Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
A Journey to Living Life on YOUR Terms with Kristen
44 Plays10 months ago
SUMMARY
On this episode of Dirty Money with Bevin and Mike, our guest is Kristen, the show notes fairy of this very podcast. She is a taxy-lady, accountability coach, and artist. Like many freelancers, Kristen has worn many hats to make a living. After living in Brooklyn, New York, for seven years, she recently moved to the house across the street from her childhood home and moved back to Ohio. She’s here to talk today about how trusting yourself and God (or the universe) can lead you to incredible opportunities and help people understand there is more than one way to live.
TOPICS
[1:35] Who is Kristen
[5:25] The Journey to this Mindset
[8:22] Buying a Home
[12:20] The loan process
[20:22] - Lessons from buying a home unexpectedly
[24:55] Leading with Faith
[30:05] Making the asks and taking the leap
[48:35] Plans for the new Home
RESOURCES & LINKS
Connect with Kristen
Instagram: @kristen.maryam
Connect with Kristen
Instagram: @kristen.maryam
Other Resources Mentioned:
Guys we Fucked: The Anti-Slut Shaming Podcast
CONTACT INFO
Bevin Morgan:
Instagram: @bevinmorgan & @temple_eanna
Website: www.templeeanna.com & BevinMorgan.com
Mike Poulin:
Instagram: @mjpou56
Dirty Money Podcast:
Instagram: @dirtymoney_podcast
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Purpose of Dirty Money
00:00:10
Speaker
Welcome to Dirty Money with Bevin. And Mike. A space to talk about financial topics for folks who don't fit into traditional financial spaces. We believe money is a tool for everyone. Our mission is to provide a literal microphone and platform for queer, BIPOC, polyamorous, and sex-positive individuals. No topic is off the table here.
00:00:31
Speaker
That being said, one tiny little housekeeping note. For those listening who may have others with sensitive ears, the listener discretion is advised because we do not censor ourselves. That's right. You've been warned, but enough from us. Let's get this episode started. Hey, welcome to Dirty Money with Bevin and Mike. I am Bevin. And I am Mike.
Meet Kristen: The Backbone of the Podcast
00:01:01
Speaker
And today we have Kristen with us, which is so special because Kristen is like our behind the scenes magic maker. Like she is really the reason that this podcast can happen and exist. And she's dope and y'all are going to love her.
00:01:22
Speaker
And so I'm going to dive in. Kristen, will you please just tell us a little bit about who you are? What do you do? What is your life about? Just give us the intro.
00:01:32
Speaker
Well, first, hi. Thank you for having me on your show. I'm so excited. It's truly an honor. I just I love the show. I loved the idea as soon as I heard you guys were doing the green light and given it a go. And I've just been it's been a blessing to be part of the process. And so thank you for that. Thank you.
00:01:53
Speaker
Yeah, my name's Kristin. I call myself a taxi lady, an accountability coach, and an artist. I wear a lot of hats, as many creative people do, to pay the bills. You have to wear a lot of hats, do a lot of things. So my day job is in taxes, but we help artists and freelancers. Folks who make untraditional income is what we say. Anybody who makes untaxed income is who we focus on. So it's cool because I get to use my art background, my focus in that, and get to help other artists.
00:02:22
Speaker
And then on the side, I coach people. I'm an accountability coach and have a ceramics practice as well. So I do a little bit of everything, a little bit of show notes writing, a little bit of work for whoever will pay me, basically, to keep it moving and grooving over here. So that's the quick little bit about me. That is so great. And where are you, for our listeners, where are you located?
Kristen's Personal Journey and Move to Ohio
00:02:46
Speaker
So right now I'm in Northeast Ohio, but I just moved as of this week. This is brand new location, brand new house. Coming to you live. Coming to you live from Northeast Ohio. This is where I was born. This is where I grew up. I'm in a house across the street from the one I grew up in, which is amazing. But I spent the last seven years in Brooklyn, New York. So I just made the move here officially. And yeah, but been around. Been around a few places.
00:03:16
Speaker
So seven years in New York, hustler spirit like fully baked in at this point. And you mentioned a few things that I think are super cool. So first of all, I had no idea that you did ceramics. I want to know more, I'm curious. And then the other thing that you mentioned is your accountability coaching and your full-time tax lady. So just of those things, which one is like your heart? Where does your passion lie the most?
00:03:46
Speaker
That's such a good question. And I would say with the accountability coaching, and why I say that is because when I work with my clients with accountability coaching, these are folks who are really driven, who have a lot of goals, have a lot of ideas, people who are really good at school, I say, but when they're on their own as entrepreneurs, when they don't have a boss, when they don't have a list of tasks to just finish, they struggle to get stuff done.
00:04:10
Speaker
because I am that person. And that's what I struggle with. And so if I have someone checking in on me every other week on the tasks I said I was going to do, it's like having the homework. And so that's what I do for clients. So I just work with folks in all kinds of creative industries, you know, depending on what they want to do, I help them figure out what they want to do, number one, because sometimes people that's, that's the first step, we think we want to go one way, but we actually want to do something else. So I help people figure out
00:04:34
Speaker
what exactly is they want to do and what they have to help them get there. And then we spend anywhere between three to six months working together to kind of get them on the right path to make that happen. Well, and I know one of the things that you mentioned in our kind of like pre conversation was that really what you do is help people sort of envision their future. And you said, I'm going to paraphrase this.
00:05:02
Speaker
But basically you want to help people understand or like know that there's more than one way to live, right? Like that you can kind of really do whatever you want to. It's all made up. So do you have like a story or an experience or even your own journey of how you figured that philosophy out?
Financial Health and Home Buying Experience
00:05:21
Speaker
Yes. I would say getting financially healthy is really what opened the door for me. And you both know because you know how the process works. I was a client at the financial gym. So the first financially naked session I had in person was the first time I had ever looked at my net worth as a whole. Right?
00:05:37
Speaker
I knew I had debt, student loans, credit cards. I was like, if I could pay my rent every month, the rest will just work out, hopefully. It's fine. It's fine. If the landlord's paid, if the minimums are paid, we're floating. And you can float. You can do that for a long time and be okay.
