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Faith Between Seasons: Trusting God When Nothing is Certain
44 Plays3 months ago
Happy New Year, United Not Uniform Community!
If you’re in a season where nothing feels certain and trusting God feels especially hard, this episode is for you. Today, I’m sharing honestly about my own journey of life transitions and what it looks like to hold onto faith in the midst of it. I will share how I have been wrestling, my questions, the challenges of waiting, and the quiet ways God has met me.
You’re not alone. I believe by sharing my journey while in the waiting, that you may be encouraged as well. Let's do this together.
To learn more about United Not Uniform, check out unitednotuniform.com!
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Transcript
Intro
Introduction and Series Break
00:00:47
Krystal Thomas
Hi, everyone. This is actually the first podcast episode I'm recording in 2026. I wanted to take a break from the Not What You Thought series to share an important life update. Yeah.
00:01:02
Krystal Thomas
Yeah.
Sharing Testimonies and Encouragement
00:01:04
Krystal Thomas
In full transparency, I wanted to share... this life update from a place of everything being resolved and worked out from the mountaintop as opposed to like coming out of the valley. But I do think that there is power in our testimonies as they are and where we are. my hope is that by sharing this journey while I'm in the midst of it, others of you who the Lord may be calling to take a step out in faith or try something new or deviate from the plans or the hopes that you had, that you may also be encouraged and know that our God is good for it, that he's trustworthy, that he's faithful.
00:01:48
Krystal Thomas
But that also for those who may have already taken that step and are in a similar place like I am, that you find comfort in knowing that you're not alone. yeah, yeah.
Leaving Ministry Position: Uncertainty and Fear
00:01:59
Krystal Thomas
So, for those of you who do not know, I left my, ministry position, at my local church in October, the end of October, 2025. Now, leaving, roles out of, of, ministry, that's not,
00:02:17
Krystal Thomas
unusual or different in any way. But it was the first time that the Lord had called me out of a position without being clear as to what was next or having another job lined up. Now, for those of you who are in the US or have been aware of what's happening in the United States, 2025 was a really rough year.
00:02:38
Krystal Thomas
We had a lot of people, there was lot of fear, a lot of violence, a lot of turmoil, a lot of people losing jobs overnight. And so part of the role that I had in ministry was that I had the privilege and the honor to sit with people who were facing a lot of these crises, facing a lot of these questions when life felt so uncertain.
00:02:59
Krystal Thomas
And
00:03:01
Krystal Thomas
when the Lord put on my heart that it was time to leave this role, felt that It felt like I was taking advantage of a gift when there were so many other people that didn't have the option the choice or even the knowledge that they were going to lose their job overnight. And so I felt really silly. also felt guilty. It's crazy, the emotions that we feel. But to have witnessed so many people grapple wrestle with life being turned upside down, felt like I was willingly choosing to do that. And that felt a bit strange and a bit odd.
00:03:39
Krystal Thomas
But in hindsight, I realize and I know that when the Lord calls us out to do something, it's not about our understanding. It's not about, our plans or comfort. It's about trusting in him and trusting in what he has, and believing him for it.
Feeling Called Beyond Current Role
00:03:56
Krystal Thomas
yeah. And so, the conversation about why I started couple of years ago.
00:04:06
Krystal Thomas
found myself, Yeah, I love the work that I got to loved building up the collective church. I loved how we're learning how to be unified body, a unified body in Christ with all of the diversity and different experiences and perspectives. But I also knew that the Lord was calling me to do more, more with this ministry, but also just more in a local level. And I knew that there was also a pastoral call in my life. And I had been meeting with my pastors who were super supportive and loving and kind.
00:04:38
Krystal Thomas
But I just found that there wasn't, it was just hard to, it felt like I was trying force against the mold a little bit. Yeah. in trying to pursue some of these things that the Lord was calling me into.
Mentorship and Decision to Leave
00:04:49
Krystal Thomas
And after I had been mentored by the executive pastor, he was really, were meeting lot to talk about, okay, well, what's next? What does this look like?
00:04:59
Krystal Thomas
It was kind of shocking how we both came to conclusion of like, wow, this might not be at this church anymore. The Lord seems like he's calling you out of this role.
00:05:09
Krystal Thomas
And it felt like a gut punch because I'm sitting here and did I just like talk myself out of a job? What am I going to do? Like all these other things. And my flesh very quickly wanted to walk it back and try to make it work. But I knew deep down, like the Lord had already been placing it in my heart that it was time to leave. There was just a lot of fear. A lot of, you know, like I have finances, there are like debts I'm still trying to pay off. And so it was just really scary. The idea of leaving, not knowing what's next, knowing that I also wasn't in the most secure place
Financial Fears and Assurance
00:05:40
Krystal Thomas
to do so. You know, I've had friends who like stewarded their resources well. and we're able to live off of savings for like six months to a year. Right.
