Transcript
Speaker: from the award -winning second highest rated podcast in the world according to some guy named Phil making your grandmother blush since 2020 and on second watch production you're now listening to season 2 let's make a movie a plot summary Mad Libs podcast at the request of our horror movie connoisseur
Speaker: The first horror movie that we're going to give the on second watch treatment is another cult classic from the crazy mind of John Carpenter. And that's 1980s American supernatural horror thriller film, The Fog. I know Dana is so excited to explore another John Carpenter movie. Hold on to your pants. It's about to get real. Hold on. What's that one? What's that one movie? Hold on to your halo. It's about to get biblical.
Speaker: Wasn't that like - Wasn't that movie Legion or whatever? I think so. Oh god, what a shitty movie. That was a good class. Another one being portrayed so altogether.
Speaker: Anyway, yes, the fog. Yeah, the fog. This is back in John Carpenter's wheelhouse. I don't know. I mean, big trouble is big trouble. This, this is back. This is what John Carpenter's made of is, is taking a, you know, pretty, pretty basic, you know, plot point and turning it into a horror movie and doing it with the shoe stringiest of budgets ever.
Speaker: Um, you know, this, this movie had a budget of about $1 million. This was back in the eighties. So yeah, a million dollars was, was, you know, it's not chump change back in the eighties, but for a movie, that's, that's nothing. And, um, I mean, you compare that to, man, what was big trouble? Uh, that was, Oh gosh, it was a $25 million budget.
Speaker: and it made like 11 million in the box office. So a little different with, uh, with the fog here. So with a 1 .1 around million dollar budget, they made 21 million in the box office. It's often regarded as a very underrated, often skipped over horror movie, but most people that have seen it and kind of rank it up in their horror movie classics, it's always going to be called out as one of the, their favorite horror films.
Speaker: And I think I was trying to go back to our previous episodes. Chris, I think you've brought this movie up five times. Probably, yeah. I will champion this movie, like you said. It is a blast to watch. Is it super scary? No. But is it fun? Yeah, absolutely. It came two years after the original Halloween.
Speaker: But it's a ghost story. And I always enjoy ghost stories. I like something a little bit. I get tired a little. I get a little burned out of the super monster, the slasher serial killers. I love horror. I do not care much for the super graphic stuff like hostile. I don't find that entertaining. So when someone's like, I got a ghost story, and it's kind of creepy, kind of fun,
Speaker: Cool, a little bit different. Let's watch it. And that's like the fog checks all those boxes. Yeah, right now an IMDB last I checked was a 6 .8. So that's holding pretty good for a 1980s film, right? Yeah, exactly. I mean, and remember, too, like it came two years after Halloween. And you know, it has, you know, Jamie Lee Curtis, Adrian Barboa, Tom Atkins, you know, there's there's quite a decent, decent amount of people in it. There is.
Speaker: And I mean, they did try to rejuvenate it, if you will, back in 2005 with that got awful remake. I'm not going to even. Yep. It's just like, yep, that thing happened. And then it should be buried right next to like the Atari ET video game and, um, never spoken about like ever.
Speaker: Well, I, uh, I did look that movie up because I was curious and, um, I mean, globally it made 46 million and it stands on IMDB with a whopping 3 .7. Yeah. It wasn't, it wasn't, it wasn't very good at all. Yeah. It started off okay. And then like, I haven't seen it forever. And then just like tail spun into like this like stupid, like love interest thing. And like this weird, like, like weird history with all, I was like, what, what just, it's a ghost story.
Speaker: Yeah, I had to know. So I read the plot and the rundown and what happens at the end of the movie for that version of it. And it's just awful. Anyway, that's why we're not doing that film. We're talking about the classic. Yes, please. Thank you. The classic, The Fog. All right. So I have some good news and some bad news. A trick or treat, if you will.
Speaker: We are going to play Mad Libs again. Oh man. Um, what are you talking about? I'm messing around. So we're, we're going to have fun with that. The trick, the bad news is we're not going to play over under this time. Oh snap. What?
Speaker: The reason why is I searched high and low for questions I could ask about this film and I couldn't find anything that was worth a damn because there's there's no language the amount of people that dies it's it's in the plot of the film so I mean I can't and that's what makes it hilarious this movie is actually rated R and there's like I'm not gonna go I'm not gonna go into further yeah and it's funny because I think like there's like minimum language if any like there's like minimum gore
Speaker: Like I said, it's a ghost story, but yet somehow I got slapped with an R rating. Man. Yeah. Cause I, I was searching high and low for language. There's, there's no F bombs. I think there's calling someone and an asshole.
Speaker: But that's about it. So I guess let's let the vulgarity fly in Mad Libs or something. Well, hold on. Let me, let me rephrase that. Let's keep it at a PG -13 R -ish at most, but kind of keep it at PG -13 level. Not NC -17 level spaz.
