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Humpday HaHa's
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Join Michael & Britney tonight as they focus on family comedy and hope that their stories of situations survived, for better or worse, are helpful for you this Thanksgiving. And, if we all click our heels together 3 times and say, "Gimme that Glick," The Godfather may even actually grace us with his presence!
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Transcript
Intro Brainstorming
00:00:01
Speaker
Okay, what we need, Rhett, is some kind of an intro for our Wednesday night show, Hump Day Ha Ha's. What would you do for an intro?
00:00:16
Speaker
Hump Day Ha Ha's? I feel like...
00:00:23
Speaker
i don't know. What would you say to intro the show? What would you say to intro the show?
00:00:30
Speaker
Why are you putting me on the spot while you're recording me too, you motherfucker? yeah notice recording Just do it. i Tell me the intro of the show. We need an intro for the show, Britt.
00:00:41
Speaker
And go.
00:00:44
Speaker
ah Welcome, everybody.
00:00:50
Speaker
can't do this with just you. Welcome, everybody, to what? ah Welcome, everybody, to Hump Day Ha Ha's. We're here for some laughter and fun times and chillax.
00:01:05
Speaker
Hope everybody's having a great night. Here with Michael and we got Brittany. Let's go. Let's have some fun with some comedy. Boom. I think that might work.
00:01:19
Speaker
I should have put you... I should have put you on single screen when I did that, Brett. You know what? i I knew it was a one-off, maybe two or three episodes. thought we'd have something but new by now.
00:01:30
Speaker
But it grows on me every time I see it. Because I see you. What would be your intro? And then you just look like you froze. You like a hand you I screen. That's why you were like, okay, grab this, dummy, or I'm going kill you. You're
Show Content and Guest Introduction
00:01:45
Speaker
like, huh?
00:01:45
Speaker
and i'm like hello are you what are we going talk about we're going to talk about funny stories about our families
00:02:05
Speaker
and we got a special guest tonight what are we goingnna talk about right we're gonna talk about funny stories about our family ni Or just family in general. It's going to be a family-focused night.
00:02:18
Speaker
Disclaimer, watchers, disclaimer. This is not a family show. Put the kids to bed and put them in a room. Send them out to the car to play.
00:02:29
Speaker
Lock the door. This is not for children. But we're going talk about families. Not necessarily ours in general. I got at least one, maybe two family stories I would love to tell. ah One of them I do on stage. Maybe I'll do other one.
00:02:41
Speaker
But um yeah, we're here to just talk about some comedy and stuff. want to say, what up, Wally? Zanfios in the house. What up, man? We're going to see Zanfios.
00:02:54
Speaker
We're a little bit late. And there's our good friend Fidel running his island nation. i mean And we've got a special guest coming up shortly.
00:03:10
Speaker
Yeah, thanks everybody for stopping in. We've special guest popping up shortly. I think it looks like he's ready. He's going to come in and say, I was born ready. that's That's his style, but I just did what we call in the business, beating him to the punch.
00:03:24
Speaker
Without further ado, everybody, put your hands together for our buddy, our pal, our brother. the glick what's up godfather glick what's happening up the ready and i'm not ready so i wanted to ah shout out to the uh why didn't this thing work am i just retarded benji probably yep we're gonna go with i'm retarded now it's you
00:03:58
Speaker
it's That's the first time I've listened to the the intro in its entirety.
Reflecting on Family and Humor
00:04:04
Speaker
Leave it That's a big no. Don't, don't, don't, don't, um that that'll be never cringy. um Don't mess with it. Leave it a alone. story That's right.
00:04:20
Speaker
The only story not appropriate for killing it. The lazy Jedi. What's up, brother? Good to see you. Killing it. ah You guys are killing me on Saturday saturday night. just wanted to say that. I really enjoyed the show.
00:04:31
Speaker
You guys are funny. Hey, you're talking to us, not to her. like Let Kaylee be. Kaylee. Kaylee. That show is funny, too. Hey, Kalabingo. It's our show. You got to tell you break for now.
00:04:46
Speaker
There's a Sasquatch on the panel. That's right. Captain Squatch. Captain on the ship. More like ass squash. that me And I wanted to bring you on because I wanted to hear it from my face, from my mouth, and you see my face.
00:05:01
Speaker
I'm thankful on Sensco Network. Happy Thanksgiving, guys. It's little early, but happy Thanksgiving. I'm thankful to be here. at Thanks, Lee. Thanks, Britt, for being my co-host. I'm thankful for you, Britt. Watchers, listeners, I'm thankful for you. Thank you very much.
00:05:16
Speaker
Without you guys hanging out, I couldn't do this unpaid job. I'd have to go work another job. And nobody wants to get their hamburger for me, all right? So thanks for watching. Appreciate you. was no was nothing With no crowd, there's no sitting around ah goofing off and having a good time and still not getting paid for it here.
00:05:34
Speaker
But it'll come someday. Thank you, Miss Jersey. Jersey. That means MoDog's about to come in. Now that you're here, you send a text to MoDog, have them pop in.
00:05:46
Speaker
i In honor of MoDog, I almost wore, i have a t-shirt. like I watched Saturday Night's Replay and I loved it, man. I was laughing out loud and I don't usually do that. I watched the entire fucking six hours too, by the way. I'm not bullshitting. I loved it. I had a good time watching.
00:06:02
Speaker
i wish I was there. Oh, man, he's coming. That stinks. I almost wore my t-shirt that says... There he ah go I almost wore my t-shirt that says paddle faster. I hear banjos. You guys are talking about it. And it wasn't Warren Beatty, you morons. It was Ned Beatty.
00:06:20
Speaker
Warren Beatty is one with the legendary hog that fucked all the girls in Hollywood. He was the handsome one. Ned Beatty is the one you guys were talking about. You kept saying Warren Beatty. Eric Rata from Saturday Night Show. That's me.
00:06:31
Speaker
Here's the facts on film. Why? got a Friday night movie show right here called Michael. we Movie night with Michael and Fred.
00:06:43
Speaker
Dicker than thieves. Happy Thanksgiving to all of you guys. Jedi, a Modog, Jersey, Remy, cheers to you. Good to see you. Thanks for popping in.
00:06:56
Speaker
going to tell some moms stories about family.
00:07:01
Speaker
Most importantly, I'm grateful for me. I'm sure. work no hatein't michael i want thought i want I want to tell you something. a little um I was wrong when I said Warren Beatty. Sometimes I do that just to see.