00:05:50
Krystal Thomas
was not in that position. And so it was a very real thing of, okay, Lord, I know that you're calling me out. I know that it is time. but I'm scared and I don't know how this is going to look or what this is going to look like.
00:06:03
Krystal Thomas
in his mercy and in his kindness, uh, sorry guys, I feel like this journey is all over the place. The Lord put it on my heart to share, this part of my, my story this morning. so I haven't had time to make notes. So it's coming right from the heart. So bear with me.
Voice of the Prophets Conference
00:06:21
Krystal Thomas
So earlier that year, I had the opportunity to go to a conference known as Voice of the Prophets, and I was invited by a very dear friend And it was, it was just such a joy and a delight. It was also kind of scary because I had never really gone to anything outside of my own church that talked about the prophetic.
00:06:42
Krystal Thomas
And went to this conference and it was really transformative. might have to bring her on here. We can talk about our experiences there, but I got a lot of clarity, especially when it came to not only how the Lord speaks to me, but also the sensitivity that I have, especially when engaging with others. several people up to me and they were like, you're going to leave your position.
00:07:05
Krystal Thomas
And now this is back in April. And I'm like, y'all don't know me like that. Like, what mean? Like, what you mean? And I think that there was like little bit of comfort in knowing that like, okay, this isn't working opposed to it. Like, like trying all these other ways to make it work, ways to, to be at peace, ways to feel like I could be obedient to the Lord without not doing my full duty as someone working on church staff.
00:07:35
Krystal Thomas
And just to have complete strangers like come up to me out of nowhere and say like, you know, your time is winding down. the Lord's calling you out of that position. And I was like, okay. You know, you kind of like put it in the back of your mind. was new. I was newer to the prophetic, so y'all forgive me. And so then when this conversation happened, was like, okay. I was like the Lord and his loving and kindness had warned me earlier. And so there was a peace, but there was also a lot of fear.
00:08:03
Krystal Thomas
And so now it was a time of, okay, how am I going to let people know? Like, how are transitioning responsibilities? What does that look like? All this other kind of stuff.
Official Departure and Emotional Realization
00:08:11
Krystal Thomas
And of course, like God made a way and provision and it all happened in the way that it was supposed to. was, it was informed to the larger congregation that I was transitioning. was a whole, service ceremony. and then I was like, okay, I'm done. I'm off staff.
00:08:28
Krystal Thomas
And I remember the last day I
00:08:35
Krystal Thomas
It didn't feel real until the ceremony and then until the last day because was off on Friday, so my last day was that Thursday.
00:08:46
Krystal Thomas
And people were like, we'll see you Sunday. And I'm like, I mean, you can see me on Sunday, but just not in the same role. And kind of hit me that this was the role the Lord called me out of corporate to be in.
00:09:00
Krystal Thomas
It was the first ministry job I had in the church that I came to Christ in, right? There was a lot of history, lot of journeying, a lot of service. it felt like I was leaving home, right? And so, yeah. And so I like, you know, it's just in between and people were asking if I was leaving or what I was gonna do.
00:09:29
Krystal Thomas
I know that the Lord put on my heart that I would be working another ministry capacity. I knew that, especially with United Not Uniform, which I love this ministry, we're still very much in our infancy stage. It's not ready to be the sole source of income yet, right? And I didn't want to try to rush this ministry and make it into something that it wasn't out of fear and be disobedience to the Lord.
00:09:57
Krystal Thomas
And so I remember coming back Sunday after I had left staff and it really felt like an, like I was visiting a whole brand new church. It was as if, without my assignment or my role, Yeah, it was so weird. It was like it was the church that I had served at, but it wasn't. It was a lot of like quick hellos, a lot of people rushing to do stuff. And again, it's like I came during second service, which we typically have a whole bunch of new people.
