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Building Your Girl Gang + Triple Scrote Stack
37 Plays4 years ago
If you ever find yourself without a friend group after you've bossed up, this is the episode for you!
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Transcript
Patreon Updates and Community Engagement
00:00:00
Speaker
Before we get started, I'd just like to tell you about some recent changes we've made to our Patreon.
00:00:04
Speaker
We now have a Discord server that's exclusive for our Level Up and Queen Shit members.
00:00:09
Speaker
So if you'd like to chat directly with the hosts of this podcast and make friends with other like-minded queens, sign up for our Patreon and select either the Level Up or Queen Shit tier.
00:00:19
Speaker
As always, Patreon members have access to weekly bonus content on Fridays.
00:00:23
Speaker
And this past week, we talked about the recent subreddit shutdown and gave our members the inside scoop on what's been going on with the subreddit moderators and podcast hosts.
00:00:33
Speaker
Thanks for listening, queens, and on to the show.
00:00:36
Speaker
And today we've got a triple whammy for our Roast of Scroat.
00:00:39
Speaker
Triple stack Roast of Scroat today from Jay.
00:00:45
Speaker
And she wants to start by saying, so I just wanted to start out by saying, I'm so thankful for what you guys do.
00:00:52
Speaker
I've always had FDS aligned values and just felt so aligned before I found the sub.
00:00:57
Speaker
But thanks to a scroty complaint post on another sub.
00:01:01
Speaker
Hashtag die mad.
00:01:03
Speaker
This was a few years ago now and I've been going back ever since.
00:01:07
Speaker
And I really don't know what I would have done without you guys.
00:01:11
Speaker
You've helped me to stand firm in my boundaries and completely validated everything I felt for years.
00:01:17
Speaker
I absolutely love you and the entire community and I'm just so glad to see it continue to grow and help other women.
00:01:23
Speaker
Oh, thank you, Jay.
00:01:25
Speaker
So, on to the actual roasting.
Jay's Empowerment Journey
00:01:29
Speaker
Scroat number one.
00:01:30
Speaker
I met Chad when I was around 19 and he was 25.
00:01:34
Speaker
Oh, no.
00:01:34
Speaker
His name is Chad?
00:01:36
Speaker
Already we're done.
00:01:38
Speaker
Okay, okay.
00:01:40
Speaker
Just roasting you for having the name Chad.
00:01:43
Speaker
Chad really liked to smoke weed and he was into snowboarding.
00:01:47
Speaker
Of course he did.
00:01:51
Speaker
Of course he did.
00:01:52
Speaker
And he was also really great with his finances.
00:01:56
Speaker
Stingy bastard.
00:01:58
Speaker
For example, he liked going 50-50 and he once went several weeks without deodorant because he wanted to save money.
00:02:06
Speaker
Any snowboards?
00:02:07
Speaker
Ew.
00:02:07
Speaker
What a dirty little screw.
00:02:09
Speaker
Ew.
00:02:09
Speaker
Ew!
00:02:10
Speaker
How much is deodorant in the US?
00:02:12
Speaker
Like, how much is it, like, bro?
00:02:13
Speaker
Like, $5 per thing?
00:02:16
Speaker
99 cents.
00:02:16
Speaker
Really?
00:02:17
Speaker
I mean, it depends on the quality.
00:02:19
Speaker
But you can definitely find, like, dollar store deodorant.
00:02:22
Speaker
So he's got the money to smoke weed, but he hasn't got the money to get deodorant.
00:02:26
Speaker
Right.
00:02:26
Speaker
This just doesn't compute.
00:02:28
Speaker
Yeah, if you can't afford deodorant, you shouldn't be smoking weed.
00:02:31
Speaker
So it continues.
00:02:33
Speaker
And I remained with Chad for nearly four years.
00:02:36
Speaker
I know until the week before my final undergraduate exams when he decided to come clean about some cheating.
00:02:43
Speaker
Oh, no.
00:02:43
Speaker
What a piece of shit.
00:02:45
Speaker
He was pretty resentful of my success.
00:02:47
Speaker
And I'm pretty sure he timed it that way just to throw me off.
00:02:50
Speaker
Yeah, I was just about to say that.
00:02:51
Speaker
I was like, that seems like a very convenient time.
00:02:54
Speaker
Why do they do that?
00:02:56
Speaker
It seems like a very conveniently inconvenient time to announce that.
00:02:59
Speaker
It ended up being my best semester regardless.
00:03:03
Speaker
So suck it, Chad.
00:03:05
Speaker
Good.
00:03:05
Speaker
So I just wanted to know, I just wanted you guys to know, I looked up how much a three-pack of deodorant costs on Walmart, and it's $5 for a three.
00:03:16
Speaker
Yeah, I guess $5.
00:03:17
Speaker
The price is right.
00:03:19
Speaker
I won.
00:03:19
Speaker
No, for three of them.
00:03:21
Speaker
Not just one, for three.
00:03:23
Speaker
For three of them, yeah.
00:03:24
Speaker
Cool.
00:03:25
Speaker
Anyways, I promptly dumped him and blocked him everywhere, which apparently he was not expecting, as Chad was very delusional.
00:03:33
Speaker
So he made new accounts across multiple different platforms to message me.
00:03:38
Speaker
And at one point, he even used a new number to say he had written me a song.
00:03:42
Speaker
But I refused to meet him or answer his video call.
00:03:46
Speaker
So what I ended up getting was a giant run-on sentence with about 500 words worth of lyrics before I blocked him again.
00:03:54
Speaker
I had a guy write me a poem one time and I told, it was really bad.
00:03:59
Speaker
And I was like, nothing makes my pussy drier than bad poetry.
00:04:05
Speaker
The guy fucking cried.
00:04:06
Speaker
Anyways.
00:04:07
Speaker
Yeah.
00:04:09
Speaker
And then we all laughed together.
00:04:13
Speaker
But I'm a bad person.
00:04:13
Speaker
So anyways.
00:04:14
Speaker
That's how it makes you guys cry.
00:04:21
Speaker
Yeah.
00:04:23
Speaker
I'm a man-eater.
00:04:24
Speaker
I'm proud of it.
00:04:27
Speaker
About a year ago, Chad tried contacting me again with a new email he had made.
00:04:32
Speaker
I couldn't believe it, but I ignored it for a few days until I decided to reply.
00:04:39
Speaker
As an aside, the band Rage Against the Machine was meant to play in my hometown the next year, but floor tickets were super expensive, around $400 each.
00:04:49
Speaker
That being said, they were less expensive than Chad was dumb.
00:04:54
Speaker
I think I can see where this is going.
00:04:57
Speaker
I mean, that doesn't seem like it's hard, to be fair.
00:05:02
Speaker
So anyways, I basically just played along with what he was saying.
00:05:08
Speaker
I sprinkled in like 60 heart emojis and then suggested that we go to this concert together to rekindle our relationship.
00:05:18
Speaker
The dumbass bought it.
00:05:20
Speaker
I used my credit card to make sure they were sent to my email and had him e-transfer me $800.
00:05:24
Speaker
And then I blocked him and sent my girlfriend a message saying we'd be going to rage.
00:05:30
Speaker
Hashtag boy bye.
00:05:32
Speaker
Queen shit.
00:05:36
Speaker
Sorry, I love that.
00:05:37
Speaker
I absolutely love that.
00:05:38
Speaker
I'm not mad whatsoever.
00:05:40
Speaker
Yeah, a lot of people are probably going to be like, oh my god, that's a scam.
00:05:43
Speaker
That's grift.
00:05:44
Speaker
That's like, oh my god, you ripped him off.
00:05:46
Speaker
I'm like, you know what?
00:05:47
Speaker
Men deserve to be scammed.
00:05:49
Speaker
Men deserve to be robbed.
00:05:50
Speaker
But the thing is, this is a payment for harassment.
00:05:53
Speaker
She told him to leave her alone.
00:05:55
Speaker
He didn't listen.
00:05:56
Speaker
Yeah, I call it the patriarchy tax.
00:05:59
Speaker
The asshole tax.
00:06:02
Speaker
The asshole tax, yeah.
00:06:03
Speaker
The asshole tax.
00:06:04
Speaker
First of all, he cheated.
00:06:05
Speaker
Then he waited to tell her at a particularly important time in her life to devastate her.
00:06:10
Speaker
And then when she broke up with him, he harassed her.
00:06:13
Speaker
Yeah, he had it coming.
00:06:14
Speaker
He was asking for it.
00:06:16
Speaker
If he didn't want to get scammed, he shouldn't have been a dickhead about it.
00:06:18
Speaker
So, on to scrote number two with Jay.
00:06:22
Speaker
So she said, so shortly after dumping Chad, I ended up with a rebound called Justin because he was just as douchey as Chad.
00:06:30
Speaker
I was going to talk to my friend Justin.
00:06:33
Speaker
Yeah.
00:06:35
Speaker
I'm Chad.
00:06:38
Speaker
Our prime minister's name is Justin.
00:06:40
Speaker
Can you imagine if a country, like a leader of a country's name was Chad?
00:06:44
Speaker
Oh my God.
00:06:45
Speaker
Can you imagine like a president of the United States, Chad?
00:06:48
Speaker
Bro, I was out snowboarding with my homie Justin.
00:06:56
Speaker
Chad is a musician and he has totally sick lyrics.
00:07:01
Speaker
He's really going to blow up, bro.
00:07:03
Speaker
Did you go to that Rage concert?
00:07:05
Speaker
Oh my God.