00:07:20
Speaker
it's like It's like a little... ah like um What are those calls?
00:07:25
Speaker
People will, people will, no, seriously. I believe they call them a sprax. Sprax is what I call them. Like on TikTok, you see it all the time. Like if you watch this video all the way through, tell me what color my shirt is or whatever. And then at the end of the video, they, they change their, their, their shirt. So that like, you're like, well, the shirt's white.
00:07:47
Speaker
No, they changed it at the end of the video and it's blue or whatever. Sometimes I do that. But I do think I honestly made a mistake on that Warren Beatty thing. But I do like to throw in a little stupid shit out there just to see who's paying attention.
00:07:59
Speaker
Obviously, nobody on the panel. but is but I was watching it going, nobody's called it nobody catching this. Nobody's catching this. That's why I've got the movie show.
00:08:10
Speaker
I had a lot of fun watching that stuff. gi president Jedi was killing it. I was howling. Which I was like, okay, I got to go. Literally seconds later, boom. Lazy Shaman's here, everybody. yeah He goes, what the fuck? Where's Jedi? Again, I've got a new theory, Glick.
00:08:30
Speaker
It's like the Batman thing, right? Jedi's Jedi. jedi Shaman's Bruce Wayne.
00:08:38
Speaker
No, wait. Shaman's Batman. yeah Because he's you don't see him behind the mask. And Jedi's Bruce Wayne. so you're saying You never see them in the same place twice. that's friday nights And here's what I think they do on a Friday nights. I've got a theory.
00:08:51
Speaker
Follow me here. we're We're networked like sister sister networks, right? we We promote each other. We love each other. So it's a family story about our our uglier sister, the Lazy and Shaman show, okay? Little special needs. I say that with love, Lazy. say that with love.
00:09:09
Speaker
He pre-records With like a voice modulator, all the responses from Shaman. And then just has like a wacky good soundboard where he can say this, he can say that, and just plug Shaman stuff in there.
00:09:23
Speaker
He's just got a hundred thousand years of planning, just like Bruce Wayne to be Batman. Years of planning to set this two-person show up.
00:09:36
Speaker
I'm going cut you off right there. Lizzie Jedi. Jedi is not that sure. Because you know I'm right. Jedi's not that smart. Yeah, Lazy Jedi.
00:09:46
Speaker
America's favorite Make-A-Wish kid. Yeah. Right back at you, Moe Dog. Love you, brother. Appreciate you. i mean ga but yeah mode who to get if you were If you heard the first time, dude, you guys had me howling Saturday night. I was laughing my ass off. I watched the replay.
00:10:01
Speaker
I couldn't be on the show. it was date night for me and wifey. I drove her out to, ah no, actually she drove to Cleveland. We got some ah pie in Cleveland. Well, pizza pie. just had a little time. For some reason. last time So she's back.
00:10:20
Speaker
For some reason, when these pop out of my ears, it like turns off the camera and everything. Fuck these things. Tape them to my head or something. like that.
00:10:32
Speaker
like that
00:10:35
Speaker
i even know what like you lowers every saturday i think it was like so it's like you lowers every saturday and a place like thats i have that effect on people i speculat op in but let's get to it so uh we're gonna talk tell us i'm gonna tell a family story don't know how you guys want approach your deal you want to talk about a family film like a family of comedy or whatever that revolves around family families on tv like the conners or whatever the Pritchett straight from whatever that show is called or Modern Family.
00:11:04
Speaker
There's tons and tons of sitcoms. Anyway, I'm going to tell a real family story. It's a quick one. and It's going to tell you a lot about me and why i call myself the professional idiot.
Glick's Comedic Stories
00:11:16
Speaker
So... I'm just going to make it really concise. My mom's got health problems. Okay. I'm a primary caretaker. That's right. Lose sleep over that RNs and any other actual healthcare care person that's out there. I am a primary caretaker. All those years in school and somebody like you is a PC.
00:11:36
Speaker
That's right. You're a lion. I do everything I can for. We have a good time. Even with written all her bitch in the moment. and I know Saturday, Saturday, she was on a rag, I think, something. She was really spicy.
00:11:48
Speaker
brett you were You weren't Britt like you are with me. We have our guests who usually pretty nice most of the time. You're a goddamn fucking enforcer. I'm telling you right now, we got the godfather, the capo, and the street-level thug. She will bust the kneecap with our second thought. She's a little gremlin on Saturday night.
00:12:09
Speaker
yes No shit, man. I was laughing out loud so many times. But... um I'm a primary caretaker. So she's got problems with like ah wanting to eat things like that because it makes her sick every time she just gets sick.
00:12:25
Speaker
This is again, I'm not going to specifics, but she she's got some problems. She has pain issues, stuff like that helps her makes it hard for her to sleep. So I get the right idea. Okay.
00:12:38
Speaker
Well, I can't sleep. So I get insomnia once in a while. Naturally, not always substance induced insomnia. Just so you know, I get natural insomnia sometimes too. And, uh, I'll take 75 milligram edible and then double it. So I'll take two 75, 150 milligrams to go to sleep for a good six to seven hours sleep. Okay.
00:13:00
Speaker
So I thought that's what I'll do for her. But, She's never smoked. She's no experience with this stuff. She's been a teetotaler her entire life for real. Not a drinker. this Oh, yeah. One of the many reasons I don't believe in the almighty, and I'm not disparaging anybody's beliefs, just my personal, one of many personal beliefs.
00:13:17
Speaker
I'm not disparaging anyone's beliefs. ah She won the genetic lottery. Non-alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver. Drank in my entire life. I've been to drink two times until that happened.
00:13:29
Speaker
They started going with me around to my live stuff. I started encouraging him. You already got the cirrhosis. I have a little of the fun that came getting it. Start having some drinks and enjoying yourself. He had a 21-year-old birthday party at one of my bar shows.
00:13:43
Speaker
um The whole bar, she stole my thunder that night at a 21-year-old. She was a young girl. She was giving her all sorts of drunk-ass old lady life advice. It was hilarious.
00:13:54
Speaker
So here's our bright idea. She's never done it before. i'll cut it half. So it's about, about you know, we'll just call it 40, 37 and a half milligrams. I gave it to her, and I said, listen, I'm going to if if Wait an hour, hour and a half.
