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Blast from the Past is a Boy Mom Movie
29 Plays12 days ago
Rena and Paige discuss their opposition to toys at the playground (yes, again), Blast from the Past starring Brendan Fraser, and, like good trad wives, how they clean their floors.
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Transcript
Impact of Videos on Personal Image
00:00:09
Speaker
Under the heat of how bad these videos have made me look, I swear. I disagree. I watched them. oh you think I think Rina's looking pretty good lately. Yeah? It's time to do some supermodels. Oh, your hair looks good.
00:00:20
Speaker
Oh, it's well slept on. No, it's I like the way just it it waves look, the curls. It happened to fluff today. i i don't control that. It fluffed just the right way. The hair does what it does, you know? Ha ha ha.
00:00:35
Speaker
Ha ha ha.
Humor and Hair Bias: Family Anecdotes
00:00:37
Speaker
Oh, our children have incredible hair, though. We will say. Yeah, that's true. We've grown some good hair on those kids. So at least they have that. Yeah. I mean, i feel like hair is 50% of the battle in North America. yeah Yeah. In terms of what matters. Yeah. Yeah.
00:00:53
Speaker
Mike thinks that I am luxest against people who don't have hair. Oh, you are? Like against the baldies? Yeah, or people balding bald people.
00:01:03
Speaker
Well, don't don't take an aerial view of my husband. Wait, what are you talking about? Slowly but surely, the time will come when he looks like a gym teacher.
00:01:14
Speaker
um Your husband, by the way, was a hero at
Heroic Husband: Playground Rescue
00:01:19
Speaker
the playground this morning. I want to make sure everyone knows about this. Yeah. I mean, we always talk about our kids our kids falling off the playground, my kids falling off the playground. Yeah.
00:01:29
Speaker
And this time, I heard a woman frantically – know, and there's like a special voice when something serious is happening. Yes. She sounded extra frantic. I hate that voice. And then – And at the time – You thought it was me? When your husband jumped in to save the day, was already on my phone saying,
00:01:52
Speaker
talking He knew I was doing a customer service thing on the phone. Oh. And I hung up all sad. And he's like, give me the phone. So he was in the middle of trying to be a hero. Double hero. And then this kid was falling from the playground. And he had the phone like cradled against his shoulder and rescued the child. Wow. plummeted to his...
00:02:16
Speaker
to being totally fine but I picked good one probably crying and then and then he walked over to me after he was done saving the child he walked over to me and was like he hung up like the person the customer service what were you trying to do is it a phone for the because my water is turned off oh yeah and they said they can't they told me they can't do anything if I'm not the owner but aren't they like not allowed to do that to people to like residents Well, where were we? my husband's a hero. Your husband is a hero. chose And now he's watching all three of our kids. Which is a lot.
00:02:54
Speaker
For him. For, yeah. He's never done that before. Yeah. I mean, three is, but he can carry them all at once. So, yeah. That's true. He's proven that. Worst case scenario. Could have to get him some Tylenol for later, but it's good.
00:03:09
Speaker
i mean, I feel very vindicated in my marriage slash pregnancy choice. Letting him knock you Letting him knock me up and marry me.
Navigating Daycare Logistics and Responsibilities
00:03:17
Speaker
Yeah. Took a lot of convincing. It's paying off. It's paying off. Yeah. It's good. Yeah.
00:03:23
Speaker
Now i need my husband to do something. What do you need him do? compete with yours. Oh, yeah. Isn't this how it should work? Like, they're competing with each other. Well, tell him the stories of the tales of the heroic actions of my husband.
00:03:37
Speaker
Your new child care situation. Well, maybe. Which friend was, she wanted, it seemed like she wanted to hear more about it. Should get out the handbook? I'm just kidding. I don't want to do I would love to read that handbook. I'll send it to you. Yeah, send it to me. I won't read it on the podcast. But I can't, yeah, can't. It's actually really difficult. Do you have to sign an NDA to get the handbook? No NDAs. We signed something. Look, did we read every paragraph?
00:04:01
Speaker
Absolutely not. But you're not on the, I guess you are on the hook. you're on the hook for your mom. Or is it like... We're on the hook. No, we gave a deposit for sure, yeah, to get the spot. Yep, we're on the hook. Is there anything crazy in the hamburger? Do you remember anything No, everything seemed awesome, actually. yeah everything was like incredibly sweet and very flowery and nice and... Yeah.
00:04:23
Speaker
Very nice. Everything was like the way I would want it to be, I guess. Yeah. They're like, stay as long as you want, whatever your kid needs. Like, you know, if you need help from us, just give a wink. Like, you know, stuff like that. Like signal. Like it's like if if your kid's having trouble with the transition in the morning, you know, like...