00:07:06
Speaker
Yeah.
00:07:08
Speaker
That's what it's giving.
00:07:09
Speaker
Yeah.
00:07:10
Speaker
I heard Rage was coming in time.
00:07:12
Speaker
So I'm going to hit up my ex-girlfriend because I know she's totally hot for me.
00:07:18
Speaker
This is Roseskirt featuring Chad.
00:07:21
Speaker
Yeah.
00:07:24
Speaker
He's doing Chad voice.
00:07:25
Speaker
So she continues.
00:07:26
Speaker
Justin had a man bun.
00:07:29
Speaker
Of course he did.
00:07:30
Speaker
Of course he did.
00:07:31
Speaker
Annie thought monogamy was really, really oppressive.
00:07:34
Speaker
Of course he did.
00:07:36
Speaker
He also found that labels were also oppressive.
00:07:39
Speaker
I just find labels like really oppressive to my man bun.
00:07:42
Speaker
These are the same guys that think that like women's boundaries or standards are oppressive to men.
00:07:47
Speaker
Fuck those guys.
00:07:48
Speaker
I just feel like my man bun isn't as luxurious if I'm in a monogamous relationship.
00:07:56
Speaker
Justin thought he was a very good boy because he was woke and also a sex positive feminist.
00:08:03
Speaker
Oh no.
00:08:05
Speaker
He was also very in touch with his emotions, which is apparently just another way of saying he liked to monologue at women.
00:08:13
Speaker
Also, he was depressed, refused to go to therapy and refused to communicate over anything other than Snapchat.
00:08:20
Speaker
I know.
00:08:21
Speaker
I was so stupid.
00:08:22
Speaker
Forgive me.
00:08:22
Speaker
Snapchat communication is at minimum a yellow flag.
00:08:26
Speaker
Yeah.
00:08:27
Speaker
In men.
00:08:28
Speaker
When men do it.
00:08:30
Speaker
When a man asks a woman to communicate via Snapchat, that's a red flag.
00:08:34
Speaker
So if he's depressed, I don't know if I should have came up with a slightly more depressed chat voice.
00:08:40
Speaker
Oh, that sounds pretty depressed.
00:08:41
Speaker
I find monogamy really oppressive to women.
00:08:47
Speaker
I consider myself a sex-positive feminist.
00:08:53
Speaker
Okay, these guys who are in touch with their emotions, these oh-so-sensitive guys who monologue at women, most of them are just covert narcissists, and I honestly would prefer a stoic guy who can't talk about feelings.
00:09:05
Speaker
I would prefer that guy over... I would prefer that over someone who's straight-up emotionally manipulative, right?
00:09:11
Speaker
I'd rather date a guy who doesn't talk about his feelings at all than talk to a guy who...
00:09:16
Speaker
Talks about his feelings in a way to, like, force me to feel pity for him because he's a fucking sociopath and wants to exploit my empathy.
00:09:23
Speaker
A few months had passed and, quite frankly, I was getting sick of his man bun wearing, but label avoided shit.
00:09:31
Speaker
We were meant to be going for a weekend away in a really remote part of the country.
00:09:36
Speaker
And on the way there, he made me drive around for an hour because he wanted to get food from an independent restaurant, but we couldn't find one that was open.
00:09:44
Speaker
This caused him to become really upset and essentially led to about an hour and a half of intense sulking with an attitude compounded by the fact that he had gotten in a fight with his mom, who he lived with that morning.
00:09:59
Speaker
Aww, what a poor baby!
00:10:02
Speaker
I spit out my drink.
00:10:03
Speaker
He's sad because he got in a fight with his mom whose basement he lives in.
00:10:07
Speaker
Was he built nice?
00:10:08
Speaker
Because maybe he lived with his mom because all he does is go to the gym.
00:10:11
Speaker
I hate men like that, honestly.
00:10:13
Speaker
I've dated men like that.
00:10:14
Speaker
They're like, I live with my mom and she cooks me everything.
00:10:17
Speaker
And I just spend like four hours a day at the gym.
00:10:20
Speaker
That's a Chad move.
00:10:21
Speaker
Yeah.
00:10:21
Speaker
Anyways.
00:10:22
Speaker
Anyways, I decided this was just too much bullshit for somebody who wasn't even a proper boyfriend.
00:10:28
Speaker
I smiled and nodded to all his nonsense, told him I wanted to stop to get some gas, pulled into a station about 300 kilometers away from anything else,
00:10:40
Speaker
then then suggested he go inside to get some snacks blocked him yeah she's good at teaching men lessons i like that yeah she understood the assignment this is very machiavellian but i'm sort of like i'm loving it but i've said this before men don't understand communication the only language they speak is consequences so yeah
00:11:01
Speaker
So another one bites the dust.
00:11:04
Speaker
And I think the only way out of that mess for him involved like a $2,000 cab ride, which quite frankly warms my heart.
00:11:11
Speaker
That's now Justin and Chad in the dust.
00:11:14
Speaker
Yeah, so two men down.
00:11:18
Speaker
Yeah, we're like two-fifths of the way through a boy band.
00:11:21
Speaker
I spent a few years finishing another degree and working on myself and getting a scholarship to do a PhD in the UK.
00:11:27
Speaker
Hi, Savannah!
00:11:31
Speaker
Before I got there, the university I was going to had made a page for new students to connect.
00:11:37
Speaker
And that's where I met Jamie.
00:11:39
Speaker
Oh, God.
00:11:41
Speaker
Is Jamie a red flag name in the UK or something?
00:11:44
Speaker
Yeah.
00:11:45
Speaker
Oh, Justin, Jamie and Chad.
00:11:47
Speaker
Justin, Jamie and Chad.
00:11:49
Speaker
Yeah, okay.
00:11:50
Speaker
He said Jamie had basic social skills which really made him stand out from the crowd.
00:11:55
Speaker
Unlike most men who are socially incompetent.
00:11:57
Speaker
That's about where his positive qualities stopped though.
00:12:00
Speaker
He was also depressed, really liked Jordan Peterson.
00:12:04
Speaker
He was fresh out of a relationship and not ready for anything serious.
00:12:09
Speaker
Anyways, when I got to the UK, we met and went to some events where we made a few new friends to hang out with.
00:12:18
Speaker
Just like I, at the very least, had the good sense to see early on how much of a low value train wreck he was and resolved to not see him as a romantic prospect.
00:12:27
Speaker
I sort of feel bad for this, for Jane now, because the thing is, right, this is like my first traffic coming out here.
00:12:34
Speaker
But like international students to the UK are always really hot.
00:12:37
Speaker
Like I used to, I had a job like welcoming international students.
00:12:42
Speaker
And I swear, the only reason why I did that job was because it would be like a room full of...
00:12:48
Speaker
Just like high candy.
00:12:50
Speaker
Like the French engineers are my favourite because they were always the hottest and the smartest, closely followed by the Dutch ones.
00:12:55
Speaker
But yeah, I would always go and just be like super, super thirsty.
00:12:59
Speaker
So I kind of feel bad that she missed out on all this because she clearly connected with Jamie before she came.
00:13:05
Speaker
Yeah, why are foreign exchange students so hot?
00:13:08
Speaker
In my high school, we had a few foreign exchange students from, I think it was Germany and Sweden and stuff, and they were super tall and super attractive, but because they dressed well and put effort into their appearance, all the local boys who wore fucking basketball shorts and UFC flat-brim ball caps would call the foreign exchange students metrosexual.
00:13:31
Speaker
Yeah.
00:13:32
Speaker
Like they basically thought it was like gay to shower and shave every day.
00:13:35
Speaker
Yeah, they were jealous.
00:13:36
Speaker
Yeah.
00:13:38
Speaker
Don't you have to have money usually to do foreign exchange things in high school or college?
00:13:44
Speaker
Generally speaking, yeah.
00:13:45
Speaker
Yeah.
00:13:45
Speaker
So that's probably why.
00:13:46
Speaker
Yeah.
00:13:47
Speaker
But they were just, they were just, oh, they were so attractive.
00:13:50
Speaker
Like I used to do that twice a year and I used to look forward to it every single time.
00:13:54
Speaker
They come fitted up and fresh to death.
00:13:57
Speaker
Nice.
00:13:57
Speaker
Eye candy.
00:13:58
Speaker
Anyway, so she continues.
00:14:00
Speaker
A few weeks later, I was hosting a board game snacks night at my flat.
00:14:04
Speaker
And when everyone was getting ready to go, he offered to stay and help me clean up in quotation marks.
00:14:10
Speaker
So I naively let him.
00:14:12
Speaker
So, of course, a few minutes later, I've got this scrote trying to kiss me.
00:14:16
Speaker
And then I sort of leaned back until he opened his eyes and realised what was going on.
00:14:22
Speaker
The next few minutes were pretty awkward.
00:14:24
Speaker
I couldn't really leave because we were in my flat and he just sort of stood there.
00:14:29
Speaker
Then he asked if I wanted to talk about it and asked why I didn't like him in quotation marks, because he thought we got along really well.
00:14:37
Speaker
I sort of said and gestured a bit and gestured broadly at all of him.
00:14:43
Speaker
Eventually he left.
00:14:44
Speaker
I mean, usually you would just ask a girl out on a date or something.
00:14:48
Speaker
You don't just try to plaster your lips on hers.
00:14:51
Speaker
Yeah, gosh.
00:14:53
Speaker
Right.
00:14:54
Speaker
I just feel like there's no there's no build up.
