes a picture over the Polaroid picture what are you fucking doing man ah Jesus Christ i'm I'm really trying to like not get mad at this movie because it was kind of a wasted time so we're trying to have as much fun with this review as we possibly can there's not a lot of substance here so it's just like
00:16:50
littlehopsofhorrors
Let's just talk about the crazy shit that happened. ah Minute 71, I have in my notes here. ah Female Freddy Krueger is finger-banging herself again, because this happens a lot, ah to the thought of beating her boyfriend to death with a hammer. um And that actually happened. He's just dead in the living room. She just beats the fuck out, you know, smashes the back of his, no, the front of his face in with a hammer. um And yeah, it's it's just it's just really trippy and out there and just whatever. They do show that um pretty good. You know what? at At times, this movie did remind me of Terrifier, like the lighting, um some of the angles, some of the shots. I wonder if any, if Damien was influenced by a movie like this at all, because some of the stuff is like Terrifier level gore, right? Like they're really harping on, you know, smacking this dude's face with a hammer, and they they show blow after blow after blow, and it felt very similar to what you'd see in like a Terrifier.
00:17:48
littlehopsofhorrors
um but she's one resilient lady you know i gotta give it to her as this disease progresses ah her arm fucking snaps at like the joint and there's maggots in the wound uh and is this enough to get her to go to the hospital no uh she grabs duct tape so uh i i'm kind of done feeling bad for her um and then this part kind of reminded me of stop motion which we watched earlier this year um she she's working on a sculpture as you know i mentioned earlier she's an artist and uh she's using the the skin or the eyes and the teeth and whatever any body parts or whatever she can from her boyfriend her dead boyfriend and she's putting it on her uh sculpture is is like part of the head uh so it's kind of it's kind of weird honestly though she has like a hell of a show and tell
00:18:37
littlehopsofhorrors
You know a hell of a lineup for something like that like, you know, our body's falling apart She's throwing anything in a fucking mason jar her ear fucking fingernails Fingers just whatever it's and anything that falls off She's preserving in some kind of alcohol and I guess she doesn't feel any pain because you don't hear when it happens. She's just like oh Better get more tape Like there's just no reaction from her. and So I don't know what the fuck disease this is ah It's pretty brutal. Also again. She's still naked by the way um and she kind of looks like a
00:19:11
littlehopsofhorrors
This is gonna sound terrible for fucking saying this. um You guys ever been in like a barbecue where there's like like yeah like like smoked pork butt or something? That's kinda what the makeup makes her look like. so And then as it progresses even more, it looks like that, but with like a really red barbecue sauce on her. um So my fat ass is just kind of getting hungry. I know that sounds fucking terrible But like if you guys watch it and you see it in the certain certain scenes You'll be like yeah, I get it like I get it kind of just looks like you know barbecue pig I don't know ah walking around ah anyway. Yeah, so um and Sorry about that side note, but it's true I you know I hope I'm not the only one that saw her looking like a fucking you know something from a barbecue joint and
00:19:56
littlehopsofhorrors
I am not a cannibal. I, you know, I feel like I have to say that now. And I have no desire to try anything like that, but it's just, you know, that's what you look like. I don't have a fat kid. I would, maybe because I didn't eat lunch yet too. I don't know. I was i was kind of hungry. um Anyway, so on top of all this, you know, the maggots are pretty much, you know, made a home in her body. She, she takes time. um They really focus on this, you know, her plucking it out of her wound. There's the sound with everything she does. They really focus on that. Like I said, um And eventually she just doesn't give a fuck about the maggots anymore and and you can see this disease is pretty much You know, she's barely living at this point um Her eyes are gone um And and I kind of wonder how like random like how Julian is feeling ah if any of this is getting him ah but apparently not minute 82
00:20:47
littlehopsofhorrors
After yet another weird student cutscene, she calls Julian back. um That's the B.J. recipient. And as he walks into this disaster of a fucking house, like I cannot imagine, there's blood and shit and piss and dead body and and just her body falling apart. I can't imagine what that would smell like, like ugh. And the first thing she says, fuck me. all this shit and he says and I shit you know and his first thing he says well that's enough of this we'll take you to the hospital now oh finally finally it's okay julian not the time when you fucking shove your finger in the back of her head like three days three days ago or whatever it was
00:21:33
littlehopsofhorrors
You had to wait till there's like maggots crawling out of her wounds and her body parts that start falling off before you finally be like yeah I guess we could take you to the hospital now right now She doesn't want to go though. She says I want you to fuck me and she just keeps saying that and tries pulling her you know um You know on to her and all this stuff. He tries pulling her out of bed to like get her and the skin on her hand slid right off like it was like a glove and ah That was kind of a gross fucking ah scene, but she gets mad that he won't dick her down, right? Like, you know, she's like, am I just a cheap fuck? Is that why no one loves me? Is that, you know, is that all I am? Like, she's got some major issues here.