Speaker: So let's jump into some Mad Lips, because I, just like last time, just took the plot rundown from IMDB and replaced a bunch of words, the different adjectives and nouns. So let's give this a whirl and see if it's as humorous as I think it's gonna be, because I think it's gonna get a little awkward. So let's have some fun. Now let's first, I need an adjective from anybody.
Speaker: Spooky. Not spooky. Spooky. Wow. We were right there already. Yep. I'm ready. Wow. Lock and load. Okay. So SPO PPY or SPOOPY. That is correct. Cool. I just want to make it out loud, Tim. Thanks. I'm gonna
Speaker: I'm going to change the rules of this game. I need a city and a state. City and a state? Does it have to be like, like the city and the state are going to be anything? I don't make the rules, man. Hey, man, I'm just asking questions. All right. Okay. Francisco, California, done. No, that's boring. Boring.
Speaker: Blame! Alright. Pick something else then. Columbus, Ohio. Get out of here! Bismarck, North Dakota. There we go! Perfect. Bismarck. Population 5. I honestly have no idea. I'm sure it's my cup of tea. It's nice and open with mountains and I would love to move there probably.
Speaker: Yeah. Lots of fun. Oh, lots of fun. Sign me up right now. All right. One more adjective. Obnoxious. I think she was thinking of me. No, pretty bad. Do we have another adjective as well? You need two of them? Yeah, why not? Repulsive. Say repulsive. She did. Yes.
Speaker: She is thinking about this. I'm really pissed you off last time we did this. No. She's just jealous of all the pizza you have. I am jealous of your pizza because I didn't eat dinner, so I'm hungry. Hungry like a wolf. So this is a perfect next ask is I need one of our one of us, one of the on second watch hosts.
Speaker: Carrie. Oh yeah, if one of us is gonna die, it's me. Throw me in there. Yep, yep, yep, going down swinging. Yep. All right, now I need a proper noun. Anybody? Oreo? I'm really, obviously hungry, sorry. Dana's really hungry. This is our food -related mad lips.
Speaker: person proper noun or i can go with oreo whatever i feel like oreo adds a little bit of you know just let the cookie crumble tim goddamn it oh yes how about a past tense verb exasperated okay just just
Speaker: Things just pop into my mind, man. What? Cheese. Did you say cheese? Did you say steak? I said steak. Well, now I'm all excited. You ever park your bike in an airplane hangar? Did you ever drop a toothpick in a volcano? God, it would be so bad.
Speaker: And in case anyone is curious, the movie we are referencing is - Dude's Bigelow Male Gigolo. Yeah, the classic. Yeah, Dude's Bigelow Male Gigolo. Thanks, Raph Shatak. I don't know if I want to keep going here. Oh, you do. I want you to keep going. All right, fine. Noun. Noun me, bitches. Ass. I mean, here's PG -13. That counts. That counts. How about another down? Wood.
Speaker: I'm in my basement. Give me a break. I'm looking at the wood pillars. Oh, dear God. How about another noun? Tent. That was way too quick. Thank you. Amazing. I need two more nouns. Oh, you shouldn't have asked. Pizza.
Speaker: Pizza foot, yeah. Alright, thanks guys. I've heard of Pizza the Hutt, now we have Pizza the Foot. We should watch that movie too. Yes, yes we should.
Speaker: We, I don't remember when this was, but we decided on Spaceballs and then I started prepping for it and then we pivoted. Shocking. Was it something coming out and we were like, oh, sweet. We're going to do that. And then with like COVID and stuff, it got delayed and then things got lost in the shuffle, I think. That probably sounds right. COVID messes up everything. I'm looking at it right now. Spaceballs is listed out on my list of movies that I started prepping for. Good. That's a classic.
Speaker: Absolutely. All right. I need a plural noun. Turtles. I like turtles. I like turtles. You should have said bunnies. No, no, man. Turtles. Turtle. I suggest you go watch the I like turtles YouTube video. Yes, you should. Never.
Speaker: I think it was during Halloween, too. Yes, it had to have been because, uh... He wasn't even a zombie or something? Yeah, he was dressed as a zombie, so yeah, it's perfect. Perfect. And sticking with the nouns, I need a plural noun. Come on, guys. Oh, God. Women. Oh, no. Women better rule the world by the end of this, Mad Lib, or you're in trouble for that. I don't give a shit. Not the first time.
Speaker: It smells like I got pizza, man. I don't give a rip. Yeah, I really don't. I'm so hungry. Stop talking about pizza. All I want is Oreos and pizza, apparently, now. Oh, man. I got some potato hamburger buns. So good.
