Introduction to 'On Second Watch'
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Speaker
And now your feature presentation.
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Speaker
In the world of big budget blockbusters, travel back in time to explore the epic and not so epic movies of yesteryear. This is On Second Watch, a movie nostalgia podcast.
Meet the Hosts and Mad Libs Game
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Speaker
Welcome to On Second Watch, where we first review movies based on our nostalgia for them, then rewatch them and see if they hold up. And this is one of those, definitely, from our childhood that we'll put to the test to see if it holds up. We also play some plot summary Mad Libs, which just makes things nuts and awful and horrible.
00:00:58
Speaker
but it's fun and trivia to determine who gets to pick our next category for Spin the Wheel. And my name is Tim, your captain of this jolly podcast and the Lost Boy who'd have no problem imagining a grandiose smorgasbord worth $50,000, Chris. That's a good one. I would. I would very much like a smorgasbord.
00:01:24
Speaker
I'm terrified. And we also have the pirate whose boo box would be trapped in a box with portraits of Ryan Gosling dropped one by one, Dana. Amazing. Yep. Boo. So much hate. So much. Our drunken pirates are not here. Carrie and Nikki, they're off doing bigger and better things. Carrie might join us later. Who knows at this point? And our very own toodles who lost his marbles many years ago. What's up, Dan?
00:01:55
Speaker
Instead of marbles, it's just beer bottle caps. How are you doing? Just a little baggy, just takes it everywhere he goes. That's right, man. A baggy of goodies.
Exploring the Movie 'Hook'
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Speaker
We're talking pirates, we're talking smorgasbord and boobox and drunken pirates and toodles. So of course, we're talking about 1991's American adventure film, Hook. And this is based on, guys, all right.
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Speaker
I'm giving you, again, for like the 15th time in a row, all the answers to half the trivia right now. So pay attention. So you're forcing me to pay attention to what you're saying, okay. That's right. 1991's American Adventure Film Hook, based on the novel Peter and Wendy by J.M. Berry with a screenplay by Jim V. Hart and directed by the great Steven Spielberg.
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Speaker
This is starring a powerhouse cast. The great Robin Williams is Peter Pan. Dustin Hoffman is Captain Hook. Julia Roberts as Tinkerbell. Super Mario himself, Bob Hoskins.
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Speaker
That poor man. And I don't care what you say, his version of Super Mario is going to be better than Chris Pratt's version of Super Mario. Oh, hands down. Always. Maggie Smith as Granny Wendy and 100 other cameos in this movie. And did I miss anybody else? Nope. I was just going to double down on the fact that David Crosby as Twinkles. Yes. Yes. David Crosby from Crosby, Stills, and Nash as Twinkles, the pirate. That was awesome.
00:03:31
Speaker
You just never know who you're going to run across. But you are right. There's like a hundred. There's so many people in this movie. Cameos in here. It's more than I, more than I have ever remembered, nor did I see. I just obviously noticed Crosby's magnificent mustache. I know who that is. The only one I really knew was Glenn Close and I'm just still watching her.
00:03:59
Speaker
As this pirate, I'm just like, I still can't see it at all. I missed it. That's how ignorant I was to that being her. I'm pretty sure I know who she was looking. Yeah, I went in a boo box. That's what I thought. I was like, when I was watching, I was like, there's something specific about this pirate. I was like, it's like, it looks like eight pounds of makeup. I was like, what's going on here? I was like, this is a very effeminate pirate. And I was like, well, it's pleasant. She's a woman.
00:04:28
Speaker
It's the reversed outfire. I just love the story that she was just hanging out with Robin Williams one day on the set and they're like, Hey, you want to be a pirate? Okay. There it is for Carrie Fisher. Um, who else? Oh, we'll get to those for sure. I'm sure Tim's got a list. There's a bunch of Star Wars shit in this. Oh yeah. That's right.
00:04:56
Speaker
With a budget of 70 million, it made 300 million in the box office, was still considered a failure, and currently sits at a 6.1 on IMDb. And this movie was not chosen by A Spin the Wheel. This was rather a special request from a huge movie buff and fan of our podcast.
Listener Request for 'Hook' Review
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Speaker
Can you believe it? We have a fan.
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Speaker
Her name is Nicole Marie and she reached out to me on Instagram. Geez, October of last year, I think it was, and gave me a huge list of movies that she wanted us to review with Hook being one of them. And because this one just hit me just straight in the nostalgia, I said, okay, we will absolutely do this.
00:05:36
Speaker
And after almost a year, Nicole, this one is for you. So thank you for listening and happy, very late birthday. I told you I was going to do this for your birthday and I didn't, which is just par for the course of the show. But thanks for listening and requesting this movie to him. We lose her. We have fans. Yeah, I know. At least one. At least one. I feel bad for her ears.
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Speaker
Yeah, every time you talk. I know I make people stommer and dumber every time I say something. Sorry, Nicole. I know this. We've known you since fourth and sixth grade. Trust us, we know you. You guys are still smart. It takes a lot to make you guys dumb. I'm still working on that, though. Don't worry.
00:06:18
Speaker
It won't happen, but, um, yeah. So like I said, Nicole, this one's for you. I hope we don't just destroy it for you, but if we do, it's the risky take. Now I gotta be nice. No, no, no. I'm kidding. We can, we can definitely go into it, but before we do, it's that magical time everybody.
Movie Trivia Segment Begins
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Speaker
Oh, shit. Dinner time. What? Dinner time. No, that was, that was the last episode. Dinner? Food?
00:06:48
Speaker
It is time. All right, settle down there, you gremlin. Hey, it's not midnight yet. I can eat. It's time for trivia. Oh, I want a pizza again. Let's see, I forgot even how I start the suspense so long. Oh, there it is. There's the button. Everybody ready? I am. I am ready. Sure. All right, let's kick this thing off. Let's start that countdown. Where's that gong?
00:07:17
Speaker
You guys turned your sound off this time, so. Yeah. We got smart. All good. So here we go. Question one. Hook was released in what year? You know what? Did you emphasize the year like you did? 1990, 1991, 1992, or 1993? 1991. How does Tim put it? It's best I'm going to ask that you don't shout out the answers like you did last time.
