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69! Nobody Wants To Land on THAT Moon
10 Plays9 days ago
Today we discuss why the number 69 can get a kid in trouble. Also please wash your butt cracks!
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Episode Significance
00:00:00
Speaker
And action. Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls and people upside down, inside out, outside and inside the gender binary and all around it Welcome to TOQ, or that's our Q for long, I am Danny Guarantee, joined as always- Thank you so much, I even messed up the middle.
00:00:19
Speaker
Joined as always by my super friendly guest hostess with the mostest, Adam. Let's talk about bodily fluids, folks. Okay, anyway, this is a very special episode.
00:00:32
Speaker
Welcome. I had that in the chamber the moment I hit the button. of course you did. When you said you would do the intro, I was like, perfect. I know exactly what I'm going to say. We were talking about all bodily fluids right before this and how gross people are.
00:00:47
Speaker
No, well, you were, I mean, yes, we were There was more to it, but yes. You were the one saying, the human body is disgusting. The human body is disgusting and fascinating. i Like, it's gross in there, but it's so fascinating. Welcome to a very special episode of That's Our Q. This is as far as mainline episodes go, the 69th episode. but Boy, do we have. Nice. Oh, man. Terry, get ready.
00:01:15
Speaker
for a family-friendly 69 episode.
Unfortunate Holiday Story
00:01:19
Speaker
Yes, because I purposely did not pick the worst thing I could read ever with my eyeballs.
00:01:26
Speaker
ah What do you say, buddy? Why would it be worse? what do you mean Well, because this one's at least like about the connotations of 69 and not the other one I read to you beforehand.
00:01:37
Speaker
Right. oh Yeah, we're not going get graphic here. No. You know, that's not a little gross, but, you know, we have standards. They're just really. Yeah, that's not what the show is for. We don't want you to vomit into your own hands or into your spouse's hands like while this is going on. Right. You should feel whole.
00:01:54
Speaker
Because when that happened to me, I almost followed it up. Which is very... Which would be very bad. One time my sister puked all over me like Christmas Day. I'm not gonna get that graphic.
00:02:07
Speaker
Yeah, it was fucking gross. She walked into the room. My brother older brother and I were sitting there In his room, she ran in covering her mouth and we were like, what, what, what? And then my brother goes, do you need to puke? And she kind of shakes her head and he's like, well, go to the bathroom. And she shakes her head. No. And then she points at his old Halloween bucket that he had under his bed is like an empty green bucket.
00:02:31
Speaker
And he says, no, you can't puke into that. And so she turned and she puked all over me And I was like, i first of all, i'm like, why would you not let her just puke in the bucket? I got puked on instead and you got puke on your floor.
00:02:45
Speaker
That was a terrible day. I had some brand new pajamas. They were like Aladdin pajamas that glowed
Locker Incident Debate
00:02:49
Speaker
in the dark. Not anymore. they were just, they were awesome. And they, I was like, well, there goes that. Anyway, let's share your question that you chose for us, Daniel. Sorry for that. ah no not at all. We're keeping it very you know nice and friendly and not at all disgusting this time. yeah Also, speaking of disgusting, I'm getting over a pretty gnarly flu. So if I sound a little different, that's why.
00:03:11
Speaker
Yeah. Speaking of disgusting bodily fluids, Adam's making a bunch of them right now. All right. I have so many. I'm actually drinking more fluids so I can make more bodily fluids with this fluid.
00:03:23
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, you gotta. You don't want to run out of fluids for your body fluids. Oh, no way. It's like keeping your car oiled. Yeah, that's how you dry up. You shrivel up. You gotta do it. You'll be a raisin. And then I'll eat you because I love raisins.
00:03:36
Speaker
I won't because I hate them. I want a nice plump grape. That's great. I mean, I love grapes too Yeah, plump. Raisins are also great. Especially if you get a nice plump raisin. Oh, oh yeah. That's just a grape. No, you can have plump raisins. just rotting grape.
00:03:50
Speaker
know you can have a plump raisin. Have you seen those like big old, like real thick boys? Here we go again. Alright, everybody buckle down. This is what the episode is now. What's the question? Raisins are just old, dehydrated, gross grapes, and I will not hear otherwise. Anyway, here's the question. oh ahead. very nice,
00:04:13
Speaker
ah wants to know if they are the asshole putting sixty nine on their locker I will summarize for you that they do cross country and their number for their meat is 69.
00:04:26
Speaker
They like you said the number for their meat. Go on. Look, they're track meat. Oh, got it. Got it.
00:04:37
Speaker
That's you're talking about a deli. Anyway, liar. They said they love having the number 69 because it is their favorite number and their lucky number and that they and their whole team and everybody all thought it was very funny. haha Your number is 69.
00:04:55
Speaker
They are in eighth grade, so everybody knows what the connotation is and. They know sex, they know the birds and the bees and all that stuff. They know they have an idea.
00:05:07
Speaker
There's no way they know they no shit. I don't doubt that. I was 17. I still barely know anything about it. Yeah, but that was like 40 years ago. Yeah, it was a long time ago. That was back before we had high speed internet.
00:05:18
Speaker
Yeah, I bet you these kids know about sex before they're even in like fifth grade now. they they know about it they know what of it they've heard of it they know like i bet you they know what it is like yeah yeah but i mean like i don't think they've done it hopefully but like they probably have like seen porn or something there are men out there that think that you know what it doesn't matter all i'm saying people just things that people think oh yeah we'll never know stupid So this person runs track and field. All right. So they run cross country. Their number is 69.
00:05:54
Speaker
So they took tape and put it up on their locker in saying 69. Okay. They would ask people if they like their number. Everybody was laughing about it, but then they got called into the principal's office and got yelled at saying that it could be sexual harassment and it only takes one person to be offended for it to be a problem.