00:14:08
Speaker
If you don't feel anything, you still feel rough, eat the other half of this. She goes, what is it? I said, it's um it's a medicine and a chocolate that I think might help you out. It's over the counter. or Don't worry about it. I didn't have to go to the pharmacy. It's fine.
00:14:20
Speaker
design So my intentions were honorable and sincere. I wanted to help her out. Maybe she'd get a little hungry, have a bite, and then knock out in her chair, maybe on her couch, go to her bed, lie down. I was hoping for the best.
00:14:34
Speaker
this is by the way a non-embellished 100 true account of events i'm not adding any uh as we call it this is exactly what happened and i made my mom tell this story several times at my shows she's my closer when she's there and i can get her to go up and tell this story so i give her half of this day and i said good least hour and a half then take the other half if you don't feel the thing you're still feeling rough i'll be back in four hours She has no access to any more of them. So i'm not worried about what wild these aren't helping at all. I'm just starting eating the whole bag because she's also a candy junkie.
00:15:10
Speaker
Well, it's candy ass medicine. sin How can this be a problem? You know, I'm not letting that happen. So I have one half left of that. yeah So ah it was like leaving it in front of a child. letting that happen. At least little bit professional idiot but not apro professional criminal that's for sure what's up a man along thanks for popping in appreciate you over the counter quit asking questions jedi on point again tonight so i leave i said i'll be back in four hours and i hit four hours i mean on the nut i pulled in walked in the door said mom how you feeling she comes stumbling into the kitchen oh my god
00:15:50
Speaker
Do you need the money that bad? Did you try to kill me? Are you trying to get your inheritance? What did you give me? What did you do to me? What's the matter? She said, I've been sweating and ah d woozy. i can't see. I don't know what's wrong with me. What did you do to me? What did you do to She said, after after i left, about a half an hour after I left, this all true, it's my mom.
00:16:11
Speaker
You got to hear her doing her voice though. So she said, she says a half an hour after you left, I started sweating so bad. I took off all my clothes. I just laid in my bed with the fan on over above me. She never plays the puts the fan on. And she's never worn.
00:16:27
Speaker
Ever. She wears a sweater in August. So, she's saying all this stuff. She's sweating there. She said, i barely made it to the bathroom. I thought I was going sick, but I wasn't sick. I just don't know what's going on. i had a rag on my head everything else. What did you give what did you give me?
00:16:43
Speaker
She said she thought she was going to die. literally thought she going to die and she said i thought about calling an ambulance but i was afraid if i hey glick you're on our show kayla mind your own not now you'll wait yeah she said thought about calling an ambulance but i was afraid i did you would get in trouble for giving me marijuana
00:17:12
Speaker
she said I said to her, so you were so willing to cover up my crime. You were going to lay there and die to keep me out of jail. And she said, well, I thought of it like this.
00:17:23
Speaker
If I did die and I was laying there naked, all sprouting across my bed, you had to see me like that. That would be punishment enough for you for the rest of your life. Yeah. True story. Her will be exactly.
00:17:35
Speaker
No. Goddamn about it. That's one of my family stories. Not Thanksgiving oriented. I do have an Easter story about my son. i don't think I'll tell the exact punchline.
00:17:46
Speaker
But yeah, it's hilarious. I was think might have said it on one of our lazy streams. But that's my that's one of my family stories. so If you've got enough time, I might tell another one. We already burned up was a good half an hour on the show.
00:17:59
Speaker
That's okay. You're better at talking.
00:18:03
Speaker
well I'm not doing the entire show. to to Listen to me. Naked mom scarred for life. ah Don't be jealous that the chatterbox is more popular than you. ah Or Kaylee. Listen to me, damn it. That's right.
00:18:21
Speaker
Linda, honey, Linda, honey, Linda, honey. Listen, listen, listen. We need a clip of that. Great shit, Amanda. huh
00:18:31
Speaker
From Bob's Quaggot. moal most just but The Thanksgiving song is my favorite fucking song ever.
00:18:42
Speaker
And it's going to be stuck in my head. Pass the cranberry sauce for having mashed potatoes. Ooh, the turkey looks great.
00:18:53
Speaker
Thank you for loving me. Oh, Linda singing while she's cooking. You're pretty good, Linda.
00:19:03
Speaker
Putting together with that 6'2 kid from the other night. He's 6'7 with the afro. Glick, don't look at sports scores.
00:19:14
Speaker
No, Haas or whatever his name is. Yes, yes, yes. that' a but you ago we be There be a TV match heaven. ah many of it
00:19:30
Speaker
serenad it like serennaian do you uh do you know the out of chandler thanksgiving song fuck now it oh that's hilarious hey brit hey what do you call this comment what do you call this comment i already flicked him off for it you were in the middle of telling your story it's called a callback that's a callback from saturday night let's call that I watched the entire stream, you guys had me rolling.
00:20:00
Speaker
I was sad I wasn't there, but i had a great night with my wife. I made the right choice. Like Lazy Jedi. Absolutely, I did. i still got just You know who came back to the show? Jedi. He's like, all right, there's my half-hour family set. I saw it. The hilarious thing about is he showed up 15 seconds after Shaman signed out.
00:20:23
Speaker
I was about to text Shaman. He's like, I was about to text Shaman. This going go in your report. You guys had me cracking Yeah. Well, my Thanksgiving usually... one of the family like might rubb name to bring that sho on it what were they I don't remember that is. That's a comedian's story. punline That's a good one.
00:20:49
Speaker
Red-headed Thanksgiving tales. That's fucking funny. Lunch Lady Land. That's a good one. I like that one, too. It's a Thanksgiving song. It's quite funny. Embarrassed for Life. Well, that makes one of us.
00:21:03
Speaker
It's not like it during the first time. Overplay. I'm fond of it.
00:21:08
Speaker
that again yeah i like that would have been the first time you've seen your mom naked we know how you guys are no it was you still have terrifyingly truth terrifyingly true like thanks for the reminder you guys will like when you got a family story for us don't you for anybody that just may happen to be watching that doesn't know it already why don't you tell us a nice story about your mom me Just in case there's nobody here from Saturday or a hundred other shows in the past.
00:21:40
Speaker
Here's one story about your mom.
00:21:44
Speaker
That's where I'm going for Thanksgiving. So, let's see, come here so you can hear. We're not asking questions. We're going to get scared. I've there's a new part to this story that I don't think I've shared but one time.
