Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Clarity begins with this
20 Plays2 years ago
In this episode Heather talks about 3 things that really help you gain and have clarity Mentally and Emotionally.
Show notes:
Learn more about MER so you can release the story of your past and create your desired future.
Listen to episode 02 so you can find opportunities in darkness
** Music by Mixlund studios - Brighter Days Ahead
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to 'Sex and Motherhood' Podcast
00:00:02
Speaker
Hey sister friend, it's Heather Georgel, your certified life and NLP practitioner. And here we make doing the inner work not suck by talking about all things motherhood, womenhood, sex, and everything in between. Are you ready? Let's talk. This is the sex and motherhood podcast.
Understanding Different Types of Emotions
00:00:25
Speaker
Let's talk about emotions. Emotions?
00:00:29
Speaker
are part of life. We have happy emotions, we have neutral emotions, we have negative, unhelpful emotions. And sometimes being able to gain clarity around those emotions can feel impossible. It can feel overwhelming. It can feel like you just don't want to create any time to feel them. And that's okay.
00:00:55
Speaker
It is normal to not want to feel them. But I want to encourage you to create time and to create the space to feel what you feel and to allow yourself a little bit of grace as well.
00:01:10
Speaker
Now I've been thinking a lot about emotions and I kind of, you know, woke up this morning not quite knowing what it is that I really wanted to share. And it's been a struggle. A lot of things have been going through my mind and I've started and stopped multiple times. And I, I really believe that having emotions when you're able to identify them, when you're able to give them a name and you,
00:01:40
Speaker
Allow yourself to feel them that you really gain clarity for yourself. You really are able to flourish for yourself. And it's the same with having mental clarity because our emotions and thoughts are such a combination. You know, even the events or the circumstances that are happening around you, they are all connected.
00:02:09
Speaker
and being able to allow yourself time to navigate or to make a change, to allow yourself space to create an environment that you are able to process, and then to allow yourself grace
00:02:27
Speaker
for not meeting a certain expectation that you've set for yourself or someone else's and to receive grace into your life that you do not need to be perfect. You only need to be you. And when you don't allow yourself
00:02:46
Speaker
the time and the space and the grace that you need, you're doing yourself a disservice. It's kind of like, you know, I was gardening with my dad this year and we were going to plant some watermelons and some pumpkins and lots of other things, but I was researching while we were planting of what things can go together and what things should not go together and
00:03:07
Speaker
It was interesting for me to find out someone that is not, you know, a garden expert. It does not really have a green thumb to find out that watermelons and pumpkins don't go together. Maybe you already knew this. Maybe, you know, you're like, well, duh. But I didn't, I didn't know that. See, because I know that they both need, you know, space to grow, but who cares if the vines interchange? But what this ends up doing is when you plant pumpkins and watermelons together,
00:03:35
Speaker
they can stunt each other's growth and there's no space for it to really thrive and to grow and to flourish because you're planting it in the wrong environment where there's no space which means you're robbed of time. There is no time to try and give
00:03:58
Speaker
the watermelon and the pumpkins, the water that they need, when you've planted them together to where you gave them a space that will not help them flourish, that the outcome is going to be unhelpful. You're not going to get watermelons and you're not going to get pumpkins. And it's the same in your life when you're not allowing yourself the time and the space that you need to implement a change or to remove yourself from a relationship that isn't working to
00:04:27
Speaker
decide for yourself what is good and what isn't working. And being able to create this time and this space and to allow yourself the grace is what really gives you mental and emotional clarity in all aspects of your life.
Emotions as Catalysts for Growth
00:04:46
Speaker
Now, to speak of emotions, we have three different types. We have positive, we love positive emotions. We have the happy feelings,
00:04:54
Speaker
We have the joyful feelings. We have the excitement feelings. I mean, when you think of your first kiss, I'm sure it was a little exciting. Oh my goodness, it was the first time your lips touch. Or maybe the first time that you found out that you were pregnant. Or maybe the first time that you made a discovery that you didn't know before. Or maybe that you accomplished a task that before you thought that you weren't capable and now you know that you're completely capable and the joy that just engulfs you.