00:06:14
Speaker
So they have to take it down, but they could also, get like a government sexual harassment thing involved. Uh, it turns out all they had to do was watch a sexual harassment video and they got a lunch detention.
00:06:31
Speaker
And I guess they have to take it down. Are they the asshole for putting the 69? They, they don't think they did anything wrong putting the 69 on their locker. This is some dumb eighth grader. Yeah. Grow up kid.
00:06:43
Speaker
Um, No. i like Well, first of all, I don't know if this is like ah am I the asshole style question? Cause this is just like, it's just, did I do something wrong? ah Is there a different Reddit for that? Is did I do something wrong? Is this wrong?
00:06:57
Speaker
I mean, no i specify am I the jerk? Am I overreacting? yeah I don't think this classifies as an, am I the asshole quote or, or problem, but I don't know. I have some opinions on this, but I feel like I'm going to rant about it. so I'm going to let you go first. That's the point.
00:07:14
Speaker
well what Do you have any feelings first? I mean, I'm torn. Like, it's not a huge deal for, you know, if if I were walking through the ice, I wouldn't be offended about it. I wouldn't give a crap.
00:07:27
Speaker
I would probably chuckle and move on. But I do see where the um principle's coming from. It can be... something that not everybody wants to see and it does only take one person to be offended for it to be a problem and i don't know with this school i went to catholic school eighth graders and pre-k were in the same building you know even though they're an eighth grader and they know what it means and they ha ha funny sex number that doesn't mean that there's not
00:08:01
Speaker
or or could never be younger kids walking through that don't know what that is and then start asking the wrong questions or a parent of a young child sees it and they don't like it.
00:08:12
Speaker
I think it's way too far to do anything to get the government involved with, you know, it's not even like they put 69 on there to be funny. They put it on there partly because it's funny, but also because it is their track number.
00:08:26
Speaker
I think part of the blame lies with the track. They shouldn't give that number. now especially to like young teenagers, knowing what it is. um But it's just... I think just have them take it down.
00:08:41
Speaker
Maybe give them a new number. It sucks that it's your favorite number and your lucky number. But, yeah, I don't think it's that big a deal. that I don't think there's any asshole here. I don't think the principal's the asshole for telling them to take it down. Maybe if they had done more...
00:08:59
Speaker
punishment for this because it's really not that huge a deal. I don't think the kid's an asshole for putting the 69 on there. It is funny and it's their track number, but they should take it down if they're told to take it down.
Creative Punishment Ideas
00:09:12
Speaker
There's my rant. I'm ready. think we should just stuff the kid in the locker for 69 minutes. And if he stays in there and he doesn't freak out, then let him keep it on the locker.
00:09:23
Speaker
But OK, so like a trial by fire kind of deal. Yeah, like, let's just shove him in the locker and just lock it up the way he can't get himself out. And we'll say, hey, we'll be back in just under 70 minutes.
00:09:34
Speaker
And if you don't have a full blown panic attack or if you don't freak out and get all claustrophobic, then, hey, you know what? You've earned it. You can have that number. But if you can't stay in there, buddy, then, hey, guess what?
00:09:47
Speaker
Sorry. Now you have some trauma and you lose your number. Are we giving air holes? All lockers have air holes in them already. Well, we can block them. I mean, I don't think we have to modify the locker, ah you know, because they already have like those little sluts in there. not sluts. Sluts.
00:10:06
Speaker
Oh, so that's why you want him in the locker. 69 minutes in heaven. Gotcha. I was armed between saying slits and slots and sluts came out. actually made it well it Don't you hate it when sluts just come out? Yeah. yeah They have a bunch of sluts in their lockers. And so people can breathe because there's more sluts. Oh, get it.
00:10:30
Speaker
That's kind it would be so like a slot is something that's for like putting something into like, oh, that's like a male slot. I think a slit is like it's an air hole. So, yeah, there's like there's little vent slits like in there that like let's air circulate in a locker. Well, but I'm asking really is do you want to do hard mode?
00:10:46
Speaker
No, I think the air slots and unless the and unless the kid says, sure, can I do it in half the time if we do it on challenge mode? And then we cover up all the air holes and see if he can just control his breathing long enough to not suffocate in the locker.
00:11:04
Speaker
Yeah, then there you go. You earned it. Now it's maybe 34 minutes, 34 and a half minutes instead of now. What if kindment what if I'm an adult?
00:11:16
Speaker
and I want it taken down, can I go into a locker for 70 minutes and be like, I beat your score, so now it has to come down? I think it's just you go head to head. Both you get into the locker adjacent to each other. You can talk as much shit as you want, but someone has someone's got to give.
00:11:31
Speaker
Well, that's fine. i I like the idea of going head to head because I don't lift weights or anything, but I'm pretty sure I could take an eighth grader. Oh, yeah. I beat kids up all the time. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I could win that fight.
00:11:44
Speaker
Yeah, but I mean, like, but it would be like you're in one locker that he's in another locker and you're shut in there and you have to. Oh, I don't get to beat him up. No, no, no. In this, it's you put them, you both in the locker and then whoever goes the longest gets to make the decision. of well What if I what if I put them in the locker and then throw the locker down a hill? How are you going to get the locker out? Those things are screwed into other lockers.
00:12:09
Speaker
You'd have to take like a whole world of that. got friends. I'm old enough that I said you don't lift weight. Yeah, well, I'm old enough that I can go and rent out like one of those little little mini construction vehicles from Home Depot.
00:12:23
Speaker
I mean, you could, but what I'm saying is like you'd still have to move it. I have age on my side, bitch. i can I can pay for a lot of services that would help me beat the crap out of you. i mean, it's true. I mean, you can choose your champions. You can choose your services.
