Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Abandoned at a Train Station: Stephanie Fast’s Story of Survival
33 Plays14 days ago
Stephanie Fast’s life began with abandonment, uncertainty, and survival on the streets of Korea. In this deeply personal conversation with Jackie Darby, she shares how being left alone at a train station as a young child began a journey that would ultimately transform into a story of faith and redemption.
Stephanie discusses her search for identity and why she wrote She Is Mine—a book intended to preserve her legacy for her children and bring awareness to the millions of orphans still waiting for a forever home.
Her story is a powerful reminder that even the most broken beginnings can lead to extraordinary purpose.
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to Adoption and Parenting Podcast
00:00:02
Speaker
We all have a story, and at times we feel we're walking it out alone. Let's pause and think. Join us for honest conversations about adoption and parenting as we lament, encourage, give hope, and explore our true identity and worth in Christ.
00:00:23
Speaker
Hi, my name is Jackie Darby and welcome to another episode of Pause and Think.
Meet Stephanie Fast, Author of 'She Is Mine'
00:00:29
Speaker
Today is such a special time because I am so honored to have a very special guest with us, Stephanie Fast. And so Stephanie is an international speaker, and she is also the author of a book called She Is Mine. It's about an orphan's incredible journey of survival.
00:00:54
Speaker
So Stephanie, welcome. Thank you so much. What's an It's such an honor to be with you. I feel like we're sisters, right? Yes, of course. Yes, we are. And so i don't want to do a lot of talking because because you truly have an incredible story. And I want to give plenty of time for our viewers and our listeners to hear your story today.
Purpose of 'She Is Mine' and Overcoming Trauma
00:01:20
Speaker
So let's dive in and go ahead and start telling your story, Stephanie.
00:01:26
Speaker
Well, thank you. Hopefully each person picks up the book. um You know, she is mine because that sort of tells the full story. There's no way I can share all the stories that's in the book.
00:01:40
Speaker
But that story was actually written not only because I wanted people to understand my story, but I wanted my children and my grandchildren to understand the legacy that they have.
00:01:52
Speaker
Because as you know, as adoptees, when we start having children, our legacy basically starts with us. We don't have parents and grandparents that we can look back to, at least, you know, biological parents and grandparents where we can say, Oh, you get your traits from that or, oh, you get your history from that. So I just really, really wanted in my children to understand their legacy that started with me and the power of God that that can work in anyone's life, no matter what their past and what their trauma is.
00:02:25
Speaker
Thirdly, I wanted to write the book for people like us that have gone through adoption that are still orphans, actually, because as you know, there are millions and millions of orphans around the world that still needs a forever home.
Stephanie's Origins and Discoveries through DNA
00:02:41
Speaker
So that's why I wrote the story. And as you could tell by looking at me that I look very similar to you. i was born in South Korea right after the war.
00:02:53
Speaker
Like many international adoptees, I don't really know my full age. I don't know What day I was born, what year I was born, what city I was born. I know a lot of international adoptees come to America with papers, but oftentimes they're not accurate. You know, the orphanages or adoption agencies basically just have to write what they know, and it may not be totally accurate. So, you know, we start off with that. We don't even know our foundation of where we came from.
00:03:26
Speaker
and why we were conceived. um i My father is a foreigner or a Western man. I thought he was an American soldier for years and years and years, and that's what I wrote in my book.
00:03:40
Speaker
But about a few years ago, I did a DNA. And when I did my DNA, I found out my father was British, not British American, but British British.
00:03:51
Speaker
And to the fact that they could trade his Ancestry back for four generations, having lived in greater London area. So I don't know what that entails, but, ah you know, he was a British that either fought in the Korean War or came over as a diplomatic representative.
Abandonment at a Train Station
00:04:10
Speaker
I don't really know.
00:04:11
Speaker
I don't know too much about my mom, except I have vague memories of living with her. But even in the home that I lived in with her, there was it was like a family unit. There was a grandparents there and maybe aunts and uncles, at least other relatives that I'm sure were part of the family.