00:22:00
Speaker
there's ah There's a t tweet. and on saturday yeah yeah Michael has requested the story of my mother. You're going to give Kayla a complex, by the way.
00:22:13
Speaker
So, for those of you guys who may not know, my mom is dead. She has been dead for about 15 years. And... This is hilarious.
00:22:27
Speaker
I mean, she's in a better place, I guess. Yeah, you are rough. Yeah, in your trunk. yeah um Well, I was about to say something and like just skip on over. sure yeah Yeah, Blake's getting what happened was what had happened was my mom died.
00:22:45
Speaker
For some ungodknown reason, her body was donated to science. I feel bad for those scientists. But nonetheless, when you donate your body to science after a few months, however long until they're done with it, when they get done, they just cremate.
00:23:01
Speaker
um So my ex-wife and I, we were moving from Ohio to South Carolina. My dad and my stepmom threw us this big going away party, all the families there.
00:23:13
Speaker
And my stepdad shows up and this whole nother fucking mess of a character. He's dead too. Good riddance. but ah He shows up with this brown bag that you would pack your school lunch in. and He's like, Christopher, I wanted to come and say goodbye. and Before you left, I wanted to make sure that you got some of your mom's ashes.
00:23:38
Speaker
No warning. no I had no idea this was happening. No way, shape, or form was I prepared for it. Mind you, friends, family, all in the yard as he pulls up, all hearing this.
00:23:52
Speaker
and I'm like, great, but I don't know what I'm going to do with it. One of my uncles, oh, Christopher, I bet Joe's got some Tupperware we can put her in. Jesus Christ. Fair enough.
00:24:05
Speaker
My mom's s twin brother goes, yeah, we can put some duct tape around it and put her in her freezer bag. She'll be fine. What?
00:24:18
Speaker
I'm kind of just standing there surprisingly speechless because I don't know where to go with this. Any who's my mom goes in to the Tupperware duct tape freezer bag duct tape freezer double freezer bag just for safekeeping.
00:24:34
Speaker
I move. I have her in the closet. I'm drinking playing video games one night. A tornado goes through my closet. I freak out. like, what the fuck is happening?
00:24:45
Speaker
I go look to see what happened. Everything was a mess in the closet except for my mom's ashes.
00:24:51
Speaker
Put everything together.
00:24:54
Speaker
Clean it all up. Don't think too much about it. It happens again. When you die, fuck it. just fuck It happens again a few weeks later. i'm like, all right, bitch. <unk> go put I'm just going to put you in my car.
00:25:07
Speaker
Now, mind you, the car... that I put her in, I had been yelling at a bank for about six months to come and get, cause I was not paying for it any longer.
00:25:18
Speaker
um Because I didn't want the car. And they basically said I was stuck. So one night about two o'clock in the morning, my neighbor bangs on my door cause there's a tow truck. So I'm running out and the repo man's like, Oh no, no, no, you can't get it. I'm like, look, dude, I just want to get my dead mom. You can literally have everything that's in there.
00:25:38
Speaker
And he stops and he goes, Excuse me? So I get her ashes out. My neighbor's losing it because he's like, dude, you... Apparently the sheriff's letting get the ashes out of the car. My neighbor's losing it because he's like, poor choice of words, click.
00:25:57
Speaker
Two o'clock in the morning screaming at a tow truck driver, your dead mom's in your car. So anywho, bring her in, whatever. We move. Now she's in the truck.
00:26:09
Speaker
gee She was in the truck. ah We move. Same thing happens. She's in the closet. Fuck it, Mommy. You like to be in the car. Fuck it, Mommy. You like to be in the car? Is that what you're just saying? Who's your day hooker in a car joke here?
00:26:25
Speaker
Fuck it, Mom. My mom likes to be in the car. You said i've had mom momy Well, Mommy, whatever. Mommy likes to be in the car. ah I've had her in the closet three times and the bitch destroys it because she wants out so bad. it big you know The third time it was a big mess and that's when I was like, fuck it, I'm just leaving you in the car.
00:26:44
Speaker
I don't think about it most of the time. Other people have driven my car and since then over the over the years she has gained the nickname road rage Ronda because if you hit the brakes too hard or go around the corner too fast she will slide off her underneath the seat and smacking the ankles.
00:27:05
Speaker
So she's been nicknamed Rotary Geronja. However, I kind of give Kayla the abbreviated story of this. just Just kind of in passing, not much yeah like, oh, by the way, ah my dead mom's in my car.
00:27:20
Speaker
i thought I was just going to breathe. Just breathe by it, and there was not going to be any conversation. She goes, excuse me? Your what?
00:27:32
Speaker
Yeah. Is where? Yeah.
00:27:35
Speaker
I said, my mom is in my car under my driver's seat, her ashes. Oh, that's sweet.
00:27:42
Speaker
She's in a Tupperware container with two Ziploc bags. Is it at least taped up and stuff? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I give her the abbreviated rundown, a little bit more abbreviated than what I just did tonight.
00:27:57
Speaker
So I'm like, I'm going to be funny one day we come back. Here's the here's the new the new plot and the the new twist in the story. I'm like, I'm going to be funny one night we come back from dinner or something. I'm like, I'm going to grab my mom and introduce Kayla to my mom.
00:28:13
Speaker
And I reach under to the seat and she's not there. Oh, shit. Dude, instant fucking panic. You know how like your heart drops and you start to get like the cold sweats and everything? Your face went completely white. ah Yeah. like I was like, oh my god, where's my aunt and my mom? My mind starts racing and I go...
00:28:36
Speaker
once
00:28:40
Speaker
My mom's gone! gone!
00:28:44
Speaker
my Jedi, not they. not say Hold on hold on like one second. Jedi, not they. Me. It's my theory. Go back and check it out, Shaman. Thanks for popping through, man. I loved you on Saturday Night Show.
00:28:58
Speaker
Shaman. Yeah, you were you were actually funny.
00:29:04
Speaker
Go ahead, Glenn. okaye so so let's no yeah like that My mind starts racing. I'm like, where the fuck is my mom? Did somebody break into my car and steal my mom's ashes? Why would you steal my mom's ashes? That's weird. Why would you steal a Tupperware container of dirt? That's weird.
00:29:22
Speaker
I know. you know like so and I'm trying to figure out. and I go, ah fuck when i worked at the When I worked at Goodwill this past summer, I had the Riri's clean my car.