00:07:48
Speaker
I'm sorry, Dana needs to get at least one right, okay? Helping her out. Hey, I got this right without your help. Just like you know. So everybody guessed 91. Of course, that's correct. Where are we at? Ooh, Spaz in the lead. Just barely. 94 points. Dana right behind, and then Chris. So it's... I literally selected it as soon as it loaded. I love how it sat there for five seconds, sending the answer. You know what, man?
00:08:18
Speaker
It's just the way it is. I know, man. Fuck your trivia. With that, we'll go to question two. Hook is a sequel to what 1911 novel? You didn't say this one, Tim. I did. Oh, yes, he did. Pan After, After Neverland, Peter and Wendy were the adventures of Peter Pan. Let's say the adventures of Pete and Pete. Oh, I almost put that. I almost put that. Finding Neverland. I like that movie, too.
00:08:49
Speaker
And everybody guessed Peter and Wendy, which of course is correct. You guys, I got two right. It's a record. I know. Question three, which actor was not considered for the role of Captain Hook? David Bowie, Tom Hanks, Donald Sutherland, or Christopher Lloyd? I had to throw a curve ball in here at least once, right?
00:09:15
Speaker
We can't hit curveballs. Didn't you see the movie? Trouble with the curve? Oh, that's a total split. Oh, wow. Somebody's going to emerge as the leader in this one. Tom Hanks. Oh, balls. Was not considered for the lead. So Chris came out with that one. So the package was considered for the lead, huh? He was. What's that? The package.
00:09:42
Speaker
David Bowie. Yeah, they probably saw his fantastic performance in Labyrinth, was like, cast this man, and his gigantic bulge. As it gets bigger and bigger throughout the movie. But they already cast, they already cast Hoskins as the right hand man, they couldn't cast his bulge as me, so.
00:10:05
Speaker
supporting actor. All right. Question for who does not have a cameo or minor scene in hook. Holy shit. Phil Collins, Carrie Fisher, Richard Dreyfus, or Gwyneth Peltrow. Oh, I think I fucked this. Yeah. You son of a bitch. Listen, I just write the questions. I don't like you anymore, Tim.
00:10:36
Speaker
Oh, again, we're split. Nobody guessed Carrie Fisher because we did talk about her being in this game. You're welcome, guys. The correct answer, Richard Dreyfuss. What? Damn it. I got it right. You're in a Paltrow. Oh. Gwyneth's Paltrow was very much in it. She plays a young Wendy. She does. That's why I almost answered her. I was like, nope. And as soon as I clicked Phil Collins, I was like, nope.
00:11:00
Speaker
I only remember this because Tim made a big deal about Phil Collins when we were watching this. And I was like, oh. It blew my mind. He was one of the lieutenants, the police officers that came to, you know, assess the crime and just kind of blow it off. Kids are missing, but oh well. That was pretty challenging with Richard Dreyfus because you'd think with their affiliation,
Debate Over Trivia Answers
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Speaker
obviously, with doing Jaws and stuff. That's why I threw that zinger in there. Take your zinger and shove it.
00:11:30
Speaker
All that said, Chris is still in the lead with Dana in second and Spaz. Pulling up the rear. Far behind. It's all right. Anything can happen at question nine. Remember? Yeah, I'll teach you when I blow it. Question five, which Academy Award did Hook win? Best music, original song, best art direction, set direction, best costume design, or none of the above?
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Speaker
And for what it's worth, it was nominated for each one of these. Oh, looks like where two of you said none of the above. One of you answered best art direction, set decoration. And the correct answer is none of the above. Balls. It won absolutely nothing.
00:12:26
Speaker
I don't think I've ever been in the lead in trivia once.
00:12:30
Speaker
in the history of trivia. So, no, no, I don't, I don't know the rest of the answers in the sense of like, I probably will get them all wrong, but I'm just going to take this moment to celebrate and it's over. All right. There we go. We will see what happens next. So question six, what was dropped into the boo box to punish pirate Glen close scorpions, tarantulas, fire ants, or piranhas.
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Speaker
I expect you guys to get this one. That was pretty easy. Dana, don't let me down. Sorry. Oh no. Oh, she let you down. Oh no. Piranhas, piranhas. Dana gets piranhas. They were scorpions. I think I was having a really hard time getting over her facial hair.
00:13:27
Speaker
I was like, I don't know about this. It was weird, but Dana blew that one. So Chris again is in the lead by 80 points. That's why I took my moment to celebrate for two seconds. It doesn't matter because of the last question. So I don't know. If he keeps failing this, you could guess zero points and still beat them. So we're getting closer to that point. Shut up.
00:13:56
Speaker
Question seven, which of the following is a quote from Smee? I've just had a sublime vision. Hello, having trouble with the missus. The truth is far too much fun or lightning has just struck my brain. Son of a bitch. I think, yeah, fuck. I got this from him. I love how every question I get spazzes commentary. Oh, God damn it. Son of a bitch. Every time.
00:14:25
Speaker
So we have, I just had a supply and vision, and two of you guessed the truth is far too much fun. But guys, those were both from Hook. Which of the following was it? Oh, from Smee. Why did I, nice, I've still hung up on that nap from Smee. Oh, sorry. Oh, it is Smee. Sorry. Yeah, my bad. Lightning has just struck my brain.
00:14:47
Speaker
Cause yeah, I remember him saying that, but I don't know. That's why he's, I said, Oh shit. I deliberately grabbed the truth one cause I was like, Oh yeah, that's hook. That's me. Nice. Sorry. Anyway, that was a net loss in that question. It was already jumping to question eight. What was Peter's happy thought? Meeting his wife, becoming a father, defeating captain hook or visiting Wendy.
00:15:21
Speaker
All right. That's every man's happy thought. Mine's food. Everybody said becoming a father and of course that is the correct answer. So Chris still in the lead. Dana is a hundred points behind. So it's gonna get a little tight here. Question nine. This is it. The final question. So you have to wager your points. So place your bets now.
00:15:49
Speaker
Ooh, locking lips, what a hint. It all comes down to this. Oh no, you did not. How many different people does Robin Williams kiss in this movie? Two, three, four, or five. There it is.
00:16:18
Speaker
Let's see, we have... Two of you said three. One of you said four. But guys... It's two. The correct answer was five. Five. He kissed the three mermaids.