00:04:43
Speaker
And you think they're the only way that they would know that is if you wink at them? They won't hear your child screaming and crying? Look, I'm obviously going to have a secret handshake with these people. I mean, it's a specific society. It is. Freemason.
00:04:55
Speaker
No, just kidding. But you're going to you know, you're joining a world of people who are very relaxed in a way. Like, in a way, their lives are very easy. i mean, i i could would imagine there's some people like us whose parents are paying. Like, we can't be the only ones.
00:05:18
Speaker
I wonder. But also people. And they also give financial aid. So there is there will be people who get financial aid. I wonder how I haven't talked to them about the financial Because you don't don't need it. Well, i'm I'm thinking like we'll pay this year and then next year we'll be like, we'd love to stay, but we want to pay.
00:05:37
Speaker
See, but I wonder if you're like, if they know though that you're getting help, then they'd be like, why would we give you money? They don't know. i they' I don't think we told them. I don't know if we told them. i ah My husband's been the only the sole communicator at this point.
00:05:52
Speaker
That's nice. Keep that going. He's had a better vibe. I try to divvy things up because I hear all the time moms being like, I'm the only one taking him to the doctor. I'm the only one. I'm like, no, this we got to make sure from the beginning that we're both doing like – The paperwork-y type stuff. See, I just don't.
00:06:09
Speaker
I'm simply much better at that sort of thing. I'm going to it. If doesn't bother you. I mean. Yeah, no. i might I do everything. Like, it's fine. It takes each, both of us a whole lot. Like, it takes us a whole day maybe to make one appointment.
00:06:21
Speaker
Like, Truly. And like the emotional and. Between
Playground Dynamics: Toy Sharing and Cultural Insights
00:06:25
Speaker
the two of you. Yeah. Between the two of us. So it's like, I'm lucky that he's taking this on. He's just, I think really witnessed how burnt out I am and really wanted to make it happen. As soon as my mom brought up the idea, i was initially very reticent and like.
00:06:41
Speaker
Me too. I also, I also feel bad. Like I don't necessarily want someone else paying, ah but like. At this point, yeah, like I said, it's either she helps us with our lives or she pays for this and I get a job. So it's like a face with that question. Like I'd pick the latter over the former.
00:07:01
Speaker
um i should have eaten a snack before this. You hungry? angry Maybe I'll have an apple soon. we are We're podcasting. Things are a little different today. We're podcasting later than usual. a little later. Yeah.
00:07:14
Speaker
um So what you were saying, the playground this morning was very overstimulating. What was going on? there just There's just a lot of kids. Yeah. A lot of kids and a lot of exciting toys.
00:07:27
Speaker
a thatet No matter how much I... Talk about how much I hate toys at the playground very loudly to everyone all the time. never Well, like I said, I used to bring them defensively in Brooklyn because everybody brought toys. So it was like a toy economy. You brought something to the table and you made an exchange. Actually, my friend was talking me about this, the toy bringing the toys thing, because she also doesn't like bring toys the playground. But she says for some. Like sand or water. yeah A lot of time.
00:07:54
Speaker
Everybody has. So if your kid doesn't have a toy. Your kid can borrow. I said to target. What I told her was to target the family like a one-year-old, like a younger child. And they never care about sharing. Like young kids. Because the kid doesn't notice. And the parents are always like, Eloise is so good at sharing. Oh, yes. Such a talent at that age. My 10-month-old is amazing at sharing. So I'm like, but if you ask them if you could borrow it. To fair, think my kid was already bad at it at that age. Well, he was very advanced. He's unique. Oh, yeah. Precocious. Precocious. Yes, of course. Yeah. No, but you do regret it. Especially, mean, in Brooklyn, every playground in the summer has water going. Yeah, yeah. They all have splash pads. Splash pads, yeah. Which is fun. It is fun. It's a completely different scenario. But that's the toy. To me, you don't need toys a splash No, you the cup. The cup kind of the whole game. I guess when you're younger.
00:08:48
Speaker
You want something to do with the water. That's not just your hands. Because everyone else has. Literally every single one the kids. But if other kids didn't, then... But you would find it's like people have cups from like old iced coffee cups sometimes. Yeah, they'll find me. It's like they'll play with trash if they don't have toys. Like...
00:09:07
Speaker
yeah It's just they just want stuff. But at least it's not creating new trash. But that's why it was okay in Brooklyn because it's like you knew what to expect. Like everybody had. Yeah, that's true. It was specific culture. So you'd make an exchange. It was usually just cars, just cars usually for him. I want to play with this car. You play with that car. Everybody's happy if you make an exchange.
00:09:28
Speaker
And it kind of wasn't so bad. But here it's like I don't know. It's different here. I mean, obviously New York is different than L.A. Yeah. Did you know that New York and l LA are different? They're different. People get weirder about their toys here because it's just not as common. so it's Well, it's a more, I think it's just a more individualistic.
