Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Cats of Catthulhu part 1: Clawful Evil
177 Plays4 years ago
We've got a special episode featuring the Roll Players becoming Kitty Cats in a wonderful game called "Cats of Catthulhu." Amy takes the helm as the "Cat Herder" weaving us a "tale" of 3 Kitties dealing with a fur-ocious enemy! Franky Meownez (Adam) struggles with anxiety and home invasions, Mr. Whiskers (Justin) gets his grub on and marks his territory, and Poncho (David) leads the charge into the great unknown.
Follow us on Twitter:
@rollplayerswin @Adam_Sharesalot @TeamCaresalot
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Character Descriptions
00:00:10
Speaker
So,
00:01:08
Speaker
Hello, everyone, and thank you for coming to the Role Players podcast today. I'm in charge today, so we're fucked. My name is Amy. I am our cat Herder. Adam, please introduce your cat.
00:01:22
Speaker
I am Frankie meownes. I am a, uh, an Egyptian Mao short hair with green eyes and gray and black spots all over my body. And I am a judge. I am a competition kitty. Excellent. Justin, you're next. Explain your cat. I am Mr. Whiskers. I'm a street cat. Don't need nothing from nobody. I ate my dinner out of a garbage can.
00:01:50
Speaker
I'm a cat crabat. I jump around better than other cats can. I'm brownish gray with some black stripes and some white underbelly action on my fur. I'm a mixed breed. I'm a mutt. Yeah. I'm slippery. I'm a slippery sweet cat. David, it's your turn. Explain your kitty.
00:02:12
Speaker
Okay, my cats Pancho is his name. He's just a Pancho now. He's a purebred giant Norwegian forest cat. He's got white and gray fur, blue eyes, very healthy teeth. He's a great guy all around.
00:02:27
Speaker
So he's also a house cat and his his cat class or whatever you call it is a two-foot ologist which Means I understand humans and some some forms of apes or something other bipedes creatures
00:02:48
Speaker
So yeah, that's poncho. Great. So if you haven't figured it out yet, we're playing a game that involves cats. Um, we were playing cats of Cthulhu today. Catthulu. Um, and our three little kitties are going to go on a little adventure and just kind of explore the town and get to, get to feeling how to play with their little paws.
Game Introduction: Cats of Cthulhu
00:03:12
Speaker
For the audience, just so you know, the cats are literally just cats. They cannot talk to each other. They have to interact with each other how a normal cat would interact with a different cat. For example, if one of them picks something up, puts a screwdriver in his mouth,
00:03:34
Speaker
that player has to pretend he has a screwdriver or a pencil in his mouth when he's trying to interact with the world around him.
00:03:46
Speaker
Thank you, Justin. Cats of Cthulhu is a d6 roller. On a one or a two, it's considered a failure and it's bad for the cats. This is the same for a monster. If a monster rolls a one or two, it's going to be bad for the cat, not bad for the monster.
00:04:05
Speaker
A three, four, five or six is good for the cats. And so again, if a monster rolls a three, four, five or six, that's a fail for the monster and it's bad for the enemy, but it's good for the cats. Yeah. So this is not a powered by the apocalypse game.
00:04:23
Speaker
And no, it has its own little dice system. And if we were in person, I would have bought the cat dice, which have actual cats on the dice instead of numbers.
Setting the Scene: Village of Discord
00:04:34
Speaker
But we're across the country, so I didn't do that.
00:04:38
Speaker
Occasionally, you may hear real-life cats in the background because there are four of them surrounding us. Two on my side. Sometimes you might hear my roommate, Alan, maybe. Yes, you may also hear Alan while he's screaming because Alan likes to go in the basement and scream sometimes. And he likes to go up the stairs like the opposite of a cat.
00:05:01
Speaker
Hello, Anixia, please sit down. Okay, so- Am I really like to lick my drink when I leave my cup unattended? So that's cool. What a dick. Yeah. Yeah, this is not what I was- Okay, so we are going to start. Uh, today we are going to be in a tiny little town, a little village called Discord. And in this little Discord village- Fucking David, sit down. Is that copyrighted? Are we getting in trouble?
00:05:32
Speaker
Okay, let's call it discount then discount much better. And so in discount, there is a very wealthy family who has a large manor home. They have a servants quarters on their property. And then there's a small village around the wealthy home. That's where I got the good trash from.
00:05:54
Speaker
That's where Mr. Whiskers gets the good trash. Now, Mr. Whiskers actually has free reign of most of the village and most of the area because he's an outdoor feral cat. He doesn't have a family to go home to. Oh, sorry. Sorry, Mr. Whiskers.
00:06:14
Speaker
Anyway, so Mr. Whiskers is very familiar with the lay of the land. He has spent quite a bit of time exploring. He knows the streets, he knows the back alleys, but he also has been to the servant's home on the Manor property. He is aware that there is a cat living there, a very fluffy big cat. They have interacted through a screen
Village Exploration and Cat Antics
00:06:33
Speaker
door before. Occasionally, if Mr. Whiskers is having trouble finding food, the two feats who live in that little servant's house will occasionally give him some food.
00:06:43
Speaker
um and he is also he has familiarity with the grounds of the manor house because mr whiskers goes wherever the fuck mr whiskers wants to go so he has to know that there is a huge house and he's he's he's a little more hesitant with the house because he's been chased away before by the owners with a broom and rich folks and bs people now about frankie munaz he's our show cat who lives in the manor house
00:07:14
Speaker
uh Frankie has his own bedroom in that manor house he it's he's got a soft little pillow that he can sit on he's got all the toys he's got a beautiful window that that seeks that can see the wonderful sunsets and he's got his own little room and Frankie doesn't typically leave that little room unless he has to go to a show otherwise he pretty much hangs out here and observes the town from his window
00:07:43
Speaker
Just listening to classical music. That was not funny. Finally, when we look at Pancho, Pancho lives in the little servant's home. Pancho loves his two foot. He loves everything about his two foot. He understands all of the technology that his two foot has.
00:08:08
Speaker
But he's aware that there is an outside world. He often spends his days napping in front of the windows, or with the screen door open, he will go and feel the breeze on his whiskers. He has occasionally stared down Mr. Whiskers. They've had a few staring contests. They've interacted through a screen door, but they're not very familiar with each other.
00:08:35
Speaker
Now, a few days ago, there was a terrible thunderstorm that just wrecked the countryside. Loud thunder, rain, lightning. Mr. Whiskers did not have the best time during the thunderstorm. Without much shelter, he stayed in a cardboard box that shortly melted throughout the storm. And he got soaked to the bone until eventually he found a safe haven in a trash can.
00:09:03
Speaker
And Frankie Muniz didn't have a great time during the storm either, because surprisingly, while the rain was pounding and the thunder was rumbling, his two feet weren't home. They weren't there to comfort him. He was all alone. He had the feeling that he had been abandoned almost.