00:10:34
Krystal Thomas
Which made sense as to why there were a lot of new faces and a lot of new people. But it was just also realizing that the Lord was winding down a particular season of my life. That was just really hard wrestle with and grieve and to accept at the same time. It just felt like I was just losing a lot, not knowing what was next or what was to come, but knowing that it was what the Lord called me to do. So was like, let me go. visit other churches. I was blessed enough that my church was able to provide with
00:11:09
Krystal Thomas
like so I could take a sabbatical. So I was able to receive money through the end of December. And that was just such a gift because I didn't have to stress right away of how I was going to eat, how I was going
Sabbatical Reflections and New Routine
00:11:22
Krystal Thomas
to pay bills. They were just so kind and so loving in that way. And so that did alleviate some pressure. But I found myself, especially that first week, so lost,
00:11:35
Krystal Thomas
it seems so silly because I'm like, here I am, you know, I'm in seminary. I know the goodness of God. I've witnessed him in so many ways. I've seen him work miracles. I've seen that even in the midst of this, of 2025, how he has come through for so many people and has been so good. even for me too, right? And here I was feeling like,
00:12:03
Krystal Thomas
okay, now there's not a job to do. Now there's not people to take care of. I'm actually the person that needs to be taken care of. And, for those of you who,
00:12:16
Krystal Thomas
I'm not claiming this over my life, but I noticed, especially during the winter, that seasonal depression is a very real thing. And so the idea of even transitioning out of this position during a time of year that already typically can be a bit harder for me and not have a routine was just really scary on top of it too. Yeah.
00:12:37
Krystal Thomas
And so was like, okay, well, who am when people don't need me? Who am I when I'm not fulfilling a role? And there was just a lot of silence. There was a lot of quiet. And I think that was just also really hard to wrestle with too in realizing, okay, not only is this the end of an era, era, sorry, before coffee, y'all, but that
00:13:02
Krystal Thomas
a lot of my role in my assignment was on what I did as opposed to friendships or relationships. again, life is life and people have life.
00:13:14
Krystal Thomas
People have things to do. not taking it personal, but I think it was just very eyeopening in that time, of how something had been, had taken up so much of my life, how quickly,
00:13:29
Krystal Thomas
it felt everyone else moved on and I was just kind of like in the stuck spot. And so, yeah, it was a lot of wrestling, a lot of like frustration with God. I found myself trying to stay busy, trying to like do all these things. And whenever I prayed about it, Lord's like, this is a gift. I'm giving you a gift. I'm giving you time of sabbatical time of rest where you were going to be provided for. and it's just so funny how,
00:13:56
Krystal Thomas
when things don't look how we had hoped, I realized like, wow, like how quickly I want to go back to control, how quickly want to, fill my time with things, but I don't have anything to do. Right. And so it was just, it was a very interesting time. and I don't think I was fully honest with the amount of lament. I still had lot of sadness, a lot of processing, not only that year, but the last couple of years.
00:14:24
Krystal Thomas
While also navigating, you know, it was a big decision to like leave without having the next job lined up. And so I know my parents were very nervous. My father was a little bit nervous. My mom, she was calmer than I was. I was like, thank you, mom, for your faith.
00:14:43
Krystal Thomas
I remember telling her at my at home at the kitchen, And she just had this biggest smile on her face when I told her. And I was like, I think the Lord had already told you something too.
00:14:58
Krystal Thomas
And both of my parents have been extremely supportive during this time. my sister, of course, too. It's just, it had,
00:15:09
Krystal Thomas
it's a bit strange for a 35 year old to leave her job and not have anything else lined up. and so after the first two weeks of wrestling and fighting against the season that I was very clearly in and the emotions I needed to address, the sadness that I was feeling,
00:15:27
Krystal Thomas
I finally started to get into a routine of, okay, what does it look like now? How do build routines now in my life? How do savor this time of rest while learning how to let go release the things that are no longer mine to carry? Some of the things I wasn't supposed to be carrying at all while still trusting in the Lord's sovereignty and his goodness in the midst of all of it.
Inspiration for Poetry Book
00:15:49
Krystal Thomas
As I was in the middle of November, the Lord put on my heart to, it had been for some time of putting together, a poetry book. Now I had been part of this writing club and it was a great opportunity where you got to meet with publishers, do your pitch. I had been member for several years, but this was the first time I had a book idea already. did the webinar, I was ready. And for some reason, I completely mixed up the dates Now, before I would be like, oh, I'm just like being very forgetful.
00:16:20
Krystal Thomas
But in hindsight, I realized like that wasn't the path that the Lord had for me.
