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The Pressure to Have the Perfect Summer
779 Plays10 days ago
It’s that magical (and chaotic) time of year when school’s out, the sunscreen is everywhere, and moms everywhere are chasing that elusive “perfect summer.” In this honest and hilarious episode, the hosts share the toys they regret buying, their latest “mom fails,” and how summer break can sometimes feel more stressful than restful. Caitlin opens up about her own experience resisting the urge to overplan, while Charlotte, Kallie, and Megan reflect on how childhood memories are made in the smallest, most spontaneous moments.
Later, they’re joined by special guest Michelle Grosser, certified trauma-informed life coach and host of the Alive and Well Podcast. Michelle shares practical tips for managing summer burnout and how to embrace a mindset shift—from pressure and perfectionism to presence and peace.
From nostalgic summer stories to real talk about parenting guilt, this is the reminder all moms need: your kids don’t need a “Pinterest-perfect” summer… they just need you.
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Transcript
On-Camera Makeup Tips
00:00:00
Speaker
what are we working on over there, Caitlin? Well, you guys if you saw me in person, i'm very, there's a lot of makeup on me, but on this screen, I look like white.
00:00:11
Speaker
So you do that. great This is what I do before every YouTube video that I've ever filmed. You do that, but you look fine. You don't look white. What's that? hi call you You pinch your cheeks. It's like instant blush.
00:00:23
Speaker
Gently pinch. gently pench
00:00:30
Speaker
I just feel like I... like, I don't know. On the apples of your cheeks, I give them a pinch. Because i I'm the same way. Every time I get on camera, I'm like, wait, don't I have blush on? But how long does it take for the effects of the pinch to go away? Who knows? I'm sure it's in my head, but it makes me feel better. Did you guys ever see that thing where you would stick your lips in the bottle?
00:00:52
Speaker
yeah I remember when people did that. Oh my God. Callie, I keep picturing some like subreddit about your feed where people are like, Callie must be so nervous when she starts to each YouTube video. Like her cheeks are so flushed in the first minute.
Introduction to 'Just for Moms' Podcast
00:01:05
Speaker
And that I'm sure somebody has something to say about it somewhere. Yeah.
00:01:10
Speaker
welcome to just for moms i'm charlotte i'm caitlin i'm megan and i'm callie we are regular moms talking about regular stuff like aging parenthood work-life balance and figuring out what's for dinner again a no judgment zone to talk laugh and maybe cry about all the things women think about on a daily basis well welcome back listeners this episode 22 of the just for moms podcast i have callie charlotte Megan, and my name is Caitlin, and here we are.
Children and Snack Habits
00:01:43
Speaker
it is the magical time of year that school is out. Sunscreen is in every crevice of your body and your car. and I don't know about you, but your kids are always, someone is always asking for a snack.
00:01:56
Speaker
I mean, is that how it is for you? So many snacks. I had to explain to my four-year-old what bored eating is, because I'm like, this is what you're doing. That's not how you eat.
00:02:08
Speaker
Did you describe what then what intentional eating is? Just a little. I was like, you're not actually hungry. You just you're just eating because you feel bored. This is. But if you just waited until normal, i don't I don't know if it got through, but I'm just trying to explain. to Like she'll be like sitting and she'll be like, I'm hungry. I'm like, you're not. You're just bored. And I get it because I do it.
00:02:27
Speaker
I do it, too My kids have graduated to the ask for forgiveness, not permission stage of snacking. And so the only way I know what they've been stealing is A, if it's gone from the pantry and B, if they happen, i mean, if, when I go to their room and notice like, oh, that's where the, yeah.
00:02:47
Speaker
Oh yeah. yeah Ah, the Ritz crackers. I don't care how many times they say you're not allowed to eat in your bedroom. And then I come in and I find some remnants of some kind of snack.
00:02:58
Speaker
We don't eat upstairs. Yeah. How many times do I have to it? Or the other day, someone, I'll not name who, because I know we don't do that on this podcast. There was a huge bag from Costco of popcorn, big bag, okay? Yeah.
00:03:14
Speaker
Someone was probably eating and it was dinner time and wasn't supposed to be. And then I was like, come for dinner. And someone left it behind pillows. Okay. And then I found it and I was like, screamed down everyone's name.
00:03:29
Speaker
Everyone came down, kind of. And I was like, who did this and how long has this been back here? And it had been back there for a week. So of course I threw it out, but it's like, you just wasted – a nice huge Costco bag of like popcorn and that like would have lasted like, you know?
Challenges with Children's Toys
00:03:46
Speaker
I have a follow-up question. what What cushion is this behind that a giant Costco bag of popcorn went unnoticed? So the pillows in the living room, like the corner pillows. The fancy living room.
00:03:58
Speaker
yeah ah We only have, yeah, we just have one basic living room. And I feel like some, you know, though it's a pillow overload. I probably should get rid of some of them. And the pillow overload hid the the popcorn.
00:04:11
Speaker
So yeah. I feel like it's one of those, like you're seeing the pictures with stuffed animals, but there's like an, actually a dog in it. It was just like pillow, pillow, popcorn bag, but it just matched with the pillows. yeah I love that.
00:04:23
Speaker
Well, I spent the morning vacuuming up tiny beads and sparkles from this overpriced slime kit that I got my daughter because we've already started If you listen to our last episode, my middle child has a birthday for three months.
00:04:40
Speaker
It's all of summer and we already had to start celebrating. So it started making me think about all of the like toy choices. i have regretted all the toys that I have regretted purchasing for my children, whether it's an indoor or outdoor toy, it maybe end ends up in the trash after the first time we used it. So can you guys think of a toy choice, a toy purchase that you regret?
00:05:04
Speaker
Yeah. All of them. I want hear it. Yeah. So I always... I've gotten better, but you know the toys that you know are going to be great fun, but the only way to put them away are if they are in exactly the same placement.
00:05:17
Speaker
Like, I'm looking at you, Jenga blocks. Like, the only way they can go back in the box is if they are expertly placed. like So those... I'm never going to get those again.
00:05:28
Speaker
i feel like we've explored all of the various, like, hover-type crafts, like the little balls. Like, there's a whole...
00:05:36
Speaker
like category of toys and they're, I don't know, they're 10, $15. So they're sort of an obvious choice for a birthday or something, but they, the minute they hit something wrong, they ding and dent like little drones.
00:05:47
Speaker
Those just say no to them. And then the last one I will keep doing, but I've learned to set my parameters in advance. You know, those water balloons where you blow up like a hundred at one time. Mm-hmm.
00:05:59
Speaker
They're amazingly fun and they're great for a party, but you have to set the, like every one of these little pieces of rubber has to be picked up or latex, sorry, has to be picked up before.
00:06:11
Speaker
Like that's part of the deal. If you want to play with these, you have to pick up all the balloons. So those are the three that come to mind right off the bat. Mine's like anything with lots of little pieces.
