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With A Penis And A Pulse
3 Plays26 minutes ago
Today we talk about ... crap. I can't remember even what the question was. It's been a long week. Something about sex workers.... Oh yeah, we talk about a lady who did a thing with a dude before she got married or something.
Anyway, say hi to us Also, review us on Podchaser
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Transcript
Introduction and Catching Up
00:00:00
Speaker
And Danny with the intro. Go. Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, everybody inside, outside, upside down, all around the gender binary. This is TOQ, or that's our Q for long. I am a Danny Guarantee, the hostess with the mostest, followed, of course, by the hostess with the other mostest, Adam. Say hello, Adam.
00:00:25
Speaker
Hi. First is the worst. Second is the best. Third is the one with the hairy chest. I always thought it was a treasure chest. I'd prefer that. It's called the big old breast. Ooh, I want that. um And this is where we take your cues and we answer them.
00:00:40
Speaker
Oh, I really thought you were going to go. Oh, I was like, is he gonna? Boom, subverted. You know what I'm proud of you That was pretty good, man. Thank you. That's pretty good.
00:00:51
Speaker
How are you doing, buddy? How was your week? Good week? We've been all right. It's a bit less hectic, but still a little bit of hecticness. Hecticness? Hectically? Hectically? I know you're still doing yeah new new house stuff. New home things, yeah, but it's hopefully calmer for a little while.
00:01:10
Speaker
So, yeah, we'll see. It's never done, so... Yeah, I mean, for sure. i'm I'm very much anticipating more things in this the springtime and the summer to to discover that we still need to do. Yeah, um I mean, even even for me, right before we started this, I had to change a light bulb.
00:01:28
Speaker
It never ends. Yeah, every fucking day, every fuck, every day, another light bulb.
00:01:38
Speaker
Oh, that's good. How about you? How are you doing?
Danny's Relaxing Week and D&D Adventure
00:01:40
Speaker
I'm glad things are coming together. I'm doing pretty good. we're ah We were just taking this week, you know, a nice easy week. We've been dealing with some some sickies and stuff, so... Feeling a little under the weather. So we we were just relaxing a bit this week.
00:01:56
Speaker
Mel still worked. Mbeluga still worked. Ignore what I just said. That's not her name. Don't worry about it. um But yeah, other than that, it's been a fair week, I suppose.
00:02:10
Speaker
Got to hang out with some friends. Oh! Actually, i wanted to tell you about this. so some friends of mine, they wanted to do Some a D&D character thing, right, and to help them learn their characters and and what their characters would be like.
00:02:29
Speaker
They wanted me and umbeluga to help.
00:02:34
Speaker
So they're like, well, we have this like whole tavern built into their basement. awesome Oh, it's amazing. They did an amazing job. And they're like, the the characters we were were trying to learn and figure out all work at this tavern.
00:02:51
Speaker
So we want you guys to come in and kind of just, you know, act out scenarios so that we can go through them as our characters and kind of figure them out a little bit.
00:03:03
Speaker
So that was a lot of fun. We went over there and just, were stupid goofballs for like three hours. And then we all went to K-Pot together. it was fantastic. It was a great day.
00:03:17
Speaker
Oh, good. That sounds like a nice evening. Yeah, it was fun.
Reflecting on Shared Experiences
00:03:22
Speaker
Well, you know, I think now that we've really settled into our, our,
00:03:31
Speaker
our lives together and, and, and, and sharing, I think we should bestow some of our wisdom that we've been able to best hold on to through these moments of trial and through success and harmony and bestow it upon the people who are listening.
00:03:48
Speaker
Right. I, I absolutely agree. And it is because of that, that I picked a very relatable story for us. Mm hmm. Very relatable. Yes. I know you posted it, but I haven't read it yet. So yeah, I read along with you when you say it.
00:04:03
Speaker
All right. You ready?
Dilemma: Revealing a Past Indiscretion?
00:04:06
Speaker
Do relatable. OK. So this is by ah Dull Squash, nine, eight, eight, nine.
00:04:15
Speaker
Dull Squash, what's up? Yep. So good old Dull Squash. And the what do I do subreddit. So they need advice and let's let's help them out. Yeah, let's do it. Do I need to tell my husband about an experience? 41 female, was a nanny for a family for five years when I was 19 to 24 years old.
00:04:38
Speaker
A fantastic family, a boy and a little girl. Never any issues, and I still remain close with the mom. When I was 33, I made a bad decision.
00:04:50
Speaker
I ran into the son, who was then 22 years old, at a bar. It was fun to reconnect and kind of surreal to see the kid in an adult environment. After a couple hours, he whispered to me that it would be hilarious if we kissed.
00:05:06
Speaker
I laughed him off, but long story short, he was very persistent and we did kiss. And in a moment of tipsy bad judgment, I went home to his apartment with him.
00:05:18
Speaker
It was a surreal night to say the least, a very taboo and insane experience. The next morning, we agreed. At my suggestion, never to tell anyone about this.
00:05:29
Speaker
And now I've been invited to his wedding this summer.
Navigating Awkward Wedding Dynamics
00:05:32
Speaker
We've all been there. I'm married now. The incident was before my husband and I met. Do I owe it to my husband to let him know about this since he will be there if we even go?
00:05:46
Speaker
Like i said, totally relatable. Who hasn't been here? Yeah, I was just thinking my dull squash has been in this situation many a time. Dude, I can't even tell you it's why it's so dull.
00:06:00
Speaker
It's so yeah, my doll has been squashed. It's like tarnished at this point. ah it's Tarnished. Tarnished. Um... So, OK, I need to kind of break some things down here so I can.
00:06:13
Speaker
Process this properly. OK, so this woman is 41 now married. 41 and married now. yeah she for five years from to was a nanny for a family um with a boy and a girl.
00:06:30
Speaker
No issues. Remains close. yes Boy 22. She's 33 in this particular memory.
Age Gaps and Past Relationships
00:06:38
Speaker
yeah They reconnect and they have a little one night stand and then agree never to talk about it. And now she and hubby have been invited to nanny boy's wedding that she kissed ah seven years ago.