00:16:24
Krystal Thomas
And having to also reconcile with that, because again, other plans that I thought were going to pan out. We're not panning out and having to like grieve that. And so anyway, the Lord was still like all the feels. The Lord was like, well, you still have this book. And even if you haven't met with publishers, even if you haven't, you don't know how this book is going be used, let's put it together. And so I had gone to a writing conference earlier that year and got some pointers from some people who have published so many books. I was like, you post all these books. It's amazing. It's like, you're writing a book like every week. and, uh,
00:17:02
Krystal Thomas
Yeah. The first book, uh, I say first book. Okay. All right, Lord. Uh, it was a book of poetry. So there a book that consists of poems that I have been writing with the Lord over the last three years, about the journey of lament, and grief and hope and, how it's not always linear. But it was in those prayers where I was crying out to the Lord and I was spending time with him I not only was able to find peace and comfort joy in the relationship I have with him, to also know more about God, know more about myself.
00:17:41
Krystal Thomas
and to have more joy than I could ever imagine. And so it was beautiful going through some of these poems. I love, I love it. How there'll be, for those of you who don't journal, please journal, because rereading those old words of where you were and how the Lord showed up Or even old prayers that you've had that you've stopped praying for. just like there's something about reminiscing and remembering not only where you were and where you have come from, but who God is. in your life and in your story. And so as I'm reading these poems, see all the ways in which the Lord has shown up for me in the past, which it's giving me courage for the season that I'm in now.
00:18:22
Krystal Thomas
And I finished the book the end of November. was in a very rough draft, but the poems were there. this time, I found myself, I would wake up and write poetry with the Lord. which resulted in the creation of the newsletter, which we'll be starting back up in February, where every other week I send a newsletter that has a poem that I wrote and a devotional that you can, or a reflection and prayer to get you through midweek.
00:18:52
Krystal Thomas
But just again, that reminder of a such a sweet time with the Lord, where it was like every day we were writing, every day there were new, poems and reassurances and comforts that only he could provide. and to, it was like, man, I'm just going to be emotional in this and that's okay. But it's like waking up and I'm so afraid because I have no idea. have no idea things are going to look. I have no idea. Like, it's like one of the few times I'm not, I don't have a job. Like,
00:19:25
Krystal Thomas
And it's just like terrifying, right? And so to have those poems and to reread them and to reread even like how faithful not only the Lord is, but how assured I had been that the Lord was going to move, gave me the courage to do so and to move forward. Yeah.
00:19:43
Krystal Thomas
day by day and to savor this time, even though was uncomfortable, even though there were a lot of tears and there were a lot of feelings, that it was all necessary.
00:19:53
Krystal Thomas
will say like now going into December and during this time, gave me the opportunity to invest more in my local community. The church that I had served at was in another area. And so I often found myself commuting back and forth.
00:20:08
Krystal Thomas
And now it's like, okay, well, don't have to go into the city that often. Let me get to know the place in which I've been planted. it's been very sweet to get to know my neighbors, to develop a routine, to support local businesses. Again, being able to still
00:20:25
Krystal Thomas
be able to have experiences, be able to still do things, to have financial provision in a time where you know, I, you know, without a job, I don't take lightly. And I always had everything that I
Community Connections and Support
00:20:37
Krystal Thomas
need. There was some discomfort. There was having to say no to a couple of things. There was also having to confront moments of poor stewardship and the need to have more of a safety blanket, right? But ultimately,
00:20:53
Krystal Thomas
The main part and point is, see, I fall into it so quickly of making plans and have provision, is that the Lord was showing me who he was and how I was being cared for.
00:21:05
Krystal Thomas
so we're in December. I'm like getting used to this, like no work life. I was like, okay, this is cool. and, uh, the book has been written. I've sent it to a couple of people. I'm meeting with mentors. I'm meeting with different people and kind of figure out, okay, what's next. Lord had been very clear with this role that I had at the church. I had, that's a whole other journey. the, the transition even into working in ministry after working a corporate job, I knew that the Lord had called me out of that position I had been for some time. And had applied to like so many other jobs.
00:21:38
Krystal Thomas
And it was like to the point where I was getting rejection letters and Maybe, let me phrase it differently. Not rejection letters. I was getting like not, we went with a different candidate letters. From jobs that like typically don't even respond, it was just like such an apparent like stop doing what you're doing.
00:21:56
Krystal Thomas
and so that when, uh, the Lord had kept pressing into my heart, it's like, you're looking at job that's going to pay you the most. You're looking at, money as the main motivator, as opposed being aligned with my will.
00:22:11
Krystal Thomas
And so was during the pandemic and I remember would walk in the morning during one of the meeting calls and would always be able to see the sun coming up through the mountains back in West Virginia. And remember being on top of the hill and had gotten an email about job that was perfect for me and it was a job that I had just left. and it had just been very clear where the Lord had wanted me to go. was still hard because it was not what I was expecting, and it did require lot of surrender because it felt like even for my parents, they were okay, you're going to leave a corporate job where they're offering you more money. You could be making six figures to take a pay cut to work at a local church.