00:09:48
Speaker
yeah so Yeah. It was more common. It's like everybody knew at the playgrounds, if you bring a toy, it's everybody's. Yeah. That's the rule. I'm trying to think of like other stuff. Do you have any, did
Parenting Norms: New York vs. LA
00:09:57
Speaker
you go to the free fee playground?
00:10:00
Speaker
The cool playground? Yeah. We did go, but yeah, nothing really that dramatic was happening. i mean, there is, okay, there is a slide there that you can't really see. It's a tunnel slide.
00:10:11
Speaker
So I can't really see inside the slide. Yeah. um So there was like one kid. There was a mother there with three boys, which I was like, good for you. That's your husband right now. that's how it But I was like, I think she was a doctor because I was like three kids. like But she had one of those like lanyards from some kind of hospital. So i was like, she must be. it shes She had doctor vibes.
00:10:36
Speaker
Okay. You what I mean? Like kind of- They're not usually just wearing their lanyards around them. She took it off eventually. Okay. Because at first I was like, are you like, are they in some kind of program yeah Are you on duty right now? Yeah. But no, she just had three boys. Because I was like, because she kept being like this name, that name. I was like, how many children are you responsible for right now? But then I was trying kind of joking. But yeah, she had three boys and- um A couple of them kept wanting to like hide inside the slide and like be the monster inside the slide.
00:11:05
Speaker
So my kid kept trying to be like, no, get out of there. It's my turn. You know, so there was a bit of conflict. Oh, because they had something they were doing. Yeah. They had a clear game going. And your kid was like, well, I just want to go down the slide. Yeah, just because it's a slide. And because this game is maybe like a little bit older to qualify to play. So it's like he couldn't really participate well in the game. And so the kids just kept being annoyed because he was like younger but still asserting his power and using the slide and they kept wanting to play the game. And that's something that you don't need to interfere, like right? now Like that's a more like they can figure this out. I didn't interfere but she kept trying to go up the slide and take her kid out of the slide.
00:11:44
Speaker
so there was like a lot of like slide congestion on. Yeah, yeah. Where I think she felt bad. And didn't realize that it was okay. But a lot of parents have like secondhand embarrassment, I think, when their kids are behaving in a way that they don't want them to. like um And it's hard, too, because a lot of parents treat it like it's your behavior. like it's like or they're weird about it. Do you feel like that's worse here than in New York?
00:12:11
Speaker
I mean… You just didn't encounter as many parents in New York. i saw I saw some parents, but there was a lot of language barriers with parents in New York. There was a lot of different languages going on. So you don't know what they're saying to their kids. I don't know what they're saying. like And I was like, and they some of them are from countries where I'm like, oh, what was going on there? who knows? Different vibes on the playground in Ukraine or wherever they came from, you know?
00:12:35
Speaker
um So, I mean, the parents from other countries in Brooklyn, I'll say, were a lot more laissez-faire and had more kids. ah So there was a lot less of judgment from them, I felt. Yes, a lot less.
00:12:50
Speaker
But I think that's also because culturally, there's just more overwhelm from the amount of kids you have. like And there's maybe more of like a collectivism in their native countries. Yeah.
00:13:02
Speaker
So yeah, yeah, I did feel kind of less judgment there. And they're do you think they're more likely to help out your kid? Like it's just not as big of a deal to – help out other kids or um share snacks with – share snacks, share toys. Yeah, they didn't care at all. Yeah, nobody cared about that type of stuff. Yeah.
00:13:25
Speaker
Whereas here a little – Sometimes they'd be keeping track. They'd be like, that oh one is mine though, so give it back when you're done. I'd just be like, yeah, okay. I remember really appreciating – it was ah It was a weekend and there was a parent at the park who who comes frequently and she's from another she's from China and she just helped your kid get climb up a ladder yeah without anyone. That felt more like Brooklyn. I yeah i was going to single her out and be like, her vibe is more what I experienced. Yeah, yeah. And that's just attitude. It's just like another kid there and yeah yeah whatever. She just helped him. She wasn't like, oh, I don't know this kid.
00:14:02
Speaker
Right. Yeah. Yeah. There's more of a weird, but it might be a class thing too. Like I said, like I think it was just more middle class where I was living in Brooklyn. And here there's some upper crusty. You are naturally fancy in many ways. People have said this to me. I think it's my accent. I have a weird accent that sounds. I think it's the accent. Like a snobby accent. Yeah. which but That's why you can you can code switch.
00:14:26
Speaker
You can communicate well with rich people. Right. Because you have the accent. I don't know. But who knows? and Not that there's some great ethics to being rich. Like, a I mean, I don't know what I mean. I mean, I try to think I think I'd be a definitely an ethically worse person whenever i if I have rich friends or whatever, I'm always like they're a much better person than I would be with that much money, like 100 percent.
