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EP181: Adam Allred - Make America Sane Again!
86 Plays24 days ago
“Men need to get their house in order. This isn’t a female issue—it’s a masculine issue right now.”
In a world that seems intent on erasing traditional masculinity, the need for strong, purpose-driven men has never been greater. The modern narrative has left many men struggling to define their roles, disconnected from their inherent strengths, and unprepared to face life’s challenges. The solution lies in reclaiming the values of resilience, responsibility, and community, which have long been at the heart of what it means to be a man. Men need to rediscover their purpose, rebuild their tribes, and stop letting societal pressures dilute their potential.
Drawing from decades of experience mentoring young men, our guest, Adam Allred, identifies how societal narratives have stripped men of the framework they need to thrive. He emphasizes that many young men today lack the tools to face adversity because they’ve been conditioned to avoid it. He explores the devastating consequences of fatherless homes, the erosion of male mentorship, and the societal shift that isolates men from their tribes. Yet, his insights aren’t just critiques—they’re a call to action. By reconnecting with other men, embracing responsibility, and prioritizing their roles within families and communities, men can reclaim their strength and purpose.
Adam is a seasoned entrepreneur, sales expert, and advocate for modern masculinity. With over 20 years of experience training and mentoring thousands of young men in the high-pressure world of door-to-door sales, he’s seen firsthand the struggles and triumphs of building resilience. Today, he uses his platform to inspire men of all ages to reject societal narratives that weaken them and embrace the values of strength, leadership, and purpose.
Learn more and connect:
• The End of Woman by Carrie Gress
• Jordan Peterson’s talks on the patriarchy and masculinity
@AdamAllredOfficial
You’re invited to come to a Sovereign Circle meeting to experience it for yourself. To learn more, go to https://www.sovereignman.ca/. While you’re there, check out the Battle Ready program and check out the store for Sovereign Man t-shirts, hats, and books.
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Transcript
The Role of Men in Society: Responsibility and Challenges
00:00:00
Speaker
now which is men need to get their house in order. This isn't ah you know a female issue. This is a masculine issue right now. And I think I firmly believe that every ill we're seeing in society today stems somewhere with a man not showing up. Good tribes make good men. That's that's how it works. and But now in this modern society that we're living in, we have been conditioned to give up our tribes and basically just place a female as our primary purpose in life.
00:00:33
Speaker
You're a man living in the modern world in a time when men and manhood are not what they once were. You live life on your own terms. You're self-sufficient. You think for yourself and you march to the beat of your own drum. When life knocks you down, you get back up because in your gut, you know that's what men do.
Introduction to Sovereign Man Podcast with Adam Allred
00:00:54
Speaker
You're a badass and a warrior. And on the days when you forget, we are here to remind you who you really are Welcome to the Sovereign Man podcast, where we aim to make men mask in. Again, I'm your man, Nicky Baloo. We have a very special guest lineup for you today, Adam Allred. Welcome, Adam. Nicky, glad to be here, man. I love the hat. Appreciate it, brother. Adam, um we spoke off camera. I told you I've been following some of your work. Fucking love what you talk about.
00:01:28
Speaker
um A bunch of my listeners will probably know who you are, but some of them won't.
Adam Allred's Journey: Sales and Life Lessons
00:01:32
Speaker
Why don't you start by telling us your story of how you got involved in this work? yeah so um i What I do for a living is is built around I build businesses primarily through door-to-door sales marketing. I've been doing this for 20-something years. I started doing it when I was in college to pay for school. I'd leave for the summertime.
00:01:53
Speaker
and ah I would work for the three and a half months or four months of summer to earn money so I could pay for tuition and and you know just general living expenses. and In Utah, it's kind of getting more nationwide, but in Utah, it's still a huge industry. It's very competitive and it's almost like a rite of passage for for most young men. If they haven't been hit up a million times on campus, ah you know it's just it's just unheard of now. There's so many companies out recruiting the college kids to go send them out, knock doors, and build businesses that way.
00:02:24
Speaker
So that's my my work. That's my career. I've done it for years. And um I've literally trained, hired, managed thousands and thousands of mostly young men, some young women, but mostly young men that come out and do this job. And it's the hardest thing that these guys have ever done in their lives. you know They're knocking doors all day long in summer heat in some part of the country, ah trying to you know sell a product or a service.
00:02:49
Speaker
um There's obviously a lot of negativity associated with that. There's a lot of rejection. And so these guys often, they're just waking up every day on repeat for an entire summer facing the most difficult day of their lives. It's like Groundhog's Day.
00:03:01
Speaker
two So I've trained these guys and I've seen over the years, because i'm because I'm so connected in this process with these younger guys, this constant new generation of guys coming into college, I've really been able to see ah what young guys these days are struggling with, and
The Crisis of Masculinity: Lack of Guidance and Role Models
00:03:17
Speaker
not just young guys. I mean, as I've started using the social media platform to share my thoughts and things that I think are helpful for people, for men, um I'm finding that there's just so many guys, guys my age, guys even older than I am, I'm 44.
00:03:30
Speaker
that are living in states of quiet desperation. You got these young guys coming up right now. they don't They don't have a clue what it means to be a man. They want to come out and do this job. They're ready to level up. They want to make some money. They want to improve themselves. They don't even have a framework for how to face adversity. And so their heart is willing, but they don't have the abilities or the you know the mindset to be able to go through this really difficult thing. And so I've seen over the years more and more guys that we've sent out for the summer just quit and go home because it's it's just not they don't have it in the tank to to do it. They don't have the but mentality.
00:04:00
Speaker
And you know something that I've just observed over the years is that we have tragically really attacked masculinity as a society. We look down on it. ah We disparage it. um It's toxic. And so these boys, because they you know this is kind of the conditioning of society, we're seeing a lot of boys that are no longer being raised by fathers. Either the father is gone.
00:04:24
Speaker
because he wasn't a man to step up and feel his responsibilities like he should have, or he was pushed out by a toxic mother who you know treated him really poorly. um And the court systems tend to favor females. So you have boys that are being raised predominantly by women. And even if there's a man in the house, one thing that I've observed in conversations I've had with others as well is that oftentimes he's not taking an active role in mentoring or coaching his sons anymore.