00:12:37
Speaker
But yeah, I mean, that's that's where I'm at. It's just like if you really want it that bad, then you have to earn it. OK, although I do think if it's like, oh, we're team 69 or like we're track meets, you know, whatever it is that it's is for your team. I do think you should be allowed to represent that somewhere to say like, hey, this is just what our number is like.
00:12:56
Speaker
You can't it's a number at the end of the day. I think what gets dicey in this and this is my real answer is. The fact that he keeps drawing attention to it and we don't know in what context he is doing it because, you know, like, you know, we've all been a kid.
00:13:12
Speaker
We all like to be edgy, especially when like we're getting into our teens and we think we're going say some outrageous shit. Like this kid knows, oh this is a sexy number. This is the number. Right. So it goes from like, oh, this is my special number. Hey.
00:13:23
Speaker
And if you don't keep drawing attention to it, then like it becomes part of the scenery. Like people don't typically notice it that much. It did say in here. He kept asking, what do you think of my number? If people like their, like the number on the locker, which. Right. So that's, yeah, that's the problematic portion that I think needs to be, uh, diagnosed is like, how are you saying it? If you're like, Hey, especially if it's to other women or other girls, or if it's still like other dudes around other girls and being like, Hey, cause you know, I do think that there's like a infestation of it within,
00:14:00
Speaker
the internet of just like the way streamers and influencers have a grip on a lot of young minds that a lot of young boys, especially, and a lot of young girls are learning like what not to be. And so are young boys and how they should look at other genders or people they're interested in. And so like, I do think there is like a slippery slope there where this kid is like, Hey, you know, you should come look at this because wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
00:14:26
Speaker
You know what i'm saying? Like that, that's the, That's the problem. That's where I'm like, okay, I can see where somebody might be like, this could give the wrong impression to someone. This could offend somebody. This could upset somebody. You might give off the wrong thing. It only takes one, you know, and heaven forbid you say it to someone who really does get offended because they think you're being perverse and they go and tell their mom or their dad or whomever their guardian is. And then now the school's got a big problem on their hands.
00:14:55
Speaker
yeah Like that's where I'm like, okay, that's where I think if you are trying to draw attention to it very regularly, you are being disruptive and you could upset somebody. Where if you just leave it on your locker because you're like, hey, that's the number that's important to me because it's, you know, my track and field or my cross country, whatever it is.
00:15:12
Speaker
team number there. I don't see anything wrong with that, but just fucking leave people alone about it. Just let it blend into the background and be proud of your team. Cool. I don't care, right? If you were a football player and that was the number on your Jersey, you should be allowed to fly that on your locker. If you're, if you're allowed to decorate your locker, that is most people had in my school had to decorate the inside of their locker.
00:15:32
Speaker
Like it could be whatever you wanted on the inside door or on the inside walls, if you could fit it, but we weren't allowed to put stuff on the outside of the locker. But you know, if you're allowed to decorate the outside of your locker, then you say, Hey, that's my Jersey number. If it says person's last name, 69, like, okay, that's your number.
00:15:49
Speaker
You should be allowed to do that. But if you're just being like a little perv and being like, Hey, you right. Hey guys. Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey girls. Did you see this? Right. Am I right? Like, okay, now you're being a little dickweed and yeah. you The locker.
00:16:01
Speaker
i was thinking while you were talking, that it's also the fact that it's a school, like, yeah, it sucks that you're not allowed to really have any fun at school kind of thing, but like- had a blast at school.
00:16:12
Speaker
Well, first of all, yes, you can, but like, There are certain things that just should not show up in school. That kind of being one of them, like you are there at the end of the day to learn.
00:16:24
Speaker
You need to keep, you know, and it's one of those things where if you give an inch, kids will take a mile. You cannot let kids have some funny stuff or fun. Yeah. and not fun, ah some inappropriate things, but not others. They will keep pushing the envelope. So it's one of those things.
00:16:42
Speaker
As an adult, you kind of realize like, yeah, OK, I really can't let these kids have any rope when it comes to like inappropriate stuff at school, because you give a little bit and suddenly you have to make that concession for everybody and it gets out of control real quick.
00:16:59
Speaker
Sure. So like I do get it. I still don't think there's any asshole here, really. um unless i don't think this is and keep it up. Right. I don't think this is that this fits that that Reddit thread. I don't think that's what this is.
00:17:16
Speaker
Usually there's a very clear this person did wrong or this person did wrong. But it's just, hey, I did a thing. And some people are like, hey, you can't do that. Like, I guess. Let's let's give it a little change then.
00:17:28
Speaker
what if it was on, am I overreacting? Am I overreacting for having to take down the 69? Or is the school overreacting? Or is the school overreacting to it Sure.
00:17:39
Speaker
That would fade a little bit better. And I think just to protect themselves, again, because you, this child, are constantly getting people to look at it, like, you drew attention to it. If you just put it up and let it go, it probably would have been fine. Right?
00:17:56
Speaker
But, like... Also, that's not your lucky number. Don't try to put more emphasis on it than you need to. No one has lucky numbers. People just choose a number and say it's their lucky number because they like that number.
00:18:07
Speaker
Most people weren't blessed by a number. I'm like, oh, well, now I must have this always and forever. It's very rare. Let's just get the idea of lucky numbers. Okay. It's a number that you like probably for the reason that most people like it.
00:18:20
Speaker
It's not your lucky number. Get over yourself. But if it's a number that's important to you because of your team, sure. Then it's a number that means something to you beyond just a silly number. That's like my team. That's a place I love. it That's a group of people I enjoy.
00:18:33
Speaker
Fine. Cool. Team 69 all the way. Absolutely. Right. If you're like, but nobody, nobody. It's going be like, hey, did you see my team number?