00:06:54
Speaker
Right. And I guess she's a afraid that either she or the now groom are going to kiss and tell.
00:07:03
Speaker
She. What? Well, it sounds like she's afraid that it's going to come out at the wedding somehow. Right. Oh, no, i i didn't get that. I've been invited to the wedding.
00:07:16
Speaker
married. Why else would I warrantly tell my husband ahead of time? I think she's worried that it'll be awkward that you that that it may come up or that maybe like she's thinking about this thing now. So maybe she'll talk about it.
00:07:30
Speaker
Maybe she'll feel guilty in his presence. It sounds like I don't mean to
Perceptions of Grooming
00:07:35
Speaker
project feelings, but it does sound like.
00:07:39
Speaker
I don't know, like.
00:07:42
Speaker
It feels weird that she thinks like, oh, I should tell this guy about. okay actually, let me backtrack. Let's talk about like the nothing was was done wrong in any sort of illegal manner, though questionable, questionable, in my opinion.
00:07:58
Speaker
You know, you were a nanny for this person. I don't know how old. Let's see if we can figure out how old the boy was. OK, so he's 11 years younger than her if she was 33 and he was 22 at the time. Right.
00:08:11
Speaker
Right. So he would have been. So eight to 15 or eight to 15. Right. Because if she was 19, when she started, that would mean 13 years old eight to 13.
00:08:22
Speaker
Yeah. Right. That makes sense. So if he's eight plus five, 13, right. So he had only just reached teenage years when she finished ah babysitting. That's like the part that I'm having a hard time getting past as far as like before we even get to Trishy, share it or not is like that. Like again, legally she's done nothing wrong, but like it still feels in a way that like a teacher sleeps with a student. You know what I'm saying? Like, yeah, ah there's something about like you said, like obviously legally nothing was done wrong.
00:08:54
Speaker
Yeah. Honestly, even the 11 year age difference at this stage is a big difference. But later on in life, you know, if like a 66 year old and a 55 year old are together, you know, I feel like the older you get, the wider that range can be.
00:09:14
Speaker
Right. I agree. But 11 years is not in and of itself that long. Like, it's not like she's in her 50s and the son was 22.
00:09:25
Speaker
Right. But that's not like where my my negative feeling comes from. It's the relationship you've had with this person. Like, I'm not saying this is what happened.
00:09:38
Speaker
So I'm not trying to put like a a stink on it that we don't know about. But what I'm saying is that it could be inferred. And it's hard not for me to infer this, but like it's very groom ish like to be like, this is a kid who like you helped to raise in some way as a nanny for five years when he was a boy. And you were an adult, but I've been a yeah ah young adult.
00:10:07
Speaker
um I'm not saying like you groomed him to reach out to you, but you ran into this person and then on a whim, he was like, wouldn't it be weird if we just fucked right now? And you were like, yeah, you just did it.
00:10:19
Speaker
Like, it's just I don't know, a man. Like. i just I don't know. I have to disagree. i don't. It feels gross to me. I mean, yes, I do agree with that. I don't get the grooming
Societal Double Standards in Gender Roles
00:10:32
Speaker
vibe, though, because I'm just saying before, if you imagine if it was a dude, if the it the if the genders were swapped, like, no, I get where you're coming from. Yeah, but I don't I'm not getting the grooming thing only because.
00:10:47
Speaker
One, he initiated. Sure. She tried to say no. If we're taking her at her word, which this is all we have. So going to pretend that what she said is what happened. Right.
00:11:02
Speaker
Yeah. Nobody lies on the Internet. I learned that. um And she says, like, I left him off, but he was persistent. And then she got drunk and one thing led to another.
00:11:15
Speaker
So I don't get groomy feelings. I get. Uh, especially, you know, when the kid was probably like 13 and she was 24, he had a crush on his babysitter.
00:11:26
Speaker
Sure. You know, she was a hot older girl. He probably had a crush on her and I don't know, maybe this was, he saw this as his big chance. Yeah, ah I mean, again, I'm not saying it's like a full on grooming situation, because typically that means that there's a meet there's an end to the means. Right.
00:11:45
Speaker
So I don't mean to put that stink on it. But on what I'm saying is like she was the one that should have had control that situation because she's known him for. So I mean, i totally get like, oh, I have a crush on my babysitter. It's this person that's not part of my family.
00:11:57
Speaker
You know, like I get that. I'm sure there's plenty of pornographic videos with that title in it. Oh, I'm sure there is. But I don't know. i just But again, I get that he's persistent and it's like, oh, Teehee, I got. drunk I don't know. It's gross either way. i think it's just I can't help but shake off. the There's a gross stink to it um that.
00:12:19
Speaker
I don't know. I don't know her situation or his, but it is weird to, for me, like, i keep thinking if it were a guy and he's like, yeah, I helped to raise this young girl from when she was eight to 13. Uh, and I was their babysitter and I'm really close with the family. It just feels like a weird thing. Like I'm not just close with the kids. I'm close with the entire family. And then I had an one night stand with one of the,
00:12:42
Speaker
the, that with the son of this family with whom I'm close. You know what I'm saying? Like, ah, it's just, it's, it feels it is weird. It is weird. And like, if that was a guy that did that, like, God string them up by his toes and beat them for a little while. But like, Hey, what are you doing?
00:12:57
Speaker
You know, but just I feel like because it's a woman's like, oh he was persistent and I was drunk. And it's like, sure, I get how guys can be really, you know, I get that. But also, like, typically when you're drunk, you kind of lean into like you lose your inhibitions and you lean into things you probably wanted to do anyway.
00:13:13
Speaker
Again, I'm not trying to shame and let like I don't know who you are. I don't know what your situation is. I don't know how persistent he was or whatever. But it doesn't sound like he was hurting you. It doesn't sound like he was coercing you. Oh, come on. You know, come on. And maybe you wanted to you're like, teehee, no, I'm not.
00:13:28
Speaker
And he was drunk, you were drunk, whatever. But like, I think even if we just take even the age thing out, it's just like the relationship you had with him as a kid and the relationship you have with the family as well.
00:13:39
Speaker
Like that's the that's the thing that's really hanging on me is like. The relationship you had with him as like how you helped to take care of this child. And then his parents, his sister, you said you're close with them now. Right.