00:23:01
Krystal Thomas
And I'm smiling so big right now because I took the job and it transformed my life. But even after, even taking the job and leaving the environment that I was in, in my last job, there was just an ease and a lightness that I felt. But I was also able to accomplish so much that it didn't, like it was only but God. Like I was able to purchase this home And, even with the bank, they were all like, okay, well, you left your corporate job. You're working for a church. Like what's going on? Like buyers might be little anxious and nervous. and how, uh, the Lord had been so faithful and giving me a home. Right. And, again, a reminder of like trusting in him,
00:23:49
Krystal Thomas
trusting in his character and trusting who he is, that he would have me. It doesn't mean that everything will go out the way that I had hoped or planned. You know, there were some struggles with like the home buying process.
00:24:02
Krystal Thomas
wasn't all easy breezy, but it was just very clear that there was favor and that when I found this home, that it would be mine. And so now in December, you know, I'm having these conversations with different people and I'm thinking, oh, Lord's prepared me to work in this other church. Like I'm like already kind of resigned. We're like, that's where I want to be.
00:24:24
Krystal Thomas
And like the more and more like I'm engaging and like, actually, I don't think that this is where the Lord is planning me at all. And like having to like relinquish that dream,
00:24:37
Krystal Thomas
And also grieve again. was a lot of grieving because it's like, okay, Lord, I'm trusting you. I still don't know what's next. This month is going to be the last month I get a paycheck. What am I going to do? I'm just having lot of fear. had sprained my finger at that time. doing like nothing extraordinary or anything, which is also crazy. So I had like a split and everything. I'm just thankful that I had still had benefits at the time. when I hurt myself again,
00:25:07
Krystal Thomas
the Lord's provision even in that, but it started to feel very scary. I also found myself developing a new level of capacity, a new level not of capacity, but of compassion for those living in the country who do not have health insurance, who do not have employment, where you are thinking about like the next paycheck, where you are thinking about can I afford this? Can I afford care? Right. it's a very real reality, unfortunately in this country.
00:25:36
Krystal Thomas
and I know even still, I cannot fully understand or relate. but I do know that it has given me a new level of compassion for those who are living on the edge, for those who want paycheck away from, from things, um, things,
00:25:54
Krystal Thomas
completely turning upside down. And so, yeah, there's a lot of, there's a lot that I can see that Lord is opening my eyes and my heart to. Even with going to a new church, I got to the point where I stopped going to church. And that's like even going into January. And not because like, trust me, I love the church. I watch services online. Like I love,
00:26:20
Krystal Thomas
when the community gets together and it is meant to be what the Lord designed it to be. But I got so tired of being new.
00:26:29
Krystal Thomas
I got so tired of being a guest. I got so tired of being the other on the outskirts of
Experiencing Church Anew
00:26:35
Krystal Thomas
conversations. And as someone who worked in hospitality and was able to lead the hospitality ministry and the ministry of presence, It is so apparent when it is not there.
00:26:52
Krystal Thomas
And even with that, it gave me a new capacity for people who maybe want to come to church and it's overwhelming, maybe want to find a church community, but they haven't found the right one. It can be very easy to want to give up. It can be very easy to want to to stop trying. and I encourage you to keep leaning in and keep trying. you will find your church home just like I will find my new church home. but I'm going through all of these emotions at the same time where I'm grieving the one that, that I had lost. And so, were so many like really beautiful churches that welcomed me in and were super hospitable, hospitable, like, um, like,
00:27:25
Krystal Thomas
St. Moses in Baltimore, Healing Hearts Worship Center, The Well. There's a lot of places that were very kind and welcoming to me as I've been in this middle space. But again, I do think that the Lord, it's very easy when you have been in a church for a really long time that you forget
00:27:48
Krystal Thomas
I don't want to say the weight, but like how scary it can be to find a new church home, what people bring or the fight for that motivation to come, right? And I think even in that, it was also beautiful to learn what it was like to experience church as opposed to run church. And I'm using church to describe Sunday service.
00:28:09
Krystal Thomas
People are the church, not, you know, I just want to make that distinction. But I had realized that I had not really experienced a Sunday service in a really long time. And so it was also nice to, to be new, to be welcomed and to be able just to receive, even if it was hard and not having like a place that felt like home yet.
