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A Glabrous Old Roach
17 Plays5 months ago
Do you tell your roomy if you've seen a roach (if they're deathly afraid?) What do you do if someone tells you you're hard to approach? How can you get more comfortable in social settings? WTF does "Glabrous" mean?
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Transcript
Podcast Introduction and Lighthearted Banter
00:00:00
Speaker
Right here is where you would do your part you would press the record button, right? It is recording as we speak Excellent. Look at that. All right. Hey, it's only mine Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Non-binary people of universes known and unknown. This is, that's our cue, or TOQ for short. We're particular cues, and we take them, and we turn them into like two-thirds of a triangle, and we go out to the Australian Savannah, and we just chuck that motherfucker out into the ether, and that shit comes back a nice, ripe-looking old eye with a little bit of dingo feathers on it. Why dingo feathers? Because a dingo ate an emu, and then I took his head off on the way back.
00:00:37
Speaker
Dingo for emu feathers and what that means if you never listened to show before as we take questions from the internet like places like reddit and Quora and we Answer them as if anybody gives a shit to hear our opinion um Having said that my name is Adam if I haven't already said as much and joining me as always as my good buddy Danny guarantee Danny guarantee, how are you my friend? Oh crikey That's the best you're going to get out of me in terms of a Australian
4th of July Reflections and Gas Pump Hacks
00:01:06
Speaker
accent. I can't do that one at all. You know, I'm doing pretty good. I can barely do it either. I'm doing good. Did you have a good 4th of July? I did absolutely nothing for the 4th of July. So it was neither good nor bad. It was just there. Amazing, amazing. We had some people over. It was a good time.
00:01:26
Speaker
Yeah, i wish I wish I lived closer because you guys have all that fun. And then I wish you were closer to when are you going to move like next door? Five and a half hour. When are you guys going to come out west? Move into at least a central P.A. where Will lives and then I can come see you guys out there. You guys would be near the Poconos. It's very pretty up there. Yeah, but I like I like where I live right now. I really like my area. You can pump your own gas in my state, though. I don't want to do that. It's weird. It's weird not to pump your own gas. I get to just sit there and just like relax for a bit. It's so odd. I don't have to sit there listening to ads on the gas pumps. I mean, some of them do have those. they've They're very alarming, the ones that do. But all right. Life pro tip, if you ever see one of those, even if it's not labeled, the second button down on the left is the mute button. Oh, for real? Yeah. What a fun.
00:02:23
Speaker
piece of information that I did not know. Maybe that's why I never hear it when I go. At least I'm pretty sure that's the one I heard was the mute button. But one of them mutes it.
Dealing with Cockroaches: A Humorous Guide
00:02:34
Speaker
Well, speaking of mutants, do you want to answer a question? wow Yeah. um All right. This one is posted by No Case 4093. This one I got a long time ago. I don't even remember. It says 16 hours ago, but that's not one I got it. Okay. Well, 16 hours is relatively long, depending on, you know. Yeah. I think it's like 16 hours times like 13 months is when I got this. This is one of the few remaining backlogs of questions that I have accumulated. This is like, I think this is the last three that I got from like a year ago. And now all the ones moving forward will be semi fresh, but boy, oh boy, is the last of it. So I'm just digging deep. I don't remember any of these questions. Um, so here we go. So.
00:03:21
Speaker
I don't know what CMV means. What does CMV mean? Is that you asking or is that the question? No, that's me asking. Oh, that's change my view. Oh, is that what that means? Yes. So convince me what I'm thinking is not true. Oh, well, all right. What's that mean again? Change my view. I was going to say convince my view. I was like, that doesn't make sense. Oh, that's close enough. If I kill a cockroach, I don't have to mention it to my roommate. Details below. My roommate and I keep a clean place, but we live in a large apartment building with not as clean neighbors. Sometimes cockroaches get into our unit.
00:04:04
Speaker
My roommate hates bugs. She freaks out if she sees one. She will spend $50 on a bug spray, bait traps, et cetera, without much hesitation. Spotting a cockroach makes her anxious and obsessive for hours. About once a month, I will see a bug in the unit and kill it. I don't tell her as i don't want her her as I don't want her reaction. But she's never explicitly said, if you see a cockroach, tell me so I don't. Am I wrong by keeping my mouth shut? What do you think? I mean, if you're positive that they're coming from the neighbors and not anything you have, I don't see a huge problem with it. I would, however, like, since you're seeing them constantly, I would get your apartment checked. Maybe say like, I just saw, you know, one or something to her. ah Don't tell her like, hey, I've been seeing these for months.
00:05:04
Speaker
Just be like, hey, I saw a cockroach. I think it came from the neighbors. Maybe we should get our apartment checked just to be sure. Because cockroaches are one of those things where when you see one, there's a lot more you don't see. And if they're all on the neighbor side, that sucks for them. And I'm sorry you have to deal with it. ah But the last thing you want is them like spreading and migrating into your apartment where you just don't see it. So that's yeah that's my two cents. I would definitely get checked. Yeah, I think like. You because I'm somebody who prefers to be honest, but like at the same time, like if you if you are protecting this person from having extreme anxiety and I know that is hard to come down from when they have it, it may be somewhat anxiety inducing, but a way that you could tell your roommate at least to keep an eye out for it is just like Danny said,
00:06:05
Speaker
Hey, you know what? I saw one of those little fuckers crawling in the in the hallway near the neighbor's door, keep an eye out in case they get in here. But then again, I know you said they'll go nuts with the bait traps and everything, but really, is that such a bad thing? Like, yeah if you know that might be coming, you know, like, okay, fine, let her put some bait traps out. That's what they're for. I'd rather her do that and then be able to sleep easier than have a panic attack when she sees one without a bait trap to help soothe her feelings, you know? um So, you know, something to keep in mind, I guess. um
00:06:39
Speaker
But, you know, i I just don't think that you need to go full on like. i To answer your question, just like you said, I don't think you necessarily have to say, oh, I killed a bug in the apartment, but maybe you could tweak it just a little bit and say, oh, I killed the bug out on the on the landing near the door. like That way you can say, hey, get ready, but without having her afraid of like, oh, hey, there's one here. And if you do get caught in a lie, just make sure you clean up real good wherever it was. That way you can say, hey, look, this is what happened. I disinfected everything. I scrubbed the fucking floor. like Whatever will help her feel like, okay, you you sanitized.
00:07:14
Speaker
where the little bastard was. Yeah. Regardless of whether you want to tell them or not, I think you should put up traps personally, especially where you're seeing them. Um, cause again, if you see one, there's more, I would get your apartment checked and I would put traps just to be safe. You don't want that infestation.
00:07:38
Speaker
Yeah. Take it from someone who's at bed bugs. It's not the same, but goddamn, you don't want
Health Risks and Pest Control Insights
00:07:42
Speaker
bugs. They suck. Yeah, uh, according to this random the article from terminix that I just loaded up, they say cockroaches are known to carry a variety of diseases, including salmonella, E. coli, and staphylococcus. Especially that one. I forget what that one is, but it's got a real nasty name. Um, They can also transmit these diseases through their feces, saliva, or contact with your skin. Cockroaches are most likely to spread disease when infesting food preparation areas in homes and restaurants. And I can give you one more tip that I learned from experience when I worked in a small inner city town um is
00:08:26
Speaker
that if you see a cockroach and it's really, really white, it's probably been there a long time because typically they lose color as they get older, which means it's been around for a while. So that's especially daunting. If you see one crawling out from your neighbor's house and it's like pale in color. that means it's been there for a long time and they haven't done anything about it. Oh, God, I think your neighbors need to like get checked. You need to. So honestly, you could report them, say, hey, look, this is like an infestation report the to the landlord, tall fucking terminus call like whatever government agency that might be funding that and say, hey, look, this fucking we have a fucking roach problem. They keep coming out from under their door. Well, actually, there's someone you can call in the sanitary department.