00:05:22
Speaker
or maybe it's your child saying their first words or doing something that you watch them struggle with and you just get all the feels, all those positive feels, right?
00:05:36
Speaker
then you have neutral emotions. Neutral emotions aren't good and they're not bad. It's just neutral, right? Like maybe you're messaging someone on your phone or, you know, on the computer and you're like, yeah, yeah, that was hilarious. Laugh out loud, oh well, but you're not laughing out loud. Or you sound like the emoji that like, ha ha, that was so funny. Or maybe you send, what is it, a gif?
00:06:02
Speaker
and you're like not actually doing what those are showing but mentally and emotionally it's hitting the nail right on the head for you but you're kind of feeling neutral but like yeah it's pretty funny do you see what I'm saying like it's not overly excited oh my gosh or oh my word that's so terrible I feel so bad you're just neutral you're just being and that's a beautiful state to be in
00:06:31
Speaker
then we have those negative emotions. The negative emotions get a terribly, terribly bad rap, right? And it's managing those strong emotions that really helps you have more clarity when you're feeling neutral and when you're feeling positive. We need, you need negative emotions. You need strong emotions.
00:06:56
Speaker
emotions because that's where change starts to come and the reason why is because all emotions and memories experiences are stored in your unconscious and the reason why sometimes it feels that you have way too many negative thoughts or way too many negative emotions is because
00:07:21
Speaker
They may be repressed. It may be a repressed memory, repressed emotions from a situation. I call this the first event, the first time you ever felt angry, or the first time that you ever felt sad, the first time you ever felt fearful, and they tie up into a thought, okay? And when this happens, we don't want to deal with it.
00:07:47
Speaker
We don't want to deal with it. But what's actually happening is your unconscious mind is saying, whoa, I don't want this to take up space anymore. We need resolution around this. So this is going to happen. I'm just going to send this to her and she's going to feel it. And then she's going to have these thoughts, but it's OK because we're ready. We're ready.
00:08:10
Speaker
to navigate through this. We're ready to manage these emotions. We're ready to reevaluate and we're ready to let them go. But we're also human enough to say,
00:08:21
Speaker
I ain't got time for this. I don't have the space for this. This is sensory overload. Why can't I just be better? Why am I not doing enough? Why can't I just do this? And you start to spiral down this rabbit hole of the shoulds, right? Sound familiar? That you're like, I don't want to do it. And I'm always triggered when I see this person. And I'm always triggered for this. And I'm always triggered for that. But really what's happening is you're being presented with an opportunity. An opportunity to make a shift.
00:08:51
Speaker
to allow yourself more grace in your life and to create more space and freedom and clarity by releasing those emotions. And it's when you allow yourself to feel them that you start to make change, that you start by saying, wow, I really feel that. And when I feel angry, I feel it right in the center of my chest.
00:09:20
Speaker
And I don't like this feeling, but why am I feeling this feeling? Okay, my chest is pounding. This is happening. This is what was happening before. Here's the event or the circumstance that's happening. Why am I being triggered? Why am I feeling so angry? Oh.
00:09:36
Speaker
It's because the kids are screaming and I'm trying to concentrate on something else that I feel is important for me and I'm not being present with what's happening in the room around me and I'm feeling angry. Okay, well, is what I'm doing more important than what's happening around me? Sometimes it is and sometimes it's not. This is where you're presented with an opportunity to react or to respond. For some people,
00:10:03
Speaker
myself included, it's much easier to react. Yelling, screaming, being angry, more angry, but that breeds more anger. It breeds more of the emotion. Whereas if you sit with it and allow yourself a little bit of time, you really only need 90 seconds to navigate an emotion.
00:10:21
Speaker
and to investigate the emotion so that you can just lovingly let it go. You're feeling it. You feel it in your body. For some people, they see like a color when they feel a really big emotion. For some people, they feel it physically like me. I feel anger really, really big in my chest. For some people, they get a headache, you know, those tension headaches because you're being presented with opportunities. But when you continue to push them down, you're missing the opportunity.
00:10:50
Speaker
I want you to recognize that you are not your emotions.