00:05:54
Speaker
you know, not be great, not be thriving, but be okay. So I had never looked at my net worth. I was just too anxious. I was a freelancer, didn't know what my expenses were, didn't know how much I was actually making. And so just sitting down with somebody and saying all that out loud the first time really changed it for me. And then
00:06:10
Speaker
Once you get the plan and realize as a freelancer, you can actually just figure out how much money you need to live and reverse engineer it. So I'm over here thinking I need to make hundreds of thousands of dollars. I need to do this, that and the other. And then my trainer was like, girl, you need $2,000 a month to live. And like, how can you make that?
00:06:30
Speaker
That's a lot of mugs. That's a few expensive things. That's as many hours. Then you have options. So once you just realize that it's all math, it's crappy math. It's shitty math. Capitalism sucks, but it is just a math problem. Once you can detach your emotions from the math problem and think about, oh, how do I solve the math problem the easiest way possible, you open up the possibilities to do whatever else you want. So that's what changed it for me, was just realizing it was all math.
00:07:00
Speaker
So what was like the first next thing that you did once you were like, okay, two grand a month. What's next? I just started reverse engineering how I could make that money because I had a few different kinds of jobs. I had hourly jobs. I was selling ceramics, doing kinds of things. So I was just trying to figure out how I could make that money. And then once you hit that baseline, where does that money go from there? How can we reach the goals faster? What goals need to happen?
00:07:26
Speaker
but you know everything is always just moving and changing as a freelancer so it was hard to always just stay on track so I just kind of stayed floating with the credit card debt and working going up and down and up and down it really just kept on doing that for a long time so you know it's a long journey and it's a long process so I don't exactly know you know what that next step was because I'm still there I'm still there and I'm still working on it this move was that you know next big step to to make those numbers number
00:07:54
Speaker
a lot faster than they were when I was living in New York. Well, I was just going to say that's a that is a very interesting move New York to back to Ohio. So that kind of segues very well into the why behind that.
00:08:19
Speaker
It's a fun story, and I haven't had a chance to tell, and I'm excited to tell you all. I kind of told Mike a little bit about it, but basically, I try to call my parents every week, but sometimes things get busy, things are hectic, and my lease in New York was up in January. So I was just praying for affordable housing, praying for affordable housing. I didn't want to live with roommates anymore. I was just
00:08:42
Speaker
hoping. And I hadn't called my dad in a few weeks, so my mom texted me and she said, Hey, dad misses you. Like, just give him a call. And I was like, Okay, like, I'll call my I think I don't know why I hadn't called. I don't know if it was just like, the news was busy work was whatever it was tax season. So I gave him a call and we got to chat and he was telling me that the house across the street from him was for sale again.
00:09:04
Speaker
And so I was on Zillow and I was like, I don't know dad, it says it sold last month on Zillow. And he said, well, I'm looking at a sign that says it's for sale right now with the phone number. And I said, okay, well, grab that home phone, dial up the number. Let's see what's going on with the house. So he did put it on speaker phone. So I'm on the phone with my dad. He's on the phone with the seller and the seller is telling us a little bit about like his deal, whatever. And then basically he's like, yeah, I'll sell you the house for 70 K.
00:09:34
Speaker
And I was like, excuse me, what? You're like, wait a minute, I need some pause. Wait, what year is this? Right. We're recording this on December 29th, 2023. And you're in this house currently. There is plumbing, electricity, walls, windows.
00:09:59
Speaker
Okay, so let's dive into that. Okay, this story just keeps getting more and more interesting as we go back to players. It's juicy. It's juicy. So it's across the street from where I grew up. So my parents have lived in the same house since the early 90s. They bought their house for slightly less than 40k when they bought it. It's a three bedroom, one bathroom house.
00:10:20
Speaker
So that's their house. And so he calls, you know, my dad calls the seller basically, he bought it for 35,000, but it was in really bad shape because it had a series of just renters who didn't treat the house as well, you know.
00:10:33
Speaker
you know, story of renters. Sometimes that happens, unfortunately. So the house was in really bad shape. And this, this gentleman who bought it, he's a realtor, but he also sells and flips houses. So what he does is he buys houses and then he does a lot of work on his own. He flips them mid flip, he puts a little sign in the art that says for sale.
00:10:51
Speaker
So basically, when it's the stuff that DIYers could do, when it's the painting, the floors, he puts it up, keeps on working on the house. If somebody buys the house, great. If somebody doesn't buy the house, he finishes it, sells at full price. So we just happened to catch him when he was on the phone and was like, yeah, 70K. Because I bought it for 35, I put this much work in, this is what I'm selling it for.
00:11:15
Speaker
Yeah. He had four other houses. It's getting cold in Ohio now. So utilities start to hurt around this time of year. So he was like, listen, you want the house? Like, you know, and, and, you know, my dad loves to work outside, loves to take care of his lawn. So he had seen my dad and so he was excited. He's like, Oh yeah, that guy takes good care of his house.
00:11:36
Speaker
He was just like, he made a good connection with my dad. They became good friends. So it became a very personal connection, which is good because the loan process ended up being a nightmare and a half. But the actual house, 70K, were on the phone. My dad's telling me that. And I'm like, am I moving to Ohio? Because the down payment on that is less than a security deposit and first months in the apartments I was looking at in New York.
00:12:00
Speaker
And I was looking at apartments in Staten Island. So when you're looking at apartments in Staten Island, you might as well just move to Ohio. Because like, what are we doing at that point?
Overcoming Loan Challenges
00:12:10
Speaker
Like, it's Yeah, so take us through that, that loan process. Like, what is like,
00:12:21
Speaker
I'll try to be as kind as possible. So I was talking to my dad, and I was like, OK, cool. We told the guy, he said, my daughter's pretty interested. So we'll talk. We'll let you know. Because I wanted to make sure I could get pre-qualified. I still need a down payment. Like, I didn't have down payment money, basically, because I had spent the whole year paying off my credit card. Santa 2023, I was going to be credit card debt three. That was the big goal. I was on track. I was like 200 bucks away, right?