00:14:56
Speaker
And when men do stuff like that, I don't know if they think it's romantic in their head.
00:14:59
Speaker
This is why in some respects, I feel like they get this idea from Hollywood that just like surprise makeouts are always hot for women.
00:15:07
Speaker
Yeah, because women in Hollywood, you think about all the Indiana Jones movies, you know, the woman's like fighting with him and then he kisses her to make her shut up and she responds positively to it.
00:15:16
Speaker
You know, men watch that kind of stuff and think, oh, if I try that, then women will respond positively to that.
00:15:22
Speaker
No, like, fuck that.
00:15:24
Speaker
That's borderline sexual assault.
00:15:26
Speaker
They tend to make a spontaneous sexual combustion more realistic than it really is, especially with no warm up or warning.
00:15:33
Speaker
Yeah.
00:15:33
Speaker
It's probably and generally usually better, you know,
00:15:37
Speaker
ask her if she wants to hang out with you free tip there guys free dating tip and so i was meant to host a pancake party the next weekend uh which is exactly what it sounds like invite a load of people over and make pancakes uh basically an excuse to drink maple syrup and he knew about it oh this is totally a canadian patreon subscriber yeah this is one of yours it's one of yours alith
00:16:01
Speaker
Is this what you Canadians do?
00:16:04
Speaker
Do you just sit around drinking maple syrup for fun?
00:16:06
Speaker
Yeah, that's a Canadian hobby.
00:16:07
Speaker
We take shots.
00:16:08
Speaker
We just... We take our shots of whiskey and then chase it with maple syrup.
00:16:13
Speaker
Is that true?
00:16:15
Speaker
Okay.
00:16:20
Speaker
I mean, I don't know.
00:16:21
Speaker
I'm not judging.
00:16:22
Speaker
Maple syrup is delicious.
00:16:23
Speaker
No, leave that in.
00:16:25
Speaker
Americans now think that Canadians take shots of maple syrup as chaser for our whiskey.
00:16:30
Speaker
Hey, weirder things have happened.
00:16:33
Speaker
Yeah, we also live in igloos and live off of moose meat.
00:16:37
Speaker
And, you know, when we get into arguments with sociopaths, we push them off the ice flows in the middle of winter.
00:16:43
Speaker
Makes sense.
00:16:44
Speaker
I always suspected.
00:16:46
Speaker
The way that we deal with rapists in Canada is by taking them to an ice floe in the middle of winter and pushing them off when nobody is looking.
00:16:52
Speaker
Just kidding.
00:16:52
Speaker
Some guy on ice skates.
00:16:54
Speaker
Leaving for the polar bears.
00:16:58
Speaker
Anyways, yeah.
00:16:59
Speaker
So back to the pancakes of maple syrup.
00:17:03
Speaker
It turns out he still wanted to come to the pancake night, which I suspect was because there'd be other women there.
00:17:09
Speaker
But anyways, a few days before, I was in Poundland waiting in line to get some measuring cups and thinking about how I could possibly make the sex awkward when something caught my eye.
00:17:19
Speaker
It was the card stand.
00:17:21
Speaker
My brain thought that humour would be a great way to fix this whole mess.
00:17:25
Speaker
So a few days later, when I saw him in person, I gave him a sincerest condolences card from Poundland just after I had rejected him in front of everyone.
00:17:36
Speaker
It was hilarious.
00:17:38
Speaker
It wasn't hilarious for him, but definitely for the rest of us.
00:17:42
Speaker
I like to think I was avenging all the women he slept with and then ghosted.
00:17:46
Speaker
He blocked me after that, but then unblocked me a few months later, they always reappear, to say Merry Christmas and ask if I wanted to try being friends again.
00:17:59
Speaker
I then sent him a screenshot of a welcome back card and never heard from him again.
00:18:04
Speaker
Triple scrape raised and concluded...
00:18:08
Speaker
She already kind of really hurt all these guys' feelings more than we can in this small level.
Introduction to Female Dating Strategy Podcast
00:18:13
Speaker
Yeah, so this is almost a queen shit.
00:18:14
Speaker
This isn't even a roast to scro, this is just queen shit.
00:18:17
Speaker
So thanks for that triple stack roast, Jay.
00:18:20
Speaker
If you want to submit your own roast to scro, then subscribe to our Patreon, www.patreon.com forward slash the female dating strategy.
00:18:31
Speaker
And we will happily barbecue your scro to your liking.
00:18:35
Speaker
Let's start the show.
00:18:42
Speaker
What's up, queens?
00:18:43
Speaker
Welcome to the Female Dating Strategy Podcast, the meanest female-only podcast on the internet.
00:18:48
Speaker
I'm your host, Ro.
00:18:50
Speaker
And this is Savannah.
00:18:51
Speaker
And I'm Lola.
00:18:52
Speaker
Okay, so today's episode is a bit of a follow-up from an episode we did a few weeks ago called How to Level Up Your Pick Me Friends.
00:19:02
Speaker
One of the ideas that we ended that episode on was the idea that if you level up your pick-me friends, your friends might decide to spend more time with other friends or invest less in that relationship.
00:19:14
Speaker
And you might also have friends that are too toxic to remain friends with.
00:19:18
Speaker
And therefore, you might find yourself friendless.
00:19:22
Speaker
Not even just because of this, but sometimes people move and there's a lot of different life circumstances in which people end up without friends.
00:19:29
Speaker
So we had some people request that, hey, can you talk about how to meet new friends if you find yourself friendless?
00:19:37
Speaker
So Savannah, Lilith, and I all had different ideas about that that we were going to discuss in this episode.
00:19:42
Speaker
We're going to talk through the three essential phases of making friendships, which is one,
00:19:47
Speaker
how to meet people, two, how to break the ice, and three, how to follow up and maintain the friendship.
00:19:53
Speaker
And we'll discuss some of the challenges that people with different personality types face, like if you're an introvert versus an extrovert.
00:20:01
Speaker
So I'll kick off, and I'm quite an introverted person.
00:20:05
Speaker
I like being by myself.
00:20:07
Speaker
I'm like being around people can drain me quite a bit.
00:20:11
Speaker
But when I'm in social situations, I can hide that quite well.
00:20:15
Speaker
But generally speaking,
00:20:17
Speaker
I mean, I would classify myself as an introvert.
00:20:20
Speaker
I've had people say when they first met me, oh, I didn't know you could even speak at all.
00:20:25
Speaker
I just thought you were mute because I'm just so quiet.
00:20:27
Speaker
I can be very, very quiet and shy.
00:20:30
Speaker
So, I mean, one thing I would like to say, though, is if you are an introvert, unfortunately, there is really no way around making you friends.
00:20:38
Speaker
Apart from putting yourself out there.
00:20:40
Speaker
It's incredibly difficult and challenging if you're not really a social butterfly or if socialising doesn't come naturally to you, as it does to some people.
00:20:49
Speaker
But that's really the only way you can truly meet new people just on your wavelength is just to put yourself out there.
00:20:58
Speaker
And the thing is, most people are looking to make friends.
00:21:01
Speaker
I think that once you leave either school or college or university, it becomes exponentially more difficult to make friends.
00:21:10
Speaker
I mean, to even maintain the friendships that you've got, talk less about making new friends as well.
00:21:16
Speaker
I think we realise that we are only friends with a lot of people just because we see them around all the time.
00:21:22
Speaker
So, you know, once you're in a position where you don't see your friends every single day, it then becomes a lot more effort to maintain those friendships.
00:21:30
Speaker
Just to piggyback on what Savannah said, I see on the subreddit a lot women saying, oh, I'm an introvert.
00:21:36
Speaker
That's why I struggle to make friends.
00:21:38
Speaker
Or I'm an introvert.
00:21:38
Speaker
That's why I don't have many friends.
00:21:40
Speaker
And I just want to tell women every time I talk to a woman who says something like that, I want to just almost like shake her and be like, girl.
00:21:49
Speaker
You need to have friends.
00:21:50
Speaker
Like, even if you're an introvert, you have to go out there and make friends because you don't ever want to be in a situation where you're isolated or you're alone or you don't have anyone to, any woman in your life to rely on.
00:22:02
Speaker
I find women who are introverted are so much more vulnerable to...
00:22:07
Speaker
predatory men because in my experience anyways I've met women who are introverted they find a man who really for whatever reason they really like him and then they go off with him and he's like their one and only friend like he's there he's the only person they regularly interact with or are vulnerable with and so on and that can create a very dangerous situation if that man later turns out to be low value or even abusive so that's why it's important to have a network of
00:22:34
Speaker
women friends who will have your back if you're ever in that kind of situation.
00:22:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:22:38
Speaker
You don't want to put yourself in a position where you're easy to isolate.
00:22:41
Speaker
So that's like, that's the preamble of why this is important.
00:22:45
Speaker
Yeah.
00:22:45
Speaker
And also if you just want to live a good life, I mean, yeah.
00:22:49
Speaker
Yeah.
00:22:50
Speaker
Just having people around that you can resonate with who are interested in what you've got going on and you're invested in their life.
00:23:00
Speaker
is just a part of us being
Building Friendships and Community
00:23:02
Speaker
social creatures.
00:23:02
Speaker
So the first topic we wanted to cover was where to actually meet new friends.
00:23:08
Speaker
Savannah, where do you like to meet friends as an introvert?
00:23:11
Speaker
Okay, so what's worked for me is volunteering.
00:23:15
Speaker
All of my, actually majority of my high value friends I met during university when we were all volunteering on the same cause essentially.