00:04:29
Speaker
But even in that family, I knew i was different. I knew I was not accepted. And I knew my mother was being pressured all the time because my memory of my mom was that she was sad.
00:04:42
Speaker
I don't ever remember her being happy. And so I think that if you know anything about Asian history and just how they perceived biracial children, I think she had to make a decision of whether she was gonna lose her family and try to make a life with just me, or she had to separate herself from me and create a life for her future.
00:05:07
Speaker
So my memory actually begins. I mean, my I have that memory, but the actual memory of my journey begins with my mom taking me to a train station, putting me on a train with the promise that a relative was going to meet me on the other side.
00:05:25
Speaker
I don't know if she knew the outcome. I cannot tell her story. That's just, it's between her and God. But I ended up at a train station where there was no uncle.
00:05:36
Speaker
And there was no agencies that came and rescued me. So at the age of maybe four or five or maybe older, I'm not really sure, I began a life of abandonment that lasted for anywhere from two to three years.
Survival on the Streets and Society's View
00:05:54
Speaker
Again, I remember seasons, but I cannot tell you years. I can tell you abuse, but I can't tell you the reasons why. I remember starving to death. I remember being so cold that I thought I was going to die. I remember just constantly being abused.
00:06:12
Speaker
Now, when you're a child, people say to me, well, how do you remember all those stories? And I say, well, it's not so much that I remember the full stories. My life is like a slideshow.
00:06:24
Speaker
You know I have a memory and it cuts off there why those memories came to being. But after doing a lot of study and going back to Korea and talking to a lot of people and trying to understand the Korean culture, I realized that being what the they had a name for a little girl like me, which was Tugi. The nice translation would be half-breed.
00:06:47
Speaker
I think nowadays they call them Hapa, which means half. But back then they called me Tugi. twogi And I had a Korean pastor that told me one time that actually when they said that, they thought of me as being nothing and from dust.
00:07:04
Speaker
So I was considered a non-person as far as they were concerned. So it makes you understand a little bit of why they would abuse me that way they did.
00:07:15
Speaker
I suppose any of us, when we're in sin and in pain and in our own trauma, and we see a reflection of something that we want to forget, we try to erase that from our vision, right? So I do really believe the Koreans that abused me were not cruel people. I just think they were in their own pain and in their own confusion.
00:07:37
Speaker
and in their own ignorance. So I have learned to forgive them and to let go and to release any judgments that I have towards them, but it took years for that to happen.
00:07:49
Speaker
um Yes. yeah Yeah, for sure. i can't even imagine. um So Stephanie, you were orphaned from little on and your life basically began as an orphan in the streets after your mom put you on the train. And so tell us how you ended up from the streets going through all that trauma into an orphanage.
00:08:18
Speaker
Right.
Rescue by Swedish Nurse and Divine Intervention
00:08:19
Speaker
Well, two miracle stories. One was there was a Swedish nurse that had come to Korea to set up a baby clinic. And she was working with World Vision at that time.
00:08:30
Speaker
And she was going home one day. This is a story that was conveyed to my parents. She was going home one day. And for some odd reason, she decided to go through what she called garbage lane.
00:08:43
Speaker
In the edge of lot of cities, there's, you know, the landfill where the garbage is taken. And as she was walking through garbage lane and she heard a groan and she came over to where the groan was and it was me.
00:08:56
Speaker
Now, I cannot tell you how I got there. I don't know if someone found me and decided i was just, again, a piece of garbage and that was a great place to throw me. Or if somehow I wandered there myself, I can't tell you, but I was found on a garbage pile.
00:09:13
Speaker
And this nurse at the beginning, although she had great compassion, i was by that time, maybe seven or eight years of age, and there was no room for me in her clinic.
00:09:25
Speaker
And that summer there was a cholera epidemic sweeping through South Korea and I had the beginning stages of cholera. So she realized that maybe she couldn't help me. So she was actually going to get up and leave.