00:09:25
Speaker
Pancho had a good time during the storm. His two foot was home. He got to snuggle up and sleep under the blankets with his two foot during the storm. So he had no problems with what was going on because he had his two foot. So it's been a couple of days now and
00:09:44
Speaker
Mr. Whiskers, you had noticed during the storm that a particularly rough part of the storm had focused right on top of the manor house. And you almost, you could have seen something weird, something dark and disastrously about that storm over the manor house. But here you are in the alleys of the village, just snooting around the garbage
00:10:12
Speaker
What are you going to do? The banner house is close by. You could go over there to investigate. It's been bothering you for a couple of days. Or there's a wonderful trash can that's got a wonderful smell coming out of it that smells roughly like tuna and maybe cilantro. Oh, yeah. I'm going to anxiety eat. OK, great. It's one of those trash cans where it's got a lid on it that flips open.
00:10:43
Speaker
It's kind of, so basically it's a full trash can, so the lid is partially open, but you'll have to jump up and get in there. Okay, so I wanna play my cat as like a big asshole, so I'm gonna try and just knock the whole trash can over. You wanna shove it over? Okay. I'm gonna try and jump on it and drag it down. Go ahead and roll 2D6 for me to see how well you shove over the trash can. Let's do it. Yes.
00:11:13
Speaker
I can press the button too, can I? But I didn't do that right. Let me remember how to do this game. There we go. Oh no, one and a five. Okay. Well, don't worry. It was an easy challenge. So you only needed one success. So you back up a little bit. You take a running leap and you just slam yourself into the trash can.
00:11:39
Speaker
Graciously, you're on the cat. Maybe not. I had one fail, so I probably fuck up a little bit.
00:11:44
Speaker
You kind of tripped and stumbled a little bit and kind of headbutted the trash can a little unintentionally. But you did get it and it knocks over and it spills out all these glorious white plastic bags full of trash. One of them spits out some leftover probably three day old fish tacos. That's the good stuff right there. Only three days old. As you drop it down and
00:12:14
Speaker
You're eating. There is a cat in the corner who makes herself known. She pops out a little bit and she's watching you eat. Are you going to let her take a bite? With my face buried in the garbage food, I just go.
00:12:35
Speaker
They don't sound like a cat anymore. You don't have a monster? How are they making a little growl when they're just annoyed and they're like, get the fuck away from me. OK, that's better. That's better. Great. Getting it. So you've finished your lovely taco lunch, and you've made your way over. You're making your way downtown. Oh, wait, you said it was a lady cat? Oh, man, I fucked up.
00:13:00
Speaker
Yeah, it was a lady cat. You scared off the lady cat, Mr. Whiskers. Food's more important than lady cats. I mean, you've run the street for a long time, Mr. Whiskers. You've had your fair share of lady cats until those freaking Humane Society people came around and put you in a cage. And you woke up and you felt a little different after that. Oh, at least they shucked me up. They put your ever-got-on-the-street. Couldn't even give me a nice person. Lady cats haven't really had the same appeal to you ever since that weird day when the Humane Society captured you.
00:13:30
Speaker
I care about his eating and lazing around. Yeah, eating and fighting is all you do. But that house is still concerning you because after that storm, that house is weird. So you're going to make your way downtown to the servant's quarters to see what Poncho is up to. You've seen him before through this green door. He lives closer to the house. Maybe he's seen something. I got to check on my boy Poncho.
00:13:58
Speaker
So Pancho, you are taking a nap in the sunlight on the windowsill. The window is open. You're getting a nice fresh breeze of air and you open your eyes a little bit and there's this fat, grungy, matted, scarred up fat cat sitting on the little cobblestones outside your favorite window. What are you going to do?
00:14:28
Speaker
get my two foots gun and shoot him I'm gonna me out him but then under then you see subtitles and it says
00:14:40
Speaker
Get away, uh, scrub. Great. So, so Mr. Whiskers, you're sitting there waiting for Pancho to wake up and maybe you scratch on the screen a little bit and he groggily opens his eyes and he makes this weird, unhappy, growly yell at you through the screen. What are you going to do? Uh, I'm going to, how close, how close is he laying against the screen?
00:15:11
Speaker
He's probably right in front of the window. I'm going to square up with him. I'm going to pull my paws up in the air. I'm going to do that hesitant thing casting before they whap. And I'm going to whap at the screen where his fur is. Poncho, he's whapping at your screen. What are you going to do? Ignore him? I don't know. But not claws out. And then I'm like twice as nice, right?
00:15:40
Speaker
Yeah, you, you're a very big cat, Pancho. You're probably like a 25 pound cat. All right. I'm just going to stand up and stretch and just walk away. Big stretches, big stretches for Pancho. Well, uh, Mr. Whiskers.
00:15:57
Speaker
What? You came here to try and find an ally to go investigate the spooky house and instead you hit him and he walked away from you. Pancho walks off the podcast. Pancho left the podcast. I'm going to meow longingly after him. Okay. Pancho gets the spray bottle out and sprays Justin or Mr. Whiskers.
00:16:27
Speaker
So, Pancho is currently home alone. His two foot is not here to hear you, Mr. Whiskers. She's not here. You do come occasionally and you yowl and she feeds you, but she's not here to feed you and there's no one here to open the door for you to get in to see Pancho. Okay. I'm just gonna keep screaming at Pancho then. Do I know a way out?
00:16:51
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, you're you're a two footologist. You know how to open the doors. You know how to open the screen doors. I mean, you can identify the difference between car keys and house keys. You know how locks work. You know all this shit. Oh, dude, I'm smart. Yeah. All right. Well, I'm going to start walking at two feet and doing algebra or something and like I'm going to. I mean, how big am I, right? Like I can't reach like a doorknob, right?
00:17:21
Speaker
How do you open the fucking door? You've got like super leaping ability, probably your cat. Yeah, I mean, you're a cat. Yeah, but I can't. The door is right next to the kitchen counter. You could, you know, use that to your advantage. Oh, okay. All right. Uh, yeah, some of them have like thumbs, right? Let's see, all these doors are lever doors. You just hang off it. Oh, it's like a fire escape or like, yeah, okay.
00:17:53
Speaker
You have those Huh you have those in your house your screen doors just a handle. Oh All right. Well, I guess I'll get on the counter and then open the door for mr.
Character Interactions and Relationships
00:18:08
Speaker
Whiskers. Oh
00:18:09
Speaker
I want you to roll to see how well you get on the counter and if you can figure out the door or not. Oh, yes. Very good. Yeah. You jump up there gracefully. Even though you're a two-footologist, you have, you must have cat-ro-bat genes in your blood because you are so graceful jumping up there. And Mr. Whisker sees you and gets a little jealous of your skills.
