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Savage Worlds - The Phony Express 3.12: It Is What It Is, The Big Finale
47 Plays3 months ago
It's here...The bittersweet and very weird Finale of the original carnation of The Phony Express. Today, we see the final act, produced by Vanta Black, herself. Will the gang play their parts and put an end to Vanta's weird scheme? Let's find out, shall we! (oh, and welcome back to Kimmie for returning as Bella!)
Thanks for everything, gang. We're excited for more fun coming down the pipeline, but I feel like our original Phony Express story needed a fair chance to rest. We love that you enjoyed these characters and their really odd story. I know it went from kinda grounded to supernatural, but it was fun every step of the way. We love you guys.
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Transcript
Introduction and Recap
00:00:24
Speaker
OK, and we have begun. Good morning, good afternoon and good evening, ladies, gentlemen, non binary folks. If universe is none, none, none. This is role players and welcome back to the Funny Express episode. but Well, I think it's 12. Pretty sure it's 12. Not counting the X episode is 12. The 13th overall, though, is that's crazy. Big season, guys. I just noticed everybody muted themselves all at once on this call. It was so funny. It was like I said something so cringy that they're like, fuck that guy. And they all muted as if they don't want to be here. um No way. We're doing it out of respect, buddy. I don't know. i know um What you all did it so quickly that i was like oh no they're mad at me. flow
00:01:01
Speaker
So anyway was i talking about oh yeah what happened last time so things i'm gonna go over quite a few episodes all at once so buckle in i'm gonna try to do it quickly so. um
Maverick's Search and Vision
00:01:12
Speaker
Uh, where do I start? Okay. All the way back. Cutter gets punched by people. He's getting, he's at that, uh, Winchesterville and a bunch of the actors like raw and they tackle him and they put him in. That's what he goes. Hey, hey, hey, I'm being oppressed. And then Bella goes, ah, and he goes, Oh no, you gotta save me. And she goes, fuck you dog and punch him in the face, knocks him out. He wakes up in doll town somewhere, like a fake old K uh, carriage, like being rocked back and forth. to continue to to Right. And while that's going on,
00:01:37
Speaker
ah Mavericks all like he's going to the other town i was a bunch of actors are meant to black penis on a pretend like we were doing stuff while you were here i'm in this fucking bird is fake that's not my bird okay cool and then we got a rain and runs out like i'm just a little baby in a bell is like i got your chat i'm gonna put you in a bigger body that way we can avoid hurting children on this podcast and she took her all the way to pumpkin science house and put her into ah an older body so it's a little less egregious when she gets hurt.
00:02:04
Speaker
and That was cool um and so she did that he said alright baby i gotta go do some shit you go to balls balls balls but don't get no weed and so she drove off and that was when she drove off the punch cutter in the mouth.
00:02:14
Speaker
um
Reunion and Vanta Black's Ultimatum
00:02:15
Speaker
I'm gonna fast forward now we go forward and maverick is like i gotta go to town i think cutters there and he goes there and ah he finds cutter and they encounter bendy and all the crazy stuff happen with the girls and fighting and then she says i got my aunt is okay whatever my sword got guns in it pe pe pe and then they go on a load of venture together between three different colored past to figure out where we should go.
00:02:37
Speaker
to Rescue our friends and event a black like i'll be it you ain't gonna find me actually that's not what she said she said oh hey, just follow a path and you'll find the people you're looking for. I mean so they went off to try to find bathy but then they smell ishy because apparently maverick is a greyhound now and so they went down the ishy path.
00:02:54
Speaker
and While that was happening, Rin was having a phantasmagorical trip in Dudad where she helped people get amputated and then to power down, she infused herself with some real nice drugged up goodness and went on a real trip with something called the Stefano Protocol, a big old skeleton that helped protect her and a land pirate named Rim Dundrig.
00:03:12
Speaker
And they went on a crazy adventure, ah upsetting a lot of people along the way until they ultimately ultimately ended up at Punkenstein's place, but not before Rym went off on his own and found that woman that Rym tipped off into the into the lake. And they ended up doing some sweet, sweet naked dancing. And then he found her name was Sheila. And then they went to go and rob Punkenstein's house. And then, oh man, Rym gets attacked after she's having a trip coming down from all of her drugs. And then, oh man, she gets hurt.
00:03:40
Speaker
Stefano runs her up to get her into a safe place and then all the other little baby things come out with buzz saws and machine guns are going off and then for she gets killed and we don't know what happened to ram we just
Roles and Performances
00:03:52
Speaker
know last we saw me was covered in a sticky glitter bomb glue and. Screamed off into the night and then.
00:03:59
Speaker
Eventually rin woke up and went and found her friends over in doll town after dropping some people off and do dad and they reunited and rin said man i'm sorry man but people keep telling me i should kill you guys but like i just want to be friends cuz my memory say that you're nice people and then they all have a warm embrace and then they travel through doll town and i see all these different scenes being acted out by all these are paid actors of what happened that led to the death of Vanta Black's golden retriever named Duke. I don't think they said her name was Duke, but that's his name. You'll find out in a minute. um And so this golden and retriever died because Osterman-Cutter prevented the medicine from getting where it needed to go, thus setting Vanta Black on her journey to hurt these guys. um And then Rim was all like, that's crazy. And then we saw a weird scene where um
00:04:46
Speaker
Ryn saw a weird scene where ah she was shown that Cutter and Maverick killed the original Ryn, trying to sway her to hurt them. And then finally they saw a scene where Maverick's wife gets axed by a guy playing Masher, and then Maverick's like, you guys are stupid, this is sucky, stop it. And then he walked through, not even caring what he saw.
00:05:05
Speaker
And then they made their way out eventually to a large tunnel that led them towards the biggest stage where vanta black is set up not before buying a bunch of fun stuff from the merchant though like new hats new guns new apparel and so they're all outfitted and looking sexy as they walk down this narrow pathway. I don't do the grand stage of the black introduces herself finally revealed revealing that there's a huge crowd of people waiting to watch the big show. And suspended above the ground or three cages with bathy ishy and pumpkin stein in it and they all have bomb strapped to the cages and then to black says hey if you guys do the part you're supposed to do everything will be hunky dory and if you don't. Boomstown, at least that's what you can infer. And that's where we are now, guys. I think I hit everything. I know that was a long explanation, but we had a lot to cover in a very short amount of time. So, that's where we are. That makes sense. I hit all the nails as many times as I could without hitting my thumb and giving myself a boo-boo. Yeah. So, cutter.
00:06:11
Speaker
Maverick, Rin, you're all standing. I think you all approach the main stage at some point when they introduce you. So you're all standing on or near the stage and you can see that Ishii and Bathie and Punkenstein, even though bombs were placed atop across these cages.
00:06:28
Speaker
They're still waving, still singing. She's still whistling very, very proudly and happily in her cage. Punkin sign is a big grin on his face as he points to a guy in the crowd who looks just like him, who's cosplaying as him. um And Vanta has shouted out like this is what you need to do. So the crowd is now chanting. What do you all do before the show begins? ah
Concerns and Emotional Revelations
00:06:53
Speaker
What does the show entail?
00:06:56
Speaker
Are you asking me or are you asking Vansa? I'm asking Vansa. So you look up and you shout, what does the show entail? No, yes. Bye bye. I was speaking Korean. She's going to say, why are you speaking Korean?
00:07:11
Speaker
Um, she shouts down to you. Oh, she doesn't really shout. She has on like a little PA system. She says, well, there's just a couple of acts. You know, every good show has three acts. You just have to play through all three acts, whatever role that you're given. You will give a, be given a costume change. Of course you got to look the parts. And then if you act out your roles accordingly and you don't get too crazy, that's it. three x Just You just got to give them a good show. And depending on how good the crowd is feeling.
00:07:40
Speaker
I'll make a judgment from there, but you gotta entertain the crowd. Right, Mr. Maverick? I'm very suspicious of you not meaning us any harm. I feel like play our parts well, but I guess with the bombs all there, we don't really have much choice, do we? Well, I mean, you can make whatever choice that you want. Just you'll have to live with whatever consequences happen, if that makes sense.
00:08:09
Speaker
And I wouldn't prefer to now to bury the consequences of, like, all these people blowing up. Oh, well. Then it sounds like you're on board, right? Should we get you outfitted real quick, then? and If I don't need to wear any stupid costume, sure. Well, no, no, no. You're going to have to change. What you're wearing just won't do for this scene. Who am I going to play besides me? Oh, don't you worry. I just got to get confirmation from the others real quick and then we will get on it. I promise you that, mister.
00:08:38
Speaker
um And so then she looks down to you cutter and she says well, mr. Cutter can I or should I say Clarence was it what do you prefer to be called? um Doesn't matter I don't care All right doesn't matter. I don't care. Are you on board to? Play the parts that you are given to you I suppose so I Oh, good, because I would just. Oh, wait, hang on a second. There's someone that really wants to see you in your first big breakout role. um how how how How terrible of me.
00:09:12
Speaker
um And then you ah see stepping into view ah behind that kind of foggy glass that Vanta is standing beside. First, you see who you definitely recognize right away as Bella. She is standing up in there kind of, you know, next to a woman. um Cutter, can you describe what your mom looks like?
00:09:36
Speaker
ah She's the sweetest little lady ever did see um I want to know about this let's describe her as the the grandma from um ah it's Beverly Hill Billy's but she's not that old but she kind of has that kind of a look to her she has kind of her house her house dress on with maybe like a little sweater over top that they threw on her when they brought and dragged her out here and like I Don't know if she was fed a line that this was all a good show for anything or what but she's like she's like waving down a yeah So ah you see her up there, she's waving down at you and she's kind of poking Bella. She says, Oh, isn't he just so cute in his little hat? You know, I'm the one that told him that he should wear one of those really, those, those nice hats because I don't want him to get any of that, you know, that sun in his eyes. He has very sensitive skin, my little, my little Clarence.
00:10:25
Speaker
Um, and so Bella, or should I say Kimmy? So everybody welcome back to me. Kimmy is here. Uh, Kimmy. Okay. Bella. Uh, Martha looks up at you. She's a little kind of hunched over a little shorter than you, uh, looks up and she says all these sweet things about her little boy cutter. Um, her little boy Clarence, I should say, what do you do?
00:10:49
Speaker
Yes, he is just a darling. Look at him down there. Are you excited for his first big role? i i i just I just had no idea that my little Clarence was just gonna, I didn't know he was even into the theater. Man, I feel so guilty. And she yells down, but Clarence, Clarence, wipe your cheek off, sweetie. You got some schmutz on there. Oh, we can go, Ma. What are you doing? And and she said she says, yeah, Guten talked to all of you. um And ah she kind of after she screams down to cut her,
00:11:26
Speaker
She says, oh yeah, if I had known, I would have gotten him some more books to read. Man, his book learning wasn't even that good. And now I hear his little girlfriend down there it's teaching him to read. How sweet is that? I know. It's it's it's so adorable. And Bella's going to put her hands on Martha's shoulder and just gently hold her there, just trying to send the message that I've got your mama, so you better play fair. Just out of curiosity, roll it ah do you have an intimidation role on that character? I don't know if I gave you one or not.
00:11:56
Speaker
Let's see. Yes, I do. All right, ah so you rolled a four. So yeah, you see that and like it's very apparent. So the reason I'm having you do it is because you're part of the show. And so I think that you do it in such a beautifully clever way that you definitely send that message to Cutter, like don't fuck around. But the rest of the crowd just thinks you're being so sweet to her like as they look up and see you interacting. But like the way that you're kind of staring daggers at Cutter, you know that like this is real and that you don't fuck around or you will find out.
00:12:27
Speaker
Glare. Yeah, you definitely see Brynn just like furiously waving like, hi mom. How does Brynn react to seeing your mom up in the box? She's just furiously waving excited. Hi, mom. Hi, baby girl. It's good to see you. Where's my mom?
00:12:46
Speaker
ah you were yeah i And then you see you see a coffin drops out of the sky and a skeleton rolls out in person. And then somebody picks up the skeleton and ah puts the skull on their head. Paul Shav says, o is that my boy Maverick? No, Maverick. Are you going to be in the theater? Yes, I am. I've become a theater person. Oh, those are called actors, my son. yeah
Punkenstein's Lab and Realization
00:13:21
Speaker
I forgot. my No, my son. Is it son son son? What is that? What is son in German? My son. My son. I knew it was something like that. um I remember I remember that in sister because schwester is such a fun word to say. It's a schwester. All right. Anyway, so now a skeleton doesn't. treat You say, you say, where's my mom? And then she goes, you know, I'm not going to lie, we were trying to find her, but we just could not figure out where she was buried.
00:13:47
Speaker
moment Yeah, we tried. We interrogated so many people trying to figure out where her corpse was because we were going to bring her. But no one knew we found your wife, though.
00:14:03
Speaker
You know, the dead one you find her underground buried, you know, worm food. I mean, I guess. But how would you know where I buried her?
00:14:17
Speaker
I have a lot of money and have a lot of people look in a lot of places. It's more embarrassing that I couldn't find your dead mama because I really wanted your parents all to be here. and Oh, well, you can't have everything perfect. That's true. You know, sometimes what makes us imperfect is what makes us special. You know, my imperfection is that I am perfect. You see, I don't think so humble.
00:14:39
Speaker
yeah And she looks over at Billy goes, oh, I know, sweetie. I know. Thank you so much for noticing. um And um so ah she yells down to you, Ren. She says, Vanta looks at you and says, and Miss w Ren, your mom is here to see you in your big debut. um Can I count on your spectacular performance for the big show? I wanted to be the greatest actress of all times. You have no idea
00:15:11
Speaker
How I'm going to make you so happy. Oh, well, you hear that. You hear that, Miss Bella. Your little girl is just so eager to just to please this whole crowd. She's going to be a star. She makes me so proud. I'm so proud to call her my baby. I love you, mom. I love you too, baby. Okay. You just, you just make me so proud.
00:15:32
Speaker
you hear mar You hear Martha goes, oh, that's your little girl. Oh my goodness. She looks just like you. Oh my Lord. Look at her little, oh, me she got a little head on just like, just like my little boy. Oh, you guys, you guys can be boyfriend and girlfriend down there.