00:06:22
Speaker
I mean, I just, you have to also remember my kids are all six and under. So like those things are not there. It's, this is not like my child's getting a Lego kit and like building the Lego. So like just anything, I almost don't even take them out anymore. Like if they're gifted to us, I stick them away for like a rainy day.
00:06:39
Speaker
never, you know? or just like a number Yeah. So like any little, like, you know, I'm trying to think of example, like a little marble run. Yeah. Or like a stable with a little horse and it has the little brush and the little water trough and the little fake carrots. I'm like, no,
00:06:57
Speaker
mag my four-year-old has one doll house set. And like, you know, it's like a set comes with like, it's a brand, you know, like the brand has, and we have just the bag and that's it. No other, other things.
00:07:10
Speaker
Okay, one thing that comes to mind for me is that k connect sand, okay? Yes. yeah And it does not connect. It does not stay together. It's a huge mess. so How it usually comes out, if we can't go outside and play with it, I put it in like a cookie sheet. Even still.
00:07:29
Speaker
Even still. It's like sand on the counter, sand on the floor. And I'll never forget this. We had a neighbor come over, right? Yeah. And I have like a craft bin of like all so in the shelf in the basement with all crafts and inside more bins and this and that. And so try to be organized. It's not.
00:07:49
Speaker
So I said to the girls, you know, why don't you go check out the craft bin? See if there's something in the craft bin you want to play with. Right? Okay. The neighbor brought up the Kinect sand. Mm-mm.
00:08:01
Speaker
Now, if it was one of my kids, I would have been, uh-uh, we're not playing with that today. But I, you know, it's the the neighbor. i don't know why I felt bad. I mean... then When she came over and played with us, this was like a huge mess. Because then you got to sit there with the wipes and clean. And then she got it on like my mike chair, my stools, and then you're in there.
00:08:21
Speaker
Because it does not stay connected. so i And they're doing like this. Oh, yes and like yeah. Yeah. And then when she left. It does connect. It connects with the carpet. It connects with everything but the, yeah. Yeah. no And I remember when she left that day, Gianna was like, I'm You haven't let me play with Kinect Sand for like two years.
00:08:41
Speaker
I was like, well, it's the neighbor. Like, I felt bad, but I should have said no. Yeah, look, this is why. One I just thought of now, someone reminded me, i don't know how it came to, but water beads.
00:08:55
Speaker
like Oh, yes. They're so i' cool in theory, but they just make a ginormous mess. Outdoor only. yeah Yes, and then i also...
00:09:07
Speaker
found out that children can die if they ingest
Concerns About Plastic and Health
00:09:10
Speaker
them. And so I just threw away the entire- I think they're dying when they ingest the small ones. Before they get- Yes, before they get- I mean, yeah. yeah Not to negate it, but i can I think it's the growing- Like, I don't think a single- no Water bead is the- No, it's the growing of them. It's the growing them. Yeah. So I just threw that box out.
00:09:31
Speaker
I'm about to go throw away the- gooey, gooey slime kit that I got though, because there's tiny little things everywhere and they look like little nerds. Like I went to eat one.
00:09:42
Speaker
It's not nerds. Yeah. They put it in it. It's all those, like you get like 40 different little compartments of stuff and then they put it in it and then it's glitter and pins and yeah. Yeah.
00:09:54
Speaker
I hate it. slime free in this house. I refuse. Smart, smart. I'm so jealous. Well, yeah you know, that's a mom failing itself. Cause I, bought it for her.
00:10:04
Speaker
So anybody have any good mom fails this week? Mine's sort of silly, but I feel like you had a similar one last week, last episode.
00:10:15
Speaker
My oldest is away at school, as you guys know, and she, she was meant to go see the orthodontist. I don't know, back in like February or March. And if you don't, so I didn't schedule her appointment when she was home for her long weekend,
00:10:30
Speaker
And they just keep calling. And it's like, I know she's late. I know I need to do it. And her teeth are jacked because she never wears her tray. Like none of it is good. We've already gone through a whole round of it. And then she forgot to wear her trays. And so now they're crooked and we're doing the trays again. So part of me is like, at this point it's on you. I don't know. You're old enough to know like you have free will, I guess, you know.
00:10:51
Speaker
So I need to schedule that when we hang up. I'm going to go do that. That and my kids well visits. I just need to schedule it. Your doctor doesn't have it like where you leave the well visit from one year and then they say, okay, and here's your next year appointment.
00:11:06
Speaker
No, I mean, maybe they would. My dentist does that for me, but for the well visits, it's like, ah it would never stick. Like there's no way that a year from now, that time and that date is going to coordinate with something that's going to work. So it's easier just to call a month before. And no, but I always just take it so that when I see it on the calendar, then I can call and reschedule. yes Yes. They don't even off. I mean, I've never asked. They don't offer it. It's certainly not protocol for our practice.
00:11:35
Speaker
Callie, how about you? I don't know. I didn't write one down. i mean, God knows there's just 8 million bajillion like fails. So many things that I've missed. I was supposed to pick up something. we got something framed.
00:11:48
Speaker
And like they called me a week and a half ago. I didn't even see the voicemail. That's just where I am in my life. Too many fails to count. We're like that with the waivers that I need to be turning in. I think at this point when this airs, school will officially be over. But the last two weeks of school, the number of field trips, these they're going on once for band with their grade. And I feel like I'm on top of it. But then every day I get an email that's like, hey, Mrs. Smith, we need.
00:12:12
Speaker
And it's like, OK, whatever. yeah Yeah. The other day, Michael got back from school and he was like, oh, Miles has a field trip today. He's like, did you sign the thing? I'm like, guess so. I don't know. I don't know.
End-of-School-Year Chaos
00:12:22
Speaker
I don't know. Yeah.
00:12:22
Speaker
yeah I just discovered it's the end of the year fifth grade. How many years? like I don't understand how many years I would have been able to do this, but in there's an app I could sign in the field trip forms.
00:12:33
Speaker
Oh yeah. I do it in the app too, but still. We don't have that. It may be new. We've only recently been able to sign things online with certain schools. I bet it's something they haven't had. or you Or you know what we got the other night and I was kind of like, we can't like do this. I don't know when would be a good time. A capsule letter i had to write for Nico. He's in second grade.
00:12:53
Speaker
I had to write it last week and then he gets it when he graduates high school. I'm like, is this really a good time to do this? So I'm like ah should askedta trying to like. to like Put memories in a letter because he's like, mom, you did it right.
00:13:07
Speaker
You submitted it right. It's due. And I'm like, yeah, I did it. But I like didn't want to be doing it at like 11 o'clock at night because I mean. Why do they put everything at the end of school?
00:13:17
Speaker
Our school has a grandparents day. I'm like with it right now with everything else is too many things. No, that letter should hit your inbox like middle of February. You're right, Charlotte. The wintertime. There's nothing else to do. Yes.