00:09:09
Speaker
When we lived in our old apartment, we had the same issue with, um, meat beetles. They're like these little beetles. Yeah. They're like these little brown and black beetles. And we captured one and looked it up on Google and they, I don't remember what the actual name for them is, but they like raw or undercooked meat ah or like just meat that's been left out. And we'd always find them like against coming from like this one wall in our apartment, nowhere near our kitchen. So like we know it wasn't us. It must have been the next door neighbors or something. And they were just coming in from there. ah But we never really did anything about it, because unlike cockroaches, there's no meat here. So like there's nothing for them to you know do their thing in right and make more. so Yeah. you know What's kind of annoying is
00:10:06
Speaker
like There are people who are. Like, I can count on one hand how many times I've seen a cockroach, which I guess is a good thing. It's never been where I lived, thankfully. um But like.
00:10:24
Speaker
People are people will live with a cockroach or a family of cockroaches and somehow be fine with it. yeah But. If they see a fucking spider, they want to burn the whole place down. And like, to me, that's so backwards because like, oh, weird. 90 percent of spiders don't give a fuck about you. They don't want to to be anywhere near you. And they're only going to only certain ones that don't even want to eat you live like in the far deserts of like Iraq and Afghanistan. um And trust me, if they want to eat you, they'll eat you and you won't even know you're being eaten. um But like. But they're huge, but most little spiders that we have around the states and everything are usually pretty harmless.
00:11:06
Speaker
And like, but people would just like go full on nuts and just lose sleep over it. But like people will live with cockroaches and mites and all this other stuff that are dangerous to you. And all these like, I just, I don't understand the psychology of that as like, we'll live in our own filth and let those filth bugs live with us. If there's a spider in the house, God forbid, you know, whether that, you know, would kill any the other bugs that are living with you. It's just so weird to me. I just don't
Spider Invasion Myths and Joro Spider Facts
00:11:34
Speaker
understand that. Did you hear about the ah the upcoming spider invasion that's supposed to hit in New Jersey? No. So apparently there's this invasive spider species that's starting to make its rounds in New Jersey.
00:11:51
Speaker
They're like these giant, was it purple spiders or something like that, that spin webs and then float on the air, like in the wind. Oh yeah. i've i've heard film that do that yeah Yeah. Well, they're supposed to start. infesting New Jersey. So. Oh, my God. That is might be moving to P.A. after all. That is so funny. Like imagine like so many people just drop everything. Like I imagine him being at an outside restaurant and then all of a sudden like three spiders land like on your table. just No, I don't want to imagine that. Look, I don't hate spiders. I if they are outside my house, like if I see a spider web, I leave it alone outside my house, eat the bugs, go for it.
00:12:34
Speaker
That doesn't mean I want them flying through the air at me. I think that's just fantastic. And then the the report also said that they're venomous, but they're harmless to humans. So I don't know which part to believe. Well, they can be venomous and harmless to humans. Those both those can both be true. Well, I think it like specifically said that the venom was harmful to people, but they're harmless. What are they called? They're called purple. Let's see. Invasive New Jersey spiders. Let's find out. Joro spiders are invasion. Joro spiders. Joro spiders. Oh yeah, that's them. Oh, they're not purple. They're black and yellow. Great. Type in Joro spider and find out more. Trico. Tric. Tric. Triconephilia clavata. Um, uh, so far, according to coil, there's no evidence of Joro spiders being dangerous to people or pets.
00:13:32
Speaker
while they are venomous to insects. OK, so their mandibles aren't strong enough to puncture human skin. So they're kind of like daddy long legs, just a million times creepier looking. I don't know if that's true about daddy long legs. I've never looked that up. I've heard that urban legend, but I don't know if that's true. I have no idea either, but I'm going to just assume it is. But ah but yeah, that's what I'm saying. like they can those Both of those things could be true. They could be venomous, but not harmful to people. um you know but Unless you eat one, I guess, if you eat a venomous creature, that's ah venom only usually can affect bugs because of how tiny their teeth are. If you eat a venom, which would make it point, is it poisonous for you to eat a venomous spider that can't bite you? No. That's what I want. You can't. No, it's not. You can drink venom.
00:14:23
Speaker
You can drink venom. Yes. What sets venom and poison apart is venom has to be in your bloodstream. Um, you can actually drink. Um, was it rattlesnake venom? And as long as you don't have an ulcer, you'll be fine because you can digest it and break it into its constituent parts that don't hurt you. There's a there's an energy drink idea right there. There's already an engine called venom, but we could just call it like the real stuff or we could call it like real venom, venom. earth Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, venom or the venomous drink or something. And like it's like in the tagline is are you brave enough to risk it? And then like you drink the energy drink and it's like, oh, hey, as long as you don't have any time time issues and you'll be fine. ah But it's just like, oh, but if you do today's the day you're going to find out
00:15:14
Speaker
You know, and so people are like having like a bunch of YouTube viral videos, you know, people eat tide pods and see. So people are like, oh, I'm going to drink venom, the actual venom. I would like to see if I lived through it next tick tock trend. Absolutely. ah Don't do that, by the way. No, absolutely not. No, don't go actually. Don't go. Don't do that. Y'all just trying to find a snake and milking it. You know, don't do that unless you know how to do that either. That's going to help make anti venom. But unless you're a professional, Don't, don't do that. But I still think it'd be funny. It's like, Oh, I heard on the front T O Q, you could drink snake venom. So today I'm going to make out with a snake. That one certainly got our name out there quickly. I'm going to milk it into my throat right now. Go ahead. Tex. See, I'm fine. Um, and so, yeah, anyway, you want to do another question?
Social Dynamics and Approaching People
00:16:10
Speaker
Sure.
00:16:12
Speaker
Um, I need to close this jar of spider thing. It's free. This one is kind of similar to a question we've answered before. Um, well, what was it? Then I'm going to give a similar answer. This one is from a Quora question. It is from half caxed. Don't know what any of those letters mean put together, but that's how it's pronounced. Um, and they say a girl I thought like me just told me while playing a question game in a group setting that I was the hardest to approach. What does she mean by that? I'm also a girl and that's, that's it. No context outside of that. So once, once again, a girl I thought disliked me just told me while playing a question game in a group setting that I was hardest to approach. What does she mean? Have you ever been told that you're hard to approach? No, no.
00:17:02
Speaker
Have you ever looked at somebody and thought, boy, that person's hard to approach? Yes. Yeah, a lot of times. What makes you feel that way? It could be a few things. um One of the most common that is not that person's fault would be RBF. you know If you just have resting bitch face, you just look angry when you're not actively smiling or something. Again, not your own fault. um But it has happened to me where I thought somebody was meaner on the outset. I judged a book by its cover. I know. um And most of the time it's not true. They're actually very nice people. um It could be that the other person is shy. um There's actually one person, one friend of ours, his wife,
00:17:56
Speaker
is extremely shy. And I guess it's kind of similar to this where I have had to check with my friend multiple times that she doesn't hate me because she acts like she doesn't like me. She avoids me. she you know If I talk to the group, she'll be the only one not to answer or anything. um And my friend says, no, she's honestly, she's really just shy. And at first, I didn't believe him. But then we all got together and had some drinks. And the drinking allowed her to loosen up a bit. And she was fine. you know Me and her had a great time. ah They played a game where they all took candid pictures of me without me noticing and sent them to each other. Thanks, guys, for that.
