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Braylon! Get Over Here!
27 Plays1 month ago
Rena and Paige discuss how relaxing it can be being a parent in the suburbs, the fact that all very successful people are liars, and most importantly, Paige’s Taco Bell order.
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Transcript
Traveling as a 'Boy Mom'
00:00:11
Speaker
I don't know if I got that. All Boy moms on the road. moms on the road. One boy mom. How's it been going? Potentially. Rena is on her way back to Los Angeles.
00:00:26
Speaker
Oh, yeah. We're on our way back across this wonderful country of ours in all of its glory. but we have seen. Many a tattoo. um Many a cup that says, don't tread on me. Yeah,
00:00:42
Speaker
yeah we've all been jokingly telling each other not to tread on each other.
Family Jokes and Illnesses
00:00:47
Speaker
My child's really into it. He's very into being like, I'm going to tread on daddy. And then we're all like, no. Wow. You guys are doing family bits.
00:01:00
Speaker
We've been sick. My child and I have been sick the entire time. So that's been horrible. um In our nation's capital, we had to go get some Dexo, bora but whatever that stuff is that like cures.
00:01:15
Speaker
um What's it called again? With the bad cough? The scary cough. ah What are you talking about? Croup? Croup. Yes. I want to say whooping cough, but it's not. It's croup.
00:01:27
Speaker
Yeah. Another old-timey sounding. Old-timey, yeah. yeah and It's true. They're all, yeah, children are very street-urchy-y when they're sick. It's like weird, weird term, foot and mouth. Like, it's like weird term. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Disease, like it's all stuff that like adults have moved beyond, but like children still get, because they
Virus Concerns on a Cruise?
00:01:49
Speaker
lick everything. Oh, I've also been really too much going down the rabbit hole about this, um,
00:01:56
Speaker
um What is it called again? The scary thing on the cruise with the virus. Have you heard about this? What? Something recent? Yes. There's a hint of virus outbreak on a cruise and it's like scary and it's like totally triggering from all the pandemic stuff. and Oh, where are you reading this stuff? and My child licks everything. He licks everything. He looked in the mirror at himself and licked it.
00:02:20
Speaker
Tell him to stop doing that. I know, but he doesn't listen to me. He wants to see what happens. No. Oh, oh, oh. you're um His father, your child's father needs to tell him to stop doing that. Oh, oh That's the one who he'll listen to? Okay.
Are Absent Fathers to Blame?
00:02:34
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. No. If there's any behavior stuff, it's all it's all the dad. You don't have to do anything.
00:02:39
Speaker
But what if the dad's not there? That's a big problem. Absent father. Absent father and no rules. Yeah. door The source of all, yeah, any any issues down the line, it's all related to the absent father. It's true. They really have been blaming the mom too much. It's actually the dad's fault.
00:02:59
Speaker
No, it w writtent but it really is. I'll i'll send you i'll send you some articles. Okay.
Hypochondria and Online Comfort
00:03:04
Speaker
i'm very and i And some anecdotes, some real-life anecdotes too. Oh, anecdotes from your real life or your? Oh, yeah.
00:03:12
Speaker
Not my, yeah. I mean, Mike mike is around. Yeah. a lot. So. But it's more just that things are his fault. Yeah, right exactly. Yeah. I love that.
00:03:28
Speaker
Yeah. I need to unburden myself and burden someone else. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's time. Yeah, I've been freaked out about the Henta virus, trying not to look it up anymore. um So any other hypochondriac people who like to Google slash chat GPT symptoms with me. We all need to turn off our phones um and get our children. You should not use. Can I can i challenge you to do something?
00:03:54
Speaker
Well, no more chat GPT. ever again. But Google is so ineffective now. Because google if I Google things, i have to Google it and then put Reddit at the end. And then I have to decide whose opinion I agree with. like No, that's that's how I get any information I've ever gotten. Probably everything I've ever said to you was from doing that.
00:04:12
Speaker
It works. Google plus Reddit? its yeahed oh yes. I mean, it's a good equation, but then I basically pick the person that says the thing that's the most comforting to me. and And then that's when you stop. Yeah, yeah. You go through, you read the scary thing, you read the scary thing, and then you read the thing that provides you with comfort.
00:04:29
Speaker
And then you close the app and move on. like Actually, there's no chance of death from this. Or permanent injury. Yeah. Or like, yeah, this happened to me and everything was fine. And then you're just like, oh, yeah. yeah This happened to me and everything was fine. That's a good one.
00:04:43
Speaker
And you kind of – you have to keep skipping over the ones that are like, this happened to me and everything in my life went wrong. And you have to keep like skipping those. Yes, yes. And then you just find the one that suits your needs. and I did a lot of that during pregnancy because I didn't have the chat to be the option yet. But I actually find that – yeah, because Google does suck. I do think – reading Reddit anecdotes is more helpful with like scary, like hypochondria stuff related to pregnancy. Yeah. Because it there is a lot of like reassuring.
00:05:14
Speaker
a oh yeah, this is very common. And yeah, Yeah, and there's a narrative voice. Like, there's, like, a story. Like, it's just, like, dry WebMD stuff. like whereas Or, yeah, or Google, it'll just say, like, call your doctor immediately. Like, no matter what you no matter what you search, it'll be likere like, you need to consult a doctor immediately.
00:05:33
Speaker
Yeah, best thing is to go in. It's like calling the nurses hotline. So useless. They're always just like, we think it's this, but really, you should go to the doctor.
Child Health Advice
00:05:41
Speaker
And it's like, why did I call you? What was the point of this? like Oh, yeah. They'll just be like, and you should come in right now.
00:05:46
Speaker
For that, you should come in. Yeah. I'm actually not trained to answer any of these questions. like Yeah, no, it never provides the comfort you think it will. I mean, in in Brooklyn, I made good friends with someone whose father is a pediatrician. So I would just text her then she would tell me.
00:06:05
Speaker
Yeah, which yeah controlled her father or did she just have enough background information? It's both like it's both. But most of it was stuff she'd picked up from her father. Of course, her father was old school.
00:06:15
Speaker
So a lot of his advice was like, They're fine. It's just mucus or whatever. you know um a Nice spanking and everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. and So I don't know.
00:06:26
Speaker
I mean, we're still like, because we still both have coughs and we're like debating if we need to go back to the doctor or not. But my my child is very active and excited and he seems okay. He just has a cough and like his nose is still. He's fine. He's fine.
00:06:40
Speaker
He's fine.
Fear of Viruses and Lack of Produce
00:06:42
Speaker
He's fine. Unless it's hinted virus. I'm going to die. But anyway, no, the symptoms are mild for a while. like I'm sure we don't have it.
00:06:51
Speaker
It doesn't, it actually does not spread as fast as COVID at all. So that's like very low risk at this point. Or so sayeth the WHO. But anyway, WHO, does it spell who?
00:07:04
Speaker
Is that right? yeah World Health Organization. Yeah. ah In my head, whenever I read it, I say who in my head. You say who like an owl? Yeah. All right. Well, it's a good way of remembering it. I never put it. I always said W-H-O, like the full. why what Who has time for that?