00:28:32
Krystal Thomas
and so it's January, it's the last week of January and I still don't have my next job.
00:28:42
Krystal Thomas
Yeah. I don't have my next job. had the, it's kind crazy. I had I went to a New Year's Eve worship service and it was so amazing. Like the, it was at the well. Pastor Victor had been talking about the Valley of Dry Bones and Really realizing that, you know, this time of rest and this period of rest was necessary because it was reset for me and realizing what I had been carrying, what I needed to release, what I had been grieving and what I needed to heal from.
00:29:16
Krystal Thomas
And then also all the joy that came from it, the laughter celebrating my birthday the way that I wanted and being cared for in a way that I didn't know I could be and the value and the gift of the friendships that I do have. There was just so much that these couple of months carried. And so going into the new year, it was like, okay, like the reality kind of hit of what am I going to do?
00:29:38
Krystal Thomas
Rest has been cool, Lord, but you know, we got to eat. Right. And so right after that worship service, I get terribly sick. I think I must've had the flu. And remember talking to my sister. She's like, you need to go to urgent care. You need to go to the doctor. And I'm sitting there and I'm like, I can't, I don't have, don't have health insurance. And I was like, I can go. Right. It's just, it's not covered. Right. It's a lot more expensive. And so,
00:30:07
Krystal Thomas
In that very real time of realizing like, oh my goodness, like this is how so many people live and like they may be sick and these things and having to negotiate what they can and cannot do.
00:30:21
Krystal Thomas
Yeah. And I was taking medicine and like, again, single woman mid thirties. I was like, oh my gosh, my middle age now, this is crazy. 35 crazy. It's a whole new place to be. And yeah, sorry, that just made me chuckle. Sometimes I just forget how old I am. I feel like once you become, like you're in your it's like, I know I'm not 30. It's been several years since then, but like, where am I? And I'm like, no, 35. We are whole and so I'm sick and, and I'm having to like take care of myself. often I know a tactic of the enemy is to always bring up my singleness when I'm not feeling my best or I'm, I'm feeling a bit low.
00:31:03
Krystal Thomas
and so like having to take it easy and being in forced rest and starting the new year in that way. And then the following week I had, uh, an intensive class for seminary uh, trauma and crisis counseling.
00:31:18
Krystal Thomas
And so like, oh my gosh, like how am to this class? I'm so sick. And it was like a Zoom call. So it's like from 10 a.m. to like 7 p.m. And we're talking about trauma and crisis for five days. And it's kind of...
00:31:37
Krystal Thomas
It's nothing but the Lord because the class was very intense in the sense that, you know, it isn't intensive. It's a lot of content all at once, but it's also the topic. It's just very heavy when you're talking about trauma, when you're talking about grief, when you're talking about lament and crisis. There's just a lot. And as I was talking to some other people when I was sharing what I was learning, I was like,
00:32:01
Krystal Thomas
am I crisis? Have I experienced crisis? And realizing in hindsight, it was like, oh, wow, these are some of the things that like I didn't have language for or know, right? And it was in that class, as challenging as it was, that I regained my love and my excitement for the call of pastoral care. And the difference between the role of pastor and pastoral care feel like there's quite a few pastors who are more in the other giftings as opposed to shepherds. And so how just saw greater need for pastoral care within churches, but also especially of ministry leaders as well.
00:32:45
Krystal Thomas
And so I just felt really energized and excited because I felt like I had clarity. I was also like becoming even more, you know, as I had been praying and spending time with the Lord, like more discerning and more sensitive to the move of the spirit and what was happening in the room. There was just like, even still now, there's just so much more that am picking up on and I'm learning and I'm growing. And it has been...
00:33:19
Krystal Thomas
love who I'm becoming. love that could take this risk. And even though I wrestle with the Lord in some moments, I'm like, what is going to happen? And I panic. Overall, I'm reminded of who the Lord is and that he is someone I can trust and who has been so faithful. It's so much of my story and so much of my journey. I get excited about knowing that the assignment that's next for me, I'll be able to pastorally care for people with a new level of capacity and to be even better at it because of the training that I'm receiving. Y'all, there's also been so many praise reports. I was worried about, not having job if I'd be able to continue with school.
Faith and Financial Provision
00:34:04
Krystal Thomas
I'm just like, there's a lot of tears. There's a lot of feelings. This is turning out to be a longer podcast. I promise we're at the end. I'm landing the plane.