00:04:47
Speaker
you know He kind of shows up, he comes home from work, sits on the couch, opens up you know can opens a can of beer, watches football, you know maybe does a little bit of a you know whatever around the house. But there's just more and more boys coming up that are not knowing what it means to be a man. And I'm seeing that firsthand through the work that I do. so I started, yeah I did so reluctantly, but I started just sharing things that I had taken from this career ah of doing door to door sales and training these guys and trying to generalize it and share it with a broader audience of men.
00:05:19
Speaker
so that at least there would be something you know imperfect as as my messages are. I don't pretend like I've arrived and figured it out, but I've i've made a lot of strides in my life. I've had a lot of lot of notable successes that I'm proud of. But um I'm trying to share with these guys something that can give them some framework, something that makes sense. And so that's how the journey started. I started posting up some content about a year and a half ago.
00:05:45
Speaker
and my fourth or fifth reel went to like a few million views. I didn't have any followers. I was totally shocked. Like it just flew off the handle and then a lot of people started following my content.
Finding Support: Men's Groups and Rebuilding Masculinity
00:05:54
Speaker
and I've been creating content ever since and just becoming ever my my my ah my assumptions.
00:06:01
Speaker
about what's going on in society have just been proven more and more through the communication that I'm getting from literally hundreds and thousands of hundreds and thousands, not hundreds of thousands, hundreds and thousands of men that are reaching out to me, telling me they needed to hear this, telling me, confirming what I'm saying right now that they don't know what it means to be a man, you know struggling with this whole idea of masculinity, having no idea what their purpose is. And so that's the that's how this this whole thing got started.
00:06:30
Speaker
I love it. I got a lot for me to learn from you around how by authentically sharing your heart, you were able to get views because that's one thing I want to figure out how to do because this is an important topic to me. um In September 2009, seemingly out of the blue, my then wife decides she didn't want to be with me anymore. And I was shocked.
00:06:59
Speaker
um I should have seen it coming, but I totally didn't. And um I went into a downward spiral. Didn't make any money for about a year. Sleeping on my mother's couch. Couldn't see my kids for a few months. And I went into a bad place. I was blaming her and not taking any responsibility. And what saved me was other men.
00:07:24
Speaker
I got together with men in the form of what today is being called repeatedly, Abandoned Brothers, but back then we just called it a men's group, right? And um there was a man ah who ran the first one ah professionally. um I paid him a lot of money to be a part of that group. I met with the men there every week. I was with him for a year and a half. And then I joined another group, which I didn't pay for.
00:07:52
Speaker
And I was in that group for, God, eight years. And then I started my own group with another man. We ran it for free until about two and a half, three years ago. And then we started charging us token amount of money just because we found that when men pay, they got skin in the game. um And I think men are lost and it's not just young men. If anything, the younger men are using social media and men like yourself and podcasts like mine to self-educate. I'm more concerned for the millennial age men, you know, and even the men my age. I'm a little older than you are. I'm 57. And a lot of those dudes don't know what the hell it is to be a man.
00:08:39
Speaker
states of quiet desperation. That's ah a paraphrasing of a quote by Henry David Thoreau, right? Most men go through life leading lives of quiet desperation. so um It's a big deal, man. It's a big deal. And this phrase, toxic masculinity, I'm doing everything in my power to make it the new N word. They're not going to be able to say it out in polite company by the time I'm done with them. Amen to that. Amen to that. we A lot of men need to be starting to start treating it like that. That's how actually toxic phrase. It is a very toxic, unhelpful. real n-w word You're not allowed to say it in my in my presence. I will lift your head off. Yeah. love it Yeah.
00:09:19
Speaker
So Adam, um what do we need to do to help these young men and not so young men figure out what the heck it means to be a man and how to live like a man?
00:09:32
Speaker
Well, I mean, you just articulated what what what I think we're supposed to be doing right now, which is men need to get their house in order. This isn't ah you know a female issue. This is a masculine issue right now. And I think I firmly believe that every ill we're seeing in society today stems somewhere with a man not showing up.
00:09:51
Speaker
um And so I think it's us coming together as men talking about it, creating groups, creating communities, creating bands of brothers, um where we can share this stuff, level each other up. You know, for thousands of years, well since the dawn of humankind, men have gathered around literal fires.
00:10:08
Speaker
you know they They sat around the fires every single night. They planned where they were going to go hunt. They held each other accountable. They planned out who they were going to go to war with, where they're going to migrate. ah and we have we so we've We've evolved that way to live in tribes, and good tribes make good men. That's that's how it works. um and But now in this modern society that we're living in, we have been conditioned to give up our tribes.
00:10:35
Speaker
and basically just ah place a female as our primary purpose in life. as our primary and purpose in life.
The Influence of Feminism on Family and Relationships
00:10:45
Speaker
And so men have been divided. They've been separated. And they're living, like we said, in these states of quiet desperation. And and it goes deeper than that. So here's ah kind of an unpopular truth. I've done some research on this. And I actually read a book by a woman we're called ah End of Woman. And she started off as a feminist apologist. She was writing this book so that she could explain feminism to the world. And instead, what she discovered was
00:11:11
Speaker
um in In the conception of feminism, she discovered a whole bunch of stuff that was really, really bad. and One of the things was that feminism's avowed purpose in its early inception, quoted from their leaders, was that they wanted essentially to destroy this traditional family. They wanted to elevate women, which was a good thing out of you know basically servitude, which is where women have served for many years for centuries.
00:11:36
Speaker
um But their goal was to basically demonize masculinity and then destroy what we as a society as a culture value as femininity virtue, ah creativity, nurturing, childbearing, all of the things that nature has conditioned us. And we've evolved over thousands of years to treat as what is beautiful and feminine. and Femininity, with feminism was a clear and present attack on that. So over the years, ah the traditional family has just eroded and it's stemmed a lot from feminism. Now, I'm not blaming necessarily feminism. Men didn't stand up to this and a lot of men encouraged it and supported it. And even early on,
00:12:10
Speaker
you get late That's why they did it, those bastards. Fucking late. And that's how it started with men. They were like, cool, free sex. Yeah, women are empowered by stacking up the biggest body count they can get. So men are taking literally preying on women. This is, again, a man issue. They're fostering and encouraging this nonsense. It gets out of control and it gets actually hijacked by the communist movement.
00:12:30
Speaker
And the communists used this as a way to destroy, feminists they they they linked up with feminists and they used it away as a way to destroy the traditional family because in communism the state should be all-powerful and everything else needs to be subservient to that. And as long as there's a strong family unit with a husband and father acting in the natural traditional divine roles that God has given them, it stands contrary to the power of the state.