00:18:43
Speaker
Hey, hey, hey,
Humor and Cultural References
00:18:45
Speaker
hey. It's just it's just about my team because special to me. There's there's no one who's going to say that that doesn't have like a secret agenda underneath drawing attention to it. You know saying? The only way this would ever work with another number would be like, hey, do you remember that legendary player that was that graduated last year? I got his number.
00:19:02
Speaker
Sure. That's the only way somebody will ever bring up a number for their sport in school and be like, I'm calling attention to this, not because it it has a special meaning to the school itself, but to me.
00:19:14
Speaker
Right. I couldn't tell you any 69 being the sex number and be like, right. I couldn't tell you anybody's Jersey numbers that was on my high school team, football team.
00:19:26
Speaker
So like nobody's number meant shit to me. So like, I i just didn't care. um Yeah. So, yeah, I think the long and short of it is there's no asshole here.
00:19:38
Speaker
Is there an overreaction? No, I think the school's reaction is appropriate based on my assumption. Again, I am assuming, but my assumption that you've been drawing way too much attention to it.
00:19:50
Speaker
Like just like trying to get everyone to talk about it and look at it. If you just put it up and let it alone, it probably would have been fine. Maybe somebody might've reported it and be like, oh, hey, why does he get to have that number up?
00:20:01
Speaker
But also just put it on the inside of your locker. No one else will see it, right? You get to to see it every time you can put your combination in. Like, I don't know, if it's just for you and it's important just for you, then put it on the inside of your locker and then it'll be fine. That's the compromise. Put it on the inside and then stop drawing attention to it. yeah on the side I don't think that's going to work out, though, because I honestly, I do not think that this is because it's important to them at all.
00:20:23
Speaker
I don't think it is either. I don't. I think they're using that as an excuse. Oh, it's my favorite number. It's my lucky number. Do you just like that number because it's the sex number? Like, let yeah is that why it's your favorite number?
00:20:33
Speaker
And if it's eloquently written, the kid probably had AI write it. So like, you know, like, I know it's it's not eloquently written. OK, good. I was going to say if this is written in a way the written by like an eighth grader. Okay, good. I was going to say, because most people have to have a fucking robot. No, that's not like to put down anybody either. They are in eighth grade. like They should write an eighth grader, but you get bits that are like, she might have to report it to a government sexual harassment cult or whatnot.
00:21:01
Speaker
Yeah, that's how I would write that in eighth grade, too. Awesome. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, yes, I do believe that this was actually written by a person. Okay, good. um Yeah, so that's that's where I'm at.
00:21:15
Speaker
um So, no one's an asshole, but you knew what you were doing. You knew what you were doing. Listen, we all want to look at it and go, nice. But that's the thing. Can I just talk about this for a second? Look. I'd love it if you did.
00:21:30
Speaker
It's just, look. Yes, it's a funny number because it stood the test of time. It's just, you know, eventually people just started saying nice and then you move on.
00:21:43
Speaker
Right. Like, that's it. But if you keep hammering this joke all the time, it's just it loses meaning. It loses gusto because everybody already knows it's not.
00:21:55
Speaker
Nothing's new under the sun. And really, you don't want to force it. It's when that number comes up organically that you go nice. Right. And then you move on. Like no one has a full on conversation about the number 69 beyond just acknowledging it and then moving on.
00:22:10
Speaker
Like I've never had a long ass discussion like this where someone's like, well, your bill comes to $69 even ago. Nice. And then we move on. It's like, okay, so what are we doing today? That's it.
00:22:21
Speaker
That's it. thought we We actually have made a little game out of it. So if I see 69 somewhere, I'll go to Mbaluga and I'll just be like, nice. And then it's up to her to find it.
00:22:35
Speaker
Sure. But see, but that's it. Then then it's like that's a reverse engineer. she talk and She looks at me and goes, nice. And then that's it. We're done. That's exactly it It's like, you know, the only time this ever gets stretched out beyond turning into a little game is when you want to see if somebody else notices it and you don't say anything. Like I've done that. We're like, I see it. And I'm just like trying to really.
00:22:55
Speaker
you know, ah what's what's the word I'm looking for? Where i'm really trying to accent it with my eyes, like really trying to draw attention to it without like overdoing it and seeing if somebody else sees it first. And then we just then you just kind of give that knowing nod to somebody, especially if you're like. actually doing it right now, that one where you kind of make the duck face and go like, yeah. Right. And then you look at each other and you just do the nod, you know, like I love the nod. The nod is so good. The nod is like, there's a couple of different nods you can do, but there's the one that just most people acknowledge that when you see you just kind of give like a little smirk and you kind of tip up your head a little bit and go, yep.
00:23:29
Speaker
Yeah. Like, that's it. That's it. And you can use that nod for so many things. But, um you know, even just a greeting, if you just like tip your head up real quick and keep walking, that's like a sup. And then just keep going. Right.
00:23:42
Speaker
So anyway, there's ways to appreciate it without just like, you know, just beating that horse far past its expiration date. That's with any joke. Like comedy is...
00:23:55
Speaker
There's a time and a place to keep repeating a joke and having a call back to it because it's fresh. But then like if that's the only thing you can like my brother used to be real bad at it. My brother was always very socially poor, socially awkward. He just the he he wasn't very funny and he knew that like he didn't always get like a rise.
00:24:13
Speaker
So like when he found something that did make somebody laugh. understandably, he was like, well, I have to lean into this because like, oh, people like this. And then he went back to being annoying because that's all he wanted to talk about was this funny thing that he did because he was riding the high of, oh, people might like me now.