00:07:21
Speaker
I guess I do. Got all the time in the world to say the letters. But yeah, the it's been it's been rough on our body. There's been no produce in the middle of the country. It's actually sad. i like It's a real food desert.
00:07:37
Speaker
You know, they say in cities there's food deserts. But like in our country, there's a huge... food desert. Maybe because nobody would buy the produce. I don't know. But it's all like. Are you just going, is that along the 10? Is that the issue? Like certainly there's produce in the States that you're describing. There are, but not along the highway. Like there's no, if you're making a long journey, like you got it. You basically have no choice at one point, but to eat a subway sandwich as the most healthy option you can get.
00:08:09
Speaker
Like, Which there are vegetables in quotation.
Vegan Fast Food and Local Culture
00:08:13
Speaker
That's pretty good. Anyway, how was your drive? Did you drive through any, did you make any pit stops or like?
00:08:20
Speaker
We always stop at Taco Bell. ah Oh, okay. um Which when, I think when you're a vegan, Taco Bell isn't a problem the way it can be.
00:08:37
Speaker
Because it's beans. Because you're used to the beans. And we're used to eating beans. We're used to getting a lot of fiber. ah Yeah, we just got pop out ah Yeah, there's lettuce and tomato in the crunch wrap.
00:08:55
Speaker
And then we add jalapenos and potatoes. Your kids like jalapenos too? This is for me. They just get, they get bean and rice burritos.
00:09:06
Speaker
Okay. That sounds good. Yeah, it's great. being nice Yeah. And it's pretty much the only fast food restaurant. We could do Burger King. get they're They're one of the few fast food restaurants that still has like Impossible Burgers or Beyond Burgers. Yeah, Burger King has. Yeah.
00:09:27
Speaker
Yeah. so that's pretty much it. Taco Bell or Burger King could do a Subway. yeah Nice veggie delight. Yeah, veggie delight. Yeah, that's pretty much it, huh? um Did you go to any parks like on your trip through the United States?
00:09:47
Speaker
Yes, we did. i'm trying to remember. The most recent one we got too warm too fast. We had to get out of there. Where were we? It's all a blur now.
00:09:59
Speaker
It might have been somewhere in Oklahoma. um I just want to know about like all American encounters, like different parenting styles that you discovered. i mean, there were definitely like people smoking cigarettes, like adults smoking cigarettes at that park at a picnic table. Where was this? I watched I think it was Oklahoma, somewhere between Oklahoma and here. oh God, I can't remember.
00:10:25
Speaker
Unless it was Arkansas. But it was like a little bit, oh, and the ice cream truck played like, rap music about ice cream. Like it was like ice cream. I can't even know how to put it, but it was like, like it was like not because, you know, in in Brooklyn, there's that dreaded tune that they all play exactly the same. I guess it must be a monopoly. It's like they did did la did do or whatever of the Mr. Softy. So this was like, OK, there's like things are a little bit different. and a little bit different here. And maybe Oklahoma or Arkansas or the state that we were in before that, maybe near Memphis. Maybe that's where we were. Tennessee.
00:11:02
Speaker
Um, all American encounters. I mean, there were definitely like kids in Tennessee that seemed like they might've been carrying guns. right There were like holster situation.
Parenting Styles and Risks
00:11:18
Speaker
yeah, there, we went to like, you know, cause I wanted to see at least where Dolly Parton was from. This was like the one touristy thing I wanted to do was like go to the Dollywood area.
00:11:29
Speaker
And it was a huge mistake. might not have bothered No, it was just like lame. Like it was definitely tourist trap that I knew would be, but I thought it would be kitchen, like an amusing way, but it was more a kitchen, like a, ah like culture shock way. Depressing or like, like.
00:11:48
Speaker
Just like, like Like I've seen, I've seen like hillbilly culture in movies and stuff, you know, but then when you're full on confronted with the reality and like the Trump mega store, I think honestly it's Trump that ruined a lot of it. Like that, ah but that it's like, he's totally made like, like made money off of making them think he's in their tribe. And it's just depressing. When in reality, he is disgusted with those people. he hey Yeah, exactly. So it's just, it's it's depressing to see how much they've bought in yeah um to that. Totally.
00:12:27
Speaker
I think that's why we had to keep making jokes, like, about how, like, we are the people. Like, I don't know, like, we kept making we the people and don't tread on me jokes because we just, like, had Right. You're the real, yeah, you're the real ah middle class just Americans, right? I don't know. There was, like, this radio. We went to this one attraction. I was, like,
00:12:49
Speaker
And there was like a ah um a roller coaster that they had built in the hill that like seats one person at a time. We did not ride the roller coaster.
00:13:00
Speaker
um But there are a lot of places like that, like attractions around. We were trying to do something that didn't cost any money. So you can kind of just stop here and look in the store, you know. That's all you can do. Yeah. That's all you can do. And there was like a radio station playing on the store that must be like the southern version of my prairie home companion. But like.
00:13:21
Speaker
Eventually, my husband just was like, I can't take listening to this anymore. Like, we got to get out of here. And there were like, you know, raccoon hats and like, it's like everything you would think, you know.
00:13:33
Speaker
I mean, I definitely felt like I didn't want to highlight the fact that I was Jewish anywhere. Not going emphasize it, you know, um just kind of hide in plain sight.
00:13:48
Speaker
you weren't You weren't lighting the Shabbat candles like in McDonald's. No, I was
00:13:58
Speaker
not. I'm trying to think if there were any other like playground encounters. I mean, like there were one of those stupid spinning things that I hate. You know, those things that you can sit on this enclosed circle that spins and jump on and I hate those things.
00:14:13
Speaker
i hate those And I was letting him, Mikey, go on it because he really wanted to be like the big kids. And I was like, just hold on. And I was like monitoring. And then they were spinning pretty fast. And this girl tried to get off and was like dragged for a bit. And I like screamed pretty dramatically. She was fine.
00:14:30
Speaker
She was fine. I have anxiety. No, these things are so fun. Kids love those things. You like those? Oh, yeah i mean the kids love them. And yeah, it can be a little hairy getting on and off, but like nothing – truly bad ever happens.
00:14:46
Speaker
I'm terrified. i mean, like to me, i I like, it looks like it looked like she was getting dragged by a truck. Like it was like, looked horrible. it looked horrible. She was fine. You know, her mom just yelled at her that like, she told her to wait till it stopped to get up.
00:15:02
Speaker
But then I didn't let my kid go in there anymore. You're going to be, you're going to fit in so nicely when you return. Yeah. To be rolled into it.
00:15:13
Speaker
Does nobody want their kids taking risks over there? It's like, you know, more of a hovering, hovering parent. The hovering parent, yeah. I'm trying to be less hovering. ah oh yeah, you did say you were you were. I'm trying to be less.
00:15:28
Speaker
um I mean, I've had to be more hovering in Brooklyn because there's just so many other kids. Yeah. So it's like there's more need for intervention.
00:15:39
Speaker
Well, and your child is still so young. He's still so young. Yeah. But for a while i was really hanging back. Like if there aren't kids around, i can chill. Like not too many kids, you know, but yeah, we'll see how it goes when I get there.