00:13:54
Speaker
Like if you're still close with them, that means like this can't be the first time you've seen this guy around. Right. Well, she just said, I remain close with the mom. Oh, did she say the mom?
00:14:04
Speaker
Just the mom. Oh, she did say that. Well, that's even worse. Now I do. I do want to call out a little bit of a double standard here that I don't think is the one you're thinking of. What's that?
00:14:18
Speaker
I'm not going to call out the double standard of yes if you switch the genders, right, that you were saying before. It comes off real bad. I'm going to call you out.
00:14:29
Speaker
That's right. I'm doing this.
00:14:34
Speaker
Are you saying it sounds worse if the genders are swapped because you are subconsciously assuming the guy would enjoy it? Because I'm thinking about it.
00:14:45
Speaker
If this... I literally just reread this to myself with the genders swapped and it was no better or worse to me because no, there's clearly still that like a shame of it bit. Like I didn't want this to happen, but things kind of got out of control because of alcohol and um I regret it.
00:15:06
Speaker
No, I'm coming at it from not from like how they would perceive it. I mean, like just like how society would perceive that. Like if if you were if anybody read this aloud, if we were reading this in front of an audience and we swapped the genders, I bet we'd get more of a reaction if it was a guy doing this and if it was a woman who did. that I can agree to. Yes. Right. That's what I mean. It's like I think that just like there's a natural inclination, but like because unfortunately, you know, we have a lot of just really fucking creepy dudes that do a lot of creepy fucking things all the fucking time.
00:15:36
Speaker
But anyway, you know, but you don't hear as much because like women do it too. And so like, I'm not saying this was an unintended creep thing, but what I'm saying is that if we read this aloud and said it was a guy, in this situation, it would either be like, Oh, gross. Or guys like, yeah, you know, guys probably hearing this now, like a young boy get with an older woman. Oh yeah. Good job, dude. Yeah. You nailed it. Why are you upset?
00:15:57
Speaker
You know? Like, so I don't know. It's just, but I mean, the fact that she's close with the mom, I don't know, man. How do you have that conversation? Clearly it it raises some, some X, right?
00:16:08
Speaker
Right. So let me figure out, does she talk to the husband? Does she talk to the husband? Let's bring it back around to the question hand. Yeah. Well, she told the husband if they're going, if there may be going to this wedding. Right. And like, I needed to kind of break all that down to, cause like, I think that like, it's how, how do you tell the story? Right.
00:16:29
Speaker
For me, I'm like, if you're going to tell your husband, you're, Like, I want to know the motivation. Why would do you feel like you need to tell him that? And if he thinks the way that I think, he might be like, oh honey, that's fucking...
00:16:44
Speaker
That's weird that you did that. You know, I'm not saying your relationship will end, but you might be like, yeah, maybe we don't go. So I think it's like an ethical thing where she's like, should I tell him? Cause we're just going to be there.
00:16:55
Speaker
Does she feel bad about it? Like, why does she feel like all of a sudden she has to tell her husband when really, I think she should start with telling the mom, like, Hey, I fucked your kid. Like, hey, I nailed your kid. Like, I mean, how fucking like again, like just if it's that hard to talk about, then, you know, you probably did something probably, on you know, nefarious, according to like the family. It's like she said she did something taboo.
00:17:20
Speaker
Right. And so. How'd she tell the husband? I don't I don't know, man, like you were you're married,
Should Past Secrets Be Disclosed?
00:17:27
Speaker
right? so if you were able to put yourself in the husband's shoes and Beluga said, Hey, you know, I'm about to go to this dude's wedding. I just wanted you to know that like I used to babysit him as yeah i've probably mentioned, I'm close with his mom when he was 22 and I was 33, we hooked up.
00:17:44
Speaker
And I just want to tell you that they're getting married now. They're happy. You know, obviously nothing more is happening. I'm with you. This is before we met. Like, I just wanted you to know, honestly, it's a, ah in all honesty, I think I would just,
00:18:00
Speaker
I would be like, why are you why are you telling me this? why like It happened before we met. It's not like you cheated on me. right It was a one-night thing that, you know, mistakes happen. Nothing illegal happened. Let's just never bring this up ever.
00:18:19
Speaker
I don't think we would go to the wedding. I'd probably be like, well, you know... It's already kind of weird that you're getting married and you're bringing you're you're inviting your babysitter from 20 years ago or whatever.
00:18:36
Speaker
um or was it 24 to 33? So 11 years ago? or nine years ago? That's a little weird. um yeah I would probably just be like, I just don't think we should go to this one. like You're not that close to the kid anymore.
00:18:55
Speaker
And you have this clearly bothering you. But I don't know. I don't if I were in her shoes, I think I'd just keep my mouth shut. i just wouldn't say anything like it happened again. It happened before they even met. So, no, I don't think you owe it to the husband to tell him about it.
00:19:15
Speaker
It has nothing to do with him because it was before you guys met. Um, as again, as long as you haven't done anything since you've met and got married or anything. Yeah.
00:19:26
Speaker
But like this, I think you're kind of blowing this a little out of proportion. It is weird. It is taboo. That's it is in that respect real bad. But like, this isn't the kind of thing where I think you need to string yourself up on a cross. See, but that's why I'm wondering, like, why you make a good point. And I think maybe that's what I'm trying to get to the.
00:19:48
Speaker
to the bottom of is like, why is this such a big deal? Like, why, why do you feel such guilt? It feels like there's something we're missing here. Right. I feel like there's gotta be more to it. Did he reach out to you recently?
00:20:00
Speaker
Was it more than one time? Is there something else going on? Do you feel like happened with the mom? Like what happened that you feel like, oh no. Cause like you said early at the top of the conversation, maybe something would come out at the wedding, you know, like, i'm like, oh, Hey, and shout out to the woman, ah shout out to nailing the babysitter. And his wife's like, yeah, yeah my, my, my hubby did it. Every man's dream. That's why I fell in love with him. Cause he chased his dreams.
00:20:26
Speaker
I babysat him too. Like, I don't know, man. So like, yeah, I think there's, I definitely feel like there is something missing because you're right. It seems like it's, yeah. Why is she trying to become a martyr?