00:24:30
Speaker
And it's sad. And I understand like how your brain can do that. But that's another example of if you just hammer it too much then it's just like okay it was funny then it's annoying now like let's not let's not make this thing annoying just let it happen organically if it's you know everybody can acknowledge you go ah nice and then you move on i'm unlike just i don't know there's there's an art to comedy and i think it's like it's the same thing with like a penis on something like if something makes the i know
00:25:04
Speaker
oh If something happens to make the shape, you go like, oh my god it like oh my god, look, it looks like a penis. And that's it. But you don't go around drawing them everywhere unless you're that person, and it's annoying.
00:25:18
Speaker
Oh, I have never understood that. man I had so many... like in my high school, dudes especially were just obsessed with drawing what they, like, again, you know, you draw like the two little circles and the big old stick at the end. And like, it looked more like a rocket ship than it looked like an actual genitalia.
00:25:34
Speaker
And I'm like, and dudes were obsessed with drawing it everywhere in their assignment books, in other people's books, spray painting it, drawing it on lockers. Like, why are you so obsessed with this thing? If you're so afraid of being gay, why do you come want to keep looking at? when you' wrong where I was in high school. I drew it.
00:25:52
Speaker
All over the place, like on like like friends car windows and stuff. If they were dirty, I would draw one. But that was the joke to them is like, hey, I caught you with dirty windows. Here's your punishment.
00:26:03
Speaker
I wouldn't just write it in my own books and stuff. I still can't draw it now. I don't know how to do it. Like, I just never drew penises on anything.
00:26:14
Speaker
It's like super. What was a super bad? I think where the one kid is like obsessed with drawing them and draws them in all different shapes and sizes. Oh, right. yeah yeah Yeah. He makes them all veiny and shit. ah Yeah. I just don't.
00:26:27
Speaker
I just don't get it. But i you mean, whatever. But yeah, I just kept thinking for a lot of dudes who say, oh, that's gay. Get that away from me. Oh, that's gay. That's gay. That's gay. And that was like the whole thing in my school was like, oh, that's gay.
00:26:39
Speaker
Right. You guys sure do a lot of gay shit for being so afraid of being gay. Sure. Obsessed with penises for being afraid of them. You know, like when I saw an opportunity to draw anything on somebody's thing, I always signed my name. I wanted people to
Nostalgic TV Shows
00:26:53
Speaker
know I did it. It wasn't a penis. It was my signature. I was like, I signed your thing. If I got famous, you're welcome.
00:26:59
Speaker
I would sign my before id set my name on people's shoes with a marker. like nowadays i just write dan was here with w-u-z oh yeah i they are i used to do kilroy was here right around like ninth oh yeah kilroy was here and i before i even knew what that was from i saw it was like on a lot of looney tunes that was a joke that popped up a lot where someone's like oh is he here and it's like kilroy was here and i was that's funny i actually went by kilroy for a long time as a nickname and um not in school but like on the internet and um uh but I wrote Kilroy was here. And then one day an English teacher, when I wrote it on my paper, I do it a lot on my paper and I wasn't very good, but I always wrote Kilroy was here next to my name.
00:27:39
Speaker
And then one time my English teacher drew the iconic image that I didn't know of at the time of like the guy with the nose and he's looking over the wall. And I was like, Hey, what is that? And he goes, Oh, I thought you knew. That's why you wrote it there. And I told him where I got the influence from. And he directed me to like somewhere in the library to kind of read up. He's like, hey, this is actually what this was. This was a very. yeah This was an actual thing.
00:28:00
Speaker
This was an actual thing that World War Two soldiers did that like Hitler thought that was like some assassin that was going to come get him because there were Kilroy was here, was written everywhere, all over the place. They would sign it on German tanks when they weren't around.
00:28:13
Speaker
just to spook Hitler to make him think like, oh, this person might be in my ranks. Like this Kilroy was here thing was just a funny joke to let other soldiers know like, hey, we were here. Right.
00:28:24
Speaker
And but like when they started seeing it signed everywhere, Hitler was like going mad. He was like, who is this person? Is he in my ranks? Should I am I in danger? And so they just kept doing it because they knew it was like psychological warfare during the war.
00:28:39
Speaker
And I didn't know that. I just thought it was a silly thing that like ah Marvin the Martian or or Bugs Bunny wrote on the moon once. like I'll be honest. I didn't know that either. I just knew I knew what the image was and I knew it had something to do with World War Two in America. I did not know. I'm looking at it right now. I did not know it was meant to be like, yeah, almost a psychological game of we were here already.
00:29:01
Speaker
Right. Like, like, especially because they would start if they could get close enough to German vehicles, they would write it in like white paint on the vehicles. And then if they got back, they'd like, keep what the fuck is this? he he Is he here now? Is he in one of the tanks? Did he come with you? He was near. You know, who is this person?
00:29:19
Speaker
um Because no one knew. i don't even know where the word Kilroy came from. That's the part that I don't know. I'm looking at right now. It originated with shipyard inspector, James J. Kilroy.
00:29:30
Speaker
I would use it to mark his work when he inspected the ships and then soldiers adopted it globally as a good luck charm to claim a space marking it. There we go. You're already. Yeah. And so they would just do that all like wherever they were. And if if other soldiers saw it, they were like, oh, some of our guys were here. This might be safer or whatever. But then they just learned like, hey, our intelligence says that the ranking officers in the German military are they're freaking out because they think they have someone amongst them. That is funny. It goes to show that like, you know, we spend billions, trillions on all these crazy things for warfare. But sometimes, man,
00:30:11
Speaker
You don't you overthink it like a simple picture can really play some mind games with with other people. oh For sure. For sure. When I was a kid, I think the first time I saw that I can't remember the full cartoon. It was like a mini skit. I think it was a Looney Tune might have been a Tex Avery thing, but it was like a cat, this cat character.