Speaker: What are you doing with the pizza? You're going to put the pizza in the hamburger buns? You're going to have your pizza burger? No, I'm... Ooh. Yeah, right. Yeah, don't tell me. No, you got to do it the other way. Use the pizza slices as the buns. Yeah, that's a good call right there. I'll save the potato buns for later.
Speaker: yeah right do it for like boring but use them as the buns with the burger but oh my god please my cholesterol I don't even know
Speaker: We just talked about this. I've never done this. I say as a theory, I've never put this to the test. Sure you haven't. If anybody on Earth has done it, I trust that it's you. Honestly, where would I be? Would I have a choice between hamburgers and pizza? Where in this place is, it sounds magical. Dude, there's a, I don't know if they still do it, but there was a place out by you in Fenton that did it. It was like a buffet?
Speaker: No, it was a they it was a restaurant and they made a pizza burger like yeah, yeah, what they call it the widow maker.
Speaker: I don't know. I think it was called pizza burger, but Jesus Christ, it sounds terrible. Like, I mean, does it sound funny theory? Probably off tangent now, but now I'm really concerned about people eating this on a daily basis. That sounds extremely. I don't. Well, it sounds amazing to me. I would try, like try it, but I don't know if they do it anymore. This was like five or six years ago. Shut it down because of all the cardiac arrests. Worth it. Anyways.
Speaker: on our new podcast, Pizza and Burgers. I was going to say this is like a callback to when we first started out where we just started talking about food nonstop. It actually is. Spaz and Chris would eat. Food mashup. What? You don't want to hear that? I don't want to hear you guys eating.
Speaker: No, we're not. We're not. We're talking about. We're talking about. We're talking about eating. Come on. It's one of the things we love to do to talk about eating. Like you're not going to end up eating while talking about eating. No, this is like, this is work for me. I don't, I don't think so. I guess I guess we should reel it back in a little bit here. I guess we should talk about movies as much as I enjoy pizza and burgers possibly at the same time.
Speaker: So as a reminder, let's keep this R at the most. I need a verb. Flexing. All right. One more verb. Oogling. How about a noun? All right, I'm done. I already did two. Sock.
Speaker: Oh god, I don't want to - I just want to just love it, just like write it - Sock, not socks, one. Singular sock. Well, you didn't say plural now until - Exactly. It's true. It's not fair. Fair enough, fair enough, fair enough. All right, let's, uh, I need two adjectives. Chubby. Chubby. Chubby, and what was it? Scintillating. Oh, perfect. Absolutely terrific. Chubby scintillating.
Speaker: Gotta go update my Tinder profile. Hey man, just get a template for a profile and a little bad lips of shit out of it. At this point in time of my life, that sounds like it would be better traction than what I got now. So we might do that. I got. All right. One more now and then we're done. Mahogany.
Speaker: It's very woodsy down in my basement, I'm sorry. I don't know, it's a beautiful basement. My parents have a nice rustic theme and I'm just, you know, I keep thinking of Anchorman and it smells of rich mahogany. All right, you guys ready for this? Cause I'm here. All right, I better, I'm seated. Let's do this. All right.
Speaker: our mad libs for the fog. As the centennial of the spoopy town of Bismarck, North Dakota approaches, obnoxious activity begins to occur at midnight. 100 years ago, the repulsive leper, Carrie... Oh, that made my day. Oh, no.
Speaker: 100 years ago, the repulsive leper Carrie bought the clipper ship Oreo and exasperated with her ass. This is terrible! Exasperated ass, I'll get you. Well, I would name a ship Oreo, so that tracks out. Yeah, I can actually see that. Yeah. Exasperated with her ass to form the wood colony. Oh god.
Speaker: Does it even make sense? It's okay. However, while sailing through a thick tent... Oh god. The thickest. They were deliberately misguided by a foot on shore. Steering the course of the ship toward the pizza and crashing it against the turtles.
Speaker: Fucking turtles. I knew they'd get you. I want my pizza. While the town's women prepared to flex, it was the heinous crime that the town's founders committed oogling from the sock to claim retribution. It doesn't make sense. It's okay. It's all right. Under the cover of the chubby, scintillating mahogany,
Speaker: They carry out their vicious attacks, searching for what is rightfully theirs. Wow. And scene. I'm just going to throw it out there. We've talked about how I eat my candy, how I'm going to eat Twizzlers, and now apparently I'm like exasperating with my ass. I'm just throwing it out there. Right? That's gonna be me. Wow. I'm sorry, Carrie. Carrie's got a lot going on over there. I really do. I still love you. Love you too.
Speaker: You bring a certain element to this podcast, that's for sure. Yeah, like leprosy. That exasperated ass. And there we have it. Our Mad Libs.