Responding to Emotions vs. Reacting
00:10:55
Speaker
Let me say that again. Recognize you are not your emotions. You are not sad. You are not anger. You are not, you are not your emotion. You are feeling sad. You are feeling angry. You are feeling anxious, but you are not your emotion.
00:11:19
Speaker
Okay, there's a big difference. And when you keep your emotions separate, you get to release the judgments that you may have assigned yourself as a result of feeling it. Because you always have a choice. Like I said, you get to react or you get to respond to the emotion. What would you rather do? I want you to realize that you are more than enough, that you are capable of creating
00:11:49
Speaker
time for yourself to navigate your emotions, to navigate your thoughts, to realize that those thoughts and emotions may not even be true. That it's just a story or a virtual reality that you're in right this moment that needs re-evaluation and acknowledge it and allow what you're feeling and then investigate it. Investigate
00:12:15
Speaker
all the things. And when you feel that you've reached some resolution, lovingly let them go. I hear my daughter say all the time, I'm so angry. Now my whole day is ruined. Okay, it's like only eight o'clock in the morning. The whole day is ruined. This is the worst day ever, right? Who doesn't hear that from their kid? It is not the worst day ever. You're having a hard moment. There's a difference from having a moment
00:12:44
Speaker
You can feel angry. Why are you angry? Oh, because my brother did this. And then he did this. Okay, why did he do that? Well, because I was doing this. Oh, well, why did you choose to do that?
00:13:00
Speaker
Well, because I really wanted this and he wasn't playing with me and I got upset. Oh, so you're angry because you don't feel like your brother wanted to play with you. Well, yeah. And then her brother pipes in, I did wanna play with you, but you were bossing me around and I didn't like it, so I didn't want to play. Oh, well, I will try not to be so bossy then. And they're back to playing. Like, and the anger's just gone. Do you see how,
00:13:27
Speaker
There was clarity in that moment because our emotions don't have to ruin the whole day. They don't have to ruin your whole life. They can be but a moment for you to see the light and to reevaluate the direction in which you want to take.
00:13:48
Speaker
Negative emotions are part of life, just like positive and neutral emotions are a part of life. And when you can learn to recognize them, when you can learn to acknowledge and allow yourself to feel them, when you can learn to investigate the thoughts and emotions, you will be able to lovingly let go of them easier than you ever thought possible. If you are continuously triggered, I encourage you
00:14:19
Speaker
to seek help so that you can create a space and the time to receive the grace that you need to move forward and implement change. You can flourish when you decide to receive resolution for yourself around your thoughts and emotions and lovingly let them go.
Exploring Limiting Beliefs
00:14:41
Speaker
It's when you feel resistance to lovingly letting them go that they may be tied
00:14:49
Speaker
to a limiting belief. And a true limiting belief is framed as a negative affirmation. That is a true limiting belief. And to make it even more true, to really be a negative limiting belief, it is ingrained into you before the age of seven. It's even passed down genealogically. And if you believe in past lives, it's even passed down that way.
00:15:17
Speaker
It can happen when you're even in the womb. Your unconscious is always gathering information. It is always storing information. It is always feeling. This is the most exciting part of my job, is being able to see a weight that is lifted when you are able to reevaluate the past in a safe and loving way.
00:15:47
Speaker
that you come out feeling lighter, feeling empowered, and knowing more of your own truth. Choosing a path for your life that feels aligned so that you feel recharged and you release the muck that is keeping you stuck.
00:16:09
Speaker
because it is possible. Just because it happened so long ago and it feels so ingrained in you does not mean that you cannot release it and receive a new resolution. I am here to assist in that. And if you want to talk about it, I encourage you to go to the show notes and really look into what MER is.
Conclusion and Listener Engagement
00:16:33
Speaker
I want you to know that all things are possible through time
00:16:39
Speaker
space and grace. You just finished another episode of the Sex and Motherhood podcast. Thank you so much for listening. Feeling inspired? Go ahead, rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode. I want to hear your biggest takeaway sister friend, so I invite you to skip on over to Instagram and leave a comment about your favorite part at Sex and Motherhood.
00:17:05
Speaker
Be sure to share with your sister friends too. Meet you here next week.