00:12:47
Speaker
in October, the end of October when this all started. So yeah, we, I get in touch with an Islamic lender because I'm Muslim and there are certain rules about your interest and what you can and can't do. It's my first big purchase. So I look up a bunch of different options. I go for the longest one that's been in business, the highest rated. I get in touch. I get pre-qualified in four seconds. They're like, you know, three, 3% down, whatever you need. So my dad said, you know, if you're serious about buying the house, I can help you.
00:13:16
Speaker
So he was offering to give me some down payment money. I was like, great, I'm just not going to pay rent while we're doing this and figure that all out later to kind of stash up on some cash to to make the closing work. So we really just were like, OK, we're going to make it happen. So I got pre qualified. Everything was going really easy breezy.
00:13:34
Speaker
Yeah, but then it all kind of, it went downhill from there. We got an inspection. Inspection was great. You know, nothing too bad in the inspection. That's what you want. The house is built in 1904. This is an old house. It's like a lot to be, you know, a lot of love that still needs done. Like the guy was fixing it up. He stopped halfway through. He stopped to work. As soon as he went to contract, he packed up. Started working on the other houses. So,
00:14:01
Speaker
got pre-qualified, all that stuff. Inspection was great, and then we have to pay for the appraiser, right? So the appraiser comes through. I'm buying the house for $70, appraiser appraises it at $85K as is.
00:14:15
Speaker
Okay. Seems like that should be no problem, right? Cause I'm buying it for 70 and the appraiser says it's worth 85 K as is, as like half a construction zone, not painted, no good floors, that kind of thing. Not working bathroom in the basement, you know, all that kind of stuff. But then the lone people come back and they say, I have to paint the walls. I have to buy a dishwasher. I have to buy a fridge and I have to buy an oven because the house is currently not livable. Hmm.
00:14:41
Speaker
And I was like, what? How does paint make a house livable?
00:14:47
Speaker
Thank you. Thank you. OK. So this is right around Thanksgiving time. So we started in October. You know, things are taking the usual amount of time going back and forth. You know, got to send documents, got to get letters, yada, yada, yada. So all that's going smooth. No problem. There is one of the appraiser comes in. And then the loan company, the officer was telling me, well, the appraiser says you have to do this. And I was like, well, the appraiser is not saying anything because he just says how much the house is worth.
00:15:15
Speaker
You guys are the ones that are saying things. Oh, Mike's pausing. I was about to say that I had a similar situation with a VA appraiser who appraised it like it was an inspection.
00:15:30
Speaker
And I was like, no, no, no, you're not an inspector. Stay in your lane. I had to fight. It was back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, my lender. And I'm like, look, my inspector just reread his inspection and is saying that what she's saying is a load of crap because that's not her job. She's just supposed to appraise the house. And yeah, it was wild because she was saying things like,
00:16:01
Speaker
the kitchen, which was renovated in 2003, by code, there's permits that were pulled, the kitchen needed a vent above the stove. And I'm like, I'm about to rip out this kitchen, so I'm not spending money to, I'm like, you are not an inspector, you are an appraiser, so stay in your lane. So I feel you on that because I had very similar situation.
00:16:31
Speaker
It was it was just so silly because the painting thing. OK, like, sure, maybe you could argue the stove, the fridge, whatever. Again, my parents live across the street, so I'm thinking I'm just going to, you know, be very frugal and eat in their kitchen until I have the money to get things set up. The whole kitchen is getting ripped out. All this stuff is getting taken care of once I own the house.
00:16:49
Speaker
But again, it's only 70K and the seller could sell this to anybody in cash. So he's not going to make these improvements. He's not going to do this stuff. So I'm responsible. And again, the seller is so cool. He's like, you can do whatever you want. He's like, I'll give your dad the keys. You can paint it. You can do. And he said in his 22 years of selling houses, this was the strangest experience he's ever had.
00:17:09
Speaker
which is because I felt like I was being gaslit because I'm like, okay. So I fly down here on Thanksgiving Day. My partner buys me a plane ticket so I can fly here one way and I'm like, okay, I'll stay till we close. And then I didn't even stay till we close. So I started painting the house. We get the fridge, we get the stove, the oven, and get the appraiser back. And they are arguing with me about a dishwasher. And I was like,
00:17:33
Speaker
You don't need a dishwasher for the house to be livable, okay? My parents, who live across the street, still don't have a dishwasher to this day, and there were seven of us in the house, plus all of our friends, and we were fine, and I am one lady with two cats.
00:17:47
Speaker
Like, I don't need a dishwasher. And I was really fighting them on this because, again, it's like not that I'm not going to buy one, but I'm going to redo the kitchen. I don't want to pick one right now. I don't want to spend the money because I'm trying to close and pay my rent in New York and do all of these things. So eventually I get an appraiser report back. They decided, oh, the paint wasn't actually necessary after I already had flown here and painted the whole house.
00:18:08
Speaker
My background's in theater painting, so I was able to paint it real quick. It literally took me a weekend. I painted the whole house on a weekend. But then they were like, they were like, oh, just kidding. That didn't need to happen. I feel like there are so many valuable lessons in this story. I wish you had texted me when that happened, because I would have been like, I would have been like, no, no, no. What? No. We're fighting this. We're going straight to the top.
00:18:39
Speaker
My the the loan officer was like, oh, I'll let management know they handled this poorly. I was like, yeah, please let management. I was like, I'm going to let everybody know after as soon as this is closed and funded, I'm going to let everybody know. Oh, did you get the fun little survey that they send after you close asking for your experience?
00:18:57
Speaker
Oh, yeah, I sure did. And I sure gave them my mind because, you know, fast forward to what we finally actually close. I'm back in New York. So we had to do mobile closing. I had to get a notary to my house to like notarize a bunch of documents overnight them FedEx. Yeah. Yeah. So I had to UPS them in a storm in New York. It's a flood warning. I'm like running to UPS to overnight these documents. The loan officer didn't even call me on the day of closing, didn't text me to check in and say, how's it going? How's the signing? Like literally nothing.
00:19:26
Speaker
the day we closed. I was like, wow, the seller called me to congratulate me like so many other people, people I don't even really know, like the title company is calling me to congratulate me. And like, you know, this kind of thing. They're like, okay, I see the tracking, you know, you're all good, whatever. The guy calls me four o'clock the next day.