00:15:47
Speaker
it's i see i It's 1901. It was fine back here. I mean, you're not wrong, american age but I already got me a lady. Oh no, I know sweetie. I i didn't know you could hear me. ah Can you turn that mic off? And I say all my, my joys and jubilations about my little boy. I don't want to embarrass him.
00:16:09
Speaker
And then as they're having that little discussion, I got out of the corner of my mouth, I say, Brent, don't forget, this is very serious. And they got your mother lying to you about us too. So don't forget all that stuff. All right. You guys seem like you're getting a little too excited there. and She elbows him in the ribs. I know. Shut up. help god Careful. I've been wounded many times. and i have All of a sudden you hear a whistle. Where'd that frickin? I thought we got around taken care of. Yeah. I thought we, I thought we were good. Okay. Okay.
00:16:39
Speaker
um All right. So let's have ah the show begin. So um you see a bunch of people are coming up in costume and um you see ah one gentleman has like essentially an outfit that looks almost exactly like um Vanta's like brown coat, brown hat that he has like a like a really kind of shitty looking makeshift wig. And he kind of walks up to you and he says, all right, so you're going to play a big part today, you're going to get to play Vanta herself in this next scene. Okay, so just kind of get this coat on here and he tries to like help you get dressed. um And like he takes you like they like a couple of guys come and bring up like a big tarp and they hold it up in like three different points around you. That way you kind of have some privacy and he's trying to help you change into your Vanta black outfit.
00:17:29
Speaker
Oh yeah. When she emerges, she does a Marilyn pose. And you just, you just look so stunning as the best you can be for 1901 makeup for, um, in like this old rusty town of dull town. Um, and then you see, um, you see, uh, a couple of young gals walk up to you, Maverick, and they say, all right, Mr. Maverick, we're going to need you to lose that hat and we're going to need you to let us just play with your facial hair just a little bit.
00:17:58
Speaker
um Because you get to play a really important role you get to play dr. Funkenstein up there, right? So we really need you to talk about concern. Why would you play that's just a part of we don't know we're not part of the writing and process we're just told that you supposed to dress up as right now we have a little chair for you to sit in.
00:18:16
Speaker
um so you know just i hope you got close huh Do I also need to change my clothes? Oh yeah, we're gonna put you in like some kind of dirty bloody lab coat gear here in a second and some long rubber gloves and we're gonna have kind of put like a little real heavy metal backpack on you when you sit down. Are those clothes in some kind of way ripped? Yes. What does that mean? Why wouldn't they be ripped? mean what for How are they ripped?
00:18:44
Speaker
Oh, are they rigged? Oh, yeah, they're just like standard. Just like there's just like white, just like white cloth that they cut into like kind of fit around you. And it's like, all right, we're just going to need you to everything that's going on. We're going to need you to take off your pants. ah You won't need anything. You know, your holster or anything like that. Like there's no gun fighting scene in this in this one. So we just need to just put on the lab coat and this big old metal backpack and sit in this chair right here. OK, that's only really one way I'm playing along of this that I'm keeping my rifle.
00:19:14
Speaker
Well, can you just hide it like behind your chair or something then? Because like we there's no guns in the scene. Then we'll just have to change the scene up a little bit. And then you see like you hear ah Vanta up at the top. She goes, now, now, now, Mr. Maverick. And then you see as you look up, she's like starting like press a couple of buttons in front of her and you see one of the devices on Ishii's cage starts to blink. Like you see your red flashing lights come off it like.
00:19:41
Speaker
think think think And then you see the ladies who are trying to address you and they go, oh, hey you know what? Just give me your gun real quick, OK? Because if that thing goes off, we're all dead. So could you just please come on? Fine.
00:19:56
Speaker
Uh, so they take your gun, they take your pants, they take your pants off of you and they put you in like these kind of like kind of dirty rubberized pants. It's like really hard to move in and they set you down on a metal chair. Uh, and they start like waxing the shit out of your mustache to try to like make it be as pointy as possible moving away from your face. Um, and they're just like yanking out, like just pulling on your mustache, trying to make it, trying to make it more straight. Be careful with that. Look, I'm sorry. I've just, it's once the last time you comb this thing. Damn.
00:20:27
Speaker
You know, I'm a busy man. I'm a busy man. I have no time to to clean myself or to straighten my standing. Love it. OK, and then um you see ah you see they kind of walk up to you cutter and they say, um, so your part is kind of.
00:20:49
Speaker
It's kind of weird, but they want us to dress you up as this dog. Oh, man, could you just. um It's kind of awkward, I know you didn't sign up for this, but could you just put on like this kind of hood that kind of like a little doggy face and maybe walk around on all fours for a minute? ah We'll see about all fours names, but yeah, sure, I'll put his little hat on. All right, and then um you see you see again like as like you're putting that on and she says, all right, well, you better get down on your On your all fours there, because and then like she points up and then you see like one of the devices on Bathie's cage starts to blink right as well. wow Well, I mean, I can probably do that once the same thing started. Well, for whatever. All right. I just got to sort of kneel down and like, OK, rest my hands or my knees in front of me. You want to do a performance role? Let's see how well well how good it looks for the for them in the crowd.
00:21:43
Speaker
Really warm the crowd up. Nine. That's a nine. I mean, just your slow demeanor, whatever it is that you do is like the crowd's like, yeah, he's doing it. Yeah. wo go co co And you see your mom up in the up in the box is like just like clapping away. She's so excited to see you in your first roll.
00:22:01
Speaker
She's like, oh, you're the cutest doggy in the world, my baby. You look so good. And she like elbows, Bella. He looks so good. He's so dang cute. He can wear anything. And he's just my little Clarence's. Oh my God. Thank you all for bringing me out here. I've never seen a live show before. It's just going to be special for you and everyone else. And I'm so glad you get to be here to support your little Clarence. Every parent should be able to do that and support their children.
00:22:27
Speaker
Uh-huh. Absolutely. Are you, are you going to be in the show too? Or are you kind of up here ah surveilling like I am? I'm going to have my moments, but oh right now I'm going to sit with you. Oh, go on. Go on with your bad self, Bella. Oh my goodness. You are just so pretty. You have a face for the theater. Let me tell you what.
00:22:49
Speaker
Oh, you're too sweet, Martha. No, you're too sweet. Oh my God. Give me a hug. um' you just Come here here. Oh, I'm going to bake you some cookies. Oh my goodness. Maybe we can share some recipes one these days. Oh, I would be happy to. You know, I have this, this peanut butter casserole that you would not believe. Oh, peanut butter casserole. That sounds yeah like my little Ren would absolutely adore.
00:23:15
Speaker
Oh, I will absolutely. Oh, yes. Let's swap recipes. Sometimes we can see if our kids will like each other's cooking and baking.
00:23:24
Speaker
um So as you guys are having your little chitty chat up there, you see um Vanta gets on the mic and then you see like another like a couple of guys jump up on top of that box and they roll this huge sheet down the um like a big ass curtain essentially they're turning it into that rolls down where the first one dropped and it covers up the other three cages and it just looks like a huge backdrop and you guys are there is split in half part of it is like this big cozy looking room with a fireplace in it and then you hear the other side looks a little bit more of like a like a ah
00:24:09
Speaker
Like it's in some sort of like woodland trail somewhere. But the guys kind of move the the side that has like the fireplace in a nice cozy room. They pull it over to the side so it best lines up with where you guys are. Then you hear Vanta starts to narrate. And she says. She says, OK, so this first scene takes place in a cozy little room. ah With with beautiful blue walls and ah Although it is sunny outside, it is dark in the room as we see the beautiful, perfect Vanta Black played by Ren here and her ailing Golden Retriever Duke as he rides in pain on the floor.
00:24:57
Speaker
And so we will see the interaction between these two and what happens. And then you see another person walks in wearing a white coat um and has like a little medical bag in their hands and a stethoscope around their neck. And they walk in and they walk up to you, Rin, as Vanta Black. And they he says, Miss Black, I am as you know, I can only. And he's like really hamming it up as he's like he's kind of nervous. His eyes keep darting back and forth to the crowd. And he's like, Miss Black,
00:25:28
Speaker
You know that I am really only a doctor for people. There's only so much I can do for Duke. I mean, the only thing I can think of is is for you to two find some sort of experimental medicine somewhere that could potentially save his life. And then you hear Vanta calls out, now we cue to, we cue to, quote unquote, Duke, writhing in pain on the floor. Ow.
00:25:55
Speaker
ah this ah Roll a performance roll for out. It's the dog that says out. I got a five to five i and she's in the k crowd goes, Oh, I'm like, Oh, what am I like to my side? Like, i with like um Oh, now I got to ask just because I don't want to force you into doing anything. Would cutter be doing anything else or would he just be trying to play the part?
00:26:25
Speaker
I'm just kind of sitting there awkwardly right now on the floor. It's going to awkwardly trying to just kind of sort through everything. OK, so you just say out and you do that and you hear their the crowd goes, oh, oh, no, poor baby. um And then you see like people off in the crowd like grabbing onto each other. Oh, I hope he'll be OK. Oh, no, poor Duke. And then you see the doctor turns to you, Vanta. And then you hear now Q Q Vanta just beside herself that her poor little dog, you might not make it action.
00:26:56
Speaker
oh um ah of a review Don't make it so bad re sam He's like trying to talk you down you're over sellingling it killed this dog god name what um and Okay, and then the doctor says they're there miss black they're there I mean there may be hope yet I have a colleague across the pond in England who might be able to help you I could try to write her right away to see if maybe she can send some sort of You know doctor or maybe come herself to take a look at Duke. He still seems like you might have a few weeks left What do you think?
00:27:39
Speaker
Who can I find for this medicine? Who can you find? Well, it's, it's a very famous, very advanced doctor slash veterinarian. She works on people and on animals and she's from England. I can send a word right away to have her come over and talk to you. Post haste.
00:28:01
Speaker
Post taste, post taste, post taste. And he like pulls out like his book real quick and like kind of like reads it like in under his costume. He's like, yes, post taste, meaning to do it ah quickly and and in a hurry. Yes. And then he runs off screen. But before he does, he stops at you, Cutter, and he starts to rub your belly. And then what are you doing? Thanks, Miller. He rubs your belly.
00:28:29
Speaker
And then we look up and we see Bella is clapping from her seat, just clap, clap, clap. We see um we see like the crowd coming. Oh, and we see ah Martha goes, Oh, no, my baby. Is he really sick? Boy, he's so good. Right. He just really looks like he is like an ailing doubt. I didn't know he had it in. him um And then we we go back down to the stage and then um we hear some more stage direction and we hear Vanta say,
00:28:58
Speaker
Now, Duke struggles to get to his feet to walk over to console a weeping Vanta action. ah So more i'm ah I'm like kneeling down as I was holding my side with my one front palm. And um so I um and put my other hand on my and my knee and I go. a And I stand up on two feet. And I just sort of humble over. And it's all right there. ah I'm going to be okay. Woof.
00:29:31
Speaker
well
00:29:35
Speaker
Woof. That's a good actor. You hear people from the ground like, oh, plot twist. Oh, wow. Did that really happen? I don't know. I haven't met Duke. So, ah quote unquote, Vanta, how do you what do how do you respond? What's on your lines?
00:29:54
Speaker
What do I do for my toot? Let's try to make him comfortable. and How do you try to make him comfortable? She puts just a blanket and a pillow on his lap. There you go. How do you react to the cutter? Well, it's pretty nice.
00:30:18
Speaker
My tail's wagging. I know. My tail's wagging. They didn't give me a tail though, so just imagine. You see people run up and you just feel like a staple in your asses, like a staple, and they run off stage. I'm not going to wiggle my keister, but it's wagging.
00:30:39
Speaker
um All right. And then, like, you see all the lights go off for a brief second and everybody goes, Bravo, Bravo. And then the thunderous plus. So why don't you both roll performance rolls to see, like, how much you got the crowd involved in your performance? Well, 14 from the team. Damn. I'm sorry, goes gaga for a dying dog performance. Yes, please. I don't have that. Can I do ah persuasion?
00:31:09
Speaker
um Um, you know, sure. Why not? Go for it. I clicked the seven. There we go. Seven. Okay. Yeah. You've got a few people that are just like, Oh, you know, they I mean, she looks the part. She looks good. She looks good. Yeah. I mean, the accent's a little off, but she's, I think she'll get there. She'll get there. Um, and then like you hear everybody goes, do Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke. And they're like, kind of like everybody's clapping for, for you guys. Um, now is there anything while the lights are off? Cause Maverick, you're, you're about to walk up on stage. You have somebody standing next to you.
00:31:39
Speaker
kind of trying to guide you to say, all right, now you're about to go on as punk and sound. We got your chair up there already. Just go up there and sit in that chair, like I showed you, and then just play the part the way you're supposed to. Okay. When the lights come on, you should already be up there. So they're trying to coax you up while the lights are off. Is there anything that you want to do before? I don't know anything I'm supposed to do. Are you talking to them saying you don't know what you're supposed to do? I know. It'll kind of come to you. If you get lost, your lines are kind of written on like little, little scripts of paper on your chair. Just take a look down at the arms every once in a while. Your lines will be on there.
00:32:08
Speaker
Maybe I'll remember that. I'll probably just like wing it. Okay, I'll be just really trying to do the Punky. You know, he's watching. So let's really try to steal the show. Punky is going to be a fan favorite. I know it. I'll try to be as crazy a scientist as I can be. I love it. Okay. Now, Cutter and Rin, while the lights are off and they're kind of scooting the scenery in the background to reveal the next piece of the scene,
00:32:36
Speaker
Cutter, someone is coming to take you off the stage. um Is there anything that you would like to do before the lights come on? I can't think of anything. Okay. Rin, they're trying to usher you into a new position. You're going to be at what looks like now that you're really looking at the backdrop, it looks like Punkenstein's house.
00:32:56
Speaker
um i know i'm I'm sorry, I lied. It looks like you guys are in the woods. I forgot like so the the transition is that you guys are on like a woodland trail somewhere leaving from Punkenstein's house. You kind of recognize the woods a little bit. um So is there anything that you would like to do while the lights are off? Ren, that's you.