00:14:51
Speaker
You think they're more responsible with the money they have? think my morals would degrade considerably. i do. Would you, if you were super rich, would you give your money to people, all like friends and family?
00:15:04
Speaker
i i yeah I'd be very irresponsible with my money in that way. one hundred percent. Yeah. I'd be like, no, come with me and do this expensive thing. I'll just pay for you. Yeah. Yeah, yeah for sure. But that's nice. I mean, at a certain threshold, if you can actually afford that.
00:15:18
Speaker
I would spend it all. Yeah. Right. Well, I'm going to, the second you strike, you strike gold, I'm going to hang around you knowing that you're going to be treating me. No, my husband and I have often been like, Hey, if we win a big, we'll, we'll buy Mike and Paige's house for them. And like, or or like we'll buy a duplex with them or something like, we'll all live together. We'll all benefit. We'll figure it out I'll watch your kid.
00:15:41
Speaker
I keep telling you. ah No, we'll watch. our I mean, Lord knows what we'll do. But I mean, that's, yeah, that's like pipe dream. I mean, ah didn't they prove that the lottery's rigged or didn't somebody, didn't like Epstein win it three times or something?
00:15:57
Speaker
Wait, really? That's what I thought. Oh, I can't tell what's conspiracy theory anymore because I never bother checking these TikToks. Oh, you're they're just, they're coming. You're watching so many of them, i think. They go right subliminally and then I'm like, so I i do think i have a I have a file in my head that's due that's like, this is dubious information that like could be true and could not. But then it's like, what's the point? Why even learn the information? um It's like rumors. It's like hearing gossip.
00:16:24
Speaker
You're like, this could be true. And it's interesting. It's flashy. yeah It's a story. it stuck with me. Is it true? i don't know. But I'm glad it doesn't go all the way to truth immediately, at least.
00:16:37
Speaker
But yeah, got to get off my phone. I got to get off my phone. Yeah. Are you doing it at night? I do while i while I breastfeed, which I'm toning down, which I think contributed to my mental breakdown last week. Oh, you think so? I do. yeah the hormonal dip from weaning because I'm slowing it down considerably. Oh, that probably yeah does explain a lot. i had Which I didn't say. I had a nervous breakdown.
00:17:01
Speaker
Last week, I had- Rena had a nervous breakdown. There was a morning where I could not stop crying and I made my husband stay home from work because I it. So that was combination luteal phase and weaning probably. Honestly, like I think so. It's hard be- And sleep. It's hard to be bird's eye about it. Lack of sleep contributed.
00:17:22
Speaker
i think just like it's been two and a half years of 11 hour days and it's just
Emotional Challenges of Solo Parenting
00:17:28
Speaker
too much. Yeah. I mean, like, it's too many hours in a row alone. For you to be alone. Yeah, that's the problem. It's if there there's no break. Like, so it's like, it's been too long. And I think maybe...
00:17:42
Speaker
that Something to like maybe I'm feeling safe enough that like I feel like I like like the information that he's starting a program soon went into my subconscious and they're like, OK, time to time to unload all these feelings we've been holding on to. But I'm like, wait, we don't actually have time or space for that right now. Like, but we took one day and it helped, you know.
00:18:03
Speaker
I don't know. Or it's the weaning. I truly – also do need to go back to therapy. I mean, that much is clear. you have any – are you at all trying to embrace every moment, like knowing that he's going to in child carousel? Yeah, no, I'm feeling very sad about it.
00:18:17
Speaker
Yeah, it's very sad. Yeah, definitely. And also if it doesn't, you can pull him if it – I know. Well, but I'll have a job at that point hopefully. Yeah.
00:18:28
Speaker
so We probably wouldn't be able to do that. But we'll see. And if he really needs it, then yeah, we will. I mean, obviously we'll put him first, but like,
00:18:40
Speaker
Yeah, we'll just see we'll just take it one day at a time, you know. But no, I do feel really sad about it. But I'm also going to be alone with him for five hours afterwards. So it's not like zero. you won't go to bed. Right. Wait, do they nap? My husband gets home at 8. They nap there, yeah.
00:18:56
Speaker
so So he'll probably still be up late. Yeah, I'll pick him up at 3 and be with him till 8 before my husband gets home. So that's so decent it's still five hours a day, just me and him. So it's not nothing. Like, you know, it's just not 11 hours.
00:19:12
Speaker
No, it's a big, I mean, yeah, it's cutting it. a huge difference. but And you don't get, yeah, the mornings. I mean, the mornings are the best time. like They're in the best mood in the morning. Yeah. He's going to be drained. He's going to be drained. We'll probably have like low stim hanging out at home time is what I imagine. Although he loves lots of stimulation. So he might still want to go. He might want to go to the park.