00:13:30
Speaker
meg Well, Megan, aside from failing to do the letter on time, do you have anything else? okay aye We ran out of bottled water in our house, okay?
00:13:41
Speaker
You would think the world was ending. Okay, mind you, everyone pours it in their Stanleys and in their Yetis and in this and in that. And you have plumbing, right? Yeah.
00:13:51
Speaker
And the water filter thing too, but it was like, we know we don't have any bottled water. I'm like, well, I mean, you like you walk in town, i'm I'm thinking my teenager, like if you want to grab one at the mobile mart or like, yeah, we ran out. I'll go tomorrow, right?
00:14:08
Speaker
And again, i use the filtered water for my coffee, my drinks, ah everything. But like they all use like the bottled water because, you know.
00:14:22
Speaker
That's high class. I mean, I don't know about your house. Like, again, no one really drinks from the the plastic bottles because, you know, they say not to. But, like, I don't know. It's still the same thing.
00:14:33
Speaker
They're putting the plastic water bottle in their other water bottle. Yeah. Well, you know, with, like, cancer and all that, they say, like, you're not supposed to drink from the bottled water. does just people I don't know. Oh, like putting your lips to the plastic? To the plastic bottled water. I don't know. or Never heard that as I drink right out of my bottled computer. Oh, red dye, Caitlin, red dye. Don't do it.
00:14:53
Speaker
I've had a bottle of water in like the cup holder of my car enough days that it's gotten hot. And like at that point you're like, it's definitely. Oh, still drink it. Yeah. I drink it. I'm like, I'm thirsty. Like it's just two times. It's not going to, if that's what does it, then it was my time. I listen i don't know. yeah I, I welcome the feedback from some scientist who has studied the data and understands it. My kid the other day was like, oh, we can't we can't eat that though because of, she got like Swedish fish. And she was like, we can't eat that though because of red dye, right? And I was like, here's how my brain processes this information. i
00:15:24
Speaker
i am confident that someone has studied red dye and that compared to all the other food additives, I'm confident that it's not, like there's something in it that is probably not Great.
00:15:36
Speaker
I was like, however, the volume of red dye that you would need to ingest, I suspect is not physically possible. And how often do you have Swedish fish? And she was like, i don't know, once a month. I was like, if you're eating two bites of red dye,
00:15:51
Speaker
once a month, twice a month. Like I just, i I think you just have to like right size it all. And I brought up in our previous podcast, we were talking about like drinking out of the garden hose. i And I use that example.
00:16:03
Speaker
I was like, technically the plastic and garden hoses, like that probably is a toxic chemical, but you physically can't drink enough water with this laced garden hose water. You physically, like you would die of whatever it is, hyper when you have too much water in your body.
00:16:19
Speaker
Yes. So I don't know. I want the evidence that putting your face to a plastic water bottle is going give you lip cancer or whatever. I don't know. I don't know. But yeah, no, you're right. I feel like, and you know what? Someone sent me a clip too, Charlotte, like drinking from the bottled water. If you drink like 20 of those a week, it equals to like having a whole food plastic bottle in your system. I don't know. There was some corny thing.
00:16:44
Speaker
There's no way. That feels like lot. So what did your kid do? Did they walk to the mobile mart? No. No, they had to use the pitcher and the... Oh, God. I know, the filtered water, which is like what I use all the time. Oh, God. But they make their drinks and they're this for this and the that, the that. And I don't... The water's just there for pretty much everyone else. I don't really... For me, because I'm thinking in my head how much it costs for all the bottled water. It's raining.
00:17:09
Speaker
Right. I use the pitchered water or like, you know, whatever. I'm i'm fine. And look at us. Listen, my kids aren't looking, they get faucet water. I'm not even walking to the fridge to use the filter thing.
00:17:21
Speaker
Nothing wrong with the faucet. Same. Thank you. I'm glad. I don't feel like that bad anymore. So it's not even a fail. Let's move on. No. No. no You saved yourself some money. Yeah.
00:17:32
Speaker
Yeah. Good job. Pat yourself on the back.
Summer Parenting Pressures
00:17:35
Speaker
Well, this week we're talking about the pressure to have the perfect summer. This topic, I feel like a lot of parents can relate to. And maybe while I was researching a lot of teens, a lot of college students, there's so many different reasons and factors that would make you feel like you need to build up to this perfect summer.
00:17:58
Speaker
And I pulled up some statistics about this, about how many people feel like they can actually relax in the summer. So younger adults ages 18 to 34 years old find summer significantly more enjoyable than their older counterparts, with 35% reporting a much more relaxing experience than others.
00:18:19
Speaker
And then it listed activities that they might do. And I said, oh that's interesting. Okay. Well, what about people in our age bracket? Adults aged 35 to 49 years old, the level of relaxation halves to just 17%, which is likely due to increased work and family responsibilities.
00:18:39
Speaker
And I was like, hmm, OK, let's let's continue with these statistics. Adults aged 50 to 64 find summer much more relaxing at a rate of 22 percent.
00:18:50
Speaker
Well, yeah, no shit, because they don't have children living at home with them. And then over 64, like 65 and up, they were just living loving their lives.
00:19:02
Speaker
So then I gave up. I said, there's no statistics over that. Like i could really read because I think everyone does feel in some way at some point in their life, I'm having the best summer ever.
00:19:15
Speaker
It's in movies, it's in songs. I mean, i just could vividly remember peeling out of the parking lot my junior year of high school with all my friends and everyone just like screaming and playing music like it's going to be the best.
00:19:30
Speaker
And oftentimes it's not because what makes a perfect summer? As parents, I think there is a tremendous amount of pressure to relax and make your summer enjoyable.
00:19:43
Speaker
And it comes from social media. it comes from fear of judgment from other parents. It comes from comparison games, et cetera, et cetera. Personally, i promised myself I want to say it was last summer that I was just going to look at our calendar, see what we had going on.
00:20:03
Speaker
There are some camps and vacations and say, that's it. Everything that happens in between all of that is just going to happen. I'm not going to plan anything in advance because it could rain. Somebody could get sick. We could decide to go on a day trip.
00:20:21
Speaker
And I found last summer to be much more enjoyable than summers in the past where I was trying to plan something here and there, um like everywhere. So I want to hear how you guys approach summer, what you think about the pressure of a perfect summer and and so on. Does anyone want to start?
00:20:42
Speaker
We have never had fancy summers. we We've just never had the budget to do. i mean, we've always had a trip this summer. We don't have anything planned. It's just not in the cards for us.
00:20:54
Speaker
It also coincidentally is the first summer we've sort of entered that phase of parenting where our kids are doing sports all summer, which is a new, we've never had that. And it's for my older kids who like want to be doing this, but it just means that there's weekend commitments with tournaments. And my son is on the wanting to do football in high school. And so that for whatever reason that starts like the first day of summer. So I think this summer is going to be very low key. We are hopefully going to go. My sister has a place on the beach that we can go. So I think we're going to try to sort of play it by ear and get down to the beach for a little bit.