00:29:35
Speaker
And they did a great job. this Is this a part of a story that has an intermission? Yeah. good whats first as dark So I'm like, shit, they threw my mom away. My mom is just in a landfill somewhere in Ohio now. get it. You have mommy issues. Well, at least I didn't lose my virginity to my dad.
00:30:00
Speaker
So there's
Family Stories and Jokes
00:30:01
Speaker
that. oh So needless to say, mean, either one of them, I don't, I was just stating, i don't, I didn't say who lost their virginity to their dad. So needless to say, I, I start tearing my car apart and the, the re-reaves were nice enough to put mom in the trunk and she seems to be happy back there. So now mom is no longer under the front seat.
00:30:27
Speaker
She's in the trunk. And eventually one day, maybe she'll get an urn. absolutely That's why Glick is the way he is. Sorry. I'm sorry. She's in the compartment. Because I got a soccer mom car, so I've got my compartment. My snacky compartment.
00:30:45
Speaker
lay we Me and my mommy issues alone, alright? Just because I'm a little... mom ah sure You got whole family issues, Brittany. so Let's be honest. trying to tell you on Thanksgiving the story I was going to say.
00:31:01
Speaker
um and We had 78 members and friends. um And what we usually do is go out and shoot guns and at TVs and whatnot.
00:31:15
Speaker
You know, the Shorebilly shit. um But so and then we do fireworks at night, but they all started having children. so we had to be a little bit more careful with our firework fights so we started giving the kids the roman candles to shoot at us and i was starting to shoot one as in and a kid got in the way and shot him straight in the fucking head he's okay but it was nice that's how like that is all your family stories and then some weird sexual stuff or somebody being murdered
00:31:53
Speaker
and Why do you have to make it sexual, you fuck? It's a firework. I don't like that. I mean, you're from Alabama. No, I'm not. should have told the story about your drunk pilot uncle.
00:32:10
Speaker
ah well Oh, yeah, true. I guess I could. Yeah. he That's a good one. My grandfather was a pilot. He owned two airplanes. One was in the backyard of their house and they had a long and enough landing strip. um it just He would sneak out i think and take the airplane out to fly it at night. And he hit the roof with the wheel and like barely landed. I guess that's funny.
00:32:44
Speaker
He was drunk and flying a pain, and he crashed it into the house. He also taught Tom Cruise the upside-down maneuver in Top Gun.
00:32:55
Speaker
Oh, yeah, he's dead now, too. you couldn't you know That story is enough to tell you. I never met him.
00:33:06
Speaker
Oddly enough, ladies and gentlemen, he died in a car accident, and he wasn't drinking. yeah He was sober. you He wasn't drinking. He wasn't drinking, but I heard he was pretty messed up.
00:33:19
Speaker
Ladies and gentlemen, New Year's Eve. Happy Thanksgiving, guys.
00:33:32
Speaker
happy thanksgiving guys Yeah, yeah. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. um Thanks, y'all, for coming in. i kind of had an epiphany while watching you tell your story and watching the the comments.
00:33:48
Speaker
I used to think they the Chatters Life generates content for us. we are their fucking monkeys generating their goddamn comments they come in and have their own show over there but we got our show over here you motherfuckers make it worth doing this thing man you guys are so much fun hang out with you are hilarious chatterbox here's to you separate else marine thanks coming through sergeant everybody man you guys are great thanks everybody for coming through it feels like a family here to me don't know how you guys feel about it but you are my network family you guys the chatter family
00:34:22
Speaker
I really hope to see a few of you guys. I have not ever liked of you motherfuckers on New Year's Eve, speaking of which, you have the goddamn flyer. I'm not pushing for this tonight. okay no No, no, but you do have the flyer. Can you upload it for me? No, I don't have it.
00:34:38
Speaker
We got to talk. out We'll leave after the show. It's going be a relatively short one tonight cause we got a lot of shit to do tomorrow. I need to be fresh. I haven't been sleeping well the last few days. It's been a goddamn week, man. I have another funny story. So where's my mother?
00:34:53
Speaker
Burning question. We'll let you tell it. I'm not quitting on us right now. I just wanted to make sure while we had these guys still here in case we got to get out of here. much I appreciate them. Kayla's the chat. Kayla's in the chat. She answers. I don't know if Michael would remember my name. MoDog's the one that needs and needs help with your name. Oh, was it MoDog? Yeah, MoDog called you Kayla.
00:35:18
Speaker
Mom's in the trunk. Everybody started doing that. yeah ah She's in the snacky compartment of my soccer mom car. She's safe. She's sound. ah Crisis of birth. Well, I don't know. I mean, I don't know how much of a I guess it would have been like, well, we had a good run, mom.
00:35:34
Speaker
I don't know. I don't really. i don't i don't know. Maybe I'm a heartless piece of shit, man. I really don't have that much of a sentimental attachment to these ashes other than they're a bear great story at the end of the day.
00:35:48
Speaker
I mean, I would love to get her an urn, but at the same time, why am I going to spend money on the urn when she's perfectly fucking happy in Tupperware and in my car?
00:35:58
Speaker
Yeah, I go spend money on the urn.
00:36:05
Speaker
Emotional ashes, loving it The ashes are happy. My emotional support ashes. Your ass is happy? That's right. and we Wait, what? Britt, you got another one to say? You got another story?
00:36:17
Speaker
Yeah, about my uncle the same uncle with the airplane. So my grandfather is a pastor, or was, he's dead too.
00:36:30
Speaker
They were getting ready for church, and my uncle convinced my dad that he would be able to get up in the tree with a bicycle and float down with an umbrella.
00:36:45
Speaker
Did not work out so well. And he broke his leg. See, short story. There you go. I delved into the world of Britney one time, and I'm telling you that... And again, it ended in weird injury.
00:36:58
Speaker
It ended in tragedy. I wasn't sure you wanted to tell a real story. and i had a feeling almost none of them would end in a humorous or uplifting or positive way.
00:37:09
Speaker
It's a broken limb. It's a prison sentence. It's being on paper for a few years. Dude, it's great, man. Behavior is overrated. There's a reason why Brittany hasn't met Brittany.
00:37:22
Speaker
with
00:37:27
Speaker
What happens, man? I know. i i can i'm gonna try this we've been told me I'm retarded, apparently.
00:37:39
Speaker
i was so excited to use this, and I'm just stupid.