00:18:38
Speaker
but you you paw at that door and it click opens and swings open and it actually hits mr whiskers in the face a little bit because he didn't get outside and then I think it's the door to shut it you don't want bugs like mr whiskers there's a bug or the bug you do notice there's a beetle mr whiskers
00:19:06
Speaker
crawling around in the front yard of Pancho's house. Oh, start the role to not be distracted by it? Because I got business to attend to. But I really want to get that bug. Yeah. Let's see you roll. Roll to see how well you get distracted or not distracted by the beetle. Oh, I don't. I fucking know. I don't need that bug right now. Six and four. Yeah, you don't need that fucking bug. You just had those delicious fish tacos. What? Fuck you, bug. So the two of you here are standing in the courtyard
00:19:35
Speaker
of Pancho's house, his little servant's quarters that he lives in with his two foot. And as Pancho gets outside and closes the door and clicks it back shut, there's a loud rumble of thunder over the manor house again. And it's weird because it's a sunny day. The sun is shining, there's a nice breeze, there's no clouds in the sky, but that manor house is rumbling up a storm.
00:20:05
Speaker
What are the two of you gonna do? I'm gonna walk to the edge of the house and look towards the bigger house and look back at Pancho. I'm gonna get out my smartphone and check the weather forecast. Uh-huh, lovely. I'm gonna stop doing that. Check your weather bug. Yeah, yes, brother. Bug, where? Who said bug? I don't know. Can I cast spells or anything?
00:20:35
Speaker
Nope, you're just a cat. All right. Well, Mr. Whiskers is looking at the house and looking back at you and his tail is swishing a little bit. How do cats roll their eyes? What do they do when they want to roll their eyes? Do they like flick their tail or something? They just glare and judgmentally. They just upturn their nose and. Sort of. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do the eyes a little bit. They do that thing where they bite down thoroughly and their tongue still sticking out of their mouth. I'm just going to go. I'm just going to start walking up there.
00:21:05
Speaker
Okay, so the two of you start making your way up the little grassy hill towards the manor house. Now, Frankie, you're in the house, your special room, your Frankie room is in the attic, but you have windows that basically allows you to get a full 360 view of everything around the house.
00:21:27
Speaker
And you know, yeah, yeah. The attic covers the whole top floor of the house. So you have, I have a, I have a bad ass house, bitch. I mean, you're a fucking show cat. This is your room, buddy. Man. I got a two foot. I got a, I got a bed. That's a size that two foots usually sleep. Yeah. Yeah, you do. You got all the toys you can think of. You've got a bed up there. You've got this wonderful feeder that distributes this amazing food.
00:21:54
Speaker
You know your two foot scans my retinas it that way it only feeds me in case other cat gets it Your two foots will come in every evening and give you a hand-cooked dinner that they made for you Although they haven't been doing that lately You know that they were gone when the storm hit and they haven't come home yet You've been kind of just living off the dry food out of the kibble dispenser for now
00:22:18
Speaker
Um, but you're sitting there enjoying making, you know, having a cat bath, doing, doing your thing. And you notice some movement out of one of the windows towards the servant's house. And you see these two cats coming up the lawn towards your house and you've never really left your room. You don't really know what the rest of your house looks like. Um, I mean, why do I, I don't have to, I have, I have surveillance. Right. This is your room. This is.
00:22:47
Speaker
So you see these two cats, one super big fluffy gray and white behemoth, and then this really fat chunky beat up. All right, let's not roll up here. We're overdoing my gross AMD, so please. You're a feral cat. Not all that gross.
00:23:06
Speaker
He's a bit chunky, and his hair's a little matted in certain places, but he's got muscles in the front, and he's a thick boy. But you see these two coming towards your house. What the hell are these guys doing coming towards your house? Well, Frankie Meones does... First of all, he's not happy that anybody's even coming close. That's not his two feet. His two foot. One two foot? Two foot? Or two feet? So you have two two-feet.
00:23:36
Speaker
Two feet. You have two two-foots. Pancho has one two-foot. Okay, gotcha. Well, he thinks this is very clawful and he's like pacing back and forth. He's kind of walking back and forth and he's very anxious. He said it's been a few days since his two feet have been home, right? Mm-hmm, yeah. He only just recently crawled out from underneath the mattress after the storm hit the first time.
00:24:05
Speaker
Uh, he has very bad cat anxiety right now. Um, and, uh, I would say that Frankie pro like gets to the window. That's closest to where these, these, these cat nerds are coming in. And, uh, he likes, you know, I don't know. I think he pushes a button that, but, um, you know, we're the speakers. He can talk to cats outside intercom system. He pushes the button. He goes, no.
00:24:33
Speaker
No. No. So Frankie thinks this button leads outside, but really this is just a call button for his two feet to come in and feed him. And he, he's just, he's always known when he presses this button, somebody comes to feed him. So he's pressing this button and nobody's coming. And these cats keep coming closer and closer to his house. And then all of a sudden a car pulls up in front of the house.
00:25:01
Speaker
And Frankie, you recognize the car. This car belongs to your two feet. Oh, man. I get really excited. I run back and forth. Pancho, you and Mr. Whiskers are outside. And this car comes ricin' up and comes to a quick stop right in front of the house. What are you two going to do? There's bushes nearby. I'm going to do a big hide.
00:25:23
Speaker
Okay. Big hide in the bushes. I'm just going to sit and watch. Okay. Okay. Like, like how Binkers watches me when she's waiting for food. Excellent. Yeah. So all of you from your different perspectives, but all of you see these two foot, uh, you see Frankie's two, two foots get out of the car holding a hard shell carrier. Um.
00:25:49
Speaker
and in front the sound from within the carrier you hear a little boof boof boof boof and the two feet go inside the house close the door now poncho mr whiskers you don't see anything from here on out but frankie you hear the movement of the two feet downstairs you hear them shuffling around and you hear it closer boof boof
00:26:16
Speaker
And by the way, Frankie, you can leave your room. You have the opportunity to leave your room. You just never do. Well, I mean, I have all the surveillance. Right. Right. Right.
00:26:29
Speaker
I want to go to whatever monitor or piece of window that I can use to see what this is because I don't I don't like this. I am I'm already feeling I was already anxious and excited but now that I heard this I am I'm gonna I'm feeling a little I'm feeling a little angry attitude right now and I think I think I'm just gonna go to wherever I would be able to see the two feet from without leaving my room and then just like you know
00:26:59
Speaker
Oh, no, no, I'm gonna do I'm gonna go push the button again. Okay, push the button. And you hear this little throughout the house, the same little you always hear when you push the button. And you hear the two feet acknowledge it, you know, you hear you hear your your your favorite, Sophie, kind of go, Oh,
00:27:24
Speaker
Frankie and then there's some more shuffling and throughout the shuffling you can constantly hear this boar boar boar boar boar boar boar boar. And then slowly but surely you start to hear your two feet coming up your stairs. Your little stairs. Did they bring an inferior creature here? Is that what they did to me? Well so as as they're coming up the stairs you do
00:27:53
Speaker
You do see that not only is Sophie coming up with your special can of salmon, but her husband Ralph is also on his way up the stairs and Ralph has a leash in his hands and you follow the leash and attached to it is a golden retriever puppy.