00:23:26
Speaker
And what's good about volunteering is that if you're somebody who initially struggles to make conversation with people, it's really good because you have something to talk about because you're all there for the same reason.
00:23:41
Speaker
I think, I mean, it isn't always forward because there are people who do volunteer for the wrong reasons, but people who volunteer, they tend to be hardworking, empathetic, quite caring, and they tend to have all the qualities that would make someone a good friend.
00:23:57
Speaker
So that's what I found that really helped me at university was just volunteering, volunteering.
00:24:03
Speaker
And it's great for development generally as well, both personally and professionally.
00:24:07
Speaker
So, and the good thing about volunteering is that, well, at least in the UK, it shouldn't actually cost you anything to volunteer.
00:24:14
Speaker
You should never be out of pocket if you're a volunteer.
00:24:17
Speaker
So, yeah, it's a great way to give back to the community and also to grow and to be within a community of, you know, like-minded people, people who share the same values as you do.
00:24:28
Speaker
Yeah.
00:24:29
Speaker
I think volunteering is a great way to meet women, especially because women are more likely than men to volunteer.
00:24:35
Speaker
oh yeah 100 it's overwhelming it's overwhelmingly often a lot of like voluntary organizations are overwhelmingly staffed by women yeah as well um like really cool women really based women and also what i liked about volunteering is that i would meet women across all ages as well so women like based women in their 60s and 70s or young teenagers like you just meet all of them and it was just it was great
00:24:58
Speaker
That's so true, actually.
00:25:00
Speaker
You meet older women who are like your elders, who offer you guidance, and then you meet younger women and then you can be their elder or offer them guidance.
00:25:09
Speaker
It's so great.
00:25:10
Speaker
Yeah, it's great.
00:25:11
Speaker
It's great.
00:25:13
Speaker
So that was where I would meet people.
00:25:16
Speaker
That was my primary way of meeting people, was volunteering.
00:25:20
Speaker
Awesome.
00:25:21
Speaker
How about you, Lilith?
00:25:22
Speaker
Well, my favorite way of meeting people has probably been Toastmasters.
00:25:27
Speaker
Toastmasters is a international organization for improving people's public speaking.
00:25:34
Speaker
People often say that the two scariest things are death and public speaking, right?
00:25:37
Speaker
So Toastmasters helps you get over that fear of public speaking, right?
00:25:42
Speaker
So when I was a...
00:25:43
Speaker
You know, my parents didn't really socialize me super well when I was a teenager.
00:25:47
Speaker
So I had to force myself to learn those social skills.
00:25:51
Speaker
You know, in first and second and third year university, I got involved in Toastmasters.
00:25:55
Speaker
And it was such a great way of improving your speaking skills and also just meeting high quality people.
00:26:01
Speaker
Like the people who join Toastmasters are usually very ambitious.
00:26:05
Speaker
They have career goals.
00:26:06
Speaker
They want to, you know, in fact, not just Toastmasters, I'd say any...
00:26:10
Speaker
And activity that's geared towards self-improvement is going to attract a lot of high value people.
00:26:16
Speaker
And one of my closest friends, actually, that I've known for years, I met at Toastmasters.
00:26:21
Speaker
And so, and also the people at Toastmasters are super nice.
00:26:24
Speaker
Like they're...
00:26:25
Speaker
That's the thing.
00:26:26
Speaker
You join a club and everyone is just like instantly wants to be your friend.
00:26:29
Speaker
It's such a great environment for meeting new people.
00:26:33
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:33
Speaker
So this isn't an ad for Toastmasters or anything like that, but you know, they, they exist in 143 countries and there's like over 16,000 clubs all over the world.
00:26:44
Speaker
So, you know, unless you're in like a rural area out in the middle of nowhere, chances are there's probably a club near you.
00:26:51
Speaker
So yeah,
00:26:52
Speaker
Like, just honestly, like, go online, look up the nearest Toastmasters club near you and join, because that's probably the best thing that I've ever done for my social life, honestly.
00:27:01
Speaker
So I think that's a really good point, that finding an organization that's focused on self-help, self-improvement, you're more likely to find people who are able to take an introspective view of themselves.
00:27:14
Speaker
And people are more positive, right?
00:27:16
Speaker
Because you're all learning together, right?
00:27:18
Speaker
It's an environment where failure is comfortable.
00:27:21
Speaker
Yeah.
00:27:22
Speaker
Like everyone is so nice and so welcoming.
00:27:24
Speaker
I've honestly never met like a toxic or shitty person from Toastmasters.
00:27:29
Speaker
It's like everyone there is so wholesome.
00:27:31
Speaker
I love it.
00:27:32
Speaker
So yeah, if you want to meet nice people, I would say in my personal experience, I've met like dozens of great people and some of them are still my closest friends.
00:27:40
Speaker
So yeah, highly recommend Toastmasters.
00:27:43
Speaker
Nice.
00:27:44
Speaker
How about you, Ro?
00:27:45
Speaker
My tips for meeting people.
00:27:47
Speaker
So I actually for a long time had a job where I would travel.
00:27:51
Speaker
So I had to kind of perfect the art of meeting people and short notice and like having something to do.
00:27:59
Speaker
So I found that the best way to meet people is through activity focused activities.
00:28:06
Speaker
So most places will have some kind of local fun run.
00:28:10
Speaker
A lot of times the Nike store or Foot Locker or any type of athletic store will generally have posted social events that you can attend.
00:28:19
Speaker
So one of the things that you can do is
00:28:20
Speaker
they'll say, oh, we do a fun run every Wednesday at 6.30 p.m.
00:28:24
Speaker
And so that's a great way to just go and meet people.
00:28:28
Speaker
Also, if there's a professional organization that you belong to because you're in a professional, you can just figure out what's going on in that local chapter and be involved in that.
00:28:37
Speaker
There's also gym classes.
00:28:39
Speaker
Yeah, I find the gym is hard.
00:28:41
Speaker
It's like the highest level.
00:28:43
Speaker
Not the highest.
00:28:44
Speaker
It's a higher level difficulty for meeting people.
00:28:46
Speaker
Yeah.
00:28:47
Speaker
If you're going just to work out, I'm talking about specifically if you go to do classes.
00:28:50
Speaker
Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:28:52
Speaker
If you're doing like a spinning class every Sunday at 6, you know, then...
00:28:57
Speaker
then you're more likely to meet people.
00:28:59
Speaker
But that's, again, it comes down to consistency.
00:29:01
Speaker
Go to your local kickboxing or Brazilian jujitsu place.
00:29:06
Speaker
That's how you're going to meet badass bitches.
00:29:07
Speaker
This, I think, falls under the group activity focused on self-improvement.
00:29:11
Speaker
So this is another environment where failure is expected.
00:29:14
Speaker
And also you're meeting people who are focused on improving themselves in some way.
00:29:20
Speaker
The other way to do this is following people on social media who have shared interests.
00:29:25
Speaker
There's ways to connect on Facebook.
00:29:27
Speaker
Facebook has public events.
00:29:29
Speaker
If you have a particular thing you like, you can often just kind of start recognizing certain names and faces if you just comment a lot.
00:29:38
Speaker
So if you're a person that doesn't necessarily like to just go to a new place where you don't know anybody, a baby step is to be on social media enough and then cultivating certain interests to talk to people.
00:29:47
Speaker
Right.
00:29:47
Speaker
That is a really good point, actually, because I used to be like super into wrestling, like WWE.
00:29:53
Speaker
And I met a lot of people online who are still like my closest friends because we eventually met in real life through that community.
00:29:59
Speaker
I'm crying.
00:30:00
Speaker
Really?
00:30:01
Speaker
You were into WWE?
00:30:02
Speaker
I never knew that Savannah was into WWE.
00:30:07
Speaker
I was into WWE.
00:30:08
Speaker
Like my sister got me like for my 16th birthday.
00:30:11
Speaker
She got me like.
00:30:13
Speaker
front row seats to watch Joanna came to England.
00:30:15
Speaker
It was like the best day of my life.
00:30:17
Speaker
I'm dying.
00:30:19
Speaker
Okay, the concept of WWE is so weird to me.
00:30:22
Speaker
I was fully into WWE.
00:30:26
Speaker
It's clearly like acting, right?
00:30:27
Speaker
I don't know.
00:30:28
Speaker
It's just like wild.
00:30:30
Speaker
It's got like storylines and everything and like characters.
00:30:33
Speaker
It's like, I don't know.
00:30:33
Speaker
Yeah, it's just a soap opera for men.
00:30:35
Speaker
It's like a telenovela for men.
00:30:37
Speaker
Yeah, it's like modern day like gladiator fights.
00:30:40
Speaker
I don't know.
00:30:40
Speaker
It is super physical at the same time as well.
00:30:44
Speaker
I couldn't like be body slamming people 300 days of the year.
00:30:48
Speaker
And like that will that will fuck you up physically.
00:30:52
Speaker
So, yeah, that was how I also met some friends.
00:30:57
Speaker
That's hilarious to me.
00:31:03
Speaker
Like Savannah's eye here clothes lining people.
00:31:08
Speaker
Surprising, but delightful.
00:31:09
Speaker
Did you practice the moves on your friends?
00:31:11
Speaker
I mean, my brother would practice on me sometimes, but I wouldn't practice on my friends.
00:31:15
Speaker
Wait, what?
00:31:17
Speaker
Like, practice WWE moves on your friends.
00:31:20
Speaker
Oh, it's so much fun.
00:31:21
Speaker
It is.