00:09:38
Speaker
But she said two things happened that changed her mind. One was as she's getting up, her legs became so heavy. She just couldn't, like, she couldn't figure out why her legs weren't moving to walk away. And as she's trying to figure out why her body is malfunctioning, she said she heard an audible voice.
00:09:58
Speaker
Now, you need to realize this nurse is a very quiet, Lutheran missionary. She's not one that goes around declaring, thus saith the Lord, right? and But she heard an audible voice, and it said three words, she is mine.
00:10:17
Speaker
Yeah. well Isn't that amazing?
00:10:21
Speaker
That is so amazing, Stephanie. And I just want to jump in and let the listeners know that when I heard you speak for the very first time through um a a radio show of Focus on the Family and you were telling your story,
00:10:45
Speaker
I was listening to your story for the very first time, feeling like there's somebody in this world who understands what I'm thinking and what's in my heart and mind. Because i too, was found in the garbage dump of Korea. And I know we had talked. I've shared with you that, you know, my story was that a missionary nurse found me, too. And I can't help but think that it's the same missionary nurse yeah who found us both and took us in, rescued us, and took us to the orphanage. But how God used her and how you said that he spoke three words, she is mine, which is the title of your book. Because if it wasn't for that nurse, um just being obedient to the call of God in her life and being
00:11:42
Speaker
literally in the garbage, in the trenches with with children, like babies like us, who absolutely needed the hand of our Heavenly Father to come in and physically rescue us.
00:11:58
Speaker
um That just is so amazing. And it tells so much of our Heavenly Father, So continue telling our listeners um how you ended up in the orphanage with this, you know, the nurse taking you there.
00:12:13
Speaker
Yeah, she rescued me and she took me back to her baby clinic and pretty much did all the things that needed to be done so that I would survive. And when I was healthy enough, she placed me in a World Vision orphanage. And i didn't know, but she kept her eyes on me.
00:12:31
Speaker
You know I didn't see her so much after that. But the back story is she kept an eye on me, wondering what was going happen to me. And I was in that orphanage for
Adoption by American Couple and Initial Resistance
00:12:41
Speaker
about two years. And at that time, World Vision really, really emphasized Christianity to the children.
00:12:48
Speaker
And we were made actually to go to church every Sunday. And in church, I heard about Jesus, but like you, when you have such a wounded spirit and you know nothing but trauma, to hear that Jesus loves you is really hard to comprehend.
00:13:06
Speaker
And when you're young, you know when you're eight or nine years old, you know our cognitive brain doesn't work very well. We just live our life according to experience, right? And so for me, I could not comprehend the love of Jesus.
00:13:22
Speaker
But I still like going to church. I still like all the Bible stories. And at that time, there weren't that many foreigners in Korea. There American soldiers. And I thought my dad was an American soldier. So like all little orphans or street children, if we saw American soldiers, we would run after them. And we had three words that we knew in English. One was, you're a monkey, because they all had bodily hair. You know, we Asians don't have much hair. So they were sort of labeled as monkeys, you know. So we would say, you are a monkey. And then second thing we would say is, give me candy, know.
00:14:00
Speaker
And third thing we would say is, I love ah you. I don't know where I learned that, but I learned those three phrases really easy when I lived on the streets. So I knew what American soldiers looked like and I knew what Miss Erickson looked like.
00:14:14
Speaker
But beyond that, I did not see too many foreigners. But one day, the orphanage director said, there is an American couple coming to our orphanage and they want to look at all the baby boys.
00:14:28
Speaker
Now, I didn't know what adoption was. But I thought I knew what America was, because if you said the word America to a Korean at that time, it would be like us telling little children that, you know, we're taking them to Disneyland or we're taking them somewhere exotic. Right.
00:14:44
Speaker
Because America, no one starved in America, I thought. Everybody had a beautiful house. Everybody had a beautiful family. So I just thought, oh, one of these boys is going to America. Isn't that great?