00:22:15
littlehopsofhorrors
ah So she stabs him to death, um but at least at this point she has covered herself in toilet paper pretty much entirely. She kind of looks like a ah bloody mummy and um yeah, stabs him to death. ah She keeps throwing her hissy fit where she's mad at everything. um and and And the final days are upon us, right? She knocks over the scop the sculpture that she worked so hard on. The rest of her body parts art exhibit is is' now on the floor. She doesn't really care. ah But the ending does kind of drag a little bit here these last few minutes. It feels like they just keep showing the same scene over and over again. Like I get it. She's rotting. You don't have to keep like doing this slow motion of her getting out of the bathtub and like I don't care.
00:23:02
littlehopsofhorrors
ah But we're there. We finally made it. Minute 91. The virus or whatever has finally done its job. And aside from the four minutes or so of army crawling, ah the payoff is pretty fucking good. um
00:23:20
littlehopsofhorrors
I mean, in real time, you you get to see the flesh melt off of her bone. And she's still alive, right? like she just It's not like she dies. like She's trying to crawl, and you see the flesh drip from the bone onto the floor, into this like puddle. right So she just kind of like, just, I don't even know, melts away. That's that's what it looks like. and And the practical effects are pretty fucking good. um and it looks like that's where all of the you know the budget went was probably just for all this shit because it wasn't in any other part of the movie uh but she's resilient till the very end uh she's literally a skeleton sitting in a flesh you know like soup kind of thing uh and she's screaming until her jaw falls off and then that's it and she dies um i guess and the camera focuses on this steaming pile of death soup flesh shit um i mean i guess that's
00:24:16
littlehopsofhorrors
the virus one i guess so you know that was a pretty cool way to go i guess we're gonna throw it in there it's our uh yeah i mean it's not a traditional one it's not like something stabbed them but this you know this was the long game i guess uh for a virus uh to get the kill of the week so yeah it'll definitely make it it reminded me a little bit of that movie contracted uh but that was way better and uh Yeah, maybe it influenced something like this, or was influenced by something like this. There we go. ah But yeah, that that was it. Final thoughts. um Like I said, it's been making the rounds about how great of a body horror this is, and and it's not bad um in that aspect. The rest of the movie's pretty shit.
00:25:00
littlehopsofhorrors
um you know, what you have to sit through to get to that ending payoff of of all that stuff. Sucks, is it worth the watch? and I don't know, you have to be into this kind of thing for that to be worth the watch. um I mean, there are worse things out there to, you know, to check out, so I would suggest, you know, don know give it. give it like a half hour or not actually uh 30 hold on we have it here 36 minutes is when shit finally starts going so i mean you can just fast forward to that part and save yourself fucking a half hour of literally nothing but naked shit and like aggressive sex it's weird
00:25:35
littlehopsofhorrors
unless you're into that kind of thing then fucking by all means go check out the whole movie and ah Yeah, check out our socials. I'm gonna tie that in there real quick. ah Check out our socials Go give us a like rating review share our shit fucking follow us tell your friends about us Even if they don't like horror movies or beer. I don't care to Tell them give me give me some likes man. I want that free beer Or at least like a discount code. I can drop you guys and until next week
00:26:03
littlehopsofhorrors
I don't know what I'm doing yet. I still don't know what movie. Cause this one kind of caught me by surprise. I should do like a better movie cause the past couple have been like, eh. So I should try to find like a banger for you guys. Maybe we'll do something cool. I'll throw up a post on Instagram. Go follow us on Instagram and we'll try to get something together for you. But until next week, you guys stay safe and cheers.