00:31:22
Speaker
You just have to be safe, though, because, yeah.
00:31:24
Speaker
But it was so much fun.
00:31:25
Speaker
But boys especially, I think it's a lie that they're not influenced by violence on TV because every single boy I've ever met, like, WWE had a chokehold on them at some point in life where all they wanted to do was, like, clothesline each other and do, like... Or, like, give you, like, the tombstone pile driver or, like, the last ride or whatever finishing move it was.
00:31:43
Speaker
Right.
00:31:44
Speaker
So, yeah, social media.
00:31:45
Speaker
Yeah.
00:31:48
Speaker
Another way to meet people is if you work in the service industry.
00:31:52
Speaker
The easiest time for me to make friends was when I worked in the service industry for two reasons.
00:31:57
Speaker
One, because there's always people starting and quitting.
00:32:00
Speaker
So if you work retail, if you work in bars, you work in clubs, you work in waitstaff, there's always new people to meet.
00:32:04
Speaker
And obviously, there's always new customers, et cetera, that come in and you can work on your social skills and talking to people that way.
00:32:10
Speaker
The other benefit is that usually that workforce tends to be young-ish.
00:32:15
Speaker
So more than likely, if you're a person under 35 or so, it's a place where there's a lot of people of the same age versus some other professions where there's a lot of people of disparate ages.
00:32:24
Speaker
So you might not have as many people who are interested in going out, working in that environment.
00:32:31
Speaker
you're probably going to find people who have active lives.
00:32:33
Speaker
And so it's easier to work with them.
00:32:36
Speaker
If you don't have a reason to work in the service industry and you want to, you can always pick up like retail shifts during the holidays.
00:32:41
Speaker
That's the way to meet people.
00:32:42
Speaker
I think that's my contribution here.
00:32:45
Speaker
So yeah, those are Rose tips to meet new people.
00:32:47
Speaker
Okay.
00:32:47
Speaker
So you're now at your chosen destination.
00:32:50
Speaker
How would you suggest breaking the ice?
00:32:54
Speaker
Right.
00:32:55
Speaker
So straight up,
00:32:58
Speaker
Since joining FDS, the way that I like to meet or identify based queens in real life is if I'm in a group of women, I'll just straight up say an FDS-ism.
00:33:10
Speaker
And then make friends with any woman who responds positively to that.
00:33:14
Speaker
Yeah.
00:33:15
Speaker
I do find women absolutely love the word, screw.
00:33:18
Speaker
I'll say it out in the wild and they'll just think it's the best word they've ever heard.
00:33:21
Speaker
Yeah.
00:33:21
Speaker
They're like, I love that word.
00:33:23
Speaker
I just say, yeah, he's exact like a screw.
00:33:25
Speaker
And they just love it.
00:33:26
Speaker
If a woman's talking about like, oh, you know, I went on a date and he ghosted me, I'd be like, sis, if he wanted to, he would.
00:33:32
Speaker
Or dick is abundant and low value.
00:33:36
Speaker
That's another one.
00:33:36
Speaker
Dick is abundant and low value.
00:33:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:33:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:33:39
Speaker
So if I'm talking again, I only say this to a group of women.
00:33:42
Speaker
If there's men present, I, I'm more like aloof or I, I don't know, I'm more guarded.
00:33:46
Speaker
But when I'm in a group of women, that's when I will just let the FDS, FDS isms slip out.
00:33:52
Speaker
And most women actually love it.
00:33:54
Speaker
Even if they're sort of pick me, like, you know, they don't see that if they don't, sometimes there'll be a pick me and they don't realize I'm making fun of them.
00:34:03
Speaker
But a lot of times they'll hear that phrase and think like, yeah, you're right.
00:34:06
Speaker
And then, you know,
00:34:09
Speaker
Honestly, I find if you meet based queens in real life and you're honest about the fact that you're a based queen, they'll just be naturally drawn to you, right?
00:34:17
Speaker
Yeah.
00:34:17
Speaker
Yeah.
00:34:18
Speaker
Agreed.
00:34:20
Speaker
And also, it's a good vetting strategy because sometimes I've tried this and then every now and then there's always one woman who's like, well, not all men are like that and blah, blah, blah.
00:34:30
Speaker
If she says some pick-me-ass shit, that's how you know not to be friends with her.
00:34:34
Speaker
Straight up.
00:34:36
Speaker
Block and delete.
00:34:37
Speaker
Block and delete.
00:34:41
Speaker
How about you, Ro?
00:34:42
Speaker
How do you break the ice?
00:34:44
Speaker
So one of the conversations we had before we started recording was trying to discern why some people are having trouble making friends.
00:34:54
Speaker
Because as an extrovert, my go-to is just to go up and talk to people.
00:35:01
Speaker
So when we were talking about like how to create some breaking the ice tips, to me and for a lot of people who are extroverted, it seems pretty second nature that like, well, just go up to talk to people because if you're an extroverted person, that's just sort of a natural drive that you have.
00:35:13
Speaker
You seem you're naturally interested in people and you don't feel drained by those social interactions.
00:35:17
Speaker
So I think in the break the ice tips, we're going to focus a little bit more on how to
00:35:24
Speaker
Have a conversation if you're an introvert or a person who's not comfortable with cold approaching in the same way extroverts often are.
00:35:31
Speaker
So I'm an extroverted person and my biggest hurdle was actually not dominating conversations.
00:35:39
Speaker
So for me, I would just basically just go up to people and talk to them.
00:35:43
Speaker
And it's not a thing that intimidates me at all.
00:35:45
Speaker
So I guess it depends on the venue in which you meet them.
00:35:48
Speaker
So if you're meeting them at an event or at a class, then just go ahead and talk to them.
00:35:55
Speaker
Right?
00:35:56
Speaker
Like, just go up and say, hey, how's everything going?
00:35:59
Speaker
Especially if you're seeing them repeatedly, you can just say hello and then maybe talk about a shared interest.
00:36:07
Speaker
So what you're saying, though, for an introvert, they're going to be like, oh, just go up and talk to people.
00:36:11
Speaker
They're like, bitch, that's what I struggle with, right?
00:36:14
Speaker
Yeah.
00:36:15
Speaker
My advice to introverts as an extrovert is if you're an introvert, go find where the nicest looking extrovert is hanging out and then just go join that conversation.
00:36:26
Speaker
Because an evolved extrovert, a person who's not as interested in just dominating the conversation to do it, will often include you.
00:36:35
Speaker
Meaning like they'll come over or they'll at least stop to talk to recognize that you joined the circle and say, hey, how are you?
00:36:41
Speaker
You can figure out what they're talking about.
00:36:43
Speaker
Sometimes a side conversation might break out between people in the group that the extrovert has cultivated.
00:36:51
Speaker
So I would just look at extroverts as social lubricant if you're an introvert, meaning if you're an introvert and you just have a very hard time doing cold approaches, wait for the extroverts to do it.
00:37:01
Speaker
And then just kind of, you know, slowly saunter your way over and join whatever circle they're having and just say hello, right?
00:37:07
Speaker
So generally an extrovert, you'll know them because there'll be like five people standing around them.
00:37:12
Speaker
Just like having a conversation, you can just go talk to the person next to them and have a side conversation.
00:37:17
Speaker
And that's a way for you to talk to people without you having to make the initial contact, just kind of sneak in there.
00:37:24
Speaker
That's actually so true.
00:37:27
Speaker
I've been on both sides of that where I've been both the extrovert and the introvert, or either the extrovert or the introvert in that situation.
00:37:34
Speaker
But finding an extrovert, making friends with them, and then they will share all of your... If you're an introvert and you want to make friends, find an extrovert and they will share all of their friends with you.
00:37:46
Speaker
It's just, it's easy.
00:37:47
Speaker
Like, and I've shared my friends with people who are introverted too.
00:37:51
Speaker
I'm going to caveat this one as well, though.
00:37:53
Speaker
Like, I think it goes back to what, like, Rose said.
00:37:55
Speaker
They need to be an evolved extrovert, because otherwise what's going to happen is, if you're an introvert, you're just going to get drowned out by the conversation.
00:38:02
Speaker
There's an introvert who...
00:38:05
Speaker
can sometimes be quite intimidated by just going up to people.
00:38:10
Speaker
Like what's been successful for me is like non-verbal communication.
00:38:13
Speaker
So your body language, just having open body language, like giving someone a huge smile that can, that can prompt people to come up and want to talk to you.
00:38:22
Speaker
So if you don't feel, you know,
00:38:25
Speaker
for example, confident in approaching the extrovert.
00:38:30
Speaker
Because in all honesty, like sometimes even if somebody is friendly as an extrovert, they can also come across as quite intimidating if they're talking a lot.
00:38:38
Speaker
And this isn't anything the extrovert is doing.
00:38:40
Speaker
But when you see someone who's quite talkative and who is like clearly can like hold or like dominate a conversation, it can be quite, I guess, intimidating to try and like go into that extrovert.
00:38:52
Speaker
into that space and to try and contribute as an introvert.
00:38:56
Speaker
So even just giving someone a massive smile, um,
00:38:59
Speaker
it can make a massive difference.
00:39:00
Speaker
I mean, I've had people come over and talk to me once I've just given them a smile.
00:39:05
Speaker
And they think that I'm really confident, but I'm not.
00:39:07
Speaker
I'm just sort of like faking it till I make it sort of thing.
00:39:10
Speaker
I guess I should throw some suggested boundaries around for extroverts because like Savannah said, extroverts can sometimes really, really dominate a conversation and inadvertently turn people off and not know it.