00:34:13
Krystal Thomas
But I was so scared that I would have to take a break from seminary. And for those of you who are doing an end-of program, it could be anywhere, depending on your school,
00:34:25
Krystal Thomas
The average time for mine is five to seven years. And so it's been long, I'm starting my fourth year now. It's been a long time of like being in school from spring, summer, fall, like year round school.
00:34:39
Krystal Thomas
And it felt like having to take a break from was like me giving up and another thing that I had to let go of. But I had to be honest. I was like, look, Lord, know financially it doesn't make sense. I can't do it. But also I know that if you want me to do it, you'll make a way. And if you don't, then there's a reason why not meant to do it. And I released it.
00:35:02
Krystal Thomas
Y'all, when I tell you I got an email the day the deadline for when payment was due for classes. I got a full scholarship for the semester.
00:35:15
Krystal Thomas
Out of the blue. Out of the blue.
00:35:20
Krystal Thomas
And I was just like, Lord, you were so good. And I know I needed to be honest and surrender that, that whatever he has planned for me is better than what I can imagine or plan for myself. And as someone who is a planner, as someone who has battled with both pride and control, that is a very scary thing to do.
00:35:41
Krystal Thomas
But it's also not in knowing that who you're placing your trust in is one of the safest and the best things that you can do. And so here I am about to start my spring semester.
00:35:55
Krystal Thomas
with classes that have already been paid in full. Somehow there was even a surplus from what I had been paying. So I received a check from the school that covered additional bills and expenses. Y'all, I'm just telling you,
00:36:10
Krystal Thomas
the Lord has been so faithful and is so faithful. And so if this is you and you're in this place of whether you are still in the midst of it and you're waiting for the Lord to move and it's getting a little uncomfortable, trust me, I get it. This is the last week of January. The bills are going to be due January 31st.
00:36:28
Krystal Thomas
But the Lord has got me safely and securely this far. And I'm trusting and believing that he is doing miracles. I was like, here I am. For those of you on the East Coast, we have a snowstorm. was like, I can't even leave if I wanted to. I am stuck here. Right? Right.
00:36:44
Krystal Thomas
But again, just being reminded that it's not about me. get to abide with the Lord. I get to be close with him. I get to pray and discern and move according to his spirit, but I'm not moving out of fear.
00:36:57
Krystal Thomas
And even if things don't work out the way that I had hoped or I had planned, am trusting and believing that it will be for my better and for my good. yeah.
00:37:09
Krystal Thomas
And I don't know if I could have said that if I hadn't taken the leap, if I hadn't trusted the Lord with this time of my life, if I wouldn't have walked away from all that I knew.
00:37:24
Krystal Thomas
A friend of mine, she keeps bringing up, a really good friend of mine, keeps talking about how a lot of what I'm experiencing, and even in her own life, is very similar to Abram.
00:37:35
Krystal Thomas
We always talk about Abraham from the lens of victory, from how it all worked out, from him already being in the land that was promised.
00:37:45
Krystal Thomas
But that story now has a new weight for Because to leave everything behind is very hard.
00:37:55
Krystal Thomas
And there are a lot of emotions and there are a lot of feelings that come up with that. When I was wrestling and joking with the Lord, I was like, well, Abram, at least what would a lot he had to ride. Like, come on. Yeah.
00:38:09
Krystal Thomas
And, uh, even for me, I've been blessed with, who are in a similar season who have walked alongside me too, but you know, we are still praying for that husband.
00:38:21
Krystal Thomas
I'm just saying, it just, that story has new meaning Genesis 12, And so if you are person who the Lord has been prompting you and you are afraid to take the step, take the step.
00:38:37
Krystal Thomas
I know that there have decisions in my life where I chose comfort over the Lord
00:38:52
Krystal Thomas
And to not view this choice a burden, but review, like view it as such an honor. And I know this is coming from someone who is in the midst of it. So please know that I'm not trying to sugarcoat it, but it is an honor.
00:39:11
Krystal Thomas
When you think of the people in the Bible who the Lord has called out, the people who gave up everything to be able to choose the Lord, to be able to stand firm in your faith,
00:39:24
Krystal Thomas
of who God is to trust what he has for you more than what you can see for yourself. Y'all, there has been so much that I have learned. There has been so much I have experienced so much. I so many areas I have grown in, that I would not have if I had refused to step out of something that I knew was no longer working for me and was no longer, God had no longer given me the grace to do.
Encouragement to Take Steps of Faith
00:39:54
Krystal Thomas
And so he's worth it. He's worth the cost. He's worth the discomfort. Because who I am even now in the midst of it, there's so much joy. There's so much life. There is so much hope.