00:16:34
Speaker
Ah, that wasn't a kiss. That was a kiss. Are you kidding me? You son of a bitch. That was a kid. It's a repeat of the matrix all over again. You are such a liar, Tim. They were not kissing. They were giving him air so he could breathe underwater. Spielberg said it was a kiss. So Spielberg, I can't. He's stupid. Breathing into his fucking lungs.
00:17:02
Speaker
Here we go again. Now I'm fucking pissed off now. God damn it, Tim. Anyway, this happened. Dana one. What? Call it a technicality all you want, but they know what I'm calling a technicality. But you know what? You know what, though? I think you guys are going to like my category for for this. So don't worry. I will always bet all every time. So same here. Absolutely.
00:17:29
Speaker
And that may have been the one reason I didn't do it is because everybody's been doing that. Yeah, because I thought I had it in the bag when I was like, oh, locking lips, he's going to make a question about like the thimble or some shit. Nope. He's going to make some awkward question about when he got mouth to mouth air. Yes, not kissing. And then kissed a couple of other people.
00:17:53
Speaker
It was a kiss. Spooker said it was a kiss. They would not kiss. You know what? I'm closing the tab. I'm done. Thanks everybody for listening. I'm going to chalk this up to another Matrix fiasco. Whatever. You know what?
00:18:16
Speaker
Can't trust nobody nowadays. No, you can't man. He's trying to give his wife the victory. That's what it was. This is why we can't have nice things. You know what? I only didn't. That only happened because Kerry wasn't here. Yeah. I remember everything. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Look at me. I'm smarter than everybody. It's like a fucking elephant.
00:18:38
Speaker
I don't know how that correlates to Carrie at all, but she remembers everything. They have great memories. Uh, you know what? I missed that national geographic episode. So the more, you know, if she joins, I will ask her. What about the elephants or, or the, no, just maybe I'll just run the trivia for her. Okay. All right. That's that. Let's move on to something else. I can't, my night is ruined. No fix it. We will fix it.
00:19:08
Speaker
All right. I bought a pizza over here too.
Mad Libs Game with Fan Suggestions
00:19:10
Speaker
Oh no, I'm sorry. That's the worst. Okay. That would ruin my night. I made a homemade pizza. Then I ate it. I was about to ask, did you make it yourself? I do. Yes. I make the dough myself too. Nice. Alrighty. So with Platt summary, Mad Libs, I reached out to some fans of the show for them to give their words and they're just nuts. So
00:19:35
Speaker
We have some of the nouns, adjectives, and verbs already provided so that's less work for you guys. Sweet. So our friends Rico and the man gave us the nouns, armpit, dogapoo, and clown spanker. Way to go. They gave the verbs puff, moan, and twitch, and the adjectives sweaty, arrogant, and delectable.
00:20:03
Speaker
Oh wow. Terrific. Uh, the awesome ladies at 10 K dollar day, uh, gave the words unctuous, which is like oily breathless and drip. Oh wow. There's a theme there. There absolutely is. So, and I am here for it. Way to go.
00:20:30
Speaker
So those words have been added, so we will... Those are some good words, man. It is. We'll fill in the blanks from there. But first, I gotta have an order that we are in for this lovely mad lips. Are we using everybody or just the four of us?
00:20:46
Speaker
Oh, it's everybody. No one is allowed to get out of this one. Terrific. So let's see. I'm choosing Chris first because he's being very grumpy. I'm not grumpy. You're always grumpy. Yeah, not wrong. I'm just talking about a technicality. You're right.
00:21:15
Speaker
It wasn't a kiss. Whatever. Spaz and I will die on this hill. Probably. Because we're right and he's wrong. I'm going to sit here on my hill with my lawn chair and wait for myself to die. Yeah. I mean, there's a clear difference where you can actually hear the breathing and not kissing. You know what? We were going to let it go. We were going to let it go until you said I was grumpy. And look what you did. Look what you did. Look what you did. Jerk.
00:21:47
Speaker
All right, Dana and Spaz pick a number one through four. Three. One. That settles that. I need three nouns. Whispery lips. Yes. I appreciate you snapping your fingers after you said that too.
00:22:06
Speaker
All right, I'm gonna go with this. Vimble. Vimble. There it is. I don't remember when the wispery lived. I don't even think we were recording yet, but that's, uh, for those that don't know, that's what Chris referred to Spaz's mustache. It wasn't, it wasn't wispy. It was a wispy lips. Oh, wispy lips. Sorry.
00:22:25
Speaker
If you want to take yourself to the next level with your whispering lips, that's a whole other can of water. That's my own little space right there. Yeah, you know what? I don't need to know what your dating app handle is, OK? I don't have a dating app. I'm not you. Oh, yeah. That was a whispery lips, because that's just weird. Yeah, it is. And I'm going to start calling them that in public. Dude, I already told you to do it. I'm OK with this.
00:22:51
Speaker
I have. I need one more noun. Chris, you didn't give one. So I think it's you. Okay. Um, pencil, uh, two adjectives, juicy, corpulent. Wow. These are some crazy adjectives on here today. Yes. Yes. All right. That leaves me with four verbs. Cook, shiver, meat timber, trotting, flat, ing, ing. Yeah.
00:23:22
Speaker
You can go either way. I just think flapping is funnier. Flapping is sweet. Go away, bite. Oh, God. I need one more. Did you get my trotting? Yeah. Oh, I didn't hear that one. Yeah. Oh, yeah. There's some trotting involved. Got a trot. All right. Time for our miscellaneous words. I need a profession.
00:23:51
Speaker
Basket Weaver. Dream Weaver. Dream Weaver. I don't have the pipes, apparently, Spaz does, though. Those whispery lips. It must be those whispery lips. All right, speaking of Spaz, what is something Spaz would do at work? Not. Okay, I'm gonna say this. Break a leg.
00:24:22
Speaker
And I've come close. I know. I've almost toured by Achilles. So let's do that. Savage. All right. I need a famous actress. Charlize Theron. Oh, God damn it. So hot. I was very close to picking like someone from an adjacent
00:24:44
Speaker
field of film, but I did. Adjacent. Adjacent. It was parallel to major film. Well, here's your chance. I need another famous actress. All right, Chris. Well, I can't do it on the spot now. I'm not picking a porn actress. I'm not doing it. Someone else go. Jenna Jameson there. That's one's boring. All right. Do better. Jessa Rhodes.