00:39:22
Speaker
So I think if you're an extrovert,
00:39:25
Speaker
part of breaking the ice is not just going up and cold approaching people and then launching into a monologue.
00:39:30
Speaker
Unless you're uniquely funny, meaning like you could hold the room like an experienced comedian.
00:39:35
Speaker
Some people are like that, but a lot of people think they're like that when they're not.
00:39:38
Speaker
And so they're just talking and everyone's looking around uncomfortably like, um, when's this guy going to shut the fuck up?
00:39:43
Speaker
Yeah.
00:39:48
Speaker
Nobody wants to jump in and do anything else because then they don't want the spotlight on them.
00:39:51
Speaker
So then the extrovert just becomes like a focus of scorn of everyone's annoyance.
00:39:55
Speaker
But at the same time, it's a focused activity for everyone to do.
00:39:58
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:39:59
Speaker
So I think that's the caveat for extroverts is to make sure that you are actively including other people as part of your icebreaker.
00:40:06
Speaker
So it's not just you dominating the conversation, annoying everybody, and then trying to figure out why don't people want to hang out with me later.
00:40:14
Speaker
Right.
00:40:14
Speaker
So not that I know that from experience or anything, but
00:40:25
Speaker
That's why I think it's a good mix to be like a mix of an introvert and an extrovert.
00:40:29
Speaker
I find introverts are very good about asking, like introverts are often very good listeners.
00:40:34
Speaker
Extroverts are very bad listeners usually, but extroverts are very good at breaking the ice and introverts are generally bad at breaking the ice.
00:40:41
Speaker
So whether you're introverted or extroverted, I think it's a good mix.
00:40:45
Speaker
Like, I don't think there's one, you know, people tend to think of extroverts as like the ideal and introverts as something like there's wrong with, there's something wrong with them, but both have their strengths, both have their weaknesses.
00:40:54
Speaker
And it's something that you're going to have to work on as an individual.
00:40:58
Speaker
We need each other to teach each other.
00:40:59
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:41:01
Speaker
We both, both introverts and extroverts have something to learn from each other.
00:41:05
Speaker
Yes.
00:41:06
Speaker
Introverts unite.
00:41:08
Speaker
There's nothing wrong with you.
00:41:10
Speaker
Yeah.
00:41:10
Speaker
It's okay to be an introvert.
00:41:12
Speaker
Introverts.
00:41:15
Speaker
This is like some weird therapy session where it's like, it's okay to be you.
00:41:21
Speaker
And extroverts, it's okay to be less you.
00:41:24
Speaker
You can be less you sometimes.
00:41:27
Speaker
Introverts, it's okay to be yourself.
00:41:28
Speaker
Extroverts, stop being yourself.
00:41:31
Speaker
Be you, but just be a little bit less so other people can be them too.
00:41:36
Speaker
Or just be consistent because that's one thing that drives me crazy when I'm talking to someone.
00:41:40
Speaker
And I had an experience like this a few weeks ago where a friend of mine invited her scrote guy that she was seeing to a brunch session.
00:41:49
Speaker
And the whole time he was just talking about himself.
00:41:51
Speaker
He didn't ask me a single question.
00:41:53
Speaker
I was asking him questions.
00:41:55
Speaker
And he was talking about himself.
00:41:57
Speaker
And then he never stopped to ask any of us any questions.
00:42:00
Speaker
And afterwards, I, afterwards, I, you know, in the, the four part strategy thing where I'm talking about, um, you know, how, how to get your girl to break up with a shitty man.
00:42:10
Speaker
After that, I was like, yeah, it's really weird when a guy, you know, talks about himself and like, doesn't ask you any questions about yourself.
00:42:17
Speaker
Like, isn't that weird?
00:42:18
Speaker
And she, and that's what she's like, yeah, that is kind of weird.
00:42:21
Speaker
Actually.
00:42:22
Speaker
She stopped seeing him after that.
00:42:23
Speaker
So victory.
00:42:28
Speaker
Yeah.
00:42:28
Speaker
So that's another success story of my four part strategy.
00:42:31
Speaker
As much as some people don't like the strategy, it fucking works.
00:42:33
Speaker
Okay.
00:42:34
Speaker
So let's say you've met a person at an event, either a one time thing, or you've consistently talked to them over, you know, a number of weeks, and you want to make the leap from just a casual acquaintance that you know, to them actually
00:42:48
Speaker
actually being a friend.
00:42:50
Speaker
What are some tips to facilitate that process and follow up with that person to start to hang out outside of an already structured meeting place?
00:42:59
Speaker
I would say, I want to start off by saying that I personally do struggle when with one-off events.
00:43:05
Speaker
I have met people at one-off events a few times, but I do think it's like a higher level of difficulty when you're making friendships.
00:43:13
Speaker
So I think personally, I like
00:43:15
Speaker
repeating activities.
00:43:17
Speaker
So things like Toastmasters or what Savannah suggested with volunteering, it's something you do every week on a regular basis.
00:43:22
Speaker
And when you see someone on a regular basis, it's, you know, think about the friends you made at school and friends we made at work and so on.
00:43:29
Speaker
It's a lot easier to make friends with people you see frequently and to keep in touch with them.
00:43:33
Speaker
Even if you stop going to school or you stop working with them, just the fact that you already have that, uh, consistency in the back in the past is what makes it easier to stay in touch.
00:43:44
Speaker
Um,
00:43:45
Speaker
So be mindful that like with one-off events, it might be more challenging, but you can still meet amazing high quality people at one-off events.
00:43:51
Speaker
So it's still worth doing.
00:43:52
Speaker
It's just maybe a little bit more effort and maybe a little bit more, you know, you might feel awkward or like, oh, what if they think I'm weird or, you know, that kind of thing.
00:44:01
Speaker
Right.
00:44:01
Speaker
So, but it's something you just got to push through and just do it anyways.
00:44:05
Speaker
Push through the discomfort.
00:44:07
Speaker
You can just slide into the DMs like I did with ****.
00:44:11
Speaker
You slid in his DMs?
00:44:13
Speaker
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:44:15
Speaker
Slid in his DMs.
00:44:19
Speaker
I miss it.
00:44:23
Speaker
Savannah's all up in people's DMs.
00:44:26
Speaker
Savannah sliding into the DMs.
00:44:29
Speaker
We're going to dissect that at another date.
00:44:32
Speaker
At another time.
00:44:36
Speaker
Honestly, though, I do want to say just like a one-on-one with like as a semi-introvert, you might have a lot of self-conscious feelings like, oh, what if they think I'm weird?
00:44:46
Speaker
What if, you know, it's uncomfortable sometimes to put yourself out there, but you almost got to be like the extrovert and just be like shameless.
00:44:54
Speaker
Yeah.
00:44:55
Speaker
Just do it.
00:44:55
Speaker
Most people, if you approach them, they will actually be happy to be approached.
00:44:59
Speaker
Like, they're not having those thoughts in your head, those self-critical thoughts.
00:45:02
Speaker
You know, people tend to be their own harshest critics, right?
00:45:05
Speaker
So they're not thinking about you like you think about yourself.
00:45:08
Speaker
If you approach someone, most of the time they'll be like, they'll be happy that someone approached them, right?
00:45:12
Speaker
They're just as excited as you are to meet a new friend, right?
00:45:15
Speaker
Yeah.
00:45:17
Speaker
When you do finally meet someone and you want them to be not just an acquaintance, you want them to be an actual friend, it does take a consistent effort to keep in touch with them.
00:45:26
Speaker
And that's another maybe sort of area of improvement for me, something that I'm consciously working on, is that...
00:45:33
Speaker
Sometimes I'll just like, someone will text me and I'll just like either forget to text them back or, you know, if I haven't talked to someone in a long time and I'm meaning to talk to them, sometimes I procrastinate.
00:45:44
Speaker
So if you want to make new friends, it's not going to, people aren't just going to fall in your lap, right?
00:45:48
Speaker
It's not just going to happen unless you make it happen.
00:45:50
Speaker
And so that's why it's important to actually put in the work, just like with relationships, like romantic relationships, you have to make an effort to maintain it.
00:46:01
Speaker
And keep in touch.
00:46:02
Speaker
Yes, exactly.
00:46:03
Speaker
Okay.
00:46:03
Speaker
So my tips for how to follow up if you want to make a friend is, first of all, during the conversation, and this is something I think extroverts do pretty well, you kind of got to do a little bit of recon and fish for a little bit of info.
00:46:19
Speaker
And this is just part of getting to know people, right?
00:46:21
Speaker
In sales, we call that the discovery process.
00:46:23
Speaker
But yeah.
00:46:24
Speaker
Yeah.
00:46:25
Speaker
Right.
00:46:26
Speaker
So if you're an evolved extrovert and you're just not using it as an opportunity to monologue and you're actually having positive interaction with people, you start to break the ice by bridging different topics to see if there's any type of mutual interest, right?
00:46:39
Speaker
You can just start to...
00:46:41
Speaker
fish for info and just try to figure out where their interests lie.
00:46:43
Speaker
You can bring up the fact that, hey, there's a food festival going on in a couple of weeks and then see if that piques their interest.
00:46:52
Speaker
And if that piques their interest, then you can suggest going together like, hey, are you guys going to go together?
00:46:56
Speaker
Hey, do you have something to go with?
00:46:57
Speaker
Hey, what time are you guys going to go?