00:28:18
Speaker
who's super happy. He's a good boy. He's bouncing around. He's super excited to be exploring the house. I run over to where my big bundle of toys are. I pulled them on out that I think looks like a two foot gun banana banana banana. I put it, I put it in my mouth and I try to point that in towards it and I jump up into my kitty cat tree and I go raw.
00:28:44
Speaker
Roll. OK, I'm gonna I'm gonna need you to roll because you're not like a catcher, but I need you to roll to pick it up in your mouth and jump with it. OK, deal.
New Arrival: Tension with a Puppy?
00:29:01
Speaker
I rolled I rolled two of the shittiest rolls you can get. OK, so we've got an opportunity here. You rolled two ones, which is nice. So that's that's actually
00:29:16
Speaker
I'm dead. You're not dead. But this does put us kind of in a situation where snake eyes double ones. When both cat dice rolled for a challenge come up as ones, the result is snake eyes or an embarrassing failure. The player who rolled the dice has the first chance to describe the improbable and mortifying circumstances that have befallen the cat.
00:29:43
Speaker
If you choose, you can invite the other players to chime in with suggestions. And finally, I will add my own input and describe what actually happens.
00:30:03
Speaker
Uh, yeah, I would say, um, I would say this, whatever this toy I thought was a gun was, uh, it's a banana. You know, it's bigger than I thought it was when I was trying to keep it in my mouth. And I think when I, when I even like, I don't think I even make it to the kitty cat tree. I think I fucking just get the banana, the front of the banana stuck on the floor. And I do a really embarrassing flip forward and I'm mortified because like, that's not, that's very uncouth for a pretty cat like me to do anything like that. I'm not used to being on my back at all.
00:30:32
Speaker
And this this weird golden fluffy thing is getting more excited as it's watching you BORF BORF BORF fall and flip over yourself. And Sophie comes and she goes, Oh, Mr. Mr. Frankie, oh, baby. And she picks you up and gives you a cuddle and then puts you down with your can of salmon. And she goes, Okay, Mr. Frankie, I have a new friend for you to meet. This is Passy.
00:31:01
Speaker
And the puppy immediately goes and tries to rush over and eat your salmon out of the can. Oh man, I smacked that bitch. Don't you touch my shit. Get out of here. You uncooked swine. Let's see. I want you to roll to smack him as well. Roll for smackage. All right. And then that's a midnight right there.
00:31:35
Speaker
You better not roll two sixes. I rolled two sixes. Well, you still, you, so, so Passy had one failure and one success, but you had two successes. So overall, this is good outcome for you. So you smack Passy on the nose and he goes, and he backs up and he hides behind Sophie and you continue. I let my hand right away and then start wiping it on the floor. Like, just like.
00:32:00
Speaker
Get to get the scent of this filthy animal. Oh Come on, Mr. Frankie. Hang on Frankie. This is your new brother I want you it's gonna take some time, but don't worry. You're gonna get you're gonna be good friends And as you look for my nose up at it now Yeah as you as you look over at at Passy and you glare at him and turn your nose up You see something just like
00:32:28
Speaker
You look in his eyes, and you just see like a shadow flicker. And for a second, you swear his eyes turned red. Devo dawg. They're lifeless like a dawg's eyes. So Sophie leaves you alone with your salmon. She and Ralph go back downstairs, and they take Passy with them. And you can hear him throughout the house.
00:32:54
Speaker
exploring and looking around you can hear his little claws scraping on the hardwood floor as he runs around and boof boof um but you for now you've succeeded in your job and you've you've maintained your territory you've got your salmon and your two-foots are home
00:33:14
Speaker
I sit proudly as I scoop just a little bit at a time into my paw, into my mouth. With a handcrafted for my paw scooper so I don't have to get anything on my actual skin or fur. Yes, of course. You've got a little mechanical bowl that has a spoon attached to it that just feeds you like an airplane.
Mission to Explore the Manor
00:33:40
Speaker
Now outside, outside in the bushes and on the side of the driveway, you know, Pancho, Mr. Whiskers, you've been, obviously you haven't witnessed what's going on, but you've been hearing the boarfing inside and the excitement. And maybe, you know, in a window you caught a glance of this weird golden dog running around the house exploring.
00:34:05
Speaker
Now, Mr. Whiskers, because of your experience with this town and with this manor, you do know Frankie lives in the attic. You've seen him before in the windows. You've just never interacted with him. He seems a bit stuck up in the smog. I don't want to speak to him. He does seem a little bit snooty. However,
00:34:27
Speaker
This new creature has just invaded his home, has just invaded your town. Come to think of it, now that you see him in the windows, this little retriever, you'd noticed ever since the storm, you've been seeing more and more dogs in the town. You know, more people are getting dogs and you've seen them in other homes as well. It's a damn apocalypse of dogs.
00:34:51
Speaker
So what are you going to do? Are you going to try and go see Frankie and see if he's okay? Are you going to break into the house and investigate the dog? Poncho is with you. So Poncho, you also have this opportunity. You've been seeing this, although you haven't seen as many dogs as Mr. Whisker has. I'm just going to walk up there, walk up to the car and just smell around. I want you both to roll for your smelling.
00:35:31
Speaker
Oh my goodness, the Mr. Whiskers are good at hunting. What is going on? Okay. Nervous. We don't have any skill bonuses, so I don't know how it's supposed to work. That's true. So here you both are sniffing the tires of this car, and man, this car smells so different. I mean, you're used to the normal smells of the village and the little woods outside, but this smells like
00:35:37
Speaker
I'm going to smell what they're selling. Oh, I got two fails.
00:35:56
Speaker
This smells weird. This car has been everywhere. This doesn't exist. And the smells are so overpowering that you both end up rubbing yourself against the tires and against the car to try and absorb the smells. Can I spray on the car? I want to spray on the car. You're welcome to spray on the car. I don't like it.
00:36:17
Speaker
There, now you got a good smell. All right. But before you spray it, the two of you probably spend at least two or three minutes just rubbing up against the car with the sides of your faces and everything. Well, I didn't realize they both rolled so poorly. I only saw the first roll, but the second one just loaded. Yep, they both. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So. Wow.
00:36:41
Speaker
The two of you are out here rubbing up on the car, spraying the car. Mr. Whiskers, after you spray the car, you've pretty much, you're done with it. You don't want anything left to do with the car. Frankie.
00:36:55
Speaker
You're spent, yes. Frankie, at this point you have finished your salmon and you've gotten back up on your perch to look out the window and you've just watched both of these cats rub all over your two foots car. Quick mechanical question. What does a double six do, a midnight do? I saw the reference, but I didn't see what you do with it.