00:30:29
Speaker
who was just trying to find a place to get peace. There were fireworks everywhere. He kept trying to go all over the country, trying to just find a place that was quiet. And every time he thought he found one, an explosion happened, a battle happened, fireworks went off, just some crazy shit where there was just horns going off everywhere. Then finally he finds a spaceship and he blasts off off onto the moon. And he sits there and he's just like, ah, peace at last.
00:30:53
Speaker
Oh, and I'm the first person ever on the moon. And then he looks over and there's a big space rock next to him that says Kilroy was here on it. And it was just like a little joke of like somebody was here already. And I was like, that's funny. So I just started writing it on shit because I thought that funny.
00:31:05
Speaker
And then like my English teacher was like, hey, man, there's a whole lot more than this. And you think, buddy, you should check this out. And I was like, holy fuck. I had no idea. Dude, organic rabbit holes like that are so good. Yeah, yeah. So just in case you guys didn't know that that are listening, there you go. ah You know, it's just a... Thank you, Mr. Kilroy, for... Thank you. Yeah, thank you, Inspector Joy.
00:31:26
Speaker
But let's talk about, before we wrap up, Danny, I have to draw attention to the elephant in the room, what 69 really is. Let's just talk about why that's important, okay?
00:31:37
Speaker
mind sorry Among... elephant. Among many things... The most important reason we acknowledge this number is because that is the year 1969 is when we went to the moon.
00:31:55
Speaker
When a man walked on the moon, July 20th, Neil Armstrong became the first man from earth. Cause I don't know about other planets to walk on the moon. don't, I don't think we've ever sent people to any other planets. Yeah. No, no, no. I mean, i don't know if other planets have sent someone to the moon.
00:32:15
Speaker
Oh, probably not. I don't know. At least none that we know of. Exactly. We don't know. so I say that the first person from Earth, the first Earthling to walk on the moon alongside Buzz Aldrin and a few others, you know, inspiring, you know, running alongside the night, you know, what was it a space oddity first or a space odyssey, whatever it was with David Bowie, that song too.
00:32:42
Speaker
Ground control at a major time. So that's the big one. Also, Woodstock Music Festival was in 1969. That was in June. 50,000 people in attendance.
00:32:55
Speaker
Woodstock. Famous. Right? Okay. Okay. Yeah, I see where you're going. There is just one big problem. What?
00:33:06
Speaker
Well, you see... ah There's also this other little known thing about 69 that it's some kind of sexual position, right? And that girls like it. But I know for a fact that girls don't actually like sex. I know because I've had sex with plenty of them and not a single one of them has liked it. So obviously none of them like it, which tells me, right, that all this stuff from 1969, I don't think any of it is real. I don't think Woodstock happened. And I think that the moon landing was a hoax.
00:33:36
Speaker
I don't know what the fuck that was, but that was great. I can't believe if you said that with your mother listening. there I was trying to keep it away from that, but you just went. well This is just a little known thing about 69. You know, mostly it's about those things, but I don't think they're real.
00:33:55
Speaker
Oh, well, you know, that's that's fair. I mean, it's okay for you to because women have your feelings. Because women. out them Do you think the Earth is flat, too? It's obviously their fault. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, clearly the Earth is flat.
00:34:10
Speaker
Because yeah when I look out at the Earth, I don't see what looks like a big boobie, and boobies are round. So clearly it must be flat.
00:34:20
Speaker
The Lara Crofts weren't. They were like polyhedron. They were sharp as hell, man. Those were mountains. Yeah. So anyway, that's kind of long and short of it on why those number that number is important. 1969, an important year.
00:34:34
Speaker
Fun fact about me learning that fun fact was I remember the year. ah Do you remember a show on the Disney Channel from years ago called Even Stevens where Shia LaBeouf got its start?
00:34:46
Speaker
Yes. I never watched it, but I know the show. There was a musical episode and one of the best songs that came from it. but The whole thing is a musical because... his sister Ren is having a fever and she's having a bunch of fever dreams. So she thinks she's in school and a bunch of these musical things are happening, but she doesn't know that it's a dream yet.
00:35:08
Speaker
And so like this whole thing happens, these different musicals and she's the real smart whiz kid of the family. She's the real intelligent one. And she's in a thing and she's like, Oh, I was supposed to do a report. My rival who's usually second place and all of I'm going for valedictorian.
00:35:23
Speaker
He did a really stellar report. I have to beat him. I'm driven by all this. And she says, but all I can remember about the moon is that we went there in 1969. I can't think of anything else. I'm drawing a blank. I didn't do my report. I don't know what's wrong with me.
00:35:38
Speaker
She was sick. That's why. um And so she just... improvs a song where the entire song is just her saying in different ways that we went to the moon in 1969. There's no other context to it, but she just rhymes it in different ways while saying the same thing over and over again. And it's a very clever, very fun song.
00:36:00
Speaker
And I just have that burned into my memory. If anybody says, what year do we go to the moon? I'm just, I just, I know we went, because the opening lyric is we went to the moon in 1969, not 1970. What was it? Not 1970, but a year before that. And then something else I can't remember. but i like looked that up That actually sounds very interesting. It's a great song. say it In all these different ways.
00:36:22
Speaker
Yeah, like I think one of it's like, we went to the moon in 1969, not 1970, but a year sooner. We went to the moon in 1969. That's when we made a landing that was lunar. And like, it's just lyrics like that where she just says the same thing, but in different ways. Amazing.
00:36:39
Speaker
I hope she's awesome.
The Lighthearted Take on Hygiene
00:36:40
Speaker
day It's she actually, no, everybody joins in the whole, the class is into it and they're like, yeah. And they're all cheering at the end of the song. And and the teacher's like, cool, but you didn't tell us any new information. You get an app. Oh,
00:36:56
Speaker
It's a great episode, man. um Yeah, I highly recommend it. And at the very end of the episode, when she wakes up and realize that she's been having a fever dream, her brother played. What is what is Shia LaBeouf's character's name? I can't even think of it right now.