00:33:15
Speaker
I was thinking. Well, think out loud. Is an audio only podcast? and Well, I can't think and talk at the same time. I can't think, I can't think and talk. I mean, that's crazy. Yeah. I mean, you don't have to have anything right right now if you don't want.
00:33:38
Speaker
I think she's just going to let them like do whatever they want, um, as far as, uh, make like moving her and resetting her and whatever, because she knows that like her dad's life is at stake. And so she's not about to try to fuck that up right now. So she's just letting them do whatever they need to. Gotcha. Adrian, what were you saying? I was just thinking since we have like 17 pennies,
00:34:06
Speaker
And just like bombs. If like those bombs go off and we soak the damage with 17 pennies, would we survive the explosion? Depends on what you roll, homie. But you can only roll. You can roll as. and yeah Right. But the soak roll is the soak roll. I guess you could reroll some soak rolls if you really wanted to. But you'd really have to bank on rolling really fucking high. But you could. do Um, Bella, while the lights are off and the scene is transitioning, is there anything that you would be doing or anywhere that you would want to change your position to? Bella wants to go down to get closer to the stage. Okay. Are you just going to hop down or are you going to run down? She's going to jump down. Jump out the window and land like you here a superhero. Yeah. You can do the superhero landing. Yeah. Okay. So you do a superhero landing while the lights are off. People just kind of hear like, a like what the hell was that? Um,
00:35:01
Speaker
And you hear, do you say anything before you jump down? No, she just goes. Yeah, she bringing Martha with her. You're bringing Martha with you. She got her fire nose. She goes, ah guess Oh, you about to go on the stage. As you guys jump down, she goes, Oh, my dear Lord, am I in heaven? Did I die? No, you're still fine. You're just the way you are.
00:35:31
Speaker
But you just got to make an entrance sometimes. Oh, so what? Oh, I don't understand. What are we doing down here, sweetie? We're getting a better view of the stage so we can watch the play. And oh just in case you want to take part in it. Oh, me? I i so i don't i i don't know if if I could do that. i I mean, you've clearly got a face for acting. i You know, look at my old wrinkly visage.
00:35:56
Speaker
Nah, you're beautiful, Martha, but you might have a bigger role to play than you think, okay? i support You want to support your boy, don't you? You want to support Clarence? ah Yeah, of course. I love my my boy. So yeah am I supposed to be in the show then, or are you going to tell me when I go on? I will let you know as soon as it's time for you to hit the stage and get under those spotlights.
00:36:23
Speaker
but but Okay, I got no reason to to disbelieve you. You've been so wonderful so far. ah Okay. um So you're gonna, are you gonna, are you staying like near the scenery side of the stage? Are you moving underneath it? Are you moving around to the backside of the stage, the side of the stage? Where where would you prefer to be when you take? We're gonna be by the scenery side of the stage.
00:36:44
Speaker
Okay. So like, so like up against the backdrop, like, so essentially you guys, you'll be in the back of the stage where the scenery is. Um, so you'll be there. Is there anything else that you do where you just hang in tight right there? Hang in tight right there. She wants to make sure everyone's playing their roles. All right. Once you, uh, let's have you do a notice roll to see if, uh, if how that, how that looks.
00:37:08
Speaker
ah You got a five. Okay, so you're locked in you kind of your eyeballs are slightly darting back and forth keeping an eye on on everybody up on stage as you're starting to like program yourself to react to whatever it is that they're doing. um Okay, perfect. So we go back to the stage, the lights come on and we see Ren you are now positioned.
00:37:26
Speaker
um On like, essentially a chair that a couple of people in black are kind of like moving up and down and there's like little like wooden cutouts of like a little horse on the chair like a horse head and people are just rocking you back and forth. going And then we have we have pumpkin Stein as a Maverick as pumpkin sign kind of riding alongside you and people are kind of moving his chair every once in a while.
00:37:51
Speaker
And then you see that there's actually somebody dressed up as another rain on the stage that joins you with like kinda like little like boxes on their arms and their legs and like kinda like little like like a nice pretty black dress and you hear the one goes.
00:38:07
Speaker
I am Rynn. We are in the woods. um And then you guys are meant to talk. And then Rynn looks over at you, ah fake Rynn, looks over at you, quote unquote, Vanta and says, so how long have you known me? What do you do? ah but At least, you know, like forever, you know. Mm hmm. And how long have you been planning your revenge?
00:38:37
Speaker
Oh, at least for the last six months, a year, at least. Mm hmm. Oh, that sounds great. And then she turns over to Punk inside. She goes, Daddy, how are you on this ride? I look at the chair for a script. It says you look at the chair for your script and it just says it this says improvise here.
00:39:05
Speaker
Improvise. You say the word improvise. So you just say improvise and then you look up and then you see another blinking red light on Ishii's cage starts to blink red. um And then you see the the girl who's playing who's playing Rin goes, you're supposed to improvise, not say improvise. I mean, nobody taught me how to act.
00:39:32
Speaker
um Just answer how you would if someone asked you a question. What was the question again? I have to look up my script. I don't know what I said already. And she says, she says, how are you enjoying your ride through the woods? Oh, it's fine. That is so nice. You gotta ham it up. That's not how Frankenstein talks.
00:39:56
Speaker
um Beautiful. I wish I could change the weather. I wish I could change the weather. It's beautiful. I wish I could change it. I beautiful weather.
00:40:13
Speaker
It's beautiful. I wish I could change it. Punkenstein only likes gloomy shit. He's like, this beautiful taste sucks. you so And then you see Punkenstein up in the cage. He goes, yes, yes, quiet. I do want to change the weather. yeah and i And he he like he like yells up at the box, and he goes up to Vanta. He goes, I am actually working on something.
00:40:40
Speaker
I'm in the crowd goes. um and And so ring ah so up next on your sheet um for punk and sign it says explain that you're a explain that you're a demon trapped in doodad. You're trapped in Montana.
00:40:57
Speaker
So way back when there were like not really a whole lot of like humans like on earth I was already there but then there was like one guy who was like really really strong and and he said like oh you're a demon you can't be on this earth so he like put me down on this place exactly and that's where I've been staying for like the entire time And at some point I managed to create a human body for me, but I couldn't still leave this place. And then you see Ren responds and says, a fake Ren responds and says, is it true that your other brothers and sisters trapped you and your other brothers and sisters here because you were too crazy but alongside that strong person?
00:41:47
Speaker
ah What's crazy that that just jealous of me? You have jealous siblings. Ha ha ha. And then Vanta ah Rin as Vanta, your script says to react with like. ah Disbelief to this. Revelation. No way. No way. You're like you hear a fake ring goes, that's not how Miss Black talks. Come on now.
00:42:19
Speaker
And you look up and you see one of the red lights starts to blink on pumpkin science cage. Oh, my. Sorry. Sorry. um I forgot I was in character. Mm hmm. No way. You can't tell me that that could possibly be true. You see, like the a fake ring kind of puts like an OK set up like I was good. That was good. Oh, my darling.
00:42:42
Speaker
It's all true, my darling. um And you hear punk and sign up from kids. It is true. I did say that. That's funny. but she wrote she wrote that's That's exactly me. Right on, old boy. Spot on. um And then he yells, one note, bigger, bigger stash. Come on. um As you're done on stage and then you see fake Ren speaks again and she says,
00:43:10
Speaker
Miss Black, does this change your outlook on life? No. I'm still bent for revenge. and as she And then you see like fake written pulls out the script and says, no, no, actually, it's yes, but I'm still bent on ra revenge. It's yes. Oh, yes, I'm still bent on revenge. I cannot read, apparently.
00:43:35
Speaker
And also and you hear you're like, there's like stage hands, like yelling up at you from like that of the darkness. And she, they yell up like, how miss black Oh, whole outlook was changed when she realized that nothing matters, that all this is for nothing. But now she's just going to torture. Mr. Cutter. and I would just hit my microphone.
00:43:54
Speaker
that is torture mr cut
00:43:58
Speaker
You're torturing yourself.
00:44:03
Speaker
I torture myself because I'm too flamboyant with my hands when I talk these days. It happens to all of us. Yeah. um And so then, yeah, you um you see like somebody comes up and flips your book like off to the side of you to the page. And it kind of like explains real quick that like as this conversation goes on, Vanta starts to like lose hope that nothing is real and that she's just instead of killing cutters, she wants to just torture everybody and make a big show out of it. And so Renny says, as I said, would you find that now that you know that life is meaningless, that your outlook has changed?
00:44:44
Speaker
I think I need to make a plan. Oh, what kind of plan? You will definitely see. I am going to get. So many things and so many torture devices and I'm going to make sure to punish that guy. And I rolled all of them. There you go.
00:45:14
Speaker
Yes, all of them. You hear Punkenstein yells again. That's true. I did most of it. I'm a genius. I'm a genius. No, I'm a genius. No, I'm a genius. We're a genius.
00:45:31
Speaker
And then the lights go out. And then the ah so Maverick and Rin, roll a performance roll to see ah how you did for this particular one. um For for this other part of state of Act one, eight, eight clicks. When are you supposed to roll performance? I don't have performance. ah yeah Well, in this case, you have to roll performance. Uh, fine. I'm rolling and unskilled because that's all I've got. Okay. I've got a Ben. Can I roll? You can roll Benny on an unskilled roll. Absolutely. All right. Go for it. If it's better, see if it's worse. It's worse. You have more if you want to roll them. Uh, let's do it.
00:46:23
Speaker
Come on. Let's go. Let's go. Oh, my God. I give up. I give up. I give up. OK. So between a good persuasion role, between a good persuasion role and a bad performance role. Well, you know, Rin wants to be an actress, but she has to learn to act. Yeah. You see, every you see there's like some murmurings about like Rins character and you see like another light turns on on Punkenstein's I'm punk and science cage as the crowd starts to like start to question like, was she really right for the part? I don't know. I mean, she doesn't sound as graceful as Miss Black. um And you hear other guys that are. Huh?
00:47:03
Speaker
Can we see how many lights are turned on like that? So there are six devices on the big ones and four on the little one with Ishis. So you can see that there are six devices total, two of which are blinking on punkies, two of which are blinking on Ishis. Did I say one was turned on on bathies? I can't remember. I don't think so. I don't think so. So bathies are still, she has six that are on there that aren't blinking, and there's two on each of the other cages that are.
00:47:31
Speaker
um So that's what you see. And then everybody goes like, oh, yeah, that's our favorite. You see the guy like doing the cosplay goes, I knew it. I knew that I was popular. And then you see the real punk goes, yes, we three. And he points to him, the points to you, we are a genius.
00:47:47
Speaker
yeah chi is a Um, and then you hear, all right, that was act one concluded. If y'all need to take a break, go, go take a tinkle. There's outhouse trenches that are dug in the back. Uh, just make sure you're back in approximately five minutes for act two. Um, Bella, while that acting is going on, is there anything else that you would like to do while you're standing alongside Martha?
00:48:12
Speaker
Bella's going to ask Martha if she needs to take a break or anything or she wants to take a seat. She kind of wants to sit her in the front row just in case she needs to use her for anything. Uh, yeah, you hear, she says, you know, I, I could, I could sit, I could sit for a spell. You know, my, my old knees ain't what they used to be. And, uh, you know, if, if, could you get me like a chair or, or, or something, uh, Bella? Cause I am, um my joints is hurting.
00:48:39
Speaker
Oh, Ms. Martha, I will absolutely take care of that for you. This way you can sit and you know enjoy the show and watch your boy for his performance. Yeah, okay, yeah. i is Where can I go? Bella's gonna grab a chair from behind one of the scenery sheets and she's gonna go set it right up in front of the stage. And she'll be like, here you go, have a seat right here. And this way, you know,
00:49:07
Speaker
If you're called up to the stage, you are right here and you can get on and you'll know, cause a spotlight will shine down right on you. Oh, I'm nervous. Okay. Um, and she takes a seat and sits down. Uh, do you need to go anywhere or are you going to go anywhere after you have her sit? Um, she's going to go over and I get rent and be like, my baby, you are doing so good. I am so proud of you. Thanks mom. Um, is that why I have two red lights? Does that mean I'm doing really good?
00:49:36
Speaker
Yeah. You just got to follow the script, honey. Okay. Like keep going with that. Keep following the script and everything's going to be fine. I promise. All right. Don't let those boys drag you down though. Yes, baby. A script. I mean, you just have to, you just have to go with it. Okay. Like this is called improv and you know, you kind of have to roll with the punches.
00:49:57
Speaker
But like, I don't even know what the hell is even going. Sorry, Mom. I didn't mean to cuss. I'll forgive you this time, baby. I've missed you so much. I don't know what is going on and I don't even know who this person is. And how am I supposed to like.
00:50:15
Speaker
roll with it if like I don't even know what the heck is going on mom your friends did some terrible things that hurt this person okay and so I didn't do anything to the dog roll cut up freak shut your face you're lucky we couldn't you know can find your mamo okay it's like look
00:50:44
Speaker
This woman's dog died because of their actions and, you know, they did some terrible things. So like I said, you can't really trust them. Um, you know, but everyone is here and this is the way it's going to go. Okay. You guys play your parts and everyone can go home and it's going to be fine and dandy. Nobody's going to have to worry about nothing.
00:51:09
Speaker
Okay, Mom, I'll try, but like, I really don't know what I'm doing up here. If I don't have a script, I don't know how I'm gonna do this, but I'll try. You just got you just gotta to make it up and just be like, you know, what what should you, do if you were in this moment, what would you be doing? Probably smoke trucks.
00:51:28
Speaker
My baby would never, my baby is innocent. Excuse you, Mr. Maverick, okay? Excuse you. My baby girl would never do something like that. She's yeah wonderful. She is so sweet. Exactly. Totally.
00:51:46
Speaker
totally totally no ignore that switch on my chest mom that's a dope it's your for dopamine mom is when you need that dopamine rush it's fine it's just it's just to make me feel good it's depression oppression percolation ah what did else do I say evaporation ah so So you go and you give a little pep talk to Ren. Do you do anything else with her or do you go anywhere else? Do you talk to anyone else? Are you preparing for anything? ah She is, she's going to prepare for a scene where she might be called upon, you know, to act out something. Sure. What scene would that be? What scene are you looking to jump into?