00:18:44
Speaker
um
00:18:47
Speaker
But then when she's you know later on, when we were all sober again and she was shy again, She acted like that again. So I would say she's hard to approach for me because she's so she's ship. She's so shy that it comes off as uncaring or almost disdain, but it's not. So I don't know if maybe she's just having a hard time approaching you. ah because there's no similar interests, or something about you just kind of keeps her at arm's reach. It could be resting bitch face, again, not your fault if it is. um So if you hear that from somebody that you're hard to approach, maybe you should just make the first move. If you want to be friends with them,
00:19:42
Speaker
You now know that they want to approach you, but they find you hard to approach. So you could take that jump. If you don't think they would be hard to approach, go to them and start a conversation. And once they get to know you and see that you're nice, things will get a lot easier for them. Yeah. Or, you know, ah stop wearing all of your Armor, you know your spiky bits. Don't wear your swords on your back. Don't like You know what I mean? Like don't piss a circle around you and light it on fire to ward off things Like that makes it hard for people to come to you because they're afraid of getting burnt poked Scratched maybe like some sort of bruise if they bump into you because of what you know you're wearing so really like I
00:20:29
Speaker
Maybe tuck your tail into your pants if you're some sort of dragon person because maybe they're afraid they're going to get hit. Like if you get happy, you'll wag it and hit somebody if you're a dog creature. I don't know who you are. Right. I can only assume what you look like and what could be off putting to people. It could be that every time you laugh, you spit fire at the teacher, you know, and everybody goes, whoa, what the fuck? And you don't notice it because it's just part of your every day, you know? So like be mindful of the different habits that you have because while they may seem
Internet Trends and Social Skills Advice
00:21:02
Speaker
innocuous and, and, you know, harmless, what really is happening is you're probably sending countless students to the, to the, to the medical facility every day. And you just don't realize that, you know? So.
00:21:15
Speaker
You know, oh, humans are like ogres, which are like onions, which have layers, you know, so you just have to think about your own layers. It could also be that one time you just walked up to somebody and just deck them in the face. I could see that being pretty off putting. Yeah. Like, or if you're the Hawk to a girl, it might, people might be like, Oh, she's too famous now to talk to because like she's going to think that I want that Hawk Tua when I talk to her. Somebody brought that up the other day. What is that? What is Hawk Tua? It's annoying is what it is. What else is new?
00:21:50
Speaker
It's just a stupid. it and Everybody gave me a look like I'm an idiot for not knowing. No one's good no one's going to talk about it in a couple of weeks, but it was just like some random, you know, those interviews that everybody does. But it's hard to believe what's fake and what's real anymore. Like what is it staged and what is genuine? But some guy asked like this country girl at like a concert, what's the freakiest thing? I can't remember exactly how he said it. Like, what's the freakiest s thing that you would do to a guy or something? And she says you have to give it the old hawk to and spit on that thing. And um like it just blew up all over the Internet. And then eventually she. ah She just got interviewed recently because there was a lot of already the Internet was speculating. Oh, she's the daughter of a of a pastor and he hates what's going on. or Oh, she's a school teacher. She might lose her job. And she's like 21 years old. Like, you know, like just the Internet already has come up with like so many theories about who she is. And they're speaking as if it's true because misinformation travels that way.
00:22:48
Speaker
That is basically the next cash me outside. How about that? Essentially, honest to goodness. Yeah, that's what it was. There's been auto tune remixes and all this other stuff. And like, you know, and then I saw a part of the interview where they're like, oh, we heard that like your dad was like a priest. And she was like, man, my dad's the farthest thing from a priest. it's Like, where'd you guys get that information from? um Well, I made it up. Yeah, she's just like a some country girl. She showed up wearing like those kind of country shorty, those cut off jean shorts and like a cowboy hat. and I was like, oh, OK. You know, but that was it. She was just like high on just like saying something funny. And that's what she said. And I like now huck to us, like the latest Internet stupid thing that everybody's going to be talking about for a little while and then they'll move on. You can't I can't anymore. That's all it is.
00:23:36
Speaker
Yeah, I only reason I found out about it really was because my roommate, when I said the same thing to him, I was like, he goes, he kept saying it and I was like, why do you keep saying that to me? He's like, and he just sent me like 18 reels that were like remixed of her. And I was like, what the fuck is this? Um, you know, but like, but that's the internet for you, man. That's the other net. There's a sentence. Yeah. Um, do you mind if I backtrack real quick on a subject we talked about earlier before we move on to the word of the day? As long as it's not, uh, go host spiders or whatever, they it is related, but it's not about this. It's not about the spider, those spiders in particular, but I had like a ah weird. I had a weird thought on the way home the other day about like what superpower I would want.
00:24:22
Speaker
like but I kept thinking about instead of being like all these utilitarian ones I was like what would I be what would I do if I if I can only pick a power that was supposed to like strike fear in people or like that was meant to win like this is the one that wins like I'm like I would go up against somebody who could spit fucking fire out of their mouth And I would just make every bug that like, I would want control over all bugs, insects, and arachnids. Cause then like that person trying to spit a fire at me and I would have like one spider crawl out of the dirt and go up his leg and he would lose his fucking shit. Like, and then I'd just walk up and stab him in the face while he's freaking out, you know, or just have it be a venomous spider and do the work for me. And then like I had a thought about like the.
00:25:04
Speaker
Like I was watching some something on Instagram and then there was like some cut out of like. Some page from the ah an Avengers comic book where Cap was like leading a charge at the White House and somebody was like, oh, Cap's anti-American. He goes far from it. We just want to get the guy that's inside of there because he doesn't belong there. And it was like, you know, cause that's what cap really was, was like, he wasn't like, I'm just going to tow the line of whatever America says. He's like, I want to do what's best for the United States. Usually it's punching Nazis. And now it's stopping like dictators from like taking power in ah in my country. And so like, he was like, we're not, I'm not here to take over America. I'm just here to get that guy out of the white house. And like.
00:25:45
Speaker
somebody and then like there was like a bunch of security and all these other like security things and I was like what if I just sent like a bunch of bugs one day to just like rain on top of like like I planted like a bunch of spider eggs right outside the White House right just think not not for President Biden in particular but let's just say the evil orange guy gets in there somehow Right. And I don't want to pass upon your government. Right. And then like just a whole entire White House is just littered with spiders and roaches and just every bug I could possibly get in there. That security is probably not going to think two shits about it first. They're looking for people, not for bugs. You know what? Being raised in the Catholic school, I hear all the time about how God made it rain frogs. Mm hmm. If God really wanted to get things done, spiders. Right. If he made it rain spiders going to do.
00:26:36
Speaker
Come on people. If if he made it rain spiders, everybody would just run and jump off the edge of the of this probably flat earth. I mean, I'm convinced he did kind of like make it rain all these terrible, awful things and then just pushed it all into Australia. And that's why just everything there wants to eat you.