00:12:52
Speaker
And so we're seeing what is what what has just transpired as a completely corrosive force on the family, on societies, on communities, on everything else. And so what do we do about this? You ask, well, we speak up about it. We start acting, we start acting like men again. Men used to not tolerate bullshit in any, yeah like that was one of the like quintessential definitions of masculinity is if there was some bullshit, you called it out and you did not buy into that or subscribe to it.
00:13:16
Speaker
But we live in this upside down world where men have been conditioned to basically accept women at whatever terms they say we need to accept a map. And what that's equated to is, as mentioned earlier in the podcast, a lot more single women raising boys and these boys having no idea what it means to be a man because a woman cannot teach a boy how to be a man.
00:13:39
Speaker
And that is not a knock on single mothers. There's a lot of great single mothers out there. I'm not trying to demonize a group of people, but it is a reality that women cannot teach boys how to be men. And that has been a colossal problem for us as a society. Are these boys growing up in a feminine space, coming into adulthood? They're not even looking for a a partner. They're not looking to lead in a family. They're not even looking to be respected because they haven't been raised to gain respect. They've been raised to look for love, look for nurturing, and someone to wipe their nose and tell them me it's going to be okay. They go through a feminine school system and then they roll into these relationships with a woman. They ditch their tribe immediately because that's how they've been conditioned and they're no longer looking to be a man in that relationship. They're looking for another mother to replace the mothers of their youth. They're looking for a woman to give them purpose and to center their life around. And
00:14:31
Speaker
that even if a woman loves a man like that, she doesn't respect him. And the the huge problem is that women are not attracted to men they don't respect. And so they they're not. And so it doesn't matter if they love him or not. You'll have women say that all the time. I love my husband, but then they're cheating on him. They're stepping out on this because they don't respect him. If a woman respects a man she doesn't cheat on, there's not even a desire for a woman to cheat on him.
00:14:50
Speaker
But if she doesn't respect him, it doesn't matter how much she loves him, it doesn't matter how much she, ah you know, how vulnerable he is or how much he opens up his emotions and feelings to her, she's not going to respect him and she's not going to be attracted to him. And so we're seeing this whole disintegration across the board. And it takes us as men to come back together and start talking about what masculine is, start demanding that we start acting like men again and stepping up and filling in the roles that our ancestors filled before us, if we're going to have any hope of turning this this ship around.
Examining Gender Roles and Political Impacts
00:15:17
Speaker
Well,
00:15:19
Speaker
You've said a lot and I wanna unpack it. ah So you talked about feminism and how the leaders of the original feminist movement wanted to destroy the traditional family by demonizing masculinity and destroying traditional femininity. Things like being chased, things like being ah nurturing, you know raising families, all that stuff. And I 100% agree with you. The one thing I'll push back with you on is this whole idea that women have been in servitude. I don't agree with that.
00:15:47
Speaker
I don't agree with that for one second. So I'm originally from Iran, okay? I was born in Iran. I'm a Christian from Iran. My family escaped after... left. I shouldn't say escaped. We didn't literally escape, but we left after the Islamic Revolution.
00:16:00
Speaker
And I can tell you this, my father, he's he's gone now, he passed ah five years ago. But um if you knew him in his prime, this was a larger than life, man's man, alpha male. You know what I mean? Tough as nails, black belts in two different martial arts.
00:16:20
Speaker
dressed in ah suits, custom-made suits from Savile Row in in London, you know, ran his own entrepreneurial business, made a lot of money, but also did shit like hunt and fix shit around the house, you know, worked with his hand, like just an all-around masculine man's man, very good looking, all of that. And in public, my mother deferred to him. Okay.
00:16:44
Speaker
But my mother fucking ran the family, you know what I mean? And and this is this is how it was in all of Iran. This wasn't just my family. Yes, in public, the dads, the the father, the man, big deal.
00:16:59
Speaker
um Kids need to go to school in Europe. Go make money and make it happen. Okay, sweetheart. I don't like our neighborhood. Go buy a house in this neighborhood and I'll tell you exactly how I want it built. Okay, sweetheart. You didn't make enough money last year. This year, you need to make $250,000 more. You got that? Okay, sweetheart.
00:17:18
Speaker
This is not a joke. This is how my house was. And it wasn't just my house. It was everybody. Iran, a traditional society where the feminist movement in the West thinks women are oppressed. Bullshit. They just let the men think they're in charge. Women have always been in charge. There's a reason why they're in charge. They have half the money and all the pussy. What do men want? Money and pussy. That's all we want. When they're in charge of that,
00:17:45
Speaker
We will do what they want. We will do what they want. And that's a fact. And so I don't agree that they've been in servitude. I i agree that the feminist movement has decided to portray things that way in order to guilt men into ah agreeing with their premise. And that's why men since the mid 60s have been saying, OK, well, we must have been bad. We must have been.
00:18:07
Speaker
male chauvinist pigs or whatever the heck it the the phrase was back in the day. And that's why they did that. So I do agree that the communist movement linked itself up with the feminist movement. And in fact, there's a book that I read called Willing Accomplices. The author's name is Kent Clisby. It rhymes with Frisby. C-L-I-Z-B-E.
00:18:30
Speaker
I highly recommend you pick it up and read it. The man's not a great writer but you still won't be able to put the book down because what he has to say will blow your mind. He was a CIA case officer and he outlines from 1917 to today what the communist movement has done globally to infiltrate the United States in particular and the West in general to weaken the family and to yet to basically degrade the strength of Western men. And it's been extremely successful, as you as you've stated. And there's another fellow, a Russian KGB agent named Yuri Bezmonov. He has a two-hour video that's available on YouTube where he outlines the KGB's country destabilization unit, which he was in charge of.
00:19:20
Speaker
and how they decided to infiltrate America and start to weaken it. This is a multi-decade thing that's been happening since basically 1917. And the only thing that has put a stop to it, in my opinion, maybe temporarily, maybe for good, we'll have to see, has been the election of Donald Trump.
00:19:43
Speaker
The election of Donald Trump is a backlash by the forces of traditional freedom, traditional masculinity, traditional America, because they said, enough of this crap. you know We're not going to let these people destroy our country.