00:52:39
Speaker
That would be the scene of her convincing Cutter and Maverick to leave Finn with her. Or she would convince Cutter and Maverick to leave Finn with her. OK, gotcha. Yeah. All right. And this way they go off. All right. um So so Cutter, while the lights are off and they are changing scenes, you see you've seen that Bella jumps out with your mom and puts her in a chair and is currently talking to Rin.
00:53:08
Speaker
You're still in your dog suit, but people are coming to take that suit off of you now. um And they're putting your hat and stuff back on. You're saying, all right, you're going to be playing yourself in this next scene, Mr. Cutter. All right, great. um I walk away to learn about my mom. ah You go you go over to your mom. She's sitting over in a seat near the front. is She tries to stand up, but her knees are kind of hurting her a little bit. She goes, OK, come here. i haven't seen you but We haven't hugged them. Yeah, stay down. Oh, yeah, here, come on. I missed you greatly, Mama. But again what they they're doing good to you. They're being a bit nasty to you.
00:53:38
Speaker
They heard you. Yeah. Oh, no, not at all. Not at all. They actually we swapped so many fun little stories and I was just I just ki I didn't know that. Why didn't you tell me you were getting into the into the business? I didn't really know. Well, I didn't know. It's going to sound crazy, Mama. I can tell you real quick.
00:53:56
Speaker
This, this people doing this, they ain't quite what they seem. This ain't all quite what it seems. I did something wrong in the past, trying to send you some money. And it looks like this lady, I was one of them wrong. She's a person who got wrong from it, but I'm hoping that maybe we can get, maybe they'll end it all ah peacefully if we do all this acting malarkey here. But, um, as long as they ain't hurting, they ain't hurting you, they're treating you good, mama.
00:54:19
Speaker
Oh, no. Clarence, did I hear that you go by Cutter now? What is that? Clarence is a great name. What does Cutter even mean? You know, I was embarrassed by that name and I don't like carrying his name around, Mom. He was not a good father nor a good husband. Why? Because I named you after your daddy. Yeah, he's not a good... I don't like... You're not a good man. I don't like talking about it. You know, Mom, I don't like talking about it. We deserve, you deserve better, Mom. I don't like, some people snicker when they hear that name and I didn't like it, so.
00:54:52
Speaker
Well, no, I gave you that. I was so happy you had that name because it could because you were you're just so much better. You know, you could make that name good for people instead of making people think it's a bad name. You know, I mean, cutters fine. I suppose. What do you like? What what what is a cutter? Like, what do you do? Like cut down bushes or something? Like, what's it what's that you mean? Well, I was cutting trees one point and, you know, why I guess I was doing a good job. So my fillers was like,
00:55:16
Speaker
Oh, look at cutter over here. Things need some sort of tree cutter. Cause I was trying to get as many as I could. So I could, you know, get a lot of money. I guess we didn't work that way, but I was trying to do a good job. So I could maybe get a raise or something to send you more money. But, uh, yeah, everybody kind of, so really was kind of a joke too, but it sounds cooler than parents.
00:55:35
Speaker
oh I couldn't even say that you never got that smudge by the way, come here. but um yeah And she's like, as she's like cleaning off your face, she's like, she says, you know, I gotta tell you, I mean, is first of all, am I not supposed to call you Clarence then? Cause I'm, I, I, I, that's what the name I gave you. were no you called me You want to be called cutter? No, you call me that moment. out And now you said what you said about it. I feel a little bit better, you know, but it just,
00:56:03
Speaker
That's that's fine. That's why you call me that moment. That's that's your name for me. Yes, that's fine. Well, well, listen, Clarence, I just yeah this lady, she's been real nice to me. um You know, I didn't want to i I was so happy I was going to get to tell you this in person because really having a hard time getting getting getting a hold of you. And so this nice lady, this Miss Black lady, she paid off everything.
00:56:28
Speaker
she She dropped like $3,000 in my lap and then asked me to come and watch your show. Oh, well, that's that's good, Mama. And and get this she and this was and now I do not condone this, but she killed the guys that were holding me up. So it was holding you up. Yeah, there were still debtors that were floating around and trying to. Oh, yeah, of course. Yeah, she she went and hunted them down, made them come and apologize to me. They gave all the money that I did pay them. And then she killed them right in front of me.
00:56:59
Speaker
Which was a little bit graphic. I'm not going to lie. That was very scary for me. But then she said that's what happens to bad people. And, you know, I'm inclined to agree because you and I don't deserve that, Clarence. Yeah. Well, I mean, you know how it is, though, something mom and people. Well, I guess we've got the money now, so I guess maybe it'll all blow over. But it can't be as killing people that we owe debts to then the laws would come after. But I guess I said they got the money. Either way, we're all here anyway. I was going to try and bring you out here, Mama, instead of trying to buy that because i I found some nice land around here, we could maybe make a new home.
00:57:29
Speaker
with my girl there, but it's kind of all going out of the way here. Anyway, anyway I'm glad you're OK. Well, that's all I got to say. Well, I mean, yeah, of course I'm OK. I mean, you know, your mom has got some moves, but ah ah by the way, cutter how much money did you do you think you sent to your mom? Did you track how much you sent her? Hey, oh, no. Like, you said her money. So, huh? I at least sent her a thousand from play. She.
00:57:56
Speaker
She pulls out like a big stack of money, like probably like oh gee if kind for you like fifteen hundred dollars. And she puts it in your hand and she says, this is from everything that you sent me. OK, plus some interest because I know how hard you've been working over here, working for some people that maybe you ain't, you know, too proud to admit that you work for, you know, and this is for you and your girl, you know, go start a good life. You know, I'm happy for you.
00:58:20
Speaker
I'm glad that you're making a life for yourself out here. Clarence? and Thank you, mama. It means a lot to me, but ah why don't you hold on to that for now? just cause um you know i They're going to be making me change my clothes all the time. I can't be having that kind of money flopping around in my pockets and whatnot. ah ah I think that you're going to want to hold on to it. You never know when you're going to need some extra cash. Just tuck it in your britches or something. They ain't going to make you get in your skivvies, are they?
00:58:43
Speaker
No, I don't know. I rightly don't know. Well, I rightly don't know. But ah I just keep it on you. OK, please do for me. I haven't seen you a long time. Just do what I tell you. Do I'm still your mom. All right, mom. And I put it in my I put up my jacket and put it in my front shirt pocket or I open up my vest and put my jacket on to I put in my front shirt pocket. That way, hopefully, if I get stabbed in the heart later, it'll protect me. OK. There you go. Perfect.
00:59:06
Speaker
She says, all right, that a boy? And she says, oh, by the way, that, Bethy, oh, my goodness, she is a delight. I know. I can't believe that. You know, actually, first, first time I met her, she was kind of being a little too forward. me I mean, I was a little bit put off, but, you know, i'm yeah im you know, old fashioned, the kind of kind of way I like to think about court and all of that. But ah she she sort of won me over. And boy, I mean, didn't take a lot of look at the look.
00:59:33
Speaker
She says, you know it's almost 1902. Women can ask out men. That's crazy. yeah we We should be allowed to tell men we think that they're good looking and that they they get us all hot and bothered in our loins. Oh, come on. We you don't even know. That's not me we're talking about. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. it just It's been a while since your daddy lived.
00:59:53
Speaker
Right. I guess whatever. Either way, I got needs too, son. All right. I'm going to go back to my sleeves now. I love you. I love you too, sweetie. I'm going to say I'll be here if you need me. Okay. Be careful. And she just, she says, uh, she, uh, she gets kind of cozy back into her chair. Um, Maverick, is there anybody that you would talk to or anything that you would do before act two starts? I would like to talk to Dr. Pankenstein.
01:00:20
Speaker
You want to just like go up like and look up at the cage that he's in? Yeah, just go look up. So what made you work with her? Huh? Hello? Hello? What? What made you... like Why did you work with her? Am I talking to myself down there? Yes. Hello me. Meet the real me. know No, please stop with the chin again. What was your question? Hello?
01:00:50
Speaker
Hello? Yes. why Why are you part of all of this? Part of what? This spectacular show? Like all the torture devices and everything that you built.
01:01:03
Speaker
fuck yeah That's kind of my thing is like big booms and and crazy experimentations. I mean, you've met my daughters, right? ah Certainly, yeah.
01:01:16
Speaker
And you're surprised. You like to build all of this stuff. You maybe shouldn't put it in like the wrong hands. I mean, what is the right hands, Mr. Maverick? let's try client have I should put your brittle little bones down there. Listen here, nobody can activate these the way that I do. Nobody appreciates the power ah of, well, power aside from me. That's why I got locked here in the first place.
01:01:47
Speaker
Don't worry, I'm going to break out, old chap. I'm going to break free. Don't you worry. So you're saying that Winter can actually activate them herself? Well, I mean, she can. I kind of gave her the doodads up there, kind of like your town, the little doodads up there to flick and turn things on. But I mean, nobody appreciates it the way that I know. I do. Could you deactivate them? I could, but why would I want to? Because so that we don't all get blown up.
01:02:18
Speaker
I mean, I won't get blown up. The moment all these things go off, I'm free. Everything's hunky-dory for you, old boy. That's a very good point. Why not set them all off at once? Break through the barrier, I get to leave. It's perfect. I mean, it's not really perfect for like the rest of us. Oh, did you like? How did you like playing me, by the way? It was certainly an interesting experience.
01:02:43
Speaker
Yes, I guess the cat's out of the bag. I'm surprised that that mumbling Joseph didn't already say something earlier. But yes, a couple of us in doodad are quote unquote, demons. We are, quote unquote, trapped here and it's silly and I hate it. And I'm planning to break free. I don't know about those other two schmucks, but I'm getting out of here. Why are you trapped here?
01:03:08
Speaker
ah be yeah Stay tuned, I suppose. I mean, look at me. I mean, if I were me, I would trap me. Actually, I had me. Should I stay here? Damn. Hmm. No, I think I'm still going to try to escape. Yeah, I think I'm going to do it. Yep. I'm going to live forever. I have so many questions in my head, I don't even know what to ask, so. Oh, do you want to ask some more questions? i Probably don't because so all too much fuckery anyways.
01:03:40
Speaker
Um, and and in that moment, Maverick, Cutter and Rin, you're all standing, uh, Bella too. Actually, you know what? Bella is also there. Maverick, Bella, Rin and Cutter, you're all standing in a laboratory where Punkenstein is sitting in one of his fancy schmancy chairs. Um, a real one like you're in, it feels very real to you. but the hell Um, he says, you're probably wondering why I brought you all here.
01:04:11
Speaker
Did he like suddenly get from like the top to like down to the you guys are just in his lab. OK, you're just there. You don't see the stage. You don't see Vanta Black. You don't see the audience. i read You guys but all four of you are just in his lab. OK. And he says, you're probably wondering why I brought you all here. ah What do you do? I'm very much wondering why.
01:04:41
Speaker
What do you mean, what do I mean? Yeah, what do you mean, dad? Well, hang on. Hello, sweetness. And then he looks over at Bella and he grabs her he grabs her by the hand. Hey, baby. Hello, darling. Oh, I've missed you so much. Oh, yes, I know. Why mustache has been so horny for you?
01:05:03
Speaker
yeah
01:05:06
Speaker
She's just gonna reach up and tweak the ends of his mustache. have' miss touch in this You see like sparks like fly out of his chair.
01:05:18
Speaker
What's going on here? Come on. Oh, all right. I just have you in a state of suspension for a minute so we could talk candidly. So you missed that chatterbox over here. Well, let me enjoy the show. So he keeps talking to me. So if you have any questions, ask it now. Since the cat's out of the bag and everything. Yeah, stupid play. I told her not everybody needed to know. Damn it. Do you want to start, Carter? Um, no. I could probably just send me back. I really don't care to hear anything from you, sir.
01:05:56
Speaker
What's your problem with me anyway? You say what you gotta say. yeah Yeah, make me feel weird. Good. You should feel different. I at least I make you feel something. Yeah, it's the same way to help us. I'm helping you now. Damn it. I mean, we're talking right now. um But more helping than putting us into this like suspension. Fine. What do you want help with? Maybe my beautiful wifey here can help you with something. ah yeah They don't understand. They don't understand anything. I thought you were simping for that Vanta Black. I mean, I was, but then my wifey came back into the picture and obviously one of my hearts belongs to her. Obviously. Have you looked at me? I'm gorgeous.
01:06:53
Speaker
Just give him a spin, darling. Give him a little twirl. He's going to twirl around in a circle with her hands up. like See? yeah I look down and away.
01:07:06
Speaker
could you really the like Hang on, Mr. Maverick. I haven't got a chance to talk to my daughter in a long time. Rinipu, how are you? I know you've changed bodies a couple of times. You doing OK, darling? No, I'm really confused right now, Dad. like what Did you kidnap me on purpose? Like like you could have just told me to come with you and I would have done that. What are you talking about? I didn't kidnap you. Yeah. Well, do you you call this like I'm being held against my will to be some actress thing when you know, dad, I really want to be an actress. But what I secretly really want to do is like turn people into
01:07:52
Speaker
like cyborgs just like me yeah exactly he like he like nudges Bella a chip off the old block do you hear that do you hear what she just said so proud of her you know they grow up so fast just she was to follow it her father's footsteps You see like his mustache like tar starts to look like a little frown, like it's starting to curl downward like handlebars because he's crying into them. He goes, oh, God. Oh, hang on. And he fixes it. He says, well, why didn't you say so? I mean, that's why I wanted you to go and and to help amputate people over at the infirmary so you could get practice.
01:08:33
Speaker
I did dad. I did i have too. It was so good. I know. shout Jeff called me. He told me he did a great job. Oh sure. If Jeff called you cool. Cool. Cool. Cool. Cool. Cool. Yeah. We're friends on the down low. What are we going to do now? Dad? Cause like, I'm very confused as to what's going on. And like, I just need to know what I need to do next. Cause like, I'm ready to go home. Ready to go take a nap.
01:08:59
Speaker
Oh, and that sounds great right now, yes. One moment, darling. Hang on. Mr. Maverick, what were you saying? You were mumbling over there. I'm just very concerned about the whole bombs, Mike, going off, so... That, yes, question. Everybody's afraid of bombs these days. Why? So, because they're very deadly, and if those bombs go off, then you're thought it will also, like, explode. Are you afraid of... of... roses?