00:21:31
Speaker
But I, I mean, I think it's all about like managing expectations and summer is always going to be exciting because it's just summer. We definitely try to see friends and entertain and that might happen on a weeknight. It might happen on a week weekend. So we do a little bit more of that in the summer, which is sort of fun for everyone.
00:21:52
Speaker
But I mean, I hear you. i I feel the same way about like they only have eight weeks and I want to give them a special memory. I think what I've learned over the years is that you can do that in a day or in a weekend. And that's something that we can do kind of
Creating Simple Summer Memories
00:22:07
Speaker
spur of the moment. Like I feel like one summer i just took the kids like up to Boston for the night on a Tuesday or something. So I think that is sort of where I'm going to approach it, which is I don't have anything planned right now, but you know, there's certain things that I know will be fun. Maybe we'll go into the city one day. Maybe we'll, I mean, we live on the beach. We actually don't go to the beach very often, but like going to the beach one night and ordering pizza to the beach, that's something we never do otherwise. So I think that's sort of where I've landed I've
00:22:37
Speaker
We'll see. We'll see. I'll let you know. I'd be interested to hear what your kids will say, you know, like halfway through the summer, if they're enjoying all their sports and everything, or if they're telling you, why aren't we doing X, Y, and Z?
00:22:50
Speaker
Because mine aren't really, my kids are totally ungrateful. I tell them this all the time because every summer we have to, we go on a lot of vacations to see my husband's parents are divorced. So we go with both sets of grandparents somewhere. And then we go with my parents So my children are having three vacations.
00:23:09
Speaker
How could you ever complain you're bored? And they still do. Hopefully as they get older, they, you know, cut it out, but. Yeah. I mean, I feel badly. The one vacation that they really look forward to that we do every year is very mellow. It's quiet. We just go to a lake in New Hampshire and we just, we couldn't swing it this year.
00:23:29
Speaker
And we told them, you know, they've known. It's not like it's a surprise. So I do feel badly because that is a very sweet and simple vacation that they all really look forward to. And I, we just, we just can't do it. And I didn't get into details. It just,
00:23:43
Speaker
you know, we said vacation is a big commitment and we just, yeah we don't have the time. We don't have the finances. So we'll go back. But again, I have the parenting guilt about that, but these kids are fed and clothed and they're going to have a great summer. So I try not to get too in the weeds with it all.
00:24:00
Speaker
And I wasn't, i have to defend myself if anyone listening is like, why would she say that? Her kids are going to complain. it was just more of a, like, you know, you said they have all these sports things that they wanted to do.
00:24:13
Speaker
Will they still say that? Oh, yeah.
00:24:19
Speaker
Callie, I'm sorry I interrupted you. It's okay. My thoughts about it went off of Charlotte's a little bit because... I feel like when I think back, we talked about this a little in our last podcast about birthdays and like thinking back about our birthdays growing up. Like, so when I think back about my childhood growing up, like I don't really remember, like none of these like big events are the things that stick out to me as my memories. Like I'm sure that I went to amusement parks and science museums and I'm sure we did like overnight trips, places, but like those aren't the ones like I really remember. Like when I, if you asked me to like, what was your childhood summer like?
00:24:52
Speaker
I think about like, you know, crabbing, you know, with my friends or like I have like vivid memories of like being with my neighbors sitting on the grass, like looking up and like saying what the clouds were. Or we had a really good friends and we got to sleep out on the trampoline at night sometimes, you know, we probably woke up like covered in mosquitoes. Like those are the things that I remember most vividly from my childhood. And so.
00:25:16
Speaker
I try to think about that a lot. And I'm like, I i mean, I want my children to have those same memories. And in order to do that, I almost have to do the opposite and like step back and like not over plan and not give them too much stuff because it's their chance to go out and like make those memories.
00:25:31
Speaker
So i think about that. I mean, summer can be stressful for me just because all of the kids are home. I'm still working through the summer. So like I don't I'm not it's not like I'm just off to be able to be like their fun director.
00:25:44
Speaker
So it's navigating that. Like I remember last summer, like the laundry gets way ahead of me and the house is just dirtier. and my neighbor's dogs are barking so loud. i don't know if you can hear that.
00:25:55
Speaker
So that part is sort of stressful. And I have to like take a step back from that a little bit and just like let it be messier and let it be whatever. Callie, you made me think I was... putting something in Martha's Martha's my, um, she'll be eighth grade next year.
00:26:10
Speaker
I was putting something in her room and I noticed on her cork board that she and her best friend had put together a bucket list, a summer bucket list. And I won't read it all. First of all, there's not anywhere on it. It isn't like a week to the beach or a week it's trampoline sleepover is one of them.
00:26:26
Speaker
It's like beach volleyball, a two day sleepover, watch the sunset on the beach. paint shoes. I mean, it's so basic and it was such wonderful insight into like, I can co-sign on every single one of these.
00:26:40
Speaker
There's nothing here that is overly extravagant. And this is, they came up with this idea. They did it all on their own. So it's a nice reminder that your kids don't need the big stuff. Yeah. And I feel like by allowing ourselves to like step back from the big stuff, we're like, we're allowing them to have that, those memories where if we were like,
00:26:58
Speaker
packing their time with all of this stuff, then they would have that stuff, which is great. But yeah, I feel like they'd be missing some of the other watching the sunset on the beach. Yeah. I love that. Megan, what do you think about the perfect summer?
00:27:11
Speaker
So all – I want to start off with this whole like we only have 18 summers with our kids. Okay. That is BS, okay, for the birds because let me tell you something.
00:27:24
Speaker
am still – At my parents' house, at their beach house, trashing their house, and I'm 43. So there's no 18 summers. That does not apply. Whoever made that up and then, oh, we have to just jam pack all these things and we only have this much time with them. Nah.
00:27:41
Speaker
They came up with the live, laugh, love signs too. We're not into those people. Yeah. Or what's the one in the kitchen that some people have over there? gather Yeah.
00:27:53
Speaker
Yeah. So- And I do have to say personally, i definitely feel like I put stress on myself to those summer bucket lists that are out on social media or you get it emailed or i definitely put in the past, I feel like I've put stress on myself to make sure you go to amusement park and make sure you have an ice cream night.
00:28:15
Speaker
But now that I feel like, you know, my kids are getting older and teens, it's like they want to spend time with their friends too, which I don't know if that makes it easier or harder because then you have to like implement like we need family time too.
00:28:30
Speaker
But then yeah, same thing. You get into the sports. We have one that plays travel sports in our house. And then you open up the can of worms of camps. And Nico, my youngest, he doesn't like to go all day. He only likes to go half day and then we go to the town pool.
00:28:47
Speaker
And then one does like to do sleep away camp and that's pricey. So we said to her, like her friends go for five and eight weeks. I said, you could go for two.