00:19:56
Speaker
and We just have to wait to see if those of us that believe oh in a traditional vision of freedom and a traditional vision of the family are going to be able to stand tall with President Trump and defeat the forces you know of godless, anti-traditional family in order to win. And I'm just wondering what your comments are on that.
00:20:19
Speaker
First of all, I largely agree with everything you're saying. And I think this last election with Donald Trump is probably the most important election in the US has ever had in its history. I mean, the the crossroads was so stark, the the differences of i ideas ideology and what the outcome of that was going to be.
00:20:34
Speaker
And when he got elected, it was like the world went from black and white to color high definition for me. I was like, oh my gosh, I'm a business guy. I know a million other business guys. We all felt the same way. Okay, now we're bullish. Let's go. We've got like, you know, a government that actually makes a little bit of sense now or a lot of sense. I'm a huge fan of Donald Trump's. I've got his, I still have his flag hanging on my house and I I've had it there for months now. Like I i love the man. I think we have. There we go. no See what that says. I can't see it as blurry right now.
00:21:05
Speaker
Endorsed by President Donald J. Trump on True Social. This is one of the books I wrote, basically. oh That's notable indeed, man. I love it. So I agree with you on that with with Donald Trump coming in. We have a fighting chance now to actually turn things around and start making America great again and make it just sane again. Let's not even talk about great. Let's just make it sane again.
00:21:27
Speaker
um What I would say about the feminist movement is I largely agree with you. It's been high deck and the narrative has been ah coerced and manipulated to create exactly what you're talking about. However, I guess what I'm referencing, and I can't speak to ah Iran. First of all, I have to agree with you also. Jordan Peterson talks about this on one of his podcasts with one of the evolutionists.
00:21:45
Speaker
where I can't remember who the guest was specifically, but they were talking about this idea of the the the toxic or the oppressive patriarchy and how largely that's nonsense because exactly what you said, men may be ah you know the front men in terms of the material possessions and in ah token positions of power, but behind the scenes, men do so much, so much what a man does is motivated by his desire for a woman or women or whatever that looks like and women know that and they are masters at pulling the strings and being the king kind of the puppet masters. So I agree with you on all of that. What I do pick up from the initial inception of feminism before it got hijacked by communism back in the late 1800s with you know notable people like Shelley and byron Lord Byron, is that women had no rights at that time in Western civilization. They couldn't go to school. They couldn't vote. They couldn't you know get certain jobs. And so that's where I can meet them a little bit and say, hey, there was a need to give, I believe personally, to give women equal rights with everybody else. ah Women took that. And that so that's what I'm referencing, I should say. When I'm talking about, I shouldn't say servitude, but when I'm talking about
00:22:52
Speaker
um in my opinion, what there was a need for a change. That was what gave them the moral high ground. And then they use that to push all kinds of bullshit into the narrative. That's absolutely insane. And so I think to answer your your question on that, that's where I you know i would where i'd land on that. Yeah, good. Good. Glad to hear that.
Gen Z's Approach to Masculinity and Societal Norms
00:23:13
Speaker
So,
00:23:13
Speaker
um You also said something, and I think it's important ah to break that down a bit, which is men used to not tolerate bullshit. it It was a quintessential trait of being a masculine man, along with keeping your word and being fucking loyal, right? Providing for your family is you don't tolerate bullshit. And what I see happening in the last say two, three years culturally, is that young men, especially these Gen Xers, kind of people my son's age, they are starting to have a very low tolerance for bullshit because the
00:23:52
Speaker
woke movement basically has attacked them told them they're wrong and they're bad and Inside they know they're not wrong or bad They know they're good and they know that they want to do good in the world So they're not tolerating bullshit to the same extent like my two sons I've got a son who's about to turn 19 or another one will turn 17 in a couple of months so my 17 year old He plays two sports, seriously, at a serious level. He plays hockey. and I live in Canada. right He plays a hockey, double A, and that's like four days a week. He also plays soccer at a decent level, and that's another four days a week. He goes to a Catholic school with high standards, so he's got to work his ass off in school on on top of that, and he's got me for a dad, and I'm not a pussy, and I and i push him, and yeah you know I'm constantly challenging him all the time.
00:24:45
Speaker
so His bullshit tolerance is low. And my older son, the one who's about to turn 19, he was all set to go to college in the fall. And he got a job ah with ah the company that I hired a couple of years ago to help me get fit, because I was 227. I lost 58 pounds. I got down to 169 and all that good stuff. I got my sons to work with him. And my older son and the owner of the company hit it off, and he hired him.
00:25:15
Speaker
And two months into his job, he comes to me and he goes, dad, how'd you feel about me not going to school? I want to work full-time. So I called his boss, who has become a friend of mine, and I say, hey, you offering him a full-time job? He says, yeah. He says, listen, I don't want to step on your toes, but I think this kid's good, and I think he'll do well. And you know, school isn't what it used to be, right? um And so what I said ah to him was, OK, go for it, kid. Go for it.
00:25:45
Speaker
So he's 18 years old. He's working seven days a week, probably 10 hours a day. He's training people and doing online coaching. He's making money, so he's not a burden on his mom. He's not a burden on me. um He knows what he wants to do with his life. And a lot of his friends may not be in the same position he is. I mean, they're not you know working full time and all that jazz. But they're all thinking,
00:26:11
Speaker
Screw this BS that people are saying that just because I'm a man, there's something wrong with me. And they're not tolerating that. And i I feel that's a good thing. They need guidance from men like you. They need guidance from men like me. But boy, they seem to be less tolerant of bullshit than, for example, millennials. And I'm wondering what your thoughts are on that.
00:26:34
Speaker
Well, to to speak to that, Trump won the UFO by, I think, 36 points. So it was a massive ah landslide in terms ah of that voting bloc. And I can speak anecdotally, ane anecdotally, if I can say that right.
00:26:48
Speaker
yeah that ah I in my own sphere with young guys that I'm working with and with ah even you know younger kids in high school that are, you know I got a cousin that lives down the street, these guys are all huge Trump supporters. And it's exactly what you're you're saying. The left has nothing to offer them.
00:27:06
Speaker
Nothing. yeah The leftist said you are bad for being a man and their fathers might have accepted it. But I think what they also observe is that a lot of men are just unhappy. I observed that and I'm 44 when I was coming up. My dad wasn't unhappy. My dad's a very happy guy. He's very successful. But I could look around and see so many men.