00:15:56
Speaker
I mean, I did find it relaxing in some ways to be at the, the Arizona parks because of the, you know, they're not doing gentle parenting as much around there. You can, uh, I see. You can relax a bit more. Like the first time you hear yelling, it's like we've said before, little jarring. But then you can relax a bit because, you know, no one's putting on a show.
00:16:24
Speaker
and no one i mean, I still yell. or Is that going to make me stick out? I yell sometimes. I mean. Yeah. i don't know Just saying like, get like, okay. i had been at the the playground at the park near my parents' house for like three seconds when I heard a dad shout, Braylon, get over here.
00:16:45
Speaker
um which i and I think Braylon is the name of every single child, male or female in yeah suburban Phoenix. Braylon and Kaylee. Oh yeah. Braylon, Kaylee. Braylee.
00:16:59
Speaker
Liam, Jaden, Caden, you know, all those. Maidaleigh. There's always like an L-E-I-G-H, I feel like, at the end of the girl. Or like L-E-E. Hailey.
Stress of Parenting and Decision Making
00:17:09
Speaker
Harper.
00:17:11
Speaker
Harper. or Harper Lee, probably. how did I don't know. Oh, yeah. emphaizing yeah Mary Lou Harper. no there's no Mary Lou's anymore. That's now I can picture a Mary Lou.
00:17:25
Speaker
But in Airborne, you know, they're all like... Like any just like when the kid wasn't listening to him, he was just like, why aren't you listening to the words I'm saying? And then I was trying to like imagine any parent at the playground here saying that.
00:17:38
Speaker
And I'm like, no, the only one who would be saying that is me. I will be saying stuff like that. Okay. I mean, you're going you're going to help like make me. Change the tone. This is good. Yeah. We can set it. It's like he sometimes just needs clarity.
00:17:56
Speaker
I'm not, I mean, I try not to be too angry, but I want to be clear. for rent Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. But I don't know. i mean, I also am very malleable, so I might cave to the culture. Like, let's just see what happens. But sometimes I have no choice because he's freaking out, you know, so I have to take charge or he's or he's just going to be stuck somewhere.
00:18:20
Speaker
Let's say he's tired and hungry. Yeah. He doesn't want to go anywhere, but he needs to sleep and eat or he's just never going to feel better. so I have force him. it's your job to... Tell them that that's what needs to happen. Yeah.
00:18:32
Speaker
Yeah. So sometimes you got to pick them up. I mean, yeah, I think I've definitely freaked people out with like the picking him up when he's freaking out and dragging him out of places. But I don't see an alternative. Like sometimes. I've definitely freaked people out by doing that too.
00:18:50
Speaker
Yeah, but... What are you going to do They don't realize what they need in that moment. like Right. Yeah. And I do think, I think overall, like when you think long term, it does make them feel safer to have someone picking them up and saying like, this is what we're doing. Like, I know what's best for you. Like, that's.
00:19:12
Speaker
Yes. But they don't have to rely on their own navigation in that moment because they're overwhelmed. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I think you're you're doing You're doing great. And you would think the, like, the yelling nannies in New York, the ones who tell you to get up.
00:19:30
Speaker
ah Yeah. You would think, like, at least they're they're also providing some, like, alternative, like. Clarity. Yeah, yeah. when When they're communicating with the children. but then on the weekends, the parents are all, like. No, I think it's confusing when parents are trying to lead their kids and making their own choice at that age. Like, it's like, don't you think would be better if we left the playground? Which I am also guilty of this, but ah your look on your face.
00:20:00
Speaker
Oh my God. But they're like, what if we try doing, you know, and I'm like, that kid is just going to go crazy trying to figure out what you actually want here. Like, right. Yeah. Just be real with them. Yeah. Yeah. It's double message. Yeah. It's confusing.
00:20:17
Speaker
It's confusing. And coming from a family where a lot of messages were surreptitious like that, it's stressful because eventually the parent freaks out.
00:20:31
Speaker
Because they're not expressing what they really want. Right. Yeah. There's a boiling point. And then you feel responsible that you couldn't like figure out what the message was, you know?
00:20:42
Speaker
so Right. like they can The kid doesn't understand. No. Like what's being inferred. Because they're not at that level of communication yet.
00:20:54
Speaker
And so you're saying like, don't you want to do this? And if you're giving them the option of saying... No. You know, like in that right scenario. Yeah. That's why they need to. Why wouldn't they be able to say, yeah like, I don't know. Yeah. It's just, it starts a whole mind game.
00:21:09
Speaker
But we do sometimes bribe. I mean, 100% we try sometimes because we don't want to deal with the clash. Like, we like, let's go get a cookie, which is probably bad.
00:21:19
Speaker
Yeah. But you got to whisper it. Like, we're going to get home. We're going to have cookie. Woo. Like you're going to get like a secret like drug. And then the kid just leaves and all the other parents are like, wow, that kid just listened to the parent and the parent didn't offer any bribes.
00:21:37
Speaker
Yeah. I'm just that good, guys. Let's go. Yeah. Well, I mean, obviously – I'll go. Yeah. No, I have a – I feel like a boy mom specific story to share.
00:21:53
Speaker
um So there was this – eight-year-old boy at the playground yesterday. and at first I thought he was lying because it's a thing that like boys between my ah yeah like five and 12, like their favorite thing to do is lie about their age and say that they're older.
00:22:13
Speaker
so i'm sorry so anytime I ask a boy how old he is, ah I'm like, let me look at your teeth. Um, he did not want to do that. He was like, I don't want to, I'm let me look at your table.
00:22:27
Speaker
Because then I couldn't figure out like, you know, what's missing, like what's, what's coming in. And like, that can tell me and ah general range of how old they are. But after talking to him more, I think he really, i think he really was eight and he was just going on and on about how he's,
00:22:45
Speaker
a hacker uh plays roblox and his parents tried to um his parents really wanted him to stop doing the roblox so they like locked him out but then this kid said he paid his 16 year old brother to let him do it on his ipad or whatever well and It was all about like taking me like, yeah, I'm like, what are you what are you doing for work? How do you have money?
00:23:17
Speaker
Are they hiring? And then, i know, he's taking all the jobs. Allegedly. But then he, oh, and then I was like, so why aren't you in school? And he said he was suspended for running away from school. It seems like rewarding, like literally exactly what he was trying to do, which was get out of school.
00:23:40
Speaker
He was with like a nanny who was just like sitting on the bench, like talking on the phone because I wanted to walk over to the nanny and be like, what is this kid's deal? But she was not like she was talking on the phone.
00:23:52
Speaker
um And then my kid was like, I want to I want to tell you a secret. Like, I want to tell you something secret. So they like went under the playground together. and I was like, oh my God, this kid's talking about being a hacker. What is my kid about to reveal to this child? So then I like wandered back over to you know, listen in.
00:24:14
Speaker
And I heard him go, guess what show I'm in? 101 Dalmatians. And this, the kid had I don't think ever heard of 101 Dalmatians because he's,
00:24:30
Speaker
He's hacking, you know, he's a little beyond 101 Dalmatians. But it was very reassuring to be like, okay, my kid is a very sweet little innocent child. i definitely remember lying when I was five and telling people that I was... ah Sorry, it's funny to remember. don't But I would tell people that I was secretly royalty and I was just there to like learn about the commoners. Like...