00:20:40
Speaker
Yeah. ah But I agree with you that if it happened before you were married, you're right. The husband... There are situations where a spell should know something that you did, especially like if there are implications or ramifications that could still be happening, such as a crime, a disease, another relationship that's catching up with you, something like that.
00:21:05
Speaker
But in this particular instance, if he's not particularly close with the mom um and he was, he's not really close with this dude and he doesn't know him and you're like, Oh, let's go to a wedding.
00:21:16
Speaker
Maybe. Yeah. Maybe just don't go man. And just be like now pass and just like focus on just figuring out why you feel so guilty about this and then figure out post wedding. If you still feel like you should talk to him about it, you know?
00:21:30
Speaker
Yeah, I agree. And I like that you touched on the idea of like, You should tell him if this somehow became like a continuous issue that could bleed into your relationship.
Boundaries and Transparency in Relationships
00:21:42
Speaker
Yeah. Like past drug use, you could relapse or if he were still trying to get with you or you still had feelings for him. All these are issues. But this sounds like it's dead and buried already. Like it was a one night thing.
00:21:57
Speaker
You asked to never have it spoken about. It sounds like it's been about nine years and nobody's talked about it, which so, you know. and I'm sorry, but this guy would have to be a complete moron at his wedding to be like, oh, hold on, honey, my new wife. Hey, guys, remember when I slept with the babysitter? Right.
00:22:21
Speaker
Jesus Christ. Speed running your divorce. Yeah, it just feels like. I feel like we're missing something. I feel like. Yeah. Either that or she's she's overreacting.
00:22:34
Speaker
Or what if it's like, oh, okay, I'm just going to tell my husband and the husband goes, oh my gosh, I'm so glad you said that. I've been hooking up with the mom. I hope but before we got married, I was hooking up with the mom and I didn't know that you were the babysitter this whole time. You know, we could have met way sooner when we were younger. Here's the big twist.
00:22:58
Speaker
All right. Her husband is his dad. The kid's dad. I divorced my wife and got with the babysitter. Oh my God. can I mean, I'm sure there's some.
00:23:12
Speaker
I'm sure that's out there somewhere. Twilight Zone. Obviously. Stories like that. um Yeah, yeah. Oh, my. So yeah, long story short, honestly, keep your mouth shut. Just don't go to the wedding. Just you got a good thing. Don't ruin it. Don't try fix what isn't broken.
00:23:33
Speaker
It was a one night bad decision. Sounds like everybody else, you know, nobody knows about it. So let's just move on. Yeah. If you've got nothing else to.
00:23:45
Speaker
Nothing else that's on your mind that is weighing your conscience down, then just don't go to the wedding. Yeah, I think you're right. Just don't go give yourselves. Now, just yeah, here's something. I'm sorry to sidetrack us a little bit, but I want to get your take on something.
00:24:00
Speaker
Hit me. I was looking at the the comments. And a lot of them agree, just don't even go. ah But one person, I'm not even going to name them because... That's weird.
00:24:14
Speaker
Sorry, they're the person that left this, their username has the same numbers in it. But anyway. They said, my wife better not ever take me to a wedding of some guy she slept with. That's not okay.
00:24:28
Speaker
How do you feel about that? I don't think that would be a problem. Like, if... If Beluga was, you know, still friends with like a high school fling or whatever, and.
00:24:42
Speaker
They're like, you know. They're getting married, you know, they're my old friends from high school. And yeah, we slept together in high school like 20 years ago. Yeah, I don't think I'd be all that like upset about it. OK, whatever. Yeah, I think the only way that I could give any sort of credence to that kind of critique is.
00:25:05
Speaker
If I guess it would depend on the proximity to the previous relationship and how it ended. You know, if you're like, oh, let's go to this person's wedding. I'm like, no, you guys broke up like two years ago and it was very toxic and messy. all out It was messy. Like, I don't think that's a good idea for you or for or for them.
00:25:26
Speaker
ah then yeah, I'd be like, no, that's a silly idea. What the fuck are you even trying to suggest it? um But if you're like, yeah, this was a this was from years past and we've been together for how long now? And like, yeah, I think with a good amount of time, like who the fuck cares? Like, just get over it, guy. This is doing like shit.
00:25:44
Speaker
I don't know. Maybe maybe I'm the weird one here, but. I don't care about body counts at all, like. all right, maybe you had like a slutty phase and and slept with a guy every week. Are you still doing that? Like, I'd want to know if right I'm about to get involved with you, if you're still trying to sleep with everything that with a penis and a pulse, but like,
00:26:08
Speaker
up fall but like, if you know, you're like, oh, well, you know, i was in a sorority, things got crazy and I don't give a shit. What's that matter now?
00:26:23
Speaker
I'm not I don't subscribe to the idea that you become like shriveled up and used goods afterwards. Like you're just still the same person. Yeah, i I agree with you. I um actually i don't remember who.
00:26:38
Speaker
i was having this conversation with, but. ah I was having a discussion with someone about would you date someone who works in the sex industry
Dating in the Sex Industry
00:26:48
Speaker
or something like that? And I was just like.
00:26:50
Speaker
yeah Yeah. Like, I mean, like if that's their job, you know, and like or if they did it in the past or if you found out that they were a sex worker at some point, like, yeah, like I mean, like it's it's not infidelity if it's like your job or if that's what you were doing back in the day before. That's a great question.
00:27:10
Speaker
Like, I don't care. Back in the back in the day, I wouldn't care. and if they weren't actively having sex with other people, I don't think I would care.
00:27:20
Speaker
if they still had the job. Like if if they were like, oh yeah, well now I do like, you know, I take pictures of my feet or whatever. mean, yeah, if if they were go for it. I don't care. Yeah, I don't care if it's nudes as long as you don't care. But like, yeah, I do think it would bother me if they were like, oh, by the way, I am a sex worker. I still go out and do, you know, do the do.