Australia's Wildlife and Quirky History
00:26:57
Speaker
Well, yeah, they just kind of like the earth kind of tilts that way a little bit and something just kind of fell in that direction. Yeah. You know, it's kind of like that was the bottom of the barrel. That was like the last of the life. He's like, oh, God, all we got is like the really bad stuff. um Just right. Right in there. Yeah. It's like how the tub knows to put the water down the drain. Like, how does it know that? You know, like Australia is kind of like the drain. There you go, Australia. Enjoy that. You know, wasn't Australia colonized by like
00:27:26
Speaker
I think it was originally a prison state, like a prison country where like England took bad people. Yeah. Isn't that where they just sent prisoners? And like, we're going to send you about 2000 miles away from us so we don't have to fucking deal with you anymore. God, dude. And then they're like, hey, you know what? We're going to make this a country and a continent. And they're like, what the fuck ever, guy? Just go ahead. Yeah, we're going to throw things on the bar bet. See, that's the best you're going to get. Yeah. And then they're like, you know, we're going to we're going to have a great emu war. Um, which is a fascinating read. If you ever want to, the older I get, and the more I look back in history, the more I realized that like the history classes I had in school were just stupid, a bad and very there's so much interesting history in the world. And we touched on none of it. Yeah. Like you want people interested in history. Look up how, you know, Australia is made out of
00:28:19
Speaker
basically prison inmates that just all got moved to an island or yeah, the great emu wars, which was a real thing. It really was insanity. Yeah, like they were like the enemies were learning how to move in like packs and like coordinated movements to overwhelm the guys who were trying to shoot and kill them. It was crazy. um Fascinating stuff. Not unlike the whole killer whale thing going on right now. Right. The whales that are growing human feet and walking on land. That's the one. That's the one. Yeah. That's definitely what I'm talking about. Yeah. Yep. You got a word of the day for us, by the way? Of course I do. I have a word of the day. I wasn't sure since we kind of did this almost impromptu, like if you had one ready. I mean, it's brought to you by dictionary dot com. Thank you, dictionary dot com. Thank you, dictionary dot com. Today's is Glabrous.
00:29:19
Speaker
Glabrous. GLA, B-R-O-U-S.
Personal Grooming Stories and Humor
00:29:26
Speaker
Glabrous. What does glabrous mean? It is an adjective. Having a surface devoid of hair. Smooth. Having a surface devoid of hair. Smooth. So like, you know. Interesting. ah because She came out of the bath with you know beautiful glabrous skin on her legs right after shaving or something.
00:29:57
Speaker
Your legs are so glabrous today. your Your legs are so glabrous. That sounds so bad. Please do a video. You're looking these awfully glabrous today. Please do a video of like like maybe touching bells like the back of her neck or like maybe just like her forearm. Like, wow, honey, your arm is so glabrous. I'll do you one better. I'll touch your dad's head. He's bald. You'll touch your dad's head like, oh, your head is so glabrous. Your head is so glabrous today. Well, no, it's can I share with you something semi personal in that regard? ah As long as you don't mind everybody else hearing it. Oh, I don't mind at all. Terry, cover your ears. um ah So I went to Best Buy with Justin today because we've been trying to troubleshoot like all these Internet drops he's been having. And I floated like, oh, hey, if you want to get me something for my birthday in a few weeks, I'd really like a a um an external
00:30:52
Speaker
to hard drive like a terabyte hard drive to plug in because like I'm always uninstalling games so I can like keep desktop, you know, and I found that like so many solid state external drives are like just as good that like as long as you don't mind sacrificing USB port, it's worth it to not have to like try to fit another hard drive and reformat it in your computer. And so I kind of want to get one. And ah but like the cheapest one I found for like two terabytes is like 130 bucks. I was like, I ain't that bad. And I just bought him a brand new modem to try to fix his internet issues. And so we were there looking for another router to replace the shitty ones that his internet company gave. And he says, well, hey, while we're here, if you want to get something that's like 80 bucks or under, I'll just get your birthday present for you now because I'm not going to remember to get you anything in a couple of weeks. And so I was like, ah, well, that's not really, I can't get my terabyte hard drive because like, that's kind of out of budget. So I was looking around, I was like, oh, I got an idea.
00:31:44
Speaker
And I remember that I was thinking about getting like a new razor or like a new nose trimmer or something just because I liked these, like the groom. And like, I should say I like to stay groomed myself. because I guess that word has a different meaning now. Um, but like, I like to stay well groomed the best I can. I'm very aware of what my parents looks like best because I work with a lot of people and kids and everything. And, um, so I like to make sure I look my best when I show up to set a good example. Right. And so like, um, I was like, Oh, you know, a good nose trimmer would be good or something. But then we went over to the trimmer section and we saw like they just got this brand new like manscape gear there. Like, and I was like, Oh damn. And so that was one that was 80 bucks. Exactly. That was like, like but called like the lawnmower or something. That's not for your nose, is it? One of, they have one for your nose. It's called the weed wacker apparently, which I almost bought the wrong thing. That's for your, the weed wacker is for your nose. There is one for your face. I forget what that one's called.
00:32:43
Speaker
But then there's one that's for the lower region and it's called the lawnmower. And I got that as a birthday present from Justin today. um And I used it and it's everything is close to Glabrous. I'll tell you that. That's fine. I'm glad you have Glabrous balls, my friends. So. ah But ah but it was funny because like we were doing like an exchange because apparently we got the wrong model number for like a compatible modem for his Internet. So he had to go back and exchange it. And so after he had said that and he was going to get it for me while I was exchanging the modems, he started to become a bit self-conscious and he goes, do you want to just buy yours and then, you know, I'll just do mine. I was like, why are you like it? Because he looked up and it was a really cute girl behind the counter and he was like, nervous to talk to but he ended up getting to go to like someone else who like, you know, was like more of a motherly looking person than like someone who he could have in his mind had the potential to embarrass himself in front of.
00:33:41
Speaker
So then he took it, but then he took it when the line opened up that didn't have the girl he thought was cute in it. And then he goes, well, you know what? We just need to honor the tradition. Now, this is my present. I'll buy it. And I was like, so I was so close just for like running over there instead to block him. So he had to go to where the girl he thought was oh you absolutely should have you. I was gonna. But I was already kind of in line. I mean, because I went first. But I should have made him go first. Oh, my God. It was so funny because like he was feeling so cocky about it. Real funny. But in the moment we get up there goes, do you want to switch or? you know As you were walking by the cute girl one, you should have just been like loud enough for everybody to hear like, are you OK after buying that that pube trimmer? You're right. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, like.
00:34:28
Speaker
You know, yeah, just yelling out something just like, are you going to manscape justice? My friend's going to help me learn how to manscape properly. So he got my birthday, you know, cause he's a good friend. I'm a good wing man. He's the best kind of friend. He helps me learn to manscape. So anyway, manscape doesn't sponsor us, but if, if you think they should reach out to them listeners and say, Hey, Adam just shared a story about how he bought one of your products and he's very glabrous and use that word. Yeah. g L A B R. O. U. S. Right. GLA B. R. O. U. S. Yes. Glad. Rouse. um So, yeah, there we go. Glabrous. Bro us. Cockroaches are technically glabrous, I think. I guess that's gross. Thank you. What if I called this episode a glabrous Jura spider?
00:35:25
Speaker
Uh, well, you go ahead. I'm not going to look at it. It's just, just seeing the word upset you. No, it's just thinking of those spiders does again. I don't even hate spiders. I'm fine with spiders. Those things are big. They're black and yellow. They look creepy and they ride on the wind. I don't like it when they leave the ground and stay in the air. I know one of them is going to fly in my face at some point.