00:37:22
Speaker
Is that anything special happen when you do a double six? When both cat dice rolled for a challenge come up on six, the result is midnight indicating a triumphant success. Again, the rolling player gets the first crack at suggesting the scene, followed by the players and finalized by the cat herder. Usually the great success serves as its own reward, but of course the cat herder can always throw in a treat if it's especially funny or awesome.
00:37:47
Speaker
So it's just a, it's just a very, okay, cool. It's just a more dramatic way to say that you succeeded. Okay, cool. Yeah. All right. Yeah. So I see these two, these two chumps down there, these two underlings sniffing around, rubbing around on my two foots car. My two foots four wheel. Yes. Yeah. So I kind of tap on the glass a bit. You know, just like, you know, just kind of like, like cats do when they're kind of testing some stuff out, like, yeah.
00:38:16
Speaker
I go, meow, meow, meow. I don't hear this. You don't hear him. That's true. You do hear the little glass pinks. And you do look up and you do see him pawing at the glass in the attic window. You can't hear him meowing, although you can see that he's clearly meowing.
00:38:42
Speaker
And the two of you, neither of you have been in this house and you've only ever seen him in the attic. You've never seen Frankie anywhere else. And here he is scratching at the glass over and over and over, clearly meowing. Is Frankie trapped in the house? Does Frankie need help? No, has he always been up there?
00:39:10
Speaker
Yeah, you've never seen him anywhere else but the attic. You've only ever seen him in the attic. He's never been anywhere else in the house as far as you're aware. At this point, I'm getting desperate and I stand up on my back legs and I press my belly like up against the glass and put my hands in the air. I look like that hanging there poster. I want to go play with this cat now. I want to roll around and knock his belly. Okay.
00:39:34
Speaker
So what? Mr. Whiskers Pancho, you're both down on the ground and you see him getting more and more desperate with this window. What are you going to do? All right, I'll get my thieves tools out. You got a grappling hook in there. I want to roll hack and slash. You're a cat. You can jump. Is there any open windows or anything I can sniff around on the outside or like an open basement window I can slip into?
00:40:04
Speaker
I am. You don't see any open windows, you know, on the ground floor of the basement area, but you do see, you know, there's, there's a little garden wall around the house. There is an awning overhanging the porch, the patio. You may be able to jump up to the attic windows potentially.
00:40:26
Speaker
All right, I'm gonna do both of you can do that as well. Although, in this circumstance, you know, it's a both. It's an option for both of you. But one of you can try and convince me which one of you is the right cat for the job if you want. It's just I have a cat.
00:40:46
Speaker
I don't think Pancho can be bothered to climb stuff right now. Okay, okay. Then go ahead and roll for me, Mr. Whiskers. Roll 2d6. Six and five, baby.
00:41:00
Speaker
Excellent. Okay. So this was going to be a normal challenge, but you met the challenge. I mean, obviously you're a catrobat. You have experience jumping from roof to roof and climbing buildings. So you do it, no problem. You, you leap off the garden wall and you hang, you get your claws into the awning over the patio and then you, you lift yourself up with your amazing front muscles.
00:41:28
Speaker
You know, you're pulling, you do a pull up, basically a cat pull up right there on the awning. You get yourself on the roof of the, uh, the porch, the patio. You kind of skitter your way up the different, you know, you jump up on a windowsill, then you jump up on a different windowsill. You pull yourself up over the second floor awning and you're on the roof over and you're by the dormer windows where that lead into the attic. Okay.
00:41:56
Speaker
I'm going to, I'm going to come face to face to the glass with Frankie. All right, Frankie, what's going to happen? You just watched this, this big muscley fat cat just gracefully get his way up to your window. Uh,
00:42:12
Speaker
Well, uh, I got to get back down on all fours and I just, because I'm so like stressed out and tired from being anxious, like I slide like my, my, my face and my belly and my paws slide all the way back. And my head, but the window for a second. I just look, I kind of like look back back at the video camera footage in my house and I look over and go, yeah.
00:42:38
Speaker
Now you've been making quite a bit of noise up here. Your two foots have not come to investigate, but you do hear behind you rushing up the stairs, the sounds of a clumsy puppy.
00:42:55
Speaker
I'm going to put him out of my musery. My musery. I hate him. And Mr. Whiskers, you see this on the other side of the glass. There is a stairwell in this room with Frankie. And rushing up the stairwell is this clumsy big pod kind of falling over himself, little golden retriever puppy who just boof. You start to hear him. You can see him. He stops and he looks at
00:43:23
Speaker
at Frankie and then he looks at you in the window and you see it too you see a shadow behind his eyes you see a little red flash in his eyes
00:43:33
Speaker
And then all of a sudden he starts, boof, boof, boof, boof, boof. And he starts rushing towards Frankie on the window. I started beating on the glass. Well, not only am I an asshole, I'm also just generally a street cat that runs for everything. So I'm going to jump down back to the low running. No. No.
00:43:56
Speaker
You survived by running away. That's how Cassie, that's the true Cass code. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. So Frankie, you're one saving grace, this big muscular cat who looks like he can win in a fight, sees the dog, turns around and runs off. What are you doing, Frankie?
00:44:13
Speaker
I run back over to my button and I push it and I let out the most desperate death crying sound I've ever let out.
00:44:28
Speaker
I just keep mashing it over until the point where I just exhaustively fall on the button. Whoa. Whoa. You're not going to attempt to run away from... I'm exhausted. My kitty cat body is like, can't take any more. My heart can't take it anymore. Because he's not meant for this kind of stress.
00:44:49
Speaker
Okay, so you're up high enough on the little shelf that your button is on that Passy can't get to you, but he's down there and he keeps trying to jump up and he's boarfin' away, he's barkin' and wolfin' and he's jumpin' up and down on the hardwood and he's makin' all this noise and you're hitting this button and all of a sudden your two feet rush up the stairs and they go, Passy, Passy, leave Mr. Frankie Munoz alone, Passy.
00:45:18
Speaker
And Ralph grabs Passy and scoops him up and he walks away and Sophie stays and she goes, oh, oh, Frankie, you're okay, buddy. It's okay. And she gives you a little scritch under the ears and then she walks away. She doesn't stay. Yep.
00:45:36
Speaker
I knock one of my trophies off the counter.
Pancho's Discovery and the Mysterious Void
00:45:40
Speaker
One of my kitty cat trophies. She goes, Frankie, stop that. She picks it up and puts it back and then gives you a little scritch on the head again and then continues to walk away. I do it again. Doesn't matter. At this point, she's down the stairs and you hear them actually close the door to the attic.
00:46:04
Speaker
So you've always been able to leave the attic, but they just closed the door and you cannot get out anymore. Yeah. Well, that's fine. You know, he does my house. He stays down there where the peons live. Uh-huh. So I go back up to see what's going on.