00:27:46
Speaker
i'm like, well... I don't know that that that's where it gets me a little bit. And I, I feel like that's one of those things I wouldn't know how it really react until. Yeah, like I think for me, it would be like if it were now ah sex work is a pretty broad category. So I guess if it's like, oh I'm going out on the streets and, you know, making some money, I think I'd be a little more concerned because number one, safety and number for them, but also diseases.
00:28:15
Speaker
But if it was like, Or an industry or if like there are brothels that are very safe and they test all the time and everything. Like, honestly, I think with my stint with like ethical non monogamy, I realized like I don't care about that that much as long as like everyone's being safe and being ah good.
00:28:31
Speaker
Right. Being honest, it doesn't really bother me that much. But yeah, I think if it was just like, oh I'm just going to go and like do my own kind of side gig on the streets or um whatever. Or yeah.
00:28:41
Speaker
But yeah, if I'm just taking pictures, especially pictures, like or if you're doing videos, I couldn't care less about. You got your only you got an OnlyFans. That's f freaking killer, man. You're going to be making so much money. And i get to be with this hot person that the Internet likes to beat it to. Like, that's awesome.
00:28:57
Speaker
i Dude, I would be the guy that's like. if you come to my only fans wife and start hitting on her, I'm just going to start laughing in the back. like Yeah. Like, I think that's freaking killer. I'm going to say, yeah. And I want to make it clear that like, you know, me, me saying like, ah, well, if you're still like in it actively having sex with people, maybe not for me, that is nothing against sex work at all. I, you do you, I don't care. Right. I think nothing more or less of you about it.
00:29:26
Speaker
Um, But yeah, I would just be laughing if somebody just thinking about it. i find It's so funny. Like, yeah, bro, shoot your shot. You got this. Yeah, I mean, yeah, it's.
00:29:41
Speaker
i don't know, man. Some people just have no shame. But also thinking of, you know, you you've met my wife, thinking of her being like, this is just.
00:29:52
Speaker
Oh, yeah. being Being in the business, being in the business, having random dudes. um trying to flirt with her and stuff. She would be freaking funny. I can say she would not be having, she would not like that.
00:30:07
Speaker
be Like, um, actually it's only Dan's attention. I don't want attention though. Yeah. It's only Dan's not only fans. You got the wrong. Yeah. yeah Sign up for my only dance.
00:30:17
Speaker
Uh, but only if your name is Dan. Right. That's why it's only dance. That's why it's only dance. Yeah, it's there's nothing sexual about it. Actually, i tried we just kind of discuss having the name Dan. I tried to get in with my last name, with my middle name, Donald. And I called myself Don and I got caught. and nathan Oh, yeah. No, he even tried to use like a font that made the O's and A's look kind of similar. was really trying to get. crack I tried to even use wingdings at one point, but they cracked it. No, we knew we know that trick. Come on. ah Yeah, it was really upsetting.
00:30:45
Speaker
So. It really is only for dance. Yeah, we have really good moderators. ah They're all named Dan. yeah Right. of course Obviously, we really weren't.
00:30:59
Speaker
ah Yeah. Now, what if it's what if you're a woman and your name is Danielle and you go by Dan? That's fine. Yeah, yeah we we do allow Danielle's Danny's with the eye. That's fine. OK, cool. Yeah. Any any variation.
00:31:16
Speaker
OK, well, I appreciate that you guys are so open and accepting. Oh, absolutely. Yeah, we don't care about like gender or any of that. Just as long as your name is Dan in some way. You're good. You're fine.
00:31:28
Speaker
OK, no. um So before we wrap up, I wanted to I was I if I could put us on a different tangent.
00:31:39
Speaker
Always. I.
First Movie Theater Experiences
00:31:43
Speaker
You know, at work, we do these things called of like icebreakers, as you do in meetings to kind of get conversation started. And we started doing like a new tradition in my little three person department. Every Monday morning, we do a like we rotate who gets to do the icebreaker. It's usually like these little just fun little. Oh, what was your best Christmas memory or what's your favorite? Blah, blah, blah.
00:32:04
Speaker
And the one I came up with that had some pretty good discussion that I was curious to get your answer on was um about movie theaters and your first experience at one. And was curious, do you remember the first time that you went to a movie theater? And if so, do you remember what movie it was?
00:32:25
Speaker
I hell no. Really? i i don't remember what movie it would have been at all. I do remember I saw
00:32:39
Speaker
was it there's a town in new jersey called denellan and they had a drive-in theater that we went to once and that was really cool we saw a movie and drive in drive-in yeah um i didn't go to a drive-in until i was in my late 20s i didn't even know they were still around yeah this this was a while ago and i'm positive it's not there anymore but That was really cool.
00:33:05
Speaker
Oh, man. earliest movie It interesting I'm trying to think where I'd even have gone. i probably just went to the mall. Did you go in high school?
00:33:16
Speaker
No, it was probably earlier than that. Interesting. Oh, boy. Really? You can't remember your first movie? i fight Man, everybody I asked at work like immediately had an answer. there It was like their first I can barely remember what I had for breakfast most mornings.
00:33:31
Speaker
And my long term is not any better. I remember I can't remember which one was first, but I remember to the first two movies I saw in theaters that which was eight legged freaks.
00:33:45
Speaker
ah stay Starring David Arquette, which was, i think, supposed to be a horror movie, but turned out to be kind of like a funny, campy horror movie. um And then the other one was Super Troopers.
00:33:59
Speaker
And I think I was in ninth or 10th grade. I remember going to see the thing I most remember about like this whole experience was really funny because the theater that we went to from my small town, we had to drive up to like ah a different town, to even get close to a theater.
00:34:16
Speaker
But when I was a kid, I would always see these previews from movies that I thought looked so fun. I'd say, mom and dad, can we go? And I said, there's no theaters in Pennsylvania. There's no movie theaters anywhere near us. No, no one. and funny thing is, though, we went up to this thing. They call it a big Kmart. I don't know if you guys had them in your state, but we had big Kmart, which was essentially a Kmart that was also built into a big mall.
00:34:40
Speaker
And so the Kmart was the big part of the mall. It was a very shitty little. No, we didn't have that. We we had Kmart, but not this big Kmart. No. Yeah, Big Kmart was just like, it's Kmart, but with the mall. Okay, great. Just what I want, more Kmart.