00:25:14
Speaker
Okay. I like how Tim and Dana are just like, huh? Yeah. What is that? I'm like, don't worry about it. Names. I'm not going to Google later. Do your thing. Remy LaCroix. All right. Moving on. Uh, I need an event that Dana would win a trophy in.
00:25:43
Speaker
Oh no. Fisticuffs. I was gonna say hatchet through. I just want to see Dana throw down and beat the shit out of somebody. I've seen it. She pummels Tim on a daily basis. Straight up knuckle brawl. Like just like going ham on somebody. It's like, here comes Dana, like five foot five, like super nice and wavy bell dings. And look at that. Someone's getting their ass whooped. Just goes feral.
00:26:11
Speaker
I can be awfully terrifying sometimes. Yes. All right. Uh, I need two body parts. Earlobe. Nose. That's quite spot on. One could say it's on the nose. Get the fuck out of here.
00:26:31
Speaker
Yeah, I got, I got Googling to do. Hurry up. Let's finish this. He's gotta go look at me in the corner. I know. No, I totally don't know who Jess, Jessa Rose is. Oh, she's nice. I need an animal. Anteater. There we go. Antelope. Hardvark. There you go. The proper name. A type of spice. Cumin. Yeah. That's what I was thinking. All right. An adjective used to describe Chris.
00:27:03
Speaker
Giggling doesn't count. It's not an adjective. I want to know what ran you ahead of it. Just keep your sticker to yourself, you little shit. Things that describes Chris. Hilarious there. I'll go. I'll be nice.
00:27:32
Speaker
You are hilarious, though, you funny son of a bitch. Laugh, god damn it. All right, last three. Something good. Sex. Wow. Speaking of on the nose. Something bad. Sex. This is like a catch-all, apparently.
00:28:03
Speaker
What's that saying? Even bad sex? Brussels sprouts there. Dude, I like Brussels sprouts. Those look delicious. No, they're good. No, they're good. You've had really shitty Brussels sprouts then. All of them, yes. No, man. Brussels sprouts are shit. Lima beans, shit. Whoa, take it back. I will not. Green beans, shit. Lima beans are like little potatoes. You're a little turd.
00:28:30
Speaker
This is why you're bad. Hey, for anyone listening, this is what happens when you don't eat your vegetables. You end up like spaz. Exactly. This is true. Welcome to my world. I refuse to put Brussels sprouts on here as something bad. Right. Because three out of four of us say they're delicious. Yeah, that's exactly. Overtime. Overtime is not bad. Overtime is awesome. You get more money. Unpaid overtime. All right, that works. You can put unpaid overtime.
00:28:59
Speaker
I don't, I get paid over time. At that point, it's just volunteering with extra steps. That's right. All right. And finally, something that I can't live without. I isn't Tim. Dana. Yeah, that's right. That's adorable. I'm going sappy bitches. See, I was going to say Star Wars. I was going to say Star Wars too. John Williams. BB-8. What you going to do, Tim?
00:29:25
Speaker
He's going to pick John Williams. Oh, he's going to totally choose John Williams. John Williams. This man can not live without his John Williams. I don't know. John Williams was my number three man crush. I like how. I like how it's got a number. And it's the third one. I'm now just for my own morbidity. One and two. Rami Lacroix, Jenna Rhodes. Wait, no, shit. Let's see. Number one is always Justin Timberlake.
00:29:54
Speaker
This is before or after the frosted tips? After. Number two's the rock. The rock's just a beast of a man. Yes, he is. A beast.
00:30:14
Speaker
You'd have to watch yourself, man. He's sore after that one. I'm not saying that I want to engage in any relations with these three people. I'm just saying that they are like the pinnacle of a human being. I appreciate you just like the rock. He's a beast of a man. Look at the ass on that. Oh yeah. He must work out. Oh boy.
00:30:41
Speaker
This is, um, this is going to be interesting. It's quite the episode. Yes. All right. Here I present the plot summary, Mad Libs of hook. Chris is a sweaty clown spanker. And hot shot basket Weaver who spends more time breaking a leg than being with his family.
00:31:09
Speaker
Chris took a trip to London with his family, which includes his juicy wife, Charlize Theron. Aw, come on. I can't believe you married her. Son of a bitch.
Nostalgia and Anecdotes on 'Hook'
00:31:19
Speaker
Clownsmaker gets them all. Wait for it. His daughter, the young Jessa Rhodes. Oh, Jesus. Look what you did, Chris. You turned her to porn. What happened, stepdaughter? Oh, God. Oh, I'm so sorry. No. Oh, God.
00:31:37
Speaker
Speaking of, have you seen what the girl that played Maggie looks like now? I did look her up on IMDb because I was curious about the son, which we can talk about later, in his crazy life now. But yeah, the daughter looks quite different. Quite different. And his son, Tim, the breathless, whispery lips, who is still mad at Chris for missing his competition in fisticuffs.
00:32:14
Speaker
While the parents were out with Granny Wendy at a charity dinner honoring her contributions to cooking the children,
00:32:27
Speaker
Tim and Jessa Rose were kidnapped by Captain Spaz, the arrogant armpit pirate who wants his revenge. Who wants his revenge and to drip Chris for cutting off his earlobe and feeding it to the aardvark. Jesus. Wow.
00:32:54
Speaker
Yeah, this is, um, yeah, this is dark. It is captain spaz's loyal nose, Dana, dog poo, who spends most of her time preventing captain spaz from puffing himself.
00:33:17
Speaker
It's Swedish. It's not mine. It's not mine, I swear. Someone else is getting a bulge. No. Oh. Preventing Captain Spaz from puffing himself and moaning the crew into shape. That is, dude, this is seriously taking down a path of the pirate spoof that Jessica wrote.
00:33:46
Speaker
A lot of moaning, a lot of puffing. This is crazy. Anyway, soon after Chris is visited by Tinkercarry.
00:33:56
Speaker
The delectable thimble fairy, who obviously wants to shiver Chris. Wow! Poor Carrie, every time. And tells him that he must return to Neverland and become the Chris from long ago to rescue his children and flap the pirates once and for all. Gotta flap him. Gotta flap him. You gotta flap him.
