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For Those who suck at Setting Goals
73 Plays1 year ago
Are you terrible at writing down what you want to achieve? Me too! I shut down and clam up when I have to hold myself accountable. Here's a few tricks I've picked up so I don't claw out my own eyeballs every time I think about goals. It's a new year. What a time to practice what we preach.
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Find Alex:
Website: https://www.hoopercomedy.com/
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https://www.facebook.com/alex.hooper.334/
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Transcript
Introduction and Reflection on Podcasting
00:00:01
Speaker
Big week, everybody, and I will get to why in just a couple of minutes.
00:00:08
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But first, welcome back to Dirty Briefs, episode 51.
00:00:13
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Yeah, we're almost at a whole year of this podcast.
00:00:18
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Have you listened to all of them?
00:00:19
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Some of them?
00:00:21
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None of them?
00:00:22
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Whatever it is, I am so glad you're here.
00:00:24
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My name's Alex Hooper, and...
Struggles with Goal Setting
00:00:27
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It is the second week of 2024, and because of that, I want to talk about goal setting.
00:00:36
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Something I suck at.
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Yes, I am admitting it.
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I am being vulnerable.
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I am terrible at setting goals.
00:00:45
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In fact, a few days ago, I sat down with my wife to talk about what I wanted to accomplish in 2024.
00:00:55
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And the first thing I said was, well, I want to be the best comedian I can be.
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And she said, well, that's not specific enough.
00:01:04
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And I said, okay, I want to sell out comedy clubs all over the country.
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And she said, okay, well, how are you going to do that?
Realization and Need for Specific Goals
00:01:14
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And then I said, well, I also want to write a book.
00:01:18
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And she said, is that the most important thing that you want to accomplish this year?
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So basically...
00:01:27
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goal that I had, she had a response to that, I will just let you know, made me shut down, want to run away, want to crawl into the deepest parts of myself and just go to sleep.
00:01:44
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I struggle with this because anytime...
00:01:49
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somebody asked me about my goals and about specificity, I don't really know what to say because I don't know how to do that.
00:01:58
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I admit for years, I have been throwing spaghetti against the wall, hoping it sticks, but not even cooking it.
00:02:07
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I'm working hard, but not working smart.
00:02:12
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And I
00:02:13
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I want to get out of my own stubborn ways.
00:02:16
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I want to change my habits and I know I can.
00:02:20
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It's that feeling I get when I'm doing something new and scary, when I know it's going to take work and I just want to pack up all my shit and just dig myself out of it and just shut down.
Understanding SMART Goals
00:02:34
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But I can't do that.
00:02:36
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I understand that my goals are too vague and that is a pitfall that a lot of people fall into because how do you accomplish a goal if you can't even say how you're going to get to the goal?
00:02:52
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A friend of mine just taught me about an acronym for goal setting.
00:02:56
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And it's SMART.
00:02:58
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S-M-A-R-T.
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S, specific.
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M, measurable.
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A, attainable.
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R, relevant.
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T, time bound.
00:03:12
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Specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, time bound.
00:03:16
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SMART.
00:03:17
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And that's when I realized, wow, none of what I just said
00:03:21
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can fit into any of those categories.
00:03:24
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Except for attainable, like a couple of them, maybe, but I need to figure out how I'm going to do that.
Daily Practices for Goal Achievement
00:03:32
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So, what I'm doing each day is I'm whittling them down.
00:03:38
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I realize that
00:03:40
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Maybe I don't have a specific goal or actions to get there.
00:03:45
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But when I'm in my meditations, when I'm doing my morning pages, one of the things I'm doing is I'm writing down little things that I can do each day.
00:03:55
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I journal every day.
00:03:56
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Last year, I journaled over 300 pages.
00:03:58
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That was a great thing.
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So this year I said, great.
00:04:01
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Let's journal at least another 300 pages.
00:04:04
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That's one goal.
00:04:05
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But at the bottom of each page, what I'm doing is I'm saying, okay, well, what do you need to do today?
00:04:10
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Oh, I want to sell out my show at the improv.
00:04:13
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So I'm going to text 25 people individually with personalized messages, telling them that it's happening because they're not always going to see what it is on social media.
00:04:23
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What else do I need to do?
00:04:24
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Oh, I'm going to text 25 people.
00:04:26
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I need to contact my producer and director about the special taping next week to make sure there's nothing else I can do in that regard.
00:04:34
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What else do I need to do?
00:04:36
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I need to film and upload a dirty brief.
00:04:38
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I need to edit a standup clip.
00:04:40
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These are all little things that I can do.
00:04:44
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And as I check each one off the list, it makes me feel a little bit better.
00:04:50
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And hopefully, slowly but surely, by doing this,
00:04:55
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it will lead to my goals being smart, specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, time bound.
Impact of Small Decisions
00:05:07
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With every action I make, I try to think to myself, is this nudging me closer to what I want, to the life I want to live?
00:05:20
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A few years ago, you know I love self-help books.
00:05:23
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I read a self-help book that I really, really, it spoke to me.
00:05:30
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It was called The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson.