00:19:45
Speaker
And I was like, thanks. Don't ever talk to me. I was like, are we done? Are you guys done? It's funded versus we're good here. He's like, yeah, I was like, great. I was like, don't ever talk to me again. Goodbye. Bye Felicia. Here's my thing though. Like that sounds ridiculous and I'm glad that you're done. Congratulations. Yay. And also like,
00:20:14
Speaker
Here's what I've learned. One, tell that appraiser to stay in their freaking lane. Like basically like don't just trust everybody in the process is what I think I've learned. And so that's one thing, right? Like hold people accountable to what they're supposed to do. But then two, like sometimes take a chance,
Taking Chances and Trusting Opportunities
00:20:36
Speaker
I think. I mean, you moved from New York City
00:20:40
Speaker
to your hometown, which I feel like already is like a huge emotional thing and it's like logistically a big thing to do. You took a chance on yourself and you're like, you know what, financially I'm looking at renting at these ridiculous prices. We all know what rent is doing these days versus this amazing home buying opportunity that like is straight from 1964. So
00:21:09
Speaker
like take a leap sometimes, right? Like when life gives you opportunities.
00:21:18
Speaker
take them? I was telling my friends and everybody said I was praying for affordable housing, but I wasn't specific enough with my asks. I didn't say I want affordable housing in New York, in best, I've been living on for five years. Like I was just praying. And then all of a sudden a house came to me for 70 K across the street from my parents. It was literally a gift from God, Alhamdulillah.
00:21:41
Speaker
I believe that because it's like divine timing. Like I hadn't called my dad in a long time. There was a sign in the yard. The guy was nice. Like my dad was patient, even though it took us almost two months to close. And anybody with 70 K cash could have just taken the house and he could have, you know, he could have screwed me and like, but he didn't, you know, he's a good guy. And I was just really blessed because that's not always the case with sellers. Like, especially at the end of the year, people are trying to close, you know, and like, especially flipping, flipping realtor.
00:22:14
Speaker
I also just wanted one last tidbit of advice that I would suggest if anyone is going through a similar home buying experience. As you said, Bevin, don't trust everyone knows how to do their job. People have bad days, right?
00:22:35
Speaker
And also, if you feel like something doesn't add up, sometimes it's worth getting a second opinion. So, for instance, if you have an appraisal that comes back in either A, you think it's incorrect, or B, they do things like tell you that you need to paint the walls, you can go out on your own and get an appraisal.
00:22:58
Speaker
So if it's, especially depending on what they say, it might be cost effective and time effective for you to get another professional in there. You can also, like my example, I took my appraisal and I sent it to my inspector. My inspector did his inspection before the appraisal, which I believe is usually the case.
00:23:22
Speaker
They gotta make sure everything anyway, uh, so you can always Leverage your spot and where you are as the homeowner and the other thing I always tell people I know we try not to be a financial advice podcast but uh always know that Until you sign the paperwork you can always walk away with a home if it doesn't feel right Don't force it
00:23:50
Speaker
the correct house and the correct time will come as Kristen is. A true testament to that, but don't, you know, I think a lot of people during COVID were so just wanting to buy a house that they just didn't listen to themselves or
00:24:14
Speaker
didn't kind of take what was going on and ensure that that was the correct thing. So always take your time. And if it doesn't feel right, you can always back out until you've signed the paperwork. So don't forget that. Yeah, I love that advice. Because you're right. It's like you'd much rather lose two grand in earnest money in an appraisal than be all in on a $70,000 purchase, right? Or something much more expensive. Or something much more expensive. It's nothing.
00:24:45
Speaker
Yeah. Well, so Kristen, your story is amazing. And one of the things that I am starting to really admire about you is the fact that you truly do live from a place of faith, it feels like. And I say that not in the like, I am a religious person who, you know, does like, yes, you do have a religion that is important to you.
00:25:12
Speaker
But I feel like you've got this faith in yourself and in things kind of happening the way they are meant to happen and being placed where you're meant to be placed and really kind of just listening and being present and taking that next step. And I would love to just talk more about that because I feel like it's such a brave and hopefully fulfilling way to live your life.
00:25:40
Speaker
Yeah, it is a very fulfilling way to live life. And I am a religious person, but I'm newly, not newly religious, I guess, but I officially converted to Islam or reverted to Islam this year in 2023. But growing up, I was an evangelical Christian. So I've always been around God and faith. And then I broke away from that late high school going into college. So I broke away from the church, but I was always spiritual.
00:26:05
Speaker
whether that was tarot cards, the universe, Buddhism, I was just exploring being open because I always knew that there was something bigger than me. And if I didn't understand what it was, that was OK, because there was time to figure it out. So I was just always exploring and always exploring and eventually ended up with Islam, which is amazing. But before then, you know, I did always trust the universe and did always trust that things would work out for me because they kind of always have like I have always just had like the faith that
00:26:34
Speaker
you know, if you work hard, you know, I always know I can make money. I've got the skills. I know I can work hard. I can always make it work if I need to make it work. So just always being open, being kind, being just like, you know, flexible to the opportunities has always been how I've guided my life.
Kristen's Spiritual Journey and Conversion to Islam
00:26:51
Speaker
That's how I moved to New York. Like I moved to New York because I was scrolling through Facebook and a friend that I had worked with in West Virginia years ago was going on tour and subleasing his apartment.
00:27:01
Speaker
and had put like, you know, asking for like sixteen hundred dollars or something. And I messaged him and said, how's nine hundred thinking he was going to negotiate. He said, sure. And I was like, great. So I moved to New York with two suitcases and then just didn't leave, you know. And then all my stuff came with me after that. I was just testing it out. So I've always just like had the faith that if I work hard, same thing with the housing in New York, like my apartments, I found a great landlord, ended up in great land. But at the beginning was really great. Stayed with them the entire time I was there. Like I've always just had
00:27:31
Speaker
good fortune, putting good into the universe and having good always come back to me. And that's what was beautiful about fighting Islam was that I finally had a, you know, I finally figured out what it was. Like God was always there guiding me.