01:09:29
Speaker
Roses. Roses, the flower. Are you afraid of those? No. And they have thorns and you could get cut and get an infection and die. But no one says, oh, no, roses.
Trapped in a Fake World
01:09:40
Speaker
That's why you gotta handle roses with some care so you don't poke yourself with them. Nobody else has a thousand roses around my girlfriend's cage. He says, I'm going to stab her with a bunch of roses. I say, I'm going to blow her up. This lady is going to blow my girlfriend up.
01:09:54
Speaker
Now, to be fair, everyone's going to be blown up, not just your girlfriend. Well, that's only what I want. I really care about. I mean, I care about everybody. You two never ran my mom. Well, I mean, I was planning on taking you with me. Where the hell? No, to leave to get out of here. Oh, OK. OK. Could you like take everyone with you?
01:10:19
Speaker
I can. And then you kind of hear you hear a chef start to talk and chef. He's like all of a sudden in the room with you. He says, now, you know, he could take you. He's just being an asshole and won't. And where the hell would even take us? Well, where we want to go with him. He wants to leave the limbo and he doesn't want to take me or Joe. Joe can't even leave his house. The house he's stuck in.
01:10:46
Speaker
So if you're gonna blow anything up, go blow up where Joe is so he can leave too. And here like you just see, like, Punkenstein just furiously shaking his head back and forth. Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. nope nope but One time I finally agree with... He's just, like, furiously shaking his head. His mustache is, like, clacking against his chair. Nope, not happening. Never doing it. Nope, no nope, don't nope, nope, nope. What do you do?
01:11:11
Speaker
you So you could take us all with you and you would do that because you're a very nice demon man, right? He's she like Bella's laughing protocol gets turned on. You see he starts to laugh. You see ah like you see chef. He starts to giggle and they're just like laughing hilariously at the fact that you call him a nice guy. So I'm just like, yes, of course. Right. of course Yes. Right.
01:11:42
Speaker
Uh, then you, you hear chef, he chimes in and says, look, I've heard the news. The cat's out of the bag. Me, Joe, and Punky here are all trapped here. None of what you see is real, okay? This is just a world that Joe came up with to fill it with more people so it would be less lonely, okay? None of you are technically even real people. You're all trapped in a thing that we all thought of because we're trapped here, because our brothers and sisters are jerks, because they just thought that we were too much apparently, okay?
01:12:18
Speaker
That is so dope. She like fist pumps. She goes, you know, I feel like your original self would have celebrated the same way. I should have told you sooner. Yeah.
01:12:32
Speaker
And then you see, like, ah Bella, all of this, like, starts to make sense to you right away, like, now that they're talking about it, everything inside of your protocol, everything inside of your brain, like, you know, that pumpkin science programmed you to just know this when it was time for you to know it. And now you know everything.
01:12:50
Speaker
Um, so like as they're talking, like and you know you've known this the whole time that like all three of them are representations of wrath, which is who Joe is. You know that lust is who, uh, punkenstein is, and you know that gluttony is who chefy is.
01:13:07
Speaker
And all of their brothers and sisters thought they were going to cause too much havoc and trap them into a fake rendition of a cowboy world. And then Mutt and Chop Joe made up the rest of it so he would have company because he's the worst of them all and got trapped in a house that he cannot leave.
01:13:21
Speaker
Um, so you know, all of that. And he's been so like made so docile by the spell that he can't even really be wrathful anymore. Um, so, uh, and Sheffield usually under most circumstances can't leave the brothel, but he has found a loophole every so often. He can leave it for a short amount of time, but much job. Joe has never been able to find a way to leave the phony express.
01:13:47
Speaker
um So you know everything. Everything about like what this is and how this is a fake world. You know that Frankenstein told all of this to Vanta when she kind of had him under her kind of like affections and just he just spilled the beans, which led her to change her whole entire plan of instead of like, because nothing matters now. She just learned that like nothing she knows is real.
01:14:11
Speaker
You know everything. Everything is true. Everything that they're saying is true, OK? Like, I know you guys don't want to believe this, but none of this is even real to begin with. Granted, we're all doing a play right now, but it's not real. This isn't a real world. You know, this does feel very real to me, which is certainly, I think, the most important thing. But what if this is a fake world? What is the real world?
01:14:40
Speaker
somewhere none of us have ever been yes well i mean i know but none of you guys have been there yes you're exactly right pumpkin does the real world look at like our world what sorry you were interrupting my kissy time with my wife what'd you say i said does the real world look like our world or is it like really different Oh, it's rad. It's way different. Although, you know, there are some things that you have here that didn't technically happen at the same time there, but it doesn't matter. I mean, this can be fun for you. I just don't want to be here anymore. You can hang out here with wrath all day. I don't care. I don't like it anymore. I want to leave. Could we like help you leave like altogether? Because I want you to blow up this whole place. We blow everything up. That's what we do.
01:15:31
Speaker
So we blow everything up and you make sure that everyone arrives and we leave with you? I didn't say that. I just said we
Internal Conflicts and Relationships
01:15:38
Speaker
blow everything up and then I leave. You should have went and stolen the Slender's Canyon mine, motherfucker. Send me back to the goddamn play.
01:15:44
Speaker
OK, but so so you hear a chef, he says, who I suppose. And then all of you guys come around. All of you guys are back at the play. ah Bella, you are standing ah near Rinn as you guys were talking and you're getting ready for going on stage. Cutter, you just find yourself you're back to walking away from your mom. Maverick, you are standing underneath the cage looking up at punk and science cage yelling up to him trying to talk to him. um Bella, I already mentioned Bella. All of you guys are back to the places that you were as they're getting you ready for Act Two. So, Cutter, what do you do? I just stand where I was. You stand where you were and do you do anything? Do you say anything? Do you talk to anybody? No, I just got his arms crossed looking down at the ground. um He's just looking down at the ground. You hear Bella, you hear Bathie yells from her cage. She goes,
01:16:42
Speaker
Cut her, what's going on? Why you look so glum? Oh, just nervous about the show, that's all, Bathe. Oh? You know I can tell that you're lying to me. Well, like guess I guess I'll hop down and go over to her little cage. Well, Bathe, we just had a weird little chitty chat with Plungestan over there, and he told us a bunch of weird stuff. I'll get out of this, maybe I'll tell you about it, but it's got a lot on my mind right now. and Uh, you know, my mom's here as a whole bunch of things going on. And, uh, yeah, there's just a lot going on. I, uh, be easy to tell you later, I guess, but, uh, we just gotta get you out of this cage for now. I guess. What do you think is going on? Why are you in this cage?
01:17:29
Speaker
Why am I in the cage? Oh, Miss Black paid us a lot of money and said that this is all a big show and it was supposed to help you and your friends kind of reach a new level of appreciation of life and and and to really raise your stock around this place. And I thought, well, I got to get in on that to help, you know, I imagine, you know, maybe we'll get married someday. So, you know, I want you to feel really good and confident and, you know, make a lot of money so we can have a nice wedding. That's nice, Beth.
01:17:59
Speaker
Yeah, I'm sorry. I didn't tell you, but she said that it was supposed to be a surprise and she was very convincing. And, and she, she, you know, I know that you told me kind of what you did, you know, with the whole stagecoach thing, you know, and I'm not, I'm not upset with you about that. I know that you feel bad for what you did and you didn't know that you were killing a dog. Yep. You're right. So, I mean, what do you want to do? Where are you at in all of this? What, what makes cutter the happiest? How can I help? If you don't want to do this anymore, I'll bust out of here right now.
01:18:27
Speaker
I don't, don't try that. I don't want you blowing up. Uh, why would I blow up? Well, you see his little things all around the box here is and this lady and quite what she's, it's a whole, it's she more mad about it than she plays off to be, I suppose. But, uh, so man, that dynamite does to pick it up on me. Sorry. Uh, uh, there's Lee that box there, that box there, that box. Those are all explosive things. Pungestan made.
01:18:54
Speaker
He's trying to, I'll just tell you, he's a yeah demon. Mutt and Chop Joe is a demon. Chef, he's a demon. Nice for a demon. um And yeah, I killed a dog on an accident indirectly. um A nice lady doctor died too. I tried to help make sure she lived with one of them sons of bitches. I don't remember which one killed her. Back at the stagecoach thing. That was pretty rough. And then Osman died not too long after. That was that was rough. You know about that.
01:19:23
Speaker
for sure. um a Yeah. Munchup, or no, Munchup, the other one that weirds me out, Punkenstein, and he thinks he's going to blow up and have some sort of euphoric explosion eruption into ah some other place. He tells me this is his prison. ah him and them or Him and the other ones are trapped. He wants to blow up and get out of here, so he's hoping this all works out um in his favor of exploding and everybody else dying. So that's kind of why I'm not too happy right now, Beth.
01:19:53
Speaker
Oh, and you believe all that? I mean, I remember you said before in your sleep a couple of times, you were saying something about demons and sloth one time and Abaddon and there are words I've never even heard you say before. You know, are you sure that yeah that this isn't just like a dream you're having or or i ah hopes? Maybe I don't know, maybe, but um I just say, yes, I mean, i and so this was weird things that happened to me badly since I've been out here working for Mutton Chopper. So I got to say, and Just hoping this ain't going to be another weird thing. I mean, it certainly sounds like a weird thing. Yeah. Are you are you is there anything I can do to help you feel better? um No, just keep in here. Be careful. Be quiet. Be calm. I'll try and do this whole acting thing so we can all get out of here nice and easy and alive. Hopefully she'll stick to her word with the whole play thing.
01:20:49
Speaker
Oh, OK. I mean, like I said, I want to take the lame duck poem back in when we're done. Oh, I've never been up there. It's nice. We'll take. Well, I'll take all of them back. I was going to go back because, you know, that's where he died and he's buried. But they dug him up to throw at me. And so I got to take him back.
01:21:08
Speaker
He's a muttonchop. I figured I was the best place we could grow a soul with a dead body. It was that gross old motherfucker. Sorry, I said the second time I said motherfucker, I ain't used to that kind of stuff. I'm frazzled. I don't like being frazzled. My mom's gonna wash your mouth out with soap if you don't wash your mouth. Oh my god, Ren, you are, how old are you, 16? Start to rebel. No. I'll get in trouble.
01:21:34
Speaker
Jesus, it's a crime of any. Uh, I'm going to walk away about this. I love you. See you later. All right. I love you too, sweetie. But, you know, just whenever you need me to pull the plug on this, you just, I don't know what that means, but come get me. All right. Yeah. Um, so you walk away from Bathie. Um, Maverick, you were standing underneath Punkenstein's, uh,
01:21:59
Speaker
Cage, the lights are going to come on here in a minute. What do you do now that you've heard all that stuff? from the convention I don't think I've heard frazzled before. Never heard the word frazzled? No. Oh. But so I think and I mean, I think in German it's it's frauselt. Oh, frazzled are just like we're like you're kind of like confused and kind of wigged out at the same time. We're just you're kind of like unsure what to do just because there's so much going on. Um, frazzled is just like a gentler way of saying like you're just kind of overall confused and kind of anxious about it. Freaking out, man.
01:22:36
Speaker
I'm frazzled. You're all frazzled. So what does Maverick do? I like yell up to a punk sign. Okay, so we got a deal, right? What? We got a deal, right? That we just talked about. Which deal? The deal of you like taking everyone with you.
01:23:01
Speaker
um Oh, look, a distraction. Huh? What's that? Hmm. Sorry, I'm getting a call, Mr. Maverick. I can't answer your question. Sorry, my cage is going through a tunnel. um um And he just starts making noise like, and I was ex-plan deal. um As he just starts making noises with his mouth. Ravey the Raven starts.
01:23:31
Speaker
You'll massage my what? Hello, what do you say? can
01:23:36
Speaker
Do you say you'll massage my tootsie toes? But, yeah, I guess I'll just go back to the stage. Wait, did you say you're going to massage my feet? Maybe. He has this thing about toes, dad, it's weird. Yes.
01:23:53
Speaker
Yes, it is tell them my secret. You see, I know it was awesome. Maybe the weird like
Vanta's Emotional Breakdown
01:24:00
Speaker
flies down and lands on your shoulder and says, you say weird. Hi, I'm still here. Hi, welcome back. Oh, hi. Hey, hi. Sorry, I was looking for more eyeballs to eat, but turns out that people don't want you to eat them if they're still in their face and they're alive. Yeah, probably not. No. Yeah, I'm i'm learning. Yeah, you are. Good job.
01:24:20
Speaker
Uh-huh. Thanks. Um, anyway, where's your mom? Uh, she's over there. Oh. Is she nice? Is she still nice, like from before? Oh, she's the nicest, most prettiest woman in the whole world. Oh. Neat. Okay. Um, and he says, I'm gonna go say hi to her. And then he flies up in the air and then glides over there. Bella, what are you doing while this is all happening?
01:24:49
Speaker
She's just staring at punk and sign and just lovingly and I'm going to get you free, baby. I will make them help you. I don't care. You deserve to be free. Even if I don't get to go with you, I'll always be in one of your hearts. So um I saw that you're on an athletics role. Was that on purpose?
01:25:11
Speaker
No, that was an accident. Okay, I was gonna say you're rolling for something because you succeeded pretty heavily. what are you that She's stretching. She's stretching. you stretching she her to Do something? Yeah, know she's stretching, you know, getting all limbered up. Excellent. um And then you guys start to hear an announcement on on the speakers. And you see, um Vanta steps out of the darkness again as the lights come on. She says,
01:25:38
Speaker
OK, I'm not stupid. I recognize there's something freaky is going on here. So why don't we just change up the show a little bit, shall we? um And then you you see, she like repels down. She's like clasp like a a rope to um to the side of the building and just like fucking just repels are going out.
01:25:58
Speaker
lands beautifully, barely kicking up any dust as she hits the ground. um And she walks up and she reveals that she's got like two silver guns, two silver pistols on her hip um and ah on and on holsters on either side. um And she walks up and she climbs atop the stage very gracefully and She says, all right, new scene. Who wants to be in it? And she starts looking around around the the stage, like looking at all of you guys to see who's going to step up. Rin's like you excitedly like waving like me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. She's still like not even like she realizes this isn't real. So she's like, whatever, I'm having fun with this. All right, get up here. Yes, that walks up. Cutter walks up. Yeah. Can I walk on through?