00:40:13
Krystal Thomas
I've started to dream again. I've started to cherish my life in ways that I could never without realizing how sacred and how beautiful they are. Even with school, I'm going into the semester like, what can I learn? Like, was like, she, it's back like first semester, right?
00:40:36
Krystal Thomas
But it's worth it. It's worth it, y'all. It is worth it. And I can't wait to come on here and share with you. the good news. I'm already seeing the victory, guys. I'm already seeing and trusting. And so actually, that's what
Conclusion and Prayer for Boldness
00:40:51
Krystal Thomas
I'm going to do. I'm going end this episode in a prayer. know we typically don't do that, but yeah, I just want us to be bold.
00:41:01
Krystal Thomas
I think a lot of us have been living
00:41:05
Krystal Thomas
very small-y. was like, there's a better way of saying that, but I don't know what it is. And it's not to say that our lives are small, but I think that we have chosen to make ourselves small to fit in.
00:41:18
Krystal Thomas
We have chosen to make ourselves small because we are fearful that we are too much. We have chosen to make ourselves small because we are afraid where the Lord is calling us to be. my very wise professor, when he was praying over, at the end of my intensive, he prayed over each and every one of us. And he prayed specifically over me that I would be bold and be bold even imperfection.
00:41:45
Krystal Thomas
And I think that that really freed me in a lot of ways. Cause you guys know, I've been, I describe myself as a recovering perfectionist. I'm trying not to in the stages that I have for myself and unrealistic standards. And the Lord is not asking me to be perfect. He's just asking me to be obedient and to come. And so something about realizing that I get to be bold and I won't get it 100% right all the time. but that I am trusting and I am sitting with the one who can be trusted, the one who is sovereign and the one who holds me in his righteous hand. And yeah, that's my prayer for you all too.
00:42:27
Krystal Thomas
That no matter where you are in this journey, whether the Lord is starting to stir up dreams that make you a little uncomfortable, or he's asking you to take a step that feels like it goes against everything that makes sense.
00:42:41
Krystal Thomas
that he is worth it, that he is trustworthy, and that he will hold you. He has helped me these last couple of months. And if he is going to do it for me, he will do it for you. It may not look how you want it There have been struggle. Don't get me wrong.
00:42:56
Krystal Thomas
A lot of things that I had to navigate that I didn't want to navigate. But I have always had what I needed.
00:43:04
Krystal Thomas
I've been loved so deeply and cared for in ways that I could not even imagine.
00:43:10
Krystal Thomas
And for that, has been worth it. So let's conclude in prayer.
00:43:18
Krystal Thomas
Lord, thank you for the gift of transitions.
00:43:24
Krystal Thomas
I thank you that
00:43:26
Krystal Thomas
And you're all knowing and sovereign
00:43:30
Krystal Thomas
in good way.
00:43:32
Krystal Thomas
That you do not leave us where we feel comfortable.
00:43:36
Krystal Thomas
That you call us to do great things.
00:43:41
Krystal Thomas
But you do not leave us by ourselves in it. You are a God that is so personal. You are one that is close with us at all times. You have given us the gift of your spirit. You have given us your son.
00:43:55
Krystal Thomas
And so I know these choices, these decisions may seem overwhelming and big, but what is big for you? So Lord, I pray for the person that is wrestling, that they would be reminded that you are safe, God, that you are trustworthy, that you are faithful that as they learn to surrender what they had hoped and what they dreamed, that they can also lament with you, they can grieve with you, trust that they will heal, trust that there will be new life on the other end, trust that they will experience joy, that it will lead to a life that they couldn't have even imagined or dreamed of, one of such freedom, one of such favor, and one of such blessings.
00:44:45
Krystal Thomas
Lord, for the one who are stirring up things and passions and ideas, Lord, I pray that they embrace it, that they write it down in notebooks, that they pray and surrender it to you, that they trust in your timing and in your way and in your provision, God.
00:45:05
Krystal Thomas
Lord, you will often reveal things to us in advance before it's time. And so I pray for discernment. I pray for patience.
00:45:16
Krystal Thomas
And that they are reminded that you wait with them.
00:45:32
Krystal Thomas
You will not leave or forsake, God. You've already gone before us and you are with us now. So we will not be afraid. We will not be discouraged.
00:45:45
Krystal Thomas
But we will abide and rest the one who can hold it all. We pray all this in your name. Amen. Thank you all so much for joining for this episode of United Not Uniform. Remember, there's more than enough space for you to be seen and to see others. I'll see you all next time.
00:46:04
Krystal Thomas
Bye.