00:24:59
Speaker
Just like at the park, if you met someone at the park, you would tell them this? I told in kindergarten. I mean, like other classmates, I would tell. Like, I'm a princess. And um I just, you know it's like basically whatever a five-year-old's equivalent of saying, like, this is just to keep me humble. Like, who is why I'm in school with you guys. like Wow, that really makes me not trust you at all.
00:25:22
Speaker
Oh. Because you think I actually am royalty? Yeah.
00:25:27
Speaker
Well, I stopped being able to lie after that. There was an incident where I had like a friend who was a bad influence. I think it was like first or second grade.
00:25:38
Speaker
And she got me to steal someone's donut out of their cubby. and And I came home and told my dad and just cried and cried about how bad I felt. And I asked him what my punishment and he was like, this is your punishment.
00:25:51
Speaker
Oh, nice. Yeah. That's great. And that was the end of that. Yeah. can't steal anymore. Oh, that stuff, that stuff really works. Like just ah not actually having a punishment and just being forced to live with the guilt.
00:26:08
Speaker
Yeah. Consequence. Yeah. There's nothing didn like that too in school, but it was from the principal where I like said, I said something really mean to another kid and they like went to the principal about it.
00:26:20
Speaker
And then he was like, you know, you have freedom. Like nothing, I didn't like say, i didn't say like any curse words or anything. Like he's like, you have freedom of speech. So you just have to live with what you said.
00:26:36
Speaker
But I thought that was like a really effective way to handle. Right. You have to deal with what you said. It's like that story. Actually, Madonna stole this story from like Jewish lore, but It's a man who like told a lie, like that became a rumor that came back around and was like really bad.
00:26:59
Speaker
And he went to the rabbi and was like, what do I do? And he was like, take your pillow out into the center of town and open it up and let out all the feathers. and then he And then come back to me. And so he did it and he came back and the rabbi's like, now go collect all the feathers. And he was like, I can't.
00:27:18
Speaker
And the rabbi was like, exactly. That's a good one. Some good rabbi stuff. like Yeah, yeah. Yeah. No, there's a lot of good stuff in in Judaism about like guilt and shame and like the value in guilt and shame.
00:27:34
Speaker
Oh, yeah. It's all about the guilt. But then it's sometimes it's too much guilt. like Well, that you got to find a healthy. healthy Yeah. Help me find that page someday.
00:27:45
Speaker
What's a healthy amount of guilt?
Success, Lying, and Morality
00:27:47
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, I guess I've never really done anything. Well, what am going to confess to a crime on the podcast? I can't anything that I like feel really guilty about. you told me about the lies you told when you were five, and I'm already appalled. I mean, it's it stuck with me. But I think that was the last time. Like, it's like I couldn't steal after that, and I still can't lie, which is yet another reason I can't get a job. because Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, that is the thing about lying.
00:28:16
Speaker
You have to. Like every successful person I know lied. They are. Same. No, every successful person I know, same. And they'll have full on like, I mean, maybe it's also because we're like in the LA, but it's like they'll have full on fake friendships with people. like Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally.
00:28:37
Speaker
Insane. Like I can't. yeah Keep it going for years and years and years. Just basically become a different person. Yes. Because that's what it takes. And it gets them what they want.
00:28:48
Speaker
Yeah. No, it works. But at what cost? Like, it's totally deal with the devil type stuff. Yeah. yeah But it's not the actual devil. it's just like It's just like your own morality gets so corrupted in the face of just what you want. And and like, because America is always like, live for your dreams, go for your dreams at at all costs, you know? Right. right Your own. Yeah.
00:29:12
Speaker
Because they think it's like a virtue. The success is a virtue. And it is. And you get respected and lauded. And then the more narcissistic you become, the more you get surrounded by sycophants. And then it's just this like self-fulfilling thing. And then you attract – I mean, the irony is then once you're successful, you'll attract those fake friends.
00:29:34
Speaker
And the cycle just continues. Right, right. But you don't – at that point, do you even know they're fake friends? you don't know. Yeah. Well, deep down inside, you know, but you don't access that part of yourself anymore. You're like cut off from it.
00:29:50
Speaker
Right. Right. Because this is why in order to keep going. Yeah. Yes. You have to believe that this was worth it. Throwing away reality, humanity, morality was all worth it for like basically just to be able to purchase a lot of things and, and create art. I mean, like,
00:30:09
Speaker
create art, but then what is the art at that point? like But I guess I'm maybe describing a play I should write or something. People switching places. I'm trying to figure out a two-hander to write for me and my friend. The fact that most but like these very successful people are the ones who get to create art.
00:30:29
Speaker
So it's like, what are they creating exactly? like What does that art turn into? They're making the TV show Euphoria. I haven't watched the new season, but I haven't. I've never watched any of it.
00:30:44
Speaker
Look, I love Zendaya. I think she's very talented. The vibes of that show are so dark for like maybe
Comfort in TV Shows
00:30:51
Speaker
no reason. Like there's no. I have a feeling it would very much depress me to watch that show. So I. It's dark.
00:30:59
Speaker
I can't go too deep into the. Although a sign of me actually being depressed is that I'm watching Gilmore Girls. It's like a dark sign of mine. Like if I'm ever like I'm watching Gilmore Girls, like that's when you should be like. should worried about you.
00:31:15
Speaker
It's really just because nothing goes wrong on that show. So it's just like. I mean, I could tell you about some things that go wrong on that show. Let me tell you. stuff with Steph. Wait, what is the stuff with? staff um wait what is the stuff with Steph?
00:31:32
Speaker
Who's Steph? Isn't that his name? The boy? With Rory? Jess?
00:31:41
Speaker
Jess. okay. i i thought maybe you I thought you were maybe referring to something that happened in season seven, which I disagree. No, no, no. No, Jess. Jess.
00:31:53
Speaker
um I should tune in and check out the names again. It sounds like it's time I've watched it many times. I should know. Why does he feel like a Steph to me? I mean, it rhymes with Jess.
00:32:07
Speaker
so just c sole ah Sort Well, Jess sounds short for Jessica and Steph sounds short for Stephanie. Yeah, sure. Totally. Come on. You see the logic.
00:32:18
Speaker
You pretend like you don't. Stop treading on me.
00:32:24
Speaker
No, I think I do. It's been a really long time since I've rewatched That's good sign. And I do, I wonder what I would think now. I feel like I would either really, really love it or I would be super annoyed with it. But also I've seen it so many times that I feel like I can just watch the episodes in my head whenever I want So I don't know what there would be in watching. I mean, I love the intergenerational mom stuff. Like,
00:32:52
Speaker
I love the scenes. That's all great. That's my favorite part of it. I mean, the first time I watched it, I watched it first time as an adult and during ah during lockdown.
00:33:03
Speaker
ah Well, you didn't watch it until, oh wow. twenty Nothing. My sister was obsessed because she was like, it's us. And I was like, I don't know if that's us, but maybe. Who was it? Which one was she? Which one were you? Like, that's not a show about siblings.