00:27:24
Speaker
Even in my own family, they were older than the older man, my dad's age, and they were just going through the motions of life. They were completely unhappy, this whole quiet desperation. They're checking boxes of responsibilities. They had been conditioned or neutered by culture, by society, by state and church. And then you've got these younger guys looking at it and saying, like myself, when I was coming up, I don't want that.
00:27:46
Speaker
I've got to pick a different route than that. like I'm smart enough to observe that that doesn't look like the answer for me. And so I'm going to bet on myself and take some risk. And I think you're seeing these younger guys coming up. I think they're like, dude, this is bullshit. I'm not buying into this. so And when you have somebody like Trump coming up and he's saying, look, this is bullshit. And I'm going to show you Trump. if you Whether you like Trump or not, I love him. He is a masculine man. That guy doesn't put up with bullshit. He doesn't get knocked down. even he get He just keeps going. You can't stop that guy. he He speaks his mind. He doesn't care if people are offended by it or not. He says what he thinks. The guy is a freaking titan, and he's a guy that I think a lot of these young men, because there is no option for them on the left. There's nothing as a role model or somebody they want to be like, Tim Waltz, are you kidding me? Like, how could that guy inspire anything? And then you got Kamala Harris, which is probably the most repulsive candidate that we've ever run for president in the history of this country. You know, that's that's what the left's forefronters are. for you know Front runners are. This is them.
00:28:44
Speaker
They're looking at it and saying, no way. And then they listen to a guy like Trump who's saying, you know what? Bullshit. I'm calling bullshit on all this stuff. We're going to change things around. We're going to make America great again. And I think a lot of young men are attaching, oh, he's going to make masculinity great again, because this is what a masculine man looks like.
00:29:01
Speaker
Amen. Amen. I wholeheartedly agree. I wholeheartedly agree. um Nonetheless, what you said, ah I think young men need to pay attention to this.
00:29:13
Speaker
Right? Men need to get together. I mean, from time immemorial, it's one of the things we say in our men's group here, men have gotten around fires. And they they've talked. They've talked about important things. They've gotten ready to go to battle the next day. And getting around fires means you remember the tribe. And good tribes make for good men. A man who's not a part of a tribe is a lost may He's a lost man. So what we want to do is we want more men to metaphorically and physically get together with one another around fires, if at all possible. And I'd love for you to talk about that at much greater length.
00:30:00
Speaker
So, you know, i get the I get surprisingly, but it's also super encouraging, is my message on my social media, as you know, is one guy talking to other guys straight talk, like not trying to sugarcoat anything. My thoughts, i'm not again, I'm not pretending like I'm some sort of profit character that's got it figured out and everybody should follow me, but I'm just trying to say what I actually think.
00:30:20
Speaker
And I think another thing that's going on in society is we're checking out of the experts. We're checking out of the establishment. We know that it's lied to us, it's manipulated us, it's taken advantage of us, treats us like fucking livestock. To the establishment, to the powers that be, we are basically just a resource for them to bleed until the day we die. That's it.
00:30:36
Speaker
And people are checking out of that and they're checking out of the experts because the experts are constantly wrong. They're constantly bought and paid for. And even when they're not bought and paid for, they've gone through some bullshit liberal education. And so they're giving the absolute worst kind of advice. That's not every expert. There are some phenomenal experts out there, but you have to be really choosy because I think most of the quote, quote, experts out there are actually just full of horseshit. And I think a lot of people are seeing that.
00:31:00
Speaker
What I was going to say, though, is what's really encouraging to me is in this space of one man talking to other men, I have had more and more women following my content. I went from probably 10% of my audience followers to 35% of my women now.
00:31:18
Speaker
And most of them, there's some of them in there that are just pop off and they're just there to like stir the pot or whatever. But most of the women are very supportive. And what I'm saying is resonating with them because they know that they want it as well. This is resurgent. It's not just waking up a masculinity. I think a lot of women are waking up to this as well. And I'm having conversations with them. I had a woman message me and I've had this a few times. A woman messaged me and she said, my husband is just not leveling up. He's not getting after it.
00:31:43
Speaker
What can I do? I talk to him. I try to you know get him to light a fire under his ass so he can go out there and be a better man, but it's just not happening. and What I told her and what I really believe is it's not the message it's not the message that's wrong. It's the messenger. A man, whether you're being encouraging or not, it's probably going to come across as criticism. But even if it's not coming across as criticism, if it's coming across as genuine encouragement,
00:32:07
Speaker
A man is going to feel it like he's deficit. And a man never wants to feel that way toward ah from his woman, no matter what, no matter how encouraging it is. A man does not want to feel like from his woman that he is failing. So no matter how much she tries to present it in a way that's palatable to him, it's always going to come across like I'm failing some way. So it's not the message, it's the messenger. And this is what I always tell him, get him around good men.
00:32:29
Speaker
because if he is with good men, he will hear that message. He will see that message in the lives of those good good men that he's around, and he will naturally begin to transform and level up with those guys. We all know this. We hear this all the time. You are the sum of the five people you hang out with the most, but these guys completely cut themselves off from that. so To your point, they're just lost. It's this generation of lost boys, of lost men. They're in this space where the woman is running the house,
00:32:53
Speaker
They're basically just like an ATM machine. They go out, work, bring home the money, pay the bills, and the woman is running everything. And so when you cut a man off from his tribe, you're basically neutering that man. And that's the most important thing I try to convey to these women is get your men around other good men and you will not nat you'll see him start to level up. You will see him start to get ambition back. You'll see him start to like get his work back and to get his purpose back and you'll start to see this enthusiasm for life start to come back into this man because he's spending time with his tribe and he can unload his bullshit there. He can't unload it with his wife.
00:33:28
Speaker
you don't You don't destroy the piece of the home that you're trying to protect by coming home and unloading all your bullshit at home. You take that to your buddies. You're like, because one, your your wife can't help you with it anyways. At most, she can be a sympathetic listener, but it's going to put her in a place of anxiety. It's going to put her in a place of fear if she sees you as weak. And your job as a man to be the rock for her.
00:33:47
Speaker
not to be like some whiny ass little bitch that's unloading all your shit there. That's not your job. And furthermore, if she does try to help you, it puts her into a motherly role where she's not even going to be equipped to give you the skills or the the talk or the communication that you need. It makes her come into this motherly role where she doesn't respect you anymore.