00:46:25
Speaker
Okay, so you go back to your window, Frankie, and Mr. Whiskers is there again. Poncho is still down on the ground, just sort of cleaning his... He's taking a kitty bath. Well, I like to do other stuff, but... Okay, well, what do you want to do, Poncho? I want to fucking investigate what the hell was in that kennel. Oh, the one they took inside? Yeah. Okay, so you'll have to get in the house.
00:46:55
Speaker
Oh, okay. What kind of door are we dealing with here? The front door is one of these big, elaborate wooden doors with stained glass windows in it.
00:47:10
Speaker
It looks a little bit too sophisticated, even for you, Pancho. But the windows, these are the same windows that they put in the house that you live in. Same construction, just on a bigger house. So you're familiar with the latch systems on the windows. Unfortunately, you're only familiar with the latch systems on the inside. Yeah, so that's not happening.
00:47:35
Speaker
And now, now you do notice on the second floor, kind of where Mr. Whiskers is, you know, same windows, although a couple of them are open on the second floor. None of Frankie's windows are open at all. Okay. Is there an easy way up?
00:47:56
Speaker
You can attempt to do the jump and the graceful leap that Mr. Whiskers did after you saw him do it. I was ready to find a more secure route, slide it off. Okay. Is there a ladder somewhere? There's no ladder. There's a tree nearby. You might be able to climb the tree and leap over to the side of the roof because this house is not up to code and the trees are too close to the house and they hang over the roof. Is there any over the car in the driveway?
00:48:26
Speaker
Yeah, there's a, there's a tree that overhangs the driveway. You could get over the car. How high? Um, like really low. Can I jump from the, from the branch to the branch to the roof of the car is probably like a 10 foot gap.
00:48:44
Speaker
I can I can survive that. Yes. You could also jump from a branch to the roof of the house. That would probably only be like a. Oh, yeah. Sorry. I wanted to like. Get because of my cats. Big. He's a big, big boy, right? He is. I just want to land on the car and I want to set the alarm off so that they come outside. OK. OK. Yeah. Yeah. You know about car alarms.
00:49:11
Speaker
All right. All right. So I want you to roll to climb the tree and jump down on the car to see how well you do. This is big chunkers climbing a tree. Okay. Okay. So you've got a fail and you've got a success. You've got a, uh, okay. Um,
00:49:29
Speaker
So you've got some partial progress. You've managed to get up into the tree and get over the car. But now that you're up here, you're not feeling as confident about the landing as you were when you made this plan from the ground.
00:49:49
Speaker
All right, how does the roof look then? Is that close by? The roof of the house is a little bit closer and is on the same level as the tree branch, so you wouldn't be falling down. You would be kind of jumping over. It's probably a six and a half foot jump between the branch you're on and the roof of the second floor. Well, yeah, I got to go for it. OK, so give me another roll to see how well you do jumping from the branch
00:50:20
Speaker
Oh, okay. Excellent. Yeah. So you, you, you, you, you kind of scrunched down, you get in your pounce position, you feel the branch kind of swaying a little bit and you use that bounce of the branch.
00:50:34
Speaker
as momentum to leap over towards the towards the roof and you land gracefully on the the roof overlooking the, you know, the roof that would be over the porch. And then from there, you can follow the easy path that Mr. Whiskers followed to get up to the roof of the second floor to get near the dormer windows where Frankie is, if you want to, or you can go through the open window. Okay.
00:51:00
Speaker
Yeah. So you make your way over and you find an open window that leads into what your two foot, this is the same kind of room your two foot has, although it's a little more elegant. It's got that weird bowl that your two foot likes to sit on a lot. You've watched her sit on that bowl. Um, and then it's got a sink. Uh, and you know, that weird, that weird standing water. Cascader that your two foot stands in a lot at home.
00:51:30
Speaker
Yeah, there's actually is a little water here because Ralph recently took a shower. So there is a little water in the shower. And the lid is up on the toilet. So you could also drink out of the toilet if you want. Nope. Okay. Great. So you're in the two foot bathroom. Oh, really? Yeah. I should have thought I was in a bedroom.
00:51:51
Speaker
No, no, you jumped in the bathroom. Um, but the door is open to the bedroom and, um, Ralph is in the bedroom. Uh, you don't see, you don't see anybody, but Ralph and Ralph's kind of just lying down. Okay. Uh, stealth check. I mean, you're a cat. You're stealthy. You have the stealth. Naturally. All right.
00:52:20
Speaker
Yeah. Uh, even a big boy like you is, is you're still a cat. So you're trying to sniff out the location of Frankie.
00:52:29
Speaker
Yeah, it's weird. I mean, you've smelled Frankie before on your two foot. Your two foot has interacted with Frankie before, so you know his scent, and you know he lives here, but the weird thing is his scent isn't really in this house very much. You can pick it up briefly, but for you, you are well aware that your scent is all over your house, because you hang out everywhere. You have free reign of your house, but Frankie,
00:52:58
Speaker
His scent is barely in the house at all. You sneak around and you do find an area. You find a closed door where his scent seems to be a little bit stronger, but it's like he hasn't been near this door in a number of weeks. He's been here, but he just hasn't been to this door in a number of weeks.
00:53:19
Speaker
Okay. Do I see how to open it? The door is closed. Um, but you do see, and Frankie never even noticed this cause he never goes near the door, but there is a little, uh, cat door in this big door. There's a little flap.
The Ominous Mystery Unfolds
00:53:36
Speaker
Uh, the flap is locked, but you've seen these before. Uh, go ahead and roll to see if you can unlock the little flap. I got a one and a three.
00:53:49
Speaker
Okay, so it takes a little bit. You have to paw at the flap a little bit and it makes a little noise while you're doing it, but eventually you do get the little hook undone and the flap does swing freely. Now while you're doing this, Frankie, you're up in your room and you hear
00:54:11
Speaker
You hear somebody fiddling at your door. You never go down to that door, but you hear somebody. You hear somebody scratching and fiddling at that door. What are you going to do?
00:54:25
Speaker
I've, uh, well, I've just pushed my second, uh, trophy off of this off of the shelf. Um, because I want my two feet to come back and see that I'm furious. Um, so, um, so then I, I kind of hear that. So I jumped back down and I grabbed a different toy and just because I'm feeling a little insecure, I grabbed my mouse toy that makes me feel stronger than it. Um, you know, and I put it in my mouth and, uh, do you put it in your water bowl or do you put it in your mouth?
00:54:54
Speaker
No, no, I put it in my mouth because it makes me feel strong to know that I'm murdering this thing that isn't gonna fight back. Okay, so you're not gonna drown the mouse, you're gonna eat the mouse. Got it. No, yeah, I'm gonna sink my teeth into it and hold it in there for a little bit. You hear that, Onyxia? You don't have to drown the mice, Onyxia! So yeah, I'm gonna, I guess I'll go down to where that door is, but like kind of...
00:55:19
Speaker
There's a little stairwell so you can sit at the top of the landing and you can watch the door or you can go down the stairs to the door. I'm proceeding with caution and I'm gonna go I think I'm gonna sit at the top at the top of the stairs looked down at the door.