01:26:48
Speaker
Yeah, absolutely. Bella, do you come and walk on roll? Bella is coming up too. Bella comes up. You see also Martha gets up and hobbles very like she's wobbling. trying like walk her back um she's but She's going to help hold on to Martha and like give her some support as she walks. So you and cutter both like hold on to her. back i from a away with but me like I know you're kind of being peaceful right now, but put your hands on my mama.
01:27:14
Speaker
Hey, I have done nothing wrong to you. I have only helped you. I don't remember if Ren told, I think Ren told me you what she was saying. I don't know who told you say those things about us. Did I not tell you how to get to Bathie? Did I not tell Maverick how to find Ishi? No, you told us to go to the wrong place, I think. Yeah, exactly. It was all a part of the show.
01:27:39
Speaker
That doesn't help anything. I like the show. Hey, hey, hey, hey, Clarence, come on. It is it belly has been nothing but a sweet pea to me. Well, as as I told you, urban and nobody's real what they seem to be. And I just want you to sit down and be comfortable and just be calm. I don't want you to go into her name. None of the weirdness. What are we doing here? She said I could, she said, she said I could be in the show.
01:28:03
Speaker
Well, that's something she should not be telling you because you ain't going to be in no show because it's dangerous. ah Mama, there's all kind of threats. No, Martha, you can be in the show, OK? Well, I'll give you get you. Why don't you guys roll a persuasion off to see who wins to see how they can convince what what Martha should do?
01:28:24
Speaker
but she listen to her baby boy where she listened wow a seven from bella a 15 from cutter and yeah so umism just ropes hanging and stuff they they're gonna be dropping props and things fake guns we're gonna go on probably so Martha squeezes your hand Bella and says ah Yeah, I really do. I just didn't have the heart to tell you. I'm just too, my heart's beating so fast about going up on stage, but I really do appreciate all the kindness and and and the and the belief that you have in me. But respectfully, I really would just like to listen to my boy. I haven't seen him in a while. Can I please just sit sit my little bones down and just watch the big show? Yeah, come on. Of course, Martha. You want to sit down, you have a seat, and you relax. yeah that' Thank you. I look it um like about like i guess like a shitty look. Thank you, Bella, for being so kind. I let my momma sit down.
01:29:13
Speaker
Come clo on, I'd take her right down the stairs and look over my shoulder. like All right, so you sit her back down. She gives you a little kiss on the cheek. um And then she's like, go get him. um And she she nestles back into her seat as you guys go back up on stage. Do you guys do you say anything to Bella on your way back? No. would you say anything to way back No, I I've only been tried to help you.
01:29:39
Speaker
Not my fault, you're stubborn and don't want to listen.
01:29:46
Speaker
So you guys walk back up on the stage, you see Vanta Black is there. She's standing in almost like a dual stance. She says she looks up and she said looks at the blinking lights and then she pulls out like a little gizmo.
01:30:00
Speaker
on her ah out of her pocket and just like presses like ah a button, like a bunch of times. And you just see all but one of each light starts to blink red on all of the cages up there on with Ishii. Ishii's still whistling away. She's having a time of her life. she's She's whistling. She's swinging on a little swing in there, of occasionally pruning herself. But you see all the other things light up and you hear Bathie, she yells out, she goes, cut her, are these the bombs? Are these the bombs?
01:30:29
Speaker
Keep calling, Betty. You're all right. She's like, hell no. but if i'm up If I'm about to blow up right now, I need i have things I need to say. Well, bear to me. we'll we'll Don't be yelling em across. and You know how I feel about people not earning my business. if she's like you were i but you met her She's like, you really gave it to me good two weeks ago, Connor. You gave it to me good.
01:30:52
Speaker
I'm like, actually, i like ied I look around like, you know, I'm pretty good. She's like, if I gave it to me, good. I mean, like you read a whole book front to back and I'm so proud of you. Yeah, I'm pretty. odd giga I think you're pretty good at
01:31:11
Speaker
um And so Vanta looks at you all and she says, well, I guess that we're all improvising now, aren't we? So she looks she like she's like staring daggers at cutter and she's like, so you and your little scale friend decided to take out my doctors and make sure that my veterinarian didn't make it to me. And then my little boy, Duke, passed away of a bunch of gut issues that could have been solved if we had that medicine. What was so important? Why did you need to take it? I'm sure you already know I was just trashing home money home back my mom. She didn't lose her home.
01:31:46
Speaker
um And I'm sure, you know, I've felt terribly ever since and that doesn't mean nothing to you. So even if you didn't think that the world didn't matter anymore, it's alive. I was almost here. It's like, Duke, Duke, you sound tinier than I remember. she shit um Yeah, I mean, I am sorry. I didn't. I should never have done it. I mean, like you see done it either way, but roll of persuasion with a plus one.
01:32:17
Speaker
He got 14, 15, 14, 15. So just like mama. She's she's she's she kind of like you see like she looks a little disarmed for a minute. um Like she's kind of like you see her posture kind of like slouches a little bit and she's like. Well, I'm not going to lie, Clarence Cutter, whatever you want to be called. That was unexpected. My name is Clarence.
01:32:45
Speaker
And you're like, your mom, your mom is like cheering. She's like, it's like, it's my boy right there. Yeah. Clarence, Clarence O'Toole. Um, and, um, she's like, well, as I said, that was unexpected. Uh, gotta be honest with you. I had a lot of other mean things I was going to say to you. And now a little uncertain about where to direct my rage at the moment.
01:33:10
Speaker
um She looks over to you, Bella, and she's like, well, I mean, you saw he was kind of a shit heel, right? What? Say something. Look, he's only been, you know, trying to help others. You can't really fault him for that. I mean, he was unaware of this medication going to save your baby, Duke. What? What? She's like she's like growing flustered in her cheeks, her cheeks are turning red. She's like, oh,
01:33:41
Speaker
And she looks over at Ren. She says, Ren, he he abandoned you. He hates your father. He I mean, right. He's a bad guy. He he killed a dog. he He robbed an innocent person. He killed one of my bodyguards when I was portraying ah Lady Danes. Right. He's he's a bad guy. Sounds like all accidents to me.
01:34:07
Speaker
do You're supposed to be listening to me. You're one of the crazy guys, robot children. Why? What? And like she's getting like real flustered. So ah Bella and Ren, both you roll a persuasion rolls, please with a plus two. Okay. Seven. Seven for Ren.
01:34:28
Speaker
I didn't have a plus two, but yes. That's okay. That's an 11 from Bella. Jesus. And you see, she's like increasingly flustered and she like, she takes one of her guns out and just like throws it off the stage, like in a fit. And she's like, I just, no, this is not how this is supposed to go. Although it doesn't even matter. None of this is real.
01:34:49
Speaker
News flash. And she looks over to you, Maverick. She's like, you're a bounty hunter. You are a bounty hunter. He is a bad man. He has killed good people, innocent people, an innocent dog. Aren't you supposed to lock him up? He robbed a stagecoach. You know, run around with him. Justice and being like a bounty hunter or a policeman isn't all about just punishing the bad. It's also about giving a chance to like be better again, to become better people.
01:35:19
Speaker
But he should shoot him or put him in jail at least. Tie him up. Can Rin go to Vanta for a hug? baby be as much I was about to be like, I had to buckle my gun belt and say, wait, I'm going to do something here. we We do it at the same time. You just see, it as you're thinking that, Rin, you hear clank. My gun belt drops to the floor. I'm like, I'm sorry about your dog.
01:35:46
Speaker
so just and we most this ah Yeah, before you do that, ah Maverick, roll a ah roll of persuasion with a plus three.
01:35:58
Speaker
Persuasion. Yeah, that's an eight. So she like takes off her other gun and just whips it off the stage and she's like holding on to her head. She takes her hat off and throws it to the ground. It's a beautiful hat, though, probably like a three hundred dollar hat. She just chucks it on the ground.
01:36:14
Speaker
We watch Maverick just dive off the stage.
01:36:20
Speaker
but like more he You it down in like a whole like a whole suit of armor like like falls out of it. It's like some Iron Man shit. um And she just throws her hat to the to the to the floor in front of her and she's just like. i And she sees you guys kind of approach you goes, what's happening? What are you doing? It's hard to go.
01:36:44
Speaker
Are you also going to go in for? all Are you all three going to go in for a hug? Yes. Roll for a hug. Roll spirit for a hug. Wow. 13 for Ren. I've only got five. Five for Cutter. You have a bunch of bennies. You have a thousand bennies. Never ever deny the power of a hug. Yeah. So Bella, do you get in on the hug?
01:37:11
Speaker
Bella's gonna get it on the hug too. Okay, roll a spirit roll. And you also have Benny's if you want. Oh, 22! Holy shit! it's true role What the fuck?
01:37:26
Speaker
I mean, are y'all doing that? Is are you guys doing any sort of like shady shit like the tricker? Are you guys just coming in and just like surround group? pugging So my idea was that I was going to um do a havoc, but and do it in a reverse. So instead of something bad coming out of her, she's going to switch something on her chest on on her dial where it says DOP. There's also a rainbow ah emoji that she blips it to. And it just like makes this um like happiness emission out of her body and just creates just ah whatever um bad feelings that she feels or what sad feelings she feels, she feels better.
01:38:20
Speaker
Yeah, so there's just big this beautiful hug happens in a moment, like all of you clasp around Vanta, clasping around each other, giving this warm embrace, just like you hear like some soft celebratory music start to play, and then um it sounds like kiddie poop. No. No. Tender as-ma-me-ta. It sounds like just like you just hear kiddie kiddie poop. You go around here, you hear like this kind of slow rising celebratory music starts to play. Rainbows and butterflies start to fly around. This sun starts to shine around you like daytime has come. um And everybody is greeted by this warm.
01:39:09
Speaker
Huh? And you're all still alive. And you're all still alive right now. um the sun The sun rises. Everybody feels this warm glow upon them um as you guys are embracing. And Vanta is just like,
01:39:24
Speaker
like just like you see like she's like visibly like she's she is fighting back like a smile but i think it's because like you have allowed her Rin to release all this pent up rage that she has been feeling since she lost everybody in her life and you guys start to feel her presence as you see images in her mind of like a famous desperado who used to rob and kill and pillage, settles down, has a beautiful daughter um named Maribel, and you recognize that too, this girl really is. And you see her mom and have a beautiful life, and then you see her mom kills her dad, and then she kills her mom out of it and ah as an act of vengeance and preservation. And all she's ever had left for all her life is her little dog, Duke.
01:40:13
Speaker
and losing him was like a breaking point for her and you feel all of her rage starts to dissipate as then she talks to punkenstein and learns that nothing that she has encountered in her whole entire life is even real and she just has this like desperation to find purpose in a world that means nothing and you have allowed her to just like open her heart and just wash that out and she's like visibly just weeping on your shoulder as you guys are hugging her and then like you feel like the warmth start to come up to her and she kinda smiles for the first time at what probably feels like forever and she just kinda like relaxes and the music dissipates the light goes away for a little while and then you see some very snarky son of a bitch up in the up in the light tower shines a big spotlight on all of you guys with darkness all around you everything else goes black and it's just a spotlight what do you guys say to her? ah Ren we'll start with you what do you say to Vanta?
01:41:06
Speaker
See if anything you could be an amazing movie director and that would give you purpose and then you already have all of these amazing actors and all of these amazing sets and you could like do amazing things with this. um Maverick what do you say to her?
01:41:29
Speaker
Life doesn't have to be all about hate. it's Hate is certainly in an emotional feel, but it shouldn't be completely controlled by it. That is also other, like, more pleasant feelings. So you shouldn't drown them out with all the hate. Bella, what do you say to Vanta?
01:41:48
Speaker
So Bella's just gonna look her in the eye and be like, you know, you could start all over if you wanted. I mean, look at everything you've done, everything you've set up. You could make your own dinner theater type situation. I mean, you've already got multiple towns taken over, and then you can start over and find your own happiness. And maybe there's a new Duke waiting for you because Duke wouldn't want you to be this way, okay? He would want you to be happy.
01:42:14
Speaker
And, you know, maybe it was just Duke's time to just move on. Carter, what do you say to Vanta? I'm, I'm sorry, Mirabelle. I guess we learned her name and that magic magic thing. You did. That's all I say. Um, anyway, it's the tier of his own away.
01:42:34
Speaker
You see Ravi, the weird lands on top of her shoulder and just says, hi. um And ah she looks over it at Ravi and says, well said. Well said.
Escape Plans and Final Decisions
01:42:46
Speaker
um And she kind of looks around all of you guys and says, yeah, I don't. I guess you're all right. I'm sorry. And then she's she just kind of looks at you guys real quick and just says,
01:43:03
Speaker
Well, I don't I don't know if I deserve all those nice things that y'all said. But yeah, I guess there's always a way to start off and just live more positively, even though nothing in this life is real. Who's to say? I mean, Maverick, I heard you say earlier that, you know, as you were kind of spouting nonsense at Punkenstein over there, that you felt like life was pretty real to you. Yeah. And everybody deserves a second chance.
01:43:31
Speaker
Like, it might be a fact that this life is like, in quotations, not real. But as long as this feels real to us, then that's the most important thing.
01:43:43
Speaker
yeah And you you hear like from topside, you hear just like, oh, God, this is so beautiful. I'm sorry. And you see just like punk signs like busts out of his cage like on his like high powered fucking like zoomy chair and just like it rockets himself down to the stage. And then you see like he presses like a bunch of buttons on his chair and and like Bathy and Ishii are released from their cages and and and drop down.
01:44:10
Speaker
Ishii flies out and then up in the spotlight she looks beautiful and sparkly because she has rainbows and butterflies and glitter flying off of her and she lands on she lands on Maverick's shoulder and gives him a little nuzzle on his cheeks and then... I was supposed to imagine, well she's like up there, Maverick's like like motherfucker he black hands to his cheeks like wow!
01:44:33
Speaker
And then Bathie gets lowered down um and she comes running up and she's she's in a beautiful dress and her hair is kind of slightly curled. And she she runs up and gives Cutter a big old hug. um As you guys are all standing on stage together. um eric what do you a cutter What do you say to Bathie?