00:33:18
Speaker
I think she was the mom and I was the daughter. i but i mean, like, you know, she's my older sister. i mean, she always had a bit of a maternal role in my life. So, like, it makes sense that, you know, I don't know. So she's like the quirky, fast-talking.
00:33:36
Speaker
I guess. I don't know. i mean Yeah. I don't know. But I always found that show to be really annoying and grating and I was like, i can't watch this, it's too saccharine.
00:33:49
Speaker
But then during lockdown, I was like, this is exactly what I need. you just, you yeah, you reached you reach the point in your life where you where you needed it. I mean, I always thought it was really smart when it was on.
00:34:03
Speaker
i am You know, better better than your average WB show. whom See, I was into the other ones like um Dawson's Creek and Everwood and… Yeah, and know. And Everwood. those were good too.
00:34:21
Speaker
but But, you know, I was a big Seventh Heaven fan. oh my God. oh yeah. My life is Seventh Heaven. All right. Whoa. Did your mom smoke pot?
00:34:34
Speaker
I was scandalized. I was scandalized by that. ah I think it turned me against like drinking. Seventh Heaven was like dare. It like turned me against drinking and drugs and premarital sex. Like it really worked on me. And I'm very grateful for that.
00:34:52
Speaker
That might be why I hated it, because I loved all those things. I'm like, wait, these are all my favorite things. Why are you saying? loves. Yeah. I was growing up in bohemian
Anxiety and Body Acceptance
00:35:02
Speaker
Montreal. It was like, go, have sex, do drugs, live, joie de vivre. Different world. Full of clowns.
00:35:11
Speaker
French clowns. Not the best. Well, maybe the best kind. i don't know. Yeah. another Another sign of me being in a dark place is if I'm like, maybe I should take a clown class.
00:35:21
Speaker
That's when you know things are not going well. It's not a good sign. What about mime? Could you get to the point where you are looking mime? I can do a little mime. I mean, like I can i can like pull the rope, you know? Yeah, I am. I am worried about you. have one story that I could tell about our journey, which is more indicative of like me and my husband's issues, but um Everything is.
00:35:48
Speaker
Yeah, everything is. So we've been staying in hotel rooms, Hampton Inn, collecting Hilton points. And we usually get king a king bed because we all co-sleep. um and But we've been afraid to book it like until we're close to the place because we don't know if we'll make it or not or how things are going to go with the toddler in the So one place and there was nowhere else we could really go. they only had two queen beds. um
00:36:20
Speaker
So we were like, how are we going to do this? And we both started like freaking out about if our kid would fall off the bed, which like he would be fine. There's there's a rug like the beds are pretty high up, but he would be fine.
00:36:34
Speaker
Even if he just fell off, it would be fine. He'd be fine. But so we're like, first, we're like, should we build a boundary on one side of the bed? And my husband was like, we need to push the beds together.
00:36:46
Speaker
and I was like, well, why I think this works. And he's like, I think this works. And he was like, well, then what should we do? And I was like, we should both get treatment for our anxiety because this is insane yes yes yes oh man i went doing we ended up just doing both things we built a pillow barrier and for and you pushed the beds together okay because i was like pushing the beds together i'm scared he's gonna get caught in between like that's almost scarier to me you know like he's not three months old he's a giant two-year-old no this is yeah we cannot be objective about our child like oh no i should always always be there okay
00:37:24
Speaker
Yeah, we should just call you. But it sounds like you could have done, you did both. You pushed the that together and you created the barrier because it didn't matter. It was for us. It was for our anxiety. Like it had nothing to do with our child, like in the end.
00:37:40
Speaker
Yep. That's what we got to watch out for. That's my big story of the trip. was in i was on a twin bed with my younger child. A twin?
00:37:51
Speaker
Yeah. oh Yeah, but you're like half my size. I've expanded. Like, I'm ah i'm like a la like a hefty, hefty lady these days. Not in a bad way. In like a and like a powerhouse. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, can't get through me.
00:38:08
Speaker
you know, way. No, that's, that's good. That's good. I mean, what else am I going to say right now? um I don't know. It's scary to talk about. but No, I gained weight in lockdown and then just, then I got pregnant and yeah, now forget it. Like, I think it's because the extended breastfeeding, my body's just like holding on to every, maybe it's also fear. There's always like,
00:38:32
Speaker
I just get into fear brain. I'm like that the food scarcity, like my body's probably like, we got to keep the fat just in case, you know, I don't know. I truly don't know what's going on, but maybe I'll relax in LA, you know, and then we'll all just melt away. Then I won't have, I don't know. I've kind of settled into being a larger person now. It's like, not so bad.
00:38:54
Speaker
you You want to hold on to the persona. Well, you just, there's more of you So you're like, and It's like a different feeling. don't know how to explain it.
00:39:06
Speaker
But... That's true. Sometimes I feel like I'm such a slight person. I barely exist, you know? It's hard. Come on. No one even sees me because I'm practically not there.
00:39:18
Speaker
oh I got to say the plus size section in the South is killer. Oh, yeah? Like, it's like you can get anything any size. Where were you shopping? I mean, we had to charge the car.
00:39:29
Speaker
So it's like often... You're stuck at Walmart, yeah. So Walmart had like, it was like, great I was like, I can't believe, because I'm so used to it only going up to XL. And I'm like, and it's also like the sizes are different everywhere. So I'm like, will this fit or won't it? You know, like sometimes it fits.
00:39:47
Speaker
Sometimes it's too big. Like, it's like, I never know what's going happen, you know? But then I'm like, they have so, it was just, I was like, but of course they do, you know? yeah This is like normal sizes here, like But it's weird. It's weird that, yeah, people can be that size and be malnourished. It's like this bizarre American thing, like depressing.
00:40:10
Speaker
Right. Yeah. The fast food, the lack of produce, apparently. yeah Such a, such a, I mean, yeah. The lengths you have to go to, to like stay healthy, probably if you're living around there, it's like.
00:40:25
Speaker
because you get your produce at Walmart. Like it's like some places there are not other grocery stores. Like it's Walmart, you know? Walmart is the grocery store. Yeah. Or Target, like depending or like, yeah, maybe CVS. Like, I don't know, but it was, yeah. I was like, this would be, this would be a million times harder to like, to make myself do this. Yeah.
00:40:51
Speaker
No, I don't know. But you feel so bad, like physically. I don't know. Eating crap all the time. I mean, b you'll be you'll be back at last and soon enough.
00:41:03
Speaker
Thank God. Even though that stuff also is like not. So he's like, he you know, what is a greenwashing? Where it's like very healthy.
00:41:13
Speaker
And it's like actually just like palm oil or something. It's healthy. But you're yeah, you're spen and you're spending twice as much on it. tomato Yeah, you're spending a more. I mean, yeah, the prices have definitely shot up now that we're in Sedona.
00:41:30
Speaker
Well, Sedona, yeah, Sedona is like a fancy place. Like everything's going to be expensive there. We had a waiter this morning that I was like, this would not have happened in Brooklyn. What? He was like.