00:14:56
Speaker
So we waited for this couple to come. And I describe them in my book as Mr. and Mrs. Goliath. Because I never saw such big people in my whole life. Now, remind I need to remind the audience, of I'm about nine years old around this time. But I weigh just a little over 30
00:15:18
Speaker
I have a grandchild that is less than a year old and she weighs 23 pounds. So you can sort of somehow, you know put those two together and wait.
00:15:29
Speaker
And I had still the effects from being in the on the streets. The orphanage did not take the time to really take care of a lot of the physical needs that I had.
00:15:41
Speaker
Of course, they fed me and they put a roof over my head and put clothes on my back. But beyond that, I still had lice in my hair. i still had a lazy eye. I still had scabs and boils and, you know, scars from my childhood. But, um,
00:15:56
Speaker
Mr. and Mrs. Goliath came. And I remember watching, especially Mr. Goliath, because in my book, I talk about all the abuses that I received as a child. And most of them were by the hands of men or older boys. I was afraid of men.
00:16:12
Speaker
um But I watched this giant of a man go down to little Moses basket, pick up a baby. And as he was loving on that baby, what I saw was tears coming down his eyes.
00:16:26
Speaker
My little broken brain could not comprehend it. I could not put two and two together. So without realizing it, guess I was going closer and closer to where he was.
00:16:37
Speaker
And he saw me from the corner of his eyes. And I'll never forget, he put that baby down. He turned around and he came to where I was. And this giant, Mr. Goliath, came way down to where this little 30-pound little girl was.
00:16:54
Speaker
And I can still, when I close my eyes, I can still see myself. And I can still remember that scenario of him reaching out his big, enormous hand and putting it on my face just like this and stroking me.
00:17:11
Speaker
My heart still beats today when I remember that memory. And I remember my heart doing a flip. You know, like something is different here, but I didn't know how to respond. So I responded in the only way I knew how, and I yanked the hand off my face and I literally spit in his face.
00:17:34
Speaker
Now, there are adopted parents listening. What would you have done if you had gone overseas with a desire of adopting some baby that's healthy and brilliant and smart, and this girl spits on you.
00:17:54
Speaker
They went home. I thought for sure the orphanage director was going to kill me, but nothing happened. And the next morning, Mr. and Mrs. Goliath were a waiting in the compound of the orphanage to adopt me.
00:18:11
Speaker
Isn't that amazing? Wow. Wow. And that conveys who adoption is, right? It's not about us, the appearance.
00:18:22
Speaker
It's about what we can see with our spiritual eyes to a need and to know that I may not have all the ability because my parents have said over the years, um we realized we didn't have all the capability of loving you where you needed to be loved.
00:18:40
Speaker
But we obeyed the Lord and we just did what he asked us to do.
00:18:46
Speaker
Wow. ah I've heard your story before, but every time I'm just right there, i am so amazed once again at just the details of our of our God. And so let's fast forward.
00:19:04
Speaker
When we tell our adoption stories, okay, we have... you know, these beautiful couples who are willing to open their hearts and homes to us, bring us in as their own, just like God does for us as his daughters.
00:19:20
Speaker
But, you know, everybody can say, okay, and they all lived a happily, you know, happy life forever on. and you know, you and i know that's not true.
00:19:30
Speaker
Life just begins. And Even though we have a roof over our head, loving parents, all the food we could want, ever all of our needs are being met.
00:19:41
Speaker
It's just not that picture perfect. And so... What would be, you know, i mean i know there's many probably, but what if you could talk about a challenge and especially our podcast is very focused on our identity and worth in Christ. What would be an area of challenge that you could say as an adopted child that you struggled with?
00:20:11
Speaker
um Once you got into their home and family.
Identity Struggles in Adoption
00:20:15
Speaker
I think for all adopted children and, you know, international adoptee stories are a little different because we look so different. Right. So but definitely domestic adopted, you know, children have the same issue. We start our story begins with abandonment.
00:20:33
Speaker
We were not were rejected. We were rejected. And it takes us years to really sit in our parents, our biological parents' story, and to be able to empathize with their story.