00:46:59
Speaker
The idea is to kind of have some working knowledge of what's going on in your city so that when you're talking to new people, you have a low investment way to get them to
00:47:11
Speaker
hang out with you outside of the venue you met them in.
00:47:14
Speaker
And that also provides an opportunity for you to actually plan and meet up somewhere else.
00:47:19
Speaker
Right.
00:47:20
Speaker
Another great way to do this is if you have like a mutual TV show that you guys like to watch.
00:47:24
Speaker
I find talking to people over TV shows is such a good way of making friends.
00:47:28
Speaker
Like fandom culture is if you're into any kind of like TV show or anything, there's going to be people out there who are also really into that thing and equally as obsessive as you are.
00:47:37
Speaker
Yeah.
00:47:38
Speaker
Like WWE.
00:47:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:47:44
Speaker
Right, and that's also a public event, though.
00:47:48
Speaker
So that's actually two birds with one stone, because you can either watch it at home, or you can buy tickets and go see it together.
00:47:54
Speaker
And you can meet people, yeah, at events, which is what I did.
00:47:56
Speaker
So a few weeks ago, true story, okay, I know I said that one-off events are hard, but this was like a serendipitous, like, magical moment.
00:48:03
Speaker
So a few weeks ago, I was on a date, and...
00:48:06
Speaker
the guy asked me about my favorite TV shows.
00:48:08
Speaker
And I started talking about this TV show I'm obsessed with called Magnificent Century.
00:48:13
Speaker
And I was talking about this show.
00:48:15
Speaker
And then this lady at the table next to me was like, oh my gosh, you watch Magnificent Century too?
00:48:20
Speaker
Like it's this Turkish TV show.
00:48:22
Speaker
So it's like kind of like Game of Thrones, but set in the Ottoman Empire.
00:48:26
Speaker
So it's not something that, you know, I guess in the Western audience would normally be watching.
00:48:31
Speaker
But anyway, so she was at the table next to me.
00:48:33
Speaker
This lady, she's like, oh my gosh, you watch Magnificent Century too?
00:48:36
Speaker
And I was like, no way.
00:48:37
Speaker
And we both were like, ah!
00:48:38
Speaker
And we both talked about... And so we've just been texting.
00:48:41
Speaker
We ended up hanging out later that night.
00:48:43
Speaker
I left my date to hang out with this chick.
00:48:46
Speaker
And I'm not talking to that guy anymore, but I'm still friends with that girl, right?
00:48:49
Speaker
So I find talking about TV shows, especially if you're really obsessed with something and the other person's also obsessed with something, like...
00:48:57
Speaker
It's magic.
00:48:57
Speaker
Like you'll become the best of friends.
00:48:59
Speaker
Yeah.
00:48:59
Speaker
So for people that have to make friends in a short period of time where you're doing it in a one-off event, having a working knowledge of what's going on in the city is always a great way to create a scenario in which you would see this person outside of your normal meeting place.
00:49:16
Speaker
Because I've gone to cities and I've been like, hey, I'm in town for a little bit.
00:49:20
Speaker
What's going on?
00:49:21
Speaker
Right.
00:49:22
Speaker
And so just asking people like, hey, what's going on out here and seeing if they have any type of suggestion and then saying like, hey, are you going to this?
00:49:30
Speaker
Are you doing something like just get in the habit of actually asking people what they're into and where they're going and then not being afraid to ask, like, do you mind if I join you or do you want to meet there, etc.?
00:49:44
Speaker
The other one was sliding in the DMs, right?
00:49:47
Speaker
Savannah's strategy.
00:49:49
Speaker
Sliding in them DMs.
00:49:51
Speaker
I just think like the cold approach is a bit creepy.
00:49:53
Speaker
But after you've been to like an event with somebody and you've got a good rapport, there's nothing wrong with going into the little DMs group, like doing a little slide tackle to the DMs.
00:50:04
Speaker
Follow up.
00:50:04
Speaker
Just a little follow up.
00:50:06
Speaker
Slide in the DMs.
00:50:07
Speaker
Just send them a quick message.
00:50:09
Speaker
Just, you know, make friends with them.
00:50:11
Speaker
Just talking to them.
00:50:13
Speaker
Sorry, I just wanted to.
00:50:18
Speaker
Sorry, Rose.
00:50:19
Speaker
No, no, it's funny.
00:50:20
Speaker
So if you had a mutual interest in something, then the easiest way to slide in the DMs is to be like, oh, hey, I found this article on this.
00:50:27
Speaker
topic yeah sharing something with sharing memes with them that's another way i make friends yeah i can yeah i can say honestly that the dm's tactic is i've had great success with it so that's just savannah flexing i've had great success with the sliding in the dm strategy flexing them introvert introvert tactics that's not even a weird flex that's like that's good flex okay
00:50:54
Speaker
So one last idea that we wanted to talk about while we're on the subject of meeting people over shared interests is what is it
Dynamics of Friendship and Social Circles
00:51:04
Speaker
like?
00:51:04
Speaker
What's the dynamic like when you meet someone, when you love something versus when you hate something?
00:51:09
Speaker
This goes back to our idea of always presenting, you know, your most evolved and authentic self.
00:51:14
Speaker
Because you can meet people in places that are more positively focused.
00:51:19
Speaker
And I think most of the things that we discussed were positively focused.
00:51:22
Speaker
But you can also meet people in places that are more negatively focused.
00:51:25
Speaker
And what I mean by that is, like, if you're politically active and you're, you know, you're being active against some kind of perceived injustice.
00:51:33
Speaker
I know there's a lot of people that are very, very involved in volunteering for different types of campaigns, doing...
00:51:38
Speaker
Like social justice related type stuff.
00:51:41
Speaker
Social justice related type things.
00:51:43
Speaker
And those are always really great.
00:51:44
Speaker
I mean, I think it's really great to be active in your community, but I think always like finding, I actually have found when I've been involved in groups like that, it's been harder to find like a positive balance to those friendships.
00:51:56
Speaker
So if you do meet people in those kinds of contexts where you're focused on like some kind of social change or a topic you're passionate about that can sometimes be very heavy or negative.
00:52:06
Speaker
And sometimes, you know, sometimes
00:52:08
Speaker
Same thing when you're volunteering, actually.
00:52:09
Speaker
If you're volunteering, say, at like a battered women's shelter, which I've done on occasion, it can be really, really, really taxing.
00:52:16
Speaker
It's emotionally like a lot.
00:52:18
Speaker
Yeah, it's emotionally a lot.
00:52:19
Speaker
It can be emotionally taxing.
00:52:20
Speaker
And then if you're not careful, you can bring that dynamic outside of the focus.
00:52:26
Speaker
You can bring that dynamic outside of the actual volunteering space.
00:52:30
Speaker
And then that becomes like the basis of your friendship, which isn't always like fun and can feel a little bit draining.
00:52:36
Speaker
Actually, I was reading an article quite recently, actually, on how, and I'll drop this in the episode notes as well, but it was like the right kind of stress can bond your team together.
00:52:46
Speaker
And the idea is that a certain type of stress can actually potentially bond people together for life if the team...
00:52:56
Speaker
Approach it together and through the right lens as well.
00:52:59
Speaker
So it's part of the reason why I'm not sure if you have this in the US or Canada, but here, like team building activities are often things like, for example, like kayaking or...
00:53:14
Speaker
or like orienteering or something that can be quite stressful because there is some evidence to support the fact that actually a certain amount of stress can actually bond people together in a really positive way.
00:53:29
Speaker
And I've noticed this with my work colleagues as well.
00:53:32
Speaker
We've been working on a certain social justice course for some time.
00:53:38
Speaker
And even though it can be quite...
00:53:42
Speaker
like demoralising at times like trying to you know it feels like we're trying to bail water out of the Atlantic but it's actually made us really close as a group of colleagues in other ways as well that's like beyond the scope of the project it's just like this it's just like this FDS podcast can be stressful but that's how we've all bonded
00:54:03
Speaker
And to be fair with FDS, like we've made an effort to make sure that it doesn't become, it doesn't devolve into just constant toxic negativity with men.
00:54:11
Speaker
And I think that's just the caveat that we're trying to stress is that when you're dealing, if you're in a group for which...
00:54:18
Speaker
the focal point can sometimes be anti something or it can be, or the subject matter that you're dealing with is heavy and can be at times depressing is you'll have to do a little bit more work to flip those friendships, to be more well-rounded.
00:54:32
Speaker
So it's not just like you sitting around, uh,
00:54:35
Speaker
being in this heavy energy all the time or like this energy where you're always focused on a really depressing problem that probably is going to take years, if not decades, if not centuries to solve.
00:54:45
Speaker
So finding that balance is making sure that when you're talking to people that it's not just focused on the cause, really take an interest in the things that they're interested outside of the cause that you're focused on.
00:54:59
Speaker
And then
00:55:00
Speaker
Make sure that you meet them in venues that are completely unrelated so that you guys have opportunities to bond with each other as people and not just around a specific social cause.
00:55:10
Speaker
I've experienced a similar phenomenon as like this team building stress that Savannah talked about.
00:55:15
Speaker
I've experienced that in various like working environments.
00:55:20
Speaker
I don't want to.
00:55:21
Speaker
say what my actual job is, but having worked in high-pressure, fast-paced working environments in the past, I find some workplaces can be really toxic, and I don't stay there for long.
00:55:34
Speaker
It's just like...
00:55:36
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:55:36
Speaker
Like, it can just be really toxic.
00:55:38
Speaker
There's like all these fucking psychopaths fighting each other out, duking it out, trying to, it's like Game of Thrones shit.