00:34:22
Speaker
Tinkercarry sprinkles some cumin dust on Chris, and together they fly to Neverland. Chris is twitched by the Hilarious Boys to prepare for a duel with Captain Spaz. Unconvinced is Nikki, the unculous pencil and leader of the Hilarious Boys, whose personal mission is to trot Chris. Guys, it's getting weird. It is.
00:34:52
Speaker
In this battle between sex and unpaid overtime, it's up to Chris to save John Williams. The end. Sex and unpaid overtime. Watch those levels balance out. So that was wrong. It was on several levels. Yeah.
00:35:21
Speaker
So thank you Rico and the man in $10k days who are hilarious and awesome. So check them out. If you don't listen to them, you should. So that takes us.
00:35:33
Speaker
through the shenanigans. So let's talk about our nostalgia for this film. So Spaz, I think you were the most recent person to watch this film. Why don't you hit us with your rewatch review of Hook and give us your score out of 10. I have a lot of nostalgia with this movie. I saw it in the theater. I was a huge Robin Williams fan.
00:35:55
Speaker
I mean, I probably have watched all of his movies, if not most of them, and I've watched a lot of his comedy acts and all that stuff. And then you got, I don't know, this movie, the set design, the actors, the way the facial expressions of Dustin Hoffman, the way his mustache twitched when he heard the ticking of the clock. That was fantastic. Bob Hashkins, that's me. God damn, I love this movie.
00:36:21
Speaker
This is probably one of my all time. It was probably definitely a favorite of mine for sure. I'm going to give this nine for me. Well, even even watching it again as an adult. Yes, as an adult. All right. Yes. Because it took me back to some good times as a kid while watching it with, you know, at the
00:36:43
Speaker
family Christmas party and stuff like that. So absolutely. That's one of the first things I said when I was watching this was I just like immediately just took me back to when I was a kid and watching this film all the freaking time. So that's a nine from spaz. Let's go with Chris. Yeah. So hook, you're right. I know that sound. Here comes a five for Chris. Well, like, like I mentioned last time via text, I really didn't have any interest in watching this for this podcast.
00:37:12
Speaker
It's not to say, once I started watching it, you know, it was a lot more enjoyable than I remembered. I am not one of those people that watched it religiously growing up. I can't tell you the last time I've seen this movie. It's gotta be years. And I think I've only seen it collectively maybe two times my entire life. So it was fun. It was, it was fun. I enjoyed it.
00:37:38
Speaker
You know, I still think outside of some of the terrible CGI, it holds up pretty well. How dare you? It's all fantastic. It's pretty bad. Even Spielberg says he hated some of the flying. But I will say, you know, after watching it and like thinking about it and stuff, I had fun watching it, but I mean, it's not without its complaints from me at least. The runtime being two hours and 20 minutes? Yeah, no.
00:38:05
Speaker
Yeah, you could shave off easily 30 minutes and this would still be a fantastic movie, you know, and it definitely went up and down. There's parts where I was really engaged, there's parts where I was kind of like bored, for lack of a better term. But you know, some parts it was it was endearing. That's the word I was thinking of, like with some of the kids. Like every time I do see this movie, one of my favorite actors in this movie is Thudbutt.
00:38:30
Speaker
but yes like just the actor he just you know the little interaction Robin Williams has with him and stuff is just it's endearing you know i thought it was um it was nice so anyways long story made longer um you know it was it was an okay time am i gonna go by you know the ultimate collector's edition and watch it you know
00:38:56
Speaker
every year, probably not, but I'm going to give it a solid seven. Wow. Higher than I thought. Looky, looky. I got a hooky. Well, one, I love Dustin Hoffman's... Portrayal? Yeah, acting in this.
00:39:13
Speaker
And I love all the cameos, you know, Bob Hoskins, I mean, Robin Williams. I do think some of the kids were pretty good. Like I said, I think Thudbutt, like his role and stuff, you know, it was endearing, you know, it's deliberately there to pull on your heartstrings, you know, the two that I have, but, you know, and it did and stuff. So like I said, you know, all in all, I enjoyed it. It's a good family movie and stuff, you know, so I just, I'm not in love with it.
00:39:42
Speaker
kind of you know good movie though just a little long a lot long you could probably get an hour off yeah that would mean that's kind of where I was hinting at but I was like I don't know where they could trim the fat if you will on this there's just like certain points where I just like it seems wholly unnecessary like the whole subplot with Tinkerbell like it's like you look back at it it brings nothing to the movie no just sadness
00:40:04
Speaker
outside of like, Oh, now Julia Roberts is big. I mean, and I'm not complaining that you get to see Julia Roberts on the screen. I'm just saying, really a 22 year old Julia Roberts. Yeah. This was right after, uh, or right around this time. And she did pretty woman, isn't it? Yes, it was. Okay. Easy there, tiger. Fire today. I'm just saying spaz is busy over there. Googling.
00:40:29
Speaker
Straight Googling. Googling and Googling. Do it when I do best, man. This is a Christian podcast. The hell it is. We passed that on the first one. We threw that out the door real quick. All right, Dana, let's see what you got to say about Hook.
00:40:53
Speaker
Unlike everybody else, I did not see this movie until maybe 10 years ago. I don't know, but I actually did see this movie. So do I get points for that? I do. That's like an extra 50 points to wherever they get allocated. 50 points extra. Probably the Gryffindor. She's more of a buff. I was going to say another thing I really haven't seen, but anyways, I mean, this movie was, um, it was really long. Yeah.
00:41:21
Speaker
It's really, really long. But my observation isn't gonna be one that anybody else is probably really thinking about. So normally, when I watch a movie that's older, I notice how young people are. Because usually, you see the younger version of everybody.
00:41:39
Speaker
But I swear to God, everybody in this film looked really old. Yeah, OK. Thank you. Dust it off. Maggie Smith. Oh, God. Yes. Maggie Smith has looked the same way for three years. Yes. Yes. But I mean, everybody looked old. Even the people who were young and we've seen them in other things, they looked old. Yeah. Like, I don't understand it. It's it's yeah, it's it's you know what?