00:28:58
Speaker
So it's just a lot of different moving parts, but I feel like going to the beach, having that just those days you wake up and you have
Productive Activities for Older Kids
00:29:06
Speaker
nothing to do too. Like I try to have a few weeks where there's nothing scheduled. So you kind of just roll with the punches and those are probably the the best days too. Like a friend will text you at like four o'clock. Hey, you want to meet at...
00:29:19
Speaker
the park and I'll bring this. Can you bring that? And you throw the Frisbee and you're there for like hours. So it's like the, you know, when there's no plans, I feel like sometimes those are when like the core memories are made that you will remember forever. We've just entered the phase and it's a little bit on my mind where I have a couple of older kids that I'd like. and They don't need a job for financial reasons quite yet, but I would like to plant the seed of being somewhat responsible And it's hard to know where that lands and how far to push them. So with my oldest in particular, who's 16, you know, I don't think she can get a job just because she's not around enough. But I also want to sort of, I don't want her just to be sitting around like doing her two weeks of camp and then nothing else. So that's, yeah that's factoring in a little bit too, is like, how can I,
00:30:09
Speaker
get her involved and maybe it's volunteer work, but that's, let's be honest, I'll have to find something for her because you know, how would she know? So that's, that's another layer of our summer now that my kids are a little bit older.
00:30:21
Speaker
Yeah, no, you're right, Charlotte. I did make a note of that too, because my oldest is 15 and we've been at different places where they're like, oh, she can work here when she turns this or the snack bar, or there's like a town camp. But yeah, she has to be a certain age to get paid. And then, yeah, we're kind of at that in-between stage where babysitting is obviously always a go-to.
00:30:45
Speaker
So they do to a two of my girls do that, which is, which is good. Cause you're not just going to sit on your phone and say, I'm bored after camp. You know, we have our kids, obviously we are not, we're not there yet, but we have neighbors who have high school age children. And I don't know, obviously exactly how the dynamic works over there, but they have told us that if one of the kids doesn't have a job or like a volunteer opportunity that week, then it's their job to mow the lawn.
00:31:12
Speaker
And they just have this like push pretty big lawn and like a push mower. So I feel like it's the motivation to get something or you're the one out there. And we've seen each of the children mowing the lawn at some point. So that's funny. We have, I have a couple of kids that will happily do that. My oldest will not. I've encouraged her to just take the little dog to the end of the street. And that counts for me.
00:31:32
Speaker
yeah We're hoping, I'm hoping that she will put together like two hours of just like crafty activities and maybe a read aloud. There's, there's a handful of like five and under kids on our block.
00:31:45
Speaker
And all of those moms have said anecdotally that, especially in the afternoons when their morning camps are over, they would love a couple of hours to kill. Yeah. That said, i like, I don't want to run the camp and I don't want to tell her how to run it. So it's like that fine line between she's indicated she's interested, but because she's not home with us, it's hard to get her involved because she's doing schoolwork and stuff. But that, I think she could manage that. And like one day a week to do a couple, like that's all I need.
00:32:15
Speaker
Yeah. but yeah like Or dog walker or neighbor asked if when the kids are home this summer, if they want to walk their dog. Yeah, that's a good don't One of my, one of Oliver's friends got like a car washing kit. i don't know what that means. It's probably like a brush and a chamois.
00:32:29
Speaker
And they would just go door to door and be like, you want us to wash your car? So that, we'll get there. But that's, that's what's on my mind this summer more than it was last summer is How can I get them being a little more productive in that regard?
00:32:42
Speaker
Something that i thought about, I feel like i just a little earlier when we were talking about all the activities with the kids. And I feel like a lot of us, we have like this pressure because we're like, this is our our kids' childhood, right? We're like crafting this childhood for them.
00:32:57
Speaker
But sometimes I'm like, this is also like my motherhood.
Avoiding Summer Burnout
00:33:01
Speaker
And I remember like when I think back for last summer, like one of my favorite memories from last summer as a family is that we have this little um ice cream place. Megan knows, but I'm not going to say it because I don't want to give away exactly where we live.
00:33:11
Speaker
But this little ice cream place. And like I remember a couple of nights after dinner and we surprised the kids and we're like, we're going to go to ice cream, which for my kids is like a big thing. We don't go out right after dinner like we have little kids and go out and get ice cream.
00:33:22
Speaker
And so I think about that, too. I'm like, it is their childhood. And obviously, i want to craft a nice childhood for them. But it's my motherhood and like my memories raising my children, too. So I feel like I don't want to spend the whole time just lugging them around to different camps and activities, too.
00:33:36
Speaker
So I don't know that gives anybody else permission out there to think about that. That goes along with the idea of, you know, we all talk about this heavy mental load that we carry. Well, there's the burnout that comes along with over planning and over scheduling or just planning and scheduling in general.
00:33:53
Speaker
And so as we're preparing for summer and you have your bucket list and your camp schedule and your babysitting and your time off from work is this week. And there's so much that it's you know, then you're just burnt out. And how are you going to even enjoy all these moments when you're just trying to figure out where you're going next?
00:34:15
Speaker
You have to put your air mask on first, Caitlin. First. Always. It's, it's, I think it's hard for a lot of parents who see or talk to other parents better that say, you know, oh what are you guys doing this week? Oh, well, I'm going into the city and we're gonna check out the slime museum and then we're gonna go to Central Park and the next week we're gonna go to another city and that just makes me hot and tired and I don't wanna do any of that.
00:34:42
Speaker
I wanna set up the sprinkler in my backyard and let my kids just ruin the lawn. yeah And that makes me happy. One of the things on Martha's list, I didn't know what it was. It's called like trash bagging or something.
00:34:57
Speaker
And so what it means is when it's rainy out, you know, this man, they put on trash bags, they just cover themselves with soap and they just go sliding around. we don't want to do it. We did that in college. Actually, there was a hurricane that came through Tennessee and we had a hurricane party and everyone had trash bags and Dawn soap and just went crazy down the hill. So,
00:35:17
Speaker
There go. I'd be interested. Some environmentalist somewhere is like, don't put Dawn dish soap out in the grass. 100%. Dawn kills weeds, so it kind of can help your lawn.
00:35:28
Speaker
but But it also cleans all the oil off of those poor little ducks. That's true. Yes. So if you're listening to this and feeling like you are in the you're not one of us and you start it you've overplanned,
00:35:45
Speaker
You know, personal advice right here, just maybe erase half of that calendar and leave some blank spots. back out of the room Yeah. Which I feel like if you're somebody who is a planner, that can feel really scary to some people. I mean, if you're used to planning all your time with your kids and then to be like, what do you mean? We're just supposed to be home all week with nothing to do. I mean, not to some parents that are used to planning, but I i can assure you that it once you do it, it's not
Nostalgic Summer Activities
00:36:11
Speaker
so It'll work out. Yeah. yeah um That's me, Callie. I feel like even with you know the summer and also when it's not summer with the weekends, I sometimes over plan.