00:37:44
Speaker
Tales from the Tupperware Crypt. hear that. Never mind. I was going to say that. Kayla bought me this really cool hammer bottle opener and I'm too stupid to use it.
00:37:59
Speaker
Figures. not surprised. I'm not surprised. She can use it. Shut up. I hate you and the chatterbox and I hate it here.
00:38:12
Speaker
Why I come here? yeah be smarter than bottle opener. Definitely, definitely, definitely. Oh, shit, we're only 38 minutes in. Oh, okay. I was looking at the time time, not the live time. Sweet.
00:38:26
Speaker
I kind of got time. Time. Again, i've got i guess a good luck i'm getting a good rest tonight, man. I got a lot of cooking to do tomorrow. got a lot of family to uphold. I got some friends coming over that don't have family.
00:38:39
Speaker
And I'm kind of excited about it. wo I like doing the ham. It's my game. Yeah. I'm going to the farm to see the cows. I mean, my family.
00:38:50
Speaker
Whatever, same thing.
00:38:55
Speaker
Don't body shame your family. isn' Dude, you you said you wouldn't. How dare you? That's a callback.
00:39:07
Speaker
That's a callback. We're all allowed to be sad. Oh, oh. I cannot it. I cannot wait for that. I'm so excited. Afterwards, backstage afterwards, I figured to just get outside every night, you motherfucker.
00:39:24
Speaker
um I feel like I'm... Calm down, Colette. I figured you guys out. I don't figure it out. the next time i can stop in on saturday night we'll talk more about the wedding i i was like man i wish i could be there talking about the way with you guys because i thought the exact same thing that you did you're like this is a family story you're on the story on the show saturday you were talking about how when you first saw britney you're a hugger i'm a hugger too moda i'm gonna kiss you heard how you are there's nothing with the gentle caress of another man
00:39:59
Speaker
there's nothing wrong with the gentle caress of another man And, oh, man, who was that guy there last night guys trying to be flirty with us but Jersey? He was what did he say? ah God damn it. I say it all the time. Something he said. It's out of my mind already. Doggone it. Last night? Oh, Modal. Modal marked his territory Saturday night. He's like, I'm going need you to calm down, buddy. but Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:40:25
Speaker
Why, Jersey? If you have to ask why, i don't know about you anymore. That silver fox motherfucker. Before you came in the picture, Jersey, Moe Doggin' Hat and I had a thing.
00:40:39
Speaker
Don't ruin it, all right? that's it I was there before you. Well, probably not before you. Well, did he pull an arc it? but the depart did people call an arc kelly
00:40:54
Speaker
Moe dog very first fucking thing out of my mouth when I saw him that day was hey click. Thanks for dressing up True story look Listen, first off, you shut the fuck up.
00:41:10
Speaker
I'm not done. I'm not done. I'm going to tell my end of the story. You had your chance on Saturday. I'm going to clear up my end. What did you call it? is business Business casual fuckable. no no I never said casual.
00:41:23
Speaker
Business fuckable, period. know That was not Sue's idea. but was not susan yeah That was absolutely mine. however before i started sending that to people who are asking me what's the dress code for your wedding i said is that an appropriate response she said so she didn't approve me to say it but yeah this is just fuckgable it's the same thing i wear on stage no that's not what i said at all go back uh go back to the goddamn text i got because that's how i roll i only say things i can prove with backup proof context there or not
00:42:00
Speaker
change I did it again. Anyway, um here's the thing. I've never worked. i bought I've worked construction my entire life. I don't know what business attire is. And I happen to think that I look like I was down for business. And I also think that I was very fuckable.
00:42:19
Speaker
I wear my good boots. Yeah, I wear my good boots. Only you did. Only you did. Watch us talk this last time. I mean, yeah. i mean It was a wedding. Here's a family story. You go to Michael's wedding and it looked like all his invites went to the local nursing home. Like a bunch of jerks in there, man. I'm like, I'm single and ready to marry me. Jesus Christ.
00:42:46
Speaker
just But it's true. No, i'm just kidding. Michael's wedding was a lot of fun. We you know we we had a lot of fun. was great to see him, Sue, and Michael. I think i think Michael, yeah the the table we were at was was awesome.
00:43:03
Speaker
Marco was there. I love Marco. I want to spend more time with Marco. um He was all over the place. Yeah, his is his lady friend, she was awesome. um I don't know what her time was. Oh, and then Melissa and what's-his-face.
00:43:18
Speaker
Yeah, and then what's-his-face what's his face in the in the other... That dude was something else, man. He was funny as shit. He's got a guy beside me, and I'm like,
00:43:29
Speaker
trying to talk to him because he was looking at scores. As I was watching football, even though i got yelled at, homeboy was looking at scores, and I'm like, what game are you looking at? And he just kind of looked at me. I better stop talking to this guy or he's going to put me in a fucking basement or something. but He does the eyeball thing, too. He does.
00:43:47
Speaker
He might. Look at my wedding reception to all the available women. Want to sneak outside and hit some chocolate flavor boost? Ha!
Wedding Tales and Fashion Critique
00:44:02
Speaker
I i got some Insure and Depends. That's right. Who needs that? money now Yeah. good But yeah.
00:44:14
Speaker
I thought I looked very nice. walk me Hold on. It came back to me. Don't sidetrack me again. I'll lose it again. I thought the same exact fucking thing when first put off on Britt. Oh my God. I might break her.
00:44:26
Speaker
Yeah. You know what I mean? She's nice like like, here's the thing. I knew Britt was going to be tiny, but she's way smaller than I thought she was going be. thought you were like much taller. You know what I mean?
00:44:42
Speaker
I thought you were going be closer to like six foot. So you're like tall and kind of lanky. and you're and That was my thing. I was like, oh, wow. She's way smaller than I thought she was going to be. The junk in my trunk is usually bigger, but injuries and everything and health.
00:44:59
Speaker
We're getting there. We're getting there. Yeah. But yeah, it it was great to see you guys all in person again. well britain takes time It was a lot of fun.
00:45:11
Speaker
Yeah. I can't wait for New Year's when I come up there and I'm distracted by Kayla all night and not listening to your comedy. Good. Listen, once the...
00:45:24
Speaker
Once the yeah thing's over, we we got a special chair for you for your roast. and Exactly like every other roast. This will be a legit roast. We're going to run through you. In between roasts.