00:42:07
Speaker
You bringing in that to light, yes. I thought Maggie Smith for sure, and I thought it was deliberately that they aged her for her role. Oh yeah. Yeah. But- She was 56 when they filmed this, so they did. Yeah, and I knew they did. It's just funny because it's very spot on how she looks in Harry Potter. No offense to Maggie Smith. I love Maggie Smith, but it was just like-
00:42:29
Speaker
credit goes to the makeup department for Hook in that regard because it was very natural looking. But Dana's right though. Everyone just, it has this like aura of old. It does. It was crazy. Cause like, even if, I mean, seriously, even if you looked at some of the kids,
00:42:48
Speaker
they didn't look young in some ways. And it wasn't because it was like older actors or anything that had nothing to do with it. It was just a very interesting thing. Cause like to me, Julia Roberts looked old. I felt like Robin Williams looked really old in this too. And I don't know if I was just, that was all I could see after a while was, oh my God, everybody's old. But I spent a lot of the movie focusing on this. And it was a very interesting,
00:43:17
Speaker
observation. And I'm like, was it on purpose? Was everybody like that on purpose? I don't know. But I mean, we did comment that we were laughing that, you know, we were making fun of Back to the Future's prosthetics for old people. And six years later, it looks so realistic on Maggie Smith. I literally have thought since I was a kid that Maggie Smith has been 90 years old for 30 years.
00:43:41
Speaker
The reason that Maggie Smith's character didn't bother me as much, because unlike in Back to the Future, she had the full costume that says, I'm supposed to be old. I mean, they even made sure to cover her hands. They had her in just something that a very rich old person would wear, but whatever.
00:44:01
Speaker
everything but her face screamed I'm gonna be old so whatever they did with her face it just it played the part whereas in Back to the Future whatever suit he was wearing and then the prosthetics it just didn't match you can see the prosthetics on his face exactly it just it didn't go whereas like with with Maggie Smith's character I mean wow did they do that really well
Maggie Smith's Timeless Appearance
00:44:24
Speaker
But I don't know, her being old was just, I mean, I guess we've all already known her that way for most of her roles. So it's like, I should be careful with saying that. But I mean, like, everybody else too, they all looked old. So that really bothered me. I don't know. I'm used to looking at old movies and saying, oh, wow, that person was so young there. I did not say that once.
00:44:46
Speaker
But I mean, overall, it was good. It just seriously too long, though. I swear an hour and a half would have been enough. Yeah, absolutely. It would have been enough. But I mean, I also don't remember it being that long the first time I saw it, though. But I don't know. I'll give it a seven out of 10. It's a lot better than I thought it was going to be after looking at you watch this film. I couldn't get over how old everybody was. I'm sorry. You get on these details. You're like, I'm out.
00:45:18
Speaker
I am glad though, the running trend so far is how crazy long this film is and how it didn't need to be that long whatsoever. No. Um, yeah, I dunno. My other little tidbit of which I really enjoy is Rufio goes on to do a bunch of awesome voice acting. And he is the voice of Prince Zuko from Apatyr, the last airbender. Yep. Which is awesome. Did you guys hear who was supposed to be or penciled in to be Peter Pan?
00:45:47
Speaker
No. No. Good old Michael Jackson.
00:45:52
Speaker
You know, I'm sorry. Yes. I did read about how this, this film was first drafted, what, in 83. I think so. Yeah. Yeah. And it was because Michael Jackson expressed interest in being Peter Pan. So Steven Spielberg had this, but it got backburnted for I believe temple of doom. Um, and then it didn't start pre-production until 89. And from there on, I mean, you know,
00:46:17
Speaker
it just things changed a ton it's well he i i think i read that uh he just didn't like the whole peter pan becomes just this old guy that just forgets his peter pan ways and he just didn't care for that so what did he what did he want and just an older peter pan that just still they cherish neverland but but that totally defeats the whole thing about peter pan peter man doesn't just
00:46:43
Speaker
get older and still be coming okay you know what all right i'm not gonna he thought he was the real peter ken all right i'm not gonna sit here and debate someone's idea they had 30 years ago but peter pan doesn't grow oh that's the whole point unless he leaves never never mind okay you know what i'm done michael jackson was a messed up man dude he was he's just a man in a mirror okay
00:47:09
Speaker
Hehe. All right. So before I share my thoughts up of the film, because I know he's listening to this, I wrote an open letter to Steven Spielberg because I know that he hates this movie.
Letter to Steven Spielberg about 'Hook'
00:47:23
Speaker
He strongly dislikes this movie. He's very upset that he did it. It's one of his regrets. So I decided to write an open letter to Steven. So humor me as I read this, because like I said, I know he's listening. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Yes.
00:47:38
Speaker
So I can look back at what I've done in this podcast. I know there's some great episodes and some I really don't like, but once in a while a listener will contact me that heard one of these bad episodes and comment about something we said or did that made them smile or remember the film in a special way. And I know that you, Steven, that's listening to this, have works that you're truly proud of, some of which are considered on our list of best movies of all time. And I also know you have some movies you're not proud of and don't like, which hook being one of those.
00:48:09
Speaker
But to me, Hook is everything I needed it to be as a young child who never wanted to grow up himself. I had a fear of losing my imagination and with it my creativity. I saw Peter Banning as a father who was controlled by his job and his relationship with his family greatly suffered and I wanted no part of that when I grew up.
00:48:28
Speaker
Now a lot of millennials and Gen Xers experienced a world of overworked parents and were latchkey kids figuring things out on their own, and they were the perfect audience for this film. At the age I was when I first saw this film, I was hooked and yes pun intended.
00:48:43
Speaker
You have the Lost Boys, a group of kids in charge of their own destiny, fighting against the pirates, fighting against grown-ups, fighting against growing up themselves. I have a magical world of Neverland, food fights and human-sized slingshots, humor, and plenty of drama. And no, as a kid I didn't care about all the drama in the background of Peter when he was a kid, but I did love to see a dad fight his own fears to do everything he could to save his family. Plus, this music is near perfection.
00:49:09
Speaker
So now I, as a dad, who is clinging on to every ounce of imagination and creativity I have left, hope that my kids will look at me and see Peter Pan and not a smelly old pirate. So bangerang Steven. So had to say that the audience, I think as a kid, seeing this in the nineties, especially the Gen Xers and the upcoming millennials. I think this is just a great film to see. I don't care what the adults had to say. It's just a looking into a mirror to some of them.
00:49:39
Speaker
Didn't he walk it back a little bit? I'm not saying that he totally renounced that he said he didn't like this movie, but didn't he say after Robin Williams' passing that looking back, even though he is not thrilled with the movie, he is still happy he filmed it because that's how he first met Robin Williams.