00:34:54
Speaker
Which was like weird because like the mall itself is very pitiful and only had like a Little Caesars and something else in it, and that was the mall. But um but on the other side of the big Kmart was, in fact, a movie theater that I ended up going to. And I would see the movies written on the fucking marquee every time we pulled up to big Kmart to go shop.
00:35:14
Speaker
But because the outside of the theater had like the pictures of like the happy mask and the frowny mask that you usually see for like like a play. I thought that that was like theater. was like, oh, these must be like local productions for something.
00:35:30
Speaker
So I remember and never thinking anything of it. And then I'll never forget when my buddy Chris was like, Hey man, uh, for my birthday, i want to go to the movies. Do you want to come? And I was like, yeah, but like where, how, how far do we have to drive? Like, you know, where is it? And what state?
00:35:46
Speaker
And he was like, Indiana. And i was like, we have to go all the way to Indiana. And he goes, no, Indiana PA. And i was like, oh yeah, we go to Indiana PA all the time. And he's like, yeah, there's a theater up there near the the mall.
00:35:58
Speaker
was like, what are you talking about? So we roll up and fucking walk right into the front doors. it It was a very small theater. It only showed four movies. That was all I had in it. um And I remember being like feeling so betrayed by my parents.
00:36:14
Speaker
who I don't know if they themselves had ever been in a movie theater. And if they didn't know that was a theater or if they genuinely just never want us to go to a movie. So don't remember telling them about it or not, but I remember going there and being so angry that there's been a theater there this whole time. And my parents refused to take me to a movie.
00:36:33
Speaker
um but But, but the reason I remember super trooper so well was not only was it, And still is one of my favorite movies. And it doesn't hold up in some parts. i'm not going to lie. But like, it just holds a special spot in my heart because of like it being one of the first things I got to see.
00:36:51
Speaker
But I was just getting over a really terrible pneumonia, like awful, like just fucking just devastating pneumonia. And so I still had this really bad cough that would just when it came on, it was bad. But like I could go for hours without coughing.
00:37:07
Speaker
And I remember being in the theater. Especially during, have you seen super troopers? No, I have not. Oh man. There's a, it's about these just state troopers that just like get up to a lot of shenanigans and eventually they do like a drug bust and stuff. And there's like some local corruption, but it's very funny. It's very silly.
00:37:25
Speaker
But, and they play these games when they pull people over cause they pull people over as a partnership. So there's always two in the car and they always ask, what game do you want to play when we approach the car?
00:37:36
Speaker
And the one one they call repeat the other one they call like meow. And they challenge it's like, hey, i need I want to see as you talk to these guys about why they were speeding, if you can say the word meow 10 times.
00:37:47
Speaker
And so he'll be like, you stop laughing right meow. All right, meow. And just went meow in random places. And it's very funny. And like, I don't know why in that moment, my little teenager brain was like,
00:37:59
Speaker
dying of laughter and i was coughing so loud through my laughs that i had people checking on me and someone put out a flashlight and looked at me to make sure i was okay chris and his mom were like dude to you all right i was disrupting that whole movie theater laughing at this meow scene in super troopers and it's just seared into my brain it just been like it's my first time in the theater and i'm fucking meow ah And it just holds a very special spot in my heart because I've never felt like I was going to die while laughing before. But that was like the closest I've gotten.
00:38:35
Speaker
When someone said I died laughing, I was like, I almost died. I understand your pain. Yeah. My chest hurts so bad. My throat hurts so bad from coughing and laughing. but I just could. I was crying and I couldn't tell if it was because i was in pain or because I was laughing through tears or both.
00:38:53
Speaker
But man, what an experience and what a great movie. OK. All right. i i No, there's no way I saw that in theaters. And I'm looking at.
00:39:03
Speaker
I'm looking at a bunch of movies released between 1990 and 2000. Oh, is that darkness falls? And so far the earliest one on this list I remember is seeing, think I went to go see Jurassic park in 93.
00:39:24
Speaker
Really? Wow. That far ago. Yeah, I think I think my parents really wanted to see it. So they brought me along. You must have been like what? Like three or four. was four. i definitely saw the Matrix.
00:39:38
Speaker
I definitely saw the mummy. You saw mummy in theaters. Oh, yeah. Damn, you were at the theater way younger than me. We were. We used to go to the movies a lot. I think I saw Independence Day in theater, too, in 96. Oh, that's awesome.
00:39:54
Speaker
We used to go a lot. What a killer movie, too. Oh. I didn't see the new one. I also, I seem to remember, I don't know what year this one came out. Let me see. But um I'm pretty sure I saw Small Soldiers in theaters, too. Oh, shit. What a throwback.
00:40:10
Speaker
Yeah, I've I love that. Small Soldiers? Small Soldiers was like one of my movies as a kid. Wow. It was 98. OK, yeah, that makes sense. i I loved Small Soldiers.
00:40:24
Speaker
Yeah, that's that's the one of the toys that we're fighting, right? hele Yes. Yeah, the toys are fighting. Yeah, they were. I can't remember because it was like the kind of buzz cut looking. it was it was the army versus aliens. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But the alien aliens were the good guy. And. um Oh, God, the bait, like, look, this movie is like 30 years old. All right. Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:40:50
Speaker
But and I don't even think this is a ah spoiler, but. um The military accidentally put like military grade chips in these toys. And that was how it was. That's how it was. Yeah.
00:41:04
Speaker
Oh, I don't remember that. Oh, Jumanji. Did I see Jumanji in theaters? I definitely didn't see that theaters. I don't remember if I saw that in theaters or not. I don't even remember seeing. movie Oh, my God. Seeing all these movies again. Oh, speed. Oh, what a great movie.
00:41:23
Speaker
It was Armageddon. i wrote I know for a fact I saw Armageddon in theaters because I didn't know what. What Armageddon meant? Yeah.
00:41:35
Speaker
What was that? That was 98. I was nine years old. So I misheard it as Armageddon. this I think. And I was like playing pretend after that and I'd be like, armor, get on Yeah. that great It's like summoning your armor to your body. the armor Get on. al Get on That's incredible. I love that. armor Get on. d armor Get on. It's fucking awesome.