00:45:38
Speaker
Do whatever you want. You're the guest of honor. Wear your birthday suit for all I fucking care. No, no, no. no Two years. going to run my apparel through kayla and you That way I don't show up, you know, not dressed for the occasion appropriately.
00:46:01
Speaker
That's enough. hey To be honest, and I'm not at all embarrassed to say this, you were not the worst dressed one.
00:46:14
Speaker
That honor went to. You don't want to mention my name.
00:46:19
Speaker
Do it. You won't. Shut up, MoDog. Maybe I'm going to go. No, actually, I'm not wearing a flannel at all on New Year's Eve. I've had a special request for a certain shirt that someone really likes, and that's what i'll be wearing. it's I'll give you a hint. It's mesh.
00:46:37
Speaker
and hardy I'm sure. Nope, but it is mesh. I'm wearing affliction, man. Well, just going to make it so much easier for us I have never worn an Affliction or Ed Hardy shirt in my life.
00:46:54
Speaker
I don't believe you.
00:46:57
Speaker
ah You don't have to, but it's the truth. He's going to be over here eating. I don't know. I heard you in a way about not being trustworthy.
00:47:14
Speaker
You've got a really bad reputation. like I don't know if can trust
00:47:20
Speaker
I'm going wear an Affliction shirt and a dazzle jeans. for That was a nice little family reunion, man. was great. Nope. not going wear an Affliction shirt and a dazzle jeans. I just got the look.
00:47:32
Speaker
New Year's Eve for everyone, just so you know. New Year's Eve has no dress code other than have clothes on. That's it. Come as you are. It doesn't matter. where Wear ah shoes, some kind of legging, a couture mole, and some sort of a top. That's all yeahs all you got to have. What the fuck was that word?
00:47:50
Speaker
I can't wait. you If you can make it, you are fishnet head to toe. That's your dress code. clearly Shout out to Scotto. i was eleven I was loving his AI game. yeah yes a i i mean he was He was killing us. He was killing us with the MoDog. It I mine. I one anyway. We wanted him.
00:48:15
Speaker
fuck you gli i got one anyway if you said fuck you yeah we wanted him That's why we did it like that did. Did you get, did Brick send it to you? Wait.
00:48:27
Speaker
My point is this. Him? he's Yeah. Brick said, do you i have one Michael? And Glick said, fuck Michael. goal He don't come out send it. He don't get one. Fuck him. And I got one anyway.
00:48:40
Speaker
clearly I want. I do. I want all six hours. I love it. I want to have a couple months. Last one. laughing too hard to fucking hear what you guys were saying. had to back up a couple of times, dude. You had me rolling a few times, dude. Everybody was on a roll.
00:48:59
Speaker
yeah Hey, you know if you'd ever fucking come up here so we'd go to the gay bar, you would know. Modog, I'm going to get you a matching one. Only purple. Can I go? that's actually That's what mesh is. That's right.
00:49:12
Speaker
Head to toe and mesh. Scott out. I want to do that. auto to do one of those AIs of Wally and then I want to do like a network thing with all the AIs together. Because Scott, man, he's on point with it. He's great.
00:49:26
Speaker
Definitely, definitely, definitely. and it was this ah This, I can't think of any off top of my head, but this quote-unquote nonsensical family that we have, whether it be the personalities on camera or the chatter's box and everybody that joins us on Saturday nights, I'm sure there are a fuck ton of hilarious stories that we could tell i just can't think of any right off the top of my head uh because there's so many
00:49:56
Speaker
things that have happened and whatnot that sorry wait what the hell all right i was trying to upload the uh jersey stop it the Jersey.
00:50:19
Speaker
No, no, no, no, no. That's shame on you, Jersey. That's no. You put it in the chatterbox or not at all. No, that's no. but Unless it's an image, then I get it.
00:50:31
Speaker
All right, my dog. oh I got it, Michael. I'll download it here in just one second. Did you see that? Yeah, that was pretty cool. I love the MoDog. How come the look keeps getting these cool masculine ones?
00:50:46
Speaker
Mike's cool and masculine too. Might have all look like I'm sucking a dick or something. The booty shorts. Fucking hysterical. That one, I think, got me the best. The booty the booty shorts MoDog.
00:50:58
Speaker
Dude, that's my favorite I was laughing my fucking ass off. That shit had me rolling, man. You guys were having a good time. it wasn't It wasn't a bottle. See, you can tell by my face. I forgot about that. Yeah, michael Michael, I know you're a busy guy and you've got a lot going on. and But man, you've got to come up there. we We have a lot of fun on Saturday nights. And at the end of the day, I mean, it's a fun wind-down. that
00:51:32
Speaker
That was kind of my mindset with with Saturday nights was just like, unplug and forget about the bullshit and and the stress of work and politics and life and and now it's just evolved into you know when i when i decided to the open door challenge i honestly just thought that was just going to be like a complete fucking train wreck and we were going get a bunch of fuck i mean we do get a bunch of fucking weirdos on there but we got awesome weirdos to come on there and hang out with us and it's just just become a monster of its own and it's it's so much fun and and and and
00:52:04
Speaker
We do. There's not train wreck at all. A really strong, really cool train wreck. It can get much sometimes, but we pull it back.
00:52:15
Speaker
Last Saturday, I feel like, yeah, we definitely, it was a group of people, for sure. It was fun. and and and so Myself as a host, you know i know the last, and i'll and I'll go ahead and apologize for it now.
00:52:31
Speaker
last The last several months, I've had a lot of personal shit going on, and it's it's reflected in how I do shows, and things are coming around, and life is good. And you know I'm getting back to my my old shenanigans and my old self where I'm just coming in and having fun on Saturday nights and and doing what I do, doing what we do. Because you're happy now. with man Life is done for the for the time being.
00:52:58
Speaker
done kicking me in the dick.
00:53:02
Speaker
Knock on wood. Well, hopefully it gets back to you soon. It's switch tracks to me.
00:53:09
Speaker
I've had a rough one, man. and Unfortunately, I don't have control of the track. tra I wish I did have control of the train that that track was on because I could be fucked. That would be a lot of fun.
00:53:23
Speaker
You could be fucked? That's what I thought you were going to say. Well, I was going to say... People could be fucked, but... ah so yeah oh I'm downloading at that flyer right now.
00:53:39
Speaker
You just chill. Thanks for that, Jeremy. We do, too. we love it We love it when things are all good for anybody.