00:41:42
Speaker
Have a great day catching butterflies and vortexes, you know? Oh who knows i did not The people who go to Sedona, that's what they're looking for. it's so nice. I love it.
Cultural Contrasts: Sedona vs. Brooklyn
00:41:54
Speaker
i That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. I love it.
00:41:59
Speaker
I love it so much. i'm like, yes, life should just be looking for butterflies and vortexes. Like that sounds incredible. Yeah, definitely had enough of the like, you want a butterfly? I'll show you a butterfly. you know, like spit in your face, Brooklyn attitude. You're kind of so over it, dude.
00:42:19
Speaker
I don't know. that I mean, that guy obviously didn't really exist that I just imitated. You talked about it. Did you say spitting on butterflies? No, they'd just be like a butterfly. Like they'd just be like, here's a butterfly and punch you in the face or whatever.
00:42:35
Speaker
don't You have to do a butterfly stitch after this one or But that's, you know, that's some guy from the 1940s. Nobody actually talked like that in Brooklyn. Well, the accent, the accent's dying out, right? Isn't that like a thing that.
00:42:50
Speaker
Oh, like the true. The true New York accent. Yeah, I mean, the real brook Brooklyn accent is like, what is her name in Do the Right Thing? you see that movie? I've seen it. It's been a few years.
00:43:02
Speaker
Okay, well that what is her name? She's got a very distinct accent and I think it's the original Brooklyn accent. Maybe I'll i'll look it up. Hold on. Yeah, it's definitely dying out.
00:43:13
Speaker
My grandparents are holding on. Oh, really? its still that thick New York. yeah Yeah, they're from they're both from New York.
00:43:24
Speaker
And despite being in Arizona for like, what, 40 to 50 years now. They still. Rosie Perez. Oh, yeah. OK. Yes. Yeah.
00:43:35
Speaker
I think that's like the original Brooklyn accent when she hasn't do the right thing. um So your grandparents have that accent. That's so cool. Yeah. Yeah. They they have held on and they always talk about how great it was being in New York.
00:43:49
Speaker
Really? Yeah. Yeah. What do they say about it? You know, like, but you know, my grandma talks about living on the Upper East Side and going to all the museums and like ah just her mother taking her to all the museums instead of going to like kindergarten or whatever, which obviously I ah can appreciate.
00:44:10
Speaker
So, okay. So she was in Manhattan. That's a little different. Yeah, she was in Manhattan and he was in Yonkers. Okay. Yonkers. Yonkers. Yonkers.
00:44:20
Speaker
Yeah. yeah then i well i went And then I went there. we went there in 2022. And I went to like the address, like where my grandpa used to live. And he when I told him about it, he was like, no, he's like, do not. know then Don't go back. What are you doing there? Get out. was like, oh, I'm just trying to explore my ancestry. In Yonkers.
00:44:50
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. We we we we didn't laugh Was he scared you'd get like a street thug would come up to you or something? don't know what he thought. I think he's just like, oh, I don't even know. but Probably been a while since he's been there. So I don't even know what he was imagining.
00:45:07
Speaker
Right, what did Yonkers even look like back then? I mean, all I knew about Yonkers, well, when I was, the two associations I have is, one is when I was really little, I saw the movie Lost in Yonkers, and I remember it freaking me out. That's all I remember about a great play.
00:45:23
Speaker
Oh, it is? There's a movie. I mean, I saw the movie. Yeah, but it wasn't, I mean, you would think you would, you of all people would have seen the play. why But it was American. Neil Simon, right? Yeah.
00:45:36
Speaker
Oh, was it? Oh, see, I didn't even know that. yeah I just remember it freaking me out. and then And then also I know that in New York, everyone's like tax wise, they're like, don't set foot in Yonkers. You're going to owe a million dollars in taxes.
00:45:51
Speaker
Don't work in Yonkers. People are always freaking out about taxes. Yeah. Westchester, the taxes in Westchester. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know what that's about, but...
Family History in New York
00:46:03
Speaker
Yeah, we drove through Yonkers. I mean, it just looked like like houses. It kind of looked like Staten Island a little bit. Yeah, yeah. i mean it's But a little nicer, honestly. like But maybe we're in the nice part of Yonkers.
00:46:16
Speaker
I don't know. i Yeah, I would not have any idea. we didn't We didn't venture very far. But it was... My parents... okay
00:46:27
Speaker
yeah My parents lived in New York in the 70s. They were like up near Columbia. So. Upper, Upper West. Yeah, like it's up there. It's up there. And my mom, yeah, definitely still, like when she would come to visit, she'd be like, don't leave your stroller at the playground unattended. that's why she, right. That's why she was so freaked out about you moving to New York.
00:46:52
Speaker
Probably, partially, yeah. And that it's so expensive. I mean, and it is. um but Yeah, i mean, we didn't see all their friends live on the Upper West Side, so we didn't see any of them.
00:47:08
Speaker
We were too far away. I know. Like, deep and flat bush. It's like two hours. It's like having friends in the OC or whatever. You're never going to see them. I mean, do you think that that's why? Like, do you think if you were rich and you were living in Fort Greene or Cobble Hill or whatever that you would have stayed?
00:47:31
Speaker
Well, first of all, it would only be Fort Greene. Never come along. Okay. Wow. Because you want to go to, what's that place called? Space Club? Yeah, right. Right. If I had, like, when I first moved there, like, we'll get the Space Club membership. I'll go to all the classes. I mean, my best friends would have all been nannies. That's for sure. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
00:47:53
Speaker
I mean, if we were really rich, i don't know. I mean, I'm sure New York would have felt different. Like I would have had a different impression of what Brooklyn was, what New York was like.
00:48:05
Speaker
You know, i mean. i liked our neighborhood. I mean, I liked that it was genuinely felt middle class, like and I like that it was like all different types of cultures and stuff.
00:48:19
Speaker
um I mean, Fort Greene just had a lot of convenience and there's just something about the vibe over there. It's not just that people are rich because there are a lot of rich neighborhoods. a vibe where it's just like her nicer and so people are nicer because they have fewer problems.
00:48:32
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's, But no, I guess it – but I also found out there's, like, a lot of people from L.A. that live in Fort Greene. So I think I just missed the vibe of L.A. You just missed L.A. Yeah. You just need to get back to L.A. Yeah. I was like, what's most similar to L.A. in Brooklyn? It's Fort Greene. Like, you know. Or at least Los Feliz specifically. People sitting – yeah. People sitting in the park.
00:48:57
Speaker
um Yeah. Chilling. There's, like, there's an art school there. So there's, like, artsy kids, you know, which I love. Yeah. And I like that it's like walkable to downtown Brooklyn if you need stuff, you know, and then but then you can live in like kind of a quieter area. There's a lot of cool things about it. Yeah.
00:49:16
Speaker
Which is very, lo he very Los Feliz to be like central, but quiet. Central, but chill. And your new apartment is it's very quiet. That one's going to be quiet. Yeah, it's quiet over there.
00:49:30
Speaker
We'll be very close to you. I'm saying this as a bunch of landscaping is happening next door. You know, people in L.A., Love to be human. And I don't know if people will be able to hear it when they're, can you hear it?