00:50:01
Speaker
It could be. I remember reading that at least. I did remember reading also that he really, really did not like how this movie turned out though. He said he had a very hard time wrangling the kids to behave. I'm sure of it. That was one of the reasons. The article said they were unruly.
00:50:22
Speaker
Of course. I mean, there's like 30 kids on set with all these toys and shit. And then like, I'm not, I've never done a lot of film, but it's a lot of hurry up and wait from my understanding. You do your part, wait around, do your part again, et cetera. So I could see the kids getting bored. That fun house, that awesome freaking tree for it. How could you not have fun in that thing?
00:50:49
Speaker
Right. But yeah, I don't know. I mean, I do remember him reading what you said, but I also remember that he did. He didn't walk it back completely, but he did say he was grateful to give the opportunity to do it because that's how he got to meet Robin Williams, at least. Yeah, absolutely. But he still, I think, hates this movie. I'm glad he did it because I love this movie.
00:51:11
Speaker
And clearly, I haven't grown up, so. I find it surprising, though, that he dislikes it so much. It's not a bad movie. It's a very, like I said, it's an endearing family movie. It's very paint by numbers, though, as far as plot goes. Hook takes kids, blah, da, da, da. And there's no surprises. But it's not like, I don't know. I've seen some of Steven Spielberg's movies where I'm just like, yeah, no. Looking at you, artificial intelligence. Oh, yeah.
00:51:41
Speaker
There's some really weird ones. This isn't one of those on my list, at least. No. I mean, that's why I'm very surprised that this is the one he doesn't like. I mean, we all have some less than stellar projects we've worked on. Yeah. So here are some things that I observed while watching this. Uh, first of all, how savage is Peter for leaving Wendy after all these years? Only finally when he gets there and she's old, she, he immediately sees her grandchild and was like, yeah, I'm marrying that.
00:52:10
Speaker
Yup. All those years I'm just courting Wendy. It's just like, Ooh, okay. Yeah. It's a little weird when you take it into that context. Cause that's what I was thinking. I was like, Oh yeah. You were totally all about Wendy. And you were like, uh, no, man, your granddaughter. What's up? Yeah. I was like, Oh God. Like really? And he's like, yeah. Um, I'm gonna, I'm gonna stop going back to Neverland and I'm totally sleeping and I'm going to make out with her. And I'm like, this isn't right on several levels.
00:52:40
Speaker
Weird, weird. Anyways. Yeah. Um, seen at the end where Smee's like stealing all the gold and the necklaces and just thinking about himself when he comes running out of that cabin and all the coins just fall off his pockets. The only person I could think of is Dan.
00:53:01
Speaker
There's, um, there were several times in our history going to bowling alleys where Dan goes up to throw a bowling ball and $82 and change comes flying out all over the lanes. I don't understand. You gotta have that change for gumballs, baby.
00:53:17
Speaker
For context like what Tim was saying us we all went to you know, we've known each other the three of us at least in sixth grade Dan loves Cargo pants doesn't matter if they're in or not motherfuckers gonna wear them I enjoy being comfortable. They're comfortable.
00:53:34
Speaker
Okay, you know what we're not gonna get into this now in the podcast Okay, but anyways like Tim was saying Dan carried roughly $82 in quarters every time we're with him go house You know how every every Wild West movie
Bowling Anecdotes and Dan's Quirks
00:53:46
Speaker
you watch the guy walks into the saloon with the Spurs He's got so much change in each of his pockets and Pocket no, they'll always the left pocket, but he jangled and he jangled
00:54:01
Speaker
Every time he went up the ball. I'm sorry, but if you're going to have the pockets, the cargo pockets, you utilize them. All right. You don't just.
00:54:10
Speaker
If you want to utilize them, that's fine. I think Tim and I were just hopefully wondering, one of these days you would actually realize that maybe perhaps you should button said cardboard pocket when we went bowling. So not every time the three of us went bowling, we had to wait, you know, 20 minutes as you collected, you know, roughly $52 worth of quarters all over the goddamn lane.
00:54:32
Speaker
Where is the fun in that? I mean, and like Tim was saying, it was like, oh, oops, I dropped some change on the area where you can walk. No, Dan shop hooded the dollars of quarters all up onto the oiled bowling lane and then had to awkwardly crawl and snag them while hoping we don't get in trouble while walking on the lane. Well, I had to get my change. Plus, it would ruin the next person's ball.
00:55:01
Speaker
And then he had to get those three-year-old gumballs that never changed out of the machine on the way out. He would chew it roughly for five minutes. The time we get the car... It's flavor. Once the flavor is gone, there's no point of chewing gum. I don't think our listeners understand the caliber of your obsession with vending machine gumballs. Especially the sour ones, man. The amount of time we would spend, for those that are from the great state of Michigan,
00:55:30
Speaker
The great crossing mall had vending machines every quarter mile. It's not a vending machine, they're just gumball machines. Get it right. Well, whatever, vending machine, gumball machines, coin machines, whatever. There were more gumballs in Spaz's mouth than Jess's, nevermind.
00:55:46
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. I got two for her. But stop it. But Dan will walk around like a chipmunk in winter time. Well, yeah, I mean, you got four gumballs with like, like, yeah, four or five gumballs of his mouth. Couldn't talk worth shit. You know, still can't. He'd shoot for roughly about five minutes and then dump it into a garbage shop because they lost their flavor. Then you've got to go back and get more. That's why you have all the quarters in your left cargo pocket.
00:56:17
Speaker
Wallets is in the right cargo. Is this the time that we bring up spazas castanza wallet or no? That wallet yeah, oh my god, it was awful anyways that is why I never skied on it because it's in my right pocket of the cargo
00:56:34
Speaker
That is my overly long rant. Of awesome gumballs? Yeah. Of Tib and I's childhood hanging with spaz. Gotta put them balls in your mouth. I'm saving that clip.
Emotional Impact of Rufio's Death Scene
00:56:50
Speaker
I hope you do. I hope you do too. That's why I said it. I mean, this, this is just a one-time thing, guys. Every single time we went bowling and we went like every week, change everywhere, just,
00:57:02
Speaker
It's just, you just knew it was happening, but he made it rain, but not twice. I like how we're so often to the weeds right now. Our listeners, if they listen to this, if it's not caught or just like, I think I'm just going to say the, uh, spaz is a little quote there. It's going to be my ring tone, a spaz is call. Also, I'm a two, two, two.