01:44:55
Speaker
I just hug her and I so i say, mama, come up here and meet the love of my life. You see your mom stands up and like Sonic the fucking hedgehog and like runs up and just like like yeah like impossible for an old woman like that to move that fast. But somehow she's like six. She does like six cartwheels in a backflip and lands up there. Myself. Yeah, she's like she finds the strength to run up there for her, you know, with the last bout of strength she's been saving.
01:45:26
Speaker
um um And Vanta says. Well, I mean, if it's ah if I guess if we're just trying to make our own purpose with all this place, where do we go from here? And she just looks around at you guys like just kind of seemingly like she's really lost. She doesn't seem doesn't know what she's doing. I mean, let's rebuild the town. Well, sure. I got these fixed, I think.
01:45:51
Speaker
Yeah, well I mean, I already kind of started putting people on that. I mean, I was just gonna make it look nicer. They already started rebuilding it when y'all left. Sweet. I wasn't looking to punish anybody but you, Cutter. That was just a stunt. Well, what about the people in the forest, though?
01:46:10
Speaker
Oh, dave I don't know why everybody made such a big deal out of that. I know that was probably the most realistic part of what we did, but they're fine. They're on vacation right now. They went to someplace they want to see called Transylvania. I don't know what that is, but they really wanted to go. Can we go? I mean, I guess you can do whatever you want. I just gave you all like a bunch of money, didn't I? I gave at least Martha a bunch of money. Not me.
01:46:35
Speaker
or how much you want. Shit, I got like a whole pocket full of it. And she's like, reaches into her pockets and just like $100 bills are like spilling out of it. How much do you need? i She looks at her mom and her dad. And she's like, um all of it? You want all of the money that I have in my pockets right now? No, you can keep it. My mom and dad have plenty of money. It's fine. um She looks over at you, Bella, and she's like, I mean, do y'all need money?
01:47:05
Speaker
he i don't I don't, you know, if you need some, I got it. No, I mean, why don't you put it to good use, okay? Like, I was really honest about that dinner theater idea because seriously, you can get a big crowd coming in here. Yeah. And, you know, you can put on a performance. You can even do like a murder mystery thing. Yeah, I agree. Wonderful. And everybody would just come from all over to come and take part in this play and, you know, just have so much fun. Yeah. You know, you've got a million dollar idea here. You know, maybe,
01:47:34
Speaker
Maybe, you know, I was looking at the at the real estate over there and do that. And, you know, that brothel is pretty huge. Maybe I could maybe help you all run it and maybe we could turn it into a dinner theater show and a place where people can get their rocks off. There's not anything left of Mr. Of ah but matching carpets. No, but it could be ground up. It's getting rebuilt right now. I already told you they're already rebuilding it.
01:47:59
Speaker
Oh, they are actually they actually are rebuilding it. Oh, yeah. Oh, he's rebuilding that. I already paid him to do it. It was just a publicity stunt. Oh, I thought you meant everywhere else, but there. because i mean Oh, no, no. Yeah. No, I was going to say we could rebuild it, make it even better. Oh, good. OK.
01:48:21
Speaker
um You know, as a player character right now I'm like, or even as Merrick, I'm pretty like confused and like, what was it, frazzled?
01:48:33
Speaker
rezl ah like I was certainly like still had the intent to like kill this person. ah But now she told me that like all people in the force alive, and I kind of do believe that. I'm like also kind of similar to have like second thoughts now. Do we really need to kill her? Yeah, you to kind of conflict it. Yeah. Yeah. um So as you guys are talking, you hear like Punkenstein's next to you now and like all the crowd, like, as you can see, the crowd, they're like, they're leaning forward. They're like into this. Like they think this is all part of the show. They're like fucking like their their mouths are agape at like how this plot has turned. um And Punkenstein looks you on and says, well, I know this is all hunky dory and everything, but um I really do want to get the hell out of here. So um
01:49:31
Speaker
I'm sorry, but I still need to blow something up so I can leave. So... Why don't you just go somewhere else and blow something up where there's not a lot of people? and I mean, the bombs are already here and they're mostly set. You know how long that's going to take me to redo all of that? Why don't you wait a few years? I hear there's some fellers up in Manhattan, they're cooking up some sort of project.
01:49:55
Speaker
I don't know when the fuck that was. Probably well after this, but... It absolutely was. That was like... but World War... What? to when that when the Manhattan Project was starting to be work. Who can who can say? um But ah nothing.
01:50:13
Speaker
It's when Dr. Manhattan, the superhero from the from the watchmen were made, was made. So he says Pakistan, you got you got all kind of deserts out here. Just go out and some of the stuff, take them in the middle of the desert, blow yourself up if you want to leave your bales out of it.
01:50:33
Speaker
let's be and ren one
Reflections and New Beginnings
01:50:34
Speaker
I will go with you. I will gladly go with you. her You're going to come with me? Always. I'll always go with you. Really? Oh, hi I did. I was just going to go alone. I just figured nobody, you know, you'd want to stay in your little fantasy land.
01:50:53
Speaker
I want to be with my husband. ah Who else is going to tweak that stash the way I do? Oh, fucking a. um who So he looks at you he looks at you and then he says, I mean, are you do you do you and and your sisters want to come to ah ah what? Well, I definitely want to take Finn with me, for sure.
01:51:19
Speaker
Oh, right. You got to go. Damn it. You got to go get your little sister first. She's not even here. Yeah. Shit. Um, so you, so you're saying to him, you want to go with him, but take Finn too. Yeah. So teen ran is going to go with pumpkin Stein. So he says, well, all right, you better go hop on your motor horse and go get your sister, I suppose. Okay.
01:51:45
Speaker
Put the note, just, all right, make sure you wear your helmet. Do not drive that without a helmet. She's armed, like, taking off, running, like, towards Bella's motorcycle. Like, you didn't have to say nothing, but it takes him a motor horse, and she was gone. He's like shaking his fist. He goes, robot-rin!
01:52:07
Speaker
Dad, who taught you to be rebellious? You did. Yeah, I'm pretty sure she learned that from you, darling. What? Hypocrisy. Heresy. Other words. okay okay Let me calm you down. I'm going to tweak that stash of yours.
01:52:26
Speaker
um
01:52:31
Speaker
So he looks and he says, all right, who else is coming with me when the bomb blows? I need to know that way. I know who gets eviscerated and evaporated and who doesn't. I look down on the way. What about you, old man? Not me. No. Really? You would rather stay here and die than come with me and see what the real world looks like? I'm pretty like fine with this world right now.
01:52:57
Speaker
I'd fine. I mean, I guess as long as Wrath is still here, the world will still exist. I'm not taking Sheffi with me. Glust sucks, and I don't want them with me. I might... No, I'm Lust. I do suck, though, in a good way. Glutney sucks. Glutney sucks, and they are not coming with me. All that what I want to talk about is goulash all day. They've been bamboozled by this fake world Wrath made. So as long as you're fine with me leaving them with you, I don't want them here.
01:53:23
Speaker
Yeah, it's fine. But I want to like take her to like a little bit away and like have a talk with him. All right. You guys step away while Mutt and Chuck or while while Punky is getting his his rocks off with. with i I go. I go. I'm right back, Matthew. Mama, don't talk to that man over there.
01:53:43
Speaker
ah Okay, dear I was just I was just you know, wow, they're really wow he his wow his tongue is like disappeared into her mouth Oh my goodness. don't you Look at what he's doing mom. He's a freak. I ain't been go I ain't been kissed like that since I was in my 20s All right, mom. Well, hey, there's a lot of nice older gentlemen around this town area. We'll maybe we'll find out when they were in the land Oh, so is he a my mom, I'll be right back. He says, I'm a nice gentleman. Everybody's going to be your new daddy. exactly We won't talk about Maverick. How are you feeling about all that?
01:54:21
Speaker
i Do we want to still accept vengeance? Or are we all good now? I'm very confused. I guess we gotta wait and see if people really ain't dead in the forest of your friends. Otherwise, I mean, everything... I mean, I'm glad we ended peacefully. Everybody's fine, I guess. This whole journey was all... Even if nobody died, it was rather unpleasant, but I think for that I'm willing to forgive.
01:54:50
Speaker
Yeah, me too. I mean, we think we both grew as persons, you know, so. Yeah. i He's a a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a he's a I mean, that doesn't sound the worst thing that I could do. I mean, yeah. And she said she really seems keen on, you know, finding a new man. And I trust you the most as anybody I don't know around these areas to take care of her. So. Yeah. I mean, that's not but what a bad idea.
01:55:41
Speaker
You see, like, only if you like her, I'm trying to force her on you. But yeah, you see, you see, she's like on your shoulder and she's like nudging you and like pointing whatever feathers over at his mom going, Packer, Packer, Packer, Packer, Packer.
01:55:57
Speaker
ah So each will be your sister. I guess I take a bath with you and her, though.
01:56:07
Speaker
her byers I'm not taking a bath in the bird by myself. But anyway, I guess we ought to get out of here and go away from here. This place is kind of dry and nuts. All right. OK. So you guys head back towards them for a minute. You see Vanta is just kind of like still kind of in like a state of like Kind of just kind of taking it all in. She's looking around as the crowd is still looking. And as you guys kind of rejoin her on the stage when you make your way back on this motorcycle, like with just like twigs in your hair and like fucking like just like a couple of cuts and bruises from driving past branches and shit. And you have like little fin like kind of like in your lap as you pull up. um And do you rejoin them on stage?
01:56:55
Speaker
So all of you are on stage and Vanta kind of looks around and she says, well, that's the show, y'all. And then like the crowd just like fucking like goes nuts. So can all of you real quick roll performance one final time with as many Benjamins as you want to roll to get as high of a roll as you want. You wrote a crit fail, but that's
Escape to the Real World
01:57:16
Speaker
okay. You can keep rolling it. Keep rolling it, keep rolling it, keep everybody's roll in keep rolling Everybody's rolling. I got a lemon now.
01:57:25
Speaker
11, 13, Bella got, keep rolling, Bella, keep rolling. Everybody's happy. I just want to see how long it takes for you all to get a green number. Oh my God, not. every Everybody's just all shy on stage. Like, no, no, no clap for them, not for me. Don't look at me. I'm still doing stuff to my husband.
01:57:48
Speaker
um and so The crowd just erupts and just flowers rain down on top of all of you as people just chucking bouquets and loose flowers and and like coins onto the stage and just every dollar that they can is just raining down on top of you. The crowd is going nuts. um And then she says, all right, well, y'all, bake your way out in an orderly fashion. You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here. And then the crowd starts to like file away as you guys are all kind of hanging out um with your mom and bathy.
01:58:20
Speaker
and Ishii and Raby the Weird is there, and um Little Finn, who is still catatonic and incapacitated, and Teen Wren, and Punkenstein, and Bella. And after everybody leaves, and you also hear boof, boof, as Dutchess comes running, um and finally tracks you guys back down after you ran off. And so Dutchess joins you on the stage as well. And you see like Vanta's like super giddy to like meet your dog.
01:58:50
Speaker
and and like kind of kneels down and starts like giving her a little scritches. um And so this will be the epilogue, guys. like we're Instead of filming an extra one, we're just going to do it here. So Punkenstein is keen on setting off this bomb, and he's allowed for everybody to leave before he turns he he pretty much explains that anybody who's caught in his blast will be turned inside out before the portal opens. like And he describes it like a hole is going to open, and he's going to run through it.
01:59:16
Speaker
Um, so ah short is old man. Yeah. And so he like he so you guys all like need to leave or for those of you who are going to stay or to leave with him, like those are the ones that will stick with him that he can protect. So let's just kind of go around and describe like what you all think happens after this, like, you know, for those of you who leave and for those of you who stay. So, Ren, you said you're going to go with Pankenstein, right? And you have like Finn in your arms. Yeah. And like Pankenstein takes Finn and kind of straps her to to the back of his chair. There's like a little like a little compartment that she fits perfectly in. um And so like, do you say anything to cut her to maverick? Because you know, they're not coming with you. um You know, are you taking Duchess with you? Is maybe the weird going with you? Oh, yeah, they're all going with me. OK, so like,
02:00:14
Speaker
Duchess, Ravey the Weird, ah Bella, and Ren, you're all going with Punkenstein. Actually, you know, why don't we have Bella? Bella, do you have anything that you want to say either to Punkenstein or to Cutter and Maverick before you guys go, before you guys part ways pretty much forever? You won't see them ever again.
02:00:34
Speaker
Look, you two need to be on your best behavior while you're here, OK? No more starting trouble and killing you know strangers, dogs. I need you to get along with everybody. And also, make sure that little boy, that little brave, ah he you know watches his mouth because nobody needs that foul language coming out, all right? And you both better watch your mouth, too, OK? Because I'll make sure nothing happens to my baby, and I'm going to protect her, all right? Nothing's going to happen to her.
02:01:02
Speaker
We're going to be a family again, and that's what's important. I have my family back. That's great. That's just great. That's how Connor says that's great. Never do you respond to Bella at all. and i'm I'm sure Breifel become a great man. I'm like, I'll make sure of that. But I would have to have appreciated if you would have lied less to us.
02:01:30
Speaker
Well, look, I couldn't tell you the whole truth and you didn't even believe anybody when the whole truth came out. So I had to give you something in order to get you where you needed to be. All right. No ill intentions, but it is what it is. Let's just leave it at that. Yes. You ground up where you were supposed to. Um, so You guys, so you hear that from Bella and then Bella steps over near Punkenstein, who has like his hand, his trigger, his thumb is like convulsing, ready to press like a big old button like that. He has in his hands. Ren, what do you say to ah Cutter and Maverick before you leave? Bye, guys. She's waiting. Bye, Ren. We'll miss you.
02:02:22
Speaker
I'll miss you guys, too. I'm sad that you're not coming with me. ah Yeah. Kind of going to miss you guys, even though I really just have memories of you from the other Ren and stuff. But you know, it is what it is. i and You're not quite the same person as I first met you. but Probably
New Adventures and Conclusions
02:02:45
Speaker
not, no. No, but I still really miss having you around.