00:49:43
Speaker
It's getting loud. can't hear it. can't hear it. I forgot that Wednesday is the, the day that this happens. that Something we should put in mind when we pick out our podcasting in person day.
00:49:58
Speaker
Oh yeah. Which we'll do off, off camera. off but Yeah, we'll do that in the, The after the pod episode. i don't think I don't think people, you can pay more to find out to to listen to Minutia.
00:50:11
Speaker
yeah Which day we're going to podcast. Pay more to listen to our scheduling conflicts. I mean, don't people want to feel like they're hanging out with us? um Okay. I'm trying to think if if there were any other playground stories.
Observations at Walmart and Sam's Club
00:50:27
Speaker
It's honestly, it's been a lot of playing in Walmarts because we have to charge. Like, so we just play with toys and then don't buy them pretty much. And how how do how do the employees of Walmart interact with your child slash the other customers?
00:50:45
Speaker
There's been no interaction with employees. They do not care at all. um They seem overworked and underpaid, which makes 100% sense. Yeah. Sometimes I sense tension between employees, but it has nothing to do with Oh, really?
00:51:01
Speaker
Yeah, I definitely – like, no, no, more just like he's not doing it the way said. They said we're supposed to do it. You know, like how there's always like that employee that's like not the manager but is like trying to keep the rules going, you know, that kind of thing. Yeah, yeah.
00:51:19
Speaker
Yeah, I noticed something like that. But no one seems to care. The other customers just get annoyed if we're in the way because they're like doing their big Walmart shop. Their shop, yeah. Yeah.
00:51:31
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. And you guys are just having fun on your way back to l a Well, you will never have to be around these people ever again. That's right. We'll never have to see them again. i mean, we were at a Sam's Club and we weren't Sam's Club members. So that was a bit risque.
00:51:48
Speaker
Oh, you're allowed inside? You can walk in. you just can't buy anything. like Okay. Okay. Well, anything, that's a great deal. You can just hang out. You can just hang out and you're not allowed. We even tried to get like the pizza or the hot dogs or whatever, and they were like, you're not allowed to get anything.
00:52:08
Speaker
These exclusive hot dogs. Exclusive feud. It cost 49 cents. forty nine cents We tested out some great lawn furniture um at the Sam's Club. And a woman, I thought this woman was judging us for testing it out.
00:52:28
Speaker
But then 10 minutes later, I saw her sitting in the lawn furniture. So I think she was really just like, that looks so comfortable. oh Maybe she was just waiting like for her turn. Yeah, she's waiting her turn. She like comes there to sit in the lawn furniture and take business calls or whatever.
00:52:43
Speaker
Right, yeah. Maybe she just does that every day and then you guys showed up. Oh, yeah. We stole her office. It was great lawn furniture. I was like, if if I had a lawn and $3,000 to spend.
00:52:55
Speaker
Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, I'm dying to get some patio furniture. Oh, it's so good. There was like the the couch that swings, you know, and like a table with like a stone top and basket around like supporting it. It was like perfect. Yeah.
00:53:10
Speaker
It was just so, it was awesome. But yeah, we're not to have a lawn. Or we'll have, there's like a patch of grass that maybe they'll let us use. We'll see. There is a patch of grass
New Apartment Plans
00:53:21
Speaker
there? There's a patch of grass. Well, it might not be grass anymore. It might just be dirt.
00:53:27
Speaker
but I don't remember seeing a patch of grass when I checked There's a patch of land. It's very small. It might be like a meter squared or something. Like it's very, very small.
00:53:40
Speaker
There's definitely some concrete. There's a parking lot. There's a parking lot. going to have two spots. We don't need both of them. So if we have guests, they can park in the spot, I guess.
00:53:52
Speaker
So that's cool. Maybe you can turn you can turn the other spot into a yard of sorts, a garden. Maybe. I mean, it's ours. We tried to give it back. We were like, will you lower the rent and we just have one spot? And he was like, no, you have to take it.
00:54:09
Speaker
So. Yeah, I'll just put a little slide there. Can slide right into where the other cars are pulling out. Yeah, yeah, yeah just take some risks, you know, i'm trying that to helicopter parent.
00:54:24
Speaker
But yeah, there's there's that. But that's it. There's no other. outdoor space there. We'd have to sneak into the studio. Well, my, my backyard will be your backyard. So yeah, we'll be coming over. need to furnish my backyard.
00:54:37
Speaker
We need to furnish your backyard. I'm going to, I'm going to look, I'm going to keep my ear to the ground for some, now that I know that you're looking for. pay look it look Can you look at like Facebook marketplace or whatever? The buy nothing. yeah well Yeah. Yeah. I think we want some free stuff. but Yeah. Also like a little, I want like a little playground.
00:54:55
Speaker
Oh yeah. We should definitely do that. We'll find that. Yeah. I mean, i what I really want to do, they're like a block away. These people have this huge playground in their front yard that literally no one has ever been on.
00:55:10
Speaker
Like, I know their kids are older. You know what I'm talking about? Is that the one that's completely that you can just hear it? No, no, no. Not that. That one too. But there's the one that's completely exposed. There's just like a little fence around the yard. Yeah.
00:55:25
Speaker
Oh, I don't know that one. Okay. I'll have to see it and You want to ask if we can go play? I just want to leave a note that says, like, you don't use this. Can I have it? that's Right.
00:55:39
Speaker
Because we could put that in our backyard and then the kids would go create. We could have all the kids in the neighborhood come play on it because they just have this playground that my younger child just sees and is like, oh, there's a playground. And he like wants to go on it. And I'm like, no, that's their private playground that no child has ever been on, at least not in the past like six years.
00:55:59
Speaker
Well, I mean, Nydia says if she wins for mayor, she'll let us- She will turn this front yard into the- Yeah, yeah. The public school playground is right around the corner.
00:56:10
Speaker
I mean, you might have to vote for her. We'll see. I might have. I mean, the the fact that all the TV writers love her so much makes me not want to vote for her.
00:56:22
Speaker
i understand that. I still I still will.
L.A.'s Mayoral Race and Perceptions
00:56:26
Speaker
Okay, good. Yeah. Well, what other option do we have? I mean, it's just, it's Karen Bass and that guy from the Hills. is What the hell?
00:56:34
Speaker
What the hell, dog? He's like, no, a friend just asked me like from, from Arizona. He was like, oh, so like Spencer Pratt's going to be mayor, right? Like he's in first. And I was like, no, what no, no. He's definitely hired a lot of people online to make it seem that way. I mean,
00:56:52
Speaker
There are these like commenter bots all over TikTok. That's a win. 500 likes. He's really trying to like go viral, right? like He's trying to make it seem, yeah. And I'm sure, I really think there's mega money because he's definitely all about like, we'll round up all the crazy people and put them in facilities or whatever. You know, like it's like, it's just very mega coded to me. ah Right. He's trying to appeal to, yeah, a certain type of Like there's the other kind of TV writer who's just like, there are many homeless people. Yeah. Or like they they don't, they wouldn't say they're Republican, but they basically are. Not out loud. Yeah. Yeah. yeah But they. send
00:57:34
Speaker
Yeah. They would like, they're the people who are like, ah are afraid to come to Los Feliz. They're afraid to come to Los Who be afraid to come Los Feliz? No, there are people on the West side who think that Los Feliz is a very scary place. Santa Monica horrible now. Like it's way scarier to go to Santa Monica than be in Los Feliz. Or maybe, maybe it's not. Maybe that's my own bias.