00:57:39
Speaker
So so back to hook so I thought that I
00:57:47
Speaker
Rufio's death was one of like the most traumatic, like heart wrenching moments where he's just, he dies and he's slowly like, I wish I had a dad. Just like you. It's like, Oh, then nobody gives a shit that Rufio just died. No one cares. No, I know. They just like moving on. Last boys don't give a shit. Peter Pan gave us no shit after that. It was just like, okay, see ya. I think he mentioned it once in passing. He's like, you killed Rufio. It's like, uh, do you guys remember the super Nintendo game of this?
00:58:17
Speaker
Uh, I do not. Oh my God. I, my brother and I played this game all the time and it was like on the same caliber of difficulty as the Lion King in Aladdin. It was just fucked a lot. Fuck a lot, man. So hard, but it was fun. I just kept playing it. But anyway, I just had to bring it up because just super Nintendo memories are always fun to talk about. Um, then of course at the very end. All right.
00:58:45
Speaker
Everybody, you know, they, they woke up in the morning and the kids just suddenly reappeared in their beds and then Tootle starts flying around the room and everyone's just like, you know what? Fuck it. This, this stays weird. Let's just go for it. And he's just, okay. We'll just embrace the fact that this dude just starts flying away and does cartwheels in the space. I don't know. That movie got real weird. I was like, it felt like, like they didn't know how to wrap it up and they were just like, yeah, we should get Tootles to fly around real weird. And like, everyone's just like totally cool with this. Yeah. And I was like, huh?
00:59:13
Speaker
Speaking of trimming things that didn't need to be in the movie. Right. Add it to the list. But all that said and done, I still just watched this film, just brought me back. It was just, it was a lot of fun. There was some great comedy bits to it. This is one of those. I literally just burned in my brain, like every scene, sound effect, facial expression. I could just play it in my head before it happened. And there's not very many films that I just literally know.
00:59:41
Speaker
everything including sound effects that are about to happen and this was one of those so it was long it's way too long for this film i
00:59:51
Speaker
I don't know what to say other than they could probably trim out a significant portion of it and it wouldn't change the story at all. It would be more enjoyable to watch because it would be more consistent. But again, it's just a fun, magical world. The sets were fun. The acting was great. I love Dustin Hoffman in this. I didn't know it was Dustin Hoffman as a kid because I just didn't know who he was.
01:00:16
Speaker
When I got older and found out who Dustin Hoffman was, I'm like, holy crap, it was Hook. I thought it was great. He was just, he was awesome as that role, even though I think some people just said he just, he failed at it, but I don't, I don't understand that. I thought he killed it. It was great. Yeah. Who says that he failed at it? Some of the critics. Oh, I always thought he got, I always thought he got accolades out of the entire movie. Like, you know, the movie's not great, but like Dustin Hoffman as Hook was fantastic. He really was.
01:00:44
Speaker
I was telling Dana that his laugh reminded me of Stanley Tucci and the Hunger Games. So if they ever redo Hook and they need a good pirate, Stanley Tucci could be the guy. I love Stanley Tucci. He's the man. I'm not going to come in with a nine like Spaz did, but an 8.5 because it is still a very magical piece of cinema, something I will always cherish, even though there's a lot more adult humor than I remember.
01:01:12
Speaker
But that's just the way it goes when you're a kid watching these things like, um, Hey hooks gonna shoot himself in the head. That's not funny. Um, joke. I'm not going to lie though. That that's, you know, it's me, it's me, it's me. Get over here. Right. Stop me, sweet. Stop me. It's me. Stop me. And then you got Robin Williams calling a Rufio, a near sighted gynecologist. It's like, Oh, I didn't not know what that was when I was a kid, but
01:01:40
Speaker
Yeah, that one, I was surprised when it popped up there because I had the subtitles on because I am apparently 95 years old. Oh, we all do it. Yeah. And I was like, did it just, did it just say nearsighted gynecologist? I was like, I do not, I'm glad I, you know.
01:01:58
Speaker
I didn't watch this and I was like a questioning kid or something like that. Like, mom, dad, what's a gynecologist? You start running around calling people a nearsighted gynecologist. Yeah. My mom's like, where'd you pick it up? Uh, hook. Yeah. With our scores combined, it gives us a 7.9 on the hook meter, which is a whole point higher than IMDB. So again, that's what happens sometimes with nostalgia films. It just, it doesn't matter how good or bad something is. It just hits your right and it's not going to change too much.
01:02:27
Speaker
So with that, Nicole, hopefully we did it justice. Thank you for your patience while we did this. It's a magical film. So thank you for requesting it. And I hope you enjoy this film, but for everybody else, thank you for checking out this episode and listening to our podcast on Second Watch. So of course, follow us, support us on OSW podcast.com.
01:02:48
Speaker
All the socials just engage with us, have some fun. The next movie review. Dana, do you want to announce what your spin the wheel category is going to be? Yes. Let's do a drum roll, please. Yeah. Lay it on us. Wait, wait. Do we usually put this in the episode? We started to now. Surprise. So I have a title for my category. It's called the Dana.
01:03:14
Speaker
And the requirements are that it has to be a movie you have never seen and you want to see, and that everybody can access. It also has to be, it can't be past rated R. It's past. I like how there's a special rule for dance porn addiction. So Debbie does Dallas is on.
01:03:36
Speaker
My only requirement though, my only real requirement though, is it has to be a movie you haven't seen. Because I want you guys to feel like I do sometimes. I like this. At first I was like, oh, the Dana, it's going to be movies that only Dana has seen. We have not now. It's like two movies. Nope. I want you guys to feel like I do, but I also hope that maybe you'll enjoy it along the way.
01:04:06
Speaker
I don't know. It's a very open category and I think everybody can find something that they like out of that or might like. I don't know. I think so. It'll be fun. Fun to explore. Yeah. That one's that one. I'm looking forward to that. All right. So with that, we got some planning to do some more. I have, I think I have four episodes now. I have not edited so we can take a little break and nobody would know.
01:04:35
Speaker
This is the time I tell you I'm really busy coming up. That's right, exactly. So thanks again for listening guys and we'll check your next movie review.