00:34:05
Speaker
Not that you don't communicate with your wife, not that you share, don't share with her things that are going on in your life. But when there's real heavy shit you're dealing with, you go to your buddies because they can relate to it. They can probably help you with it. And at the very least, they're going to be a sounding board of guys that doesn't compromise your masculinity when you take it to a woman.
00:34:21
Speaker
Amen, 100%. I agree with everything you said. That's why we run the groups that we run, and you've you've said it really well, really articulately, and I really appreciate it. um There's a couple things I want to unpack that you've said a little bit earlier. You said that a woman can't teach a young boy how to be a man, and I think women realize this.
00:34:46
Speaker
so I'm not together with my son's mother. And she comes to me constantly and has for years to get me to step in, to show these boys how to behave. And it works.
00:35:03
Speaker
It scares them a little bit, which is good. They need that sometimes, right? They need to think dad might come and lower the boom. And- Oh, don't get me started on gentle parenting, man. That's that's just such bullshit, man. Horseshit, beyond horseshit, beyond horseshit.
Rethinking Feminism and Women's Roles
00:35:18
Speaker
And so that's worked really well for us. um And I gotta tell you, like my 19-year-old son, okay, like they had a gala for the company that he works for on Sunday.
00:35:30
Speaker
um annual awards for the the best Coaches and employees there plus some of their best clients and so I went there um his brother went there his mom and my current lady and We were sitting at a table and I got to meet a lady there who? one of her kids um was a client of theirs, and she became a client. And so she said, oh, so why are you here? And I told her, well, you know, I'm a client and my son is Kayvon. And she says, oh, Kayvon's your son. And she's I said, yeah, she's on him. He's such a good boy. And he's so young too. And I go, yeah, he's 18 still. He turns 19 on Saturday. So in two days, he turns 19. And she said, does he ever tell you, does he ever thank you for what you did for him? Does he ever tell you you did a good job?
00:36:21
Speaker
river She said, but he should, he should tell you that. I kind of thought about it. I said, man, my son is 18. He's working full-time, seven days a week. He's up at 4.30 a.m. most days to go to work. um He's making money. He's not a burden on me and he knows what he wants to do with his life.
00:36:51
Speaker
I raised them. That's all I need. That's all I need. I know, I know I did a good job. I don't need them to come tell me that. I don't need them to come tell me that. You know, pats on the back are for women. I think women need those. Like you got to encourage women a lot more than men. And pats on the back are for folks who know they fucked up. If you know you haven't fucked up, you're doing a good job. you don't i don't Yeah. The reward is the result, right? Straight up, man straight up, straight up. And, um,
00:37:22
Speaker
You know, I think ah women, there's a lot of women that have been sold a bill of goods by the last, um by the culture of the last 60 years. So there's a lot of women that have been fooled and into thinking, oh my God, I don't need a man. They're women in their 20s and 30s, right? And then you see them when they're in their 50s and they're like, oh my God, what the hell? I need a man now. I wish I'd had babies.
00:37:51
Speaker
And my current lady, um so like I told you, I'm 57, she's around my age, she ended up not having kids. She was married and she ended up not having kids.
00:38:04
Speaker
And her biggest regret in life right now is that she didn't have kids. She cries about that. you know It's horrible what these people have done to women. It's worse what they've done to women than men because they they came at them under the guise of empowering them. But what they really did is is they cut them off at the knees. Yeah, I couldn't agree any more with that. this is ah This is a subject that's really close to my heart.
00:38:31
Speaker
um Women have absolutely been lied to. and it's it's It's so obvious when you get out of the the bullshit programming. right It's like saying, okay, we we have ah as a human species, we have two biological mandates that are just ingrained into every person in every species. I should say, not every person, every species. It's to survive and it's to procreate.
00:38:54
Speaker
This is it. like Those are the two fundamental things. Everything else outside of that is kind of a side quest. and so You're saying to me, when you listen to this feminist dribble, this feminist just shrill bullshit about how women have been so oppressed, children are a burden, home life is destroying them. it It's so obviously a lie because 85% of men when polled say they hate their jobs. They do that because they're showing up. They They're taking care of the people on their watch. Most guys don't like going to work. they don't They're not passionate about it. They're doing it because they're they're taking the higher road to provide for other people. That's what they're doing. You're telling me you're telling these women that the incredible, awesome, beautiful, you know iconic part of this life experience to procreate and bring children into this world and have these intense, beautiful, dynamic relationships, that you want to trade that for a W2 and a boss?
00:39:48
Speaker
for somebody that you have to answer to that's going to give you, you know, a bunch of work that you generally don't want to do so that you can buy things. You think your Gucci bag or your new model Tesla or whatever it is, your drive is going to make you feel special on Christmas when you're 50 and you have nobody around you that doesn't really care about you. You've got girlfriends that you can go drink wine with and, you know, bullish it with, but you think that's better than having a family around you. Like I'm i'm a business guy.
00:40:13
Speaker
I've been really successful in business. I'm really grateful for my career. I actually feel fortunate because I love what I do. I'm passionate about what I do, not the social media stuff. This is great too, but my actual business, what I do right now, I love it. I'm passionate about it and I feel like I have no limits. I couldn't ask for a better career for me.
00:40:30
Speaker
yeah If I take everything that I have done in my life, including my career and all the the notable achievements that I have in that and add it all together, it doesn't even come close to the value and the the fulfillment and the joy that I get out of being a father. It doesn't even come close.
00:40:46
Speaker
there's but There's not even a comparison. Like my children are my masterpieces. They are the greatest thing that I have ever done with my life. And I know that as a man, I can say that just as an empirical fact that this is true. This is where people find their greatest joy, their greatest fulfillment, their greatest happiness.
Parenthood vs. Career Success: Finding Fulfillment
00:41:02
Speaker
is in the family. It's in your own tribe that you get to create you get to create another human. You think like selling a business, which the vast majority of people will never do, selling the business for a multimillion-dollar exit, as cool as that sound, is is even close to creating another human?