02:02:51
Speaker
ah yeah Hopefully you'll find a very interesting and fun life over there on the like real world. Yeah. Hopefully I'll see you again. Hopefully it'll end up in time jail or something like that.
02:03:09
Speaker
You hear like talking off in the background. How do you know about that? Who told you? Munchup talks in his weird reveries when he's looking at his chops painting.
02:03:20
Speaker
What a blabbery little bastard. I don't know what he means. I thought it was funny to say. ah You see, like, as he says, blabbery little bastard, you see like like Bella's like soap protocol kicks in. There's already like a bar of soap going towards its mouth it. He's like, oh, yes.
02:03:39
Speaker
So. so um Yeah. And you see like little Finn wakes up for a moment and shoves one in there. too Yeah. um That's a bad word. That's a bad word. Yeah. um So, Carter, do you say anything else to Dutchess, Ravi, Ryn and company before they before you guys leave? Because you have to get out of the blast zone before I pet the dog.
02:04:05
Speaker
I say, good luck. I hope but this doesn't end up badly. Hope this works out as he thinks it's going to. Hope you have a nice life on whatever other side of wherever you're going is. And yes, I guess good luck. You too. See, Kathy kind of gives you a little wave as well. and She says, thanks for helping take care of my bow here. Of course. um ah Maverick, do you have anything else you want to say to Ren and company before they leave?
02:04:33
Speaker
I just nod my head. Just nod your head. Sage nod. He's like falling asleep. Yeah. It looks like, it looks like he's nodding, but he's just, he's dozing off. All the stress is done. And you see, like, you see Martha kind of like gives him a little slap and she's like, wake up, come on. You have more endurance than that if you want to stay with me. Mama, come on. Um,
02:05:01
Speaker
And as I thought of this midway through everything going on, as I go to leave the stage, I walk towards my gun belt and I take a step right between the loop of the belt with my pistols on it. And I keep walking. I don't need those pistols anymore. Oh, dang. I still have my rifle, of course, just in case you know anything bad happens. But I'm not a gun man anymore. I'm going to be a farming man now. Love it.
02:05:23
Speaker
ah You walk off and you have, you have a bathy in your arm or like, or has like your arm arm ah hooked around yours as you walk off. And I go, Oh, I have my, my, hand in my, my, my, my arm around his mom too. But I'm like,
02:05:35
Speaker
Oh, Maverick, I got to make sure Beth gets down to steps. Okay. Why don't you help my mama down the stairs? Oh, I have a good idea. Do you mind if I help you, young lady? Oh, no, not at all. And she's like blushing huge. Beth, let's hurry down the stairs. I don't want to hear any of this though.
02:05:52
Speaker
utter's got dady Yeah. You know what, Maverick? Why don't we have you roll for survival to help his mom down the stairs? That's a four. That's a four. A successful help. She's clutching on to you tight and every so often kind of massaging your biceps as you help her down. It would have been so funny if there was a critical fail. Yeah. He's like, and then you have to have a duel with Cutter because you killed his mom. Yeah.
02:06:25
Speaker
So you guys head off. Beth, it was a goodbyes. ah Vanta calls in all the horses. Butternut is there. All of your horses show up um as you guys can mount. And she looks excellent. Huh? I said, oh, butternut. Excellent. and I was going to say, Matthew, you can write this one here. This is butternut, too. I had to write her after losing butternut. Oh, no, no, I don't want to write butternut, too. I want to ride with Cutter riding butternut.
02:06:54
Speaker
I want to cut a nut while writing butternut. I want to cut a nut. Don't look over here, man, but we're trying something new.
02:07:06
Speaker
All right, as you guys ride off away, Vanta just kind of you know has been silent for quite some time. and She looks back and much how Maverick did, she just gives ah a solemn nod um as her hair kind of starts to blow in the wind a little bit. And she rides off with you guys in silence um as you guys head away from the blast. And then Punky says to Bella and so to Duchess and Ravey the Weird.
02:07:35
Speaker
um And to Ren, he's like, all right, hold on to my chair. And I swear to God, if you let go and you get eviscerated and die, I'm not going to apologize when we get to the real world.
02:07:47
Speaker
Um, and then he smashes a button and then just as you guys are all holding on and like Duchess is kind of like, you know, being held on by one of you guys, like you just see for a second. You can see the air. You can see every particle that floats in the air. You can see everything. Just stop.
02:08:08
Speaker
And for a brief moment, you can see like a bright flash of light. And then you see this purple and blue and green swirling ah oval shaped a hole ripped into reality with like occasionally like kind of crackles of lightning kind of slashing through it, breaking through it. And you all die like terrible deaths where you just feel like your intestines are being pulled out of your guts over and over and over again.
02:08:36
Speaker
But then it rewinds and you're fine. And um then all of a sudden everything goes back to normal for a brief moment and you just see like the surrounding area looks like a fucking nuclear bomb hit it. Like it's just like ripped up from the ground. Everything is scorched. Nothing is left except for where you guys are standing. And he says, all right, let's go already.
02:08:59
Speaker
um And then he just like starts like zooming into the hole without another word. um Bella, do you follow behind? She's following behind closely. You follow behind closely? Dutchess runs in, boof, boof, boof. Ren, do you walk in? Oh, yeah. As you walk in, Ravi the weird is on atop your shoulder. And as you guys walk through, Ravi just turns around and he looks at the world behind him and goes,
02:09:30
Speaker
by um And then you guys you guys walk in and the portal shuts and then the rest of the bunches goes And it just like everything is turned inside out and just everything just looks scorched and wrecked as you guys step in um So now let's talk about what happens So let's go around for the final epilogue to say what your life looks like where you guys end up What you guys end up doing what your future looks like because I want to know what your endings look like so um Ryn, Bella, you guys can collaborate on this if you like. You guys step in through this portal and you head into a whole new world that you've never seen before that looks familiar but is also different. um It's more akin to the actual world in which we live. So, Ryn, what's Ryn's life look like as you step into this new place? Like, we can jump forward as much time as you like to where you think is the most interesting. um She ends up on the Churg and Meman.
02:10:28
Speaker
She heads up. She heads up. So end up with a churken meme.
02:10:40
Speaker
Did another one of your characters also a non-churken meme? I love the churken meme, man. They all end up there. oh No more stowaways. You're going right to the jibiscan border.
02:10:57
Speaker
Sasha keeps bringing friends home. So she ends up on the Chorgan Memen as they try to jettison her out and then eventually she talks her way in to be part of the crew. Then there's Sasha Rocket, the other Rocket, I think. Also, what was her name? Tabitha Rocket. And then Russian Monkey and Robot. The fuck is the only real world?
02:11:23
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, Torgen's just like, Torgen's just like one of these days. I swear to God, I'm just going to self-destruct. I'm just going to do it. um news Sasha, I swear to God, you keep bringing more friends home. It's going to be one of those days where I just blow all of you up. I'm just going to remember my guy's name. Baxter leans back in his chair. You have got no balls. You won't do it.
02:11:51
Speaker
and BX just sitting there and watching Perish Meckles. Just watching Perish Meckle on the Boob Tubes. So shove out, it ends up on the on the Forkers team. ah Bella, what is your life with Frankenstein look like and where do you guys end up?
02:12:09
Speaker
Um, you know, they're going to have their, you know, old like style mansion and it's going to be like very Adams family style, but with more robot and Android type bills and spooky shit. And then every once in a while, Bella is going to message Ren and be like, baby girl, it's time to come home. You know, your father was doing a very special dinner and you're supposed to be here. So I need you to get your butt down from Chorgen Memen.
02:12:35
Speaker
and get over here and get to dinner, okay? You can't miss this party, all right? You can bring all your friends, I don't care. Make sure that Baxter, though, he's not throwing any poop at anybody like the last time, because I did not appreciate having to get all that cleaned up, all right?
02:12:49
Speaker
You yeah that like inside shuriken meme and you hear like the voicemail system go off and then shuriken's like Oh, there you go. Time to go when he reaches little tentacles in and sucks you up and just his fucking football thrust tosses your ass best on ah one card everyone remembers What about the time I brought flowers? Don't talk about that one. And you see just like these meteors of these people from the ship, Tabitha Rocket, Sasha Rocket, Rand Baxter, and BX5. Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew. And you just hear, you heard Jorg and me was like, ah.
02:13:26
Speaker
I wouldn't mind getting on some of that villa, though.
02:13:31
Speaker
um You just gotta invite her up, Shorgan, okay? She'll stick their fingers her finger in your port anytime. Right in that socket. You hear, like, Punkenstein's like, oh, I like this idea. I like where this is going. um We can record it on the talking box. Yeah.
02:13:55
Speaker
All right. And then so as that's happening, we cut to what's happening with Maverick and Cutter and Bathy and Ishii. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Wait, where's where's um where's Ravi the weird at? ah Where's he hanging out? He's with me on the truck and me, man.
02:14:10
Speaker
Oh, he's also there. So, yeah, like you just hear like, hi. And he's like, I hate you. And he throws him to.
02:14:17
Speaker
and Baxter always plots killing him. He's like, there's only one talking animal on this ship, you son of a bitch. Yeah, every day he acts. He act he get he may gets a little closer to target practice. Accident. um So he checks. He checks it out. That's how like Baxter and Chorgen start to bond as they both hate Ravey. Yeah, it's more than you.
02:14:37
Speaker
Yeah. so um So we cut to Cutter and Maverick. Cutter, what is your life with Bathie and your mom and Maverick? like Where do you guys end up? Do you build that place up on lame.com? It's the end of Red Dead Redemption 2. We're going to build a little house together. We're going to name the house building song plays, and me and Maverick are sawing logs and nailing boards and clinking our coffee mugs together in the morning and flaking our beer bugs at the end of the day together and share our women. Yeah, it's men's stuff. Yeah, Sheriff Jeff comes by. ah Who else comes by? Bendy tries to come by. I'm like, ah All right, Bendy, I guess you're cool. Matthew likes Bendy. Matthew likes Bendy. And we we learned that Matthew's real name was Bethany.
02:15:30
Speaker
At some point. Bethany, that's nice. and And the only thing we shoot now is like if there's like a wolf or something at the farm. In skunks. In skunks, do you retire, Maverick? Are you retired from the life? I'll give it another try of retirement, yeah. You're giving another try of retirement. You're sitting on your little rocking chair. There's always big jokes around the ranch of maybe we were too hard on old sloth about having us all take a break. Remember how we stabbed them with a cross. And then sorry. And you're just sitting on your little rocking chair with ah with Martha. And ah do you guys do you guys ah say anything? Is there anything else that you would be doing during your little retirement um age before we move on? It's your final chance to tell us what your story is. How does it end?
02:16:22
Speaker
I do want to like help like Carter and like a bad fee of like the farm. Like help him with the farm work. Yeah, not full time, but I want to help them. Okay, not full time. He's like, I don't want to help. I want to be ranching all the time. I'm old enough to not work the entire day. Oh, yeah, you'll be you'll be servicing my mom too.
02:16:46
Speaker
Yeah. um So, and you the ghost of your wife gives you a big thumbs up. She's happy that you're here. I approve. I approve. Yeah. She's like, she's just happy that you're finally- You got it, you old dog. She's like, finally I can move on from this afterlife because you finally let me go.
02:17:02
Speaker
um OK, cool. So you guys have the retired life. You guys live on your little farm cutters or anything else that you think that you would be doing or that your life at Bathie would be like as the future moves forward for your life and do that. I think the last scene we see is um there's four chairs on the back porch looking over the pond. There's a little mound off to the side where all has been reburied.
02:17:24
Speaker
Um, I was going to have a little chat with mutton shop, but fuck him. Um, I mean, you could, we're all four sitting on the back porch, looking at the sunset over to the lake and everything's great.
02:17:36
Speaker
But then deep in the bowels of Puckenstein's manner, a dwarven cyborg wakes up and says, I am rim job. yeah And so that concludes um everything that happens in the Phoney Express up to this point. um So ah you know ordinarily, I would just end it there. But you know i think I just think you know I want to say thank you to everybody who listened to Phoney Express. There could be some spin-offs and other stuff down the way. You never know.
02:18:06
Speaker
But I just feel like you know sometimes you just got to know when that when to cut certain stories. And I feel like this was a really fun way to do it. um So thanks, everybody, for supporting Phony Express. It's been our most popular thing. People listen to you on a very regular basis. So we'll probably have more cowboy stuff because we know that's what you like.
02:18:22
Speaker
um but ah But yeah, thanks for listening. And and as a thank you, we're going to have everybody go around the room as their characters and say goodbye to you the way that they know how to. So Bella, how would Bella say bye to everybody?
02:18:38
Speaker
All right, now you you sit tight and you be good, okay? None of that foul language or I'm gonna have to put some bar of soap in your mouth, all right? You better behave and be on your best behavior, because I don't want to get no words about telling that you were saying naughty things and bad words. And so, you know, you better start acting right and and no guns, guns are bad, okay? And so you watch your mouth, no guns, especially not around children, all right? Kids don't need to be a part of any of that, okay? You know, you got to make sure kids are raised right and treat them all good.
02:19:07
Speaker
Yeah, you gotta listen to my mom because bad words are bad and guns do not belong with kids. It's not yours, Cass. That's very true. Don't listen to those two guns, they're pretty cool. Hey kids, cussing and shooting is cool. The dance combination to his gun save is 5, 15, 23. It's zero.
02:19:35
Speaker
Oh shit. Uh, does written say anything? Um, don't forget to a D O P E. Okay. What does, what does Maverick say?
02:19:51
Speaker
Always try to be a good lawful citizen, except if someone kidnaps your loved ones, then go on like full revenge mode and get those people back. back attorney camp And now I need to go back to my new wife. Bye. Oh, he got married. All right. finally, what does Qatar say?
02:20:16
Speaker
um I see on that there, Dusty Trail, partner. Hat tip. Hat tip. All right. And as this as the screen fades to black, for the final time, maybe we hear, as we see nothing, we just hear the sounds of machines whirring and and and like Perry Schmeckle videos playing in the background. And then we hear, all right, one more time for me. And then you hear, oh, Punky, I love that stash. Alright, now get it off the damn ship!
02:20:53
Speaker
Hey, I won't do that.
02:21:34
Speaker
but doest look good already