00:20:47
Speaker
But for us as ah as adoptees, we can only identify with our story. You know, we started off as rejects, right? I mean, we just have to be honest.
00:20:57
Speaker
And so when we sit in that, that trauma is there no matter what our circumstances are. Like you, my parents were incredible um parents. They loved me as best as they knew how. I had a great nucleus of family members and in a community that loved me, but I was always, always felt like I was different.
00:21:21
Speaker
And being Asian in a white community, of course, that's exactly, you know, you stand out whether it's positive or negative, and we try to make something positive out of us and try to create a positive story because, you know, it wasn't like I was rejected by society in the white community. Actually, i was sort thought of as um something novel, someone that was different, someone that was exotic. You know, they almost admired me, but I heard that story, but then I looked at myself in the mirror and the original story always was reflected back to me.
00:22:02
Speaker
Nobody wanted you. You're a reject. You're abandoned. you'll You'll never fit in. i think for international adoptees, we try so hard to fit in.
00:22:14
Speaker
And no matter what we just don't fit in. And so during my teenage years, I had this turbulent life where I almost felt like I lived a double life because in public, I did well in school. I had great friends. I was accepted well. People told me how lovely I was.
00:22:36
Speaker
I heard that, but behind closed doors, I felt this disdain for myself. And I took it out on the people that I loved the most, which were my parents.
00:22:48
Speaker
Which, you know, it's like I was not kind to them. And I was not rebellious to the point of, you know, I went and tried all kinds of things, but I was rebellious with my emotions.
00:23:04
Speaker
And And, you know, when you go through healing and psychology, you realize that you're most ugly sometimes with the people that love you the most. And I sort of want to say that to adopted parents.
00:23:18
Speaker
When you see your child acting a certain way with you, that they don't actually act that way with other people, it's because they feel safe with you.
00:23:29
Speaker
And I know that's a really hard place to sit because you want them to love you and to cuddle you and to tell you you're wonderful. But more than likely, it's sort of the opposite.
00:23:40
Speaker
But that's okay. You're their safety. You're their place where they can show the ugly. And it's not about you as a parent. It's about them walking through their healing.
00:23:55
Speaker
Exactly. So what I'm hearing is that you, I feel like I'm looking in a mirror. um You, much like myself, we really struggled with our identity because of our roots of being abandoned and rejected and just, you know, going into a society and a family and and just never feeling like we fit in. And so we really struggle with our identity, but we're both here sitting here today You wrote a book um that has sold over 100,000 copies because it has such a deep message that we want to share. And i co-authored a children's book about our identity and worth as well. um You're hitting the adult the adults. I am going from the children's standpoint, but I know our message
00:24:52
Speaker
It's very united. We have a heartbeat to share about our identity. And so for those who are listening, let's again fast
Spiritual Journey and Understanding God's Love
00:25:01
Speaker
forward. And I hate fast forwarding because there's so much good in your story. That's why i really encourage you to go and find your book because it tells the whole story from front to back. um I want to encourage everybody to go get your book and look you up on your website and learn more about your story because you have a very important message. So let's fast forward to when the Lord, um well, the Lord was always with us from the beginning days on, but how you began to understand the Father's love.
00:25:37
Speaker
Well, for me, you know, I grew up in a Christian home. My parents were pastors and missionaries. So literally, I lived church. You know, I went to church, it seemed like four days a week and memorized the Bible. And I remember even as a 10 year old telling my dad, I wanted to be water baptized. And could he take me clear to the bottom? Because when I came up, I really wanted to feel different. So In my conscious mind, I thought i was a Christian from the time I came into their home. But the word of God says that darkness and light cannot dwell in the same place.
00:26:15
Speaker
And I had a lot of darkness. I had a lot of bitterness. I had a lot of anger. And for me, during my teenage years, I looked at all that as someone else's fault. It wasn't my fault.
00:26:27
Speaker
it was It was the Koreans' fault. It was because I was rejected. It was in the all the things that we want to blame on. But the more blame that you put towards others, the more blame you carry.
