Transcript
Speaker: Welcome back to Dirty Briefs, everybody, on this beautiful February day.
Speaker: I have to talk about something that happened last night at one of my shows.
Speaker: As you know, if you've been listening to this, I've been producing a show at the Comedy Store called Perfect Dose.
Speaker: And last night was our third edition of the event.
Speaker: The first two were great.
Speaker: We've had stellar lineups, killer special guests, and great crowds.
Speaker: So last night, we expected no different at all.
Speaker: But something happened.
Speaker: That was very, very unexpected.
Speaker: So we picked four comics to go up on our show.
Speaker: We picked them ahead of time and we have a lineup set up.
Speaker: Everyone knows who's going on the show.
Speaker: However, then we put up a couple of comics the day of that either work at the comedy store or that we just want to see do a couple of minutes just to kind of fluff the audience a little bit.
Speaker: Now, a friend of mine took this spot last night.
Speaker: It's called the Cold Open.
Speaker: They go up there to welcome the crowd, say, hi, you're at the comedy store.
Speaker: We hope you have a great time.
Speaker: Here's a few jokes to get you in the laughing spirit before the other comedians come up and truly break down your walls.
Speaker: My friend Taylor Boss, who I've known for many, many years since I've started, love this dude, he took that cold open last night and he talked about being in a mental institution against his will about 10 years ago.
Speaker: This is Taylor's story, his real life story, and he made it extremely funny.
Speaker: The audience was laughing.
Speaker: It wasn't like breakout, like, oh my God, I'm on the floor.
Speaker: Please stop.
Speaker: My sides are busting.
Speaker: But they were getting in the mood to laugh and he was cracking them open by telling a very honest story from his own life about being in a mental institution.
Speaker: He does five minutes.
Speaker: Then he calls myself and my co-host Jerry Brandt to the stage.
Speaker: Jerry and I get on stage and the first thing I said was, hey, how about that one man rendition of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, everybody?
Speaker: Gets a good reaction from the audience.
Speaker: Jerry says, yeah, I thought that was great.
Speaker: I didn't know they were allowed to play Pictionary in mental institutions.
Speaker: Again, good laugh from the audience.
Speaker: And I said, yeah, honestly, I'm amazed they're allowed to have pencils.
Speaker: That seems like a weapon.
Speaker: Great laugh from the audience.
Speaker: Suddenly this woman in the front row just goes, stop, stop, please.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: And I was like, excuse me, miss Jerry and I put our attention towards a person who clearly is not enjoying herself.
Speaker: And we have been on stage forever.
Speaker: 30 seconds.
Speaker: 30 seconds.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: We're at the very beginning of this show.
Speaker: So we need to squash and deal with whatever is happening right now.
Speaker: And she just goes, it's not funny.
Speaker: It's not funny.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: We clearly have upset this person.
Speaker: Now, Jerry and I, we're not dicks.
Speaker: We're not the type of comedians like they're going to go, fuck you, lady.
Speaker: You don't like it.
Speaker: You can get out.
Speaker: Go downstairs and go to an art museum if you don't like real comedy.
Speaker: That's not us at all.
Speaker: We are empathetic, gracious human beings, and we wanted to handle this situation in a delicate way.
Speaker: So Jerry immediately apologized, and I said, Miss,
Speaker: That was Taylor's own experience.
Speaker: He was joking about it.
Speaker: That's how he finds comfort in a difficult time in his life.
Speaker: And I'm sorry if you didn't enjoy it.
Speaker: And she just said, it's not funny.
Speaker: It's not funny.
Speaker: Jerry continues to calm her down.
Speaker: We're both kind of just talking our way through the situation.
Speaker: And I said, listen, miss,
Speaker: We're going to have a lot of comedians up here tonight that are going to talk about a variety of issues.
Speaker: Some of them are going to be for you.
Speaker: And some of them, like right now, it's not going to be for you.
Speaker: And that's okay.
Speaker: And Jerry goes, yeah, you know, you're going to probably enjoy things later in the show.
Speaker: And I said, would you like me to talk about how I almost died of cancer last year?
Speaker: Would you prefer to hear that over the mental institution stuff?
Speaker: And the woman looks at me and goes, yes, please.
Speaker: Okay, so it's okay for me to talk about almost dying from cancer, but Taylor being in a psych ward, not good.
Speaker: Later in the opening set, Jerry was making a joke about how all porn has to be stepbrothers and stepsisters and family oriented now.
Speaker: And the woman is cracking up and I go, wait a minute, miss.
Speaker: I got to just draw a line here.
Speaker: So incest, hilarious.
Speaker: Mental institutions, not at all allowed to joke about.
Speaker: Okay, I'm figuring you out.
Speaker: She ended up being a little disruptive throughout the rest of the show, but nothing bad, nothing that the comedians couldn't handle and play with.
Speaker: She actually led to some amazing moments throughout the show.
Speaker: Ian Edwards, hilarious comic.
Speaker: Look him up if you don't know who he is.
Speaker: He played with her so brilliantly, doing a bit about reincarnation, and it was just perfect.
Speaker: Just beautiful timing, a true pro.
Speaker: It was great.
Speaker: But here's why I want to talk about this, because she did end up having a really good time.
Speaker: If you get offended at a comedy show, that's on you.
Speaker: It is not the comedian's fault for talking about something that made you uncomfortable.
Speaker: Now, obviously, this was a hot button issue for this woman.
Speaker: Maybe she'd been in a mental institution herself.
Speaker: Maybe a family member had.
Speaker: Maybe she had been stabbed with a pencil.