00:19:32
Speaker
Yeah, we'll have to see. That's what I'm trying to figure out too. like Yeah, what? If my older kid is supposed to start kindergarten, if he, what what's he going to need? Like, is he going to need to chill or is he going to need to go crazy at the park because he was like sitting at a desk doing worksheets all day or whatever? I mean, maybe it's just combo, like an hour or two at the park and then an hour or two of chill time, like.
00:19:55
Speaker
I feel like as long as there's some consistency. A bit of a routine. Yeah. yeah I don't know, though. Yeah, it'd be hard to say. I mean, they have similar personalities, so we'll see. Right, how they maybe. If they both pan out the same way.
00:20:09
Speaker
they might i mean, I could see them wanting high stim, but actually needing low stim. Needing to chill. Yeah. Well, that's what you're hoping for, right? I don't know. Or would would you, do you feel like you're going to want to like take him to the park and...
00:20:24
Speaker
It's hard to say. I don't know what I'm going to want because I don't know what my day is going to look like. Like obviously if I'm doing nothing but cleaning the house before, like it's like, but if I have this like crazy job that started at 6 a.m. and ended at 2. That's social. Like that's like, then I might be a little. you could You should be working at a diner. Obviously you should be working at a diner. I will be probably. Yeah. that Those are the hours. Get some pineapple earrings and just go for it.
00:20:50
Speaker
Just accept that you're like – That's who I am. You're know like a diner. You're – cream of milk. Alice doesn't live here anymore. yeah What is it? um good kiss Kiss my grits.
00:21:01
Speaker
That's you. You got to assume who you were meant to be. final form. And I say that with jealousy because like – work at a diner? I just feel like like I like – All of my favorite movies are like middle-aged, single mom. You have to be a single mom Sassy. Middle-aged, sassy, single mom working at a diner. yeah Like that's a teleops what I aspire to. So my table is to get a bigger tip. Trying to put them through college with this job. You're going to have to start smoking again. Oh my God. I wish. i love cigarettes. Just cigarettes. Sober people can smoke cigarettes, right? Not with a kid. oh
00:21:38
Speaker
I can't smoke with a kid. I can't. I can't do it. Although, I mean, my husband's mom smoked when he was in utero. And he's great. He's hero. He's a hero.
00:21:52
Speaker
He really is a hero. He's also an eldest child. So it's like he's used to taking care of people or something. I don't know. he's got How many siblings does have? Just one. Yeah. Okay. He's an elder child. Elder. Yeah. This whole thing, like eldest daughters. yeah. But then it's just like you have one younger sibling, like Taylor Swift is an eldest daughter. yeah My sister's an eldest daughter. But she actually is.
00:22:14
Speaker
No, she's middle. My brother's older than her. But she's the eldest daughter. She's the girl. Technically. Oh, you mean if you don't have any other any sisters? Okay, so if you're an eldest daughter if you're an eldest daughter, it seems like classically you should just be the oldest of at least three daughters. Oh, well or
00:22:36
Speaker
ah and the eldest. I mean, my niece is like that. She's an eldest daughter. Yes. And she like – And has multiple siblings. She started running a summer camp at like 13. Like in her house. Like she's very good at – she's very – So she's a classic eldest daughter. Leadership oriented. Yeah.
00:22:55
Speaker
But yeah. No, people are claiming it. Yeah. I don't – if you have an older sibling, even if your older sibling is a boy, are you really –
00:23:05
Speaker
i depends on i think it depends on the... I mean, sibling... kind all like Family dynamics are so complex. Because you could have role reversals, you know?
00:23:17
Speaker
I could be an eldest daughter. If you're treated like the eldest, like it's like if you're the one that has to sponge up the burden of all the emotional responsibilities, like it's really just who takes it on or who's expected to take it on. And that's all projection from the parents. So a lot of it's so hard to say, you know, my parents were eldest siblings and they didn't want my brother to feel that way or so they've communicated to me.
00:23:43
Speaker
So my brother's like less classically the eldest sibling vibe. Because they didn't want him feel burden. They went out of their way to make him not feel that way. Yeah, yeah.
00:23:54
Speaker
So there's like projections and it depends on the birth order of your parents. I'm like, I don't know, you know. But it's true. My parents' generation does seem preoccupied with birth order. Yeah, my parents are both the oldest and i think.
00:24:09
Speaker
They're very much. They're biased for the oldest. Yeah. And you're not the oldest. And the youngest. Right. the young Or the younger of two kids. But I also feel like I don't, and I only have one sibling who's a boy.
00:24:26
Speaker
have a sister? no you have one sibling? Yeah. Okay. So. younger of two. Yeah. the younger of Yeah. But in many ways, I don't feel like a youngest child.
00:24:37
Speaker
Because it's only two. Yeah. Yeah. three. So I don't know. if I feel like you need at least three to really assume the youngest yeah or the oldest. That's what I had. Yeah. The youngest like of three where you're the baby.