00:41:19
Speaker
It's not even in the ballpark. It's not even the same universe. You know, it's awesome. I'm grateful for it. But it doesn't even come close. And yet this lie has been perpetuated for so long. And tragically, I think because women are emotional, they're very easily ah manipulated when you pull the emotional strings. You tell them they've been oppressed. You tell them they've been taken advantage of. There's still women in this society today, a lot of them that feel like society is keeping them down. And it's just because someone's telling them that they've got their head. They're saying it over and over again. And these women say it without any clue what they're talking about. They can't even tell you how they're oppressed. They will just say it because it's this perception that's been propagated by this intensely corrosive evil force. I can't think of anything worse for society than feminism. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm all for empowering women. The best people in this world that I personally know
00:42:05
Speaker
My favorite people in this world are my are women in my life. My mother is the best human being I know, and my wife is the best human being I know. So, I'm not taking anything away from that. I would do anything for her. If she wanted to work, she doesn't. Thank God. I want her to be stay home, but if she wanted to work, gave her fuma I would support that. I want a woman to do whatever she wants to do with her life.
00:42:23
Speaker
But that is not the same thing as the feminist movement, and they get convoluted as the two. So when you say you're talking, you know, feminism is bullshit, they take it as you're saying female is bullshit because it's become their identity because of these and emotional manipulations that this, ah yeah you know, that these this manufactured ah messaging has ingrained in their into their minds and hearts. so Yeah, female is wonderful. Femininity is wonderful. Feminism is bullshit. And that's that's the truth. And to um I think it's very important that men have people like you who articulately speak the truth.
00:43:06
Speaker
I know in this short conversation that we've had that everything you're saying is what you honestly in your heart believe to be correct and true. And that's what has what you say be so compelling. That's what has so many people be going, yeah, man, I wanna hear what what Adam has to say. I wanna listen to this man. That plus the fact that they know they're being lied to by everybody else, you know, out in society. And it's it's so important there's more voices like yours. you know I have a good friend of mine. He has ah a men's organization called The Order of Man, and he's got about 1,000, 1,100 men that are a part of it. and you know When he heard that I started my own ah
00:43:50
Speaker
Men's group, he was a little taken aback. He says, are you what, are you competing with me? I'll go competing with you, man. No, man, I'm uplifting you, brother. I told him, I want you to be 10 times, 100 times bigger than you are today. He said, you do? I said, look, think about it. If you had 10,000 men in your group, let's say there were 10,000 men like you that had 10,000 men that followed them. 10,000 times 10,000 is 100 million men.
00:44:18
Speaker
There are four and a quarter billion men on the planet. A hundred million men is a drop in the bucket, man. It's not even close to what we need. I need to create more guys like you. I need to empower more guys like Adam already. I need to give my energy, my heart, so we all together can get from the several thousand or tens of thousands of men that are getting this message today to several million, several hundred million, and then billions. That's when we're going to truly change the world, man.
00:44:52
Speaker
ah Well, I tell you, in that vein, um when i when I came into this space, i I felt like I was an island. I mean, I've got good business partners. I've got good guys around me. I've got an awesome tribe. It's something I've i've had for most of my life, except in my first marriage. I did largely give that up, but I learned a very valuable lesson for my first marriage. But for almost my entire life, I've had a good tribe of guys around me. Even so, I felt like I was the only one saying this kind of stuff.
00:45:17
Speaker
And I felt like I was an island. I was like, I got to say this. And I know it's going to be unpopular. And there's going to be a lot of pushback. And there has been a lot of pushback. There's been far more support for it. But there's been a lot of pushback to the messaging, which is which is the natural course of things. When you tell the truth, if it is the truth, it's going to offend people. It has to if it's the truth.
00:45:34
Speaker
But what I have found in this journey over the last year and a half is that there's so many guys like you, Nikki, other guys in this space that are speaking up and doing and saying the exact same thing. So many guys, I feel like the pendulum is swinging and we're at the vanguard of that. And it actually gives me so much encouragement to see other men like you, your buddies, other guys, I know start men's group that are saying the exact same thing. And there we're trying to wake men up. and Men are waking up. and To me, this is to your point like this isn't a competition. This is synergy. man this is saying like hey We're on the same page. There's more of us than we thought. There's an army of us that feel this way and think this way. and If we really like put our efforts into this and unite with each other and share this message, we have a chance to make some real change in this world. We have a chance to make the next generation a much better
00:46:22
Speaker
but group of human beings than this generation because of the messaging we're sharing. So I'm with you, man. I'm super encouraged by this. I love these conversations and these podcasts, and I love the way that you're articulating things because you're telling the truth, and I can tell it the same thing. What you're saying is what you authentically believe. And I want to say one more point on this.
00:46:39
Speaker
I think a lot of people miss this because we have been conditioned by society to be ah accept and accepting tolerant politically correct and so everybody goes around thinking that they got to be nice and nice is the absolute worst way to be because being nice in my opinion is being dishonest on some fundamental level.
The Quest for Authenticity in Men's Lives
00:46:58
Speaker
You're not saying what you really feel, you're not acting the way you really think you should act, you're trying to be nice so that nobody gets offended and so this is a reason why nice guys finish last because I heard this recently that the highest frequency a human can emit, the highest frequency is authenticity. When you are just authentic to who you are, it resonates. Now, people are going to be turned off. People are going to hate it. People hate the truth. But being authentic essentially means the same thing as being truthful. You are being who you are. You are being how you were designed to be. And everybody is an individual. everybody's going to have a different voice, a different perspective, a different paradigm, and I think that's actually a huge win. But you have to be authentic about it. If you trade your authenticity for anything else, acceptance, if you trade it to get a promotion at work, if you trade it to get that girl you know to to like you, as soon as you trade your your authenticity, you are literally
00:47:50
Speaker
putting yourself in a prison of your own making and guys get stuck in that place and they don't know how to get out of it and they know they're miserable and they know they're unhappy and they know that whatever is going on it isn't working for them but so much of this is because they're not waking up to the fact that they're not being who they were made to be.
00:48:07
Speaker
You're bang on. You know, Jordan Peterson said, a nice man is not a good man. A good man is a dangerous man who has it under voluntary control. I interviewed Robert Glover on the podcast a few months ago. He wrote the book No More Mr. Nice Guy, which has sold tens of millions of copies around the world. Amazing, man. You should you should listen to the episode. You know what? I'll dig it up for you. I'll send it to you. You should listen to the whole thing. You'll love it. Yeah, he's great.
00:48:31
Speaker
um
00:48:34
Speaker
Adam, I want to do more shit with you, bro. Likewise, brother. So let me tell you about three or four things I'm thinking of. So I write a lot of books. I've written 11, including this one I wrote with Donald Trump's friend that got Donald Trump's attention. um I've had it in my mind to write a book for men. Maybe you and I can collaborate and put a book like that out there together. you know i I'm i'm um' ah a mom um'm a guy who writes quickly. like i can I can produce a book in 60, 80, 90 days and have it out. So that's one thing.