Speaker: We don't know.
Speaker: But to sit there in the front row and be so triggered to say, it's not funny.
Speaker: It's not funny when a whole room of people is laughing and enjoying themselves.
Speaker: Well, that's kind of on you.
Speaker: And if you get offended at a comedy show,
Speaker: That's okay, but that doesn't mean everyone else is offended as well.
Speaker: A few minutes after this, Steve Fury was up on stage, great comic as well, and he was joking about child slavery, and she is clapping her hands, throwing her head back, laughing it up, and I'm just thinking, like, child slavery?
Speaker: It's just so funny that people think they're entitled to for us to take care of them.
Speaker: at a comedy show.
Speaker: If you don't like something, don't laugh at it.
Speaker: It's probably going to be done being talked about in the next couple of seconds or minutes and onto something else.
Speaker: That's what we do.
Speaker: We very rarely stay on one topic for a long period of time.
Speaker: You were not coming to the hilarious laugh at mental people show.
Speaker: No, it wasn't the crazy psych hour.
Speaker: You were at a comedy show and a person talked about their own experience being in a psych ward.
Speaker: It just felt so self-important.
Speaker: And that's the part that I can't get behind is that you could just sit there and take it on the chin and be silent.
Speaker: and get through it, but you had to make a scene.
Speaker: You had to make it about you.
Speaker: You had to know that you, everyone had to know that you're special and you couldn't handle this very specific joke.
Speaker: Because we talked about plenty more dark and messed up topics for the rest of the show.
Speaker: I made some joke about being Hitler in a past life.
Speaker: Did people go, oh, yes, of course.
Speaker: It wasn't my best riff, to be honest with you.
Speaker: It wasn't that funny.
Speaker: But yeah, you got to swing.
Speaker: Sometimes you miss.
Speaker: That was a foul ball with a tiny little dirt mustache.
Speaker: I don't feel bad for this woman.
Speaker: I will say this.
Speaker: I am proud that she stuck around for the rest of the show and gave her all to the rest of the comedians.
Speaker: I'm glad that she didn't completely shut down.
Speaker: I think that was very big of her to not just walk out and leave because she could have.
Speaker: That's what I thought she was going to do.
Speaker: And if somebody walks out a minute or two into your show,
Speaker: They didn't really give you an opportunity.
Speaker: Like, we've all seen a movie where the beginning is like, what is this?
Speaker: But if you stop 30 seconds in, well, you're never going to get to the part where they get to the chocolate factory and everything is all bright and colorful and delicious.
Speaker: You're just going to be Charlie, sitting in school, not really learning chemistry, being too poor to afford a bar of chocolate.
Speaker: It's okay if you get offended by things.
Speaker: What's not okay?
Speaker: It's trying to implement your views onto the other people around you that don't even know you.
Speaker: You don't know them.
Speaker: The beauty of a group of people enjoying art, typically, is that they are all strangers that have collected together for the first time ever.
Speaker: This specific group of people has never been together in the same place at the same time.
Speaker: So they're all working to coexist into one universe.
Speaker: unit that experiences a larger whole.
Speaker: And if one person tries to disrupt the unit and become the center of it, everything can break down.
Speaker: Now, luckily that didn't happen.
Speaker: And I think a lot of that tailors to the fact that Jerry and I were very calm and very kind about the situation.
Speaker: But if you're going to go to a show,
Speaker: If you're offended by something, keep it to yourself.
Speaker: There's no reason to go home and write about it on the internet.
Speaker: You can just shut up about it.
Speaker: That goes for restaurant reviews, you Yelpers that are like, oh, the server, they were rude to me.
Speaker: Then don't go back.
Speaker: Don't ruin a person's reputation because you had one bad experience.
Speaker: Did they kill your family?
Speaker: Did they kidnap your daughter and hold her ransom?
Speaker: No.
Speaker: They forgot to take the tomatoes off your club sandwich.
Speaker: Boo!
Speaker: Shut this place down!
Speaker: Think about why you're doing this.
Speaker: And when you go to a comedy show, have an open heart, have an open mind.
Speaker: You don't have to like everything.
Speaker: You don't have to laugh at everything.
Speaker: We're not asking you to do that.
Speaker: If you don't find it funny, wait for the next joke or the next comedian and whatever's going on inside of you, push it down and you can think about later why it upsets you.
Speaker: Now, if you are going to get offended,
Speaker: Please come to my shows and be perfectly verbal about why you dislike me so much.
Speaker: I need to get canceled, everybody.
Speaker: I need a career boost.
Speaker: This week, I'm going to be at the San Luis Obispo Comedy Festival doing a bunch of shows.
Speaker: So if you were anywhere near Central California, San Luis Obispo, Pismo Beach, Palos Verdes, not Palos Verdes.
Speaker: Is that what it is?
Speaker: Something like that.
Speaker: Please come on out.
Speaker: SlowComedyFest.com has all the tickets.
Speaker: And the next Perfect Dose, if you want to get really offended, is going to be on March 13th, 8 p.m.
Speaker: at the World Famous Comedy Store.
Speaker: You do not want to miss that one.
Speaker: We are putting together in another incredible lineup for you all.
Speaker: It should be available very, very soon.
Speaker: So check out those shows, HooperComedy.com.
Speaker: Follow me at Hooper Hair Puff on all social media.
Speaker: I'm doing a lot of fun things right now, everybody.
Speaker: And I don't want to offend you, but also I kind of do, you stupid cooch.
Speaker: I love you.
Speaker: I'll see you next week.