00:26:39
Speaker
And so I said earlier that I felt like I lived a double life. What people saw was not who I was. And that even makes you more miserable.
00:26:51
Speaker
And so I remember as a junior in high school, pretty much... Deciding, I can't do this anymore. I just can't pretend that I'm happy and I can't pretend that I have a future.
00:27:06
Speaker
I'm just going to take my own life. So I had a spirit of suicide that rested on me, probably from the time I was like 14, 15, 16, and 17. So I remember one evening writing a letter to my dad.
00:27:21
Speaker
And I knew my dad got up early in the morning and went into a study and always opened up his Bible. So I took that letter and I put it in his Bible. I went back to my bedroom and I had a plan of how I was going to take my life.
00:27:36
Speaker
But I remember sitting on the edge of the bed and then dropping to my knees by the side of my bed. And I didn't say a sweet sinner's prayer. I didn't ask for mercy. I just sort of shook my fist at him because I was really angry at God.
00:27:51
Speaker
Because what all the church taught and what I was feeling seemed to collide, you know, just bang against each other. and And I said, God, I'm so angry at you. If you're what mom and dad say you are and what you've they've taught me all these years, you better do something right now. Because if you don't, I don't know where I'm going to end up because I know I'll probably go to hell. But I'm just telling you, you got to do something right. now And how I describe it is really from the time I was a young girl on the street, I don't know how long I lived on the streets, but one day I remember thinking, if I cry, people abuse me more.
00:28:33
Speaker
When they see my weakness, I get more abuse. So I stopped crying. I never really begged for mercy anymore after that. I got angry and defiant, but never showed my weak side. So that was almost a pride that I carry, you know, that I'm a strong person. I can overcome anything if I really try hard. But I knew how weak I was.
00:28:56
Speaker
And when I said that for the first time in maybe eight, nine years, I began to cry. Tears began to come out of my eyes. And at first that made me angry.
00:29:09
Speaker
you know, why? Why am I doing this when I'm now ready to take charge of my life? And I began to cry and cry. And I guess it just turned into this loud wail. And my parents heard me.
00:29:22
Speaker
And at that time, they had also adopted another little girl. And she's eight years younger than I am. All three of them came running into the room. And I remember I allowed my dad to really hug me for the first time.
00:29:36
Speaker
Touch was not something that I enjoyed very much. And he hugged me and held me tight. And my mom was at the bottom of my feet, rubbing my feet and my legs. And she was just praying, you know, to herself. And and ah I looked at my dad and I said, i don't know what's happening, Dad. You got to help me.
00:29:57
Speaker
And he said, sweetie, Jesus is touching Can you believe that it's Jesus touching you? And he's breaking down the first layer of law that you've held up for years and years.
00:30:11
Speaker
Can you trust him? Can you surrender? And that was the first act of obedience I did is I surrendered. I gave up my right to say, okay, what are you going to do with this? Because I can't do anything.
00:30:30
Speaker
You just got to do it. And that's been what, over 50 years now? And I've said that to the Lord many times. I can't do this anymore. You got to do it.
00:30:41
Speaker
I'm just going to sit in my story and you got to give me the answers because I believe a lie and that lie has just engrafted into my spirit. And it's your spirit that has to take my spirit and cause my spirit to surrender to your spirit. So that's pretty much how I began my walk with Jesus.
00:31:03
Speaker
Wow. um I know we could sit here and talk for another 30 minutes on the same podcast and keep going, but I would like to wrap things up, Stephanie.
00:31:16
Speaker
And if there's an adult adoptee that's listening to us right now today and is really in that crisis moment, like you were just talking about when you cried out and you weren't even really truly understanding until your parents came running in and just began explaining and talking to you about the Lord. if there's ah If there's an adult adoptee listening right now that's in that crisis moment, what would you what would you say to that person?
Advice for Adoptees in Crisis
00:31:48
Speaker
Well, definitely, i would hope that even when they're in crisis, they have an understanding of the love of Jesus, and because that's the first place that we have to sit, right? Yeah.