00:27:46
Speaker
Even if I didn't have the words for it, I just always had that trust and faith, which is beautiful because that's part of what Islam teaches. Like there's that fitra and it's always there inside you. And then you can come to identify it when you're ready. And I did when I was ready. Um, but it is a very fulfilling place to live, but you don't have to be religious. Like I said, I wasn't for years. This is new officially new, you know, but before then I just always let, you know, God, the universe, whoever that is, whatever that is for you, just trusting guide and
00:28:15
Speaker
That's how I've always been. It's a little woo-woo, but it works. It makes me happy. Bring the woo-woo. That's what we do here. I'm here for that. Yeah. And then trusting yourself to the self-confidence. I credit a lot of my self-confidence because I started listening to guys. We fucked the anti slut shaping podcast back when it first started.
00:28:34
Speaker
I don't know, over a decade ago at this point. And those two women started the podcast when they were in their early 20s and in New York. And so I feel like they raised me basically, and the host current and I got to meet both of these women in New York, because I lived there for so long, Corinne ended up hiring me to like paint some furniture in her house. So like, I really feel like they always, they just have taught young women and
00:28:55
Speaker
all people really, but especially young women, how to be self-confident, how to take no shit, how to just always be thoughtful and question yourself. So I get, I feel like my self-confidence and don't give a fuck attitude comes from listening to that podcast for so long. Like it's one of the only shows I've been listening to consistently every single Friday for the entire decade. It's been in existence because those two women are just, they're just, you know, they're great. And I've always learned a lot. So, you know, God and podcasts,
00:29:24
Speaker
All right, put that on a t-shirt. I need that cock-a-mug. That's so great. God of podcasts. That's all you need. Our new merch is about to drop, so. 2024, we have a lookout. The podcast is how I found the financial gym too, and that's how I became financially healthy. I've always just pulled on the thread. You find a thread if you just pull on it and just pull on it a little bit. You never know what's going to happen. Just keep on pulling, keep on pulling.
00:29:54
Speaker
Also asking for a friend who is me. I'm the friend. I'm the friend. Can we get a little more like deep divey insight into your like
00:30:09
Speaker
not giving a fuck, like just asking, like making the ask. I feel like for me, that's something that's been so hard. And I just heard in that short story that you told, you're like, yeah, I've got these painting skills and I got hired to do this painting job. I saw this opportunity online and I was like, interesting. $900, dude's like, you know, so just like having the freaking cajones, I guess, to be like, let's see what happens. Like tell me how to do that. And then maybe somebody else will learn as well.
00:30:39
Speaker
Well, I would like to say number one is probably like just the privilege of it all. Like, you know, I am just like a white lady so I can up and move to most parts of the country and feel fine and safe. Like I worked in Utah and I worked in New York and I'm in Ohio. Like, you know, I recognize that that's not the reality for everybody to just come to a more conservative part of a town that isn't necessarily the best place. So that's number one. So I'll acknowledge that that is huge. You know, just the way I look and the way I talk is it makes me safer.
00:31:07
Speaker
in this country, not the safest, but I do have a question real quick. I know I want to I want to I want to bring up a good point about privilege, but also you are now in a pretty I would say Christian area. You are no longer Christian and you I'm sure are out and proud.
00:31:33
Speaker
of who you are and what you practice, correct? Well, and for those who are listening and not watching, Chris and Bez wear full hijab. If you see her, you'll be like, oh, that is a Muslim lady. Right. How has, I know Ohio is new full time. How have you been feeling?
00:32:00
Speaker
with the move with that. Has there been any challenges with kind of bigotry, for lack of better words?
00:32:12
Speaker
That's a good question. And Alhamdulillah, praise be to God. My life has been nothing but better since I started wearing hijab. Like in Brooklyn, more people started talking with me. People say salaam on the streets. Like people give me dates and treats and food. And so in Brooklyn, it was nothing but a blessing. Like nobody ever gave me a hard time.
00:32:31
Speaker
And then moving to Ohio, I haven't been here a lot, but I also just see a lot less people. You know what I mean? And I still, again, there is a privilege in looking the way I do, like being as white and as Midwestern as I sound. Like some people, that sounds so bad, but I think some people aren't actually sure if I'm Muslim or not. Like they think that I'm appropriating somebody else's culture before they think that I converted to a whole new religion. Not everybody, but there is a bit of that there. The people will ask me like, are you Muslim?
00:33:01
Speaker
I think it's pretty obvious, but it might not be. And there are other, you know, there are Christian women who, if you're ever on that side of TikTok, there's a whole side of TikTok that it's Christian, hijabi style women. So it's not just Muslim women. So I think some people are confused by me. And I always just leave like when people are looking at me with this, if I make eye contact with someone, I just smile, you know, ask how they're doing. Just try to use all the skills I learned in Brooklyn being a good neighbor.
Living in Ohio: Experiences and Community
00:33:27
Speaker
Just be extra friendly to people.
00:33:29
Speaker
And thankfully, my brother and dad drive me around because I hate driving. So I'm not just moving out and about around alone, which is also nice and safe. But again, I do have the privilege of being white because somebody who is black in a headscarf gets a different treatment than me or someone who is brown. So again, even though I am in a headscarf, I'm still at the end of the day if I wear a beanie.
00:33:53
Speaker
I could just look like somebody who's cold. It's not, I'm not as visibly Muslim as some other people are. Um, so again, just acknowledging the privilege and know my life has been nothing but a blessing, which is maybe not an interesting story, but is the reality. And I feel, I feel very thankful for that, which again, I feel like I'm safe, like, you know, like Allah is watching, you know, making sure that we're okay.
00:34:16
Speaker
Well and you know one thing that I love about that story and just about your sentiment is so you know as a black woman in America I have plenty of opportunities to feel unsafe, othered, judged, all of these things. And the truth is I'd live, I personally live my life in a way where I just don't feel those things. Like I
00:34:47
Speaker
have practiced this for so long that it's not really a conscious effort at this point. But I spend 90% of my time just choosing to believe that good things are going to happen for me. And so similar experience, like when I am in the world,
00:35:04
Speaker
I make eye contact with people. I smile at people. I think I get more than probably my average fair share of people holding doors for me and things like that. And I just accept that. And I feel like all of us have an opportunity to at least start practicing expecting the best.