00:35:57
Speaker
What about a Glabrous old Roach? Does that sound better? That sounds like something we're trying to bring to the end of a party titles. So future. ed It does kind of sound like something like that. I'd like to say, come in. Oh, man. Come try to play with this Glabrous Roach. I think a good name for like this sounds like something that like a pirate would insult. So I'm like, I get over here. Yeah, I can labor as a land lover. The glab results, Roach. You smelly whale farts. Get over here. You
Nostalgia for Kingdom Hearts and Video Game Mechanics
00:36:29
Speaker
know, it's funny, like right before we started recording, I was playing Kingdom Hearts 2 and we're doing the Pirates of the Caribbean world. Yeah. Yeah, best start believing in ghost stories, Miss Tanner. You're a nun. Good times. So good. When I first played that game, I thought graphics will never get better than this. It was pretty good. It was pretty good. They got better.
00:36:53
Speaker
Yeah, they sure did. And more confusing and more story. I mean, I saw that there's like the whole collection on Steam right now. And I'm like, I'm just I know me. I'm not going to play through it all. I'm not going to do it oh know anything. we Well, we have the collection. I'm taking Mel through it. We played the first my sleep and we started to like in between the one point five game. And then I said, screw this. I hate this game. Here's what happens. Now let's get into two because that's the good one. And I think most of the rest are just movies at this point. So one and two are very good. Uh, three had great gameplay, but I never finished it. I didn't really care to something about it. Didn't keep me the way that the original ones, three was, uh, I did beat three and it was good. I think the Disney ride stuff was shoehorned in terribly.
00:37:47
Speaker
And the game was very easy. It was very much turn your brain off and just mash attack until you win. Yeah, I couldn't care about it. I played a little bit of it so I could hang out with Elsa for a little while and Rapunzel because they're my favorites. Um, but yeah, I just didn't care enough to continue playing through it. I think it was just because like it came too late. Like I'm just like, I've, it's like been 15 years since like all the other ones came out that I didn't play in the original series one and two. I'm just like, I just don't, I don't have that same excitement anymore because it's been so long and I don't remember anything that you're talking about and any characters you introduced that you assume I'm going to know if it ain't Donald or goofy, I probably don't fucking know who they are. Yeah. Well.
00:38:34
Speaker
One thing I was just thinking about today, playing 2 again, um they kind of anti-streamlined it. like In 2, you have your face buttons that do stuff, and triangle is context sensitive, right? So it does right something depending on the situation, all kinds of different things. ah So anytime you see that button light up, you're like, oh, something cool is about to happen in the fight. Most of the things Triangle could do in that in two, they made into a move in three that you could do at any time, which sounds good. But there's a bunch of them. So it's like, oh, yeah, you could attack things. You could jump. You can glide. You can like aim at this thing over here. You can swing off this thing over here. And they're all different button inputs. And I'm like, this is just a lot. I'm just going to press the attack button. Yep.
00:39:24
Speaker
Sorry to the listeners who don't know what Kingdom Hearts is. Sorry. and Ramble about video games a lot. ah yeah Anyway, you know it's just a game about a kid that gets a blade that looks like a key. It's not really a blade. It's more like just a big blunt object. It's a big key. I wouldn't want it. And he hangs out with Donald and Goofy and travels to Disney places and some Square Enix places for fun. If you like Disney and you like Final Fantasy and you want to see them mixed, there you go. ah Don't get too invested in the story, though. it is The most complicated thing. Yep. It's batshit
Improving Communication and Social Interactions
00:39:57
Speaker
crazy. It is just insane. Yup. Anyway, you want one more question before we wrap this thing up? Let's do one more question. All right. This one is from user Sam, Sam 9, 8, 7, they say, I want to learn how to speak more comfortably in group settings. And they go on to say, for some reason I can communicate pretty well one-on-one or in a small group or two other people.
00:40:22
Speaker
This is for both work setting and as well as casual chatting. However, when I'm in a larger group with like five people, I shut down a lot more and I'm less sure of myself. I don't feel like myself at all and I feel like my friends don't truly know me. How do I become less stiff and more comfortable in group settings? Wow, that's a good one. Yeah. I guess, honestly, the only real thing you can do is just force yourself to do it. And it gets easier as you go. I used to be awful at talking to groups. And even if it was only like three or four people, it would be a problem for me because I didn't want to embarrass myself. But I eventually just started forcing myself to speak my mind. I was like, even if it's a dumb thought,
00:41:13
Speaker
It's funny. You know, I can make people laugh with it if I'm wrong and they correct me. It is what it is. Um, and it does, it gets easier as you do it. You realize that, you know, that thought you thought was dumb that you don't want to say, isn't, you know, maybe somebody else is like, Oh yeah, I didn't think of that. Like, you know, or you're right. Like, what is this? You know, somebody agrees with you. Um, Yeah, that that's my advice. You just got to kind of get over the hump and and force yourself to do it until you get used to it. I mean, practice practice does definitely help or picture them all in their underwear. ah Yeah, I mean, but that just depends on if you know how you react to seeing people in their underwear, because if
00:42:01
Speaker
you aren't used to that. Because remember, everyone's going to be in their underwear. not just You can't just manifest it in one person. Everyone is going to be in their undies. And then you have to think like, boy, am I questioning my sexuality if I think certain people, you know, I want to see in their underwear more. And then if you're a thinker like me, sometimes you'll say words that you're thinking out loud when they're meant to stay inside. And then you'll say like, hey, when do I get to see you in your underwear again? And they're like, what the fuck are you talking about? you know We weren't talking about any of those things. And then either you become really popular because everybody remember that one funny, silly thing that you said or nobody wants to hang out with you because they think you're a creep. So, you know, there's always that. So just be careful if you do. um But. As the resident extrovert, I can tell you that. It is a skill like for me, the only thing about being an extrovert is that it empowers me to have those interactions.
00:42:57
Speaker
However, so i I'm a little bit more motivated to do it because you know it makes everybody feel good, not just them, but makes me feel good too. um However, I will say that it is still a practice for me because there are tons of people that I interact with on a regular basis. I should i should say, not the same people all the time, but like I interact with a lot of different people all the time because of the nature of my work and personality, where just recently one of the students I work with, Found out she's very, you know, like very far on the autism spectrum, but like. Only certain parts of how she thinks is, which is something I never learned before. And no that was a thing. Yeah. Like there's only certain processes that she follows that really highlights that she has autism, but otherwise you would never know. That's crazy. And so like, but then I had a stumble for the first time in a long time, just doing something
00:43:55
Speaker
Cause she's usually very witty. She's very funny. She likes the silly stuff that I say. I think she's like 16, 17. So she's like, she's going to graduate soon. And like, she's like trying to find herself and and all these things. And then she'll go from just like, Oh, I'm having a really witty conversation with my supervisor to just complete shutdown out of nowhere. Like sometimes there'll be something she thought about that just ruined her day. Could be something she overheard in in another conversation that had nothing to do with her. that would just ruin her day it could be how i said something the other day i was in like a funny voice issues doing something really funny with the weed wacker i was like oh yeah here comes maggie doing the whatever and all of a sudden she just turned to a frown i was being silly like i always was and then she goes i don't like that. And then just like she was just sad she didn't she didn't tell me why i didn't ask why.