00:24:52
Speaker
Right. And then there's something about being in the middle that's like distinctly little child. Yes. That's my sister. Yes. Yeah. I don't know what that is, but it doesn't look
Family Dynamics and Cousin Connections
00:25:02
Speaker
appealing. To be the middle. Yeah, because you're not the eldest and you're not the youngest. You're just like kind of sandwiched over there.
00:25:09
Speaker
Yeah. Who are you? You're not – yeah, because you're not the you're not the baby. You're not the cute one, but you're not the responsible one that everyone trusts. Yeah. Okay. I'm trying to think of other playground stories.
00:25:22
Speaker
Or do you have any What's been going on? Well, we came to visit you. Yeah. We haven't been at the playground. We came to visit you on basically California's version of Nantucket. That's what, yeah, that's what Rena's calling it. That's what think. Yeah. Paige was trapped with her in-laws. So I had to pay a pity visit. I was like, please rescue me. Oh, my God. And she shows up and she's like, oh, my God. My heroic husband. This the nicest place I've ever seen in my life. was gorgeous. Obviously, some Republican undertones, you know, when things are a little too picturesque. There's some kind of.
00:25:55
Speaker
There's a reason. There's a little under to something dark looming. Make America picturesque again. Yes. And it is picturesque, let me tell you. It is. Yeah. Lots of like blonde preteen boys with fishing rods. Yeah. And those are all like those are all people on vacation.
00:26:14
Speaker
and the the only people actually live there are old white rich people.
00:26:20
Speaker
retirement. 99% of the people. I thought you were going to say 99 years old. Honestly, lot of them are 99 years old. I mean, not a bad place to be if you're that old. yeah. Because it feels like you're back in time. It does a little bit. Kind of But it's like, can that really be good for you to spend – Apparently, it's good for dementia to pretend like you live in the past.
Social Class and Cultural Impact on Parenting
00:26:44
Speaker
Oh, really? Yeah. If everything, if they set it up exactly like it was in the past, they operate better. So you're just. Oh, but if things are changing. yeah You're an older model in a newer world. Yeah.
00:26:56
Speaker
We just watch. I'm going to talk about a movie. Okay. We watch Blast from the Past. Oh, God. haven't seen it. I love them. That's what the girl from. No, it's not. No, it is. Yeah. And the guy from Brendan Fraser. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
00:27:11
Speaker
and And they were just living in their like bomb shelter home from 19 – early – like the early 60s until the late ninety s And emerged and they were like, oh my God, what is this place? That's a fun concept.
00:27:30
Speaker
Obviously, it's one of the greatest movies I've ever seen. Oh. What did you love about it or what did you want to say about it? um Well, that – oh, that was – it was a good boy-mom movie actually. Oh? So I think it is okay to talk about. Okay. What's the role of Because it's – and he's like the perfect child. So it's a couple with one son, Brendan Fraser. Wait, Brendan Fraser is their son? Yeah.
00:27:51
Speaker
Oh. And – Who's the other person in the couple? Christopher Walken was the dad. And – Wow, what great cat And so he – and then – – The son was just being raised underground. Whoa. never leaving. I mean, this is sort of my dream. Never leaving the shelter. He's just with his parents all the time. That's your dream. And they teach him everything. You know, he's homeschooled, obviously. And he knows everything. Okay. Yeah.
00:28:18
Speaker
And then when he emerges into the present day, he's just like the most polite person in the world. And he is a very kind boyfriend. Yeah. Person to date because he just spent all his time watching how his father treated his mother. And then he there's this great dance scene. And he's like, I had dance lessons every single day.
00:28:43
Speaker
Because he you know his parents were using a curriculum from 1961 or whatever. My grandmother gave all three of her boys, she sent them to learn ballroom dancing. And I've been considering it actually for his future. Oh, I think you should. think we all need to now. It's just like...
00:28:58
Speaker
Oh, it's so classy and dignified. And so appealing to a woman, I think. Yes. And that's why they raised this incredible man. Yeah. And my dad was always great, like, at a bar mitzvah or whatever. He'd take me in like, real dancing, you know? Like, he really knew what he was doing. Right. Actual real dancing. Actually, like – don't teach that anymore. No. People don't teach their kids to dance anymore. We have to do it. Let's send them. They're going to go to dance. then – In honor of my grandmother, I will do it. great great she also made honor of blast from the past she also made them scrub the floors but that's another yeah that's fine too do that too yeah yeah let's scrub and but my kids my kids scrub the floors scrub the floors every day yeah and not every day is she doing it she was doing it they were doing a full top to bottom clean i think i don't know if it was every day but but there was my dad would often jokingly say to me go scrub the floor but they never actually made me do it
00:29:51
Speaker
Do you think you'd be better if They should have made me scrub the floor. Yeah, I had to compensate later in life and get a job as a cleaning person too. No, I did not learn how to clean all. No, it. And I'm terrible at it now. I'm good at it now because I made myself get that job to learn. Oh, yeah, right. You can do that. I can clean. i get yeah I'm available actually. if anybody needs a house clean 200 bucks per yeah plus tip but i don't i feel like that's the going rate like a one or two bedroom okay yeah that's fine it's a lot it's a manual labor you're like oh yeah no i know you sweat yeah i'm a big when i do clean the floors
00:30:30
Speaker
I'm a bit like hands and knees. Like Mike said, we have a moth. And I said, I don't like to do that. No, I want to be on. I want to be on the floor. i mean, it's definitely cleaner on the floor. and i won't do. ah What do they call it? Swiffer? Swiffer. Oh, that that's what I did when I was a kid. It doesn't do anything. That does not clean the mess. It pushes it to the side. It's horrible. I i would I would pro like if I.