00:36:20
Speaker
And then when they don't have something, it's like, what do what are we even going to do? like and I'm like, well, there's plenty of things in you know the home that you could play with crafts or maybe go walk to you know the your friend's house or, yeah just be a kid. But it's true. so like sometimes And it's good for them to do that too.
00:36:42
Speaker
The slow summer days are really important for the kids to learn to be bored and find stuff to do. And, yeah. I mean, i my childhood, other than the one or two trips that we may go on.
00:36:56
Speaker
My mom worked and I think my aunt babysat me and my dad was working and hung out with my cousins and maybe we swam in a pool. Maybe we went to the beach, but there
Managing Summer Stress with Michelle Grosser
00:37:09
Speaker
wasn't, there were no day trips.
00:37:11
Speaker
There were no, you know, we didn't do a lot. One thing I will say that I would like to do this summer I want to go to the drive-in. I've been saying it every summer and I never get there.
00:37:23
Speaker
I feel like Arbor maybe finally can go to a drive-in if there's ah good movie playing, but Southington has a drive-in, which is really close to me. And they always have such a great movie list. And that's, I do remember doing that as a kid and it was always really cool.
00:37:39
Speaker
I went to that one as a kid, Caitlin. It's the best. yeah I feel like that you're picking that for you, not for your kids. Right. I mean, that's what we want to enjoy. Yeah. It's my mom's summer moment. Yeah. That's right.
00:37:50
Speaker
And if they don't like it, oh, well you enjoy it. Yeah. Like Charlotte, just make them sit there and watch the movie. We're going to actually take a quick break and talk to a guest and then we're going to come back and I have a quick question for everybody about summer.
00:38:12
Speaker
Today on the show, we're joined by someone who just gets what it's like to be a mom trying to do all the things, especially in the chaos of summer. Michelle Grosser is a certified trauma-informed life coach, nervous system expert, host of Alive and Well podcast, formerly known as the Calm Mom podcast, and mom of two.
00:38:30
Speaker
She helps women move from burnout and overwhelm into peace and purpose. And she does it in a way that's both deeply practical and totally approachable. Thank you so much for being here, Michelle. I'm really excited. your podcast.
00:38:42
Speaker
I don't think I could have found it at a better time in my life because I am the queen of being overstimulated and overwhelmed. This episode is about just having the perfect summer and the stress that moms feel from all different areas of having the perfect summer.
00:38:59
Speaker
And Perhaps you have felt it before. Maybe you still feel it now, even though you're so in tune with trying to avoid all of that. But i would, first of all, I guess, like to know, have you ever felt this way before?
00:39:15
Speaker
And why do you think moms feel this intense obligation to maximize summer with their children? Yeah, I've definitely felt it. I feel it.
00:39:26
Speaker
And even this year, like we we moved last summer from Miami to Houston. And with the whole move and everything, we we got here after the school year had started. and um So long story short, we decided to homeschool for a year and try it out.
00:39:40
Speaker
So that like I've been with my kids all year long. So like transitioning to summer is different. We've never done it like this before. And I still feel this like weird pressure to do it. Even though nothing really has changed in our day to day.
00:39:54
Speaker
um So yeah, I felt it when they were going to school Monday through Friday and then home for the summer. I felt it when they were doing summer camps, when they weren't doing summer camps. And then I still feel it now.
00:40:05
Speaker
And I think there's a few reasons why I think that comes up. You know, I think one of the things is that, especially with summer and with time, right? I think a lot of times when we talk about having a scarcity mindset, we're usually talking about like finances or money or, you know, abundance in that sense. But I think so often and I catch myself.
00:40:27
Speaker
It's funny because every month I put a new screensaver on my phone. And this month I just had this like beautiful picture and all it says is there is plenty. I think we can get in this scarcity mindset about time, right? It's like, ah, only have like eight weeks or 10 weeks with my kids and we're going to all this stuff. And like, I have all these plans and I don't want this to pass. And then school starts again and we didn't do all the things and make all the memories. And we can find ourselves really getting stuck in this scarcity mindset around time or memories or whatever it is when there's when there's plenty.
00:41:01
Speaker
So that kind of drives some of it. And then I think, you know, all the things, comparison, right? yeah Everyone, you go on Instagram, everyone's showing their perfect beach vacation and what they're doing before and you know what I'm like ah like, that's great. And I only post mine too. So I get it. like um oh No one sees on Tuesday when everyone's in their pajamas at noon and and we're I'm like trying to get work done and my kids are just watching TV.
00:41:22
Speaker
But that's real too. So I think those are probably two of the biggest drivers. And I think we also put a lot of pressure on ourselves to make sure that our kids have ah happy, memorable, joyful summer. So that's a lot of weight to carry also to try to be that like thermostat all summer long and make sure everyone's good, you know, when that's not necessarily how real life works.
00:41:49
Speaker
Yeah. i I love that screensaver. You just said, I need to get one of these for myself. And you just, you said that's a huge weight to carry is I'm responsible for their amazing summer.
00:42:03
Speaker
And I think a lot of moms totally can feel that. I envy the mom who says, well, I'm not, you know, I totally am not responsible. You guys figure out on your own. But, you know, it's it's it's very hard.
00:42:17
Speaker
What are some subtle signs a mom could ignore that their nervous system is overloaded during summer, during this heavy time where you're just trying to do it all,
00:42:31
Speaker
And what's a simple first step to reset? Okay, so good. So generally when we're starting to feel dysregulated in our nervous system, our body will communicate that to us.
00:42:43
Speaker
So it's always sending these, we call them somatic cues, always kind of sending messages to us. One, we're usually just running at the speed of life and we don't even notice, right? What our body is saying.
00:42:56
Speaker
We'll notice like, oh man, like I have this pain in my neck or this tension in my shoulders, but I've had it. Forever, right? And we just kind of keep going. Or i think culturally, we're just so conditioned to like kill the messenger, frankly, instead of listen to the message and we'll pop an Advil or we'll, you know, push through it or what have you instead of stopping to listen.
00:43:15
Speaker
So I think some of the somatic cues that our body will tell us like, hey, something's going on here, is it might look like it might look like muscle ah chronic muscle tension, aches and pains.
00:43:26
Speaker
It might look like a lot of women will tend to clench their jaw. So if you're someone who tends to wake up in the morning. That's me. Yeah, me too. jaw is clenched or even you're listening right now and your tongue is pressed to the roof of your mouth that could be a somatic cue maybe it's gut issues maybe it's maybe you've had chronic autoimmune conditions that can kind of show up ah migraines headaches all these different physical symptoms but then there are also like emotional and mental symptoms that were becoming dysregulated so
00:43:57
Speaker
Maybe for you, especially over the summer, kids home all the time or just a different you know pace and schedule, um maybe you notice that you're becoming overstimulated really easily, right? yeah Like maybe midday and you're like, ah, everyone like dim the lights, turn off all the noises, stop asking me questions, right? And just feeling like there's too much coming at you. That's a really common sign we're dysregulated.