00:35:25
Speaker
And it might not be your reality every single day, all of the time, and especially at first, but I truly do think, and this is something that I got from my mom, because she's a black woman who grew up in the 50s and 60s, but still, she just has this expectation that things are going to go right and well for her in her life, and they do. And so she just puts out this super positive vibe all the time, and people eat that shit up.
00:35:55
Speaker
And I really do think the more that you practice being in that space, the more the world, the universe will kind of reflect it back to you. I truly believe that. I agree. All right. Well, there you go. Lesson for the day.
00:36:11
Speaker
And we can just get back onto your journey of not giving a fuck. I just wanted to touch with kind of what your change in location, I was kind of curious about that. But yes, going back to not giving a fuck.
00:36:33
Speaker
I would say, you know, I have anxiety. So my brain's always like, what's the worst possible thing that can happen? And if you think about something like if I moved to New York in this apartment for two months and I hate it, what's the worst possible thing that can happen? I could find somewhere else to live. You know, I don't have kids.
00:36:48
Speaker
to worry about. I didn't have pets at the time. When I was in my early 20s, 23, 24, you could pack everything up in two suitcases and just go anywhere. Same thing when I'm moving back here. If I buy a house and I end up hating it, it's a good investment as long as you hold it long enough. It's a 70K house. It's not going to be a bad investment. The inspection came back fine.
00:37:09
Speaker
what's the worst thing that can happen? I'm the right next door to my parents. There's really not the worst thing that can happen. And then once you learn that every financial mistake is fixable, that just amplifies it. Because then you're like, well, what's the worst thing that can happen is I take out a personal loan and then we'll deal with it later. As long as you have that healthy intention and don't use that to be irresponsible or financially unhealthy, once you learn
00:37:31
Speaker
that you can only mess up your life so much, and it's the emotions that are attached to it that actually make you feel a lot bigger. For me, I had to buy the fridge and the oven, which I couldn't do in cash because they were checking my cash for the closing costs. I had just paid off all my credit card debt. And I was like, do I really want to? And I was like, yeah, because it's fine. Because in January, I'm going to be paying
00:37:56
Speaker
$500 for my mortgage instead of my rent. I paid it off so I could have that clean slate so I could do this thing. Everything is fixable. So it's just practicing that confidence. And the more you practice it, the easier it gets to just say yes. And then the more things that you have, the more connections. Once you're married, you have kids, you have pets, it's a little harder. It just becomes more challenging. So I tell people, if you want to try something, do it when you're young and don't have a lot of stuff.
Post-Purchase Financial Strategies
00:38:25
Speaker
Well, and it's funny you mentioned about the everything financials fixable. The other really awesome thing that I'm sure you're already thinking about is your appraisal already came back higher than your mortgage. And so you are walking into quite a bit of equity and you potentially, especially once you finish the work that needs to be done.
00:38:47
Speaker
you can always get it reappraised and you can always roll that credit card debt into a home equity loan on a much lower interest rate because now you own the home, you're not renting. So there's just so many doors that open and there's so many options and things. And that's what I think sometimes people get so overwhelmed with. They're like, I don't know which one's the right one to do. And it's like, pick one. And if it doesn't work, try something else. There's always
00:39:17
Speaker
There's always bankruptcy. And I don't mean to joke, because it is a very serious thing. But it is, at the end of the day, what I always tell people is bankruptcy is consumer protection. So if you go into this, you're trying to do this thing, and it fails miserably,
00:39:43
Speaker
There are options, like you're not stuck. I think the only thing that pretty much can't get wiped out from bankruptcy as of right now is federal student loans. And thanks, Senator Joe Biden in 2005. So that's a whole other episode of a podcast for a different time.
00:40:08
Speaker
But yes, so for our listeners, just remember if large financial decisions sound scary, but it sounds like it's what you wanna do, go for it. But also don't come back and tell me I told you to do it. I agree. You are an adult, you are consenting to it, you are deciding to do it on your own. I'm just reminding you that get out of your own head.
00:40:36
Speaker
I also work with a financial trainer who checks in with me so nothing can go to bananas without somebody peeking in and being like, Hey, wait a minute. Those numbers aren't going the way they're supposed to be going. So I feel really confident because I have a team built in to help me as long as you don't ghost them.
00:40:54
Speaker
Right. Yeah. You still have to make the appointment. Yeah, that's true. But I feel guilty. I zero inbox. So when those things are sitting there, I got to schedule it. I show I show up even if I'm not my guest. I had a cord. I love that. I had a cord yesterday. So it was nice. Nice. My 14th, I think 15th 15. Wow. Wow. Turn right around.
00:41:21
Speaker
No, no, no. You're doing cool stuff. Well, and remember, the first thing that you said is that at your first financially naked session, that was the first time that you looked at your net worth. And that's the thing. It's like, yeah, you've got some debt in that side of the spreadsheet.
00:41:40
Speaker
And just like Mike was saying, and you got all this equity, like your financial situation, your wealth situation is going in the right direction. Like we're not, we're not worried about you, Kristin, like killing it. That was exactly right. And when I told, when I, cause I had like talked to my dad, we decided we were buying the house. I got pre-approved and then I told my trainer and I was like, all right, sit down, buckle up. We're taking a U-turn, like a big one. And he was like, all right.
00:42:10
Speaker
I was like, remember when I said I'm never ever leaving New York? Well, and never buying a house because I said I was like, I don't ever want to buy a house. That was, you know, I was very. Yeah, that's so funny. You should say that. I think I've said this on this podcast before. I really try not to speak in absolutes anymore because the thing that I've learned in my life, if I say I'm never ever going to do something or I would never do, you know, like
00:42:35
Speaker
I end up doing it. It has helped me not only personally, internally, but I also really try not to speak in absolutes when I'm communicating with someone. You always do this, or this happens all the time.
00:42:54
Speaker
It's a little neat trick that also helps people feel less defensive when you don't make it absolute. So yes, I have learned that a hard way, is never say never. And it's true. And it's true. It's very true. And be specific when you ask God or the universe for things, because sometimes you'll get a house and the angels are laughing, because it's not what you expected. But the universe and Allah's plans are better than the ones we have for ourselves sometimes.