00:30:52
Speaker
We're politically active about something that doesn't matter at all. I would protest with because they they're still in I mean, to me, it's a very like 2002. It literally but people still because they're easier. Yeah, just and it's satisfying. It's nice to like look at the bottom looks cleaner. It looks like it does something, but it doesn't. You need a real mop in a bucket like or scrub the floor. I like to use dish soap dish soap to scrub the floor. Okay. I mean, you know.
00:31:17
Speaker
but that's it that i it's getting really clean do it i did with what the honestly the previous tenants just left some pine salt usually i get the stuff that like isn't bad for your adrenal system no no but no you need you need it to be blue purple no it was all the purple stuff is really it's brown but it stinks like pine salt smell like but it said kills 99 of bacteria this is the real trad wife podcast now okay Cleaning, cleaning. Well, actually, I found out from a TikTok that Martha Stewart does not recommend cleaning your dishes with a sponge.
00:31:52
Speaker
She recommends a dish rag to clean them with and then switch it out every time and put it in the laundry. Oh, between cleaning. Yeah, yeah. for Because I hand wash. We don't have a dishwasher. The sponge must be disgusting. I use a sponge. Why clean the sponge? I just clean it.
00:32:11
Speaker
I don't know. And then I switch it up. But why does she think rag instead of sponge? I mean, it makes sense. I don't know because I didn't go more in depth after watching that TikTok. We just know 5% about so many things. But it makes sense to me because the rag could get into the crevices better. Right. Sponge is always frustratingly not getting in there. Trying twist it around.
00:32:31
Speaker
Oh, Lord. We're talking about how heroic our husbands are and dishwashing. This is one for the ages. This is Well, you're going to be a career woman again soon. So you'll be able to take credit. My career serving decaf. Wait, you visited me on the island. Okay, and Paige made me transcend my anxiety to go on a Ferris wheel, which we did talk about last episode.
00:32:54
Speaker
Oh, right. We did. I was like, I wouldn't go on a Ferris wheel. Yeah. And since then, you've gone on a Ferris wheel. We went on. Because I made Protests. Because I paid for it. And I was like. She gave me no choice. I think I said, I'm not flushing that money down the toilet. Yeah. You're going on the Ferris wheel. was like, I don't like peer pressure. I don't want to do this. But then we got on it anyway. And it was, I think I heard some sounds of fun happening. It was fun. so we went to visit you. what What else happened with you on this island? Like, did anything, anything informative? You said going in the water was good. Staying out all day was good.
00:33:26
Speaker
Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay. Um... Yeah, the best way – okay, so being – kids being with grandparents can be tough on everyone. It's a change in routine. comment? And they're getting like endless attention and being – your whims are being indulged constantly. the whims. They were waking up really early from being overexcited. Mm-hmm.
00:33:53
Speaker
and not So they're just sleep deprived and bored. Like this combination of being really excited by getting so much attention, but then also being really bored because there's nothing to actually do in the where they're saying.
00:34:09
Speaker
So they're just looking for trouble. And then I have to horrible correct them and I'm just like on edge the whole time. Or just hearing them get just like nothing but like stop doing that, stop doing that, stop doing that. And i'm just like, oh my God.
00:34:26
Speaker
But the the way around that is to just keep them out all day. Out of the house. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. That's the only way to get through it. And just you come home, yeah like we would just go to the beach for the whole day, go in the water, run around, do sand. Yeah. Come home like four, which is shocking for us.
00:34:47
Speaker
You know, we didn't come home until like four o'clock, take baths, showers, whatever. I was like, you're getting in your pajamas. They protested pajamas up that early. and I'm like, I'm not putting, I'm not going to put you in regular clothes again and then put you in pajamas two hours later. are you crazy? Yeah, that's nuts. So I would put them in their pajamas, have dinner, go to bed.