00:55:39
Speaker
Okay, so kind of get low like a cat would get kind of nervous and want to get low to be seen as little as possible. Okay, okay. While you're sitting there, you notice that the door has a cat flap in it. You've lived in this attic for maybe four years and you never knew that your door had a cat flap in it. But you're watching the cat flap and all of a sudden it starts swinging and then this
00:56:02
Speaker
Pancho's a really big cat and this is kind of a cat front. You see, first you see his head poke through and then slowly but surely he forces the rest of himself through and he's just so big and he's just got so much fur that's just floofing out as he squeezes his way through this tiny little cat flap.
00:56:28
Speaker
You're not as familiar with Poncho as you are, Mr. Whiskers. You've seen Mr. Whiskers running around your land before. And you recognize Poncho's smell because his two foot feeds you sometimes, but you've never actually seen Poncho until now, I don't think.
00:56:47
Speaker
You're just aware of his existence. I think I'm taken aback by his gargantuan size. And as I go to let out a meow and my mouth drops out of my mouth and drops a few stairs down we go, wow. And I look at him like, oh. I just give him one look and I just continue like checking out the room and looking around.
00:57:13
Speaker
Yeah, punch punch or you, you, you, you've managed to squeeze your way through it was a bit of a tight fit but your whiskers fit and if your whiskers fit then the rest of your fits. So you've managed to squeeze your way through you go up the stairs and you've entered this.
00:57:28
Speaker
this enormous elegant room like there's there's beautiful velvet curtains around the dormer windows there's two or three cat trees that look super soft but have scratching posts there's a hand-painted toy box that says meow-naz toys and there's this elegant
00:57:53
Speaker
Ween-sized bed that's bigger than the bed your two foot sleeps in at home that has these beautiful sheets on them and fluffy blankets and scratches, like scratching boards, scratching posts everywhere all over the room. Wow. What a spoiled cat.
00:58:15
Speaker
I sit very proudly when I notice that this cat is looking at all my things. So the kennel isn't here? The kennel is not in here and Frankie thinks he's sitting proudly but he looks like a ball of anxiety just sitting there waiting, just twitching basically. Frankie is not a worldly cat. His little sanctuary has been disturbed and he's slowly but surely melting down.
00:58:45
Speaker
I've definitely traveled the world, but I've seen very little of it, even though I've been around everywhere. Yes, exactly. Frankie's smell is all over this room. You can smell his two feet. Again, you're kind of familiar with their smell, but there is a new smell here as well that you were smelling throughout the house that is fresh and different. You've never smelled anything like this before.
00:59:12
Speaker
Yeah, that's what I want to find. I thought it would be upstairs for some reason, but it's clearly not, so I'm gonna just leave. So you're gonna observe the room and then turn around and leave? Yeah.
00:59:23
Speaker
Yeah. Mr. Whiskers, you do see Frankie or you do see that Pancho has made his way into the house and you see him in Frankie's room and he comes and he looks around and he turns to leave while he's, you know, he's still in the room, but he's about to leave. Are you going to do anything outside? Mr. Whiskers? I'm just going to watch him go. Okay. I'm not ready to go to houses yet. All right.
00:59:50
Speaker
Okay. I have a question. Do I know, do I know, uh, Frankie's two feats? Do I know them? Do I know? Like, have they seen me before where they recognize me? Um, yeah, you've never met them personally, although you do know their smell because your two foot is their servant. Um, so your two foot does smell like them and has interacted with them quite a bit.
01:00:16
Speaker
You don't know if they know what you look like. Uh, but presumably your two foot has told them that you exist. I mean, yeah, I feel like if your servants had a cat, they would, and they, and then you had any decent relationship, you'd be showing them pictures, but yeah, the cat does not know that. So yeah, so I'm a little cautious. Yeah.
01:00:38
Speaker
But he is under the assumption that they're not going to just like, if I get detected, I'm not going to just like get kicked and killed or something. So I'll just get thrown out. And Mr. Whiskers has actually, Mr. Whiskers has interacted with these humans, but they chased him off with a broom, although you're not aware of that. But that may be one of the reasons Mr. Whiskers is a little hesitant to come in the house is because Frankie's two feet have chased him off with a broom.
01:01:05
Speaker
Your two feet or your two foot actually likes Mr. Whiskers. She gives him food On your patio and that's but but yeah Frankie's two feet are not a fan of mr. Whiskers
01:01:18
Speaker
So you squeeze your way back through the cat flap back into the hallway. Frankie, this cat that just came in and looked around, he just kind of upturned his nose at all of your stuff and then turned around and left and went back into the hallway. Are you gonna follow him?
01:01:41
Speaker
Yeah, I'm gonna pick up my mouse. I'm gonna pick up my mouse, I'm gonna follow him and be like, listen, you look at my cool stuff and you tell me it's cool. And so like, my guy's following him or Frankie's following him just like, what the hell? Listen, you acknowledge the things. You watch him squeeze himself through the cat flap. You've never actually used the cat flap.
01:02:04
Speaker
Yeah, I push it a few times just like let it flap and I kind of like take a step back Like I kind of like anxiously like hot back every time it swings back toward me like boop Like hmm, and so I poke it about six seven eight thousand times before I decide that I'm gonna push it all the way so poncho You get through the cat flap and you hear Frankie behind you figuring out how the cat flap works works Are you gonna wait for him? Are you just gonna leave cuz I mean I I
01:02:32
Speaker
This is like a solo. Well, technically Mr. Whiskers is supposed to be helping me, but yeah.
01:02:41
Speaker
You get chased off with a broom. Yeah, you don't fuck with that again. But yeah, Frankie's trying to follow you, but you can tell he's also very confused by the cat flap. So it's obvious he's going to take him a couple minutes to gain the confidence to go through the flap. You can wait here for him or an encourage him, or you can just leave him here.
01:03:10
Speaker
Uh, can I help him? You can poke your head through and then like pull it out to show him it's okay to go through the flap. Yeah, I'll do that. I thought he was going to poke his head and like bite me on the back of the neck and drag me out.
01:03:29
Speaker
Though, I mean, you're two adult cats, right? He may be very big, but he's, you're not, you're too, you're still, you're too still big for him to carry you out like a kitten. Oh, I thought he was like Hulkamania size. He's big boy. He is big boy. But, you know, you're, you're.
01:03:45
Speaker
you're not a kitten anymore. And so that's more of a, as a kitten, that's like a, yeah, let's go this way, dumbass. But as an adult cat, that's actually a sign of aggression. So he's gonna poke his head through and glare at you and then pull his head back out, showing you that you can fit through it. As he pokes his head in, I try to jump through it as the flap goes down, as his head goes out. So I don't have to touch it.