00:44:43
Speaker
She said, I didn't like that for a moment. I didn't know what to say. because I was like, Oh, we were having a really good time and then wow shifted your mood. And I don't know if it has something to do with her being autistic or just like a different type of sensitivity that she has. But in that moment, I was like, Oh, this is a good practice for me because I haven't really had to practice that much in a little while. So I had to just kind of find a way to get back to like taking us as almost like going to a checkpoint, like when you die in a video game and you get to go back to like a checkpoint. So like, I was like, all right, where were we before this happened? And so I just went back to like the funny thing she's doing.
00:45:19
Speaker
with the weed whacker where she was trying to like twist the one nozzle to get this thing to go through. And I was i was just like i was like, so you got to buff up your hands or what so you could twist that stupid thing. And before I knew it, she's back at it. She's like, oh yeah, I'm going to be able to get it. It's going to be easy. I don't need your help. And then we were back at it, and it was fine. But I had to train myself. I had to think like, oh, OK, this is a learning moment for me. like I haven't had this in a little while where somebody was just like, stop this thing that ordinarily I think is funny. My brain hates it now. you know like I was not used to that. Yeah, that's um that's interesting. Yeah. And so like instead of feeling defeated and just sitting there in silence, I did sit there for a few moments just like, OK, Adam, think about what you're going to do here. And then then we did and everything was fine. um You know, ah but anyway, my point is, is that like it is a practice, even if you're the life of the party, like people will notice if you're only talking about yourself,
00:46:14
Speaker
And that's the thing too, is people think like, oh, I'm good in a social setting because I can talk about myself the whole time, which only makes you either look like a douche or just makes people think like, oh my God, I can't wait for him to stop talking so I can walk away. Um, so the best advice that I can give you all of that, ah and I recognize I've been talking for a minute 30 is to say it's going to take practice. But the best thing that I would say to do if you want to learn how to talk better in groups is to be inquisitive, the genuinely inquisitive.
00:46:46
Speaker
Look at your friends or acquaintances that are with you. If you haven't seen them in a while, ask them questions. So what have you been up to the past couple of weeks? I haven't seen you or hey, where did you get those shoes? Cosmetic stuff. so Things are always the easiest things to go with, you know, if you actually like it or hell, even if you don't like you can still be genuinely curious and you just want to get a conversation piece started. Notice how people dress if they have interesting earrings in or if they have a fun design on their shirt or if their hair is put up a certain way. People want that to be noticed, whether they they admit it or not. Yeah. just Maybe they're looking like especially glamorous today. Yeah. i but Like, hey, you know what? I can't help but notice you're wearing these cute little shorts, Dave, and that your your legs are especially glabrous, Dave. va is today Dave has glabrous legs, everyone. And they'll come all day. Oh, oh, glabrous, Dave or David's slave, you know, something like that.
00:47:40
Speaker
Um, so, you know, so you thought I was going to say it was a lady with smooth legs, didn't you? I'm not surprised it turned into a dude. No, it's a dude named Dave who likes to keep his legs shaved because maybe he likes sports or maybe he hates being hot in the summer. I knew a guy that shaved his legs because he wore silk pants and he thought it felt better that way. There you gonna go. Every to each their own. I am going to manscape my legs when I'm done with this recording just to see what it'll feel like. Oh, actually speaking of. I promise it's not that bad. When you say that um this girl was using the hedge trimmer, are we talking the nose hair? No, no, unfortunately. Like an actual hedge trimmer. No, we're talking about like ah like a weed whacker. I'm sorry, weed whacker, not hedge trimmer. Yeah.
00:48:30
Speaker
Not the nose hair thing. And I know it was just usually the kids aren't allowed to change the string, but like I'll put the string in and then just kind of like let them twist it sometimes just to kind of feel included in it because like they want to learn. So like so like sometimes like, all right, Maggie, go, go, go. And like some of them are like the work. Are you doing landscaping? I work with kids between like 16 and 21 that are like either on the spectrum or have some sort of learning disability. Yeah. But I mean, are you like making them do landscaping? What are you guys doing making them do landscaping? Their job is to landscape. My job is to supervise to make sure they stay on task or to show them how to do something if they don't know how to do it. Oh, so they're actually working. It's not just like. Yeah, they're literally like working outside like they're they're beautifying a cemetery. I did not know that.
00:49:15
Speaker
Yeah, so like that's like my my placeholder job. I thought you were just like a caretaker. I see. No. So yeah. So like it it's my job to be like, OK, hey, get to you know, you got to get back to work or take a break like you're sweating too much or like, you know, or make sure you get in the shade or if you can't start your lawnmower or show you how to do it or how to get it going. Stuff like that. Or to make sure that because also a lot of them are like late teens. And like, they just like to be lazy. they They want to show up and get a paycheck. So I have to make sure they work too. So like, if I notice somebody's like hiding behind a tree, sitting there for 20 minutes, I have to go like, essentially like karate kick them to get them to fuck up. and like an i roy me I'm 34 and I still do that.
00:49:55
Speaker
but I threaten them. I'll go, I'm going to kick you in the head if you didn't stand up kid. And they go, Oh, Adam, you're, and I go, Oh, Adam, you're crazy. And then they'll get up and go back to work because I'm kind of the funny one. I'm like, listen, if you don't get out and get to work, I'm legally supposed to kick you in the head. Is that what you want? No, get back to work. Um, you know, but anyway, that's what I, that's what I'm doing right now is like a placeholder position. But anyway, like, but I'm learning that they all have, different ways that they understand things. And that's always been the fun part for me as a teacher and an educator is like, how can I help a person understand something in a way that other people
00:50:30
Speaker
might already get it. you know And each student also doesn't recognize that about everyone else. They assume like, oh, just because I got it, that person should get it. um And so they also have to learn like, hey, they don't think the way you think. They don't learn the way you learn. And I've also been educating all of the other supervisors because a lot of them don't know that either. So I'm just like, hey, just because you said it this way doesn't mean they understood it that way. you know right um So it's kind of fun. But anyway, like that kind of brings me back to the point of just like, If you want to learn how to communicate more comfortably in group settings, a good way is not so much to learn that you need to talk about yourself or about anything in particular, is to ask questions to understand how people communicate what they like.
00:51:16
Speaker
what they respond to when you do ask them because then you were learning about how to talk to them. Like, if you ask Janet over there, Janet, where'd you get their earrings? And she goes target and then turns away from you and goes back to whatever she was doing. Maybe she's not a very social person like you, then you know, okay, maybe Janet also doesn't like to talk that much. But then you say, oh, hey, Tyler, you know, I overheard you saying that you were playing the Elden Ring DLC earlier. Like, how's that going? And then if he just starts going off on a fucking tangent, you're like, OK, that dude really likes talking about himself. But also now you know he's really, really into this subject. And this doesn't take much to pull that string to get this person to talk, you know.
00:51:55
Speaker
um So ask questions and like take notes, like mental notes of like, okay, how do different people respond to different stimuli? Cause that's how you dominate conversations. You get better at it by asking questions. And then eventually you have all the secret information. You have all the codes right there. You can plug that shit in and manipulate everybody in that fucking door. No, stop there. No, no, I'm not doing that part. No. Now, I say manipulate, not like ah to kill them or to hurt them or to take from them. No, we're going to stop it there. But you can control the conversation. You can control the conversation by being educated on who. OK, that's better. That's good.
00:52:37
Speaker
Do you not understand? Do you get what I'm saying though? I do. Yes. You can, you can like, um, lead the conversation a little bit. You can lead the conversation without being the center of the conversation. Yeah. You know, just the way you, you said like, and then you have all the dirt, you have all the stuff and then you could manipulate and I'm like, nope, nope. But you, you essentially, you essentially, um, You are like a Ninja interviewer. Like you are asking questions to understand and people will remember that you asked them and then follow it up and talked about it. So like, that's how you get in as people notice you're asking questions. So, or if it's a person who actually has manners like me and Danny.