00:37:12
Speaker
um What? How did they not know? was fucking God. I can't remember. who was it Anyway, her brother comes up and ah he has like a tray of food and he sings. I've got some soup, delicious chicken soup in the theme of the song that she dreamed that she sang. And so she freaks out. She's like, oh, fuck.
00:37:30
Speaker
um She's like, am I still asleep? Anyway, great episode. Great show, honestly. And yeah, that's why I know that. oh Well, you know what? I'm happy you know that. That's very good.
00:37:43
Speaker
That's a great bit of random knowledge. It's a great song, but i'm really upset that I can't remember. um What the fuck his character's name? Lewis, that's his name. ge I would never you give me 100 years. and there some what What is even Stevens? Is it their last name?
00:38:00
Speaker
Stevens is their last name. Yeah. OK. And it's usually like a rivalry between w Ren and Lewis where they're just they just, you know, sibling rivalry. He's a little bit of he's the younger brother. He's always given her shit. She's like the perfect.
00:38:12
Speaker
sister and like has her own problems she's dealing with. And so they're always just like finding ways to like one up each other and shit. And yeah, I was too busy watching Ren and Stimpy for that.
00:38:24
Speaker
I am. I loved Ren and Stimpy, but I didn't watch it as as adamantly. I think I just caught it when i were on. I have one core memory of that show where Stimpy loses his fart and he tries to find it again.
00:38:38
Speaker
Impy loses his fart? Yeah. That's awesome. ah I fucking love that. It's a lot about me, right? That that's my childhood. I think that's a great premise. I think it was like, he farted and it was alive. it was like a live and get fart glass.
00:38:59
Speaker
And it was cold and alone. And he's trying to find it. That's great. I genuinely can only remember like so a few quips and of course, happy, happy, joy,
00:39:12
Speaker
But like, happy, joy, joy. Yep. But like, I just don't. I remember there was like, what was name? Powdered Toast Man was a character. ah yeah he was like the superhero with breadhead.
00:39:24
Speaker
Yeah. And then. god yeah, I can't. I can't remember. I remember. have to rewatch Ren and Stimpy now. They did revive it when like Spike TV was new and they were trying to come out with like edgy. It was like, remember Spike TV? It was like, oh it's the man's network. I used to watch Mansour's and back then I was maners on there. They had that. That was real.
00:39:48
Speaker
What was that one that a stripper Ella that short lived animated series where Pamela Anderson voiced a character like herself and she just did a lot of sexual things as a superhero because it's for men. because you And then and then Thousand Ways to Die I used to watch a lot. Yeah.
00:40:03
Speaker
Thousand Ways to Die. And I think that was a That was when they revived Ren and Stimpy for a short while, and they kind of reanimated it and gave it updated graphics, and it was written for a modern more modern audience, but it was also very edgy. It was very adult content, even more so than the original cartoon was, even though it was a kid's cartoon.
00:40:24
Speaker
um And I remember just being like, oh yeah, Ren and Stimpy, don't think that lasted very long either. No, I don't think it did. Although, who was the one they just did a couple years ago that was apparently pretty good? Uh...
00:40:36
Speaker
A remake? Warner Brothers. Yeah. The three Yakko, Wakko, and Dot. God. Animaniacs. Animaniacs. Didn't they just do like a refresh of that?
00:40:47
Speaker
They did. They did a couple new seasons. I've heard it Hulu though, so haven't gotten to see them all. I saw a few episodes. I loved it. I always hoped for like a modern take because they always fried everybody in the social and political spectrum on their show back in the day, but I was too young to really appreciate it.
00:41:03
Speaker
But They updated it. They had a modern take on it. There was a lot more of the actual Warner Brothers and sister because back in the day, it was like a little bit of them and a lot of other skits. Yeah, it was like a lot more heavily influenced by them.
00:41:15
Speaker
I honestly wanted to see more of them. That was where a lot of great cartoons came from, like Buttons and Mindy. ah What the fuck is that? Thinking the Brain came from Thinking the Brain came from that. Uh, yeah, I love Animaniacs. I still watch old clips from like their old music videos where they sing about the States and capitals and the countries, the presidents. What's that?
00:41:37
Speaker
Fingerprints. Finger. Oh yeah. Fingerprints. Not on your life. Yeah. so Yeah. Like we on the prints I found them. No fingerprints, not on your life. Like what a great little sneaky. just So good. Yeah.
00:41:51
Speaker
yeah um It's a great show and I love it. And, um, go watch Animaniacs. yeah ausmaniaiax Go watch Go watch, uh, run in Stimpy, even Stevens.
00:42:02
Speaker
Uh, but most of all, just please, for the love of God, try not to be an asshole this year. All right. don't have to be an asshole. Shit this year. Don't be a piece of shit this year. Don't be a piece of shit. We should say that at the end of every every episode. Just look. i know I know it's like July. The year is half over, but just don't be a piece of shit this year.
00:42:23
Speaker
yeah Exactly. like all the way into All the way into December of 2026, we're going to be saying, don't be a piece of shit this year. You got this far.
00:42:34
Speaker
It's never too late to unshittify yourself. It's never too late to not be a piece of shit. right. I used to say life's an ass when shit happens. Wipe it. There you go. And I will say i want to make a call back to, I think, episode one of this show. I'm pretty sure it was episode one, which was the episode was titled Wash Your Ass.
00:42:55
Speaker
And I cannot express enough. I have too much information that I've seen through social media that a lot of people, specifically a lot of men, believe that wiping their ass and washing their ass makes them queer. Which, first of all, so what? Second of all, no, it doesn't. So...