00:43:25
Speaker
hey, at least you know you won't have an unexpected rent increase. That's true. Or get kicked out. Yeah. Well, I mean, to the points that we were making earlier, so as a homeowner in the United States, just straight up owning a home comes with a million billion privileges and it just does give you so many options. And one of the things that I would like to emphasize in this conversation is you bought a house
00:43:53
Speaker
That, so you mentioned earlier that your rent at one point was like $1,600, is that true? $1,650 a month. $1,650, and now your mortgage is how much per month? Everything together is going to be $649. That's the period, the house insurance, everything.
00:44:15
Speaker
freaking incredible. And so here's like so many things there. Number one, there are still houses in this country that cost less than $400,000. The average is $400,000. But if somebody who's listening to this truly, truly does want to own a home, they exist. You might not get to live in San Francisco. You might not get to live in New York, but those homes are available. The other thing is you're spending $1,000 less per month.
00:44:45
Speaker
on your most expensive baseline expense. Like you can do so many things with $1,000 per month. Like that's incredible. And then- Quick note, sorry. You said, I just want to make sure. So you said PMI. Yeah. Your house appraised higher than what the sale price was. Yes. PMI.
00:45:14
Speaker
I'm curious because 80, 20% down or 20% equity in 85,000 is 68,000. So are you telling me that in like six months you could probably refinance and get rid of PMI? Very soon, yeah. Nice. Because that means how much is your PMI?
00:45:37
Speaker
I don't know exactly what the PMI is versus the house insurance, which is included as well. But I know the mortgage, the mortgage alone is four hundred and eighty dollars four hundred eighty four or something like that. OK, it'll probably. Yeah, it'll probably. I mean, it's probably half that. The remainder.
00:45:57
Speaker
because I had a similar situation with a client who had a much bigger house in Miami and bought it pre-pandemic and because the values were raised so high, we were able to cash out refinance, take out 100,000
00:46:16
Speaker
Their mortgage payment was less because there was no more PMI. I mean, we extended the loan obviously, but their interest rate was much lower because this is before interest rates went up. We paid $55,000 off of credit card debt. So that was a like $1,400 a month payment he now didn't have anymore. And then they were able to put a bunch of money into the house because they wanted to do some renovations on it.
00:46:40
Speaker
all of that lower monthly mortgage payment, no more credit card debt and all because they had the house and because they're, and we got rid of the PMI and all that because they did the refinance for it with the appraisal. So that's amazing. Yeah. Oh, also I know we, we all know what PMI is. I guess private mortgage insurance is added onto a home when you don't
00:47:10
Speaker
either A, don't put 20% down or B, the difference between the equity of your home versus the sale price plus your percentage is still not 20% of the value of the home. It's all risk assessment basically for the lender. It's a way for them to guarantee to help pay down that
00:47:39
Speaker
Well, it doesn't pay down the principal. It covers in case if you default or stop paying the loan that they're going to be able to recoup. So once you hit that threshold, if you have PMI, you can always refinance. Unless if you got the house during COVID times and your interest rate is less than 3%, I probably wouldn't refinance.
00:48:06
Speaker
Sometimes they will let you do the appraisal. And if the house appraises, you don't necessarily have to refinance, but they'll remove the private mortgage insurance sometimes. So check with your lender if that's the thing. But yes, so PMI, private mortgage insurance, added cost if you don't have that equity or the down payment plus the equity. So you're really close. So that's really exciting. So Kristen, now that you are in your own home,
00:48:36
Speaker
And you have moved from where you weren't living for seven years and you've got every single option in the world available to you.
Future Aspirations and Podcast Note Writing
00:48:45
Speaker
What are you looking forward to in your future? Like what's on your horizon?
00:48:51
Speaker
So many things are on the horizon. I can't even, you know, I can't even list them all because well, number one, I work in taxes, so things are about to get very busy. So January through April is going to be just like kind of roughing it in the houses. It isn't saving a lot of money. So once May rolls around, I have all the money to do all the fun stuff I want to do, like the kitchen and the basement bathroom and build my ceramic studio in the back shed because that's a thing I'm doing.
00:49:19
Speaker
Also, one thing, as a homeowner, you now understand when the large sales are at the home improvement stores. So May is just around the time for Memorial Day. So plan those large purchases. You can buy that dishwasher. Uh-huh. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah.
00:49:44
Speaker
So first few months is going to be just hanging out and saving a lot of money, paying down the debt from the stuff I had to buy when the move nonsense was happening, getting through all of that. And then like I said, I'm building a ceramic studio in the back shed, so that will be fun. It used to be a woodworking shop, so it's big and beautiful.
00:50:03
Speaker
will do that. And I'm excited to be very close to my family. So my parents are across the street with my brother. My sisters both live in Pittsburgh, which is about an hour, hour and a half away, depending on how you drive and where in Pittsburgh you're going, if you're going to their house or meeting somewhere else, which is fun and exciting. So we're real close. And my best friends that I grew up with are in Ohio. So I'm just excited to be close to my community and be close to my people.
00:50:26
Speaker
Because in New York, I had a lot of theater friends when I was working in theater and a lot of people moved out, you know, once they got remote jobs or once things just got too expensive to live there. So a lot of my community had left New York. So I'm excited to come back to Ohio and be with community. I'm excited to connect with the Muslims here.
00:50:42
Speaker
There's an Islamic center. So when I was here painting, I did spend some time trying to meet, you know, the folks there. I met the imams and they sent me off with lots of gifts and books for my house. So that was really nice. I'm excited to go there and hang out and meet everybody and find that community here because I think it'll be important since it'll be less organic than in New York. I was just running into Muslim people everywhere.
00:51:04
Speaker
So, you know, have to seek them out and find them. So I'm excited about that. And, you know, I'm excited to just get back into my old hobbies, you know, like I was on the color guard when I was in high school. So my dad pulled out my flag and my rifle and I'm already in the yard spinning my flag because it's 55 degrees here.