00:44:21
Speaker
um Even just like an irritability or an edginess, like you find yourself kind of short or snappy. And it's not anything in particular, It's just like the day to day, but your bandwidth is just kind of shrunk because of everything that's going on. So it's kind of easier for you to get to that place where it feels like too much and you're feeling a little snappy. You're kind of simmering. Those are all signs, I think pretty common during the summer. Yeah. Do you have any advice on how you could reset?
00:44:49
Speaker
You're in that state of chaos. You're feeling all of that, you know, it's almost, you just suddenly have this awareness that I'm, I'm not my best self right now.
00:44:59
Speaker
Yep. Do you have any tips on how to reset? For sure. So I think that awareness, like you just said, is the first part, right? Just noticing like, whoa, so i need to i need something I need something right now, right? Something something doesn't feel right.
00:45:10
Speaker
um And then i guess a little part of it is just understanding how our nervous system works. So when we study the nerves in our body and the ways in which they send messages, only 20% of the nerves in our body send messages from our brain down to our body.
00:45:27
Speaker
So things like mindset affirmations, right? Just like trying to talk ourselves down helpful, but again, only the 20% percent of what's going on in your body. The other 80% is that your body is sending messages up to your brain.
00:45:43
Speaker
So if your body feels really tense, if your body is, you know, if your breathing is really shallow and quick, if you're um clenching, you know, your fists, or if you're Heart rate is up.
00:45:53
Speaker
All of those signals from your body are sending messages up to your brain, 80% of that messaging, saying, hey, something's going on here. we're ah right we're We're under stress or something threatening is happening and we feel dysregulated.
00:46:06
Speaker
So we want to have... body-based tools to help us to reset. It's not so much like telling yourself to calm down or get together, right? Like that that doesn't work.
00:46:17
Speaker
No. We have to get into our body and our body doesn't understand words. It just doesn't communicate in a verbal language. So we have to communicate, hey, we're okay, stand down, right, to our body in
Presence Over Planning in Parenting
00:46:30
Speaker
a way that it understands. So that's through movement, temperature,
00:46:35
Speaker
sound touch that feels really soothing and calming. So breath. ah So you want to have tools like that. So, I mean, summertime is such a great time, like get outside, get in water, right?
00:46:48
Speaker
Whether that's like jumping in a pool or water balloons or throwing your kids in the bathtub, like water for even for yourself, taking a bath or a shower can be really soothing, going to the beach, you know, focusing on some breath work, some really simple breath work. My favorite one to reset takes like 15 seconds, but it's called a physiological sigh. You can do this anywhere.
00:47:10
Speaker
And the way that it works is you breathe in through your nose until it feels like your lungs are full. So, and then right at the top, you do one more quick breath and then out through your mouth really slow.
00:47:22
Speaker
Yeah. Let's try it together one more time. So in through your nose at the top, one more quick sip. Yep. And out through your mouth.
00:47:34
Speaker
And that, you feel it? Yeah. I need to do this more often in my normal everyday life. Yes. And I do because it's so effective and it's so quick. And I'll even tell my kids like, all right, everyone stop. 30 seconds. Everyone breathe. And then they'll do exactly that.
00:47:51
Speaker
Such a quick reset. um And then another thing that I really like for the summer, especially too, is that our vagus nerve, which is our body's like primary calming mechanism runs from our brainstem down through right both sides of our neck to all of our major organs.
00:48:07
Speaker
And we can activate it through temperature. So like, man, if you're feeling yourself getting activated, i go to my freezer, I grab a bag of frozen, whatever I have fruit, vegetables, and I'll just hold it on the back of my neck while I breathe for like 20 seconds, 30 seconds. And just that it does the same thing. It's like, it's a reset and then it's okay.
00:48:27
Speaker
um But yeah, so the big, I guess, picture thing is like, get out of your head, stop thinking about it, guilt tripping yourself, right? Letting the stories go and get into your body. Dance party, right? That's probably one of the best things you can do. Shake it out, put on some music, everybody wiggle around. And I promise you in what, a minute and a half, two minutes,
00:48:46
Speaker
all like The whole energy will have shifted. And that's because your nervous system has responded and has shifted state. I love i love that. So I just have one more question for you.
00:48:58
Speaker
You've mentioned on your podcast how expectations lead to burnout. So there's the whole internet thing that I have actually mocked myself about. Moms only have 18 summers with their children.
00:49:10
Speaker
What would you say to a mom who feels like she's already messing up her summer by week two? Yeah, that's so good. And this is something that I remind myself of lot too, especially like homeschooling was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life this year. I'm like, I went to law school. I passed the Florida law. I've done some hard things. that It was the hardest thing.
00:49:32
Speaker
And I think it relates a lot to summer because I, in my mind, had like, I'm going to plan all these beautiful excursions and crafts and it's good if we're going to sit on the couch and have tea time and read books together. And it's like, no, that's not how it was happening at all.
00:49:45
Speaker
And I had to keep reminding myself that to my kids and they're six and eight, my and even whatever age your kids are, um my presence is more powerful than my plans.
00:49:58
Speaker
And I would tell myself that every time I felt like I had planned something and I was disappointed by how it had turned out, or I hadn't planned something and I had wanted to plan something, and it's just so true.
00:50:09
Speaker
right My kids, like even if I think back to the summers I had with my family, it's like I don't really remember the things that we did, but I do remember, I don't know, making s'mores on the grill. And just like my parents being around or the conversations that we had or just like snuggling in a rainstorm and reading books together, like the moments where I had their undivided attention and their presence.
00:50:35
Speaker
And you know I do a lot of work with moms and women around control. And when it comes to control, it's so interesting because as human beings, we're wired, all of us, fundamental need first and foremost for safety.
00:50:49
Speaker
And then second, we're wired for love, acceptance, and approval. And when we feel like either of those is lacking subconsciously, we resort to control and try to control things.
00:51:00
Speaker
Ah, I'm not safe. Or ah, I'm going to be like not loved and rejected. I'm going to try to control everything. And I say that to say that ultimately, if you think about, like and I do this with my clients, if you go through the the first 25 years of your life in like five-year increments and bring up your best memory, it's always a time where you felt really secure and really loved.
00:51:23
Speaker
And the inverse is also true. Your worst memory isn't like, you know, mom forgot to bring us to the beach all summer. It's a time where you felt unsafe or unloved. And so like, I just remind myself of that. i'm like, man, if my kids feel really safe and really loved today and have moments of my undivided attention,
00:51:42
Speaker
That's it. It's like they're going remember that. It's all that they need. So yes, we're going to plan some stuff and it's going to be fun and we're going to do some things. But just, you know, questioning the narrative, only 18 summers. Is that true? No, of course it's not true.
00:51:58
Speaker
No. And reminding myself of what is true. Can I be present with them for a block today and and make some memories that way without any plan needed? That's really what they need and that's really what's going to make them memory.