00:49:06
Speaker
I'd love to do maybe an event with you. There's a buddy of mine who's getting a few of us together for a sweat lodge up here. I don't know if you ever want to fly up to Canada in the middle of winter, but a sweat lodge sounds like a pretty freaking cool thing to do, you know? I'd love to do all of the above, brother. All of it, man. I'm actually writing a book right now, but my bandwidth is so limited, right? It's just hard for me to get the time in. So I'm working through a book. I would love to to collaborate with you on ah on a project like that. Again, this is this is my passion right now. Is this kind of stuff? I'll tell you why that works. All the guys that I've co-written with have no time.
00:49:45
Speaker
and I'm the writer in the writing partnership. All we do is we talk, I get the ideas and I put it together and I and i and i shove it out and I get it done quickly. So this book, 300 plus pages,
00:49:59
Speaker
The vast majority was written by me. Now this took us six months to do because it's 300 plus pages. um This is a business book I wrote with one of my clients who's the top insurance guy for a particular line of insurance here in Canada. We put this together in 60 days, 140
Collaborating on Men's Issues: Books and Events
00:50:15
Speaker
pages. that was good All I did was I spoke to him for 30 minutes, three times a week. And I did all the writing and I got it over to him.
00:50:23
Speaker
So something to think about something to think about. I don't know how far down along your project you are. If you're well into it, then we probably shouldn't do it. But if you're just getting started. it's No, I mean, we could do ah we can do a different book. I've got this one that I've started into. This one's more of like personal memoir. So it'd be a may I might work, but it's more of me like sharing my stories and these life lessons. But as far as us coming together, I'm talking about a men's book. We could put a men's book together. Yeah, yeah. Okay, cool. Cool. That'd be good. Let's, let's talk about that. Um, yeah, the sweat lodge, man. Fuck. I'm excited to do that. I've done one before years and years ago. I'm excited. to It was a wild experience. I didn't do any of the ayahuasca and drug shit that the dudes did, but i I was still in the altered state at the end of the the time in the sweat lodge. And it's, uh, we've got this dude, he's like, uh, an authentic, uh, you know, indigenous type of individual.
00:51:14
Speaker
um He's got these these horses. So you do the sweat lodge. So it's like a whole weekend experience, right? You do the sweat lodge and then you go with these horses and these horses you like stand with them and they they emit this kind of healing spiritual energy to you. You know, it's it's wild.
00:51:33
Speaker
um And the the men fucking loved it. I did it with a dozen men last time we did it. Might do the same this time. But this is the sort of thing that I think is good. And I'm thinking, maybe what we do is I go find Robert Glover and a couple other high level dudes in this world. Maybe we do a panel on a podcast. What do you think of that? I'd love it, man. All of the above.
00:51:53
Speaker
And there's a buddy of mine, he's become a client of mine as well. He's got a ah pretty cool podcast. He talks about ah male-female attraction dynamics. ah The name of his show is Come On Man. ah The Come On Man podcast. Really good dude. ah He's out of Colorado. Love to connect to you with him. His name's Paul Barrow. I think you should go on his show.
00:52:13
Speaker
I would love it. we ah Me and my team have just launched a men's group as well called Doughboys. Doughboys is a spectrum in my mind I've always used on one end of this of masculinity, on one end of that spectrum, is the harmless Pillsbury Doughboy.
00:52:29
Speaker
on the other end of that spectrum are that you know the the hard infantry soldiers of World War I that were willing to lay down their lives for God and country in the worst of conditions that could ever be that this world could throw at them. and I've used that in my own head as a barometer. Am I being the Pillsbury Doughboy right now or am I being an infantry guy? so I've launched that as a ah way to um to do exactly what you're doing to try and really rally guys together into a tribe again and and and sit around. In our case, we're creating a show launching next week. We've done it over the summer where it is literally sitting around a campfire talking about masculine issues. We were filming it all summer. We're actually launching an indoor studio show because it's freaking winter right now and it's not great for equipment to be outside, but it has a fire in the middle of it and we're doing the exact same thing. So I would love to have you on that show for sure. We'd launch it next month. I'll let you know more details as we're I don't know exactly what day because we're putting together the studio and everything else But I would love to have you on that show and anybody else any of these other guys that are working in this masculine space we got come on show Paul is a rock star guest. He's a rocks and he's a rock star host and he's a rock star guest. He's amazing You should have him on your show. I'm gonna introduce you to Larry Hagner Ryan Mikler and a few other dudes um You know this ah idea of a show around the fire I'm digging it um
00:53:44
Speaker
I'll fly up to Utah in the summer if you're going to do that again. And I'm going to do that here in in Canada as well. ah Maybe you want to come and ah' fly. I'll make it happen. Okay, fuck it, this is good. So um tell me about the name of your program and your website and all that so we can let the folks know. Yep, Adam artificial is where I just do my content, what's coming from my heart, what I think is is helpful. um Everybody can judge for themselves. I feel like it's helpful for them, but that's my my ah my social media handle. I don't have a name for the show that we're launching next week or next month. We're working on that. But the ah men's group that we have is the Doboy Nation. You can look it up. It's DGHBOY, but Doughboy is the name of it. and we've got We've already got it. We just launched it last week and we've had members signing up already. and We've got a large group. and It's actually basically an extension of another group that I've been doing where I've got hundreds of members in it, which are basically my guys that are my sales reps. I teach them on all this kind of stuff, masculinity issues. I teach them on technical. It's more technical training sales stuff as well included in it. but This launch of Doughboy is basically an extension of that group just made for a general audience of men
00:54:52
Speaker
Okay, great. We're gonna make sure we put all that in the show notes. Adam, we're gonna talk offline. We'll get a few of these things going. God bless you, man. Thank you for the work that you do, and thanks for being such a powerfully real, authentic voice. Like, this was great. God bless you, brother. Likewise, brother. This is one of the favorite shows, my favorite shows I've ever done, man. I love your energy. I love the way you articulate things. This is fun. This is synergistic. So likewise, and God bless, brother. Thank you. Thank you.
00:55:22
Speaker
Thank you for listening to The Sovereign Man podcast. If you're ready to take charge of your life and become the man you've always wanted to be, we invite you to join the movement at sovereignman.ca.