00:53:25
Speaker
Like, you know, if I say in the very beginning of the episode, ah Danny, how are you? And then usually he'll give a response. And then after a moment, he'll say, how about you? No, I don't think he asked me this time. So I was a little hurt. But um ordinarily, once you ask someone a question, they'll ask you like, oh, have you played it? Oh, did you do you wear earrings? Do you like earrings? Do you like this, whatever? Like, and if they respond back, that's how you get your shot to talk. I was too busy trying to work on my Australian. That's okay. I'm not upset. How are you, Adam? How are you doing? You know what? I am so frustrated that I don't have the power to control bugs and arachnids. I understand. Your voice is awfully glamorous today. Good. You know, I have been working on it. There's no hair in your voice today.
00:54:19
Speaker
No, no, no, I stopped looking at the cats recently, so that really helped. sometimes you don't do it nice Yeah, I mean, it does because I want to help them stop licking themselves so they wouldn't get hairballs. I said, I'll do it, you know, but then you get the airballs. Yeah, but, you know, I'm bigger, so I think I can process them better um where they're just little little people, little kitty. So, you know, that's fair. Just be careful. You don't want a blockage. oh No, no, I I'm not worried about that. I have manscape. I'll just shake it all out. Yeah, do that. Yeah. I shave. the I shave the inside of my throat like every week. Good. Keep it nice and glabrous to keep it glabrous. Yeah. um Never mind. But yeah, do you have anything else you want to add to the speaking comfortably in group settings as an introverted quiet man who now is like so social and popular?
00:55:10
Speaker
No, I think honestly what you said really hit the nail on the head. Uh, the biggest thing is just like really listen to the conversation, listen to what people are talking about. And if you have something to add, don't be afraid to, you know, don't, don't get stuck in that, that pattern of like, is this worth adding? Is this not worth adding? Oh crap. I thought about it too long and we've moved on. Now I'm definitely not going to add it. Just add it. There are times where I'm in a group setting and I will just say, like if somebody says something and it's not explained like a fifth grader, even if I know everybody's figured it out, I will just repeat it in the fifth grade language. um Just to make sure that I have it at that basic understanding that it's right. And half the time I've had people be like, thank you. like you know There was one part I didn't get, but like the way you put it was much easier.
00:56:06
Speaker
It's like raising your hand in class and then nobody else is raising your hand. But then the moment you ask a question, more hands pop up because you're like, oh, I thought I understood it or I was too afraid to ask. Yeah. You know, so it really does. It really does make a difference. So, yeah, that is called, by the way, Danny, that is called reflective listening describing where you take details that you've heard and you talk it back to the person or the group that has said it to make sure that you understand it properly. So it's like yeah listening. Yeah, it's like active listening to another level. Active listening is confirming that you are indeed listening and maybe like throwing in a detail like, right, like the the car or oh yeah, Elden Ring, right. And then like reflective listening of like so you're saying that the reason that you played this is because blah, and then you reflect back to them what they said. um Yeah, or I'll do like a
00:57:01
Speaker
An example, I'll be like, you know, also you like this game because it does something like this. You know, like right I'll try and like put it in my own way that helps me understand it better. Yeah, and it and it helps. And that's what makes a good teacher or at least a good listener is being able to comprehend and say back how you think it was. And if nothing else, at least confirms, OK, maybe I don't get it. Can you explain it further? Yeah. And that's pretty much where I'm at most of the time. and I've had that happen a lot, especially like at work. There are times where my boss will explain something to me. So i I say it back in fifth grade language and she's like, no, not exactly. It's more like this. and And that helps a lot. Right. That's how you learn. And that's how they understand that you comprehend. It's like, because sometimes like not to go off in too far of a tangent, but I recently had
00:57:55
Speaker
a very lengthy and frankly exhausting conversation. And if the person is listening, they know who they are and then we've already made up and everything's okay. Um, so we're cool. Um, but I just want to bring it up that the reason it was exhausting was because there was a comprehension error between things that we were trying to convey to each other. And and we had both realized, Hey, we don't really talk that much. Like ah we're both having all these stumbling blocks about how we think we understand. So we kept trying to reflect back to one another what we thought the other one was saying. And yet there was still holes missing and it went on for so long. And I think it would have been better if we had a phone call versus a text message exchange, but.
00:58:38
Speaker
The fact of the matter is, is just like that reflective listening helps. Cause at least you know, like, okay, either I got it or I fucking don't, right? Like, do I get it? Cause I'm trying to understand. And sometimes it's you that you're really just not getting it. But if you're constantly being talked at and trying to confirm and you're not getting it right, it could very well be that they are not conveying properly. One ah one of the things I like about asking what people are mean by repeating back in low layman's terms about things is it pushes them to do the same. Like if they're like, no, you didn't exactly get it. They're not going to repeat it back as technical as they did before. They're going to repeat it back kind of at the same level that I just gave. Uh, so even if it didn't work the first time, there's a good chance it'll make more sense for me the second time. Cause I, I just don't do well with like super high techno jargon stuff.
00:59:35
Speaker
Um, my workplace does it all the time where we have like these big company-wide meetings and they talk about all these different reports and going up a point and a half in this thing and a half percentile in this thing and action plans, deliverables and stuff. And my head just starts swimming. I'm like, I need it in layman's terms. I need like simple, easy to understand things. If you want me to keep up with the conversation at the rate it's going. Yeah. You need it to be simple and clean.
01:00:05
Speaker
Right. it's a care sort reference or is There's a good say. I thought you might appreciate that. Um, but like I'll be fine eventually. Right. If I can go back and read through what was said or listened to it again slowly, I can parse everything. But if you want me to hear, like these are all live streamed and they're not recorded. It's like, if you want me to hear it over a live stream, not recorded it real time. you got to break it down a little bit better because it's just too much too fast. Um, so that's why I like to use the whole, like break it into super simple terms as best I understand it and see where it goes from there. Yep. So, I mean, there you go. If you want to get better at speaking comfortably in group settings, try reflective listening, try at least active listening, try asking questions. People like to talk about themselves.
01:00:58
Speaker
Uh, well, most people do, even if they say they don't a lot of times, like if you catch them at the right, if you say, tell me about yourself, most people don't know even where to start. But if you ask but specific questions, most people will start to spill whether they realize it or not. Uh, especially if it if it's in a social setting. Um, so there you go. That's, that's how I'd say it. You have to practice it. You're not going to get good at it overnight. Uh, one more tip I have before we wrap up is if you are there with a, like whoever your closest friend is, tag them before the group chatter starts and tell them what you asked, like confide in them and say, Hey, cause I've had friends tell me this, or I would check in with them. Cause I recognize like, Oh, Hey, they don't talk much or I'll try to direct the conversation to them so they can get a word in.
01:01:44
Speaker
but not everybody thinks to do that. Um, but ask a friend, go in there with a battle buddy. That way they can direct the conversation back to you. Or if you're bad with names, they'll make sure to say people's names a lot more so you can make sure to remember it. Um, that's one thing I do a lot to wing man. My friends are like, Hey, Dave, this is my friend, uh, Danny. Uh, Danny, again, this is Dave. Dave, do you remember this or Dave? Do you remember that? Like the moment I'm just. Huh? ah You will need to do that for me, yes. Yeah, 100 percent all the time. I'll always do it um because or if I don't know who it is, I'm totally 100 percent fine to say, hey, please forgive me. I forgot your name. Can you remind me what it is again? um And most people are like, yeah, whatever. It's Dave. and You're like, OK, cool. Thanks, Dave. I'm going to say her name a bunch so I can remember. They go, all right. adam You fucking crazy guy like I Dave. See you later, Dave. Bye, Dave. You know, and then people just think it's funny and then they just roll with it and then they move on with their day.