00:52:10
Speaker
I I love everything you have said. Thank you so much for joining us. You are amazing. And i feel calmer talking to you right now. Oh, what a gift. Thank you so much for having me. it was such a joy. You make it
Favorite Summer Movies and Social Engagement
00:52:25
Speaker
so easy. So good.
00:52:28
Speaker
Favorite summer movie. I asked this last year to you guys. And I remember everyone was kind of like, huh. So it doesn't have to, just a movie that makes you think of summer.
00:52:43
Speaker
Something from either your childhood or now. I mean, Dazed and Confused is the first one that came to mind right now. Also that movie Summer Catch with Jessica Biel. Oh, yes, Charlotte. Frankie, what's his face? Yeah.
00:52:56
Speaker
Mine is um The Great Outdoors, Jaws, The Goonies.
00:53:02
Speaker
i I'm having a- Sandlot. Sandlot, Now and Then.
00:53:11
Speaker
i thought I had a third. Sandlot and Now and Then. um What is that one? Beverly Hills Troop. Troop Beverly Hills. Yes. I just remember always watching it with my cousins and then like we would try to be them and like go outside in the yard and like try to like get worms out of the grass. Like, you know, because they like did all that. Yeah.
00:53:30
Speaker
That one is the only one that really I feel like. Well, you guys should come on and, you know, come see us on social media and tell us your favorite summer movie. Maybe we can come up with a list for people because I feel like everybody always, you know, then you can have your own little movie night
Personal Highs and Lows
00:53:49
Speaker
with your family. Or for those rainy days when the kids are whining, right? Yeah.
00:53:53
Speaker
yeah Low key. So we are closing out our episode with some pits and peaks. Does anyone have anything that they'd like to share? I'll do my peek is that our patio is finally done. When we moved into this house, it's just like a lawn. Like there's nothing, not not even a nice lawn, just dirt kind of.
00:54:16
Speaker
So that was one of mine. I was like, I need a place just to like put a chair. And I didn't realize how extensive putting in a patio. We also had to bury pro paintings, but like, I didn't realize how much digging and gravel and rock. Like I thought that it was like a week and they put in a patio and It was not.
00:54:32
Speaker
So it's finally done. And that is wonderful. So I have somewhere to put it. I don't own really any patio furniture. So it's like a camping chair, but it works. Charlotte. furniture is so expensive.
00:54:45
Speaker
I haven't done it yet, but it's been a while since I've had an opportunity to do like a design project just because I don't know, our house isn't enormous and I've done all the spaces, but our sunroom has two sort of seating areas. One is a table and chairs and that's going to stay and it's fine and we use it. And the other is like a coffee table and there's four chairs around it. And in theory, they're great, but they're always like cockeyed or crooked or like pulling the rug back. So like in essence, it works, but in reality, it's just, I'm always shifting them.
00:55:17
Speaker
And so I'm going to try something new I'm going to bring in like a love seat, a couple of chairs. i'm going to build I found a coffee tape or like a wooden bench on Facebook Marketplace that was perfect, but he sold it.
00:55:28
Speaker
But I took a screen grab of the listings when tried to make it. And there's nothing that makes me more excited than like trying to pull together a little space. So it hasn't happened, but I've ordered a couple of things and don't know, just makes me happy.
00:55:41
Speaker
I love that. Well, I have a peek and that's, we finally got our broken fridge out of our unfinished side of our basement. That's been broken for nine months. And was taking up way too much space when there's not enough space at all.
00:55:55
Speaker
And I found a guy who brought two of his friends and loved, it was 360 pounds. He said 360 pound fridge out of our basement. Feels so good.
00:56:06
Speaker
So good. Megan, what about you? Okay. So I have a pit and you know how I like to try all the the fun stuff on social media, like the lip stain and all that great stuff. So have you seen the viral ice cream that you can make in the dryer? In your like dryer? No.
00:56:24
Speaker
So I got it and I tried it and It didn't really work for us. Maybe I did it wrong, the ingredients, but like, you know me. i Wait, isn't a dryer hot? Yeah, that's, I just, the math math. So you like, all the ingredients you prepare on your your counter in your kitchen, and then you set it through the dryer for a certain amount of time. In what?
00:56:45
Speaker
In a like sealed, it's like a sealed like packet. Yeah. Is there a dryier heat setting on the dryer? Like I get that you're going for the agitation. Is there a setting on your dryer with no heat? There must be. You can turn it way down. Yes. Tumble dry. So I can like if you next time if, you know, you want me to like with a leather jacket, I could bring the product next time.
00:57:10
Speaker
I think on this one, Megan, we're good. Okay. i think So don't order the viral ice cream that you can make in the dryer all that I'm saying, okay? It did not – yeah, it was in like a sealed, almost like a microwave safe like type of packet thing. What if it exploded? It would ruin your dryer.
00:57:29
Speaker
i mean, yeah, it probably would have. It had like a zipper, but yeah. This is just one of those things to me where it's like, you know when you see like the life hacks – And you're just like, that's eight times harder than just doing it the way that it should be done. Convenient illusion. Isn't that what you called it?
00:57:43
Speaker
That is what I call it. Or like, yeah, Callie, labeling like the carrots. No, the carrots you just go in. They're going to stay in the carrot bag from the market. They're not going to be labeled.
00:57:56
Speaker
But Megan, that's why we like you because trying to rid them. know. you know, and I feel like it's like a pressure. I got to like, you know, keep this cool stuff going. And I'm going to, so get ready. I just want to be on Megan's TikTok or wherever you're getting. She'll be like, you know that viral? And it's like, never. Never heard it.
00:58:13
Speaker
No, and she's not, you've not brought anything that we want yet. know. Oh, yeah. Maybe we can start making you a list. Of the things we want you to test. You're right. You're right. Yeah. Or like the, the, um, before you go to bed at night, the lip mask, the lip mask. And I was like, I don't really love mine, but there's like a better one. And that's my pet.
00:58:35
Speaker
today Well, I was frustrating for, for two seconds. I thought I was going to, um, show you guys what I think I'm going wear in my dance recital because I needed to show someone my nineties grunge.
00:58:49
Speaker
costume that I made up, but the stuff didn't come. And then I remember nobody might watch this. And so
Conclusion and Summer Wishes
00:58:55
Speaker
instead, I told you about the fridge. Put it on social. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, we'll share it.
00:58:59
Speaker
well All right. Well, thank you for listening. Stop trying to have a perfect summer and just, you know, relax. Go have an okay summer, guys. Just have an okay-ish summer. Put some ice cream in your dryer and just have a mediocre summer. If you are bored, order the ice cream you can make in the dryer. At least it'll be a fail and everyone will laugh and they'll remember it forever. Can you imagine it in the lint trap?
00:59:23
Speaker
oh Oh, that's all I just kept picturing was the milk, hot milk. how i've tried written down the words to say it is time i've been waiting five days to explain you make me feel inside baby