00:43:15
Speaker
Please don't be gross. Don't be a piece of shit this year and don't sit in your own shit this year. Wipe and watch your ass, you fucking weirdos. That reminds me. Mbaluga got me for Christmas this year a bidet. Yeah, I have to install it.
00:43:31
Speaker
i'll tried I've never tried one. I've never been there. I've wanted to, though, because I've heard so many good things about them. yeah i think it would be alarming. She finally caved and was like, all right, fine. Let's get you a bidet.
00:43:43
Speaker
Well, because they're supposed to be so like there's there's so much cheaper too. Cause you use like very little toilet paper. Yeah, that's true. uh, yeah, I've heard that like, you might like do like a a wipe afterwards just to kind of dry everything off and then dry yourself off. But like, yeah, I've heard it's a good too, but I haven't, I haven't tried it yet.
00:44:05
Speaker
Me neither, but I have, you know, you're about to get into the shower. You're like, Oh man, I got a shit too. You just take a shit, you give it like a courtesy wipe and then you wash the rest off. Oh yeah, for sure. Yeah. I'm assuming it's just going to be like that.
00:44:20
Speaker
Yeah. Take that shower hat off, crank it on nice and hot and just. Yeah. You put your thumb halfway over the hole so it shoots out with more pressure. Yeah. There's a lot of people who, you know, there's a lot of people who like sun their perineums.
00:44:33
Speaker
I feel like me doing that to clean myself is the closest to sunning my perineum that I'll ever Yeah. I don't think I'm ever going to do that. But I feel like that extra warmth is just so nice and you feel so fresh after you're done. Listen, folks, it's it's just listen. First of all, don't be afraid to be gay. If you're gay, you're just going to be gay. OK, second of all, don't be weird. It's not it's not it's it's gross to not clean yourself. OK, and I just feel like I need to say this on the off chance that someone will listen to this who doesn't do that. If you're offended at me telling you to wipe and wash your ass, think about why. why let me put it this way.
00:45:10
Speaker
If I were a girl and I know I'm not, I never wanted to be, never want to be in the future as far I know. but And I know I can't speak for the you know, the female experience and all that.
00:45:22
Speaker
But I believe I can, in this instance, say without a doubt that if I were a girl, I would rather talk to a guy who might be a little gay, but has a clean asshole than one who smells like shit and is like, no, that's gay. Ew, that's disgusting. I ain't no gay.
00:45:40
Speaker
Right. Shut the hell up, you gross, disgusting piece of crap. If you're so if you're if you're scratching that much down there, there's a problem. You give yourself diaper rash. if If you need to slide your ass along the carpet like a dog, you have an issue.
00:45:54
Speaker
That's diaper rash. You know, that's why babies get upset if like they're not cleaned well after they go in their diapers. That's where that comes from. So if you are scratching and rubbing against your chair and doing all this stuff all the time, guess what?
00:46:08
Speaker
You've turned yourself into a literal baby with diaper rash. Deal with your shit. Which, let's be real, if you're not wiping yourself because you think it's a little gay, you're already a big baby. So it's true. You just deserve it.
00:46:20
Speaker
Yeah, I've decided in 2026, I'm going to be like, I don't want to be meaner to people who already feel like the world is mean to them, but they get a lot less slack from me. Like I've learned enough about certain demographics of just awful people where i'm like, I don't think I can reach you in a way that I can reach most others. I still believe kindness is the best way to go, but I'm also much quicker to go on the offensive if somebody is also on the offensive from that side of whatever spectrum we're fucking on right now where I'm little less like, Oh, okay, well let's understand why you think that I'm less likely to try to psychologically break it down and just like, listen here, you fucking like shit sitter, quit it. you know Maybe don't be a piece of shit this year. Huh? Maybe don't be a piece of shit this year. Let's bring it all the way back. Cause no one's no one, no one, regardless of their gender is going to want a 69. You, if you ain't washing your ass, let me tell you that. Trust me. No one wants to go down and do a sewer to do anything. Nobody wants to land on that moon.
00:47:24
Speaker
Yeah.
00:47:30
Speaker
Nobody. Did you say no one wants to land on that moon? Yeah. ah Yeah. yeah um That's a great, that is, man, you got to make that into a shirt.
00:47:47
Speaker
That's fucking great, Danny. Nobody wants to land on that moon. I found my episode title. There you go. I'm glad I could help. Nobody wants. I'm writing it down right now, too. Land on that moon. and i felt I was going to put the word nice after our title, but I usually don't put title number or ah episode title numbers anyway, so I don't need to. Okay.
00:48:15
Speaker
Oh my gosh. That's great. Exactly. Nobody wants, nobody wants to land on that moon. if it's, you don't watch it, nobody's going to want to land on that moon. Wash the moon and you'll get no visitors. You'll get no interest. Not even Kilroy will go there. Kilroy won't even go to that. No, he'll Yeah, he we will cancel his flight.
00:48:34
Speaker
He will cancel his trip. Oh, my gosh. OK, well, what do he say we round this out, Daniel? I think that's a great idea. Thank you all very much for listening. Thank you all for joining us on the super special. Nice episode of That's Our Q or TOQ for short.
00:48:50
Speaker
It has been an absolute pleasure to discuss this with all of you today, and especially you, Adam. It's been an absolute pleasure, as always. I'm glad you're feeling better.
00:49:01
Speaker
You sound pretty good. feel like I'm probably like 95%. ninety five percent Yeah, it sounds like you're on the mend, which is a very good thing. For sure. um And yeah, hey, listen, everybody.
00:49:13
Speaker
Don't be a piece of shit this year. Take care of your mind. take care your hearts. Just don't be a piece of shit. Take care of each other. And once again, cannot stress this enough. Don't be a piece of shit this year. Just don't. Just don't.
00:49:25
Speaker
Just don't.