00:42:04
Speaker
Hercules. ah Did I see Hercules? Get out of here. great. oh man it was great Men in Black I saw in theater.
00:42:15
Speaker
how much to like to all these movies. Shit. Oh, dude. Yeah, we went a lot. Yeah. No, it's funny, though, is like after I found out that there was a theater out there, I found out there was another theater in another place we go shopping in a place called Greensburg.
00:42:30
Speaker
And they had an even bigger mall over there in a theater near there. And it had way more movies in it. And So then I started going there for all of my movie needs. And then I found out there was another one and there was theaters everywhere. And then when I started dating in around like 10th grade, my girlfriend and I would go see movies all the time. And then I was like, how could you guys not?
00:42:55
Speaker
We know about this. When I lived with my parents, we lived about five minutes from a theater and AMC. Oh, wow. Yeah.
00:43:07
Speaker
So like we would go. Whenever a movie looked cool, that was like our family time. You know, we'd go to to the mall, we'd shop a bit at a movie, hit up a movie.
00:43:19
Speaker
Oh, man, that sounds wonderful. My family, we didn't really do family time, so I'm very envious of that. But I'm glad I get to do that now. Yeah, it was a lot of fun. It was good.
00:43:31
Speaker
Well, good job, Terry. Good job. See, Mom, abe I can't wait for my mom to be like, Dan, you fool. You didn't see any of those in theater. This was the first movie you went and saw in theaters.
00:43:42
Speaker
We actually um actually when you were still in the womb, I but actually child play actually, you know, it's funny you ask about seeing your first movie and remembering movies ah because just today. Beluga and I were watching something and they talked about Like, what was the movie or, you know, what was what was the story behind your first kiss?
Memories of First Kisses
00:44:08
Speaker
m And we both remember that it was right after a movie in my car in the parking lot of the mall. But neither of us can remember what movie we saw. Wow.
00:44:23
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. No idea. Couldn't tell you. It wasn't about the movie. That's why I don't care. I probably spent half of that movie being like nervous as fuck to to finally ask her out, even though I knew she liked me already.
00:44:41
Speaker
Oh, you didn't even ask her out as like a date. So what happened was. We met at work, right at like a summer job.
00:44:52
Speaker
And I had just gotten off of a huge. like devastating breakup. Right. i remember. And we hit it off basically immediately.
00:45:04
Speaker
And I told her like, you know, I'm really sorry, but I don't want a girlfriend right now. I really need to focus on myself. but but but but but but And after a month of that, we, we would still go out and do things, you know, but finally that was the one where I was like, I'm ready. I think this is finally time to stop.
00:45:26
Speaker
stringing her along and being a jerk and finally actually let her out. She came in and now she's looking at me. Hi, honey. I'm listening to the story. So that's when I decided like, hey, I should probably, you know, put my money where my mouth is and finally ask her out.
00:45:41
Speaker
Don't you mean put your mouth where her mouth is? Yeah, sorry. Put my mouth where her mouth is. Yeah. Like a kiss? Yeah, we're talking about our first kiss and how neither of us can remember the movie we saw.
00:45:54
Speaker
Do you remember the first movie you saw in theaters? Like, ever? Yeah. No. Really? Yeah, she doesn't either. don't know. Adam and a bunch of people Adam works with do.
00:46:09
Speaker
And that's weird to me.
00:46:13
Speaker
So I've been looking at a bunch of 90s movies and, like, reminiscing. Because that's the show. I remember seeing... Because I'm old. earliest movie memories i have is seeing scorpion king with my dad in theater scorpion scorpion king but i don't remember if i saw anything in theaters before that as like a wee little kid oh well i'll take i don't know if you saw something as a wee little type was that scorpion king
00:46:44
Speaker
Yes. I mean, that was probably what, late 90s? Because then the mummy come out like early to mid 90s. Or was that 2000s? I can't remember. When the fuck this corp came out? 2002. It was early 2000s. OK.
00:46:58
Speaker
When the fuck did the mummy come out? Was that late In the theaters. May 29th. The mummy. The mummy was 99. I was 99. Oh, I got my. You want to see what movies came out on your birthday? no on our the day that you asked me out i don't know what movies were in the theater you remember the day the same day we got married you idiot right i was smart i did that on purpose fucking god uh you got married on the same day of your first kiss but you can't figure out what movies are out then 2010
00:47:36
Speaker
twenty ten 2010. OK. All right. We're going figure this out, gang. Listen up, audience. You're here for the ride now. We're figuring it out. We're going to figure out if not. We're not going to know what Danny's first movie was. We're going to know. but We're going to figure this out.
00:47:51
Speaker
We want to know what movie got them all horned up to kiss in the car. That's right. Yes. definite I bet you was no country for old. men All right. Let's say. Yeah, definitely. Domestic box office for May 29, 2010.
00:48:05
Speaker
All right. Shrek forever after. Was that it? No. It might have been Iron Man 2. It might have been Iron Man. know we saw an Iron Man movie.
00:48:16
Speaker
That was pretty big. I mean, the movie itself wasn't that good. I don't think it was How to Train Your Dragon. Really? It seems like a movie. it's like I remember like movies we saw outside of that day. i don't remember the specific movie we saw. I'm surprised some of these movies were out at the same time.
00:48:35
Speaker
I had no idea that that um how to train your dragon and Shudder Island and Avatar were all the same yeah same time. Like the main the the blue people Avatar.
00:48:48
Speaker
Yeah. You guys didn't go see that. I mean, we did. I just don't know if that was the movie we finally I bet you it was Iron Man, too. And that guy, I think I think it was Iron Man, too. I'm pretty sure it was.
00:49:03
Speaker
I'm pretty sure we saw an Iron Man movie and that fits right in there. So, man, that got your Iron Man. Yeah, she got my Iron Man. I don't have my I don't know where my scrapbook is of tickets to know. Oh, yeah. Mel used to Mbalugi used to keep a scrapbook of all the movie tickets we used to get. Yeah, well, maybe you got to see if Iron Man 2 is in there if you find it. we'll pop I'll upload some pictures on Instagram of the ticket.