00:35:09
Speaker
That's it. Okay. Retiree schedule. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, kids, like we said, kids and older people, very aligned. Yeah. So in in some ways it works out very nicely. And it Do they ever like have any comments about your parenting style? I know people get that from like in-laws sometimes.
00:35:27
Speaker
No. Yeah. I'm always, cause I'm, I don't know, overly observant. I'll catch anything. I'll catch everything. I've just heard people complain about this. I don't i don't have this issue because. You're not, they're not. Yeah. they're not around They're not around. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and yeah, I guess my husband's mom worked in childcare for a long time and had two boys and, and she's just young.
00:35:51
Speaker
Yeah, right. It's a different. She's like, I don't know how much older, maybe like 15 years older than me. How much older than me? Yeah, she's, she's like, she's like in her fifty s Yeah. Like, so late 50s, I think, but she's, she's got a young vibe, let's say.
00:36:11
Speaker
There's not a holier than thou about parenting. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And my mom knows better than, I mean, she's just had to let go of so much of Because my brother is religious and has five kids. It's like she's had lots of time to resign herself to letting her kids parent the way they want to parent. you know like Oh, yeah. She had plenty of experience with that before she got to you. before yeah so That's another thing about being youngest. is like there by the If your siblings have kids, by the time they get to you, less pressure. attitude Less pressure, but also less. That's true. yeah For from Mike, their parents, it's their only grandchildren. Right. So it's a lot more.
00:36:50
Speaker
It's all on them. ah Which is a lot of pressure for me. Oh, yeah. That is a lot. Although lots of attention too. But that can have its downsides. Like the fact that they're always the center of the universe. There aren't other kids around. When we go to like family events, there aren't other kids around. There's no cousins. No. Oh, yeah. So they don't have anyone to play with. They're just soaking up adult attention and acting crazy. Oh, that's tough. Yeah.
00:37:20
Speaker
That's why got to have kids. People got have kids. They need to be more kids. Stop making it so mine are the only kids. I don't want them to be. Yeah. I mean, my. You'll notice everything thing they do wrong if they're the only kids. It's bad for Paige. Okay. Specifically. I mean, my brother, but my brother's older than me. So his kids, like they didn't have, I mean, now they would, but they live so far away. But they had each other. Yeah. It's a lot of kids. No, but on the, and on their mom's side, they had.
00:37:46
Speaker
i But I remember the eldest daughter being like, got to have kids. We need more cousins. Like everybody else has cousins. Oh, yeah. Kids like having cousins. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. yeah I think my kids don't.
00:37:58
Speaker
I don't know if they really grasp the concept of cousins because most people they know don't have cousins. Well, we have a mug. have a mug with that whole family on it. So I show it to him as like the cousin cousins mug. Yeah, yeah,
00:38:10
Speaker
So he's like, oh, cousins. Like sometimes he'll look at it and like really get into the concept. of And I try to tell him all their names and like so he'll get to know a little bit because he knows one cousin because we live not far. Yeah. from where we were in Brooklyn. that's cute. And it's cute that he has her. And he met all them like one time, you know? Like um we went to, he was like way too young, but we went to an amusement park.
00:38:37
Speaker
No, cousins cousins are good. um Did you get along with your cousins? i had I have a lot of cousins, but none that were really – I mean, now they seem closer to my age. But at the time, they were all much older, much younger than me.
00:38:55
Speaker
Oh, yeah. When you're a kid, it's a huge difference too, years or three years or something. so i think I think at least three – yeah, at least three years. Yeah. It's the age gap.
00:39:07
Speaker
And i think I just always felt like all of my cousins were like cute little kids and I was like some gross older monster. Oh. Like I was just like an awkward. Yeah. Like I just felt like i was an awkward weirdo and they were like the cute little kids who were like who everyone fawned over. You must have been coming to terms with your childhood ending or something. Yeah. Maybe.
00:39:34
Speaker
Because, yeah, this is when I was like 10, when things were going awry. Like, i you know, I had braces for a long time. Yeah, me too. How many years? Five years. yes and Yeah, same. Yeah. Took a long time. And I don't think it was good. I miss my crooked tooth. I just had one crooked tooth. Oh, yeah my teeth were really bad. Oh, you're fine. Like well huge space between Oh, that could have been cute Right. Now that's. That's like in. Yeah. Yeah.
00:40:01
Speaker
Yeah, I think we're becoming less obsessed with braces as a society. They convinced. I remember the guy selling it to my parents being like they she needs it for her bite. It's very important. Oh, trying to make it sound like it's not. Like it's medical.
00:40:15
Speaker
Yeah. If you don't have a good bite, like how are they going to eat? How are they going to bite things? It's just absurd. You will never not be able to consume don't. People weren't eating food before braces? that Somebody might be a good one.
00:40:31
Speaker
Well, we should end it anyway. Okay, we're going to wrap it up. Love you guys. Peace.