00:53:48
Speaker
And I mean anybody. Overlay... There we go. Oh, yeah. In your overlay, the flyer's in there now, Michael. Oh, the background of the video. Cool, man. Thanks.
00:54:01
Speaker
Yes, Mo Dogg. Yes. Yes. Actually better. Do
00:54:08
Speaker
but you see Dogg's comment? Are you still? It's too simple tennis, everybody. It's easy to be kind. Can't help somebody who should. Life's too short to carry grudges and speed.
00:54:23
Speaker
Life's too short to hate. That's why comedy is a really important thing. That's a good song.
00:54:31
Speaker
good bre I walked over you. I said, I think that's why comedy is a very important thing because it makes people laugh and smile and it releases, you know, everything.
00:54:41
Speaker
So, yeah.
00:54:45
Speaker
Enhancing the joy of others. yeah Not diminishing it. That's worth it. Completely. That's worth it. And i hope you're doing better. Better. It's cool.
00:54:58
Speaker
Better and better and better. come see us on new year's eve and yeah dude we got to uh life sometimes like dicks just way too short to stress about it yeah you're lucky i wasn't there with you i want i want to get short tattooed on my dick was like well what do where are they gonna put the ort that was my comment where were they gonna put it you just put it up to her make my patience laugh every day i won't repeat it just in case i don't know how your privacy is there jersey i heard what you do for a living
00:55:29
Speaker
You are a fucking angel. I couldn't do that. It would kill my soul. I couldn't do it. You are a very rare breed. What you do is a calling. And not all heroes wear capes. is Not just stupid phrase.
00:55:43
Speaker
You are a fucking mensch. Well, not a mensch. That's a man. But you know what i'm saying. You're the tops.
00:55:50
Speaker
ah but all You might want to have a conversation with Jersey. according to Michael. Michael's words, not mine. I didn't say it.
00:56:01
Speaker
You literally just... no what do you What do you do when you finally meet her and she's got a dick bay in bigger than yours?
00:56:14
Speaker
I'm sorry. No, I'm not. Listen, as i always say, don't take anything I say seriously or personally. It's all just a goof. I fuck around.
00:56:26
Speaker
do it here You're very welcome, journey really
00:56:32
Speaker
Jersey. Thank you, man. That's the end of the show, guys. Thanks, everybody, for hanging out. Happy Turkey Day, everybody. Thanks to every last viewer that popped in here, every last listener that was out there.
00:56:44
Speaker
Catch us on Mondays with Wally. He does motorsports on Monday. Yes, it's motorsports Monday. Check us out on Tuesday where well some guy, what's his name? He's the host on Tuesday. it's um Oh, yeah. It's this dickhead down here. It's Glick. The grandfather of the Nonsensical Network with Glick's House of Music every single Tuesday night. Check that shit out on Wednesdays. Obviously, you know where are Wednesdays.
00:57:14
Speaker
God damn it. when they know You're killing it, dude. What's the only goddamn show we're on? We're on Humpty Ha-Ha's, y'all. Thank you. Every single Wednesday. I can't remember the name of my goddamn shows when i'm finally getting everybody else's down. That's what happens. New information comes in. Old information gets pushed out.
00:57:34
Speaker
Thursday nights. Check out Wally again with ah Cold Blood Conversations. Then we're right back to Friday. You got my stupid ass again. The professional idiot himself with Mike. God damn it. Movie night with Michael and France. I also want to put my name first.
00:57:48
Speaker
You think you're egotistical. You narcissist. I have... i have ah Different guest hosts. We talk about film in all sorts of ways. ah That's a good time. Check that out.
Closing and Song Dedication
00:58:00
Speaker
Taking us into Saturdays where may have wrestling again someday in the future, as I heard on Saturday. But you can always get Unnecessary Roughness in the afternoon on Sundays and then right back around until Monday again if we do it all a little more time. I kind forgot about the most important show on the entire network on Saturday night.
00:58:21
Speaker
Jesus, Michael, you need to go get some rest. Let's end this shit. I get like have a meeting with you in my office after this show. going to have to discuss your performance. We need to do that.
00:58:33
Speaker
I need a raise. Thank you all for coming out. Thank you on the network. And um we're going to be having, I have the tickets finally.
00:58:45
Speaker
Took little but the a little minute to get them printed. So I do have the tickets. We're doing a very, very special limited edition, very, very limited meet and greet tickets.
00:58:57
Speaker
You get to spend an extra hour up close and personal with all the performers that night. The network folks that can be there. And um a couple little bonus prizes if you get those VIP meet and greet tickets.
00:59:09
Speaker
Other than that, it's $20 a $35 a pool. Going to run a Black Friday sale. Keep an eye on the network page on Facebook and Instagram. Where else are we, Glick? Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, Spotify, Grindr, yes.
00:59:28
Speaker
Glickfinders.com.
00:59:31
Speaker
If you want to post your picture, me fatie put them on ClickFinders. ClickFinders.com, your All of our links are there.
00:59:48
Speaker
Give us follow, give us like, give us a share. Thank you very much for popping through again. Get at me, man. I want to come on your panel one of these nights. It looks like a lot of fun.
01:00:00
Speaker
But yeah, that is it. That is it. That is it. Thanks, everybody. Appreciate you all. Happy Turkey Day. Never forget the great tragedy that happened back in the day in Cincinnati. The great turkey drop.
01:00:11
Speaker
Never forget. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Mike Hobart.
01:00:18
Speaker
So stay right there. Here you go.
01:00:30
Speaker
I got married five weeks ago today to that fantastic punky right now. I don't trust your judgment, but this song goes out to my baby.
01:00:40
Speaker
If I had a hammer, I'd build a house with you. If I had a sailor ship, I'd take a trip with you.
01:00:57
Speaker
If I had the poet's hand, I'd write a verse, repeat. If had the painter's touch on canvas, you would be.
01:01:07
Speaker
But I don't have a hand, and I don't have a ship. So I can't build you a house, and you cannot take the trip. I'll never have a poet's name.
01:01:22
Speaker
Never will I have the painter's grace. Nor will I not write your verse. Nor will I moralize your face. And also, you almost certainly
01:01:55
Speaker
Put your hands in the sun outlaw's bed, everybody. That's a goddamn noise. Give it up for Mr. Michael Coleman-Haber that has herpes.
01:02:07
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Oh, don't forget to take your bar, tender. All your applause goes to death. Thank you for making wish come true.