01:04:13
Speaker
Um, roll, roll a check to see how graceful you are with this. I'm just going to crash through it like the Kool-Aid man. Uh, five and a one. It was an easy challenge. So you made it through fine. Um, okay. So, so here's the thing, Frankie. You've never been in this hallway except in your carrier. This is the first time you've been in the hallway without being in your carrier.
01:04:42
Speaker
And okay, it's got some nice hardwood floors. There's some nice wallpaper on the walls and Pancho is a little bit ahead of you sniffing around Trying to catch the scent the new scent that he smells in your house I Followed gingerly behind the big cat Alright Pancho go ahead and roll a check for me to see if you can pick up the dog smell. I
01:05:11
Speaker
Okay, so you've got a failure and a success. You've got partial progress here. You can pick up the scent. Unfortunately, the dog has been running around the house so much, you're not entirely sure which direction he went because his scent is just overlapping constantly and you can't track him very well.
01:05:33
Speaker
Um, now you will search the whole house, I guess. Okay. So you're, you're, the two of you are making your way around the second floor. Um, you, you go back to the bedroom, Ralph is still sleeping. Uh, there's a couple of guest rooms, nothing there. And you get, you make your way over to the landing of the house or the second floor and which overlooks the first floor entryway. Um, and you do see on the floor on the, on the marble tile.
01:06:03
Speaker
You do see the carrier, the hard shell carrier is on the floor in the entryway. Now you've also noticed as you've been doing this that Frankie has been following you around. He's not been doing anything useful. He's just terrified following you around. He's got a stupid mouse in his mouth. He's not doing much. That's fine. It doesn't bother me. Mr. Whiskers, what are you doing?
01:06:33
Speaker
Uh, no, I saw them all leaving. I'm going to, I'm going to jump down along the next level of the house, whatever, and try and look around the windows for them. Yeah. Okay.
01:06:45
Speaker
Yep, you've managed to track them inside the house as they're tracking the dog, so you're just kind of circling the roof of the house following them through the windows. You have passed a couple open windows. Do you want to go in? As far as the windows close to where they are?
01:07:07
Speaker
Yeah, there's so you pass the bathroom window that that Pancho first made his way in. Okay. And then the you when you when you turned, you turned a corner and went to the another side of the house as Pancho was going through, there's another open window in the hallway that they are in. Pancho has just stopped and he's looking at the entryway. He's sitting on the landing looking down at the entryway and there's an open window in that hallway.
01:07:35
Speaker
Alright, I'll hippity hop down there to be by those guys. Okay, so you hop in gracefully. You land perfectly right next to Frankie. Frankie, this cat just landed next to you. I do that run thing where a cat tries to run really quickly but slides on the hardwood for a few seconds. And then I run through the wall by accident. Great. Great.
01:08:01
Speaker
Mr. Whiskers, Pancho, the two of you at this point are starting to get a little bit worried about Frankie. You're not sure he's really a cat. He's kind of dumb.
01:08:14
Speaker
He never learned how to be a cat. And the two of you are concerned at this point. Am I? Am I? The thought crosses your mind. Like, what the hell is wrong with this guy? Yeah. It's your choice if you want to be concerned. I'm not really concerned. I already helped him. All right. So the three of you are now sitting on the landing overlooking the entryway. And you can see the kennel.
01:08:42
Speaker
And you can actually hear Passy boarfing in the other room. And you can hear Sophie laughing. And Frankie, you recognize Sophie's voice and you recognize her laugh. But you're sitting here, you're looking at the kennel, you're on the second floor. What are you guys doing?
01:09:10
Speaker
I ain't doing shit. I'm going downstairs. Okay. Are all three of you going downstairs or is it just Mr. Poncho? I'm letting Poncho lead the show. I'll follow him. Okay. Uh, Frankie? Uh, I just, um.
01:09:25
Speaker
I dropped my, my mouse and I batted around a little bit just to build up some confidence. I put up my bite back onto it. It's like my line is blanket. First time he has left his attic carrier. So.
01:09:53
Speaker
Yes, I'm very much like full of anxiety. And it's the only thing that's keeping me sane is this fucking mouse. Are you gonna follow them down the stairs?
01:10:03
Speaker
Yeah, I'm gonna pick my blankie and suck my thumb as I go downstairs. Okay, so the three of you make your way down the stairs, slowly, cautiously, because Passy is in the other room bouncing around, barking, having the time of his life, and you don't know if he's gonna come out or not. And you slowly, slowly creep up to the carrier.
01:10:27
Speaker
You're looking left, right, behind you, in front of you. You can still hear the dog, and you get to the carrier, and the door is open. Are you gonna go in the carrier? Are you gonna look in the carrier? I'm gonna look in it, smell it. Okay, so this smells super strong, like that weird-ass smell you've been smelling all over Frankie's house. Yeah, cool. Yeah, it smells bad. You don't like this smell.
01:10:56
Speaker
But it's not just, and Mr. Whiskers, you pick up on this, because you've interacted with dogs in your lifetime. You've especially been seeing a lot of dogs in town recently. The dogs you've interacted with in the past have smelled like this, but these new dogs, including Passy, have a different, they have the smell you're used to, but they have a different smell, a smell that makes your hair stand up. It's weird. And as you look in,
01:11:27
Speaker
If you look into the carrier, you expect to see the back of the carrier, but instead it's just a void. It's just a black inky void in this carrier, in this plastic shell. I want to pee outside of the carrier. Okay, Mr. Whiskers is going to pee on it. What are you going to do, Poncho?
01:11:52
Speaker
So it's like black in there. I can't see anything. Well, you would expect to look in and just see, you know, the inside of the carrier. Yeah. You've been in a carrier before, but there's like a black inky hole in here. There's no back of the carrier. It's just a void. I'm going in that. I'm going in that. Mr. Whiskers, are you coming with him? Uh, I'm going to, I'm going to watch him go in. I got him to come around with us. He's going in there and we're watching him go in.
01:12:21
Speaker
Uh, Frankie, what are you going to do? Uh, sniff my pee. Um, I have, uh, I don't know. I feel like Frankie, like if I come out and I see like, has, has, has Pancho walked into this void? Yes. He's, he's, you know, how cats slowly creep into things. He's slowly just making his way in like one inch at a time, just going into the carrier.
01:12:52
Speaker
His fur is standing up on end a little bit. I think I'm gonna drop my mouse again and just kind of like roll on it for a second and then just kind of
01:13:14
Speaker
pick it back up contemplatively and just kind of like just follow into poncho because i feel like poncho can can fight anything that i'll encounter okay so poncho's going really slowly so you're basically just gonna push your way up against his butt as he makes his way cautiously in there
01:13:35
Speaker
as as your as your paw poncho touches the the first part of the void as as soon as you get your paw in there the boarfing stops and there's a pause and there's a freeze and then all of a sudden the three of you hear passi sprinting from the living room over to you in the carrier you hear him
01:14:02
Speaker
Just hauling ass and growling as he sprints towards you.
01:15:15
Speaker
is it look good already?