00:49:34
Speaker
If you find them. If you have it. that is I mean, we i'm sure we still have it, but God knows where it is. and now they're on we We had to stop doing it because movies are all like, we we started getting the tickets online before the movie.
00:49:48
Speaker
You don't get like an actual ticket anymore. It's bullshit. It's like mail-in voting. I should still get a sticker, damn it. an I voted sticker. Yeah. You mailed it in and they just mail you back a single sticker.
00:50:02
Speaker
I want a sticker.
00:50:07
Speaker
think it's bullshit. I'm giving the postal worker something to do. I'm paying postage. um You know, I'm doing where my sticker and yeah and and voting with my voice.
00:50:23
Speaker
And the least you can do is mail me a sticker back or, you know, send me an email and say, hey, show up with this voucher for a free sticker and I'm going to come get one.
00:50:35
Speaker
But I feel like if I mailed in, voted, I can't go to the polls and get a sticker. It's like, why didn't you just vote here? I'm like, because I don't want to wait out in the goddamn cold to fucking vote. It's cold out there and crazy people go to the polls. I'd rather just do it. Just stay on where it's safe.
00:50:51
Speaker
Yeah. And I want a sticker. It's bullshit. God. I'm going to make a sticker that says I mail i did mail in voting and wanted a sticker and this is it. So, P.S., I voted. Why don't you make that a shirt?
00:51:05
Speaker
yeah Yeah, go to fundusallersnetwork.biz and check out the store. We have some great shirts on there, one of which is Bucket. So check out the Bucket shirt. It is Bucket.
00:51:16
Speaker
You'll never guess what's on that shirt. You'll never guess what's on the shirt. ah We'd really appreciate it. Please let us know if you like it and if it shows up well. And if it doesn't, then we'll do better. Also, just shout out to my buddy, Smosis, who has his own little store, the Smosis Emporium.
00:51:32
Speaker
I don't know what the website is yet because I want to put on the website for us. And we're still figuring out. on it But he does cool little things over there. Go check out my buddy. Yeah, he's gotten a few sales now. He was very excited about and we're all very proud of him. He's been making what are those cards called? the They're like, yeah, they're they're like custom like homemade trading card game cards.
00:51:53
Speaker
Yeah, they're like, yeah, I can't remember, but I guess like they're not. They're not. Licensed ones or whatever, they're just, yeah, there's a name for it, but I can't remember what don't remember. And he's making real nice ones on his computer and telling people to really like them.
00:52:08
Speaker
I didn't remember what it's for. Was it for game? but game Fuck, I don't know anything. I'm a bad friend. Adrian, let us know what it is. i can't remember, buddy, but just look up some Moses Emporium on Instagram and then his links in in there. So do that.
00:52:24
Speaker
Yeah, I'm trying to find the name real quick. I know for the fuck of me. I can't remember right now. um It's going to bother me now. He deserves it. He deserves like a good shout out.
00:52:39
Speaker
Where does he put it? Does he put in the general chat? Now I can't remember. Yeah, geez. Oh, God. What would I even be under? Was it positivity square? You know what? Was it COMC?
00:52:54
Speaker
Comc? Was it conch? COMC? don't know what you're talking about. Supported trading cards? No. I don't know. All I know is that I'm very proud. Riftbound? Was that it?
00:53:07
Speaker
Might be.
00:53:11
Speaker
I think that might have been it. I don't know. If you know, tell us by going to funsolarsnetwork.biz and leaving a comment or or leave a comment on any ah wherever you heard this um and leave some stars too. And tell me that I sounded nice today because I could use a compliment from somebody other than Adam.
00:53:34
Speaker
Really? i am a compliment or thank you very much. Are you really? No, was going to say, i don't think that sounds true.
00:53:44
Speaker
I'm not, but I want people to comment and I want them to say nice things. All right, well we'll do that. If you want to make Danny feel good about himself, then, you know. Oh, before I forget, because we did forget this last last episode.
Conclusion and Life Advice
00:54:02
Speaker
Maybe just maybe listener. Oh, yeah. Maybe just something they shouldn't do. Just a chance. You know, just maybe. Just maybe.
00:54:14
Speaker
for You're right. Don't ah be a piece of shit this year. Yeah. Maybe just don't be a piece of shit. You know, if you look yourself in the mirror and you think, you know, I feel like being a piece of shit.
00:54:26
Speaker
Don't. Don't. don't If there's that one small to your small part in the back of your brain that goes like, hey, that thing I'm doing. That feels like a piece of shit move. Maybe I shouldn't do that. Listen to that bit.
00:54:38
Speaker
All right, stop kicking that puppy. It's a piece of shit move. And just maybe don't be a piece of shit this year. Maybe if you're if you're in ah if you're in a spot and you're like, ah, man, I really should be a piece of shit. It's like...
00:54:54
Speaker
Don't man. Yeah. Even, even if you're sitting there like, man, that guy, that guy over there, he's being a real piece of shit. I should probably like be a piece of shit to him. It's deserved. Right? No.
00:55:06
Speaker
Being a bigger piece of shit. Two wrongs do not make a right. All right. You need to show him this episode and be like, Hey man, just listen to like the 55 minute Mark, you know? And, and here's me talking to that guy right now.
00:55:20
Speaker
Plus this Steve, Steve, Steve, Steve, mon Steve, listen don't be a piece of shit this year. don Don't be a piece of shit. All right, Steve. Two wrongs. Don't make a shit. You know, like yeah. but be shit It's here.
00:55:34
Speaker
Just just maybe don't be a piece of shit, Steve. Maybe a listen for for the last time. do not just don't. All right. Just don't. Just don't. It's not that hard. I promise.
00:55:47
Speaker
This like the toughest fucking thing. It makes me so happy and I don't know why.
00:55:58
Speaker
Oh, God.
00:56:02
Speaker
10 whole fucking minutes of just sitting there. Could you imagine just an episode of just sitting there going, just don't. Just don't be a piece shit. just Don't be a piece of shit this year.
00:56:14
Speaker
Oh my god. Yeah, but seriously, though' don't be piece of shit. don't be a piece of shit this year. Stop it.