01:02:36
Speaker
Um, but anyway, don't take it so seriously. Have fun with it. but If you're genuine, people will notice that. And then they'll remember that you asked to remember that you had followups that remember that you commented on something that they said they'll remember that you remembered. And that means a lot to a lot of people. Trust me because nobody thinks anybody cares about anything that they say. That's why everybody talks about themselves constantly hoping that something they say will be interesting enough to keep someone's attention. But subconsciously, they're worried that nothing they're saying is landing. So if you reflect something back and you say something sincere about what they said, they will remember who you are, even if they don't remember your name um and seems inconsequential.
01:03:16
Speaker
Especially if it's dumb and it seems kind inconsequential, especially because they're just throw away jokes hoping if it doesn't land, they move on real quick. And if you say, oh, yeah, I remember when you made that joke about the flower pot and you're like, and like, oh, you were listening to that. Yeah. Yeah, it was funny. You know. You know. vase to vase. That's hilarious. yeah You know, that's somewhere else. Exactly. You know, just something like that. That just kind of like really lets you get in there and like show them that like you give a shit. But have a battle buddy go with you and just like toss toss you some softballs.
01:03:56
Speaker
Like, Oh, Hey, Oh, that reminds me. You know what, Danny also plays Alden Ring. Danny, what was your build? And then there you go. Now you get a chance to talk, have a wing man there. If you're really struggling to get in there at first or have them set you up with information ahead of time that you can ask about it. Maybe they're newer friends or something. Or finally, if you, as you said, a lot of these people are friends that you don't even think know you that well, get one on one time with them, spend more time with them, build that rapport, and then they will want to protect you when you're in those social settings and make sure you're included because they love you. yeah So like, you know there's a lot of ways to attack this. You just have to like pick a lane and fucking get in there. And it's, it's not just you actually over the weekend. I had a situation where I was in a group of people I didn't know. And normally I'm a lot better than I used to be, but I clammed right up. And, uh, it really sucks because it was like semi-famous people and I really wanted to meet them, but I froze. Yep. That'll happen.
01:04:58
Speaker
Yeah. And that's okay. Cool. Next year I'll try and meet them again. Yeah. And that's okay.
01:05:06
Speaker
Um, cause sometimes you just, it's okay to just listen. It's okay to compose yourself. Um, you don't always have to be talking, but if you're the one that's almost never talking, it's good to chime in once in a while, but Anyway, how about we do a quick little recap before we wrap up this episode? Because I I'll be honest, I got lost in the sauce of of all the tangents. I don't remember what we were even asking about. You know what? The original question was, how do I talk comfortably in group settings? That was that right. Right. So first question we talked about was if you find a cockroach in your house and you kill it, do you have to tell your anxiety ridden roommate? We discussed that and some tips on, you know, how you can
01:05:48
Speaker
approach those subjects without causing any sort of panic. We talked about how like, oh, someone that you thought disliked you said that you were, ah you know, hard to approach. What does it mean if you're hard to approach whenever some ways you can tackle that? um And then we learned the word glabrous, which means something that is smooth or devoid of hair. that um And then finally, we just talked about how you can learn how to speak more comfortably in group settings and in just general social settings by asking questions and being curious. So hopefully, listeners out there, you learned something and you enjoyed the ride and the little peppering in of just random nerd shit we talked about, video game related. And finally, hi, Terry. Hi, Gabe. They won't be hearing this for a while. They're in the Savannah right now.
01:06:38
Speaker
Hey, that's OK. Hey, I hope you guys, when you listen to this, that you had a great trip in the Savannah. I don't know where that is. I'm assuming it's Africa. Yeah, um they're in Africa. You guys are in Africa. That's crazy. Got a picture of my mom kissing a giraffe. Bunch of don't do that. Your husband's there. Terry, what are you doing? that No, I was. God, oh, it's consensual. ah Yeah, that's fine. um You know, but just don't catch any salmonella Fitzgerald while you're there.
Travel Vaccinations and Listener Engagement
01:07:06
Speaker
They had to get such a huge range of vaccinations before they went. Oh, yeah. There's there's a lot there that we don't have to contend with here this year. yeah They had to go for like three separate appointments to get like like whole bundles of shots all at the time. Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
01:07:24
Speaker
Well, I hope that you you all had a safe trip back if you're listening. And hey, other listeners, if you had a vacation and you're listening to this after a vacation or just a good mental health day, that's fantastic. I'm happy to hear it. And we would love to hear all about it. And Terry, I don't know when you're going to hear this, um but would you and Gabe consider maybe writing in on our website at fun of sellers network dot com slash contact us? Because I would love to get just a wonderfully written little note from you guys because Danny tells me that you especially Cherry thinks that I'm just a bees knees but I don't really know much about you and I'd like to hear get some more correspondence with you and hey listen Dixon and all the other listeners that we have if your moms want to send me a letter
01:08:08
Speaker
um I'm getting weird. com It's not weird. I'm just trying to make friends. It's got a photo sellers that were dot com slash contact us and send us a little notey note to say, hey, here's a little bit about me. How are you? You know, maybe here's a power up that I put in here for you to use for when you have a bad day. Not you know my listeners. We don't want to hear from you. We want to hear specifically from your mothers. From this particular episode, I don't want to hear a damn thing from the listeners. I want to hear from your moms or your dads or if you don't have moms and dads from whoever your closest guardian or sibling might be uncle, aunt, grandmother, sister, brother. I want to hear from a family member. OK.
01:08:49
Speaker
If you want to just send me ah ah a voice clip on our website of your dog barking, that's fine, too. Just tell us who they are when they are doing it. I just want to hear from your family for once. So that would be fantastic. Tell them Adam sent you and they say, who the fuck is Adam? You say, send him a letter and find out. si Oh, yeah. yeah Anyway, Danny, what do you want to say to the listeners before you wrap up? ah I'm sorry for that is my first. I feel like this is the third time I've had to say that you have to say anything.
01:09:27
Speaker
No, I do have one thing I have to say, and that is that this is a dream come true for me. And, you know, thank you all for that because I will never let it get dropped.
01:09:40
Speaker
My wife's D and&D channel is starting back up on Wednesday. It is the Role Players Guild, spelled R-O-L-L. So check them out on YouTube or still streaming on YouTube for now, I think. yeah Might be moving back to Twitch. but ah So check them out Wednesday if you like um ah Dungeons and Dragons. I think they're also doing an Avatar The Last Airbender inspired TTRPG. Um, if you want to keep up with me and my voice acting escapades, uh, I am reading stories for, uh, strange stories from odd folks. Uh, and I just did another story that was just posted called, if you see these tracks run. So if you want to hear me do some, some actual voice acting, including female parts, that was great. I'm sure. Um, listen to that.
01:10:41
Speaker
I think that's it for me, Adam. I love when Danny is female parts. um i Anyway, that's it for us. Thanks for listening. And in the meantime, please take care of your mind, your heart, and most importantly, each other. Stay glabrous out there. yeah
01:12:31
Speaker
Bye!