00:05:33
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And essentially, the concept behind The Slight Edge is that with every decision we make, we are either ticking up or ticking down.
00:05:41
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And at the beginning of a timeline, the people that are ticking up with every single choice they make and the people that are ticking down, you don't really notice anything.
00:05:50
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They're both staying here.
00:05:51
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But eventually, the people that are making good decisions are going to start going this way.
00:05:57
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The people who are not making good decisions are going to start going this way.
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that way.
00:06:00
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And so eventually what starts as an even plane is going to get bigger and bigger and bigger in the gap.
00:06:08
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So what I'm trying to tell myself and what I urge you to tell yourself with every decision you make, is this getting me closer to my goal?
Balancing Goals with Leisure
00:06:19
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Now, that doesn't mean you can't fuck off.
00:06:21
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That doesn't mean you can't eat a giant hamburger instead of a salad.
00:06:25
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It doesn't mean you can't go to the movies instead of writing up a business proposal.
00:06:30
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You can do those things.
00:06:31
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You need to do those things.
00:06:33
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Sometimes you got to give yourself a break.
00:06:35
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But overall, are the decisions you're making getting you closer to what you want?
00:06:44
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Maybe I don't have a clear goal.
00:06:46
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Maybe you don't.
00:06:47
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But one thing I'm asking myself every day, am I a little bit better than I was yesterday?
00:06:53
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Am I taking the time to take care of my body, my mind, my soul?
00:06:59
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Am I doing things that push me out of my comfort zone?
00:07:05
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I feel like last year was my recovery year.
00:07:08
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I was all about bouncing back.
00:07:10
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Well, this year is about leaping forward.
00:07:12
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That's what I named my journal, Leap Forward.
00:07:14
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And when I had this conversation with my wife,
00:07:17
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I got scared because suddenly I was like, am I just floating and waiting for things to happen to me?
00:07:25
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Am I thinking about all a magical, am I magically thinking, waiting for someone else to give me the opportunity because I've worked so hard over the years.
00:07:36
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I've been so nice to people.
00:07:38
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Won't my talent shine through?
00:07:40
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Why won't people validate me?
00:07:43
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Please.
00:07:45
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That's not going to get me anywhere.
00:07:47
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Action is what will get me somewhere.
00:07:49
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Little tiny things.
00:07:52
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Doing this podcast is an action that I have taken for almost a full year.
00:08:00
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And the fact that you're here listening to it shows that it's working.
00:08:04
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It's allowing me to do something.
00:08:07
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It's forcing me to be creative, to create it, release it, stop giving a fuck.
00:08:15
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Is this getting me closer to what I want?
00:08:20
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I hope so.
00:08:23
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I think it is.
00:08:24
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Slowly but surely, every little step I take.
Commitment to Self-Improvement
00:08:32
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Whether it's going for a walk instead of laying on the couch or
00:08:37
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Doing a few pushups every single day.
00:08:40
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Choosing to listen to my sets in my stand-up every single day so I can prepare myself, so I can write new jokes, so I can refine what I'm doing, so I can be the best version of myself.
00:08:53
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Because I know you feel the same way.
00:08:57
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You want to be the best version of yourself.
00:08:59
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It's easy to be a piece of shit.
00:09:02
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I know.
00:09:03
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We fall into these habits and it's so fucking simple because it demands that we just crawl deeper into the hole.
00:09:15
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But get a little uncomfortable.
00:09:17
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Surprise yourself because that's what's going to make you feel better.
00:09:20
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And if you write down a couple things every day and then you do them and you can check them off the list, you're going to feel a lot better.
Career Milestones Announcement
00:09:30
Speaker
Now, this is a big week, everybody.
00:09:34
Speaker
This week, I am taping my special at the Bijou Theater in Bridgeport, Connecticut.
00:09:40
Speaker
January 12th, Friday.
00:09:41
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Two shows, a 7 and a 9.30.
00:09:46
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So, tickets are available.
00:09:48
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Please go get them.
00:09:50
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We're going to fill that place up.
00:09:51
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This is big, everybody.
00:09:53
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This is a huge moment for me.
00:09:56
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This is me trying to tick up in the right direction.
00:09:59
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This is going to propel me to that next level.
00:10:02
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Also, this Wednesday, January 10th, McGubbies in Baltimore.
00:10:06
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That's my final performance before I tape the special.
00:10:09
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And that's my hometown.
00:10:10
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So I expect to sell really well there.
00:10:13
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And I'm excited to play this new club.
00:10:15
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One of my goals this year, play five new clubs.
00:10:17
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Well, that's one right there.
Closing Motivation and Personal Growth
00:10:20
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I've never played in Connecticut.
00:10:22
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There's another state checked off my list.
00:10:24
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These are things that are adding to my soul.
00:10:29
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What are you going to do for yourself?
00:10:32
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It is a new year and you can decide which way you want to go.
00:10:37
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Tick up or tick down.
00:10:42
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One way you will ascend.
00:10:44
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The other way you're eventually going to crash.
00:10:46
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So make that choice, everybody.
00:10:49
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Gosh, I'm so happy to be here with you.
00:10:51
Speaker
Thanks for listening.
00:10:53
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I love you.