00:32:01
Speaker
I don't love myself. no one i don't feel like really anyone understands me or knows me, but I by faith have to trust that Jesus loves me.
00:32:12
Speaker
And that even though my story is not the story that I would want for my life, I know it's a story that was written in heaven, all the good, the ugly, the bad, the miracles,
00:32:27
Speaker
Because everyone, if we sit in our story, I think one of the things that I have really encouraged Christians not to do is we want to rush through our healing.
00:32:39
Speaker
her We admit our pain and then we're looking for all the scriptures that tells us that this is where we should be. And we know that healing doesn't happen that way.
00:32:52
Speaker
Healing pretty much for me sat with my story. I'm going to sit in my story. I'm going to sit in the ugly, the raw, the lies, the demonic forces that's in it. Because when you read throughout the story, people sat in their ashes.
00:33:10
Speaker
And actually their friends even came and sat with them. And that's the healing is that we all need someone that believes in our story, that believes in our pain, that is willing to sit in the ash with us, but have the ability to help us to move forward, not from Point A to point Z. And I think that's what Christianity tries to do sometimes. It's like, okay, you have this story, but let tell you. through it.
00:33:40
Speaker
Right. Let me tell you the Z in it. Well, there's all the different places before we get to the Z. So if you're in that place ah where you just feel like you're in the A's and B's of your journey, don't feel ashamed that you're sitting in it.
00:33:56
Speaker
Don't feel condemned that you're sitting in it. Don't feel like you are doing something wrong. But be open to the voice from heaven.
00:34:08
Speaker
Yes. That is willing to speak to you. Don't be close to that voice. Be what I said, surrender to say, okay, God, I don't know how to do this, but I trust you.
00:34:22
Speaker
I surrender my story to you. What's the next step you want me to take?
00:34:30
Speaker
And he'll tell you the next step. And when you take that step, sit in that step for a while. I believe in every step we need to sit in it for a while. Allow the Holy Spirit to speak to us. Allow the word of God to minister to us.
00:34:47
Speaker
And to really see the word of God the way he wants us to see it. Not even, sir I always say, it's not even the way the church taught you. It's the way the Holy Spirit speaks to you. And when he does, you'll know the truth and the truth will set you free for that stage.
00:35:09
Speaker
Then you go to the next stage and the Holy Spirit will set you free for that stage. And then one day, like me, I'm in my 70s now, I can look in the mirror and say, I truly am.
00:35:23
Speaker
a daughter of the king of king I truly am what he said I am, not what my story has told me I am. And you know it.
00:35:35
Speaker
I always say you know it in your knower, you know, and no one can take that from you. No one.
00:35:42
Speaker
That's right. I love it. um Again, i just, when i I hear you talking, um I'm just so um inspired because it was through that um radio podcast, I'm focused on the family that by hearing your story and just what you're talking about now is what breathed life into me. And I know that's part of my story now of why I'm sitting here and getting to share with you about our stories and sitting in that pain and that grief as the Holy Spirit begins to bring a layer of healing that only he can do.
Conclusion and Future Conversations
00:36:25
Speaker
And so I'm just so thankful for our time. i know we have a lot more to talk about. So I just want to invite the listeners and anybody who's viewing this to join us again. for another episode of Pause and Think, because we're going to have Stephanie Fast back on and continue talking about some more things. And i want, again, to let our viewers know to look up her book, She Is Mine. It's an amazing read about your story of adoption, but ultimately your adoption in Christ. And i also want um to let the people know, Stephanie, if you would tell them your um website.
00:37:09
Speaker
<unk> It's stephaniefast.org. Is there another thing that I need to tell you? Yeah, stephaniefast.org. That's all they need to know.
00:37:22
Speaker
Okay, well, look up stephaniefast.org and join us again for another episode of Pause and Think. Thank you. Thanks for joining us for this episode of Pause and Think.
00:37:35
Speaker
For more resources and information, go to whosami.org.