00:51:19
Speaker
I'm excited to put my rollerblades on because when I was a kid, I used to rollerblade around this very driveway. So I'm going to get it re assaulted and rollerblade. So I'm just excited to connect with all the fun things I did when I was a kid that I just couldn't do in New York because there was no time, no space, no money to do them. I'm going to have more time, space and money to do all the things. And then after a year of saving, start going on vacations because I don't travel. So my brother will be able to watch the cats. I'll be able to go to the Maldives, go everywhere I ever wanted to go.
00:51:49
Speaker
Yeah, that's amazing. I'm gonna say I'm gonna use this word again. I so admire your intentionality, your ability to really design a life that works for you. And just the thoughtfulness that you use when you're just talking about and thinking about how you're going to make this amazing life in this new place.
00:52:15
Speaker
I'm inspired by your story. I feel like I've got some things that I can get intentional about in my life. So this is dope. I'm so glad that we're talking to you. And I do want to dive in just a little bit. We have a little bit of time. I want to talk about how you got into becoming a podcast note writer.
00:52:42
Speaker
It's just such a niche little thing, but it has been, I know for, we've talked about it before on the podcast, you being our show note fairy. So, so, so, so, so helpful and just really appreciate all the time that you do to support us. So I really, I don't think we've ever talked about how, I just know you've done it. I just didn't know how you got into it. So I'd love to hear that.
00:53:09
Speaker
That's a good question. I had to think about it when we were chatting before we started recording about this. Because again, in my pursuit to just make as much money as possible, the financial gym lets their members be warm up callers. And so I was already side hustling for them on the payroll doing warm up calls. And so it was either on the podcast or a newsletter.
00:53:30
Speaker
They mentioned that Shannon's now fiancé was writing the show notes. Vinny was writing them and they were looking for somebody to pay to do it and to just email Katrina. I just emailed Katrina and was like, I listen to the show every week. I'm already on payroll. I think that I'm actually the best option. Or was it you, Bevin? No, no, but I just love how you're like- Years ago. It should be, I will do it.
00:53:52
Speaker
Great. Yeah. I just like raised my hand and I was like, well, I'm on the payroll already. I already listened to the show, so I should just do the show notes. I'm actually the right option for this. And then I got an email back that was like, okay, we're going to interview a few people, but I'll let you know. And then I got an email back that was like, all right, you're in. You can just, here's the examples, have fun, basically. So it was another one of those just like,
00:54:14
Speaker
The universal law just gave me the opportunity through a podcast and I said, I'll do it. And then it's fun because I do like listening to podcasts and writing notes, so getting paid to do it is like.
00:54:26
Speaker
a dream. I love going to podcast show notes. I'm always in there in the resources, checking links and stuff like that as a listener. So I think it was like a fun thing to learn how to do. And I just love podcasts. So the more work I can do on them, eventually one day, we just love to do all kinds of work on podcasts because they're my favorite. Right. That's what we're trying to manifest. We just want to do this full time. It's amazing. We want to have a cute little studio where we invite our guests.
00:54:53
Speaker
wine and dine them before, after, maybe during, I don't know. Yeah. But yeah, no, I mean, that's, that's, um, so yeah. And you know, you do multiple podcasts now, right? That's been, you've been kind of growing your, your reach and
00:55:16
Speaker
more feathers in my cap of work. Yeah. Yeah. So I do both of the shows there and then I help your show, but that's, that's fun just because I love it. And I listened to the show anyway. So, you know, it's fun. You gotta have this fun projects, the fun passion projects that are on the side, because that's what keeps the work fun. I like to say, um, keeps things fresh. And then, yeah, doing all kinds of the fun stuff. They're trying to get my job to do.
00:55:41
Speaker
We have a podcast at work that they haven't produced in a long time, but I'm not sure if I could talk about taxes every week or plan a season. We'll see maybe next year. Maybe one day there'll be another brass taxes podcast, but we'll see.
00:55:57
Speaker
I mean, I feel like y'all's clients are so cool that there would be a way to make it really cool. So there are episodes that exist from back in the day that are really cool. Caroline, who used to work there, hosted it and interviewed some of our coolest, most interesting clients. So it exists, but it hasn't existed in a while. So that might be on the horizon, but I think I would want to produce my own podcast before I do one for work. OK, well, if you need support with that,
00:56:26
Speaker
reciprocal support available right in here. We're ready, ready for it. I didn't get any though. I would listen to your podcast. Thanks. Yeah. Great. Well, this has been an amazing conversation. You are dope AF. Thank you for being here. Thank you for coming out of the shadows and letting the people know who Kristin is. And I'm excited to read the show notes for this episode because we kind of got some really cool stuff.
00:56:56
Speaker
Yes. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. We love you and we're going to keep growing this podcast so that we can pay you money because you deserve it. Stop. This is such, such a fun thing to do. It's such a blessing and pleasure to be here and to listen to every week. And I'm so excited for the next season to come out. I mean, this will be part of that. So, you know, who knows what will already have been out since then, but I know it's going to be amazing because season one was just every single episode was phenomenal. I followed everyone on Instagram. I learned something new, like,
00:57:23
Speaker
you're knocking it out of the park, which is, I think, really hard to do with personal finance, you know, since there's so many out there. But I really think, and I listen to a lot of shows, so I can say that yours is very unique, very interesting. I recommend it to everybody who doesn't want to learn about money per se, how to budget, but maybe wants to just open their mind to personal finance and just talking about money in general. Because I think, you know, even just talking about it, even just saying things like, oh, you know, I'm paying this much for the house, or like, I'm spending the, you know, those little things can open up the doors, those little threads.
00:57:55
Speaker
So thanks for having me. Of course. Everybody listening, please, if you have any questions for Kristen, if you want to hear her again and have her come back, let us know. And if you've got any questions for Mike and I, or if you just have comments, concerns, your own story that you want to share,
00:58:16
Speaker
Hit us up in our comment section. Come find us on Instagram. We love you all. We want to talk to you as much as possible. And we'll see you next time. Yeah. Bye.
00:58:42
Speaker
If you've enjoyed today's episode, please don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe. That's the easiest way to support our show. We hope you took away a new nugget of information or perspective today, and we're grateful you took the time to listen to us. Until next time, bye. Bye.