00:55:44
Speaker
And then there's other environments where there's almost this sense of like, oh, as a team, we vanquished this, you know, this problem kind of thing.
00:55:53
Speaker
Right.
00:55:54
Speaker
So, you know, rather than be like, wow, fuck these fucking customers.
00:55:57
Speaker
Fuck these clients.
00:55:59
Speaker
All assholes.
00:56:00
Speaker
I hate these people.
00:56:01
Speaker
It's like, yeah, we, we got over this rush together, you know, kind of thing.
00:56:06
Speaker
Right.
00:56:06
Speaker
So, um, yeah, be my, sometimes the energy is already there and sometimes you can create that energy, um,
00:56:14
Speaker
But yeah, it's a really case, I'd say it's a case by case scenario that you have to assess for yourself.
00:56:18
Speaker
Yeah, so that's the caveat of making work friends is that if you're in an environment that's very heavily competitive, it can be harder to make friends in that kind of environment because people don't trust you, right?
00:56:27
Speaker
It doesn't lend itself to having a trust environment, which is required to make friendships.
00:56:32
Speaker
So I think what Lilith said is similar to the point we just made about making friends in an environment that's focused on a cause.
00:56:39
Speaker
Same thing applies when you meet people at work, that sometimes if the work environment is negative, then that negativity will be brought into the relationship.
00:56:48
Speaker
And then work adds an additional element that it may be competitive, in which case you may not know if you can trust work.
00:56:55
Speaker
the people on your team to have your best interest at heart and makes it a little bit more difficult.
00:57:00
Speaker
So be aware of those things when you're trying to make friends in the work environment.
00:57:05
Speaker
But like, like Lila said, these toxic environments, a lot of times aren't worth it.
00:57:09
Speaker
So sometimes it's better to just go to another company if you can, where it's less competitive and there's more of a team building atmosphere and you'll find yourself making better quality friends and having a better quality of life overall.
00:57:23
Speaker
Yeah, that's how you avoid toxic people who, like, stab you in the back.
00:57:26
Speaker
It's just, like, don't make friends with competitive, crazy, stab-you-in-the-back people in environments that incentivize that behavior.
00:57:36
Speaker
But...
00:57:38
Speaker
So that's just the drawbacks of dealing with people is that you have some people that are pretty friendly, more or less just interested in connecting with people on shared interests.
00:57:48
Speaker
And then you have people that are – they're always working a room.
00:57:50
Speaker
They always have an angle.
00:57:52
Speaker
There's always some kind of politics involved.
00:57:54
Speaker
And so I think –
00:57:56
Speaker
We want to focus on building authentic friendships and as much as possible, weeding out people who see you as like a pawn in their game, whatever they're playing.
00:58:05
Speaker
Because you don't want to know with toxic friendships, like I described in our how to level up your pick me friends.
00:58:11
Speaker
And often...
00:58:13
Speaker
And often that's kind of how it starts, right?
00:58:15
Speaker
You make friends with someone you think you're having an authentic connection with only to find out like this is a person who can't have authentic connections with people because they're wrapped up in something else.
00:58:24
Speaker
A lot of times a man, but sometimes it can be work environment.
00:58:27
Speaker
I find that making new friends is a lot like gardening in that it's not just about what you're actually growing.
00:58:33
Speaker
but it's also about what you take away through pruning or weeding, so to speak.
00:58:39
Speaker
So going out into any environment, there's going to be some amazing high value people.
00:58:46
Speaker
Those are the ones you want to connect with, obviously.
00:58:50
Speaker
When you spot red flags, those are people that you need to prune or weed out of your life in order for you to have a friendship circle that's like a beautiful garden.
00:58:59
Speaker
Yeah.
00:58:59
Speaker
And to continue with that, everybody doesn't have to be
00:59:04
Speaker
everything to you.
00:59:05
Speaker
I think sometimes we're looking for a person who we can call our BFF and then post same outfits on Instagram and try to present an image like you're these inseparable BFFs.
00:59:19
Speaker
And having acquaintances as friends is just as valuable as having a singular person who you feel like you can tell and do everything with.
00:59:28
Speaker
And just understand that people have limitations and that...
00:59:32
Speaker
You know, you can't necessarily expect one person to be everything to you all the time.
00:59:36
Speaker
So I have certain friends who we might have a shared interest in one thing, but they may not understand anything else about certain other aspects of my life.
00:59:44
Speaker
Yeah.
00:59:45
Speaker
Yeah.
00:59:46
Speaker
And that and so understanding that will also help you create a more diverse relationship.
00:59:50
Speaker
friend group if you just sort of learn how to slot people in your life based on their ability to invest in you and their ability and their actual overall interest i almost feel like the saying it takes a village to raise was it a child it i think it should be it takes a village to raise a person because it's absolutely true just like just have a village around you yeah i think that that is that's so important
01:00:14
Speaker
Especially when it comes to more intimate topics.
01:00:16
Speaker
Like I have some friends who I would maybe talk about my sex life with, but they wouldn't understand anything about my profession.
01:00:22
Speaker
Right.
01:00:23
Speaker
And then vice versa.
01:00:25
Speaker
Yeah.
01:00:25
Speaker
It's okay to have different friends.
01:00:26
Speaker
Like I have like a hiking friend.
01:00:28
Speaker
I have like a TV show obsessed friend.
01:00:31
Speaker
I have, you know, my travel friend, like, you know, you can have different friends for different like...
01:00:35
Speaker
you know, parts of your life, right?
01:00:38
Speaker
You know, life isn't like a, you know, Hollywood movie where it's like four lifelong female friends, you know, they've known each other since kindergarten and share everything with each other, go on a road trip together.
01:00:49
Speaker
You know, sometimes it's like...
01:00:51
Speaker
I don't know.
01:00:52
Speaker
Like it's not as always as glamorous as that the process of making friends in real life, but it's totally worth it.
01:00:58
Speaker
And I find actually better compartmentalizing your social life, compartmentalizing your social life and having good boundaries.
01:01:08
Speaker
So sometimes you might meet a person who you like, but you're like, this person, I don't necessarily trust with the more intimate parts of myself.
01:01:15
Speaker
And it might not be,
01:01:17
Speaker
It might not be like a person that you need to completely cut off because they're a total horrible person or anything like that, but maybe they're just like a loud mouth, right?
01:01:25
Speaker
Like there's plenty of really nice but loud mouth people.
01:01:28
Speaker
So in that case, you just draw boundaries with them.
01:01:30
Speaker
It doesn't mean like, oh, I can't be like nice with this loud mouth person.
01:01:33
Speaker
It just means like, okay, there's certain things I wouldn't share with this particular person.
01:01:38
Speaker
And just understanding what you need out of a relationship in relation to what that person can actually give you is important.
01:01:46
Speaker
And that'll help you know when to prune and how to prune when you need to prune your friendships.
01:01:51
Speaker
Yes.
01:01:51
Speaker
So those are some tips on where to meet people, how to break the ice, and then how to follow up with them to continue the friendship relationship, as well as some caveats on when you meet people involved in a social cause or meet people at work.
01:02:06
Speaker
So that's our show.
01:02:07
Speaker
Please check out our website at thefemaledatingstrategy.com as well as our Patreon, patreon.com forward slash thefemaledatingstrategy where we have weekly bonus content.
01:02:16
Speaker
And this week we dropped an episode on the kid's guide to roasting.
01:02:20
Speaker
So if you want to learn how to roast like an FDSer, check out that episode or a child slash FDSer because they have some wicked tips.
01:02:31
Speaker
I think we even picked up a few tips.
01:02:33
Speaker
I think we picked up a few tips from that.
01:02:36
Speaker
Yeah.
01:02:37
Speaker
Check it out.
01:02:38
Speaker
And also you can interact with us on our newly added discord server.
01:02:42
Speaker
So if you're at the queen or the level up tier, you can chat with us.
01:02:48
Speaker
We're getting some, we're getting into some pretty interesting discussions there.
01:02:51
Speaker
A lot of people have a lot of input on future topics, suggestions for the show, as well as additional information on some of the things we address in the episode.
01:02:59
Speaker
So if you want to chat with us, please sign up for one of those tiers.
01:03:02
Speaker
Yeah.
01:03:03
Speaker
Also, you can follow us on Twitter at fem.strat.
01:03:06
Speaker
And each of us now has our own Twitter page as well.
01:03:09
Speaker
So it's just our names underscore FDS.
01:03:12
Speaker
So Roe underscore FDS, Savannah underscore FDS, Lilith underscore FDS.
01:03:18
Speaker
Lilith one.
01:03:18
Speaker
Lilith one.
01:03:19
Speaker
Lilith one underscore FDS.
01:03:20
Speaker
Yeah.
01:03:20
Speaker
Right.
01:03:21
Speaker
I forgot about that.
01:03:22
Speaker
It's a statement.
01:03:23
Speaker
Lilith one.
01:03:25
Speaker
Noun, verb.
01:03:26
Speaker
Yeah.
01:03:29
Speaker
It is a fact.
01:03:30
Speaker
Right.
01:03:31
Speaker
Underscore FDS.
01:03:33
Speaker
Thanks for listening, Queens.
01:03:34
Speaker
And for all you scrotes out there to quote WWE superstar Dwayne The Rock Johnson.
01:03:39
Speaker
Shut up, bitch.
01:03:40
Speaker
Die mad.
01:03:41
Speaker
See you next week.
01:03:44
Speaker
Bye.