00:57:57
Speaker
But I i mean. about them Well, a lot of people that my husband worked with was like, why are you going back to LA? Like, isn't it horrible there? Like. I've heard it's just – they just hear all these horrible things about it. Yeah, i've actually I've heard that, yeah, on a podcast, someone in New York um talking about, like, moving to l L.A. And he's like, no, everything's bad there. I'm like, what are you talking about? Like, we walk around. They're just beautiful, idyllic, Mr. Rogers' neighborhood. i just fine yeah
00:58:29
Speaker
It's crazy. They've never been there. They've literally never set foot. Yeah, yeah. well It's all just rumors that they believe, like –
00:58:38
Speaker
I mean, at least I know that I didn't love being in Tennessee. Right. You can admit. Yeah. Yeah. yeah you great I mean, the cities are always fine, you know, like are not as bad.
Cultural Identity and Historical Context
00:58:50
Speaker
D.C. freaked me out. Washington, D.C. had a dark vibe. But that makes sense. I mean. I know. I thought that, too, even i haven't been there since I was I was 14 when I went to D.C. Yeah. And I.
00:59:07
Speaker
I got some sinister vibes. No, in general, there's just sinister vibes there. I mean, it's slavery. It's nobody talking about that slavery happened. Like, it's just like, that that's my opinion. I mean, it's just America's dark secrets under the rug and the creepy monuments. And it's just, it's this dark feeling.
00:59:26
Speaker
It's a dark feeling. i also got freaked out in um New Mexico a little bit of like how intense the appropriation of culture is from native Americans, like that white people are proudly like, oh, like what?
00:59:42
Speaker
Mexico. Just everything about it is just like, yeah, the I don't even know. Like, I can't even think of specifics. It's just that, like, the culture of the place stole, like, basically just the aesthetic of natives. Yeah. of native After like killing all the, whatever happened. White people are so desperate to have a culture, which I can understand why they, why they would be. Cause it's like.
01:00:11
Speaker
I mean, it made me think of the Greeks and the Romans kind of like how the, how the Romans just like stole the Greek, all the stories and stuff after like defeating them all. I mean, it's not exactly the same at at all, but.
01:00:24
Speaker
But people have been doing this for a long time. Yeah. They do. And i find it. Strange. I find it strange. not just like Not just that it's sad and bad, but it's also weird to me. Right, right.
01:00:41
Speaker
It's weird that you're like, i have a menacing feeling towards this culture, but also I i want to wear that fashion. like I want those clothes. Yeah.
01:00:53
Speaker
Or I want to, I don't know, I want to eat the type of food they're eating, but also like burn their house down. in regard Yeah. One thing I've noticed in Arizona is that, and I, I lived there for a long time, so I know it's not real. People are starting to like affect these fake Southern accents.
01:01:15
Speaker
um Like people, people I know, and also just strangers, people, not and Not all of them. no no one who would be listening to this. So if you're listening to this and you live in Arizona, I'm not talking about you. Okay. they' just like They're trying to be like, we're rural. Like, where're like we're Arizona. like And I'm like, no one has, like, you do not have Southern accents. No one here has a genuine anyone Southern accent. Everyone is from somewhere else.
01:01:44
Speaker
ah And even the ones who aren't, it's like, it's still fake. You know they're trying to like culturally unify. It's like, don't tread on us.
01:01:56
Speaker
Oh, you were just looking for another opportunity to bring that up. I mean, I do look as someone who for better or for worse, when I'm traveling through an area,
01:02:07
Speaker
the accent rubs off on me. And it's bad. It's disrespectful. Like when I was in Scotland, I couldn't stop doing a Scottish accent because it's like, it's everywhere. like It gets under your skin. It's natural to pick. Yeah. You start to talk more like the people you're surrounding with.
01:02:23
Speaker
Well, there's something with like the weather or something that like, it just, it just suits the environment, the accent. Like it just, like when you're in Tennessee, just so, that well ah you know, just like sound more like that. Like,
01:02:37
Speaker
I don't know. but But that might just be like a wacky, stupid thing that I do. But um but then, yeah, with Arizona, I don't I mean, I wonder if it's yeah, it's this this polarizing culture is polarizing in America. So it's like trying to pick a side with their dialect.
01:02:56
Speaker
Right. they're trying to say something like we're not like the liberal elites. It's a statement. Yeah. They're trying to make the way they talk a political statement, which coming from a place that is like that, I hate that.
01:03:09
Speaker
I hated that about Montreal. That was like my number one thing I hated about Montreal. It was the second you open your mouth, it's a political statement. Like, are you French? Are you English? Yeah. Yeah. That's what are you?
01:03:20
Speaker
Oh my God. I hated it. I was like, we're just people. Can we just talk like, who cares? Who cares? It's stressful, you know? but um But then again, I mean, that's still, yeah, at least at least it's just when I talk, like, you know, there's nothing visually necessarily that will give me away.
01:03:40
Speaker
i can hide in plain sight with my white privilege. That's true. Yeah. As long as I don't say anything, which is often, like, at certain points I sent my husband in to, like, get the snacks because I was like, I can't, like,
01:03:54
Speaker
I don't want be in there. just don't want to be in there. can't possibly deal with these people anymore. I can't. The amount of truckers in that building, I'm not going in there. Like, just not going in. Yeah. that's ah And your husband can just blend in anywhere.
01:04:08
Speaker
He code switches, like, so naturally. When someone's from the South, like, i mean, because he talks to his own dad that way. It freaks me out. i dont Right, because you know you know what's lurking.
01:04:24
Speaker
Well, it's hard to see someone you know so well be so fake because it's like it's uncomfortable. Yeah, we were talking about fake. Like people being fake.
01:04:36
Speaker
Yeah, that is what he's doing. It's um well, so whenever people are being fake, it's uncomfortable. Like whether, you know, you can sense it, right?
01:04:48
Speaker
and Probably like even with people I don't know. If there's something it's it's there's something that is stressful about experiencing that, because you can feel the tension between who they really are and who they're portraying. Totally.
01:05:02
Speaker
And it's like, and then you also, they kind of trap you into also having to be fake, because you have to like meet them at their level. Yeah, you have to provide reassurance by going along with Yes, it's really stressful.
01:05:18
Speaker
I mean, and in that sense, Brooklyn was good because you could just be just your horrible true self and no one will care. Yeah, yeah. I feel like that's that is harder to do here. But if I have you doing it along with me, together we can be horrible.
01:05:36
Speaker
We can be horrible together and everyone will talk about how horrible we are. I can't wait. The next podcast episode... You know, you'll
Future of Podcasting Setup
01:05:47
Speaker
be.
01:05:47
Speaker
Oh yeah, we'll be together. No more internet. So everyone get excited. Things are heating up around here. Things are changing.